#i'm even going to break my tagging rule which I HAVE NEVER EVER BROKEN BEFORE because i can't bear to call you sixteen
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I may be your worst nightmare
-@the-fakest-stria-sixteen
YOU SPELT MY FAVORITE NUMBER WRONG? BLOCKED
#this is an offense i cannot tolerate. get out. this is irredeemable#you deserve no title of sixteen. i demand you leave immediately#asks#anon#i'm even going to break my tagging rule which I HAVE NEVER EVER BROKEN BEFORE because i can't bear to call you sixteen#you deserve no sixteen title. only shame and isolation. good bye. i hope you have a terrible day#not cawtulk#fandom shenanigans#keepblr#kotlc fandom#the-fakest-stria-sixteen#<- you've earned it back but you're on thin ice . . .#stria sixteen multiverse
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Rules
I am on mobile, so my tags are very minimal.
Do not reblog threads you are not apart of. This also applies to my headcanons, but I'm confident that the only people who reblog those are ppl who find it and don't realize this is an RP blog.
I'm lenient about this, but do not reblog art or memes from here, as it clogs up my feed.
Don't poop on the floor
I am oc friendly. However, if you don't have a rules or about for your blog, I'm probably not going to interact.
You never know what you're going to get with me. You may get a multipara starter/reply, you may get a few sentences. I don't expect you to match my length, especially if I've written a behemoth of a starter... but I do ask that you try to match my effort. If I'm writing a huge reply and you respond with something that doesn't match the setting or context, (and do this consistently,) I'm more than likely doing to drop threads, and if this keeps happening, I'll just soft block you. Yes I do this for fun, but I put abouts and rules and everything you need to know for a reason, and if you can't be bothered to put in the effort to read it, or properly read my responses, then don't even bother. This sounds mean, but this is incredibly frustrating and a bit insulting and that's not what I want for a hobby.
Don't always try to fix a conflict immediately? Especially if this is a common theme of the blog. Bonnie is broken and he is not being repaired. The techs who say that pieces have been ordered and are en route are lying to him. Do not take this away, or the thread will be dropped. There is a huge difference between talking to those techs and confronting them about it and saying "Oh your parts came in five-ever ago lets go get you fixed!" Comfort him, reassure him, validate him, find temporary solutions for him: but don't fix him. I like tension sometimes, so don't take away a threat or conflict within the first three replies if you can help it! There is a story here that I am trying to tell, but if you take away the main conflict, it doesn't work.
Due to a lack of interest across my FNaF blogs, asks and threads are now put into my queue and will take a few days to get to it. Every morning I put ten posts into my queue, except on Fridays, where I do thirty. If you reply to me on Saturday, it may not post a response until Monday or Wednesday, depending on on which blog it's on. I'm no longer giving threads a priority in my queue, they just get put in.
I am a mobile user. My brother did give me his laptop, but at the end of my work day, I'm usually out of spoons to write unless a thread has me in a choke hold. Maybe once in a while, I'll pop onto my laptop to fine-tune posts like this, but it's hard, if not impossible for me to use the site to its full extent on the normal. As such, icons will not be used and trimming posts will not be done the way I like.
Trimming posts are a strange area. I have adhd and autism, so the best way for a thread to be trimmed is with the last response still attached. This way I can remember what's going on in the thread, which will lead to an overall better rp experience. If posts don't get trimmed, I'll just have to make the reply and hit that big red X button that deletes everything before my response, so take that as a warning.
RESPECT MY FUCKING BOUNDARIES. I've had some issues with one individual who sucked me into this Fandom, they refused to take no for an answer, and forced me to rp an incest ship. This has scared me away from the rpc for years. If I say no, it does not mean "convince me," it means no. I have a three strikes your out policy.
Due to this experience, I'm in a very weird place with ships, I currently don't ship Bonnie and I go back and forth as to whether or not I will in the future. You are free to talk about ships with me, but you must must MUST communicate with me!! Even if we have a ship, please communicate with me if you want to change something or break them up, please don't just end it without warning or talking to me first. I'll never force you to ship a ship you don't want, but if you don't warn me first, I will think that you want Bonnie to try and save I do not automatically have fronnie as a canon ship. I do not automatically ship them- but I do, personally believe they are Canon, just not here. They are best friends. Is there room for something more? TALK TO ME and find out. It depends on the chemistry between our characters. This is true for ALL ships, but it applies the strictest to Fronnie. I am a shipping whore, I really am, and as long as it's with another animatronic, (and that animatronic isn't supposed to be or looks like a child,) I will most likely be open to it!
I have a full-time job as a daycare teacher. I am not always online. Do not pester me for replies.
I like to talk in the DMs!! Please don't think that this is a passive aggressive attempt to get you to reply, as eager as I get, this is a hobby, and I will not rush you intentionally!! Please tell me politely if I make you feel rushed or don't want to talk via dms. (I personally just think that writing is more fun when you know your partners.) That being said, I do not want you feeling like you are responsible for my personal feelings, and vice versa. You are allowed to say no, I am allowed to say no. If you try and guilt trip me, that will count against your three strikes. (And I will warn you dw.)
In addition to this, if you do NOT like communicating via dms, please tell me, and I will stop. If you just ignore me or ghost me, I'm either going to continue to try and reach out, thinking you forgot or didn't get notified, or I'll become intimidated, and think I did something wrong. We're all adults here, we can use our words. You don't have to follow me if you don't want to interact.
I have kept up with the lore moderately well, but if I don't know something, or have forgotten something, do not bully me. I have zero tolerance for it. You respect me, and I respect you.
From now on, this blog is run from a separate blog as well as this one in an attempt to distance myself from my toxic ex-friend. Since tumblr thinks this blog is now run from two separate blogs, DMs will not be able to be used from here any more, therefore, all DMs will have to be sent to @twoiesfnafocs. If there is some sort of emergency, and you need to contact me quickly for any reason, you will have to send an ask, even just sending in "hey can you log in, I need to talk to you asap," I will.
If you want to let me know you've read these, go ahead and like it, but it's not required, I use an honor system anyway.
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I had a great and much needed escape from the madness of life today to go to the river and rock hunted and even saw a sea lion in the river, which I have never seen in a river, only the ocean before so, that was exciting. I haven't been able to get a break from obligations in months. I don't remember how long.I am privileged to have distractions from what is at stake and a cellphone to tell you about it. We can't afford the genocide and the ecocide that goes along with it.
I am hardly ever am on here anymore, and when I have been, it has been mostly for horny lesbian lurking, to be honest. I hate the phrase "to be honest" because it implies being dishonest before. I kind of feel like I have and am being dishonest and selfish, I guess.
Being chronically ill/disabled, transgender, queer, autistic and white american. I feel limited in what I can do as well as feel obligated to take action. I think we should all be taking action. I am educating myself, listening, signing petitions, reposting news to my Instagram story, and smiling at people in public to try to make them feel safe.
I haven't posted on Instagram since November. I just don't know what to say anywhere. At least here I don't have to show my face or too much identifiable information to be able to rant. Sometimes, I worry that people in public see me as a neo nazi skin head because of my buzz cut looking hair, being a white person, and love of punk. I can barely walk much anymore, can't make phone calls unless it's to my partner or people in my close circle, I don't have any money because ebt is not enough to be life sustaining. I usually run out half way through the month due to inflation, cost of necessary itams, and I could go on but won't. Social Security Administration sees me as unfit to manage my own finances and my rep payee who receives my Social Security Income only pays my bills if I'm lucky and doesn't communicate with me to help me budget or even give me any of "my own" money so I can't donate. I can't afford to buy food for myself.
Seeing the news gets me so scared and full of rage. I am full of rage that the US government doesn't care for it's own people and even pushes further to destroy it's own people and the people of the world in need who are suffering because of us. I wish there were more news sources covering what is happening in Sudan and Congo. I hope there is not another Kent State incident but at Columbia. News coverage of Columbia and tik tok and whatever else is distraction from the real issues across the world. It should be getting covered, but how do we balance out distractions from news and news from other news? It feels so strange coming on here to look at frivolous, fantasy, sexy posts when the world is a shit. How do I even transition to talking about something else?
This doesn't feel right. Being human is confusing and feels impossible. We need communication to help us function together, but I am not sure how to communicate well. All the rules seem unspoken, spoken but different for each situation, person, or group, or just ignored entirely until the rules are broken and we must be punishment or served judgment in some way. This doesn't feel right.
Am not sure what to tag this under, if anything. I removed the original tags because I don't want to clog up feed with this.
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Speaking as a user of AO3 since launch year: this is not true and I'm concerned to see this take going around tbh, given the high likelihood this sort of approach will get authors yelled at for no good reason over some vague sense they've broken an unspoken "rule" that just isn't a thing. It may be accepted etiquette in some fannish communities to tag certain things, which OK, navigate that in the fannish spaces you're in, but this is not a "truth" about AO3, for the simple reason that AO3 has a specific rule that the only things anyone "needs" to tag are... the major content warnings. It's explicit in the site's rules and why those tags are separated from the rest.
First off, the only tags you are ever obligated to include on AO3 are the compulsory warnings, period. Refusing to tag things commonly seen as triggering may be considered bad etiquette in some fan communities, and most fandoms have cultural norms (which vary!) around what it's "usual" to tag, but the fact of the matter is that if it isn't a compulsory warning you don't have to tag it and if a fic does not specifically say something will or won't be in it, you should not assume as a reader. I would never think myself obligated to tag a fic "angst" as long as I didn't tag it "fluff", and if a reader complained I had not "warned" them about something that inane, I would delete their comment and move on with my day. You will find angsty fics that are not tagged "angst" and that is not some kind of mistake. Just to give a "neutral" example (based on personal experience).
Similarly, the practice of warning in summaries rather than tags is as old as AO3 and fine, hence why "content warnings in author's note" is a common tag. It's usually considered best practice to tag this (so folks remember to check) and this has certainly shifted a little since the (new! it's a new feature!) ability to search via exclusion was introduced on the site. But folks are not obligated to tag everything that could hypothetically be someone's trigger. Again, good etiquette around letting people exclude things they hate or find annoying is IMO a different discussion! I recommend tagging things people in your spaces are likely to want to ignore!
But the trigger warnings thing... if a fic author does not promise you something isn't in the fic and it's not a major content warning, you should not be assuming it isn't there as a reader. If my fic doesn't explicitly promise you it's fluffy happy funtimes, you should not complain when it turns out to be angst. That is not a reasonable expectation, and the idea it's the basic standard to know everything about a piece of fiction before going into it is. Weird! That's a weird idea. (Books do not usually do this. Original short fiction does not usually do this.) Fic authors who don't want to tell you if their fic has a sad twist in it or not are not "breaking the rules" unless they lie to you and claim it's a super duper happy fic, pinky swear. If you are so sensitive to the idea fic might have a thing in it you can't even stand to get to the authors' note that warns you ahead of time, that is your thing to manage and not authors', tbh.
PSA to new AO3 users:
TRIGGER WARNINGS GO IN THE "ADDITIONAL TAGS" SECTION.
I've seen several fics now that have trigger warnings in the author's notes or description but not in the tags. And you're on the right track! It's good to recognize what might trigger someone, and it's good to warn for it! But they NEED to be in the tags.
The tags are for anything people should be aware of before reading, and triggers are on the top of the list. Ao3's Exclude feature doesn't catch things from the author's notes, so if someone has filtered out a thing, they'll be in for a nasty suprise when they click open your fic that was tagged Angst but not the specific thing they thought they were safe from.
It's cool if you didn't know this! Nobody is born knowing all the rules and conventions. That's why I'm saying it. And I'm not saying warnings can't be in the notes or description. They can! But they should be IN ADDITION to the tags. People need to know what they're in for BEFORE they open the fic, and they need to able to exclude it from search results completely.
And spell the warnings properly. No euphemisms ala sewer slide, no replacing letters with numbers or symbols, no slashes cutting words in half. The content you're describing is allowed on the archive so there's no need to try to "pass under the radar". You WANT filters to catch those words because that's how people can control what they see and what they don't. Censoring words on ao3 hurts people, and doesn't help anyone.
#ao3 drew a line in the sand about this at launch and it has not budged since!#personally i'd like a few more compulsory warnings than there are! but at the end of the day. the rules are p. clear#and sorry but if you think authors are obligated to warn every non-HEA fic... lol. no. that's not even a common *norm* let alone a 'rule'.#the tags are for searching btw. not primarily for warning. they are primarily for filtering BY. again: exclusion is *new*#old fics especially are not tagged to *exclude* things.
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Seeing Red | bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader (part 4)
(part 1) (part 2) (part 3)
series summary: bucky used to brag that he didn’t have a celebrity crush, or really care about famous people at all, which is what made him the perfect person to start working for a celebrity like yourself. except, of course, it’s just his luck that he’d fall for you.
word count: 5.3k
warnings: smut!!, overstimulation, oral f receiving, lots of dirty talk and begging, very very subtle d/s dynamics if you squint, slight angst??, awkwardness, pining
Bucky’s heart was racing as he tried to prepare himself for what was coming. It was never easy to watch that scene of you being fucked by somebody else— even if it wasn’t real, and even if it was technically your character that was getting fucked— but it was going to be an entirely new struggle with you a foot away, laying next to him on your bed.
“We only did two takes of this,” you remembered, talking over the conversation on-screen. The smash cut to you being shoved against a wall, lips fighting for dominance in a searing kiss, made you chuckle. “This we had to do, like, a million takes.”
Bucky’s hand tightened into a fist at the idea of you kissing this guy over and over. “I’m sure he was real broken up about that,” he grumbled sardonically.
“No, I promise he actually was,” you defended, “I was terrible. I kept laughing and ruining it, and it meant we had to keep starting over.”
That relieved some of his jealousy, hopeful that laughing meant you weren’t attracted to your co-star or turned on by filming a love scene. He still felt his heart clench as he watched your shirt get pushed up and two hands (both flesh, like he was showing off or something) grab at your breasts. Sooner than he was prepared for it, you were being thrown down onto the bed and moaning loudly, nails digging into his back as he stared down at you.
“I can’t even imagine how many guys have gotten off to this scene,” you shuddered.
I can’t believe I’m one of them, Bucky thought as he swallowed dryly. “What about the guys on set?” he wondered aloud. “Do they ever, you know, get…” he whistled and pointed his finger up straight, hoping it was enough to get the idea across.
You laughed, playfully shoving him on the shoulder. “They have tape for that, to keep everything down in case they get a little too into it.”
Glancing to the screen, he wondered how this guy didn’t pop the tape right off.
“Have you ever…?” Bucky pressed, heart rate picking up as he pushed the boundaries a little bit.
“Have I ever… been turned on, while filming?” you finished his question. “No,” you scoffed, sounding bemused and taking another swig of your drink.
“Why not?”
“I guess they’re just not my type,” you shrugged.
“Movie stars aren’t your type?” Bucky joked, but your answer was completely serious.
“Nope.”
He nodded slowly as he contemplated that, taking a moment to build up the courage to ask his next question. “What is your type?”
You smirked a little, and he wasn’t sure at all what it meant aside from the fact that he was done for. Whatever you were gonna say was sure to break his heart. “Tall, dark, not famous…”
He could so picture you picking up fans at bars; you must have no trouble at all finding guys to mess around with. Yep, totally heartbreaking.
“Good driver…” you continued, voice a little quieter and a little deeper.
Bucky cleared his throat anxiously. “I guess that rules me out.”
“What? You’re great; haven’t even blown any red lights or made illegal U-turns.”
“I mean, good drivers don’t eavesdrop on their passengers,” he explained, “especially when they’re with tall, dark, not-famous friends of theirs in the back.”
You laughed a little, half-lidded eyes looking him up and down. He felt very exposed under your gaze. “I didn’t mind,” you shrugged.
Oh god, oh fuck, Bucky’s mind raced, we’re talking about it. All this time and we’re finally talking about it. What the fuck do I say? “I still shouldn’t have—” he began.
“I wanted you to,” you interrupted firmly.
“You… wanted me to look?”
“Wanted you to do a lot more than that,” you admitted.
He looked back at you with wide eyes, entirely devoid of thoughts or words or ideas on what to do in the moment. Sure, it was pretty heavy flirting, but it wasn’t necessarily an invitation. You said wanted, past tense, it didn’t mean you wanted him now. Maybe you were just letting him know he missed his chance. If he did the wrong thing and upset you, he’d never forgive himself.
“Seemed like you were pretty satisfied with what he was doing,” he remembered, hearing the waver in his voice and cringing.
“Only cause I was thinking about you,” you grinned. “I do that a lot, actually. I’m just usually alone when I do it…”
He shivered as you shifted onto your side and leaned towards him, reaching across his body to set your beer down on the bedside table next to him; with you so close, he feared his heart would beat out of his chest. With the beer set aside, all you had to do was let your hand pull back to rest on his chest, and lift your leg up to rest on his, and you were straddling his side like it was the most simple, casual thing in the world.
But it wasn’t. It was the most insane thing that had ever happened to him. He looked down at you and blinked a few times, confident the hallucation would end but nope, he could feel the warmth of you radiating through his clothes, threatening to burn him alive.
“I’m usually in this bed, right here,” you continued slowly, and he had trouble keeping track of what you were saying with your finger trailing along his chest through his shirt, “warm under the covers, wearing a lot less than this, knowing you’re just a few rooms away and wishing you would come in here and touch me…”
"I’m here now,” he replied, just louder than a whisper. “Can I touch you?"
“Take off the gloves,” you requested softly. He was quick with the right one, but hesitated before removing the left— the moment of truth. Your breath hitched as the light caught the golden and black metal, and he winced.
“That bad?”
“No, no,” you denied, “it’s… sort of beautiful, actually.”
With you wrapped around his left side, it was natural for his right hand to move up your thigh. His left hand brushing against your face seemed to surprise you, though.
"I'm sorry, is it cold?" he asked gently.
"A little," you giggled, "but I don't mind."
Demonstrating how little you minded, in fact, you slowly kissed the tips of his bionic fingers, getting more and more adventurous until you were suddenly slipping two of them into your mouth and down past your throat.
"Fuck," he shivered, silently thanking whatever gods were out there that technology made him capable of feeling the wet warmth of your mouth on his fingers.
"Just skin everywhere else, right?" you smirked. "It's not a Swiss army knife down there?"
"Nope," he laughed, "flesh an' blood."
The blood aspect was especially salient as his cock filled so fast he thought he might pass out. Your hand slipped down and started to ghost over the front of his jeans, and he fought every instinct to keep from bucking up into your hand. You started to go for his belt but he sat up a bit.
“Wait,” he requested, clutching your shoulders a little; as soon as you looked back at him, he pulled you into a kiss, probably a little too aggressively but he was too pent up to care. After all this waiting, he actually had to hold himself back a bit compared to how he really wanted to kiss you. He moved his lips against yours slowly but with determination— and it was you, in the end, that started to slide your tongue along his lips until he opened them, giving him a chance to taste your mouth like he’d dreamed of for so long. Past the beer was the unmistakable flavor of you, and he was instantly addicted to it. His arms wrapped around you and held you close, one hand tangling in your hair a bit as you started to lean into his palm. Your hands clutched at his shirt, the warmth of your touch managing to permeate through to his skin, and he heard the softest moan from you right against his lips. It was perfection, and he would’ve been happy to stay like that forever if it weren’t for you sitting up to straddle him. He couldn’t decide if it was the sight of you on top of him, or the weight of your body on his, or the feeling of your thighs clenching a bit just above his throbbing cock— it was probably all three, but he suddenly became so needy for you that his head was spinning.
Still absorbed in the kiss, he reached down and gently pulled at the knot holding your robe shut, letting it fall open before pushing it off your shoulders slowly. You smiled against his lips and sat up, taking it off the rest of the way to reveal your entire nudity underneath. You’d think that he would’ve wished to be naked with you, and that certainly would’ve made a few of his ideas a lot easier to act upon, but something about your bare body compared to his covered one— something about your mound grinding on his jeans like that— drove him fucking wild.
“God, baby,” he praised with a purr, running his hands all over whatever he could reach. A movie could never do a body like this justice. It deserved to be appreciated and worshipped in person, which was exactly what he planned to do.
“Your turn,” you giggled as you leaned down, unbuttoning his shirt hastily. He was proud of the way you bit down on your lip as his skin was exposed, though he was also a bit embarrassed to reveal he was wearing his dog tags underneath. “A little more metal under here than I was expecting,” you smirked, trailing an errant finger over the silver chain. “There’s always more to you than meets the eye… what other secrets are you hiding, hm?”
Right now, he wanted you to have all his secrets. He wanted to give you everything. “I’ve wanted this for so long,” he admitted first.
“I don’t think that’s that much of a secret,” you smirked as you finished the last button.
He sat up to help you discard the shirt, shivering as your touch trailed over his chest, his abs; then his scars, and the rest of the arm. He used it to pull you down by your neck for another kiss, testing the waters by getting a touch rougher and letting more of his desperation seep through. You responded very well, your moans gliding from your tongue onto his as your hips started to rock on top of his. “Needy little thing, aren’t ya?” he gently mocked, smiling as he started to kiss down your neck and onto your shoulder. “Ridin’ me through my jeans, like a damn teenager dry-humping after prom.”
“Hnng, Bucky,” you choked, slowing down.
He grabbed your hips with both hands. “Hey, I didn’t say to stop.”
With a moan and renewed vigor, you moved faster on top of him, the rough denim clearly a bit too much for your sensitive clit as your thighs began to quiver where they were clamped down around his. The stimulation on his cock, alternatively, was rather dulled through such thick clothing— it was just enough to keep him desperate, but not enough to get him too near coming, which was the way he wanted it at the moment. If anything, it was the sight of you rubbing yourself on him desperately that put his restraint at risk.
“Can you feel how hard I am, baby?” he growled a little. “Can you feel how hard you make me?”
You nodded with a little gasp. "God, Bucky, I want it in me now."
"Not yet, pretty girl,” he soothed with a smirk. “I need to taste you first."
He flipped you onto your back and settled on top of you between your legs; he kissed you one more time, resisting the urge to rub his hips on yours again before heading down south to suck your nipple between his lips. You were so sensitive, moaning loudly each time his tongue circled the bud, and he moaned at the feeling of the skin hardening against his tongue. He made sure to give some attention to the other one before making a show of kissing down your chest and stomach, looking back up at you with a stare that he could only hope carried all the weight that he was feeling.
"I get it," you grinned down at him, "this is how you reclaim your territory. You're gonna do what he did to me, but so much better until I can't even remember his name, right?"
"Sweetheart, you didn't even remember his name thirty seconds after it happened,” he reminded you between kisses, moving lower and lower on the bed.
"So you're not trying to assert dominance over sexual competition?" you pressed with a gleam of challenge in your eyes.
"You need to stop reading those evolutionary biology books," he laughed, but then got a bit more stern. "Think of it this way: I don't see any of those stupid boys as competition. They're nothing. It's you who needs to know that nobody can make you feel as good as I can."
That seemed to shut you up for the moment, and he smirked before getting back to work kissing along your spread thighs and shaking hips. He could already smell your need in the air, intoxicating to the point that he struggled to stay focused on mercilessly teasing you. He wanted to taste you so bad, but he needed to hear you beg him for it. He started with one finger gently exploring your folds, slow and light, until he felt your hips trying to push up into him for more stimulation. Then all he had to do was kiss that spot right on the inside of your thigh that wasn’t quite where you wanted him, and you arched your back with a desperate whine. “Bucky, please,” you whimpered.
He laughed a little, amused by your little sobs and the way your hands clutched at the comforter beneath you. “Tell me what you need, sweetheart.”
“Your mouth,” you gasped.
“Where do you want it?” he asked innocently.
You snarled with irritation but answered anyway. “My pussy.”
“I don’t think I understand,” he encouraged, voice getting deeper on accident as his own arousal became too intense to ignore.
You growled frustratedly but got what he was getting at. “I need your mouth on my pussy, Bucky, please…”
“Well, why didn’t you say so, darlin’? All you had to do was ask,” he grinned as he roughly grabbed your thighs and buried his face in between them, sloppily exploring you with his tongue until your taste coated his mouth and overwhelmed all his senses.
“Fuck!” you yelped, shivering against him. “Oh god, yes, Bucky, oh my god…”
“Is this what you wanted, pretty girl?” he asked, pulling back just as much as he needed to to speak.
“Yes, Bucky, just like that,” you nodded wildly, “feels so good, don’t fucking stop, please—”
He dove in again, finding a pattern that allowed him to suck on your clit and push his tongue inside you simultaneously. That was the combination that seemed to rile you up most, your hands searching for something to hold on to until they suddenly found purchase gripping his hair, guiding him as your hips bucked against his face. That was fine with him— more than that, in fact, cause he thought it was so sexy when you demanded control like that— until you switched from pulling him in to pushing him away. That wouldn’t do at all; with a growl, he grabbed your wrists and forced them down beside you, holding them firm as he licked at you rougher and faster.
“Fuck, Bucky,” you sobbed, back arching so much that he had to fight to keep you in his mouth, “right there, right there— oh fuck, I’m gonna come.”
He nodded, but it wasn’t permission; it was ‘of course you are.’
Your walls clenched so hard that your entire sex was pulsing in his mouth, your taste getting stronger in the same way your moans got louder. He wanted to hold you there as long as you could, and that turned out to be quite a while; he stopped when your screams of pleasure started to push too far into pain, finally letting you rest… for a moment, that is.
He watched your panting breaths catch as he slowly pushed a finger into your hole; it was still pulsing a little bit from the orgasm, and was unbearably hot and wet.
"Fuck, this pretty little pussy is tryin' to suck me in, you see that? Wants me so bad…"
"M-more, Bucky, please," you whispered. He obeyed and slipped in a second finger, slowly twisting and trying to open you up for him.
"You like that, pretty girl?" he asked with a smile as he watched your back arch, returning to suck on your clit without waiting for an answer. He relished the weight of your thighs on his shoulders, taking mental note of where he had to touch you to make them clench around his head. You kept repeating 'yes' but he didn't think it was intended as an answer to his question because he was pretty sure you hadn't even heard the question. Still, it was answer enough nonetheless.
He could tell it wouldn't take that long to get you there again, with your g-spot all swollen from the last one. He didn't push too hard on it yet, just letting his fingers curl ever so slightly to apply a teasing amount of pressure.
"Don't you wanna fuck me?" you moaned between sobs.
His cock seemed to process that question before his brain did. "Yes," he answered quickly, even though he thought it was rude to talk with his mouth full.
"Then get on with it," you suggested desperately. "Come on up here and fuck me."
"I'm not done with this yet," he insisted.
Your head fell back as you hissed frustratedly through your teeth. "Damn you and your… thoroughness."
"No point in doing anything if you're not gonna do it right," he laughed. "Besides, I couldn't stop now when you're about to come."
You looked back at him for a second like you didn't agree with that assessment, until he curled his fingers again and your walls rippled erratically around him. "Fuck," you shuddered. “Please fuck me, please fuck me, please,” you sobbed, “I need it so bad, I need you inside me— Bucky, pleasepleaseplease—”
He growled against your skin, struggling to resist that but desperate to make you come just one more time before he gave in. His cock really hated that he wasn’t giving you what you wanted, throbbing and weeping another drop of precum just to remind him of his own desperation. But he stayed strong, focusing on his task as he felt your walls tighten around him with another orgasm.
You nearly screamed with this one, your voice breaking as your nails dug into the bed beneath you. You looked fucking perfect with your head thrown back in pleasure like that— and you tasted even better as a gush of your arousal coated his tongue.
He kept circling your bud with his tongue until you started to sob a little and try to push him off of you, “can’t take anymore, please—”
And he took pity on you, for once— or maybe it was moreso pity on himself as he sat up and palmed himself through his jeans. He was so hard it hurt, and you looked like you could tell by the way you looked up at him: a glimmer of mischief in your eyes, still, even with the way they’d glazed over a bit from coming so hard. “Get over here,” you purred as you sat up and pulled him down on top of you, kissing him again as your hands slipped down to clutch at his chest.
Of everything he’d imagined, he had never even thought to consider what it would be like to be undressed by you. Those nimble fingers fiddling with his belt, working open his fly and zipper with such unabashed desperation, like you needed him more than you’d ever needed anything… truly, it was intoxicating.
Then again, it was nothing compared to your hand slipping into his boxers and wrapping around his cock. He was sure he’d never gotten so much out of just one touch before, and he had to fight off the moan bubbling in his throat. Your hands were so soft as they started to gently stroke him; his hips moved of their own accord as they started to thrust into your grasp.
“God, I need you to fuck me,” you groaned, “please, Bucky, need it so bad.”
Entirely speechless as this point, all he could do was nod as he pushed your hands off of him, pushing his jeans off quickly so as to be away from you as briefly as he could manage— and then he was on you again, kissing you everywhere he could reach, moaning when he finally let his cock brush between your legs for a moment. Even just that and he was already coated in your slick: the rewards of demanding to be thorough, clearly.
“Please,” you sobbed, “put it in me, can’t wait any more, I’ve waited so long…”
It almost made him stop to think, because it was ambiguous if you just meant tonight or more. But you were begging him for his cock so he wasn’t really in any position to think.
So many times he had wondered if your real moans sounded anything like your fake ones from the movie. He fantasized for months about a chance to make the comparison. But with you in front of him, under him, biting down on your lip as he pushed into your perfect warmth, he couldn’t even remember that you’d ever been in a movie. He couldn’t think about anything else but this moment, right now, and he didn’t want to.
“God, Bucky,” you sighed, as if the two were being regarded at the same level in your mind— and he wasn't even halfway in yet.
Equal parts of him wanted to ease you into it and to tear you in half. You'd always ignited this paradox in him, this instinct to protect and to destroy, this desire to cherish you and dominate you, but it was most apparent now. It made him worry that he could never really give you what you deserved, but naturally, he was at his most selfish in this moment. He had only just begun to push himself into you and he was ready to justify anything to get the rest of the way and bury himself to the hilt.
Your body opened up to him slightly, enough that he felt mostly right about going a little deeper; you gasped and clutched at his forearm, and that was only just barely enough to stop him as a sick pressure of arousal made his gut twist. Oddly enough, your nails biting into his skin did more to egg him on than it did to slow him down.
He kept his eyes trained on where your bodies were joined, watching in awe at the way you looked stretched out around him; he could feel your struggle to take him in the way your walls quivered and quaked, but he could hear how much you enjoyed it as you moaned and gasped beneath him.
"I want it all, Bucky, please," you begged. Just because he needed to, he was rough with the last inch— not enough for it to be really brutal, but plenty to elicit a precious little sob from you.
It felt so good to be all the way in you that it nearly made him dizzy.
"Baby," you whispered, and it sounded just like the way you'd said it in the back of the car, just like the way he'd committed to memory and stowed away in his mind to visit whenever he needed to feed his addiction.
How could his chest not burn with jealousy when he remembered that night? How could he cope with that jealousy with anything but pinning you down and fucking you hard and fast like it was the end of the goddamn world?
You all but screamed as he did it, your whole body shaking as he pounded into you. He feared it would be more than you could handle but you went from wet to dripping in an instant, your moans loud and hoarse but undeniably a sound of pleasure. It turned him on even more to know that you liked getting fucked this hard; maybe he didn't need to worry so much about holding back, if this was gonna make you bite your lip and look up at him like that.
"Bucky, oh my god," you sighed, a hint of disbelief in your tone, "it's so good, fuck, you feel so good…"
He wanted to hear more, but he couldn't resist capturing your lips in a kiss first, sloppy and aggressive and needy but overall perfect. It was almost like he could taste your moans as they vibrated over his tongue, until he could barely tell his apart from yours anymore. Pulling back, his dog tags were dangling over your face, and you looked so damn good with his name tickling your skin.
When he lifted your legs and pushed them back up into your chest, you snarled and clutched at the sheets beneath you. "Too deep?" he asked, not sure himself if it was concern or taunting or somewhere in the middle.
"So fucking deep," you answered, "but not too deep."
"Then maybe I'm not deep enough," he smirked, and you laughed.
"You're trying to ruin me, is that it?" you pressed.
He was afraid to be entirely honest, but your tone wasn't one of fear. "Something like that," he admitted after a moment.
"It's working," you sighed as you pulled him down by the chain of his tags, kissing him again as your arms slipped around his neck and held him close.
His hands squeezed your thighs, before taking a detour to run up and down your legs. It made you shiver, and he felt it from inside you which was overwhelmingly erotic. The time he’d spent making you come so many times was paying off: for one, you were so wet it made him feel a little-lightheaded, but also it meant that he felt familiar with your body now. He knew what it meant when your walls tightened just so, when you bit your lip that way, when your moans sounded all breathy and strained. That being, of course, that you were about to come— and he couldn’t wait for you to come just from being fucked, make a mess all over his cock.
And yet, there was still so much more to discover: like how it felt when your legs wrapped around his hips to keep him inside, or when your fingers dug into his shoulders as you looked up at him.
“Gonna come,” you warned him with half-lidded eyes and your mouth fallen slack, “oh my god, Bucky, you’re gonna make me come.”
He growled and tightened his grip on your thigh— something to stabilize him as he fought so hard to stave off his own orgasm. You felt so good and he could probably come just from the sight of you like this anyways, let alone being inside you right now. Think about baseball think about baseball think about baseball—
“Yes!” you screamed. “Right there, oh fuck, Buckyyyyy!”
“Fuck,” he hissed, completely unable to think about anything but you, lost in the way you cried out his name as your walls fluttered and pulsed around him so perfectly.
Maybe he was disturbed for thinking you looked pretty with your eyes filling with tears. He was definitely disturbed for taking some pride in making you cry. Of course, only because he was making you cry from this. If he had it his way, Bucky would make you cry in only this way, every day, forever— and make sure nobody made you cry in any other way, while he was at it. You hiccuped your sob as he continued to pound into you, refusing to let up even as he leaned down to kiss away your tears. “S-so good,” you mumbled weakly, “Bucky… please…”
"Fuck, gonna come— I'm gonna come," he stammered his warning.
"Inside me, please," you whimpered, "I want it inside me."
"Jesus Christ," he hissed, shaking his head in some form of exhausted shock. You grinned, wrapping your hands around his neck and pulling him closer to you until your lips brushed against his ear.
"Bucky, I want you to come inside me," you repeated in a slow whisper. "I want every drop of your come in my pussy, I wanna be so full of you, I wanna feel it leaking out all night, I want you to make me yours."
How was he supposed to hold back anymore, with you talking like that? With you weaving your fingers into his hair and tightening your legs around his hips, with you kissing him deeply and suddenly? A weak moan was lost to your lips as he filled you, warmth washing over every part of him until he thought he might just melt. You smiled against him, and he summoned just enough strength to not collapse on top of you and surely crush you with his weight. Instead, he gave you one last kiss before burying his face in your neck, laughing exhaustedly.
"Mine, huh?” he remembered. “You really mean it?"
You hummed quietly, holding him tightly. "I probably shouldn't answer that question just after you made me come a dozen times."
"No no, you should,” he pressed as he pushed up to hover over you.
You smiled and looked back up at him. "I'm yours, Bucky."
He growled, leaning down to give your neck light teasing kisses. "Fuck, keep talkin' like that and I'll double that dozen."
"My body couldn't take it," you asserted.
"I'd make you take it," he promised.
You bit down on your lip, and he couldn't help but chuckle a little. You weren't as good at feigning innocence as you seemed to think.
"Oh, you like that," he posited. "Maybe someday I'll tie you down and make you come until all you know how to do is say my name, hm?"
"Bet it wouldn't even take you that long," you admitted. "I already feel pretty braindead."
Testing that theory, he reached down and drew light circles over your swollen clit with his thumb, even just that subtle touch making your legs and inner walls quiver as your back arched.
"Bucky," you whimpered as you tried to push his hand away, "s'too much, please…"
"Nuh uh, pretty girl, I wanna see you fall apart again. You know how many times I dreamed of making you come?"
You shook your head.
"Me either, but I wanna keep doing it until I feel like I've reached a number that at least comes close. I've finally got you in my arms and I won't let you go until I've made up for all the time I wasted."
Notably, his cock which had begun to soften inside you was now getting hard again, from some combination of watching you and feeling you in this moment.
“How do you feel about a second round?” he suggested with a smirk, even as his muscles ached already. Your eyes went wide but your walls clenched, too. That was answer enough for him. “I might break you,” he warned.
“Promise?” you smirked.
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Jesper Fahey Imagine
Jesper x female Reader
This is my first imagine ever. So pls don’t be to harsh😅
Also i m not a native English speaker so if I made horrible mistakes pls tell me nicely🙂
+ I m new to the grishaverse so there is a lot I just made up... again If I made horrible mistakes.. enlighten me 🥰
I wanna post this with he/him and they/them pronouns too. Just so nobody feels left out ✨
The winter air was terrible cold against y/n`s ears. Instinctively, she buried her face further into her scarf. She hated this time of year, especially in ketterdam. Because of the docks and the sea, it was even colder here than in her former home. She came to Ketterdam years ago, but she still didn’t seem to have gotten used to the city. The city with its dark alleys and dangerous corners. She had been told to get a decent job. Never be Outside in the dark. And above all she should Stay Out of the criminal gangs and their streetfights. And yet here she was, running again in the direction of the Crow Club to meet dirtyhands in person.
After the heavy oak door closed behind her, she took a deep breath. The warm air felt wonderful on her skin. There wasn't too much going on in the club tonight. Which pleased her very much.
" well who do we have here? I was afraid that you wouldn't come because of the snowstorm out there. ”Jesper's voice sounded happily through the room. In his hand he was holding a drink that he halfway spilled on his way to her.
Y / N didn't want to admit it, but she was happy to see him. Most of all, she was pleased that he was already a Bit drunk, so she hoped he wouldn't notice how she blushed while he hugged her.
Together they went to a table in a quieter corner of the crow club. Kaz Brekker sat there with his crowcane in his hand and sighed as Y/N and Jesper approached. Shortly afterwards she noticed Inej emerging from the shadows. She quietly sat down next to Kaz, keeping a safe distance as always. Y / N wasn't sure if she was doing it to give Kaz more space or to better protect herself. Y/N sat down next to Nina who was sitting on the other side of the table and apparently had a lot of fun giving a already drunken Mattias more and more alcohol.
Jesper sat down next to Y/N with a loud noise and started talking about his win today. He had lost a lot of money in a few card games and then won the Same Money back again after a round of chess. Inej had to explain the rules to him beforehand and was shocked that he really didn't understand how the game worked. His only luck was that his opponent understood it even less and so he had defeated him after a few rounds despite his moderate knowledge of chess.
Y/N was happy to have this group. For her, it almost felt like she had a found family, a home. The others also appreciated her very much. Nina was glad that there was another Grisha in the group. She loved challenging Y/N to play pranks on the other crow members. Even if the others wouldn't admit it, everyone loved the jokes they made up. Only Kaz usually looked offended when the two kept his people from their serious work.
She had also built up a good relationship with Inej in the two years that she had been part of the crows. Both were rather calm and liked to spend time alone. But they loved to talk about novels and books together. Inej and her had already broken into the library of Ketterdam several times at night to be able to read there in peace. Y / N fondly remembers those evenings. Especially Brekker's red-hot face when he found out what they had done. He was incredibly angry and didn't even let them be on the next mission. Meanwhile, Jesper just stood there, amused. Although he was disappointed in both of them too. But more because they didn't ask him to come along. Inej had smirked at the time and said that he was probably jealous. And to this day Y/N kept thinking about it. She could hardly imagine that he wanted to tag along because of the books.
"Hey are you even listening to me"
Jesper moved his hand up and down in front of her face.
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
Y / N knew this wasn't the first time he'd caught her thinking about him. She reached for the glass that Nina had put in front of her nose a few minutes ago. Hopefully that would take his mind off the nervous expression on her face.
"I thought it would be incredible if I would open a bakery with the money. You know the Money i won earlier"
Y/N looked deeper into her glass. In fact, she hadn't noticed what he'd told her. "Hmm interesting. I uh... would not have thought you were the bakery type. "
"Why not?" Jesper started to grin in amusement. Now he was glad that she was just so embarrassed and looking down. She was indeed looking really cute, while trying to come up with a logical answer that hopefully wouldn't hurt his feelings.
“Well you've shot at least 5 people in the last two days. And uh ... "
Jesper had to laugh out loud. "Hey hey little one, I was just kidding. I was Joking... Something like that happens when you don't listen. ”There was a big grin on his face. It felt like it went from one ear to the other. His dark eyes began to glow. Y/N didn't even notice how long the two had been staring at each other. Jesper looked away with a jerk and began to stammer something to himself, “I actually wanted to ask you something. Are we both going to break into that one library tomorrow night? I heard about this one book. And well we could steal it together. "
Y/N just had to grin. Maybe Inej was right after all and Jesper wanted to spend time with her.
"Sure, why not ... but you know that this is illegal?"
"It's only illegal if we get caught"
The next evening they both met below the roofs of Ketterdam's university district. Jesper's hair was disheveled, probably because he had slept until a few minutes ago. The night before had stolen both of their strength. None of them could really remember much. Once again, Nina had endured the most alcohol, but probably only because she was the one who made the others drink. Inej had gone to bed relatively early and in the early morning twilight still heard the singing voices of Matthias and Jesper. Y / N could roughly remember participating in a drinking game. And somehow she thought she had seen a smiling Kaz, but that would be too improbable.
It wasn't quite as cold as the night before, but because of the tiredness Y / N was all the more cold that day. Jesper didn't seem to have any other way. He had wrapped himself deep in his coat and was wearing a much too long scarf around his neck that he had stepped on twice while running. It was unusual for the shooter to be so calm. Most of the time he would talk out loud about his achievements in playing cards or he would consider a daring mission to get rich. He was very talkative, only today he was speechless.
Getting to the library was very easy there was a secured part in the south wing. Valuable writings from Kerch were stored there. But the two were only looking for a novel that would be insignificant for most People. It didn't take long for the two of them to get into the building over the roof of an adjoining building and through its courtyard.
Y / N knew her way around the library halls; after all, she had often come and gone there at night. Jesper ran right behind her, afraid of losing her between the tall bookshelves. It didn't take long for Jesper to find the right book. It was about tales and horror stories that used to be told to children in front of the campfire. Jesper had overheard Inej talking about this book. She had shared how she loved these stories as a child. That seemed like the right book for the right reason
y / n to dare a night break-in. He had longed to spend time alone with her for a long time. He admired her for her courage and caring. Jesper had been alone for a long time. Far from everything that felt like family. But the Crows gave him a home. Kaz was the protector of the crows and Jesper was happy to have someone like him, but somehow the warmth in the crow club was missing. But the warmth was suddenly there when the young grisha girl ran into his arms two years ago. She has been on his mind ever since. How many times had he caught himself paying special attention to her on missions. Or the many times she was turned on by drunkards and he would have loved to draw his revolver. Even now he could only think of her smile.
She had spread her coat on the floor and was tapping the spot next to her. Jesper sat down next to her, grinning, and began to read.
The warm sun shone on Y / N's face. What a nice way to be awakened. Most of the time she woke up by hearing gunshots in the street or the loud talk of seafarers stumbling towards the port. It smelled of old books, dust and leather. Only now did she realize that she was not in her bed. She opened her eyes carefully, hoping not to wake up in a prison or a cargo ship. But her surroundings were not unknown to her, only she had never seen them in this light. Next to her lay Jesper who had embraced her with both arms. She had never seen him so calm before. His chest moved slowly up and down as he breathed. How beautiful he looked.
"You should hire someone to make a portrait of me, believe me that will last longer."
Jesper's eyes were still closed. Y / N's face turned red again. She had to stop looking at him like that.
"Good morning, how did you sleep between so much Important literature?" She tried to distract from the subject.
Jesper opened his eyes and looked at her. Only now did she realize how close they were. He still had his arms around her. Jesper also noticed now what kind of situation they were in. He opened his mouth to answer when Y / N suddenly perceived voices from outside. She put her finger to his lips and turned her head towards the window. There were three library guards in the courtyard. They had just noticed the open window through which Jesper and Y/N had entered the building the night before.
Without thinking further, both started running. If they hurried they could still get outside via the west entrance before the university square is full of students.
Luckily for them it was easy to run through the great hall into the foyer, Jesper tried hard not to pull out his revolver to get them out of the situation, but Y/n insisted that they could flee without getting noticed. But it was too late, the guards had already spotted them. Jesper took Y/N by the hand and the two ran laughing like two school girls through the corridors until they could escape over the balcony of the west wing.
They laughed and hugged. "Oh Jesper that was close"
"Yes, If i had not been there, you would have never made it out of there"
"If you hadn't been there I would have never fallen asleep in there"
"That's right, but then I would never have been able to do this either."
He leaned over to her and looked at her with an asking expression. For a moment he was afraid of having lost his self-confidence. He wondered if he had misinterpreted anything. All the times she looked at him with a blushing face and glowing eyes. Maybe he was just wrong ...
But He couldn't think clearly anymore because he had already been interrupted by Y / N's lips. At that moment they both forgot everything around them. The dirty city, the cold winter air and the screams of the guards who were still looking for them.
Fuck, I think that's how it feels at home.
Thx for reading this😅 if you liked it pls write a comment. Just so i know if i should continue writing or not✨ if somebody has a request for an imagine just comment it or text me in my direct messages 🥰💗
Mai 🦋
#jesper fahey x reader#jesper fahey#shadow and bone#shadow and bone imagine#inejgayfa#kaz brekker#netflix#booklr#imagine#six of crows#free rein
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OK! THIS IS PROBABLY MY FAVOURITE FLUFFYNIGHTKILLER HEADCANNON I'VE COME UP WITH.
My people, I love this and I hope you do. Its a long one, but I promise its worth it.
So ever since I read this head cannon from @yuriyuruandyuraart I've had one nagging thought.
Polygamous marriage is illegal.
So as much as I loved this story of them getting engaged, they couldn't ever get married, but I didn't wanna rain on everyone's parade so I kept it to myself. Until now!
While talking with @jann-the-bean I came up with this and Jan loved it! So I hope you guys do to.
So imagine that the 3 of them are going around telling their friends and family about their engagement, in the classic happy kind of way. It's all well and good, Dream is thrilled to find out his brother is so happy. However, then he realises the law and Dream pulls his brother aside.
Dream "Uhh Night...Can I talk to you?"
Nightmare "yeah?"
Dream "I'm so happy that you got engaged brother.."
Nightmare "........."
Nightmare "but?"
Dream "but..... But isn't Polygamous marriage illegal?"
Nightmare "......."
And that was the glass shattering moment. Dream wasn't trying to be cruel or anything like that. He was just generally concerned that Nightmare hadn't thought of that.
So later that night, Nightmare brought it up to his partners and of course both of them where upset when they remembered that law. So began a long talk about what they could do. In the end Ccino mostly just said that it didn't matter to him if they were married, so long as they were together. Since he's still just a small city boy, he didn't really see that there was to much they could do, he was content to just maybe have a ceremony where they promise to be life partners, but not marry.
Nightmare and Killer on the other hand were not satisfied with that.
That Night, when Ccino was asleep the two got to talking. I like to think that over the years that Nightmare and Killer have become icons for the poly community, much like Elton Jon is one for the gay community. The two of them decided that they were going to use this to fight for the right to marry each other.
It started small. Posts on social media, comments in interviews. They started speaking out that they should be allowed to be wed. Because they loved each other and the law shouldn't stop them. There where online polls and campaigns as their fan base who had been a huge fan of the throuple started to back them up.
This is when Ccino became alerted to what they were doing. He was scared that they could damage their reputations and careers over this. He told them that he wasn't worth everything they were risking. That if they really wanted to get married, the two of them could and he'd just keep being their boyfriend.
They told him no and then lovingly told him to shut up and they would take care of it.
So began the start of a long legal battle, which all together spanned about 2 years. From when they first started talking about it online, to when the find judgment was made. They were denied.
In the end the court ruled that if polygamy was legalised, it would cause alot of issues. Its a taboo for a reason, and some people would just abuse it for their own gain.
Both Killer and Nightmare were heart broken. Ccino told them that he was so proud of them for trying and that he loved them more then ever. But Killer and Nightmare were still really upset.
This upset Ccino, because he'd seen how hard they had worked and as he thought over everything, he realised that he was actually irritated himself. In fact, he was a little angry. So now it was his turn to say No.
Ccino "you know what? No!"
Killer "what?"
Ccino "they said they couldn't legalise it because people would abuse the system"
Nightmare "yeah?"
Ccino "well I say No! That doesn't apply to us. You aren't some guy who wants a bunch of wives. We are 3 people who all love each other equally. We should have the right to marry"
Killer and nightmare "........"
Killer "we thought you said that you were ok with it"
Ccino "I'm not. Of course I'm not! I want to marry you both! "
So this prompted them to start a new campaign. If Polygamy couldn't be legalised for everyone, then they was campaign for the court to give the 3 of them legal right to marry. If a man could get the rights to marry himself (true story) and a women could be granted the right to marry a building (again, true story) then the 3 of them should be granted permission to marry.
So they took it back to court and this time Ccino took a more active roll in it, though Nightmare and Killer were more dominant. Ccino appeared with Nightmare and Killer in some interviews, but even if his mental health was much better at this point, he still couldn't fully handle all the pressure. But he put in a lot of work behind the scenes to help his partners in the case.
They Luckily still had the support of the public. They argued that they didn't want to abuse the system, they didn't want to have the bunch or wives or a bunch of husbands. They were 3 people who all loved each other deeply and just wanted to be married to each other.
Imagine the judge in court asking them why they wanted to make it legal to marry Ccino and why they couldn't just date him. And Killer just stands up like.
"dude have you seen him!? Who wouldn't want to make that fluffy marshmallow their husband?"
Then as Jan said this leaves poor Ccino (who is sat next to him) just a blushing mess and he says “Killer, don’t be so loud it’s embarrassing..”
Meanwhile, nightmare staring the judge dead in the eyes.
“I agree he’s to adorable not to marry, I mean if we don’t marry him someone else may try to steal him. And I refuse to let that happen”
(thanks for these ideas Jan)
After another 2 years or so of fighting for it. After all the public backing and the long process. Killer, Nightmare and Ccino are finally granted the right to marry.
Just imagine Nightmare trying to keep composed in court, though his having a little party in his head, and Killer on the other hand just stand on his table in court like.
"yes! Ha!"
Then he points at Ccino "guess what fluffy buns! We are marrying you!"
Ccino is so shocked, but he's also so happy. He truly never would have dreamt of this happening.
The moment that Nightmare, Killer are handed over the legal documents, they don't waste a moment, they grab Ccino and jump straight into their car. Then they drive straight to Las Vegas to elope not stopping to change or pack any clothes or anything, because they don't want to wait a second longer.
Of course Ccino gets super flustered at their suggestion to elope.
Ccino "get m-married right now!? But don't you want to wait? And have some big celebrity wedding? You mentioned it before"
Nightmare "nope"
Killer "we've been engaged for over 4 years, we want to put a ring on it right now!"
Nightmare "we don't need a big wedding, or all that stuff. We just need you to say I do"
Nightmare and Killer "so... Will you?"
Ccino "......"
Ccino "YES!"
(though maybe they stopped to pick up dream on the way. Nightmare probably knows that Dream would kill him if he missed his wedding.)
So the 3 were married in a small Chapel. Nothing fancy, but for them it was perfect. They all agreed that they would probably host a proper reception and ceremony for their friends and family to attend later. But for now, they didn't need that, they just needed to be married. It was a very small simple thing.
They probably stayed in a Vegas hotel that night. Probably had some time to celebrate. I just imagine Killer waking the two of them up the next morning with breakfast he'd ordered like:
"Good morning Husbands"
And he just can't keep the smile off his face.
About a year later they have a more formal ceremony. Which of course is super fun. But for them it doesn't change that fact that their actual wedding was truly perfect.
And dam I just love those 3. Jan was the one who wanted me to share this with you guys and I really hope you like it as much as me.
Dam it Dream XD
BTW, I know this most likely isn't fully realistic to what the legal system is like, but give me a break. I’m not a lawyer, I’m a shipper. Its fiction, just let me have it.
studio verse by @zu-is-here
original nightmare by jokublog
original killer by rahafwabas
original ccino by black-nyanko
Oh and @kotikaleo I'm sorry I forgot to tag you! You always as to be tagged in this stuff. Sorry idk if you saw it
#I hope you enjoyed this#This takes place way off in their future BTW#Like cross and dream are married and have an adopted child#I'm aloud to bend how the law works for my fluffy rom-com esc ideas#Don't judge me#The 3 of them deserven to be married#undertale au#my art#shipping#undertale multiverse#sansest#Fluffynight#cciller#Fluffyknife#Nightkiller#Fluffynightkiller#ccillermare#killer x ccino x nightmare#Nightmare x ccino x killer#Head cannons#studio versions#studio au#studio#studioverse#studio verse
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My Obikin Playlist Masterpost
I'm gonna try to explain my reasoning, but you can give each song whatever interpretation you want. Also, use them however you want if any of them inspire you to make something creative.
(PS: Sorry for my ranting on the first song. I'm very passionate about it in particular.) (Tagging @imtryingsstuff because she asked for it. Even though I was already working on this post before she asked. I have way too much free time.)
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❧ Heart + Bones - Roisin O
I've tried to sit down and write this song out Feels like a thousand times But I was always too scare of what I might find But if I keep on blocking this pain out It might be too late To heal my heart somehow Don't wanna open that wound Don't wanna replay that night Don't wanna think about you You are no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know that love is gone 'Cause if I let myself think of you I might lose my mind It's the heart and bones It's an empty soul The dreams at night that shake me to my core And I can't get up off this floor It's in the bones of me An empty soul in me The dreams at night that shake me to my core I can't get off this floor [...] Don't wanna think about you When you're no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know this love is gone [...] The dreams at night that shake me to my core I just can't take this hurting anymore [...] Don't wanna think about you You are no longer mine Don't wanna write you a love song When I know this love is gone 'Cause if I let my mind think of you I might lose it all I've tries to sit down and write this song out Feels like a thousand times
A fair warning: each and every break-up song in this playlist is basically me crying at the idea of a very heart broken Obi-Wan post RotS alone on Tatooine. But for this song in particolar I mention the repetitions with the slight differences because in my eyes they are actually HUGE! The more the song goes on, the more Obi-Wan is spiraling! The way it specifically tells that the empty soul is his the second time, like he accepts that despite what Anakin did he still thinks there's a soul there to save, and the idea of not doing so makes his soul feel empty. And the switch from "get up off this floor" to "get off this floor", literally him being so desperate he stops thinking that he wants to get up (and the last time it literally becomes "i just can't take this hurting anymore", because Obi-Wan had to see so many people he loves die, he literally can't take any more breaking of his heart). The first "you are no longer mine" is the realization hitting him, but then it becomes "when you are no longer mine" and that feels like acceptance of that realization (but then later in the song it turns back to "you are no longer mine" like he's so desperate he wants to deny it once again, distance himself from it)! The switch from "that love" from "this love", like the first time he's thinking about how Anakin no longer loves him, but then realizes that no matter how much he still loves Anakin, there is actually nothing he can do about how everything is broken. But most of all the first time it's "if I let myself think of you I might lose my mind", which is Obi-Wan still being rational about things, or at least trying not to let his mind linger on the thought of Anakin; but then at the end it becomes "if I let my mind think of you I might lose it all", because he's already thinking about Anakin and he can't let his mind linger on it, otherwise he would realize how much he lost when he lost Anakin, which is everything. And the ending too, by repeating the start, but now it has a feeling of resignation to it, like at first he was literally scared to let himself linger on his feelings because he knew he would find heart break, but now he's just empty and at the same times he knows he'll feel like that a thousand times more, because he just can't let that hurt go, he can't let his love for Anakin be forgotten. ... I love this song and it shows. I mean, the playlist is literally named after it for a good reason. I swear I'll be less wordy for every other explanation.
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❧ Black Hole - Griff
It seems like things are going really well for you I wish that I could say the same about me too I wish that I could say the same [...] Without a trace You disappeared and took some of me with you, babe Like the way I used to laugh untile my belly ached Well, that's all gone away now And boy, you know I've tried to pray, I've bruised my knees I've tried to bring you back to me I've tried my best to find some kind of peace Don't you see? There's a big black hole where my heart used to be And I've tried my best to fill it up with things I don't need It don't work like that, no, it's not easy To fill this gap that you left in me
So, I see this as a song for an AU, maybe a Modern Au. Something basic like the two of them maybe being neighbors and Obi-Wan maybe being a tutor for Anakin when he was a teen, and Anakin having a huge crush on him. But then Obi-Wan marries and Anakin is heart broken. (Don't worry the idea is also that Obi-Wan gets a divorce and comes back to Anakin, but still, the song fits for the first part of this idea). But feel free to see whatever else you want in it.
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❧ Gone, Gone, Gone - Phillip Phillips
I'll lie, cheat, I'll beg and bride To make you well, to make you well When enemies are at your door I'll carry you away from war [...] Give me reasons to believe That you would do the same for me And I will do it for you, for you Baby, I'm not moving on I'll love you long after you're gone
This is honestly a classic. It would fit with any ship, but that line about lying, cheating, etc... That screams Anakin. Like, literally canon that he would do anything to keep the person he loves with him.
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❧ What You Talking About? - Peter Bjorn and John
You used to be my hero Now you're just another boss [...] Five years as your understudy When I can't understand what you talking about [...] Tell me lies and I will listen Tell the truth and I'll be gone Tell me why I need permission [...] Shining in your shadow How could I sink this low? Our acquaintance has been so-so And I can't understand where my patience's gone
These lyrics just give me very frustrated Anakin as a Padawan trying to navigate his relationship with Obi-Wan. Not very romantic or shippy, but still relevant in my opinion.
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❧ Bruci la città - Irene Grandi
(Let) The city burn down or live in fear (that) within two hours everything will disappear anything else will disappear [...] I can't stop (myself) from screaming That I hold you to my heart To protect you from evil That I wish I could soothe Your pain, your pain [...] (Let) The stars explode (Let) The whole thing explode (Let) Everything other than the two of us die At least for a little bit At least as a mistake [...] I want to get my act together Maybe be better And shield you with my heart From catastrophe and fear
Don't really know why, but this makes me think of a quiet moment in the middle of the Clone Wars, just Anakin and Obi-Wan alone in a tent, hoping to have a moment of peace in each other's arms. (If you want the full lyrics translated let me know, I just picked my favorite parts)
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❧ Atlantis - Seafret
We got here the hard way All those words that we exchange Is it any wonder things get dark? 'Cause it's in my heart, it's in my head I never take back the things I said [...] I can't save us My Atlantis, we fall We've built this town on shaky ground [...] Now all the birds have fled The hurt just leaves me scared Losing everything I've ever known It's all become too much Maybe I'm not built for love If I knew that I could reach you, I would go
SO MUCH OBI-WAN ANGST POST-ROTS! Like, the birds that have fled are the Jedi that survived Order 66, the things impossible to take back a reference to the entire conversation between Anakin and Obi-Wan during their duel... And the one thing that always breaks me: "maybe I'm not built for love", which makes me think about that "infinte sadness" thing that comes from one of the novels. *chef kiss*
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❧ No Time To Die - Billie Eilish
I should have known I'd leave alone Just goes to show That the blood you bleed is just the blood you owe We were a pair [...] You were my life, but like is far away from fair Was I stupid to love you? Was I reckless to help? Was it obvious to everybody else? That I'd fallen for a lie You were never on my side [...] I let it burn You're no longer my concern Faces from my past return Another lesson yet to learn
Don't know about you, but this always makes me think of a lonely and bitter Obi-Wan after RotS. There's also another way of reading this honestly. This could absolutely be Anakin spiraling at the end of RotS, convinced that Padmé doesn't love him anymore; and then Vader facing Luke (the face from the past returning) and realizing the one who always lied to him was Palpatine.
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❧ White Flag - Dido
I know I left too much mess and Destruction to come back again And I caused nothing but trouble I understand if you can't talk to me again And if you live by the rules of "it's over" Then I'm sure that that makes sense But I will go down with this ship And I won't put my hands up and surrender There will be no white flag above my door I'm in love and always will be And when we meet Which I'm sure we will All that was there Will be there still I'll let it pass And hold my tongue And you will think That I've moved on
There's no doubt that this song has been overused. And it is a very classic meme, so sometimes it's hard to take it seriously. But I still love it. And I can't help but relate this to something with Vader trying to redeem himself but failing at that too, and his and Obi-Wan's relationship still being broken as fuck.
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❧ Fight the End - The playground
When it's all falling apart I'll be the one who can hold you Console you When everything's getting dark And you can't find the spark To get through I'll fight for you till the end Whatever's broken I'll mend For you If you think it's all gone Just breathe in and hold on Till the end of time
Once again, just some H/C during the Clone Wars kind vibes, but also good for an apocalypse AU of some kind.
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❧ Hanging On A Lie - Striking Matches
I'm not mentioning a specific part of this song, because the entire thing in my head is just the whole journey of Anakin turning to the Dark Side and then turning back to the Light right before he died. Seriously, up until the first chorus, it's just Anakin talking about what he feels like about Padmé's supposed betrayal. ("Baby you've been up to something / don't you tell me it's not what it looks like" but also "I might have been naive but I'm not blind" and "Don't you know you should know better than this / Than to cover up the truth with your poisonous lips/I'm not falling for it this time"). The second half of the song is Vader facing Luke. ("I'll be the one who got away from you when you / finally figure it out / you won't find me"). And the last part is Vader realizing all the lies Palpatine told him all alon. ("I'm not fallin' for it this time/try and try too little too late" and again the "you should know better than this/than to cover up the truth with you poisonous lips") A bit of a weird interpretation, that's for sure. But look at me making a song about cheating all about Anakin's journey!
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❧ Bloodsport '15 - Raleigh Ritchie
Your love is worth it and for that I will wait And though you hate me when you have a turn I drive you crazy, but you always return [...] Although you love me, sometimes we're mean Things can get ugly, but we're still a team We are an army that breaks from withing but That's why we're stronger and that's how we'll win [...] I've got your back, and though it's stacked against us I've got your hand, it's us against consensus And I will burn the people who hurt you the worst and I will no learn Cause I am too young and too dumb to consider the terms of breaking the law And I'll curse the day that they return With a smile on my face as their heads hit the floor And they're done, now it's curtains, the bloodlust's a clusterfuck, it hurts but it's working And even if you ask me to stop, it's too late because I've already decided their fate It's not a distaste, it's pure hate and it pulsates and it works its way around my brain Anyway, what I'm trying to say is I'll protect you till the day I meet my maker So don't fight me now cause you might need me later Loving you is a bloodsport Fighting in a love war It's not what I'm in love for, I'm yours I don't know if you can help it, maybe I'm just being selfish
Soooo, basically Anakin doing to Obi-Wan what he did to Padmé: loving him so much he thinks he has to turn to the Dark Side to save him. The first part I can almost imagine said by Obi-Wan, actually. Like, he's aware that sometimes Anakin hates their dynamics, but also that they are both in love... Which just ends with total madness.
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❧ Sweet Love of Mine - Joy Williams
I was broken, I was blind Lost in a moment I thought I left behind Then you woke up this dark soul of mine Carrying a light I thought I'd never find When you found me, I was all alone The whole world around me, but nowhere to call home I heard your voice sing like heaven's choir Gathered up my fears and threw them in the fire
I'm well aware this song is about pregnancy and how the singer found herself in the experience of becoming a mother. BUT, hear me out: what about an AU with either one of them being a Sith and the other one is still a Jedi. Instead of fighting each other, the Jedi tries to save the Sith, because they realize that the Sith actually never had a chance to be anything else since they grew up with a Sith as their "parent" and Master. But if we still want to keep the pregnancy element, fuck it! It's perfect for an Omegaverse AU, with Anakin maybe about to fall when he finds out he's pregnant and that is how Obi-Wan and their unborn child save Anakin. (Is this very specific? Yes. Do I care? Nope, and that's why this song made it into the playlist.)
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❧ Senza fare sul serio - Malika Ayane
There's a post on my blog already about why this song makes me think about the Jedi Order in general. I know I should probably keep it in a different playlist. Alas, it's still here. Have a link to my previous post if you are interested on reading a complete translation and the explanation of my reasoning. HERE!
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❧ Conversations in the Dark - John Legend
I will never try to change you, change you I will always want the same you, same you Swear on everything I pray to That I won't break your heart I'll be there when you get lonely, lonely Keep the secrets that you told me, told me And your love is all you owe me And I won't break your heart [...] And we, we got places we both gotta be But there ain't nothing I would rather do Then blow off all my plans for you
It's just such a lovely love song, I couldn't help myself. This seriously gives me sappy Obi-Wan vibes in any way, shape or form.
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❧ If You Ever Leave, I'm Coming With You - The Wombats
You know I'll do Whatever you want me to [...] Take you out of this You reluctant optimist And if you ever leave, I'm coming with you Stuck to the gum that's stuck on your shoe If you ever leave, I'm coming with you [...] Am I losing you in the dark baby? No more breaking stuff No more acting up Filling your head with doubt
A song about the obsessive kind of love that hints of a way too dependent relationship? Something that mentions losing themselves in the dark? Of fucking course I relate this to Anakin and the way he loves people!
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❧ Transplant - Sea Girls
You're breaking all the promises tonight I'm always dancing by myself as the music plays I'm always one step behind, off-beat, out of place Now I'm looking for you, you're looking away [...] Your heart changed Mine stayed the same I don't recognize your voice when you're saying my name Your heart changed And mine beats the same way [...] Wish I could be back in the moment We were shining, we were making mistakes 'Til your heart changed Mine stayed the same
Have I mentioned that I have a lot of RotS feels? Yeah, so, in my head the "dancing" works like an analogy to fighting and the "music" is literally the sound of battle. Which is why this fits perfectly as far as I'm concerned. An even the "always one step behind" part is just Obi-Wan not realizing Anakin was slowly turning to the Dark Side. But it can be related also to how Anakin basically felt like he didn't truly belong with the Jedi.
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❧ Read my Mind - JONES
Can't control my thoughts But I'm trying every day [...] But sometimes I want impossible things When you hear my voice, what does it say? Need a language, we're lost in translation From impossible thoughts and feelings Why don't you know before I know? What I need to say, before I can How come you don't have the answer Before I asked you the question? Wish you could read my mind [...] It's been a long time since we've been together In the same world, just want you to look at me Like I was everything you ever wanted again [...] Just hold me like I'm everything you wanted again
A good song of the two people pining will always make me think of those two dorks. And their feeling are definitely lost in translation even in canon, with Anakin never realizing how much Obi-Wan actually cares for him because of Palpatine's manipulations.
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❧ So Much It Hurts - Niki & The Dove
Oh, I ask you where you've been 'Cause you always come home late nowadays What a fool was I to think we were safe From the thieves in the temple [...] Oh, won't you bring it back? After all that we've been through together Is it now you gonna throw it all away? Oh, a love like ours Tell me, was it worth it? Oh, the thieves in the temple Oh, but you said that For better for worse You would always be there for me Always be there for me Always be there for me like I'll always be there for you Good times and bad times
So this screams Padmé being cheated on. Like, Anakin still married to her, yet he is always sneaking away after they spend time together to be in the Temple with Obi-Wan. Like, Obi-Wan is literally the thief in the Temple that steals Anakin away from her. (Which I'm sure is actually a metaphor for how the couples' marriage is the temple and someone is disrespecting it by taking away the other's lover. But look at me making this literal, 'cause why not!).
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❧ Power & Control - Marina
Give a little, get a lot That's just how you are with love [...] Think you're funny, think you're smart Think you're gonna break my heart Think you're funny, think you're smart Yeah, you may be good looking But you're not a piece of art [...] Power and control I'm gonna make you fall I'm gonna make you fall We give and take a little more 'Cause all my life I've been controlled You can't have peace without a war
Another song for an AU, this time one with both of them being Sith, most likely being enemies too at first. Before they decide to work together against Anakin's Master.
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❧ No Hero - Elisa
Don't you shut your eyes And hide you heart behind a shadow 'Cause you can count on me As long as I can breathe [...] I've fallen from grace Yeah, I'm much less a saint than a sinner Oh, no I ain't no superhuman 'Cause that's just in the movies, I know But I'll carry you throught the night Through the storm Give you love, always love in return I can't jump over buildings I'm no hero But love can do miracles I can't outrun a bullet 'Cause I'm no hero But I would take one for you [...] 'Cause I'm no hero But I'd spill my blood for you If you need me to I'll be there
Another song from an Italian artist, but this one is in English! And I totally see this song for a scenario where one of the two isn't a Jedi or even for a Modern AU. But it can totally work for Canon compliant too because Anakin is the one every calls hero with no fear. It fits then if Obi-Wan tells Anakin that he doesn't feel like a hero, but he would do anything for Anakin.
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SOOOO, this post is getting way to long (like, it was way too long even just with the first song). And I made it to an even 20 songs. I feel like this a nice place to stop for now. Don't worry, these are just the first 20. I have more in my private playlist, but I want to make another post like this when I add them to the public one. Because I can. And that's what I'm gonna do.
#obikin#obikin playlist#star wars#obi wan kenobi#anakin skywalker#if you do anything with these song please TAG ME!#I wanna know!#i get very emotional for heart + bones#it's one of my favorite song ever#the subtle poetry of it gets to me every single time#that is THE break up song#fight me over it#maybe I should have made a single post about it#that would have been smarter#oh well#also sorry for the truly terrible icon#i have no photoshop skill whatsoever#Spotify
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⸙ ˚₊ ➷ THE MIYA TWINS & BOKUTO KOUTARO AS YOUR OLDER BROTHERS ! ❞
╰─ ─ ゚headcanons of the best twins & ace of my heart being your older brothers.
✐ . . . BIG BROTHER HEADCANONS.
[ OIKAWA TOORU & KAGEYAMA TOBIO VERSION. ] [ SUNA RINTAROU & KITA SHINSUKE VERSION. ]
-ˏˋ ➶ character(s) ━ bokuto koutaro, miya atsumu & miya osamu <3
[ trigger warnings ━ slight manga spoilers !! ]
-ˏˋ ✉️ REQUESTS ARE ALWAYS OPEN.
⇣ please read the RULES before requesting.
MIYA TWINS.
➜ oh my goodness, i pray so hard and dearly for your parents because y'all are WILD WILD
➜ when you guys were young, you know those videos of twins confusing their baby on who's their parent??
➜ yeah THESE TWO TRIED IT WITH YOU
➜ it was probably atsumu's dumb idea
➜ he watched it a few days ago in youtube
➜ so he suggested it to osamu which begrudgingly accepted, curious on how you would react
“ c'mon, come to big brother 'samu ”
➜ atsumu says as he stretches his arms out to you while you're oblivious poor innocent ass was doing the grabby hands to him
➜ ngl you looked so cute he felt a little guilty for what's to come
➜ while osamu sits next to him with a monotonous expression
“ no, i'm big brother 'samu ”
➜ your head spun to his direction
➜ and you're just like 👁👄👁
➜ while switching left and right in confusion as you dropped your arms down so fucking fast LMAO
➜ while atsumu was trying so hard, really he promised he won't laugh so soon, that osamu keeps pestering him to shut his bitch as up
➜ until the faintest of sobs were heard, forcing their mini argument to a halt
“ will you stay quiet ─ ”
“ ─ oh no no no, please don't cry ”
➜ osamu is in distraught because he actually doesn't know how to take care of a child crying
➜ while astumu is trying to carry you
“ hngg i ─ hic ─ want big brother 'samu ─ hic ! ”
➜ bitch almost wanted to drop you right then and there honestly
➜ he's like ??? DOES THIS BITCH EVEN KNOW I EXIST EYE??
➜ and when osamu heard you calling out to him, something in him snapped
“ i knew this was a bad idea ─ ���
➜ as he shoved atsumu off of you, hugging you as he tries to coo you, whispering “ shh . . don't ya worry, yer big brother 'samu is here ”
➜ this MANS OHMYGOD
➜ your cries seemed to have ceased as atsumu is standing there like ??
➜ i'm thEIR BROTHER TOO !!
➜ bb boy held a grudge on you for a few weeks ngl
➜ but then you grew up and now you know that you actually have two (2) big bro 'samu
➜ but more annoying & bitchy
➜ you're their favourite victim to bully
➜ well, atsumu
➜ but they won't let their teasing lead to you crying because they actually can't stand the sight of their younger sibling crying
➜ contrary to popular belief, when you realized there was another big bro 'samu, you were now attached to atsumu while he's similing smugly and triumphly at osamu
➜ atsumu would 100% be very competitive for your attention though he makes you hate him whenever he bullies you
➜ but we all know osamu hates losing
➜ so there was definitely a time of your life that their fighting over who was the best big brother
➜ ugh y'all cute cute
➜ while you're helping osamu around the kitchen, atsumu would just watch from the side lines because the kitchen is kinda yours and osamu's thing
➜ though while in his earlier years, he'd get upset because he wants you to hang out with him too :(
➜ while you have the cooking thing with osamu, you have the baking thing with atsumu
➜ shh hear me out
➜ osamu is actually not good at baking shit
➜ the first time he attempted baking was when you joined a baking club & now you're obsessed with making cupcakes and all that good good
➜ and he wanted to also try and back
➜ and how and what did he do to make your cupcakes look like dog shit was beyond you
➜ and while smelling something burning, atsumu ran to the kitchen and after realizing what osamu did
➜ he'd try and make your next batch of cupcakes presentable
➜ because he's?? actually?? good at it??
➜ and now you guys have your baking sessions and brother 'tsumu bonding time
➜ but even though you guys have other things with the other person, you guys LOVED doing chores together
➜ like, your guys' mom would make the boys clean the bathroom and before you knew it, LIKE YOU WENT THERE JUST TO TALK TO THEM WHILE THEY CLEAN, you find yourself cleaning the toilet necause atsumu ain't doing that shit
➜ washing dishes?? that as well
➜ you and atsumu would be the ones washing while osmu would do the drying
➜ 11/10 of the time would leave you guys a damped mess
➜ while cleaning the kitchen, i absoloutely headcanon, like STRONGLY
➜ that you guys would just talk either about random shit, talk shit about someone honestly, or quote reality tv shows
➜ like one thing you would be sweeping the kitchen floor,�� and while sweeping, you accidentally hit the trash bin hard that the contents flew out of it as it fell down the floor
➜ and atsumu's like : “ pooja what is this behaviour?? ”
➜ then something clicked in you that made you remember that one show bigg boss something
➜ and you'd be like : “ i'm sorry i kicked it ny mistake ”
➜ osamu would roll his eyes before joining you two : “ you can't kick it by mistake ”
➜ “ then pick it up if it bothers you ”
➜ ugh y'all aRE ICONS
➜ y'all would be at the pool and atsumu would shout “ oh no my diamond earing is gone ”
➜ and osamu would reply “ kim, there's people that are dying. ”
➜ you'll be their biggest fan in the court
➜ whenever they play with you on the sidelines something in them just snapped and they'll be scoring points by points in a row
➜ they lowkey love to show off
➜ if you're a girl, every fangirl of they have would be wary of you at first, but then realized that you were just their little sister
➜ and to their bisexual fans, they would ngl have a huge ass crush on you too
➜ and if you're a boy as well, oH MY GOD WOULD THEY HAVE FALLEN AMD CAN'T GET UP
➜ LIKE BITCH THE MIYA GENES ARE THRIVING IN THE THREE OF YOU
➜ you bet they'd be throwing hands if someone decided to break your heart
➜ though, osamu would be the more rational one
➜ if they ever meet your s/o, atsumu would want to rile them up while osamu is just being calm but the scarier one of the two?? but he knows you don't need any protecting because you know how to do it yourself & you don't have any need for that
➜ 12/10 would recommend as brothers
➜ in conclusion, you guys may not always get along, but you know damn well they care about you and would apologize right away if they did something too far. and you guys are such good sibling goals😤
BOKUTO KOUTARO.
➜ definitely know how to deal with his emo mode
➜ since you guys grew up together
➜ and sadly, you didn't have an akaashi to help you out with it while you were young
➜ like he'd be the older brother but you would probably be the more mature one
➜ but while you guys were young, he was your knight & shinning armor
➜ like when you scraped your knee while trying to catch him, he'll do a 180° and bitch has never ran faster to you than that time
➜ & if you were crying because of it, he'll make stupid jokes but it'll always make you forget about the pain in your knee
➜ and it's one of those times that you could really see that he was actually older than you
➜ then he'll piggyback you back to your house
➜ homeboy be reliable even while he was young wow
➜ and even 'till now
➜ if you ever got sick or injured
➜ or god forbid, HEARBROKEN by someone
➜ a bitch will throw hands
➜ but before that he'll make you laugh & do his best to take your mind off whatever is causing you to hurt
➜ ngl you would always look up to him, even if he may seem childish
➜ he'll hang out with you the rest of the day, he doesn't care if it's a school day, he'll drag akaashi with him
➜ my boy here GIVES THE BEST ADVICES
➜ though he may reword them differently, but his advices never seemed to fail you
➜ fights don't usually happen, and if they do they're probably serious
➜ he's the type of brother that lets you sneak out the house
➜ he'll usually back you up in everything
➜ and this bitch would take the fall for your faults
➜ ugh WE STAN
➜ but also if you sneak out the house to your significant other, bb boy has to know their number, address, occupation etc.
➜ because he ain't having a broken hearted sibling
➜ and he just wants the best for you
➜ and in the future, though he may be busy with being a professional volleyball player;
➜ he'll always have time for you
➜ he'll cLEAR OUT HIS SCHEDULE JUST FOR YOU
➜ you're that urgent to him
➜ your his first best friend before volleyball
➜ speaking of volleyball, if you aren't found in the stands in his matches ─ he'll go TO EMO MODE Y'ALL
➜ because you're usually always there in his games and it makes him give all his 120%
➜ since he's usually busy, he'll ALWAYS have those covey sisters movie nights
➜ if ykyk
➜ he's a sucker for family bonding time ogey
➜ the type to binge watch all the hsm movies & know all the lyrics to all the songs
➜ the type to defend sharpay with all his might
➜ and you guessed it right
➜ sharpay is his favourite character
➜ no one tell me otherwise
➜ THE TYPE TO DUET SONGS WITH YOU
➜ HIS FAVOURITE?
➜ EVERY SHARPAY & RYAN SONGS
➜ HE'LL BE SHARPAY AND YOU'LL BE RYAN
➜ AND THAT'S ON BOP TO THE TOP
➜ hates horror movies
➜ so if you ever watch it with him, he won't leave your side for the rest of the night & will have a sleepover on the living room
➜ f o r t s
➜ loves doing ridiculous challanges
➜ your phone would be BOMBARDED with crackhead videos of him
➜ probably broke a bone or two ngl
➜ 100/10 would recommend as a brother
➜ in conclusion, he may not always be there, and would be a bit childish & needy at times; but you know that he would step up as a big brother for you ANYDAY, ANYNIGHT, ANYTIME. because how could he want the best for you when he's not being his best on his part?
-ˏˋ playing soleil's tape ˊˎ-
[ 📼 ] . . . tumblr won't let this post show on the tags now i have to repost them all over again phew chile. watch me throw hands😤
#haikyuu social media au#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu imagines#miya atsumu x reader#miya osamu x reader#bokuto koutaro x reader#haikyuu masterlist#haikyuu smau#oikawa tooru smau#miya atsumu smau#hq imagines#haikyuu drabbles#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#miya atsumu headcanons#miya osamu headcanons#bokuto koutaro headcanons
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𝘼𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝘼𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣, 𝙉𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 || .G.D.
(This songs an oldie, but It popped up on my random artist playlist, and I was inspired. Haha, enjoy ig..)
Title: Alone Again, Naturally
Summary: Veronica Chandler seems to be only destined for heartbreak. After a failed attempt to rebound on her toxic ex, she makes a routine trip to her local 24 hour Starbucks, in which she meets a handsome stranger.. and oh, who happens to be the spitting image to the photo of the tinder date who stood her up....
Relationship: Grayson Dolan and Veronica Chandler
Word Count: 2,034
Tags (*updated*) : @dzoint @graysavant @blindedbythelightt @tadadolan @heartofalionxo @beatement-l @grayswhore @tattoogray @saggitariusagirl
Author’s note: First, this is total shit, i’m sorry. Second, I did the stupidest thing of all time. I gave my OC the same name as the main character in the novel i’m writing on wattpad (to self plug, or not to self plug that is the question; i’ll take self plug for 100, Alex) why am i so stupid? Well, i'm too lazy to change it so.
Third, i was inspired when the twins talked about dating apps and just like idk where this came from, must be out of my ass because it’s shit.
I actually laughed at that...
Fourth, feedback is like the most important thing to me, like ever? So, feel free to lmk what y’all think, if this becomes a series I will be taking concepts.
Veronica Chandler is destined for great things. Planning her future, modeling and working as a struggling actress, she could go off and marry some lawyer. But, the only thing she did seem destined for was heartbreak.
Ronnie knew it had been too soon. Not even a month ago she had broken up with her ex, Jonathan. She also knew this, when she was attracted to a man on tinder with the same name, mostly because of the name. She wasn’t over the man who man who ruined her life to all hell. But, the comfort of a relationship was all she needed and desperately strived for.
Jonathan, was an artist, mad at the world needing to find himself. So, each night he did just so. Jonathan would go out to ‘find himself’ and along the way he found, Roxanne, Malibu, Dianne and Eileen. Jonathan drank, and he would physically and mentally abuse a good strong woman, who for the longest time couldn’t bring herself to walk out of his life.
Each time, from the first to the third she was too lonely, desperate and down on herself to let him loose. But, after he cheated on her with a married forty-year-old woman with four children, that was when Mama Chandler intervened and scared him half to fucking hell. That woman raised no fool, and if she did it was Veronica’s older brother, Noah. Veronica was just a sad young woman who couldn’t keep a man because they used her.
This night in particular was her rebound date at a local vegan restaurant. A fancy one. With velvet rugs, chandeliers, expensive wines, however with decently sized portions. Veronica stood outside waiting for Jonathan. Who was described in his photo as muscular, a builder with brown hair and eyes and often in there messages boasted about such muscularity.
It was dark. He planned to meet her at 5:30. It was 7:30. Groups passed her. Parties on the street began talking, while the mannequins in store fronts slept under the lights. But, Ronnie was sure, this guy was genuine, and would be the best rebound.
But, her plans and dreams were foiled when 8:30 hit, she decided to leave embarrassed and ashamed she thought it would turn out differently, she should have known. Her mosquito allergy becoming aggravated just as much as her. She sulked. She never really dressed to impress others, she wore heels, a leather jacket paired with a silk revealing top and boot cuts black jeans. That’s when the heaven on earth shone down upon her, a burning bush of sorts.
A 24 hour starbucks.
As she walked down the sidewalk slowly, she was tired of being let down; tired of catering to the whims of others, ready to return home and make a stray of financially irresponsible choices online, she entered through the glass doors and into the small shop in Hollywood. The cool yet humid summer air from outside was left behind in the warmth of the shop, that’s when she saw him.
A tall handsome stranger, brown hair and eyes, with muscular arms. She fell for him immediately, he was gorgeous. But, then. Veronica realized something, the same man, the handsome stranger, was either the same person or a bicep by bicep replica of the man she was supposed to meet tonight, at that Vegan restaurant.
The fire fueled deep down, but she ignored it when she got in line to the left of him ready for her Pink Drink and croissant so she could run to the nearest Ralph’s and purchase two tubs of strawberry ice cream, she’d be needing it. The line shifted. She shifted on her feet, he did the same.
Veronica tapped her foot. That’s when the stranger started talking,”Whoah. Slow down there ‘Miss i’m on a mission’.”
His voice was deep and hoarse, he sounded like he had been having a night himself. Veronica ignored the voice that in some ways drew her closer.
“I’m Grayson, By the way..” the named stranger drifted. That’s when Veronica snapped. The man was Jonathan or she thought, and he was ignorant enough to poach the woman he stood up, again, she thought.
“How can you be so arrogant and glib, after everything you’ve done?” Veronica whipped her head to the right of him snapping out of anger and then with no response
“Ah, she’s brave. Calling me arrogant and glib, without even knowing me, cool.” Grayson scoffed and nodded, shrugging it off, and moving forward in the line before stopping yet again.
Ronnie tapped her foot miserable an angry…”Without knowing you? I know you. Your the kind of guy who’s shows up a girl, and breaks the rules because you think it’s cute.”
“Do You think it’s cute?” He lanced over to her smirking a devilish smirk. She scoffed and crossed her arms with her jacket draped over one of them, shaking her head as the crazily long late night line, shifted forward. ‘Grayson’ may have won the battle by showing her up, but his blatant lies would lose the war to Veronica.
“Spare me your routine, i assume that’s what this” she gestured to Grayson,”-cut it out okay? Or, i’ll make your life a living hell.”
“Sorry, not into a relationship at the moment,” he joked before turning back to face the options board, even though his order was almost always the same. Ronnie rolled her eyes. Ronnie's eyes were tired. She felt physically ready whoop this man;s ass, but mentally and emotionally drained.
“And, by the way. No. I do not think it’s fucking cute..” Veronica replied after a few moments of silence. Veronica mumbled cruising, barely audible to Grayson. Veronica was so confused, and so irritated, she didn’t no what to believe. She sighed and went for her phone fumbling for her back pocket, and opening the tinder profile of ‘Jonathan’, “Explain this.”
The screen illuminated a photo of Grayson with the name Jonathan below it. He had still had long hair at this point, right before it’s annoyance shaggy length.Grayson was shirtless in the photo with a chain necklace around his neck. Grayson squinted to examine the photo on the app and chuckled as he passed it back to Veronica.
“You, my dear, got catfished. By someone posing to be, yours truly. I’ve never had tinder and haven’t used a dating app since I was like, fourteen..�� Veronica rolled her eyes at his comment before scrunching her brows in confusion but not enough to continue to pry,”..don’t believe me? Search ‘Grayson Dolan’ on instagram or twitter, you’ll owe me an apology.” Grayson snapped as hurt in reply and turned away from the fabric keeping a distance between the two.
Grayson felt for Veronica, he could hear the pain in her silence, the sadness in her eyes, the facade of a mask she put on, even if he didn’t know her name, like her he had been pining for love. The same night he had been dumped via text by his ex girlfriend, also his ghost of days of business past, ex- assistant, before Sterling. He should have known it was a mistake, and Ethan warned him several times, but much like Veronica with OG Jonathan, he blamed love for his feelings.
Grayson was tired, wanting to head home with a cup of joe, but this unidentified juliet, across from him caught his eye, and there was no turning back.
The line shifted. Hesitantly she opened instagram and search the name and she stopped, in her tracks. She owed this man apology, Grayson Dolan, he was a real guy, with a huge following however she never heard of him. She followed him, sighed and put her phone back into her pocket.And yes, he was good looking, she fell for the looks a little more than the name.
“..i--i’m sorry. Guess you were right, I was wrong..” Veronica managed to croak out. Grayson’s phone notified him from his pocket, he checked it smirked, followed her back and placed it back into his pocket.
Grayson looked over to the brunette Brazilian to the right of him. She tapped her foot nervously, as she picked her brain for a better apology. She felt herself loosen, knowing he was just trying to help, and didn’t stood up. Her demeanor changes, this man was a kind stranger who just happened to be the man in the photos she was catfished with, the real Grayson did nothing wrong.
“-., so this Jonathan, what happened?” He asked looking into her dark brown eyes, meaning it. Wanting to know everything about the stranger that made him want to know here. She laughed flashing a smile all the while. Her laugh, Grayson thought. The way she talked and laughed, when she was enjoying herself, it was all so lyrical, it made him want to laugh.
He looked at Veronica, like, really looked at her. The way the lighting reflected on her sparkly eyeshadow. Her dark green eyes, her long luscious and free riding dark brown hair, that had been straightened from its naturally curly form.
“..Well, I uh, met him on Tinder and he stood me up. I just got out of a nast relationship and he was my rebound, but he’s probably some weird guy living in his mother's basement-” she sighed opening up to him. She smiled at her own comedic relief comment. Hiding behind humour was something she did.
Grayson laughed, becoming serious,”I’m sorry, that sucks. What about your ex?”he pried further, there were only three people in front of them, all by themselves, swarmed by the world living in their phones.
“He was a cheater, a drinker and beater, who just so also happened to be named Jonathan..” the negative memories stirred up again in front of her. The pain on her shoulder came back, so did the reminiscence, drawing and pulling her into a melancholy flashback.
~~~
"Where would you like me to go, hmm? Ronnie!" he shoved her to the ground and she fell backwards dislocating her shoulder. She winced in pain, it had pulsated throughout her body. She knew she had to do this, for herself, the well being of herself for once. Did she want to? No. It scared her. He scared her.
Once he got the clout he wanted he changed, he was living off of her earnings, living in her apartment at the time, using her car, and she was forced to nod and smile along with it like some big ugly joke of a play.
"How about for starters-" she managed between heavy sobs of pain and trying to prop herself against the reclining part of the sofa she was thrown in front of,"..hell? Take your toothbrush and your shave kit, and try some bleach in your cereal, i'm done. Okay? Go away, J!"
~~~
Ronnie was back to reality when she heard Gray's voice,"..Safe to assume you have a type, then?"he asked really looking at the beautiful woman in front of his eyes.
“Yeah. I try so hard but,”Veronica felt sad,” but, i’m never the one.” she felt even sadder memories of her ex flashing before her, she shrugged it off and continued,”…alone again, naturally, I guess.”
Grayson and Veronica were now the first in line,”Hey, let me buy your drink. Maybe we could be alone again, together…” Veronica smiled, and nodded.
“I’d like that..”
~~~
Later that night the two walked into the humid, yet comfortingly cool, heat together side by side after a two-hour conversation just on life.
“I, uh, better walk to my car.” Veronica said in front of Grayson’s porsche. Her jacket was around her shoulders and covered her arms,”I had fun, tonight” she held out a starbucks napkin she secretly wrote her number on, the wind tossed it gently back and forward. He smiled and breathed out a friendly, good night. He hated to see her go so soon, but would love to watch her leave.
“Wait, I never got your name-”he hollered down into the cold night on the streets of Los Angeles. Veronica turned around and continued walking backwards, her hair following and tracing her every move.
“It’s Veronica.” she breathed before giving him one last look with her deep green eyes and turning back down the sidewalk, heading to her car and driving into the night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Should I make this a series? If so, what to name it, i’m thinking lyrical and each chapter is a song name? lmk.
AHH i'm nervous to post this, but fuck it, right? No day but today.
i’ll stop.
#grayson dolan#Ronnie loves Gray#grayson bailey dolan#grayson dolan au#grayson dolan x oc#grayson dolan imagine#dolan twins#ill probably delete this in the morning#grayson dolan fanfic#dolan twins fanfic#dolan twins fandom
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RULES AND PROCEDURES
BEFORE YOU INTERACT / FOLLOW !
this blog contains and interacts with nsfw and dark content, however, i do occasionally write sfw. minors are allowed to interact with my sfw works, but aren't allowed to interact with me personally or anything that contains adult themes. blank and ageless blogs are not allowed to interact with any works, even sfw. so if you do, you will be blocked. this blog is not spoiler free.
i shitpost pretty often so please consider that before following. this blog is not just for writing and i talk a lot about things that i enjoy or just things in general, but there are tags that you could block if necessary.
do not interact if you fit basic dni criteria, bring drama to my blog, don't believe that fictional characters shouldn't be aged up or if you are a pro-shipper. this will never ever be a safe space for you, so don't even bother.
i am a pretty slow writer and i tend to delete wips that i am either not motivated to write anymore or just believe that aren't good enough. i have writer's block often so that is one of the main reasons why i do the things listen above. please do not ask for a part 2, it makes me feel a little bit overwhelmed as i do suffer from anxiety and get mixed emotions pretty easily, and usually my emotions control me more than i am able to control myself.
INTERACTING !
please refrain from spamming my inbox. i use tumblr via website and it already acts up and i might send something to the wrong person ; or the site will just act up and do things on it's own. emoji anons are welcome.
i hard block and block freely, so please do not reach out to me to ask why i did. as stated i have anxiety and get uncomfortable really easily by people's vibe or attitude, and since this is my safe space, i believe i am allowed to control who i see on my blog. if it seems that i unfollowed you / broken our mutual, please let me know because i have problems with the app sometimes and this is most likely a glitch.
if you are going to break our mutual, please hard block me because i'm pretty stupid and i'm just going to follow you back. i hate making people feel uncomfortable and i want to steer clear from doing so.
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don't dm me unless we are mutuals. it makes me uncomfortable. if you'd like to talk to me, send an ask, i love talking to my followers (you must have an age in bio - if you don't your ask will be deleted and i will block you) .
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WRITING !
this blog is a multifandom so you'll see a mixture of different fandoms from time to time ; though i prefer to write for fandoms i feel like i can write for without getting writer's block, which is jojo's bizzare adventure, my hero academia, jujutsu kaisen and hunter x hunter.
i do take requests, but that is only once in a blue moon. thirsts and suggestions are always open though. if i get inspired by a thirst/suggestion i will make it longer than usual but do not expect content. i only write when i have free time or have something done ; because i do have a life outside of tumblr.
refrain from recommending my work outside of tumblr.
please be aware that my blog contains dark content like stepcest, lactacion etc. i will try to make tags for every dark content that i write, so if i do, you can either block the tags or block me in general. feel free to do whatever.
all characters are aged up or post timeskip! ; if you don't believe in aging up characters dni, i will not indulge in this discourse.
if you've made it this far, thank you so much! i appreciate your time.
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Hey dx. Hope you're well. I don't know if you remember this ask, but I'm the anon who asked a few months ago about supporting a friend in med school with depression and finding it a bit much. A lot has happened since then. She's sadly left med school and has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Currently she doesn't really have stable periods and is either high or low. I got kind of ok with having boundaries with texting etc/meet-ups only when actually able to. Part 1
Part 2. Anon supporting friend here. Recently she’s been high and has been messaging me nearly all day every day/asking if I’m there if I take time to reply/constantly updating me on what she’s doing/sending me all her family pictures. I’m finding it really stressful and overwhelming, tried turning off my notifications yesterday but still keeps going. My own anxiety is flaring up and I’m stressed hugely with workload.
Part 3. Anon supporting friend. I’ve told her I take time to reply because I’m stressed/overwhelmed and yet the messages keep coming. I know she’s hypomanic/manic so she probably sees things in a different perspective atm and forgets that it’s too much. I’m wondering whether it’s worth asking her to please message a little less as I find it overwhelming to get so many messages each day, or whether it will just not work as she isn’t in her right mind. Part 4. She has got professional help in place. She’s fallen out with her other friends because they don’t message her when she’s low etc/her best friend has distanced herself from her because she doesn’t know what to say. I don’t want to not be friends but I need to work something out! I’m trying to remember she’s ill but I’m starting to feel unwell too. Any advice?! PS. I know this is an extremely long ask and that you’re very busy, so please take your time if you need
Hey, I’m glad to hear from you again. I’m so sorry for my late reply; I rread your ask at the time, and thought about it a lot. But I had to take some time to process my own life problems and mental health, and I couldn’t really give most of my asks the time or energy they deserved, so I had to leave them until they could. Which is kind of the theme of this ask, ironically. But I hope late is better than never. Thank you for your message at the end of your ask, it’s very much appreciated :) I’m so sorry that your friend’s going through a rough time, and that you are, too. I’m so sorry to hear that she left med school; bipolar is a truly difficult illness, she has been on a really tough journey. I’m glad she has professional support; that’s always a huge deal because the right treatment and support can revolutionise people’s lives. I’ve seen it, and though I don’t think the way we treat mental health is perfect, I do think we can do so much good by acknowledging mental illness and treating it properly. And taking people seriously. I’m glad to hear you started to work out some boundaries that worked for you; it’s tough, but it’s good to hear that you made some progress, even if it doesn’t always work out as well as you hope, it’s still progress. You’re right to put your own wellbeing first; it’s hard for us to support others if we’re being brought to a mental breakdown ourselves. It’s a hard lesson for us to learn, but you can’t serve others with a broken/empty cup. I think it’s a really fair idea to turn off notifications to avoid overloading yourself. She can keep going; thats OK. You can’t control your friend’s mania, or how ‘full on’ they are; perhaps not even they can. Unfortunately, that’s part of the illness. And it seems you understand that well, deep inside. She might process things differently, and I think you’re an excellent friend for doing your best to support them, and understand what they are going through. I’m putting this under a cut because it’s long.
Everyone reacts differently to being told the truth, so only you will know how they might respond. Sometimes we can just tell people ‘sorry, I’m not feeling well so I might not respond much’. Sometimes we invent excused to be kind or because we aren’t ready to talk about the entire story; in my view, in personal* settings, it’s OK to tell white lies not to hurt people sometimes. I’ve told friends I’ve been sick or oncall when I couldn’t attend events because I was physically exhausted or not feeling well, because I really cared about seeing them but didn’t want them to think I was not coming because I was not bothered. However, with close friends I’m honest, and the vast majority of the time, if I say I’m oncall, it’s because I’m actually oncall. I don’t like fibbing, and I don’t like hurting people’s feelings, so it’s a fine line, but I���d rather feel a bit guilty than make others feel bad. It might be OK if you tell her that you sometimes need time to reply because you are overwhelmed; have you ever discussed your own mental health issues with them? Do they get that you get really anxious or overwhelmed? It might depend on how much insight they have into their own state right now, and perhaps it’d be difficult for them to moderate how they act, or how they feel about it. However, if you find yourself having to take quite a bit of time to yourself, don’t feel shy to just tell them “I’m not ignoring, you, I just wasn’t feeling well and had to take a break, I’m listening now”. Or you could say “I care about all your messages, and I always read them all, but sometimes I can’t reply to them all at once because I’m busy/overwhelmed/tired/unable to process it all”. If they get upset because you haven’t replied, it might help to reassure them that you do care (because this is, deep down, what they fear”, and that you care about their wellbeing, but that other issues in your life have been stressing you out, too. And that you just didn’t want to bother them with your stress, so needed to take some time out. There are ways of discussing it that don’t outright lay the blame on them, or make out that they are the cause of your problems, when it’s not true, and therefore avoids making them feel guilty for things outside of their control. Something can be not the cause of our problems/stress and still be overwhelming, and if you’re able to be honest with them, I think that’s a good way to put it across. As well as the idea that in order to be truly there for them, and have enough energy and time to be able to support them, sometiems you need to take time out to process the other things in your life. Work, uni, family, love life, etc, whatever it is. Telling someone “I have a lot of thigns in life that are stressing me out, and draining my energy, and sometimes I need to take some time out to process/fix them, and rest before I can chill with you and help you, and be happy with you, because otherwise I’d spend my time with you stressed and miserable and might make you feel worse” makes sense. I can’t say if that would work for your friend, but I feel a lot of people would understand that. In the end, I am sure they care about you, too. But because of their own illness and issues, deep down they are probably terrified of losing you too. They know that their illness can make things harder for them, harder for those around them, and they probably feel really bad about that; we all beat ourselves up over stuff like that. Reminding them that you care, and want to be there, and want to be strong and rested so you don’t bring them down with your own problems is actually a kindness to them. I remember publishing a similar ask/anwer/post by someone else who answered a similar question, because it reminded me of you and your ask. I hope you saw that, it might be tagged under my #mental health and medicine tag. You come across as a supportive, loving friend who is doing their best, please don’t feel guilty if you have to put yourself first. I hope you and your friend take the time you need to heal. * In professional settings, we’re bound by the rules of probity. We don’t lie in medicine. TBH my parents raised us to NEVER LIE, which makes working in medicine easier because I’m a terrible gulty fibber who likes to follow all the rules and who doesn’t even like parking in the wrong place, much less anything exciting.
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