#i'll actually point that out a little bt in the next part

[louismygf]

just recently watched this is us with my college friends

[ladysomething]

Hi maddie, do you mind expanding on what you mean when you say you took a couple of wrong steps/the future wygig chapters ended going on the wrong direction? (If you want to). Not digging for information or anything, just curious :) i love seeing the bts of the writing process on long fics like wygig, especially as a non-writer 😁

for sure, though I fear it's going to sound very convoluted because I can't talk about specifics haha.

but basically ...

that was an incident in chapter 30 that I skipped writing because I was like ... I'm not sure how I want this to go, so I'll just move on to keep the train moving.

huge mistake, because I wrote 10k (ch 31, and part of ch 32) without the context of that scene. then I went back to write it and when I wrote it I was like holy shit ..... this changes everything about ch 31 and 32 actually.

so I panicked, sent @saiyanwitcher 5 voice messages totalling approx 20 minutes having a meltdown being like "I don't know what to do, because I've written all this stuff that doesn't really fit anymore, so I guess this is my solution??"

my solution included shifting the contents of ch 32 to another race weekend, taking the beginning of ch 32 and putting it in ... 30 I think it was? or maybe 31? and then trying to readjust around that.

then I went to sleep, she woke up, listened to my meltdown, read over the entirety of what's drafted (40k and 6 chapters) and was like yeah Maddie .... imo we've got more issues than just this, and this is my solution.

bless her, because I was so panicked I wasn't really thinking clearly lmao.

she said that there was a whole chunk of ch 27 (yes 27, way before even my point of 'oh fuck this has gone wrong') that didn't fit. I, unfortunately, agreed with her, which meant that whole section got cut, so I've been rewriting ch 27 this week too.

then we agreed that ch 31 should actually be the new ch 28, because it's a very low stakes drama that was dragged out for too long and was wedged in between two much more important chapters. so for pacing, it's been moved earlier, but of course bc it was originally 31 it has vastly different context so it needs to be rewritten a little bit too.

I pulled something out of the new ch 29, so now it needs more scenes so that it's not only 6k.

the new 30, GOD BLESS THE NEW 30, is actually totally fine.

the new 31 ..... well. because that was the original 30 (the one with the initial drama that I skipped writing) ... it needs ... work. to bring it to a good place. I also didn't close that chapter off because as I was writing the concluding scene was when I realised hey I've fucked up really badly, and I stopped writing. so it needs an ending.

and then finally ... ch 32 .... well. I stopped writing anything additional there, too, because I realised I needed to fix everything before it before I could keep moving ahead.

so ... yeah... that's the story of how the next 6 chapters aren't finished and are in the process of being entirely reordered/rewritten.

[captain-joongz]

thank you so much for the tag @shadowkoo! it's such an interesting idea and i loved delving into my blog in this way <3

i've only been writing on here for a little less than a year, but i'm so damn grateful for the lovely community that opened their arms to me, and loved on my works and made me feel accepted.

i struggled a lot in this year and the one before, mainly because i felt super burnt out and like i trapped myself in a situation where i felt unmotivated. starting to write was my escape and my attempt to bring back some creativity and joy to my life, and it worked out better than i could have hoped for!

so thank you, for an amazing year that i truly enjoyed more than the last few all thanks to having a creative outlet here! <3

and thank you for leaving so much lovely feedback on my blog, i truly couldn't have asked for better readers!

the first fic i actually posted on my blog was Heroes, which was posted almost whole six months before i truly became active on here!

the first official fic that started off this blog then became Abraxas ch.1, which was posted on 16th of February, a day after my birthday!

number of fics posted : 7 one-shots, 8 chapters across 3 series, 18 drabbles during the hard hours

together that makes almost 225k words total!

number of fics in progress : 7 new fics + 3 new chapters

Tits out

Wooyoung x reader, bffs2l, college au, smut | 7k words

posted: March 3rd

this was my first one-shot posted, and the rush of adrenaline i felt when i woke up the next day and there was 99+ icon on my activity was indescribable. I'll never forget breaking my first 1000 notes on my first fic and getting my first comments!

thank you so much, everyone <3

Deserve you

Seonghwa x reader, brother-in-law!Hwa, wedding night au, pure angsty porn | 18.5k words

posted: July 17th

I remember working on this fic relentlessly and being so proud of it! I had a major break-down in April and left school, and wasn't writing for some time because i wasn't in the mental space to, and this was the first thing i poured my heart into when i got back into my fics. the idea has been stewing in my mind for months at that point, and i felt so fulfilled finally putting it out!

thank you to everyone who loved this fic and lost their minds to me about it, i loved watching your reactions more than anything!

Dragonheart

OT7!BTS x reader, dragon au, dragon-rider au, high fantasy | currently sits at 36k words

first posted: July 9th (the masterlist) | August 14th (the first chapter)

My first OT7 project! I love dragons so much, and having the chance to write about them is such a passion of mine! i have so much in store for this story, so much to unfold and such a journey to take, all the while making this a love song to the mythical creatures I've always been obsessed with and to the seven boys who helped me stay sane!

and of course, to you my readers, who supported this series and have endless patience with me while i write new chapters for you!

According to my AO3 stats, the favourites are vastly different on there than they are here!

On my account there, the favourites are as follows :

1.Dragonheart

2.A little show

Yoongi x reader, college au, s2l, fluffy smut | 9.6k words

posted: April 21st

3.Tits out

4.Deserve you

5.Cinderella

Yoongi x reader x Hoseok, club owners au, s2l, smut | 19.7k words

posted: September 17th

Abraxas, ch.2

Yoongi x reader, mob boss au, police officer au, investigative, crime | the series currently sits at 78k words

this chapter has over 39k words, and it's the longest I've ever written - it even had to be split up into two parts for the ease of reading!

Penny for your ghosts, ch.2

OT7!BTS x reader, hybrid au, supernatural au, ghost hunting au | this series currently sits at almost 20k words

i posted this chapter after months of not being active, on the 24th of December, like a little present for all my patient darlings!

Deserve you

Seonghwa x reader, brother-in-law!Hwa, wedding night au, pure angsty porn | 18.5k words

posted: July 17th

As i said before, i do have quite the soft spot for this fic, and it's very close to my heart, but i do genuinely think that this is some of my best writing, and i re-read it occasionally haha. i feel that this was some of my most creative time, and i wrote this fic with an ease, as if the words just wanted to come out and i was simply their medium. though Tits out is definitely up there too!

i've been periodically putting out fic recs and talked about my favourite fics, so if you're interested, check out my library!

otherwise, the few absolute favourites that i'd choose would be these:

Ugh, as if! by @ennysbookstore (khj x reader)

Look after you by @mingigoo (khj x reader)

Plug & Play by @bangtanintotheroom (khj x reader)

we can't be friends by @jensthwa (cs x reader)

obliviate me by @bvidzsoo (psh x reader)

home for the holidays by @highvern (jwy x reader)

Masked miracles by @remedyx (bts x reader)

Trouvaille by @spookyserenades (bts x reader)

fast lane by @yminie (ksj x reader)

fail-safe by @jiminrings (myg x reader)

love roulette by @whatifyoulivelikethat (myg x reader)

strike a chord by @snackhobi (myg x reader)

Illicit favours by @yoongiofmine (myg x reader)

petty by @hamsterclaw (jjk x reader)

package deal by @hoseokhasmyheartxx (myg x reader x jhs)

Sex & Candy by Marcy Playground

Nothing Matters by The Last Dinner Party

Too Sweet by Hozier

Dis-ease by BTS

Wonderful Nothing by Glass Animals

Love Again by Dua Lipa

Come back to me by RM

Set Me Free pt.2 by Jimin

So Beautiful by DPR Ian

D-Day by Agust D

Peanut Butter & Tears by DPR Ian

UGH! by BTS

La Bohéme by Charles Aznavour

Light My Love by Greta van Fleet

Run BTS by BTS

to get back into writing, as i will have more free time, to finish the requests that i've gotten and haven't found the time to write, to pour my heart into updating the series i've started

to experiment more with my writing and my genres and try something new

to post a Halloween fic that i didn't have time to write for this year's Halloween

to turn cherry-yoongs from a side-project into a fully functioning fic library/review blog

to continue growing and to never lose the spark for writing <3

and here we are! the end <3 this was super fun to make, and i loved sharing this with you, so thank you once again to Raven, who tagged me in hers!

i hope that whatever comes to us in 2025, we'll make the year our own and continue soaring even higher into the sky ����🥂

and also special thanks to my three anonies ✨💋🪷, thank you for reaching out and hanging out!

tagging (if you feel like it, if not, definitely don't feel pressured into making this <3) :

@spookyserenades @remedyx @potatomountain + anyone else who sees this and feels inspired to make one!

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Visuals - Be Prepared

Voiceplay's full-length cover of Be Prepared was released on the 28th of September (or the 27th depending on your timezone, same deal as always), and in fact it's still the 28th for me as I type this! Yes, I'm getting this ready at least a couple of days in advance of when I plan to post it, 1 because I've waited long enough already, and 2 because VoicePlay's next release (their Halloween video) is meant to drop on Patreon before the end of September and I wanna get this done before it happens!

Anyway, this features Mykal Kilgore, who's an OG member, not technically of VoicePlay, but of "4 The Love", which consisted of Mykal, Geoff, Layne, and Earl, back when they were about 17 I believe? Then at some point they added Scott Porter as a beatbooxer and became 4:2:Five. Mykal appeared a little bit in Just Sing, but otherwise this is the first time he's properly reunited with Geoff and Layne and gotten to meet Eli and Cesar! He was definitely a great contribution to this video.

There's a lot to unpack visually in this video, and again, I've been dying to make this post, so let's! get! into this!!!

Honestly I can't even think of much to say about the overall set design right now other than yoooooo look how cool this is!!

They absolutely nailed the vibe/aesthetic of the original scene, while still keeping the set "simple" enough for plenty of movement and use of space!

Layne was in charge of the arrangement, creative direction, and video editing for this video, shocker to no one (a Disney song cover that places Geoff front and centre? Gotta be Layne's doing 😂 (and we love him for it!))

Oh yeah also I'm pretty sure the aspect ratio is a bit "narrower" than it often is for most VP videos? (Like the screen is more noticeably wider than it is tall.)

There he is!!! (It was at this point on my first watch-through that I had to take a moment to steel myself because I was like "nope nope nope hang on wait I don't think I'm actually prepared for this" 😅

As to be expected, Eli is credited with lighting, but he also helped out with the fog machine things shown here in this image (the one on the left is more visible here). VoicePlay hadn't worked with these things before, but they worked amazingly, and it's another thing to give the video similarities to the original movie scene. However, these things were actually Quite Loud

Not the clearest image but look at Layne and Cesar being all sneaky/creepy here! (Layne does a little skip-step thing in this shot here that's brief but kinda reminds me just a touch of his little run in This Is Halloween)

Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Rick Underwood the man that you are, please, let me shake your hand, I love you (whether I'll still love him after the Halloween video remains to be determined, but anyway)

I mean honestly this is a Whole Look and I adore every part of it. The "facial scruff", the eyeliner, the freaking awesome jacket, the hair... I'm gonna stop myself from rambling too much too early ^^;

"I know that your powers of retention... are as wet as a warthog's backside."

A couple of things here:

1, You would probably expect Layne to just be another hyena (after all, there's many more than just Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed in the original scene), but it's possible that he might have intended to be a warthog, given this moment here (and also at the end of the BTS there's a clip of Layne messing around with one of the smoke/fog machines in a very Pumbaa-esque manner, lol).

And 2, credit to @ambular-d who first noticed this and pointed it out in the Discord server: Layne dips his shoulder here, "like Geoff's casual disdainful little swipe has some strength behind it." (directly quoting them here)

Okay now let's pay attention (ayyy) to our "main hyena trio" for a moment

There is no real style coordination here and yet somehow it works (well they're all in black/dark grey so they've got that in common). But like Cesar's got a grey leopard-print jumper/sweater (kinda cute ngl), Mykal's got a black fluffy (fringed?) shirt/sweater thing, and Eli's got a black leather jacket on (he looks very cool in it though - definitely suits him)

Mykal's the only one of the total five who isn't wearing some sort of necklace, but I guess he makes up for it with the bones hanging from the top of his head (and for all I know that actually might be a necklace that he just wrapped around the base of his hairbun)

ALSO I just went to go check my post for Friends On The Other Side because I was wondering if Cesar's necklace here was one of the ones worn by Geoff or Layne in that video, and I don't think it is (too short), but I'm 90% certain that Eli's necklace here is one of the same ones that Geoff was wearing!

Dramatic lighting flash! Low-key similar to Hoist The Colours (another video featuring scruff, guyliner, and heavily colour-tinted lighting), and also Geoff's recent Song Of Durin video!

(Also man I'm gonna hit image limit aren't I, lol rip)

"It's clear from your vacant expressions, the lights are not all on upstairs"

It's a blurry image, but I couldn't help but be tempted to do a Screenshot Comparison for this moment (plus another one a bit later in the song) because Layne absolutely understood the assignment and I was quite pleased that this bit got recreated!

(Also yes, Cesar is Ed, lol)

This moment in the video with Geoff and Cesar (including the second half of the line) got turned into a meme gif on the Patrons Discord server to represent VoicePlay and the audio distributors that they've been having issues with 😂

"And where do we feature?" "Just listen to teacher"

I don't remember it looking like that in the original scene! 😝 (but seriously, I love how Geoff and Cesar can't help but be cute together here - you should see their dynamic in some of the BTS videos, it's the best)

Pfft, this moment also got memed in the Discord server XD ("ask me to sing a G-1 one more time!" (credit again to @ambular-d) or alternatively "I said there are ants in the coffee again!" (that one's a reference to one of the BTS videos))

I'm honestly a little jealous of how cool Geoff looks while doing the sort of lifting motion he does in this moment here

Oh yeah that's definitely one of the Friends On The Other Side necklaces that Eli's got on

Also it took me an embarassingly-large amount of watches to realize that Cesar had painted nails for this one (in my defence, I was very distracted 😂)

Sure go ahead Eli, have your moment, stare into my soul, go on (affectionate)

"Of course quid pro quo you're expected, to take Certain Duties on board"

Again, not a great screenshot, but again, another moment recreated (at least in a general sense) from the original scene!

This is also a good place to point out how the lighting has changed from green to yellow, just as it does in the original scene, and it changed at the same spot as well (right on or just before the "it's great that we'll soon be connected..." line)

Oh rip it is tough to get good screencaps for this one (probably at least partially due to all the fog)

Anyway I wanted to point out that Layne's a little over an inch taller than Geoff (possibly two inches if you count the hair, lol), but in this one he mostly stays at least a little hunched, at least when Geoff's next to him, making Geoff look equal height if not taller (and from a storytelling perspective, it's great!)

"YOU WON'T GET A SNIFF WITHOUT ME!"

A quick shift to red colouring, again just as the movie scene (and also now the video looks crystal clear as well!)

(Also goddamn Geoff is really working the crazy evil villain look... like man 👀)

Mykal and Eli vibing, I love it

Cesar, Mykal, and Eli's reaction to the growl/roar 😂

Cesar is shook! Literally! XD

Nothing much to say here, just that Geoff looks amazing and is amazing

(Also shoutout to his white-grey hair, which was looking wonderfully-prominent in this video and I adore it)

(woof) HELLO THERE GOOD SIR 😳👉👈

This is a rare case of me not having a "he's so pretty" moment with Geoff in a video, but that's because for this one, it's more a case of "he's so hot" 👀

*insert evil laughter here*

And that's Be Prepared! Man, what a video!

Next on the list is of course VoicePlay's Halloween release for 2024, whatever that turns out to be. I'm both excited and nervous (or scared, even), but hey, I have no doubt it will give me plenty to talk about! Until next time!

[slayerkitty]

Visual Effects in Only Friends MV part 2

The second song on the Only Friends OST dropped today; So What? by the amazing Ford Arun. Much like the first MV for Only Friends, this one is also has visual frameworks that made me stop and stare.

Just like my first post on this subject, where I talked about the late 90s/early 00s aesthetic of the show as well as controlled voyeurism (aka we only see what they want us to see), these themes show up again here, but a little differently. Unlike the Let's Try MV and the BTS vids which use multiple different effects and transitions as well as framing a lot of the scenes to look like (possibly) 90s camcorder footage, So What? has two visual effects (I think technically three, and I'll point out why I say it this way in a minute).

The first one is the camcorder footage effect. Except that it's even different from the Let's Try MV. While the Let's Try MV has the "play" prompt onscreen and time stamps, it now, to me, feels more like CCTV video than camcorder video. The video effect on So What? is definitely camcorder footage because it is time and date stamped.

Now, the time and date stamp is February 1st, 2020 at 6:06pm for every screen it appears on, which to me cannot be an accurate date/time for any of the scenes. Several of these scenes were from episodes 4, 5, 6, or potentially yet to air. Chuem drops info about Covid in episode one and in February of 2020, we were so early into the pandemic during that time that I'm not sure she would have referred to it so casually, plus with no Covid precautions being taken onscreen it does feel the show is set currently (aka 2023).

Why this date? Why 6:06pm? WHAT IS JOJO TRYING TO SAY HERE? Is this a specific reference to something upcoming on the show? Is this date famous in Thailand for something? Did he just pull a date and time out of a hat?

Onto the second effect: the yellow text on the screen is back! It was heavily used as a visual effect in episode one, and after a discussion with @ignoranaxed I did add it to my Narrative Frameworks post where I'm tracking visual effects on the show. We discussed whether or not this was an homage or reference to SKAM Norway, an extremely popular coming of age teen drama that had an amazingly done queer season (Season three. If nothing else, stop what you're doing and go watch SKAM Norway season three. You can thank me later). The show was so popular it has been remade in Spain, Italy, France, Germany (named Druck), Belgium (named WtFock), the United States and has even been announced as a Korean (BL?) drama for next year.

Is this an actual homage? I came down on the side of maybe. I can't swear it is, but I can't say it isn't. That yellow text on the screen is iconic due to SKAM Norway, and it is used in every single remake of the show (if Korea doesn't use it, I will cry. Also, if Korea doesn't release/air it in the same way, I will cry). Leaving that aside, the yellow text is in Thai, and as yet, I have no idea what it says because my subs only translated the song lyrics, not the onscreen words. If anyone who knows Thai can help me with this, I would love you forever because there's one other thing that shows up in yellow on the screen, and it's this:

WHY AN ELLIPSES, JOJO? WHAT DID IT SAY BEFORE THIS? I NEED TO KNOW WHY IT'S TRAILING OFF. IS IT TO BE CONTINUED? THE NOT KNOWING WILL DRIVE ME INSANE.

Onto the third , but maybe not really an effect: Is Ford photoshopped in here?

I ask this because if he is (and I can't quite tell but I think maybe?) then does that mean this is future footage coming up on the show? Or, like Let's Try MV did with it's extra SandRay footage in the car, was this just shot for the MV? I'm curious to see what people think on this.

Now for the rest of the MV where I just melt down because WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS DRAMA BETWEEN YO AND PLUG, JOJO? YOU CAN'T DO THIS. Also, is this Sand hugging Yo?

You can't do this to my girl. This will hurt.

Do we think this is Boston and Nick potentially going ice skating or roller skating? Because if it's roller skating, JOJO I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER.

In summary, the visual frameworks are back in play once again and what they're choosing to show and how feel important.

Tagging the ephemerality squad: @waitmyturtles, @wen-kexing-apologist, @ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @lurkingshan, @twig-tea, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, @distant-screaming

Apologies to anyone I missed. If you would liked to be tagged in my OF posts/meta, please let me know and I will add you.

[deadpool15]

Besties ?

Today is the faithful day I've been waiting for, the MAMA Awards. A part of me was terrified. This would be the first time I would be without my members, though I knew this day would come. I was always trying not to think about it. Being the only female member of the world's biggest boy group was difficult. I mean, it was hard from the start, I don't know how many people stated my position was pointless and that we would never get anywhere as a group. Though at time I did want to quit, I refused to give everyone the satisfaction of not being able to take the heat. Pretty much all my members are enlisting now.

Even Jungkook, to think we used to walk to school together and I always clung to him, at the time he couldn't stand me to be honest. He believed u was taking his spot. Now he is my best friend or older brother like the rest of BTS. "Soo, are you excited? Your first solo album has been nominated like 5 times. I heard u even got nominated for the KBS awards." I looked at jk slightly while my entire team was trying to get me ready for the night. "It's good, but weird like a good weird kook. I feel like I'm actually growing as an artist now. I mean, I love you guys, and I can't wait to perform with you again, but everyone sees me as this little girl you know. Like you were able to grow out of it, but I still have people telling me my clothes are a little too tight for my age like I'm not a grown ass woman." I say breathing in a huff, not taking in a single breath after all that. "Babes, you just turned 20. You will always be bangtans, baby. And I'll call you later to see how it goes, with you being a big host and everything." I smile and see somi walk into the room. "Is that my beautiful baby girl? Don't tell me it is. Oh my omg, is that your back? You're just letting the world see, huh? Sexyy mama." I blush at her words before my makeup team signals they are done and tell her we have to go since we were running late. Walking the carpet was great, somi being handsy as always. I am answering a few questions here and there. "So how long have our favorite hosts known each other?" I stared at somi as she pulled me close, holding the small of my back. "To be honest, feels like forever. We met backstage during my debut when I wasn't a soloist, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get rid of me." I laugh at that, knowing at first I did try to brush her off. "So it seems, ladies and gentlemen."

Everyone was running around, either lost or simply in a rush. "I remember when we had to go through that," I point towards the artists dancing and singing on stage and rushing backstage to change. "I still have to go through that tonight, baby." I then remembered she did, in fact, have to perform tonight and laugh out loud. "Oo right your bad, so how do you usually host?" She laughs and grabs my hand, holding it. "You're about to find out, babes." We walk out onto the stage, and the audience goes wild. I smile and start to wave at all of them. Before speaking in Japanese.

"Your favorite Japanese princess is here. It's crazy that some of you don't know I'm Japanese. The only foreign member in my group, like come on yall." The crowd starts laughing, and the camera points to the idols, and I scream, getting happy seeing Riize. "Wow, it seems someone sees their favorite idols." I smirk at some words while holding her hand, "I mean, it's riize like come on, guys. You all know why they get the hype. The girls that get it get it. And the girls that don't just don't." Me and somi start talking more about the upcoming performances while making jokes here and there. "OK, yall, I got to get Koreas national it girl backstage so she can change into one of her many chambers." I push her shoulder slightly before, "beauty is simply me." We laugh while walking off stage.

We walked out to present the next section of tonight with everyone gushing over my outify as usual. "Get like me, yall." Me and somi continued to make everyone laugh through the night. "I'll be back babes." Me and somi are sitting backstage eating some fried chicken. "Taste like home, girl. I haven't had this in a fat minute. I missed this." She laughs at me before continuing to eat, and we start to talk since we haven't seen each other in a while. "Your performance is gonna eat, I just know it." She smiles before pulling me closer, and I stop eating to stare at her. "What is there something on my face?" She pushes her chair closer and moves my food out of the way. I was about to argue before she grabbed my waist to pull me even closer. Now, this wasn't 100% out of the ordinary. I mean, somi was always a touchy person. So I never questioned it, though at this moment, it felt odd. "You're acting weirder than usual. I mean, you were acting like this on the phone when I was talking to you while putting on my dress. And earlier this week, what's going on som?"

She looked in my eyes before kissing me. This was completely unexpected. Sure, I mean, somi was a beautiful girl, and anyone could acknowledge that, but to kiss me was wild. "I like you," I stared at her still in shock from the kiss. "I like you to somi- she cut me off. Not as a friend, obviously. I've tried to express it for weeks. You're so oblivious to everything. When guys hit on you, I stand up for you. Telling everyone you're my girlfriend so leave you alone. Or showing up random times at night to your home because you told me you had a taste for a certain food earlier. Or even buy you gifts randomly because you are just so beautiful and I have every excuse to want to spoil you. Say something. Please." I couldn't find the words. I mean, my bestie had just confessed her love to me. "Did you just kiss me while I had chicken grease on my face?" She looks at me like she is about to cry before laughing. "You're very pretty somi, and you my rock. And I can't imagine my life without you. So, I guess I don't kinda like you too." I tell her sarcastically, before she leans in to kiss me again. In the process, we get notified she has to perform, and she looks back at me with that bug bright smile. "Will you watch?" I simply kissed her hands. "Miss a chance to watch my new girlfriend showing everyone what a soloist looks like, wouldn't miss it for the world."

I watched somi perform, and it was amazing to see her as my girlfriend was to see her in a different light. When she was done, I was dressed and styled, and she came backstage to change before looking at me. Kissing me on the mouth, not caring about anyone around. "Really all this babes?" I look at her with a bored expression. "The only no in fashion is to be boring, let's goo." We walk out there, and somi was walking ahead of me. "Wait a minute, guys, I gotta help my girl." I smile at her words blushing again. This would be like the 8th time tonight. "How has everyone's night been?" The crowd starts yelling with excitement, letting us know it has been amazing. "That's amazing to hear, I know mine has been way better than expected," she says while looking at me for the last part. "Sadly, though, we do have to close the night out, guys. we wanted to thank all of you for coming, especially the founding fathers of idols like TVXQ. I know it must've been hard trying to grab your oxygen pumps to get ready this morning."

The crowd starts laughing while the cameraman points to them, and they smile while looking at me. "It's ok to be elderly guys. It happens. I'll see you after to help you with your bad back, gentlemen." Somi pulls me closer before saying her goodbyes. After we finished, a staff member came out pulling me to the side, and smoi proceeds to read a card, and before I know it, I'm being handed awards. I kinda forgot about being nominated to begin with. "Omg, guys, omg. Fuck. Wait shit I can't say fuck. I'm sorry, children, tonight has been so crazy and I forgot all about this part, I just I don't even have speech. So unprepared, to all the girlies that decided hitting me with an award at the last minute was a good idea, fuck you and I still love you. Thanking everyone that has gotten me this far especially myself for being the baddest bitch kpop has ever seen. And too all the girls out there, I want you to know that plenty or people will complain about everything you have or don't have. But this right here shows that girls can do everything boys can do in this industry. If anything, RM is a worse dancer than me. That wasn't needed, but hey, it helps. And too, my best girl, somi, I love you, babes. Bye from your favorite baddest fairy godmother. And good night japan."

[babyarmybabbles]

Run ARMY! (Meet Part) a1 d4 +155 Words

[Caution: These are not full fics, or even full parts of fics for some, these are part of my writing progress archive!]

Concept: Reader won the opportunity to film a spin off of Run BTS! celebrating the boys return from enlistment, called Run ARMY!, over the course of seven days.

Word Count: 1,250

Notes: Our first official addition! I wanted to do additions in intervals of 1,000, but I'm on the fence of just completely rewriting this entire fic. I'm really unhappy with it and it's fighting me at every turn. I think I focused too much on the little things between point A and B and establishing Reader's voice and character. Might keep like the first bit of the Arrival part and a couple bits here and there. I'll sit on it. Marked the addition with []

Took Inspirations from Run ARMY! series on Tik Tok by _yamanika_ and Guess The Bias! by HelloMyAlien7 on Ao3

Warnings: Reader is p anxious lol. Sort of panic attack? Anxiety attack? idk man. Just anxious Reader.

Masterlist Link <3 | Prev Part Link c: | Next Part Link :D

By the time the SUV is pulling into the underground parking garage to meet the band in you’re sweating buckets. Not literally, thank the stars, but you feel near to it. Hannuel smiles kindly at you from the driver’s seat, obviously able to see your nerves. You’re pretty sure a satellite could see your nerves right now.

“You’ll be fine.” She soothes as the car descends. “The boys are super nice, and they’re excited to meet you. You’ve got nothing to worry about.” You suck in a deep breath in response and let it out. It doesn’t help much.

“I’m more nervous about ARMY not liking me than BTS not liking me.” You admit with a nervous laugh, consciously switching to twisting your rings around so you don't pick at your nails in your anxiety. Having bloody fingers while meeting your favorite group would not be a good look. “Also they intimidate me.” You add quietly.

You hear Hannuel stifle a snicker and your head shoots up to glare at her in affront. She’s supposed to support you, not laugh at you! She must see your mulish stare in the rear-view, because she quickly defends herself.

“Sorry, sorry! I’m not laughing at you, I promise. It’s just that they’re so silly sometimes, it’s hard to find them intimidating after having known them.” You easily concede the point to her. You'd seen enough behind the scenes content to get that impression. It’s a bit soothing to hear from an actual staff member though. “They’re the sweetest, really,” Hannuel continues, “You’ve genuinely got nothing to worry about. They’ll take care of you.”

You groan and let your head thump against the seat. “That’s part of the problem!” You complain, “It’s my first time on this side of a camera, it’s my first time meeting BTS, it’s my first time being in Korea, It’s just a lot! What if ARMY sees me fumbling and the boys helping me and decide they hate me? I can’t be hated by ARMY! I’d die!” You dramatically slump sideways, coincidentally timed with a turn that scootches you that much farther over.

Score one for dramatics.

Hannuel laughs gently at you, and you continue somewhat more seriously from your slumped position. “I mean, ARMY is basically my home. I don’t know what I’d do if they hated me.” You murmur into the leather cushion.

Hannuel hums musingly at you and the two of you lapse into silence for a moment.

“Well,” She starts, “First of all, you probably already know that you can never please everyone.” You nod miserably, aware that she could no longer see you. Both your therapist and your friends had told you as much many times. She continues, “But ARMY loves to see the boys interact with other ARMY. It’s another way they get to know them and feel connected. If you ask me, you’ll have more people projecting onto you than judging you. Not that they won’t judge, but” She shrugs, “People always do.”

You slowly sit up and shoot an admiring look at the woman. “Woah,” you mumble, “How are you so wise?”

Hannuel barks out a surprised laugh. “Life experience, mostly.” She replies amusedly.

You settle back into your seat and finally notice that Hannuel had stopped the car before what you assume to be the final turn before the boys would be in view. You feel a rush of gratefulness for her.

You hadn’t known her very long, but Hannuel had already been an incredible help and a very soothing presence to you. You should buy her something nice before you leave if you get the chance. See if you can send a gift basket through Hybe for her if you don't.

She starts the car rolling forward again as you reappear in the rear-view mirror, fully over your momentary theatrics. You take another deep breath and let it out again. It helps more this time.

“It’s not like my socials are public or anything either," You soothe yourself aloud, "And my friends already know me, they’re just excited. Everyone else is secondary.”

“Exactly” Hannuel affirms. You startle just a bit and then try to pretend you hadn’t forgotten she could hear you. Luckily, she’s too busy driving the car to notice. “Like I said, you’ll be just fine.”

Unfortunately for Hannuel’s encouraging words, you’d finally rolled close enough for you to spot seven men standing near 3 other SUVs just ahead and you were suddenly incapable of hearing anything anymore.

Static fills your brain as you study them. You register the casual clothes, watch them nudge each other excitedly as they notice your vehicle, even note the camera crew nearby, but not a single thought makes it past the haze of panic. Distantly, you wonder if this is what an adrenaline rush feels like. You suddenly can’t remember.

Your heartbeat thuds in your ears as the car comes to a gentle stop.

You absently bring one hand up to the pulse point under your jaw to measure your pulse and raise the other to your chest to make sure you’re still breathing. Hannuel is repeating instructions for your benefit in the front seat, but you simply cannot engage your brain enough to listen. All too soon she's exiting the car. You manage to tear your hands away from their comforting positions as she comes around and opens your door for you.

Hannuel helps you down as you duck out of the car and gives you a brief sympathetic smile as she takes your trembling hand.

Excited exclamations meet your arrival and you hastily paste confidence over your every mannerism as you lift both hands to wave back with equal excitement. Hannuel is the only one close enough to be able to see your hands continuing to shake, or note the fact that you stop breathing as you approach BTS.

You hope your smile isn't too tight and that you look appropriately excited. Hopefully whatever the cameras are seeing right now can be explained by excitement and reasonable nerves. You'll take your near panic-attack to the nearest private space, thanks.

["Hello! Oh my goodness, hi!" You release your held breath and end up attempting a sort of half-bow-half-handshake combo with RM that looks and feels incredibly awkward.

You’re mentally screaming apologies to him and despairing your lack of social graces as you move to greet the next member, one Kim Seokjin. You're not sure you can recover from this. You may just have to perish right here right now.

Blessedly, the man takes the lead for the interaction, opening his arms for a hug. You hesitate for a moment, double checking that he was giving you permission to hug him, before gratefully diving into the embrace.

The hug is a standard, friendly thing. Just a bit of a lean in and affectionate tap-tap-taps to eachothers upper back. It relaxes you immensely.

It helps that he more passes you to the next member down the line than let's you completely reset for a new interaction. No chance of awkwardness in pre-established patterns.

In this manner, you gain a hug from most of the other members as well. Yoongi is the only one who declines, offering a handshake that goes much more smoothly than your initial one with RM.

Once you're done with greetings, the PD introduces you, prompting you to wave and bow at them. You're sure it looks awkward because you feel awkward, but at least it gets done. ]

[xoxiu]

twinkle - ot7 x reader

chapter 04 table of contents masterlist

summary: she had just wanted attention, that’s why she kept texting the strange number, updating him on everything in her life. little did she know how dangerous this relationship actually was. it had been jimin’s idea to kidnap the girl, but the ability to travel across the world to actually do it had been all hoseok’s doing. convenient how some things work, right? they knew that they were destined to have their baby with them, whether she wanted it or not.

tags/warnings: kidnapping, forced age regression, spanking, noncon, mafia au, drug use, stockholm syndrome, caregiver!bts, little!reader, nonsexual, diapers, panic attacks, fluff and angst, sickfic, referenced child abuse, unrequited love

a/n: i wrote this fic in 2018 on ao3 and wattpad, but im putting it here for archival reasons ♡

The van pulled into the hotel parking lot, and Ophelia still slept. The drugs had made her sick and sleepy, and Ophelia realized that if she slept, her nausea went away. She didn't want to sleep since that made her susceptible to whatever her kidnappers would do to her, but the internal ickiness and external weakness was just too much.

"I'll give Lia her bottle if the rest of you load up the van," Seokjin said, quickly unbuckling his seatbelt so he could move to sit next to the sleeping girl. 

"I thought we were going to stay at the hotel for a bit before flying back?" Jimin asked, stepping out of the van, desperate to stretch his legs after the long car ride. Once Taehyung got out and the sleeping boys in the back woke up, Seokjin took Tae's spot next to Ophelia, running a hand through her hair with a smile. 

"No, I want to get her home soon. She's looking a little pale," Seokjin brushed a hand over Ophelia's forehead and cheek, noting just how hot and clammy it felt. The girl whimpered and turned her head away from Jin in her sleep, causing Jin to give a small coo at the action. 

Once the rest had left the van to pack their things, Seokjin unbuckled Ophelia from her car seat and maneuvered her so she was now sitting on his lap. The movement caused her eyes to open in panic, and her breathing to increase to the point where she was nearly hyperventilating. 

Seokjin noticed the beginning of her panic attack and began to gently bounce her. Ophelia eventually ended up choking on her breaths and sobs, but willed herself to continue to fight despite her limbs not cooperating with her mind. The chloroform started to wear off, as Ophelia could think much clearer and make out small words.

"N-no..." Ophelia choked out, closing her eyes as if that would make everything stop and disappear. "L-let go..." Seokjin only continued to shush her, put her head under his chin, and reached down to grab a bottle of water and a baby bottle. With the baby bottle in her vision, Ophelia noticed white powder resting at the bottom and feared that it wasn't formula mix. Once the water was poured in and the color remained clear instead of a milky white, Ophelia's panicking increased as the water was drugged. 

"Open up, baby," he said, holding the bottle to Ophelia's tightly shut lips, "Open up for Eomma."

Ophelia was caught off-guard by the man referring to himself as 'Eomma,' and Seokjin took to opportunity to slip the bottle into her unwilling mouth. Ophelia refused to drink from the bottle, fighting the natural instinct to suck, and attempted to maneuver the rubber nipple out of her mouth. This only resulted in the water that was forced out due to gravity to smear all over her lips and into her mouth. This caused Jin to click his tongue in disapproval and put slight pressure on the bottle, forcing more water to flow into Ophelia's mouth. Ophelia still refused to swallow, having the water slowly fill her mouth, leaking out from where her lips were parted around the baby bottle.

Not removing pressure from the bottle, Seokjin began to gently blow in Ophelia's face, triggering her to swallow. Ophelia shut her eyes tightly and unconsciously swallowed, causing her to also begin suckling on the bottle. Realizing that some of the white powder was now in her, she admitted defeat and quickly drank the water, wanting to get out of the situation sooner. Being in the car seat was much better than being on the strange man's lap.

With her eyes closed in an attempt to block out her current situation, Ophelia didn't notice another man come back to the car until he spoke. 

"Awh, someone's tired," the deep voice said, gently brushing his finger across Ophelia's cheek. Ophelia opened her eyes and glared at the man, recognizing him as the one previously in the passenger's seat. He smiled in return, laughing slightly at the girl's annoyance. 

"She should be out again soon," Seokjin said, "We have a long flight and I want her asleep for most of it. Tae said she should be out for twelve hours after her bottle." Ophelia began to internally panic; she didn't know what would happen to her in those hours she'd be unconscious. 

Soon enough all the water was out of the bottle. Jin removed the rubber nipple from Ophelia's mouth and grabbed the rag that Namjoon held out to him to wipe the water all over Ophelia's mouth. When his rag-covered finger brushed over her lips, Ophelia bit down on the fabric, causing Jin to pull his finger back. Instead of the expected glare and anger, Ophelia was shocked when the man simply chuckled before continuing. 

"Silly baby," Jin threw the rag back into the bag and tapped the tip of the girl's nose, "Eomma's finger isn't your bottle."

Ophelia groaned and flung her head back as if the small movements she could make was enough to escape the man's grasp. This only resulted in Jin cooing and rocking her gently. Already feeling the effects of the drug (a downside of being a lightweight), Ophelia sleepily looked outside the van at the clear blue sky and the other men carrying bags. The bright sunlight hurt her sensitive eyes, but she now refused to close them, fearing what would happen when she fell asleep. They said that they were flying somewhere, probably somewhere far away where no one would find her. 

It's not like anyone would look for me, Ophelia thought. My parents would do anything to get me away from them. 

Seokjin noticed Ophelia staring at Namjoon and smiled, figuring that she was quickly warming up to them since her face didn't have the glare it previously did. Namjoon, however, wasn't paying much attention. He was too distracted by his phone to see little doe eyes staring at him. 

"Are you looking at Appa?" Seokjin asked the girl, giving her a small bounce on his lap. This caught Namjoon's attention, who looked to find Ophelia's stare on him. He smiled, but realized that she wasn't exactly staring at him- it was almost like she was staring through him, deep in thought and pretending he wasn't there. His smile was taken over by a concerned glance towards Jin, which was ignored for Jin was too busy staring down at the girl in his lap. 

Ophelia, internally, was at war with herself. On one hand, she realized she no longer had to deal with her parents. No more yelling at three in the morning. No more cleaning up broken beer bottles before her brother woke up so he wouldn't step on any stray glass. No more being the only mature adult of the house. No more.

But that also means she basically left her siblings to fend for themselves. Henry was only a middle-schooler who grew up relying on Ophelia. While neither of them would admit it, Henry really had no clue how to take care of himself and Rose.

And Rose.

Rose. Ophelia left Rose alone. Ophelia felt her panic internalize to the point she was so tense she could explode. How long had she been gone? Rose was overdue for a feeding, and the only thing Ophelia could do was hope that Henry got home from school okay. Sometimes on his walk home, he decided to stop by a friend's home or corner store for a snack. While Ophelia never seemed to care, this time she hoped Henry came straight home and found Rose alone and at least fed and changed her. 

Someone would call the police. While Ophelia wasn't exactly popular, she had a lot of good friends (some of who could be considered 'popular'). Once someone realized that she wasn't answering her texts or came to school, someone would get suspicious and call in. Maybe Henry would as soon as he got home, and Ophelia would be found quicker than the plane could take off. That was most likely impossible, seeing as even Ophelia didn't know where she was. 

Unable to fight against the threat of sleep any longer, Ophelia closed her tear-filled eyes.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Hi BPP, How will I know when the implosion begins? Is there an inverted yield curve for fandoms? Point form answers are are acceptable! Happy D-DAY!! 💜���

Thank you for all the work you’ve put into this blog. It’s been a super interesting and enjoyable part of SM for me!

***

Hi @babyyourelemonade

An inverted yield curve for fandoms! Now that's a brilliant idea. I'd personally pay to contribute to funds for research on that topic honestly. And it could have implications outside of fandom too, such as for whole countries since many fandoms now work like splintered political communities more than anything else. I imagine it would be an upgrade to the theory on what caused the fall of Rome, or something like that.

I think I'm alone (mostly) in my opinions on the fandom imploding, and I don't want to talk much about it because I genuinely hope I'm very wrong, and because I don't have a lot of evidence to back up why I feel this way, so there's little point in going on about it.

But you've asked so I'll be brief:

Personally, I think the implosion has already started lol. The moment the fandom decided that taekookers were someone else's problem and should only be ignored, the seeds for implosion were already set. In my opinion. Think about Larries and the 1D fandom. Shipping is one thing but as I've said before, there are theories unique to taekook shipping that are inherently subversive to the very idea of BTS, and all it takes is someone crazy enough to do real damage. But that risk was somewhat contained so long as BTS was active and things were predictable. After the 2022 Festa Dinner and the fandom now experiencing Chapter 2 where so much is now unpredictable, where indulging in competition between the members is more permissible, the control on that risk has reduced somewhat. Solo stans, akgaes, and toxic shippers are like an immuno-virus that weakens from within because they're just as passionate and involved as regular fans, they're just twisted enough to prioritize their desires over everyone else, including the members they claim to stan.

The second problem is ARMYs. Lol. Specifically the ARMYs who have tied BTS's worth to the records and titles they hold, because those are the people most likely to do stupid shit when they feel threats to those records are imminent. At some point in 2021, I noticed when people would discuss what BTS means to them and to the industry, they'd just rattle off only records and accomplishments as if that was it. Before then, at least in my experience, people would talk about the lyrical impact of BTS's songs, they'd talk about the stylistic choices made in this or that album that relative to the other albums out at the time, and so on. There's nothing wrong with gloating about BTS's records because frankly that's the only thing that shuts up some antis. But it becomes a problem I think, when those records become the primary reason you think BTS have the status and caliber they have, and you’ve tied it to a central part of your identity.

Because records will always be broken.

And in Chapter 2 that is nearly guaranteed to happen. So the ARMYs who make that both their identity, and BTS's, will expose BTS to even more ridicule than they would've faced otherwise and will be disproportionately affected. If another group gets a Grammys nomination this year for example, or *gasp* actually wins the award next year, lol just pack it all up and give it to God. It will be bloody in these purple streets. Because too many ARMYs have tied BTS's worth to their achievements and only heightened the risk for implosion before 2026.

I've got a few more reasons but I've already written enough, and like I said I don't have much evidence for what I'm thinking anyway. But I suggest anyone who calls themselves a fan of BTS, reflect sometimes on why they're a fan, why they spend time in fandom spaces, and think about how to build real, honest community with people here while trying not to take too much personally.

[curio-queries]

Run BTS: 049 | Eve of Episode 50 Festival part 1

Original Air Date: 17 APR 2018 Episode Length: 23:43 Total Parts: 2 YouTube English Subtitles: Yes Title Song: Blood Sweat & Tears

Synopsis: A summary episode - reliving moments from the past 50 episodes

Production: so...it's exceedingly obvious that they intended this to only be one episode but they spilled it over into the next one. Most of the time that will work but when you're making a big deal about it being the 50th, it doesn't really work. Overall, not the worst execution of a 'clips' ep but i think we'd all agree that we'd rather have original content than watch compiled clips. if I want to watch those moments, I'll go watch the actual eps. It's not that I hate the idea of a bottle show via past content but this one just wasn't executed well. It's really nice to see the ceramics complete from a few episodes before.

Here's a weird editing note: pointing out the prod team didn't know the members were hungry and surprised they were eating. I get that sometimes the food is for show (especially on their livestreams) but why did they feel the need to state it in the subs? It just makes the guys and the prod team look ill-prepared.

Another thing, i know most probably won't notice but when they do cut to clips, it's like they've ripped them straight from the internet instead of the original files. The audio is SO disjointed. To do this properly, they should have grabbed the clips without the music and added new music in the compilation. Also the part where they watch their own clips is too long. Don't get me wrong, i actually enjoy watching BTS react to their own content but that's in the context of a reaction livestream or a Bomb, not as an episode of a variety show. A little hint of it would have been sufficient but it does nothing for the pacing of this episode. Final also, is it just me or is there something off about the translation? The quality just seems more lacking than we're used to.

Endearment: Uh, if my above notes didn't give it away, i think this episode does absolutely nothing for the guys. it's vaguely interesting to me to see what moments they remember from past episodes before the clips are played but I wouldn't call it endearing at all. They're put in this hard spot where they know that the audience is infinitely more knowledgeable about their content than they are but they still have to put on this show. oh, it was nice to hear them talk about what they'd like to do for the future, knowing which actually become episodes

Winner/Loser: none

Best Cheater: none

Member Moments:

RM: RM still remembered the names of the dogs. my heart!

JN: Jin confusing the Santa Run ep with when they filmed Bon Voyage at Santa Village.

YG: Yoongi being iconic for playing along with the question asking how Yoonji is doing now.

JH: Savage Hobi! Jimin complimenting everyone's acting and saying he should act, Hobi hits him with the 'not you'

JM: Way to go Jimin with the guessing...it's almost sus...

V: Tae's adorable squashed pottery as a callback to the squirrel garden.

JK: Im glad JK was enjoying the snacks.

Bonus Content: So much more engaging than the actual episode! absolutely worth the watch. (plus you can see Tae drink through a million straws at the same time...slight exaggeration..)

CQ Rank: 1.5

(CQ Eval Date: 05 FEB 2024)

Check out this post for my Masterlist of all episodes and descriptions of how I'm evaluating these.

Previous Episode: 048

Next Episode: 050

[mimibwi]

BTS and fanservice

This is a big topic and issue among shippers, so I'll give my opinions on the matter (if anyone cares to read).

BTS members definitely do fan service. There shouldn't be much debate around that but I want to put it out there in the event that someone didn't already know that. All K-pop groups do fan service to some degree and it's fine, in my opinion. It makes things interesting and gets the fans screaming, so who’s complaining?

The conversation about fanservice gets out of control when it comes to shipping. Much of it comes down to what the fans think fan service is. I don't see fan service as completely fake and drawn up by the company's execs. Don't get me wrong, I don’t think the company is completely uninvolved but the theories you present are way too over the top. They come across more like conspiracy theories rather than opinions I can even consider a possibility.

At most, fan service contains acts that build off existing dynamics and sometimes exaggerate them to a certain degree. So while I don't think some of the actions are spur-of-the-moment things (it's evident they talk about/plan some of the moments beforehand) I still don’t think most fan service moments are devoid of any genuine emotions. It’s hard for me to talk about this cause; honestly, I don’t care about the whole calling out fanservice thing. I enjoy all the members’ interactions. Maybe some floor me more than others but I can’t sit here and be mad about two friends interacting.

((A lot more below the cut))

^^All these moments are fanservice in some way or another and they are all cute to me. I don’t get why yall make a big deal out of it so much. Just enjoy it, and smile a little!! Sometimes I wonder how toxic shippers and solos feel when they watch BTS content. You all must be angry as hell when these men (who have known each other for 10+ years, might I add) interact and look happy doing it.

Let me make my points as clear as I can-

some on-stage moments are staged to some degree. I may be wrong but I think I’ve seen a video of Tae saying he wanted to do a moment with Jimin on stage but Jimin was too awkward (lol) so he did it with JK instead. Maybe I hallucinated that cause it's in my memory but I couldn’t tell you where I heard that from. Either way, I am actually convinced this happens often. That or they do something once, see the audience’s reaction, then keep doing it for the other performances.

Fanservice isn’t completely disingenuous. I don’t look at it as a black-and-white conversation. Two members hugging for fans to scream on stage doesn’t take away from their bond. It doesn’t make their entire relationship a fraud. So to me, it’s less of “x ship IS fanservice” and more like “this moment from x ship seems to be fanservice” or “x ship does fanservice sometimes”. I can’t argue with the last two statements for the most part (well I lied, I’m literally countering them with this post in a way) but the first statement makes my skin crawl. It's so dismissive and disrespectful to the boys. — Thinking about it more, I can argue with all the statements even more than I am doing right now because there are moments that are looked into way to deeply. You guys will say “this moment is fanservice” and it’s two members sitting next to each other or talking or looking at each other or *insert any normal interaction that occurs between people who know each other and shouldn’t be seen as a big deal at all*.

*This is me looking for the service (that was so earth-shatteringly obvious and bad that it needed to be called out as such) sometimes.

Please just let people enjoy what they enjoy; it’s not that serious. I know shippers do all of this to fire back at other shippers so it’s just an endless cycle of hate and bitterness but I don’t care tbh you all need to stop it, yall take everything way too far.

Not every on-stage or on-camera moment is fanservice. It's hard for us to distinguish because we never fully know the boy’s intentions at any particular time. This is why I despise this ‘all or nothing,’ ‘black and white’ mindset many shippers have because it can cause you to 1) start digging into moments that aren’t that serious or 2) dismiss real, genuine friendship when it's right in front of you. It’s also frustrating because what one person may think is fs may come across as a genuine moment to someone else then everyone goes to war because of it. The fact of the matter is that none of us know for sure, so we shouldn’t spend time arguing about things when every single one of us could be wrong.

The above points are mainly in reference to on-stage moments. It gets even messier when we discuss the pre-recorded, edited content. This is where you guys lose me even more.

It’s hard to believe that fan service is this huge ordeal and that they plan who will interact with who more. It's also hard for me to think that at this point in their career, BH staff are sitting with these almost thirty-year-old men and telling them how to act. It's absurd to me. While I definitely think there are things they are advised to do or shouldn't do or say, I don't see any of them as the huge conspiracies that fans (shippers) push. So no, the member’s actions are not controlled on the big scale many shippers suggest. I love speculation and theories but there are some things I can't bring myself to speculate about. So the "BH is pushing x ship,” "they edited out all the x ship moments for y ship,” "x member is doing fan service to feed shippers" conversations just bore me for the most part.

Even if they are told to do something, sit somewhere, or get paired together for content, it could simply not be about a ship— at least not in the way people think it is. I mentioned this in my first post but NOT EVERYTHING THESE MEN DO IS ABOUT A SHIP. This is one of the saddest parts of shipping to me. Shippers reduce these beautiful, unique, insanely interesting people to just a ship. “X is sad/hurt/happy because of Y,” NO he could literally just be happy. We’re talking about regular people here, people like you and me, who have so much to offer and shouldn’t be looked at solely through a shipper lens. Whether you think the ship is real shouldn’t matter because this is basic human decency.

The “x ship is being edited out theories”— These, like I mentioned before, bore me and in some instances frustrate me.

How can you say for sure that things you don’t know happened actually happened and were edited out? This kind of shipper logic isn’t for me I fear. I know you could say, “so you’re telling me x and y only interacted once that day?” but it still doesn’t hold up because—

There could be many reasons why a ship moment is cut out. Some possibilities include:

they thought it was boring- lol I don’t know; maybe the editors thought that moment was a snooze fest and they wanted to include things the people would find interesting.

time constraints- with content like ITS or Bon Voyage, where there are days worth of content from seven different perspectives, must be a shitshow to edit. It’s obvious not every interaction will get into the final version. To sit and think the editors intentionally said “We’re out of time? Scrap the x ship parts” is honestly laughable. Let’s be a little serious. Shippers are so funny to me sometimes because I can promise you regular people don’t give af about these ships as much as we do so I doubt they care enough to sabotage them.

it doesn’t fit in the theme of the content- The moment could just not fit in with the overall flow of the content. Maybe there is a particular image they’re trying to draw up with the content and a certain moment throws it off and doesn’t fit the image. With the time constraints I mentioned, it makes sense why they would want to insert some things over others.

something else is happening on screen- I know all shippers get disappointed when it seems like their ship is interacting and the angle changes. BUT that disappointment in that particular moment should not translate into these big conspiracy theories. It’s natural for the camera angle to switch when other things (probably more interesting or things that matter more to the overall content) happen. We’re looking at 7 different people for Christ’s sake.

it’s personal- This should be obvious but I am sure the guys talk about or do things that are just personal. Although I don’t think it’ll be anything crazy considering they’re mic-ed up and are aware they’re on camera, they could just not want certain things out there. They already show us so much (I’m grateful for that 4%) of their lives, I think we should allow them to be able to want things cut out.

*insert other reasons here that definitely does factor in but my brain can’t think of right now*

What irks me the most about these conversations is what they usually always stem from in the first place. They all come from an angle that serves to prove that some ships are better or claim that some ships only interact because they’re forced to. The hypocrisy that comes along with this type of shipping is also quite crazy to me. It’s always the ship you don’t like and that threatens your beliefs that is fanservice/fake/forced when they so much as touch each other but every single interaction between your ship is 100% real. I don’t think you guys hear yourself when you speak sometimes. I will never get why this shipping business needs to be a competition. Like the concept of going to war online over two people’s —who you most likely have never met and don’t know personally— relationship will always be interesting to me. It also doesn't matter whatsoever. No ship’s “realness” should depend on another being fake or worse and if that’s the case then maybe your ship isn’t as real as you think it is. All 21 (I swear I did the math, it’s 21 right??) ships in BTS are unique in their own way and I wouldn’t want any of them to be exactly like another because I love all dearly. Although some dynamics tug on my heart more than others, I will never dismiss any to bring up others because the boys genuinely love each other and I can tell as much.

You know sometimes I blame a lot of shipper logic and theories on the fact that many of us feel like these men’s lives are more interesting than they actually are. It’s so sad because a lot of the drama our brains think up makes the guys victims either to each other or the company. The fanservice argument is just that to me. Why can’t we believe the boys are fine in their current situation, that they enjoy their little fanservice moments to stir up fans but it’s not something they’re being held at gunpoint to do? They’re entertainers after all. Why do you as a fan of these guys, think they’re being completely calculating every time they show up in front of a camera? Why can’t yall believe they’re being as genuine as their situation allows? Maybe this is a naïve way of looking at things but it’s easier and it’s the foundation of my views as an ARMY. Playing the mind fuck olympics whenever a member comes around to spend time with us is exhausting. I don’t even share many of these opinions but simply reading them drains so much out of me. We really do read into certain things way too much and I get that’s the whole point or basis of shipping. Still, it gets really muddy to me when people start victimizing and villainizing parties involved because of the shipper’s (and even solo’s) opinions and perspectives.

In conclusion, I don’t agree with any of the fan service theories nor do I think fan service is a particularly bad thing. Even if I have fleeting thoughts about particular moments, I don’t entertain them too much because I don’t know the whole story. It’s also because I respect the members. I respect their autonomy, their words and their dynamics with each other and entertaining these ideas and theories that obviously (even if it isn’t obvious to you) disregard the things I respect would slowly destroy that. So the two just cannot coexist for me. Plus, this shipper thing just isn’t that serious to me. The only reason I even care to think and even talk about this topic is because of the hate the members get cause of it. It’s unfair:(

Look how cute they all look together while they do their little fan service🥺. #letmybabiesdofanserviceinpeace

ⁱ ʰᵒᵖᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ˢᵃʳᶜᵃˢᵐ ᶜᵒᵐᵉˢ ᵃᶜʳᵒˢˢ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ˡᵃˢᵗ ˡⁱⁿᵉ ᶜᵃᵘˢᵉ ⁱ ʳᵉᶠᵘˢᵉ ᵗᵒ ᵉˣᵖˡᵃⁱⁿ ᵐʸˢᵉˡᶠ

~~🐝

[lynnesgalaxy]

Time to continue this! Their arrival to mainland is a bit of a messy one, hiding from everyone, trying to get their lives back on track... Emilette is no different, trying to adjust to the changes she knows she has to make.

Post-Snaktooth:

Going Home

Previous - First - Next

—

Everyone was hopeful. Despite what they had all gone through, now that the airship had safely arrived at the mainland, everyone was wearing big—although tired—smiles. And understandably so, since despite what her head had told her during those terrifying moments just barely hours ago, everyone had managed to stay in one piece.

While she had been participating here and there with the group, adding in her own commentaries as everyone did their best to conceal their snakified bodies, her eyes were heavy, and soon after everyone was ready she found herself simply listening in silence. When the journalist handed her a piece of the balloon's remains, all she could do was grunt in response as she covered herself with the cloth. The battle from before had taken a toll on her, not being used to moving around so much, but she knew she still had to keep herself awake. At least, until everyone was home…

Her eyes shifted from grumpus to grumpus. Everyone had a place to call home, right? Wambus and Triffany had mentioned the old house they used to live in and how it should still be in good condition; Filbo mentioned something about staying with the journalist; Shelda mentioned her family waiting for her; Snorpy and Chandlo still had enough to afford rent; Floofty, Creetus…

While Wiggle had offered to the few that didn’t have a place of their own to stay for a while at her mansion, Emilette had shied away from the opportunity. It wasn’t as if she didn’t want to accept, especially considering how luxurious it sounded, but… she couldn’t bring herself to. After all she had done to hurt everyone, she couldn’t make them put up with her on a daily basis until who-knew-when.

So, as the gentle sound of the waves faded away and the chattering of the other excited grumpuses filling her ears threatened to lull her to sleep as they walked together, she let her own mind drift away. She never had plans to come back to the mainland; the prospect of leaving everything behind forever had been far too tempting to put too much thought into it at the time. Of course she regretted it now, but what else could she do? The damage was already done, and now reality had once again come back to hit her where it hurt the most: in the end, she was all by herself. Alone.

It took her a moment to realize the group had stopped moving, and goodbyes and see-you-soons were being exchanged. She shook her head in an attempt to keep herself awake enough to respond, and watched the first members of the group leave. Then a few others. Then others.

By the time the limousine arrived, only Wiggle’s group was left. The tall, orange grumpus approached her with a concerned frown, “Darling, are you sure you don’t want to come with us? There’s plenty of space to share.”

Beffica was barely a few steps behind, catching up to the conversation with ease, "Yeah, you're missing out. Wiggle said she has this huge pool and I'm dying to chill there till I'm all wrinkly. You should totes come with."

Emilette waved a paw dismissively, her smile betraying the sick feeling in her chest, “I’ll be fine. You guys have fun, I’m sure Gramble’ll love the ducks or whatever you said you have. And Cromdo’ll be thrilled living the rich life. I'll just…" she gestured to the cloth she was holding around her, "I'll raid that pool once I'm all done dealing with this.”

Wiggle smiled back at her, amused, “Swans, dear, not ducks. But alright, suit yourself. You know where to find me if you need where to go.”

Beffica didn't seem as convinced, frowning instead. "Hey. Keep in touch."

"Y-Yeah…" Emilette replied, unsure on how to react to her concerned expression. Whatever jumped inside her stomach in that moment, she made sure to bury it as deep and quickly as she could. Grump, they had to leave soon before she couldn’t hold herself back anymore.

Cromdo was already in the limousine, admiring the details on the inside, while Gramble stood quietly, waiting for Wiggle. After a quick nod at her, Wiggle turned away and got into the car with him. Beffica took one last glance at her before waving a paw and getting inside with the group.

Emilette watched in silence as the vehicle left, letting her tired smile finally drop to her usual frown. The weight on her chest only increased. Was she truly doing the right thing? She didn’t know the first thing about being a good person, but this was for the others’ sake, right? Even if that ended up putting her directly on the streets.

Maybe she could get in contact with her parents. She could try to find a phone… although remembering their number was another story, not to mention if it was still working at all, or if they cared to pick up. But the situation was desperate enough to try-

“Hey.”

Emilette nearly jumped out of her skin. “Grump- Dude!” She put a paw on her chest, glaring at the source of that trembling voice she recognized well, “You gotta stop doing that.”

Frankley scratched their chin with an apologetic smile, “Sorry. It’s just...” They looked away for a moment, looking for the right words, “Do you... really have somewhere to stay?”

She blinked at them. “Yes- No- I mean-” she clicked her teeth together. “I’ll figure it out.”

Frankley frowned, letting a few moments pass. After realizing Emilette wasn’t going to say anything else, they spoke again. “Why did you tell Wiggle no if you have nowhere to go?”

Emilette huffed, then stopped herself. Instead, she took a deep breath. She had to control her temper, wasn’t that part of the issue? “I… don’t know. I don’t want to be a bother, I guess.”

“But she… offered. And she didn't seem to mind.”

"Please," she rolled her eyes, "she didn't mind because she was already inviting the others in. She had to invite me out of courtesy, too. Or pity, at least."

Frankley looked down the road where the car had gone, pondering, "She and Beffica... really seemed concerned for you-"

“Shit- Listen,” she gestured around her, “I’ve hurt you all enough already, okay? They don’t have to put up with me just because I’m homeless now. That's why I said no, get it now?"

Frankley opened their mouth to reply, but quickly closed it when she continued, now glaring at them. "Why are you here anyway? Why didn’t you take her offer either?”

This time, however, Frankley didn’t miss a beat to reply, “I have a place to rent.”

Emilette's glare dropped, instead now simply replaced by disbelief, “...You do?”

They shrugged, “I always had it just in case, as a backup if I ever had to leave the island. I mentioned it earlier, remember?”

“Oh- Right. Sure, yeah, I remember.” The small grumpus mumbled. She vaguely recalled the conversations from earlier, but could only remember the details of a few in her groggy state. She had no idea Frankley had even spoken at the time, so it came as news for her. From seeing them desperately clinging onto that snak back at the island or following every single word anyone said, they had always seemed the more impulsive kind in her mind, so them having a plan in case of something unexpected was… surprising. Then again, she had never truly bothered to get to know them before.

They noted how she had once again fallen silent. Her eye bags were understandably heavier than usual, but they couldn't help but feel the deepness in which they truly went. It wasn't just the trip that had her this exhausted.

"What if…" Frankley mulled over their words, "What if you stay at my place for a few days?"

"What?!" Emilette snapped out of her thoughts almost immediately.

"I-I mean- just for a bit, until you can get back up on your feet!" They waved their paws, taking a step back at her outburst.

"No- No, no, no, no." She pointed at them. "You of all grumpuses don't get to be nice to me after all the shit I put you through. No."

"But you apologized to me..." Frankley replied.

"That- That still doesn't make it okay! Dude! I just-" she gritted her teeth, "That was exactly my point! You can't just act like nothing happened after what I did! You think I would've been able to say that if I hadn't been drunk?! Don't pretend you like me because I said sorry once. I'm garbage, you can't just let that go for one weakass apology."

"I-" Frankley gulped, "I never said I liked you." they replied.

That was enough to shut her right back up. She stared at them. After everything they'd told her back at the island, she expected as much, but hearing them say that outloud still made something awful stir inside. 

"But just because I don't like you doesn't mean I'll leave you to die out there." The yellow grumpus continued. While their voice still trembled, they looked at her with conviction.

Emilette looked away from them, grumbling under her breath. 

"I-It's my choice, okay?" Frankley continued once again. "I know how it is to have almost nothing, and I don't want someone I know going through it too. A-and you already rejected your only other option, so…"

Curse them and their kindness. Curse her prickling eyes, threatening to blur her gaze. "Ugh, I should've taken it."

Frankley scratched their chin, "...Yeah."

She didn't look at them again, instead nodding with a small hum, but that was enough response for them. They gave her a small smile. "It's this way," they began walking down the street.

Emilette looked at them for a moment, moving further away with each light step. They were still too naive. Too sweet. Too trusting. Too nice. They were an idiot to offer her a chance when she hadn't done anything to deserve it. But the first signs of a headache were forming due to her exhaustion, and the weight of her own sleepy body was threatening to throw her against the floor at any moment… she wasn't in condition to say no again.

She caught up with them, her gaze refusing to leave the ground. She rubbed her arm, noticing its shape was almost back to normal under her clothing. After a few moments walking side by side in complete silence, she mumbled in the lowest voice she could muster, "Thank you."

Frankley looked down at her, tilting their head. "What was that?"

"Fuck you." Emilette corrected herself out loud, not bothering to look up.

The tall grumpus frowned, disappointed, but stayed silent. The next few days with her around were definitely going to be a challenge.

[thisismewritingsstuff]

Everyone's freaking out on twt over the bts photo showing Alexander and Wille (and seriously, sameee). Since we're a fandom so deprived of content that we basically over analyze every bit of crumb thrown our way, I decided to theorize what this might mean and all my brain came up with is that:

1. I agree it has something to do with a revenge plot against August. Think about it. The Queen has known it was August who leaked the tape and told Wille that they would "gain nothing by going public", meaning she has no intention of punishing him, and I bet my left toenail that she will continue to provide for August if only for the sole reason of buying his silence. After all, the press would have a field day if they find out that it's an actual member (distant, but still) of the royal family who filmed and outed the prince.

2. Wille is obviously furious about this. However, I think he'll go along with his mother in order to maintain what little agency he has. This would explain the more "princely" haircut. The PR team and Queen probably thinks it would be good to change his image, literally and metaphorically. Haircuts are pretty symbolic in shows/movies too, as it's often related to someone moving on or changing. Whether this is for better or for worse with regards to Wilhelm, well, we'll have to wait and see. (I do believe it'll be a turning point for him. Watch as our boy starts hatching plans with every snip oh-ho)

3. In relation to number 2, Wille is probably going to use his crown prince card. If he can't punish August for the tape, then he can do the next best thing: take away Hillerska from him. We all know how important Hillerska is to August—it's basically his whole world—and I'm assuming that after the whole Society fiasco there's a certain power imbalance at school, or at least at its higher ranks. We saw a photo of Nils and Wille, and although we're not sure yet if that's an actual scene or not, I'll still wager that they'll have a lot of scenes together in S2. This is significant as we don't really see them interact at all in S1. I know Nils isn't part of the Society, but he is one of August's best friends (along with Vincent) and as a third year wields some sort of authority over the boys at school. He'll probably feel left out of August's nobles-only-bs soon enough. Vincent will probably leave August in the dust as well, as he is the one supplying him meds early on and he wouldn't want his name to be associated with August if things get out of hand. So Wille will be having them in his hold one by one. They all want to be close to him if only to get favors in the future, but that's fine. You gotta use what you have, right?

4. Obviously this will create a divide among the students, especially those in the upper ranks, but the deciding factor will be Alexander. I suppose Wille got a hold of him by asking the other boys and I think he'll offer him a proposition that's both beneficial to Alexander and detrimental to August. I doubt Alexander will help them out of the goodness of his heart because, after all, Wille is a huge reason why he was the one that got blamed in the first place. Drug related offences in Sweden vary in severity and punishment, but suffice to say that it won't be good for August's record for him to be involved in a drug case, and in extension, this will put the Queen in a tight spot as she's basically sponsoring him. Let's see just how much she means family first.

5. Depending on whatever offer Wille can give Alexander, it'll be imperative that it's Alexander who implicates August, as Wille can be removed from the situation and no one—not August or his mother—can outright accuse him of having anything to do with bringing August down. He can even have Simon's involvement in the whole thing erased as part of the bargain. Like Wille mentioned back in S1, it doesn't matter when it's their word against one guy. No one will believe whatever story August comes up with, however true, since no one will back him up. Like I mentioned earlier, even Vincent will leave him. Sara will, too, after she inevitably admits to Simon the truth.

6. My call? Wille will take over Hillerska, bring August to heel, then push the Queen to a corner by basically forcing them to choose between the two: either to let him have the life he wants or at least move in a limited capacity that allows him to be with Simon, or air out all the family's dirty laundry. They'd have to settle for what they think is the lesser evil here. If Wille plays his cards right, we'll get to see him in his gaslight gatekeep girlboss era.

The sooner Wille realizes that being Crown Prince has its advantages, the better he'll be able to move things according to his will. What's the worse they can do? Remove him from the line of succession? Doubt the Queen will want to announce to the world the reasons why. People's distaste and disapproval for the monarchy will just skyrocket. And if there's one thing the Queen loves more than her son—scratch that, she loves everything more than her son. So yeah, she won't risk it.

[bts-trash-blog]

Hi hi! If you’re taking requests from time to time, I have an indulgent one 👉🏻👈🏻 ABO BTS, inspired by your BOU fic !

After a very long, intense, and stressful day at work, reader comes home to the boys (Yoongi, Joon, and Hoseok) to unwind.

For a rare occasion, she allows herself to drop around them to relax and cope with her feelings from the day !

If you happen to actually write this, I’d 100% love to see your take on it and your full artistic expression— feel free to alter the scenario or add to it~

Okay this idea is so flipping cute. I just cant help myself writting a little blurb about this~this blurb might end up in a future chapter btw so it's kinda also a teaser as to see how the BOU realtionship developes~

~'-'~

The tightness of your shoulders was what you noticed first when you slid into the back seat of the car. The driver the boys had assigned to you had even noticed how tense you were when you had buckled yourself in. You could see the twist of his face at your soured scent, his hand even going up to pinch his nose, it had your Omega pushing to the front. For you to drop.

So when you enter the apartment, the mix smell of your mates has your shoulders drop as you let out a chirp calling out to one, if not all of the males. Within a second Namjoon responds back with a happy growl as you walk to the living room. There was your dimpled head Omega, his dirty blonde hair falling in his face as he gave you a bright toothy smile. His brown eyes glimmer against the illuminated lights of the T.v, his hand reaching out to you making you sigh as you move and place your hand into his larger one.

"How was your day baby?" You huff as you move to straddle his legs, your head falling into his neck, your nose running from the base of his neck up to his ear. His free hand lands on your hip as you feel his warm breath against your skin. The sweet fruity smell of him wraps around you as you pet out a loud content sigh.

"Sleepy...dazy." you mutter those two words making his hand squeeze your hip, as you feel his other hand slip from yours, his thumb running along your jaw as you lift your face from where it was hidden. His brown eyes look at you, a soft feeling filling your joints as you feel your Omega pushing to the front, for you to drop.

"Dazy?" He hummed, his hand running up your back as you felt your body grow heavy suddenly. "Do you want to drop pup?" His question had your lips parting as you nod. The smile he gave you was blinding, it had you humming as he croons at you. "Let's go get you comfy, then you can drop."

"But what about you?" You mumble, your voice raspy as you speak, your words had Namjoons body slumping as he chuckles.

"I'll drop when Yoon and Hobi get home. I gotta make sure my baby is safe." His words were soft as you slid off of his lap, standing as his body follows. His hand placed on your waist behind you, pushing you forward making you hum as the warmth of his body heat spreads.

"Good head omega." You mutter, you Omega speaking for you as you trail up the stairs. Your words have his chest rumbling as you look to see his chest slightly puffed out as he looks at you. A look of pride was painted on his face as you looked behind you, his nose pressing into your hair as you took a deep breath in.

“My good omega.” His words had you huffing with joy as the two of you giggled your way into the room. The heavy feeling rushing through your body had ten fold in minties to the point that by time you were dressed and back down stairs you had completely dropped. Your body was almost completely limp next to him on the L-shaped couch, his fingers running up and down the skin of your arm as the side of your face rubbed into his thigh. The feeling of goosebumps rising on your skin as a constant purr rumbles up from your chest and your fingers knead at the couch. “Pup, have you eaten?” His voice was pitched slightly lower than his natural one, showing how close he was from dropping alongside you, but his need to be alert to protect and provide for you was stronger. Though  when all he got in respound was you purring he realized how deep of a drop you had gone in, he knew the moment you had lost full control with the overly sweet smell of cookies rushing out from you. It has his mouth watering as his nose is suddenly running along your neck. “Mega.” He whimpers against your skin, his body hunched over your non-verble frame, tongue running over your skin making you let out a pinning nose as you roll onto your back and look up at him.

The sound of the front door, and the strong thick smell of Alpha musk and lighter with light chatter had your head Omega growling as his arms wrap around you as he rolls your back onto your side. Bringing your large thighs closer to your chest makes you whine, when suddenly Namjoon relaxes, his whole body weight dropping onto your shoulder making you whine as his music nose note pushes onto your cheek. Your eyes peek to see a hand wrapped onto the back of his neck, scuffing hiim.

“Growling at us now?” Hoseok's voice has Namjoon whining as you feel his body lift, your body being lifted off of Namjoons lap to be sat into the arms of Yoongi. The smell of pine mixing with a campfire has your head leaning onto his shoulder  as your fingers grip his soft silk button down. A button twisting between your fingers as your half closed eyes look up at the black haired Alpha, his deep onyx eyes were already on you. “Our pup dropped and you didn’t let us know?” Hoseok asks Namjoon as you look to see Hoseok straddling Namjoon, who was looking at the Alpha with a droopy look as you see his hand pressing against Hoseok's thighs. “Do you need to drop too, baby?” You watch as Namjoon nods slowly, you see Hoseok's tense dominating figure drop as he wraps his arms around his neck. “Go for it baby, then you and our pup can nest, and scent all night long.”

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Be Prepared - thoughts and commentary

Gonna try to just talk about vocals and arrangement stuff here, because I will be doing a VoicePlay Visuals post for this too, but we'll see. I do know the original song very well though - in fact I rewatched the OG like the other day or something after I saw that picture of Layne and Cyndi that hinted at what Voiceplay was up to. Anyway let's go!

(Put below the cut because this is a lot of just me rambling)

OKAY SO SLEEPING IN THE COLD BELOW HAS BEEN KNOCKED OFF ITS PERCH FOR FAVOURITE VP SONG OF 2024

The opening percussion fill thingy from Layne honestly reminds me a lot of the start of the Moana medley, and apparently I wasn't the only one to think that! A few other Patrons mentioned it, and there was even a very brief throwaway joke about it in the BTS! I have since compared the start of the Moana Medley to the start of this, and they're not identical, but there are still definitely similarities, and it's not actually all that common for VP songs to start off with that sort of drum-like percussion anyway.

Trying very hard to not talk about the on-screen stuff here, because I'll be leaving that for Voiceplay Visuals, but I just have to put it out there that Geoff looks amazing here, and the ACTING OH MY GOD. This is like Oogie Boogie 2.0 in terms of how much Geoff is moving around and embodying the character! Alright now back to vocals/arrangement

Okay so next thing that must be mentioned - the rap! According to a snippet from Layne in the Patreon post description, there was some uncertainty as to whether the dialogue should be kept in or not, which was an issue that VP also faced for their cover of Hellfire last year. When Layne asked Patrons what they thought, it was basically a 50/50 split, so not very helpful, rip. So he thought "What if we keep the dialogue but do it in a way that it feels like it's part of the song -> a 'rap'?" So yeah basically Layne wrote that rap section to be a stand-in for the original dialogue, and honestly it works so well!

This song features Mykal Kilgore, who is one of the OG members of "VoicePlay", way before it was called VoicePlay! I'll say a bit more about him in my Voiceplay Visuals post, but basically he was "one of the screaming high tenors" (Patreon post's words, not mine!), and yeah it shows! That high note on "long live the king!" was hella impressive!

(And if you're thinking "man I kinda wish I could hear more of what Mykal sounds like", first of all, he actually did some covers with Postmodern Jukebox like 7 or 8 years ago (and I apparently have seen one of them before? Watched it by total coincedence at some point? A cover he did of Since You Been Gone). And also, a treat for any of you who've read this far - you might be hearing him with Voiceplay again sooner or later...)

This is actually the third time that Geoff has sung Be Prepared with VoicePlay - the second time was of course the 2019 Aca Top 10 Disney Villains video, but the first time was for VoicePlay's "Once Upon An Ever After" album all the way back in 2012. It was part of a Lion King medley track (just audio, they didn't make a video for it), and so it wasn't the full song (honestly the shift is a little weird, because it jumps from "the lights are not all on upstairs" to "the point that I must emphasise is", like there's no rhyme connection!). Furthermore, the lead was shared between Geoff and Earl, similar to how it was for the Aca Top 10 part. Geoff took the opening verse, Earl took the chorus, and they each got a final line at the end.

And MAN has Geoff come a long way in his vocal abilities since 2012, like yeah duh obviously but STILL.

According to one of the Patrons, the lowest Geoff gets in this one is E1 (via subharmonics of course), and honestly the fact that that's basically child's play for him at this point is crazy. Like I literally had a moment of "oh only down to an E1?" because I know he can go lower, and then was like "wait what do I mean 'only' an E1, that's still objectively low!"

Geoff's voice... what the hell do I say about Geoff's voice? Like the timbre when he's in his upper chest range here, the resonance on the low notes, the GROWLS, like yeah okay obviously I adore his visual performance in the video (and visual everything about him), but that all would be nothing if it didn't come with some of the most amazing vocals you've ever heard in your life!

I love how Geoff goes down on the word "upstairs", and the way he does so with the little growl at the end, oooh it gives me happy shivers!

Low-key funny how there's a sudden low drop on "even you can't be caught unawares", because it does, in fact, catch you unawares (or it did with me anyway!)

Also you'd think I'd fully be used to Geoff's low notes by now, but to steal the phrasing of another reactor I recently started watching, the low drops here are potent! Like literally went down to my stomach (and then some) and even made my heart skip a beat the first couple of watches (and obviously the visuals really help give it a bigger impact).

Oh my god that slow slide down on his last "be prepared" line??? Literally that last syllable alone is stretched out for just a fraction under 10 seconds (I timed it with my phone's stopwatch), INSANE.

I cannot WAIT for reaction videos to this - Kaz, DJ, and Mortius are all gonna lose their goddamn minds!! (Also how many reactions/reaction video titles are gonna include "I was not prepared", lol, low-hanging fruit joke but it's so real)

Alright, I'm off to go watch the video for a third time - this is practically my new Hellfire (said with much love for both - I still love their Hellfire cover a whole lot), and we're not even in October yet!!! (though because of the release delay, we're quite close!)

(As of the public release, I've actually watched this at least half a dozen times, listened to the MP3 track, the karaoke track, and watched the BTS video for this twice. I. Am. Obssessed.)

I'll leave you with a comment and reply from the Patreon post that amused me when I saw it: 😄

[elliespurpleheart]

|| Grief ~ Seokjin oneshot ||

BTS ONESHOT

Summary: Jin x Y/n. Husband x wife.

Alternate universe.

After a tragic incident, the couple struggles to keep going and find their way back to each other.

A/N

!TW! loss, trauma and mention of blood. Don't read if you're uncomfortable.

~ you've been warned lovelies💜 ~

5k words

________________________________________________________________________

The hot water soothed the skin as it trailed down her curves, keeping the hose directed towards her neck as she let her thoughts run wild. The steam covered the glass, increasing the level of heat in the room and blurring the reflection in the mirror.

Passing a hand through her hair, she sighed, closing her eyes in an attempt to relax, letting the droplets soothe the exhaustion from her face.

Tired. Yes she was tired and sleep deprived, and the constant rumbling of thoughts inside her head were definitely not helping.

Maybe things would have been different if they turned back time.

Go back five months ago, when everything was fine. Peaceful happiness and love ran the house. Waking up every morning feeling blessed to see that beloved face next to you, and trying hard not to pinch yourself just to make sure this wasn't just a dream.

Maybe dreams were better in that way. They were fantasies, yet despite the frustration it brought -knowing they would most likely never come true, they remained what they were.

There was no morphing into something different. The pain only came once you woke up. Because then the truth gets revealed in all its ugly and repulsive wholeness. Reality sucked.

She wished this was just a nightmare so she could at least wake up and breathe out in relief, realizing none of it actually happened. Tears no longer brimmed her eyes as her hand caressed the painful part of her body and she clenched her jaw, wishing that at this point, it would all go away. However, despite her body reacting numbly, her heart felt every ounce of pain and it bled, badly.

The water turned off, she stepped out, wrapping herself in her bathrobe tying the knot as someone knocked at the door. She knew exactly who it was and sighed, pressing the water out of her hair and straightening up. "Y/n?"

"What do you want?"she responded tiredly and silence followed before the masculine voice went on, a little tense. "Dinner's ready."

Rolling her eyes, she wiped the steam off the mirror, fixing her hair and retorted. "Could've just started without me."

There was a long pause, until she heard him breathe out, knowing he was rubbing the back of his head with a wince. She didn't have to see it to know.

"I'll serve the wine and wait for the others to arrive."was his final answer and footsteps echoed down the corridor further away.

Letting out a sigh, Y/n closed her eyes for a second, trying hard not to lose it and scream her lungs out before exiting the bathroom.

Seokjin was a busy man, working hard to be in the position he was in. Being the top manager of one of the biggest commercial brand of the country had its perks but never left him time for himself.

His boss was a kind but demanding man. His business flourished thanks to their hard work and strict protocols. Sponsors were generous and in greater number every passing years, conferences were held as their investments turned out successful every time, and it allowed them to contemplate their hard work with a satisfied nod of the head.

Truly, success had become quite recurrent in his working life, and had promptly followed with his love life as he'd married his best friend, soulmate and actual love of his life. He should feel like the happiest man in the world. And he did... once.

They were this happy in love couple, making the most of their wedded life, thriving in this blissful state of marriage. There were a few petty fights they got over rather quickly, working hard to conquer every obstacle.

This time, it was worse, and no matter how much he tried to reassure himself, there did not seem to be a solution anymore as they kept drifting away from each other.

Taking a sip from a glass of wine, the handsome man frowned, clenching his jaw as he tried to push back the searing pain enrapturing his heart. It was like grasping on water or air.

No matter how hard he clenched his fist and tried to keep it close, it ended up slipping through his fingers. Three years of marriage. Could it just end so quickly? Was it possible to fall out of love after six years of being together?

Were they simply tired of each other's presence?

He wasn't.

He knew 'the incident' has scarred them both so badly it turned out as the main reason of their fallout. He remembered the screams, the tears and the way their hands clung to each other.

The moment they heard the tragic sentence, their eyes mirroring the same heartrending pain and horror.

Shutting his eyes close, Jin clenched his jaw, breathing in and out quietly as he quickly wiped the tears from the corner of his eyes. He had to be strong. He had to be there and fight for them, the 'us' they had become a few years ago.

The doorbell rang, pulling him out of his somber thoughts and he set the glass down, reaching to answer the door, composing himself with a smile before opening it wide.

"Seokjin hyung!"the tall man before him greeted with his signature dimple smile, holding out a bottle of champagne. "Namjoon, Mae, good to see you both!"Jin responded, looking at the grinning couple.

Mae smiled gracefully and shook his hand with a few kind words. Letting them in, the man of the house led them to the dining room, doing the usual mundane talk about the family, work and the latest news.

After a few minutes Y/n appeared, beautifully yet simply dressed with a black dress nicely tracing her curves and reaching just above the knee, with heels, and a pin holding up her curls reaching beneath the shoulders.

Jin watched as she greeted their friend, and his face fell at the empty smile she gave them. Her skin was a shade paler than it used to be, she had lost quite some weight and her eyes were tired.

He knew he'd grown even thinner than he used to be as well, and he could feel the exhaustion weighing on his shoulders and eyelids, and he wondered where it all went wrong, why he wasn't capable of holding them together. There was no bond, no special comprehension between them anymore, it was just mystery and darkness shading their thoughts.

The dinner was awfully long and y/n could feel her eyelids grow heavy, wishing nothing more than to lie down and sleep. Glancing at her husband from across the table, she watched as he laughed with his friend, before jumping in on a project he had had in mind for the past few days.

"What about you, Y/n? I heard you made quite the accomplishment last month!"Mae spoke up, pulling her out of her rambling thoughts. Turning to the gracious woman, she smiled and shook her head.

"That is flattering but we were a whole team on the project. We did get mind blowing results though."

And so the conversation stirred, Namjoon and Jin joined in, discussing business and then moving on to more casual subjects.

"How's Lily?"Jin inquired politely and watched as the couple grinned proudly.

"She's very well, and growing beautifully! She's always waddling around now that she knows how to walk it's very endearing."

Namjoon nodded his head, throwing in a few anecdotes about her activities which clearly implied that she had inherited her father's clumsiness, much to Mae's dismay, as she lost count of how many objects had met their tragic end on the house floor or in other random situations.

Y/n simply nodded, numbly listening and wishing to be miles away. The dinner ended nicely and the couple left, leaving her alone with her husband who sighed, rubbing on his nape as he made his way back into the living room.

Now what.

Now silence.

Confrontation?

Y/n made her way back to the table, taking ahold of her glass of wine and taking another sip, looking lost in her own thoughts. Her eyes stared into a mass of void, as she contemplated options, replaying tonight's diner, and a certain glint sparked in her eyes, anger, envy, and harsh feelings towards herself and the world.

Their penthouse offered a beautiful view of the shimmering city lights barely hidden by the garden trees. The neighborhood was peaceful and quiet and they had little to complain regarding their financial situation. Taking another sip of her wine, the young woman took the time to swallow, and spoke up with a knowing tone.

"Well they certainly looked happy."

Jin froze, staring at her for a few seconds as she turned around to face him and added bitterly, raising her eyebrows to make a point.

"One happy couple. Oh wait, I meant, happy family, you know... with the kids."

This hurt more than it should have.

"Y/n don't."he sighed, frowning slightly and setting a cup on the kitchen counter.

"Don't what, Jin?"she cut off dryly. "State facts??"

Closing his eyes shut for a second, Jin let out a breath, trying to control his emotions. He didn't want to snap and get into another fight. That's what they did everytime they talked, unenlightened of what the other was truly feeling.

"Don't start an argument, please."

Chuckling to herself, Y/n shook her head with a shrug, unbothered by the provocative words hurting both herself and her husband.

"It's true, though, isn't it?"

Refusing to answer the question as he knew the answer too well, the young man busied himself by clearing the table and filling their dish washer. Exhausted as he was, he didn't have the courage to confront her and keep up with her arguments. 

None of it would come out as helpful. If only... if only they could turn back time. Go back to these happy times as a newly wedded couple, before it all happened. 

How much he longed to hold her, lean on her and let her lean on him. Be the couple they always were and not this.. wreck of a couple they had become. Guilt gripped on his heart almost fiercely, eating him alive these days. They were both tired and uncommunicative.

"They're happy."she went on emptying her glass and setting it down on the table.

"They looked happy, healthy... they have as much as we do on a practical scale. Oh and how amazing of their little Lily to be walking now, right?"she spoke louder with a sarcastic smile.

"What's your point, Y/n?"he snapped. "Yes, their child is doing well, and we rejoiced for them, because they're our friends."

Narrowing her eyes at the man, she froze, taking in slow breaths as she processed her husband's statement. It echoed in her mind for a few seconds, and he wished to take it back, cursing his coping mechanism for voicing that out.

"We.. rejoiced..."she repeated numbly. A strange smile made its way to her face, highliting the paleness of her face.

"Yeah..."she whispered with a scoff. "Yeah. We did that."

Confusion flashed in his eyes as he stared back, somehow knowing what she was implying but refusing to admit it. A blockade had become necessary, to protect her and himself. The emotions, the pain were all too strong to feel and not let it consume him.

How many days had gone by for them to drift away so quickly? So definitively it would seem. Three years ago, they were unbeatable, strong and united. They sealed their love forever and beyond and looked towards the future with joyful anticipation.

And now there they were, tired, more different than ever, scarred from the past and terrified of the future together... or not together? 

They spent their days working, busying themselves as much as they could and spending as little time together as possible, and that was after hesitantly avoiding each other... It tore their marriage apart.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh really, what do I mean?Are you seriously telling me you don't get what I'm saying?!"

"NO I don't understand you, Y/n, I don't, not anymore! We never talk, we never communicate and things don't work out as they used to."Jin snapped angrily. "What do you want me to do??"he went on."I've tried to reach out to you for a long time, but you kept pushing me away and look where we are now."

"So this is my fault?"

"That's not what I'm saying!"he retorted impatiently.

"Then what ARE you saying?"she provoked uselessly.

"I'm saying we don't WORK!"

Silence replaced the harsh words as their eyes met, wide, and glistening with hurt. Y/n's numb expression faded and pain etched on her face.

"What the hell-"she muttered before gritting her teeth. "If it's a divorce that you want then FINE!"she yelled out exhausted of the never ending arguments.

In two long strides, Jin crossed the room, standing closer and she took in the pale color of his skin as well as the more defined tracing of his cheekbones. Guilt kept eating her alive as she processed her husband's state for the nth time. Divorce had never been an option and never would be.

The emotions were too much and she had no idea what to do with it all anymore. Loneliness weighed on her shoulders so heavily it terrified her to even think he might go with the divorce idea. Jin was the love of her life, her soulmate and she could never imagine her life without him.

"Divorce?"he repeated, mirroring her fear of the idea. Shaking his head, the young man frowned deeply. "I don't want us to get separated, I want us to COMMUNICATE. I want you to TALK to me. Ever since-"

"Don't."she cut off in a shaky voice.

"We've never talked about this!"he insisted but she shook her head firmly while taking a step back. "Don't."she repeated almost pleadingly.

"We need to talk about it. I'm sick of avoiding everything now, I'm sick of not knowing what's going on in your life, wondering pointlessly if there could be anything I could do to help, to be there for you as I should! I'm your husband and yet I can't even hold you the nights you cry yourself to sleep because we don't even sleep in the same room. We keep driving each other insane because we refuse to communicate, and frankly, I'm done with it!"

"I said I don't want to talk about it! I can't okay?!"her eyes glistened with tears as she yelled. "It's too fucking painful and I can't face it!"

"What if I need to talk about it, what if I need to share this with you, and what if I actually want to, because we promised to be there for each other for the better and for the worst. So far, this is the worst! And all of it is a fucking failure! I know you're in pain and so am I!"

"If you really need to talk about it then go see a therapist or a doctor, I'm done with this!"she cried stomping away and absentmindedly clearing the kitchen counter, putting away stuff, while Jin followed, frustrated, hurt and angry.

"I don't want some therapist I want YOU. My wife. I need you. My therapist doesn't know what it's like and we've gone through the whole trauma together. SO PLEASE, just talk to me!"

Y/n remained silent, putting away the last glass and desperately trying to contain her emotions. Jin quickly walked around the counter to the other side.

"You don't want to, fine I'll go first. I'm in pain! I'm hurting so bad I can't even imagine what it must be like for you. And it kills me to think that there is nothing I can do to ease your pain. If I could take it all away I would. But you push me away! You isolate yourself whenever you can and you think it'll all disappear in the snap of  the fingers. But it won't! Look around you! This isn't a nightmare, a dream, it's fucking real, the pain is real and we both need to wake the hell up!"

Pausing for a few seconds, the young man stared at his wife painfully, in between guilt and reproach.

"We've left each other space but we've gone too far... And now I'm scared we might never be able to go back! So PLEASE, work with me here!"

"WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY??!"she cried suddenly with tears in her eyes, facing her husband with all the emotions carefully bottled up over time.

"That I am unhappy?! That I still can't grasp why it happened to US of all people, or that I question myself EVERY SINGLE FUCKING day how I'm going to live with myself?! Should I tell you how much I hated having our friends over tonight?? You wanna know WHY?!"she yelled out, trying to stand strong and steady.

"Because I fucking envy them! Because I WANT what they have, I want what WE would've had if-..."her voice cracked and she broke down, tears rolling down her face.

Jin's face fell, furrowing his eyebrows in an attempt to grasp the wholeness of her words. The nothing but painful look in her eyes made him realize that there was a lot he didn't know, a lot they'd hidden from each other.

Covering her mouth with the back of her hand trying to hold back her sobs, Y/n swallowed, meeting his eyes with a shameful expression.

"I want-"her voice broke once more and she finished barely audible, "I want our baby back..."

The silence which followed that statement held more pain than any words they could have said. The painful event replayed in their minds, the cries, the white walls, the sentence they had feared to hear, the moment it happened. All of it.

Y/n's hand instinctively reached for her belly, as though the pain had awaken in there once more. Jin stood there, heart aching, muscles tensing up.

"I've hated myself every second, since then."she confessed through the tears, finally sharing that weight on her heart.

"I've lost our baby... and he couldn't even be born..."

To say Jin was stunned by her words would be an understatement. Never had he imagined she'd blame herself for this. Yet he wondered how he hadn't realized it before.

"I can't help but think if I'd been more careful, if I'd gone more often to check on the baby's vitals, maybe we would've found something and managed to save the baby. But I didn't! I. Didn't. And now you're a childless father. We're a childless couple."

His heart sunk and tears welled up his eyes at the pain he was currently witnessing and feeling. No, this was wrong, this was so terribly wrong.

His eyes travelled from her hand holding her belly, up to her face stained with tears.

Still astounded by the sudden information, Jin swallowed as he made his way to her, clenching his jaw hard. His hands held her shoulders steadily while he spoke, wanting his words to be carefully heard and understood.

"Y/n, listen to me."he began with all the seriousness in the world, fighting the tears. "You are NOT responsible for this. Don't you think for one minute that anyone should blame you. Our precious little Haru.. was never born but because of his health. He was sick. Very sick, okay? This was not due to a lack of precaution from your side."

Lifting her head to meet his eyes, the young woman sniffled, no more hiding her emotions and that brokenhearted sadness she'd managed to disguise all these days suddenly became visible as it filled her eyes.

She'd spent days, pretending to be doing all right, and avoiding her husband at all cost. She'd soon found it harder and harder to look him in the eye, convinced that she'd failed him, failed them. Directing the blame towards herself, she found it impossible to forgive herself after inflicting him so much pain. And that baby... never got a chance to live. Their baby...

But how naive of her to think the one person who knew her that well would fall for it. To her, Jin had also recoiled in his shell, and maybe they'd silently agreed to let the other mourn, believing they had to carry their own burden alone. How wrong were they, and they both seemed to realize it only now.

"Y/n, I could never blame you for this. If anything I've been blaming myself for not taking better care of you."he confessed in return. She flinched at these words and let out a shaky breath with a small shake of the head.

Her hand cupped his face while her eyes scanned his features pleadingly, forgetting the argument for a second and focusing solely on the man standing before her.

"No Jin please, you cannot blame yourself for this, you've taken better care of me than anyone could have ever done."

"This is neither your fault or mine."he spoke up gravely. "Haru was in a terrible condition, there was nothing we could do."

Tears resurfaced in their eyes at the mention of these tragic days. They held onto each other for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

"Do you hear me?"he added in a low voice, trying to hold back his own tears while he stared at his wife who nodded almost regretfully.

"I'm so so sorry.."she whispered, breaking down with a sob and this time, Jin's heart could no longer handle it. The tears rolled down his face with his heart breaking a little more. His arms immediately wrapped themselves around her trembling body. "No no no... no please don't say that, Y/n... please...I'm sorry too.. no one should have to go through what we've suffered. But I hope and I want to believe that he's in a great place where he is now."

Like a dam breaking down, she finally gave in. The tears flowed as sobs racked her body pressed against his chest with her arms folded against herself. Her hands closed on the material of his jumper, heartbroken, all the masks were down.. all that was left were just them, painfully scarred and trying to keep standing and keep going for the sake of each other.

Jin tightened his hold, as though he could carry both of their burden to lighten the weight on her heart. He wanted her to know he was there, he was never letting go, not ever again and they'd get through this.

"I miss him too.."he whispered, kissing the top of her head, closing his eyes with a released sigh.

None of them knew how long they remained in each other's embrace. And frankly, neither of them really cared. They'd been needing it for so long, after watching the other fall apart little by little, incapable of doing anything to prevent it.

_________________

_________________________

Flashback

Y/n pushed the branch out of the way and reached out to cut the lily, humming softly to herself. They were her favorite flower and she wanted the baby to see those when he'd first come home.

Just as she cut the rod, a searing pain tore inside her body, making her drop the scissors and stumble back with wide eyes. A groan escaped her mouth, hands reaching for her belly. Her lips parted and her mouth hung open, pain etched on her features. Heavy grunts of pain rose from the depth of her lungs.

A warm substance slid down her thighs and she gasped at the blood staining her clothes. Stumbling back she let out a raw cry. "SEOKJIN!"

"JIN HELP!!"she screamed in terror and pain, calling out his name again and again.

Eyes wide and heart beating faster than ever, Jin burst through the doors outside, rushing to his wife. "I'm here! I'm here! What's going on?! What is it?! Talk to me! Y/n-"

His words died in his throat at the sight of the blood and her hands grabbed onto him, eyes pleading desperately as she sobbed. "I CAN'T FEEL HIM ANYMORE!! Something's wrong! Jin something happened! Why can't I feel it anymore what happened-"

"What can't you feel Y/n, I don't-"

"THE BABY!"she yelled out with a sob. All blood drained from his face, and he had to gather all his strength not to freak out.

"All right, let's get you to the hospital."he said immediately swooping her in his arms and rushing to the car, seating her in the back, being as gentle as possible.

...........

Y/n was quickly lay down on a bed and carried through the hall to the ER where the doctors immediately took her in. Her hand never let go of Jin's hold.

It all happened so fast, the surgery, the struggle in order to save the baby, and the moment she woke up, feeling Jin's hand in hers, while his face rested on the mattress wet with tears. The unbearable pain in her heart, that emptiness she felt as her eyes scanned his face desperately. The shake of the head meant everything he couldn't word out.

"No.."she gasped, tears in her eyes while a lump formed in her throat. "No, no, Seokjin tell me this isn't-...."

It was when Jin burst in tears while holding her hand that she realized it. Her hand covered her belly, and her heart bled in the most painful way. This couldn't be... panic rose in her chest, her heart stopped and all she could do was stare in shock, while something tore inside of her.

Shaking her head in denial, a painful cry escaped her lips, vision blurred with tears. "NO! NO THIS ISN'T TRUE! NOOOO!"She screamed out in distress,  sobs now racking her body as she struggled to get out of bed despite the pain, wanting to do something, anything to change this reality.

Jin sprang to his feet, keeping her down, talking to her continuously, trying to find some words but she heard nothing. "MY BABY! GIVE ME BACK MY BABY! I WANNA SEE THE DOCTOR! LET ME GO I WANNA SEE THE DOCTOR! I NEED TO SEE MY BABY!"she yelled desperate as two nurses and a doctor burst into the room in order to stop her from hurting herself even more by standing and walking around.

"Mrs Kim-"the doctor attempted.

"MY BABY, WHERE IS HE?! I WANT MY CHILD I WANT my child..."she sobbed loudly, head falling back onto the mattress as she gave in, the pain consuming her while Jin wrapped her in his embrace, keeping her tight in his hold, wanting to keep her together.

His tears joined hers, and her arms held onto his, reaching to get a grasp on something strong, on her rock to stop the free falling.

"Please! Please... Haruya.."she whimpered, the surgery still affecting her and she felt a wave of exhaustion wash over her, numb with the pain.

Jin just held her. He'd heard the sentence from the doctor, and leaned against the wall, trying not to collapse as his heart broke into pieces. The long hours waiting for his wife to wake up..  the moment she'd learn the tragedy...

And he'd never been ready for this. No one ever would be. He'd just swore to himself to be there, to stand strong for them both. The doctor remained standing for a few minutes, painfully watching the couple alongside the nurses.

"I'm terribly sorry for your loss."he could only say to the mourning couple. With a nod of the head, they all left the room. Y/n was a sobbing mess, eyes closing shut and tears continuously streaming down her face. That was it. He was gone. The only thing they had left was that question : WHY? Why them? Why Haru?...

The sun set that day, and that reality never shifted. That's when they realized the painful fact that they were going to have to live on. Keep going...

________________________________________________________________

Stepping out of the shower, Y/n entered the room and spotted Jin already there in his pajamas. How she'd missed having him there. She didn't have to be alone during the darkest moment of the day anymore and neither did he.

Sending him a weak smile, she followed and slipped under the covers, lying down on the clean sheets. They turned around, facing each other in silence for a moment, carefully processing the evening, and what they'd discovered of each other.

"How about we go see Haru tomorrow?"Jin murmured with sad eyes. "Take the day off, and rest? We haven't gone to the cemetery together ever since the funeral."

Tears rolled down her face and she bit down on her bottom lip, nodding quietly. "Yeah,.. we'll go together."she whispered in response.

Nodding in the silence, Jin gazed at her fondly as she reached out, wiping a tear from his cheek and drawing a strand of hair out of his forehead.

"We're gonna be okay, aren't we?"

"Yeah, we're strong... and Haru.. Haru's in a better place."Jin assured, wanting to believe it. His hand reached for hers, intertwining their fingers together, their eyes never leaving each other.

"Thank you, for staying, for being there eventhough I was far from being the perfect wife..."

"There's no such thing, my darling."he murmured softly. "I love you, and you're all I need. We'll go on, together. I'm not leaving. Ever."he promised, his eyes plunged into hers, pouring in that promise. "We'll have our family, and Haru will be watching over us all. He'll be our little angel."

Scooting closer, Y/n sighed, snuggling against her husband, her rock and soulmate, as he pressed a meaningful kiss on her forehead. "I love you."she murmured, feeling lighter and strangely more at peace. She wasn't alone, neither was he. They had each other, and that way, life could go on... with remembrance of the past and confidence in the future.

Things would get better.