#i'll come back in the morning for a bullet point post of stuff

[incendiorum]

on the eve of your own murder, you wake, alone. you came back for revenge.

in 283 CE, the universe doesn't spin the way it should have. a man does not die, but he is, in one fell move, usurped. betrayed, he and his lover are forced to run. and run they do. into the carpathians and north, north, north and back again. when the new world is the thing in everyone's mouth, they make the journey west. and west is where they are, inevitably, caught.

for a long time, they make it and make it well. for a long time, it seems like they've finally shaken the hounds on their scent trail. the lawlessness of the dry west is sweet as molasses. canyonlands and mountain ranges tall enough to scrape the sky and just as good to vanish into. dead or alive posters are an allure. when one can't make the kill, the other can. and between them both they have the funds to live a good life. it's when they settle down, amongst pinyon and juniper, that real life catches up to them.

the universe turns right, this time. lucius inevitably dies. but this time iovita dies with him. bloody and awful and sobbing. and... only one of them comes back.

resurrected, iovita dedicates their life to revenge. tracking down each and every hound that ever dared to scent their trail or speak their name. they're the cruel god of the west, a desert vagabond with nothing to their name except for a mean red mare and an even meaner temper themself. stories follow them like flies to deathly miasma. that sometimes, if you're alone at night, a stranger will show and ask to share your fire. deny them, and you're soon for death at nature's hands. allow them, and they'll tell you stories to shake you down to your bones. and if you tell them valuable information about the people they seek, they'll reward you with something grand. something you desire above all else.

dead man walking. woman in white. a riderless horse and a ridge full of patient vultures. your lack of hospitality on the range will be treated accordingly.

[midnight-mourning]

Good morning, mourning! is it possible for you to show us how you make an outline for writing a chapter sometime in the future? like what does your first rough rough draft look like?🤔

also whats your favorite vine/meme at the moment?🫣

Hi pip!!

I can actually show you RIGHT NOW as I keep all my outlines (for the most part) saved in their respective chapters

*added a read more post-answering bc this got LONG lol*

So, it's sometimes a bit dependent on the fic, what I'm writing at the time, and where I'm at in the process. I usually have two different methods I stick to and typically combine in some manner:

bulleted list of important scenes/ideas to expand out upon from there (typically how I start out ideas for oneshots)

big blurb paragraph of a flow of ideas from start to finish (typically how I start out chapter-based fics, and what I do for Confused Spirit)

From there, I'll then combine the two methods in some way if it's a oneshot, and if I'm struggling to get the words flowing for a chapter-based fic, I'll use the list to expand out upon things I wrote originally. For example, this was ch. 34's outline (spoilers for those who haven't read it yet):

and then the list I added once I got started properly, which I crosssed out as I went along. Fun fact, you can see where I hit a moment of greatness in that last bullet and the chapter came together as a whole from there:

the blacked out is things I've pushed back for later (or just general spoiler stuff), so you can see that inital plans and even those I make WHILE writing the chapter are still subject to change as I go into actually writing it. Another good example would be from ch. 32:

in this case, I went back and added to the original outline (I think you can tell where lmao) and didn't utilize a list

I'd love to find chekov's gun, bc that one was REALLY good if I'm remembering correctly but I think it's buried somewhere in the Dialogue Dump unfortunately 😔

Adding on to that, I write a lot of scene ideas/mainly dialogue for things that happen in the future as the ideas don't typically come to me in chronological order. the party from 33? like a month into writing the story. the team meeting Michael? mid-arc 2. Chekov's gun? the start to midway point in the first couple days of writing and then basically finished within by the middle of august (started in July for those that don't know)

My point being that there's a lot of things that I have saved for certain arcs/plot points that I then insert into their proper place in the story once I find where that is. For arc 3 in particular I took the approach of gathering all the dialogue i KNOW was going to be in the arc, wrote my lil blurbs for all the chapters, and then started placing them accordingly. stuff has (and probably will continue to) gotten shuffled around, but for the most part has stayed in their original places.

a rough rough draft beyond that is basically adding to those base scene ideas (sometimes in order, sometimes not) typically writing dialogue and then filling in the blanks from there! sometimes if I'm lucky I can write a chapter from (mostly) start to finish in a span of four hours or so but that's only when i'm REALLY cookin'

Sorry for the super long winded response, didn't realize how much I wrote until I did it 😅

TL;DR, blurb of ideas, organize those ideas/add to them or adjust, full send it from there (with the potential help of some dialogue along the way)

As for my fav vine/meme currently? Probably the lump fish guy, everytime someone says 'very mindful, very demure' (I am not on tiktok so I do NOT understand this one) I instantly think 'very beautiful, very powerful'

thanks so much for the lovely ask!!! <3 <3 <3

[seethesunny]

Are you a planner or a freestyler when you write, or somewhere in between?

Helloooo and morning Miss Australia, this is a good question! 🤔

Cannot sleep, so I'm answering right away:

It's not secret that I'm a control freak (hate categorizing me like that but honesty is an inherent part of our lives and that is pretty fitting, so it it what it is), and that has been a prominent thing in my writing since forever, even when it was like random stuff that got scribbled down on a notebook haha

This means that's why I can't post long fics without having no direction, planning or "ahead" writing beforehand, I'm not posting something I know I won't finish so it's better if I have everything done from the start. Is it too idealistic? Yes. There's nothing some spite can't hurry up.

I think that puts me more on the planner side since I really need to have an outline before fully delving into said idea. While I can absolutely write in the moment and freestyle whatever I want—legit there are times when I get possessed—and considering I'm most known for doing oneshots pursuing one idea/concept/theme at a time, and I'm good at improvising, still I prefer to have something backing up what I'm coming up with.

I have the tendency to make two documents (one for the real writing, one for the outline with bullet points and sometimes inspo), occasionally I'll check them and drive myself nuts by changing important stuff, or rearranging ideas, or adding something totally different, but watching this slow process turn into a story is fascinating and while I'm not someone that shares my stuff (I try not to gatekeep okay) there are days when I spend time reading what I'm weaving together and I know one day maybe someone will love it as much as I do.

But writing as a whole? Just the habit of putting something down? I can do that. Some of these eventually become something bigger, so I don't necessarily need to have the planning first before writing, just that the process of coming up with a story involves lots of planning and polishing, and some awful sleepy writing.

Anyway, considering my tendencies, I'm gonna have to go with planner 🧍🏽‍♀️

[study-sleep-tea-repeat]

Soon to be college freshman, Can you give me advice? Like what I'll need when I move into dorms? Study tactics? Things like that? (Also, I wanna be a teacher!)

That’s so awesome!!! Here are some things off the top of my head:

Dorm supplies

(Technically I wrote these for another post a while back but I still stand by these recommendations tbh)

A good lamp (ideally a sunlight lamp or something that has natural-looking light so you don’t hurt your eyes too much at 2 am)

A storage tower thingy (great for toiletries and other small stuff like that)

A fluffy rug makes a hugeeeee difference in my opinion

Hanging shoe rack (you can put hats, belts, socks, etc. in it, not just shoes!)

A planner or notebook for a bullet journal (if desired)

An essential oil diffuser + your favorite essential oil scents (instead of air fresheners, I think they give a much nicer feeling plus you can customize it way more)

Fairy lights

One of those comfy armrest pillow thingies idk what they’re called ok

A good pair of headphones!

A good water bottle that DOESN’T LEAK

Mildliners or some other nice-looking highlighters (if you like to highlight your notes or textbooks)

Study tips

When you’re trying to focus, seriously put your phone away somewhere you can’t see or use (I like using the app Forest and putting my phone in a drawer, though there are a bunch of other similar apps out there such as Flora, Plantie and Study Bunny!), turn off any notifications that would come up on your laptop, and close any tabs that you’re not currently working on. I know this is so one of those things you see in every list of advice, but it truly can make such a difference in my opinion!

Have a system for keeping track of assignments. I use Notion, but at different times since being in college I’ve also used a planner or a bullet journal, so find a system that works for you and use it religiously

Keep a calendar of classes and other meetings. I use Outlook but you could also use Google Calendar or even just writing it down in whatever planning system you choose. Don’t just rely on yourself to remember when your classes are, because at some point you’ll miss a meeting. It also gives you more peace of mind and mental space for other things, too

Personally, I find that doing a quick and easy task in the morning before I move onto more difficult assignments helps a lot with motivation, so give that a try and see if that also works for you! Some people also like doing their hardest task first, so just figure out which one suits your life the best

Tbh I have a lot more tips but they’re so dependent on like what types of classes you’re taking, if they’ll be online vs in-person, so hmu if you want more specifics!

Other tips

If you are truly not wanting to do a piece of homework, try to figure out why that is instead of just forcing yourself. A lot of times it can be that you are ignoring things like hunger, exhaustion, mental health, etc. and it’s really important that you take care of some of those essential things first. Mental health comes above schoolwork, and you need to make it a priority in your life so you don’t get burnt out

Have a life outside of schoolwork. Join a club, do volunteerwork, make some friends and talk about things other than classes, go into town from time to time, pick up or continue doing a hobby, anything really. So many people get completely stuck in their college schoolwork bubble that they forget to also live their life somewhere in there too

Best of luck!!! I hope things go as smoothly as possible for you!

[transsexualhamlet]

Because you have many lgbtq+ Ships, do you maybe know some mangas with actually lgbtq characters?

Yes, I do! There aren't a ton that suit my tastes out there, since a lot of manga that are actually lgbt are just focused on romance, which is very boring to me. But for questions like this, I always recommend No. 6.

I've done it more than a few times on this blog before, but I will do it again lmao.

It's older, the anime came out in 2013, but it's actually one of the first animes to feature a same-sex kiss. It's based off a manga which is based off a light novel. I'd say the manga has a FAR superior art style to the anime, but the anime is also very good and has wonderful colors, soundtrack, and generally it's just. It's really good.

It's set in a post-apocalyptic dystopia, about 100 years after nuclear war left only six spots on earth habitable. Leading scientists and politicians then decided to build six huge cities on those spots, burning down all the original forests and literally killing all of the natives, yknow, great stuff /s. They continue to be awful to the native population, experimenting on them to get the Magic From The Region etc it's pretty awful.

So the story is set in + around the 6th city. The main character, Shion, lived a rather priveleged life inside its Heavily Policed walls labeled as a gifted student until at 12 he meets Nezumi (literally Rat) who basically climbs in his window with a bullet wound and goes "hey yall just escaped from being experimented on let me sleep here or i'll kill you" and shion just goes "HOT" and lets him have a sleepover. Nezumi than Completely And Utterly Radicalizes him but has to flee the next morning.

The police find out about this, don't like it, he gets kicked out of the rich neighborhood and designated to trash duty lol. Yeah also then four years later parasitic bees start coming out of nowhere, (yeah) and Nezumi comes back gayer than ever and starts beating the shit out of police officers and yeets Shion. They become gay. Shion starts a life of crime. It is wonderful.

That's like, kind of a bad synopsis of everything that's going on in this show, here's some other points you might want to know:

-Nezumi literally does drag and I love that for him

-best dynamic aka aggressive one gets soft and soft one gets aggressive

-they have the cutest scene where Nezumi and Shion dance together it's so pretty and the music is so good

-obligatory character goes through traumatic event and comes out with white hair moment

-Shion has a GirlBestFriend who keeps trying to flirt with him and he's sooooo gay and she sooo does not get it

-um, the power of singing to bees i guess

-They have a really cool girl who's implied to be trans too so there's that, I love her so much

-there's a lot of lore that goes into this one, seriously it's so good and has all the right messages about stuff, yknow, it is a sci-fi fantasy and you have to take that into consideration but it genuinely talks about class stratification, mass incarceration, policing, government taking advantage of native lands and peoples, a lot of that heavy stuff

In general, it's kind of supposed to be a cute aesthetic show but it kind of went overboard with all the symbolism and like, as they should!

[image description: first image is the cover of the light novel No. 6, displaying two boys standing against a dystopian city surrounded by a giant wall. The boy in the background is light skinned and tall with a blue ponytail, a tattered cloak and leather jacket. The boy in the front is shorter, has pale skin and red eyes, white hair and a red stripe winding around his neck and face. He is wearing a long jacket. Second image is the cover for the second volume of the manga with the same two boys in a manga art style with a beehive looking building transparent in the background. End image id]

:)

[rubixfox-fanblog]

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: General audience

Fandom: Apex Legends

Characters: Seer, Octane and Mirage. (and other legends.)

Additional tags: Seer Out of character

Words: 2864

Summary: Octane accidentally revives Seer with stim, instead of the regular syringes they normally use, and Mirage has to deal with both of them.

Notes: finally managed to finished my fanfic and gathered the courage to post it.... Enjoy!

Tumblr note: I got my inspiration from @sweetsoftandscared. You should definitely check them out!

"This is one of the worst ideas you had since the start of this match, Silva."

"Come on Amigo, that entire sneaky stuff got me bored. Even perfect boy here almost fell asleep. We all need some action."

"Speak for yourself, I was having the time of my life!"

~~~

Seer, Octane and Mirage ended up together as a squad in the dropship. Heaven knows why. It's a squad based on the amount of disaster, instead of skill, these three would bring. Especially octane and Seer, those two definitely had a history together. But no one knows (yet) why, Well Rampart definitely knew but she wouldn't tell anyone about them.

Their battle location this time was in Olympus and their dropship flew in at the Bonsai Plasa. Seer was the one who took the lead as jumpmaster and made sure he landed at the Oasis. Everyone else already jumped earlier or later so they got all of the world to loot or observe the area.

That's where it all went wrong.

After a few minutes of gathering guns and supplies, Octane got bored (like always.) and decided to take his own lead, running off to the place where small houses gathered, the place called estates.

Seer tried to stop him, because he noticed the heartbeats of at least 3 other legends. But Octane being octane, he didn't listen at all. Throwing his jump pad in front of the other two legends, who were chasing him, launching them both,unexpectedly, in the middle of a heated battle.

Two squads

Two whole squads.... Well basically one and a half, since there was only one of the three left. So that makes one and a third. I wait, one squad. (they downed the last one while they landed)

The three legends of the remaining squad seemed to be Revenant, Wraith and Loba. Who Already noticed them as they landed on top of the middle building.

~~~

"How about you two just quit whining and just go for it already, if we keep standing still we'll be dead in no time!" Octane responded as he bounces up and down.

A deep, disappointed, sigh escaped Seer's mouth as he pulled out his gun.

"I stay here. Mirage, create distraction but watch out for Revenant. Octane, do what you want." Seer didn't seem to try to give Octane instructions, he just let him wreck havoc so he could focus on his enemy's in front of him.

As they both took off and followed orders, Seer released his tactical called: focus of attention. The micro stones formed a tunnel straight into the building in front of him, revealing two of the three enemies they're about to fight.

Wait, two?

His slight distraction caused his downfall as he didn't notice that Loba used her jump drive. Her bracelet flew straight above his head and ended up behind him.

"I'm sorry, my love. But I really need to win this match. That tin Demon out there promised me that I could kick off his head if we win." Loba said and the moment Seer tried to turn around she already shot him a few times in the chest.

But Loba's action didn't go unnoticed because as soon as she downed Seer, she received a few bullets as well from Mirage, standing on top of the roof from the other building Seer focused his attention on.

"You're welcome." Mirage yelled.

"I downed Wraith, she was too slow for me to escape." Octane cackled as he returned from god knows where.

Revenant was the only one left.

Seer made his way down towards the ground, hoping Mirage would pick him up but at that very moment, Revenant's Tactical landed exactly where Seer ended up, underneath the stacked buildings.

Also Mirage apparently got hit as they heard the cracking sound.

"You gotta help him, Octane. I'll cause a distraction.". irage announced. He didn't get hit by the tactical bomb yet so his abilities still worked. Making sure Revenant would focus on him and his 7 other decoys.

Octane didn't hesitate and quickly grabbed one of his revive needles and stabbed directly into Seer's chest.

Wait a second.

Why did that needle say Simulacrum? Did he accidentally swapped the needles this morning? Was that the reason why Lifeline said he looked Healthier than before? So many questions, such a little time.

"I could use a little help here!" Mirage cried out, who's struggling not to get hit by Revenant's Longbow. Who's hiding in one of the houses behind them.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm com....."

Boom

A clean shot between the eyes ending Revenant's life in an instant.

"What in the name of..."

Did another squad that joined the fight? No, nobody was there except the three of them.

"What's wrong?" Seer said, holding a 301 assault rifle in his right hand, without a scope nonetheless while his left hand still got a hold of one of Octane's hands, pulling the downed man back on his feet.

"Did you just shoot him?" Mirage said.

"Why, yes. You needed some help right? So I provided that help."

Octane tried to pry Seer's hand open, but the taller man was holding it fiercely for somehow no reason.

"Amigo, please, let go of my hand. I don't think Che would be happy if I lost my hand as well. " He said, not paying attention to the kill at all.

Seer spaced out for a few seconds, staring directly at Mirage. Poor Eliot started to back up in response as he felt really uncomfortable right now.

Until he suddenly snapped back to reality and pulled away from Octane's hand. Then he decided to turn around and just started to run?

"The next ring is not far." Seer started. "Come, let's go."

Octane caressed his hand like it's been stuck in a bear trap and raised an eyebrow, underneath his goggles of course, as he watched his teammate run forward. Did the stim give him super sight? Or did it give him super focus? Whatever it was, Octane became jealous.

"What did you do?" Mirage suddenly asked , like he could see Octane's expression under his mask. "There's no way a normal human being could hit someone at that distance."

"I guess it's just luck, Amigo. Something you could use as well." Octavio clearly avoided the question. "Like he said, The ring's coming, try to keep up as well, 'kay?" He said and the another jump pad to catch up with Seer

"Wait, what?" Mirage said confused as he turned around and noticed the red wall of death coming up to him very quickly.

"Don't go without me!"

They finally managed to catch up with Seer, who stopped moving for a second, close at the Hammond labs. He rubbed his temple as he looked at Octane.

"You used the wrong syringe, did you now?" He suddenly said.

"Are you alright, Amigo?"

Seer didn't hesitate for a second and pointed his R301 directly at Mirage, who ducked away in an instant, just to shoot a legend who sneaked up behind him.

"I'm fine, totally. Nothing wrong with me at all." he quickly added and refused to continue at what he just asked. He didn't have the concentration at all to be mad at Octane right now.

"Dude! Watch out where you point that thing!" Mirage said, almost screaming as he panicked. "don't ever do that..."

Seer pushed his index fingers to his lips as an indication for Mirage to shut up.

"The two remaining legends are still on the other side of the wall. I'm going in." The taller Brown man didn't even wait for one then to make the first move, he just took off.... Again.

"phew." Octane let out a relieved sigh. Ignoring Mirage, who clearly looked at him like he saw water burning. "Let's go, we can't let him die alone."

By the time they catch up again, Seer was kneeling down by one the deathboxes, looting some ammo. Two innocent legends, slaughtered brutally by the new guy on drugs. Sounds like headline for the Outlands newspaper

"How even.... We weren't even gone for at least 5 minutes." Mirage said. "Octane, what did you do?"

"It was an accident, Amigo. Are you happy now? Lifeline and I had a drink together yesterday, probably one too much. I accidentally swapped the syringes this morning cause I couldn't think right." He finally confessed because he couldn't handle Mirage's annoying attitude anymore.

"Are there any side effects?"

"depends, want to hear the bad or the worst once?"

"The good once please"

"Side effects aren't really good at all, Compadre. It'll wear off after a while. Probably gonna take a few days but the most common side effect is not being able to sleep or concentrate, cause you know,.. It makes you feel energetic." Octane looked at Seer who's been looking at them both for a while now, moving his fingers rapidly up and down.

-The poor guy won't be able to sleep for the upcoming days.- Octane wanted to say, but he didn't because he knew Mirage probably wouldn't be able to stop talking if he had an antidote for the poison Octane pumped in the always so calm and concentrated Seer.

"Are you both good? There are 10 squad left. Let's go." Seer couldn't even think right at this very moment as the

stim probably reached its peak at this point.

"c'mon, we need to go. Before it wears off, better take the advance now we still can." Octane said.

"Does that mean I can get a kill too?"

"If you're fast enough, Amigo!" Octane said and took the lead this time. Mirage sighed, if only he was as fast as them. His legs were making him tired, trying to keep up with those two junkies.

-This feels wrong.- That's all Mirage could think of right now.

The ring chased them all the way back to the rift. The third round had been announced and the timer went down rapidly, close to round 4. On their way to the ring they took another squad down, but none of them seemed to be the kill leader. Somehow....

Seer got the most kills, logical right? He took down thirteen people. Octane got second place with 8 and mirage.... Yeah, he didn't even bother trying to keep up with those two anymore. He didn't even take the Stim, but he was already worn out mainly because of the constant sprinting. He even burned his butt on the ring because Seer and Octane pushed a squad on the edge of the closing ring.

"Only 2 enemy squads left.... Victory is nearly ours." Seer said as Octane used his Jump Pad to take both Mirage and Seer to the upper parts of the Rift. Being this high gave them the advantage to examine their upcoming enemies.

Besides Mirage acquired a fully upgraded Longbow, so he could see their enemies from at least 300 meters away. But the main reason he was using the Longbow, is because he could still keep an eye on both of his Teammates without moving a lot.

The drugs enhanced Seer's abilities greatly. His ears picked up the sounds of heartbeats even faster and his micro drones reached a distance even further than before. It almost felt like cheating. (Well it definitely was though, none of the legends were allowed to take any drugs, except for Octane, because you know, it's Octane.)

"6 enemies, North, not too far away, currently fighting each other." Mirage said as he loaded the Longbow, ready to Shoot one of them, while standing on top of the building.

Seer peaked through the scope of his R-301, Following the movement of what it seemed to be, Fuse. Who launched his knuckle cluster at one of the other legends he's been fighting.

"Let's go! It's not like they're going to commit suicide!" Octane exclaimed, injecting himself with the 40st syringe of Stim today. He threw his jump pad down in front of himself and used it to launch himself into battle.

4 legends closer to victory. Mirage wanted this to be over, this entire match pushed him to his limits. He doesn't care that he only had 2 kills, well of course he did, but he pushed that away for now.

Seer released his micro drones mid air, after he also used Octane's jump pad of course, to reveal the remaining enemies. Just before he landed, Octane already downed the last one of the other squad Fuse and his team were fighting.

"Knuckle cluster f'ring."

It struck Octane from behind and it stuck long enough to break Octane's shield.

"Shit." Octane growled. Seer heard his teammate being in trouble and quickly focused his attention on Fuse, who seemed to be amused and proud by his actions.

While Octane was trying to recharge his shield behind a MRVN, currently at top on one of the buildings from the Rift, Mirage noticed one of Fuse's teammates, down at the ground, tried to flank Octane.

Bloodhound, Mirage noticed, they only have to scan their area and they would be faster at Octane than mirage ever would be. So the man sighed and decided to take a gamble. First he shot Bloodhound, clearly cracking their shield, and after that he jumped in as well.

Bloodhound quickly turned around, trying to find the one responsible for their cracked shield. But before they took action, Mirage landed behind them. Not exactly behind but 50 meter away.

He tried to regain his balance, but....

"Alfather, give me sight! " Bloodhound suddenly said and turned around to notice Mirage's clumsy landing. Their eyes glowing red and quickly started shooting at the poor soul.

Mirage whimpered, trying to remain his cool, but he couldn't, every bullet he fired ended up in the gutter. But Bloodhound's bullets hit him one for one, almost knocking him. Luckily Octane finally finished up charging his shield and attacked Bloodhound upstairs. Delivering the final blow.

"Be careful where you walk, Amigo!" Octane yelled and threw a Phoenix kit towards the older man.

Seer seemed to have a hard time against Fuse. His quick reflexes suddenly turned slow and he barely found the energy to keep himself on his feet. Fuse took advantage of that, he swiftly moved out of the cover and readied an Arc star on his robot arm. Ready to shoot, but Seer just got enough power to release, his fast loading tactical and the micro drives escaped out of his chest device once again, canceling fuse abilities for a few seconds. Confusing the older men for a second as his arm wouldn't work

Seer's bullet struck Fuse right at his chest , to end the longest battle he had today. Then he collapsed.

"Is he dead?" Mirage boldly asked.

"Of course not, are you crazy, Compadre. " Octane muttered. "He probably fell asleep or something...."

"We have our Champion's!"

It seemed that Fuse and Bloodhound lost a teammate before the last ring closed, so they were unable to revive him or her.

"This was the weirdest match ever. I'm glad it's over..." Mirage sounded worried, and he has enough reasons to be worried. This was Obi's second match in the Apex game and recovering would surely be a drag.

"Come on Compadre, we won! Be happy!" Octane howled and quickly started to jump around.

--------

"So, Silva caused all of this, Huh. It was mu'h fault, i should've keep an better eye on him." Che rubbed her temple as she plays with a pen in her other hand.

After the games ended, Lifeline got called in to pick up Obi's lifeless body and brought him to the hospice on the drop ship.

"It isn't your fault, Aya. I was with him at the match, I should have stopped him earlier. Obi's going to be alright, right?* Mirage replied, standing next to Lifeline, who's scribbling some notes on her note pad about Seer's condition.

"He's going to f'ne. The only problem is that it would take weeks for him to r'cover. I mean, he can easily compete to the games again in just a f'w days. Stim is one h'll of a drug, if you ain't used to it, the side effects of it are terrible. He would still feel energetic but his stamina won't be able to deal with it, think of headaches, being tired all of the time, that surt stuff. He won't be happy when he wakes up."

"I see..." Elliot mumbled.

"Silva is at the Paradise lounge. Yuh should go there as well. Celebrating yuh win and all." Lifeline added. "I can't come, I need to keep an eye on the artist, yuh know."

Mirage wanted to ask if Che was coming too but she already answered his thoughts.

"Are you sure?" He asked to make sure he understood it right.

"Definitely! Now go, Witt. Obi will be alright as long he's in muh hands."

And so Mirage did. Without a doubt lifeline's care was the best of the outlands and Seer will recover as fast as possible. Ready to Lecture Octane about his wrongdoings. (or to kick his ass, just to show how disappointed he was.)

[avungerthatgotaway]

Baby it's the Sign of the Times

Eyoo guyzz! This is a new oneshot, I hope you like this❄ I'm currently rewriting my Hawkeye fic, so I'm not gonna post that one for a little. This one is a bit longer than my previous ones.

I totally recommend you to listen to this song while reading, even if you're not a fan of Harry's. It will really help the mood.

I don't own anything, even tho I'd like to have a few... choice words with Russo brothers about endgame...👍🏼🤔

Warnings: none

Summary: events when Peggy dies, mainly before Steve goes to London, and you comfort him. (I know it's stupid summary, but I don't want to spoil it, sorry)

Genre: angst

I don't mention civil war at all. No other avengers are at Peggy's funeral. There are no romantical pairings, and Sharon is not mentioned cuz she doesn't fit in the storylineeee.

----------------------------

She's gone.

In her sleep.

This words crushed Steve inside. He knew this was coming, but he'd never be ready for it, no matter what.

When he came from ice, he met her again. He knew they could never be together. No matter his actual age, Steve still had a full life in front of him. Unfortunately, same couldn't be told for Peggy.

Oh Peggy... She was always his ray of sunshine. Even through darkest of days. It is a cliché, but she was.

Was.

She is gone now.

Why did she have to go? Why didn't he get to spend a life with her? Steve's biggest wish was, and always will be, to spend a happy life with her. He didn't want any of this famous captain shit. He wanted a house in a village and 2 kids with Peggy. And a little dog. Or they'd be of service, and fight next to each other. Nevermind, Steve wanted a life with Peggy. For them to watch each other go grey. Maybe he could've been there for her as a husband now, through her sickness. Or maybe he'd be the one to go first. But still, that'd be a life...

One tear slipped down his rosy cheek, the other one following. Soon he had tearstains on his cheeks, but he didn't care. It was a silent cry. Those carry the most pain.

"Eyo, capsicle! You good there?" Tony snapped him outta his thoughts. Steve forgot the whole team was in the room. Fortunately, he was turned, so they were facing his back. He just couldn't talk to anyone right now.

"Yea yea, I'm good. I gotta go." he quickly got up and exited the room. He climbed up the stairs 2 more floors, but his toughts started haunting him again.

He's going on a plane tomorrow morning to say goodbye for the last time. Oh God, even thinking of a last time kills Steve inside. It's pretty late, but he didn't know what to do until morning. Sleeping wasn't an option, he knew that much. He gave in to overthinking again.

Of Peggy. Of her life. Of what could've happened if he didn't freeze...

"Just stop your crying, it's a sign of the times..."

"...welcome to the final show..."

"...I hope you're wearing your best clothes..."

Steve heard a silent piano in the background, and he heard an angelic voice. He still had tearstained cheeks, but he needed to hear what the voice had to say.

"...you can't bribe the door on your way to the sky..."

He was still clutching his cellphone in his hand, while following the voice. He came in front of Y/N's room. Y/N was a 16 year old avenger. She was very mature and wise for her age.

Her door was opened, and he just leaned against the doorframe, listening to her beautiful voice.

"...if we never learn, we been here before..."

"... why are we always stuck and running from the bullets..."

"...they told me that the end is near..."

Steve was crying a river at this point, and he didn't care. First shock was wearing out, and silent cries became little sobs. Yet, not loud enough for Y/N to hear.

"...just stop your crying, baby it'll be alright..."

"...we got to get away..."

She played final chords on piano, and then she turned around.

2nd person POV

You were singing "Sign of the times" and playing your piano. You loved this song. It was helping you relax, the melody was perfect. During the few last, silent piano chords, you tought you heard something. You softly finished and turned around. It was Steve.

But not the Steve you knew. This one had red puffy eyes, swollen from crying. He was sobbing quietly, trying to stop the sobs, but he couldn't.

You slowly came up to him, like to a wounded animal. He was just so hurt, you could see it in his eyes. You felt bad for him, but you wanted to know what happened. Who could hurt Stevie so badly.

"What happened, Big Guy?" you asked him. Steve just kept on sobbing even harder.

You moved him a little, so he was in your room, and you closed the door. You lead him to your bed, and sit on it, next to him. He was clutching his phone tightly in his hand, so you lifted his hand and gently tried to take it. He wouldn't let it go. You don't wanna pressure him, but whatever is on that phone is causing him this much distress.

"Stevie, cmon big babe" you cooed and rubbed the back of his hand with your thumbs. It may sound strange so someone, but Stevie really was like a big baby, so fluffy and vunerable inside.

He gave in and the phone just slipped from his hand in yours. You read the text and everyting was clear right away. You knew he went to visit Peggy in hospital, you didn't know she was this bad. I mean, Steve and you were close, but still that's too personal. You felt sooo sorry for him. He didn't deserve it. Not now. Not ever.

"Ohh, I'm so sorry Stevie..."

You immidiately hugged him close to you. He burried his head in your shoulder and neck, crying his eyes out, but at the same time trying not to cry. At least not to sob.

"Stevie, bear, it's okay to cry. Just let it all out."

That was all he needed. He started crying and sobbing uncontrollably, and your shirt was soaked in his tears. You didn't mind it tho, if it'll help him to feel better afterwards, he can cry as much as he needs.

After some time he lifted his head and looked into your eyes with his puffy baby blues.

"I'm sorry, Flower, I-I ju-ust can't believe s-s-she's go-one-e" he was still crying. You could see how much Peggy meant to him. You hugged him again, tugging at his hair softly to comfort him.

"Hey, hey no need to apologise Stevie. You cry yourself out, it'll help you. I'm here for you, Bear."

"T-tha-ank you. A-and and please... ca-can you-u not tell a-anyone about he-er ye-et..."

"Shhhh, Bear, I won't tell anyone about her. You wait until you're ready." you whispered.

You understood him. Not everyone in the team knew Peggy existed. And now telling them that she died, and what happened with them would be too much for Steve.

"T-thanks"

"Shhh, it's okay, it's okay." you whispered. You whispered to soothe him, you didn't know what to do when someone's loved one dies. But you wanted to be there for Steve so badly. Little did you know that what you did was just perfect for Steve.

-

Steve at first felt ashamed, because he cried in front of Y/N. But she talked just enough, whispering soothingly. He didn't have streinght to act like a big guy anymore. He craved comfort so badly, and he got it from Y/N. It felt nice.

-

Back to 2nd person POV

Something was bothering you. Steve didn't want anyone to know about Peggy's death which meant he was probably going to funeral alone. You didn't want that for him. At least he needed someone to be with afterwards. You knew Steve and how sensitive he was. You didn't want to think of things going through his head while he's alone after funeral. But if it was in London, as you tought it was, you had a plan.

"Stevie?" you said quietly playing with his hair a little.

"Mhm?" he asked, face still in your shoulder.

"When is Peggy's funeral? Is anyone going with you?" you asked. He lifted his head a little.

"T-tomorrow. L-london. And no. It's too much-h t-trouble for anyone. And I know it is Y/N, do-don't try to o--object" he smiled through his tears. You smiled back at him, your own eyes glistening with tears a little, but you didn't want him to notice.

He burried his head in your shoulder and neck again, like it was his safeplace, and he just cried. You couldn't imagine where those tears come from.

You softly stroked his short blonde locks, and started singing.

"Just stop your crying, it's the sign of the times...

...welcome to the final show

...I hope you're wearing your best clothes..."

Half into the song, you felt more weight on your shoulder. You looked down, and realised Steve fell asleep. You pressed one kiss to his temple, and moved him, so he was lying in your bed.

"Good night, Stevie Bear." you whispered.

-

When you exited your room quietly, you immediately called your best friend, Jon.

It was 2am, but you and Jon were just the best friends, you could call him whenever, and other way around.

Him and his family were going to London, and he invited you to go with them. You declined the offer, because you had to study so. so. much. But this was way more important.

"Heey, Jonny. Is that London offer still on?

Great. When are you going?

Ohhh, in 2 hours?

Yea, I'll be there. Thanks

And by the way, I'll have somewhere to go to tomorrow, around 4pm, I hope you guys don't mind.

Ohh cool. Thank you bruhhhh. Byee"

Great news. They still had a plain ticked to spare, and they'll pick you up soon.

You quickly packed your stuff, careful not to wake up Stevie. Poor baby. With everything he's been through, and now his Peggy dies...

You tell JARVIS to tell Tony you're in your friends house, and to wake up Steve 'round 6am. His flight was in 7. You knew this, and which Church it was in at what time because you did a little research. Aka, asked JARVIS for help. AI already heard everything, so it wasn't news.

You left the tower and went to meet up with Jon and his family.

-

Steve woke up by alarm ringing at 6am. He immediately realised he's not in his room. He was in Y/N's. And then he remembered how you comforted him. He was so thankful for you. Even though, you weren't here, and it was confusing. You probably went to sleep on the couch, or in some other room, and Steve felt bad about it. He quickly got ready, and tried to find you, so he could get you back to your bed. Fortunately JARVIS easened his search.

"Mr. Rogers, ms. L/N went on a trip with her friend a few hours ago."

"Oh. Thanks JARVIS." Steve said, and left the building. You didn't mention any trips, but then again, you two didn't talk anything except Peggy tonight.

-

(timeskip to Peggy's funeral, cuz no one wants to listen about the trip now)

-

3rd person POV

It's so devastating to attend a funeral on your own.

Even more so if it's a funeral of your lost loved one.

Maybe Steve should've brought someone with him. For comfort. At least to feel the familiar presence. He carried Peggy's coffin, and it was enough to make him feel empty and sad. It was nearing to the end of funeral, and Steve didn't want to be alone. He wanted comfort. Like when Y/N comforted him last night.

After the ceremony ended, he stayed behind a little. He craved someone's presence. Anyone familiar. And then he felt a smal hand on his shoulder. He turned around, and it was Y/N. At first, he tought he was hallucinating. But her petite hand on his shoulder felt so real. He felt so grateful for this small human being at the moment, he just wanted to thank God over and over for having her with him.

"Y/N, Flower, what are you doing here?" he asked, still in shock.

"Hey Bear. I figured out you could use some company after the funeral. But if you wanna be alone, I understand, I'll go."

"No no, I mean, if you can stay, it would mean a world to me. You really know me better than I know myself sometimes Y/N. Thank you so much, Flower." he said, and immediately came for a hug. You hugged back, of course.

"I'll stay for as long as you want, Bear. I'm here for you, as long as you want me to stay."

"I want you to stay forever kiddo" he mumbed in your hair.

"Forever it is."

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