#i'm making a character list in my head
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I'm not saying a Last of Us/RE7/8 AU would be a good idea.
I'm just saying I think Mia and Eveline should have an actual bond and happen to be fixating on The Last of Us again. (And also the Mold causing a world wide apocalypse is just an interesting idea)
#i'm making a character list in my head#rose would be sarah (duh)#Zoe could be tess and ethan could be tommy (or the other way around)#miranda is marlene#alcina is definitely cannibal dude#DONNA AND ANGIE COULD BE SAM AND HIS BROTHER#karl is bill#i don't have a place for the girls or sal yet#my art#stupid aus
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I'm so sad that when you start officially dating a character in bg3 there are no changes to the sleeping arrangements, are you telling me you wouldn't want to sleep every night snuggled up with your loved one??? I want a cuddles mod
#personal#bg3#baldur's gate 3#we need to make a petition for characters in a relationship to sleep cuddled together#and if you date more than one character before going to bed you get to choose who to cuddle for the night#it's criminal that we don't have that opportunity#I want to make my silly little characters in love be all lovey-dovey and sleep hugging each other#I can just imagine BloodWeave sleeping all cuddled up with Astarion keeping his head on Gale's chest to hear his beating heart#his very own most perfect lullaby#sigh I'm gonna add a cuddles mod to the list of mods I'll probably never be able to play right under my hopes for a Durgetash mod
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Something something Decepticon recruitment (+physical exam) yada yada putting my Malay twins headcanon to good use and making names (and a non-typical matrilineal last name as opposed to a patrilineal last name) for them :P
Old fanfiction as well as echo chambering myself I have got some headcanons in my mind that do not make surface level sense but have Syakir and Darwesh bin Kalsom!
#skyquake#tfp skyquake#dreadwing#tfp dreadwing#transformers#tfp#humanformers#fanart#look look look- i used [western] sources for names because i'm in [english majority country] and maybe can't get a good list of names#especially not knowing whether they're authentic or not :P any malaysian folk in the chat do forgive me#eitherway- i did at least try to find what the sources claimed the origins of the names were#from my understanding syakir is the malay (and indonesian) form of arabic and urdu shakir (which means thankful but i that didn't matter)#darwesh is the hindi version of darwish which is an old persian but also malay name that i actively chose to make hindi#(because i wanted to hear how it was pronounced but since i didn't have the script version the only way i could hear it was the hindi way)#and kalsom for a character that only exists in my head is the malay and urdu form of the arabic kulthum meaning full-cheeked/beautiful#again- my outsider understanding of the names mostly as a way to kinda brute force the terms skyquake and dreadwing into malay forms#it was really funny looking for dreadwing's human name a lot of them that i could find ended up being versions of david haha#one of them was i think dawoud (which i think was muslim)#it did make me shudder that if dreadwing anglicized his name he'd be david so i hopped the train to darwish/darwesh#which is more technically darvesh give or take dialects so no wumbo here#which btw skyquake ends up being right about the callsigns- human dreadwing hates that his callsign is DREAD wing- skyquake loves his tho :
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I got tagged by @curiouslavellan and @calicostorms, thank you you two :D:D Couldn't help but use all the available options bc. Women <3
Tagging @formerlyknownas-delight @void-whisper @chimney-begins @livingchancy @rzepi
@jadeandquartzes @theatricuddles and whoever else wants to do it :D
#moss rambles#me listen all the 5937593758953 female characters i love in my head rn bc i'm normal about making lists
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Did somebody ask for adventure forward head canons that may or may not interfere with the actual canon because I haven't played the games in a while?
No? Screw you, you're getting them anyway.
Warning ⚠️ I am cringe, but I am free so I feel like that makes up for it.
VERY LONG LIKE INCREDIBLY LONG YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED DO NOT CLICK THAT SEE MORE BUTTON UNLESS YOU WANT TO READ ADVENTURE FORWARD HEAD CANNONS YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
Also I say head cannons but like halfway through I derail into my AU of what crown of shadows and vein reveal would be like so I still think it's really interesting but I'm very biased.
("I hate celesteal!" I say, before making a bunch of head cannons around him.) I really like celesteal as a character I hate him as a person but I really love him as a character
Do not expect this to be arranged well it will not be. This is not chronological this is not even like grouping a character altogether this is really messy, I'm just getting all my ideas out.
The two different canceled sequels are both different timelines (that I may or may not make crossover in my head) and I have different ideas for how each of them would go so I will refer to them as crown of shadows (COS) and Vain revival (VR) to specify when it is only for one of the versions.
Anshine and Stratosfear are happily married.
I don't know if this is cannon or not but Sheldon definitely made Miobot. And also accidentally made him sentient, oops, sure hope that doesn't come back causing both of you to get forcefully ascended to a higher existence.
Celesteal admire humans a lot mostly because he can't figure out where they keep coming from (he does not know how reproduction works) and he can't figure out how to make one.
VR! The shard saver is his closest attempt to a human looking mostly correct but having the little quirk of her having pink blood and also thinking it is normal for a person to not remember the first 15 years of their life (She does not know she is not human at first) The shard savior is also the only one of his creations that he considers to be his child.
It took Celesteal a couple hundred years to figure out how to make a sentient being at that point he was kind of already cuckoo bananas.
Yawgate was one of his earlier creations and often accompanied him to where he needed to go because Yawgate does the portaling.
The pure points did not learn how to speak English properly they were just imbued with that knowledge shortly after they were made. Unfortunately they are all British because of this. (Celesteal thinks that accent is the most quote on quote "cool" and therefore he speaks in it)
Celesteal refers to everyone using they/them most of the time because he does not know how genders work at all.
The first Star Savior is a 39-year-old closeted gay man named Stefan. (I accidentally stole that name from a fanfiction like 2 years ago, oops)
Mason is a 40-year-old and is also a closeted gay man. The main reason he became the mayor is because his father was the mayor and his father is now dead. The hat wears is his father's. He is also really tired of the may or may not jokes, yes he has heard it before it lost its funny factor since he was a child and heard it from people saying that to his father. Stefan doesn't think it's lost it's funny factor and still makes those jokes.
Mason and Stefan are childhood best friends and may or may not (Haha get it) have feelings for each other. Unfortunately, that issue won't be resolved for another 300 years. (Talk about a slow burn)
The second Star savior is a 28-year-old man named Nicholas (I also stole that name from the same fanfiction I read 2 years ago accidentally, oops) who has served in the military. His only remaining family members are his aunt, who he has a rough relationship with and his cousin who he has a fine relationship with, but he hasn't talked to since before he joined the military.
Anshine is really bad at naming things like "if he had a Dalmatian he would name it spot" type of bad at naming things.
Stratosfear for a brief period of time forgot his own strength because he didn't really have to do stuff like opening jars when he had to play the role of the star steeler and he's kind of been trapped for 300 years so not a lot of time to get used to how strong you are with objects and stuff.
Stratosfear is immune to poison and venom because he himself can make poisonous stuff if he really wanted to. He can also make red metal into any shape he wants, he just thinks scorpions are cool and so has a bunch of metal shapes in the shape of the scorpion tail, that is one of the very few things he got to choose for himself in that time loop.
Evon has somehow managed to in all her years of being a cashier, which is two, meet every single pre-point and not realize it. Evon goes by Eve. Whett is Eve's boss. Whett and Randall are friends.
Eve lives with her roommate Rose who has very obvious feelings for her and Eve is oblivious. (Would really be a shame if something were to happen to Eve which caused Rose to never be able to properly tell her her feelings, ha. On a completely unrelated note Rose is actually one of Nick's ancestors so maybe that's a good thing because he literally wouldn't exist if they were together oops. This just in, woman (me) who can't handle tragedy made another tragedy.)
Umbra may or may not be in a cult?? It's really unclear to an outsider if it's a cult or just a really dedicated group of people to studying the Moon. She does have powers from this because I think that's cool.
If Cynosura had a nickel for every time he has been brutally transformed he would have two nickels which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice.
He got cursed by a weird gem thing that was in his backyard when he was like twelve. Given the fact that he's already cursed he can't be cursed again so he goes out looking for those items to stop anyone else from being cursed. (Yes, he has ice powers I thought it would be cool for his pre point to also have them, shut up.)
Cynosura and Umbra used to be friends before Cynosura's cursing and then became penpals because they couldn't see each other in person they recently have started talking in person again. I feel it is important to mention that Umbra literally couldn't care less that he was cursed, she's more mad he didn't talk to her in person for that whole time. (They're like in their thirties I don't know the exact ages)
(Wow sure hope Umbra doesn't see something she's not supposed to see and go to run off to tell him and drag him down with her to be higher being of existence forcefully accidentally because she couldn't keep it to herself) (also Celesteal gets Cynosura pointified Midway through talking about how they probably shouldn't know this and how one of them might get hurt because he quote unquote "thought it would be really funny" Umbra tried to punch him in the face, to little success.)
Despair is an orphan and is also distinctly not human. (He's not exactly sure how to say what he is in English so he just goes with what everybody else calls him, a demon.) he also chose that name when he was an edgy teenager, his friends call him Dee because it's kind of hard to take the name Despair seriously. Despair still finds the name cool even though he is going to be twenty soon.
Cynosura offered him a place to stay shortly after he lost his parents at like 10ish. He takes up this offer randomly and then randomly leaves. They consider each other to kind of be like Uncle and nephew.
Eve, Despair, and Laoin are all friends.
Laoin is part dragon because I think that's cool.
Funny random thing I thought of, Laoin is friends with Trussy (I don't like that name that much I kind of want to change it but I don't know to what) who is friends with Sheldon And Laoin is also friends with Despair who is friends with Cynosura so when Cynosura needed house repairs once Despair mentioned that to Laoin who mentioned it to Trussy who then paired up with Sheldon to help fix Cynosura house while not knowing him directly at all.
Ixol gets pointified last and only gets pointified because his entire friend group mysteriously disappeared and he managed to -in his grief- figure out almost everything he had a board with red string across it and everything he was like one pin away from figuring out the identity of Stratosfear, I am serious. He figured out that the points probably where his friends because it's a little suspicious that each time one of his friends disappears there's a new guy with their exact personality who doesn't remember their past, this happened to him like four times. Cyalm when he realized what Despair had figured out was shocked and really impressed because he proceeded to do that and then never do anything like that ever again.
Yawgate is not supposed to let the pure points into other pure points dimensions but he does it anyway behind Celesteal's back because he feels really bad that they wouldn't be able to see each other any other way. (Celestial doesn't really care that much, he knows Yawgates doing it he just feels like it's not worth his time to stop it. Yawgate doesn't know that Celesteal knows about that) Only reason he didn't visit Stratosfear for that whole time is because Celestial specifically blocked off that pocket dimension.
Morword is surprisingly optimistic for seeing an infinite number of alternative timelines that the future could go into many of which includes people she cares about dying. But she chooses to specifically not think about that.
Pasless is one of the only people who knows about the infinite amount of timelines cause unlike the rest of them there is only one him and he is just split apart infinitely, he does a surprisingly good job at keeping the different parts of him separate and not letting anyone else know that he is constantly doing that. He talks to Morword about it occasionally though. Morword doesn't let him know how much it bothers her that those infinite number of timelines that she sees do actually happen in a different timeline.
That whole speech Morword and Pasless gave about how "you control the future but can someone else control the past and if so would we know" was incredibly pre-planned, they practice that for like a month straight once Morword saw that someone was going to see them.
(Yes, I am a sucker for them considering themselves siblings, how did you know?)
Stratosfear has PTSD.
The Red x did not have a name he consistently went by until someone else decided to name him (I want the first star savior to name him but I am not sure if that directly goes against the canon) and then once he realized he could change his name he went ballistic with changing his name. Like, come on he did it thrice.
Blueband is one of the few humans the Red x personally likes blueband is very loyal to the Red x and as a reward for his good behavior he gets to be pointified and keep his memories (he's the red guy who tried and failed to guard the elemental points) he's a little upset that he can't wear his hat anymore due to the horns. When blue bands pointified form I forgot his name and I don't care enough to look it up see stratosfear he exclusively refers to him as the star stealer, this annoys Stratosfear greatly.
VR! The shard savior is a 20 year old (or at least she thinks she is) named Charlotte (hooray I didn't steal that name form that fanfiction I read 2 years ago) who, as previously established, thinks it is completely normal to not remember the first 15 years of your life and is Celesteal's favorite creation. (She does not know this)
VR! Verfection (Yes, he is a pointified version of the second Star saver, he has lost all of his memories.) is best friends with the Voxier. (Their friendship is the poster child for extrovert adopts introvert) Verfection is one of the very few people that Voxier actually cares about and makes them actually want to exist and not return to the nothingness he (supposedly) came from.
VR! Verfection and Charlie freaking hate each other.
COS! Arrolin and Ixol freaking die. And on a completely unrelated note Compale loses one of his legs. (They're not supposed to be able to lose those but voixer managed to anyway) You see the joke is that it's not unrelated Ixol dies so Compale won't, haha. (This just in woman (me) who, once again, can't handle tragedies has made another tragedy.)
Still COS! Ixol also had the ability to see ghosts and was able to see Arrolin's ghost she was happy about this, Ixol was not. Ixol could always see ghosts, he just thinks he's really lost at this time, he already knew he was probably insane this was just the tipping point for him to actually realize it. Once Ixol is dead he also becomes a ghost and realizes he probably should have told the others before he kicked the bucket.
Also COS! geez I have a lot of head cannons for COS! Said crown of shadows is a corrupting force that corrupts the user and when in a room with only one person will attempt to attach itself to said person's head. Voixer would have without the crown of shadows never tried to actually kill the points just try to figure out a method to go back to the void it's only the crown of shadows that gave him the idea of killing the characters in the story to also kill himself to end the story. Not that the rest of the points will ever know this except for Nicholas.
You know what I'm just going to tell you when it's not COS! Anymore okay?: Oopsie Daisy, Nick, you killed the guy who the crown was on and you were the only person in the room, guess what the crown is going to try to do. That's right! Force itself on your head. So Nick any actively crumbling building thing starts getting pointified, uh-oh. Luckily for him he's in an actively crumbling building (a sentence that has probably been said exactly once) and the rubble knocks the crown of his head, (Yay!) it also cuts off his arm (Not yay!) because he is not fully point yet and he does not get the neat ability to regrow his limbs until after one of his limb is already gone.
He wakes up surprisingly okay for just being under a crumbling building, he's also a point now and actively missing an arm and there's also this evil crown trying to get on his head so in his panic he tries it to stuff it in his bag, this somehow works in stopping it.
A little meme based off of that:
He's going to go by verfection now because he feels a little weird in breaking tradition of choosing a new name when you become a point. He also got the ability to see ghosts, get haunted by your dead friends, idiot. Surprisingly this is good for Verfection's mental health because that means he can't completely isolate himself. Voixer doesn't directly haunt him because he feels a little still messed up in the head and also feels guilt, a lot of guilt, and shame, quite a bit of shame.
Verfection just went back to living at his house because he didn't tell anyone where he lived. Verfection is not doing well because even though he got the crown off soon enough that he didn't go completely mad he still isn't doing great mentally and feels a lot of guilt because he got the memories of Voixer and now feels like he killed someone who didn't deserve it. He's mostly just trying to keep the crown safe to stop anyone else from getting it put on their heads. Surprisingly putting it in a bag still is working. Just for safe measures he locked it in a specific room that no one is meant to go into as well as putting it in a safe in said room. He still has not told his friends he's alive because he feels a lot of guilt and a lot of emotions right now.
Also Signol just loses her memory again, don't worry she'll get it all back when they managed to figure out how symbol breaking works in the crown of shadows timeline which I haven't figured out how they're going to figure that out but I know they will figure it out.
FINALLY WE'RE DONE WITH CROWN OF SHADOWS FOR NOW
VR! Verfection was actually a scrapped idea that Celesteal had he scrapped it because he thought it was too similar to the first star savior's fate. However those scrapped ideas came out whenever the world started literally breaking.
None of them know how points work (except celesteal for obvious reasons) exactly they mostly got it figured out but sometimes they'll just figure out something completely new about how they work for instance,
Okay after this point I'm just going to specify when the vein reveal section is done: There would be a boss fight between Stratosfear and Anshine in which they would fuse and then not figure out how to defuse until after they were uncorrupted. After Celesteal was brought back he revealed but that's just a thing they can do and I've always been able to do he just never mentioned it before.
Despite the fact that Yawgate is on the side of "we need to bring celesteal back or else the world will literally end", it is important to know he is one of celesteal's top five biggest haters. Probably being biggest hater number two or three. He was often threatened with being erased from existence by him and over time him threatening to do that to people that you love and actually doing it at least once causes you to dislike a person over time.
In the final fight of "we shouldn't bring back an evil dictator who literally locked up a guy for 300 years cause he thought it'd be funny I guess" vs "okay but we literally need to bring him back or else the world will literally end we hate him too" Verfection accidentally cuts Charlie's arm off which simultaneously makes Verfection's symbol break due to the intensity of it all and causes Charlie to realize that she is indeed not human because her arm is bleeding pink and is shattering into shards that are actively rebuilding themselves in front of her. All of the same time celesteal is actively getting remade from the shards collected.
Celesteal did not intend to come back after being killed he did not think that the world would just shatter into pieces, he thought it would be more like a crown of shadows if anything. When he does come back he's like "Oh. Oh. I messed up didn't I? I made a miscalculation somewhere... :D Hiiiii Charlie! <3 My favorite creation! How are you doing? Oh, you've grown so much! What are they feeding you around here?" And everyone's just kind of standing there like "what".
ALRIGHT I THINK THAT'S THE END OF IT
I definitely forgot some of my head cannons (I have a lot) but this post is getting so like incredibly long I think I'm good with ending it here.
Ending notes:
"Why do half of the pre points know each other? It's not very realis-"
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 🤫🤫🤫🤫🤫 I don't care. And they all live in pretty close vicinity just because that's easier for me. And by pretty close I mean no one is more than like a city away.
"Where are the elemental points? You barely mentioned them."
Shut up they're still there I just forgot their names and I don't have a lot of ideas for them all I know is blue bands pointified form I forgot his name was supposed to be guarding them, he failed at guarding them. They all want the crown of shadows because it is immensely powerful even though it's a corrupting Force I don't know what happens next I haven't thought about them nearly as much as the others.
I also have several au's including the previously established vein reveal and crown of shadows au's I explained above and several others including "pathetic loser villain OC makes Nicholas have a bad time" (ASK ME ABOUT HIM PLEASE) and "what if Verfection was a pure point" and other various ideas.
#Guys I'm being dragged back into this fandom because of pointtober help me#Man it's so embarrassing when I have to bring up my OCS for the star savers because#Like 2 years ago I read a fanfiction very early into the fandom and those names from that fanfiction stuck with me#I changed their personalities I think but the names are the same from that dang fanfiction#The shard savior name is different though I just made a new girl up#Putting all of your ideas out is really fun I think I'm going to update my adolescent evil turtles list because my ideas have changed#Significantly for my version of the turtles#I am making an adventure forward video and it will come out soon I have a couple more drawings to make#a rare original post#Long post#Adventure forward#Adventure forward 2#Af2#Adventure forward headcanons#Do I want to tag all of the characters individually? Probably not. But I think I'll do some of them that I have the most head cannons for#Celesteal#Cyalm#cyalm af2#stratosfear#star savior#second star savior#Shard savior#Af:cos#Adventure forward: crown of shadows#Adventure forward vein reveal#Afvr#headcanon#Verfection#Voixer
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also i wanted to see if i could gather enough fullbodies i've done to make a kinda height chart and that fact that it makes such a nice gradient is so funny to me actually. i might have to make someone in the crime gang like 5'8" just so i'll have a single skeleton with a normal fucking height
#I HAVENT UPDATED STRETCH YET STOP LAUGHING AT HIM#i'll probably shrink rogue whenever i add him tbh.....i think he could fit the short king role well enough#the difference in art styles between refs is Also very funny to me. u can definitely tell i drew most of these in different years#i even had to shrink honey's head down so he wouldn't look as jarring lmao#unpictured is the aforementioned rogue & smiley who i don't/didn't have canon heights for yet & tbh didnt feel like copy/pasting atm#and also spooks. who i never once designed the lower half of#like i'm being so genuine and true when i say i have no idea what his feet look like.#he'll. he'll be a minute#i have to redesign him So bad. i have a couple ideas. but also he's dead so i dont care about him enough rn oops !#he also doesn't have a canon height but i at least have a range for him which is “taller than honey in a slightly freakish manner"#sludge also doesn't have a canon height but i've said before he's Malleable so he still gets to be on the list#i wonder if this makes it obvious who my favorite character is and who atbb is centered around. can anybody tell idk
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I normally don't vague post about other people (and I'm not really here, even) but someone in the tag suggested that Jack would make a better Team Leader than Yusei and it made me realize something, in part, about why people think that Yusei is boring.
tl;dr: Yusei isn't boring; he was written as the MC in the wrong genre.
See, Shonen protagonists typically have the following personality traits: loud, brash, hot-headed, sometimes abrasive. Yusei is none of those things, and Jack is ALL of them. Which, I'm sure, is what led that person to say that Jack would make the better leader and what leads so many people (who are mostly only fans of Shonen anime) to say that Yusei is boring. He doesn't fit their expectations of what a Shonen protag is supposed to look like, therefore he's boring.
But the thing is, if you popped him into, say, a Slice of Life, he'd be perfectly at home (well...except for the Trademark YGO Hair anyway) and well-loved by the fan base. I can say this with fair certainty because I've at least never seen anyone say that Natsume Takashi (Natsume's Book of Friends) is boring in any way, and honestly the two of them have very similar temperaments. The difference is, obviously, the genre of their respective stories.
Slice of Life allows for its protags to be softer-spoken, more reserved; Shonen often does not.
It's time people stopped saying that Yusei is boring and just admit that they like loud, brash characters as opposed to quiet ones, and that Yusei just doesn't fit what they expect from a Shonen protagonist.
He's not boring; he was just written for the wrong genre.
#not to mention that sol actually allows for exploration of trauma but that's another story lol#oh also for the record: jack would NOT make a better team leader#loud brash hotheaded and abrasive are NOT traits that make a good team leader#i could make a whole post solely about that but i won't haha#it doesn't mean i dont like jack btw#i love jack!#...but that doesn't mean i think he would make a good leader#anyway#yugioh 5ds#yusei fudo#also before someone comes for my head and starts listing off shonen with reserved mcs#i'm sure not ALL of them fit the description above#i haven't seen every shonen every made#what i CAN say is that of the ones i've seen the mcs usually fit at least TWO of the four traits listed#this also isn't anything against shonen! i like a good shonen once in a while!#i'm just saying there are differences in genre here (which. should be obvious. but this is tumblr. so gotta cover my bases lol)#and different genres have different character tropes#and yusei as the mc does not fit those character tropes#so for people who love that character trope then yeah a character who doesn't fit it isn't going to be interesting to you personally#okay at this point i have an additional essay in the tags so i'm done lol
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Man I wonder where the leader of the fear realm could've gone, it's alMOST LIKE NEVIN HAS AN
#had to re-edit the image real quick because the original edit was from a post I made about Drew years ago#and while the Drew thing is becoming less and less likely. Nevin havinv one has basically been canon since#someone mentioned Greg's (was it Britney's) aura being familiar in s2ch1. ive been putting together a list of every line#that points to Nevin's aura throughout the whole thing (most from s2ch1 but then s2ch10 came out and it was really canon at that point)#but clearly i'm running out of time to say ''i fucking called it'' before it's explicitly stated and i dont want to be in another situation#where somebody else will beat me to a theory and me posting anything about it will seem like copying them. sorry about that btw i had#thought i had already mentioned theorizing that nevin was possessed by a demon in that old theory i made but i had forgotten that one was#super old and was about sigma. so no copying there i just got extremely paranoid there was a mention of a cult and i was like ''nuh uh#that's way too specific and out there of a detail to end up in both our theories'' and i forgot the rest of my super old post was outdated#as hell. and echos had gone ''yeah they're so similar!'' and i took their word for it but now i'm realizing they were probably just trying#to be supportive. so yeah no copying there i was just beaten to the punch of saying something. but i will NOT back down from the aura shit#because i have been calling that shit FROM THE START or at least since i started reading ibvs back when ch20 came out.#also not backing down from saying chris was the worse friend because these past few chapters are the first time isaac has done anything tha#could knowingly upset chris meanwhile chris has. let edward drag isaac to the lair after isaac said edward would beat him up. chose not to#believe edward was holding the secrets over their heads because 'it was something isaac had said' and then immediately distrusted edward in#the next chapter because a random person he didn't know said to steal a book (might i mention how that entire scene proves chris' lack of#development and refusal to take responsibility because it perfectly alludes to when chris had brought those fireworks into his old school#and makes me wonder if charlie has actually gotten him in trouble with his past schools or if he's still just not taking responsibility#and if him following nevin to the woods to test out their powers is an extension of ''if something bad happens its not my fault''#like seriously this man would bring a mysterious suitcase onto a plane if he's told to). uh what was i talking about agai#anyway on a related note my mental state has only gotten worse since i left tumblr and the habit of thinking about chris instead of sleepin#or doing schoolwork has not stopped. so i was still failing for a while and might graduate now but am still staying away from tumblr.#so yeah this was a little update and im not going to linger this time im just going to leave tumblr again right after hitting post#addendum because i just can't let things go. and was thinking about chris again. i don't think his lack of development is because of bad#writing (anymore. i used to.). instead i'm certain his character arc is going to continue into him following someone (nevin probably) into#doing something really bad. and then he'll finally get actual consequences and go 'oh shit i fucked up real bad this time'#if you think that theory is reaching too far into the future you should hear mine about isaac dying at the end lmao
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You've been challenged! (Pokemon AU)
A/N: This is an experimental piece that I wanted to try out because I was inspired by this Pokemon Battle featuring Delphox. This is a different take on a Genshin Impact Pokemon AU. This was done in conjunction with @xianyoon for their Extreme Bias Game. Special thanks to @floraldresvi for assisting me with the ideas for Thoma's section.
Characters: Lyney, Thoma
Genre: Mostly fluff, with hints of angst
Summary:
Pokemon and Genshin collide in this Pokemon style AU that answers the question: What would happen if the characters you encountered in Genshin Impact challenged you?
If you were challenged by them, what would be their in-game tagline when they challenged you to a battle? What would their title be on the game screen? And most importantly, what would be their character summaries?
In short, it positions the different Genshin Impact characters as in-game coded sprites.
Word Count: Lyney (277 words), Thoma (328 words)
You have been challenged by the House of Hearth's Second in Command, Lyney!
Tagline: "Let's give them a show to remember!"
Brief Summary:
Tricks, Illusions, and Magic galore! Whenever anyone takes a seat at Lyney's shows in the Court of Fontaine, they will be in for a magical time. Charming, charismatic, and talented are all words that describe the renowned magician. Lyney and his aforementioned magic shows are famous across the Fontanian landscape. But few know the man behind the spectacle.
Growing up, Lyney owes much of his present success to his upbringing in orphanage known as: The House of Hearth. His sister, Lynette, and his (adopted) brother, Freminet, also grew up there as well. While not much is known about The House of Hearth, it is full of unexpected surprises.
To Lyney, family means to the world to him. He will do anything to protect it. Second only to the "Father" of the House of Hearth, he is the one that will eventually be "Father's successor." Despite his young appearance, there is a reason that he is the second in command. Anyone who ends up underestimating him, regrets it.
For the Magician Lyney, he always wants to keep people on their toes. His Pokemon are the same way. Some of Lyney's trusted Pokemon partners include the show stopping, Delphox and Meowscarada. They also have some tricks up their sleeves as well.
Special Notes:
Lyney's interest in magic has spread to his Pokemon too. His Delphox is a bit of a magician as well - blink and things will disappear. On the other hand, his Meowscarada is ready for anything. It's able to adapt on the fly, like any good magician does.
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You have been challenged by the mysterious foreign fixer, Thoma!
Tagline: "Let me protect you. It's what I want to do."
Basic Summary:
Inazuma is a land of tradition.
However, Thoma himself has a very non-traditional skill set.
As someone with skills in cooking and cleaning, he enjoys using his skills to assist people whenever he can. His earnest kindness, his willingness to help, and loyalty have made him well liked among the Inazuman Citizens, despite their wariness towards foreigners.
As a foreigner, Thoma cares deeply about others. He knows what it's like to have people be wary of you due to things out of his control. As someone with a deep sense of duty and loyalty, he is not someone who forgets his debts or reneges on them.
Thoma's actions have earned him the nickname of fixer, as he is well-versed in the art of fixing problems. For someone like Thoma, resolving things peacefully is always preferable. Whether it's a small fight between children over toys to a fight between foreign and local merchants, Thoma would prefer if both sides could compromise.
But if things things escalate, don't be fooled.
When push comes to shove, Thoma's willing to do what it takes to protect himself and his family from harm. Once you have wormed your way into the heart of the foreign fixer, he will protect you until his dying breath.
For the mysterious Fixer, he is well-informed of any happenings going on in Inazuma. He has to be, due to the nature of his job.
With such a dangerous job, he needs partners he can rely on.
One of his trusted Pokemon partners is Talonflame. Talonflame soars above the skies of Inazuma, its keen eyes alerting Thoma to any potential issues that may arise within Inazuma. And for those conflicts that can't be fixed peacefully and require a 'forceful' touch, Thoma's other partner Blaziken, is there to help - both its master, its family, and the people of Inazuma.
#genshinblr may ebg 2024#Genshinblr EBG May 2024#Library Shadows - Works#((((((( So I'm positioning this AU as like if the Genshin Impact Characters were in-game Pokemon Trainer Sprites. )))))))#((((((( If I could draw this I would. But I can't. So I have to rely on my words to do it for me. )))))))#((((((( I admit I was tempted to do a team listing but I don't think I have enough time. )))))))#((((((( EBG is nice as a way to challenge and try out new ideas for formats I wouldn't think of otherwise. )))))))#((((((( But also I was listening to some Pokemon Champion osts from the different eras of the series. That is how this came about. )))))#(((((((((( I still can't believe how quickly this AU idea came together honestly. ))))))))#(((((((((( It started as a fleeting thought but the more I thought about it the more it worked for me. )))))))#(((((((((( Both Lyney and Thoma are interesting characters b/c there is an element of danger to both of them that I find intriguing. ))))))#((((((( For Lyney specifically I wanted to focus on the fact that he is part of the Fatui. He's Arle's successor! )))))))#((((( Knowing that Lyney is Arle's successor creates an interesting dynamic that I want to explore. Especially with his voice lines. )))#((((((( For the descriptions it started as my attempt at a Dainslief style voiceover. )))))))#(((((( Then it just kinda morphed into like character descriptions for them in the Pokemon game I have in my head. )))))))#((((( It's times like these I wish I could code? or do Photoshop? It would've been fun to sprite-ify Thoma and Lyney. ;_; ))))))#(((((( Fun fact: I did try to make my own Fontaine Pokeball Sprite. Unfortunately my computer couldn't handle it and I lost everything. )))#((((( It wasn't an impressive sprite by any means. But I did try my hand. It was a different and way harder than expected. )))))))#(((((( Like I knew making a sprite would be hard. But I didn't expect how hard it was going to be. )))))#Genshin Impact
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Idk if you have done so already and I hope it's not rude of me to ask, but have you thought about making a list of all the characters you have swapped in your swap AU so far? I think it would be a very comprehensive guide for all that are interested.
Have a nice week! Cheers!
I haven't actually made a list of all the swapped characters or even thought about making one, but good idea! I keep track of the swaps mostly in my head only but since I've gotten so far with this au more than I expected myself to, I think a character guide would be quite handy. Of course it won't have all the characters, only the ones that have been swapped already/I've confirmed who they're swapped with
#BUT ANYWAYS Yeah I'll make the post soon. it will be handy for myself and for the people who want to keep track of the aus characters#ty vio for this I know damn well I myself would've not thought about making a character guide and just kept it all in my head#like I do with most aus I've made in my lifespan#black butler#kuroshitsuji#red butler au#black butler swap au#mono ask#edit: I'm working on it now and I just realized the list is longer than I expected oh god
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Alright, third verse, same as the first two, but NEW GASH BELL MANGA CHAPTER AGAIN
I'M GONNA SOB
EVERY TIME AN OLD CHARACTER RETURNS
I'M JUST GONNA BE A FUCKIN WRECK GUYS
WE GOT MEGUMI AND TIO BACK TOGETHER EVERYONE CHEER RIGHT FUCKIN NOW I MEAN IT
Agh I want Won Lei and Lee Yen to show up soon but I know it's probably gonna be Umagon and Sunbeam first. I'm not disappointed, obviously but I MISS WON LEI AND LEE YEN OKAY????
I DON'T KNOW WHY BUT I'VE ALWAYS THOUGHT WON LEI WAS SO FUCKING COOL I MISS HIM
#And not just them#I miss so many people#I wanna see Brago and Sherry#I WANNA SEE DANNY#AND TED#AND CHERISH#FUCK DUDE WE'LL PROBABLY GET APOLLO AND ROPPES AGAIN AND THAT'S GONNA MAKE ME INTO A SOBBING PUDDLE LET ME TELL YOU NOW#This is what I love about this manga#There are so many characters with so many distinct personalities#I couldn't list all the people I wanna see again if you held a gun to my head I wanna see them ALLL#There are even a bunch of smaller characters who only got one or two chapters#I can already think of a few who are almost definitely gonna get the spotlight at some point and I'm HYPED#I MISSED THEM ALLL SO MUCH#except zophise#They're a bitch-ass Freeza-looking mother-fucker#Fuck em#Bring in Kururu#And even Momon#AND WON LEI GOD DAMN YOU BRING HIM AND LEE YEN BACK SOON PLEASE I BEG#Zatch Bell#Gash Bell#Zatch Bell 2#Gash Bell 2#Zatch Bell Manga#Tio#Megumi Ooumi#Kiyomaro Takamine#Umagon#Sunbeam#DNAVerse Discussions
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Current Situation would actually probably be solved if I stopped looking to Projects for all my satisfaction in life
#i wrote out a list of the things i would need to research to write the *fics* that i want to work on#let alone my actual Official Grad School Projects#of which i have several other ideas in the works besides the ones which i'm actually doing for final papers#and then of course there are several original stories i want to write too but those are who knows how far out#current thing i've been spinning around in my head is writing something about lascars on east india company ships#(specificallly i have set my heart on writing a story about a mutiny on board one of them which ties in with Indian History happenings#in the general outside world and everything sort of being in a process of change (have not decided on an era yet hence Vague)#and also the main characters are a nayar boy and mappila muslim boy who he has a huge crush on and they get a love story)#not really sure how to make this story work at all because the amount of things i'd want to know for it#involve several decades of research probably to do it well#but hey that's never stopped me!#not to mention the fact that i started reading about 18th c. conceptions of sex and now want to work more on hornblower top surgery fic#with more fun and spicy early 1800s medical debates and such#and also i want to work on my stephen getting captured by the french but it's canto jo i la muntanya balla fic#which *also* involves lots and lots of research so ughhhh#i wonder how i got into this situation. i wonder why everything feels like So Much 🤔🤔🤔 could not be my fault at all#perce rambles
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when i think "romantic friendship" i think of all the anime i watched when i was like 13/14 and just realizing i was maybe a lesbian that had all-girl casts and everything was just so extremely gay. pmmm, yuyuyu, school-live!, yuru yuri, etc.
#the yuru yuri theme song still lives rent-free in my head even though i didn't actually make it that far in the show#it was cute but it just wasn't my thing like if you look at everything else on the list it's all super dark#cause that's what i was into at the time and yuru yuri was a fun palette cleanser but it didn't hold my interest for long#i literally remember nothing about it except the uniforms and the theme song at this point#and yuyuyu..... i loved yuyuyu but i can never rewatch it because i'm no longer 14 and can't look past the horrific ableism#like wow looking back that's so fucked up on so many levels. it has so much else going for it but jesus christ#pmmm and school-live! really hold up tho and i'm super glad i read the school-live! manga after rewatch a couple years ago#because wow i REALLY resonate with kurumi's arc and her journey with disability#i can't speak to how well yuki's psychosis is treated but it's nice that she's the main character and her psychosis isn't seen as scary#the bar is really just on the floor huh 😭
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also i went through your profile just now, i know it is a lot to ask but if you find time, please write the Styrain GP fic!!? it's such a pivotal piarles moment ™ in their lore and THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH ANGSTY FICS ON IT like, HOW. I JUST. am so baffled.
that gp haunts the living daylights out of me. it could've been the end of them. had pierre not forgiven charles, everything would've been just gone or not the same anymore, at the very least. AND THIS IS PIERRE we are talking about. who's had a rough f1 journey to put it mildly, and charles KNOWS, and yes we can all say the demotion was in the past but I'm pretty sure half of the planet is still processing 2020, even i find it hard to believe that we're in 2023, in my brain 2019 was yesterday and the fact that all the drivers are constantly under scrutiny, "you're only as good as your last race" thinking and shenanigans and i just. pierre could've chosen his career over charles and i truly would've understood it, because like, at the end of the day, all these drivers what they really care about is results and winning and points and anything that comes in between is ruthlessly put aside AND DESPITE ALL THAT, DESPITE EVERYTHING, the fact that they made up and found their way back to each other, the fact that pierre would rather not worry about a botched race even though it came at the expense of charles, the fact that by next Wednesday he was making jokes about the incident in interviews, that he didn't carry any grudges and grievances forward and everything was okay, because it was Charles.
i have no trouble believing that had it been anyone else, it would've caused a fallout, i know if something on track goes wrong between Este and him next season, the old grievances would come back haunting them,, BUT that was never the case with charles, because it's charles and he's so much more important, he's so much more valued and cherished in Pierre's mind than the race itself, the fact that they moved on and they have talked about it in case it happens in the future, the fact that they're able to separate track life from their personal life, the fact that even though they have shitty races, if the other has a good one, they won't hesitate to celebrate each other. I AM JUST SO IN LOVE WITH THEIR BOND.
like if we think of it in terms of pierre's career, 2021 was a GOOD year for him, he was definitely turning heads and making people question whether his talents should be reduced to a rb b team, 2021 is such a crucial year in his career trajectory and this incident happened in that year. it would've been easy to let anger take over and let charles go, it would've been easy to let wounds fester and boil over, but he didn't, they didn't. because it's them and they're important to each other and i just want to cry now.
all this to say, i really would love if you wrote the Styrain GP fic, hehehe
🙏🙏🙏
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH, anon, i have been coming back to my inbox to read through this again and again just to nod my way fervently through it, because, YES. yes yes yes yes yes!!! you get it, oh my god, you just get it. everything you said here is so "!!!" and so very true - pierre could easily have let charles go, as you said, and it would've been completely understandable considering where his career is at. (and also bcs pear is a bit of a petty bitch, lmao, just LOOK at those infamous film festival shenanigans with este, hehe 😏🤭) but the point is: charles is different. to pierre, charles is different, and special, and even though pierre was rightfully pissed off after the race, he still listened to charles and forgave him when he came to talk to him. and just. god. as piarles moments go, it is absolutely HUGE omg 🙏🙏🙏 you have said it all so absolutely perfectly that i don't think there's much more for me to say other than just, fuck yeah, styria 2021 is a massive one. omg.
now secondly: i am so 🥺���� and 🥰 that you took the time to go through my profile (and my freaking insane tags) like this!! that is SUCH a sweet thing to do, and ridiculously flattering, omg 🙈🙈😍 this one made me particularly happy bcs the styria fic is one i've been wanting to write since the moment i first learned what happened between them there. and that was, oh, freaking MAY 2022?? well before i'd even published my first f1 fic to AO3... yeah. the styria gp piarles fic is one that's been living in the back of my mind and heart for months now, so i am so touched that you are this excited about it too 🥺🥺 this ask has definitely inspired me to bump the styria fic up a good few places on my to-be-written list, so, ily always for that, anon ❤️
the last thing i wanted to say! omg, i completely agree that there aren't nearly enough angsty styria fics out there (but that's bcs i'm a bit of a whore for a good old angsty reconciliation fic and in my opinion there can NEVER be enough of them.) i've checked my AO3 bookmarks for you, though, anon, and i've actually found three which i've read and adored:
hand covers bruise by anonymous - i can't lie to you, i know exactly who the author of this one is 🙈 so i went to their AO3 profile to find it, and it had DISAPPEARED, and i nearly had a mini heart attack, ngl to you, because this is my favourite styria fic of all. i literally went "no no no! please no!" when i thought it had been deleted 💔 but thankfully it's still there, only on anon. so i will respect the author's privacy and not link it to them here, but omg, i will say that this fic is EVERYTHING one could ever want in a styria piarles fic. the hate-sex-that-isn't-really-hate-sex, 🐶 style (!!) but also a conversation about what happened between them, and the characterisation... it's PERFECT, truly it is. i cannot recommend this one enough 🙏
kiss it better by foxholecourts on AO3 - this is another "they fuck it out" post-styria, and it is as angsty as it is absolutely excellent and wildly hot. fun fact: this is on my very first page of AO3 bookmarks in this fandom! old but GOLD, as they say 🤭💙
the consequences of your actions by emotionalsupportfastcars on AO3 - this is a really beautiful (and heartbreaking) look at pierre and charles' emotional journey post-styria: particularly angsty bcs it portrays them already in a committed relationship here. there's no smut in this one, but there are SO many emotions, and i find it absolutely stunning in its simplicity. just such a good bit of angst writing, this!
so there you have it, anon! sorry for making you wait so long for this reply (🙈) but i am unfortunately distractible as alllll hell and very messy and chaotic when it comes to answering asks, i'm afraid. but i LOVED this ask so much, and i appreciate you so so much for sending it! ❤️❤️
#asks & answers#anon#styria anon#piarles fic rec#and i suppose i can also tag this with a WIP tag of my own?? 🤔🤔 since it is technically about my own styria fic as well#hmmmmm#wip: stay stay stay#(yes the styria WIP in my head really is titled after 'stay stay stay' by taylor swift)#(a taylor swift title from katie singsweetmelodies... shock of the year 😆🤭🤭)#no okay but the styria WIP is actually very close to my heart#because the styrian gp 2021 was just SUCH an iconic piarles moment omfg#everything it means to them... AHHHH#of fucking course i need to write about it#and having just reread all the styria fics i know if - i'm even happier with my own idea bcs it's from CHARLES' POV#where most others have pierre POV#which yes is a very logical choice and makes for BEAUTIFULLY angsty reading#but personally i think it could be INCREDIBLE to have charles' POV on it as well#how terrified was he of losing pierre's friendship? bcs i'm sure he would've realised it's a possibility#for the exact reasons you listed out so beautifully anon#about pierre's character etc (and ofc charles knows pierre better than anyone so 💙)#ANYWAY the point is. styria piarles fic. hell *yes* it is getting written someday 🙏🙏💙 idk when i'll have time but...#i WILL write it. i will. no doubts there. 💙💙💙💙#anyway love you anon thanks so much for this amazing ask <333
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currently in that stage of writing where there are only like two songs that are doing it for me as inspiration for the specific tone i'm after so i just keep listening to them over and over again and can feel myself getting sick of them
#i'm not gonna be able to listen to them at all in six months rip#rn those songs are worst in me by unlike pluto#and ready for your love by felix jaehn ft. sophie ellis-bextor which was the song that gave me the inspiration for this story in the#first place. something about the vibe is just so ominous and contrary to the lyrics that it makes me think about murder and money instead.#i heard it and went home and immediately started writing a con artist who is in deep over his head lmao#everyone absolutely shocked to find me writing yet another character entering relationships with nefarious intentions ik#i also added it to my list of songs that could make it as james bond theme songs ha ha ha
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"creature of myth."
pairing: vampire!gojo x fem!human!reader summary: when you receive an offer of marriage from a mysterious wealthy lord, it’s too good a deal for your family to turn down. but nothing could be so perfect... right? content: MDNI (18+ ONLY), dark content, nsfw, gets dubcon/noncon in some spots, yandere behavior from gojo, implied death/k*lling of a character (not reader or gojo), arranged marriage, victorian au, plot that ends with porn lmao, spooky dooky vibes, blood, blood sucking/eating, praise, biting, unprotected sex, creampie, virgin!reader, discussion of virginity, cherry popping, pain, pet names (princess/love), reader is highkey clueless about sex, discussion of masturbation, ideas of masturbation as “sinful”, very minor religious themes, fated “mates”, gojo is highkey insane, coercion and manipulation, like SO much neck kissing, ooc gojo??? (had to alter his character to match a victorian vampire lord LMAO). a/n: PLEASE READ THE CONTENT WARNINGS. THERE IS DARK CONTENT AHEAD. is this a gojo fic or a twilight fic?? Going back to my roots fr fr. straight down to the “SAY IT, SAY IT”. this fic is also way too long my apologies bbs. i hope you like a hefty side of plot with your porn. parts of this fic feel way too cheesy to me but sometimes i eat that up, yk?? this fic was inspired by this amazing work by @rice5x ! and, finally, thank you all for the support on my most recent fics. i'm just getting back into being active on this blog and it's been amazing reading each and every comment/reblog/ask. they genuinely fill me with so much joy. keep them coming hehe. anyway, i hope you enjoy and remember, ALL AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED. credits: dividers by @cafekitsune. banner art by @ndsoda on twitter. wc: 11.6k (sowwy)
You remember perfectly the way your mother’s jaw dropped when Satoru Gojo proposed to you. You’d never seen the man, and you still hadn’t. He’d asked to marry you via messenger, a simple letter delivered by hand with a list of all the things he’d be willing to pay for your hand. Offers of money, land, protection, connection- anything so long as he got you. You’d thought it was a joke. Your father nearly took a shovel to the head of the poor messenger, thinking the letter was some kind of cruel prank, some sort of targeted disrespect. You’d only started to believe when you really looked- saw the Gojo crest embroidered on the man’s suit, the fine leather of his boots. If it was a prank, somebody had spent a great deal of money and effort to pull it off.
You’d asked for proof nonetheless, and you’d gotten it. Documents signed and sealed with a well-known waxen crest, gifts that could only have been purchased by a wealthy lord. The one thing you never got was the lord himself. He refused to see you, to come down from his mysterious castle on the hill. It didn’t surprise you. He rarely deemed town worthy of his presence. He had a reputation as a recluse, as a man who only ever liked to see and never be seen. What little glimpses people got of him were usually through the dark window of his carriage. Still, his appearance preceded him. White hair, light eyes… “haunting” said those who had the luck to see him. Those who went to work for the lord tended to return… changed— if they returned at all.
You accepted, of course. How could you not? You were a peasant family with no status or wealth to your name. The promises Lord Gojo had made would make your parents into aristocrats all on their own. But that left you wondering… why did he want you? You offered him no benefit. If anything, you sullied his bloodline. The question scratched at the back of your mind. It came to you while you ate breakfast, while you washed your clothes, while you weeded in the garden. Some part of you told you that you needed the answer before you ever stepped foot in that castle. You needed that answer, but you’d never get it.
Your wedding wasn’t even a wedding- just a piece of paper that had already been signed and witnessed, once again delivered by a familiar messenger. You signed at your dining room table and… that was that. You were married.
Later that night the carriages arrive. Men flood your home, all dressed in blue velvet, the Gojo crest embroidered on their chests. They seem puzzled when you tell them you’ve packed all your belongings into a measly three bags.
You say a quick goodbye to your parents, drawing them into stiff embraces. You love them, and they love you, but you can’t bear to see their faces as they send you away to a man who couldn’t even show his face for your wedding.
The carriage ride is somehow longer than you’d thought it would be- apparently, the castle’s size makes it seem deceptively close. The trip is rocky and twisty and altogether unpleasant as you steadily make your way toward the castle gates. By the time you reach them you think you’ve probably dozed in and out of consciousness at least half a dozen times.
The castle is even more intimidating up close. Spires that swirl into the clouds, sculptures that stare, doors that look more suited to being locked than opened. It’s… terrifying.
When you finally roll to a stop, you move for the door. When you swing it open you get your fair share of strange looks from your attendants and remember that you should have waited for the footman. Your face heats as you climb out anyway, unwilling to subject yourself to the further humiliation of waiting for assistance.
Your feet hit gravel and all you can do is stare- up, up, up, to where the castle’s peaks disappear into the fog. When your eye flashes to a window on the east side of the manor you think you see a swaying curtain. You tuck your arms around yourself and shiver, but it’s not from the cold.
You nearly stumble over your feet on your first step inside. The entrance hall is larger than your former house, with ceilings that stretch so high you can hardly make out the figures on the frescoes that adorn it. Silver and blue drape everywhere, the Gojo family colors. You swallow when you see a chair that is most definitely worth more than your family’s annual income.
The floors are marble and when your worn heels clack against it, you only feel reminded that you don’t belong here. That question pricks in your mind again as you pass portraits of every Gojo heir to have lived in the last three hundred years. Why me? Why me? Why me?
Your footman deposits you in your room, a place more lavish than you’ve ever seen. You have a four poster bed with a canopy of blue velvet, a window that overlooks a sprawling estate, and more square footage than you’ve ever dreamed of.
“Pull this if you need any sort of assistance, ma’am.”
You turn to see your footman referencing a silver cord at your bedside. You assume it’s one of those contraptions that rings a bell in the servants’ quarters. You try to hide your amazement- you’ve never seen one in real life before.
You clear your throat and give your most ladylike nod. “Thank you, um-” you pause, your brow furrowing. “I’m sorry, I don’t think I asked your name.”
Your footman appears stunned to silence, like he’d never expected you to care about his existence, much less his name. He recovers quickly, though, and forces a small smile. “Thomas, ma’am.”
You smile and it’s genuine. “Thank you, Thomas.”He bows and makes a beeline for the door, but you have one more question. “Oh, um, Thomas-” He freezes, turning slowly on his heel to face you.
“Yes, my lady?”
You cringe at the title. The sound of it creeps across your skin, foreign and… wrong. Why me? Why me? Why me?
You clear your throat again. “Do you know, um, well-” You shift, trying to word your question properly. “Do you know when I might see the Lord?”
There is a pause, a moment of tension and silence, and then an answer. “No, my lady.”
Thomas does not stick around for more questioning. The door clicks shut behind him and then you're left with only the sound of retreating footsteps.
You’re stunned to say the least, mouth still halfway open, more questions on the tip of your tongue. Should you seek him out? Was that proper? Would he come to you? Would he meet you for dinner, perhaps? Surely he would come to your room tonight to… consummate. Would that be the first time you lay eyes on him? When he’s over you?
You sigh. There’s nothing much to be done about it now. You find your way to the bed and sit down hesitantly. It feels like a crime to rumple such primped and polished cotton. You do it anyway- it’s going to happen sometime, right? You fall back against the mattress and don’t fail to notice how utterly comfortable it is. The silvery patterns on your canopy swirl and bend together. You’re tired. You didn’t sleep much last night, anxious for the morning… and it’s only mid-afternoon now. You had time for a nap, right? Your eyes are closing before you can convince yourself it’s a bad idea and then you’re swept away into a world of warm darkness.
You wake with a start. Your first thought is that it’s dark now. Your room is pitch black except for the stream of moonlight passing through your stupidly large window. Your mouth feels dry and your skin is cold, like you’ve just woken from a nightmare. If you have, you don’t remember it. Perhaps that’s a blessing.
You sit up, combing a finger through your hair and laughing pitifully when you realize that you left your shoes on as you slept. You hope Thomas didn’t walk in to find you in yet another unladylike position. A glance at the foot of the bed reveals he might have. Your bags have arrived- all three of them. You eye them with a combination of longing and contempt. They don't match this place. They’re worn and used- everything here is shiny and new. Still, they’re all you have, and all you have left of your life before. All you have left of home.
You stretch your arms above your head, nearly groaning at the burn in your muscles. The carriage ride did your body no favors and you suspect you’ll be sore for many days to come.
You rise, no longer content to lie in bed. You’ve had your rest and, from the state of darkness outside, you suspect your new husband might be joining you soon. The thought twists a certain tightness into your gut, but you push it aside. If that was the price you paid for all he gave your family… then you’d pay it gladly.
You start with candles, finding a box of matches at your bedside. You light every candelabra you can find. The room, the castle, seems so perpetually… black- like it soaks up every ray of light it touches. Even when you’ve finished it doesn’t feel like enough. You make a note to ask Thomas for more in the morning.
You find a meal, carefully prepared and preserved, on a table near your dresser. Judging by the fact that it’s still warm, you conclude that it can’t be much past mid-evening. You originally intend to pick at the food as you unpack, but one bite has your mouth watering. It is the most delicious thing to ever touch your lips, complete with dessert waiting on the side. You clean your plate before moving onto your bags.
You lay your clothes out on the bed. A few dresses, riding pants, undergarments, an assortment of ribbons and bows. At one time these items had been the finest things you owned- now you owned a castle.
You find an armoire that looks like a master sculptor carved its edges and grab a dress, intending to hang it. Instead, your dress hits the floor when you part the doors to find the hangers already full. Your lips part. Luxury dresses of silk and satin line the rack, fading into some that appear more casual outfits of cotton and linen. You stretch a hand out, curious and utterly… amazed. To think your new husband had gone to all the effort… Your hand brushes purple silk and-
“Do you like them?”
You screech, jumping to face the voice at your back. It takes a moment for your eyes to find him, leaning casually against one post of your bed. Your breath is stolen for a second time. Snow white hair, piercingly blue eyes, pale soft skin… you know who he is even without looking at his dress, at the air of authority he claims. He’s your husband… and he is the most devastatingly beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.
He laughs, then, and it’s a warmer sound than you’d thought it would be- rich and full. A sound that seeps into your bones and settles in your soul.
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you,” he says, but the twinkle in his eyes makes you think that perhaps that’s a lie.
Your heart pounds and your eyes flash to the door. It’s shut. You didn’t hear it open, nor did you hear it close behind him. You also didn’t hear footsteps, didn’t hear breaths, didn’t hear him.
He follows your gaze and laughs again, though it sounds a bit… strained?
“I have a habit of being unintentionally lightfooted. I apologize.”
Your heart is still pounding but you find it in yourself to have some decorum. You snap your jaw shut and bow your head slightly in respect. “You must be Lord Gojo. Forgive me for my insolence.”
There’s a beat, and then footsteps– ones you actually hear this time. You clench your jaw when he stops before you and then nearly gasp when he takes your hand and brings it to his lips.
“Satoru, please,” he winks and you think you might stop breathing. “I am your husband after all.”
You force yourself to nod, to swallow, to act normal. But how can you in the presence of a man that looks like… that? There’s something too unreal about him, too perfect. It’s almost… unsettling.
“Of course… Satoru.”
He straightens and shows you a close-lipped smile that digs a dimple into his left cheek. You have to look away to avoid stumbling over your own feet.
“So, do you like them?” Your brows furrow- “The dresses,” he clarifies.
“O-oh.” Your features relax into an easy smile. You turn back to your armoire, running a hand along another gown. You don’t think you’ve ever touched something so… finely made. “I like them very much. I don’t know how to thank you.”
There’s a little chuckle as you turn to face him again and you have to steel yourself before you meet his eyes. He’s mesmerizing, too mesmerizing. You think you could probably lose yourself in those eyes forever…
“No need to thank me. If they don’t fit, we’ll call for the seamstress in the morning.”
You nod softly, still lost to the situation. There’s a beat of silence in which your husband does nothing but… look at you. His eyes roam freely and the hair on your arms stands under his gaze. He traces the lines of your nose and jaw and lingers on your pulse. Can he see just how fast your heart is pounding?
“Did you… get dinner?” It’s a stupid question, you know, but you don’t think you can bear another second of that look he’s giving you. “I fell asleep and found a plate. I hope I didn’t prevent a proper meal…” You trail off. Perhaps you shouldn’t have pointed out your own shortcoming?
He gives you another smile and you swear he inches just a little closer. “You did no such thing. I’m… perfectly satisfied.”
You nod, glad that he doesn’t seem upset at the very least. Your lips press together, unsure of what to do or say. You’ve never had a husband before. Wasn’t he supposed to just sort of… put you on the bed and… do it?
Your eyes flit to said bed and your husband must see because he hurries to continue.
“Well, I’ll see you in the morning then, hm?” His eyes flit to your armoire and back again. “Wear the blue dress with the lace to breakfast, yeah? Been dying to see it on you.” He chuckles like he’s just told some sort of amusing joke.
Your brows furrow. That was… not the topic you’d been expecting. “You’re not…” You feel your cheeks heat and tighten your jaw. “Not staying the night?”
His lashes lower a fraction and those eyes pierce you again. You don’t think you could move even if you wanted to, even with him prowling closer, each step eating up the space between you. He doesn’t stop until you’re nose to nose and you can feel his breath fanning over your cheeks. It’s cold somehow, chilling, and you shiver. He smirks.
“Not tonight.”
His head dips and for a moment you think he’s going to kiss you, but then he’s bypassing your mouth altogether and- his lips connect to your pulse. His mouth is cool, just like his breath, and you shiver uncontrollably under his touch.
His touch is just a fleeting moment, just a wrinkle in time, and then he’s gone. His footsteps are quiet brushes on the hardwood and the creak of the door even seems tamed in his presence.
“Goodnight,” is all he says, and then he’s gone.
You climb into your bed an hour later wondering what in the world just happened.
~
You do wear the blue dress to breakfast and you can only gape in the mirror when you realize that it fits perfectly. It has you second-guessing yourself. Had you sent your measurements in advance and forgotten about it? No, you’d only sent a handful of pieces of information to the Lord prior to your marriage and you remembered all of them very clearly. Everything had gone through a messenger, everything had been clear and direct– you would have remembered sending your measurements– you didn’t. So had he just… guessed?
That seemed impossible with how everything fit you like a glove, but it was the only explanation you had. The only one that made sense.
When you join Satoru for breakfast it’s in a sitting room as lavishly decorated as the rest of the castle, but perhaps organized to be a bit more… liveable. He has no plate in front of him, only a tin cup that hides the contents of whatever he’s drinking. You assume coffee or juice. Perhaps he’s just not a breakfast person.
“It fits!” he says. His hands clasp together in front of him and he smiles again, dimples and all.
You nod and fight the heat that bubbles beneath your cheeks as you take your seat. “Yes, perfectly.”
A plate is set before you and a glance up reveals it’s Thomas serving your breakfast. You smile, hoping for some acknowledgement from him, for a small piece of comfort. Instead, you get his averted gaze and quick retreat. Your brows furrow, but before you can say anything, Satoru is back to speaking.
“I hope Thomas treated you well yesterday?”
You glance up, but Satoru’s eyes aren’t on you, they’re on your footman. His smile is bright, but it’s anything but friendly. You fight a shiver.
You glance at Thomas. He’s perfectly still, perfectly straight, but you think you see a muscle clench in his jaw. You clear your throat. “Y-Yes. Thomas was very helpful.” When Satoru keeps staring the boy down you add, “-and very respectful.”
That seems to satisfy. Satoru breaks his stare and some of the tension in the air instantly eases. He shoots you another dimpled smile, this one with a little more warmth. “Perfect.”
There’s a beat and then he’s standing, draining whatever he has in his cup and then straightening his jacket. “Well, I have some work to do. I’ll see you for dinner?” He’s grinning again, like it’s so normal for a man to abandon his bride on their wedding night and then again the morning after. All you can do is nod. He chuckles. “See you then, princess.” And then he’s gone.
~
If this is to be your life you don't know how you will survive it. You spend the day milling about. Through the gardens, through the castle, through the stables. Thomas is never far behind, but any attempt at conversation is nipped in the bud by hit shortness. It’s like he fears coming too close. He’s never closer than a couple paces except when he has to bring you something, only to retreat again as soon as possible. The other servants barely pay you any mind apart from giving you a respectful greeting and then immediately averting their eyes. There is no work to be done, no guests to be had, no parties to plan… and no Satoru. You don’t see your husband once on tour around the grounds. You ask Thomas where his office is only for him to vaguely point out a window in the east tower. You don’t see so much as a ripple in the curtains.
Dinner comes around at the pace of a snail. When it’s finally time to get dressed a lady’s maid whose name you don’t even catch arrives to help you lace your dress. As soon as your corset is deemed tight enough she’s back out the door with a curtsy. Thomas leads you to the dining room and your eyes roam the whole way. Even after having spent the whole day exploring, there are halls and corridors that you’ve yet to step foot in.
The dining room is just as gorgeous as the rest of the place– filled with singular items that could feed entire families for years. Somehow, you think you’ve already grown accustomed to such things, since the only thing you truly care to look at is your husband. Satoru’s already seated, but he stands when you enter, looping around the table to pull a chair out for you.
You give him your most genuine smile, accepting a kiss to your knuckles in greeting before you settle. “How was your day?” you ask as he takes his seat again.
He chuckles. “Perfectly fine. And how was yours, princess?” Your nose crinkles. That’s the second time he’s called you that. Something about it feels wrong. You’re still getting used to being a lady. Princess feels even worse.
“It was… good.”
You watch a perfect white brow arch in the candlelight. “Oh? Just good?” You don’t miss the way his eyes flicker to the corner– to Thomas.
You hurry to elaborate. “Well, I just– I can’t help but feel as if there’s not much… use for me.” Servants flood in, some carrying wine, others carrying trays that hold more food than the both of you could ever possibly consume.
That brow arches impossibly higher. “Use?” His lips crack into that smile again, but it’s tight this time. Too tight. “You have no use. You only enjoy yourself. Surely Thomas has told you that.”
A plate of steaming food plops in front of you. Even its heavenly smell can’t quell the sudden dread in your gut. “Of course! Of course he did.” Your stomach twists and you decide that perhaps now is not the time to press the subject. “I’ll just… I’ll try riding tomorrow.” You hate riding, but it’s the first thing that comes to mind.
Satoru’s smile thaws into something less menacing. “I’m sure you’ll enjoy that.”
You nod eagerly. “I’m sure I will.”
You grab your fork, eager for a new subject. From what you can tell, dinner is roast chicken and vegetables, though it’s the luxury version as everything seems to be. The spices are intoxicating and the green beans are even arranged in a pretty little pattern that makes them look too good to eat. You do anyway. The first bite nearly makes you moan, but you chew slowly, delicately, trying not to let your upbringing show.
It’s not until several bites later that you realize you’re the only one eating. A quick glance reveals your husband has no platter, no chicken or green beans. He’s only… watching you. You clear your throat, dabbing at your lips with a napkin.
“You’re not… eating?”
That permanent smile grows a little wider and you can’t help but feel as if there’s something… menacing about it. “Ate before I came.”
Your brows furrow. “Oh. Were you on the road?”
You think you see something wild flash in his eyes. “No.”
The rest of dinner passes slowly, almost painfully. Satoru doesn’t eat a bite, doesn’t even look enticed. You wonder how that’s possible when it smells like a spice bomb went off in the dining room.
By the time you’ve cleared your plate you’ve discussed everything from the number of horses in the stables to kinds of crops grown on the estate. It’s comforting to know a little more about your new home, but it’s not enough.
“Is there a library?” you ask. You’re on dessert now. It’s the best chocolate cake you’ve ever had and it takes everything in you to hold back a moan each time it touches your tongue.
“Of course.” Your husband’s eyes flicker to Thomas again and you’re honestly starting to fear for the poor footman’s life. Everytime you ask a question it’s like Satoru is angry it hasn’t already been answered. “It’s yours to use as you please.”
You smile lightly. “Perfect. Thank you.”
He softens a bit at that. “Is there anything specific you wanted to read about?”
You shrug. “The estate, I suppose. I should know my home’s history, no?”
His eyes get that wild look again, that sparkle that you know speaks to nothing good. “Oh, absolutely. I have some personal favorites to recommend. I’ll leave them aside for you?”
You swallow and give him a shallow nod. “That would be perfect. Thank you.”
He chuckles. “My pleasure.”
When dessert is finally over, you stand slowly. Satoru’s not far behind you, saying he’ll walk you to your room. Your heart leaps at his words. Will he stay with you tonight?
He offers you his arm in the hall and your mouth runs dry when you feel the corded muscle beneath his jacket. By the time you reach your room, you’re thinking of tugging him in behind you. His denial to stay with you last night was not only confusing, but… off putting. Nearly offensive. Did he not like how you looked? Did he think something was wrong with you?
You muster all the courage you possess and force your lips apart. “Will you stay with me tonight?”
His eyes spark again and you hold your breath. He presses closer. This is it, you think. His lips hover over yours, eyes glimmering in the candlelight. And then he dips his head, his mouth pressing to your pulse.
“Not tonight,” he whispers– and then he’s gone.
~
You wake suddenly. It’s the middle of the night, you gather. The light streaming through the window is weak enough to only be that of the moon.
Your heart is pounding and your skin is slick with sweat despite the chill in your bones. A nightmare, you think. It must have been a nightmare.
As you settle back into your sheets you swear you see a ripple in the darkness. You close your eyes. If your nightmare is real, you’d rather not see it coming.
~
The library is huge. It’s sprawling and smells of paper and leather and everytime Thomas lights a candle you flinch at the idea that one misplaced spark could end thousands of years of knowledge.
The books Satoru left you are… perfect. Just what you were looking for. They’re all comprehensive volumes of the history of the estate, many of which reference each other. You’re stunned to see that several are written by very well-known authors of both the past and the present. You knew the Gojo family’s influence reached far, but not that far. You peruse the titles. The Gojos: A History, A History of the Gojo Crest, History of the Gojo Castle, Revisiting the Gojo Family: A Comprehensive History. Altogether you have well over a few thousand pages of information– but there’s one book that doesn’t fit with the rest. It’s relatively unassuming. A black cover with some sort of gold rune etched onto its front. When you flip to the title page it reads “Creatures of Myth and Where To Find Them”. Your brows furrow. You slide it to the side– must have gotten mixed in with the others, you think.
~
You ask Thomas to bring the books to your room. He does. Very respectfully. He sets them on your bedside table and then retreats like a kicked puppy with only a polite goodbye. You sigh. His behavior has only gotten stranger in the past few days. You think the servants’ coldness must have something to do with Satoru, but you can’t figure out why. Had he ordered them to stay away? Why would he?
You decide it’s a question for another day and dive into your books. You spend hours, days, reading every chapter, page, and word. The pure amount of information is dizzying. Apparently this specific estate had been in the hands of the Gojo family since the eighth century (with several razings and consequential rebuilds). You also learn that Satoru was not only the most wealthy lord on the continent, but the most wealthy man. Even wealthier than the king apparently, though that fact was kept fairly under wraps to protect the crown’s ego. The estimates of your husband’s net worth made your head spin.
Satoru joins you for breakfast and dinner every day. You never see him eat a morsel. It’s… unsettling to say the least. It’s always just that tin cup, filled with something you could never quite see. You develop a pattern of waking in the night, too, with the overwhelming sense that something is watching you. Sometimes you could swear you feel the bed shift as you jerk awake. Each time you simply close your eyes and try your best to slow your heart, convinced your mind is playing tricks on you.
Your days feel a little more productive with a book in your hands, but you’ve read them all three times over by the time a fortnight has passed. You find yourself packing them up to return to Thomas when a certain black cover catches your attention. You grab it from the pile and settle back into your seat. You’ve nothing better to do, right?
You flip back the cover, revealing a familiar title. “Creatures of Myth and Where to Find Them”. You don’t recognize the author’s name. A quick scroll through the table of contents reveals nothing particularly interesting, but you pick a random chapter on ghouls and decide to start there.
It’s fascinating. Nothing about the style is boring and the words fly by. Your silly little myth book is a page turner. By the time you notice the light has started dying you’ve read about ghosts, fairies, werewolves, and goblins– all of which have been a delightful little read. A glance at the clock reveals you have a half hour before dinner. One more chapter, you think. Your eyes skim the title. “Vampires [Vampyr]”.
You skim the first paragraphs until your eyes settle on a line that catches your eye.
“Contrary to popular belief, vampires are not always crazed blood-hungry monsters. Many live among humans quite comfortably and are able to avoid detection with a little well-placed effort.”
You purse your lips. What a… terrifying thought. You skim a little further.
“A vampire’s key characteristic is, of course, their desire and need to drink human blood as sustenance. However, a vampire can be spotted sooner if one is able to recognize their subtler traits. Vampires often have skin lacking any sort of flush. The lack of blood in their veins results in a sickly pallor, even after the most rigorous exercise. Their skin is also noticeably cold to the touch. At best, a vampire’s body will reach room temperature. Vampires can also be noted for their preternatural beauty. They will stand out as the most attractive person in any crowd. Finally, a vampire will have fangs. If one wishes to identify a vampire, one only needs a good look at their teeth”.
A chill settles over your skin. You flip ahead a few pages.
“Vampires are unable to consume typical human food. Should they attempt to, their bodies will immediately reject any and all foreign substances.”
Your stomach drops. You don’t want to think about why. You skip the rest of the paragraph.
“Vampires possess several supernatural abilities that set them apart as a human’s predator rather than their equal. Vampires are known to move unnaturally fast and are notably light footed. If a vampire does not wish to be heard, they will not be. A vampire’s strength is inhuman, well over ten times that of the average man. They also have a penchant for darkness, an ability to hide away in the shadows that cannot be explained. Oftentimes they will seem to appear from thin air.”
You skip ahead again.
“Vampires have been known to take mates. Mates usually come in the form of another vampire, but in some cases a human has been chosen. Vampires are fiercely protective of their mates, bordering on obsession. Any person deemed a threat to their bond or their mate’s safety is usually disposed of quickly. Oftentimes, vampires make these decisions with haste, with little regard for whether or not the threat was real. A vampire will do everything in their power to please their mate, but have been known to forcibly restrain their mates in situations of unrequited feelings. Above all else, vampires wish to possess their mates. Two bonded vampires will sometimes spiral into gloriously destructive fits in their endless desire to protect and possess one another. A vampire bonded to a human will show an increasingly protective nature, often isolating their mate from others.”
Your heart pounds. A bead of sweat rolls down your back. You flip the pages, desperate– desperate for a piece of information that will save you from the thoughts spilling in your mind, from the thoughts you will do anything not to believe. You reach the “Where to Find Them” subsection and nearly gasp with relief. Surely, vampires do not pose as wealthy lords of Europe?
“Vampires can be found everywhere. They do not exist in only one country or continent, but all over the world. Odds are that you have faced at least one vampire in your life, unknowingly or not. Some vampires choose to live solitary lives, surviving in the wilderness where human society will not attempt to tame their wild nature. Others choose to live among humans, some even existing in positions of very high authority.”
No, no, no. This can’t be happening to you. It can’t be real. You’re dreaming, you’re having one of those nightmares again. You’re going to wake up any second.
“One tale recounts a razing of the Gojo estate in the 12th century.”
You’re panting, hyperventilating. This isn’t happening.
“Soldiers of the enemy force recounted a singular man, the son and heir of the then Lord Gojo, taking out a minimum of 800 men. He was described as having his family’s characteristic white hair as well as blue eyes. Eyewitness accounts depict the Gojo heir as covered in blood and killing savagely and with inhuman strength.”
No, no, no.
“(See next page for only existing portrait)”
Your fingers tremble but you can’t stop them. There’s no way. It’s not possible.
You flip the page and Satoru stares back at you.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
You nearly scream. Your door rattles angrily, but you’re not sure you can answer it, not with the knowledge flooding your mind. The knocking continues. You run your hand over your face and smooth down your hair. You feel frazzled, dirty, despite not having moved from your chair all day. Another knock prompts you to set your book aside and stand. You do your best to compose yourself, to put on a straight face. You fail instantly when you pull back the door not to reveal your faithful attendant, not Thomas, but Satoru.
You bite back a shriek and instead force a smile. You’re suddenly very aware of the blood pounding in you veins and of the fact that he most likely knows.
“Hello,” he says, but his voice is lower than usually, more intense.
You force a breath into your lungs. “Hello,” you answer, but it sounds more like a squeak than a greeting.
Something flashes in his eyes, something familiar, something that is no longer interesting but rather terrifying. “Are you alright? You seem a little… flushed.” The concern on his face feels anything but genuine.
“I’m fine,” you answer, but even you can tell that reply too quickly, too eagerly. You rush to cover it up. “Is it time for dinner? Where’s Thomas?”
His lip twitches and you see a muscle in his jaw flex. “Thomas has… left us.”
No. This wasn’t happening to you. There was no way this was happening to you.
“He… what?” There’s an unmistakable wobble in your voice that only causes Satoru’s face to fall further.
“It’s no matter. He’s gone. Now it’s just you and me, hm?” He chuckles and the sound rattles your bones. “In fact, I was thinking I’d cut down on the number of servants we have entirely…”
You mind races with the memory of knowledge you wish you didn’t have. “Vampires are fiercely protective of their mates, bordering on obsession. Any person deemed a threat to their bond or their mate’s safety is usually disposed of quickly.”
You nearly stumble, but lean against the doorframe just in time. Your husband had disposed of a man, all because he brought you meals and books?
“What have you been up to today, princess?” The question breaks your trance just in time for you to see your husband’s eyes flicker behind you.
You wet your lips. “Just some reading.” You plead that he doesn’t ask anything further. He does.
“About the estate?” he asks.
You nod and try to swallow the lump in your throat. “Yes.”
His smile returns and this time it’s not forced. “You got my books, then?”
You try smiling back, but you’re fairly sure it looks more like a grimace. “Yes.”
“Anything interesting?” he presses.
This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening. Does he know? Does he know that you know? “Yes, of course. Lots.”
He pauses and you see the debate and then the decision in his eyes. You think it’s the first time you’ve felt true terror when he meets your gaze again. “I think we should skip dinner tonight. It seems we have so much to discuss.”
You don’t even have the wherewithal to scream when he steps into you, forcing you back until he’s shutting your door behind him. He doesn’t stop there, though. He keeps pressing, keeps pushing until your knees hit the bed and you’re falling to the mattress. He crawls right after you.
“Who knew my little wife was such a reader? All those books in such a short time… You must be simply spilling with information.”
You retreat across the mattress, squeaking when your back hits the headboard and his arms cage your waist. You’re trapped.
His hands find your hips and you’re all too aware of how cool his touch is. Even more so when he pulls you right into his lap.
“Satoru-” your voice is pitiful, breathless, and you’re ashamed to say it’s not just from the fear in your gut. He’s never been this close before, never touched you, held you like this. “Thomas-”
“Don’t speak his name.” His face pulls into the first scowl you’ve ever seen and the sight is enough to root you to the spot. Never have you seen anything more frightening. A creature so beautiful, so perfectly angelic, filled with an insurmountable rage. It’s wrong. “He’s gone. He’ll never bother you again.” He’s closer now, his breath skating over your skin. It’s cool and now you know the reason why.
You shake and tremble and you know– Thomas is dead. Your husband killed him– killed him for getting too close when all he did was stay at a distance. Satoru killed him. Killed him.
He buries himself in your neck, his voice a near whine. “Thought I could put up with it, just so you’d have someone to take care of you…” He groans. “I was so wrong, princess. Couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t stand the way you smelled more like him than me…”
You feel him melt against you then, relief washing over his body in a wave. “But he’s gone. And now it’s just you and me, hm? Just you and me…” He hums, like remembering that fact is all he’s ever needed.
He’s kissing your pulse again, now, and your heart is racing faster than ever. Your fingers curl into his shoulders. You should push him away, away, away. He’s a killer, of thousands no doubt. You’ve never felt at home here, never felt like you belonged. This is why. You’re not even the same species. He’s something else, something your hands were never meant to touch.
Your mind screams at you to do go, to shove and kick at him and leave this place behind. Go, go, go your gut says… but you don’t. You can’t. It’s too… good. The feeling of his cool lips against your skin, of what you’re sure is his tongue prodding at your pulse… it’s intoxicating. He is intoxicating. How could anyone blame you for wanting more of someone, something, so divine?
“Have you figured it out yet, love?” Your breath hitches and he chuckles, licking a long stripe up your neck, before he settles back at your pulse. Always your pulse. “I can feel those little gears turning. Tell me, what have they discovered?”
He knows you know. But he’s going to make you say it. You swallow and feel his grip on you tighten. “You’re…” Your breaths come faster. You can’t. Not aloud. Aloud makes it too… real.
“Yessss?” he prods. He’s licking at you again, all the way across your throat to find your other pulse-point.
“You’re not…” Something sharps nicks at your skin and you bite your lip to hold back a whimper.
“Go on, princess.” You think he’s just smelling you now, just burying his face as close to you as possible and taking you in.
You close your eyes tightly, holding back tears. “Not human,” you breathe. A piece of you breaks with the admission.
He huffs a little laugh against your skin and pulls back to look you in the eye. “That’s good,” he purrs. “But I think you can be a little more specific, no?” His lips press to your chin, then the corner of your mouth, then down to your jaw… “Tell me.”
Your lips wobble, muscles clenching tighter with each passing moment. You don’t want to say it, don’t want to speak it into existence, but you also don’t dare to disobey him.
“You’re a…” You shake and tremble. He draws a line up your neck with the tip of his nose.
“Mhm?”
You open your eyes, thinking this might be the last time you see. “Vampire.”
He chuckles and you feel his teeth press to the skin of your neck. “That’s right, princess. So smart.”
He smiles and you suddenly realize you’ve never seen his teeth before. Everytime he smiles at you it’s close-lipped and dimpled. But this… this is the smile of a predator– all white and pointy and fitted with a set of menacingly long fangs. You sob at the sight.
“Shhhhh,” he coos. He has your chin in his hand, forcing you to truly look at him, to see him for what he is. “I won’t hurt you, love.” You want to believe him so badly it burns, but his laugh washes away any fire and turns it to ice. “Not unless you want me to.” He wiggles a brow like it’s just a little joke, like he’s not an actual fucking vampire that had his fangs over your neck just moments ago.
“Satoru,” you beg. You’re not sure what you’re begging for. Release maybe? But, no, that’s not right. You don’t want him to let you go, not when you finally have him close after all this time. “Why did you pick me?”
The question slips out. You hadn’t even been thinking about it, hadn’t even noticed it scratching at the walls of your mind, but it made its way out nonetheless.
His brow creases, but not in confusion. Moreso in… thoughtfulness. “Do you think about that a lot, princess?”
You nod and you suddenly want him closer, want him to touch you everywhere, hold you like his life depends on it. You want him, no matter how horrible it might be.
He nods and hums, kissing the tip of your nose lightly. “Well…” he says. His thumb swipes over your lips when he leans in to whisper in your ear. “At first I wanted you for this.” His head dips to your neck again and you feel the familiar brush of his lips against your throat. “You smell…” he chuckles. “Like heaven. Which is a place I’ll never get to on my own, so I had to bring my own little slice home, no?” He laughs again, a little louder this time, genuinely amused. “Went into town one day and caught your scent on the street. At first I thought I must be walking past the bakery, but, lo and behold, there was no baker in sight.” He’s still kissing at your pulse, worshiping it. “Went crazy, princess. Didn’t think I was going to be able to contain myself when I found you. Thought it might be quite the scene.” He huffs a laugh and you shiver, somehow both terrified and intoxicated. “But then I saw you–” he groans and something clenches deep at your center. “And I knew I needed more than just your blood. Needed you.” He’s rocking into you now, and your breath catches when you feel something firm against your backside. “Went to you in that little room you slept in every night. Watched you. Couldn’t stay away. Knew I had to have you.” You feel him smile against your skin. “After a week I couldn’t take it anymore. Sent you that letter, married you. Made you mine.” He groans again. “Then I met you and you were so pretty, princess. Already knew it, but hearin’ you talk to me, look at me.” Teeth graze your pulse. “Needed you more than ever. Almost took you right on the fucking floor in here while you were lookin’ at those dresses.” You whine when his hips roll into you again. “Oh, but I knew I couldn’t. You’re so fragile, love. Had to wait, had to make you feel safe, yeah? Spent all this time forcing myself to stay away, ‘fraid of what I might too if I was in your presence too long. Had to control myself. Had to make you realize you could trust me.” He panting, like he’s so pent up he can hardly sit still. “Do you trust me, princess?”
Your brows scrunch. Say no, say no, say no a part of you screams. Run, run, run. You can’t. “Yes,” you breathe.
You feel him smile again, feel the pleasure of submission. “Good girl.”
You’re on your back. It happens so fast your eyes don’t even have time to gasp. You don’t see Satoru, but you feel him. Everywhere. His hands are roaming your body softly, sliding under buttons and laces and popping them off. Your dress loosens with every passing moment until Satoru reappears above you, diving straight for your neck again. “So good, princess. Let’s get you out of this dress, yeah?”
You nod wordlessly, entranced. He finds your mouth as he rids you of your clothes. His tongue presses in and you flail against him, unsure of what to do, of how to handle the intrusion. The kiss is heavy, too heavy, but Satoru can’t seem to stop. He devours you as he gives up on laces and buttons and simply shreds your dress down the back. You tremble when the cold air hits your skin, when his cool fingers dust your collarbone.
“I always forget how many damn layers they make you ladies wear,” he chuckles. His hands run beneath your shift, up across your bare thigh. You gasp at the touch. No one has even been so close to you before. You feel the threads of your corset snapping away, feel your breaths growing deeper. You tremble when he pulls your sleeve down past your shoulder and runs his mouth along the newly exposed skin.
“Satoru,” you gasp, and your hand pulls at his flowing white shirt.
He chuckles, pulling back just enough to see your face. “You wanna see me too?” You nod, lips parted and eyes glassy, and he laughs again. He lips dust over the corner of your mouth. “Alright.”
His hands shift from you to himself, working at the laces on his chest. His movements are speedy, practiced, like he’s been lacing and unlacing shirts for hundreds of years. Your throat tightens when you realize that he has.
You gasp when he reveals himself, when his shirt slides away to reveal an expanse of pale skin and carved muscle. You’ve never seen a man like this and seeing one this close up for the first time is nearly blinding. He’s art, you think- nothing less.
“Touch me, princess,” he says. You can’t. You shouldn’t. He’s too beautiful, too perfect to be beneath your insignificant hands. “Need a little help?” he asks, and there’s a lilt in his voice that makes you sure he’s grinning.
His hands find yours and bring them to his chest, running your palms over his collarbones, his pecs, down, down, down across his abs that you can feel each and every one… You whimper, watching your own fingers grope his skin. He pulls you lower, lower, lower, and you gasp when your fingertips brush the waistband of his pants. But then he’s laughing again and he’s throwing your arms over his shoulders and pulling you closer, kissing your neck like it pained him to be parted from your pulse for so long.
“Not so fast,” he says, like he wasn’t the one nearly stuffing your hands down his pants. His hands are on your corset again. You can feel it dangling onto you by a thread, literally. All he needs is a couple more pulls and you’ll be bare. By the look he gives you, you can tell he’s
thinking the same thing. “You touch me, now I touch you, yeah?” There’s a tug and a tear and then so much… cold. You’ve never realized how cold this castle is, not until you’re exposed to its elements fully. You’re naked.
Satoru sits back on his knees and just watches. His gaze is searing, burning, despite the iciness of his being. It’s too much. Your hands move to cover yourself, to maintain some modicum of your dignity-
“No.” Strong hands find your wrists and pry them apart. “Let me see you,” he says. His tongue darts out to lick his lips.
Your jaw clenches and your frame shakes, but you do as he asks, letting your hands fall limply at your sides. There’s silence for many more moments and it seems to go on so long that you can only squeeze your eyes shut under his gaze. Surely he will turn you away now, get up and leave, tell you this was a mistake, tell you that you’re–
“Beautiful,” he breathes. Your eyes snap open to find him already staring at you. “Beautiful,” he says again, and then he’s on you, lips at your pulse, hands on your skin. His touch is cool and you squeak at the chill that runs up your spine. You’re not sure it’s entirely from his temperature.
His mouth seeks yours and he devours you. You feel as if he’s sucking your soul out through your lips. “Tell me you’ve never done this before,” he begs. “Tell me I’m the first to touch you.”
You whine against his mouth, both aching for more and overwhelmed by what he’s already giving you. “Y-You’re the first,” you whisper.
His groan is deep, primal. It rattles through your chest and you whimper when his hands dig into your waist hard enough to bruise. “Yes,” he breathes, and you shiver again. “Lie back, princess.” Your eyes widen, with anticipation or fear you’re not sure. Probably both. He chuckles. “Don’t worry. I’ll be gentle.”
You pray he means that. “Just relax, love. Here, hold my hand.” His fingers find yours, twining them together. When you swallow, his eyes follow the bob of your throat. He leans back again and your body twitches when his free hand skims the skin of your thighs. His tongue darts out to wet his lips as he finds your knees and you gasp when he parts your legs, revealing you so completely to his gaze. The way he stares, like he’s committing you to memory, it’s nearly enough to make you snap your thighs shut, but a squeeze from his hand reminds you to relax, to trust.
His palm skates up your thigh and settles near your hip, his fingertips inching closer to where you can feel an embarrassing throb.
“Tell me, love. Have you ever touched yourself here?” His fingers dust low on your tummy- just low enough for you to catch his meaning, but not low enough to give you any relief. Your face heats and your teeth dig into the flesh of your cheek. You have, you have touched yourself there, but it’s the last thing you want to admit to your new husband. It’s shameful, it’s dirty, it’s- “Don’t think I’ll judge you, princess. Just wanna know.”
You gulp down a breath. You should come clean. “Y-yes,” you stutter, and the sound of your voice so weak and helpless only makes you flush further.
He chuckles and squeezes your hand again. “On the outside or the inside?”
Your eyes widen. I-inside? You’d never considered that… “J-just the outside,” you answer.
Your eyes grow even wider when his head rolls back and he moans straight up to the ceiling like your answer is heaven-sent. When he looks back to you his fangs are on full display. “Well, I think you and I are in for a little treat today, hm?”
Your brow furrows and your lips part to ask him what he means– his fingers travel those last few inches down your tummy and find your clit. You squeak and jolt so violently that he presses a hand to your hip, holding you to the mattress. “Somebody’s sensitive,” he chuckles. He holds you still for a moment and then lets your hips go free. “Try to stay still. I promise it’ll feel good.”
You nod hopelessly, but this time you’re prepared for when he touches you again. Your muscles clench at the first touch, at the foreign sensation of a touch down there that wasn’t your own. But then it’s more. It’s languid, slow circles around a spot that you’ve never been able to pinpoint so well on your own. It’s heat building in your tummy that seeps through every vein and into every pore. It’s relaxation that you’ve never known, that has you melting into the mattress despite the chill of the touch.
There’s a little huff of a laugh and then his voice. “Good girl. Feels nice, yeah?” You nod hesitantly and squeeze desperately at his hand, searching for an anchor. His head cocks to the side and you watch the smile slide across his lips. “It’s about to feel even nicer.”
By the time you realize what he’s doing it’s far too late to stop him. His mouth closes around your cunt and you yelp, trying to wiggle away from the overwhelming sensation- but he’s got his freehand on your hip again and his grip is bruising, punishing, as he holds you in place. He licks a stripe through your folds and you find yourself jolting again, uselessly so against the pressure of his palm on your hip. “Stop that, princess.” Your heart drops at the admonishment until you feel his guiding touch. “Rock into me like this.” His hand rocks your hips into his mouth and the pressure of his tongue against your clit is so delicious that you whimper. “Good girl,” he says and your heart rises right back up. “Keep doing that, now.” You don’t dare defy him. You rock like he showed you, a little jerkily at first, and then you find a rhythm that has you seeing stars. “That’s it, love,” he says, and the sound is muffled against your cunt. “Here, put your hand in my hair.” He finds your wrist and guides you forward until your fingers are tangling in those snowy locks. They’re even softer than you’d imagined. “Good girl,” he whispers and suddenly he’s taking one last long lick and lifting his head to meet your eyes. “‘M gonna put my fingers in you now, princess.” Your chin wobbles. “It might hurt a little bit, but stay still, okay?” You can’t do anything but nod.
His eyes return to your cunt and you can feel him prodding at your entrance, circling the hole as you clench in anticipation. “Relaaaaaax, love,” he says and you nod. A deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth–
You feel the exact moment he pushes into you and a whine of pain rips from your throat. Your walls clamp down like a vice, angry at the intrusion– but it’s already too late. There’s a beat of silence, of anticipation, and then he’s– laughing?
Your brows furrow when you hear it, your head lifting to a sight that locks your limbs in shock. Satoru’s hand is lifted in front of his face, his pointer finger coated in– blood, you realize. Your blood. And he’s a fucking vampire.
“Oh princess,” he coos, and the manic look in his eyes makes you tremble. “You really are perfect.”
Things seem to slow as you watch him take his blood covered finger into his mouth. You’re sure you’ve never seen an expression more blissful, more lost to sensation. His eyes roll back and his body shivers, like he’s ascending to some higher plane. Maybe he is.
When he pulls his finger from his mouth it’s completely licked clean. You hold your breath. He’s going to go for your neck now, right? He’s had a taste and now he’ll want more of it, all of it?
“Fuck,” is all he says. His mouth is back on your cunt so fast you don’t even see him move.
Your mouth falls wide. It hurts, the way he is so desperately licking at you. You feel his finger again, pressing in, in, in, only to pull back and suddenly be joined by another. The stretch tears at you. You thrash and jolt, but Satoru doesn’t bother telling you to stop this time. His arm wraps over your hips, holding you in place. He seems immune to how hard your legs squeeze at his head or your hands pull at his hair. He’s lost. You can feel him licking, lapping, and prodding at you like you’re a fucking gold mine. He’s lost to desperation, to the need for more, more, more. Every so often he lifts his chin and you see his mouth smudged with a mixture of your wetness and your blood. He laps at his lips like an animal, dragging his thumb across his chin and sliding it into his mouth to make sure he gets every last drop.
You’re not quite sure when the ravenous pain turns to a ravenous pleasure, when it turns from terrifying to downright delicious. You don’t notice your moans filling the air until Satoru joins you, groaning and whining into your cunt and telling you to keep going, to keep making those sounds. The hand you have buried in his hair doesn’t fight to push him away any longer, only to pull him into those now practiced rocks of your hips. His fingers thrust deep, curling into a spot that makes you feel so good and his mouth has found your clit again. He sucks your nerves lightly between his lips, tongue swirling in little circles. Your thighs start to shake.
“Yes. Yes. Give it to me.”
“S-Satoru–” you breathe. Warmth and tightness pool in your tummy, and you recognize it as your approaching orgasm, though you know this one will be far different than any you’ve ever managed to give yourself. Your body shakes and your breaths tremble and then– you fall over the edge, rocking your hips senselessly, losing all form of rhythm. Warmth tingles in your spine and seeps all the way down to your toes. You think you cry out, cry for your husband, cry for more, cry for less, but if you do you don’t hear it. All you hear is the pounding of your pulse, of pleasure throbbing in your veins until the world slowly seeps back in through the corners of your vision.
Satoru is grinning. A speck of your blood clings to his chin and his fangs peek out from behind his lips. The sight makes your blood run a little colder. If any part of you doubted what he was before… well, there was no doubt any longer.
There’s a shift between your legs, his hips slotting between them, and you’re suddenly snapped back to reality. From the look in his eyes, you’re not done.
Frantic hands find his pants and he undoes each button with a quickness that is almost inhuman. You wonder if he could go even faster, if he’s holding back so as not to scare you. If he is, it isn’t working very well. Fear surges in your veins right alongside anticipation.
“S-Satoru–”
“It’s alright, love.” His hand finds yours without his eyes ever looking up. His grip is just a little too firm, a little too cold. “Just stay still.”
You whimper, but you don’t think he’s paying attention to that, and soon enough, neither are you. His pants slide down just past his hips, just enough. You gasp.
You’ve never seen a man in the nude, never even dared to think about what it might look like, though it seemed you no longer had to guess. His hand wrapped around his shaft, giving one long and slow stroke that made his breath hiss through his fangs. The tip was flushed, angry, and leaking something that looked clear and sticky. You couldn’t help but notice it was a lot thicker than a finger, or even two. If his fingers had hurt…
He moves with that alarming quickness again, leaning down to hover over you, chests nearly pressed together. “Gonna take you now, princess. Gonna make you mine.” His eyes bore into yours, blue and shimmering with something wild. His hand presses into the mattress beside your head. “Stay still, now.”
It’s all the warning he gives you. You feel like you’re splitting– straight up the middle. You wail, hands flying out to claw at his back. It hurts. It hurts.
“Satoru, p-please! It’s–”
Lips catch yours– hungry, feral. The kiss is not gentle, not soothing. It shuts you up, it keeps you quiet, it keeps you still as you feel him sinking further, deeper into you. It’s too much, you try to say, but the poke of sharp teeth against your lips keeps you silent. Your hips jolt and wiggle trying desperately to escape the stretch but it’s no use. By the time he’s fully inside you, tears are streaking down your cheeks, fat and heavy. His lips break away and his eyes reappear. You shake when you see that none of the wildness has been tamed, that you’ve only just begun.
“Good girl,” he coos, and a cool finger traces a line across your jaw. “Took me so well.” You hold back a sob when his hips shift a little, testing, prodding. He must see the pinch of your eyes, the twist of your mouth, because he’s quick to comfort. “Just hold my hand, princess.” His hips rock in earnest this time and you whimper, squeezing down on his hand with all your might. You’re panting as he chuckles. “Breathe, love. Breathe. Soon you’ll be begging for more,” he laughs. It’s not long before he’s rocking into you sincerely, setting a pace that stretches you to the brink of breaking. At first it’s all you can do to grasp onto him, to bite your lips through the whimpers and hold his hand. And then it’s… more. It’s heat and warmth despite the coolness of his body on yours. It’s sensation and… pleasure. He laughs when the first moan slides past your lips, burying his face in your neck once again. You hear him at your ear, panting his hot breath across your skin.
“Feel good, princess?” You nod, letting your hips rock against his as he showed you before. It feels good– it feels right. He chuckles, but there’s nothing light about the sound. “Wanna feel even better?” Something sharp pokes at the skin of your neck, hard enough to make you squeak, to make you freeze at what you know he wants.
He pulls himself back, pressing his forehead to yours, searching your eyes with his. Something like a cruel smile dances on his mouth. “Just a taste, love. I promise it won’ hurt.” His tongue darts out and licks across your lips, his thrusts rocking just a bit faster. “You’ll feel s’ good an’ I’ll only take a little.” He laughs again and it sends a chill through your bones. “Promise.” He sounds breathless, like he’s struggling to restrain himself. The increase of his pace makes you whine and you squeeze his hand again. He buries himself back in your neck, panting. “Come on, love. Say yes. Say yes f’ me.” Your eyes glaze over. Your body justles with each new thrust. He’s desperate now, seeking a release that you don’t think is any kind you’re familiar with. “Yes, yes, yes,” he chants in your ear. You’re not sure when his words twist in your mind, when they settle on your tongue and push past your lips, but you know it feels so right when they do.
“Yes,” you whisper.
His fangs clamp around your pulse. You scream when the sting rips through you, violent and savage– but it only lasts a moment. Pain fades to… ecstasy. You feel his throat bobbing with each swallow, feel your blood seeping from your skin and onto his tongue. You’d thought it would feel slicing, draining, like the life was being sucked from you. It doesn’t. It feels wonderful. Heat spreads under your skin, emanating from your neck and down to your toes. It feels like breathing for the first time, like sugar being pumped into your veins. It feels like heaven. Your hand tangles in his hair, holding him close. You don’t want it to stop, not ever. You could die like this, have him suck every last drop of blood from your veins and thank him for it with your dying breath.
He’s moaning now, hands curling into your hips while he fucks into you relentlessly. The pace is grueling and brutal. You know it should hurt but only feels perfect. Anything less would not be enough. Anything else would leave you wanting. You feel it building, feel that familiar twinge at your core. The ecstasy flooding through your veins has it coming faster, has you teetering on the edge in moments.
“Satoru…” You hadn’t noticed how dizzy you felt until you tried to speak. You wonder why… “‘M gonna…”
He fucks you harder, something menacing and deep rumbling in his chest. The sound makes you shiver, makes you whine, makes you come.
Your body shakes and a cry rips from your throat, cunt clenching like a vice around him. Your eyes roll back, hands scraping trails down his back. Your thighs quake with the intensity, with the overwhelming senses of pleasure that erupt throughout your body. Every nerve is firing, every hair rising. It’s an unstoppable current, one that sweeps you away, helpless to its pull.
His thrusts grow sloppy and untimed. His grip on your hips tightens, holding you in place while he makes you his. His teeth break from your neck and when you look up through blurry eyes you see his head thrown back, your blood streaming down his chin in thick little globs. You feel it when he cums, feel the thick ropes of it seeping into your womb, feel the way he keeps fucking you, pushing it deeper and deeper inside. He’s moaning, chanting your name like a prayer at the heavens.
When the moment ends he slumps over you, eyes half lidded and tired. There’s a familiar grin on his lips, one that inspires both comfort and uneasiness in your gut. You can’t help but stare at him, at the blood that stains his chin and cheeks, that reddens his lips so beautifully. You want to reach out and touch him, touch his blood-soaked skin and see what it feels like, what it tastes like. What you taste like.
His eyes slide to the side, finding your pulse again. You groan. Yes, you think. Please, yes. More. You don’t think you’ll ever get enough of that. Of his teeth in your flesh, of the euphoria flooding your veins. More, more, more, your mind chants.
He chuckles lightly and shakes his head. “No, princess.” He raises a finger to trace the curve of your neck. “I took more than I should have…” His expression doesn’t tense with worry. His cheeks pull into a smile, those little dimples shining through. “But what can I say? You just taste so good.” Like he needs to emphasize his point, his tongue darts out to trace his lips, lapping up some of the remaining blood on his chin. “You taste like mine.”
You whine. More, more, more. It’s all you can think about. You lift an arm weakly. You want to pull him to your neck, to make him drink, to make him fill you with the heaven you had just moments ago.
He catches your wrist and brings it to his lips, inhaling deeply. His lips split into another grin and you see his eyes spark again with the wildness you crave.
“Not yet, princess.” he coos. “But soon.” His smile grows even wider, until those fangs are on full display, until you’re trembling again. “Forever,” he whispers.
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