#i'm gnawing at my enclosure

[auroracalisto]

the way i want you.

benedict bridgerton x fem!reader, 1.4k words summary: the reader is one of eloise's closest friends... and madly in love with benedict bridgerton. at a ball, he reveals his true feelings to them. a/n: the only mention of the reader being female is the dress and corset they are wearing. so. if you pretend to not read that, it could be gender neutral. this was an old draft with like two paragraphs that i started looking at. idk why it’s written in lowercase but the vibe is there and i'm not changing it. GIRL I JUST CHECKED AND I STARTED THIS IN APRIL OF 2022. bye. absolutely insane. (thank you past me, i actually really appreciate the inspo)

if there was anything you knew for certain, it was that you were madly in love with your dearest friend’s elder brother.

being near him made your heart thunder against the confines of your chest, threatening to be loud enough for all to hear.

your hands began to tremble, your voice began to waver.

the love you felt for him was so very obvious to everyone, it seemed, save for benedict.

eloise poked fun while penelope scolded her (for she, too, understood what it was like to love a bridgerton who didn't love her back). but deep down, eloise knew you would love her brother like no other. marriage might have been a fine prospect for benedict, but if he were to marry you, he would never wish for someone to love—you would be everything that he would need.

eloise had even quipped a time or two, teasing her brother and goading him into thinking about you. not that she would tell you, of course.

but love was a fickle thing. it worked in the oddest of ways, and quite frankly, it was hard to tell who benedict truly loved, if he loved at all.

he loved himself, and he loved his family. but eloise’s friend? the girl whom was just a few years younger than he, the one he saw blossom into a woman after several years of puberty? how could he possibly love her?

you wished he did. oh, it was a wish you made on the stars above more often than not. at any point in time, when you saw the first stars dot the sky, the wish would leave your lips.

let him love me.

please let him see me.

please let him know.

was it odd? perhaps. but in this world of expensive balls and beautiful debutantes, it didn’t seem too farfetched—especially when you loved someone. it would hurt to see them go off and love another, would it not?

your heart wasn't kind.

time wasn’t kind.

neither was your father or the corset you wore or the ballgown that seemed to itch in every crevice possible.

of course you had to choose the worst dress of all the ones you owned for this accursed ball! a repeat dress, to say the least. someone would snitch—you were sure it would be raved all about in lady whistledown's next pamphlet.

your mother was nowhere to be found while your father mingled with some of his military friends. eloise was hiding somewhere, most likely with penelope or by the buffet, and most of the bridgertons’ that had come to the ball were out in the ballroom floor, including anthony and colin.

but where was benedict?

you wouldn’t ask him to dance, despite your dance card being blank. you just wanted to see him—see his handsome face, his pretty smile.

lost in your thoughts, you didn’t realize a man was creeping up behind you until a hand found its way to your back. you nearly dropped your flute of champagne, wide eyed as you looked back at the culprit. champagne splashed by your gown, and you said a silent thank you to whatever the universe had done to prevent your repeat dress being ruined by none other than the very man of your thoughts—benedict bridgerton.

“what on earth are you doing?” you asked, quickly turning to face him.

“just coming to see my sister’s friend,” he said, a cheeky smile playing on his lips. “am i not allowed to come and talk to you anymore, miss y/n?”

your eyes widened a bit. “you—of course you’re allowed. i will not tell you what to do. but to scare me like that? what if i had spilled this on you?"

“oh, i beg your pardon,” he said. “i didn’t know you were so jumpy. had i’d known, perhaps i would’ve tried to actually scare you.”

“you are a fiend, benedict bridgerton.”

he grinned. “and you love me for it, do you not?”

your cheeks burned in embarrassment as you looked away. you cleared your throat, avoiding what you truly wanted to say: yes. “why aren’t you dancing?”

“hm. well, i was, but when mother wasn’t looking, i slipped away.”

“she’ll get onto you.”

“perhaps,” he said, scrunching his nose. “but if i’m talking to you, she will excuse it.”

you rolled your eyes. “and why is that?”

“you’re eloise’s friend. she’ll excuse it.”

you purse your lips. right. just eloise’s friend. you let out a soft sigh and nod, looking out at the ballroom floor. the song was soft and light and the party-goers danced slowly with their partners. it was a sweet song, if you had to admit to anything that night.

you wouldn’t admit your love for benedict. you couldn’t. you wouldn’t. not now, not ever.

something catches benedict’s eye and he would have up and left had he not been thinking. he cleared his throat as he looked down at you.

“come with me,” he said.

eyebrows furrowed, you glanced at him. “what?”

“you heard me,” he said. “come with me.”

you do as you’re told. you follow him, and he leads you in to a hallway. there are a few other patrons, so you are not alone with a man (oh, god, imagine the scandal), but he specifically leads you to a painting in the middle of the hall.

“a painting?” you asked.

“not just any painting,” he said. “look at it. what does it remind you of?”

you shift where you stand, looking up at it. the oil pastels are beautiful, yes, but it’s a simple painting of a beautiful woman. what’s it to remind you of?

“it looks like your sister,” you said.

he snorted softly. “no,” he said. “it’s beautiful, yes, but that’s not what i wanted you to look at.”

he pointed towards the background. just beyond the portrait of the woman lay a field of beautiful flowers, each one meticulously painted by whomever the painter had been. it looked like it must have taken a painstakingly long time to paint each individual one.

“it reminds me of all the time i do not have,” you simply said.

“oh, you are no fun, y/n!” he said. he looked down at you and smiled. “they remind me of you.”

you blinked slowly. “what?”

“beautiful and yet so unattainable, hm?”

you blinked again. “i beg your pardon?”

“look at them,” he said. “each one unique in their own way, each one hand painted by someone with enough gumption to keep on with it. whoever did it wanted their painting to be utterly beautiful and difficult to recreate. all the fine detail makes the painting that much more extraordinary.”

“wait, wait, benedict, unattainable?”

“right. well if i wanted to recreate this, it would take me some time, wouldn’t it?”

“benedict. how would something like that remind you of me?”

he smiled at you for a moment before he softly said: “you’re eloise’s friend. i couldn’t do that to her.”

“do what?”

“have you the way i want you.”

it’s simple—those seven words seemed to change everything, and it was one of the most simple things you had ever heard.

your lips part in mild shock and you took a slight step back, looking at benedict in confusion. “are… are you—“

“yes. i am in earnest, y/n.”

“why did you—“

“not say anything sooner? have you seen how aggravating eloise has been recently? i did not need to fuel her ammunition.”

“since when did—“

“for some time now.”

“will you let me—“

“no, i will not,” he interrupted again.

“i swear to the lord above that i will—“

“no swearing,” he said. “just self expression, hm? like the painting?”

“what? benedict, you’re not making any sense.”

“maybe not.” benedict smiled down at you. “come. we should head back. perhaps fill in your dance card for once.”

you frowned. “what will eloise say?”

“i do not care,” he said. “it seems to me that you care far more than i do. besides, do you not hear how she speaks to me? i think she'd be honored."

he’s right—perhaps he’s yet to say anything because the way his life had been. perhaps he hadn’t said a word because of everything he and eloise had talked about. there was always timing, and sometimes, it was just a bit off.

whatever it may be, he was here, and he was true to himself. he wanted you, and he would have you, heedless of your thoughts and what eloise wanted from either of you.

oh, the scandal, dear reader. but as long as the two of you plan to marry, whatever scandal could there truly be?

[ghostnotoast]

I'M CLAWING AT THE WALLS BECAUSE OF THE PARALLELS BETWEEN SAM AND OLIVER BANKS PLEASE

Does the story of Sam's breakdown sound familiar to anyone?? It really reminds me of Oliver Banks' story

Oliver got a job at Barclays, but he ended up having a nervous breakdown, which was the start of his fall to The End

After a while of being unemployed, he got a job at a crystal shop where he worked with Jane Prentiss (who fell into the corruption eventually)

In this case, Sam's crystal shop would be the OIAR

Oliver mentions breaking up with Graham Folger and Graham lost his parents in a car accident

ANDDD WE FIND OUT ALICE'S PARENTS ARE ALSO DEAD AND SHE'S SAM'S EX DO YOU SEE THE PARALLELS POOKIE

In tma, Graham got replaced by the not-them, so is this foreshadowing something will happen to alice god I hope not (but its also implied in tma that Graham knew more about the entities then he let on, same with Alice, remember the no glitch when she said she 'knows'?)

In this case, would Sam have his own 'Jane Prentiss'?

So far, we've been trying to draw parallels on the OIAR staff and the original archival staff,

but what if we've been making parallels with the wrong characters?

[crayycrayon]

their asses are NOT going to england. maybe spain?

[holeycondom]

we are meant to make examples out of traitors

bonus:

[sky-is-the-limit]

[infinitelystrangemachinex]

Mel and Viktor are both in an Oculorum

The prison the Black Rose have put Mel in is what "Kino" calls an Oculorum, where "According to legend, the ancients built specialized chambers to seal away false prophets." It's unclear whether this place is real and physical, but it certainly seems to be to Mel. It's built like a puzzle box that seems to probe Mel's innate abilities as a mage.

Note that these runes are like yet also unlike Hextech runes with long connected lines and hard angles, like Mel's Art Deco aesthetic, and like the prison itself and its walls.

In Zaun, something was bothering me about Viktor's home - until Jayce blew a hole in the top of the chamber, creating a spiraling tunnel of debris. So now there is a hole in the top of Viktor's chamber with a "tunnel," the same as there's a hole in the top of Mel's Oculorum:

The aesthetic of Viktor's chamber is opposite to Mel's. No squares or hard angles, only circles and fractal-like spirals, curving like Zaun and Viktor's Art Nouveau aesthetic.

But how do we know Viktor's chamber is an Oculorum, specifically? Vi and Jinx give us our biggest hint when they find the wall where their heights were marked as kids:

Which Vi and Caitlyn found in season 1 deep in the undercity, near the Shimmer addicts that Viktor later "cures":

Which was underneath a giant neon Eye of Zaun:

What does the word Oculorum mean?

"ocu" comes from the Latin "oculus," meaning "eye." "Oculorum" means something to the effect of "of the eye." Viktor's chamber stands right by where the Eye of Zaun stood.

Mel is imprisoned while Viktor appears free, but is also in effect trapped. Mel is "the child" the Black Rose was searching for, possibly with magical or even semi-divine heritage. Viktor is a regular man made into a magic user whose religious imagery was not what it appeared to be. Mel and Viktor are both magic users confined to a chamber meant to hold "false prophets."

[ilikedetectives]

"What can I say? You're stuck with me."

[cringefailvox]

i am so interested in vox's very pointed use of the word "coward" to describe alastor in stayed gone. because alastor really isn't a coward, as much as we've seen. he publicly bites back at vox, he parries easily with zestial despite his visible discomfort, he openly challenges the king of hell and nearly dies fending off the leader of the exorcist army. he's definitely not someone who runs from fights unless he absolutely has to, even when he's outmatched—he frequently and recklessly picks them, actually! and i would rather call his escape in the finale a tactical retreat than anything else, because he would've been killed if he stayed. so what gives?

i think it has to do with why val seems to think alastor owes him and vox something "much more than money." val says he almost beat vox last time—"almost" implies he lost, but vox doesn't behave as though he won any great victory over alastor; instead he seems to feel cheated or slighted, like the fight still didn't end in his favor even though alastor didn't or couldn't beat him. "coward" implies that alastor retreated, which we know he only does when he really has to, but WHY would he retreat from a fight with vox? what HAPPENED?

but more to the point, it's really fascinating, isn't it, for vox to frame alastor's behavior as cowardly rather than what makes him so scary. because in one light, making overlords disappear, leaving opponents dissatisfied because he chooses to retreat rather than die for his pride, burning out security cameras, etc reads as the terrifying actions of a man who's unpredictable, intelligent, and way too powerful for his own good. his credibility as an overlord comes from his initial rise to power, most of which happened in the shadows or in total anonymity. he's the monster under the bed. but vox turns all of that on its head: no, he slinks around in the dark because he's scared. he runs away from fights, he hides his face, he doesn't let anyone see him for what he is because what he is isn't anything.

and most intriguing of all, vox seems to think this is really disappointing! he's furious at the mention of alastor not finishing their last fight; he yells at the screen like a soccer dad watching alastor run from adam. it's like he seems to want alastor to try harder, to be as big and showy and powerful as vox must know he is, because vox can't fathom why someone as intimidating as alastor wouldn't capitalize on it in every conceivable way. almost like—and here i get a little radiostatic wish-fulfillment-y—he's noticing the same thing that drove alastor to a musical breakdown at the end of s1, that alastor simply isn't at full capacity anymore. that he's limited in some way. but vox doesn't know alastor is trapped by a deal; all he sees is alastor acting like a coward who won't finish the fights he picks, who has insulted vox (and val) by not giving their rivalry his all like vox seems to expect him to, like it used to be the status quo. things have changed a lot since he left town indeed. curiouser and curiouser

[bnjmin]

he actually doesn't have the heart to tell danny that the smell of the eggs is both delicious and also too eggy - it sticks in the back of his throat with every inhale. danny's laughed about him and the sounds his stomach can make when he's presented with food, sometimes, but right now there's nothing. no hunger cue, no pavlovian response. just him trying not to gag at the sight of food.

"not hungry. i ate earlier." this is one of those things he hates about this version of him, too. how easily the lies slide into his sentences. like someone else tossed them into the middle of it as he was speaking. he leans his hip against the counter; a white flag, a semi-acquiescence. "i'll drink, like, an orange juice if it'll make you feel better."

“you’re  gonna  sit,”  his  words  are  a  firm,  unmistakable  command  -  for  once,  there’s  no  shift  in  the  dryness  of  danny’s  demeanor  that  lends  itself  to  even  a  shred  of  amusement,  “and  you’re  gonna  eat.”  the  way  that  danny  is  looking  at  ben  says  even  more:  look  at  you  -  i  don’t  know  the  last  time  you  had  a  full  fucking  meal.

he  stands  stoic  beside  the  still-warm  stove  -  he  slides  a  plate  of  scrambled  eggs  in  front  of  ben,  intentionally  withholding  the  fork  until  the  other  man  complies  and  sits  on  the  stool  across  from  him.  danny’s  jaw  sets  on  edge  as  his  eyes  flick  from  ben  to  the  seat,  no  less  enlightened  by  the  tension  shared  between  them  -  he  doesn’t  like  this  any  more  than  ben  does.

STARTER    CALL,    still    accepting    /    @bnjmin    🤍

[everysongineverykey]

anyway all in all i agree that the mystery valentine doesn't quite read like gaster and might not actually be gaster but it's definitely meant to invoke gaster. like toby knew exactly what he was doing with "YES, IT'S QUITE IRONIC, BUT I SEEM TO HAVE FORGOTTEN" what with gaster having been forgotten by everyone and all (although that could just be a reference to don't forget, but i doubt it). and "GOOD BY!" and shit. it all gives gaster. and that's why i firmly believe that if it's not gaster, it's someone connected to him- the next secret boss, probably.

though i do also love the theory that it's a piece of gaster, a small piece of him containing most of his compassion and friendliness, but not many of his other faculties, and the gaster we've been talking to so far is the "main" piece, the biggest piece, containing awareness and memory and some metaphysical ability but less of his former personality and dreams. i think that would square nicely with "WAS IT MYSELF? NO... WELL, PERHAPS" and i think it would be fun and funky if we could put him back together💙

[marshimiiuowo]

So uh.....

I'm pretty sure everyone KNOWS that one specific image of Stan floating around lately (mostly on Tiktok).

The real question is....

Did Tad seen it?-

I need answers @void-dude because I'm at the bars of my enclosure-

[strawberrysnscreams]

I'm shaking 😫

Edit: After someone having a go at me in the comments about not linking the artists, yes I will link them, no need to get mad bro. Also everything other than the fan art is mine :)

Middle: @suketchi-s

Bottom Left: @hansoeii

Top Left: @yuis-art

[pippalovestunabrick]

NUREYEV:(IN LOVE)Juno. JUNO:(RELIEVED AND IN LOVE)There he is. NUREYEV:I love you. I'm sorry. I'm so, so-- JUNO:Get over here. (KISSING SOUNDS MY BELOVED)

[mochimichael]

STANLEY PINES WITH A SLIGHTLY YOUNGER BF AISGSJJDB

He bites his lip, a bit nervous about bottoming for the first time. He doesn't wanna seem soft in his old age. But when you're so gentle with him, preping him so he can take you real good, he just melts. With your soft encouragement and praise, he stops holding back moans and whimpers. The way his callused hands tighten around the bedsheets when you first push in, the way he clenches around you. He cums so fast and is so embarrassed, poor baby. He mumbles something about his old age, but the real reason is that you just fill him up so good, he just can't help it.

[thedeadedhooman]

who did jared's hair in season 15 please report to the principal's office.

This is jared in the spn finale (not that he looks bad but the looks could be more flattering)

This is jared in walker/post spn

I'm eating glass

[dilfmobius]

Lokius moments that altered my brain chemistry [2/?] ↳ "Give him more time. He can still make it."