#i'll (probably) give them happy endings tho don't worry!

[velvetures]

Honorifics

A/N: Yeah... I don't know about this. I'll probably take it down since I'm unsure if it's got enough of a consistent vibe. Let me know if it's actually something you enjoy since I don't write angst or hurt/comfort often. I ALWAYS WRITE HAPPY ENDINGS THO. That's a damn promise. Summary: You've given Ghost a title he hates, and takes it out on you. The situation goes too far, and you're both left trying to figure it out. Reader is nicknamed "Brass" since she's a long-distance shooter/sniper. T/W: angst, cursing, Ghost being an emotionally unstable human, yelling, the reader having a breakdown, smidge of not eating, smidge of not drinking anything, comfort, feelings, female reader, not proofread.

When you joined the task force, things didn’t exactly go as smoothly as you had hoped it would. Training sessions usually ended up with you either getting your ass beat or nearly surviving a full-on embarrassment by the skin of your teeth just to be told that you still weren’t in good enough shape to keep up with them in the field. Surely being a woman didn’t excuse you from being in shape for the kind of work Laswell and Price had brought you in for, but damn if it wasn’t difficult to try and have a one-on-one fight with someone like Soap or Ghost without the benefit you would typically have in a real-world battle situation. The reality that all of the men in the squad were literally the best of the best aside, there could be just barely enough room for you to compete on the same level when it came to sheer physical strength. While that wasn’t your specialty anyway, the Captain made it clear you needed to prove you could handle your own against serious physical fights without assistance. After nearly five weeks of having one of your squad mates slam you on your ass one too many times in the training hall, you finally were able to prove to Price that you could go out in the field and he didn’t have to extend any extra worries for your ability to survive.

Logistically as a sniper, it meant you frequently held a much more distant role in missions. By watching from a scope you could ensure that infiltrations, covert ops, and other hush-hush kinds of operations that typically the 141 wouldn’t have the luxury of. Being the skilled marksman you were, it made sense to take advantage of your talents and also extend you a job that progressed past what you’d experienced in your “standard” military career and multiple tours overseas. However, that meant communications were essentially the backbone of your usefulness aside from your rifle. Next to nothing else, your daily and mission-based work almost exclusively went through Lieutenant Ghost. Which… often proved to be the largest obstacle that you faced aside from making sure that your scope didn’t get bumped off sight the -often- rough flights and drives to insertion points.

The Lieutenant was particularly mean… he certainly didn’t give a single thought to if anyone thought that he was a little too harsh of a personality to swallow. That went for everything you came to learn about Ghost. From his lack of willingness to speak unless required of him, to his unique ability of appearing and disappearing from anywhere without the slightest sound or hint of where he’d come from or gone to. Trained as a distance marksman, even you were impressed that such a massive man could move around like smoke on water. That and his physical appearance; good god above. Surely a man like Ghost had never graced the face of the Earth before, else he’d have been just as mythical in his legendary life and would’ve been known by thousands of people. He stood towering over just about everyone, in whatever room he was in, and compared to your own height it was downright laughable the difference between the two of you as operators.

The one thing that made the biggest impression on you after meeting the Lieutenant was his voice and how he spoke. That thick accent always sounded rough and a little gritty. His deep timbre gave such a commanding authority that if given the choice between getting yelled at by Captain Price or Ghost… there was no choice you’d sit for hours listening to Price threaten you over Ghost. He just sounded so scary and attractive all at the same time. Unsurprisingly, it developed into a subconscious dynamic where you saw Ghost as such a superior officer -and human- that no matter how much you liked to daydream about Ghost in less-than-professional situations… You gave him the utmost respect at all times. Easiest of all to recognize was that from day one, you had never addressed Ghost to his face as anything other than ‘sir’. Not even his rank gave enough nuance to his character and presence, so for you, Ghost was inextricably attached to the name.

Ghost however… didn’t like it.

Such a simple address actually made Ghost grit his teeth beneath the shield of his mask. When he heard you call him that, he automatically related it to how he had called General Shepherd ‘sir’ as a subtle sign of mockery and defiance. Thinking about that made him more than necessarily angry and confused, but he couldn’t really accuse you of having ever been given much of a reason to detest him. Therefore, he had to come to the conclusion that you were doing it out of some kind of respect that a drill sergeant or boot camp instructor had bashed into your brain so hard that it stuck permanently. Not surprising since you were much different from the rest of the task force. Yet he had to revise that after the first six months of you being with them permanently. You had gotten settled in. Enough so that you called the Captain, ‘Cap’… Soap, ‘Johnny’… and Garrick, ‘Gaz’ like everyone else did. Exceptionalities only appeared when it came time for you to be around him or have any sort of interaction that wasn’t the occasional silent nod of acknowledgment when walking past each other in the hallways.

He honestly tried to ignore it and you altogether for that matter in an attempt to keep his bitter anger at a minimum. Seeing such a small and fucking happy woman always lingering around somewhere in the corners of his sight couldn’t be anything but a distraction waiting to happen. A bad habit that he didn’t have the mental capacity or emotional willingness to take on. Fuck… he already had to worry about the 141 as a whole, to begin with. Now you on top of that? It was more responsibility than he’d signed up for initially. Hearing you call him ‘sir’ day in and day out began to take its toll on his self-control. Ghost needed to either find out why you were hellbent on calling him that, or at least be enough of a bastard to you to be reassured that you did it because you wanted a polite way to tell him to shove it up his ass sideways.

The Lieutenant had been being nothing short of a prick in the last few months.

He was making paperwork back at HQ a nightmare that couldn’t be solved alternatively through someone like Gaz or Soap who often didn’t mind playing the part of the unbiased third party. Refusing to sign things when you stopped by his office, outright ignoring your necessary questions, and stonewalling you at every single stop along the way just to yield at the last moment and do everything you’d been asking for so the both of you wouldn’t face heat from any higher-ups. That alone was enough for you to consider talking to Soap privately since he knew Ghost the best… but you’d kept putting it off hoping that it was just a passing phase of shitty attitude.

Your patience and emotional strength fell through the floor after attempting for the third time in a week after something so fucking simple as trying to get his approval and official signature on a post-mission report Price had delegated to you after being called to Washington D.C. for a meeting. It wasn’t a major task, but knowing that the Captain had given you the responsibility first over anyone else made you want to impress him and take care of business without incident. God forbid you do something as simple as ask Ghost to pick up a pen and scribble his name at the bottom of a page so that you could send it on through the higher-up channels. It resulted in the Lieutenant straight-up yelling at you in the middle of the hallway outside his office when he’d found you standing there patiently waiting for him to show up. He wasn’t threatening physically, but it cut much deeper into your pride and feelings than it should have.

With every word that dripped venomously out of his masked mouth, you lost a little extra peace of mind on having such an untouchable and unshakably good opinion of Ghost for so long. This moment of undeserved verbal punishment was enough to make the corners of your eyes burn with inner disgrace, self-doubt, and plain old sadness which motivated you to get the hell out of there before the Lieutenant saw you cry. When you turned your back and walked away right in the middle of his berating for you being “too fucking annoying to tolerate”, your only destination was your personal quarters on the other end of the building where a lock on the door could shut out the entire base for as long as you saw fit. Upon the first estimation, it would be after Captain Price returned so that you could have at least one single chance at not getting a second punishment or dismissal from the squad. The sound of your door slamming shut and your back sliding down against it on your way down to the floor silenced the entire room around you, leaving just enough room for the papers clenched to your chest to flutter onto the ground and your weak cries to sounds amplified.

It was hours before you could drag yourself off the floor and into bed, too tired and wanting to fall back on the trained and instinctual desire to hide away somewhere isolated and not move for hours on end. Being a long-distance marksman gave you the talent of patience insurmountable to the average person, allowing days to pass by without you needing to do more than go to the bathroom before coming right back to a motionless position. That’s what you wanted tonight. You needed to focus all of your energy into your brain alone and use it to sort through the hurt burning through your eyes and throat, and the questioning that gave such a sickening feeling a chance root in your stomach. Questions of if it had been foolish to trust Ghost as much as you did the others, knowing how you’d been warned that he would be difficult to work with. Hoping you hadn’t been truly so ignorant of judging behavior to think that the Lieutenant was something much greater than his behavior had been not only today but for the past months.

The next two days were spent laying near motionless… not hungry or thirsty.

Just thinking, sleeping, and staring at the wall across from your bed.

A solid knock on your door was the first human sound that hadn’t been made by you in over forty-eight hours. You’d not looked at your phone or any communications since locking yourself inside, and there was a good chance someone from the squad had come searching for you after such a long period without seeing or hearing from you. When you refused to answer right away, another harder knock banged on the door twice and rattled the steel in its doorframe. Impatient. Testy. Quite familiar with everything you’ve been through lately. Recognizing the Lieutenant was the one outside made your gut churn all over again. Questioning whether to get up or not wasn’t hard. Laying perfectly still in bed, you waited. If you were being honest though, it’d been a long time since you’d spent so long restricting yourself from basic needs for the purpose of acting like a living phantom. Close to three years since any sniper position had left you utterly abandoned without resources. Only this time it was self-induced and nothing short of a trauma response you wanted to hide away from. Truthfully you couldn’t tell if walking to the door was an easy feat or not. After not drinking anything, using the bathroom wasn’t necessary and the last time you’d stood up didn’t cross your memory clearly.

Ghost slammed his fist against the door again one last time. But he didn’t wait long enough for you to answer before rattling the handle to the door with a heavy sigh that was audible through the cracks separating you. Metal on metal gritted softly and moved the door handle a bit further. Recognizing that as nothing short of Ghost picking the lock to your quarters without the slightest care of how he’d be breaking multiple stipulations laid out for them living in HQ. Either your physical or mental state kept you from giving a damn when the handle gave way fully, leaving a bright fluorescence light flooding in from the hallway into your pitch-black room. It made your eyes water and the urge to turn your head away was strong enough to budge your head into the blankets and pillow surrounding. Heavy boots made the paperwork scattered on the floor crunch softly and the sound of his deep breaths gave away his current state of frustration. Clearly not appreciating being locked out of a room that he had no fucking business being in. A long pause led to shuffling around, and the sound of your desk chair creaking under his weight.

“Gonna say somethin’?” He sounded no less irritated than the last time you’d spoken.

It made your throat burn to even think you’d allowed his to get in your head so deeply just to utterly rip every last bit of security and respect away from you for no damn reason. Your silence made quite the statement, even if the actual task of speaking hadn’t been a totally voluntary one. You’d not moved your jaw in days at this point.

“You’ve missed five drill sessions, two mandatory meetings, and one phone from General Shepherd.”

Listing off your offenses hardly bothered you. The consequences of this had been fully accepted days ago, and Ghost would have to do a lot more to get you up from this bed. You’d trained for hell, and no matter how badly Ghost had ruined your almost loving and patient view of him there weren’t enough men on the planet to make you get up voluntarily. Drastic… yes. Satisfying to your own pride… undoubtedly. When you didn’t even let out a single breath loud enough for Ghost to hear instead of that instant apology or willingness to appease him… please him even, with that little quip of ‘sir’ ready on your tongue, the Lieutenant was up out of that chair so quickly you heard it roll into the wall behind him hard enough to thud against the drywall.

“Goddamn it Brass, I demand a fuckin’ answer!” His loud bark caught your attention, but the feeling of your blankets being ripped off your body was a far more startling sensation.

Baring you to the cold air of the room, all your body managed was to raise chills on your skin in a feeble attempt to keep you warm or alert you to seek out that heat again. Tension exploded into shocked silence when Ghost didn’t utter more than a sharp inhale after getting one, shadowed glimpse of your body totally frozen on your stomach. You knew it couldn’t look great. Snipers could come back looking like skeletons sometimes after a long mission if they were given the orders to stay put. You’d not been laying nearly long enough for that to be the case, but dehydration was certainly a symptom you were ignoring quite easily, as well as the possibility of some minor pressure ulcers that would linger for a few weeks if you didn’t move soon. Ghost wasn’t as familiar with the sight of how you felt internally. Snipers weren’t commonly used or in collaboration with Task Force 141. You’d been their first real look at how the inner workings moved or didn’t, and much of your personal way of doing things had dispelled or blown away any misguided assumptions they’d made about your skills early on. Viewing a sniper after days of doing literally nothing, of her own free will…? That wasn’t healthy or accepted in general military companies. Lucky Ghost got the front-row seat though.

When you heard his movement next to you, weight pressed down the mattress at your side in the shape of his hands, and a low sigh registered.

“Brass…” Failing to even say something, you wondered if your own assessment of yourself wasn’t accurate. “It’s been five days.” His faltered tone was truthful, and it destroyed your semblance of time that had been misled by the absence of sunlight coming in through your room.

You thought about trying to say something, resolve falling flat when swallowing felt difficult. A gloved hand rested against your thigh and Ghost almost growled again, sounding a lot more like he was resisting the urge to squeeze you hard. Only his fingers traced along your hip and over the curve in your waist with a tense and heavy swallow. He was being gentle beyond your concept of his depth of emotion and understanding. Nearly loving as he paused over your ribcage with another pinched sort of sound. Staying like that for what felt like hours, you struggled to keep yourself awake. It had been a struggle to move your tongue in your mouth, testing what mobility you’d lost in the short term. Only Ghost wasn’t leaving like you expected, and suddenly his voice returned it its normal stature.

“This’s Ghost. Get a bay ready now, I’m bringin’ someone in.” The reverb of his voice crackled in a radio you knew hooked to his vest. A backup short-range alternative in the case that SAT couldn’t be established or wasn’t clear enough to rely on in the field. Apparently, he used it to keep in contact with someone on base. Or multiple people for all you knew.

“Copy Ghost.” A static voice could be heard and quickly the room was pitched back into a silence you wanted to remain in, but Ghost was adamant to keep infracting alone with a whole list of other rules that, for whatever reason, just didn’t fucking matter or apply to him.

His other hand searched around the dark until he found your face resting amongst the fabric of your bed, curling his hand around your head and meticulously lifting you so very slowly away from the bed with his other arm steadying your legs that had also been taken up off the mattress. You’d never touched Ghost once in all the time you’d known him. Understanding that with his sour attitude, there couldn’t be a single chance in Hell that touching him was an acceptable action. Whereas with Soap, Gaz, and even on occasion Price: hugs, handshakes, shoves, and other physical touches were common, Ghost totally ignored all human contact. Maybe Hell had frozen over outside of your quarters for your weak and still motionless body to be lifted up against the Lieutenant’s chest and carried preciously outside of your room into the burning light of HQ. His chest heaved deep and quickly against you. Both hands curled around you and flexed tighter each time you were able to hear another set of shoes approaching closer to you. Possessive like a soldier. Silent like a Ghost. Determined.

He takes you straight to the medical hall where three nurses and two of the on-shift doctors are fast to respond to your condition. Only Ghost refuses to let them take you away from him for any reason. Stoically stonewalling them just like he habitually did to you as they begged him to lay you down on a transport bed so they could take you back to a room for assessment. The Lieutenant took you there himself, with the group of nurses and doctors hot on his heels and surrounding your bed once Ghost had you settled down inside a private room.

The whole place smells sterile and like alcohol. It’s not the first time you’ve been here, but these are far different circumstances. You’re still too sensitive to open your eyes, but hands are all over your body, gloves fingers touching around the sore places on weight-bearing points on your body, pricks in your fingertips, and a needle poke to the back of your hand. It’s overstimulating, to say the least, and you’re worried they’re going to think you’ve tried to starve yourself to death or decided that living altogether wasn’t worth it and simply wasting away into your bed was the solution. Right away, one of the voices of the medical professionals breaks that worry in your mind by calling for some of the tests to be staggered, needing time between them for nothing other than your own benefit.

“Treat this no differently than prolonged active reconnaissance,” The female voice states softly. “Being on-the-gun for this long is detrimental to all senses, and she’s going to need a while to wake up in a meaningful way.” She added, voice coming clearer the closer she got to your head.

“You’ve been working very hard, I suspect. Maybe not in the field… but you’re one tough lady.” She commented to you quite personally, her hand falling to your shoulders. “We’re going to get you plenty of fluids and start you on a vitamin drip to get everything running as it should again. You’ve also got some slight bedsores, but as long as we take care of them now, you’ll be right as rain soon, sniper.”

Tests were run, treatments began, and nurse after nurse was brought in with both doctors running rotations in and out of your room for the rest of the night. All of them were under the hard watch of Ghost who’d not moved from his position sitting in the corner of your room where he could see not only you but anyone approaching the door. He’d been very quiet throughout the process, watching and waiting for someone to give him some news about your condition with actual certainty. Stewing over the guilt he felt knowing damn well he was the reason you’d shut down so far and were still unable -or unwilling- to come out of it yet. You’d been nothing but the perfect little woman, doing her job with skill and grace, making everyone around you happier just with one glance in your direction. But fuck, he couldn’t stand seeing someone do the callous profession of killing people with one single squeeze of her finger and still have so much innocent and emotional humanity inside such a small body. Ghost couldn’t wrap his mind around it. So instead of trying to do the right thing and figure it out, he did what a man so out of touch with empathy did: Try to snuff it out.

You threatened him whether you or he realized it in the beginning.

But now he could see it with that crystal fucking clear hindsight. How monstrous he was for punishing you with no foundation other than his own selfish fear of seeing a dynamic he didn’t know was possibly wrapped up inside of you. Sweet and little you, never saying anything to him other than a ‘yes sir’ or ‘no sir’. Goddamnit Ghost knew he’d nearly killed you in a way. Seeing days of neglect in your sallow expression, darkened under eyes, and weakened body was more than even his cold heart could take all at one time. Wasting away for someone as useless as himself, all because he’d never given you enough credit for finding something worth liking in him where no one else had. Screaming at you. Cursing your existence. Right in your face, while he’d been too big of a pussy to even take off his own mask he hid behind every day as he utterly destroyed your meaningful position and life working alongside of his and his squad. Owing you his life wouldn’t nearly cover his offenses. Laughably, Ghost admitted his own life or death couldn’t measure up to yours. So instead of saying any kind of bullshit apology, he sat in the corner of your room and denied himself sleep, food, and water because there wasn’t anything else he could do until you’d been considered healthy and strong again.

Almost one week to the day you had been signed off for return to duty with zero restrictions. Your physical and mental evaluations came back clean, and with both Price and Ghost signing off on the doctor’s orders, you returned to your quarters where you expected to see your room exactly as you’d left it before Ghost brought you into the medical wing. Only nothing was as you’d left it. All the paperwork left on the floor was gone, as well as the other documents that had been left on your desk that still needed finishing. All of it was gone. Your bed and all of the bedclothes you’d been taken from were also missing. Replaced with totally brand new bedding in dark hues of dark green and navy blue with a decidedly feminine pattern on the quilt. Items you didn’t own. Or have any idea where they came from. Even the smell of stale air was traded for a woody, and familiar smell that wasn’t of a candle, or room spray; It was from a person. The person who sat in the corner of your room in your desk chair with his massive arms crossed over his chest and dark eyes staring at you through the painted visage of a skull gracing a black compression mask.

“Sir,” You greet hoarsely, still working through some of the non-significant parts of your recovery that lingered. Ghost stood from his seat and met you halfway across your room with a silent nod, his hand reaching out and motioning for you to step closer to him. Warily but complicit, you make the few steps forward and watch his hand turn to slide against your jaw and stay there firmly. “I expected you to be at drill.” You say with a tinge of surprise at the touch of his bare hand resting against your cheek.

“Should be,” He replied flatly. “But I’m not.” You nod a little, biting your tongue when his fingertip rubs over the curve of your ear. His eyes were soft and his unarmored physique was highlighted by the shadows made by the lamp on your side table. He’s inspecting you, you know as much. Clear by his thumb pressing over your pulse point and the minute exactly that he waits before speaking again.

“Do you like the color green?” His question knocks you off guard and his eyes slide over the quilt laying neatly over your bed. You were quick to answer honestly out of mere habit.

“Yes, sir.”

His hand stiffens against your cheek, and Ghost takes another step closer. His boots graze the tips of yours and his chin is nearly tucked against his chest to look down at you properly. You’re breathing a little harder, anticipating another break of his patience and an onslaught of screaming all directed at your apparent mistakes made right in front of his face. Judgments you’d still be unable to solve no matter how much you thought about it or what you did to try and find a solution of healthy -or not- motives. Ghost doesn’t yell though. He actually lowers his face down to yours, eyes locked right on you and an intensity burning there.

“Why do you call me that?” His low growl made you shiver, especially when his hand dropped lower to your throat. Now squeezing, but holding your gaze steady on him, reminding you of his strength. The power over you he’d always held, and given you the instant to call him ‘sir’ in the first place. Everything about Ghost was overwhelming, and you’d always been one wave away from drowning under him.

“You deserve the honor…” You answer, certain. Even if he’d broken your spirit and came back in the aftermath with questions you still believed to be much too complex for a single-sentence answer. Hopefully, he understood a little bit better but the way you leaned against his hand, letting him actually feel the pressure of your throat pressing into his palm. Literally offering your trust in him over again, testing the Lieutenant and watching as his eyes widened. His other hand came up to your face, counteracting the pressure you’d applied to keep your breath and blood flow uninterrupted. His face is still only inches away from yours but unflinching at the close contact.

“Brass,” He murmured, masked face teasing closer with his own lack of control. “I’m not what you think I am.” Your chest tightens with his words, soaked in desperation that heats your lips and cheeks.

“What’s that, sir?” You question, earning another flinch of his fingers against your skin.

“Safe… Trustworthy… Honorable.” He replies, getting even closer. The smooth material ghosted over your lips, and his breathing fanning over you wetly through the damp material. You sigh, feeling lightheaded. Weak in his hands, confused yet happy to have your life held in the palms of his hands. Confused about where his mistrust comes from, but gaining perspective every time he flinches when you address him in the way you always believed he’d feel the most revered and… loved.

“You’re wrong,” You challenge, hands moving from your sides to run up the thin shirt covering his chest. “You’re a man of fear. One that death shakes at the mention of. Even looking at you through my scope a mile away is enough to remind me you’re capable of inhuman things…” Your voice lowers, hearing thoughts straight from your soul escaping without filter from your brain. “Yet you’re human. So much more than anyone sees. Because it’s not evil that keeps you going. It’s the fear and hatred of losing anything that means something to you.” Your hand rests over his chest, hearing his heart thundering against his ribs.

“You’re not a monster, you are terrified of losing everything. That is why I call you ‘sir’, is because you’re a man unlike any other, Ghost.”

Hearing your own voice say his name like that feels so foreign. Coming off your tongue with the letters not fitting together in a way that you’d experienced. But Ghost… he reacts differently. His hands tightened around you and he hugged you against his chest tightly. His chest heaves up and down and the thunder of his heartbeat impossibly quickens until your left ear can’t hear anything but the repetitive thrum of blood coursing through his body. Heavy arms snake around you, one around your head to secure it to him and the other clinging to your waist with his hand fisting into your shirt until it’s skin-tight on your stomach. The Lieutenant practically shakes against you, using your much smaller frame to steady himself.

Yet he’s dropping to one knee on the ground, bringing you down with him until he’s nearly cradling you and softly rocking your weight back and forth. Soothing himself in much the same way a child would after scraping their knee on the sidewalk and the tears have begun to dry up. God, it made the massive man feel so weak; much like you did after he’d yelled at you a week ago. Both of you kneeled on the floor now with all of your wounds opened up to each other and had silently found a calm within the eye of a destructive storm that had been raging against the pair of you while everyone on the outside had been simply looking on with bated breath to see how the ending would play out.

“Brass - I…” Ghost’s voice choked up again, his arms tightening around you. “God, I can’t do this anymore. I can’t ignore you anymore… I’m losing my mind.”

You lean into his chest harder, arms struggling to reach all the way around his wide back in an attempt to support him a little bit. You understood through the way he was grabbing at anything on you he could desperately. So you did all you could and rubbed your hand up and down his back quietly allowing him the time to work through his thoughts. Both of you had been hurt by this, and while the Lieutenant’s form of apology came in the way he’d ushered you for help when you needed it most and unquestionably been the reason behind the way your quarters looked. Now it was you, cradling a man who’d never shown a single crack in his armor, feeling the weight of so many emotional wounds that he was practically bleeding out with pain and palpable regret.

“You don’t have to…” You whisper, resting your forehead against his.

Ghost just nods his head, panting heavily and giving a low sort of whine. “I’m so sorry…”

You smile sadly. “I’m sorry too.”

His eyes soften more, blinking away at wetness brimming at his waterline. “Say it again… please. I need to hear it. God, please.”

“It’s okay…” Your hands cradle his cheeks, feeling the sharp lines and hard muscles. “I’m right here, Ghost. We’re going to do this over again… Together, Ghost.”

Nodding weakly, he meets your gaze as you say his name again. Reveling in it. “Together… together, with you.”

[sulumuns-dootah]

Taking the WHB demons (+ angels) to the Zoo

⟡ Masterlist ⟡ 

A/N: It's my b-day! And as a treat to myself I went to visit a local Zoo so ofc I'll write about how our demons (+ angels) would behave if they got to go too! ^^

Characters: All of the demons + the Seraphs

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With Satan in your group, you don't have to worry about being suffocated in a crowd of people. In a true Satan fashion, they all get a healthy dose of his boots to their behinds if they get even remotely close. And no, children are not safe from him.

Sitri is the snacks and drinks provider. No need to buy overpriced slushies and ice-cream when as soon as you get a craving, something sweet is being handed to you.

As unathletic as Leraye is, you'll see him speedwalking from an enclosure to enclosure. Oh, but if the Zoo has a tropical house with storm sounds for the immersive ambiance? Good luck getting him out of there.

Paimon takes photos of everything and anything. Every few enclosures has to take a break to pick out the best photos and delete the rest to clear out space for more.

Interestingly, Belial - or moreso Jjyu is really quiet. Maybe because someone told him that if he doesn't learn his manners, he might end up as food for one of the animals. This also might be the first time Belial has had such peace and quiet since he first got Jjyu.

Please, tell Astaroth to keep his snake at home in advance. The last thing anyone wants is to argue with the staff that it's really his snake and that he didn't steal it.

You barely notice Zagan even being there. Well, if he didn't leave his talismans everywhere, that is. Despite being practically expresionless, you can see him softly smile while watching animals do something cute.

Ppyong acts like a toddler. In the beginning he'll fly around all excited, happily exclaiming at the actions of the animals. Then he gets all tired and whiny, so Zagan someone has to carry him around. Once he's all rested up, it's back to square one

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"Oh, that's you favorite animal? M'kay, gimme a second to look up how much it costs." - Mammon

"Look at them, all they do is lay around and do nothing and we still have to pay to see them!" - Bimet

Eligos nearly buy out the plushies in the souvenir shop. Can't balme him, tho, they're usually super cute (and expensive x.x).

Do you feel guilty for dragging everyone around just to see your favorite animals? Valerfor is more than happy to be dragged around! Just give him enough time to read the info plaque so the two of you can have an interesting convo later.

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Oh boy is it hard to get Leviathan to come with you. And honestly, I wouldn't recommend at all. The people make him anxious and the fact that the animals get all of your attention instead of him? How he wishes he could hang them all.

Foras is probably the best Hades noble to visit with. He's eager to see all the animals the place has to offer. Also doesn't mind being dragged around.

Scheduling tip: make sure the day is overcast. If it's rainy, Barbatos will refuse to go anywhere. If it's sunny, there's no way you can keep his clothes on and with all the kids around... yikes.

Glasyalabolas will hang around the predators and vultures. If he's not there, he's probably about, scaring unattended children.

A Zoo is an amazing place to release Orias back into the wilderness. Just let him loose to disappear amongst all the other children at the playground. There's a chance that some unfortunate parent will mistake him for their own kid and take him home.

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Beelzebub is excited to try out all the food at the food court/restaurant within the Zoo. If there's a queue, he'll just walk up to the front. In such case is handy to have Satan with you to kick everyone out of the way.

Our poor Bael tries to coordinate the whole trip with you. The whole time he's holding an itinerary with time spans that you can spend on certain sections so you can catch as much commented feedings as possible.

Stolas has you to stop at every stall with snacks. So what, Sitri has a whole bag of them? Those he can have anytime, but these are only available at the Zoo (they're not)

The only one who's allowed to tour the Zoo on his own, separate from the group is Naberius, because nobody's willing to stop at every enclosure so he can read the plaques and commit them to memory. The only ones he avoids are canines bc they count as his family or smth and he hates to see them caged.

Oh lord the amount of times you've accidentally left Amon behind because he fell asleep while sitting somewhere in shade on a bench. Only once Beel returns from his food tasting will Amon stick with the group, so he can spend time by his side.

   ༺☆༻

Similar to Glasyalabolas, Ronove likes to hang around vultures and animals known to scare people. If there's a night exhibition, he'd also enjoy that. Partially because when people get startled when they enter a room and see him just silently standing there.

Phenix is kinda a hard one. Obviously, in their state it's difficult to go out anywhere in the human world. They agree, so they're content wiht just seeing Paimon's photos.

Another demon, who better be left at home is Dantalian. Sure, he can pass as a human, but you'd have to have him on a leash or keep an eye on him constantly. The moment he's out of your sight, he'll just try to get into an enclosure of some dangerous animal.

   ༺☆༻

Taking out Belphegor could be actually funny. Get him a wheelchair and take turns witht he rest of your group pushing him around. Just make sure to not leave him anywhere, just like Amon.

Beleth loves the house of felines. He's the exact opposite of Naberius. He's aware how endangered some large cat breeds are and he's happy to see some of his nearly extinct relatives safely protected.

Our floor gremlin Gusion has the answer to every question you might have about an animal. How? He's literally looking at the plaque rn. (*tired side-eye*)

A trip? Bathin very much cuncurs. Actually, why even go to a local Zoo when you can go to the one at the other side of the country? But don't get surprised if he gets a bit too excited iykwim.

Andrealphus spends most of the time in an area dedicated to bees and showcasing beekeeping. (my zoo has it and it's super adorable) Most of the animal enclosures have a stench to them and the pollinating flowers are so soothing to him. Also there's something about the constant buzzing that helps calm his mind.

As long as Belphegor doesn't go, Agares is happy to join you. He's taken over his country and now he would like to take over your attention? Not happening. It's either him or Belphie.

And as a loyal servant, Vassago refuses to go anywhere if his king is not going either. If you end up going with these two, however, I would avoid commented feeding since they could technicaly count as a speech.

   ༺☆༻

Being there since the begining, Lucifer's seen all the animals on earth as they were made by God, so he doesn't really see a reason to go to a Zoo, but eventually agrees to go when the others keep talking about it.

Morax is the best demon to take with you. All animals tend to naturally flock to him and so whenever you approach an enclosure, the animal will walk as close to him as it can, giving you the best view and if it's safe to, you can even pet it.

Big cat lover no.2 AKA Marbas! Will wait unti it's the cats' feeding time and then just watch as they tear their meal apart (it's usually a whole dead rabbit from what I've seen).

Buer would much more preffer a quiet getaway to maybe do some yoga or meditation, but nobody really asks him. As long as it makes you happy, he's happy to tag along. You'll probably find him later on with Adrealphus in the bee field.

Ooh, Gamigin loves snakes! They remind him of dragons (notice how he doesn't think they're related). "Wow, look at that one! I was that size when I was about 1000 years old!"

   ༺☆༻

Gabriel will most definitely decline your invitation to come along from the get go, so here's what you do: instead of a trip to a Zoo, you tell him that you're going a place where humans celebrate all the different types of God's creations. If he actually endures the whole schebang is a whole different question, though.

Been there, seen the animals before. Michael isn't interested in going anywhere where humans congregate. Though, it would make wiping them out easier.

Raphael is actually happy to go along with you. The whole experience is like reading a book witht he author's commentary. "Oh, that one was my idea. Can you tell?", "Yeah, I was telling Michael that it was a bad idea, but he wouldn't listen.", "Ahah, that one is scary to you? Gabriel made that one!"

[theobsessedcookiefan]

Oh oh I have a good one what if y/n cookies was lover of the five beast and they see them get corrupted as how is they reaction seeing them crying broken heart saying please please please PLEASE give him/her back give me back my beloved cookie of volition/ knowledge/change/ happiness/ solidarity I want them back to me I’m will do anything just please turn back to normal

NOOO.. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... Alr, I'll do it bc I like to torture myself and y'all need to suffer with me 😠😠😠

I'm going to make different names for the pre-corrupted beasts!! Bc I seriously doubt they were named that way before 😓😓

I read somewhere that Burning Spice was called Warming Spice before?? I'm not sure tho- but I'll use that name!! I'll try to be original in the names but if it gets too close to other names that other people give them then I'm so sorry bc I probably saw it and don't remember 😓😓😓

Ohboyitendeduplongerthanexpected

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

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Life is a bitch sometimes, it can give you everything you ever desired and take it back in an instant, were you too egotistical? Did you broke the universe balance by being too happy? Maybe it wasn't fair, you lived happily with the best Cookies you've ever met, compassionate, heroic and righteous, the whole package if you could say so, and they loved you oh so much, so much that they would sacrifice everything for your well-being and happiness, to protect your smile; the prettiest smile they've ever seen.

You remember when it started, the first warning came that damned week, you, Blueberry Milk and Saccharine Sugar were helping the locals to make a new orphanage, having a gift exchange game for the kids, at one moment the adults had to bring the food from the first location and left the kids with both of you, they were quite the handful if you were being honest but what could you expect from little cookies? You decided that maybe a little game would calm them down, but you were so busy, not noticing that your partners were getting stressed, when you came back with everything to play you saw half the kids laying down in the ground, obviously you panicked, trying to see if they were breathing or not but thank the divines they were only asleep. When you found the other you saw quite the scene, Saccharine Sugar was playing a melody with her harp and Blueberry Milk was helping the kids to lay down more comfortable in the floor, once he saw you she shook her a bit, she blinked and the music stopped, making the kids wake up, it wasn't that bad but you still told them not to do that again. If only you could've been there when they got the idea..

The second warning came at a perfect afternoon in White Flour's temple, it had been a busy day for her, many cookies came searching for her to make their wishes reality, she seemed extremely tired after all that work so you offered your lap for her to rest her head on, she ended up telling you about how greed changed some of them, how many of them wanted money and gems, it was disappointing really. If only you reassured her that that money could be used for helping people..

The third sign was the fights between Sea Salt and Warming Spice, those two had always been close and used to spar to improve their fighting skills so you were used to it, but that day it ended up with both of them badly injured, you remember running to stop the reddish cookie from using the sharp end of the blade, your worried expression and tone of voice seemed to snap them both of some kind of trance and so you told them to go directly to the healer of the village. If only you were there with them when they fought again..

Then it all faded to chaos, maybe they realized they held all that power or grew bored of the routine? Either way you remember standing in front of a destroyed village, cookie's screams sounding everywhere, it was such a horrible vision, you couldn't even start to comprehend what happened, that was until you heard that melodic voice, it was Saccharine Sugar! Was she hurt too? The virtues were the heroes of the village, they obviously fought against whatever destroyed right? Right..?. Without other thought in mind you ran to where her voice could be heard and what you saw was horrifying, her wings were creating big gusts of wind that were destroying the houses around and she was laughing at it.. She was actually enjoying it. It couldn't be! She was the most gentle of the five, she couldn't find pleasure in hurting others could she? No, not your Saccharine Sugar, not her. You ran towards her extending your hand to try and reach her, she didn't expect you to appear so the wind stopped and you were able to hug her, thing that surprised her.

━━━━━━ ◦ ❖ ◦ ━━━━━━

"Please.. Please stop, we can find a solution for this, just stop, we can rebuild the village, I know they'll forgive you, just stop please."

It was a desperate plea more than anything else, but she didn't respond, her face expressionless and soon everything faded to black for you.

When you woke up you didn't recognize the place you were in, that was until you looked up, it was night time already? You could've sworn it was afternoon before.. Before.. Oh no, without thinking it twice you got up as quickly as you could, starting to run, trying to see if you could identify the place you were in, you ran for a while until you found one of the villagers hiding behind a barn, a barn? Oh! You were on that area, you got closer to the Cookie hiding and they told you how the virtues started to destroy everything they saw, how many of the villagers didn't survive the chaos and how the remaining were trying to escape but every entrance to the village was guarded by one of them, that was good, at least you knew where your partners were now, you thanked the villager, telling them to hide inside the barn instead and that you would stop the virtues. Oh how wrong you were.

You found them? Yes of course you did, they were guarding the entrances like that villager said, but they were different, not only their appearance but their personality, you remember trying to get to each one of them, pleading for them to stop this madness;

"Please, don't you see you're hurting others? You're supposed to protect them! We can still fix this!"

"If you continue with this you'll only get far away from yourself, please come back, I'll talk to everyone and try to make them understand what happened!"

"I know you care about them, you're not as apathetic as you act, I promise we can solve this together! Just please.."

"Come on.. This is just cruel and you know it! Your plays are supposed to bring others joy, not pain!"

It didn't work, at the end they just looked at you as if they didn't had any idea what you were talking about, as if this was what they were meant to do. Maybe they couldn't be saved? Maybe they were supposed to end like this? Probably, maybe this was what the witches wanted all along..

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[on-a-lucky-tide]

Curious what you'd say about Soap for the character ask game. You haven't really spoken about him as much as the others so I'm curious :O (id love to hear about every single character tho i wont lie to you but i have a feeling you'll get asked about those lol)

@nekrosmos asked for Soap too.

Honestly? There is unfortunately a reason. I lingered around fandom for a good few months before I got involved at all. I saw some behaviour from his fanbase that I didn't like and so I made the conscious choice that he's not a character I'd probably be creating much for. I love the art, happy to support creators, etc. Besides, there are so many delicious, delicious rarepairs to love and create for and plenty of gallant, productive, devoted Ghoapers.

He's quite compelling though, and I've got quite a few thoughts and headcanons, and I'm happy to write prompts with him. A few friends on Discord really love him and I like to create for them too, cause happy friends give me the fuzzies. So, you know, a story idea might grip me by the balls and I'll wack out a long form thing.

favorite thing about them

His journals.

Reading those finally gave me a connection with his character that I hadn't developed previously. But they really show how driven he is, how much he wants to be the best he can be, so he's not a burden, so he doesn't let anyone down. He's constantly striving to earn his place to the point that it kills him in the end.

I think he genuinely struggles with wanting to be liked (as part of 'earning his place'), and I think he is often too much for people. Ghost giving back as good as he gets is a comfortable relationship because the line for Ghost is way, way in the distance; Johnny doesn't have to worry like he does with 'normal' people. Neither of them is fuckin' normal.

Price giving him a chance would have been the first step towards the hero-style worship he has for him. "What? Me? Ye want... me? Aye, aye I will be the best fuckin' dog ye ever had, I will bite my own leg off for ye." Everything Soap does is to prove that Price didn't make a mistake. That he was a good investment. And Price, the sly fucker, knows it. He sees himself there.

least favorite thing about them

I wish they had given him a stronger accent and leaned more into that in the games. In fact, I wish that for all of them.

I also think that Soap has capacity to cause great harm without even realising it. Like, we get glimpses of it; he's nearly court-martialled for punching out a copper. In his single-minded pursuit of something, I reckon there could be a lot of collateral damage.

He lacks confidence but will cover it up by being an arsehole and doing arsehole things (such as smuggling a girl on base to impress The Guys). I say I like "least favourite"; I think this makes him compelling as a character. He's not all sunshine and rainbows. He's just as gritty, professional and flawed as the rest of 'em.

favorite line

"You sick bastard..."

"My kingdom for a suppressor..."

"Price?... This belongs to you, sir."

brOTP

Gaz & Soap

OTP

Uh... none really. Ghost/Soap?

nOTP

Don't have any strong feelings on any.

random headcanon

He's really bad at team sport. He showed no interest in any when he was growing up. Gym? Running? Swimming? Anything where the only competition is himself and his own limits? That's where Soap's head is.

unpopular opinion

Honestly? I don't know which of my opinions would be unpopular. Probably the 'not sunshine and rainbows' one, maybe?

song i associate with them

favorite picture of them

[wheeboo]

seventeen as wave to earth songs

FEATURING. seventeen (ot13) GENRE. headcanons WARNINGS. none WORD COUNT. 1.3k

notes: i thought n wrote this within the hours of 3-4 am because my brain couldn’t fight the urge even tho no one asked for this lmao ;; im blaming this seungkwan edit on tiktok that conspired me to do this. a lot of ppl have prob done this but this is my take (some of them were HARD) :') honestly any of these can be switched around

choi seungcheol as calla

the first word i associated with this song is "devotion", and my mind immediately thought of cheol. he is the definition of loyalty and puts in his all when it comes to love and towards whoever his calla will be. he has the power of reassurance and hope, and this can also be interpreted vice versa will cheol being the "calla" of the relationship--the one who may be withering away inside, so he needs that other half to supply him with the rain that he needs to grow

"But Calla, you can always grow back, oh If you don't have enough sunlight I'll blow the clouds away, Calla Bloom yourself until the end"

yoon jeonghan as daisy.

jeonghan as daisy just MAKES SENSE?? he is the splash of colour within a simplistic life, a constant source of happiness even in the most mundane situations. i just love the vibrant feels of this song and it makes me imagine a scenario of running down the beach holding hands with him. seeing his presence just never fails to brighten up my day up, and its just a very comforting song in general which reminds me sm of him

"Oh, daisy, it's my happiness to run into you Life always goes on and on But, I'll live with you forever So, be my daisy"

joshua hong as bad

the instrumentals of the song gives me joshua vibes. and just like the lyrics, how can the sight of joshua's smile/just him in general not make your day even better? for some reason i also had an imagination of him serenading someone with this song plsss, it would be so swoonworthy to hear that. its such a romantic song abt finding joy and happiness in your loved one, and i think joshua has a lot of love inside of him

"How could my day be bad when I'm with you? You're the only one who makes me laugh So how can my day be bad? It's a day for you"

wen junhui as light

the constant mention of the moon and the sky just gives me jun energy. i don't know if the word quirky is the right word to call this song (probably not, now that i think abt it, maybe more calm) but its a word i would definitely describe jun with. he's always a person who tries his best to shine as much as he could and he's just someone you can rely on yk

"You are my sea, you are my sunshine The star, the moon"

kwon soonyoung as pink

this song is just very... freeing and nostalgic? and it reminds of me soonyoung where everything just feel so liberating and free when it comes to being with him. his spirit just seems to rid of any worries just so easily, and it kind of reminds me of the sunset, where the colour pink is shown, and just like the song says- it's such a beautiful colour just like him

"During the sunset The pink light is clear It drew you, the beautiful you Your image" (translation may not be accurate because it's in full korean)

jeon wonwoo as seasons

someone had to be seasons and it was such a hard choice of who to give this song to but ultimately, i picked wonwoo. this song is just so bittersweet and melancholic. it holds so many heartfelt emotions inside of it but also so many unhappy emotions as well. it displays vulnerability and how that kind of feeling can feel burdensome to those around you and overall, i feel like he is the more perfect choice for this song tbh

"Oh my life is fallin' apart Maybe no one will notice if I disappear But I'll pray for you all the time If I could be by your side I'll give you all my life, my seasons"

lee jihoon as wave

i absolutely adore the instrumentals of this song sm. it's about embracing the unknown with someone special and i feel like the kinda fits with jihoon very well. i just love the symbolism of waves and stars in the song and how it symbolises this desire to adventure and traverse thru the unknown. i also think jihoon is very introspective n knowing that nothing lasts forever, but with the wave being mentioned that will last forever just,, perfectly contrasts with that? this was a bit hard to explain asljkdlas n made more sense in my head

"When you spoke to me, The words are like a floating star Now I'm next to you The waves will take us far away"

xu minghao as ride

the lyrics of the song is basically describing someone else being your safe space, and i definitely think minghao is that. he is the type of person whose presence is an easy source of comfort to whatever sort of emotional baggage one may hold. he's simply just the definition of the word comfort and to me, is what this song gives

"I'm on a ride Ride You are my city Everything"

kim mingyu as peach eyes

mingyu is just the type of person whose eyes seem to hold SO MUCH love or appear so lovestruck? or just him in general tbh--he just seems to hold so much love and is willing to dump that all for the person he adores w all his life. like eyes can carry so much within them istg. this song is also more on the cheery and upbeat side and i definitely think that resonates w the type of person that he is

"Peach eyes and blue skies It's on the moonlight, how many songs I write You'll be my sunlight, how could I not rely On you, peach eyes?"

lee seokmin as sunny days

the sun = seokmin hello?? i love the description of nature in this song and it reminds me of walking in the park on a sunny afternoon with him and it's just so perfect, like how everything is just so insignificant without the presence of the other person aka him. it's a golden type of love where it doesn't waver even as time goes by, and i can definitely see that with seokmin

"You are my golden age Evеrything shines so bright That my eyes go blind Our youth never ages here"

boo seungkwan as love.

this is my favourite wave to earth song btw. it may just be me being very biased but listening to the song while thinking of him just FITS him? the song is literally abt the strength of love thru hardships, being someone with a fragile heart, and reminds me of those types of hugs where it just feels... right? like everything is simply okay? the song makes me ascend each time i listen to it on full blast, and boo never fails to make me ascend with not just his voice, but his care and the amount of love he carries in himself, his strength, just HIM

"My little heart too Like small waves in it Broken and pushed back Melting into you Only then can I see my eternity" (translation may not be accurate because it's in full korean)

vernon chwe as so real

the instrumentals in this song esp at the end are so superior btw. other than that, despite the calm vibes this song emits just like vernon, it's also a song about feeling stuck, about being lost in your emotions. not that i'm assuming vernon is feeling this way, but in general, it reminds me of that feeling being alone in your own world which i think suits him with this song more than others

"I can't explain Where I'm buried now An empty vein You'll never understand"

lee chan as surf.

this song has such an uplifting and upbeat vibe and it's about enjoying the time that you have, even though it's temporary, and living in the moment spending time with yourself and also those that you love as well. the lyrics make me smile so much, and i definitely think chan fits the song very well because i def think he has this power to charge others (like his members) with energy just by being himself

"Dance my babe, dance my friends We don't have much time to enjoy Just sing it my babe Bigger than you ever did We don't have much time to enjoy Our time will be gone someday But I'm okay Life is like surfin' anyway"

taglist (open) ʚɞ @enhazen @haowrld @ylliris-hanniehae @icyminghao @slytherinshua @jeonride @lockburn-castle @vrnism @weird-bookworm @mhlsymlysn @ryuwonieebae

[childrenofcain-if]

Loving this work but just worried I'm not/ won't be smart enough to fully understand, get, or relate to the mc/ros (I know I'm not as smart as them, but I'm more worried just about being smart enough, bc they're really smart.)

Eh, I'll get over it. The very introduction outside of the letter was amazing to, of the poor staff being that afraid of it all. I don't want to insinuate that Elias is an unreasonable man...well actually that's what I'm doing. Firing an employee just because they may have inconvenienced mc is wild. This isn't criticism of the writing, just noticing a character flaw and my heart goes out to them. And the letter from Persephone was amazing, I very much loved all the little tiny pieces it gives us. Fitting it into the lore has been great, and I'm sure as the other nonnies have pointed out, Persephone may be mc's mom, and Hades is probably just Elias.

It was entertaining seeing mc fret over the application. I know your Yale is different from this worlds Yale and is about academic merit, but goddamn, I'm sure less qualified students got in.

The customization was absolutely insane and fun to go through. Just sat there for several minutes clicking on and off options and envisioning it.

Genuinely can't wait for more, and can't wait to simp.

thank you, dear bonnie 😌 i was waiting for people to kind of realise that firing an employee for slightly disturbing your child’s peace, or even the being in the realm of possibility to do so, is unhinged 💀 but hey, we’re all clapping and cheering atp cause dear father can do no wrong.

i got so many people telling me about persephone (proserpine) and hades (pluto), being MC’s parents but... are they? because how would that work 🧐

as for this universe’s yale, the only way someone academically average got in would be through a sports scholarship. yale is not playing when it comes to only bringing in the students they see a huge potential in. this works since no yale alumni has ended up working a less than stellar job and companies are notorious for immediately preferring their graduates than any other ivy league, aside from harvard.

don’t worry about not understanding it as i’ll be very happy to explain the points that you can’t grasp. i didn’t want to spoonfeed my audience all the things cause y’all are smarter than anyone can give you credit for. but if you don’t get it, it’ll also be partially my fault for making it too complicated. i have concepts that i don’t understand either and half the time i’m researching for M’s dialogues, i have no clue what they’re talking about in my head.

point is that you don’t need to feel stupid or ashamed for these things, nor should anyone make you feel bad about it.

i hope chapter two and three will be up to your standards! there probably would be more answers than questions when it comes to MC’s family tho 💀

[canirove]

In The Name of Love | Chapter 32

Auhor's note: Two things. 1: Only three chapters (two + epilogue) left! 😱 And 2... I'm sorry 🫣

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"I don't know who has eaten more candy, me or the kids" Emma says.

"I think it's a draw" I chuckle.

"You could have also eaten some, you know? Some sugar will do you good, cheer you up."

"I'm fine, Emma."

"No, you aren't. You don't need any make up to look dead, you've been leaving in a constant Halloween for the past weeks."

"Wow, thank you" I laugh.

"Val, I'm sorry if it sounds mean, but I'm worried about you. Are you sure you are ok?"

"I'm fine" I repeat. But I'm not. 

Since the game against Manchester United, things haven't improved. At the stadium no one has bothered me again, probably because Dani did talk with someone. And at the school people don't gossip about me anymore. But online…

Online the mole has kept sharing photos and things about me, the haters loving it, their mean comments getting worse and worse. And nothing seems to be stopping them, not even Pedri giving an interview and calling them out for their behaviour. 

"You are such a bad liar, Val…" Emma says. "And that's why you are having lunch with me and my family today."

"What?"

"Yep. You need to have a proper meal, and if there is someone who can give you that, that's my mum. So c'mon" she says, linking her arm with mine and starting to walk.

"Emma, I don't want to bother your family."

"You won't be bothering anyone. They haven't seen you in ages, they are looking forward to it."

"Shouldn't we get rid of this make up, first? I don't know how they will feel if we show up looking like skeletons."

"Stop inventing excuses and let's go" she says, dragging me outside the school.

"Bye, Miss Valeria! Happy Halloween!"

"Happy Halloween" I smile to some of the kids waiting for their parents. And when we cross the main gate…

"Cougar bitch!" someone yells.

"What the… Val!" Emma says. "Oh my God, Val. Are you ok?"

"I… I…" I mumble. I'm covered on something sticky. Something sticky that stinks and…

"Val, hey. Val!"

"I… I…"

"What the fuck are you doing, people?" I hear Emma say. "Stop taking photos! Show some respect!"

"Emma…" I whisper.

"It's ok, come" she says, putting an arm around my shoulders and making me walk.

"Girls! What happened?" Luis says, running towards us.

"Some teenagers threw eggs and god knows what else at Val when we were leaving."

"What?" 

"Emma… Emma, I don't feel ok" I manage to say.

"Don't worry, Val. You are safe now" Luis says, helping me walk. "We'll go inside and help you get cleaned."

"I… I can't… I can't breathe."

"Val… Val, hey… Val!" Emma says, her voice being the last thing I hear before everything turns black. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Hello, beautiful."

"Pedri?" I say, slowly opening my eyes. "What… Where am I?"

"The hospital."

"What?"

"Woah, careful" he says when I try to get up from the bed. "You can't do that."

"Why? What… what happened?" I ask, my eyes still trying to adjust to how bright the light in the room is.

"You fainted at the school. Don't you remember?"

"I… I think…" The teenagers. Whatever they threw at me. Luis and Emma. "Fuck."

"I'll take that as you remembering" he chuckles. 

"How did I end here, tho?"

"After you fainted you weren't waking up, Emma got scared and called an ambulance. They ran some tests and turns out that everything in you is low. Your iron levels, the vitamins, other things I have no idea what they are… They were lucky they caught you when they did, you know? This could have been serious."

"I… I…" 

"You haven't been taken care of yourself, Val. And I…" Pedri says, running his hands through his hair. "I knew there was something going on. I could see it. But I'm stupid and…"

"Pedri, hey. Hey" I say, taking one of his hands on mine. "It isn't your fault."

"Isn't it?" he laughs. Though it is a sad laugh, one that makes my heart sink. "I knew you were struggling and I did nothing to stop it. To help you."

"Because I didn't let you. You, or Emma, or Silvia. You know how stubborn I am, it is all my fault."

"No, Val. This is…"

"Valeria!" my mother says, storming into the room. "Oh, Valeria, my poor child."

"Mum?"

"How are you, Val? When they told me they had taken you to the hospital I feared the worst."

"I… I'm fine" I say, trying to process this outburst of motherly love. "I just haven't been eating well and resting and…"

"And it is all his fault!" she says, looking at Pedri.

"Mum…"

"It is! He is the one to blame, the one who has pushed you to this, to almost dying!"

"Mum, that's not true."

"Have you seen yourself, Val? You are too thin, and the bags under your eyes reach the floor. And do you know why? Because of him. It is all because of him!" she says, pointing at Pedri. "Love should not have you looking like this!"

"She's right, Val" he says, his eyes focused on his hands.

"Of course I am!" my mum says, raising her voice more and more. "Get out of here!"

"What? No!" I complian.

"Get out of here, Pedro! I don't want to see you near my daughter ever again!"

"Mum, stop!"

"I said get out!"

"I… I'm sorry" he says, getting up from his chair and starting to walk away.

"No! Pedri, don't go!"

"Out!" my mum roars again.

"No! Pedri!" I say, trying to get up from the bed but only managing to get tangled with the sheets.

"He has to go, Val. This is all his fault."

"No! No, no, no. Pedri!" I yell, trying to free myself from my mum's grip.

"Is everything ok?" a nurse says, walking into the room. "Why is she screaming?"

"She needs to calm down. Can you give her something?"

"I don't want to calm down, mum! I want him! Pedri!" I yell again.

"I'm gonna call a doctor" the nurse says before leaving.

"I want him, mum" I cry. "I love him."

"I know you do, Val" she says while hugging me. "I know you do. But this is for the best, I promise you."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Val" Silvia says after knocking on my room's door. "He's here. Do I ask him to come in?"

"Yes, please" I reply, quickly opening my phone's camera to check myself. I've been resting in bed since I came back from the hospital, and I definitely look like shit.

"You look beautiful, Val."

"Bloody hell, Pedri" I say, my phone slipping from my hands and hitting the floor. When I look up he is leaning against the door's frame as he always does, that smirk I love so much in his face. "Do you do it on purpose?"

"Do what? Scare you?"

"No. That" I say, gesturing towards him. "Do you stand like that because you know I love it?" 

"I didn't know you loved it" he shrugs.

"Yeah, sure."

"I'm serious" he says, walking towards me and picking up my phone.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome" he smiles, sitting on my bed. Though that smile isn't one I love. It is a sad one. "How are you?"

"Good. But I've missed you" I say, reaching for his hand.

"Val…" Pedri says, avoiding my touch. "We need to talk."

"About what?"

"You know about what."

"No, I don't."

"Val…" he sighs. "We need to talk about what happened at the school. About you ending at the hospital, about what your mum said."

"My mum just said nonsense" I say, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Did she? Because I think she was right."

"What?" I laugh.

"Love should not make you feel like this. Anxious, scared, angry, sad… It should not make you feel so on edge that you end up at the hospital." 

"I'm not feeling like that."

"C'mon, Val. Can't you see it? Being with me is hurting you. And I… I can't keep seeing you suffer like this because of me. I… we… we should…"

"We should what? Break up?" 

"I'm sorry, Val. But it is for the best."

"The best?" I cry. "How is breaking up for the best? I love you!"

"And I love you too."

"Then why are you breaking up with me?"

"Because we are hurting each other, Val" he says, raising his voice. "Because I keep hurting you!"

"You aren't hurting me, Pedri. People are!"

"But they are hurting you because of me, because you are with me. It's the same!"

"It's… urgh!" I yell, throwing one of my pillows against the wall. The pillow with his photo on it to be precise.

"I'm sorry, Val, but your mum was right. It's best if I stay away."

"My mum knows nothing, Pedri. Nothing! She just said that because she's never liked you for whatever the reason!"

"It isn't for whatever the reason. She's never liked me because she was able to see that us being together was bound to end up with me hurting you."

"What?" I laugh and cry all at the same time.

"Goodbye, Val."

"What? No! Pedri, where are you going?" I say, getting up from my bed at the same time he does, having to hold to him to not fall.

"Look at you, Val. Look at you. This is all my fault" he says while hugging me. 

"It's not your fault. It isn't" I insist, my body trembling between his arms. "It's them, not you."

"I'm sorry, Val."

"No" I cry when he takes a step away. "Pedri, please, no."

"I love you, Val. I will always love you" he whispers, kissing my forehead and leaving the room.

"Pedri. Pedri, please… Pedri!" I yell. But he doesn't come back. He isn't coming back.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Beth, Luis. What are you doing here?" I say when I open the door of my apartment.

"We've come to check on you" she smiles.

"And to bring you this" he says, giving me a bouquet of flowers. 

"Oh, that's so kind of you" I reply while trying really hard not to cry, the memories of all the bouquets Pedri got me over the years coming back. "Please come in."

"Thank you" they say.

"So, how are you?" Beth says, taking my hand on hers.

"Been better, not gonna lie" I chuckle. "But my doctor said that physically I'm almost recovered."

"Good, that's good. Because we have something that may help you with everything else" Beth says.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"We all know break ups aren't easy. Especially when two people love each other as much as you and Pe… him love each other. But there is something that I know always helps, and that's keeping yourself busy with something."

"I don't think I'm ready to go back to the school just yet…"

"We were thinking about something like that but different" Luis says, showing me a piece of paper he had in his pocket. "Have you ever heard about this program? It's like an Erasmus but for teachers."

"An Erasmus?" I ask.

"Yeah. Instead of spending a year abroad studying, you do it teaching." 

"We have a few friends who have tried it and they all have loved it. The other day we had dinner with some of them and they mentioned that there were some free spots that start in January and last just six months instead of the whole year" Beth explains. 

"And we thought that a change of scenery would do you good" Luis continues. "New country, new kids and parents, new language, culture, people…"

"Though not really” Beth says. “Because one of the free spots is in Manchester, and you have a friend there, don't you?"

"I do, yes. Ferran."

"Are things ok between you two?" she asks.

"They are, yes. He's been checking up on me daily since I was in the hospital" I say.

"Well, now he could do it in person and maybe help you with everything else so you don't feel so alone." 

"And who knows, he may even help you fix things with your boy and get back together."

"Luis!" Beth scolds him.

"What? You said it yourself!"

"I didn't, Val. I just… I…"

"It's ok" I smile. "And you are right. If there is someone who can help, that's Ferran."

"Then will you think about our offer?"

"I will, Beth. Thank you very much."

"Anything for you, Val" she says before hugging me. "Anything for you."

[angelofverdum]

Station 19 S07e10

19!

I'm overwhelmed by feelings. It's amazing how much fictional characters can make you feel.

My hope and wish for the end of these characters was for them to have a resolution and be happy.

Honestly, I can't complain. Maybe I should wait for the excitement to die to write anything about it.

But I love the ending for every character. I loved how they incorporated these "dreams" into the action scenes.

Andy as Chief is a great resolution for her. Jack being her true love was not something I was expecting. I feel it was something they pulled out at the last minute, and don't get me wrong I'm not opposed to it, Andy and Jack could have worked if they had more seasons and Grey wouldn't have left.

Ross. I'd hoped Natasha had something more in mind than marrying Bob but she is always being "My man My man My man" so it's fitting

Robert. One thing I loved about these flashforwards was that they were connected. Sully dreamed of that because in Ross's dream, they were already married, so he got to be with her.

Travis's most important relationship is with Vic. If I had Vic as a friend, I'd be like that too. Uprooting your life like that to move with your best friend is really brave.

Warren is probably my least favorite character but that's because he is boring but he is a good man. I was emotional watching his kids all grow.

Beckett is so unserious because why is he dreaming of Ross' sister.

Vic. She made me cried because she deserves everything that it's good in life. I'm so so so happy she didn't end up with Theo. She is helping people and living her best life. My beautiful queen.

Carina's dream is so important bc she had no one, her brother and mom died, and her father is trash. She was alone and then met this stubborn firefighter and said I want a big family with her, and that's what she did. Bring her back to Grey's you cowards.

Maya. My sweet beautiful, reckless, bisexual, hot, brave, selfless, stubborn, broken Maya. Her future was so bright without clouds. She falls asleep thinking about her wife and three kids. Maya who made me come back for season 2, and here I am seven seasons later, just a mess of emotion.

When I saw Carina enter that bar, it took me a whole ass minute to realize what they were trying to do. Why Carina was there. I'll never forget that excitement and I'll always be thankful for pairing them.

It's so weird to see that kind of representation. We didn't need coming out stories or the usual homophobia. Also, they were proud bisexuals and I'm always thankful that Maya said that with her whole chest. That was so important.

Now, my random thoughts about the episode.

I love the scene with the aluminum thing. That was cool and terrifying.

I loved it when Andy showed up. I was crying like she rescued me.

Danielle is so bad at screaming, her voice cracked up so much.

I loved Maya worried about Andy

I loved Carina suiting up finally. It was so funny.

I loved that we got to see adult Prue, and my god the legacy she is carrying.

I loved to see Andy as chief and Maya as captain.

I loved Carina doing what she preaches. Like Maya my god make yourself useful and give that woman an orgasm.

I'm not a fan of the Deluca-Bishop name tag because I just don't like hyphenating last names in general but I think it is cute they did that little detail for the fans who have really been asking for it.

Now for the last scene, keep in mind, that I've been crying the whole episode. Then this hit

I just laughed out loud. Omg, those are some terrible wigs. What was the point? What were they trying to achieve? To make them look older?

You should have put some gray hair and move it along. Like why they were having a bob off. Why would you do that to them?

Let me clean my eyes with Maya's real bob and the hottest she looked in the show.

Anyway, I'm always thankful when I get to experience a TV show so deeply. Even tho the cancellation is unfair. At least we got a proper ending.

I'm also glad that we got actors who cared deeply about their characters and respected them so much.

I'm a mess but 19 forever.

[pardonmydelays]

clancy tour (watching a livestream) essay 🙏

anon, this question made me so unbelievably happy omg. i just can't get around to the eras tour essay, however, i do feel the need to write, so we're doing this instead.

for the context: i woke up at 5:30 today to watch the livestream of clancy LA show. no, i wasn't there in person. but mentally i was.

please, listen to this incredible playlist while you read my essay (no one's gonna read, it mark my words):

i have decided we will just go through the entire setlist. i don't want to make this too long but i wanna talk about EVERY. SINGLE. SONG. let's fucking go.

OVERCOMPENSATE

so this is when i started crying. who the fuck cries on overcompensate, you would ask... well, me, apparently. i honestly think this is the best opener for both, an album and a show. this song gives me so much serotonin i can't even explain it. i'm always worried about tyler tho because his entrance looks dangerous (the jump, the jump, I AM TALKING ABOUT THE JUMP!). nothing bad happened tho, thankfully. i also noticed he was wearing the other version of clancy jacket today, the one with the hood. not that it's important, but it kinda is. for me at least.

HOLDING ON TO YOU

ok, so if you know me you probably know this is my ultimate favourite twenty one pilots song. and the live performance is even better with the crowd stand at the beginning (i swear to god, it's so incredible to me how much trust tyler has for the clique), clancy mask and lightbulb mic (you can tell tyler has a lot of fun with it), and my favourite part - josh's piano backflip during the bridge of the song. fucking iconic. what's not to love.

VIGNETTE

first thing i want to talk about is the insane transition from holding on to you to vignette. honestly, all transitions are so fucking amazing on clancy tour, it's impressive. now, tyler's little dance during this song is one of the most adorable things i've ever seen (he is such a cat omg) and and and! NEIL BANGING OUT THE TUNES!!! i'll be honest with you, because of this part vignette became one of my favourite songs from clancy and definitely one of my faves from this tour.

CAR RADIO

another one of my favourites. car radio will always hold a very special place in my heart, it's so relatable to me. it makes me so happy that we have a chance to see it being performed in clancy costume (and clancy mask!!!). and when tyler teleports at the end! (also i think he's wearing a totally different jacket in this clip which probably means he has three different clancy jackets, i have no proof tho so i'm just gonna shut up. the video is from LA night one tho. not my show). here's another clip, you can see how he teleported here.

THE JUDGE

ok, so for those who don't know, right before every show the fans in their incredible outfits are being filmed while singing the judge together and every night they show a different video of them singing first verse + chorus and then after that tyler comes out with his ukulele to finish the song. it makes me cry for no reason at all. yes, i cried today too (it just makes me so happy to see all the clikkies singing together and they all look so beautiful always). so what happened today? content warning glitch happened during fan video, you can watch it here, then blurryface tweeted this:

i am losing my goddamn mind over this, people on the livestream were losing their shit when this happened, I STARTED CRYING LIKE A GODDAMN FOOL BECAUSE I'M SO FUCKING EMOTIONAL ABOUT EVERYTHING THIS BAND IS DOING. ugh. i was so right to watch today's livestream. something's gonna happen soon guys. they are warning us.

(i added CUT MY LIP to the playlist but technically it's the judge/cut my lip mashup so there's really not much to say about it)

THE CRAVING + TEAR IN MY HEART

the transition. the goddamn transition!!! it's honestly so fucking cool and probably one of my favourite parts of the tour. i absolutely love all jenna's songs and everyone who says they should not be on the setlist, fuck you forever. in this house we stan all jenna's songs. i usually cry on the craving and tyler is being so silly during tear in my heart - this is my favourite thing in the world. plus, do you really hate the sound of ukulele???

BACKSLIDE

ok, i actually started crying as soon as i realized we're singing backslide now. i love this song so goddamn much, it means the world to me. at one point it was my favourite song from clancy. the chorus breaks my poor little heart every single time and live performance of this song is so emotional... especially at the end when tyler is on his knees (the video is not from tonight's show but it's my favourite one from backslide, please watch it, his vocals here are INSANE). it's like crying for help. i wanna kill myself now. i relate to this song so much. also, backslide is the reason i decided to buy clancy tour tickets, so there's that.

SHY AWAY

oh, thank god this one is on the setlist. you know how much i love scaled and icy and i think out of all the songs from this album shy away is the best one to put on the setlist because the live performance is always so fun!!! don't you shy aWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!! the scream is absolutely fucking everything oh my god. actually, i just love when tyler screams. but don't we all.

HEATHENS + NEXT SEMESTER

ok, now don't hate me, please, but i was never the biggest fan of heathens (i don't hate the song, i like it, just not as much as the others. i probably wouldn't cry if it wasn't on the setlist). however, the transition (again!!!) from heathens to next semester is the best goddamn thing in the entire world and i am losing my mind every single time i come across any clip of this moment. please, watch it, this is everything!!! one question tho: i know tyler was playing bass on the platform for next semester and he didn't do that today, did he just stop doing this recently or is it because of what happened yesterday during the show? (not during this song tho, or at least i know nothing about it, but it seems like LA fans absolutely cannot behave and he was definitely being more careful today, more about it later tho).

ROUTINES IN THE NIGHT

oh boy, this is my vigilante shit for real. remember vigilante shit performance from the eras tour and how everyone was losing their shit when they saw taylor doing the choreography with this motherfucking chair? yes. it's basically that except tyler is fully dressed. which is even worse maybe (y'all know how i feel about his clothes for some reason). one of my favourite songs from the album, but after seeing the live performance for the first time i became absolutely obsessed with the song. i was genuinely scared today because this is basically what happened last night in LA (i swear to god people are acting like fucking animals) and i noticed that tyler was being much more careful this time: he wasn't coming so close to people, and honestly good for him. he didn't even let them touch him during this part. i can't blame him. i feel so bad for what happened. hope he's ok.

ADDICT WITH A PEN + MIGRAINE + FOREST + FALL AWAY

my favourite mashup in the entire fucking world. but before we get into it, please this is so fucking funny and adorable. so basically, before playing the mashup, tyler sat by the piano and he said "currently i'm temperature hot. so i would want to take my jacket off, i promise not to turn on all the dads tonight" and then this happened. poor guy didn't know what to do LMAO. he's such a cutie, please watch the video, he's so adorable i can't. he's also the funniest person on earth. back to the topic, the mashup... i am such a slut for their old songs and this mashup is absolutely fucking insane. the song i love the most out of those is, of course, forest. according to tyler, this song is so old it basically doesn't exist. fuck you, tyler joseph. i can't believe i'm going to hear it live tho, holy shit. i will be fucking SOBBING during this part, i just know that.

MULBERRY STREET

this is such a fun song to play live and one of my favourite moments. you can tell how much fun tyler has each time they play it, also this! this is everything!!! he's always so happy when this happens, he trained us well hahaha. it's so fun omg. can't wait to be a part of it. this has always been one of my favourite songs from scaled and icy so i'm glad they decided to keep it on the setlist.

NAVIGATING

get in, losers. we are entering the lore now. ok, honestly, this part of the tour is absolutely everything to me. torchbearer with his torch? and clancy jacket?? coming to pick him up so they can perform while dema is burning??? AAAAAAAAAAAAAA. oh my GODD. also, navigating is so special to me (i picked this url for a reason) and live performance of this song is fucking fire. watch it. watch the clip. just watch the goddamn clip, will you? we all know this song is on the setlist because of josh, so everybody say thank you josh. also you can tell tyler is very emotional about this song and i just wanna give him a hug. oh my god. i can't wait to hear it live. this will fix me (it will probably make me worse).

NICO AND THE NINERS + HEAVYDIRTYSOUL

the MOTHERFUCKING transition!!! i know i say this a lot but i am such a slut for all the transitions on this tour, oh my god. they are so good. also i absolutely fucking love how we're still in the lore and also, the visuals are absolutely incredible, and also, nico and the niners is one of my favourite songs (the one that got me into their music actually) and also heavydirtysoul live is INSANE and also-

MY BLOOD

ok, i'm sorry, i keep forgetting that this song is on the setlist. it's not one of my favourites (don't fucking hate me, i like it, it's just not my fave). i will be very much singing it at the concert tho cause it's so good live. not much to say about it tho.

OLDIES STATION

boy, here we go. so i started crying at the very beginning of the song and honestly i have no idea how i'm going to handle this live. i am so very normal about this song. it means everything to me. the worst part of it tho was when during the song tyler said "thank you so much for using our music. you've saved us in ways you'll never know". OH MY GOD. i started weeping even more. it's like... their music saved US but we also saved THEM and i need 3-5 business days to recover after that. good lord. listen, i love slowtown and i'm sad that it's not part of the setlist anymore, but i love oldies station a hundred times more and that was a good change me thinks.

FAKE YOU OUT + GUNS FOR HANDS

putting those two together just because i can and i will. vessel is such a great album and it makes me so happy that those two are on the setlist. screaming "our brains are sick but that's okay" with the entire arena is going to fix me, for sure. also, here's the clip of tyler messing up the lyrics (he basically went kjbufbfkkjejkebfkjk after that lmao). can't blame him. the rap part is so fast. i died tho. he's so funny, please.

LAVISH

i can't even begin to explain how happy i am to have this one on the setlist. it's the funniest moment on tour and i love watching them being stupid on stage. also, jOsH iS sHiRtLeSs. the walk, THE WALK LMAO. the best choreography you've ever seen. i just love seeing them so silly and happy and this is everything. i paid a lot of money to see this live. i'm definitely not gonna regret this.

RIDE

so the thing i love about this tour is that every single night while performing this song tyler brings a different kid to sing the chorus with him (it's the equivalent of giving the hat during 22 on the eras tour i would say). tonight we had an adorable girl named callie (if i'm correct). she did so well! also i was giggling so much when tyler said she's cute (he was giggling too hdshfbhekj). i just love watching him with kids, it's so sweet!!! also she had a great beanie with band's logo, i want one too. please watch the clip of them singing together!

PALADIN STRAIT

i was crying. i was crying so much, i love this song and the live performance is so emotional. i put the song bandito on the playlist, because there's this moment in the song where tyler is singing the bridge of paladin strait and josh is singing bandito at the same time and OH MY GOD. DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANS FOR THE LORE??? THIS IS SO CLEVER AND I AM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND EVERY SINGLE TIME I THINK ABOUT IT. please, watch. this is sick as fuck. you don't understand. do you even understand? OR AM I THE ONLY ONE I KNOW???? i'm sorry i just can't i can't i am defeated i am absolutely insane about this part. also, the ending when they are showing the clip of paladin strait music video combined with other clips which looks like a flashback from clancy's life and his never ending battle with nico? the fuck??? and then we go straight to...

JUMPSUIT

the motherfucking coat. not gonna say anything else. just. the coat. oh dear lord. now i am temperature hot.

MIDWEST INDIGO

now my favourite part of midwest indigo is tyler taking off his coat very slowly. because he fucking knows what he's doing. but also, this song is so special to me. i know he wrote it as a love letter to ohio and i'm not even american but somehow this song always makes me think about my hometown. the live performance is so great. the beginning with the bass! he's adorable!

STRESSED OUT

"i don't want stressed out on the setlist it's so overplayed" kill yourself. i love stressed out because i have good taste. it's fun. it's a great song with great lyrics and you fuckers hate it only because it's popular. just shut up. shut the fuck up. in this house we actually enjoy listening to good songs. i personally want it to be on every setlist. if stressed out has no fans it means i killed myself. i'm dead. i'm gone. stressed out defender forever and always. also clancy tour version is incredible. just watch it and shut the fuck up.

TREES

again, i was so scared about my boys because of what happened yesterday in LA. people are fucking animals. i'm so glad, because tyler actually decided to call them out for this and seems like it was much better today. but still. guys please, behave, cause if you're not gonna start acting responsible they are going to stop performing like this. it's still insane compared to the opening night of clancy tour where people didn't even come closer until tyler told them to. i also just noticed now that tyler's t-shirt had black font today (the previous one had red font) for the first time. i think i was just too tired to notice this before. there's not much i can tell you about trees, because you just simply have to be there to understand. it's a perfect song to end the show (for those who don't know: they always close their shows with this one), it's something i experienced live once before and i can't even compare it to anything. i wasn't even crying. my soul literally just left my body. trust me, there's absolutely nothing like trees live. i can show you thousands of clips and it will never be enough. nobody does it like them. seriously. this is the moment. the moment of all moments. i am in fact crying now...

TO SUM IT UP:

great show. 10/10. would recommend. i'm going to see them live in 223 days. this is the thing that makes me want to stay alive. yes. i need to stay alive for this. whoever sent me this ask, thank you. it means the world to me. i need to talk about them because it's the only joy in my life now. they are the reason i want to push on through. also, if you made it this far, thank you. i love you. and i'm sorry.

[bonecarversbestie]

I'm doing this tag bc i've never done one before. thx @zenkindoflove for always tagging me in these even tho i never do them pls don't stop.

Doing this tag feels a little funny since i'm so new to writing and i only have 2 fics, but here we go

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 23,375

3. What fandoms do you write for? ACOTAR

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?  whelp this is awkward bc i only have two 😅

The Scenic Route(Elucien multichapter WIP)

Reverie(Elucien week oneshot)

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! I literally sit by my computer after i post waiting for them to come in bc i love attention.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? N/A. All my angst is in the beginning/middle. my endings are all happy so far.

(Although, I do have a bullet point in my fic ideas file that is a Haunting of Hill House rewrite but Autumn Court/Forest house, and if you've ever read the book, you know that calling the ending "angsty" would be an understatement)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? So Reverie is very short and is sorta set after Elucien have already had their happy ending(in more ways than one ;) The ending of the Scenic Route is also happy and it took way more work to get there, so I'd say that one.

8. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I'm like the writing equivalent of a toddler right now--I'm still learning to write regular stuff haha. I want to write smut one day, but need to take my baby steps to get there. Even when i do, though i think it will not be as explicitly descriptive of the acts themselves, but more emotionally driven (I really like the style of the sex scenes in Song of Achilles if that gives you the vibe)

9. Do you write crossovers? I don't think i'm creative enough for that tbh

10. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope. maybe one day.

11. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have not. I don't even know how that would work esp bc i am a control freak, but i'll never say never.

12. What is your all-time favorite ship? I have a handful of OTPs the primary one right now is obviously Elucien, but I have a special place in my heart for The Doctor and River Song(Doctor Who) and Dramione(who i never really shipped when reading the books, but this was the ship that got me into fanfiction and now i'm addicted)

13. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? So my Current WIP is already completely drafted, i just have to edit and post it, so i'm not worried. I do have an outline of a really long High King Lucien fic started that i worry i won't finish before their book comes out (and that once their book comes out i won't be motivated to write it any more, but we'll see)

14. What are your writing strengths? This is hard because i'm so new to writing, i feel like i don't have any strengths yet, but I'm gonna say dialogue, because it's what i enjoy writing the most. most of my first drafts are very dialogue driven and i fill in the story around the conversations

15. What are your writing weaknesses?  Internal monologues/explaining characters emotions. I tend to leave out details/explanations of a character's feelings because I know what they're feeling and i just expect the reader to inherently know everything that I know even though it's impossible.

16. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I love when people do this, but my spanish and french are both so rusty i don't feel confident enough to try. Maybe some latin in future works for spells and stuff, but in terms of dialogue, probably not.

17. First fandom you wrote for? Acotar! I only just started writing in June of this year, so i haven't had the chance to write for other fandoms yet, but i'd like to eventually.

18. Favorite fic you’ve written? The Scenic Route! i mean i only have two to choose from--and i have a soft spot for Reverie since it was the first fic i ever posted--but I've put a lot of time and love into The Scenic Route, and I'm excited to finish sharing it. ❤️

~*~

I'm not tagging anyone bc i don't know anyone(who wasn't already tagged). 😬

[silly-l1ttle-guy]

bucci gang + la squadra go ice skating

i like making headcanons. also consider this an au where they all just hangout or something idk

------

BRUNO BUCCIARATI

he's never really ice skated before

he's happy to go nevertheless

he gets a hang of it fairly easily

he'll fall down a few times but he gets a good laugh about it

sticks close to Abbacchio

he'll help out Fugo once he's confident enough that he won't fall

he'll talk to the la squadra members when he takes a break from skating

like him and Prosciutto will sit down and talk for a bit

overall he has a good time

LEONE ABBACCHIO

you cannot tell me this man has never ice skated before

he used to take ice skating lessons come on

he's gracefully skating around while everyone else is falling on their asses

except for Ghiaccio, but we'll get to that later

he'll stick close to Bruno in the beginning to make sure he gets the hang of it

after Bruno gets the hang of ice skating, Abbacchio will probably give him a quick kiss and go off on his own

laughs at Giorno when he falls

"HAH! Giorno fell!"

will be offended if anyone laughs at Narancia or Trish for falling though

those are his kids, how dare they?

he'll zoom over to beat their ass

he has a fun time and shows off a lot

GIORNO GIOVANNA

he gets the hang of it after like five minutes

he's a natural at like everything

like he'll fall down a few times, but that's to be expected

and most of the time it's because Fugo's clinging onto him with the tightest grip you can imagine

"GIOGIO DON'T LET GO I'LL SLIP" "I've got you, don't worry"

this boy manages to make everything romantic.

after Fugo get's used to it they'll hold hands and skate around together

it's very cute

Sorbet and Gelato might even comment on how cute they are together (they're alive now. why? because fuck canon, that's why)

he likes to spin

you'll just see Giorno and Fugo spinning together and giggling wildly

then they have to take a break cuz they got too dizzy

he had a very fun time, probably the most fun he's had in a while

GUIDO MISTA

falls flat on his ass the moment he gets on the rink

and every five minutes after that

he'll purposefully stay close to Narancia and Trish, then grab on to them when he's about to fall and brings them down with him

they keep making jokes about each other too

"Damn Trish, I didn't think you'd be so shit at ice skating!" "Shut up Mista, you're lucky the ice can even support your fat-ass" "Yeah, I'm surprised the ice isn't cracking beneath you like in the movies" "Fuck off Narancia, you can hardly see anything with that shit eyesight of yours"

he starts sweating a lot too

Narancia and Trish end up trying to skate away from him because he smells bad

he just chases after them and subjects them to his stink

overall he has a lot of fun

PANNACOTTA FUGO

very wobbly

he just clings to Giorno for most of the time

he just really doesn't wanna slip and fall

not because it'd hurt, but because Narancia, Mista and Trish would tease him about it for weeks

he eventually gets the hang of it and just holds Giorno's hand and skates around with him

he's very peaceful during this time

GIORNO KEEPS SPINNING HIM AROUND AND HE WON'T STOP

they eventually have to take a break because he got too dizzy

Illuso probably makes fun of him for "being weak"

he just threatens him while trying not to throw up

"What? Are you too weak to handle a bit of spinning?" "Don't make me get out Purple Haze..." "HAHA NEVERMIND I WAS KIDDING"

he has a fun time with Giorno :]

NARANCIA GHIRGA

Stays close to Mista and Trish

they do stupid shit together lmao

"Trish I dare you to lick the ice" "EW no! Mista should do it" "WHY AM I BEING TARGETTED?!"

Have I mentioned that they only bully Mista

it's because Mista can take anything they throw at him

like literally he just brushes it off

Narancia falls over like 447837269 times

most of it is Mista's fault tho

I NEED TO STOP TALKING ABOUT MISTA HOLY SHIT

he does a stupid thing and skates over a thin patch of ice

it breaks and he falls in

Abbacchio zooms in to save him lmao

he has to go home early :[

he had a lot of fun though, minus the fact that he fell into the water

TRISH UNA

she's probably pretty good at ice skating

this is her first time, but she likes rollerskating so she gets the hang of it

she stays with Narancia and Mista

also her and Narancia keep bullying Mista, as stated before

she probably convinces Mista to carry her at some point

only for them both to fall

"DAMNIT TRISH! WE FELL BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO FAT!" "SHUT UP, FATTY!"

then they apologize because they feel bad

"You're not actually that fat btw Trish" "Yeah neither are you"

then they go right back to bullying each other

she ends up going home early with Narancia and Abbacchio

she has a really fun time though

RISOTTO NERO

he's so fucking scared of slipping it's hilarious

he's a big guy, everyone's gonna notice

also scared of falling through the ice

the only reason he's there is to make sure no one dies

which means making sure Ghiaccio doesn't kill someone

the ice cracked a little under him and he got so fucking scared lmao

like he just stood there

for five minutes

pissing himself cuz he thought he was gonna fall through

Someone eventually notices that he hasn't moved and comes over to check if he's ok

"Are you all good, Risotto?" "I'm going to fall through the ice. Help."

never again

GHIACCIO

figure skater

it actually calms him

literally everyone is impressed

he might even race Abbacchio if he's feeling up to it

he wins btw

will get mad if he sees someone doing it wrong though

"FORMAGGIO YOU DUMBASS! THAT'S NOT HOW YOU FUCKING SKATE!"

He uses White Album to keep the ice from melting

he's doing everyone a favour fr

ESPECIALLY since Mista is naturally a very warm person

he took warm-blooded seriously

anyway Ghiaccio is very good at ice skating

he has a good time

PROSCIUTTO AND PESCI

Pesci is too scared to get on the ice

Prosciutto bullies him into ice skating

I don't really have any headcanons for these guys

also my fingers are starting to hurt so I gotta wrap it up

they have an ok time

MELONE

he's pretty good at ice skating

stares at people asses while they skate though

that's all from him

he had a good time

FORMAGGIO

dick cheese

makes fun of Narancia for falling

gets beaten by Abbacchio

has to leave early

did not have a good time

ILLUSO

shit at skating

keeps fucking falling

did not have fun

SORBET AND GELATO

romantic

they kiss

and try to give relationship advice to people

"Bruno, we've got some advice for you" "Hey Abbacchio, want some relationship advice?" "GIORNO WE CAN TEACH YOU HOW TO BE A GOOD BOYFRIEND!"

They have fun

[randomgentlefolk]

CPC CHAPTER 164

I'm crying on the ground. Sobbing with my cat yet again. I feel so peaceful and destroyed at the same time.

Lambcat really said we should start the year with a breakdown huh

I'm gonna hold my breakdown until I talk about the moment.

Lance to the rescue!! Man I love that guy. I also really love how he looks in the panel I put as my pfp. He looks so soft and gentle :')

The interaction between Lance and Lorena is rising my hope that they will still be friends after the chaos ends.

This did caught me off guard lmao 😭 I'm sorry for saying this but is he implying that he has a thick skull because nahh he did himself dirty

Y'ALL IT'S THE MOMENT WE'VE (or at least me haha) ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. Lance!!! Fighting against his kingdom!!! I'm so proud of him YOU GO LANCE!!!

Huge respect for Lance and his friends tho for CARRYING THAT HUGE PILLAR LIKE WHAT. Remember when I said something along the line of "if Frederick say he's weak while he can carry an entire llama, then I'm terrified of what Lance can do"? Yea this just proved my point.

Also I'm going to keep saying that Lance is going to have a sick scar with that x mark.

I once again wonder what is the legal age for alcohol in cpc? In US and the country I live in, the legal age is 21. But I think it's 18 in UK right? If it's 18 in cpc then that makes sense because Lance is 19 and Blaine is 20 (i'm saying this because of the beer pong comment by Lance's friend)

Sheesh, I hope Leland will be defeated from the king position soon. I don't want anyone to be executed. That would be disturbing.

Oooh!! Syrah and Saffron probably showing their fighting skill in the future episodes??? I hope so!!

Thank you Maria! It's nice to see that The pastel siblings now believe that Frederick truly loves Gwen.

Feeling like your legs are paralyzed whenever you're gonna face something you're terrified of is so real :( you can do it, Frederick! I believe in you!!

LELAND CHILL???? MAN YOUR HANDS ARE BLEEDING. Eat a snickers damnit. You're not you when you're going through a heart break xd

Oh. Okay. Ouch. Massive ow. Y'know when I said how the Monika's room episode and Frederick's monologue about what he wants really hits for me? Well add this to the list because wtfff.

Aww Gwegg :( She kept blaming herself even though it really isn't her fault. What Gwen said is pretty comforting though. Them apologizing to each other </3 It really is the shit when you realize you haven't treat yourself kindly. Like when you keep wondering why everything is wrong then you look at your inner self and go "oh. That's why".

GWEN SAYING "No matter what happens, I'll never let go of you again!" HAJWHSIWBS

INTOOOOO LEELATHAE'S BACKSTORY!!

*cue 1996 batman transition*

Aww the births of The Pastel Siblings! Though Leelathae's thought during each of the births...it breaks my heart :( it seems that she view the births of The Pastel Siblings as a way to apologize for her "mistake" (in which she didn't make any mistake at all), even though it shouldn't be like that at all...

I'm surprised no animals appear at Maria's birth lol. I was really expecting for a deer or birds to suddenly appear haha.

This IS making me a bit worried though. I don't know much about child births and stuff but while it is normal to still feel pain after giving birth, is it possible that there were some complications leading to Leelathae's dead 3 years after giving birth to Gwen and Jamie? I'll let someone more knowledgeable to figure out what is happening with Leelathae since I have no idea at all.

Anyway! Finally, a close up on Pastel Siblings as babies!! I know we've seen them before in the portraits beside Jack's bed, but it's nice to see them clearer.

Initially, I was worried how Leelathae would react to Gwen, but nevermind that

I'm so happy about this scene :') Leelathae realizing how beautiful Gwen is, even calling her the most beautiful in all the land. Also her saying as long as Gwen thinks she's beautiful, then what other people think doesn't matter makes me sob. Mother love is always something so touching.

On the other hand though, it made me a little confused now on why she asked Jack to lock up the children and never let them out. Looking at one of the fast pass episode's thumbnail, maybe it's because of the witch? We're nearing the end and there are still so many questions.

And now, INTO THE PRESENT! And the moment....

*cue 1996 batman transition*

I'M. I'M GONNA CRY. The fact that Gwen doesn't recognize Leelathae?? The fact that they're wearing the same robe???

WHEN LAMBCAT SAID THERE WASN'T ENOUGH GUT PUNCHES, SHE WAS BEING FR. I don't have anything to say about this scene, but at the same time I want to say a lot about this scene. Gwen's mom telling her that she's beautiful, Gwen crying without knowing why, I'm going to cry.

But hey, Gwegg is finally whole again! True love kiss is real after all ^_^ i love how Lambcat does a little spin at the classic true love kiss. But now that Gwen is finally awake...Well, let's just wish her, Frederick, Aurelia, and Celso good luck at dealing with the officially confirmed big bad wolf/serpent, Leland.

We kinda should thank Leland a bit, though. If he wasn't there ripping off all of the thorny veins, Gwen would get pretty hurt if she still wakes up while sitting up

Yooo the newest fast pass being the final chapter of Leelathae's diary? I hope we will have our questions answered!! And the fact that there's a witch in the thumbnail...hm.

That's it for now!

Mono out! (But still in to hear your thoughts)

[fatuismooches]

FUCK I TOTALLY FORGOT TO SEND YOU AN ASK ABOUT THE FIC... i just got hit full force but like 89831 different fucking projects all at once MY BAD POOKIE BUT UGHHHHHHH oh my god.... part 2??? yes.. all of it is soooo YESS

YESS you visualized everything what you've been talking about how reader would react when they first wake up after centuries and honestly hella realistic EVEN THOUGH I JUST WANNA HOLD READER AND KISS THEIR FOREHEAD 😭😭😭

reader interacting with the segments has my HEARTTT oh my god.. especially omega.. he's SUCH A DEVIOUS MOTHERFUCKEGUJK,,, also reader naming the segments UGHHH i adore that idea so much pleaseee ,, i love how the segments who didn't give a shit suddenly changed their minds when reader said they wanna give them names... THE SWITCH UP AND THE IMMEDIATE DENIAL...

READER MEETING BABY ZANDY ,,, FUCKINGG hell got me sooo soft i wanna hold baby zandy and treat him soo nicely 🥹🥹

ALSO YESS omgg,,, this part has me sooo fucking soft like reader making friends??? with the other harbingers??? i love it... omg they'd be such good besties with columbina,, i think pantalone helps reader adjust to present time as well, especially with it comes with money or the economy (if you ever ask him about it)

but oh.... to top it all off nicely, you gotta sneak in some subtle angst!!! smh... (im so proud of you tho!! like yasss sis feed me sad shit >:333) poor scara and reader :( i think they would've gotten along if reader wasn't dottore's lover n' scara wasn't dottore's experiment ,,,

ALL IN ALL. fuck you pookie im not excited for the next two parts (im kidding I AM IM JUST... NOT READY... pleas epost it next year so i'll be ready enough thank you /jjj) NO SERIOUSLY THIS TIME,, THIS WAS SOOO GOOOD and i love it so much, really popped off honestly (evil laughs because it's dottore)... like im soo happy to see how much you've grown esp thru writing !!!

have a good day pookie, im going back to my grave where i died for the next few days 💗💗

ALSO I WAS GONNA SEND IN ANOTHER DOTTORE IDEA but i fucking forgot again. FUCKS SAKE i hate not writing shit down...

POOKS DONT EVEN WORRY!! Just make sure to take care of yourself ok?? School can really be an ass i understand-

BUT OMG GRENFRG AHHH YOU'RE MAKING ME SMILE TOO MUCH POOKIE AHHWQ I'm so happy you liked it 🥺 BUT NGL I WANNA GIVE READER THE BIGGEST HUG TOO 😭 i put them through too much don't i 😭 dw they will be getting Dottore comfort next chapter!!

Bro i love writing Omega as a devious mf so much 😭 IM SO GLAD U LIKED THAT PART BC I WAS GIGGLING TO MYSELF ABT HOW THEY DGAF ABT THINGS BUT THEN SUDDENLY THEYRE INTERESTED WHEN UR A PART OF IT

AND YESSSS READER MAKING FRIENDS RAHHHH that part was probably really long for a Dottore fic but. i feel like having friends is so important and fragile reader really deserve some niceness in their lives 🥺 AND OMG NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT. Fragile reader would be freaking blown away from inflation. i don't know how prices were four hundred years ago but they would probably be shocked to their core when they see how much expensive things are now?? imagine fragile reader trying to stop Dottore from buying things for them because of how expensive things are now, and they're having flashbacks to being a broke Akademiya student 😭 And Dottore is just honestly finding it amusing to see you freak out and beg him to save his money (it's okay, he's a Harbinger he's loaded) (as long as he's not spending it on experiments)

BUT YEAH MAYBE IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE... reader and Scara could have been friends :( we'll never know... but yasss i will continue to feed you sad shit >:) hehe I CANT WAIT TO POST THE FINAL PART!! ngl the ending of the fic was like. the first thing i wrote for it because it hit me and i was like i CANT forget this. im telling you pookie its gonna be pretty juicy. BUT THANK YOU YOU'RE BEING SO KIND AHHH it's really sweet of you. thank you for being here for so long in my writing journey (and my descent into Dottore madness) ily 🥺

[nogenderbee]

✉ -ˏˋ ℍ𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕪 𝔹𝕚𝕣𝕥𝕙𝕕𝕒𝕪 𝕓𝕒𝕕! ˊˎ

Happy birthday to @wholesaleboi ! HELLO MY FELLOW AN LOVER!!!! I thought I might do this character hehe So hopefully you'll like what I wrote and maybe this little fic can be a good gift for you on this special day!

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Birthday letter

❝HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BAD!!!

I wanted to be the first one to wish you happy birthday and give you my gift, so I hope you don't mind little sneaky enter I did~

And I hope cookies will make it up if you're mad... I made sure they're perfect and your favorite flavor so feel free to have them for breakfast!

Whenever you're ready to go out, just give me a call and I'll take you to a spot I have in mind! Make sure to dress comfortably!

I love you

- An!❞

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Birthday party

↳ ❝ Lively party ❞

An is a lovely soul! So a lively party is perfectly fine with her if you want to have one! She even came early to help with setting everything up and even cooking or baking if you wanted to do those by yourself.

She was definitely all around talking to people, but whenever she noticed or passed by you... she just had to stop and check up on you!

That's why, while talking with your friend, you randomly fair a pair of arms wrap around you from behind.

"How's my birthday person doing~?"

"Hehe~ Oh I'm having fun. You?"

"Oh amazing! You threw a great party love!"

She reassured and finally ley go of you, not moving next to you so you could keep eye contact while talking.

"But you know... I feel like we should have a little dance when you're free!"

She offered not wanting to just ruin your conversation like that and instead deciding to patiently wait. Your friend on the other hand apparently felt what's going on and was quick to excuse themselves.

"It's fine~ Have a dance right now. I'll go get something to drink."

"Alright... See you later!"

"Well c'mon!! New song is about to begin in a second, I'm sure!"

She took your hand into hers and literally dragged you to the dance floor seemingly excited to have some fun with her partner!

↳ ❝ Calm party ❞

An doesn't really mind! If you prefer those, she can totally understand why. And honestly... she likes the thought of you two spending this day together with no one else around~ Tho she'll still probably take you to dance or karaoke!

Though for now... she's just comfortably staying on couch with you playing your favorite board game!

"Alright, new round!! Let's make a bet this time, what do you think?"

"A bet? Well I'm down I guess... Tho it depends what do you want to bet on?"

"Oh, nothing like gambling! Don't worry! I thought maybe just... The looser has to be the little spoon~?"

"Heh~ Wanna baby me tonight? Well fine, game on!"

"Now you're in~"

She hummed and turned on her competitive mode, ready to snatch that prize right from your nose! Just because it's your birthday doesn't mean she'll to easy on you when prize like that is on the line~

But in the end, the two of you have fun anyway! So can the looser can really be mad if they're getting bear hugs afterwards?

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

No tags because it's meant for just bad alone!

[lightgriffinsect]

happy 1 year anniversary to fnf vs radi muzix medley

the friend of my friend is my enemy

(Friday Night Funkin')

Words: 2058

Summary:

"Yeah, so uh, it's not just gonna be us here," Void casually brings it up with the two of them over coffee. "Oh?" Sumire's gaze snaps up eagerly. They're still getting used to being in the same room as their idol on a regular basis. Void doesn't blame him. Who wouldn't be, when it's A.C. Void? "Oh?" Radi also glances up at him, much less enthused. Ugh. He could try to show a little cheer. "Mhm. I have another, uh, friend coming. He's a psychic." "Ooh! What's his name?" Sumire is really eager. "Psychic."

Posted on 24th September in honor of Muzix Medley's 1 year anniversary. Hap annivers to Radi and Lofie!

Psyfic taglist: @y010isaghost, @s0methingmoonlit, @flurriethefox, @hoodiehydra

Let me know if you want to be added to/removed from the taglist!

Psi:

btw did you remember to tell radi and sumire

Void:

Oh right

Oops

Psi:

void.

Void:

LOOK MAN IM SORRY

IM A VERY BUSY GUY

I'll tell them now

they'll be chill dw

And if u already know they're here why r u worried

Psi:

yeah i bet

because they don't know about me

Void:

THEY WILL

Bro relax it'll be great

Sumire loves ppl

Psi:

don't call me bro

and uh

radi exists too

and you know how much he likes people like me

especially me

Void:

No one says we have to tell him

Psi:

he's going to think dd was playing the long game

and that you were complicit

and he'll probably try to kill you

and me

but sure i like this

Void:

Keyword TRY

And he knows I would never coop with DD

Cmon u can't back out now cousin

Psi:

technically cousin i could

Void:

Dude no Accretions are hard to find

And how will u get back without a chauffeur

Psi:

i can drive

unlike some people

but fine

Void:

I should cancel you

Psi:

can't have air conditioner void caught up in public family drama tho

Void:

DONT CALL ME THAT

But fine. Sure.

Psi:

thanks for sparing me cousin

now go spoil the plot twist to radi and sumire

don't want to give them a heart attack

Void:

Okok fine bye

----------

"Yeah, so uh, it's not just gonna be us here," Void casually brings it up with the two of them over coffee.

"Oh?" Sumire's gaze snaps up eagerly. They're still getting used to being in the same room as their idol on a regular basis. Void doesn't blame him. Who wouldn't be, when it's A.C. Void?

"Oh?" Radi also glances up at him, much less enthused. Ugh. He could try to show a little cheer.

"Mhm. I have another, uh, friend coming. He's a psychic."

"Ooh! What's his name?" Sumire is really eager.

"Psychic."

"Ooh."

"And you didn't tell us this before?" Radi scowls faintly.

"I mean, I think you can handle it," Void can't help sniping back. "He's fine. He doesn't bite. You've gotta relax, man."

“I know, I’m sorry, I just…” Radi gives a little sigh. “You know I’m not very good with new people. I just wish you had let us know sooner so I could feel…more prepared.”

Void raises a brow.

“But I’m sure you know him best, so I’m willing to let it go,” Radi adds hastily.

“Great!” Void claps once, letting the grin overtake his face once more. “Thank you, Radi.”

“How’d you guys meet?” Sumire prods, ignoring his coffee now, all too intrigued by Void’s little info drop. This is why he never tells anyone anything about his social life. Blegh.

“We were…uhm. We were at the same music event thing. A couple years back now, I think.” Truth. Kind of. They might’ve gotten off on a better foot from the beginning if Psi hadn’t been clinging to his beloved Dearests, Void recalls with a bitter smile.

“Oh, he makes music?” If there’s one thing Void would change about Sumire, it’s their habit of getting way too invested in other people’s business. Always the same with fans-turned-friends. Starts out endearing, flattering, among a sea of annoying faceless supporters. Ends up just another one of them.

“I mean...yeah.” Half-truth. Void angles for more of a well duh, fool tone rather than the initial I dunno, I’m just bluffing about his life so you guys don’t panic.

It’s not even a bluff, technically. Psychic can sing. Irritatingly well, in fact, and it’s a miracle Void’s managed to get even that much out of him. He’s still trying to get the guy to spill his big secret; how he beat the little blue brat in a song battle.

“That’s great!” Sumire, clueless as ever, practically jumps for joy. “We’ve all got that in common, so this should be fun!”

“Exactly.” Void smiles. Fun.

He and Psi better not regret this.

----------

Radi probably shouldn’t have let it go so easily.

The front door swings open, a cold breeze sweeping through, as a well-dressed young flamehead nonchalantly lets himself in, to a whoop from Void.

He’s taller than Radi expected. And more purple. If they weren’t so obviously two separate species, Radi might have assumed Psychic and Void were somehow related. Fourth cousins, or something like that.

Although, Radi’s not entirely sure what he had been expecting. Someone more…stereotypical? Someone tiny, lugging around crystals and amulets with the scent of burning incense trailing behind? Someone who’d likely speak in crypts and vague allusions?

Psychic is none of those things. As he greets Void and turns piercing magenta eyes on the two friends-turned-outsiders, Radi can’t help but feel like this man knows him.

He resists the urge to step protectively in front of his friend. It’s a little silly, he knows, Psychic is barely Sumire’s height, but something in his confident stance, the way he surveys Radi with cold, newfound interest, is more intimidating than it should be.

He should have known better, really. A.C. Void is not one to make friends with a stereotype.

Psychic doesn’t extend a hand. Neither does Radi. They just sort of not-glare at each other while Void not-glares at both of them to Get Along Before He Blows Apart This Entire Star System.

Psychic speaks first. “Well, hi. You must be Radi and Sumire.” His voice, low and smooth, echoes throughout Radi’s mind. Not a voice. Telepathy?

“And you’re Psychic, right? It’s great to meet you!” Sumire pipes up before Radi can say anything. Their sunny-side-up attitude is his only source of reassurance right now, that he’s not alone.

Psychic blinks, his shoulders easing. “That’s right. Pleased to meet you as well.” His gaze flicks between the two of them, eyes narrowing as they land on Radi. “Void’s already told me a bit about you two.” He knows how to be civil. He knows how to lie. Okay, Radi notes.

Void, far too self-absorbed to talk about anyone else, now and forever, herds them away from the door and down the hall. "You guys need to help me peer pressure Psi into revealing his big secret."

Big secret? Radi can believe that. Psychic has been watching him too intently for too long now.

"He beat Boyfriend-dot-freakin’-XML in a rap battle." Void makes a face, does a little flourish. Oh. That. "And he's gonna tell us how he did it. Right, Radi?"

You are not dragging me into your weird spat with that kid, Radi wants to retort. The problem was never he beat me in a rap battle. The problem was he wouldn't leave me alone and what if Lofie finds out where I’ve been because of him. He can't trust anyone, after all. Except his baby sister. And she can't be that for him anymore.

Void doesn't get it. As always.

“Right,” Radi presses his lips together. “Psychic, Void mentioned that you make music.”

“Ooh, yeah, right!” Sumire jumps in enthusiastically. “Is that like what you do for a living, or is it just a hobby?”

Psychic stiffens, giving Void a side scowl. Does he not want anyone knowing he sings? That’s a heavy contrast, isn’t it, given Psychic is supposed to be friends with A.C. Void? “Sometimes,” he relents, almost tentatively. “It’s only a hobby, not really something I do very often. My real interests lie elsewhere.” He avoids looking at any of them.

“What else are you into?” Sumire encourages.

"I like to read,” Psychic answers immediately, like it’s a default response. “Classics, mostly. And mysteries. What about you?”

“I don’t read a lot,” Sumire admits, “but I like manga! Usually I just listen to music and hang out with Radi.”

"Mhm.” Psychic glances back at Radi and Void before resuming conversation with them. He seems to be taking kindly to their constant stream of questions. At least Radi’s friend should be okay.

Void flashes a too-blinding grin at him. “I told you he doesn’t bite.”

“Yeah, I got it.” Radi manages a small, conciliatory smile. “You were right.”

Psychic doesn’t seem particularly fazed by the... Voidness of this house. He treats it with a sort of familiarity, like he’s accustomed to the grandeur, the almost arrogance of it all. It makes Radi wonder what background he comes from, how he got so used to being friends with someone like…well…

Void’s nice enough, but there’s a sharpness to him Radi has never entirely been able to shake off. It’s been there since their first song onstage together. A pointed focus not on their friendship, not on his fans, but on something else entirely. Radi still hasn’t figured out what it could be, what drives Void to be so…what he is.

The most prominent thing about Psychic is his stare. Even as he’s talking to Sumire and Void about books and music, every once in a while his intense gaze will snap back to Radi, as if trying to catch him off guard and see into his mind. He’s been regarding him with unnerving confidence, as if he knows something Radi doesn’t and wouldn’t hesitate to use that to his advantage. Radi swallows.

He could never be like Void, like Psychic, with their cool gazes and smug demeanors and the sparks of unearthly power in their eyes.

“So, Psychic, you’re from Earth, right?” Sumire is saying. “I live there too! Which area are you from?”

“I’ve been living in Newgrounds City for most of my life,” Psychic responds casually. He doesn’t confirm whether he’s actually from Earth, Radi notes.

Sumire stops dead. “Really? That’s insane, so have I! How have we not met already?”

“It’s a large area,” Void points out quickly. “And I think he’s in a different part of the city than you guys. It’s, uh, it’s not that surprising, honestly.”

“Obviously,” Psychic mutters. “I don’t actually go out that much either. I’m usually too busy for that.”

“What do you do?” Radi knits his brows. How much can he find out about this man before Psychic catches on?

Psychic and Void exchange an uncomfortable look. They were planning something beforehand, he realizes. But before Radi can say anything, Psychic starts, “There’s this family whose business I help…manage. It’s good pay.” His tone makes it clear that’s all he’s saying.

“And part of that includes beating Boyfriend-dot-freakin’-XML in a song battle?” Radi can’t resist. “Or does that count as a hobby?”

“Radi—” Void and Sumire yelp at the same time.

“No, no, it’s okay.” Amusement gleams in Psychic’s eyes. “Both.”

“Both?”

“Yes.” Psychic doesn’t elaborate.

“Well, do you ever plan to explain how you managed that?” Radi tries. He’s trying. Void can’t say he’s not trying.

"Nope."

“Well.” Radi turns to Void. “I have done all I can do.”

“Oh, come on!” Void bursts out. “You hate him just as much as I do, why aren’t you gonna do this for us?!”

“Because it’s more complicated than that,” Psychic sighs.

“How can it possibly be more complicated—“

“Guys,” Sumire interrupts pleadingly. “That’s enough. You can fight about Boyfriend later. Can’t we talk about something else?”

The way Psychic and Void both glower at him, Radi hopes Sumire hasn’t sealed his own fate.

“...Fine,” Void yields. He turns to Psychic. “But if you keep holding out, I might actually cancel you.”

“Uh-huh.” Psychic scoffs. “‘Course you would, cousin.” Cousin? The absolute can of worms that is this pair’s relationship.

“Come on, already.” Sumire rolls their eyes, dragging Void into the kitchen. “Let’s get a snack! Let’s watch a movie or something! Psychic, do you like Marvel?”

"I hate Marvel.”

Void brightens. “That’s perfect, actually! We can make fun of the bad storylines together! And talk about how much better I could do as a director!”

“Exactly!” Sumire cheers.

"That…actually does sound fun,” Psychic admits. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Radi echoes. Maybe he can gauge Psychic’s true intentions better if they spend more time doing casual stuff like this. Maybe it will be fun and Radi has just been paranoid this whole time. Maybe he’s been reading too deeply into Psychic’s mannerisms, the numbing cold in his eyes every time they meet Radi’s.

Probably not, but it’s a soothing idea to think about. He holds on to it anyway.

----------

[freckledjoes]

how do u think st5 will end? i think eleven will sacrifice herself for will, before he dies, probably mike dies?? her powers would be strong enough to sacrifice and save hawkins. nancy stays single and travels away for a job/collage or something, steve gets himself a girlfriend, finally. please. he wants to be the stay at home mom with his kids. nancy clearly didn’t look like she wants that life cause she doesn’t, i really don’t understand why he’s still stuck on her even after so many years after their breakup, it’s silly. max wakes up. jopper will get married!! pls i need that to come true.. dustin survives vecna’s curse, idk will nancy get possessed too? and who’s the new lady that’s been introduced as a new character?? steve’s mom maybe?? or the mayoress of hawkins?? i want all the town to help the main group but still i don’t want it to be the second avengers endgame pls… omg could vecna possibly use his victims against our main characters? alsoo, i don’t want the ending scene where nancy and steve are in the car saying we’ve seen stranger things, it’s too corny for my liking pls no… and i like the time travel thing idea.. (going back in time so vecna would turned on his dark side.. this would be really easy way out, tho i hope it won’t happen lol?).. i’d really want eddie returning as a vampire, not really like coming from the dead, that would ruin everything probably (even tho i’d wanted it in heartbeat) buuut yk what i mean right? something like billy came back in max’s visions so eddie would come like this to dustin’s visions. the worst possible ending, is blood bath, there’s been a lot demand for a body count. i feel like modern audiences are more into stuff like game of thrones, walking dead.. stuff like that… killing characters casually. i’m not saying i don’t want a character or three dying tho! i’d be happy if they’d killed off two or three of the main characters finally, they always kill a new character that the audience like and then the audience is always mad. why is that?? we’ve already lost bob and eddie. should it be that way?? i’m really scared steve is going to die bc he was supposed to die in s1, if he does die i’m gonna riot against their stupid writing (that brings me getting stancy back together again). pls get him a girlfriend, a happy life he dreams about and don’t let him hang up on nancy anymore, he deserves better.. he’s changed.. also it needs to stay to the 80s show vibes and has the happy ending as well.. what do you think?? what are your thoughts? :D

I had to write down all your thoughts as bullet points so I could acknowledge them in my reply lmao. Loving this elaborate thought blurb! Alright, so I do think there will be some sacrificing going on, I'd see either Will or El doing it for Mike. Part of me thinks one of those two might die, but on the other hand I don't see them doing it. Why? 'Cause it would fuck up Jopper. And they spent a lot of time on Jopper. Hopper can't lose another kid and we've seen how Joyce handled Will's missing. Not saying this is logical, but it's what I think anyway. Maybe an almost death. Like one of them going in knowing they will probably die and saying goodbye- maybe, and then surviving. I feel like Max might get a more important role than we anticipate. Something about her showing up for El at the moment she needs her the most. Like in the mind thing. I'm worried for Lucas, that poor boy is suffering. :( Assuming Jopper survives - which I do think they will - I wouldn't be surprised if we get a Jopper wedding as a way of a corny happy ending. I don't expect anything mindblowing if I'm very honest, the fan theories have been so good that I fear disappointment for most of us lol. And well, considering many things - I also don't really care if it flops. I'll just enjoy seeing some of my sweet characters one last time before their actors go off into bigger and better projects. <3 Anyway, back to it. If they bring back Eddie, it's definitely gonna give us more pain than gain. He'll hurt Dustin, bet. As wonderful as the Kas ideas are, I don't see it happening considering what I mentioned in the previous paragraph. It's too good. I either see him show up in a Vecna vision or some kind of undead army thing. Both will suck. Imagine Dustin, who is literally embodying Eddie right now, is face to face with his dead friend. Yikers. Idk about the new lady, I'm honestly bored out of my ass that they added a new character for the last season. "Here's a new character to care about - or not - but they're gonna die once you get attached!" - so yeah, not many thoughts there. It'll be too brief. I don't see the town doing anything other than vandalize Eddie's grave and somehow find a way to blame the goddamn earthquake on him honestly. Steve and Nancy... fingers crossed it doesn't happen. For me anyway! For those that ship them, good luck getting it your way~ But yeah, I don't see the appeal, but I do feel how they're pushing it onto us hard. It wouldn't surprise me if Steve dies trying to protect Nancy and that we'll get a stupid nugget speech similar to Eddie's sheep speech. I really need that all to not happen. But don't wanna get too deep into ships, I just don't think that outcome would be sensible for either character. That said, Steve getting a partner (an unknown character) would be nice, but if I'm really honest I'd much rather they all leave it open to our interpretation. If we're getting a cliche ending of some future thing, just throw me the Jopper wedding or Steve and Robin (platonically) moving out of Hawkins together, away from that hellhole. This has become a mix of what I think might happen vs what I want to happen I guess, but these are my thoughts! And anyway, no matter what happens, we will always have a 1000+ fixit fics :)