#i'm in so many shambles i think i need to nap about it. like i am so.

[hua-fei-hua]

*queues up a bunch of posts w/o commentary in the tags bc experiencing Story(tm) has left me a husk of emotion w/o the strength to speak abt it*

[girltomboy]

At last the sun has reached the 13th degree, conjunct Mercury retrograde, and is illuminating my Ascendant, along with my other angles, and the moon in Gemini squared Saturn today. So today tested me on all fronts tbh, my bf was acting weird this morning when he called me. And kept making ironic remarks that I honestly didn't appreciate because I had just woken up. And jokingly complaining about stuff. Then mom texted me asking "Don't you miss me at all? :(" because I neglected to text her back yesterday, but my excuse is that I literally didn't do anything new. And I'm tired of just telling her that I'm fine and that the weather is getting colder, over and over. But maybe she isn't, and she really just needs to know. I know she feels alone and misses me and grandma, and I really did feel bad for being silent. Then my manager finally confronted me about all the tasks I've been putting off, asking me if everything is okay and if there's anything she can help me with. And I broke down because I'd really been so careless and avoidant with my work, but the truth is that the thought of having to call my customers back has been causing me some really terrible anxiety, especially with the avalanche of errors and badly-checked situations we've been having. But I've also been postponing some pretty simple and innocent stuff, so I don't think any of my excuses are valid. The worst part of it all is that I really did not have any reason to be avoidant and fearful, but now she thinks I'm going through something. And it's just anxiety. I worried her for nothing. I just was honest with her, apologized, and told her I'll try to deal with all of them asap. Which I did, I spent my day going through the list of unfinished tasks and checked/closed as many as I could. My manager was super understanding, she was mainly worried about me, told me to take it easy and told me she gets exactly where I'm coming from. I felt awful for having been so irresponsible and had a full blown panic attack while texting her. I've also been reevaluating my overall lifestyle and concluded that I've been living like shit and I need a reset. Like my entire apartment is messy, my diet is in shambles, my work is... well, I've just been neglectful in most aspects of my life is basically the idea. I wanted to go to the office after work to pick up a book I borrowed, but the site said it was still on its way, even though the delivery date was today. So I'm probably gonna save that for tomorrow, and rn I think I just need a nap because I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted and drained. And after I get some rest and wake up, I'm gonna go grocery shopping.

[masterwords]

not the knives

A/N: This little chunk of madness was written because @toli-a challenged me to write something for a prompt. It's totally intended to be "heist" related but because I live inside the brain I do...it is not. I had a few heist/undercover related ideas and none of them came together...and then this appeared to me. It is lighthearted and I think in the spirit of the prompt regardless. (Prompt(s): “I think that went wrong in every way it could’ve.” and “I mean, it could’ve been worse.”)

Warnings: Derek drinks some beer. I don't know.

1.4k words of pure domestic homeowner...stuff.

**

“Derek,” Hotch says quietly, nudging him with one bony elbow. Derek ignores him. “Derek...buy a candy bar or chapstick. Something other than this." He indicates the knives, the hammer and massive box of contractor bags like it's damning evidence of misbehavior. "It looks a little...”

“I don't want a candy bar.”

He wants to get back to the house to finish their project. That's all he wants. It's 2am and Walmart is always a nightmare but at this time of night it's particularly awful. “What about chapstick?”

He glares at Hotch who shrugs and tosses a pack of gum and a tube of waxy cherry chapstick on the belt, tired of waiting. Derek's turn to make the noise of disapproval. Hotch yawns while he pays and Derek throws the hammer and the box of bags under one arm, holds the box of steak knives with his free hand. Sean would have a fit if he knew they were buying kitchen knives from Walmart but considering that they would need them the following day and all of their previous set was wrapped tight in newspaper and sitting in the trash on the curb...beggars can't be choosers. The cashier hands Hotch the chapstick and gum, just drops them into his palm with a funny little look.

“Thank you,” Hotch says, reaching into his pocket for the car keys.

The house is in one piece, for the most part, or at least in as many pieces as they left it. Hotch's stomach twists in knots as he pulls into the driveway. He knows what awaits them inside.

“I'm sorry,” he offers quietly while they sit in the car and stare at the house, knowing what awaits them. Knowing that inside there's a kitchen in shambles. This isn't his first apology and they both know it won't be his last.

“It's not your fault.” Derek had said it over and over, but that isn't exactly true. It is his fault. He woke up feeling under the weather, riding the storm of a migraine until he couldn't keep it up any longer. Until the vertigo started kicking his ass while he washed dishes. He needed a nap; it would be a simple fix. Pop a pill, sleep until it kicked in, salvage the evening. Asking Jack to load the dishwasher without any real instruction, assuming it would be the same as at their apartment only to have it flood the kitchen had been a sad start, but it was manageable. They were able to pull the dishwasher out and bust up some drywall that was damaged, replace it easily and put out a fan to dry the rest that was salvageable. All that was okay, kids are kids and he has no real way of knowing that the way he loaded big things on top would make the sprayer malfunction. Derek's dishwasher is older than the one he was used to, it was a little more finnicky. Live and learn. A quick tutorial from Derek would solve any future catastrophes.

But then they took a nap. Derek was tired, too, and it was the weekend. Jack was old enough to care for himself for a few hours, but they woke to the sound of frustrated tears and knew their troubles had multiplied. He found another spot of drywall that wasn't going to be saved, would need to be cut out and replaced...he'd watched Derek do it with his reciprocating saw and that looked so easy but he'd be in huge trouble if he used power tools without his parents nearby. So he pulled out the steak knives. The handles snapped quickly off of two, another bent, but he managed to remove the square and not cut himself. The steaks they had marinating for dinner the following night hollered at him from the fridge for his stupidity at leaving Jack to his own devices without...without what? Explaining that kitchen knives are not construction tools? Hotch doesn't even know what to say.

Jack cries and says he's sorry, even offers his entire piggy bank to pay for the knives and Derek tells him it's okay, he's just glad no one got hurt. That doesn't solve any of the problems but he's a good dad.

“I'm still sorry.”

In the kitchen, it's shockingly worse. Somehow. There seems to be more damage and it smells musty and damp. Derek has been talking so much about rot that Hotch thinks he smells it setting in. He doesn't, it's far too soon for that and they're already taking careful measures but now his anxiety is kicking in. Their tired eyes just can't register all the work they have left to do in order to take this wreckage and turn it back into a kitchen. They'll be eating out and barbecuing for a while. The industrial sized box fan is loud, rumbling and growling its way to drying the floor that's dangerously close to having enough water damage to rot if they're not careful.

Derek thinks he might have to rip some of it out and he's very very touchy about that subject. Original hardwood floors don't just grow on trees, he'd said once and it had been sort of a joke and it made Hotch smirk but he was still not fully joking. If he had to rip it up, he would never stop thinking about it. Hotch worried he might never really forgive Jack for this...or him, for that matter. They hadn't even been living here long, hadn't even fully committed to being a family for more than a few months and already they had destroyed Derek's kitchen. All the apologies and uttered I forgive you's and It's okays couldn't undo the damage.

By the time they're at a place they can stop for the night, the sun is starting to threaten her arrival and Hotch's eyes burn. His head is screaming pain that never really went away but it's a lot easier to ignore when everything falls apart around you. Derek has been hitting the beer again, because caffeine might make him explode. The beer is pale and foamy, not exactly ice cold anymore but it mellows him out until he's somewhere vaguely beneath the anger. Things happen, he thinks. Accidents happen. He isn't even mad at anyone, he's just...on edge. He loves projects, he hates emergencies. This falls square in the latter category.

"Tomorrow I'll show Jack how to patch the hole he cut," Derek offers quietly, pressing his forefinger into the gypsum and nudging a chunk loose. He's lost in thought, how this could be a learning opportunity and maybe he'll let Jack use a power tool to see the difference the right tool for the job makes. He can turn this into a learning experience and maybe then he won't walk into his kitchen and see disaster at the end. He'll see time spent teaching Jack a new skill. He really is trying to find the good in this.

“It's late,” Hotch says in hardly more than a whisper and Derek turns to look at him. He notices the bruise-colored skin beneath his eyes that exaggerates how otherworldly pale he is and he knows they need to stop or Hotch is going to collapse and then they'll be in the hospital with the way this day has gone. He already looks like he might be headed that way.

“A few more things,” Derek replies, against everything his body tells him to do. “Go get in the shower, clean up, I'll be right there.”

Hotch doesn't argue. He's been more or less useless this whole time, holding tools or finding them. It doesn't surprise him when he stumbles in the hallway and catches himself on the banister that goes upstairs to Jack's room. He's beat. Been awake for more than 24 hours at this point.

He rubs Derek's temples in bed, even though his are pulsing with his heartbeat. Thumbs pressing in small circles there first, and then dragged down the sides of his neck, squeezing the tension out of his shoulders. If he stops to consider how many times they were in the hardware store or Walmart that day he'll start laughing or crying, it's that bad.

“I think that went wrong in every way it could have,” Hotch says softly, kissing the warm back of Derek's neck. He's usually the little spoon but Derek is sulking, and he'd turned his back on Hotch, curling around his pillows instead. Derek lets out a sarcastic sounding laugh and sighs, melting against Hotch. “I mean, it could have been worse...” he mutters, and Hotch's eyes go all wide in the dark thinking about the ways that was true. Could still become true.

He falls asleep worrying about what they'll find in the morning.

[anguigenus]

Fr the prompt: a wholesome sickfic with Gus and hid dad :)

It has been 216 days and too many drafts, and I've finally written something I'm happy with giving you. Enjoy :]

~~~

In Perry’s study, the keys of his typewriter clacked away in their usual morning rhythm. Then they stopped, and Perry looked up at some small sound. “Gus? Was that you?”

There was a quiet groan from the other side of the door. Perry got up and opened it to see his son leaned up against the hallway wall. Gus looked up at him, miserable, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders and lichen dotting his face. “I think ‘m sick,” he mumbled.

Perry put a hand on Gus’ forehead. It was hot, especially compared to the cool air of the house. “So you are,” Perry sighed. He petted the top of Gus’ head comfortingly and Gus leaned into the touch. “Can you make it back to your bed by yourself? I’m going to need to send a couple quick messages and then I can take care of you.”

Gus nodded and shambled off.

As he left, Perry sat down at his crystal ball. He sent a message to the school saying that Gus was sick and wouldn’t be coming, and then one to his work saying his son was sick and he wouldn’t be coming.

After that he got up and went to the kitchen. A pot of water went on the stove to boil. Once he got Gus to take a nap he’d come back and make him some broth, like his parents had done for him. Then it was to the medicine closet to get a vial of fungicide, then to Gus’ room. When he got there, Gus had already changed back into pajamas and climbed into bed. His head alone poked out of the covers on one side, looking expectantly at Perry as he came in. There was a comfy chair pulled up next to him.

“Are you nice and comfortable?”

Gus nodded.

“Alright then. Let’s take care of that stuff growing on your face.”

“But I don’t have a beard yet,” Gus frowned. “Wait, do I? Am I going through witch puberty again?” He started scratching nervously at his face.

Perry chuckled and gently pulled his hand down. “No beard, just some fungus. And what’s this? We have an expert calling in to say you probably won’t have a beard in the future either, if I’m anything to go by.”

Gus’ ears drooped dramatically.

“But I’m sure you can if you put your mind to it. Right now let’s just focus on getting this ointment on, okay?”

Gus muttered something about how many ghosts his future beard would hold, but he wiggled a little farther out of the covers. Perry uncorked the vial and started rubbing the ointment gently into Gus’ face, ears and neck, while Gus let his eyes close. One of his ears gave a little flick to knock off a droplet of the solution as Perry put the vial away.

“I’m going to get some broth going, and you should get some sleep in the meantime. Is there anything I can get you first? Anything else you’re feeling?”

“A story!”

Perry grinned. He’d been expecting the answer, the same every time Gus was sick. “Right away, sir. First though, lets get another blanket on you. I want to make sure you’re nice and warm.”

“Like a panini,” Gus agreed.

“A panini?”

“Luz says it’s a human sandwich. They heat it up and squish it.”

“Well then,” Perry laughed, “Like a panini.” He pulled an extra comforter from under Gus’ bed and spread it out overtop the other blankets. As he did he pressed down a little, making Gug giggle.

“Now let’s see, a good story… Breaking news! We have a report in from the toes side of the city—”

By the end of the story, Gus’ eyes were drooping. Perry quietly got up and closed the door as he left. He paused for a moment, letting out a silent sigh as he heard coughing behind him. He didn’t act like he’d heard though, just went to the kitchen.

Gus had never liked letting on he was sick. It always made him miserable though, so after several bad school days, Perry had started their current arrangement. Gus got a day to be spoiled by his dad, and Perry got to make sure his son wasn’t sick on griffon hide-and-seek day again. Rummaging through the pantry, Perry pulled out the usual broth vegetables, as well as a couple extra roots that were good for a cough.

Gus still wasn’t very helpful disclosing his symptoms, but a little investigative reporting experience filled in the gaps. Perry dropped a meat bone and some spices into the pot he’d put on to boil earlier, then started chopping vegetables as a familiar smell filled the air. And even if that smell was slightly different each time Gus was sick, he hadn’t complained yet.

~~

A/N: griffon hide and seek is, of course, where you hide and a griffon seeks you. It's survival practice for the elementary schoolers. Doesn't go well when you're sick, suffice to say.

[shimano-futoshi]

So you gave us your best yakuza daddies list.. What about 10 of the least-daddiest?

You asked for it... And now You Will Get It! Welcome to shimano-futoshi's TOP TEN LEAST DADDIEST DADDIES OF THE YAKUZA!!!

And Now... NUMBER 10....!!!

10: KANDA TSUYOSHI:

Me: Can we get Shimano? Mom: We have Shimano at home. Shimano at home:. What a disgraceful excuse for a daddy. Like, it's obvious he's trying to be Japan's Next Top Shimano but it's FAILING. You are FAILING, Kanda. Do us a favour and just go. Leave. You will NEVER BE A DADDY!!!

9: SHIBUSAWA KEIJI:

Wow. Just wow. You didn't even try, did you Shibusawa? That underwhelming suit, that hairstyle you'd catch on a twelve year old trying to look like his favourite Tick Tock influencers. And what have you brought to the Yakuza, Shibusawa? Oh? The final boss of Y0? The shadowy manipulator behind the curtain? Oh, yes, I remember that, but only because you SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN!! Talk about disappointing villains. Should've stayed the tertiary, mate. Never will you be DADDY!

8: NIHARA TAKASHI:

Look, Nihara, I like you. I really do. More... Granddaddy material though. I get what you're trying to do, but I don't think it's working. Like, "acting chairman"? Really? Big whoop. I'm sorry grandpa, but I hope you've got your bus pass, because only DADDIES will be getting a ride home with me!

7: SHINDO KOJI:

Do you like daddy's katana, kitten? This guy looks like he frequents right wing message boards and that IMMEDIATELY DISQUALIFIES HIM FOR DADDYSHIP. I don't care how many slurs you call me or how your dad will get me banned from Discord, you will not be a daddy for as long as I live and breathe, Shindo!. And no, I also don't care that your "kittens" seem to think so. They're stupid and probably get their DDLG knowledge from Tumblr.

6: TACHIBANA TETSU:

Hm. Ok, ok, like, I get you. Sugar Daddy and all that, but you're just too TWINKY, Tachibana! It looks like your face hasn't changed since you were 5! Don't get me wrong, you're adorable, but DADDIES AREN'T ADORABLE! Goodbye, but take this link for my Amazon wishlist with you if you'd rather be above a few more on this list ;)

5: NISHIKIYAMA AKIRA (PRE-EVILIFICATION):

Suffers from Tachibana-itis... Too twinky! Too adorable! Don't worry, Baby Nishiki, you will grow up to be quite the daddy one day, but for now, we will have to wait... However, I am getting quite impatient. Wait, are you? Are you crying??? That is NOT DADDY BEHAVIOUR! GET OUT, you're making the chair soggy!

4: MEDIA KING:

There is nothing "king" about you, Media King... Daddies must be clean, well dressed, and humble. But you look greasy, are dressed in these gaudy, awful clothes, and are a self proclaimed "king"? I'm afraid your words mean nothing because DADDIES ARE CHOSEN, and you certainly haven't been, today! Also, why did your boss fight have to take so long to get to? The mere fact that I had to see your Bars Go Up for HOURS made me sick of you before we even met.

3: PATRIARCH GONDAWARA:

How much more opposite to a daddy could you get, Gondawara!? Diapers are for BABIES, dummies are for BABIES! You don't see any DADDIES DOING POOPY in their pants, do you?! No, I didn't think so! You may be number one baby, but you are number three worst DADDY! Now get out of here, I'm sure it's nap time.

2: NISHIDA:

Babyface strikes yet again, but dear Nishida here hasn't even TRIED to do anything to up his daddiness... You see, DADDIES TAKE CONTROL, Nishida, but you're content with being number two. That's just not going to cut the mustard, but I'm sure you'd need someone to do that for you anyway! Now go on, shoo, I think I hear Majima calling for his tea!

And, finally, the LEAST DADDIEST DADDY OF ALL YAKUZA EVER IS...

1: TERADA YUKIO:

What have we learned in this list? That daddies must be HANDSOME, able to take CONTROL, have an IMPECCABLE WARDROBE, and be SURE OF THEIR DECISIONS. Terada. You fall into ZERO of these categories. You look like a sentient thumb, the Tojo was in shambles while you were chairman, your outfit is atrociously boring, and you couldn't decide if you wanted to be dead or not! Look at you. What a disgrace! Truly the WORST DADDY to have ever lived, died, lived again, and died again! My only regret is you not dying for a third time! Oh, and you also KILLED THE NUMBER ONE DADDY SHIMANO! Even if you worked your hardest. Bought all the plastic surgery you could, wrangled the Tojo into submission, replaced all your clothes with Gucci and decided to Live On... You could never be a Daddy. Not after what you've done. Your Shin (Shimano Sin) is too great, and for that you will remain Yakuza's Least Daddiest Daddy for the rest of eternity.

[possiamo-andare]

No More Divisions - Chapter Three: The Jacuzzi

JJ x Original Character

I'd like to give a small shoutout to @fangirling-allday for giving me such a sweet comment. You have inspired me to write another chapter so this one is dedicated to you! <3

MASTERLIST

~

If I could only describe Sarah's younger sister, Wheezie, in one word it'd be difficult. I've met her a total of two times and both times she's been difficult. She always has to put her two cents into every conversation and she asks so many questions.

Trust me, I love curious people but Wheezie isn't just curious, she's nosy. She's basically the stereotypical annoying younger sister.

With that being said, she no longer was difficult to me anymore. She was our hero. The cup with the string attached to it ended up being a makeshift phone where Wheezie could hear us from her room.

At first, Sarah was going to try and explain to Wheezie the truth but it was clear that within the first few minutes of talking to her, Rafe had gotten to her first and poisoned her mind.

So, since telling the truth didn't work, we decided to lure her into Sarah's room. Our plan was to get Sarah to fake cry hard enough to get Wheezie to unlock the door to come comfort her sister. When she opened the door, we'd then explain to her that we needed her to pretend to be us in the room as we slipped out the front door.

This plan was foolproof.

That is, until Wheezie asked a question we hadn't even thought she'd ask.

"If John B. didn't do it, who did?"

Sarah and I looked at each other as this child stood in front of us, begging to know the truth. We didn't know what to say. How do you tell a child that their brother was a murderer? Sarah shook her head at me. It wasn't the time nor place. Wheezie would find out eventually but not right now.

"We have to do something first," I say, crouching down to meet her gaze. "But you need to promise us that you'll be here for as long as you can."

Wheezie nodded, furrowing her brows together. I could tell she still didn't understand what was going on but she wanted to help out as best she could.

"Can you do that for us?" Sarah asked, her pinkie out towards her sister.

Wheezie nodded again, this time holding onto Sarah's pinkie finger with her own.

We tucked Wheezie into Sarah's bed and created another "person" under the sheets with a pillow and blacket so it would seem as if Sarah and I took a nap. After we said our goodbyes, we turned off the lights and quietly made our way downstairs.

I was barely breathing as we crept down the stairs, hoping not to cause a commotion even by breathing heavily. Once we successfully made it down the stairs, Sarah led me to the sliding windows in the back on the house. As Sarah quietly opened them, I was the lookout. I could hear the faint distance of talking with the tv drowning out what the actual words between the two people were. I could tell Ward and Rafe were bickering but I couldn't make out what they were saying, only that Ward was mad.

Sarah nudged me softly, getting my attention as she pointed to the open sliding doors. We quickly made our way out of the house before quietly closing the doors again.

After the doors were fully closed, we took off running. Sarah's bike was at the front of her house and now that it was darker, we were sure that Ward or Rafe couldn't see us from outside.

Once we found Sarah's bike, Sarah told me to sit on the handlebars as she rode out of the neighbourhood. She said she had a suspicion where John B. was and wanted to see if she was right. Once we made it out of the neighbourhood, we were swarmed with flashlights and dozens of people looking for John B. Apparently there was a $25,000 reward for whoever caught him and everyone in OBX was making it their mission to find him. People young and old, even children, perused the streets calling out for John B. as if there was any way in hell he'd answer back.

As we rode, we stopped to ask people where they were going. Some were going to the ferry, others were going to the docks where they knew many Pogues hung out but what we found was that no one was going to the Bell Tower, where Sarah believed John B. was. Although I wanted to go with her and make sure she was safe, I knew I couldn't go.

"I can't go with you." I say to Sarah as she peddles forward.

"What?" Sarah asks, holding onto her breaks as her bike comes to a stop.

"I have to go to JJ's house and help them. I'm sure they are doing something for John B. there. They need my help more than you do." I say, getting off the handle bars and crossing my arms over my stomach this time.

Since my clothes were stained with blood, Sarah lent me her clothes. Everything she had was cropped which wasn't usually my style but it was the only option. I had changed into a purple tube top with black ripped jean shorts and although Sarah said I looked awesome, this cropped top made me super self conscious.

"Okay. I'll give you JJ's address and you help him and Kiara and Pope. I'll find John B. We'll meet at the JJ's father's dock at 3pm tomorrow. Okay?" Sarah smiles at me, grabbing my arm for a moment to reassure me. She tells me JJ's address and I repeat it back to her to remember it.

I nod to her as a way of saying bye. "Okay. See you tomorrow. Stay safe until then."

We both smile at eachother and then briefly hug. It's weird that even in a time like this, where our lives are literally in shambles, we still have the time to smile and hug eachother.

"Love you Callie." Sarah whispers to me as we hug.

I pull away from her. "Love you Sarah."

And with that, Sarah is off again. She peddles away from me, not looking back once. I stay completely still until I can't see her anymore. Until she's into the woods so much so that she becomes a dark little speck.

Once Sarah's completely gone, I take off running like a madman. I run on the pavement, my sneakers slamming down on the sidewalk the faster I run. I run down one street and turn and then turn again. I continue to run until I don't recognize the houses as Kook houses but Pogue houses. I run until I get to JJ's street and I count the number of houses I pass until I come upon JJ's.

JJ's house is more like a shack than a home. A home is where you feel safe and cozy. I don't think I'd ever feel safe here. The screen on one of the sides of the house is ripped. It looks like somebody ran through it and I wouldn't be surprised if someone did. JJ had a reputation after all. He got into fights, stole, and hated Kooks. He hated them so much that he'd start fights with them for no reason. This made me question why he was so nice to me. I understood why he was nice to Sarah, but why me? If I was a Kook and he hated Kooks, why was he nice to me?

I decide that since it's so late, not to ring on the doorbell but instead make my way to the backyard and see if anyone's there. Once I get closer to the backyard, I hear people talking and I hear a distinct voice. I recognize it as Kiara's.

"Pope make sure you get two gallons of gas. Not one. He'll need two if he's ever gonna cross the border."

I try to make my way quietly over to them but a stick breaks under the pressure of my foot and it makes a loud noise.

"Who's there?!" JJ yells from his place on the jacuzzi.

Wait. A jacuzzi? Why does his house look like a shack, but he has a jacuzzi.

It was dark when I first arrived but someone turned on the lights and I soon see all three of John B.'s friends much more clearly. Pope is sitting on the floor beside Kiara who is sitting on a chair in front of JJ, who is sitting on the ledge of the jacuzzi. They all look very happy to be with one another, even though something bad is happening to their friend. I guess that's what happens when your only family is your friends; you're always glad to see them.

"It's me, Callie." I say, loud enough for them to hear. I'm only 10 feet away from them now and I can see all of them turn around in shock this time. JJ is literally so shocked to see me he stands up to greet me.

"C-callie." JJ stutters.

"Where's Sarah?" Kiara asks, walking up to me and giving me a hug. I return it with open arms.

Kiara was always so nice to me even if Sarah and her didn't get along.

Sarah always told me not to talk to Sarah but Kiara and I shared the same biology class and our interest in the environment allowed for us to bond. We were never close and rarely spoke outside of school but she was a sweet girl and I'm so glad Sarah and Kiara are friends again. Maybe after all of this is over, we can finally hang out. If all of this ever is over.

"She's looking for John B. She says she knows where he is." I reply as Kiara pulls away from me and I get a chance to greet everyone.

I hug Pope briefly. He was always nice to me whenever he saw me with his father and I think we've talked about four times. Each time he was sweet and very pleasant so I'm glad he's here to help. I can tell he's very on edge about the whole situation and I'm not surprised if I look as nervous as him.

Then there's JJ. I make my way to him and give him an awkward hug. He pats my back and then we quickly move away from each other. I've never talked to him before and I've never heard good things. Yet, all of those bad things were from Rafe and he's not exactly a model citizen. I decide to see how he is now and make my own decisions about his personality.

There's a small amount of silence that passes through us and Pope breaks it by talking. "Did you actually see Rafe kill the Sheriff?"

I nod. Kiara, JJ, and Pope all look at eachother in disbelief. They knew Rafe was crazy but never like this. I don't think anyone could think Rafe could do this, no matter how cruel he was.

I want to change the subject so badly that I end up asking, "What were you guys just doing?" I glance at the notebook on Kiara's chair.

It has all their names on it with different things to do. Pope is supposed to get two gallons of gas, Kiara is suppose to get food from her parents restaurant and JJ is supposed to get his dad's keys. This is definitely a list of things for them to do but I don't know what for.

"We're getting a boat for John B. with food and gas so he can get away." Pope answers me.

I look to Kiara who is not meeting my gaze. "I thought we were gonna clear his name."

I hear JJ scoff from behind me. "Yeah, we tried that. These officers have tunnel vision. John B. has to leave, at least until we can clear his name."

I turn and look to JJ. I could tell he's been observing me since I came. I know he doesn't trust me like Kiara and Pope do. I dont know why but my gut tells me it's because I'm a Kook and he hasn't had the best experiences with Kooks.

"How can I help?" I ask, turning to face everyone. They've all gathered around me now and I'm ready to hear what they have to say.

"JJ is gonna give me a hand with getting all of John B.'s food. You can help. We need some extra hands." Kiara says, grabbing her notebook and writing it down.

I nod. "Okay."

"Well," JJ sighs, looking to Kiara. "I hope you know what you're doing."

Kiara rolls her eyes at JJ and then looks to me. "I do."

~

After each plan is made down to the last detail, I finally feel a little at peace. The final plan is that Pope is gonna take two gallons of gas from his dad's shop and try not to get caught (I hope that Mr. Heyward is not too pissed off). JJ, Kiara and I will get food from her dad's restaurant for John B. for at least two weeks. And JJ will steal the keys to his father's old racing boat. We will all meet at the garage where the boat is at the bring it back to JJ father's dock for 3pm tomorrow.

After everything is written and memorized, we all lay blankets down on the floor and decide to sleep. I take the edge and Kiara takes the other. Pope takes a spot beside Kiara while I get stuck with JJ. I'm not facing him when he lays down so I can't tell if he's disappointed or not but I can imagine he's not exactly thrilled to sleep beside me.

"Night." Kiara yawns before turning over. Pope does the same and before I can reply, I hear their soft snores.

JJ says nothing to me and I actually like it that way. I'm beyond exhausted and I don't want to have to deal with him if he's just gonna be cruel. He hasn't be outright mean to me but he hasnt exactly been hospitable while I've been here so I'm a little scared to talk to him alone.

Five minutes later, I'm asleep and dreaming. Except dreaming is supposed to be fun but this is a complete nightmare.

I see the sheriff on the floor like how I did this morning and I try to rush towards her. I'm calling out to her and running as fast as my feet will take me but she's just getting father and farther away. I am forced to watch her bleed out but I'm not getting any closer. I look down at my feet and see that my feet are stuck in cement and I can't move them. I'm yelling to the Sheriff but she can't hear me. I'm drenched in blood and I see Rafe. He's looking right at me. I call to him and he laughs and lifts his right hand to point a gun at me.

Before I can scream, I wake up. It's almost dawn now and the space where JJ was sleeping is empty. I sit up and look around.

Kiara and Pope are still sleeping. They look so cute cuddled up together. I look around more, trying to find JJ. I finally find him in the jacuzzi.

The water is up to his chest but the jacuzzi is not on. He's just sitting in a jacuzzi that's not on which has to be one of the most depressing things I've ever seen. My heart aches for him. There is something up and I want to make him feel better.

I stand up and walk towards the jacuzzi and where JJ is sitting. He's playing with the water and moving it with his hands. I don't think he realizes he's even doing it. Once I get to the jacuzzi, I rest my elbow on the ledge and JJ finally sees me.

"What are you doing up?" He asks, a little surprised to see me.

"I should ask you the same thing." I smirk, letting one of my hands touch the water. It's hot. He must've just got in.

"I can't sleep." He says. He seems detached and cold, as if he doesn't want to talk about something.

"Bad dream?" I ask. I don't mean to pry but sometimes I can't help it. Especially when someone is feeling sad. I want to help.

JJ nods. He quickly looks up to me but then quickly looks back to the water.

"Same actually." I sigh, my hand now also absentmindedly playing with the water.

"About the Sheriff?" JJ asks, actually holding eye contact with me this time.

I nod. "How did you know?"

"You were yelling her name." JJ answered, closing his eyes for a second to take a deep breath. "This jacuzzi actually helps me with my anxiety alot. Especially with nightmares."

"Really?" I ask, a little skeptical on why he's brought this up.

"Yep." JJ nods, finally moving closer to me. "Would you like to come in?"

I don't know whether I should or not. On one hand, I barely know this guy and he's already indirectly asked to to strip and get into a jacuzzi with him. On the other hand, I bet that hot water would feel amazing on my skin and very relaxing. Even though my better judgement tells me no, I go against in. I might get arrested for aiding and abetting tomorrow so what the hell.

"Okay, but close your eyes until I get in." I narrow my eyes at him, being a little sarcastic but at the same time I'm completely serious.

JJ rolls his eyes. "Please, don't flatter yourself Kook."

I frown. "Just do it."

JJ nods and closes his eyes and then covers his closed eyes with his hands. Once I know he's not peeking, I take off my sneakers and unbuckle my jeans. I lift my tube top over my head and lay it neatly beside all if my other clothes. Now I'm in my black underwear and pink strapless bra. I curse Sarah in my brain. If I knew a boy was gonna see my bra and underwear today, I would've told her to make them match.

I slowly get into the water as JJ sits across from me, hands still over his eyes. It's really warm and my skin starts having goosebumps the more I emerge myself in the water. Once the water gets to my shoulder, I shudder a little. This water feels amazing on my muscles. I've been running around and fighting all day yesterday that I completely forgot what it did to my body. Now, I realize how achy I really am.

"Okay." I say, my hands absentmindedly playing with the water between my fingers.

JJ finally uncovers his eyes and opens them. When he does, there's a smirk on his face. And it's directed towards me which is super surprising.

"Feels nice, right?"

I nod and continue to play with the water. "What's this beauty's name?"

JJ smirks. "Finally someone who appreciates the finer things in life."

I laugh. "I'm thinking Cherry." Cherry was a Kook JJ had slept with last year and I had only heard about it because she had slept outside his house overnight to prove her devotion to him. It was just about the funniest thing ever. Sad to say it didn't work out between them.

JJ rolls his eyes. "Although that is a very good guess, it's actually called cat's ass."

I snorted. "You weirdo."

JJ rolls his eyes. "I think it's weirder you remember Cherry. You obsessed with me or something Callie?"

This time I roll my eyes. "Cherry was the funniest story ever. The day I start to like you JJ is the day of my demise."

"Well, I think this is the start of your demise then."

I don't say anything but I kinda know JJ's correct. Before long there's a silence between us. It's not like last time. This time, it's a comfortable silence. Like we're both just relaxing together and not worrying about John B. or Sarah or the Royal Merchant.

"What was your dream about?" I ask, my eyes closed now. I could fall asleep like this if JJ wasn't here.

When JJ doesn't answer me, I try not to take it personally. Only when I hear the water moving a little too loudly, I open my eyes. JJ is moving towards me and now I'm super aware that I'm basically naked. In an attempt for him not to see my bra, I cross my arms over my chest.

When he finally sits beside me, he speaks, "You don't wanna know."

I scoff. "Oh yeah, sorry my little privileged ass could never handle your mind." My tone is dripping with sarcasm and JJ is smiling as I speak.

"Yeah basically." JJ confirms, only making me more pissed off.

"I know that my demons could never compare to yours, but I have them too." I roll my eyes at him and look to the water, away from his gaze.

"What demons? You're a Kook." I could feel his smirk as he said this.

I look back to him. "Being a Kook doesn't protect you from the bad shit in life. Hasn't what's happened yesterday proved that?"

JJ doesn't answer me. For a moment, he's just taking in what I've said. I don't think anyone's ever done that. I don't think anyone's ever just thought about what I said so deeply as JJ is now.

Finally, he speaks. "Are you still with Rafe?"

I scan JJ's face for a moment before answering. Does he wanna know because he thinks I'm gonna betray them or because he wants to know if I'm taken. I can't tell but either way I'm gonna answer him.

"No, we broke up weeks ago." When I answer, I make sure to see JJ's reaction but he gives me no reaction. This guy is really good at hiding his emotions.

"Cool." I want to ask him what he's thinking but I can't.

I want to look away from him but I can't. JJ is acting so differently from when I first met him that I can't help but start to like him. He's already changed his views on me by talking to me. I know he'll never like or trust me 100%, but to know he respects me enough helps.

There's been a long silence between us and I want it to end.

"So," I say, wanting this awkwardness to stop. "What was your dream about?"

JJ takes a deep breath and looks away from me. We must've been staring in each other's eyes for 10 minutes. It feels like that anyways.

He doesn't answer me again, just stands up from the jacuzzi and hops out. He grabs a towel that was hanging from a wire and dries off his swimming trunks before hanging it back up on the wire. Then I see it. There's purple spots all over his torso. He looks like he just got into a fight and he wasn't the winner. I look for defensive wounds but there's none I can see. Taking a beating and not defending yourself does not seem like something JJ would do. I realize that maybe he didn't fight back because he cared for the person beating him.

As he puts on his shirt, I speak up. "Did your dad do that?" I'm still in the water and I feel a little colder now that JJ is no longer inside.

He looks up at me once he has his shirt on. "We all have different demons Callie. Some are just worse than others."

And with that, he's walking back to where Kiara and Pope are sleeping. And I'm stuck here, in a jacuzzi I don't even want to be in anymore. It's not the same without JJ.

[sanjuno]

I'm interested in that idea you mentioned where the Vongola brothers thaw Xanxus, pack up their followers, and go to Japan. (Tsuna getting four older brothers would be awesome.)

*slams back onto the blog* MY INTERNET IS BACK AND SANJUNO IS ONLINE AGAIN, BITCHES!

I call this one FIRE SHALL WAKEN and I straight up admit that I did not expect this much of a plot for something that was essentially an offhand comment I made because I thought it was funny but oh well.

Let’s begin!

So sixteen year old Xanxus discovers that he’s “adopted” before Enrico gets fatally shot in the back but instead of going to talk to his brothers he still goes through with the Cradle Affair tantrum.

>Enrico, Mas, and Fede are confined to the Iron Fort by Coyote because of paranoia about the Varia being more loyal to Xanxus than the Vongola overall.

>Squalo is bereaved because his Sky is frozen solid and proceeds to lose it on Enrico when confronted about why Xanxus went bonkers and now Enrico knows everything.

Enrico, of course, proceeds to tell Mas and Fede why Xanxus tried to kill Nono dead.

>Fede points out how interesting it is that Xanxus waited until all of his brothers were outside the Iron Fort before attacking.

>Enrico points out that Xan had been noticeably avoiding Nono but hadn’t cut his brothers out of his life.

>Mas digs up the security footage and notices that Xanxus said many nasty things about Nono but didn’t so much as mention his brothers during his ranting. (My how interesting…)

Enrico proceeds to move into the Iron Fort to “help Papa out” which translated into actual intent means “scope out the security system with an eye for breaking it and locate Xan’s iceberg.”

>Mas moves into the Varia mansion to “keep an eye on things”

>Fede invades the CEDEF on the regular to find out what they know and also to sow confusion because fuck you Nono is why

Consequences are suffered by those who took action without thinking! 

>Enrico also gets an up-close view of Nono’s bullshit in action, which he never saw in canon because it was never pointed out so blatantly until Nono (i) lied about matters of succession and (ii) froze Enrico’s littlest brother in ice.

>Mas gets to conspire with the Varia and has tons of fun pretending to be thick while plotting the demise of his enemies.

>Fede undermines Iemitsu in the CEDEF without actually joining that branch because Mas is the one who wanted to play spy games for a living and Fede is much better suited to being the Family troubleshooter. Also Mas and Fede poach several CEDEF agents because Sky Attraction and Iemitsu Doesn’t Deserve Nice Things bwahahaha~

Shortly after Nono’s sons finish “establishing order” after the Cradle Affair Nono and Iemitsu go on a trip to Japan (we all know what happens here) except this time:

>(i) Fede is keeping a close enough eye on the CEDEF to discover what the purpose behind the trip was and (ii) the Bros di Vongola are making plans to rescue their baby brother and leave the Vongola hanging without any Heirs at all because Nono certainly doesn’t care about the succession so why should they?

Instead of possessing people to arrange the deaths of the 10th Gen Vongola Heirs, Daemon Spade’s ghost is very much in favour of the boys rejecting their father because anarchy and Fuck Them All Very Much

>Daemon doesn’t approve of Nono, so the more the bros work against Nono the more Daemon likes them. The irony of them all packing up and moving to Japan to force Nono to clean up his own fucking mess is too brilliant to sabotage. He needs to know how this ends.

It takes two years for everything to be in place for the 10th Gen migration. Many changes from canon occur during this time.

(i) Enrico finally tracks down Xan’s Mama and Harmonizes her as his Mist.

>Goes to the Falco Heir’s piano recital and bonds Bianche as his Storm. Is horrified by Hayato’s treatment and frequent poisonings, draws emotionally driven parallels between Hayato’s treatment and Xanuxs’, and intercepts Hayato’s first attempt to run away to take Hayato in as his ward.

>Manages to Harmonize with Lal as his Rain over the course of several meetings with Fede for information exchanges.

>Visits the Bovino and finds Ottavia to be his Lightning, and she brings newborn Lambo with her because her sister died.

>Snags M.M. to be his Sun out of Paris’ Underworld Theatre District before she crosses the line and is arrested by the Vindice. (He’s there on business but yay new Element!)

>Enrico is somewhat disturbed by how much younger than him his Storm and Sun are and hopes that his Cloud will be closer to his own age or older.

(ii) Mas met Sparta (the OC I have as his Cloud) in his last year of the Mafia Academy. She gets along well with the Varia.

>Mas is being very careful and low-key about Courting Oregano and Tumeric into his Harmony because Iemitsu is a giant bag of dicks and also a toxic influence.

>Moretti the Murdered is Mas’ Mist and it’s hilarious because the Varia are So Offended.

Fede’s Lightning is Romeo Bovino who is ultimately distracted by finding HIS SKY!!!! and entirely forgets to flirt with Bianchi and thus survives yay

>Runs into Lancia while out shopping with Hayato and his Intuition says “Look it’s your Storm” and also Hayato is a vicious little savage who charms Mukuro and Co. and can sympathize with their experiences re. being tortured by your family. Frequent interaction with the Varia gives Mukuro and Co.s vengeance drive a constructive outlet so they don’t murderspree their way into Vindicare and also the plan to abscond will leave the Vongola Alliance in shambles and Mukuro wants to see that. So. Let’s be friends!

>Fede picks up Basil as his Rain while stalking the CEDEF because Iemitsu doesn’t deserve to have such a cute little minion and also the family resemblance is pretty obvious even if the kid isn’t a Sky.

>Accidentally Harmonizes Shamal as his Mist while tracking down Hayato and Bianchi’s medical records and lambasts Shamal for not treating Hayato’s poison damage just because he’s a boy (you irresponsible asshole) Shamal spends a significant amount of time repenting for that bullshit because Fede’s Not Having It.

Despite all the Harmonizing happening Nono continues to believe that the men he assigned to his sons are their actual Guardians.

>The bros let Nono think this because it a good distraction tactic and it gives them a guaranteed way to feed Nono misinformation about what they’re up to.

Two years is a long enough time for people to start noticing the shenanigans but the bros are good at being sneaky and also they all have Mists so good fucking luck getting a clear picture of what they’re getting up to. Then Nono goes to an Alliance Boss meting at Mafia Land and takes Iemitsu with him which means now’s our chance.

>As soon as Nono’s plane takes off the 10th gen defrosts Xan, rolls him into a blanket burrito, shoves him at his very confused Guardians, and packs the entirety of the Varia plus the Vongola 10th Gen’s personal following into a series of transport containers and take off for Japan.

>Enrico shoots Ottavio in the head execution style with one of Daniela’s crossbows before they leave because “fuck you, traitor” is why.

The Alliance is shook.

>Dino is still in training with Reborn (being around 16 or 17) and is high-key jealous that his Vongola counterparts got to fuck off and ditch their inheritance. Romario’s the one who digs up the old Tradition about “escaping” the Mafia by moving to Japan (which also includes a kind of “diplomatic immunity” agreement with the yakuza.) Dino wants to go to Japan too T-T

MEANWHILE IN JAPAN

>Xanxus is really fucking confused right now okay this is not how he was expecting his confrontation with Nono over his heritage to shake out (His bros picked Xanxus over Nono WTF)

>The Varia are honestly just happy to have their Sky back they don’t even care about technically being in hiding.

The Vongola 10th Gen buys a Japanese Mansion in Namimori and happily settle in.

>Of course their first order of business is to go see their baby cousin~ because “fuck you, Iemtisu, answer your wife’s phone calls” is why and also they need to get that Seal off Tsuna and also, also it’ll give Hayato, Mukuro, and co. a local guide in Namimori.

>Of course, the second Enrico peels the Seal off Tsuna’s Flames the kid goes into HDWM and Harmonizes with Hayato and Mukuro on reflex and also Hyper Intuition.

Nana is over the moon because her baby boy has friends now and also she 100% takes over as the 10th Gen’s Head of Housekeeping and before anyone really has time to think about it Nana and Tsuna have moved into the mansion

>Please take a moment to consider the repercussions of having five active Skies living in a single house who all love each other and want their family to be happy. The Harmony effect is soporific, wide spread, pervasive, and Namimori is a happy, peaceful town.

Hayato is once again Tsuna’s Right Hand but this time it’s Mukuro who is the Left Hand and the chaos is beautiful.

>TBH the way a less traumatized Hayato and a more rational Mukuro mesh and work together is surprisingly functional and cooperative. Also I’m pretty sure that the first thing they do is go track down Nagi for kidnapping purposes because of psychic links and Harmony is helpful for strengthening things like that.

>Which means that Chrome doesn’t get squished by a truck! Yay! Yes, they still change her name. It’s so her parents can’t find her neener-neener

Hayato and Mukuro are little assholes and are Not Pleased by the way Tsuna has been and is still being treated at school. They proceed to concoct a multi-layered, three tiered plan to take vengeance in Tsuna’s name. There are several lists, charts, graphs, and at least one Venn Diagram because Mukuro is artistic like that.

>Kyouya is angry at first because his territory but then notices how the herbivores have started to behave themselves and that means more time for uninterrupted naps and that’s beautiful. Tetsuya is torn between elation and terror because on one hand Kyou-san has friends but on the other, far more traumatizing to the citizenry hand they’re all amoral bloodthirsty monsters.

>Anyway Kyouya founds the DC, Mukuro sets up an informant network, and Hayato takes over the student council.

Tsuyoshi isn’t sure what to make of the Sudden Assassin Migration into Namimori but at least the Sword Emperor is too distracted by his Sky being on bedrest to be hunting down retired Swordsmen.

>Tsuyoshi should maybe think about starting Takeshi’s sword training because Tsuna’s gone and made friends with Takeshi now that he’s unSealed (Fuck Everything Tsuyoshi doesn’t deserve this sort of stress)

TBH Ken probably joins the Boxing Club and Ryohei’s so happy to the extreme.

>Kyoko will join the Mist Collective in Managing Everyone’s Lives because she’s nonviolent and also a bit of an emotional manipulator. Hana is the DC Secretary and gets along far too well with Hibari-sempai for anyones comfort.

>I honestly have no real idea what Haru is up to in this AU but she probably takes over Midori and has a very loudly dramatic rivalry with Hayato for brain-crush reasons.

Chikusa is getting roped in as Hayato’s VP and they rule Namimori Elementary with decidedly Iron Fists. With spikes on.

>TBH the fact that Tsuna becomes the Chairman of the Home Ec Club is the Best Thing because Tsuna loves his Mama and he’s only fifth in line to inherit still so he can do whatever he wants and that means fluffy homemaker comfort Sky who cheers on his Guardian’s shenanigans instead of a panicked stressed out punching bag.

>Tsuna’s favourite Vongola Head is the Fourth because FORKS! and everything is beautiful and nothing hurts.

TBH I have NO IDEA how long it takes Nono to find Ottavio’s body but it’s probably really gross by then because Italy’s a hot country and also between them Enrico and Mas and Fede stole all of the CEDEF’s upper management and Iemtisu is pants at sorting paperwork.

>Then there’s panic and anarchy and very strained Alliance politics until Reborn finishes training Dino and then Reborn is sent to Namimori to train the “last” Vongola heir only to find the entire Vongola 10th Gen

>Be aware that at no point did the Varia stop taking missions which drives the 9th Gen into frothing fits because they still can’t find where they’re hiding.

This time when Tsuna says he doesn’t want to be a Mafia Boss the actual heir is still alive, sitting right beside Tsuna at the table, and is laughing at Reborn.

>Enrico straight up tells Reborn not to waste his time and that when Nono dies/retires he’ll take the Rings but not a moment before then.

>Nono forced their hands when he lied to Xan, left him for dead in the ice, and tried to force his sons to accept ill-suited Guardians without ever admitting he’d fucked up or done something wrong.

>Oh yeah, Xan needed to be revived when Enrico defrosted him it was a damn good thing all three of his bros were there to help with that and GUESS WHAT HE DID TO TSUNAYOSHI?

Dino shows up and well now the Alliance knows where the Vongola 10th Gen are hiding out.

>Drama, politicking, shenanigans, IDEK at this point I mostly just want to see the FSW!AU Tsuna and co. get dragged into a canon!TYL adventure because that shit’s hilarious and is also an entirely new story all on it’s own if I want to handle it right.

>Because there’s no Varia Arc, although if Iemitsu shows up he’s gonna be hella surprised when the “weaker” Skies kick the shit out of him because the Vongola Bros have real bonds now plus their Five Sky Harmony and shit’s insane, friends.

Shit with the Arcobaleno will go down at some point and by now I’ve internalized a preference for Reborn being Aria’s Sun Guardian because “I’m my daughter’s Sun” is a glorious clusterfuck of pun combined with a Dad joke and Reborn would revel in that so much.

>Skull is Fede’s Cloud, which is fabulous and a match made with the intent of making the world a more interesting place and also I may indulge in my secret love for Reborn/Skull in this verse because Aria’s going to marry Fede. XP

>Consiquently, Verde is Mas’ Lightning, Collonello is Enrico’s Second Rain, Mammon is (of course) Xan’s Mist, and Fon’s going to be Tsuna’s Second Storm.

I kinda wanna see Spanner be Byakuran’s Lightning in this verse because reasons but also I think I’m done for the night.

Yay. XP