#i’ve had this blog/account for like a week and it’s already been very enriching

[whimperaudioconnoisseur]

nothing better than taking your bra off after a long day

tip or treat 🖤

[theculturedmarxist]

Decolonization is not a metaphor

Kind of sucks for a lot of reasons, many of which I think are illustrated in their section about Occupy Oakland. (pg 25, 26)

As  detailed  by  public  intellectuals/bloggers  such  as Tequila  Sovereign(Lenape  scholar Joanne Barker), some Occupy sites, including Boston, Denver, Austin, and Albuquerque tried to engage  in  discussions  about  the  problematic  and  colonial  overtones  of  occupation  (Barker, October  9,  2011). Barker  blogs  about  a  firsthand  experience  in  bringing  a  proposal  for  a Memorandum  of  Solidarity  with  Indigenous  Peoples,18 to  the  General  Assembly  in  Occupy Oakland.  The memorandum, signed by Corrina Gould, (Chochenyo Ohlone-the first peoples of Oakland/Ohlone), Barker, and numerous other Indigenous and non-Indigenous activist-scholars, called  for  the  acknowledgement  of  Oakland  as  already  occupied  and on stolen  land; of  the ongoing  defiance  by  Indigenous  peoples  in  the  U.S.  and  around  the  globe  against  imperialism, colonialism,  and  oppression;  the  need  for  genuine  and  respectful  involvement  of  Indigenous peoples  in  the  Occupy  Oakland  movement; and  the  aspiration  to  “Decolonize  Oakland,”  rather than  re-occupy  it. From  Barker’s  account  of  the  responses  from  settler  individuals  to  the memorandum,

Ultimately,  what  they  [settler  participants  in  Occupy  Oakland]  were  asking  is whether  or  not  we  were  asking  them,  as  non-indigenous  people,  the impossible? Would their solidarity with us require them to give up their lands, their resources, their ways of life, so that we –who numbered so few, after all –could have more? Could have it all? (Barker, October 30, 2011)

These responses, resistances by settler participants to the aspiration of decolonization in Occupy Oakland, illustrate  the  reluctance  of  some  settlers  to  engage  the  prospect  of  decolonization beyond  the  metaphorical  or  figurative  level. Further,  they  reveal  the  limitations  to  “solidarity,” without  the  willingness  to  acknowledge  stolen  land  and  how  stolen  land  benefits  settlers. “Genuine solidarity with indigenous peoples,” Barker continues, “assumes a basic understanding of  how  histories  of  colonization  and  imperialism  have  produced  and still  produce the  legal  and economic possibility for Oakland” (ibid., emphasis original). 

For  social  justice  movements,  like  Occupy,  to  truly  aspire to  decolonization  non-metaphorically, they would impoverish, not enrich, the 99%+ settler population of United States. Decolonization eliminates settler property rights and settler sovereignty. It requires the abolition of land as property and upholds the sovereignty of Native land and people.

The only thing more shocking than already impoverished people rejecting the call to impoverish themselves further because of events that occurred hundreds of years before they were born is that a majority of the GA supported the endeavor, just not enough for it to actually carry.

SUNDAY AFTERNOON GA: DECOLONIZE

Although I had participated in many of the marches and demonstrations in the fall, including the stunning shutdown of the Port of Oakland, my involvement really began December 4, 2011.  That week, the Sunday GA moved from the evening to 2:00 in the afternoon.  We met in Oscar Grant Plaza (OGP), the Oakland civic center previously named Frank Ogawa Plaza.  It was renamed when it was the site of the OO encampment, which was violently evicted; it was now tenuously claimed by an ongoing 24 hour vigil and the GAs several times a week.

There were a lot of people at this GA.  I had no idea that we would be considering a highly contentious proposal.  A group of Native people were proposing renaming Occupy Oakland—to be called “Decolonize Oakland.”  A term describing colonization and expropriation was not one they wanted to claim for our movement, and they wanted their history acknowledged.

GAs began with an introduction, including the hand signals of approval (twinkling fingers), disapproval (limp fists nicknamed “Quan hands” after our mayor) and impatience (rolling arms to signal time to wrap up a rambling or off-topic speech).  Then we separated into smaller groups for the “forum discussion.”  The topic this week was “What does Occupy mean to you?”  This turned out to be ambiguous and led many groups to focus on the proposed name change.  There were many groups of about twenty people each.  In my group the participants were diverse, respectful and lively.

What was supposed to happen next was report backs about forum discussions, with people summarizing what went on in different groups.   It soon became clear that dozens of people were lining up “on stack” for a chance to speak for or against the motion.  It seemed impossible to maintain the GA agenda structure.  As I remember it, the facilitators took a straw pool to check in about changing the sequence, although some were disgruntled by this procedural move.

I was impressed by the diversity of speakers, the range of opinions, the level of passion and the skill of the two young facilitators.  At one point one of them slowed things down by reminding us all of the emotions expressed at this GA—anger, pride, anxiety, conviction, excitement—I don’t remember the specifics but I remember thinking, “I’ve gone to political meetings for decades and I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone speak explicitly about the feelings in the room.”

The defenders of the Occupy “brand” spoke about the national impact of the shared name, but I remember thinking, “if we can’t even change our name after four months, how can we change the world?”  I even got on stack to say this, but there was a very long line ahead of me and I had to leave before getting a chance (by then the GA had lasted more than three hours).

At that time the operating rules of the GA considered a 90% vote to be a consensus, approving the proposal, and allowed for amendments if 70 to 90% of the group voted in support of a proposal.  I found out later that 68% had voted in favor and that the supporters of Decolonize had separated from OO as result.  A couple of weeks later, on December 16, the GA shifted to the concept of a “living document” that could be amended on the spot, if the proposers agreed.  I wonder whether that GA could have endorsed a compromise hybrid name like Decolonize/Occupy Oakland, and what might have been different if we had–or if we hadn’t been able to even do that.

I was impressed with the GA I attended as a vivid example of “direct democracy.”  At the same time, the damage was evident.  Some supporters of the indigenous people resented disrespectful treatment of their elders, while some of their allies made accusations of racism against the people who wanted to hold onto the name of Occupy.  As I understand it, Decolonize Oakland continued to exist as a separate group and sometimes participated in shared actions with OO, but this GA prevented greater ongoing unity.

(Note: the minutes of this GA can be read at http://occupyoakland.org/2011/12/ga-minutes-12-4-11/  and the proposal can be read at http://occupyoakland.org/2011/12/emergency-proposal-3-on-queue-for-december-4-2011-ga-proposal-to-decolonize-oakland-creating-a-more-radical-movement/)

From the minutes:

F: We’re going to change this topic.  Please discuss: What does this movement mean to you?

The historical context of “occupy” doesn’t fit with the goals of this movement.

Newer people who are just discovering that they are oppressed need to respect the work and presence of those who have already been in the struggle.

People are responding to what we are doing, not to our name.  They are excited about the larger connection to the national movement.

As a daughter of Texas and as a single mom, I think we should stay in keeping with ancestors and elders to rename the space.

We, the congregation of First Christian Church of Oakland,  advocate that this movement be renamed Decolonize Oakland.  We would also advocate for CoExist in Oakland, to embrace all people.

The original intent was to occupy the seat of power.

The term occupy is racist.  In these movements across the country, few people of color are involved.  We have this opportunity to step up.

The history of Wall Street is built on the colonization of the indigenous people, and the slavery of Africans on the land.  The seats of power are within us – we do not need to use the same paradigm of “taking seats of power.”

F: Many people are speaking about a proposal in queue, and are not speaking about the topic, “What does this movement mean to you?”  Please make your comments about the topic.

This must be divine timing.  We did talk about the forum topic.  We accept the concept of “occupy” but we think that it’s time for a change that will reflect everyone’s histories and voices.

In our group, some people liked the term “occupy” because it’s a good brand and it connects to OWS.  We agree that all people’s voices should be heard, but we don’t know how to make decolonize, liberate, and occupy meld together as one.  Some people in our group preferred “liberate” than “decolonize” because “de-“ sounds negative.

This is an opportunity to hold corrupt systems accountable and to protest people who are vulnerable in these systems

F: Let’s see who would like to go straight to the vote?  Who would like to go to pros and cons?  We could try hearing 2 pros and 2 cons.  It seems like many people would like to speak.  We will hear as many as we can.

Pros

I am in support of this proposal as a white person.  I stand in solidarity with all people in the movement. We need to support this proposal on the principle of people who are left out of this movement.

We need to acknowledge that some of us have white privilege.

As Jewish person, I cannot support Palestinian people in a movement named “Occupy.”

We will only be weakened when using the language of our oppressors. The divisiveness here today is a symptom of colonization.  We need to listen to those who are most affected.  Let’s do it.

This language shows how colonized our minds are.  Let’s change the status quo.

I will vote yes on this if the people behind the proposal put their lives into increasing the movement.

I do not want to fly on the coattails of imperialism.

People can understand that we are a part of the global movement, just like “Arab Spring” or “Los Indignados.”

One way that violence is perpetuated is through language.

This issue is not just about indigenous people.  It’s about recognizing the history of the shoulders we stand on.

This proposal has pushed the envelope of this conversation.  It has made you uncomfortable – welcome to my world.  This emergency has been on hold for over 500 years. 

We are more than a brand. Let’s occupy, decolonize, and liberate this.

Cons

Feelings are more important than words.  Words change.  Occupy is used throughout the movement, so we should keep that word. We have broken the process by allowing an emergency proposal to be heard that is not an emergency. 

We have also allowed proposers to speak for 10 minutes.  I am an occupant.  I live here.  I’m not stating an opinion about the name change.  We have not had time to develop this conversation.

[...]

Vote Results:

68.5 % approval: THIS PROPOSAL HAS BEEN TABLED

YES: 198

ABSTAINED: 19

NO: 91

(After some cheering, much confusion and agitation ensued.   Several people started chanting “Decolonize Oakland” for about five minutes.) IMPROMPTU ANNOUNCEMENT(This was said in the midst of the crowd with the People’s Mic, not within the GA process). No matter how you voted, please realize something. Everyone has a place here.  We all need to recognize the power of this conversation.  We want people to come out and be part of Occupy Oakland.  Figure out what you want.  Start listening to the people!  Be about it!  I love you all!! (Another voice…partially muffled – I couldn’t hear everything amidst arguing and people have side conversation). We might  hold our own GA.  Stay connected with us.  We have more work ahead of us.

======================================================

So a movement divided and a bunch of time wasted over a name change because some people didn’t think that their cause was being acknowledged enough. And even after a vote in which most people actually supported the motion and then actually left to form their own Decolonize Oakland group or whatever, they still get libeled as a bunch of callous “settlers”.

Between DINAM and Settlers, if these are the products of Decolonization theory then I can’t see any good in it. It sounds like it wants to pretend to be egalitarian and anti-property, while at the same time privileging one group above all others and ensuring their own property rights to their land, at the expense of everyone else living on it. And yes, at the expense of everyone else living on it:

Not unique, the United States,as a settler colonial nation-state, also operates as an empire-utilizing  external  forms  and  internal  forms  of  colonization  simultaneous  to the  settler  colonial project. This  means,  and  this  is  perplexing  to  some, that  dispossessed  people  are  brought  onto seized   Indigenous   land   through   other   colonial   projects.   Other   colonial   projects   include enslavement,   as   discussed,   but   also   military   recruitment,   low-wage   and   high-wage   labor recruitment     (such     as     agricultural     workers     and     overseas-trained     engineers),     and displacement/migration  (such  as  the  coerced  immigration  from  nations  torn  by  U.S.  wars  or devastated  by  U.S.  economic  policy).  In  this  set  of  settler  colonial  relations,  colonial  subjects who  are  displaced  by  external  colonialism, as  well  as racialized  and  minoritized  by  internal colonialism, still occupy and settle stolen Indigenous land. Settlers are diverse, not just of white European  descent,  and  include  people  of  color,  even  from  other  colonial  contexts.  This  tightly wound  set  of  conditions  and  racialized,  globalized  relations  exponentially  complicates  what  is meant by decolonization, and by solidarity,against settler colonial forces.

So when they’re saying “to support us you have to impoverish all the settlers, ie, everyone that isn’t us,” they’re being very literal. It’s just more bourgeois identity politics cooked up by privileged people in academic institutions.

Into the trash it goes.

[overtopsdev]

Lessons from Side Projects

As we’ve mentioned on here to some extent already, both Harry and Shane set out to make this game with a few specific mutual goals in mind. The exact nature of the game came from multiple musings in the past of “why don’t you see more of that? Seems pretty doable right? We should do that one day.” So we did (are).

But, there were many more culminating motivations that really got the momentum going early, and the commitment to see this through kicked into high gear quickly. For one thing, our students are currently in their end of year projects, and this seemed like a great opportunity to “show, not tell”, and actually put our money where our mouths claim to be when it comes to executing on the things that we say in class on a daily basis.

“Yep, that sure is a video game”

There are many reasons why someone might want to create a video game. This topic alone has fuelled many a long and winding conversation between ourselves, our colleagues and our contemporaries.

This post isn’t about most of the possible answers to that question, but rather 2 specific, and inherently linked answers that I’m sure everyone reading this can relate to.

Firstly, there is the desire to creatively engage with something you love and that has enriched your life and contributed to you becoming the person who you are. Secondly, there is the desire to have had created something. There is no feeling in the world like being able to point at something and go “I made that”.

The former is an easy itch to scratch, but the latter, it can feel like climbing Everest, like travelling to the north pole, and like landing on the moon, all rolled into one.

The former, the desire to create, and not just create but to contribute to the culture we love and live in. That’s not only a significant driving force behind why most of us get into this line of work, but why we also maintain it as a hobby, even when it is our profession, why many of us have “side projects”. The very nature of a side project is that it is doing something off your own back for the intrinsic love of the thing itself, without extrinsic motivators being the driving force. However, without extrinsic motivators, without something forcing you to meet your goals, that’s how the latter, the “having had made something” becomes seemingly so out of reach most of the time.

As we put it in the very first post on this blog; “starting something is easy”. And it can feel like you are really achieving something too. Combine that with the enthusiasm that comes with having a great cultural love for something, it can be very easy to start thing after thing after thing, and never finish any of them. Learning how to “finish” something, is the hardest skill you will ever learn in your professional creative life.

And that’s when it’s just you working on the thing…

This becomes exponentially compounded with every person involved in a thing, if that thing is purely a passion project, if there are no extrinsic motivators. Because not only does every individual have these hurdles to overcome, but they have to also be overcome in a way such that the planets all align for everyone involved.

Harry and Shane (and we would guess probably most people working in games professionally), have worked on many, many side projects over the years. How many of them have ever been “finished” and released to the public? Well, let’s just say it’s not exactly all of them. In fact, Harry and Shane have collaborated on a side project together before, a few years ago with a mutual programmer friend of ours.

Looks pretty cool right?

Will it ever get finished? Not likely. Maybe, but not likely. There are a variety of reasons for this, but as alluded to above, they pretty much all boil down to lack of extrinsic motivators.

When you are relying purely on intrinsic motivation, you have to pretty much be as invested in a thing as you are in breathing, and that is very rare indeed. We realised while working on this game that it was going nowhere, and that we had kind of got out of it all that we could. “Releasing” it wouldn’t have made any difference. It was a failed experiment. But that’s ok, we learn way more from our failures than our successes.

One such lesson is one our students are probably used to hearing both of us bang on about in class all the time: daily routine. Reps. Habit forming behaviours. When we were working on the above game, we would only put in 2-4 hours one night every few weeks. This is no way to build good habits or get anything done at all really, and so enthusiasm dropped off a cliff pretty fast.

And of course, I’ve been spending most of this post talking about extrinsic motivators, which I would say are probably the number 1 key factor in whether something gets finished or not. So when you don’t have any built in extrinsic motivators like “it’s your job, and you’ll get the sack if you don’t do it”, you have to set your own, constructed extrinsic motivators to ensure you meet the goals you set for yourself. Otherwise, it’s all just daydreaming and goes nowhere.

So, we set some pretty obvious extrinsic motivators for ourselves, which should ensure that we actually finish this thing. The big one is staring you in the face right now. By holding ourselves to account by writing about it every day, and showing our students our progress, we have to finish it, there’s no option not to now.

Honestly (and we have another blog post planned on this as a broader topic), but habit forming, progress, “getting stuff done”, can largely be boiled down to “hacking your brain”. Our brains are kind of accidentally against us all the time, but if you know how it works enough to set up structures around yourself, you can “trick” yourself into desired behaviour. Like making a maze out of salt for a snail… the snail will run the convoluted maze you have set for it, not because it loves mazes, but because the alternative is even worse.

Because there’s been a distinct lack of pictures in this post so far, here are some solo side projects from Harry and Shane that may or may not see completion one day…

Who knows, maybe what we learn from finishing Overt Ops will be the secret sauce to get one or more of these other projects out the door one day

[vivalazeny]

I’m 100% for speaking things into existence.Declare your desires to the universe & it’ll be yours. 

I came across a new post from one my favorite youtubers, Leeor Alexandra. She has been such an inspiration for me on this spirituality journey that I am on.

She created a video about writing letters to her future self. Leeor writes e-mails to her future self & schedules them to be sent a year to date. She uses this as manifestation technique! 

She came up with fun exercise to go along with the letters called, “Life in 2018.”

How freaking dope is that? 

Link to video below!

I decided to partake in this exercise as well. I believe that along with the letter to my future self, “Life in 2018,” would really help set all my desires into motion!

I have a lot of goals that I will accomplish in the upcoming year & I want to share them with you all!

My life in 2018!

 Thailand!♥

I have an insane obsession with elephants. Elephants to me are the most sacred animals that have walked/walk on this Earth. In 2018 I will be taking a trip to Thailand to experience elephants & all of their glory in real life, I CANNOT WAIT! This is going to be the trip of a lifetime!♥

Traveling!♥

Along with traveling to Thailand I will be traveling to several other destinations as well. I will be going to Arizona. For the last 8 years I’ve been dying to go to Arizona lol, why? I don’t know. I am super curious about how life is down there so I will be going! In 2018 I will also be visiting Costa Rica & Switzerland! I have the dire desire to travel to new places, get to know different cultures. I believe traveling enriches your life in so many ways.♥

Social Life!♥

A year ago today I became super anti-social. I stopped associating myself with everyone & created this little bubble for myself. Little by little I’ve been breaking out of that, & I am extremely proud of that! In 2018 I am making new friends & building stronger relationships with the current people in my life! I will share life experiences with them, grow with them, & go on insane adventures with them! ♥

Makeup!♥

Makeup has been a passion of mine since 2014 or so. One of my goals is to teach others how to do their own makeup! I have learned a lot of tips & tricks throughout the years & in 2018 I will continue to share my knowledge with the word! I will film tutorials, share reviews & dupes, & inspire girls & boys to pick up a makeup brush &  feel confident in what their doing!♥

Photos!♥

I used to take & upload so many photos on social media that I’m pretty sure my followers would say, “Damn this bih again?” Lol. I would get dressed up just to take pictures! I was obsessed with taking pictures not just of myself but of all the beautiful things around me. Over the last year I suffered from depression & lost a lot of my self-esteem. I stopped taking photos which is something I loved to do. In 2018 I am taking more photos! I will have the same confidence I used to have & take more selfies! I will be getting dressed up & doing my makeup for no other reason than to just to take pictures! I will be capturing as many beautiful moments as I can!♥

My Relationship!♥

I have been with this handsome little cherub bebe for quite some time now. I am super blessed that God chose him to be MY person! I love him beyond words! In 2018 our relationship will continue to grow stronger. We will travel the world together. & we will be more & more in love as each day passes by!♥

Youtube/Blog!♥

I took a big leap this year with finally starting my blog. This has been a dream of mine for a long time along with starting a Youtube channel. I’ve had Youtube on my goals list since like 2015 & never went through with it. Created an account & never posted content. I struggled with starting my blog & my channel because I felt that so many other people were doing the same & I didn’t want to be doing something that other people were already doing. It wasn’t until I finally acknowledged that those other people weren’t me! No one does things how I do them! The only thing that was stopping me from doing what I love to do was myself! Starting this blog is such a huge accomplishment for me. In 2018 I will let go of my fear of being on camera & officially launch my Youtube channel! In 2018 my blog will continue to grow! My audience will grow! I will continue to put out content that inspires people!♥

Growth!♥

In the past year I’ve come a long way spiritually, emotionally, mentally. I have faced & conquered countless obstacles in my lifetime. I am so proud of the person that I have become. I know there’s still so many more lessons to learn, so many more things I must face, so many more experiences left for me to go through. In 2018 I will continue to strengthen my faith in God, continue to become the best version of myself, & continue on my path of spirituality.♥

Car!♥

I have been very blessed to be on my second car in the past 2 years. Although I love my car, his name is Talon btw lol, I feel like its time for a new one. In 2018 I will be getting my Honda CR-V! White, black interior, HEATED seats, ahh what more could I ask for?  Simple car but perfect for me!♥

I am beyond excited for this new year guys. How awesome is it that 2018 starts on a Monday? New year, new week, new goals! 2018 will be nothing less than amazing, I can feel it in my soul. I am ready to accomplish & exceed my goals! 

I want to challenge you all to partake in, “Life in 2018.” Lets all set our plans in motion, lets all prepare for all of God’s blessings that are coming, lets all tap into the abundance the universe has in store for us!

We’re chasing our dreams all 2018! We’re growing all 2018! We’re practicing self-love & self-care all 2018! We’re spreading love & good vibrations all 2018!♥

I wish you all a very happy, prosperous, & love-filled new year! May this new year bring you everything you’ve ever dreamed of!

Thank you for reading, sending love & good vibrations to you all!♥

Life In 2018! I'm 100% for speaking things into existence.Declare your desires to the universe & it'll be yours. 

[embhm]

Chapter 195: A SURPRISE ATTACK on the STREETS

NOTE: This chapter is dedicated to my canine best friend and running companion Boomer. I’m sure there are lots of beaches to run along on and lots of squirrels to chase in Heaven, I’ll miss you buddy. <Alec>

Also, thank you very much to Miss Sae for translating this chapter, you won’t know the depths of our appreciation for your and the other translators’ work on this novel. Thanks again. <3

As a continued notice, please be advised that the “Addicted: The Novel” blog will always update the chapters earlier than here on Tumblr. Please visit https://addictedthenovel.wordpress.com for up to date postings on the translations. <Alec>

THANK YOU ALEC! For always editing when given the time. I would hug you if I can, but here’s a virtual one ٩꒰ ˘ ³˘꒱۶ⒽⓤⒼ♥♡̷♡̷ <Sae>

NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!!, in the comments or anywhere on this account. We have not finished reading the novel. No copy/paste and all that other shenanigans either. Votes/likes/comments are highly appreciated.

While reading, if available, please read the footnotes at the end of the chapter for clarification.

Translator: Sae                     Editor: Alec

As always, THANK YOU for reading and enjoying the journey with our RAMBUNCTIOUS boys:

GU HAI & BAI LUO YIN

《你丫上瘾了》

Chapter 195: A SURPRISE ATTACK on the STREETS

In the twinkling of an eye, two weeks have peacefully passed by since they have been in Qingdao. During the second week, the two had ended their days in the hotel and moved into a rented apartment for the time being. The reasons being, one to save money and two, to avoid having to go out too frequently. During the day, they would hide in the room together and review their assignments but once night fell, they would head out and take a stroll on the beach. It was in this simple way that their days together were enriched with contentment.

“It looks like someone is knocking on the door.” Bai Luo Yin stretched his head out to look at the doorway.

Giving Bai Luo Yin a glance, Gu Hai immediately stood up to open it.

“Hello, it’s the express delivery company. This is your package. Please sign here.”

Once he saw the shape and heaviness of the item in question, Gu Hai’s face sank; even the color seemed to become slightly ashen. Needless to say, it contained books again. For the last few days, Bai Luo Yin had nothing better to do than to search online for school books. From text books to reference books and even workbooks of various subjects, he purchased nearly 100 already. Every day, when the deliveryman arrived at the usually appointed time, Gu Hai was the one who signed for the package. To make matters worse, nine out of ten times, the books were all bought for Gu Hai himself to read while Bai Luo Yin was only in charge of supervising. Consequently, every time Gu Hai saw the delivery man, he had the urge to kick the bastard out!

“Why did you buy more books huh?” Gu Hai’s face darkened even more than before. “Can’t you buy something else as well?”

“What else is there to buy huh? It’s not like we are lacking anything.”

“What do you mean, we aren’t lacking anything?” Gu Hai fiddled with the cigarette lighter in his hand, “There are no more condoms, why didn’t you think about buying a box of it?”

Bai Luo Yin gritted his teeth, “A box……”

“And sex toys too. I looked online yesterday and there were so many different kinds. There were some really interesting looking ones that we’ve never used before. Why didn’t you pay attention to any of it huh? Those would definitely improve our quality of life. Look at what you’re buying……nothing else but books!! Damn it!” Gu Hai bitterly threw the books in his hand to the ground.

Upon seeing this puerile act, Bai Luo Yin narrowed his sharp eyes towards him, “Pick it up.”

Feeling wronged, Gu Hai pouted his lips and cast an angry look at Bai Luo Yin for approximately three seconds. Then, as if sensing the sudden change in the atmosphere, he slowly bent down to pick up the books without waiting for Bai Luo Yin to start counting down.

Satisfied, Bai Luo Yin faced Gu Hai and asked, “Did you finish reading the book that I gave you two days ago?”

“Yeah, I finished it.”

In just seconds, Bai Luo Yin’s seemingly all-knowing eyes scrutinized Gu Hai, but even then, Gu Hai’s clear conscience persevered.

“Bring it to me. I’ll take a look at it.”

Bearing in mind Bai Luo Yin’s tenacious demand, Gu Hai readily handed the book over to him. Although somewhat suspicious at first, Bai Luo Yin nonetheless flipped through the book in a rather calm and casual manner. True to his word, Gu Hai had indeed finished writing in it.

Not surprisingly, when Gu Hai was first handed the book, the answer sheet had already been confiscated by Ba Luo Yin early on. With that, it was clear that these questions were all answered by Gu Hai. Furthermore, in order to prevent him from contriving any tricks, Bai Luo Yin intentionally examined each situation listed in the book thoroughly. This was to further see if he had foolishly written anything without thinking it through. As a result of the examination, everything looked good.

“How is it? I didn’t lie to you, did I?” Gu Hai reached out to take the book back.

However, Bai Luo Yin suddenly withdrew his hand and gripped hard at the seam of the book. There, he felt that the thickness of the book was slightly strange. As he flipped the book open again and looked at the page numbers, he was immediately enraged.

Motherfucker!

Flipping through the book one page at a time, he noticed that every other page was missing. He flipped again, another page was missing. Needless to say, this rascal must have torn them out!

Noting that Bai Luo Yin’s expression had fallen through and his own deceitful actions had been exposed, Gu Hai hastily fled to the other room. Bai Luo Yin pursued closely behind. It was not hard to tell that he had taken this as a challenge and refused to let it go. After a short while, he was finally able to capture Gu Hai in the bathroom. Without much trouble, he grabbed the mop leaning behind the door and ruthlessly struck Gu Hai. The guilty boy scuttled to all corners of the room while the mop flew down to attack him repeatedly. Ultimately, he ended up at a small corner, struggling to survive in between hits.

“Stop hitting me. Baby, you’re hurting me. Who will serve you later huh?”

“I don’t need you to serve me. I’ll still be able to live well even if it’s just me.”

With much ease, Gu Hai roughly pushed Bai Luo Yin against the wall. This sudden contact caused the huge item, once hanging out silently between his legs, to press up against Bai Luo Yin’s family jewels. Taking advantage of the crude moment, he pruriently rubbed even harder. When he detected Bai Luo Yin struggling, Gu Hai bit hard on his earlobe.

“In other words, you only have me. Who else can satisfy you huh? Even if both your hands were rubbing it until they’re dislocated, it still won’t be able to keep up with half my speed.”

Before any more titillating words gyrated out of his lips, Gu Hai suffered another round of beating!

“Hey, I can hear the phone ringing,” said Gu Hai.

Still not releasing Gu Hai, Bai Luo Yin listened carefully for a moment. It seemed Gu Hai’s cell phone was indeed ringing. Slightly pursing his lips, Bai Luo Yin finally loosened up his grip and let him go before the two made their way out of the bathroom together.

Seeing that it was Gu Yang’s number with just one look, Gu Hai answered the call and casually said ‘Ge.’

“I’ve already arrived in Qingdao. Where are you staying at?”

“Why are……” Gu Hai was flabbergasted, “What did you come to Qingdao for?”

“Your dad sent me here to capture you!”

Gu Hai snorted, “Look at the person he sent. He looked for half a day only to end up sending an accomplice!”

Carefully listening to the small conversation, Bai Luo Yin picked up his own cell phone and browsed through its call history for the last couple of days. After looking through it for a while, he suddenly became aware of something.

“That’s enough, where are you right now? I’ll go look for you.” Gu Hai said indifferently.

“Up to you.”

After hanging up on the call, Gu Hai faced Bai Luo Yin and said, “My dad already knows that we are in Qingdao. He’d even sent my brother here to capture the two of us. Tell me, is he brainless?”

“Do you actually know if Gu Yang is on your side?” Bai Luo Yin asked without restraint.

“What about it?” Gu Hai answered with a question instead, “If he was working with my dad to vent out his anger, why did he help us that time?”

The color on Bai Luo Yin’s face changed at those words, “I’m just urging you to be a bit more cautious.”

“Okay, I know. I’m going to head out.”

Just as Gu Hai left, Bai Luo Yin immediately gave Bai Han Qi a phone call.

“Dad……”

“Son!” Bai Han Qi’s laughter trickled from the other side. His voice was crisp and bright, making it sound as though his mood was pretty good.

“Has Gu Hai’s father gone to our house for the last few days?”

“He hasn’t!” Bai Han Qi let out a light sigh, “I’ve also wondered about this. It’s got me confused too you know. Since the two of you left until now, he hasn’t shown up at all. You mother hasn’t either. Neither of them came here to ask about anything.”

Compared to Bai Han Qi’s relaxed state of mind, Bai Luo Yin’s mind was being ravaged by an unwavering sense of uneasiness that caused his chest to tighten.

“Dad, if it’s convenient, use someone else's ID card and change your phone number. I might have to change my number as well.”

Startled, Bai Han Qi’s breathing became heavier, “Son, what’s wrong? Did something happen over there?”

“No, nothing happened.” Bai Luo Yin quickly consoled him with a few more words, “I’m really good over here. Aren’t I doing this for the purpose of guarding against the unexpected?!”

“There’s no need to worry. If something were to happen, dad will cover for you!”

Those few words bitterly gripped at Bai Luo Yin’s heart.

“Oh, that’s right son! Dad has some good news to tell you. Two days ago, a teacher called here and said that the school has already fixed a recommendation for direct admission into the university for you. This time, there’s no need for you to worry about it anymore. Just relax and have fun over there.”

Bai Luo Yin’s brows rose slightly, “From what I remember, the recommendation needed to pass through two evaluations. I haven’t returned to school since, how did it pass the evaluations so thoroughly?”

“I don’t know either!” Bai Han Qi made a huffing noise, “When you’d just left, I took a trip to the school and asked about it. At that time, the teacher said that if the student doesn’t come, it doesn’t matter if someone else does. But strangely enough, yesterday a call came over to notify us that your evaluations have been approved and complied with their conditions. Afterwards, it was immediately classified as a direct admission into the university. As of yesterday, the file has been submitted.”

Bai Luo Yin became suspicious at the peculiarity of that event.

“Son, in two days, I’m going to chat with the teacher again. You two should come back as soon as possible! Since our ancestors have brought such a brilliant student worthy of Qinghua University, I should arrange a few tables and invite some close relatives and friends over. We should at the least show our faces!”

“Okay, I know dad. Just don’t forget to change your phone number.”

Immediately after hanging up, Bai Luo Yin began to rhythmically tap his fingers on the writing desk as if they were a set of drums. With each successive round of taps, the heavier they struck the table and thus they became louder and more intense. Suddenly, his fingers halted and huge waves of light flickered from what seemed to be the depths of his eyes. Without hesitation, he picked up his phone to call Gu Hai.

“Da Hai, don’t go meet up with your brother. Quickly come back here now!”

Listening to Bai Luo Yin attentively on the other side of the call, Gu Hai was raided with confusion. “Why? I’ve already arrived at the hotel’s entrance.”

“Don’t worry about the reasons. It’s enough if you just return here immediately.”

Thinking that something has happened to Bai Luo Yin, Gu Hai’s mind was immediately smoldered with anxiety. Just as he turned to leave, he suddenly sensed a gust of chilly air rush towards him from behind. He took a large stride to the side, compelling the person that attempted to mount a sneak attack on him to engage.

Gu Hai had the brim of his cap pulled very low and was also wearing a pair of black sunglasses. At first, this person only had some suspicions, but after the quick exchange with Gu Hai a moment ago, he was certain that his target was indeed Gu Hai.

This was a skilled individual. His fighting skills were not in the least bit concealed. After Gu Hai punctiliously hurled several tempestuous fists at him, he realized that this man was completely different from all the other skilled men that he had encountered before. As their fists met each other, Gu Hai quickly noticed that the attacker was not the least bit afraid of hurting himself. Instead, the assailant was refraining himself from hurting Gu Hai, since his goal was to try his best to subdue his quarry!

Sensing the odds of ensuring success were not too high after exchanging a few more punches, the attacker suddenly lowered his head and said a few words. “Huidu Hotel. At the corner of East street.”

Although in full combat mode, Gu Hai was well aware of his surroundings so when he heard those words, he immediately discovered that there was a small instrument hanging loosely from this man’s collar. Composing himself but still not feeling too encouraged about the turn of events, he gave the man a ruthless kick and rushed off. To make matters worse, Gu Hai didn’t know from where those men were going to ambush him from, all he could do was leave it to chance as he made haste and continued westward.

Soon, the two footsteps sounding off from behind him multiplied. Gu Hai knew clearly that the situation was not too optimistic but for now, besides running, there was no other alternative. So as long as there’s an opportunity for him to make it out alive, he would firmly grasp onto it.

A couple of minutes later, Gu Hai scampered into a bustling commercial street. He swiftly maneuvered his way through the throngs of people in the surrounding areas before entering a shopping mall. Then like a mad man, he rushed towards the third floor and charged into the staff lounge. As he swung his head, left and right, looking for a way out, he noticed a window and immediately jumped out of it without much thought. Surprisingly, he landed safely on his feet without hurting himself. This thoughtless jump led him down to the back alley of the shopping mall and distanced him further from the main streets.

Gu Hai stopped to catch his breath. By chance, just scanning his surroundings, he observed a youngster standing to the side.  

“Buddy, help me out. In a moment, wear my clothes and cap and run over there. I’m being chased by a group of debt collectors. Don’t worry. They won’t make it difficult for you once they discovered that you’re not the one they’re looking for.”

The youngster’s face immediately paled as he waved his hands repeatedly to object. “I don’t want to wear it. I don’t want to wear it……”

Without another word, Gu Hai stubbornly gave his clothes to the youngster to put on. Then he took the kid’s hand and shoved it into the pants side pocket where there was a stack of bills inside.

“Help me with this and all that money is yours. If you don’t help me, there’s no use in having it! Consider and handle it yourself!”

This youngster’s face turned purple with pain as Gu Hai’s hand, like a pair of iron pliers, tightly gripped his shoulder. Eventually, under Gu Hai’s attentive gaze, this unlucky individual wore his clothes and bolted north.

“I see him! He’s over there. Follow him!!”

Gu Hai’s nerves tensed. Looking to the side, he saw a car and quickly fled towards the back of it. By chance, there as a beautiful woman crouching on the ground looking for something. Out of options, Gu Hai pulled her up, pushed her against the nearby wall and kissed her!

The group of men majestically passed by Gu Hai from behind.

As the sounds of their footsteps gradually faded, Gu Hai let the woman go. He didn't even know where he had kissed her. It was soft and had a trace of fragrance to it. The woman’s luminous eyes looked on at the face in front of her. It was bright and seemed to be lit with rays of sunshine, handsome and unruly. At first, she wanted to slap him, but she unexpectedly was not able to raise her hand.

Making sure the area was clear, Gu Hai gave her a quick glance and laughed awkwardly. “Sorry. Seeing that you were so beautiful, I couldn’t hold back for a moment.”

For someone that had just met with an event that was quite sudden, the woman’s mental state was exceptionally good. Not only did she not get angry, she even faced Gu Hai and laughed.

This was the first time Gu Hai’s roguish behavior succeeded like this!

At the roof of a high building, a lone sniper stood still with the muzzle of his gun aimed at Gu Hai’s calf. This person couldn’t help but sneer.

He obviously has skills. In spite of everything, he’s still able to stealthily make the best of a bad situation. Fortunately, there’s also a skilled person here, otherwise, this reckless kid would’ve fooled us.

With that in mind, he rapidly pulled the trigger.

Just as Gu Hai was about to leave, he suddenly felt a sharp pain strike his leg. He bit down hard on his teeth while his face distorted into a grim and pale complexion.

What had struck him was not an ordinary bullet. Although it was not lethal to the body, the painful sensation that it produced was just as bad if not worse than a normal bullet. Worse, after the pain slowly subsided, an intense level of numbness will take over and the spot that was struck will instantly lose its sensation. Gu Hai was aware of the numbness that began to creep in the moment he found it difficult to lift his wounded leg. Meanwhile, the group of people that ran the other way were coming back towards him.

Trying to will the numbness away, Gu Hai truly believed that he was now screwed. But, with just a few short sentences from the beautiful woman, he was able to find a way out of this seemingly impossible predicament.

“Why does your complexion look so unsightly? Are you not feeling well? I’m about to head home so I’ll take you to the hospital on my way there!”

“Is this your car?” Gu Hai asked.

The beautiful woman smiled, “What if it is?”

Taking that as the answer, Gu Hai promptly opened the back door and crudely stuffed her in before he sat in the driver’s seat. With haste, he started the car, maneuvered it towards the main road and stepped on the gas pedal, rushing off.

As the group of men rushed ahead, a car swept by them from the side. It was then that they discovered that their target has escaped.

----------------------------

Are you addicted?

The original novel is written by Chai Ji Dan.

We do not own any of its content, we are translators and editors.

[thegloober]

A retirement reflection on the cycle of renewal

Just over a month has elapsed since my retirement from patient care. I’ve been to one grand rounds at my prior medical center, encountering a smattering of old friends, some preceding me to retirement, others in active discussions with their financial advisers and others a mixed multitude of residents and students assigned to the secondary campus that month looking upon us geezers in the small video access conference room with amalgam of awe and envy but no apparent desire to tap our wisdom or experience in any way. They offered coffee that 8 a.m. none of the mostly unhealthy breakfast goodies that I used to seek out from the table when I worked there eight years previously.

My name was no longer on the roster for CME credit, part of the reason for exiting my house that early in the morning, but I signed underneath, leaving a printed name, address, email, and home phone so there would be no ambiguity about who should get that hour’s credit. Pleasantries on arrival, but silent abrupt departure at the conclusion, as the majority of those in the room then had to move along quickly to their daily tasks, mostly clinical.

For the most part, my “medical mind” for the last month has laid fallow. I submitted two essays, one of which I have a contractual obligation to produce and the other for a very good friend who is developing a consulting business which needs a pipeline of science writing. One essay written a few months before appeared in print, so I read it and added the author’s response to the readers’ comments, of which there were quite a few. And I read the table of contents of my two subscription journals though none of the articles in either. Some medical journal summaries come to me passively when I open my daily email or Facebook. I paid much less attention than I would have as an active physician. Agriculturally, though, fields lie fallow for renewal, mandated as far back as the Old Testament where cultivation is suspended every seven years to allow the farmers to rest and focus on returning for the next cycle.

Now the fall months are here. For me personally, September has always afforded me a reset button. Some people use the calendar year as demarcation, others try to coincide with nature where rebirth and replanting come in the spring. Medicine perhaps distorts nature’s cycle of time with residencies or new jobs traditionally having a July 1 start date. This inner clock probably begins with the first third-year student rotation, years of summer vacation beginning with pre-school and concluding with Step 1 and clinical obligations spanning most young American’s lifetimes to that point. For me, though, while my personal semi-annual goals run Jan-June and July-December, my de facto pursuits start around Labor Day. A new school year begins.

While I no longer attend, my wife has enrolled in the state university branch of the Academy of Lifelong Learning, designed for retirees to keep their minds engaged. We can sift through the divided opinion as to whether the Jewish calendar starts a few weeks prior to Passover with the Torah’s specified first month or the more practical demarcation of Rosh Hashanah and a series of designated festivals that comprise much its month. But certainly attendance at most synagogues peaks with the fall Holy Days and tails off to its summer nadir. The World Series climax of baseball gives way to college football with my teams on TV most weekends and the NFL where my team will mostly let me down — until I need pallbearers to let me down one final time.

Medicine has its own autumnal set points. The preclinical years begin. The residents have just enough experience to make them accountable for their decisions. The noon conferences intended for enrichment, suspended for the summer to provide new house staff core lectures partly devoted to critical things they need to know for patient safety and partly to buzzwords that they need in their notes as their introduction to external intrusion that will follow them indefinitely, those noon conferences as daily seminars in clinical medicine presented in rotation by senior faculty who are already familiar with intricate medical disorders become part of the weekday professional obligation that we all have to advance our proficiency. Medical care and medical professionalism return to the established groove, continuing to the next summer, when the classes and faculty again turn over one to another.

And while the cycles of nature are immutable, and the cycles of school, the calendar, sports, and medical training are set mostly culturally, they have a life of their own that has acquired expectation and predictability. Physicians have their cycles too, mostly long but predictable landmarks. We have our acceptance letter, diploma, board certificate, a series of practice settings or jobs, an annual reconciliation with the IRS and the IRA to see how we did and then an exit. But as people like me depart, people like my two children or my many residents extract some legacy from their elders, perpetuate some of what my generation tried to impart, then implement their own renewal as the medical generations turn over one to another. My two offspring visited recently, each at the final stages of training at highly regarded university medical centers that took a lot of time and talent over many generations to excel as institutions. As I chatted with the fellow retirees at grand rounds, I also made sure to introduce a brand new third-year student to several of these physician masters of years past, including some notable achievement of each that becomes part of these students’ professional inheritance.

Whether nature, calendar, or people, there are always starting points, renewals and eventually legacies but never total oblivion.

Richard Plotzker is an endocrinologist who blogs at Consult Maven.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Source: https://bloghyped.com/a-retirement-reflection-on-the-cycle-of-renewal/

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Parkrun - It’s Not a Race

On Saturday 2nd October 2004 in Bushy Park, Richmond, thirteen runners set off on a five kilometre run through the park, organised by parkrun pioneer Paul Sinton-Hewitt. On that day, parkrun was born. From that one location and thirteen runners, parkrun has expanded to 446 locations in ten different countries and over 1,240,000 runners. It is a modern fitness phenomenon.

So how does parkrun work? It’s simple. Once you’ve registered at www.parkrun.org.uk you are given your own barcode which you can print out and take with you to each event (don’t forget it!) When you arrive on Saturday morning (nearly all runs begin at 9am) at your local park, there is a run briefing including information on the course and any safety matters, as well as a mention for any runners reaching key milestones, like their one hundredth run. When you run through the finish funnel five kilometres later you are given a token with another barcode on it. A volunteer with a scanning device will then scan your personal barcode along with the token in order to record your run time. This time is then listed on the results page for that run later in the day for you to check your performance against your previous times. This is all completely free, by the way. Parkrun exists because of excellent support from volunteers, local councils and sponsorship deals with companies who are as passionate about the ethos behind parkrun as the parkrun organisers themselves. If you’ve been thinking of getting involved in the whole ‘Couch to 5k’ programme, then parkrun should prove invaluable. Once you’re confident enough to run with others, you’ll find the positive spirit, support and general sense of fun a powerful contributor to achieving your goal. Don’t forget – you won’t be the only beginner, and you can’t come last because one of the volunteers each week is chosen to be the ‘tail runner.’

It’s not a race. That’s very important to remember. In fact the word ‘race’ is shunned at parkrun, with the more general, less daunting ‘run’ being preferable. You should only be competing against yourself, and only then if you want to. I once referred to the Run Director at one event as the Race Director in my blog on tumlbr, and was very politely corrected. Because that’s the point of parkrun – you just turn up and run with other likeminded folk. There’s no expectation, no cut-off times, no awards for coming first. You tackle that 5k however you like, then you get your barcode scanned and that’s it, time to head home or to a nearby café for a coffee and a post-run chat with your fellow runners.  Runners’ ages range from 4 (under 11s must be accompanied, but can also take part in separate ‘Junior parkrun’ events) to 80+. Finishing times can range from below 15 minutes for elite runners to over 50 minutes for those taking their time, with the bulk of runners finishing around the half hour mark.

Along with corporate sponsorship, volunteers are the lifeblood of parkrun. The number of volunteers varies from week to week and parkrun to parkrun, but the roles include Run Director (responsible for managing the event and giving the pre-run briefing), the route marshals who help ensure runners follow the course correctly and that any hazards are avoided, and the barcode scanners who scan your personal barcode and your finishing token. I volunteered while I was nursing a thigh injury and found it as enjoyable as running (the volunteering, not the injury). In fact many people volunteer having never taken part in the run itself, so it’s clearly as rewarding and addictive. You even receive free t-shirts for volunteering milestones like you do for running.

Maybe there are better things to do on a Saturday morning. Sleeping comes to mind. But for me there is something satisfying, enriching and morale-boosting about running five kilometres with a large group of local, similarly-minded folk, all of whom are there to not only get fit but to socialise and encourage each other. They might all be complete strangers, but it doesn’t matter, they’re there for the same reason as you. It’s a feel-good congregation where you feel part of something unique, something special. While there are benefits to solo running like the ‘me time,’ the ‘getting away from it all,’ and being able to dictate the speed and length of your run, group running also has its perks. It’s believed that running with others leads to improved motivation and performance. It seems we get more out of ourselves while ‘running with the pack.’

The other great thing about the Saturday morning run? Sitting down to a breakfast of coffee and croissants knowing that you’ve already burned off the calories. You’re allowed to feel smug. Of course you are.

In 2011 I was staying with my brother in Hampton, when he recommended that we go along to the parkrun in nearby Bushy Park. It was only five kilometres (just over three miles in old money) so I was fine with that, but I’d never heard of the event before, even though it was already seven years old. He told me I would need to register on the parkrun website and print off a barcode that I would need to have scanned at the end of the race in order to register my time. Ok. But how much did it cost to enter? Nothing as it turned out, which seemed really odd to me at the time. When we got to the start area at Bushy Park, the thing that surprised me most was how many people were there. And more were arriving all the time so that by 9am there were several hundred. This happened every week? I couldn’t believe it. And the numbers haven’t exactly dwindled at Bushy Park since then, despite some runners migrating to nearby events like Richmond Park and Kingston where the numbers are smaller.

I had run Bushy Park and Gunnersbury Park (my local) three times each when in June this year I had the crazy idea of visiting all the Greater London parkruns. I thought it would be a great personal challenge and a way to get out and see the capital and some of the many green spaces (London is 50% green after all). Then I discovered there were 45 of them. Ah. This could take some time then. If I ran a different one every week I should be done by Summer 2017. I set up a twitter account under the guise of ‘Captain Badfoot’ (I do actually have a bad foot, having incurred a chronic sprain in early 2014 which still complains now and then) and randomly selected Walthamstow as the first run.

It was a fairly grey, but mild, morning (actually pretty good conditions for running) as I headed off to the Peter May Sports Centre in Walthamstow on Saturday 11th June. The course is three laps around the playing fields and tennis courts with a slight hill to make it interesting, and a nice view across North London.  I finished in 23rd place out of a field of 91 runners. Not bad. My time was 24 minutes 41 seconds. Again, not bad at all, but I’ve recently got this down to 21 minutes 57 seconds, the 22 minute barrier being something I had been keen to break for some time. The number of parkruns has risen from 45 to 47 since I started, and I’m currently 32 parkruns in, so about two thirds done with my Greater London challenge. So far the highlights have been Alexandra Palace – a fantastic, varied course with an amazing view of the city, Southwark Park – a very friendly parkrun with a flat but interesting course and Beckenham Place Park – partly because this was its inaugural event, and also because it feels like you’re genuinely out in the countryside. As I said, my local parkrun is Gunnersbury Park in Ealing which, ironically, I haven’t visited for over a year. But there’s a reason – I’m saving that for my 50th parkrun. Hopefully my free red Tribesports t-shirt will be in the post soon after. And the final, 47th (provided the number doesn’t rise in the meantime) run? Well I think it would make sense to finish where parkrun began, in Bushy Park. I’m looking forward to it already, but no doubt it’ll be a bittersweet end. Since that first run at Walthamstow I have taken my GoPro camera to each event and filmed each run, with difficulty on some occasions, particularly at Dulwich Park earlier this year when the temperature was -2 degrees and my hands were freezing and almost unresponsive. But it means I can relive each event and research a particular course if I plan on returning. I also write about each one on my tumblr blog in the hope of inspiring others to join in the phenomenon known as ‘parkrun tourism.’ Parkrun is great, but parkrun tourism is better – a different park, route and crowd each week. It makes it harder to get that ever elusive personal best time, but that’s not the point, remember?

Even if you only give parkrun a go once, you’ll be glad you tried it out. It’s free. Just don’t forget your barcode, don’t take the finishing token home with you, and remember . . .  It’s not a race.