#i'm just not totally sure what the new stuff would be. i've already been fucking around with some of it though

[numetaljackdog]

The funniest part of your rebrand is the way you replaced your posts tag

lmao i'm inclined to agree with that. i did just that part as an april fool's bit last year too, with a post saying that i thought haunted was actually a mid song. everything else for this year's thing was like a last-minute thought

[bunniesanddeer]

Hate (Alastor x Reader)

Hey, awkward haha. This is only my second attempt at smut, inspired by the lovely @hazelfoureyes. (If you want me to untag you, I totally will).

Obviously minors, DNI.

I'm normally not comfortable with this stuff, mostly because I don't have a ton of experience writing it. I decided, that for practice, I would try writing something where the reader doesn't like Alastor. I figured a dynamic that was different from what I normally wrote might help me learn how to get better at writing smut. So here is something inspired by the best smut writer, about a dynamic I've never written :) Also, my first time writing PiV, so sorry if it sucks :) be gentle with me, lol

Hate

Pairing: Alastor X Reader

Warnings: Reader HATES Alastor, Enemies to enemies with benefits, heat, smut, 18+, Alastor speaks French, praise kink, fingers, PIV.

Word Count: 3,818

You could feel it building. The heat rising and coursing through every inch of you. The way it settled in your core, at the pit of your belly. The twinge and ache in your chest. The pressure behind your eyes. The delirium in which you processed it. It was as much as you could take, and you could feel the tension building.

You hated him. You hated him with every inch of yourself. It was a hate that suffused your bones, that dripped through clenched teeth, and twitched tightly gripped hands. You hated him entirely. It wasn’t just the way he talked, although the pompous air and the two-faced words he spoke with angered you to no end. It wasn’t the way he dressed, despite the fact that it was an out of style suit that he preferred, that pissed you off at even a glance. You knew it wasn’t the way he looked, because as much as you hated the sight of him, he was an admittedly handsome demon and had likely been a handsome man; he had dark skin, and fluffy red hair that framed his sharp face nicely. No, it was something deep inside, that you couldn’t quite explain, that made you despise him so, so much.

Alastor was not a good man. No, it wasn’t exactly the best way to judge those that were already in Hell, but among the many denizens you’ve met, he was surely high on the list of fucked up crimes. Sure, he claimed he had a moral code that he strictly followed, but if no one knew what it was, what the hell was it good for? Maybe it was his hypocrisy. The way he held himself and looked at others with such disdain, and yet he was just as lowly and weak and corrupted as everyone else.

Alastor was a hypocrite, for sure, but maybe so were you. How else could you explain this? Who were you to judge him, for all his faults, when yours were staring you in the face? 

Your thighs ached. You could feel the pain growing, and you knew it would only get worse. You had been around him long enough now, that the cursed body you had been gifted had caught on, and now you would suffer for something you never agreed to. 

It hadn’t even been a thought, when you moved into the hotel. You hadn’t thought about the fact that your form and his might affect one another. How were you supposed to know it was a possibility when you’d never run across another deer demon, let alone a Buck? Hell, quite frankly, hell. Each new, fucked up thing, you found brought you greater misery. Now your own body was a prison. You’d take having periods again, if it meant you didn’t have this terrible thing.

When it had first started, only days before, you had sought out Angel Dust, who had laughed at you. 

“Ha! Are you pulling my chain, toots?” He had asked, his tone filled with bewilderment. “C’mon, you gotta know! You’ve been here for years!”

But you didn’t know, and when he caught the anxious look growing on your face, and the fidgeting of your hands, he sighed. 

“Shit, ya don’t know, do ya?” Angel put one of his many arms around your shoulders, and guided you to his room. He settled you on a plush bean bag, and offered you something to drink. You shook your head, anxiety making your face tingle. “Suit yourself, babes.” He sighed, and scratched the back of his head. “It’s called heat. Some folks don’t got one, some do frequently, and some are seasonal. For folks who got it seasonally, it tends to, uh, depend on whether or not ya got someone, you know, compatible.”

You cocked your head as you scratched and pulled at a stray thread on your pants. 

“You gotta find someone with a similar build to yours. If you ain’t ever seen another deer, it might be why it hasn’t come up, babes.” His words clicked in your head, and your face paled. 

“No,” you said, chest frozen at the thought. It hurt suddenly. Your hands tingled, and your chest hurt. What was happening? “No, no, no. Absolutely not, please tell me it’s not because-”

Angel winced, and gave you a pitying look. “Yeah, it’s cuz of Al, doll.”

You gasped for breath, and you shook. You couldn’t think clearly. Everyone knew how much you and Alastor hated each other. You made it clear, and his constant badgering and rude behavior seemed to solidify it for everyone that it was mutual. But for your body to betray you, for him? This felt like the ultimate Hell.

When you started crying, Angel had soothed you to the best of his ability. The next morning, after falling asleep in Angel’s many arms, he gave you an unopened toy, and told you to gather supplies. Enough to hoard up in your room for a few days. He promised to run interference for you, and sent you on your way. 

So here you were, writhing on your bed, on day three. Your sense of smell was increased, and your ears twitched at each subtle sound in the hall. You had tried putting on some mindless show so you could stop focusing on all these extra sensations, but it didn’t help. The extra voices, all not his, sent your head spinning. You had turned it off after only half-an-hour. 

Your thighs rubbed together, and sweat dripped down the back of your neck. You pushed your face into a pillow and groaned. You had avoided it thus far, but it might be time to break out the little vibrator. 

Eventually, you sat up in your bed, ignoring the blankets that you had pushed to the floor the day before. You huffed, and reached for the toy that had been plugged in the night before. You gave the strange pink toy a squeeze, the soft silicone giving just slightly, and made your way to the bathroom. While you washed the toy, you tried to convince yourself that this was all you needed. One good vibe session, and you’d be back to normal. You were wrong.

It was hot. The whole room was unbearably hot. You were covered in a thin layer of sweat, and your clothes had long found themselves on the floor. You had needed to recharge the toy one already, and it had only been a day. The water in the shower couldn’t get cold enough to cool you down. Your core ached, constantly, and your thighs had a near constant mess of slick spread along them. You were delirious with the unfathomable sensations you had been unwillingly wrapped in. 

With a cry, and your soaked fingers at your clit, you orgasmed, weakly. The release wasn’t nearly enough. You twisted, and bit down on your pillow as you cried, just a little. This was terrible. And all because of Alastor. You thought of his nasty jokes, and how cruel he could be. You thought on sharp eyes, and sharper smiles. You thought of his claws, and a soft grasp around your throat, slowly tightening as a normally clear voice grunted and huffed. You pulled your vibrator out again. With something in you snapping, you kept thinking of his slim hips, and broad chest. The way his hands twitched and grasped at his microphone. His leer and the way his eyes followed you when you walked into the room. His laugh, when he was angry with someone. The way he had shown you to handle a weapon before you fought the angels. The angry look he gave you when you yelled at him weeks later. You thought of his hands wrapping around your wrist, and his chest hovering over your back as lithe hips pressed against your ass. 

You came with another cry, the white-hot feeling surging through you. 

Shame filled you up. You were a hypocrite too, it seemed. 

It was dark. Your head was fuzzy, and you couldn’t place the time of day. You sat up, the room spinning as your heart settled. Something smelled good. Your eyes fluttered as you took it in. After a moment, you flicked your eyes around the room, and in the chair by the window was a figure. 

You screeched. It wasn’t terribly loudly, but it made the figure twitch. You dove to the lamp by your beside, and quickly flicked it on. As the warm light filled the room, it flashed across his eyes, and the look alone made you gasp.

“Alastor?” You whispered. What the fuck was he doing in your room?

“Oh, ma bichette.” His voice was rougher than normal, something dark tinging it. 

“What the fuck are you doing in my room, Alastor?” Despite the yearning in the pit of your belly, and the aching you had suffered through for days, this was beyond not okay. Alarm bells were ringing in the back of your head, and you couldn’t fathom why he would break into your room.

“Oh, ma chérie. I have felt that burn for days, and in your absence it grew worse.” His head cocked, and his eyes flashed in the light again. His hair looked strange, as if it was nearly damp. Something in his smile was unhinged. Your chest tugged and ached, and you had to fight to focus through the tingling in your fingers. “I could smell you, and this ache, this hunger I have never known, only grew worse.”

He stood from the chair, and you leaned back on your hands, ready to twist and run if you needed to. His tall form drew your gaze up his shape. Your mind struggled to focus on any one thing, and it was hard to hold onto your anger, like this. 

“It is impolite, to come in like this, but I need. And I can tell you do too.” He walked towards you, and leaned over you. Your conflicting feelings about the situation caused you to hesitate. You leaned back, your back meeting your sheets, and your knees bent, as if your legs could stop him from advancing. You were right, in that they would not, because a moment later, he was crawling over you, forearms flat on either side of your head. “I will leave if you ask it of me, my dear. But I ask that you let me pleasure you,” he whispered to you. His sharp teeth clacked as he glanced over your form. “Let me relieve us of this.” 

One of his hands brushed some of your damp hair from your forehead, and the look on his face nearly flat lined you. He looked so strange. You couldn’t pinpoint what it was. His eyes were soft and gazing at you with some unknown feeling gleaming in them. His mouth was slanted, and his teeth glittering in the low light — Your train of thought halted as you realized he wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t smiling. What the fuck? What could have done that? Your eyes widened, and you could only stare as his thumb strayed to your lips and tugged at the bottom lip. 

“What do you say, my dear?” His gaze caught yours, and you could barely breathe.

“I hate you,” you said. “I hate you, especially for this.”

Something flickered across his face, but he didn’t pull away. “I know, mon cœur. You have many reasons, but this isn’t about that. I merely wish to ease our suffering. Your suffering.”

You wanted to cry. How fucking dare he? How dare he be so terrible on a daily basis, and yet so kind now? You wanted to scream. You could feel tears pricking at the corner of your eyes. It felt so unfair. But you were desperate, and he was offering to touch you, something he didn’t like to do. You knew his reputation, his dislike and disregard for things of a sexual nature, and yet here he was, crossing that boundary with you. (Something in you hurt, knowing that someone who hated him would be crossing that line with him, not someone who loved him or cared for him in any capacity. Maybe that was his Hell). 

“Fine. Fuck. Fine. We can fuck, just, I don’t know. No kissing. And I uh, I’d like to be on my belly.” You didn’t want to look at him. (You knew it was the thought of him that got you off so many times, but the idea of really seeing him, bothered you in a way you couldn’t explain). His face twitched, but he nodded. 

“I understand, ma bichette.” He pet your hair, again, and rubbed a thumb across your forehead, and he took a deep breath in. “Alright, dear, ass up.”

Your eyes widened, and you gulped down the little moisture in your mouth. With deep, steady breaths, you turned over, maneuvering on the bed with twitching limbs. You pressed your chest against the bed, aching at the tenderness in your breasts. Your hands held onto the sheets tightly, and your ears twitched and pressed flat against your skull. Your tail sprung straight, and you could hear Alastor let out a breathy chuckle. The sound of clasps and zippers coming undone made your tail wag, and you could feel one of his hands swat at the fluffy bundle of fur at the base of your spine. 

“Excited, dearest?” His voice carried in the quiet room. You couldn’t reply with words. You were so conflicted. You hated him acutely, and yet here you were. Something akin to giddiness was building in your chest. Your tail wagged harder. You hoped he didn’t take it as an answer. 

You could feel his warm body lean over yours a moment later. He was so much bigger than you. It was clear with how wide his shoulders were, and how his long legs cradled yours easily. One of his forearms settled beside yours, and his face rested in the crux of your shoulder. Sharp teeth lightly grazed the skin there, while hot breath fanned over your back. Soft touches on the swell of your ass, creeping over your hip, and then cupping your mound softly. (How could he be so soft in this, and yet so harsh? Your mind was buzzing so loud). 

“Stop thinking, mon trésor.” His finger grazed your clit, and your mind went quiet. Oh, you had forgotten what it was like being touched by someone else. 

His fingers moved with focus from there, and your legs twitched. You huffed, and closed your eyes, letting the sensations fall over you. Soon, with the gentle touches getting firmer, and more precise, your thighs were getting slick. Small sounds left your clenched teeth. (It felt good, but the petty part of you wanted to deprive him of the satisfaction of your noises). 

Alastor’s hand moved, and suddenly one finger was sinking into your heat. You groaned, and your back arched. 

“Oh, continuer ma chère. Je veux vous entendre.” His voice is coarse, but his finger curls, and you can’t even try and translate his whispered words. Your body trembles as he slips in a second finger. His thumb catches your clit, and your mind is a muddled mess. Your resolve to remain silent shatters, and your voice leaves your throat with no control. 

“Oh, Alastor,” you say. Your eyes flutter, and you clench down on his fingers. He grunts, and thrusts them a little harder. 

“When you are ready, my dear, come for me. And then we can move on to the main event.” His words attempt for nonchalance, but the way he struggles to get them out has you internally laughing. It stops when his erection, clear as day, rubs against your ass. Your hips twitch, pressing against him. “Oh,” he grunts. “Not yet dear.”

He twists his hand, and presses his chest against your back. His hand on the bed grabs at yours, and he intertwines your fingers. Teeth scratch at your shoulder, and the sudden flood of sensory information sends you over a line you didn’t know you were near. 

“Ah! Alastor,” You cry, and fire flicker up your core, and in your veins. You clench hard on his fingers, and his ever present static swells in response. (Although, with how much your hands and face tingle, it could be in your head). 

“Oh, yes.” His head settles against your shoulder blade, and his hand slowly pulls from your core. His wet fingers graze your hip with soft touches, and the hand holding yours rubs softly. “So good for me, dearest. My doe. So good.”

Your chest aches, and you want to cry. How fucking dare he hit the fucking nail on the head? Your breath hitches, and you have to work to not cry. 

“Oh, my dear.” He sits up, and the loss of his heat nearly makes your tears fall. You can’t fathom why you’re suddenly emotional, but it won’t waver in its intensity. His face settles in your sight line. “Are you alright, dear?” His lets go of yours, and cradles the back of your head. “Did I hurt you?”

You want to cry. Fuck him. Fuck this. How dare he. A tear slips before you can stop it, and his eyes narrow, something nearly concerned looking, crossing his expression. 

“No. Fuck you. I hate you,” you can barely finish the sentence before a hint of a sob leaves you. “I hate you. I hate you. Just fuck me already.”

His brows furrow, and the red of his eyes glints as he manages a nod. “If that’s what you desire,” he says, and then he’s behind you again. 

His hands are on your hips, and you hear skin against skin, and then he’s gently prodding you with the thick head of his cock. Alastor presses his cock into your soaking entrance slowly, and you worry about his size for a moment. But then, he’s pressing more firmly, and your thoughts halt. Electricity is shooting up your spine as he sinks into you. You internally thank him fro prepping you with his fingers, because he’s packing more than you would have expected. 

A sharp breath from him, and then his hips snap against yours. “Hah, sorry, dearest.” His breaths are rough, and you feel his hands squeeze your hips hard. “I had intended to go slower, but this is-” He bends over you again, and his chest is against your back, and he’s grasping at the sheet with you. “You’re so good, my dear. Better than I could have ever-”

His hips snap again, and your body jolts. You gasp as he presses his hips against your ass, pushing as far he can get. You feel so tight. Everything is hot, and all you can think about is him. Your tail brushes against his belly as he starts to set a rhythm. All the pain you had been in, and you were starting to feel like it might have been worth it. 

One of his hand wraps around your waist, over your breasts, and his hand settles on your neck. “Let me know if you wish me to stop,” he huffs, and then he’s squeezing your throat, just slightly. 

You mewl, and roll your hips against him. “Oh yes. Little doe. You are so good for me.” The way he says makes you moan again, and you huff as he squeezes your throat again. 

The pace he sets is just under what you need, and it makes you hate him more. Part of you knows what he’s waiting for, and you dread it. It’s within mere moments, though, that you cave, and open your mouth.

“Alastor, please,” you say. Your voice is weak, with how hard it is to take a full breath. Your body is pressed into the mattress, and with the stinging breaths you attempt to take with each thrust, and the light squeeze of his hand around your neck, you struggle. 

His hand loosens, as if he can read your mind. “What is it, dearest,” He asks. “Use your words. I know you can.”

You sigh, and nearly yell at him when his hips stop, giving you time to speak up. You roll your eyes, and nearly beg, “Please, just a little faster.”

You can hear the smile when he responds, “Of course, my doe,” and then his pace starts up again, faster, and just a tinge harder, than it had been before. Your toes curl and your hands grasp at the sheets. 

That heat was growing again, low in your belly. Your thighs were aching, and your back was as arched as you could get it. Sweat was dripping down your back, and all you could think is that you wanted more. 

“Alastor,” you moaned, and grunted back. As you clenched down on his cock, the heat grew, and you could feel tight wires wrapping around your core.

“Oh, ma biche, tu es si bonne pour moi.” His fingers found your clit again, and he rubbed with focus. “So good. You are so good.” He kept repeating it like a mantra, and you couldn’t handle it anymore. 

The wires snapped, and your body went white-hot. You couldn’t see, and you stopped being able to hear more than garbled syllables and the rhythmic thumping of the headboard against the wall. 

Your body went taut, and you clenched down. You could hear his voice grow sharp and ragged, but nothing more as he kept thrusting. 

When you finally settled enough to focus your hearing, you could hear Alastor muttering to himself. And then he went still. “Do you want me to leave my seed in you, or no?”

Your breath caught. Fuck, you hadn’t thought about that. Without thinking too much, you whispered, “In.” 

You watch one of his hands tighten on the bed, sharp claws piercing the fabric. (you’d make him replace it for sure, jerk). Without much warning, he starts his pace again, his thrusts nearly brutal. His grunts and murmuring start up again, and it’s only moments before you feel him twitch, and then heat filling you. He curls around you, head pressed between your shoulder blades. 

You stay sitting like that for a few minutes, before he slowly extricates himself from around you and pulls his cock from your slick entrance. When he returns with a warm, damp rag and cleans you up, you refuse to make eye contact. When he picks up the dirty sheets, and bring you clean ones, you stare at the floor. It’s when he brings you water, and tucks you into bed, you finally look up at him.

“I hate you,” you tell him. 

His face is neutral, and he nods. “I know.”

“This changes nothing,” you say. 

And he nods, letting his normal smile pop back on his face. “I know.”

Hi, please let me know how this was? I'm really awkward about this kind of stuff, and it makes me a tiny bit anxious. Anyways! I hope you liked it. Should I add an 18+ taglist? Also, I have a few asks and stuff that will be posted soon. House hunting has been going terribly. The market is awful, and I am just sad :(

[becauseimanicequeen]

The Timelines in 4 Minutes

Since the Olympics are finally over, and I have three episodes of 4 Minutes to go on, I thought I would spend some time trying to figure out the timelines.

I'm someone who figures out what I want to say by writing it out, so this post will most likely be me "thinking out loud" and drawing conclusions as I go, and then, at the end, I'll have a clearer view of the timelines (hopefully).

(This is most likely going to be one long-ass post, so beware.)

Let's start with some initial notes before I dive into the fun stuff.

The contents of this post may be influenced by some of my theories (pre-premiere theories, episode 1, episode 2, episode 3), and I might come up with new ones as I write this post (they will be highlighted in purple so possible readers of this mammoth post can choose to ignore them if they want, lol), but my focus is primarily on the timelines themselves and, perhaps, on the passing of time throughout the episodes as well.

As I start this post, I believe there are 3 timelines (which are subject to change as I continue to write):

The present timeline, which is what starts off both the 1st and the 2nd episodes (these are events from the future from our current vantage point).

The 4-minute timeline, which is where Great changes things (I've previously called this the OOBE timeline, since I believe Great is having an out-of-body experience and is "reliving" his past).

Then there's a possible third timeline (I've previously thought it might've been the real past, which showed us events that actually happened in the past paralleled with the 4-minute timeline) but I'm most unsure about this one, so I'll just call it the 3rd timeline until my thoughts are more clear about it.

Now... Where the hell do I start?

Time

It might be a good idea to start with the clues that there are different timelines at play and then dive deeper into the episodes to figure out what's happening.

Besides the obvious clues that Great is sent back in time when he has his moments of the 4-minute phenomenon (4MP), there are other clues that different timelines are at play.

The first clue shows up in the Korn and Tonkla scene from the 1st episode and all the way through to the scene where Korn drops Great off at his place after their family dinner.

This is where I'll be crazy about the details (but I'm a hundred percent sure they matter, especially since this whole show is about time), but if we look at Korn's watch when he arrives at Tonkla's place, it says 7:15-ish pm.

Later, when Tonkla wants a second round, it says 8:55 pm.

Then they get interrupted because Korn's dad wants him home for dinner. They have their family dinner, and then, when Korn drops Great off at his condo after dinner, Korn's watch says 7:15-ish while the clock on Great's phone says 07:13.

(Great already has issues with time, which I believe is the effect of him having a cardiac arrest at 11:00 in the present, but the time anomaly in this particular sequence is different than Great seeing 11:00 and counting when he's alone.)

This whole sequence is meant to be the same day Great hit Manee with his car. All of them (even the dad and Great's mom) are wearing the same clothes they wore when introduced throughout that very same day. Yet, the times on the visible watches and clocks tell us something strange is going on.

(Could this just be me overanalyzing the watches and clocks? Sure. But the interesting thing is that the time is still consistent in the sequence with Korn and Tonkla. It would make sense that they talk, then fuck, and then lie there butt ass naked and cuddling for a total of 1 h 40 min. And, again, considering this show is about time, I trust that the creators have been meticulous about those details, even if it means changing the time on the watches and clocks for every new take if needed.)

Considering what I wrote above, I might start calling the 3rd timeline Tonkla's timeline, because I feel like it revolves around him.

Either way, I will focus on the 4-minute timeline and the third one in particular because I don't see a possible 4th one right now (I might by the end of this post, though, lol).

The question is, then, how we can determine which scenes belong to which timelines. I will get to that further below, because first...

Let’s look at some more details I’ve noticed.

Blurry Edges

One of those details is the dreamy, blurry edges (I'm sure there's a technical term for this, but I have no idea what that might be, I'm just guessing that they're adding it in post-production, but don't quote me on that). Much of the show has a dreamy feel overall, but I'm talking about the blurry edges in particular.

I've noticed blurry edges in the following scenes:

When Great feels iffy in the elevator (ep 1)

I'm pretty sure there's some of it happening in the scene when Tyme is treating Manee, both in the ER and in the OR during the surgery (ep 1)

At the family dinner when Great's mom tells him he should go see Manee at the hospital (ep 1)

When Great feels iffy at the hospital before his second 4MP (ep 1)

When Great is sitting in Title's car talking about where View is (ep 2)

I'm not sure about this one since it's hard to tell because it's dark, but it might be used in the scene where Title beats the shit out of Dome (ep 2)

When Great brings Dome into the hospital (ep 2)

When Korn is having a meeting with Fasai and her dad (ep 2)

When Great feels iffy and has his fourth 4MP at the basketball court (ep 3)

When Win reads through Tonkla's brother's social media posts and comments, which is a memory of him doing it (ep 3)

And I'm pretty sure we're getting more of this since there were scenes in the trailer that had those blurry edges as well, for example:

The pattern I'm seeing with these scenes (if we exclude the first scene in the elevator, Korn's meeting with Fasai, and Win's memories, the latter might've had blurry edges just because it was his memory, btw) is that each scene has something to do with Great's 4MP, before the rewind and/or after the rewind.

(Perhaps the reason for the blurry edges showing up in Korn's scene is because he's the possible third character that's having an OOBE. And if this theory is true, there's a possibility that there's yet another timeline/reality/perspective present that entwines with both Tonkla's and Great's timelines.)

There are also the tilting camera shots (mostly showing up in scenes with Great), which I might get into next week as I continue to build on this post.

But, what does all this with the blurry edges mean?

I have no fucking clue.

Perhaps it's just meant to show that things aren't what they seem. Perhaps it's meant to show which characters are experiencing OOBEs (Great, Tyme, and possibly Korn)? Perhaps it's meant to show moments that are affected by Great changing them through his 4MP? Again, I have no fucking clue, yet (but it might start to get clearer as we get more episodes).

So, moving on...

Different Realities/Parallel Worlds/POVs?

There is another aspect to this whole timelines discussion I'm having with myself that I want to bring up. And that's the clues I've found that support the possibility of different realities/parallel worlds/different point-of-views. I'm not sure what to call them, yet.

So, let's dive into the moments I'm referring to and try and figure it out.

The second time Great experiences his 4MP, he goes to the ER's front desk and we're shown the nurse's actual desk where there's a clock that we're supposed to focus on because it's telling us that time will do weird shit again.

The moment Great has been sent back in time (after being in Manee's room), he's standing in the same position, looking down at the clock on the desk, and realizes it's happened again (just like when he hit Manee). However, this time, the things on the desk are different.

The time on the clock is the same, but the mirror is in a different position, 75 has turned to 74 (I'm not sure what these numbers mean), 77F has turned to 76F (which I'm guessing are Fahrenheit degrees), and the pink, blue, and yellow papers are lying on top of the folder the second time around.

If Great was sent back in time to the exact moment he was in before he went to Manee's room, the things on the desk would've been in the same place, right? So, he might not even have been sent back to the reality he was in before this 4MP happened.

Another clue is the sunrise and the sunset artworks on the wall at the hospital. We often see them by the entryway:

Then, in the 2nd episode, it looks like at least the right one is hanging outside Manee's room (which we've seen isn't anywhere near the front desk since Great had to walk around a bend to get to her room in the first episode).

Could they have more than one of those artworks in the hospital? Sure. So, take this with a grain of salt.

(Btw, I find those artworks so fascinating because sunrises are usually cooler (more blueish) while sunsets are usually warmer (more red/orangeish). But from our perspective, looking at them straight on, the warmer artwork has the sun setting in the west while the cooler artwork has the sun rising in the east. And, since the eye in left-to-right reading cultures often automatically goes from left to right, it's interesting that the sunset comes first and then the sunrise. Perhaps it's to show that the world is turned upside down now that Great is having these weird experiences. Or perhaps it's to show that the time between the sunset and sunrise will be important for Great and Tyme since Great watches Tyme pass those artworks (from sunset to sunrise) the first time he has visions of them having sex. But, I digress...)

Another set of clues is in the scene with Great and Tyme sitting on the bleachers by the basketball court and Great has another 4MP in the third episode.

The first time we see this wide shot, there are 5 people (excluding Great and Tyme):

4 of them are wearing white shirts (one with a darker cardigan), and they sit on Great's side. One wears a blue shirt and sits on Tyme's side. This is where Great asks Tyme why he didn't call before coming to the University.

As they continue to talk (and the camera shot is closer to them), you can see the top of the head of a girl walking towards the bleachers. There's also another person walking by, waving, but he's walking right past them rather than towards the bleachers.

Then, as Great thanks Tyme for the Thai tea and gets up to leave, we get this wide shot. The only difference here is that the girl who walked towards the bleachers is now sitting next to her friend. That seems logical, right?

But, then Great has his rewind, and he comes back to the moment where Tyme reminds Great to get his wound treated. Great tells Tyme about his precognition and Tyme tells Great that he will consult with one of his doctor friends. Then, as Tyme stands up to leave, we get this wide shot:

The two girls at the bottom left are in the same position but the girls two steps above and to the far left are different, the boy and the girl next to them are new, and the boy with the white shirt to the right is the same boy that sat on Great's side previously.

Coincidence?

Well... After Tyme tells Great that he can call him Tyme rather than Doctor, and Great says that they should grab something to eat after he gets his wound treated, we get this shot:

Now we're back to the original two girls to the left, there are new boys wearing black on the bottom left, and the boy in blue is back again. That's a lot of moving around in such a short time.

The only things that stay consistent in all of the shots are the bags (except for one of them) and bottles.

So, what's going on? Is this another one of those things that happened at the hospital where Great was sent back to a reality where things were different from the reality he was in before the 4MP?

Is the show giving us different perspectives? For example, Great's perspective before his 4MP, Tyme's perspective when he says he'll talk to Den, and Great's perspective again when Tyme has left? That could work for the hospital example as well since it was from Great’s perspective before the 4MP but turned into Tyme’s after the 4MP as he asked the nurse at the front desk who the guy that bumped into him was.

Or is the show just underlining how strange everything is during the 4-minute timeline (and Great's possible OOBE)?

Well, the latter might not be it because clues like this don't just show up when Great is around.

In the first episode when Korn comes to Tonkla's place, Tonkla's laptop shows he has something blue and yellow on his screen:

Then the screen is black as if it's been turned off:

Later, when it cuts to them lying naked on the sofa, it's just white:

Also, notice how the small spotlight behind the desk is positioned differently and pointing in another direction on the desk than in the first image above.

Could it be that Tonkla simply used the laptop and moved the lamp between them having sex and lying there? Sure. Again, if we look at Korn's watch from the beginning of this whole sequence (7:15-ish pm) to when Tonkla wants a second round (8:55 pm), we know he had 1 h 40 min to rearrange things and do stuff on that laptop.

But, you know, unless the house is on fire, who would move from that spot on top their sugar daddy who is lying there deliciously naked? And especially to do some stuff on a laptop? Fuck technology (the not-so-good kind of fuck) and fuck your sugar daddy instead (the deliciously bad kind of fuck). We all know Tonkla wants to. But, I digress...

Take this detail with a grain of salt if you want to (or a whole fistful). For me, though, this shows that there's a possibility that changes and inconsistencies like this aren't just happening around Great. And (to my crazy mind, at least), that it might be two timelines showing up throughout this particular sequence between Korn and Tonkla.

24 Hour vs AM/PM Clock Settings

And on the topic of inconsistencies... Another thing I want to point out is the inconsistencies with the digital clocks when it comes to them being 24-hour clocks or set to the am/pm thing.

The hospital seems to have a 24-hour setting in some cases:

But not in others:

This could be in the morning, of course, and the darkness outside Manee's window might just be because of the thunder/lightning storm (but I still think it's night rather than morning).

And then we also have Great (who, to be fair, has a special relationship to time in this show), who sees 11:00/11:02 both in the morning and at night:

And the am/pm thing is on his phone when Korn drops him off:

Even though his phone seems to have the 24-hour setting:

More than once:

But, again, Great clearly has issues with time and clocks/watches. So, this might just be a way to show how confusing it is to him.

But, what if it isn't? What if it's an indication that several realities are entwining? (Okay, I feel like I'm going with the term "realities" when it comes to this.)

My Timelines So Far

So, what are my conclusions after watching the first 3 episodes?

At this point, I think there are 3 timelines:

The present timeline.

The 4-minute timeline.

The real past/Tonkla's timeline (which is meant to show us the real past events that happened, most of it from Tonkla's perspective).

Having Tonkla's timeline be the real past is possible considering the inconsistencies in time during the Korn and Tonkla scene and then the Korn and Great scene in the 1st episode.

And before someone says this doesn't make sense because of all the missed calls Korn has (if anyone is still reading this, lol)... Well, that's because Korn exists in both timelines and the scene when he looks at the missed calls in that bathroom in the 3rd episode:

Could be the 4-minute timeline rather than Tonkla's timeline (the real past). That could make sense because all we've seen of Tonkla since Korn told him off over the phone is him waiting by his phone for Korn to call.

We never saw Tonkla call Korn again after being told off.

On the flip side, if Korn is in the real past when he looks at those missed calls in episode 3, it would make sense that when he wants to call Tonkla while he's waiting for Great at the bar (in the 4-minute timeline), the icons on the top right of his phone are different from the phone he looked at in the bathroom:

(Am I getting too crazy about this? Yes. Do I care? No, because it's fun.)

Could he be using different phones? Yes. Could those icons change depending on where he is and what settings he's using? Sure (I'm not familiar with Samsung phones so I have no idea what most of those icons mean). But it could also mean that we're seeing Korn in different timelines in these two scenes, which makes it possible for Tonkla's timeline to show us the real past.

(I personally prefer the option that the scene with Korn looking at the missed calls is from Tonkla's timeline (the real past) while Korn almost calling Tonkla in the bar, and then smiling at his phone as he's going to the bathroom, is from the 4-minute timeline where Tonkla's brother (who I believe is Dome) hasn't been killed.)

Also, I think showing us the real past is a smart way to show us what leads up to Tonkla beating the shit out of someone.

(I believe that scene is from the real timeline, and whoever he's beating with that rock, might have an effect on the things that are happening right now. I'm not sure what kind of effect, though. Perhaps it's a possible third person experiencing an OOBE and "living" in the 4-minute timeline. Perhaps Great is going through this OOBE to prevent that murder from happening after he wakes up (if he ever does). I'm not sure at this point.)

So, that's where I'm at with the timelines after 3 episodes.

And, when it comes to the inconsistencies in certain scenes, the easy answer is that they are just meant to show that this whole 4-minute timeline is an inconsistent mess of (what I believe to be) Great's OOBE.

But, I would personally find it more interesting if these inconsistencies (like all the people around Great and Tyme changing in that scene at the basketball court) are evidence that there is more than one character experiencing an OOBE and that the inconsistencies shown are there because the characters have different perspectives of the events happening.

Now, I had planned to make a flowchart of the scenes in each episode divided into the three different timelines I've written about above. But, I want to get this post out before the 4th episode drops tomorrow, and I just don't have time to make the flowchart before that (or enough images left in this post to fit something like a flowchart in it before I hit the pesky limit). So I'll wait with that chart until next week instead (when I'll continue to build on this post in a reblog).

Waiting to create and post the flowchart until after the new episode tomorrow also gives me another episode to nerd out about. It's a win-win for me.

[yellowbunnydreams]

Do You Need Some Vitamin D? (Part 2) (Incubus!Afton x Oblivious!Reader)

~Hello all! I'm back again...for a bit anyway, just been busy with life and stuff. Hope you are all doing well, I figured you could probably do with something to prove I am actually alive~

@ruh--roh-raggy xp-doggy redbunny03

CW: 18+ MINORS DNI. Fluff, age gap (Reader 20's - William Afton 40's(?)), teratophilia, meet-cute, punny pick-up lines, scenes of working out, minor porn-logic, ditzy! reader, could be classed as bimbo! reader?, size-difference, flirting, monster-lover, sexual innuendos, Monster! AU

Heading to work on the next Monday was certainly uneventful after the interesting text you had received from your boss over the weekend. Somehow, that photo hadn't been saved to your phone, but you definitely didn't keep scrolling back to look at it, admiring the little details about how his strong arms looked in the low light, how tight the shirt seemed across his broad chest. But you thought you had gotten over those thought by the time your shift rolled around.

Until William Afton walked in in that damn shirt.

"Okay, now you're staring." Your co-worker made you jump as they snuck up behind you. Seeing the familiar face of Claire behind you and making you blush and scowl, shaking your head as you turned back to look at Mr. Afton, before realising that he has already gone to the office with a surprising pang of disappointment.

"I'm not staring!"

"You totally were...Was he wearing a new shirt today? I'm not sure I've ever seen him in colour." Claire raised an eyebrow, and you tried to shrug nonchalantly.

"I wouldn't be able to tell you." Claire's eyebrows went higher on her face as she put her hands on her hips, giving you a slightly tilted head look that you knew meant she saw right through you.

"Right...And you definitely aren't blushing right now!" She thought for a moment before her eyes widened, giddily gripping onto you and smirking as you looked slightly confused by her sudden enthusiasm. "You have a crush on Mr. Afton!"

"No!"

"Yes! Oh. Em. Gee! You have a crush on our boss!"

"Faz-fuck off with that! Do you want me to get in trouble? And I don't have a crush, he's just...nice." Your cheeks heating up as you avoided her gaze, but your colleuge simply tutted and wrapped her arm around your shoulder, holding you tight to one side.

"Wow, never pinned you for the type to go for older guys...Why don't you ask him out to the Valentine's Dance?" She teased, earning a sharp jab in the ribs from your elbow and a playful pout from her.

"I'm NOT going to ask our BOSS to the Valentine's party." Earning an eyeroll from Claire as she crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow again. You were sure if she kept doing that, she would be stuck in a permanently surprised expression.

Claire simply shook her head, throwing her hands up in the air as she chuckled slightly, turning to go and walk off to the main floor and direct you towards the prize counter. Looking over her shoulder and smiling wickedly as she shrugged.

"You know, I'm going to ask that DILF out for you if you keep this up. You're going to ask him."

"What the faz-fuck is a DILF Claire?" You asked, staring after her with a mildly confused expression. "Claire?"

Monday's were never busy at Freddy's, so you never had to really worry about keeping ontop of all the niggly little jobs that made you want to curl up and cry; like untangling the slinkies because a kid just have to have that specific one, or a parent complaining that the claw machine hadn't payed out despite their kid 'winning' and having to crawl around for the one specific plushie that you knew they hadn't won but you had to retrieve anyway.

The prize counter was however, mercifully quiet on Mondays, and it also gave you a good vantage point of the employee's only door, where you could see everybody coming and going, including Mr. William Afton.

It was weird, how you noticed him a little more as he stepped out onto the floor today. How that purple shirt was still a little bigger on his frame than the broad man should really be wearing, even though you swore the photo on your phone showed him filling it out, the colour complimented him though. His greying hair swept back out of his face, that greying beard that you found yourself wondering how it would feel if he brushed his cheek against yours... Shaking your head, you quickly snapped out of it, it wasn't appropriate to think that way about him, he was your boss after all.

He however, was thinking similarly about you. Not that you would ever know it aside from the slight smile that curled his lip whenever he looked in your direction. William's heart pounded slightly in his chest as he slowly made his way over to the prize counter, making sure to stop and greet staff and reprimand them if needs be, saying hello to customers. It was all torturous to him as all he wanted was to see you, take his mind off of paperwork for a while and enjoy the soft vanillaish smell you always seemed to have. It was that or cocoa butter, he couldn't decide, but you smelt like candy to him, and it made his mouth water in more ways than one.

You glanced up as a shadow fell across your back, placing out some new prizes with the ticket price stuck on gently with tape. Turning to give your usual greeting before finding yourself looking at a broad chest, eyes wandering up as your cheeks heated and your eyes met intense silver behind gold framed aviators.

"Mr Afton! Nice of you to pop over to see me." William blinked for a second before chuckling, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly and giving you that lopsided smile that made him look quite charming.

"Well, I thought I would come see what prizes are up for grabs...I have a few spare tickets from me getting bored." You smiled back at the thought of him playing the same arcade games and silly games as the kids, such an imposing man being a kid at heart. Watching him stuff one large hand into his pocket as he spoke to you.

"That's great! What can I get you, sir?" Watching his eyes scanning the thick, freshly cleaned glass at all the prizes before his eyes caught something, his smile widening as he reached over the counter and gently pulled a ticket from your vest, your own heart racing in your chest as his thick fingers brushed against your ribs ever so slightly and your eyes naturally followed his hand as he flipped the ticket over to show you.

"Two-hundred tickets for a sweet like you? I'd gladly give triple for this prize." You giggled and shook your head, hair bouncing softly around your face as you touched the back of your own neck. It was silly, he almost sounded like he was flirting with you, but you chalked it up to your silly thoughts about the older man recently.

"I'm afraid I don't think you can own a human, sir, and thanks for picking that off, it must have gotten stuck there earlier." Laughing it off as William paused then chuckled, his smile tightening just a fraction.

"Right...No of course I can't own you. Six hundred Faz-Tokens seems like a measly compensation for a life anyway." He was confused by you again, and it made him all the more intrigued. He thought the flirting was obvious this time, he even called you a prize, asked to own you, implied he wanted to take you home. Yet there you were, barely reacting like it was nothing. The fingers in his pocket laced around a few cherry candies in his pocket, pulling them out and unwrapping one, popping it between his teeth and offering you the other. "What prize would you get, if tickets were no problem?"

Looking at the prizes, you hummed as you considered it, taking the candy with a quiet thanks and placing it in your vest pocket, not wanting to indulge in front of your boss. After a few moments however, your eyes landed on a toy-bonnie plushie and you smiled, pointing it out in the case.

"Spring-Bonnie, he's always been my favourite." William's relaxed smile returned, and he gestured for you to take it out. Counting out the eight hundred Faz-Tokens on the counter, he pushed them towards you and then pushed the plushie back against your chest as you offered it to him, leaving you a little confused yourself.

"Well, I hope he's going to a good home then."

"Sir?"

"He's yours, doll, keep him. As a token of my gratitude for putting up with such a silly old man." Rubbing the back of his neck, you shook your head after a moment, carefully cradling the plushie to your chest as your cheeks heated up once more. Maybe you were developing a cold, or coming down with something..Maybe Claire had been right about you starting to develop a crush on your boss.

"You're not a silly old man, Mr. Afton, I find you quite funny, and you always brighten my day." It was William's turn to blush as he looked down at you, giving that warmest smile that made his eyes crinkle slightly at the corners. You could have sworn you heard the sound of his foot tapping repeatedly against the plush carpet, watching him rock back and forth onto his heels a few times.

"That means a lot to hear, bunny. Enjoy your new friend." With that, he walked off, leaving you clutching onto the yellow velveteen rabbit with the purple bow-tie carefully. Smiling happily to yourself as you thought how you perhaps wished just a little bit that he was really flirting with you.

When you got home that night, you debated for a long time how you could thank William Afton properly for his kind gift. And for the candy too. You carefully sucked on the hard sweet, savouring the almost too sweet cherry flavour as you got changed into pyjamas and glanced over at the Spring-Bonnie plush on your dresser, deciding something for a moment before taking a deep breath.

"Fuck it." You said to the plushie, picking it up and stroking the soft ears as you placed it down on your bedspread, setting it up carefully so that it was nice and presentable before whipping our your phone and snapping a picture. Pausing over your keyboard, trying to think of something subtle and funny to put before sending it to your most recent contact.

William's phone buzzed as he hunched over the bench in his workshop, his thick fingers moving the animatronic parts before him with a practised precision. Shirt changed out for a more comfortable t-shirt and feeling his foot tapping against the floor in no particular rhythm. Lit cigarette burning in the ashtray besides him as one large hand reached out to pick it up and take a drag whilst the other grabbed his phone. Clicking open the message without a thought as he was sure it was from Henry, trying to talk to him about 'his outdated methods'.

His heart practically stopped however, when he saw the picture that had been sent through.

From what little he could see, the bed was a single, the sheets neatly made up and white, able to just make out some form of pattern across the duvet cover. The walls were beige, which surprised him as he had always suspected that you weren't a beige wall person. But what really caught his attention, was the presence of a familiar Spring-Bonnie plush, front and centre to the bedding, tucked against the pillows in pride of place. His silver eyes wandered to the caption quickly as he wondered what you had to say. Had it been a mistake?

'I thought you would like to see that he's settled into his new home. Thanks for the candy by the way, I'm not usually a cherry person but I'm eating it now :)'

William's hand instinctually reached for his pocket, pulling out another candy and unwrapping it quickly and putting it in his mouth. Tobacco and cherry mixing together to create a unique sensation that made his brain light up happily, swearing softly under his breath that he was constantly running out of pocket candies since he had a bad habit of crunching them rather than savouring the taste. Thinking for a moment before he finally replied.

'He looks comfy, Although that bed looks rather uncomfortable for cuddling in.'

You blushed as William mentioned cuddling, but you tried to shake the thought out of your head as you tried to image those large, strong arms wrapped around you, holding you against his chest.

'Well, he's not oversized, so we should fit fine. He's nice and soft! Not like I've ever slept in a bigger bed anyway :p' Climbing into bed, you were tempted to send another picture, but knew that would be overstepping professional boundaries by a country mile. Unknowingly to you, William had the same thought and barely got to snuffing out his cigarette before he practically sprinted up the stairs, feeling his legs changing as he went, feet becoming more elongated and lapine to accomodate his bounding strides. Almost throwing off his slacks and diving into his bed like he hadn't been down in his basement just moments before. The perk of supernatural speed, he supposed.

The next message you received was a photo, another one that brought colour and heat to your cheeks and gave you the start of a fluttering feeling in your stomach as you looked at it. William Afton was in bed, his broad chest obscured by a thick pillow that he clutched tightly with one large hand, his chin rested ontop with a lazy, almost half-asleep smile on his face. Glasses pressed into one side of his nose as you thought it was rather cute and somehow kind of hot at the same time.

'Well, there's always plenty of room in mine if you want to try it for size. Goodnight, bunny, see you tomorrow.' William wondered if he went too far, but it felt right to invite you, to extend the offer and hope you realised just how badly he would rather replace the pillow with your smaller body against his, but he missed your reply, as he soon fell asleep clutching onto the pillow. Holding it and twitching in his sleep as his nose wriggled, dreaming that the person of his obsession was against him instead of an inanimate object.

'Goodnight Mr. Afton. It does look comfy there, but that could be what's in the bed, lol' You knew the older man would definitely not be flirting with you, you imagined him to be more of a flowers and a date kind of guy, rather than pick-up lines. Not that you were entirely sure why you kept having those thoughts about him at all, but as you curled up on your side, you knew that somehow, you had to flirt with the giant man.

[nerves-nebula]

Once I told my friend people that have had experiences with incest deserve a space to work through their shit so it can totally be in art for those purposes, and also some people have weird kinks, it’s fiction, so leave them to their spaces. And like two days later he recounted that I had said people should be allowed to do incest and fuck their families and what have u. Because he didn’t actually listen to what I was saying. He just heard incest and went ew ew ew, and jumped to the absolute worst conclusion. That is why although I tell him everything, I will never open up to him about any of my shit in that area, and also I reeeeeaaaalllyyyy appreciate your openness when it comes to discussing this stuff and putting it in your art. If u weren’t I would simply keep all my feelings on my weird sibling shit inside and die with it, but I’ve actually been able to think about it and work through it. Your turtle art surrounding incest just makes me feel very seen

ok well first this is very sweet so thanks for sharing <3 but now I'm going to dip into my opinion on how ur friend sucks

not sure how to say this other than that I think that's malicious. now i'm not a super forgiving person in the first place (I am the king of hitting the bricks when it comes to relationships. do NOT get attached to me), but i really don't know how you get that out of that conversation without being kind of malicious, or at least coming to the conversation with a pre-established idea of what you think your friend is saying, and then just holding onto it even when they're actually explaining shit to you. which i find repulsive. that's a horrible way to enter a conversation, especially with people who you're supposed to care about.

to me that's at least subconsciously malicious. that's a level of "i'm not gonna hear new perspectives" that would make me think "oh this guy's never gonna be able to understand me" like. you've gotta be pretty stuck in your own mind for that kinda thing.

my bestie has some friends who, no matter how much you talk to them, have already decided how they're going to interpret anything you say. I've told her to cut one of them off for a long time and she's recently actually done it cuz he's just so insufferable, and he can't change unless he decides to.

like if you're so incensed with disgust that you convince yourself of a lie then i think you're a bad person who is not safe to be around. and furthermore i wouldn't still be friends with someone who can't understand that fiction is not real cuz 1) that's insane and 2) that's insanely dangerous if they ever decide something i make in fiction is worth hurting me about

sorry for the rant, and obviously take this all with a grain of salt (I don't know your entire relationship with this guy so i could be way off base here) but you deserve better friends than that. And i am the king of sneeringly deciding people aren't good enough to be my friend lmao.

[greenerteacups]

Hi! Just wanted to say the latest chapter is lovely & amazing & sweet & had me smiling the whole time! I absolutely love your characterisation of everyone, especially Draco, so it was so so lovely to return to this world & to his thoughts!! with his best friend and crush at malfoy manor no less! All the yearning is already off to a great start hehe I am so excited for the rest of book 5!

Wanted to ask you how has it been for you to write this new book and volume? Has your writing process changed since when you’d first begun taking on a long form project like this?

& also are there any moments or surprises in this book that you’re especially excited about?

sending so much love & gratitude for you and your incredible works 💓

Thank you so much! This is really encouraging, I so appreciate it.

Inasmuch as I can use this metaphor without having kids myself, I sort of see each of the books as a different child. The first one flew out in basically a few weeks of very intensive writing, and it was a total dream — plot, pacing, symbolism, major beats, all fell into place basically without effort. The character stuff was the hardest, as I've written about before, but even then, the glorious part of writing beginnings is it's the most energy you'll ever have for a project, so the lows were pretty soft lows. Book 2, in contrast, I had to drag kicking and screaming by its ankle from under the bottommost mattress of my brain. It's one of my least favorite books (tone problem; COS has killer plot/setting/ingredients for a YA novel, but it's stuck in the doldrums of Harry Potter's well-documented Early-Installment Weirdness, before Cedric Diggory slams the gas and upshifts the whole series into its correct age bracket). More specifically, once I'd gone through and picked out everything in the book that happened because of Lucius, I didn't have a plot — hey alexa how do you rewrite Chamber of Secrets when We Got No Fucking Chamber Of Secrets — and oh by the way, even if you want to do a moody tone/political setup book, remember that your protagonists are still twelve, so if you go too dark or too intense, you'll risk torpedoing your readers' suspension of disbelief. Good luck, Charlie.

Book 3 felt the most like its own novel, if that makes sense? It's the last truly feel-good book of the series; it's a great stand-alone mystery novel with relatively low stakes. Plus you get a bunch of the big series icons: patronuses, dementors, werewolves, Hogsmeade, the Marauders' Map, and time turners arithmancy. It just felt like a good old-fashioned motherfucking romp of a mystery/adventure story, before any of the complex character work and major stakes of the late books come in.

Book 4 was the most fun I've had writing anything maybe ever. I don't even know what it was. Maybe the tournament arc, honestly? Love me a tournament arc. But in any case, I opened every new chapter feeling a tingle of excitement for what I was gonna get to do. Oh, and the romance started, finally, Jesus God (if it feels like a slow burn reading, just imagine what it felt like writing it, when everything takes ten times as long, and you have to figure out how to word the fucker.)

Book 5, in contrast, has felt much less like that tingle of "here we go!" and more like "oh, man, this is gonna be cool." Because this is the arc of the story that composed the original idea for Lionheart, literally years ago, and to be honest, I didn't think I'd get this far! If you'd asked me "do you know that it's going to take you 500,000 words of backstory before you can start writing that concept you're thinking about, and you're going to do it anyway?" I would have said: "absolutely not, strange mind-reader!" But like... I'm here! Finally! And it's... real now? Like, this isn't just a bunch of clips of scenes in my head anymore! That's rad!

That being said, it's definitely been slower than Book 4, because I kept switching back to my outline document to make sure that certain things were set up properly, and that I hadn't lost any of the plot threads or forgotten a minor beat that was vitally important for the story three chapters later. And I had a minor crisis about three months ago when I ripped out about 8 chapters in the first third of the book — basically everything from September to December — because I'd done a readthrough to check pacing (big mistake! never edit while drafting, that's satan talking) and realized I had a missing storyline. Like, there was a whole layer of the story that was just. Missing. Not there. And the existing text really couldn't fit another thread, so instead of taking weeks to pore through and try to sift out what I could save, I needed to factory reset and start over. And I didn't want to! I vividly remember sitting there with my head in my hands, trying not to weep, because I'd decimated 90,000 words of work in a single edit. But it had to be done. Because the story wasn't going to work. And now (hopefully) it will.

And of course, there's still that sense of excitement and exhilaration from before. Always. But whereas Book 4 felt like a delicious chocolate pudding, Book 5 is a medium-rare steak.

(Book 6, so far, is four shots of espresso and a whiskey chaser. FWIW.)

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 49 Burnt Cereal with Milk Posting

Alright, dear void. It's time. I put on my powerscaler hat and turned on the stove.

Never ever let me cook again though- apparently I'm just as shitty at it online as I am IRL. We are going to Eye Scars at the temple next. Well, "we" meaning Hakuri, Uruha, and some fodder since the train fight DIDN'T HAPPEN. Yet. Is it too delusional to think that we could get the super cool stuff with Uruha fighting off the mooks somehow? Because damn, I was really looking forward to more than what we got...

It's alright though. I can cope with the power of even stronger delusions.

Wasn't there LITERALLY any better way to do this than pulling on Uruha's hair, Hakuri?!

Still enjoying the fact that Chihiro can yell out a random word and Hakuri will instantly understand his full intent. They don't have to plan shit- they just figure it out and it works.

Yeah, they both would know that "Centipede" is referring to Kyora's usage of Magatsumi's ability, but Chihiro improvising the move on the spot and Hakuri adjusting perfectly is awesome. Sad they're separated for now, but hopefully we get more of this stuff through the whole series. They're so busted when they work together because soulmate coding.

But this new Kuro technique is probably why John keeps pressing the assault and forcing Chihiro to act: he adapts and improves at an incredible rate when he's under pressure. Still don't know why John needs him to be extremely powerful and full of hatred for his plans, but maybe Hiruhiko will spill the beans. He's a chatty bastard who gets his jollies from extreme methods after all.

Fuck these guys.

Hiruhiko is the king of "it's just a prank bro, don't get so upset brooooooooooo" assholes everywhere. His origami powers are pretty neat though, I gotta admit. The editor's note for this week was something along the lines of "Uruha's will is also carried on [Chihiro's] blade"... I want that pretty face to get bloodied and beaten, man. I actually detest flippant long-haired guys as an entire character archetype so please let him have an agonizing death. I want to look forward to it no matter how long it takes.

Speaking of the Hishaku, do they have the world's freakiest training camp for new members or something? Ch. 32

Ch. 49

Literal bloodbath of a series.

This is the second time Chihiro's been blinded with blood in a fight. It's a cool and intelligent tactic but like, why? Use the wrong person's blood and Chihiro will die to some horrible infection or disease before those seeds of hatred can mature, my dudes. But I kinda wonder... Chs. 32 & 49 again:

Hiruhiko proceeds to taunt Chihiro like nothing happened after being violently stabbed out of a moving train.

There's something freaky about how the marked Hishaku members are totally OK with being skewered and losing limbs. Even Chihiro winces in pain when he's hit hard enough to lose his arm, y'know? Is it just because this is an ultra-violent action series and the villains need to stay threatening?

No insights, just pure glazing. This panel absolutely stunning... I can clearly see the motion and imagine exactly how it's happening. I held my breath in anticipation while reading this and was not at all disappointed by the gorgeous spread on the next page. God I love the fights in Kagurabachi.

Yet another "Hakuri needs time to recover" reminder. It's been constant since the arc started in Chapter 45... just for the dramatic tension, probably. I've already said my piece about relying on this particular tool too much, so let's move on.

As this site's #1 Hakuri Agendaposter, I think he's gonna be okay in the short term. We don't know if the Hishaku have accounted for him or not, but the focus right now is on the Bearers. He'll be fine. Surely. I can see him going too far to be "useful" and knocking himself out to transport Kumeyuri and possibly Eye Scar's blade- or maybe Hiyuki to their current location if Hokazono-sensei's feeling funny-, but no torture or suffering flags have been raised. Yet. He's just going to be running on fumes for a while...

Official Tier List Drop

Chihiro corrected Hakuri's "nonsense" estimations for all the powerscalers out there, how kind of him. I kind of went on a fuckhuge tangent here but I can't be assed to retake all the screenshots to post separately. So suffer (or skip if you're sane)!

But who could beat Goku?!?!?!/1/1 Obviously, equipped nuke bearers and Hiyuki are in a class of their own. A step down are uniquely strong fighters like Azami, Shiba, Hiruhiko, and John. Then there's the endless Datenseki fodder who are only scary when they're in a group and not exploded yet.

I don't give a flying fuck about who would win against Ultra SSJ Gigaturbo Pepsimaxx'd Goku. However, I do like it when there are clearly established tiers of power. NOT the graded tiers style where things are neatly ranked from coughing baby to hydrogen bomb, mind you. That is the laziest way to explain a universe's relative power dynamic. It also lets me know that the protagonist is going to single-handedly wreck the balance via powercreep not even halfway through the series (unless it's HxH, which only applies to one series: HxH).

I much prefer Kagurabachi's fuzzy approach. The stakes are clearly established: the Enchanted Blades and Hiyuki's Enkotsu are a Big Fucking Deal. They are incredibly strong and all the characters treat them as such. So Chihiro, Hiyuki, and armed Bearers are at the top.

Yet even within that small selection there's a notable differential in power between those who have mastered the weapon and those who haven't. Chihiro is hella strong, but Shiba let us know early on that he's still got a long way to go before he's truly formidable. We've seen Chihiro get bodied by Sojo, a genius who only had Kuregumo for a few weeks; he's in tune with Enten, but he's got a hell of a lot to learn about fighting strong opponents still. He's probably closer in strength to an Elite Sorcerer than a veteran Bearer like Uruha. (The whole thing about hardly ever fighting fully healed and rested up is also a sticking point, but not gonna digress on that.)

Beneath that tier are strong Elite sorcerers. Azami was noted by Uruha as being as "reassuring" as Hiyuki in terms of his abilities, and Chihiro put Shiba, John, and Hiruhiko on par with him. So I think it's reasonable to infer that the strength of their sorcery and their experience as fighters would put them so close to the Bearers in terms of power. The elite Kamunabi guards and task force, by comparison, make up for their shortcomings by working together as a team. They'd be at the bottom of this category -possibly another step below- individually, but their teamwork and experience put them much closer to a Bearer's strength. The Sazanami Tou would be in this category too despite mostly being off-screened by Shiba (he's just that good).

And then there are run-of-the-mill guys like the Trauma, Mud Clone, and regular Sazanami sorcerers. They're very strong compared to an average person but need those Datenseki shards to compete with the elites. This is the true "miminum strength" floor in Kaugrabachi. If you can't hold your own against a rando sorcerer hireling, you have no business being involved in the fights. Of course the Hiruhikos and Shibas of the world will outclass you horribly, but that's the risk you take when being unnamed fodder in Kagurabachi.

This high of a power floor is why I'm glad we don't see regular people like Hinao anywhere near the skirmishes- a sorcerer can easily manhandle them, and the fights Chihiro gets involved in are far more lethal than they can safely stand around to provide commentary for. This means all the insightful remarks come from the fighters themselves and only rarely an omniscient narrator, which is so much more interesting than listening to a non-combatant give a play-by-play. It's refreshing to see the fighting left to the warriors while the regular folks actually run away to safety for once, you know?

That's a key component of why the fights in Kagurabachi feel so different from other shounen so far. I don't need someone who's never thrown hands telling me how amazing Chihiro looks and explaining what he's doing: the author is showing me while Chihiro himself tells me what he's thinking. And when we do get third-party commentary, it's limited to providing vital context. We aren't wasting panels to glaze the fighters and explain everything in excruciating detail. We just see it play out and understand that yes, this is absolutely awesome and it works because of the quality of the composition. And because we don't need a door stopper of a novel to explain what each ability does (this is JJK shade, come at me).

OK, tangent within a tangent aside... where does that leave outliers like Hakuri, Tafuku, Ice Lady, and unarmed bearers?

Tafuku's sorcery has insane utility, but it looks like he himself doesn't get any direct combat boost. So he really needs a partner like Hiyuki to make the most of it.

I'd say he's probably in the Elite tier considering he has no issues dealing with the rank-and-file sorcerers and guards at the auction. He's plenty used to defending himself while Hiyuki wreaks havoc at least. So the combination of skill, utility, and experience make up for the lack of raw power.

So far it seems as though folks like Char and Ice Lady aren't much better off than non-sorcerers. In fact, we've only seen these traits cause a great deal of suffering at the hands of people who want to exploit them...

Their natural traits seem to provide passive benefits that can negate sorcery side-effects in specific situations (like the nausea caused by Shiba's teleportation in Char's case), but so far there's no evidence that they provide any advantages against actual techniques. They're below the minimum power threshold but a smidge above average civilians for now. This could change if we get more information and examples, though.

So Chihiro said, but...

Dude's still looking mighty fine to me.

If all the former bearers are on the same level as Uruha, then they're not truly "defenseless". However, they definitely do need help when facing Elites and many average sorcerers. They're probably in the middle of the "ordinary" sorcerer tier without their blades- competent against the minimum, but at risk against anything tougher.

So yeah. Uruha's not gonna get shanked by a regular non-magical enemy- he's just defenseless compared to most of the relevant combatants in this universe right now. And as soon as he gets Kumeyuri back, he'll be at the apex. He should be able to handle the trash still on the train just fine until then.

Potential Man incarnate

Hakuri's in a weird spot.

He's the first genius in his clan's 200-year history since the OG patriarch and has a huge amount of potential. Even in the wider world he's quite exceptional for having two sorcery abilities available to him. But the actual mechanics of how he allocates his sorcery and trains it are big unknowns right now. Hakuri's basically got infinite potential, maybe enough to put him in the same tier as the Bearers and Hiyuki. But will he have the time and narrative attention to get there? We don't know. He can't even use his powers without knocking himself out at the moment, so it'll be a while before we see any movement on that too.

He's off to the side with a big question mark over his head for now. I need more information and screen time of him fighting while rested to place him. Which reminds me, actually... Kazane's in the same position. He was supposed to be the trump card in the Sojo fight but lost his arm and most of his comrades before he got to do anything. So he and Hakuri can chill on the sidelines until it's time to see them in action once more.

Thanks for tuning in to the worst cooking show on Tumblr, dear void. Next up: Eye Scars, maybe! Chihiro fighting through the streets to get vengeance on Uruha's behalf! Uruha and Hakuri possibly also making an appearance! Stay fresh, bachibros.

[mysteriouslybluepirate]

So overall I don't like the OFMD Reddit. I've tried to create a post about why narratively I felt S2 didn't work ignoring the Izzy stuff, one only about the Izzy stuff(since there are very few Izzy-focused fans on there), then another talking about Olu/Jim/(Archie/Zheng) talking about why I was disappointed in it. If it's a negative post, moderators won't approve the post to go live. Which I don't love. But okay, if you want a positive echo chamber to offset Tumblr and Twitter about this season, sure.

I still check it out of curiosity when I stumble across this GEM.

We've had quite a bit of time to debate this. Almost two years, and this was posted 11/15/23. Yes, the OP was very kind (I agree that Ed thought that Stede was cool cause he beat Izzy, and was a new pirate on the scene. Then once he realizes how dumb the crew is the plan springs up into place), and I'm not hating on them specifically. Just that some social media places are just still at this point.

I blame a large section of the fanbase for not EVER reading any Izzy POV meta. Who are now scrambling to go back to rewatch S1 knowing what we know about Izzy now.

If you want to see all the responses, ranging from those I agree with to those that are just wild, let me know, I might put the link in the comments my favorites range from. 'Blackbeard wanted to but Ed didn't' to the usual Izzy is a superhuman being. To 'ALL THIS WAS JUST TO KEEP IZZY ON THE SHIP'?

Do they not see how INTERESTING the dynamic between Ed and Izzy is? That their relationship is giving and pulling at just the right times? Izzy trying to maintain their shield and Ed desperately trying to find a life where he doesn't hate himself? Both of them DON'T REALLY WANT THIS-Ed being openly suicidal to Izzy keeping his head down and working- living day by day- each NOT talking about their issues.

That hiding behind the Blackbeard name is the only way they'll survive? That killing Stede Bonnet could genuinely give Ed the out he craves. Izzy could then Captain a ship full of a crew that (theoretically) already fears and respects him?

[Not that Izzy would be good at it, or even want to be away from Ed, but you get my point. This was a *change in their lives* that is VERY tempting to two men who have been in survival mode for YEARS-

Also, it's very obvious Jenkins didn't plan Izzy's character out, so Izzy wanting to captain to me can just be written off as Jenkins not knowing the character yet, since he NEVER PAYS THE SCENE -WHERE IZZY IS FLATTERED AT POTENTIALLY BEING GIVEN TITLE CAPTIN-OFF (cough cough Izzy could have been the captain/first mate S2ep8)...moving on]

If Lucius didn't stumble in, Ed would have killed Stede here. He was aiming for a fatal spot in his neck and actively swinging down, I couldn't find a gif and had to take a photo on my phone, but you get my point.

Ed then realizes that not only was he willing to kill a guy who, overall, had been very kind to him, but then gets the Kraken as a reminder that he HAS killed. That he's spent his entire life killing to put himself into a better spot. Slowly rising up the ranks, and it's never been enough to keep him happy. Be it his dad, or fuck, even killing this rich dude and stealing his identity.

~BUT NO~

Izzy is SO EVIL guys, Ed doesn't want to kill Stede! He just has to pretend to be violent in front of Izzy so Izzy doesn't mutiny or leave him!! Doesn't that TOTALLY make sense? Ed's struggling since he never wanted to kill Stede, and he's struggling with the 'order' Izzy gave him!!

[Ignoring how Ed wanted to help him retire in the first place, how Izzy nudges Ed to follow the fisherman thing, and how Ed wanted Izzy to *stay* in the first place.]

The reddit is FILLED with takes like this, btw. Sorry if it seems like straw-manning, but I can find the posts if you need them.

[montammil]

June of Doom Day 6 - "They don't care about you."

| Flinch | Broken Promise | Abandoned |

Characters: Rowan, Sawyer

A little AU if this was the way Rowan kidnapped Sawyer. Also shorter than my usual stuff, been in a creative rut for the millionth time lol.

CW: Intimate/yandere whumper, kidnapping, consensual sex (no descriptive nsfw), drugging, implied stalking

...

Sawyer was never too interested in dating, he had no need to when his life was finally starting to go good. He had friends he actually trusted, got a new apartment that wasn't completely falling apart, and was getting steady income. That was all he needed.

And then Rowan happened.

Rowan was always hanging around the club, watching him with hooded eyes that never dared turn away from him. He would leave huge tips, and tried his hardest to get Sawyer's attention.

For a while, Sawyer managed to ignore him and write him off as one of the usual creeps who saw him as an object to get them off more than a person with feelings.

Yet Sawyer was feeling extra depressed one night, and if he got any more drunk than he already was, he'd just embarrass himself.

He was sitting alone when Sawyer walked over, even if it was more of a stumble than anything. "Hi." His voice was surprisingly clear, though it wavered on the edge of drunkenness. "This seat taken?" He pointed to his lap suggestively.

Rowan sputtered out his drink. It was a little cute, Sawyer had to admit. The same guy who was acting like a total creep was also a blushing mess when his advances were returned.

It gave him an odd sense of control. It was hard to feel scared of a guy whose hands shook whenever he was close to him. Sawyer figured he had little to no sexual experience, given the way he couldn't hold himself together like most people could.

"N-No, of course not. I'd love it if you joined me." He shifted so Sawyer could sit.

Sawyer took him up on his offer. He wrapped his arm around his shoulder, giving him a seductive look. "Rowan, right? You've been coming in a lot. Always watching me. Do you just like watching me or do you think you have a chance with me?"

Rowan practically had hearts in his eyes. "Can't it be both?"

That made him laugh. "Sure. Well, Mr. Rowan, wanna get out of here and continue this in private?" He gestured to the back exit with his thumb. "Free of charge." Rowan jumped up and dragged him out of the club, much to Sawyer's amusement.

...

When Sawyer woke up the next morning, Rowan was already awake. He was on his side, and Rowan was tracing his collarbone with his fingers.

He barely remembered anything, but judging by how almost half of his body was littered with hickeys, he knew they fucked.

Sawyer stretched and sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Mornin'."

"Morning, my love. Sorry for all of these." He kissed a bite mark on Sawyer's shoulder for emphasis. "I promise I'm not usually that rough, you just have that effect on me." He ran his fingers through Sawyer's hair. "Want me to make breakfast? I make pretty good pancakes."

"Actually..." Sawyer reached over to grab his clothes off the ground. "I should probably get going."

Rowan blinked in shock, then sat up as well. "Really? Oh, well I can drive you home if you'd like. Whenever you're free, we could--"

"Look, this was really nice and all, but this was a one-time thing." He pulled his slacks up his thighs, wincing at how sore he felt. He was still recovering from last night, that was for sure. "You're a great guy and all, but I don't do relationships."

He slipped his t-shirt over his head. Sawyer resisted the urge to look at Rowan. He could feel his eyes burning the back of his head.

"Why not?" It was a simple question, yet it felt so invasive.

Sawyer stood up, getting his shoes. "Because it's just a waste of time. I've had my share of boyfriends, and they always ended in disaster." He adjusted the cuffs of his sleeves. "Relationships are just drama and heartbreak, I'd rather just enjoy what life gives me, without any added problems."

"And I'm a problem to you?"

He wouldn't let himself get manipulated. "No, because we aren't dating."

Rowan didn't respond for a while. Sawyer got up to leave, only to feel a hand wrap around his wrist. He flinched back, but it did nothing to deter him.

"You make me feel alive." He kissed his knuckles, a strange action that came out of nowhere. "I don't see you as just another sex object like all those bastards do. They don't care about you. But I do." He slowly moved his kisses up Sawyer's arm. "I can prove it. Just give me a chance."

Sawyer shifted on his feet uncomfortably. "I'm flattered, but I'm just not mentally ready for another relationship yet." It felt like a cheap excuse, but it was the truth. He was afraid to open his heart to someone else again. "I'm sorry."

"When will you be ready?" Rowan asked. His tone was flat.

"I... I don't know."

Rowan's grip tightened for just a moment longer before letting go. "Okay." He sounded disappointed, but stepped back to give him space.

Sawyer offered a wave and smile. He made long strides to the door, wanting to escape his regretted actions as soon as possible.

As he twisted the knob, an arm wrapped around his stomach and pulled him against Rowan's chest.

Sawyer opened his mouth to scream, when a rag was forced over his nose and mouth. He immediately held his breath, but the substance was already seeping into his lungs.

His knees buckled and Rowan lowered him to the ground, holding him protectively. Sawyer was terrified, his vision was already fading at the corners, his consciousness being sucked away with each passing second.

"Shh, it's okay," Rowan hushed, stroking his hair. He stared down at him with a sickening adoration. "I love you so much."

The last thing Sawyer saw was Rowan leaning down to kiss him, and then was overcome with darkness.

[pathologicalrunaway]

speaking of my au: here's a little something (characters + weird incorrect quote-styled dialogues)

__

eeny:

moth hair

young and innocent. silly lil bean. likes learning new stuff (there's a lot)

meeny:

two braids

shy, a bit introverted. can read and is good at understanding how others feel

miny:

two short ponytails

proactive and energetic, always ready to help. a bit unattantive

moe:

mohawk

somewhat tactless. curious. a bit reckless and impatient at times

resh:

looks like a normal person (not corrupted). moth-like hair but longer and a moth-style outfit (you can die with style but you can't be reborn with it). capeless, which makes them rely on the moths a lot

doesn't know what they'd like to be called. miny recognised them as 'mx king' and they never tried to correct them. until a certain point

tired, grumpy, sarcastic and easily annoyed. despises themself and snaps at others. totally lost: doesn't know what they want, who they are and what they should do. suicidal and confrontational and tries to appear rude and dangerous in order for their pain to go unnoticed (failing miserably)

_____

eeny: i'm sure it'll be fun!

resh:

resh: i wanna die

resh: *is having a moment, contemplating isle, deserted and empty*

eeny: what's going on with them?

moe: they're experiencing shrimp emotions

resh: *falls from a manta and hits the ground*

miny: anything broken?

resh: my dignity

resh: leave! me! alone!

resh: *slips on the ground, falls in the brook, gets extinguished immediately*

moe:

moe: sure, call when you need us

miny: hey guys, it's grandma hour!

eeny, meeny and moe: yeeey!

resh: what are you talking about??

*10 minutes later*

miny: so, this is grandma hour!

resh, who hasn't been in such a cozy home-like environment in centuries and can barely hold back tears: cool

meeny: sometimes i wonder what it'd be like to have a parent. someone who cares about you, someone who waits for you to come home, someone who supports you no matter what and protects you from dangers. someone you can trust and who'd never leave you. i wonder what it feels like, to be loved like that.

resh: *sighs* it feels nice

eeny, meeny, miny and moe: *trying to process the implications of what they've just heard*

eeny: be careful with the krills

resh: pardon me?

miny: that's what we call dark dragons. we've figured out that if you give funny names to scary things, they seem less scary.

eeny: you can try if you want!

resh:

resh: the Trial of Walls

moe: they said funny, not stupid

moe: also who tf is afraid of the trial of earth

meeny: don't go there, moe! there must be a safer way!

moe: oh, don't make such a fuss! i'll be alright

resh: yeah, let them go. if they get eaten, it's their fault

moe: *gets noticed by a krill*

resh: MOE *runs to help*

resh: *is having a panic attack*

eeny: mx king?..

resh: don't call me that! i'm not a king, not after all i've done!

eeny: how should we call you then?

meeny: maybe mx prince? they've mentioned being a prince before

miny: maybe mx ruler? it's more general...

moe: maybe cake mix?

resh, suddenly stopping crying: w h a t

resh: you're annoying. stop trying to help everyone all the time

miny: is this your way of saying "thanks for saving my ass four times this morning"?

resh:

resh: no

resh: why's that kid sitting in front of a door all alone? not that i care

moe: why're you asking then? not that i care

miny, already standing at the door with the kid: ARE YOU GOING TO HELP OR NOT?

miny: who do you love most?

resh: no one. i hate all of you equally.

eeny: awwww they can't pick a favourite 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺❤❤❤❤❤✨✨✨✨✨✨

*the moths and resh finally meet the elders*

the elders:

resh:

sah: ...the fuck??

resh, covering meeny's ears: don't swear in front of the kids!!!

+ bonus:

resh: i've only had eeny, meeny, miny and moe for a day and a half but if anything happened to them, i would kill everyone in this kingdom and then myself

eeny: huh?

resh: i said i hate your guts and wanna kill you

[infiniteglitterfall]

I'm so fucking done right now

I have a friend. We're going to call her "AAAAAAA!!!!"

AAAAAAA!!!! and I have been friends for more than twenty years. LONG before I started converting to Judaism.

She grew up in an area Jewish enough to get the high holy days off. She has as many Jewish friends as I do. She is more knowledgeable about Jewish stuff than anyone else I know who isn't Jewish. To the point that I've sometimes thought about asking her why she doesn't convert.

Sure, she's a staunch atheist. So nu?

I don't think we'd ever had occasion to talk about I/P politics before a couple of years ago. We immediately discovered we had uhhhhh. Very opposing views. We both backed off of what was clearly going to be a charged and messy discussion.

I didn't know enough yet to try anyway. All I knew, mainly, was that (1) Jews are the indigenous people of Israel and (2) both Israel and Palestine have Done Bad Shit!

That's a very, very, very inadequate understanding. But I did feel pretty confident that point #1 contradicted her apparent stance, which was more "Israel is the one that has Done Bad Shit."

We backed off for a couple of years. She would occasionally mention how much she wished I would read Edward Said, so we could talk about him.

She is, to her credit, totally against Hamas's attack. But we conflict on most other issues. And they're so charged for her that we can't really talk about any of them.

It turns out that the reason they're so charged is that her niece got yelled at and called out for "being an antisemite" for supporting BDS in college, and it was traumatizing for her.

In other words, she and her family stopped at "I had really really big feelings of shame and fear about this," and chose not to see "and I tried to find out why this marginalized group was saying that" as an option.

And also, AAAAAAA!!!!'s sister, a local elementary school principal, went through a stressful time recently for similar reasons: Jewish families were accusing her and/or her school of being antisemitic, and one (1) family left.

AAAAAAAA!!!! set the boundary, with me, that we should not talk about the definition of antisemitism, or antisemitism related to the protest movement, after I posted a list of things on Facebook that the ADL is charging the Berkeley Unified School District with.

Including that K-12 students have been saying and/or writing, "Kill the Jews," "Jews are stupid," "Of course it was the Jews," and telling Jewish peers, "I don't like your people."

My friend is angrily convinced that "such accusations are a flood of SEWAGE smeared on protesters, professors, etc. I am not saying there is no antisemitism, though Berkeley is a very weird place for it to crop up in the from-zero-to-a-thousand way it is described. Of course there can be a) isolated incidents that hit fucking hard in these circumstances, and b) deliberate elisions between, again, being against what Israel is doing, and having that portrayed as being antisemitic."

/looks at the camera/

All of this is just context for what I came here to say 😅

I WAS TONIGHT YEARS OLD WHEN I FOUND OUT WHAT EDWARD SAID WROTE, AND WHAT THE ENTIRE FUCK. FUCK THAT DUDE TWICE.

Constantine Zurayk's fiction that the “Arab nation” suffered the Nakba didn’t survive for long. [By 1967,] the meaning of the Nakba had already changed as Palestinian activists and historians began depicting the events of 1948 exclusively as a tragedy for their own people.

...The most influential of those [new books that framed it that way,] particularly for audiences in the West, was Edward W. Said’s The Question of Palestine, published in 1979.

Said, a popular Columbia University English professor [OH HELLO] and a member of the Palestinian National Council, was something of an icon in liberal intellectual circles because of his earlier book, Orientalism. In that work, Said framed the history of colonialism in the Arab and Islamic world within a system of Western racialist thought.

I'm just gonna guess that he didn't go back farther than 50 years. Because before that point, you get 1,300 years or so of Arab and Islamic colonialism, and I don't know how it would make sense to frame that within a system of Western racialist thought.

In The Question of Palestine, the author argued that the game was stacked against the native Palestinians in favor of the white Zionists, because of the same dominant racist ideologies.

THAT'S HIM, OFFICER. THAT'S THE GUY.

That's what my friend has been trying to get me to read for three years? An ahistoric mess that pretends Jews were actually white supremacists at the time that white supremacy was actively trying to wipe us out?

I'M SO TIRED, YOU GUYS.

Said denounced “the entrenched cultural attitude toward Palestinians deriving from age-old Western prejudices about Islam, the Arabs, and the Orient. This attitude, from which in its turn Zionism drew for its view of the Palestinians, dehumanized us, reduced us to the barely tolerated status of a nuisance.”

Yeah, THAT'S what happened.

“Certainly, so far as the West is concerned,” Said continues, “Palestine has been a place where a relatively advanced (because European) incoming population of Jews has performed miracles of construction and civilizing and has fought brilliantly successful technical wars against what was always portrayed as a dumb, essentially repellent population of uncivilized Arab natives.”

This was a harsh and distorted view of the Zionist movement.

I said I was so fucking done, and what I MEANT was that I was so fucking angry, and NOW I'M TEXTING HER SUPPORTIVELY ABOUT OTHER STUFF WHILE I WRITE THIS.

I just.

Please drag Edward Said for me or otherwise Go Off. Thank you

[savrenim]

I visited your tumble to try and find the (hopefully still) spoilery post you warn about in ANs for the unfinihed fic, We Raise It Up, because I fell in love with the story and I would love to see more and your plans for it (even if you did write farther past your original plans reached, I'm sure it would still be fascinating or fun to read)

Except I got lost in the Scum Villain posts (my fav!!!!!) And all your reblogs, and I completely forgot what I came here for and it's been over an hour and I only just remembered that I was looking for more with your TMA Time Travel Fix-it fic (it feels very hope-punk to me and I love it!!)

Tumblr is playing very mean with my phone (as always) and the search is. Not working great. ...I actually clicked on the "Send Ask" option about 10 minutes before this window popped up, and I've been searching between now and then, so- tumblr, what are you doing???

...anyways, just in your inbox to say I love your fics and your taste in reblogs! And that hopefully I'll find more stuff about your story, soon! Keep being awesome!!

aaaah thank you so much!!

I am like 99% sure that the post you are looking for is this one , which was the post that I originally made of "I WANT TO WRITE A TMA FIC THIS IS APPROXIMATELY WHAT IT WOULD BE" that then outlined The Whole Idea Beginning To End. so it does cover more than what is published in the fic.

it is........ very interesting to look back on because there are, like.... maybe one-to-three major spoilers still in there but scattered amongst twenty red herrings that have totally changed as my plans for the fic changed / I actually filled out my outline and adjusted bits and pieces or realized that [x] would work better than [y] etc etc etc so like. if you decide to look at it you will probably be able to tell comparing it to The Actual Fic that some serious things have changed already but that just like. fully applies through the end. so it remains a read at your own risk! there is the original conception of the ending in there, that the actual ending has been refined from.

gods I've got about half the remaining stuff actually written it's on my list to sit down and write the rest of it because goddamnit I want my writing to exist in the world not just on my computer but that will happen when it happens

in good news I'm pretty sure tonight is the last of my edits to my newest fic a svsss fic never told you what I do for a living that, to give a quick preview/ the current planned summary is

【 The System was successfully activated! Bound Role: Wu Yanzi, Demonic Cultivator and Master of— 】 {} Not his body. He remembered dying. An undeniable System, before it had bugged out. Okay. Okay, he could handle this. Transmigration. Demonic cultivator. Named… Fuck, he hadn't actually caught what he was supposed to be named. …..There was only one piece of media he was familiar with that was about demonic cultivators.

expected post time tomorrow evening???? very excited about that

[rogueshadeaux]

Slllliiiiiides over here. Hi hello. I don't think I'll do a bad karma run (IM SORRY. IM SORRY!!) cause a) I'm a wimp and b) I need to get off videogames as soon as I'm done cause I've spent too much time playing lately lmao BUT I will be watching playthrougs cause I gotta know how fucked up he gets.... I gotta know...

To clarify i have a pre existing oc from a story that could be very easily flung into a vat of "au juice" because she's already halfway there in her own cannon LMAO we shall see, for now I have a huge list of things I want to draw for this game so I gotta finish 2 before I explode then I can unleash myself on art again. Gotta feed the discord now. I'm cooking for a crowd.

hi i've been dead for 8 days and recuperating for two lol I understand life stuff (and saw some references to it on your timeline, like the warhammer stuff and the tarot card thing??? bro that shit looks so good!!) as someone that literally shared your stuff and then got ripped away for my own life happenings lmfao. But if you get the chance in the future? Seriously, try an evil karma inF2 run. There's something about how they balanced the story that puts its predecessor AND sequel to shame. They're the same story, but different tales. They have the same goal, but different goalposts. SPP gives you a well-thought-out storyline that both is cohesive, but feels like your choices actually matter. It has none of the "I can help this old lady...or kick her fucking dog lol" of inFAMOUS 1, or the "I will fight for the tribe but literally do everything wrong. everywhere. because I'm a Bad Boy™" of inFAMOUS: Second Son. The choices feel real. They feel sound. They feel like the choices a man wronged by the world would make, if he decided to turn to his harbored resentment instead of his morality. And let's be honest, Cole also feels more morally gray in inF2 than 1 anyways, so seeing the path he takes is great because it genuinely feels like he's done with the accumulation of every shitty situation that has happened to him. And I'm sure you know how the story ends now, so...don't you wanna see what happens if he chose the other option? (pls tell me you haven't watched the playthrough yet lmfao)

Anyways yeah no I totally get life shit, it loves to pull you away from stuff, and also as someone only just now trying to do the bad options in Detroit: Become Human despite getting the game at launch because I need 6 years of preparation to be the bad guy, I understand the wimp bit too. It's hard to be mean sometimes. But with Cole's inF2 story, it doesn't feel mean. It feels like a desperate man, trying to fight for a future he's not convinced cares about him.

And yes oh my god please keep creating lmfao we all love your art so goddamn much. Don't leave this fandom you're now a very important asset. And it's always a good thing, throwing old friends into new situations! I love an OC in a wardrobe change. That's usually the best translation. Think a bit harder about forcing that OC into a new role. Shove her ass onto the stage. We'd all love her.

[haretic]

god im in. the worst spot of my life.

so, i've had this bestfriend for two years, theyre one of my closest friends, i'll call them G. at the start of the school year i made friends with a guy in my socials class (to be mentioned as T) and he introduced me to his friendgroup and a guy i went to primary school with (N). Two months ago, G told me they had a crush on T. This was no issue, it was cute and fine and fun, but T doesn't reciprocate. About a week ago, G told T and he told G about how he has a crush on me. Since then, G has been acting really mean to me, for what i thought was no reason because i didn't know T liked me until literally yesterday, but now it all makes sense. My friend N knew about all of this, and showed me a bunch of stuff about how G was trying to talk shit about me and how he had to keep shutting it down as G got more rude about me, asking him if I was manipulating him into staying sober at his new years party tomorrow because I can't drink. He said no, and that he had offered himself and I hadn't even mentioned a thing about it. I was planning on not going until he offered because he remembered i couldn't drink, and I was fine with not going as I didn't want to be the only sober person there, and didn't want to ruin the mood for anyone else or make them feel bad for drinking. I asked a dozen times if he was sure, and said I was really fine with sitting this one out as we could do something another day to celebrate and he insisted and insisted he wanted to, that he already was planning on not drinking as he wanted to make sure nothing got too out of hand (the party is at his house), but my friend kept insisting i was manipulating him or forcing him or something similar. Now, today, N broke up with his abusive boyfriend. Or rather, I broke up with him for him, as I've been abused and knew how to handle it. I was at his house all day, helping and hanging out with him and stuff. He was happy, told me he was happy, that he felt free, and that he had wanted to for so long but had no clue where to start. Once I got home, T, N and I all started playing games online together. At about 1am, N got really quiet, and i assumed he was just tired. He turned off his mic and his camera and about half an hour later, on call, I hear from T he tried to kill himself. Now, I'm helping deal with this situation (hes fine, no damage dealt, no hospital needed, i ensured.) Tomorrow though, I'm going to the party and T still likes me, G is still being so, so mean and hurtful and N is worried that his ex will show up and wreck the whole thing. And i just don't know what to do. I feel totally responsible for N. We were together literally all day, and I didn't notice a thing. So I relapsed, and I relapsed bad, and now I'm worried they'll all see it and N will feel responsible and T will want to help which will make G mad and I just don't want to deal with all of this. On top of all that, I'm T's first crush. If we dated I would be his first everything. Its been putting so much pressure on me, and I know if I dated him I would lose G, and I don't want that, but he treats me so respectfully and carefully, and he genuinely cares about me, but I'm just so scared that I'm too fucked up to date, and i don't even know if I'm into him like that. Its just all crumbling around me and I can feel everything turning to dust in my fingers. I feel totally disconnected from all the emotions towards it, though i know the feelings are there at the back of my mind just waiting to come out. I just want to disappear for a bit but fuck, I can't do that, and I don't know what else to do. I want to sleep but I just can't.

[priafey]

AO3 Twenty Questions

tagged by @ladytanithia. a big thank you, as always!

tagging @inkoherentwriting, @azures-grace and YOU, dear reader

(copy/paste for the questions below the cut)

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

Four, not counting the work I published as a reference list for my OCs.

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

84,627

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Just TES:Skyrim for the moment. Sadly, I haven't been able to play any of the other games just yet.

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

I'm dying for Among the Many Lost Souls to surpass Sought and Found. It was my first venture into longform writing and it shows. Bleh.

5 – Do you respond to comments?

Almost always. If I don't respond, it's usually because I tried my darndest and couldn't think of a constructive or meaningful response.

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The one I'm writing right now :3c (Among the Many Lost Souls). I'm putting Gwilin through the wringer and then I'm gonna hang him out to dry.

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sought and Found, I suppose.

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

No, I don't. I lowkey wish I did. Firstly, because haters can be remarkably perceptive, and, secondly, because I am as interested in what makes someone scrunch up their nose or click away from my fic as I am about hearing people's thoughts on what was well-executed about them. I think my stuff is too niche to really draw a lot of negative attention (right now, at least).

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Always, my man! I consider it my moral duty to make my characters fuck nasty. Why? BECAUSE IT'S HOT DUHHH

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

People who write crossovers scare me so bad. I can barely limp my way through having to structure a plot around already-existing lore and making sure everything that happens in the story is congruent with in-universe rules, meanwhile there are people out there writing Skyrim x The Walking Dead crossovers. It's cocobananas.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know. I don't really give a fuck if people steal my shit. Fighting with someone over authorship of a work that is principally riding on the coattails of an existing IP, which can't even be monetized, mind you, feels like a real 'race to the bottom' situation to me. I'm well aware of the quality of my work and I'm proud to have the drive to constantly better my skills. That's all that matters.

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. Though I did start translating Sought and Found into Spanish, I dropped it when I started writing Among the Many Lost Souls. In any case, I would be so, so touched if someone decided to translate a fic of mine.

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

Also nope. Never tried collaborative writing outside of an academic setting. Totally open to it, though!

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

Uh, I'm not real big on shipping existing characters. I mostly just think about my OCs, or my friend's OCs, with each other. Aside from Gwilin x [pretty much every other NPC in Skyrim], I think thoughts about @abstractredd's guys, Hedgrod and Athrar, quite often.

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Fic-related WIP? Just one. I wanted to write another romance fic (like Sought and Found) featuring a netch farmer who's a cowboy-type character. Sexy Dunmer with a southwestern accent. Brokeback Mountain: Morrowind Edition. You get the picture.

I might still finish it, but I'm reluctant to even touch it because I haven't played Morrowind, and would have to do a real deep-dive into everything related to Dunmer in TES lore to write it. I know a lot already, but I never feel like I know enough, y'know?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

I've been told I'm good at setting a scene and painting a picture. This is, I think, a new ability I acquired in the past year or so. I've also been told my smut-writing abilities are pretty good, which is always nice to hear :) If I had to list what I consider to be my own strengths, I'd add that I've gotten a lot better at cutting the fat out of my writing (especially from dialogue tags and in describing facial expressions and body language).

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue is a bitch a half for me to write. It's probably the thing I most obsessively tweak before publishing. I think my dialogue tends to fall short.

Pacing is another issue. I often criticize, in other fic author's works, that they present an interesting image or idea and then leave me hungry because they don't elaborate on it, but I am the biggest culprit of this if I don't constantly remind myself that, yes, people want to hear more about this or that. They want you to mystify it, justify it, make it sexy, make it like a puzzle for them to solve. You can't just leave it cut-and-dry, much as my autism compels to do because "It's quite literally saying the same thing". Like, that's great, bestie, but you have to elaborate! Say the same thing just make it sound cooler than it is!

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

This is cool. I don't mind busting out Google Translate to enjoy a fic. That mouse-hovering feature that lets you add alternative text to a fic on ao3 is super useful for this sort of thing.

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

My first, and only other, fandom: My Little Pony. I was 12.

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

I love them all for different reasons, BUT Among the Many Souls has blood and sex and drama in it, so yeah. It's in the lead.

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

5 – Do you respond to comments?

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

[digi-tama-in-your-pocket]

I've been on a real comic book kick lately. I'm mostly fixated on Batman at the moment ( his partner would totally be Cyberdramon btw, maybe tukaimon as the rookie stage ) but it got me thinking about how id love to see more collaboration between the western comics scene and the japanese manga scene, we've got a Naruto meets Ninja Turtles crossover coming soon, DC and Marvel already dabbled in manga and anime versions of their stuff, and we have various netflix adaptations of anime, and a few movies. Admittedly, I wish when it came to the western side of things, we'd stop doing so much live action and start doing animation and comics.

I'm getting rambling a little off topic here. It led me to think back, and I swear I have a memory of manga releasing as single floppy issues on american comic book racks. I distinctly remember Dragon Ball Z, Sailor Moon, Pokemon Adventures, and The Electric Tale of Pikachu all releasing each chapter as a single stand alone comic book. I just can't seem to find any evidence of this... but tell you what I do remember though...

These western adaptations of the Digimon Anime, mostly just a 1:1 recration, hand drawn, rather than, whatchacallem, those "Cinemangas" that used to take up space on the shelf at Borders.

Look at these fucking covers.

I love them so much. The composition of each one really has the attention grabbing energy that so many comics on store shelves had to have at the time. Although only 12 issues were published in the west, it looks like other territories got the whole she-bang, and even Adventure 02, Frontier, and Tamers got comics.

I'd love to see these all re-released in glorious full color, even if it's only digitally... however, we all know that's never going to happen. I'm sure these comics are wrapped in all kinds of legal red tape and Bandai probabl doesn't even know they exist.

That being said...

it would be so cool to see a brand new ongoing comic book in the west set in the world of Digimon. I know the western comic book scene has it's issues but one thing they do very well is explore an established canon from all sorts of different angles. And the best part is, purists who don't want this, don't have to read it.

And I'd kind of like a Tamagotchi comic too, that's kind of what I thought that "time travel" shell was at first, but alas. And I think that's even less likely than a Digimon Dark Horse reprint, because.. well I don't think a tamagotchi comic would sell even a little. We can't even get the anime subbed and fans aren't interested. No chance a comic book could happen.