#i'm nit actually moving out for real

[moinsbienquekaworu]

We're leaving Saturday morning, I just took basically all of my clothes out of my closet and piled them near my suitcase so we know what I'm taking, and seeing my closet all empty (except for all the stuff I never wear I'm not taking with me) is like. Oh my god I'm leaving and I'm not coming back for months. Every time I leave for holidays I think "oh I should take this and this and this and this juust in case, yeah it's just a week but what if I really need my thick socks in the middle of summer?" before I restrain myself and just take three t-shirts, but now that I have the opportunity to pack literally everything in there, it feels wrong. I should not actually be packing up every piece of clothing I still wear. The clothes that stay at home are proof that I'm coming back, if I take them with me too there's no reason for me to go back!

[adventuringblind]

Hi, would you be able to write Oscar Piastri x Shy!reader. Maybe she’s absolutely stunning so other drivers go up to her and flirt with her but she doesn’t respond. Then they see her with Oscar and are a bit shocked.

Thanks 🤍✨

Shy

Oscar Piastri x reader

Genre: Fluff

Request: yes :)

Summary: Sometimes being shy makes people want to know more

Warnings: terrible flirting

Notes: I cracked myself up writing this because I am terrible at fluffy things. I love it.

Masterlist

To say you're shy is not exactly the word you would use. More like... particular.

Your words are few, and you like talking to the people who matter most in your life. Mingling at parties is not something you get joy out of.

When your friend decided to drag you out for the night, you were already frustrated. Even more so when everyone seemed to want to talk to you about their personal lives and amazing achievements.

Then there was Oscar.

You hid from the party in a quiet corner. The breath you'd been holding finally escaping through your teeth. Until He came around the corner.

His stupidly pretty eyes and fluffy hair caught you off guard. You blame the alcohol you had to help you get through this event.

"I take you your not one for parties?"

You wanted to say something snarky and sarcastic. But his voice was far to pleadent to let you do such a thing.

"It's okay, I'm not either, wanna get out of here?"

A simple proposal that changed everything. Oscar kept conversation going, and if you didn't feel like talking, he didn't care.

Sometimes, you would just bask in the comforting silence of each other. Words became unnecacry.

He obviously made the first move as you were far too shy to attempt an advance.

You blushed a lovely shade of red when he kissed you the first time.

And now you're here, traveling the world with him as much as possible, watching him race. It's funny how things work out.

You spend time walking around the paddock looking for the few friends you'd made. Lando being one of them. He teased you and Oscar relentlessly because of how private you are. The papaya colored Brit seemed to be the only one who knew you two were dating.

Other drivers had asked on multiple occasions if you were with Lando. The majority of them thought you were someone's relative and tried to hit on you.

The awful pick-up lines were becoming a running joke in the McLaren garage.

Finally, it became too much for you. The reporters wanted to know who you were. The drivers would nit leave you be despite your best attempts at politely telling the to 'fuck off.' And the fans were starting to get out of hand.

"You sure you want to do this? If your not comfortable with it I can always talk with the PR team."

"Yes, but this way will make them all shut up."

"Fair point."

You walk into the paddock with the two papaya boys that day. Again, you could see people's wheels turning.

Oscar dragged you to one of the skysports reporters, knowing they would be the best ones to get their point across.

Lando pulls his phone out to record, and Daniel, Esteban, and Carlos, who'd been trying to win you over, sidle up next to him. Confused as to why you're standing with Oscar, your hands intertwined.

"Oscar, it's great to see you! Can I ask who the lovely lady standing with you is?" Greets an enthusiastic Laura Winters. You'd always liked her the most.

"Actually, Laura, if it's alright with you, I have a request."

Laura eyes him skeptically as he whispers something in her ear. She nods enthusiasticly, which is a good sign to you.

Oscar turns to you and takes your hands in his. You were expecting him to kiss you. Prepared for it all week. You'd already deleted your social media.

It's a real shock when he gets down on one knee, pulling a box out of his pocket.

Lando is squealing in excitement. The drivers next to him stand frozen, their mouth hanging wide.

You mimick that.

"So I know we planned to just kiss so everyone would finally leave you alone, but I thought this would be even better." A blush creeps across his face, and Laura is grinning so widely you think it might fall off. "I've known since pretty early on that I wanted to spend my life with you, regardless of if anyone says we're too young. I've never cared what they thought, and I'm not starting now. You are the most amazing person I've had the pleasure of meeting. Your witty comments reserved only for me make me feel incredibly lucky. You make me feel important, and I hope I make you feel the same. I want that, forever and always. So, marry me?"

Just like with most times in your life, words don't come easy. You manage to squeak a quiet yes, barely Audible to anyone but Oscar. But he's trained his ears to hear everything you say.

He places the ring on your finger and spins you around in utter joy, landing a perfectly placed and loving kiss to your lips.

Everyone is clapping for you, and you couldn't be happier than I'm this moment. The rest of the world is falling away.

The drivers next to Lando are still processing.

"Did we ever have a chance?" Asks Daniel finally.

Lando snickers. "Afriad not, mate. She's been trying to tell you guys, and you didn't take her reactions as a hint. Looks like you wasted your time on a girl who had her heart stolen."

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 59 Pain Posting

Here we go, dear void. What fresh hell awaits our MC this week? We are back to setting up for the next big story moment, for one, so there's lots to speculate over before waiting to see how it all plays out. Oh, and suffering of course. There's plenty of that for almost everyone.

Bad TL of editor's notes and the colour page (second editor's note could technically be spoilers I guess):

First page: 慘状を前に… [sanjou wo maeni...] "Standing in front of a terrible scene..."] Last page: 死んだハズ… だが…?! [shinda hazu... daga...?!] "Supposedly dead... and yet...?!"

Colour Page Text (removed in EN version): 見据える過酷な旅路 [misueru kakoku na tabiji; "Sights fixed on the difficult journey ahead"]

Not much to say about the colour page except I like how moody it is (and big Makizumi guy is pretty cute with his pose). Guess I was wrong as usual about the Makizumi following Samura. Would be cool if they acted like personal bodyguards to Chihiro! They're the only ones who can really fight against Samura right now due to being presence-less ninjas after all. That's a really interesting conflict for them too- they clearly care for him a lot as the only person who treated them as actual people, and he definitely cares for them in return. His desire to save them during the Hishaku raid wasn't an act in the slightest! But more on that later.

Samura vs. Chihiro: Round 1

Stressed-out scribble-eye Chihiro returns... someone give him a hug.

Glad I didn't try to predict shit because I would have been totally flabbergasted by how this went. Way to make a (technical) liar out of me by saying Chihiro can't die since he's the MC, Hokazono-sensei.

Watching Chihiro break down in real time was so hard, man. This poor guy got his shit rocked by John yesterday at the Rakuzaichi, watched Tenri die a pointless death for the same reasons he's on his own journey, witnessed the horror of his dad's Civilian Murderton 3000 at 1% capacity, and now Samura, one of his heroes, betrayed them all with his dad's legacy. He even got one-tapped when he finally lost his cool for real.

Chihiro seriously can't handle all of this and it's so heartbreaking to see. This guy was not built for a bloody revenge mission at all. Now that he died, though... seriously, what's going to happen next?! Do we switch PoV to a different character while Chihiro's dealing with whatever's happening to him in what looks like a hospital morgue?

There are also some questions about the circumstances of his death and apparent revival- did he really die, or was that Kamunabi misinformation for/from the Hishaku mole? If he did, then how did he come back? And how does that affect his contract with Enten? There's absolutely nothing to go on right now so it's time to hunker down and not go crazy waiting for answers.

Apropos of nothing: I wonder if that wound that Samura gave him will scar. If so, it would mirror the one Uruha had on his shoulder:

RIP I'm still not over you, Uruha.

Probably just a nit-picky detail thing that won't amount to anything, but I wanted to post Uruha from when he was still alive so there you go. I'd be very surprised if Uruha came back somehow even though Chihiro apparently may have escaped death... It seems super-duper extra final that he's toast thanks to the duel he had with his master before getting done in. May you please reappear in flashbacks from time to time so I can get sad that you're no longer with us all over again.

One last thing before we move on to the Hishaku at Disused Building Full of Trash HQ:

SHIBAAAAAA SAVE YOUR NEPHEW AND HIS (BOY)FRIEND

Shiba showing up was in "delusions" territory for me but I'm so glad he's here!

Of course he's getting called out (kind of) for not telling Chihiro the truth- we saw him being one of Kunishige's top glazers back in chapter 1 despite how uncomfortable it made the dude to be praised. So we just have to sit back and wait for the secrets to come out once Chihiro's well enough to at least listen. And if Shiba can bring himself to talk. All the older guys in this manga are so guilty they'd put a Catholic to shame and Shiba already struggles with not being able to deter Chihiro from taking this bloody path in the first place. He almost failed to save a Rokuhira twice now too.

Samura's kindness towards Chihiro is so genuine even when he's trying to kill the kid. Don't ruin the image of Kunishige for him, Shiba- let him live and die in ignorant bliss.

"Your dad's legacy is the problem."

A man who shared Kunishige's vision has come to want to destroy everything about it and help expose the lies that made them into "heroes"... man, is there any non-Hishaku character in this manga that isn't encumbered by some huge amount of guilt?

Toxic Old Man Yaoi

Nice trashed warehouse HQ, bros. Definitely getting "we lost the war and suffered for it" vibes from these guys. I'm willing to stake 1 (ONE) slice of birthday cheesecake on everything I've talked about in the past regarding their origin- that the Seitei War was a civil war, and the Hishaku were on an imperialistic/dynastic side that lost. BECAUSE:

The Owl spread was AMAZEBALLS

MY NEMESIS

It's deliberate! This is the third time this damn vase has shown up, and in four panels this chapter no less! I need lovingly detailed close-ups of every flower to better ID them for the hanakotoba interpretations but I've only gotten a few so far. Most importantly, a matsumoto (elegance/nobility), sakurasou (deep desire), kiku (Imperial imagery), and what might be a poppy (for assured victory) but I'm not completely confident on the last one.

But anyway, yeah. Another yaoi bomb has hit the fandom.

Look at John talking like a five-year-old about unbreakable pinky promises lmao

Did it have to be pinky rings? What's next, they're connected by a red string? HOKAZONOOOOOOOOOOOO

They're in some kind of toxic stew of a relationship for sure with how things went down this chapter. Worst Jeanist helpfully gave us the details of the pact they made to get Samura's help and he's the only one who's concerned that the guy can actually make good on his "promise" to kill them all. Hope he's got some good anxiety management techniques because John won't say a damn thing about what his contingency plans are until they're enacted, apparently.

Can't run from the blind man.

How do you manoeuver against the guy who is set up to be the tactician of the war, though? His ability to super sense things and scout with that awesome-looking Owl power will definitely make it difficult to go against him despite being blind. And the EN TL says "control" here but the wording in JP was closer to "flushing out" like someone who pursues and exposes prey animals or drives cattle/sheep/etc. So Samura's definitely someone who's used to scouting and hunting, making him quite the formidable assassin.

Of course they're using each other though. And of course there's a separate Kamunabi mole that gave away the Rokuhira household's info. Guess we'll get into that shortly since I'm doing a dangerous thing and assuming that the Kamunabi have rounded up the rest of the Bearers at the HQ to chill with them and the Sword Master. Will they have enough manpower to stand against both the Hishaku and Samura by next week? Will Hakuri even wake up by then? Will Chihiro be able to fight at all? Probably since this is a high-octane action series! I'll just have to shut up and accept the condensed timeline sooner or later. (Seriously though, only a week?!)

"消耗 [used up/exhausted/depleted]" is one way to put it, I guess.

Wonder why they didn't kill Hakuri outright if he was such a problem. Do they have something planned for him later? It's not like John cares about sparing people's lives in the way Samura does, so wouldn't he have mentioned it would have been better to get rid of him for good? Eh, probably just a pointless nitpick. Hakuri's staying to the end of the series in all probability, so he just couldn't die here.

Needing to negotiate with other members-John's a first among equals like Beard Guy at the Kamunabi, maybe? Let's meet all the Hishaku members soon to find out!

Samura, Chihiro, Hiurhiko, and Worst Jeanist Musings

[slaps Samura] This bad boy can fit so much misguided grief in it.

This guy is already an incredibly compelling villain that I've done analysis on bit by bit as we got new info, and I gotta say that if I wasn't sold hard on Kyora for personal reasons then Samura would easily be #1 already. He's so complex and multi-layered! I think the detail that makes him great as a "villain" is that his convictions are colder than the surface of Pluto compared to Chihiro's (and most other character's) who burn bright and hot. Samura doesn't have any passion behind what he's doing, just an inflexible will to see a miserable but necessary job through to the end. If Chihiro's an unstable blazing young star, Samura is the black hole that remains after a supernova finally burns out.

The contrast during their first face-off is extremely telling too. Neither hesitate but Samura easily wins due to his composure alone, never mind the skill and experience gap. Poor Chihro's broken inside and out after finding out one of the people his dad trusted is helping his mortal enemies; the stoicism that John fractured the day before completely falls apart here to reveal Chihiro at his lowest.

"Better dead than a guilty sinner," is it? Too late for that!

And Samura's doing it all because he wants to spare him from becoming a tainted sinner. I can't hate Samura at all- he's doing this as an act of kindness with sympathetic motivations despite how far gone off the rails he is. This isn't a typical villain who just wants the world to burn after he wallowed in his misery for too long! I'm looking forward to seeing how Chihiro recovers and prepares to face him again. If he's going to be the one to do it, that is.

Look at this pathetic ugly frog guy.

Just putting this in my back pocket to pull out later if it manifests somehow. I don't have strong feelings one way or the other about Hiruhiko being the one to kill Samura right now, but I do hope he's not redeemed somehow to join the main cast. My feelings on why are extremely petty so I'll just leave it at "don't make him the bonkers former criminal ally guy that everyone sorta tolerates because he's earnest and useful". I will concede that he was almost cute this chapter, though. Worst Jeanist probably deserves a raise for putting up with him.

And now we know how John got his arm back too.

Another healing utility person like the Makizumi, huh? I wonder if we'll get more lore on if this is a field of study that anyone who can use sorcery can take advantage of (like tools), or if it's how their personal abilities manifest. Probably won't get answers unless we spend more time with the Makizumi so here's hoping!

WARNING: TERMINAL BRAIN ROT AHEAD

Not kidding in the slightest about the absolutely mind-numbingly stupid takes about this (very cool!) cover illustration. Skip this if I don't cut it from the final draft of the post unless you're into batshit ramblings from an insane fudanshi.

[feral screeching]

I've got really strong feelings about this cover. REALLY strong. Only the first of them is justified though. Kinda.

One, HIYUKI IT'S BEEN SO LONG I MISS YOU COME BACK TO THE MAIN STORY SOON! She looks so cool too! I love that she doesn't have to do blatantly feminine stuff ever- she's 100% badass and awesome every time she shows up. I'm waiting warmly for your return, my Spaghetti Queen! Use your frenemy rival status to help Chihiro overcome his issues this arc!

This cover and some of the community's reactions to it sparked a lot of thoughts that I've been working out for the past few days. Some about how leaks are being handled, some about how people are reacting to the characters and the composition, a lot about Hiyuki herself. The first easy enough: yes, this cover and colour page count as leaks. Don't spread that shit all over social media! Keep leaks a purely opt-in experience for everyone. The rest, well... probably going to have another massive essay since I love Hiyuki but I don't love why she's so refreshing, if that makes sense? And by God do I hate the way she gets treated by most of the fandom. But I'll work all that out over time.

Two, the Hiyuki-Chihiro design parallels are getting to me in a bad way. Like "tinfoil hat and red string on a tack board" levels of baseless speculation. But I think it's extremely deliberate on the author's part to keep using the same black-with-a-splash-of-red-up-top colour palette for them now that they even have matching undone bandages in this art for some reason. Why not have those two do their own thing like Hakuri got to? He actually kind of sticks out as if no one told him to dress all in black for this photo shoot!

I don't want to let my HakuHiro shipper bias get the better of me here though, so I'll just keep the crazy to myself until we learn more and/or I finish getting the Hiyuki thoughts in order.

Three, HEROINE HAKURI PROPAGANDA!

I'm being completely serious here! I've been banging pots and pans while screaming from the rooftops (internally) about how Hakuri is in the traditional heroine role since I wrote that HakuHiro essay around Chapter 38! He spares Hiyuki from having to balance things out by providing a soft touch because that's his job. And he's so good at it!

Seriously look at his pose! He's leaning in to Chihiro and doing a cute little gesture with his hands, looking so soft while Chihiro and Hiyuki are the baddest motherfuckers to ever exist! Hokazono-sensei was extremely serious when he said he intended for Hakuri to add cuteness. He's so cute! CUTE! But it's not like he's a total uwu marshmallow either- he's still got a really cool outfit on that highlights his boyish charm. He's just the "soft" one to Chihiro's cool and Hiyuki's fierce.

I know I'm a delusional lunatic for going nuts over this. And I hope it's clear that I'm not taking this as a sign that Hakuri's going to be an actual love interest. I'm not that far gone. I'm just always appreciating that Hakuri and Hiyuki essentially swapped roles in a traditional shounen trio in terms of what kind of balance they bring to the dynamic. I think it's an underrated aspect of Kagurabachi's appeal and I wish more shounen did this! Hokazono-sensei seems to love cute guys and cool women and I am 100% behind him if that's the case.

Rough entry but I'm not having a good time lately. Do your best to survive the rest of the year, kind void. We'll make it through for the sake of finding out how the Kagurabachi cast suffers from week to week if nothing else. Give yourself a little treat today, okay?

[thejackalxi]

Watching "Kahmunrah Rides Again" for the FIRST TIME like...

(Final thoughts and disclaimers at the end, so hold all questions and comments for the end, please. For all my rantings and ravings, I do take a breath and anaylize this fairly and even have my own epiphany.)

Seeing "Kahmunrah Coming Soon" poster made me laugh like the immature boy that I am.

The voice acting is not great. No one sounds even remotely like the original actors, including the way they speak, their natural flow and line delivery doesnt feel beliavble, except for the Ricky Gervais sound-alike who actually was pretty close.

Worse than the voice acting is the dialogue itself. The writing is atrocious!

The scenes with Larry and Nick felt genuine and were actually written pretty nice, immediately followed up with a terrible clunky scene with Larry and his ex-wife.

Inconsistancies ABOUND! There's no Rebel Wilson character and Dr. McPhee doesn't know about the museum coming to life, and with the inclusion of Laa, yes, the script confirms that this takes place after the events of the 3rd film.

The candy bar scene got a chuckle out of me before the badly out of sync Teddy Roosevelt jumpscare. The animation itself is not...awful, that one shot just was sync'd weird.

Seriously, the scenes of Nick sharing dialogue with his dad are the best written bits, it's like being able to come up for air while otherwise drowning in a sea of stupid. I actually got a small chuckle out the Tokyo bathroom joke.

I really hate that Kahmunrah doesn't have his speech impediment...and looks nothing like Hank in NATM2.

WH-what is this voice he's doing? It's super inconsistant. He has an accent, then he doesn't have an accent, his voice is all over the place. At this point I'm completely convinced there was little to no vocal direction and Disney execs didn't care, they just wanted the tracks recorded and mixed by the end of the week. "This is all so bad."

"Ohh, it IS bad, and DON'T interupt me!" The movie is aware, heard my critique, and agrees 🤣 This was the hardest laugh I got out of watching this thing so far...

I HATE HATE HATE this writing and the line delivery *screams into hands, and notices there's still 50 minutes left to watch* Gotta keep going...maybe it gets better??

Personal nit pick, but if my handsome beefcake daddy Kah with massive biceps has superstrength in this cartoon pushing over a whole ass stone column, what sick character designer gave him pool noodle arms??? I mean, are you for real??? LOOK AT THOSE THICK TREETRUNKS, MAN! What sick monster drew him in this cartoon- whatever, it's fine. It's fine. It's just a cartoon, it's fine.

No, it's not fine! Listen! Kahmunrah's entire design in this animated movie is offensive and it deeply bothers me, I recognize that it shouldn't bother me, but it does, and it's wrong and I don't like it...Ill tell ya how I really feel, I don't particularly care for this cartoon....*takes a breath* Moving on...

Ugh...and the poster of Merenkare looks NOTHING like Ben Kingsley either *sigh* Im kind of glad Ahkmenrah is M.I.a. from this film because I'm sure the character designer knew they couldn't replicate Rami Malek's angelic beauty and perfectly capture his face, so they just didnt bother.

stop...this dialogue is so unfunny and delivered so baddddd *cries*

"Technically he was never a pharaoh because [insert badly written quick exposition]" FALSE!! First of all, Teddy, you weren't there, so shut your goddam moustachio'd mouth. Second, if the writer of this thing had watched ANY of the movies or done any research into this franchise (they clearly didn't, who am I kidding), Kahmunrah WAS passed over and the throne given to his little brother Ahkmenrah who, after only a year on the throne, was violently murdered by Kahmunrah and reclaimed his rightful place on the throne for 17 years before he passed. Did anyone on this production think to ask the original writers or Shawn Levy for creative consultation? Of course not, because it's Night at the Museum now owned by Disney, they don't care to fact check...or even glabce at the original source material 😒 (Turns out yes, they did and they just forgot their own established canon. Don't you be tryin to take away my man's title of Pharaoh, how very dare!)

Yet, they included Joan of Arc who appeared in a NATM spin off junior novel following Nick. Kinda disappointed she's not voiced by Nicole Sullivan 🤣 jk, this actress is good for Joan, Im just a sucker for Clone High.

"Let's dance." Kahmunrah draws khopesh (hot)

"No dancing, just swords." Joan replies. I actually giggled, that was cute, until,

"Silly girl, that was a metaphor! A metaphor is not literal-"

Dammit movie!! Stop killing your own jokes by pointing out why the joke is meant to be funny! Stop! Let me just TRY to have a laugh! This dialogue is just bad. Please don't follow up your jokes with, "See, that's funny BECAUSE-" Stop! We get the joke, it's annoying! I get they were trying to match the improv comedy tone of NATM, but they failed so hard doing so!

*Kahmunrah talks more*

BRO, PICK A VOICE! PICK JUST A SINGLE TONE, PICK A LANE! PICK ONE ACCENT AND STICK WITH IT! One minute you sound like if Hank Azaria was on ALL of the drugs, a Mark Hamill's Joker-esque tone, then you sound insanely British, now you have an American accent, some sort of demented gremlin voice, and now sound like Jafar?? PICK A VOICE, MAN!! And of all these voices, still no teeth lisp. A crime.

"Don't eat me, or this will be a very short movie!" Please do, a fourth wall joke doesn't work for Kahmunrah, that really should be Teddy Roosevelt's shtick.

Also REALLY bothers me that they made Jedediah a freckled red head.

"Let gho of me you Phillestines!" And now Kahmunrah is Mark Hamill? Why...did he deliver that line like the Joker?

"I need backup, the ULTIMATE backup." Now he's what, Haas Delgado? What are these vocal choices his actor is doing?

Also, not the voice actors fault here, but why is Kahmunrah's khopesh sheethed in the back inside his tunic like that? Is his blade nestled in his ass crack? 😂 Why animators did you make such a terrible choice??? He could've had a sheath at his hip, but...why in the back like this???

There's still 40 minutes left, HOW???

And again, just when I feel like we've settled into an American scary guy voice for Kah, he slips into the Joker again. brah....brah...come on.

Seth's accent isn't very tight or consistant either, but I'm so exhausted by the insanity of Kahmunrah's vocal deliveries to really care. Speaking of which, he alives a Scorpion statue and his voice COMPLETELY changes tone and delivery style... again. I know I could just stop watching, but Ive made a comittment to see it through.

"Is it really bad?..." Teddy asks, Nick and I happen to say at the same time, "Yeah, it's still really bad." (Though we're clearly not talking about the same thing) 😂

Seriously, the khopesh is like RIGHT down the crack of his ass!!

"I smell Kahmunrah's musk-" YOU SMELL WHAT?! You know his SCENT?

"Fire burn." "I know the feeling." DAMMIT JOAN! 🤣 Ya got me on that one.

Aw, this scene building Nick up, this was nice. A breath of air before Im sure it goes back to shit quickly...

A fart joke, yup. Sadly I was right.

Yup, and then the movie reminds us that Robin Williams would've had a funny improv bit as Teddy, except it would be actually funny and naturally paced, and the other characters would be chuckling and trying not to bust up laughing, and not a phoned-in unfunny delivery like it is here in this cartoon where the characters are annoyed and critisize Teddy's reminiscing. I miss Robin so much. He was such a light on this world.

"We have an hour left before sunrise, come on!" Well, once again the franchise doesn't seem to understand how short an hour actually is. You're two hours deep into Ancient Egypt, you still have to stop Kahmunrah, leave the portal, get through the Art Museum, back on the Subway to get to the Natural History Museum...all in the span of an hour...Sure (Yes, they find a way to get home in time, that's the point, I know).

Jedediah shouts, "Don't forget to swallow!" I have died!

"Once I insert my tablet into the sarcophagus-" ...*slowly raises eyebrow* Once you insert WHAT now??? "My army will RISE!" ...sir... I hate your voice, I despise so much of the dialogue throughout this movie, but THAT line *slow clap* truly a masterpiece, *chef's kiss* Thank you to whomever wrote that line for me.

"We can't let that bully win." "Bully!....I mean, yes I agree." Oh now with less than 20 minutes I'm mildly enjoying myself.

And the "heiroglyph" of the 2nd chord to the combination in the MIDDLE of the tablet looks like :===

This cartoon has turned SUPER innuendo-y all of a sudden 🤣

HELL YEAH! A jackal army is WAY COOLER a birdmen army in my personal opinion. Damn, if only the voice actor had actually tried to sound like Hank (or if the vocal director didn't at his job) and Kahmunrah's design wasn't so awkward, I'd say that's insanely hot...Imagining Hank Azaria's Kahmunrah commanding a muscled canine-man army is one of the sexiest sounding things I could imagine...too bad it only exsists in this cartoon without Hank and not live action WITH Hank (obviously) 🥲

"Yes, my minions, ATTACK!" Now, imagine that line said in a commanding English accent and a forward lisp, while pointing with a big muscular arm....HOT!

UGHHH Why...why was he drAWN WITH STICK ARMS? *personal breakdown for the hundredth time watching this hour and 10 minute cartoon movie*

"Fine, then leave Son of Larry..."draws sword, "to me!" delivered in what I can only describe as freaky goblin voice. Why...? This...this would be so sexy, except everything is wrong.

That's it, I'm transcribing every bit of his dialogue and recording what he SHOULD sound like, and y'all will agree, they should've brought Hank back for this!

This weird goblin voice...this is the voice he's settled on now I guess, er...nope, nope, apparently we're going back to sounding like Jafar. Good god, just let this movie end.

They're using a poster of the natural history museum to get back while they're in a painting at another museum...I don't think that's how that would work, but I don't...I don't care, I want this to just be over.

Teddy, why are you not freezing with Texas-? Augh, who cares?

So Shawn Levy AND Chris Columbus produced this??? How much of a hand did they really have in this, because it was a nightmare.

*Does some Googling*...The AUTHOR of the original Night at the Museum children's book that the franchise is based on was one of the screenwriters? Did NOT see that one coming!

All in all, this movie got a few chuckles out of me, and the plot is pretty much a re-skinned version of Night at the Museum 2 Battle for the Smithsonian. It's not a bad concept, just a little weak as a final installment to the franchise.

My biggest issues come from the predominantly awkward dialogue, the joke murdering, granted it's hard to translate that vibe and live action comedic improv that leans more mature into a cartoon movie for a younger audience. The writers were bound to their screenplay and didnt have the luxury of improvizational comedy gold from the likes of the original NATM cast. With what they were constrained to, they tried their best, sometimes jokes worked, but most of the time it just didn't.

Some of the character designs were wonky, but I didn't mind the art style itself, Im just nit picky about the choices in Kahmunrah's design and his overall color palette.

But above all, the voice acting was ROUGH in places! Some performances were great, Joan was solid, Jed surprised me in the end when he finally started to sound like Owen Wilson, the Ricky Gervais sound-alike was decent enough, and Joshua Bassett as Nick was pretty decent as well, but Teddy Roosevelt, do I need to say it? No one will ever be Robin Williams, but Disney could've found a sound-alike.

And FINALLY, my guy, Mr. Joseph Kamal...what were you doin, man?

I mean, I tried to keep an open mind, and I am all for a voice actor putting their own spin on a character performance, but my man, this was not good, and I'm really disappointed.

*RESEARCHES Kamal's IMDB page* SOooo, in...SOME fairness, this was only his 2nd ever voice acting/voice over role. He's only ever done minor acting roles in serious television dramas or soap operas.

That being said, as a freelance voice over artist and voice actor, voice acting is NOT easy, especially when you have BIG BIG BIGGG shoes to fill from long time crazy-talented voice actor Hank Azaria. I just think Kamal was simply miscast into a role that was too much for him to take on. And I also blame whoever was in charge of vocal direction. Sometimes for voice actors, without a strong director, in a big vocal performance, the choices made in a delivery are too vast, like throwing darts into the universe while blind folded. You just kinda throw a variety of deliveries out there and ultimately it's up to the director and the editor which takes to go with.

Maybe that was it! Kamal did multiple deliveries of lines with varying styles because again, lack of strong direction, and the editor ultimately just threw these unfitting takes together making Kahmunrah sound batshit insane in not a good or well executed way...I wanna give this guy the benefit of the doubt.

3/10 There were ideas here, but this movie was painful to get through.

[importantdestinydefendor]

My Death Mark OC is done!

This is Hagihara Rina. She is a very timid and shy person.

A small profile:

Age: between 35-40

Height: 5'4 (162 cm)

Weight: 119lbs (54 kilos)

Occupation: part-time florist at "Myazakis Flowerfield"

She is the middle child of three children. Her older sister is called Nao, and her younger brother is called Yasu. Her parents are called Hagihara Toshiro (her dad) and Okabe Kaori (her mom). They have been divorced since Rina was an early teenager. Her father left with Yasu, and Rina and Nao were homeschooled since then.

She loves to nit, sew, and everything like that. Takes care of some specific flowers in the shop (for example: she grows her own daffodils). She has worked at the flower shop since she was a teenager. The owners of the shop are the elderly couple Daichi and Jun Myazaki, and they act as her adoptive grandparents. Her favourite colour is anything between pink and red and her favourite flower is the daffodil.

Uuuuuuh I think that is all I wanna say for now?? Since I actually plan to write a fanfiction for her (not in the scale as Firelight AU is turning out to be). So there is not much backstory I can give here except for the divorce part. Finally, I have a character that doesn't have a green/grey/brown/blue-palette! I am not the biggest fan of pink or red personally, but I wanted to draw a character with pink being their primary colour for sooo looong! And I actually finally have one! WOOOOO!

Also I made up her weight based off of my own height and weight ratio + taking in her current mental state (which is just a shit show) and converted it from cm to pound. I wanted to compare it to Yashikis weigth and hoo boy! His weight doesn't really match his height (he weighs around 137lbs (62 kg)) which is as much as I do in real life! And I am tiny comapred to him! (He is 5'11 (180 cm) while I'm 5'3 (162 cm)) So that took a few years of my life. But that just shows how good his character design is as you can really see his lankiness. (And I'm getting off track, this is about my OC not Yashiki. Move over, old man!)

ANYWAY! Tell me what you think in the comments! (Close ups under keep reading)

[papirouge]

I can’t stop crying, I’ve lost more friends in Gaza… yet so many Christian evangelicals have yet to even mention that Christians in Gaza exist. Or if they do, it’s criticism and blaming Gaza for the genocide that’s happening. It’s as if they fully believe it’s a Jew/Muslim conflict when it’s not. It’s an idf-Hamas conflict.

I lost contact with one of my friends and haven’t been able to get any info. The terror keeps coming. And there was no where to go, it hurts. And I’m so angry at that Christians in the west just ignoring it all

.......... I'm really sorry anon...

I've never felt that powerless in my life, and my heart aches for all those people being murdered before our eyes, and the Christian community either condoning such heinous act or turning the head around... They will have to take accountability for their cowardice....

The body of Christ is ONE. If someone cuts your leg or hand, you will definitely feel it and your whole body is going to react to it. But Western Christians? They look away like the cowards that they are. Mind you, they are the same ones that are so suuuuure to resist the antichrist when he will come. Meanwhile, they are unable to voice the slightest support to our Christian brothers in Palestine out of fear... What kind of clownery is that? At least, I don't mind people refusing to cover any sort of world news bc they are consistent in their lane, but I'm thinking about all those Christians who have aaaaaalways so many things to say abt the latest stupid stunt in the news, the wokes, feminists, liberals... Suddenly they are VERY quiet. That's a choice. They are disgusting.

Even the anti Muslim/let's protect Christianism from Islam uwu Christian YouTuber squad are pulling out video exPoSinG Hamas while not saying a single word abt the Christian casualties (David Wood, Apostate Prophet, etc.) They are full of it, and I will never ever again take them seriously in their defense of Christianity in middle east when those ghouls don't even have a word to say about our Palestinian Christian brothers dying under Israeli strikes and PLEADING for our attention and prayers... They only care about Christians dying because of ISLAM, when they die for any other reason, they will defiect. Like, yeah, Hamas sucks - we been knew. What's the point of making 1 video a day about them? In what way does it remotely dismiss the atrocity of whatever's happening in Gaza???

It's so sick to see pro Israel constantly move the goalpost to paint themselves as the only victims, and worse, downplaying what's happening in Gaza.

They will deflect on antisemitism in pro Palestine protests (while acting like the very same didn't happen in pro Israel protests with the most rabid islamophobic genocidal crap), semantics about what Zionism is and whether it's antisemitism (meanwhile palestinians are literally DYING), that they don't care about Gaza as long as the hostage aren't fred (when if they actually really cared abt the hostages they wouldn't encourage Israel to bomb Gaza bc the actual hostages risk dying out there along the Hamas...🤦🏾‍♀️), or shouting "free Gaza from Hamas !!" as if any of that justified bombing civilians... oh and let's not forget the feminist/liberal edge of Israel defense with the "Palestianian are sexist/homophobic so there's no point defending them" stupid narrative....

I think the reason pro Israel are so bad in their rhetoric is that for years they've been used to leverage their Jewishness to get empathy and immunity against accountability.

But it's over now. We have social medias and we can witnessing in real time the horror of Tsahal actions. How they aren't any morally better than Hamas. We've seen the Israeli mocking Palestianians nit having water or food...

"you were quiet when the Hamas assassinated Israelis" we were quiet because this operation went so fast and that Israel quickly retaliated. There was no way to stop the Hamas bc NO ONE knew it was coming, so what did they expect us to do?? Just bc we don't say anything doesn't mean we approve. Do you see people condemn suicide/terrorist attacks whenever they happen?? IMO there wouldn't be such an outrage is Israel left it at that and didn't go overboard with launching a whole war against Gaza. The reason the world is siding with Palestinian is because we are witnessing the ongoing massacre of population with the actual (political and/or economical) backup of our respective countries for DAYS now. Unlike the Hamas attack, there are ways to stop it. The Hamas didn't cut the water & food supply of Israelis. Palestinians aren't clowning on social medias the Jewish civilians who were killed by the Hamas. That's why the world is shocked and is siding with Palestine and is slowly but surely getting fed up with the cognitive dissonance of Israelis crying oppression while acting like soulless ghouls. Crying antisemitism isn't fooling anyone anymore.

[solreads]

Single Player - Review

Title: Single Player

Author: Tara Tai

Genre: Romance

Audience: Adult

Format: Novel

Representation: Nonbinary POV character

Summary: Cat Li’s love life is flourishing – in dating sims and RPGs. In real life it’s anything but and she’s looking forward to another Thanksgiving with her parents asking pointedly after her nonexistent partner. At least, she thinks, she’s finally taken her career in a direction she loves (though her family’s no more pleased with that) after she moved from accounting to writing for video games. Nothing seems more perfect to her than not only landing a position working on Compass Hollow, one of the most anticipated role-playing games in development, alongside some of her idols in the industry but also being asked to take point on developing the romances. That is until she meets her boss, the arrogant and condescending narrative director Andi Zhang who dismisses in-game romance and Cat herself immediately. Cat is determined to make the most of her time working on Compass Hollow despite being ignored and shuffled off to menial tasks if only she could control her temper around Andi. 

Fresh from a controversy that led to them being doxxed and harassed and knowing all too well the bigotry of the gaming industry, Andi has threadbare patience for yet another sexist man in power, so when their boss demands they shoehorn romance into Compass Hollow to appeal to female gamers they push back hard. Their cynicism towards romance and contempt for their boss weren’t supposed to splash back on their new temp, but Cat’s starry-eyed love of romance can’t help but get under Andi’s skin. It’s only when they’re forced to work together not only to write the game but to save it and Andi’s career that their relationship begins to thaw… and heat up. 

Reflections: I'm not going to lie, Cat’s gamer-speak quirkiness was irritating at points. It wasn’t all the time; plenty of her ways of relating things to games or making references seemed natural, but it could cross that line into cringe-inducing at points. She has hints of a sense of superiority about having this nerdy niche (is it niche?) hobby too. 

Cat and Andi’s inability to communicate in the form of clearly thinking out what they should say to each other and then just not doing it was the main driving force of the plot, so you’ve got to be into miscommunication/lack of communication tropes to enjoy it. I was okay with it for the most part, but when their relationship developed further I wish their communication skills had kept up. 

That said, both of their conflicting perspectives on romance in gaming and the direction Compass Hollow should have gone were fleshed out well in their individual perspectives even as they continued to barely talk about it. Gaming culture and the way the main characters interact with it was nuanced and compelling. The toxic sides weren’t shied away from, but there was genuine love and understanding of why gaming can matter so much to different people as well. 

Now my nit to pick that nobody else will. I really don’t like when the (supposed) inability to feel romantic love is thrown out as an insult or a way to make a character the ‘bad guy’ in an argument only to later ‘redeem’ them by showing that actually they can feel deep romantic love they’ve just been burned by it before. The character’s behaviors are treated as automatically worse if they’re from a place of genuinely not feeling, understanding, or enjoying romance versus the exact same behaviors from a tragic romantic. You don’t have to contrast the two. You don’t have to make aromanticism or the inability to “catch a single feeling,” as Cat says, an insult.

Cat did this explicitly in one of her first big moments of standing up for herself and more implicitly at other points. And it put me off.  Andi made Cat’s life difficult and was a dick to her at first. This was true whether or not Andi could feel love. Similarly, talking about their painful past and difficult feelings later could still have been a moment of connection and understanding. It could still recontextualize Andi's previous behaviors for Cat without any of that other bullshit coming first.

Warnings: Depictions of misgendering, transphobia.

Notes on Rep: Andi identifies on-page as an enby.

[romilly-jay]

The Word is Murder

***again, writing to remind future-me how much I loved this series and what I enjoyed about them ***

I've been taking time out from the real world for the past two years to study for my MFA in Creative Writing. Okay, that's philosophically flawed in various ways - what makes me think there's a world that's real and other worlds that aren't real or that it's possible to move between them or that I am able to identify correctly which is which?

Starting again - I'm a midlife MFA student (just finishing) and it's been lovely and disorienting in roughly equal measure to get to spend two years among people who take seriously the idea that writing books and publishing them is A Thing It's Possible To Do.

Not equally possible for everyone. Do I need to say that? I mean, yes.

And even once a book is published, there's so much we don't really know about why one suddenly breaks through and succeeds, but we do know that without oxygen, without marketing exposure, it won't.

A roundabout way of saying that I hadn't heard of the Detective Hawthorne series until Anthony Horowitz was talking about them on a Radio Four breakfast show - aka not an opportunity afforded to every author - and I don't know how many other listeners also thought "Oh my, this sounds like exactly something I'd love " and rushed out to get hold of a copy. *I* did (library copy but yay libraries and I'm *strongly* considering actually buying the latest one...)

And this is why I knew I was likely to like it (quite apart from the fact that I'm a big fan of Foyles War so felt advance-comfortable about the likely tone)... it's a book that, as a central device, breaks the fourth wall. A book where the author presents as a character. YES.

Here's a not-spoilery bit that catches the early establishment of the dynamic between fictional detective and character-version of AH:

Hawthorne smiled at me for the first time...

'Early days, mate. It's only a first chapter. You can tear it up and start again. The thing is, we've got to find a way of working together, a...' he searched for the right phrase.

'A modus operandi,' I suggested.

He pointed a finger. 'You don't want to use posh words like that. You'll just get people's backs up. No. You've just got to write what happens.'

[This is in ch3, when they're arguing over the exact text I've just read as the start of ch1, with DH giving AH factual corrections and pushback - I'm amused by the nit-picking. I'm amused that clearly AH wants us to be aware that "his" version of ch1 is the one that got used. And there's also plenty of fun speculation and misdirection.]

Pacey with a light touch, and enough real London places to hook me into a version of the feeling when I've walked across a film crew out on location and I wasn't expecting to see them there. <3 <3.

[allthemusic]

Week ending: 21 April

We are being spoilt for choice at the moment. As I've said a few times, I really do think the mid-1950s is a bit of a transitional period. Rock and roll hasn't arrived in Britian, but a lot of the songs we're now hearing sound distinctly different to the stuff you'd hear in the 1940s and earlier 1950s. Less proper and formal, in a way - long may that continue!

Cherry Pink (and Apple Blossom White) - Eddie Calvert (peaked at Number 1)

I loved this song first time round, and I haven't mysteriously started disliking it. I've said before, for me, if I already really like a song, I'll be strongly inclined to enjoy all covers of it, even if they're not great quality. And this is by no means that. This is a very serviceable version of a song I already liked.

To be honest, I've not much more to say that I haven't already said on the last post about Pérez Prado's version of the song. I kind of expected this version to sound a bit watered down or inauthentic, it being a British cover of a Latin song by somebody called Ronnie Hilton - a decidedly non-Hispanic-sounding name, fitting for this Preston native. But actually, it's mostly just quite a faithful cover, down to the best bit of the original, the woozy slow-down trumpet work.

If I was nit-picking I might say that it's got a bit less of a clear clave rhythm in the percussion, and maybe a little less energy in the non-trumpet instruments? It's also missing the "hyurgh" shout, which was arguably the best moment in the original. However, the trumpet makes up for all that in its sheer riotous enthusiasm, and to be honest, I think if I wasn't paying attention I might not notice all the other differences I noticed. This is just a very similar cover to the original.

I do wonder what the point of covers like that is, sometimes. A cover that dramatically changes a song's vibe or genre, that I get (it's like an AU fanfic, it's the same pleasure). But a perfectly faithful cover confuses me... the original already exists?! I guess it might have come down to some vagaries of 1950s record production and distribution logistics, and just what version of a record people could actuallly get hold of and heard on the radio, but still. Pointless, at least on the face of it.

Not that I'm complaining about more of this song. Did I mention, I love this song?

Ready, Willing and Able - Doris Day (7)

A Doris Day song I've not heard of! I'm not surprised, exactly - she did a lot, and I'm not a superfan or anything - but I am excited, because most Doris Day songs I've come across so far have been real highlights. Secret Love, in particular, I could listen to all day. Doris' voice and general persona is gorgeous, this project has really sold me on her.

We start very strong, with a fast, jazzy opening, Doris singing about how I'm ready / Willing / And able / And honey, now, it's up to you. She's up for some loving, but wants her suitor to commit and make a move. It's a confident, ballsy opening, underscored perfectly by some jazzy trumpet blasts, full big band vibes.

Doris' voice is indeed the star attraction here. She's up against some big brassy sounds and her performance is never once overpowered by it.

I'm also impressed by the modernity of Doris' strightforward proposition here, as she outright states that I'm ready, able and willing / To join you in a little fun / But I won't take second billing / I've got to be your number one. She's taking the lead, stating what she wants, and making the moves to get it, but she's also clear on her boundaries. You get the feeling that Doris is absolutely setting the pace in this relationship, and honestly, it's sexy as anything.

Even sexier, though, is the section just before the end, with the quieter, sultrier lines, all I'm ready / Oh yes, you know I'm ready, baby. It's not explicitly about sex, but it easily could be, you know? Keeps the song classy, for sure.

And then we've got the final section, as Doris blasts out lines about how Now I've stated my condition / I've got lots of ammunition. There's something rock and roll both about the attitude here, and the chord that plays under it. I know I say this periodically about lots of songs I like in this era, but you really can hear the new sounds of rock and roll percolating into places you wouldn't expect them, and this is one example, I think.

Awww, I just love this song. I had a good feeling about it, and my good feeling paid off. Go listen. Not many songs from this project end up in my liked songs list, but this one definitely will.

It's from a musical film, Young At Heart, an update of an earlier film called Four Daughters, where Doris plays opposite Frank Sinatra as the love interest of a songwriter who moves to a small town and gets into romantic hijinks as three sisters all fall for him. The plot summary sounds a little complicated, but it does sound cute - and either way, I think I'd watch it, just for the musical talent!

Stranger in Paradise - Tony Bennett (1)

Something must have been in the water this week in 1955, because here we've got another song that I know, and that definitely stands out. The tune, in particular, is beautiful and iconic. I remember hearing this song for the first time and thinking I already knew it, which is the mark of a catchy hook.

It's also possibly a product of the song's somewhat complicated genesis? It's a song from a 1953 musical called Kismet, itself adapted from a 1911 play, which is an "Arabian Nights" styled fake folk tale romance, set to music by the Russian-Georgian Romantic composer Alexander Borodin, including this song, which is based on one of the Polovtsian Dances from the 1890 opera Prince Igor. This opera, itself based on a much older Russian epic poem, is about the 12th century prince of Novgorod, Igor Svyatoslavich, fighting against Cumans, a Turkic people in the south of modern-day Russia, who were also called Polovtsians. So there are loads of layers of exoticism and historical romanticisation going on even before you look at the lyrics and vibe of the song. And then the musical's duet has been turned into a solo song for a male singer, so that changes it and adds layers again.

We begin with "ooooos" from the backing singers, outlining the main theme to a lush backing of strings and woodwinds, before Tony comes in, an ambitious, soaring leap in his very first line urging his lover to Take my hand / I'm a stranger in paradise.

It's all about the transcendant feeling when you're in love, and I have to say, the lyrics are beautiful. In quick succession, we get lines about how I saw your face and I ascended / Out of the commonplace / Into the rare and about how Somewhere in space I hang suspended. It's a level of earnestness and purple prose that would normally jar, but here it feels thematically appropriate. Love takes you away from the everyday, so why shouldn't your language also be elevated away from the commonplace?

We also get the sense of a certain danger or desperation. From the idea of Tony being left starry-eyed and being lost in a wonderland, to lines that are more explicitly about how There's a danger in paradise / For mortals who stand beside an angel. Tony's lover is something else, and that has a certain fear about it, too. He's worried about getting hurt, still feeling himself a stranger, not wholly "at home" in this realm of perfection that he's somehow ascended into.

And yet the song ends hopefully, with a hope that Tony's love might open their arms to the titular stranger And tell that we need be / A stranger no more. It's a beautiful, hopeful ending, and I like it a lot! Tony really sells it, too - there's a grand sweep to his voice, but also a certain vulnerability in the lines that need it. And all that while maintaining good clear diction - important with such wordy, twisty lines.

Actually, I'm realising thinking about it that it's quite a cerebral, twisty song more generally. The lyrics are hard to follow the first time you hear them, even just in terms of syntax, and there's a certain ambiguity to it, even in what it means to be a "stranger in paradise" and how that changes over the course of the song.

I like that about the song, to be clear, and I also think you can enjoy it without making it that deep. It's pretty and catchy and Tony Bennett can sing nicely. In some ways that's all you need to know.

I could name almost any of these three as my favourite. They're all great. But only one made my liked songs playlist, and in my books, that's a surefire way to earn the final title. So, without further ado...

Favourite song of the bunch: Ready, Willing and Able

[vvendyreads]

Fake It 'til You Make It by Laura Carter

Abbey thought that she was about to have the best night of her life. Her boyfriend, who was also her childhood friend, asks her to dinner and she thinks wedding bells are coming. She is shocked to find that instead of a proposal he actually wants to break up and he's been cheating on her with someone else. To make matters worse, she then quickly loses her job. Abbey decides to turn things around by spending all of her savings on 6 months rent in her dream luxury apartment building. While there, she runs into her ex, who is now dating someone who lives in her building. She's saved from embarrassment by her suave star baseball playing neighbor Mike, who has been bugging her since she moved in. When Abbey and her ex are both invited to her parent's vow renewal in Canada, Abbey decides that she needs a fake boyfriend to bring. Mike volunteers. What Abbey doesn't know is that "Mike Thomas" is actually Ted Thomas, Mike's brother who has been hiding in his brother's penthouse ever since his fiancée cheated on him with his business partner. After Abbey mistakes Ted for his brother, he decides to pretend to be him, fooling Abbey and everyone else.

Thank you to Boldwood Books and NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I had high hopes for this one. I love a good fake dating story. Unfortunately, this one was just not for me. Pros:

Fake dating is always a must read for me. Literally. Tell me a story has fake dating and I'm all in. I love the romantic potential of dating someone you normalize wouldn't in a low stakes way. Even better if the characters initially can't stand each other. How else will they learn to get along? I think this trope is so fun, even if it doesn't really happen nearly as much in real life as media would make us think.

Dual POV: I love getting both characters' perspectives in a story. The great thing about books as opposed to real life, is that you can know exactly what another person is thinking. Especially with how this story goes, I think Ted would have been pretty irredeemable if we hadn't gotten his POV.

Interesting settings: I enjoyed the diversion to Canada. This book was set in New York, which I think is having its moment right now. The author didn't really explore that setting much, so I appreciated that she moved the characters to a different location, so we could at least explore that.

Cons: (Unfortunately, there are more of these than pros for me)

Mistaken identity- I really hate mistaken identity. I honestly wish I had known going in that it would be a part of this book, as I may not have read it. I included it in my summary but the official one for the book only describes Mike/Ted as a "hot neighbor". I would have forgiven the mistaken identity if it had been corrected quickly, but he doesn't come clean (read: get found out) until nearly the end of the book, which made me anxious and frustrated for most of the story. I didn't buy his reasons for keeping up the ruse to Abbey.

Too many Britishisms: I understand that Boldwood Books is U.K. based, so this may be nit-picky and not an actual issue. I would maybe buy that Canadians might have similar ways of speaking to British people and many characters were Canadian, so perhaps those instances were normal. That's all fine, but when the same phrases were coming out of an American character's mouth, it took me out of the story. The American born Ted said things such as "feck" and "join the queue" and "a kilo of strawberry jelly" to name a few. I feel like an editor could have caught this (or hope that one will now!)

Ted was very superficial. He spent a lot of time rationalizing that he wasn't this shallow guy but the brother he was pretending to be is, so he must also act this way to be him. He spends so much time focusing on the looks of the Abbey and his ex and using this as a way to judge them. Ted also spends much of his initial interactions with Abbey deciding that she is superficial for doing really normal things, which felt very hypocritical. He's supposed to be the nerdy, shy guy but he just came off as a jerk. He also repeatedly mocks Abbey's period underwear that she accidentally dropped in front of him, which made me kind of hate him.

The book felt somewhat incomplete. There were story lines that started but didn't go anywhere. For example, Abbey desperately needed a job. A legitimate company wants to offer one and tells Ted to have her contact them, but he never tells her about it. The book also ends pretty quickly. I would have appreciated an epilogue to know how it ends.

Neutral?

I think that my ultimate issue is that this felt like a mid 90s-early 2000s chick lit/romance. The characters fell into a lot of the boxes of this time: the guy is a jerk, the girl is in distress, there's lots of talk of shopping and a glamorous life. This kind of book was incredibly popular and I'm sure that plenty of people will appreciate it. I think there was a lot of potential in this book, but it just wasn't my cup of tea.

3 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️

[nytehavyn-circle]

Tolaas gently took her hand, and squeezed it. "I akin't gonna hurt ya, darlin', I promise." He hoped the tone of his voice assured her that he was telling the truth.

He took her hand, brought it up to his fangs, and had her run a finger over the tooth, even having her gently touch the point. When she was finished, he tilted his head at her and then smiled. "Told ya. Real." He winked.

“Alright, so...” he began, exhaling slowly, “Livin’ Vampire. Well, ta start, I ain’t dead.  Ain’t undead, neither,” he chuckled.  “Quite alive, I assure ya, but I akin't human.  I gotta feed, but not near as often as other sorts a’vamps - maybe once every two weeks - an’ I ain’t gotta kill when I feed.  Ain’t gotta, and ain’t got the desire. Now that's not saying other Livin' Vamps don't. We have free will, we can choose how we feed, we ain't compelled ta kill when feedin', 'less'n ya wanna focus on that compulsion."  He ran a hand over his hair, then looked at Anne again.  “Usually, I feed from donors.  Like ya've heard me mention tanight. But all my donors'er willin’ people.  An’ I usually like ta feed durin’ sex.”  He gave her a sly, almost flirtatious grin.  “Though I don’t hafta feed durin’ sex; just more fun that way. Heightens the whole experience. Also, I do need ta eat. Regular food an’ drink. Alcohol's just one a'my vices," he laughed. "So, like I said - livin’ vampire..”

He refilled his glass with the Jack and took a drink, looking at her once again. He checkd her aura, searched her eyes, sent out his "feelers" to check to hope he wasn't scaring her away or making hr think he was crazy.

Tolaas continued. "We can’t turn inta bats, can't turn inta mist; nothin' a'that nature.  We got heightened senses, an' heightened abilities - stronger’n humans.  Now, I can die - like, actually die die.  I can get a mortal wound an’ bleed ta death if’n I ain’t got enough blood ‘round ta help the healin’ process.  If'n ya cut off my head, I’m a corpse.  Stab me in the heart - well, ya ain’t gotta use a stake fer that one.  If'n ya stab me in the heart an’ I’m dead, period.” He shrugged and raised his hands.

"And, like all Livin' Vampires, I’m a empath.  Meanin’ I can pick up on exactly what someone else is feelin’.  Now, I can’t read minds… but alotta the time, what someone is thinkin’ usually correlates ta what they’re feelin’.  So, in an odd way, that sometimes forms images in my head.  So, telling ya what yer thinkin’?  Just a’offshoot a’what yer feelin’.  Because, I can see an' read auras.  Which usually tells me a nit more 'bout the person. What their thoughts'er doin' ta their auras - seein' the spikes and hills, swirlin' colors, ebbs an' flows - it can show me whether they're human er not, and this ability, 'long with my empathy, can help me pinpoint on whether her not someone is lhyin' ta me, whether er not someone's not such a nice person, ya know, stuff like that.” Another drink from his glass.

He didn't notice that while he was telling Anne this, he had moved a bit closer to her. What he was telling her was, in an odd sense, sort of intimate. Which made his body react, because he was definitely attracted to her. Their legs were touching.

Tolaas continued. “That’s purdy much it, save fer the sun.” He gestured vaguely upward.  “Now, I don’t become vampire flambe,” he laughed.  “But the longer I’m out in direct sunlight, the sicker I can get - get sorta heat sickness quicker’n a human would.  In the shade?  I’m purdy much fine.”

He gave a shrug.  “There ya have it, darlin’.” He smiled at her. "Now the rest is up ta you. Ya can choose ta believe me, er ya can choose ta believe I'm insane. But no matter what ya choose, I'll give ya this promise - I am notta danger ta ya." He nodded toward the door and then looked back to her, eyes locked. "Yer also free ta leave whenever ya want. If ya think ya need ta get 'way from me. An' I won't be offended, I promise."

@frombehindpaleeyes

At her question, he grinned even wider. "They're real," he said. "It's what happened when ya've been sired, when ya become a Livin' Vampire."

He scooted closer to her, his knee touching her leg. "Feel," he said, opening his mouth for her.

"I can tell ya all 'bout Livin' Vampires, if'n ya wanna know?" he gave a light shrug. "Whether ya choose ta believe it er not is up ta you, but I'ma tell ya now - pay attention ta the world 'round ya from now on. Ya've met a supernatural bein' an' been brought inta his world. Yer eyes have been opened, an' so has yer mind, whether er not ya feel it. Yer gonna start seein' more a'the world than ya bargined fer." He gave a smirk and a chuckle.

"So... Livin' Vampire. Feel like hearin' a explanation?"

@frombehindpaleeyes

[literaticat]

Hi! Real question. Not being snarky. Why does it take MONTHS for editor/publishing contracts to be done? What are the agents and editors actually doing?

I mean we'd all love it to be faster. The bottleneck is not generally happening with agents and editors.

Here's how it goes. (Picking numbers absolutely out of thin air, I have no idea what the actual numbers would be and I imagine it varies!):

You have a publishing house, right? In the kids division, let's say there are six imprints, with six to ten editors each. There are new book acquisitions weekly for sure, probably multiple, at each imprint. Let's say 1-2 books gets through acquisitions at each imprint every week, so between 6-12 new books across the board. We'll aim high and assume 12 new books get offers, which some are accepted some are not, and say they end up moving forward with 8 new books per week across these 6 imprints.

First -- before accepting! -- the editor and agent negotiate a deal memo (this is the basic thing that says all the "big picture" terms such as advance, royalties, etc.). Sometimes things have to be approved by the financial folks, etc. Once the deal memo is complete and we have officially accepted the offer, the editor sends all the paperwork to the contracts department. It is now out of both of our hands.

The "contracts department" may consist of like... two people, and an utterly overwhelmed assistant. They are SWAMPED. They are DYING. They are, I have to assume, trapped in windowless cells doing a painstaking job that requires lots of attention to detail and is utterly thankless and probably getting yelled at by assholes all the time. (I'm so sorry, contracts people, I LOVE YOU, and I don't thank you ENOUGH! You should all get raises!)

So each contract takes time to draft. They can be 20, 25, 30 pages long (or longer!). Each agency does have their own "boilerplate" which at least gives them a place to start so they aren't reinventing the wheel every time, but each book deal does have its own terms (as outlined in the Deal Memo) and there are new terms and bits of wording being changed and asked for all the time -- for agencies like mine, with a lot of business at certain publishers, the contracts people and the agents are basically in a constant conversation, making sure that new terms are being carried over properly, etc etc. It's a nit-picky thing, they are comparing multiple contracts with one another at a granular level, it just takes a long time. No I don't know how long - but I know it takes ME hours to even read them, so I would imagine it's at least a solid half-day with no interruptions to draft them.

Once the contract is drafted, it gets sent to the agent, who carefully reads it and makes notes, those notes get sent back to the contracts person, who carefully reads them and responds, there may be a little more back and forth, finally we get a final contract that can be signed.

(This whole process might, in a fast world, take 1-2 weeks, because the agent ALSO has a queue of things and needs a solid half-a-day to do the notes, and when the notes get back to the contracts person, they go into the notes queue, then the agent needs to re-read the final version, etc. But it could for sure take longer than that. I would not be surprised if it took a month just for a normal contract with all the back-and-forth, and if there are significant changes being asked for, it might literally take months as each side has to get lawyers and such involved to make sure the wording makes sense, etc. This is pretty rare but it DOES happen.)

So back to our bottleneck. The big number of editors filter a ton of submissions into 8 books that are moving forward, those 8 books get filtered to 2 contracts people -- each of those contracts people might be able to realistically do, say, 2 draft contracts per week and 2 notes/final contracts per week. One of them went on vacation once, and both of them have had COVID this year, so unfortunately they are always backed up, and can never actually catch up, because there are more coming in every week than they can possibly do and there's already a queue.

So... That's why contracts take so long. Sorry. Everyone is doing their best, I promise.

[beezoobledoodles]

(So this is a genuine review and just general thoughts on Rise! Of The Tmnt because I just wanna rave about it. Also this is being written at 3 am so excuse any incoherentness, also this qll just my personal opinion on the show+movie :3)

Rise Of The Tmnt is ny favorite series to date. (Aside from TOH but that's beside the point.)

I think Rise is a perfect culmination of character,

Section one:

character analysis part 1: Raph

I love raph, he's the best depiction of his own character plus the best older brother I've ever seen ever in any media. He's soft and kind most of the time but very serious when he needs to be, he's very loving and understanding, I love every scene he's in he's just... a delight to have. Also I love alligator snapping turtles and the fact they just made one be the opposite of mean and well angry is a very pleasant surprise especially from his 2012 counter part. Infact Rise!raph is a much more easier set of character design. I genuinely like that he's buff and strong and could crush literally anything and everything but he has just so much care and tenderness that he doesn't.

Raph is literally the definition of "big man big emotions" and the "big emotions" part comes from the fact that he just loves his family, he may be confused at times but I love that he takes time to understand something! Unlike his 2012 counterpart.

His care can be obviously seen when draxum drops Leo off the building roof. Him using his power power saving Leo's life.

2012 raph is just the worst. I'm sure there's....something in him but I didn't find him appealing nor a good character so the departure of the basic teadmilling on brute and abusive that they hashed into 2012 raph from rise is a very pleasant and nice experience.

Rise raph is a the definition of a gentle giant. Like he's so much taller and bugger tha everyone around him! And it's great!!

I have no complaints with rise raph. I love him. I move thats he's just a huge dork. Also that whole bunny episode was just.....actually unsettling. But it slightly unclear if he was either afraid of bunnies or puppets (but that might be me nit picking up on context clues) Conclusion: i like raph and the fact they went with the gentle giant approach and that they made him the eldest and the leader was such a departure. But I think the only real criticism i have is the fact that he's very brash and rushes into things way to fact (but then again so am I so who am I to talk lmao)

Character analysis part 2: Donnie

At first I didn't really have any feelings towards him, at first I didn't really like him but that was baseless cynicism but after finishing the series in its entirety I really enjoy donnie, he's just fun. He's a better version of his original counterparts (including 2012) his baseless cynical optimism can be enjoyed anytime he's screen. Also. I've never seen a character mug for the screen as much as Donnie except gloriosa daisy and lord helmet from spaceballs.

I think Donnie works better in a duo match especially paired up with someone completely opposite like Leo and Mikey.

You can definitely see that he cares even though he's just like an emotionless static man but I think the line of him saying "copper daddy" will never not be funny to me.

Also you can definitely see his genuine care in the episode "Donnies Gifts"

His departure from his 2012 counter part is so much better because he doesn't go along with raphs omnipotent bullshit and infact finds his own solutions before admitting that he was "wrong" but I guess that's his amounted characterization of "burnt out gifted kid who wants tk hear his father's proud of him just once" he's not a liability or stubborn (or more stubborn) as his 2012 counter part.

My only real complaint is that they didn't make more dock ock references. They had perfect opportunities.. (other than it being set in new york) he has the octo pack and the metal claws I don't see how they COULDNT make a dock ock reference. But I do enjoy donnie.

Note: do not give him uranium.

Character analysis part 3: Leo

Leo is a much different story, he's not as gritty or serious as his 2012 counter part. Infact his counterpart took to seriously and was part of the trope of tragic leader (in slight defense he was given leader trauma at a young age that's not his fault) but rise Leo just. He's just the most.

I like that he doesn't take things as seriously as he should just makes for an even funnier scenario. The fact that dan(if im correct, someone can correct me on this later) voices him is just fucking amazing.

Leo is just hilarious in every scene he's in (Also I forgot to mention this hyt the fact that everyone is in agreement, my self included that Donnie and leo are both twins is just also funny in its own right)

But like raph, leo can handle serious situations when he needs to and his acceptance of near death in the movie is just really fucking sad, it definitely made me feel an emotion I didn't expect.

I admire the fact that he's a baseless idiot with little to no self regard is just kinda funny especially in episodes like shell in the cell.

Leo isn't exactly my favorite but I do enjoy him when he's on screen.

Character analysis part 4: Mikey

Question. Is it infantilization if I call an autistic 12 year old cute? I mean that in a grandma pinching your cheeks and gives you cookies type way.

Rise mikey is such a refreshing Harbour of characterization. He's just a ball of fun I love him! He's qlso quite literally the baby of the family. And rightfully so. Im surprised they didn't do more with him.

Frankly I think mikey is the only one with less screen time than the other three, his relationship with raph and Donnie is drastically so much better.

Considering his relationship with raph in the past ((2012)) has not been the best I'm glad they didn't bring that whole mess back.

I found rise mikey so much more enjoyable to be on screen and to experience. His technical and literal "child like demeanor" is just overall really adorable and i just wanna hold him! I mean LOOK AT HIM!!

Also his dynamic with raph is so wholesome and healthy and I wish they'd show more of their dynamic.

His and donnies dynamic is refreshing in hindsight especially everytime Donnie calls him "micheal" is just such a sibling thing.

Mikeys soft orange color is so nice on the eye it makes him stand out better from the others

(that was also the other problem from his 2012 counter part was that 2012 Mikey was also smaller than his brothers but he was also kinda...bland...there was so much more that they could've done with him but he was ultimately treated with the side carred "annoying little brother" routine they shoved down into private from penguins, I wouldn't be surprised if thetook inspiration for him and raphs relationship from private and skippers abusive relationship considering they came out the same time but that's beside the point)

Rise mikey has just so much more to him, his care for his family, his artistic approach, the fact that he has a very decorative undershell (the stickers? He has) are a very nice pigment to his character (very simple but recognizable) his scene in the hidden city and the line "he made me, he made us" just hit so hard especially for being the youngest in his family, he doesn't understand as he and is almost but not completely absent minded, i think the closest thing to "absent minded" he comes tk is in the library episode but that's just that one episode.

He's just ultimately trying his best sometimes forgetting he's not exactly the only one in the room just makes for a fun time.

Also his almost self sacrifice in the movie was heart breaking. He just wanted to save his older brother! His panic and genuine fear when he and Donnie were stuck in the tank was just.... ouch. It heart..

Also this scene

He's just so tiny.

Anyway. I like Mikey. I just wanna hold him and give him head Pat's.

Character analysis part 5: April O' neil

I love april. She's just so much.

I love her over exuberant energy, the fact that she's ready to just beat ass at any moment is hilarious.

Her dynamic with the turtles is just so wholesome. She's a wonderful character, she felt almost perfect she's not a complete disaster and she doesn't have the creepy thing between her and Donnie (*cough*2012*cough cough*) she's just her own character and i love her. I have nothing else to add. I have no real criticism of April. Only the fact that she's better in every way compared to every April that came before her.

Character analysis part 6: Splinter

So. It's time to talk about Splinter.

Honestly.... my first time seeing Splinter I never really thought of him, I thought his reveal as Lou jitzu was hilarious but it similarities on being a yoshi hamato was nice knowing he had some relevancy to rises story.

While Splinter isn't exactly the "Best" character, he's a very...interesting character and i like the silly rat man.

That's the thing, Splinter doesn't exactly HAVE TO BE serious and gritty all the time. I like rise Splinter for the fact that he is silly and goofy, he acts like a dad on a sugar crash and it's great.

He's paced like uncle Iroh if he were written like season 8 Celestia just without the basic wise cracks and advice (I mean unless you count the end of season 1 and the entirety of season 2)

Splinter was just... I liked him he was funny.

Character analysis part 7:

Casey Jones jr.

I like hi. He was great axpostion for the movie, his trauma of the dystopia ruined city of "new york" 2077 when the kraang took over is very evident and his joy of actual food is just very heartwarming.

I definitely prefer rise Casey Jones over any of his counterparts becomes he's not an inclosed asshole. Also the whole reveal of his line at the end of the movie of "THATS MY MINE" sent me laughing.

(Also before we get to the next segment I wanna mention I like Todd. He's funny and hilarious, I love his friendship with mikey i loved Todd's introduction he was just so funny.)

Segment 2:

Villian analysis part 1: Rupert Swaggart

They just made a more Cockney Cocky gordan Ramsey but some how made him worse, he wasn't a bad villian he was.....just....ehh I didn't hate nor enjoy him... they could've done more with him but what that more is I don't exactly entirely know... I found his design okay?... there's not much to add with meatsweats. (I'm starting out in "order" so now starting with the villians with the least impact)

Villian analysis part 2: Repo mantis

He's a repo man. I found him hilarious nit as hilarious as the others but hilarious nonetheless. Nothing more to add.

Villian analysis part 3: hypno-potomus:

Hypno was the more fun villian, he was definitely more of a villian than anyone else, going as far as to almost KILL the turtles is his dabue episode. *shrugs* I enjoyed him on screen.

Villian analysis part 4: the foot clan

They weren't reall. Villians, they were just doing what they were told to do since their clan was first made to do in the first place, that was made very clear especially in the movie.

Villian analysis part 5: Baron Draxum.

I love draxum!! I will shout it from the rooftops. I love draxum as a villian (even though that's a barely qualifiable contender) and I loved him even more as a redemptive scouling father figure. Especially so more than season two.

But draxum is just one ham and cheese sandwhich!! He's like discord but less chaos and more just CHEESE! ALSO! he's got deer feet. And i love that for him.

I love his relationship with Splinter and their "rivalery" he's just fun. Also his hesitant human acceptance is funny especially when interacting with April.

Also he has zero hesitation in his body.

Villian analysis part 6: The Kraang

oh ew oh God. What the fuck?! God their gross but I guess they have to be right? Compared to their 2012 counterparts. They look even more alien like. Just..more disgusting.

Also the scene where they just kinda pull an RE7 and fucking mold raphs body is so fucking disgusting but also really cool. I'm surprised they didn't manipulate his strength. But Also I HATE the kraang with a burning passion. Jesus Christ.

But they did what they were supposed to do. They were there to take over earth, the took over the basic empire state building. Traumatized three children made raph pull and Ethan winters while also traumatizing their best friend(s) and father figures while also being fucking evil and loving every single second of it.

The kraang were by definition: narmy as fuck and I loved it. But also fuck the kraang I hate them.

On a side note CASSANDRA IS THE FUCKING MOST AND I LOVE HER!!!

Overall I think Rise might be the beat adaptation of the tmnt story by far. I mean like unless something equally if not better comes along but we'll see. Next time I'll do a full review of 2012 since I still have a bone to pick but overall I enjoyed rise.

20/10 will watch. maybe I'll do a 10 words or less review later. Anyway goodnight hope you enjoyed my senseless ranting I'm gonna pass out now.

[hoseokslefteyebrow]

“ Don't worry, you're safe now.” || Homicidal Lui

Pairing : Yandere! Homicidal Lui X Reader

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Yandere

Summary : In which insane meets broken.

Wordcount: 2k lol

WARNINGS : Yandere ;), someone dies but it's not very gore or sum, he's already insane, but in here he loses even more sanity, abusive household.

Headcanon

Aight so to start it off, you didn't know Lui before he developed Sully

Or knew him in general, that you didn't either

You met Lui in a very odd way.

You met him at the drugstore, simply because you needed toothpaste and he needed whatever.

At this moment Lui was Lui, not Sully who tended to take over control more than what was supposed to.

You had accidentally bumped into him  in one of the aisles, and unlike most people who'd stop to stare at his face, you simply apologized and went on with your life.

This of course is the most normal action for basically every humane person, but for someone who was looked down upon due to his facial features and his silence, it was the start of something.. 

That might be growing into one big disease.

How Sully met you was in the most stereotypical way, he had simply come to kill you, not knowing who you are.

Sully had never been very picky on who to kill, he simply broke in, outed his frustration, and left.

That was the original plan with you too, at least for Sully's part.

Until he was straddling you, knife pressed to your throat, and realized you were actually very much awake.

You weren't screaming at him to get off, yet he could see the fear in your eyes.

Maybe it was because his hand was on your mouth, and so he decided to play a little.

And so took his hand off, yet you still didn't scream.

After a moment of doing nothing, he sat back, rather calmly, placing his full weight on your body and looked at you curiously.

Much to his confusion, you didn't really react, just keeping eye contact, fear filling up your irises even more

" Ar- aren't you g-going to kill, me?" You ask him in a shaking voice, unable to keep yourself from stuttering.

By the sound of your voice, Sully switches forcefully into Lui, and you can only watch in fear and confusion what's happening around you.

Because it does look rather terrifying, a man first sneaks into your house, and is suddenly at you with a blade in your neck, and as you speak, he throws himself off you, and is now holding his head in his hands, blade fallen to the ground with a loud sound.

You flinch as the unknown male to you also drops to the ground, mumbling to himself.

The sound of his knees hitting the ground must've been loud, because soon after the hallway lamp is turned on, and you hear the sound of footsteps approaching.

And then you're shaking Lui, and you're telling him to hurry up and leave, apologizing along with it.

By the sound of even more in your stuttering voice, even Sully becomes quiet.

And so Lui actually takes the moment to study you.

Now with the dull light from the hallway, you appear to be injured.

He's not sure how bad it is, but there's blue and purple spots dancing all over your skin.

Underneath your thin white shirt, he can even spot a very nasty black one, and suddenly he spots the scars on your arms too.

He's brought back to the scene in front of him when your voice has turned into panic as someone tries to open the door to your room.

He doesn't even process what he's doing before he's pushing his knife, which he had picked up from the ground, into your hands.

" You need it more than us."

And then he's gone, trough the window into the streets.

You flinch when your father opens the door, knowing what you're in for.

He returns to your room the next night, not sure as to why himself.

He's left disappointed when your room is empty, tough his knife, which he had left behind, is clean and on the pillow, on top of a paper.

Upon picking it up, he realizes it's a note.

' I'm not sure if you'll ever come back, but here's the knife you left behind, you told me I'd need it, but I really don't.' 

He looks around the room, spotting a pen in the corner on the ground, and decides to write you back.

' what's your name?'

The next night he returns again, hoping he'd get an answer.

Instead, he's met by an empty bedroom once again.

He doesn't know why, or how, but for the first time in a while, he feels disappointment spread in his chest

Due to Lui feeling a little down, Sully's easily able to take over, and he walks them into the forest.

Sully doesn't know why either, but suddenly he's in a part of the forest they're not familiar with.

And then he hears the sound of a twig breaking behind him, and he's turning around.

He's shocked to find you standing there.

He can see the fear in your eyes, but is surprised to see that there's less of it than last time he saw you.

Your posture is also relaxed, and then he realizes, you're not afraid of him.

He's not sure on how to feel by that.

" My name's Y/N." You tell him dryly.

He's blinking, not sure what you mean, before he's stumbling again, switching back to Lui by the sound of your voice.

" I'm- I'm Lui, he was Sully." Lui stutters.

You turn your head at him in curiosity.

" He? Is there a voice in your head?" You ask him, tough it doesn't sound like you're mocking him, simply asking him a question.

" Ah, no. I have a split persona." He tells you, somewhat awkwardly.

" What's that like?" You ask him.

By that simple question alone, you've made him feel human, like a guy his age.

Sully doesn't like it one bit, this feeling you're giving the both of them.

The three of you end up meeting near the forest for the next few weeks.

Over those weeks, Lui and Sully get to know you better.

And get to know Lui too, tough Sully keeps himself shadowed.

He's always in the back of Lui's mind, of course, whenever you're around, Lui feels like Sully's just, closer.

He doesn't know why, and he's worried about that.

It's not until you don't show up unannounced like usual, that Sully makes an appearance again.

She might not want to see us today, Sully, maybe we should give her space. Lui tells his other persona.

She's ours, Lui, can't you see that? And we can just call it a visit, she can tell us off if she wants. Sully tells Lui, who's still not into the idea.

We're going. And with that he takes control.

Once they arrive, Sully's happy to have taken control over the situation.

The moment he hears your voice he freezes.

The sound of it isn't melodic and relaxed, instead, it's trembling and weak.

Sully doesn't like it.

He originally didn't plan  to intervene, but when the sound of something breaking reaches his ears, he's quick to check it out.

The scene in that greets him makes the already burning fire rage on even worse.

Because a few meters away from him, at the other end of the hallway is where you are cowering in front of an older man, who's got a broken bottle in his hand, glass shards around the two of you, and your arms in front of you to protect you from, what must've been, the blow which the whiskey bottle had given you.

Sully's not the only one who's seeing red.

Kill him. 

It's Lui who's giving out the command this time, to end this man's life.

But then you see him and you're quick to run to him and pull him away from the scene.

Sully blushes at the contact your skin makes with his.

" I'm sorry you had to see that. Are you okay?" You ask him tenderly.

He blinks at you.

You were the one who received the blow, there's a thin trail of blood trailing down your arm, and you're standing in shorts in cold weather, yet you're asking him if he's okay?¿

" Who was that fucker?" He asks instead, not even bothered to ask if you're okay.

Because he knows, no matter what your answer is, you're not.

" My father. But, it's not his fault. He- he was drunk." You tell him softly, truly not meaning your abusive father any harm.

" Tch." Sully doesn't even say anything before he shrugs his jacket off and unceremoniously dumps it on top of your head.

" Wear it. It's cold." He tells you, acting like some kind of low budget tsundere.

" So you're Sully?" You ask him.

That catches him off guard.

" How did someone as dumb as you know?"  He asks you.

" I'm not dumb. And Lui usually blushes a lot more." You tell him, putting his jacket on.

Sully's lowkey impressed by the answer, and your attitude.

And so you finally get to know him too.

It takes a lot of convincing, but at the end of the day, your father lives.

Over the next few days, you grow even closer with the two of them.

And subconsciously, Sully becomes a little too fond of you.

It's during the daytime one day when Sully and Lui talk about this feeling both of them have for you.

It doesn't take a long conversation, and they decide to confess to you that night.

However, they're left disappointed, and angry, as you turn them down.

Lui thinks it's because of his scars, while Sully thinks you're feeling too bound down by your father.

The real reason ( and the one you've told them) is that it's because you simply don't like him that way.

The next few nights they don't show up, which leaves you disappointed.

You're not aware of the big, bloody mess you've created.

After a few toughs , Sully comes with a suggestion to make an end to your misery, and to free you from your father's abusive hold, permanently.

Lui is at first against this, after all, you did tell him to not do that, but after some persuasion of Sully, he's in too.

That night, they show up at your house, greeting you by stepping in trough the window.

You're not the first house they're 'visiting' that night, and so you start to cry when you see him all bloodied up, sharp eyes telling you that he's nit here for a visit.

Your first tough is that he's come to kill you, because you turned him down of course.

However, as he spots the tears escaping your eyes, he's quick to come to your side and hush you.

" Don't worry sweetheart, we've come to free you."

And then he's walking into the hallway, and moving to another room.

You're quick to understand his intentions.

He's come to kill your father.

The first two rooms he checks out are a fail, one being the bathroom and one being a study.

However, Sully is annoyed when you stand in his way, trying to avoid his kill.

You're a little stronger than you look, and manage to keep him off the other male in the room for a while.

While Sully initially did not want to hurt you, he decides against his own decisions, and knocks you out with the hilt of his knife.

You hear him mutter something along the lines of " Don't worry, I'll take good care of you." 

When you wake up again, you're placed on an uncommon bed, Lui, or Sully, at your side, softly looking over you with a crazed look in their eyes and a sickly sweet smile.

" Don't worry, we're safe now."

A/N: Tell me what you think about this writing style, and what I can write better ;). Also, Creepypasta requests are still open.

[heartshards]

Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't the broadway version basically the first Frozen film, so essentially connected to the second one as well? So shouldn't you be using a faceclaim who's Sami?

god I've literally been back for less than 24hrs

ahem. so yes, the musical is more-or-less the first film expanded upon. and yes, Frozen 2 does confirm Anna & Elsa are half-Northuldran on their mother's side. and yes, Walt Disney Studios has confirmed the Northuldra, the indigenous population trapped by the mist in the enchanted forest, are partially based on Norway's Sami people.

now I'd like to point out a few things.

first, I have been writing Elsa since 2013, when the first movie came out. I have used Lily James as a secondary/modern/as-needed faceclaim since that time. second, I situate Arendelle in modern/"real-world" verses in Denmark, since Frozen is based on The Snow Queen by Hans Christian Andersen, a Danish author. third, and I cannot stress this enough, Arendelle and the Northuldra are fictitious, they are not exact representations of any one indigenous population, rather, as the studio has said, they can represent the subjugation of many different indigenous persons across Europe and North America. using any one particular indigenous actress might come close, but nothing would be 100% accurate to a people that was invented for animation. they are not, for example, absolutely based on real Columbian people like the characters of Encanto.

yes, Elsa is half-Danish and half-Northuldran, but she's also not entirely human at all – she is a spirit gifted to Arendelle in somewhat human form. if we want to get into the nitty-gritty of genetics, she wouldn't have blonde hair with her parents. it's scientifically impossible.

now I want to be clear I'm not trying use ~magic~ as an excuse to whitewash. I just think it's a bit odd to have someone jump in my inbox not 24 hours after I come back to writing Elsa and point out a faceclaim I barely even use. 90% of my icons are icons of the various musical actresses from bootlegs of the show. I only chose Lily back in the day because I felt she had the right expressions/mannerisms/costumes for Elsa. no, she isn't Danish, but as someone of white European descent, I wouldn't care if a British person played me when I'm technically Dutch. I will say straight out I am not of indigenous descent, so I won't speak for any such community, but I am also aware actresses that are half-Sami are pretty few and far between. if someone wants to suggest one to me that might work for Elsa, I am very open to it! but I want to circle this back to the fact that I really don't use icons super often anymore anyway. half my partners are iconless so I am moving more in that direction.

also, just as an aside, actresses of several different races and ethnicities have played Elsa and Anna and their parents in the musical, because it is a fictional, magical world. yes, based on the real one, but nonetheless, having a black Elsa or Anna or a Filipino Anna or a Japanese Elsa (all of which we have had in the stage show) hasn't undermined the story.

I would never claim Elsa's connection to the Northuldra is anything other than very important to her character, but I think nit-picking this element of my blog I don't even use often feels to me a bit more performative than actually helpful, especially when sent as an anon and not approaching as an actual conversation. I am always available via DM if you'd like to chat, though.

[syubub]

Yoongi birthday reading/energy check!!

It's sweet sweet tangerine bois birthday!!

I wanted to do a cute little energy check up to see what's up and ask some fun little questions!!

I'm excited so let's just do this shit!!

Disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes and not to be taken as fact!!

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I want to apologize for the absolute shit pictures but what's new lol

So, let's start with the platform. First thing I noticed was the blue was brighter but the platform was darker? It was like someone cranked up the contrast to 100. Ngl it looked pretty cool. Yoongis platform doesn't typically have a barrier like some of the others do so I just kinda walked in and did the whole, "happy birthday, I have questions" His energy seemed a lot more... vibrant? And playful I guess? It was really nice. Now. The actual connection was intresting because the cord was blue again and like, real thick. (I don't think my perceived thickness of the cord has and real correlation with how strong the connection is. It was just thicc) this time though, the cord was connected at the chest instead of the third eye. So i was like, ??? But my guide didn't give my any sort of helpful input (my guide likes to watch me suffer in my confusion. I'm sure of it)

Anyway, cord like that and then yoobi gave me a headbutt to connect at the third eye. Idk why he gotta be like that :( istg next time he's gonna flick my forehead or something.

I was like "cool cool cool. I want to do the reading now pls" and idk how to explain the energy other than sassy. You know? Blah blah blah I'm thinking, "I don't remember him being so cheeky but maybe I've been gone long enough for him to level up into his final sass monster form"

Anywho, this was intresting because after the little strings were connected and stuff, we plopped down on the floor. And it was like everything I was doing irl was being mimicked infront of yoons energy? So we were sitting facing eachother and I was putting the cards down between us?? Usually that doesn't happen but it was kinda fun!!

Moving right along. I first asked if there was anything he wanted to say or needed to get across and it was 11. Now, 11 has come up before and I'm still not to sure what it's in reference to? My best guess is possibly he's been seeing 11:11 or that it's 2? Idk let me know if you have any clues lol. Other stuff was just kinda banter and stuff.

So so so.

The reading. First thing I asked was how he was doing. And I shuffled his preticular way (when I ask a question I always ask for the energy to tell me how much to shuffle or when to stop. For yoongi it's always 2-2-2. So 2 bridge shuffles, 2 hand shuffles and then split the pile in 2. That's why I think 11 might be 2 to him?)

The cards we got are ace of swords rev, justice,the heirophant rev, the empress.

So based off this I was like okay. I want to pull clarity cards for the two rev cards to get a better picture so I pulled the emperor rev for ace or swords rev and strength rev and wheel of fortune rev for the heirophant rev.

Starting with the ace of swords rev, and the emperor reverse. It seems like yoongi has been re thinking his relationship to control in his life. That's he's possibly noticing any unhealthy needs to control his life and the situation around him. It could also refer to his judgment being clouded by a rigid approach.

With the justice card it makes me think that he's possibly considering a big choice in his life or that he's really doing some deconstructing of his own views. This second idea fits in well with him getting clarity on some possibly unhealthy control issues in his life.

Now. The heirophant rev, strength rev and wheel of fortune reverse. This was intresting to me bc they are all major arcana. The heirophant rev can really talk about no longer needing outside approval and making your own way in your own time bc you are your own teacher. Strength in rev I kinda read as self doubt and feeling down in this case. Like a lack of confidence in himself and his abilities. And the wheel of fortune in reverse I took to mean as his breaking cycles. All together these cards kinda paint a picture about wanting and trying to break a cycle of self doubt and self limiting beliefs and learning more about himself and why he think what he does about himself and searching through everything for truth. It's really good!! In short he's doing some nice soul searching and trusting himself to guide his own way through this self discovery!

The empress! This card seems to pop up for yoobi a lot and I think it really speaks to the abundance that surrounds him! Not just money but the abundance of creativity, love, friends ect.

Now now now. I asked him if there was anything that he wanted to tell us about himself or bts or what's happening in the near future. For that I got 2 of cups, king of wands and 3 of coins.

So the 2 of cups is partnership. Usually romantic. Could be pertaining to the may 13th thing that is ever present lol but I'll get to that later. With the 3 of coins talking about teamwork, this could definitely hint at collaborations coming up!! That's the vibe I get. No one crush my dreams. And for the king of wands it could be talking about taking the reigns on a new project and starting to get it done. Like a new opportunity. This could be a new bts project like starting a new campaign or new venture or maybe personal like the a mixtape or doing more songs for other groups ect.

I had to ask him how he was feeling about the grammys. I had to. Had to. The cards were ace of wands, 2 of wands and death reverse. When these came flying out I could help but smile. Yoongis energy was almost giddy too!

Witht he ace of wands

It's that spark of creativity and inspiration. It's that feeling when you get super excited over some new thing. I think this is the perfect example for feeling reinvigorated. The 2 of wands takes that spark from the ace and tries to funnel that excitement and newness into something directional. Using that burst of creativity to start planning for future progress!! Its so nice to see that! If they don't win (IF) you bet we're gonna get some bangers about a corrupt system. If (WHEN) they do win we'll get bangers about how thankful they are to have gotten where they are in spite of a corrupt system. I just want to hear an uncensored version of yoongi being like, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WE DID IT BITCHES. FUCK ALL YOU BASTARDS THAT SAID WE COULDN'T."

I can dream....

What a nice dream.

Now I asked if there was anything yoobi wanted to say to us as in advice or comfort or anything like that and I got, Clearing negativity, make time for self care, when I'm tuned into the energy of abundance I become abundant. when I'm in a state of appreciation im in vibrational alignment with my true love nature. The world rev, 2 of swords rev and that project, that person, that idea is waiting.

Awe. Take care of yourselves!! Make sure to take time to enjoy what you like and try not to let any negativity get in the way of you enjoying your days. The world rev to me seems to be talking about seeking closure on the things in your life that have been impacting you. Tie up those loose ends so you can move foward without triping over yourself and 2 of swords rev I think talks about information overload and being kinda indecisive bc of that. Take a sep back to evaluate the situation at hand because sometimes it's so close you can't see what you're looking for. Those of you who are studying and getting frustrated because you just can't seem to get it, try taking a step back and doing something to take care of yourself and come back to it so you can approach with a clearer mind. Try not to get stuck or paralyzed by choice but if you do get stuck, take some time to detach yourself from the situation and come back later!

A fair few people wanted an update on yoobis soulmate as well. If you need a refresher here's the run down. Yoongis soulmate is impossible for me to read, yoongi is a smug ass and I'm nosy and probably a little dumb.

Now that that's cleared up

I asked, "am I missing something?" (As to why I can't connect and why yoongi won't give me answers.)

I got queen of cups, magician and the high priestess. I read this as him being like, "yeah dude, you aren't woke enough"

YOONGI just give me answers pls. The high priestess is intuition and sacred knowledge, the magician is manifestation and the queen of cups is also intuition.

At this point I was like, okay you little shit, can you at least tell me how your soulmate is doing? Can you do that for me?

2 of cups, 2 of pentacles, 9 of wands and knight of wands. 2 of cups is partnership usually romantic, 2 of pentacles is priorities and managing them, 9 of wands persistence, knight of wands motivation for a new thing. His soulmate last time was in the process of going through some shit and figuring it out and it seems like now they've got a better clue of how to move foward and are currently heading towards good things/ important things in their life (possibly like working towards dream career or had an idea for a business the want to start or field they want to go in.)

I was thinking about the next question when this popped into my head, "if you know about your akashic book, do you know about your soulmates? Have you read it?" I used my pendulum. No movement at all. What so ever. "Are you listening to me?" Yes. "So answer my question please" No. "Do you like to watch me suffer?" Maybe. "Do you know the answer to the question" yes.

YOONGI WHY

This cheeky son of a bitch.

Now I was like, fuck it. Imma ask him the big boi question.

"Is your soulmate present when I do these readings?" Yes.

WHY THE FUCK CAN I NIT PICK UP ON IT???

I had to take a deep breath dude. Yoobi is testing my nerves.

"Are they hiding their energy?" No.

I was actually gonna combust. This makes no sense.

I asked yoongi if he would tell me what I'm not getting. Silence. So i ask my guide.

"lol ur dumb"

Watch me Google "how to fire your spirit guide"

Istg this feels like some dumb prank. Maybe I'm just genuinely oblivious to his soulmates energy or maybe I'm just doing something.

What do you want to bet that his soulmate is just hiding under the platform and I'm too stupid to notice or some dumb thing like that.

yoobi, sir, why must you do this?

I decided to continue.

"What message or thing have you learned from your soulmate recently that could be valuable to us?" I got healthy communication in relationships and deep replenishment.

Good to know you can have a nice communicative relationship with your soulmate bc I CAN'T.

I'm petty about it, sue me.

The message does stand though. Good communication and taking proper rest to replenish yourself.

Now I had to ask yoongi directly what he thought of may 13th.

I got the lovers, 7 of swords, the magician and judgement. The seven of swords was intresting and it makes me think there's some extra stuff at play here too. 7 of swords is about getting away with something and deceit. The clarifier was the magician.... this could mean a lot honestly. It could be that maybe yoongi will have his relationship exposed or possibly that maybe him and his soulmate meet but yoongi is disguised? Idk how that would work at all but I'm stumped. There's a lot of variations that this could be. The magician is about manifesting and having everything you need to create what you want. This could possibly mean that maybe he gets a sudden idea that's like, "oh I have to go here right now. Its super important" eventhough he has practice scheduled. So that would let down his team but he would be following his path and it might lead to him meeting his soulmate? Maybe vice versa? Idk let me know what you think??

With the judgement its about inner calling and kinda like the peak. Like shit has been leading up to this moment. With the lovers too it does seem like a union?

I asked him, "but like what's gonna happen on the 13th thought and I got the 10 of cups. Divine love, bliss, alignment, happy mushy gushy shit. This is why I'm so inclined to think that they'll meet on the 13th or things will get serious or their paths finally cross. The cards seem to heavily suggest that.

My dude. Yoongi is really sappy, pass it on.

For the last question I asked yoomgi if there was messages/ advice he had given to his soulmate that we might benefit from.

First step, open your third eye, open your heart, sign from heaven, open your arms to receiving.

A lot of opening lol.

It's good advice though learning to be open and receptive and taking that first step in tackling life or any situation.

Oki. Now for the disconnecting. It was not nearly as strange as it has been in the past. I was just like thanks dude. Again, happy birthday blah blah and I got up to leave. I noticed it looked like we were in sitting in one of those old plastic hoola hoops? Like the pink and yellow ones lol. As I was looking at and and like??? Off to the side the numbers 13, 28, 54. Obvi 54 isn't a date and then I the last yoongi check up there was book pages and I feel like 54 and 28 were the pages?? I'm not actually sure as I'm writing this so I'm gonna check.

Yep I checked. They are the page #s.

So that's intresting.

Other than that though I just kinda left and he was like, "bye" and that's all.

Not as cool as other yoongi adventures but equally as frustrating.

TLDR

Yoongis doing pretty okay and he's a cheeky little shit. My guide like to watch me suffer and yoobi is mushy gushy squishy.

Happy day of birth Syub!!