#i’m sorry that i return bringing angst but it crossed my mind because im seeing the 20th anniversary in theaters today

[finalgrllfriend]

Thinking about Saw 3D and how at the end Lawrence is the one to close the door on the bathroom.

Do you think for a second after closing it he heard Adam screaming his name?

Did the thought of doing exactly what was done to Adam ever cross his mind as he spat out “Game Over”?

Do you think he could still hear the echos of someone else he doomed to rot there, following him down the hallway?

Do you think, something inside him, something instinctual begged him to turn back?

What if he had an episode, hearing the dead man’s screams? Or better yet, that bathroom and hallway are haunted by the man he left behind?

In his afterlife, do you think Adam still screams? Does he bang on the bathroom door? Run down the hallways? Does he scrape at the tub trying to find his key? Maybe he runs the faucets, or shakes the pipes?

Or does he just sit in his corner and weep?

[iwadori]

Haikyu boys when they make you insecure PT 1 (Kenma,Kuroo)

Part 1 Part 2  Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6.

Word Count:3k 

genre: angst, fluff

masterlist

Kenma:

You and Kenma have been in a long distance relationship for a while.

Both of you stream, Kenma doing it seriously for his job and you just playing it for fun,

Sometimes you stream together of course but because of your difference in audiences and games you don’t do it all the time

“Bye guys! Hope you enjoyed todays stream” You wave off to the camera and shut off your PC taking a few sips of water.

Kenma: Hey.. nice stream today Y/N are you going to watch mine?

Y/N: Of course I will 

Kenma: Ok talk to you later

Y/N: okayy <3

Kenma is what inspired you to stream, he also taught you all the ins and outs of streaming making sure you were set and ready. Your gaming style was very relaxed and friendly as you obviously weren’t streaming as a career just for fun and to make friends with your online viewers. The games you played were usually: minecraft, COD, Sims 4, Roblox, Animal crossing and *Insert your favourite game here* the way I literally named all the games I play 

You wait for Kenmas stream to start, kind of excited as you’ve always loved seeing your boyfriend in his ‘element’ when it comes to playing to games. As your boyfriends stream starts you see he’s already chosen what game he is playing today which is to your surprise Call of duty, since that was the game you were playing earlier.

As he gets into the stream you are entertained, as always since Kenma was being his usual self laughing at his own deadpan jokes and interacting with his viewers. He is currently waiting for his capture the flag game to start so as he waits he decides to read some comments in the chat.

You’re used to the usual ‘Kenma where is Y/N I miss your usual streams together’ or ‘kenma please RAIL me’ which always makes you laugh. You were also used to the common hate comments Kenma and You both got on your streams but you were definitely not ready for this..

@ Ihatewomanandiamadick : Hey Kenma did you see your girls stream today she is so dog shit at COD lmaoooo jhdfkjdrhdrr

“Well hello ihatewomenandiamadick” started Kenma “but yes I did see Y/N stream and obviously she is not the best at games and I would definitely NOT ask her to team with me for any serious gaming competitions ... but she’s fun to watch I guess” as he finished speaking about you his game loaded up so he focused his attention on that the words he just spoke going to the back of his mind as they end up at the forefront of yours.

You obviously knew you were no match for Kenma’s gaming expertise but you didn’t expect him to publicly agree with a hate comment let alone add more of his imput on you. Did he really think that about you? ‘She’s fun to watch I guess’ did he not even enjoy your streams that much?

You wanted to distract yourself, and you definitely couldn’t do that watching him so you close off of his stream and get in your bed deciding to watch your favourite show. 

Waking up at 6pm after your sad nap, you see that Kenma has left some messages to you,

Kenma: hey did you watch my stream?

Kenma: do you want to facetime later and play some minecraft..?

Kenma: y/n r u ok??

Y/N: oh hey cnt play minecraft w you rn not really in the mood..

Kenma: oh ok..

Time passed since then a month to be exact and you basically dropped off of the face of the earth, you weren’t in the mood to do anything let alone game and stream, which was a constant reminder of your boyfriend (something you didn’t want at the time.) 

You felt embarrassed over all the things he said about you and all the things you now think he thinks about you and the way you play. Maybe he thinks even worse things about you, beyond just how you game? What if he doesn’t even genuinely like you...or he has someone else...it does make sense, you do both live miles and miles away from eachother AND he’s a big streamer you see the amount of girls in his comments.

You shake your head to erase your protruding thoughts coming in your mind, but it doesn’t really help. You and Kenma haven’t spoken much over this month he tried to constantly reach out to you at first but you assume he got bored over your constant, repetitive dry texts. So you were almost content with you and Kenma not even being in a relationship anymore.

However on Kenma’s side, he was beyond worried about you. Since you haven’t been streaming or barely responded to his texts he thought something happened to you, but he didn’t want to be seen as ‘overstepping boundaries’ if there was nothing wrong at all with you and you simply were just ‘not in the mood.’ 

So here he is, in Kuroo’s apartment trying to get him to help him out on finding out what is wrong with you.

“So kenma can you remember what happened the day when Y/N went ‘ghost’“ asked Kuroo in a mock detective voice

“Y/N didn’t go ‘ghost’ Kuro, and take this seriously” said Kenma “I’m worried bout her”

“Okay fine, but for real what’s the last thing you remember before she started acting all weird.” 

“Umm I think it was around a month ago I did my saturday stream and I think she was on it but she didn’t leave her usual nice comments throughout”

“Ohh that was the stream when you sai-” Kuroo said before pausing his words as the memory of what Kenma said about you on his stream came in his mind, as even Kuroo thought it was a tad bit harsh for Kenma to say all those things “I think I know why Y/N has been so distant kiddo”

“What why?” Asked Kenma

Kuroo pulls out his phone and brings up the clip off what Kenma said and Kenma’s face cringes ‘did he really say all those things about you’ he thinks. 

“Shit.. I didn’t know I said all of that” he said quietly “how do I make it up to her?”

“There’s only one thing you can really do Kenma” said kuroo

You are woken up out of your sleep by a knock on the door. Getting out your bed like a zombie, you trudge to your front door only surprised by what you see. There in his 5′6 glory stood your ‘boyfriend’ Kenma with a controller and a kitten teddy in his hand. You were very tempted to shut the door in his face and get back to your dreamless sleep but you waited on him to speak.

“Hi Y/N” he said quietly “wanna play some minecraft...?”

“Why so you can ridicule me on how shit I am?” You ask bitterly ready to shut the door on him

“No! No not all” he said stopping you from shutting the door entering your place “Y/N i’m really sorry on what I said, I wasn’t thinking AT ALL... I love watching your streams and I think you’re great at playing games...I was just being a dick,”

You take a deep breath before tears pool in your eyes “what you said really hurt me kenma..” you say “ I know people say shitty things on the internet all the time... it’s the internet. But I wasn’t expecting you to agree with the hater and say even more shitty things on top of that.. I don’t think I want to even stream anymore”

Upon hearing that, Kenma’s mouth parts open with shock ‘you dont want to stream anymore’ were his comments that bad? Now he feel even worse as he should and is now more determined to make things right. 

He impulsively drags your arm into your game room, catching your surprise ‘what is he up too?’ you think. He stops for a second seeing your usual pristine gaming set up, collected up with dust. 

“What are you do-” you start 

“Just wait!” He says, as he rushes away turning on all your stuff and logging onto his twitch account as he sees the views go up he starts to speak

 “Hi guys, its me kodzuken and today I’m here on stream with my beautiful girlfriend and today I want to say..” he turns to you “Y/N im so sorry for the horrible things I said to you that day... I was just being a dick and I’m sorry I really am.”

You look at the chat and you see some confusion and some people recalling his words from last month. “It’s fine Kenma, I forgive you” you say giving him a hug”

“Okay Y/N, so what do you say... wanna beat my ass at bed wars?” He says with a smirk 

“When have I ever loss?” you return his smirk

Of course you did beat his ass as bed wars for rounds on rounds never losing proving yourself to actually be a good gamer girl. You enjoyed your time with Kenma, forgetting what he said before about you and moving on. 

Eventually, you guys moved in together and streamed together all the time and yes you still do play for fun but you’ve gotten way better at COD (some may say better then Kenma) but who is better didn’t matter to any of you, as long as you got to play together that’s all you both cared about.

Kuroo:

Kuroo and you have been together since you were in your first year of high school 

You met as friends first when you got him to tutor you in chemistry ( a subject you still aren’t that good at.)

Now you have your upcoming entrance exams for university in a month so your school has you doing mock exams in preparation for them.

20%

You look down at your chemistry paper that your teacher just handed you. 20%. You’re surprised, very surprised since out of all your subjects (that you go 90+% on) you studied on the chemistry test the hardest ensuring Testurou, that you didn’t need his help at all. But I guess it turns out, you did.

This failing mock grade put a blunder on your day, you didn’t interact with anyone and didn’t want to see your boyfriend so you skipped your usual routine of meeting him on the rooftop and went to the library instead ‘might aswell start early on your studying’ you thought.

As you were going over your chemistry topics, you hear an ‘ahem’ next to you and you turn your head only to find your boyfriend and his friends next to you. Kuroo with his usual goofy smile on his face. 

“Hey kitten where were you at lunch?” he asked 

“Needed to go to the library, Chemistry is kicking my ass” you mumbled 

“Oya” he said as he noticed your chemistry test laying under your textbook “20%, well damn Y/N I knew you were stupid, but I didn’t know you were that stupid” he laughed doing his stupid usual hyena-like laugh.

Ouch well that hurt. You slightly flinched at his words, “Really your name, you didn’t know the molecular formula for ethanol, that’s first year work” he said continuing to laugh “I’m pretty sure that’s one of the first things I tutored you on when we first met” 

His overbearing laughter was not good for you, you were already having a bad day and yes you do know your not that good at chemistry but you didn’t need your chemistry-enthusiast boyfriend to make fun of you for failing. Kenma and Yaku stood there awkwardly obviously aware of how bad Kuroo is making you feel but they didn’t really know how to stop his friend in the moment.Whilst he’s still dying of laughter you decide to pack up your stuff and leave the library.

You managed to get your Chemistry tutor to let you retake your mock paper in a week so that means, extra hard studying with no distractions you definitely can’t fail again. Since studying on your own was definitely not a good option, and you couldn’t go to Kuroo (especially after he ridiculed you) you decided to ask the second smartest person you know to tutor you.

Y/N: Hey Yaku! Can I ask you a favour?

Yaku: Hi Y/N what do you need??

Y/N: I have my chemistry retake next week, and as you know from your loud-loud friend I failed my recent test so can you tutor me?? 

Y/N: Pleaseeee

Yaku: Ok Y/N why can’t you ask Kuroo you know that he’d be more than happy to help

Y/N: Yakuu pleasee just help me out 

So there you was, nearly a week done with your study sessions with Yaku and you’re feeling way more confident than before. 

“Y/N what is the functional group of a Carboxylic Acid” Yaku asked

“umm... COO?” 

“Great! that’s correct Y/N” he praises i dont actually know if it’s correct or not

You then hear a knock at Yaku’s front door and hear his mum let the person in, Kuroo then enters Yaku’s bedroom with shock plastered on his face surprised to see you here.

“Y/N...hey?” he says confused “what are you doing here?”

“Oh Mori-chan is just helping me with chemistry for my retake tommorow” you say nochalantly internally smiling at the twinge in Kuroo’s face at the purposeful use of Yaku’s first name.

“So why didn’t you ask me to help you know I’m a chemistry whiz” he asks

“Maybe I’m too stupid to be taught under your tutelage” you mumble “since I seem to forget whatever you teach me, even when it’s 3 years ago... but ok”

“Y/N I-” he starts 

“Oh save it Kuroo, I have studying to do” you say cutting him off

“But I-” he tries

“So Mori-chan COOH is the function group of ethyl ethonate right?” you ask ignoring your boyfriend who is now at a lost for words

“ummm yeah it is” says yaku who is clearly feeling heavily awkward at the tension in his bedroom.

Kuroo leaves and you and yaku finish off the studying for the night, you did feel a little bad for being a bit mean to Kuroo but it’s karma for him being a dick to you. 

You wake up the next day ready for your exam which was first thing in the morning, before you hand in your phone you see a message from Kuroo,

Kuroo: I know you’re still mad at me, but I think you’re going to do so well on this test. You’re not stupid at all, you’re really smart and I love you < 3 

Kuroo: Good luck Y/N

You don’t respond to the message but smile at the sincerity of it and thankful for the boost of confidence it gave you before you start your exam.

Finishing the exam with a smile, you were confident you did well as everything you and Yaku went over was on the paper and you’re almost certain you atleast got more than 75%. You have to wait an hour before your teacher can give you your results, so in the meantime you might aswell reconcile with Kuroo.

When you exit the classroom, standing there was Kuroo who seemed to have been waiting for you for the whole duration of the exam.

“So how was it?” Kuroo asked, apprenhensive as he assumed you would just ignore him like you did at Yaku’s house.

“It was fine, I think it went alright..” you say

“Kuroo”

“Y/N”

You say simultaneously, he pauses for a second to let you speak “I’m sorry I was being so stand offish when we were at Yaku’s I just wanted you to see I could do it on my own, and when you called me stupid I really took that to heart since you and I both know that Chemistry wasn’t ever my best subject” 

“I’m sorry too, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad, and since it was only a practice test I didn’t think you’d take it to heart but I am sorry I know you aren’t stupid.”

Before you got to say anything else, your Chemistry teacher exited the room with your chemistry paper in hand. Kuroo grabbed your hand anticipating your nerves and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Miss L/N” said your teacher “Well done on your chemistry test” he turned your test around to sure a perfect 100%. Both you and Kuroo gasped, you were elated to say the least you wanted to jump up and down in excitement but a PERFECT 100%.

“I’d also like to add that you have now got the top chemistry score in the school beating the previous title holder Kuroo Testurou” said your teacher, this made Kuroo open his mouth even wider in surprise nearly making you giggle at his response. 

Your teacher took his leave, leaving you and Kuroo in the hallway “ I guess i’m the chemistry whizz now “ you say wiggling your eyebrows just as Kuroo did to you before at Yaku’s this made him chuckle as he came to put his arm around you.

“Y/N don’t get ahead of yourself now, you may have won this battle but I will win the war” he said smiling

In the final exam, you continue your winning streak also getting a near 100% and still beating Kuroo which didn’t matter to either of you, now you’re just like him cracking chemistry puns and jokes all the time which none of your friends appreciated but atleast Kuroo found them SODIUM funny.

AN: Please kill me for the last line of Kuroos, I didn’t really like Kuroo’s since it was a bit self indulgent with my hate for chemistry but what do you guys think?

[lunaastoir]

Hi! I really enjoy your writing so is it alright if i request xiao, diluc, childe with an idol s/o where one of their old stalkers come back or they just recently had a stalker in general but with how busy they were since they’re an idol they don’t even notice? And something bad happens (i cant think of anything</3) Thank you very much !!

hi anon!! a million apologies since this is so late but i hope you like the fic <3

there also aren’t any explicit details for anything bad happening - i briefly touched on subjects that you may not have control over, i hope that’s ok! 

warning (?): struggled a bit on this prompt so i apologize in advance if this isn’t my best work LMAOO

gn! reader

tw: hints of assault, slight angst, very light abuse if you squint

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xiao

now xiao is a very observant man but he's also extremely busy keeping liyue safe

he makes it a point to always come to your shows even if you don't actively see him bc he cares a lot abt you and he enjoys listening to your music ‼️

it's normal for him to sometimes get lost between his own world of demonslaying and the world he shares w you

so one night, he's hanging on the rafters of a house with the perfect view of your singing

everything goes smoothly, he sets his spear down while lightly swaying his head to the music

the concert ends and fans disperse after you say your farewells

a night like this is rare since for once, xiao can walk home w you back to the inn sweet boy really cleared out his schedule for you huh

you're unsurprised when you see him materialize next to you, opting to flash him a smile and a hello

his cheeks are lightly flushed as he crosses his arms before talking quietly about how well you did

he relishes in the wide smile you give him as a result of his praise and he lets the corners of his lips curve upwards slightly

the quiet bustle of the harbor seemed to slow down as the night grew longer

since this was a fairly large concert, you had boxes among boxes of equipment so xiao decided to make your life easier by quickly flying them to their appropriate locations

when he got back however, he was surprised to see you talking animatedly with someone

he didn't think anything was wrong until he saw the person trap you between the stage and words filtered into his ears

your back was painfully pressed against the stage wall as you defiantly met their gaze. after xiao had left, they had immediately come over to you: first introducing themselves as a fan and making amiable conversation, before divulging in personal details of your life that made your skin crawl. you weren’t helpless, you always had your weapon on hand regardless of whether you were performing or not. the way they pushed you against the wall however, made it near impossible to summon your sword should you need it. 

they leered down at you while balancing an arm against the wall next to your head. you had dealt with things like this before so you weren’t overly worried; you could defend yourself. you almost felt pity for the person in front of you as they asked for your number with a sadistic grin, disgusting words tumbling off of their lips. however, that was before you felt their cold fingers idly make their way to your stomach and you felt your breath hitch. oh no

the telltale sound of whooshing alerted you of xiao’s presence, and the press of the tip of his spear against their jugular brought you relief. 

“back away” he tightly growled while his golden eyes narrowed into slits. they stared at him in shock before holding their hands up and moving to step a foot away from you. 

“farther” he motioned with his spear before stepping in front of you as you attempted to collect yourself. 

“ok ok, i’m far away can you put your spear down now?” 

“no.” 

you mentally cursed as you watched the two of them glare at each other. this was supposed to be a carefree night but this unfortunate twist made the air thick with tension. you could feel the anger radiate off of xiao in waves and in an effort to deescalate the situation, you spoke. 

“i’m glad to meet such an...avid fan but i’m sorry the two of us must get going now” you hastily said before attempting to grab xiao’s hand and walk off past them. 

the next words had you halt your steps as they divulged their secret. 

words painted in careless arrogance with hints of violet overconfidence flew out of the person’s mouth - “judging from the weeks i’ve been following you, it didn’t seem like you had a boyfriend”

at the mere mention of prolonged stalking, xiao immediately lunged to pull you behind him. god, he didn’t kill mortals but he swore if he plunged his spear into this human being right here, no one would even blink twice considering how low of a person they were. 

“if i ever see you near them again, i will not hesitate to kill you. i won’t blink twice, i already have blood on my hands.” he ground out.

at the threat, the person grudgingly turned their back to you before leaving the two of you alone in the quiet harbor. 

you carefully reached a hand out to touch your boyfriend’s shoulder, but stopped after you saw the expression on his face. the mix of rage, sadness, and anguish imprinted his features as you watched his chest rapidly rise and fall - a result of his emotional battle. 

“i’m sorry i didn’t notice them before. i should’ve been paying more attention to you” he whispered before silently striding away from your grasp 

you knew that no matter how many reassurances you gave him about how, “it’s not your fault xiao, i didn’t notice them either” he would still blame himself. 

he was supposed to protect you right? so why couldn’t he sense the danger beforehand? what would’ve happened if he wasn’t there?

it’s still a learning process for him to realize that things happen, and he inevitably couldn’t be there to save you from everything. he needs time to understand and adjust. you’re willing to wait, patiently helping him through it. why? because love is worth it. 

god im sorry this ended up kinda sad whoops

diluc 

i swear everytime i say i’m a childe simp diluc kinda wrecks me

ahem anyways onto the hc!

he’s kinda never around but similar to xiao he will overwork himself to clear out an hour or two just to watch your concerts 

he’ll always stand off to the side too so if you tilt your head while you’re singing you can spy his red hair 

you always flash him the sweetest smile and this man blushes like CRAZY before quickly lifting his hand up to give you a thumbs up 

everyone watching the both of you like 😍😦

people think it’s the cutest thing i swear like c’mon the elusive “bachelor of mondstadt” being seen in public supporting you??? wow pls can we share him

he walks with you back to the winery, the entire time linking his hands with yours while gushing about your performance 

1939248/10 it’s literally the sweetest thing 

the next day however, adelinde brings you a pink letter addressed to you 

he doesn’t pry because it’s addressed to you and it’s your business but as the letters start coming by everyday, he starts to grow curious 

one day he straight up just asks you about it

“hey, you know those pink letters you keep getting? who are they from?”

you laugh slightly at his bashfulness and respond with a “just some overexcited fan” and he smiles before kissing your forehead 

he loves that people are noticing your talent 

loves it! until you get stalked by the same person who wrote you those letters while you were shopping!

diluc knows something’s wrong when you rush into angel’s share panicked after not returning his usual smile. 

“darling? are you ok?” he asks worriedly before quickly setting down the glass he was cleaning to move towards you. 

the widening of your eyes as you looked behind you at the sounds of someone else entering was all he needed to swiftly step in front of you, blocking their gaze of your face. 

the slightly panicked look in your eyes before you hurriedly whispered, “they’re following me” made diluc glance at them subtly out of the corner of his eye. he watched as they walked over to find a seat next to the bar, seemingly ready to order a drink. he quietly asked if you would like to sit in the room reserved for the employees, away from their prying eyes. your hasty nod was all the confirmation he needed for him to let you access the door behind him. 

the night went by fairly smoothly with kaeya’s usual teasing and venti’s usual begging for alcohol. diluc’s eyes narrowed however, when the person seemed to ask him questions regarding you. things like, “i heard you’re dating y/n... they’re amazing, how long have you been together?” and “do they live with you at dawn winery?” diluc answered these questions as short as he could, trying to convey with his body language that he truly did not want to talk to them. 

everything was going well until he made the mistake of leaving the bar unattended. he had briefly forgotten about your residence in the room behind him as his mind immediately gravitated to breaking up a brawl. when he returned, the half drunk glass of liquor combined with the person’s absence from their seat, caused sparks of worry to light up inside his chest. 

turning to the door, he knocked once. 

“is everything alright in there love?”

the sounds of things rustling about and the occasional muffled voice had him opening the door quickly. he saw you with your arm being held tightly in their grasp, your mouth muffled with their hand, while you strained against them by pulling at your arm. 

diluc immediately made his way over to you, quickly pulling your arm away before letting you enter into his embrace. 

“get out.” the venomous words clawed their way out of his throat as he looked at them with eyes that screamed hatred. his blood was boiling as his mind replayed the scene; your scared expression and their greedy eyes. 

diluc didn’t need to repeat himself twice as they ran out, trying not to trip over crates of wine. he made a mental note to find out who they were in order to make sure they never came near you ever again. 

he quickly looked down at your form, relaxing slightly at the sight of your tentative smile. “my knight in shining armor” you joked before softly nuzzling your head into his shoulder. the anger had yet to dissipate from his veins, and although he knew you were still shaken up, he was sure you would be fine. 

a pink letter placed on the table next to you caught his eye, and he made sure to quickly pocket it as he led you out, gently jesting with you about the “unnecessary amount of wine barrels in here, diluc this is a safety hazard!” 

he would deal with this person later. 

childe

ayo AYO ITS THE TOY SALESMAN

ok tbh he’s very rarely around so he unfortunately cannot make it to all of your shows 

dw tho, he will try his hardest to be there for the ones he’s in town for bc what is he if not your number one hype king??? 

ok kinda creepy! alert 

he’s tasked two of his subordinates to keep watch over you whenever he’s out of the harbor

it’s not anything creepy,,, he just gets extremely worried abt you and wants to make sure you’re safe 

sO when he gets a ransom note??? he’s understandably confused but also very much freaked out 

bc did they not know who he was??? the fact that they thought they could get away with holding you captive was quite honestly kind of funny to him 

very stressed and angry tho - hides it behind a facade of smiles but he’s raging 

takes him only a few hours to track you down bc he had everyone and i mean EVERYONE looking for you 

the note crunched in his hand as the harbinger made his way towards windrise. his pace was erratic, long legs rushing towards the small cave his agents had found. they were bordering the perimeter of the enclosure, careful to not alert you or your captor of their presence. childe’s subordinate head had calmly stated that childe need not come out to rescue you, the situation was under control and they could do it for him. however, childe’s sharp gaze along with his sickly sweet words of “thanks but no. i’m coming out to see this sorry asshole for myself” had the agent backing away apologizing. he wanted to see the look on this person’s face before he shoved their sorry ass into the abyss himself. 

as he reached the opening of the cave, he glanced over his shoulder at his head agent; a silent warning to keep the area sealed. his blue eyes glinted with a thirst for blood before making his way into the cave, sealing off the exit with his body. 

“well well, playing games with the love of my life are we?” 

his teasing words reached your ears as your eyes immediately found the face of your boyfriend. you weren’t horribly scared, just a little shaken up and sore from the bindings on your wrists. relief coursed through your body at the sight of him. you needn’t put in your plan of getting out of these bindings to fight your captor yourself anymore. 

childe’s eyes quickly scanned over your frame, making sure you weren’t hurt. at the state of you completely unharmed, the harbinger let his heart calm down slightly. you were completely ok. 

“wait a little longer, love? i promise this will be over soon”

the wink he sent you had you lightly rolling your eyes at his antics before he directed his attention back to your kidnapper. if your captor wasn’t scared before, they were certainly shaking in their boots now at the sight of childe’s twin hydro blades rotating playfully in his hands. 

“listen, all i want is the money-”

“and all i want is your head” 

your boyfriend smiled after cutting them off. the severity of the situation truly seemed to sink in at that moment before pleas of mercy fell from your captor’s lips, desperate to escape the bloodthirsty gaze of the harbinger. childe’s eyes flickered over to yours where you sat there, with your head ferociously shaking. a silent “no.” he sighed before swiftly bringing his arm up to hit your captor on the head, effectively knocking them out cold. 

his hands worked at the ropes holding you and he gingerly rubbed at your bruised wrists. you silently thanked the archons he could never say no to you. archons forbid what would've happened if you hadn’t said anything. while you were explaining what happened, the young man quickly scooped you up in his arms before walking out of the cave. 

you playfully hit his shoulder while muttering “drama queen” but you stopped when you saw his face morph into an expression of seriousness. you had informed him on the situation about your captor revealing themselves to be a recent stalker of yours, completely oblivious to the look of frustration on his face as he freed you from your bondages. 

“i was scared you know.” he quietly divulged. “i knew that it wasn’t anything extremely serious but i... i was still scared”

you swore as you looked at him in that moment, he had turned ten again. the youth of his face betraying his vulnerability. 

you quietly hummed before tangling your fingers in his hair. “i hope you know it wasn’t your fault. it wasn’t anyone’s fault. not even the two fatui agents who you sent to stalk me while you were away.”

he quietly laughed at that before mentally filing away a reminder for a lecture to those two agents in the near future. 

“i’m just glad you’re safe. i know you can save yourself but i’ll always be here. i still wish you would let me take care of your asshole kidnapper myself though.” he pouted jokingly. 

“i’m sure the millelith will lock them up for a long time.” you laughed sweetly. 

his usual smile reappeared at your antics. maybe he didn’t get to beat your captor up and do...much worse. however at the end of the day, your smile was still intact regardless of what happened. that’s all he wanted. 

[skipps-writes-for-gojo-satoru]

hello! i was wondering if you write angst? if so, could you please write headcanons about gojo visiting his s/o (i use she/her pronouns) during their anniversary??

A Promise.

Gojo Satoru x fem!Reader

Im sorry I kinda made it a oneshot because 147 fked me up bad and this is the fruit of it 😭

Note: italics mean flashbacks, read very carefully 🔍

The sound of an alarm goes off.

"Good morning, (Y/N)!"

"Good morning, Toru～"

A surprised giggle leaves your lips as Gojo suddenly flips you over and peppers multiple kisses to your face. You tried to push away his face with your hands, your hands placed on his warm cheeks as your giggles turn into laughter. "Satoru, s-stop it tickles!" You say in between your laughter which promotes a grin from Gojo who finally pulls away to look at your smiling face, your once closed eyes fluttering opening to reveal orbs full of life and love staring back at him. The alarm in the background ringing in the background.

The sound of an alarm goes off.

Gojo slowly blinks as his bleary vision clearing the more he regains consciousness. He reaches over to grab his phone by the nightstand and turns it off then carelessly tosses his phone onto his bed. He slowly sits up, his ashen bangs covering his dull eyes. When was the last time he cut his hair? He doesn't remember, with a sigh he pushes his bangs back and stands up to get ready for the day. Only silence filling the room.

"You can't have cupcakes for breakfast! " You say as you quickly swipe the cupcake from Gojo's hand. "Aww but it's the same thing as pancakes!" He whines out as you're both standing in the kitchen dressed in your work attire, Gojo's blindfold resting by his neck. "No, they're different! We don't have much time left because someone decided to play instead of getting ready for work." You huff as you cross your arms, a light blush dusting your cheeks. "I can't help it, you're just too adorable! How could I resist?" Gojo says while wrapping his arms around your waist your head resting against his chest, you couldn't help the smile forming upon your lips. "Fine, one cupcake only!"

Once in the kitchen, Gojo reaches into the refrigerator and grabs a cupcake from the box- he purchased yesterday. Taking a bite out of it before throwing it into the trashcan. Slipping his sunglasses over his eyes, taking one last look at his apartment before closing the front door behind him.

"Oh wow, Satoru look!" You excitedly yell out as you gesture for him to look outside the car window. Gojo momentary pauses before taking a look outside. Where cherry blossoms trees lined the road and it's petals fluttering all around. "You speak as if you've never seen a cherry blossom tree." Gojo nonchalantly says before you grab his arm forcing him to look at you. "No matter how many times I see them I still think they're beautiful!" Ijichi quietly tries to cover his laughter as he stares at you both from the rear view mirror.

Gojo doesn't bother to look at the trees, his eyes were straight on the road with one hand on the steering wheel. His car slowing down as he approaches a red light, his eyes momentarily flicker to the bouquet of flowers resting on the passenger seat.

As the car slows down and pulls to a stop, you both get out of the car. Taking in the sight of Jujutsu High, taking your hand Gojo pulls you along the archway so that you would both be walking side by side.

Gojo parks his car by the sidewalk, turning off the ignition he couldn't help but rub his temples. Grabbing the bouquet he gets off the car closing the door as the signal of the car locking rings momentarily.

"Mrs. Gojo, the higher up have an assignment for you." You pause your writing as you take in the words Ijichi says as he stands by your office doorway. You let a long sigh, putting your pen down before stretching in your seat. "What rank?" You ask as you stand up to move towards the direction of the door. "Presumably A rank."

The wind passes as Gojo climbs a set of concrete steps, his ashen hair gracefully dancing along with the wind. The grip on the bouquet tightens, as he takes each step closer to his destination. The soles of his shoes crushing the fallen cherry blossoms that lie.

"(Y/N)!"

Gojo immediately spots your figure walking across the courtyard. The first years halt in their training as the sound of their teacher echos. Not even a second passes as Gojo appears in front of you with a frown on his face. "Mission?" He casually asks before you nod towards him apologetically. "I'm not sure how long it'll take but I promise to return as soon as I can!" You enthusiastically takes his hands in yours, the matching rings you both wear shining momentarily as the clouds pass. "And?" Gojo raises an eyebrow as his frown deepens not quite satisfied with your answer, his grip on your hands tightening. "And I'll promise to take lots of pictures and videos and call you when I can. Oh and souvenirs!" You smile brightly towards him causing him to return your smile. "Very well, you have permission to leave." He says playfully before bringing you into an embrace and pecking your lips.

"Promise to come back safely to me okay?"

"I promise!"

"You're such a liar (Y/N)..."

Gojo whispers as he places the beautiful bouquet on your tombstone. The elegant engraving of your name etched onto the stone, a reminder that you were no longer in this world. Those were the last words you ever spoke to him before you left. He could vividly remember the figure of you walking away from him, each step you take moving further and further away from him in every nightmare he sees. Waking up only to be drenched in swest as he yells out your name, wishing if only he had the power to stop you from ever leaving. None of this would of happened and your name would not be etched onto this stone, this was not the kind of anniversary he wanted to spend. Gojo stands back up and puts his hands into his pockets, blankly staring the arrangement of flowers. He wonders if you like them. He remembered the way your eyes always sparkled when he surprised you with a bouquet. Oh how sweet your voice was whenever you called out his name. In moments of happiness, sadness, confusion, excitement and fear.

"Did you call out my name?" You were struggling to breathe as blood seamlessly flowed out of you. Trying to drag your already broken body as the ceiling around you started to collapse while your mind flickered in out of consciousness. Gritting your teeth as hard as you could to keep moving. Chanting his name as a mantra "Satoru, S-Satoru, Saー!"

"Did you t-think of me?" Your body finally gives up on you as you lied on the shattered ground. Even then with the excruciating pain from the boulders that fell onto your broken arms, you still tried to drag yourself forward. "I-I need to get back t-to him...." The blood stained ring on your finger, a reminder of where you must return to. You needed to see him, your mind filled with memories of him, of his smiling face, his beautiful blue eyes.

"I p-promised...!"

Your nails bloodied as you heaved pushing your heavy body, before your arms could no longer move under the weight of the rock. A haze of red clouded your vision as tears endlessly spilled from your eyes, with your broken voice screaming out his name over and over again. Before the falling debris silenced your screams. There was not a single moment you didn't call out for him or think of him even in your final moments. He was and will always be your everything.

Gojo was kneeling by your grave, his sunglasses shattered-as tears endlessly flowed out of his eyes. "(Y/N), (Y/N), (Y-Y/N), please c-come back to me...!"

However, only silence greeted him.

Taglist: @the-fandoms-georgie @crapimahuman @annie-acadia @iwanttobefuckedbysatorugojo @herrscherr @spicyyren @asmaeackerman1 @clearlynotellie @your-waifuuuuu @dokiwoki @armiihhh

[bnhatrashsammy]

You Think They’re Gonna Hit You

Includes: Izuku, Bakugou, Todoroki and my lovely Mina baby!

Warnings: ANGST but with a happy ending bc im baby, nothing too detailed though. Gender neutral reader <3

Mentions of abuse and cursing ofc (its me i always curse so like-)

_____________________________________________________

  You had been in an abusive situation/relationship prior to your current relationship. You had yet to tell your partner.

You two were simply playing around, something very common in your relationship.

You were in his dorm, both of you going back and forth between tickling each other.

Your eyes were closed as you blindly search for his sides, your breath coming out in shrieks and gasps between you laughing so hard.

One you feel your lovely boo move so they’re hovering above you, rather than beside you and tickling the shit out of you, you open your eyes as you try to catch your breath.

However, once you see their position your breath gets caught in your throat, and your entire body freezes up.

They weren’t even in a very threatening pose, their face held a bright and playful grin. Yet, all you could focus on was the hand positioned like it was going to slap you. 

  It was practically coming for you in slow motion, you thought for sure your lovely partner was getting ready to slap you.

  Without even thinking, you automatically flinch, hands coming up to protect your face, your body trembling in fear.

Izuku Midoriya

Izuku’s face changes from playful to concern very quickly, not that you can see from your tightly closed eyes and arms covering your face.

“Baby?” Izuku says softly, leaning back so he’s sitting cross-legged in front of your form. “(Y/N), baby, look at me please.” The utter concern and fear in his voice had you peaking your eyes open, looking between your fingers at the teary-eyed look he’s giving you.

Your body reacts before your mind really catches up to what the fuck just happened, and you sit up, crossing your legs as well and fiddle with your hands in your lap, looking anywhere but at Izuku’s gaze.

‘He’s gonna be so mad- he’s gonna yell and scream- I shouldn’t have reacted- if only I had just-’ Before you can even finish your rambling, terrifying thoughts, Izuku speaks up.

“D-did you think I was gonna hit you?” His voice comes out slowly and softly, but there’s not a hint of judgment. Only concern.

You slowly meet his gaze, continuing to fiddle with your hands. “N-not really you- It’s just what I’m used to so I just assumed-” You hurriedly try to explain before he speaks up again.

“Baby, you’re used to? How could you be used to- who did it? I’ll kill them, I swear!” Izuku leans forward slowly, as to not startle you anymore before pulling you to him, hugging you comfortingly, protectively. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, (Y/N). I promise. If I had known I wouldn't have done it. I'm so sorry baby.” Izuku reassures you genuinely.

Izuku continues reassuring you, comforting you and caring for you softly as you tell him about your past. Obviously you couldn’t spill everything out all at once, there would be more of these conversations in the future. But it was honestly nice. To just be able to get it out in the open, to have him comfort you.

“I will never hurt you, (Y/N). Let me be your hero.” Izuku says after you had cried out all your tears and fell asleep on him. He places a gentle kiss on your forehead, before laying down with you and falling asleep himself.

Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou freezes as the genuine fear he can clearly see on your trembling form. He’s quick to sit against his wall on the bed, pulling you into his lap as he comfortingly pets your hair.

You bury your head in the crook of his neck, a flurry of painful memories causing tears to build up in your tightly closed eyes as you grip onto Bakugou as if your life absolutely depended on it.

“I-i’m sorry- I didn’t mean too-” You try apologizing, but he’s quick to shush you, his voice gruff but gentle in his own Bakugou way.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, dumbass. Jus’ breathe.” Of course, Bakugou doesn’t blame you, but he also feels you thought he was going to hit you simply because of how angry he can be, he didn’t know of your past of abuse.

“I know i'm always angry and shit, but- fuck-,” His voice breaks, and he holds you the slightest bit tighter, more protectively. “I’d n-never hit you, (Y/N).” He tries to keep his voice steady but it breaks again as tears well up in his eyes. “I love you so much, I’d never do anything to hurt you, okay, baby? I swear it- fuck.” 

You continue to grip onto him desperately, opening your mouth to speak even though you know your voice is gonna be hoarse from your crying, “I k-know you would’t- it just made me think about when it did happen and I-I just reacted. I k-know you’d never, Katsu- I’m s-”

“No. Don’t be sorry. Just talk to me. Please?” He says sternly, but giving you the option object, to just stay within his arms protectively.

So you tell him some of the things you had to endure. He drops the name ‘dumbass’, giving you soft nicknames and encouragement to continue when you started crying too much to continue talking.

Aside from his encouragements, and hushing of your apologies, he just let’s you speak what's on your mind. It’s freeing, and honestly you feel a lot better when it’s over.

“Thank you, Katsu. I love you. So very much.” You whisper tiredly as you finish your hours long conversation. Bakugou shakes his head as he continues rocking you comfortingly.

“I'm here for you through whatever, babe. And I plan to keep it that fuckin’ way.” He says, the determination in his voice caused a small smile on your face.

You eventually fall asleep, Bakugou humming gently as he continues rocking you comfortingly. Honestly, you couldn’t be happier in that moment, with the love of your life caring for you with no restraints.

Todoroki Shoto

  Todoroki’s face instantly drops as he watches your reaction. He knows that reaction. He’s had that reaction too many times to count. 

He lays beside you, cuddling into your side, rubbing circles over your sides in a comforting manor as your breathing eventually returns to normal. 

“I’m sorry, (Y/N).” His voice sounds so remorseful, so genuinely hurt.

“It's not you- It’s just muscle memory- I know you’d never actually do anything to hurt me Sho.” Your voice comes out quickly, you turn over to hide into his chest as he rests his head against yours. He moves his hand so it’s rubbing your back soothingly.

“Talk to me?” Todoroki asks, and it makes your heart swell. He’s not the most emotional person, you loved him regardless of that fact obviously, but the fact that he’s offering to listen without you bringing it up first makes you a bit happier.

So you talk, telling him about different situations throughout your life that inevitably lead to the muscle memory reaction. Todoroki didn’t talk, preferring to just listen. He’d switch between rubbing your back, or running his hands through your hair, occasionally kissing along your hairline or kissing your cheeks softly as you vented.

Once you finish talking, genuinely too mentally and physically exhausted to continue, Todoroki speaks up.

“None of that was your fault. Those people- they were at fault. You had never done anything wrong, (Y/N). Thank you for telling me. Thank you for trusting me enough to talk about this. You’re so strong and brave. I'm so proud to call you mine. I love you, (Y/N). Thank you for allowing me to help.” He ends his mini speech by placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

You smile at him tiredly, before pulling the blanket from the end of the bed bed and covering you both with it. You snuggle into his chest, leaning your head up to place a kiss on his jaw, before allowing sleep to take you.

Mina Ashido

Mina pauses at your reaction, confusion taking over her features before the realization slowly comes to her.

“Babycakes, no, i’d never-” She says quickly, jumping to straddle your lap, wrapping her arms around you reassuringly as your thoughts turn dark.

“It’s okay, cupcake, I’m here for you, jus breath, I've got you.” She reassures as your wrap your arms around her, cries slowly leaving your throat while she nuzzles the crook of your neck.

Before you can even open your mouth in an attempt to apologize she starts talking, “Don't you dare apologize. It’s not your fault, love.”

You can’t help the chuckle that interrupts your sobs, she knows you through and through.

“You want to talk about it, babycakes? I’ll listen. Let me be here for you please,” She pleads, just wanting to calm your painful sobs, just wanting to put a smile back on your perfect face. Her own eyes start to tear up, and she sniffles quietly.

You hug her a bit tighter, nodding your head. Once your tears calm down a bit, you tell her. You relay some of the events of the past that have scarred you to this day.

And with everything you say Mina continues to reassure you, kissing all over your face and hair. She continues holding you, not letting up for even a second. It means the world to you, just the fact that she’s being serious about it for you. She’s genuinely trying for you, and it makes a small smile light up your face as you finish retelling your past.

“There’s that gorgeous smile I love to see!” She says, a bright grin lighting up her face which just causes you to smile more.

“What would I do without you, Mina.” You say lovingly, as she wipes your eyes for hopefully the last time of the night.

Her smile turns loving as she gives you a small, gentle kiss.

“Let’s not find out, babycakes. You’re just gonna have to be stuck with me.”

Well, you couldn’t complain with her on that note.

[bumbleklee]

Could you make a fic based on the song Moondust By Jaymes Young? With Xiao or Zhongli? It’s fine if you decline, I enjoyed your Lonestar fic a lot! Also, thank you in advance if you do this! ^^

after this, i decided im a monster. this is so sad, like so so sad. i don't know if this is what you had in mind but since the song is basically about learning how to live/love without someone, i went down a death route. i also went w xiao. pls enjoy (and grab a tissue)

before reading: ANGST!!! you literally die and are a ghost the entire time. mentions of injury and blood as well as self-harm and suicidal thoughts. word count is around 2.1k (under cut for length)

I'm building this house, on the moon Like a lost, astronaut Lookin' at you, like a star From a place, the world forgot And there's nothing, that I can do Except bury my love for you

Death was quick.

You know instantly that you’re dead the second you open your eyes. You can still remember the feeling of the Fatui pyro agent slicing his knife across your throat and if you think about it enough, your neck tingles. You remember falling to your knees, being laughed at, and then you saw nothing.

Well, you saw blackness.

And then when you came to, you were standing in the middle of Liyue Harbor. The world seemed duller but it was real. No one paid any mind to you, so you assumed you were a ghost.

It’s nice to still be able to watch the sun rise high above your hometown.

There’s no panic, no rush to find out what’s going on, you don’t need to. Your hands travel to your throat and the horrific wound is gone. In fact, all of the scrapes and bruises and imperfections on your body were gone. Death brings solace, you humor.

Your peaceful moment was interrupted by two frantic voices. They catch the attention of everyone in the area, including you, and you spin around quickly.

Xiao.

“Break the contract, please, Zhongli-” His voice is frazzled, filled with a sadness the living can’t understand. “I can’t live without them.”

You looked down at your left hand, heart shattering at the absence of the jade ring. Right. You were going to marry Xiao later that year. Not anymore.

A hundred thousand memories of sweet kisses and long nights flooded into your mind. They caused you to hold your breath, too many emotions crashing through your tired form. You felt like crying but couldn’t (ghosts didn’t have tears, you guessed).

You’re standing right in front of the love of your life and he can’t see you.

Maybe it’s a good thing he can’t see you because Xiao already looked wrecked. His eyes were puffy and red and his hair was disheveled. Unhealed scratches wound his arms like ribbon. You had been with Xiao for years, through the good and the bad, and never once had you ever seen him in this state.

He’s pleading still and Zhongli has an indescribable expression on his face. “I can’t,” His voice is barely a whisper, “You know I can’t.”

Xiao wails, falling to his knees. Zhongli feels his pain, you know he does, yet he won’t put him out of misery. You watch as Zhongli bends down and lifts the adeptus into his arms, swiftly walking away from the crowd. You follow ensuite and Xiao’s eyes are hazy, staring through you over Zhongli’s shoulder.

“I’m right here.”

But he doesn’t hear you.

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

You begin to follow Xiao around. Not that he goes anywhere, too heartbroken to move, but you keep watch of him like he once did for you.

He resorts to staying in Zhongli’s apartment. The consultant isn’t around most of the day and Xiao rarely leaves his bed. His tears stain the satin pillowcase and he curls upon himself. Sometimes you stand in the doorway and stare, other times you muster up enough courage to go and sit on the unoccupied side of the bed.

The first time you touch Xiao again is at night. He’s crying and without thinking, you wrap your body around his. His chest is pressed against yours and you press your lips to his shoulder.

It’s not warm anymore. In fact, it feels like nothing.

But still, you hold Xiao until he’s asleep. You don’t let go all night, opting to watch your beloved finally get some rest. You wonder if this is how it’s going to be for the rest of eternity? Would you follow Xiao around aimlessly for centuries more?

Or maybe you’re just stuck here. You recall a saying from an elder in Liyue years ago, “Spirits with unfinished business can’t move.”

You decided then that you were going to help him move on, help Xiao bury his love for you.

Nothing can breath, in the space Colder than, the darkest sea I have dreams about the days, driving through your sunset breeze But the first thing, that I will do Is bury my love for you

There’s no book about being a ghost. You have to figure it out on your own and you’ve never been more grateful no one can see you go straight through the wall for the third time that hour. Over time, you create your own handbook in your mind, jotting down anything you discover as your time as a dead person entails.

Within the first week, you understand that no one can see you, hear you, or feel you. And while you can vaguely touch objects and people, the sensation is different than when you were alive. Every human trait was thrown out the window - you don’t need to sleep, breathe or eat and drink anything.

You attend your funeral exactly a week after your body was discovered and someone propped your sword against your casket. You try to grasp it, to pick it up, but you only manage to push it over with a gust of nonexistent wind. It clambers to the floor, the funeral parlor growing silent, and you take this as your cue to leave.

You wondered if Xiao, or anyone of that matter, could sense you at least. Even if Xiao couldn’t see you, just him knowing you were there would ascend you to the afterlife (right?).

You also find out you can’t leave Liyue. There’s an invisible border keeping you trapped in the country and, frankly, you don’t mind. Xiao won’t leave Liyue so you don’t need to leave Liyue. But sometimes you get anxious that one day Xiao will leave Liyue and never return. And if you haven’t accomplished your goal yet, would you truly be stuck as a monster among men?

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

On particularly good days, Xiao talks to you. Zhongli was gone early one morning and Xiao pulled himself out of bed and to the living room, opting to open the blinds and see sunlight for the first time in weeks.

You sit on the coffee table with your legs criss-crossed as Xiao mumbles desolate words.

“I keep just wishing I would wake up dead. I miss you so much.”

You frown. “I’m here, I’m right here.”

But he can’t hear you. “You aren’t here to make me laugh at your stupid jokes anymore. And I just...I should have been there! I should have-”

His voice cracks and you move off the coffee table, wrapping your arms around his quivering body. You try to press yourself against him, squeeze your arms so tight that he’ll feel you, but you can’t. You can’t kiss his chapped lips and move your bodies so he’s curled into the crook of your neck.

Sometimes, you watch Xiao hurt himself. He digs his nails into his arms or thighs until he draws blood, only to push it all away and scream into the ground. You want to snap him out of him, tell him to stop doing that to himself, but you can only sit and stare.

You were nothing to Liyue - a common human who added nothing of importance to society. Yes, your death was sad for many people but the world kept turning. Xiao, on the other hand, was so special. He was the Vigilant Yaksha - the people of Liyue needed him forever.

“I miss you. I love you. I miss you.”

I'm a cast away, and men reap what they sow And I say what I know, to be true Yeah I'm living far away, on the face of the moon I've buried my love to give the world to you

Xiao goes out sometimes. It’s either to patrol the city or on a walk with Zhongli. It’s not much but it's an improvement. Like always, you follow him.

He’s started to have nightmares, waking up in a rush. He used to comfort you when you had nightmares and it pains you that you can’t return the favor. You try, by God, you try. You run your hands down his back comfortingly but Xiao only cries harder.

When Xiao sees Ganyu for the first time in months and she gives him homemade almond tofu, he smiles. It’s small and quick but you see it.

Growing up, you had thought that the living mourned the dead. When your grandmother died, you felt broken for a while, but that pain was minimal compared to this. Having to live endless days as an invisible soul while the living grieved was unbearable.

When no one is around, Xiao breaks down. He hurts himself, insults himself and wishes for you endlessly. When Xiao tries to jump off the roof of the apartment complex in the middle of the night and survives with only an injured arm, you realize he’s pushing his body. He’s trying to kill himself.

So, you scream.

Every waking hour of the day you scream.

“I’m right here, Xiao! I love you and I’m right here! I’m sorry for being careless and getting killed but you aren’t ready to join me yet!”

You know he doesn’t hear you, he can’t hear you, and yet Xiao slowly stops hurting himself.

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

It takes a year for Xiao to finally begin to cope with your death and you know your journey will be coming to end soon.

He still talks to you except now it’s hopeful and filled with acceptance. On the anniversary of your death, he travels to the Dragon-Queller early in the morning. He sits down in the spot he used to take you to and rubs the grass softly, as if motioning for you to sit down next to him.

You do.

“I’m leaving Liyue next week.”

A million feelings run through your veins. You want to throw up, scream, cry. Is a week enough time to get Xiao to move on from you? Had he already moved on? There were too many questions you couldn’t fucking ask.

You can’t bear to listen to the rest. Your feet travel on their own, taking you far away from Xiao and back into the heart of Liyue Harbor. You didn’t know where you were until you heard a voice call out for you.

“Hey, you!”

You were imagining voices now. You felt sick to your stomach.

“Y/N!”

A short, young woman came into your view and you finally looked up. You had walked right into the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Hu Tao was staring at you, not through you.

“I knew you were still here.”

Hu Tao could see you.

It didn’t make sense but you didn’t have time to make it make sense. Without thinking, you cried out to Hu Tao and begged her to help you save Xiao, save yourself.

“I want to go with him,” You say.

“But you can’t.”

“Then he’s going to forget about me.”

Hu Tao chuckled softly, “You think Xiao would forget about you?”

You don’t answer. Maybe it was you that didn’t want to forget about Xiao. Either way, it hurts. “He’s going to fall in love with someone new and-”

“Isn’t that what you want?”

It was. You wanted Xiao to be happy without you, to learn to love again. You wanted him to bury his love for you so you could both be free.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Hu Tao says, “Xiao will find you again one day.”

She clasps her hands together and reaches them out to you. You look down and see a moving image of Xiao. He’s still talking softly, this time with a small smile on his lips. You close your eyes suddenly, not wanting to see anymore. You step outside of the funeral parlor and whisper “I love you” into the wind.

The sun is shining high in the sky when Teyvat begins to disappear from your vision.

Maybe in another life you and Xiao will spend forever together. You’ll have a grand wedding, start a family, and grow old together like you should have. But for now, you’ll see him from the moon.

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 10]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, guided masturbation, dirty talk, jun being a wild one, sad?????angst(sorry), mentions of break-ins/theft, yet again this chapter was meant to be shorter but here we are 😭🍒 more plot than anything else but enjoy! and as always, thank you so much for your support and interest in Cherry Bomb!! 😭💕💕💕 have a good weekend and don’t forget my halloween intro post goes up tomorrow as well!! stay hydrated bbys!!💕

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - ?

“Damn.”

Seungcheol sits beside you Friday morning, lips pressed into a firm line when he sees the five-digit number staring back at him from your revenue page. 

“Yeah, it’s---I--I’m…”

The two of you fall into a tense silence as you both stare at the exorbitant amount of money that the videos have made, unsure of what to say or even think.

“Um, I mean, o-obviously you get a cut of the money too, ‘Cheol! You’re half the video so…”

“Yeah, but even so, that’s---that’s an insane amount of money we made off of, what, three videos?”

You nod back slowly, sighing as you rest against the back of the sofa. “I’m not gonna lie, I didn’t think… they’d do that well. Like, not saying we suck! We obviously don’t, but just… I didn’t think they’d do that well.”

Seungcheol laughs, leaning back against the cushions as he meets your blushing face. “I could quit my job and just cam with you for this amount of money. I mean, this much off of three videos? Imagine if we were regulars together.”

The thought alone sends your mind into a flurry of various ideas; biting your lip as you lean into Seungcheol’s shoulder.

“Hey, I have an idea for tomorrow’s show but remind me to ask you later!”

hoshi_tiger_xx: still out of town baby?

sleepy_wonu: i feel like you moved and you’re just not ready to tell us lol

Seungcheol smirks reading the comments; eyes flitting over to you from his place on the sofa.

“Moved? I wish! This place is probably waaaay more than my own rent though~” You pause, letting the sound of donations sound off and comments fly past on your laptop screen. “And I’m probably heading home tomorrow so get ready to say bye to this backdrop!” You pout.

therealchan99: can we quickly discuss those videos tho

angelhan: actually yes

Biting your lip, you note that Seungcheol’s eyes are already on you and that you’ve already hit the donation minimum to start your show. “Well…” You start pushing the straps of your bra down, unhooking the back until you can toss the flimsy material off. “What do you guys want to know? You know I kiss and tell~”

dom.cheol: how does he gets you so fuckin wet, baby?

alphagyu97: ur not rly friends are u? Is he ur bf?

alphagyu97: im not pressed either im just curious!!!

universe_WZ: thats what they all say

chwenon: yooo that last vid was fuckin fire tho

tangerine_kwan has donated $50

tangerine_kwan: is he ever gonna join u on cam? think u guys would be good

“Hmm~ Well, let’s start with dom.cheol’s question…” You shoot the camera a sultry smirk as you spread your legs; fingertips already dancing along the lace of your panties. “It’s really not hard~ He’s really good at what he does, y’know? Knows how to talk to me and get my panties wet~”

xcaliburDK: is he good looking

kitty_junjun: probably not as well as me 🤪

gentleman_josh95: stop while u r ahead

Letting out a soft giggle, you watch as Seungcheol rounds the sofa, leaning up against the back of it as he faces you. He keeps his phone in hand, thumb still dancing across the keyboard.

dom.cheol: he has to punish you so often though, baby.

artist8hao: i know, whats gotten into u babygirl? Why r u acting out so much?

“‘Cause I like it when he punishes me~” You lick your lips as you hook your thumbs into your panties, slowly guiding them down your legs. “But I like it when he’s sweet to me too~” Your eyes dance up to Seungcheol, tossing the material his way before speaking.

“Won’t you be sweet to me now?”

alphagyu97: oh shit hes there

universe_WZ: let him fuck your pretty pussy on cam baby

“Aww, I’d love that but he’s still a ‘lil too shy for a live show!” You run your fingertips through your folds, collecting the wetness on them before you bring them to your lips. “But not shy enough to lend your voice, maybe?”

“If that’s what you want, sweetheart.”

Seungcheol makes sure to raise his voice enough so that he’s within earshot of the mic; adrenaline rushing through his veins when he, too, notices the sudden influx of comments and donations at his sudden appearance. “My baby’s been good today though, hasn’t she?” Nodding, you get lost in Seungcheol’s firm stare as the sound of donations and comments fire off in the background.

“Mmhmm~ So why don’t you guide me and show me how a good girl gets rewarded?”

He sets his phone down onto the back of the sofa precariously, both hands in the pockets of his sweats as he watches you. “Normally, good girls get to sit on my cock but we’ll save that for another time, baby. For now, why don’t you get those fingers nice and wet for me? Let them see how good that mouth of yours is.”

therealchan99: those pretty lips that look so good around a cock, just like i thought

sleepy_wonu has donated $100

sleepy_wonu: fuck yeah

You make sure your fingers are properly wet before you drag them down your body, soft sighs on your lips. “Don’t tease me too much though, okay?” Seungcheol grins in return, picking up his phone and sending a quick donation to keep up appearances before he glances your way again.

“Of course. So why don’t you play with that cute ‘lil clit of yours. Bet it’s still nice and sensitive after last night, huh?”

A stuttered moan falls from your lips the second you start rubbing slow circles on your clit; eyes fluttering shut at the memory alone.

xcaliburDK: fuck, all that cum spilling out of her cunt was hot

artist8hao: bet she was nice and full huh? Such a shame she wasted it

Seungcheol chuckles under his breath, “Right? Guess I’ll just have to fuck it deeper into her pussy next time.” You can’t help but clench around emptiness as you pinch your clit between your fingers at his words.

“Ngh, he made me come home with cum trickling down my thighs…” You whimper, “Not that I minded.”

“She begged me to fuck her in the shower too. Wanted me to mark you up real pretty, didn’t you? So that all your viewers could see.”

“Mmhmm…” He watches as you slowly slide your fingers down your folds to your entrance before they slide back up to your clit. “Why don’t you put two fingers in, hmm? Pretend they’re mine while you fuck yourself on them.”

kitty_junjun: aww her fingers are so small compared to yours

gentleman_josh95: bet its not even enough for her anymore huh?

dom.cheol: probably not

You slowly ease in two fingers at once; moaning when you sink them knuckle deep. “O-oh, fuck… Wha--what should I do n-next?”

“Fuck yourself on them, baby. Go however fast or slow you want to. Make yourself cum on your fingers.” He pauses; running a hand through his hair before he shoots you a devilish smirk. “But tell me how badly you wish it were me, ‘cause we both know you do.”

alphagyu97: wheeew lets hear it babygirl

tangerine_kwan: yea baby tell us

“It’s---It’s not the s-same… ‘Cause your fingers are b-bigger than mine…” You whimper, “And--a-ah, and they’re longer too…” Scissoring your fingers, you let out a breathy moan when you start thrusting your fingers faster into yourself.

“I wish it were your fingers, knuckle deep inside my pussy and making me cum. F-fuck, and stretching me open…”

You place your thumb on your clit; rubbing harsh circles on the nub as you chase your high. 

Seungcheol watches with keen eyes, the way your heels dig into the sheets and the way your brows furrow in concentration; licking his lips when he can tell you’re already close to your orgasm.

“Now let’s see that pretty pussy cum, sweetheart.”

You towel your hair off after your shower; shuffling towards the living area as Seungcheol settles into his makeshift bed on the sofa.

“Don’t you want to sleep in the bed with me for once, ‘Cheol?”

His lips press into a lopsided smile, “Are you asking because it’s your last night here?”

“Maybe~”

He lets out a breathy laugh as he reaches for his pillow, gesturing you back towards his bed. “By the way, what was your idea for your show?” You sit cross-legged on the bed just as Seungcheol sets his pillow back against the headboard.

“...How do you feel about maybe filming with me at my place?” He quirks a brow at you just as he settles onto what he deems his side of the bed for the night. “Do tell.” He has a vague idea of where this is heading, but he lets you continue; curiosity eating away at him the longer you hesitate.

“Well, I was thinking… Maybe, and only if you’re okay with it, but… I was thinking maybe you could drive me back to my place? And I know it’s about an hour out from here but I’ll pay gas money! And we can just start heading towards my apartment a little before my show starts. That way you can use toys on me ‘n stuff. And I don’t mind if you spend the night either ‘cause it’ll probably be kinda late when we finish...”

Seungcheol nods; already thinking about the possibilities with the amount of toys you had at your place compared to his. “I mean, yeah, why not? And don’t worry about the gas money, I think we’ve both made enough money this week to last us a while.”

You can only pout in return, laying on your stomach next to Seungcheol who stares up at the ceiling. “Speaking of which… What’re we gonna do now?”

“What do you mean?”

Sighing, you run your fingers through your damp hair. “I mean… What are we going to do about the videos? Are--Are we still going to film together?”

His lips press into a firm line as a million thoughts run through his mind; he’d thought about it a lot himself the past few days since. “I have an idea but I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel about it.”

“Shoot, we’ve got nothin’ to lose I don’t think!”

Seungcheol eases onto his side as he meets your stare, “First of all, I don’t mind filming more videos with you. And to be honest, it’ll probably take me a bit of time before I’m okay with showing my face but I don’t mind being on your live cam shows either, if we can figure out some camera angles. But the thing is… I think if we’re going to be filming together, you need to change your filming schedule.”

Panic runs through you for a second at the idea but you quickly push it aside to hear his suggestion. “How so?”

“Well, right now you’re doing shows on Fridays and Saturdays, every other Monday and every other Wednesday, right? Your next show is Wednesday which is fine but I think if we end up filming videos together regularly, we need to adjust how often you actually cam and how often we post pre-recorded videos. ‘Cause let’s be real, you’d be way too tired if you kept it that frequent. Three live shows a week and filming with me? It’s way too much for you.”

This time, it’s your lips that press into a firm line. But Seungcheol was right. There was no way you could keep your normal schedule on top of filming with him in between. “That… That makes sense. What are we gonna do about, uh, I mean---’cause we don’t really live near each other…” Mumbling, you trail off, hoping that Seungcheol knew the answer.

“Hmm, well, you can keep your Friday shows and then I can swing by on the weekends. We can film a few videos over the weekend, even if they’re just short ones, or even film long ones and then you can just cut them into shorter pieces. So, in theory, you’d only do two live shows a week and one upload of both of us? We can figure out everything else as we go in terms of splitting profits and stuff.”

You nod at his suggestion, feeling better about the idea. “That sounds reasonable! I’ll have to make a notice for my page but hopefully it shouldn’t be too big of a change…”

Seungcheol yawns as he stretches, eyes filled with sleep when he looks at you.

“We don’t have to do anything too soon either. Those videos are still makin’ money so let’s get some sleep!”

You and Seungcheol spend the Saturday afternoon driving around town; even going so far as to drop by the roller rink one last time to say your thanks and goodbye to Jeongguk.

“The two of you are somethin’ else, man. Really. With my whole heart, I just--I love it.” He pretends to wipe a tear off of his face as you and Seungcheol share a look.

“Promise me you’ll think of my offer?”

You nod in return, a soft giggle escaping your lips. “I promise! Seungcheol tells me you stream often yourself so I feel like I can trust you but only if you get my good side too!” This time Jeongguk’s eyes light up with excitement as he reaches for your hands over the concession stand counter.

“Oh my god, if---if I promise to give you half a cut of profits, would you show up on my gaming stream? You don’t even have to be good, just if we collabed, I really think---”

“Okay, ‘Guk, I think that’s enough for now. You can ask her a thousand questions next time.” You pat Jeongguk’s hands as he pouts. “I’ll think about it, okay?” You whisper under your breath; a small smile on his lips as he nods back.

“Don’t be a stranger!”

Seungcheol links his hand with yours as he leads you out of the roller rink and back to his car; eyes flitting to his watch to check the time. “We’ve got time to have dinner and then we probably need to hit the road after.” You nod, “Sounds good! Where are we headin’ for dinner?”

“‘Guk and I went to this diner called ‘Dynamite’ a while back… The food’s alright and I haven’t taken you there yet so we can go there if you’re okay with it?”

“Sounds good!”

Seungcheol pulls into the parking lot of the diner 30 minutes later as the same neon signs greet him back. He parks near the entrance again, noting that it seemed fairly empty this time as well.

“I wonder if the guy is still here…” He mutters as he unbuckles his seatbelt. “What guy?”

The two of you exit his car; jogging up to him as he waits for you. “Just the guy who was our server when I was here with ‘Guk. He seemed familiar and it was weird.”

Seungcheol opens the door for you, letting you in first as the cold AC blasts you.

“Welcome to Dynamite, I’m Jun and I----Oh fuck!” Jun drops the menus in his hand, lips settling into a wide smile as he walks up to you and Seungcheol, tripping on his own feet as he meets you at the door. “I’m a big fan!” He harshly whispers. You blink up at him just before your eyes flit down to his pastel coloured name tag.

Jun.

Jun.

Oh. kitty_junjun.

“O-oh, you’re---you’re kitty_junjun aren’t you?” You whisper back; already noting that he was quite handsome himself.

Fuck, are all my regulars hot?

“That’s me, baby! And oh--you! It’s you! I remember you from last time! You were with that other guy! Are you… y’know. The guy.” Jun wiggles his eyebrows as he steps back and picks up two menus from the counter. Seungcheol mentally grimaces but he nods.

“That’d be me.”

Jun’s eyes light up with enthusiasm as he gestures for the two of you to follow him towards the seating area. “I’m such a huge fan, really! Of Cherry and, well, really both of you now.” He leads you to a booth before he sets the menus down onto the table. “I hope you don’t mind but I volunteer to be your server and the milkshakes are on me tonight!” Finishing with a wink, he leaves the two of you alone as he walks back towards the counter.

“Wow, ‘Cheol when you said small town, you really meant it, huh?” Giggling, you take in Seungcheol’s mildly embarrassed appearance. “Hey, you’re famous!”

Am I famous? He thinks, Or is it just my dick?

“So that’s three people that could clock me in person… I mean, I guess it could be worse.” He mumbles; cheeks flushed pink when he sees Jun walking back towards your table. Jun leans against the booth, nodding as he props a hand on his hip.

“Sorry, I hope I’m not bothering you guys. It’s just, I feel like I’m meeting a celebrity!” He laughs, “I’d ask for your autograph but then I think that’d be a little too weird.”

You can’t help but giggle at his comment, turning slightly to face him better. “Guess you were right when you said you thought you saw me, huh?” He snaps his fingers as the memory comes back to him in an instant.

“You’re right! Fuck, I almost forgot about that. Man, I thought I was having a fever dream.”

Jun stares off to the side before he fixes his gaze onto Seungcheol; eyes wide. “Hey, I never caught your name, I don’t think?” Seungcheol gulps, hoping that Jun doesn’t connect the dots as easily as Jeongguk did.

“It’s Seungcheol.”

“Oh… okay! Well, cool, are you guys ready to order?”

He lets out a breath he doesn’t realize he was holding as you relay your order to Jun; lips falling into a shaky smile as he gives his order to Jun once you were done.

“Okay! I’ll be back in a little bit!” Jun shoots the two of you a smile before he leaves the two of you alone again.

“Well, this is an interesting Saturday if I do say so myself!” Seungcheol can’t stop the laugh that bubbles out of him; shaking his head at the way you seem to take it so easily. “I can’t believe you’re so chill about running into people that know you!”

“Like you said, ‘Cheol! It could be worse~” You pause, “This one time I was at the grocery store and this older man came up to me and said he recognized me. I was like, cool, y’know? I know my viewers are all different ages so I don’t judge. But then, two kids came up to him calling him ‘daddy’ and I literally bolted out of that place before his wife could find me!”

The two of you share a laugh before changing the topic; only stopping when Jun comes by with your orders, twenty minutes later.

“Hey, this is kinda random but it’s not so busy right now, so… Did you wanna sit with us and chat?” You offer as your eyes dance between Seungcheol and Jun. The latter’s eyes twinkle with excitement as he sets the last plate down.

“Wait, seriously? I can take my 15 if you’re being serious!” This time, you look to Seungcheol for his opinion, already noticing the way he seems more relaxed.

“Yeah, that’s cool with me.”

Jun all but runs off to tell his manager as you scoot over to give him space when he gets back. “I’m surprised you asked if he wanted to sit with us while we had dinner.”

“Why not? He seems nice! And we’re making friends!” Seungcheol nods in agreement just as he starts eating and just as Jun makes it back to the booth with a milkshake of his own.

You pat the empty spot next to you as he gasps slightly. “I feel like the second luckiest man on earth.”

He slides into the booth next to you, making sure to keep a reasonable distance. “Hey! You’ve got a show tonight so… are you two, y’know…” Seungcheol makes a conscious effort to not choke on his food as he chews slower than he usually would; eyes flitting over to you just as you set your utensils down.

“Um, yeah! We don’t really know what we’re gonna do yet but no spoilers okay~ Nobody knows what he looks like, Junnie!” You pout. Jun can only vibrate in his seat; a pink blush on his cheeks at the sudden nickname.

“Of course! My lips are sealed shut! And well, if you’re ever back in town, I’ll give you guys my employee discount if you swing by!” He grins.

The three of you talk about various topics within Jun’s fifteen minute break, thankfully none that involve camming. Jun pouts when his time is up, a sigh on his lips when he stands. “Damn, well, I guess I’ll see you later then, huh?” He wiggles his eyebrows, chuckling.

“Just wave me over if you guys need anything, okay?”

The rest of dinner goes on without issue and Seungcheol finds himself in a lighter mood than when the two of you first arrived at the diner.

You make sure to leave Jun a big tip, winking at him on your way out.

“Ready to head home after a week?” Seungcheol shoots you  a sad smile as he walks you to the passenger’s side of his car. He opens the door for you and lets you in before shutting it and jogging to the driver’s side.

“I mean, it’s not like we’re not gonna see each other anymore. If anything we’re gonna be seeing each other fairly regularly since you’re gonna come over to film!”

Seungcheol nods as he sets your apartment into his GPS; pulling out of the driveway as he begins the hour drive to your place.

“Yeah, and I mean, we can figure out what schedule works better as we go. Maybe we only need to film every other week or something too, right?”

“Mmhmm! I’ll start drafting a notice for the schedule change tomorrow and then I’ll run it by you before it goes up.”

The hour drive seems to go by quicker than you expect as the two of you spend the time singing along to songs on the radio; judging Seungcheol’s impeccable vocal skill when a rock song comes on.

“Wow, I--I didn’t know you had the vocal cords to do that, ‘Cheol!” He takes his eyes off of the road for a split second to shoot you a cocky grin.

“I’m pretty good at karaoke. We should go next time! Maybe invite all of our new friends.”

You snort in response, slapping his arm as he pulls into a residential part of town. “And if the person working the front desk of the karaoke place knows us?”

“Then we invite them in too!”

A slight blush paints your cheeks when you realize how much Seungcheol seemed to have relaxed in the last few days, if not hours. You knew it was never easy to get used to being recognized in person and there were still a lot of times where even you were flustered in person. 

“Hey, what’s going on over there?” Seungcheol’s concerned voice has you immediately peering through the window; eyebrows furrowed when you see the police cars parked outside of your apartment complex.

“W--wait that’s my--my apartment complex, ‘Cheol pull over!”

He parks the car a little closer to the scene; getting out of the car with you as the dread becomes more and more evident on your face. “Hey, I’m here with you, okay? Maybe it’s just nothing.” He offers; simultaneously knowing that his words were currently going in one ear and out the other.

The two of you walk hand in hand up to the front where you spot your landlord standing with a police officer. You call her name as she turns to you, gesturing for you to come closer.

“Didn’t you get my text message? Or any of my calls from the last 45 minutes?” You shake your head no in response, eyes dancing to Seungcheol who’s expression matches your own. “No--No I--I was out at dinner, I didn’t even hear my phone go off. What’s going on here?”

She sighs, arms crossed in front of her chest as the police officer clears his throat. “Well, Miss, there were a few break-ins tonight here. There’s a lot of broken glass and a lot of missing items. Thankfully nobody was injured but unfortunately we’re going to be running an investigation so it could take some time.”

“I--w--what about m-my apartment?” Your landlord sighs, “I’m sorry, honey, but your apartment was one of them, I---hey!”

You all but drag Seungcheol with you as you start making your way towards the entrance of the complex, panic and adrenaline guiding you as you all but throw the front door open. The sounds of the officer and your landlord shouting your name become fuzzy as you make your way through the halls; side stepping the stray items that were left on the floor. You make it to your hall when you notice a police officer standing at your front door that seems to have almost been ripped from the hinges.

“Miss, you can’t be in here, we’re---”

“This is my apartment, please just let me in!”

The officer standing at your apartment door notes the distress in your voice and sighs, “Show me some ID and I can let you in.” You quickly fish out your ID as he cross-references it with his documents. “Alright, go ahead. Please just don’t touch any of the hard surfaces.”

Your palm feels clammy against Seungcheol’s as you step into your apartment; shaky gasps on your lips when you notice the items strewn about. “O-oh my god…”

Seungcheol squeezes your hand tight, unsure of what to say. This was definitely the last thing he would’ve expected to happen at the end of your one week stay with him.

You can’t help the tears that threaten to spill as you look around your apartment and Seungcheol quickly notes the glassy look in your eyes when you turn to face him. Seungcheol quickly turns to the officer, voice stern. “I’m sorry to ask but can you give us a second alone, please? This is a lot for her to take in.” The officer nods as he steps back into the hallway.

“Baby? Tell me how you’re feeling, sweetheart.”

It only takes a split second before you’re sobbing into Seungcheol’s chest; his arms wrapping tightly around you.

He rubs your back gently, cooing to you softly as you let out your emotions. “Seungcheol, I, hic, wh--what am I--I, hic, g-gonna d-do? I…” You trail off as your mind goes a mile a minute. He’s unsure of how to comfort you, eyes taking in the ransacked room.

“We--we should probably talk to the officer outside? Figure out what’s going on. I--I mean, you’re definitely coming home with me. I’m not leaving you here like this and with nowhere to go.”

You pull away from his chest, tears still streaming down your face when you look up at him. Seungcheol feels his heart shatter into a thousand pieces. God please, I’d do anything to make sure she never cries like this again, he thinks.

“But my--my s-stuff, I--this--”

“I know, baby, I know. Let’s just both be thankful you weren’t here when they broke in, okay? We can replace the material stuff.” He smooths your hair down and wipes your cheeks, leaning down until he’s at eye level with you.

“I promise you, we’ll figure it out, okay? I’m not leaving you until we do.”

Nodding, you let Seungcheol take your hand as he brings you back to the front door where the officer is. “Hello? Excuse me?”

“Yes?”

Seungcheol looks your way before clearing his throat. “We just want to know what happened to my girlfriend’s apartment.” You squeeze his hand, hiding behind him.

“Well, we can’t really know for sure. A few other apartments were broken into. For some, the locks were picked and for others, it seemed like they just used blunt force against the doors until they gave way. Unfortunately, seeing as this is a gated apartment complex, the hallways don’t have any security cameras and we have no idea how the suspects got in past the gate.” The officer pauses for a moment as he lets his words sink in. “Usually with cases like this, a lot of the material goods eventually show up in local pawn shops or even just discarded in near-by trash containers. And judging from the building history, this isn’t the first time these burglars came by. This seems to be the second time. But that’s all we know for now. I suggest you pack some of your things and hang tight in a hotel until we get more info because, unfortunately, your door is ready to fall off of the hinges and we need to get a detective in here to see if there’s any fingerprints on the surfaces.”

“Will there be someone patrolling this place all night? How are we sure they won’t come back?”

“We’ll have an officer posted at all times, young man. I promise you nobody will get back in here.”

The tears stream down your cheeks as you quietly stand behind Seungcheol; lip quivering as Seungcheol thanks the officer for the information before turning to face you again.

“‘Ch--Cheol, what’re w-we, hic, gonna d-do now?” Your voice sounds so small to him as you keep your eyes focused on the floor.

“Has your apartment been broken into before? Be honest with me.” 

“O--once, but--but it w-wasn’t this bad...” He clenches his jaw at your words. How the fuck did this happen before without anyone finding out? “Wait, so this has happened in the past? And you never said anything?” You peer up at him, eyelashes wet with tears. 

“It, hic, they--they didn’t take as much s-stuff that t-time. But--but now I’m, hic, won--wondering if they were just s-scouting...” Seungcheol’s vision goes red; knowing exactly what he wanted to do and say but unsure of the possible outcome.

Fuck, screw it.

“Here’s what we’re gonna do, sweetheart.” He pauses, exhaling deeply before he continues. “We’re gonna pack a bag, take all your important things that you can find. I don’t care if we have to fill up my entire car with your things. And you’re coming home with me. I don’t care if you have to break the lease on this place, but I can’t in good conscience know you’re living here if people are breaking into it like this.” You open your mouth to speak, brows furrowed. “But--”

“No! No buts this time. I--I can have Jeongguk help with moving. I’m sure Seokjin-hyung can take his shift at the roller rink for one day to help us move your things. And we’ll figure things out as we go.”

“The r-rent, I--”

Seungcheol shoots you a small smile as he tilts your head up to meet his soft and warm eyes. “Please, don’t worry about something like that right now. I’m just happy you’re okay. And that you weren’t here alone where I couldn’t help you.”

You nod shakily, hands covering Seungcheol’s as he holds your face in his hands. “Seungcheol, I’m so--so sorry, I--I don’t even k-know where to start, I--this is---it’s all just so much. Really I can just---just get a h-hotel and you can g-go home...” The tears threaten to spill again but Seungcheol quickly tugs you into his inviting arms. 

This was by-far not at all how he expected to end his weekend. And he could only assume you felt the same way.

“I know it’s a lot. But we’re good at figuring things out on the fly, right? You have to trust me on this one. You’ll be okay. We’ll be okay. But for right now, I think you need to hurry and post a notice that there’s no show tonight while I look for your luggage so we can grab some things and get out of here, okay?” 

He releases you from his hold, leaning down to kiss you on the forehead. 

“I’ll fix it, I promise.”

[tsukifanbase]

Obey Me! Brothers Visit MC During Autumn: Lucifer, Mammon, and Belphie

Authors Note: i'm thinking I might make this a series, like at the beginning of every season just something similar to this 👀 sorry I haven't written much lately! school's taking up pretty much all my time nowadays-- anywhosie, enjoy! [ also s p o i l e r s] (oh btw this is gonna take place after mc leaves devildom for the summer, before they come back to devildom) lmk if yall want pt 2 with the other characters

Warnings: fluff, bruh absolute just fluff everywhere like so much, mb a lil bit of angst but that's what all my writing is like so hehe

----------------

Lucifer

- i feel like lucifer would’ve visited you in the human realm before

- like probably sometime over the summer, but he hadn’t seen you in a while and he was starting to miss his favorite human :(

- not like he’d ever admit to that

- i don’t think luci would really be the type to wait until you summoned him for something, if he wants to make sure you’re okay, he’s gonna come see you lmao

- anyways

- lucifer had been staring out the window for quite a while- he had been doing paperwork, but somehow even when you were in a different realm, you managed to disrupt him

- he chuckled to himself at that thought, then sighed

- you had been rather difficult to focus around, always getting yourself into trouble

- luci couldn’t catch a break when you went to RAD

- he missed you

- a lot

- lucifer glanced back at his desk, where he had been working just moments before

- his eyes landed on an unsigned piece of paper that had your name on it

- you could come back home if he got you to sign it

- in truth, lucifer hadn’t really thought about finding a way to get you back to devildom. he certainly missed you, but the idea that he could actually arrange your return just hadn’t hit him yet

- until three days prior, when the sheet with your name on it appeared on his desk

- lucifer had a sneaking suspicion who put it there

- it was diavolo let’s be real

- the real mystery was why lucifer hadn’t gone to bring you the permission slip already

- he had waited- it had been three days, and he couldn’t make up his mind if he wanted to go give it to you

- lucifer didn’t want to put you in the position of having to choose between your life in the human realm or your life in devildom

- but he missed you

- and so, luci checked his watch to make sure it wasn’t three in the morning, then grabbed the permission slip before making his way outside 

- it would be okay to be selfish, just this once, right?

- lucifer arrived at your home at four in the afternoon, you weren’t there

- so he found a way to open the door, bruv you hid the key under the doormat he didn’t really have a hard time lmao 

- you walked into your bedroom at nearly quarter past four and immediately flopped onto your bed

- you didn’t even notice that lucifer was watching from your desk in the corner of your room

- he walked over to you and stared at you

- bro he literally didn’t say anything, he just waited ahaha thats not creepy

- lucifer crossed his arms over his chest and you finally looked up 

- your eyes locked and you quietly asked, “luci?”

- lucifer narrowed his gaze at you and answered you with an, “mhm?”

- and then you freaked out, because honestly you half thought you were hallucinating or something, you jumped up to give lucifer a hug

- don’t get me wrong here, i have the intense feeling that lucifer doesn’t like hugs, but i also have the intense feeling that you and the occasional brother are the exception to that rule

- so

- when you clasped your arms around him, luci barely hesitated in returning the gesture

- he pulled you close, like he never wanted to let go again

- you eventually pulled back to ask why he had come to visit you

- it wasn’t like he didn’t visit often, just usually he had a reason to, even if it was just because he wanted to check up on you

- oh and all that nerve luci had about being selfish for once in his lifetime, yeah that was gone XD

- so your question kinda caught him off guard, like it just seemed like he forgot because for a hot sec he was just staring at you like, ‘uh huh im sorry what was that?’

- when he didn’t answer, you took the lead

- “do you wanna go to the fall festival with me?”, you asked, a bright grin spreading across your face

- and obviously luci knew what a fall festival was, he just didn’t really see your request coming

- but i mean he nodded so lmao

- pretty soon y’all were walking down the street, stopping at random carts at the festival to look at autumn themed stuff

- luci didn’t have human money, so every time he showed a vague interest in something and you offered to buy it for him, he would start squabbling about not wanting you to spend your money and blah blah

- you’d wait until he started walking away from the cart and then buy it for him anyways ;)

- somehow along the way, lucifer suggested you guys hold hands to stay together in the crowd uh huh yeah right lmao

- it was nearing the end of the festival when you remembered there was a park down the street, so you turned to luci and asked, “mind if i show you something?”

- he agreed and you guys started walking down the street, and lemme say the park kinda blew lucifer’s mind

- he was aware that leaves on trees changed colors depending on the season, but he wasn’t expecting how beautiful they were 

- yellows, and oranges, some red, here and there

- and then he turned to look at you

- right at home, where you belonged

- wearing a shirt luci was pretty sure you stole from him, sipping warm apple cider

- the most beautiful thing in that entire park was you, he was sure of it

- lucifer felt the permission slip crinkle in his pocket, and he made up his mind about showing it to you

- he wasn’t going to

- “lucifer, are you okay?”, you sounded concerned, and you brought the hand that had been holding his own to brush a piece of his hair out of his face

- lucifer smiled at you, really smiled, and then replied, “yes, my dear, i’m quite all right”

Mammon

- ok so u guys remember when about two minutes ago i said lucifer wasn’t the type to wait until you summoned him

-well let’s give mammon some credit where it’s due

- he triedd to wait until you summoned him

- bb is many things but he is not patient XD

- ok lets get into it

- mammon was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling

- he wasn’t really thinking about anything?? but he had been sitting there for like an hour lmao

- asmo and satan were standing in the doorway like, ‘is he okay? does he need a doctor?’

- since usually when people think of mammon they do not think, ah yes his normal activity of... doing nothing?

- then out of nowhere, mammon sat up and his brothers quickly fled the scene to avoid being caught lmao

- mammon got a big grin on his face, and he strut out of his room to go bother you

- he had gotten into the habit of going to find you whenever he was bored or lonely

- he arrived at your bedroom, and just before his fist hit the door to knock, he realized that you weren’t in there

- that you weren’t even in devildom

- mammon barely hesitated before spinning on his heel and heading to lucifer’s office

- he wasn’t even really conscious of what he was doing, but mammon knew why he was about to go ask to visit you

- he needed you, more than he ever truly realized

- when you arrived at your apartment that afternoon, you were greeted by your landlord in the lobby, he informed you that there was a strange man sitting outside of your apartment, who was insisting that he needed to see you

- you practically dropped the grocery bag you were holding, nodded to your landlord, thanked him, and then began sprinting towards your apartment

- mammon was sitting in front of your door, staring down at his hands, he didn’t even notice that you had walked up to him

- you immediately noticed something was off with him, so you dropped to your knees to bring him into a hug, “what’s wrong?”

- he smiled to himself as he wrapped his arms around you, “nuthin'”, now that you were with him

- after you both relished in being reunited, you hopped up and grinned at him, “you’ve got perfect timing!”

- you went to unlock your apartment door, and pointed at the grocery bag that you had abandoned on the floor- it was full of apples

- mammon stood and picked up the bag for you, “apples?”, he questioned, he wasn’t really familiar with human cuisine but it seemed a little bit strange to just buy a massive bag of apples

- “i’m gonna make desert!”, you opened the door and walked into your apartment, then closed the door behind mammon, “and you’re gonna help me”

- the smile you gave him made his heart melt

- he had missed you so much

- “pfffff, why would i do that?”, mammon’s cheeks were flushed red, he crossed his arms and looked away from you, trying to hide his embarrassment 

- you were grabbing something out of your cabinet, it looked like sugar, “because”, you smiled at him 

- “what kind of reason is that-”

- he helped you make the apple pie lmao

- mammon lifted a bite of the pie up to his face to look at it, “what even is this?” 

- he wasn’t asking in a mean way, he just genuinely didn’t know what he was looking at lol

- “just try it! i promise you’ll like it!”, you told him from the kitchen, you were putting away ingredients

- mammon huffed, and you gave him an offer he couldn’t refuse

- “if you try it, i’ll give you a present”, he immediately tried the dessert

- greedy boi

- mammon thought it was delicious, but he wasn’t about to tell you that, “i guess it’s alright, now you’re gonna gimme something?” 

- you nodded and walked over to where he was sitting, “hey, what’re ya doin’?”, you gave him a peck on the cheek

- mammon fell silent for a second, and then his face burst into flames as he watched you grin and return to putting things away

- and honestly that was the best gift you could’ve given him

Belphie

- ok so im sorry but belphie is definitely the type of demon to wait for you to summon him

- i don’t make the rules XD

- he is tired boy, and while he may love and care about you a lot, going to the human realm takes a lotttttttt of energy lmao

- like he has to walk allllllll the way to lucifer’s office and ugh just like no too much work

- so anyways lmao

- you hadn’t really planned on summoning bel at all

- you were lying in bed, a lazy morning like so many you had shared together

- this one was more beautiful than any you had ever experienced before

- the leaves were changing colors just outside your window, the sunlight of a late morning breaching your bedroom through the leaves, and hitting your face

- the weather had gotten colder recently, so you had added more blankets to your bed to accommodate

- or maybe you were trying to make up for the loss of your cuddle buddy

- either way, you were wrapped securely in blankets

- and everything seemed perfect

- except you were missing the best part of sleeping in, of staying in bed until the early afternoon

- you were missing your best friend

- so you decided to change that

- you barely had to think about how to summon him, one second, he wasn’t there, and the next, belphie was lying on top of you

- he was sleeping, as usual

- bel clutched you tight in his sleep, mumbling something about missing you under his breath

- he was dreaming about you

- because as little energy he had to go visit, that didn’t mean that belphie didn’t miss you

- in fact, nearly every day since you left devildom, bel had complained to beel about how cold his bed was

- bel had trouble sleeping for a while after you left, unbelievable, but true

- he had grown so accustomed to falling asleep every night to the sound of your breath, your scent, your warmth

- belphie opened his eyes mid afternoon, he realized why he had been sleeping so soundly when he glanced down to see who he was hugging

- your eyes were closed and he assumed you were asleep

- bel sighed blissfully and hugged you tighter, pressing a kiss to your head

- “i missed you”, he mumbled into your hair

- “i missed you too, bel”

[kal-djarin]

Memories From the Past

Fandom: Star Wars

Date Posted: February 8th, 2021

Pairing: Reader x Obi-Wan Kenobi

Warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive themes but no actual smut, fighting? 

Request: n/a

A/N: Okay I’m actually kinda proud of this one. I really love the dynamic of Obitine so I tried to translate that into fic without stealing the entire plot, but it steal is very obviously similar. I really hope the flash back scenes and change in pov. make sense, I had some issues trying to figure out what tense I should use for them, but hopefully it’s not confusing. IM SORRY THE ENDING IS RUSHED!!! As always please let me know what you think!! 

Word Count: 4.5k 

The news of Jedi Obi-Wan Kenobi’s return to Sundari caused an array of emotions throughout the Palace. The Royal Guards were more watchful than usual, still not truly able to release the years of grudges held against the Jedi Order and Satine, was glad to be reunited with her old friend, despite the impromptu meeting being over possible changes in where the planet stood in the Clone Wars; a figure dressed in Mandalorian armour attacking a Republic cruiser would bring anyone to question the supposed position of neutrality Mandalore held.

You, on the other hand, were instantly filled with dread. Years have passed from the last time you have laid eyes on Obi-Wan and still the mere mention of him causes hundreds of memories to resurface.

When Satine became Duchess of Mandalore, many people were happy, but there were still insurgents that would not accept her pacifist leadership. They would send bounty hunters to try to eliminate her and the power she held. These constant threats against her life compelled Obi-Wan and his Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn to remove her and you, her most trusted advisor, from Mandalore and live on the run for nearly a year.

You lived one day at a time, trying to focus on surviving the present and live to see what uncertainties the future held. Most people would think that living in such dubious conditions would be terrifying, but it was one of the best years of your life.

Right when you met Obi-Wan, you were instantly turned off by him, despite his handsome looks. His diplomatic kindness and reverence felt impersonal and fake instead of charming and he was far too arrogant for your liking. Qui-Gon, on the other hand, was someone you befriended very quickly. His empathetic and wise nature instantly connected the two of you and he became almost like a father-figure. He was constantly giving you advice and was the only reason you tolerated Obi-Wan in the beginning.

Obi-Wan instantly felt this disfavor towards him, bringing out his sarcasm and frequent jabs, making him even more unbearable. The two of you spent weeks either trying to see who could irritate the other more or just completely ignoring each other, to both Qui Gon and Satine’s dismay. Qui-Gon always tried convincing you that you and Obi-Wan would make a great pair if the two of you would just stop being so stubborn, but his advice fell onto deaf ears.

Your hostility towards each other did die however, when you were being chased by venom-mites on a cliff on Draboon. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan fought them off as you and Satine escaped to the ship. Satine ran onto the boarding ramp and just as you were about to join her, you tripped over a divot in the ground, the momentum of it almost completely hurtling you off the side of the cliff, had you not grabbed a hold of the ledge.

All you can remember was the absolute terror that coursed through your veins and Satine’s horrified scream. Your body was hung over what seemed to be a bottomless pit and the only thing anchoring it were your hands; hands that were rather weak from a life devoid of physical exertion and that were slipping as each second passed.

You struggled, trying to find a way to climb up to solid land, but soon realized all the effort was fruitless. Obi-Wan, startled by Satine’s cries for help, turned around and saw your rather unfortunate situation. His eyes widened and he quickly turned from his Master and ran towards where you hung. When he was close enough, he slid to his knees and stretched his arm out to you.

“(Y/N), Take my hand!”

You wanted to, you really did, but the fear of falling to transfer your grip from the ground to his hand was too debilitating.

“Obi-Wan, I can’t, I’ll fall!” You managed to choke out

“You have to trust me!” His voice was loud, but still held its usual steadiness. His eyes however gave away his true emotions. They were frantically searching your own trying to convince you to lay your life in his hands. You could practically feel his terror radiating off of him.

Realizing you were out of options, you slowly released your grip and reached out to grasp his outstretched hand. Your fingers barely grazed his own and you knew it was too late. Gravity met you full force, and you felt yourself scream as your body began to plummet.

Then, all of a sudden, a warm cradling feeling caught you, interrupting your imminent death. You felt yourself rise over the cliff and saw Obi-Wan’s concentrated face and twitching hand. When you were about a foot above the ground, you dropped into Obi-Wan’s arms, and let out a sob of relief. Your body was racked with tears, still trying to process what just happened, and Obi-Wan just held you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, seeking comfort for your near death, and leaned against Obi-Wan’s own shaking body.

That day was the start of a new relationship for the two of you. You began to confide in each other more and felt the trust between the two of you grow as time passed. Obi-Wan dropped his guard of fake diplomacy and began to act more like himself. Of course, he still had his sarcastic humor, but it was more endearing now and his kindness felt genuine.

Soon, your relationship became more than just finding comfort in each other. When one of you couldn’t sleep, you and Obi-Wan would just sit together and talk until you became tired or if it was time to get up. Being around him was effortless and there was an understanding the two of you had that was rare to find. Of course, there was still tension between the two of you but it was different, less hostile.

If your relationship with him had ended there, innocent and full of what-ifs, you would have been just as excited as Satine was to see him. You wouldn’t currently be standing in the throne room, shaking with anxiety, waiting for him to step through the doors.

Just as you begin to contemplate completely ditching Obi-Wan’s arrival, the doors are opened and you hear the Prime Minister talking to him.

You look down and try to not draw attention to yourself, which is impossible considering Satine insisted you walk in beside her. Satine knew you and Obi-Wan were close, but you never told just how far your relationship with him went, so she didn’t see anything with the reunion. She sits down at the throne and you stand next to her. They greet each other briefly and the sound of Obi-Wan being so close to you again gives you the courage to finally meet his gaze.

He looks absolutely radiant, somehow looking more attractive than you remembered. His hair is a bit longer and a perfectly trimmed bear adorns his handsome face. You can’t help but stare, trying to take in the view you have been deprived of for almost 15 years.

“After all these years, you're even more beautiful than ever,” He says towards Satine, but still keeps his eyes locked on you.

You break the intense eye contact and try to not let his smooth words affect you. He doesn’t falter at your discreet rejection and continues the diplomatic conversation between him and Satine. She invites him on a walk through the city, and to your dismay, she gestures for you to join them. You walk just behind Satine, allowing the two of them to lead the way. Air speeders whistle by around you and people walk around the city, going about their day, unbothered by the Duchess and Jedi moving around them. You hear Satine talk about the current predicament Mandalore has found itself in with the Death Watch and you know you should be paying attention and adding into the conversation for sake of not seeming rude, but can’t help but carefully watch Obi-Wan’s side profile as he walks.

It’s perfect just like the rest of him and triggers yet another memory in your mind: you and his first kiss. It was a couple months after the incident on Draboon, and the four of you were forced to spend the night in a cave because of a rather wild storm. You sat on the cold floor near the fire Qui-Gon made, unable to rest, just watching the rain hit the mouth of the cave for hours. Unlike you, Satine used her time wisely, quickly finding much needed sleep. Qui-Gon had been meditating earlier, but now seemed to be resting as well, facing the inside of the cave. Obi-Wan sat cross-legged, reading a book about, if you remembered from his earlier explanation correctly, the method of Jar’Kai, farthest from the fire.

It wasn’t long before he noticed your restless form and decided to sit down next to you, close enough for your shoulders to touch.

“What’s up with you?” He asked, nudging your shoulder with his own.

Usually this kind of touch wouldn’t have caused you any issues, but more recently, you began to take note of every physical contact the two of you made. Obi-Wan was rather reserved, so knowing he so frequently chose to make contact with you gave you conflicting feelings. You turned and looked at him and suddenly felt rather sad.

“Don’t you wish we could be more carefree, like other people our age?”

He looked taken aback from your sudden question, but soon began to contemplate, fingers coming up to gently grasp his chin. After a moment, he looked back at you and shook his head.

“I never truly have thought about it. Why?” He questions further.

You knew why. No matter how hard you tried to deny it, Obi-Wan has found a special place in your heart. Months of confiding and building trust with one another let you get to know his true personality, making it impossible not to feel so much for him. But, although you were just teenagers, the both of you had responsibilities and expectations of you. He was a Jedi and you had to stay focused on helping Satine rebuild Mandalore after the raging civil war.

So instead of answering his question, you decided to satiate the need to feel reckless by standing up and walking out into the rain. The feel of the cold drops on your skin should have annoyed you, but instead it made you feel alive; it helped numb the feelings you so badly wish you didn’t have.

“What are you doing!” Obi-Wan yelled, looking alarmed at your sudden uncharacteristic decision.

“I’m living!!” You replied, soaking in the feeling of the rain and quickly running back and grabbing his hands with your dripping ones.

“Come on, Obi Wan, join me” You urged. His eyes are wide in shock but, nonetheless, takes off his outer robes and walks out into the rain.

His trust to join you with no question made you feel even more giddy and you dragged him into the middle of the valley that the cave sat in. You grabbed his hands and began to dance, if you could even call it that. Obi-Wan, as comfortable as he was with you, immediately stiffened up, since he was never truly taught how to dance. This setback, however, caused little pause in your actions and you just spun with him around in a circle.

The drumming of the rain did little to drown out your laugh whenever Obi-Wan would stumble, to his dismay, but he too began to chuckle at the unskilled dancing going on. You gazed up at him and just from the look on his face you knew your feelings for him were going nowhere. His hair laid flat on his head, soaked, and his face was covered in water and he looked breathtaking. He  made you feel safe and trusted and maybe that was the reason you decided to risk it all.

You grabbed his face between your hands and pressed your lips to his. It was short-lived, with him quickly pulling away with his eyebrows furrowed and lips parted.

You instantly were filled with regret, embarrassed from the rejection, and went to run back into the cave to hide from your mistake. You felt selfish, trying to act on feelings that completely disrespected everything Obi-Wan lived for. Right when you pulled away from his arms, Obi-Wan quickly grabbed your wrist and pulled you back in.

His hands went up to cradle your face and he kissed you. It was overwhelming how much emotion he was channeling through it. The kiss was needy and hard but his hands were gentle, one of them coming up to tangle itself in your soaked hair. You could tell he was inexperienced, his form being a tad messy, but the passion put into it made up for any mistakes.

You feel a hand rest on your shoulder and are instantly pulled out of the memory. You see Satine looking at you, worry written all over her face.

“(Y/N), are you alright?” She asks, her eyes searching your face.

You go to answer her and shut down any of her worries about you, but catch a glimpse of Obi-Wan and lose the words. His face looks almost distraught and you know he must have seen what you were thinking of. You force yourself to look away from him and respond to Satine.

“Yes, sorry I must have zoned out.” You apologize, hoping she buys your white lie. “As a matter of fact is it alright if I return to the Palace, I think I need a little rest”

She still looks worried, but quickly approves of your request and turns back to walk with Obi-Wan, who still seems bothered by your memory, but remains cordial and attentive.

You turn and go back to the Palace, a single guard flanking your side. When you return, you do exactly what you told Satine, you lie on your bed and rest, or at least try to.

***

When Obi-Wan sensed the memory you were thinking of, he was no longer able to focus on the important matter at hand. Even after the bombing on Mandalore after you left and him nearly being crushed to death on Concordia, he found himself thinking about it. He remembers that day so clearly; the first time he truly gave into his temptations.

He had worked so hard to stay in the Jedi Order- nobody wanted him as a Padawan. He was always not enough and it was only by fate that Qui-Gon decided to take him under his wing. He knew better than anyone that the title of Jedi was invaluable and there you were making him question everything he ever knew. He knew Jedi weren’t supposed to form attachments or express their emotions, so why did he keep indulging himself with your presence.

The moment you kissed him, Obi-Wan’s instinct was to run. He was powerless against the attachment he had to you, so he knew the best way to stop it was to completely remove himself from the situation. He had every intention of doing so when he pulled away the first time, but then his other instincts kicked in. He felt the feel of your hands on his face, the closeness of your body, and realized there was no way he could let this go, at least not now.

Days after the kiss, Obi-Wan was filled with disgust at himself. He hated that he let himself indulge. He hated how he completely disregarded everything he was ever taught. He hated the fact that he loved every second of it, and what he hated most of all is that he began to wonder how it would feel to kiss your neck, skin, and other very un Jedi-like places.

Because of this, the months of progress the two of you made in your relationship were completely erased. He knew it was unfair to you, but he had to uphold the morals of a Jedi, and being around you made that goal impossible. He reverted back to the arrogant and guarded Padawan and pushed you away every time you tried to fix things.

But his efforts were fruitless. You knew Obi-Wan and were not able to let go of his sudden change in personality.

His Master also noticed the sudden change in relationship and decided to take matters in his own hands. He decided to send the two of you off on a mission to retrieve some sort of plant and herb. The two of you walked through the woods, The entire trip, Obi-Wan ignored every attempt of yours to engage in conversation and didn’t even truly acknowledge your presence. You finally decided to confront him, to his dismay.

“Was it truly that horrifying to kiss me, Obi-Wan”

“What?” He said, trying to keep the act up.

“Was it so bad to the point of ignoring me,” You pushed, getting angrier by the minute.

“I hardly see how that is relevant to the current task at han-” He began to deflect but was cut off by you grabbing his shoulder and whipping him around. Angry tears began to form in your eyes and at the site, Obi-Wan felt his facade crack.

“You don’t get to decide to drop me when things get hard, Obi-Wan” You spat, emphasizing your words by jabbing your finger on his chest.

Obi-Wan tried. He tried so hard to stay away from you. But the look of anger and heartbreak on your face made him, give into your spell, once again. He grabbed your hand and looked into your eyes.

He knew he was going to hate himself after, like last time, but the temporary pleasure it brought was impossible to resist, so he kissed you.

The kiss was hard and full of anger: anger at you, at himself, at the Jedi Order, and at the world for making you his weakness. You instantly reacted bringing your hand around to run through his short auburn hair and pulling your body as close as possible.

Obi-Wan deepened the kiss, letting his tongue explore the inners of your mouth, inciting a moan from your lips. Obi-Wan felt himself flush from the obscene sound and couldn’t help but feel bolder from the thought of bringing you pleasure. He started to kiss along your jawline and down your neck, his brain becoming muddled from the pleasure of it all.

You had begun to take off his robes and that was when he came to his senses. He knew he had to stop this, it was completely un Jedi-like and uncivilized, especially out in the open. His thoughts were immediately shut down however when you slid your hand down his chest. He decided to burn every single pleasure and feeling into memory and worry later. Your hand began to venture between his legs and that was the second time Obi-Wan gave into temptation.

You were all he could think about while fighting on Concordia, and he knew this was why Jedi don’t form attachments. Just the memory of your relationship caused his judgement to be clouded. He couldn’t imagine how he would have been if you were there during the fight with Death Watch: constantly worried, focused on an individual rather than the greater good.

He was relieved to get on to the Coronet and away from the memory of his failures as a Jedi, but that relief was short-lived when he saw you boarding the ship alongside Satine.

***

Satine, as strong-willed as ever, insisted on you going to Coruscant with her. She didn’t want you to be alone on Mandalore, vulnerable to the rapidly more aggressive Death Watch attacks. Once aboard the ship, you settle into your temporary room and head down to meet back up with the Duchess, who was currently discussing her position of neutrality with other senators down the hall.

As you walk towards the meeting, you run into a young, handsome man and Obi-Wan. You immediately freeze, not prepared for the sudden direct interaction and just stare at him. “O-Obi-Wan” You stutter out, not knowing how to fully go about this.

Obi-Wan looks equally as startled, but recovers quickly and introduces you to the younger man.

“(Y/N), this is Anakin Skywalker, my Padawan and Anakin this is Adviser (L/N).”

You tear your eyes away from Obi-Wan’s and quickly greet Anakin with a nod and small smile. Wordlessly, you walk through the door and head to Satine’s side, not before hearing the Padawan say, “On a first name basis, huh, Master?” and a small grunt following a hitting noise.

The meeting was full of high tensions, many, including Obi-Wan, disagreeing with Mandalore’s neutrality. It was always an issue when brought up, and even you saw the issues with it. The idea of staying neutral and not interfering in a war is noble but is much harder in execution and can cause more turmoil in the long run.  

As soon as the meeting is dismissed, you file out of the room, trying to avoid any more confrontation. You head to the room where you are supposed to have dinner and find Satine waiting for you.

Obi-Wan enters the room, walking with other leaders. All you had to do was get to Coruscant. Once there you can get out of here and not have to think about Obi-Wan Kenobi ever again. You zone out for most of the meal, not noticing the nervous atmosphere starting to settle over everyone or the warning Obi-Wan gives about a situation going on below decks.

You are suddenly pulled out of your own head, when you hear him yell to the guards about securing the lifts. You see the blue light of Obi-Wan’s lightsaber and Satine quickly stands up from the table, bringing you with her.

A horrifying crunching sound is heard and the doors to the lift begins to wrench open, revealing a giant spider droid. It easily knocks down the guards and clambers onto the table, quickly approaching the group of senators. Obi-Wan goes into action and severs the spider droid's legs and lands a fatal lightsaber wound to its head.

The people around you breathe a sigh of relief but soon find out that it's far from over. Miniature spider droids begin to pop out of the body of the larger one and spread out to box the group of you in. Senators begin freaking out, but you and Satine know better. Years of dealing with the pushback of the people have forced you to learn how to defend yourself. Not to mention, the year spent with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan required you to spend quite a bit of time learning to fight. You and Satine immediately pull out your deactivators and get to work killing the droids.

Obi-Wan joins the fight with his lightsaber and the two of you fall into the instinctual rhythm from all those years ago. Back to back, slowly turning, ensuring the other doesn’t get too overwhelmed by the enemy. As much as you hate being reminded of your once very close relationship, it's easier to connect to him through the ease of physical touch. You can predict his movements and fighting techniques, making it much easier to interact than dialogue. Once all, except one, of the droids are eliminated, Obi-Wan turns towards you and seems as if he has something to say but quickly stops himself and walks away to check on the others. The adrenaline coursing through your veins from the fight keeps you on edge however, even after you return to your seat.

It stays with you, even when Anakin returns to inform Obi-Wan that there is a seperatist among you. The surviving spider droid is walked around the table, a test to see who it won’t attack. When Obi-Wan reaches Tal Merrik, a sudden change in the droid's hostile behavior proves him to be a traitor.

You watch in horror as Tal grabs Satine and holds a blaster to her head. The adrenaline from the previous fight serves you well because, even before Obi-Wan has time to react to the sudden change in severity of the situation, a fallen guard’s blaster, set to stun, is in your hand and has already raised and fired at the Senator. He quickly falls, releasing Satine.

You release a shaky breath and everyone, including Obi-Wan, stares in shock at your quick save.

“T-thank you,” Satine says, obviously shaken from almost being held hostage.

You nod in acknowledgment and watch as Tal Merrik is put into custody.

For obvious reasons, all the senators decide to retire to their rooms for the rest of the night.

Exhausted emotionally and physically, you do the same and head to your room after making sure Satine arrived at hers safely. You are about to relax into your bed when you hear a knock at the door. You open it to find Obi-Wan standing there, looking rather uncomfortable. “What do you want, Obi-Wan,” you sigh, tired of hiding from your past.

“I thought that we could talk”

“You are the last person to want to talk about feelings, Obi” You say turning around and heading back into the room, silently allowing him access to your space.

He walks in and closes the door behind him and leans against the wall opposite of you.

“I thought it would be a benefit to the both of us if we just talk”

“What do you want me to say Obi-Wan?” You raise your voice, tired of his roundabout way of talking.

“Do you want me to say I’m in love with you? But you already knew that didn’t you, all those years ago, and you still left” you accuse spitefully, not believing that you could somehow still have feelings for such an emotionally constipated man.

His face contorts into one of regret and grief at the mention of his abandoning you, but you still don’t let up.

“I think it’s better if you just go, Obi Wan. It’s what you do best.” You spit out, turning around to face away from him.

You hear him push off the wall and begin to move, but instead of leaving like you told him to, he walks up to you. You sense his presence against your back and he is so close you can feel his breath gently hitting the back of your neck. He stands there and lightly touches your hand with his own, breathing you in, again resorting to physical touch when his words fail. You bask in the closeness of him, giving into the way you missed his touch.

After a few moments, you hear him sigh and pull away from you.

“Had you said the word, I would have left the Jedi Order”

With that confession, he slowly leaves and shuts the door, leaving you more confused and heartbroken than ever.

[noritoshiikamo]

driver’s license 

cause you said forever, now I drive alone passed your street [au where suna is a doctor specialized in memory removal and his last patient of the day is his ex]

pairing: suna rintarou + fem!reader genre: pain, angst, doctor!suna + patient!reader tags//warning: medical procedure of mind erasing, slight suicide ideation, alcohol abuse note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. the songs made me brawled i had to write something about it and i just so happened to finish haikyuu

“it’s odd,” he looked up from the computer screen, osamu approached him pointing to the screen, the last name listed in the appointment schedule under dr suna rintarou. please don’t say it please don’t say anything, he begged silently in his head. “she kinda has her name. haven’t heard her name in ages,” osamu shrugged, grabbing his next patient’s files, “want to get lunch later?” the doctor popped in another stick of gum, leaving before suna could even said a word.

funny that osamu said that. that is his girlfriend. he moved the cursor and clicked at the name. the birthplace, the date, her eye colour, the address and her number; it matches everything he ever memorized of her. except they are no longer together. it has been a month since their breakup.

 she’s an architect. not by choice but she likes art. she’s talented and had once held an art show during school’s open day where they met. she didn’t draw him until they started dating, but she had known some of his close friends who was the subject of her drawings. her parents disproved of her ambitious and to compromise, she agreed to take architectural instead. she stopped drawing completely and suna was the only person in japan that has the largest collection of her paintings stuffed in boxes and behind shelves.

 suna rintarou has been a doctor in inarizaki institute for 5 years now. inarizaki institute was different from others. it was the only medical institution that had successfully developed a procedure to remove unwanted memories. he’s one of the qualified doctors for said procedure. he had done the procedure multiple times now, even on his former high school friends and families but never his own girlfriend.

 is it him she’s removing from her memories?

 he didn’t remember how they broke up. maybe it’s because he was too busy. maybe it’s because she had fallen out of love with him. maybe they just couldn’t stand being in each other’s spaces, but it happened so quickly. she moved out from their apartment, returned when he left to clear out her stuff and he just threw himself back to work.

 he did remember how they met. she was the miya brothers’ neighbor. one night when he came to visit them during semester break years ago, they were in their parents’ car with a girl. suna felt like he had recognized but couldn’t think of where or when. “oi, suna,” the window rolled down and asamu called him over, “come in!” despite being weirded out, he entered the back door of the car. “we are teaching our friend how to drive; can you believe it? she’s in our university and can’t drive to save a life.”

 “shut the fuck up, atsumu or i’ll run you over,” she muttered angrily as she moved the driving gear.

 suna saw the stick going down to reverse instead down further and he immediately reached for her hand. the girl startled at the stranger’s sudden touch. “what the fuck are you d-doing?” she choked up.

 “you’re going to reverse into the wall,” he muttered bluntly, pouting his mouth to the gear. grabbing the stick through her hand, he pulled the gear into drive before letting her hand go. the light from the post shined in and he could see red flush on her face as she nodded, “oh okay, yeah d,” she muttered to herself. she started driving. she wasn’t exactly bad; she just needed a lot of practice.

 so he came over every day of his semester break and accompanied them as she practiced her driving.

 “i can drive you home?” she offered on the last night of his break before he returned to school.

 “you don’t have too.”

 “i insisted,” to which suna agreed and she glanced back at the miya brothers, “get the fuck out.” despite their disgruntlement and the it’s my mum’s car argument, she managed to kick them out. it was just two of them together. “so, i know we went to same high school and university. how come we have never crossed path before?” she questioned as she took her first turn. she memorized the roads to his home. suna shrugged as he fidgeted with the corner of the jacket’s zipper, “i played volleyball in high school.”

 she chuckled, “i’ve never watched any sport matches in high school, sorry. anyway, i’m a last year architectural student by the way. are you taking the same course as osamu?” she glanced at him with a smile. his heart skipped a beat. “y-yeah. i’m in my 5th year of medical.”

 “why not volleyball player?”

 “i got bored.”

 she let a soft exhale and shrugged, “fair enough. i took architectural to please my mother so i’m in no position to give any advice.” she slowed down in front of his house before pulling into a full stop. she pulled into parking and pulled the hand brake. she smiled and fist pumped herself, “did you see that? perfect stop!” suna didn’t expect what was going to happen next. he watched out of control as his arm reached out for her face and pulling her close. what he remembered being in control was asking her boldly whether he could kiss her.

her eyes sparkled and she smiled so widely, “yes.”

so, he did.

she moved into his apartment at the end of his graduation. she didn’t get any job for the first few months while he entered inarizaki institute as medical officer. she took commissions online and waited tables while going to a couple of interviews. he saw a decline in her motivation. when suna returned one night, he found her behind the sofa, drunk out of her mind. what spooked him wasn’t the bottles of whiskey on the floor but the stainless-steel paint scrapper she stabbed the canvas with. she could’ve hurt herself. but, putting her into therapy and pulling strings with some of her friends, she recovered, and he got her an interview. suna watched as she dreadfully shoved her portfolios and files into her bag. 

“you’ll be alright,” he reassured, bringing her a cup of coffee. she sighed and pushed her bangs back, “i don’t know, rin. i just don’t feel like getting another rejection after another and then i’ll just spiral into a-” he stopped her rambling with a kiss. he tasted like coffee; she tasted like their toothpaste. every time she tried to pull away, he pulled her back into the kiss and she could feel him laughing against her lips. “this is going to turn into something else,” she whispered between the kiss and he nodded. he was half aroused. she drank the coffee and kissed him one last time. he felt her fingers slipped from his grip. she stood by the door and waved back.

 “see you?” she beamed.

 “always.”

 suna snapped out of his own memory when an alarm blared out. he looked up past the nurses’ counter and saw a patient being pushed out of room B by a couple of nurses. he knew what goes on in that room; he helped in perfecting the procedure. osamu followed soon. he tugged the blue gloves off and shoved them into the yellow bin. “you would not believe who I met in the waiting room?” by the look of his face, osamu already got the feeling that suna already knew. osamu flipped his file and pulled out a pen. he signed the bottom of the pages and dumping it in the completed pile. “did she tell you?” suna asked.

 “about?” the other doctor asked.

 “the memories she’s erasing. did she tell you?”

 osamu shook his head and pocketed his hand in the white coat. “she asked about you. whether you’re around. i said yeah, he’s on call and she just smiled.” suna stood up and grabbed the file. he felt conflicted. osamu stopped the man before he could enter the room. “look man, I’m sorry about whatever happen between you guys and I’m in no position to judge at all.”

 suna shrugged and smiled, “it’s fine. we were just ruining each other.” the other man nodded understandingly before excusing himself. suna wanted to move but his feet felt heavy. he was glued down. room B was just a few feet away, but he couldn’t move. this is it. the end of them.

 he forced himself into the room. standing in front of the panels and monitor, separating him and her was a one-way mirror. she sat on the seat, talking to the nurses in charge. his heart hurts. she had bangs now framing her face. she’s slight thinner and no longer wore the charm bracelet he gave during their first anniversary. the nurse placed a heart-beat monitor on her thumb and attached a couple more of sensors to her brain, forehead, and neck. his monitor lightened up and spitted out the information. this is it. “doctor, she’s requesting of removal of memory from 2009 up to last month,” the nurse’s words went in his ears and out. it’s of him.

 all his own memories flashed through his mind.

 the memories of every kisses, hugs, the late nights and the earliest of days, the coffees, the spilled paints. memories of every tear he ever wiped and for ever meals she had ever cooked. memories of all the paints of him that she had gifted to him and every night she drove down his streets. for every missed calls and unread texts. the way she touched him and the way she made him felt. he felt suffocated.

 how could he ever love someone else?

 “everything is accordingly. you may press the start, doctor.”

 he looked at the flashing button and back to her. she was looking right at him. she might not see him, but she is looking straight at him and she looked so beautiful. a small smile appeared on her lips as her fingers fidgeted nervously. he felt tears prickling his eyes. his fingers brushed against the button and he slowly pressed it. 

 it took them 7 years to build this much of memories together and it took him 3 minutes to erase it clean from her mind.

 she was drowsy and she had tears running down her face. the nurses rushed in after the red light disappeared and green light beamed. the alarm rang. another memory successfully. “I’m okay, I’m okay.” he heard her from the opened door. shutting off the machine, he immediately rushed out for the door, feared that he might bumped into her and lost it. he hid his shaking hands in his pocket and gritted his teeth.

 “doctor?”

 he stopped. the world stopped spinning and he felt lightheaded. the way she called for him didn’t change, the tone and the pronunciation were the same. it was always melodious yet painful. he turned around to see her being wheelchaired out of the room by the nurse. her eyes were slightly red, and her nose were puffy. the nurse passed her a cup of water. she smiled politely, thanking her and took the cup in her hand. she took a sip, coughing at the coldness of the water down her dried throat. it’s the side effect of the procedure.

 “have we met before?” she asked, innocently.

 suna shook his head and smiled weakly, “no, we haven’t.” he turned to the nurse and nodded. before the nurse could ushered her away, she called him out again. 

 with a smile on her face, she waved goodbye, “see you, doctor?”

 “always.”

[alreadyblondenow]

Changes

Johnny x reader // SMUT, angst, fluff, virgin!reader Summary: Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself. Word count: 3k Warnings: Virginity loss, swearing, explicit mature themes, virginity kink?, corruption Note: If some words were misplaced, I apologise in advance. Half assed proofread hehe I’ll edit tomorrow im so sleepy. If you read already, Im sending you love. And thanks for putting up with shit hihi

You remember being a good daughter during high school. How you manage to have a high GPA just so you could make your parents proud and go to a nice college.

And when you got in to your dream college, you remember doing everything right during your those four years. Studied harder than ever and almost broke your back from staying up in front of your computer to finish your thesis. It was always about doing the right thing, staying on track, keeping out from trouble, always so sure what to do next after accomplishing the another. Until you met Johnny. It was the first time you felt so dumb and stupidly in love.

“Baby its not even in yet” you were sure that Johnny’s cock was inside already because the stretch hurts. It hurts so bad you can’t breath properly. “It fucking hurts.”

Johnny let out a giggle, kissing your breast while being half inside you, “Baby it supposed to hurt you’re a virgin” he’s clearly enjoying teasing you underneath him and savouring the tightness of your pussy for the first time. “My virgin”  kissing you a little too sweet and soft even though he’s cock is making your eyes teary. He pushes in again slowly with your consent and fucks you slow, then fast when he sees you relaxing already.

“Johnny wait - it really fucking hurts baby” you pant asking for more time. “Okay okay, Im going slow again, sorry. I thought-“ and he fucks you slowly again, kissing your neck and collarbones.

When the pain was gone, Johnny feels good inside you. You let a string of curses, kissing and bitting him almost covering his face with spit. With a steady and deep pace you were slowly getting why people love having sex. “Still hurting?” Johnny already knew the answer but he wanted to hear it from you. “Not anymore? Hmm. My virgin girlfriend?” you hum at the pet name he calls you. What a weird thing to call you, you thought. But you love it.

Drowned by lust and pleasure, you didn’t notice Johnny was picking up his pace. He’s to experienced for a virgin like you. The both of you can only groan and moan from the feeling you give each other. Exchanging kisses and bites to show affection and appreciation.

“Ugh you’re almost there now aren’t you?” Johnny asked in between fucking you faster than before but not enough to wreck you. “Feels good now yeah?” he grabs you legs and puts it closer to your chest for a new angle.

“Baby - You fuck good” you gulp, trying to help yourself speak while he fucks you with the new angle. “Is this what I’m missing for months now?” and theres Johnny’s smirk again

“Im afraid so baby, Im afraid so”

You whine when he slowed down his pace. “Do you mind if I play a bit?” you didn’t gave him an answer but Johnny proceeds anyway. He knew you’re at the edge already and being the experienced one between the two of you, he wants to have fun and make the best out of this moment. Unexpectedly you earned long and hard stripes of lick on your cunt that made you closed your eyes shut and yell at him.

Johnny is so amused seeing you so fucked up for the first time. Without a warning he pushes inside you again and fucks you with the same pace as earlier. He noticed your eyebrows furrow and your lips parted letting out sounds so sweet for him.

“I think I found you sweet spot baby” you couldn’t agree more.

“Am I fucking you good huh? Am I fucking you right?” only gasps and moans comes out from your mouth.

“You have to show me baby. You have to cum” but that’s the problem, you knew you have this weird feeling in your abdomen that you somehow can’t let go off. Finally having the strength to talk back, latching on his arms and moving you head from side to side, “I’m trying to let go baby - fuck give me time” but being the dominant that he says he is, Johnny is losing patience and you don’t know what to do. “Aren’t I fucking you good? Why aren’t you cuming yet huh?”

And just as you though the knotting in your abdomen couldn’t get worse, it did. But this time you knew what you want. “Fuck baby! More” to your surprise, he didn’t fucked you faster but he fucked you harder instead. You didn’t know it will give you the same satisfaction that you were craving for just seconds ago before he delivered hard thrusts. He felt your pussy clench and that’s enough for Johnny to make the both of you cum together.

“There you go. You like it rough huh okay I’ll do better next round” Thrust. Thrust. Thrust. You can feel his hips slapping on your skin and you finally felt that sweet release that he was asking for. You cum before him and he chased his orgasm by fucking you faster, he didn’t know that made you overstimulated. “You’re okay, sshh. You’re okay.”

He removes the condom and helped you come down your high. Massaging everything he can as a form of apology, “sorry for being rough” he kisses your shoulders and you encircled your arms around him.

“I got a boyfriend that can fuck that good?” forcing a smile trying to fight the exhaustion. Johnny blushed by your sudden compliment making his eyes small. When you pull him for a hug, his body is warm and sweaty but he surprisingly still smells good. That day you asked Johnny to keep on fucking you until you learn how to be confident on having sex with him. For you, Johnny was the prefect person to help you say goodbye to your innocence.

Every single part of you changed when you met Johnny. He’s a sweet responsible man who takes care of you even though he’s completely aware that you can take care of yourself. Even so, you let him because he gives you warmth that you can’t give yourself.

He completely changed your uptight personality and introduced you to thrills and excitement. You never felt so alive after giving up that perfect image of you that you try to maintain.

He made you crave for pleasure and lust that he’s willing to give as long as you let him love you unconditionally and you give the same in return. Of course you love Johnny. He taught you that love shouldn’t always be perfect and that it could be a lot more complicated sometimes. Which is true. You always thought love should be perfect and it’s always about marriage and having kids. And you want none of that. For the first time in your life you don’t want to follow the life your parents want you to have.

-

Johnny is balls deep in your pussy, panties to the side and fucking you good on the dinner table. The man couldn’t get his hands off of your perfect figure. The room is full of moans and the sound of the table rocking back and forth from Johnny’s thrusts.

“What if we get married?” Johnny blurted out.

That doesn’t sound right. “Ah!” still catching your breath gasping and wanting more but what you heard made your head dizzy. “Johnny, I need you to get off”

“What- why? What did I do?” you got down from the table grabbing your satin shorts on the floor, wearing it again. You see Johnny putting his cock back in his boxer briefs and putting his pants on. “Is it because of what I just said? Im sorry I didn’t mean to. Lets just forget about it okay?”

“The fact that you already considered it Johnny... you will continuously think about it then someday you’re going to ask me again and again” you crossed your arms and sat across the table.

“What?” he scoffed.  “Didn’t you think that someday we will get married? Didn’t that crossed your mind! Isn’t that the goal? Isn’t that our goal!”

“Don’t shout. And no. Thats the last thing that I want. And see, thats what Ive been saying. Once you thought about the M word, you will never stop thinking about it ever again” there was a few minutes of silence, you knew you’re gonna tear up the moment you talk again. But he has to hear your part, he has the right to know what you want.

“Getting... “ your voice already cracked. “Having kids, settling down all of it. You don’t know how those things work Johnny, they’re suffocating. The weight of the responsibilities is unbearable”

“So you’re saying a life with me is something bad that will change your life completely” he wanted you to look at him but you can’t,  “So what? Were just gonna fuck like teenagers until were 40? You sound like you’re going to leave me one day.”

“I  don’t know. Its just… its not me Johnny”

“Or maybe you just don’t love me enough y/n” he pushed his hair back leaning on the table and staring you down with cold eyes, “clearly were not on the same page anymore.”

“Thats not true”

He doesn’t say a word. He gets his jacket and kissed you on your cheeks. You can’t watch him leave because it will hurt you so much. But when you heard your door close gently, suddenly you felt so weak and cold.  

The next day you asked him to go grab breakfast with you before you two go to work. Not knowing how to fix this, you still tried to reach up to him. Maybe you just got lucky that he didn’t want to pry on what happened yesterday and everything seemed fine during breakfast. From there on Johnny stopped talking about what he wants to happen in the future. Not bringing up the M word again, he’s not asking you random baby names anymore, no more IKEA window shopping for your future shared apartment. And quite frankly you miss it. Without Johnny being hopeful like that, your relationship seems dull.

You try to bring the old him back by asking him to go IKEA shopping with you. He agreed but he was quiet the whole time. He just talks whenever you asked him something.

You caught him looking at this couple who was checking furnitures together, his eyes full of envy and you can see right through him.

When you got home, you placed the bags on top of the table and went straight to the bathroom to cry. Constantly blaming yourself for not wanting the same thing as Johnny wants and for ruining the relationship you have. You grabbed a towel from the basket and you bit it to filter your screams. If you thought he didn’t hear any of your sobs and screams, you’re wrong. He’s waiting for you on the other side of the door crying his eyes out too.

Knowing that he’s outside waiting for you, you tried forming your words and forcing yourself to speak. “B-baby, I just cant provide the things you want in life anymore. You’re hurt, Im hurt. And we cant fix it because we don’t want the same things anymore. I can’t force myself to marry you and have kids when I don’t want to. And You don’t have to stop wanting and dreaming to have a family just because I don’t want to. Johnny, I think this is where it ends” You told him he could leave you and there will be no hard feelings. The breakup was somehow peaceful, no screaming and yelling like what you thought it would be. Maybe you just love each other that much but it’s still not enough.

After breaking up with Johnny, you went back home and help your sister plan her wedding. Although the two of you has very different views when it comes to marriage, you loved seeing your sister happy and excited to be married. During the wedding your sister shared the news that she’s already seven weeks pregnant and you couldn’t be more happier and the day became even more eventful because of the little angel. That day, you saw your sister’s husband tear up while she was walking down the aisle. That day, you heard your sister’s husband shout “I’m going to be a father!” You can’t help but think about how happy Johnny must be if he become someone’s husband and how happy he could be when he finally become a father.

After months and months of waiting, you finally met the little angel. An angel that changed your life. You don’t know what happened to you but meeting the little angel changed your perception in life. Yours sister’s baby was a miracle to many people, you included. Seeing how happy your sister and her husband with the baby made you realise that bringing life into this world can give you genuine happiness. You loved your niece unconditionally, showered him with every love you could possibly give and turns out you’re good with kids.

Another wedding is bound to happen, a little rushed and unplanned but you do know the couple loved each other. You knew you could possibly ran into Johnny during the wedding and you did. He looked fine as always, almost made every bridesmaid craving for him.

“All right! calling all the single ladies, it’s time for bride to throw her bouquet”

You were sure you’re sitting far from the bride not bothering to even get up and participate. You were also sure that you will never going to catch it even if you made an effort. But somehow you wanted it to come to you, near enough and catch it with both arms for Johnny. And it did. It landed on your lap. You scoffed looking at the beautiful flowers, smelling it to make it less awkward.

When the party started, everyone was almost drunk enough to care whose wedding it is. Laughter and giggles everywhere. You were alone, enjoying a whole bottle of champagne all by yourself.

“Mind if you tell who’s the lucky guy?” not turning your head back to look, that voice is familiar enough for you to know who it is.

“So happy to see you here Johnny” instead of giving him a hug you gave him a toast. Looking at each other’s fingers. Johnny checks your finger for any sign of an engagement ring and you checking his fingers for a wedding ring.

None. You answered his question to make the situation less awkward, “Just got lucky” you let out a small giggle. “The bride pretty much threw it far. And it just so happens that I’m sitting far enough for it to land on my lap” you both laughed, happy that you’re able to see each other again. Happy to have the chance to see each other’s eyes again without tears in it.

“How about you? Who’s the lucky girl?” Johnny laughs and downed the remaining alcohol from his glass.  

“Still you”

You didn’t expect him to be straightforward but you’re happy about it. That night Johnny brought you to his new apartment and you had sex on his couch, on his bedroom floor and on his bed. The next morning you were welcomed back to Johnny’s life again with all smiles, kisses and a lot of orgasms he almost ran out of condoms.

For the past couple of months you and Johnny were busy catching up with all the years you spent apart and slowly building a more established relationship. Your life couldn’t be more happier.

“Baby Im home. And Im tired” you heard him drop his keys at the table near the door, of course he made his way to the kitchen first. Feeling his arms encircled around your waist, “I’m almost done with making dinner” you gave him a kiss and he made his way to the living room. Then you heard him shout, you slowly put down the hot pot and hurried yourself to Johnny.

“Oh my gosh! Who are you?” Johnny is pointing at your sister’s baby crawling around in the living room, playing with his toys.

“Gosh you scared me. T-thats my sister’s baby. I need to babysit tonight hope you don’t mind”

“Oh! I don’t mind… Come here you little ball of sunshine, lets play” and Johnny came crawling around the living room trying to catch the energetic baby. You giggle at the sight of Johnny crawling around. He’s so tall and big.

“Johnny, I thought you’re tired…”

“Nope. Not anymore”

When you’re both in bed with the baby in between the two of you, Johnny cant stop looking after the kid, humming lullabies and patting his small legs making him sleep deeper.  

“Johnny a lot of things changed when we were apart. I started to love kids and actually looking forward on having one someday” you looked at him,  “or some…” you whispered carefully not to wake the sleeping angel. He chuckled lightly, pushing his hair back “I know” he whispered back. He pats his side of the bed, gesturing you to lay beside him. He puts a pillow next to the sleeping kid so he can still roll around the bed safely.

Johnny pulled you close to him, hovering his leg on yours. He feels warm as always. “For how long?” you asked out of curiosity. “since we got back together. You constantly talk about having our own house someday whenever we watch lifestyle network. And, you constantly ask me to fuck you raw” You were both trying not to laugh so hard cover each others mouths. Before you two close your eyes, Johnny told you he liked the idea of the two of you whispering “Whispering is good. Can’t wait to have more whispering moments with you.”

The next day your sister came in really early, Johnny was still sleeping. You told her how he took care of the baby and that he was the one who babysit the whole night playing and taking care of him. “tell Johnny I said thank you. And please, make your own baby” you can’t believe your sister just told you to have your own baby already. “Okay okay. Get out already before you wake him up. I love you, drive safe”

When you came back to the bed with Johnny, he kissed you good morning completely aware that the baby is already with your sister. “I’m gonna miss the little guy” eyes still closed he’s still whispering so you played along. “Well, we can always make our own little guy” and that woke Johnny up hovering you and showering you with wet kisses. He’s so heavy but you’d rather let him crush you than being away from him again.

“Just so you know I want three kids. Two boys one girl” he says with a big smile while drawing circles around your tummy. “You do realise thats three different educations…” he chuckled and showered your exposed tummy with kisses making you tickle and whine.

“I  know, thats why were gonna save like crazy before having them” he finally kissed you on the lips.

“I like that plan Johnny Seo you sound even more sexier. Lets be sure everything is fine and settled when they enter this world”

“And completely change our lives” he can’t stop rubbing your tummy, “I love how we’re compromising now. I never want to yell at you ever again. Not now, not ever. Definitely not in front our children”

You catch his hand and interlock your fingers with his, “I never want that to happen too baby” Johnny came closer to you, kissing you deeply. “Baby why are we whispering?”

you feel his hands creep inside your shorts, teasing your clothed clit and you let out a soft moan, biting his lips. “I don’t know... practicing to be quiet maybe?” He chuckles in between kisses.

“You going to marry me now?”

“Yes Johnny, I will”

................................................. Masterlist

[valkyriesryde]

Together

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: You've got some news but are too scared to tell Bucky but he’ll find out one way or another

Warnings: pregnancy, fluff, angst?, yeet

Word Count: 2kish

A/N: This one was requested by @cleocc and I’m so glad I could do this one for you hun I’m so sorry it took a while. Thank you for always being so supportive of me and amazing <3 also wow im uh back? 

~~~

Well...fuck.

You sat on the couch, with your legs tucked up so your chin rested on your knees. You watched Peter, Bucky and Sam playing Mario Kart on the TV, they were laughing and joking, pushing each other and trying to distract one another from the game.

Every now and then Bucky turned and smiled at you, making sure you were all good and not feeling left out by the boys. You gave him a tight smile and ran your fingers over his back and he turned back to the tv. But your face dropped as soon as he turned away and you sank back into yourself. Fuck.

"Ahh dammit," Sam groaned and threw his controller onto the seat next to him while Peter and Bucky both laughed as they already crossed the finish line ahead of him.

Slowly and quietly you got up from your seat and started to walk out of the room, praying that Bucky didn't think anything of it or notice at all.

"Baby, you all good? Where ya going?"

"Just tired, gonna go lie down," you told him.

There was no reason for you to not tell him. It’s not like it was a new relationship, the two of you had been together for years. It’s not like you hadn’t talked about it. In fact you’d both decided, if it were to happen, it happened and that would be amazing. Neither of you knew if it was even possible. Bucky wasn’t sure if after everything that happened his bits still worked as they should. But when you talked about it you both decided that you would leave it up to the universe. Now the universe had spoken and you couldn’t even bring yourself to tell him. You couldn’t even say it outloud.

“Hey baby girl.” Bucky cooed as he crawled onto the bed and pulled back the cover that you hid under. “Wanna cuddle?” he smiles and nudges his nose into your cheek. You nod your head and open your arms and Bucky immediately cuddles into you, scooting under the covers and holding you close. “Tell me what’s up when you’re ready okay?”

Bucky was always good like that. He knew that it took time for you to make sense of what you were feeling. It always took you some time to be brave enough to say it outloud and Bucky knew that. Whenever you got down or something was bothering you he was always close by for you to cuddle into until you were ready. He got worried, sure but you always told him...right? Not that it hadn’t been two weeks and you hadn’t told him anything yet and he’s totally not worried out of his mind...nope.

Two weeks, you’d kept quiet. Two and a half weeks total since you found out. Bucky stood behind you as you worked, tapping your pen as you read through reports. You hadn’t noticed him yet and he took the opportunity to observe you and see if he could figure out what was going on for himself. You weren’t any more stressed over work than usual and you hadn’t really snapped at anyone which meant no one in particular was getting on your nerves. In fact, the only person you’d been weird with was him. You were distant at the best of times, at the worst you seemed to be straight up avoiding any alone time with him. You’d go to bed early to avoid him in your apartment.

Bucky was losing his mind, you’d never been like this before. You’d always been able to talk to him so what was going on?

You’re lying next to him fast asleep and he’s staring at the ceiling with tears in eyes thinking that maybe the end is coming? Maybe she’s finally at her breaking point and this is it. She’s done with him; she just doesn’t know how to tell him yet. Then your phone lights up and it catches his eye on your bedside table. The notification isn’t anything important. Just a reminder about a meeting you have with Natasha the next morning. But it’s the notification underneath it that makes Bucky reach over you and pick up your phone.

Kindle: What to Expect When You’re Expecting has fully downloaded

Bucky falls back into his pillow and peers and you from the corner of his eye before looking at the lock screen again. He unlocks your phone, not like either of you didn’t know each other’s passwords, and opens the app in question.

The more Bucky looks at your current reading list the more confused he gets;

The Mama Neutral Week-by-Week Guide to Pregnancy and Childbirth

50 Things to Do Before You Deliver: The First Time Moms Pregnancy Guide

Pregnancy Notes: Before, During & After

The list goes on, there must be at least ten different expectant pregnancy books and some of the older ones are at least halfway through…the pin drops and Bucky almost chokes on air as he’s grabbing for his own phone and opening his own version of the app and downloading the exact books you have. Then your phone is placed exactly where he found it, he buries his face into your shoulder for a second with a beaming smile and kisses your shoulder blade.

“Silly girl,” he whispers against your skin before lying back down and opening the first book.

Bucky gets no sleep that night. When he comes into the kitchen at 6am to run with Steve and Sam he’s got bags under his eyes as bad as when his nights were tormented with nightmares and Steve’s stomach would have dropped if it not for the spring in Bucky’s step or the cheerful “good morning punk” he offered him.

“I think he’s finally gone mad…” Sam stood beside Steve as they watched Bucky whistle to himself as he tied his laces.

“I really thought him being with Y/N meant we didn’t have to worry about that anymore…” Steve scratched at his beard.

“You two idiots know I can hear you right?” Bucky stood straight and though his voice was teasing he continued to smile brightly at them and make for the door to start their run.

“You going to tell us what’s got you so happy then Buck?” Steve called out after him, Bucky turned and jogged backwards as he held out his arms.

“Nothing’s confirmed yet!”

“It’s gotta be the no sleep he really has gone mad.”

~~~~~~~

When Bucky returned to his room he could hear the shower going and you singing along to the music that played through the bathroom. He sat at the edge of the bed, toeing his shoes off and stripping the sweat covered shirt from his back, using it to wipe the sweat from his brow and chest.

“Looks like you had a good run,” you stepped out with a towel wrapped around you and offered Bucky a small smile, making your way to your dresser to get dressed.

Bucky watched closely as you started to get dressed. He paid close attention to the way you carried yourself, how careful you were with your skin and your body as you pulled a t-shirt over your head. How could he have been so unaware before?

“Com’ere” he whispered but you heard him clear as day and pulled out a pair of jeans.

“In a second,” you mumbled but Bucky wasn’t having any of it.

“Darling come here...please,” he pleaded for you and you dropped the jeans back into the drawer and walked over to him. Bucky held out his arms until he could reach your hips and pulled you to stand between his legs. His fingers brushed underneath your t-shirt and over the fabric of your underwear up to the skin of your waist and back down. “Good morning my lovely,” he delighted as his hands went to the back of your thighs and he pulled you as close as you could get while still standing, his eyes looking up at your filled with love.

“Morning,” this was probably the most intimate the two of you had been in the last couple of weeks aside from sleeping next to each other and god you missed it. Goosebumps followed his touch and your body twitched to get closer to him until there wasn’t a part of you that wasn’t touching. You missed him and it was all your own doing.

“You know I love you?” He pulled at the back of your knees until you were situated on his lap and he held your hips while your hands brushed against his chest as if he knew exactly what he wanted. He wanted it too. “Love you more than I’ll ever be able to tell ya.” His voice was quiet and as his arms snaked around your back it got softer. “Really don’t like it when you close off from me because it absolutely terrifies me babydoll but it’s okay. It’s okay you can tell me whenever you’re ready, I just need you to know that I love you and I’m not gonna be going anywhere anytime soon alright?”

You choked back a sob as you nodded your head and tried to blink back the tears, his grip around you tightened and your hands held onto his shoulders. Bucky smiled through his own tears and leaned his forehead against yours.

“It’s okay baby. I know, it’s okay.”

“I’m so scared,” you whimpered and Bucky simply nodded his head. He didn’t want to think about what you were scared of whether it be him or his reaction or the situation in its entirety because he knew he had to be strong for you and he was going to do just that.

“I know I know, it’s okay. I got you, you’re not alone. We do this together.”

You hold onto him for dear life, nodding your head because you can’t quite bring yourself to speak anymore knowing that it would come out as a series of sobs and gibberish. Bucky holds you back just as tight and he wants to outright ask you to say it outloud because he needs to hear it but he doesn't want to scare you off when he’s only just got you back. So he falls back onto the bed with you still in his arms and you squeal as you fall.

“I’m so happy,” he breathes out without thinking. Before he can clamp his mouth shut and take back anything he’s said you’re sitting up and wiping the water from your face.

“You are?”

“‘Course I am, I’m gonna be a dad,” he whispers happily and you can’t help but beam at him and nod.

“You’re gonna be a dad.” And his grin grows until he’s giving you a toothy smile and pulling you back into him, rolling over and kissing every inch of your face. “You can’t tell yet!” You stop and he pulls back, looking at you confused, “we have to wait until twelve weeks before we can tell people.”

“How far along are you now?”

“About three weeks.”

“Darling...I’m being completely serious,” his face drops and he combs back the hair from your face. “I really do not think I’ll be able to keep my mouth shut for that long…”

“You’re going to have to baby,” you giggle, everything feels so much lighter now that he knows. You were silly to be so scared.

“I will...for you,” he shimmies down your body and lifts your t-shirt to uncover your stomach, “and you,” and then he's giving you raspberry kisses while you laugh loudly and try and push him away.

~~~~~~

“Y/N OH MY GOSH CONGRATULATIONS!!” Clint runs up to you and envelops you in a giant hug a couple days later in the kitchen while you cook lunch for yourself and everyone else. “This is AWESOME! Gonna spoil that kid rotten!”

You look to Bucky who sits at the kitchen island and if looks could kill he’d be a pile of ash on the ground.

“Babe…” he starts.

“Buck.”

“I just told Steve, he’s my best friend, I couldn’t keep it from him.” He points to Steve who starts to sink in his seat and your glare moves from Bucky to Steve.

“I just told Tony, he deserves to know in case something were to happen.” Steve shrugs as Tony stands behind him sipping a mug of coffee.

“...I told many, many people.”

~~~

Thank you for reading and I’m so glad you enjoyed it!

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[scarletwidowaf]

Ghost Of You - chapter 3

A/N: i think that at this point, me being to lazy and tired to fix grammer and mistakes became a part of the story. Also im very sorry for the angst, im kinda winging it but hopefully stuff will be less painful soon 😅

The beautiful art is by the incredible @chloroformcandles ! Go check her works! Im honestly obsessed and even used her art as icons on both of my scarletwidow blogs.

Warnings: angst of course, mention of death (obviously)

Words count: 1391

ao3  *  wattpad  *  Tumblr story index

------------------------

Ever since wanda joined the avengers she was trained in hand to hand combat.

Its not like she actually needed it, she always thought to herself and said it multiple times to the other female avenger and trainer, but Natasha always raised her eyebrow at her and smiled cockily at her in return.

One of wanda's favorite training sessions with natasha was when they were on the run. Steve Insisted they'll keep training as much as they can, even more than they used to as avengers. Natasha agreed, wanda did too but it didn't stop her from complaining every morning when the two women were already panting before the crack of down.

"You're too slow"

Natasha said, her hands holding the younger girl down on training mat.

Wanda tried to push the shorter woman down but with no use, natasha was small yet her grip was strong and her steady firm.

It was amazing that even when they were training and sweaty natasha still managed to look painfully hot. The older women smelled like vanilla and sweat and wanda had to admit that it wasn't a bad combination.

"Well its 5 am natasha, I'm barley even awake" she joked,.

wanda could see natasha holding back her smile. It was funny, really, that Natasha could hold the best poker face and go undercover without a hiss and without ever getting caught, but couldn't contain her smile when it comes to the younger woman.

"So lets make a deal, maximoff. If you can pin me down to the mat i will get you the coffee you like from the coffee down the street"

Wanda smiled.

"They do have a great coffee.. " she said. Natasha agreed, she liked their coffee and she liked the satisfied smile on wanda's face after she takes the first sip.

"I still don't see a reason for us to train combat" wanda grumble out. Natasha smiled at her and wanda's heart skipped a bit.

The younger woman knew she was getting into a dangerous zone with Natasha, but she couldn't help herself.

"I just gave you a reason maximoff. Im 5'3. If you cant take me down what would you do with stronger, bigger, rougher opponent?"

Natasha raised her eyebrow and moved to get up.

Natasha stood and held her hand out to the younger woman.

"You say that wasn't rough, romanoff?" Wanda asked faking annoyance.

"Barely" natasha smirked.

Wanda took the older girl's hand and got up as well.

"I will get that coffee" wanda said.

"Bring it on"

Natasha's smile was dangerously hot.

That was the problem about Natasha Romanoff, wanda knew that no mattar when, or at what situation, the older woman's smile will have a power over her, just like Natasha had.

And that was the only thought that crossed in wanda's mind when the two sat on wanda's bed in her crappy London apartment.

Its been a week since natasha came back and the two did their best to try and understand the circumstances they were in.

The good news were, that Natasha could come and go as she pleases.

wanda didn't knew where she was going when she left and natasha didn't say.

It could be counted as bad news as well.

At the few times when the two womem got frustrated, natasha would've leave, wanda would've cry and then natasha would come back and sit next to her, as close as she can.

The truth was that wanda missed being close to natasha, she was happy to have her around, to talk to her and hear her voice, but she missed her touch and her smell and having her around was getting painful.

Sometimes Wanda wanted to hug her and sob about everything.

And natasha wanted to be able to hold her, and hold her hand.

They missed each other, and sometimes it was too hard for them to be so close to each other without being able to touch.

"I went trough Agetha's book again" wanda finally said. Natasha put down the book she was reading, another novel wanda never heard of.

Wanda couldn't help her envy, because the book was something natasha could touch and hold and wanda wasn't.

"And?" Natasha said.

"I found something but i dont know how to perform it."

She confessed.

"Maybe we can go to someone who might know. Strange maybe?" Natasha said

"I dont think thats a good idea.. Ive been avoiding the other avengers ever since westview" she admitted

"Was it that bad?"

"Its just complicated. I brought vision back for awhile, well, kind of"

Natasha looked at her quietly encouraging her to continue

"I could bring him back but only there, i build these perfect life in there, nat, i had a family and a house and everything was so normal even when it wasn't"

"Why wasn't it perfect?"

"Because as real as it felt it was all a big lie. An illusion"

"Were you happy?"

Natasha asked.

"Yes" wanda admitted. Natasha smiled sadly.

"Then in was worth it, in a way" the older girl said.

"You weren't there" wanda said after a few moments.

The younger woman got up from bed. She wasn't able to sit still or look into the other woman eyes.

"I guess a part of your consensus knew that if I would've been there it wouldn't be perfect" natasha said sadly and got up as well.

"I doubt that there's any reality, fake or real one, that I wouldn't have been in love with you" natasha continued and wanda felt wetness on her cheeks. She was crying.

Natasha stood a few steps away from wanda, she didn't want to get too close and overwhelm the crying girl, but she couldn't stay away neither.

"I'm sorry nat"

"For what?" Natasha asked confused.

"For bringing you back. I just missed you so much and i was selfish.

I guess you were wrong natasha, I'm not a good person"

"I missed you too, every single day in the last 5 years."

Wanda looked up. Her eyes catching natasha's red ones.

Both women were crying. Natasha's cheeks were stained and her eyes were red, yet she was holding herself together pretty well. Probably as as a result of years of holding things inside and making her feelings.

"I blamed clint, you know?" Wanda confessed.

"We had a fight after i found out you were dead. I blamed him for not keeping you safe, and then left. I didn't spoke to him since then"

Wanda catch a glimpse of Natasha's book on the bed and wondered if the lead characters got their happy ending.

Natasha sigh, her hands massaging her temple.

"I dont know what they told you wanda. But i chose to jump. I could've let clint jump"

"You're lying, clint said-"

"That i had no other choice? Knowing him figured its better you wont know that, so you wouldn't be mad at me for doing that."

the two women were so close to each other that wanda could imagine natasha's hot breath and vanilla scent.

Natasha could see the small freckles on the younger girl's nose.

"You want to know why I don't deserve to go to heaven? Wanda" Natasha asked.

Wanda wiped her own tears.

"Why?"

"I'm selfish.

I could've let clint jump but i knew that I couldn't live with the burden and the pain so i left him to live with it instead.

I could let the world stay how it was after the snap, but I didn't. Not because I'm the honorable person you think i am, but because of you. I wanted you to get the life that you deserve."

Natasha smiled bitterly and gestured with her hands to the room they were in.

Wanda wanted to respond but couldn't. Her throat was dry and her head was aching.

"I should go" natasha said and before wanda could protest the older woman was gone and she was alone again.

After a few minutes of crying the witch took a few breath to calm herself down, before she went to her nightstand and took out a disposable cell phone.

"You're not selfish natasha, i am." She whispered.

The young witch typed a few digits and held the phone to her ear.

After a few rings she heard a familiar voice.

"Hey agnes, i need your help"

[moonlit-imagines]

1950

Wanda Maximoff x reader

warnings: talks abt wanda’s mental health

a/n: this was written pre-wandavision release so im actually completely bullshitting the storyline...this turned into really poorly written angst really quickly

prompt: @the-radio-star: “OMG for the song event can I request Wanda Maximoff (MCU) with 1950 - King Princess”//1950 - King Princess

One thousand nine hundred eighty-nine days. That’s how long you waited for this moment. To stand in front of Wanda and see her beautiful face again. To hold her hands and pull her close to you. It was at that moment you realized that if you had to, you would wait an entire lifetime for her to return to you.

“Did you miss me?” Wanda coyly asked, watching as you fought tearing up. You’d be a liar if you denied it.

“Maybe just a little.” You honestly couldn’t stop thinking about her when she was gone. You didn’t think it’d be possible to see her again.

“Glad to know someone did.” She smiled slightly, but you knew there was something on her mind. She had lost people, too. Only her people...they weren’t coming back.

The thing is, she’d mourn for a while, but not forever. You’d be there with her through it all, though. Because you loved her, and not just as a friend. You and Wanda had been back and forth for a while, you just never caught each other at the right times. But now you were sitting side by side on a bench in the park and she was smiling, really smiling. It’s like she’d healed from all that had hurt her in the past, you were glad to be able to witness that.

“You look really pretty today, Wanda.” She heard you compliment, making her face turn pink.

“You’re just being nice.” Wanda rolled her eyes with a chuckle, but she knew you weren’t kidding. You wished that it could have stayed this simple, but your lives...they just didn’t work like that. So that leads us into our next part of the story, just shortly after.

—————

“Mx. l/n! You can’t go in there!” An agent camped outside the restricted town called to you as you marched right in, there was nothing that would stop you from saving her from herself. You may be the only person that could.

Once you were inside, you took a gander around at the puzzling scenery. It’s like you stepped right into a portal to 1950, and there you saw one house that looked more detailed than the rest, there she is.

You didn’t know what kind of state of mind she may be in, but this couldn’t go on for much longer, so you walked right up to her door and gave a less-than-gentle knock. There was an almost immediate answer.

“Hello? Can I help you?” Wanda asked with a peculiar tone, her accent was completely gone. And...she didn’t recognize you. It was almost heartbreaking.

“Wanda?” Your voice shook, but Wanda stayed upbeat as ever with a smile practically glued to her face.

“That’s my name, don’t wear it out!” She joked, every part of this got more and more uncomfortable. You should have listened to that agent.

“Who’s at the door, Wanda?” You heard a familiar voice from inside.

“What’s your name, sweetie?” Wanda tilted her head gently and you whispered your answer by accident. She thought you were odd, but she couldn’t imagine how you felt. “It’s y/n, honey!”

“Do we know an ‘y/n?’” He asked yet another question.

“We do now! Come on in.” The stranger of a friend dragged you inside and...wow. You just wanted to know how you could help her at this point. This entire reality, it couldn’t bring anything good. “So, y/n, tell us more about yourself.”

“I, uh...” You were focusing on Vision, who was sitting on a recliner reading his newspaper. He was supposed to be dead. Oh, Wanda, what have you done? Wait—Did something in the room just change? “You don’t remember me?”

“Remember you? Why, I’ve never seen you in my life.” Vision commented, folding his newspaper and sitting up straight. Now the two of them were uncomfortably staring at you. “Who are you?” How could you answer this question without hurting Wanda’s mental state. You looked at her clock and saw that it was now ticking one way, and then the other. They were still staring and you were holding onto your breath. Good god.

“Well, we haven’t got all day. Me and Vision have dinner plans!” Wanda finally broke her deafening silence and clapped her hands together. Maybe...maybe you should snap her out of this. You awkwardly contemplated it for another few moments while the fictional couple stared, observing the surroundings of the 1950s-themed home. Is this really what she wanted?

“This...this isn’t real, Wanda.” You finally told her, but she laughed. She just laughed. “I’m serious. All of this around us? You made it up.”

“That’s preposterous!” Vision decided to interject as he began reading the paper again, crossing one leg over another. But Wanda hadn’t yet commented on your world-breaking news.

“Wanda? You’ve got to believe me. Think about it for a minute. What do you remember from the past few days?” You tried to reason with her, but instead looked down to see yourself wearing 50s attire. She wasn’t going to give up this reality so easily. You decided to move onto the couch her hand been sitting on. “This is wrong. All wrong.”

“Why is it wrong?” She furrowed her eyebrows and watched you reach for her hand. Vision was frozen in time right then and there, almost like Cap himself.

“I care about you...so, so much.” You admitted as you squeezed her soft hands. “That’s why I need you to escape this fantasy and come back to the real world.” Wanda was starting to gain some clarity, but not enough to fully give up her dream life, even if you were a tad disappointed that Vision was there and you weren’t. Grief shows itself in funny ways, I guess. “Listen, Wanda. I didn’t want to have to do this, but...I love you too much to see you like this. A lie isn’t going to fix everything.” You reluctantly used her powers against her, a lovely ability you had. Mimicking her powers came at a cost, though.

“What—what are you doing?” Wanda asked as her world came undone. Her powers overwhelmed you greatly, but this was your last resort.

“I’m helping, Wanda. You’ll thank me later.” You grunted as you tried to concentrate. She was at a loss for words, actually. You watched as she ran outside and saw it all crumble to pieces. You hated hearing her cry, but the sooner you stopped this, the easier it might be.

You were weak now. It was hard to handle all of what she posessed when you weren’t quite used to it. It was time to find Wanda, but that wasn’t very hard. She was sitting in the middle of the road sobbing, but why exactly was she? There were so many reasons she may have.

“Are you okay?” You foolishly questioned. She didn’t answer at first...you sat beside her. You needed to sit, you were exhausted.

“I’m sorry.” She told you. “I’m a mess.”

“Don’t...” You placed your hand on her shoulder. “I know why you did it. It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay, though. I keep making these awful mistakes.” Wanda argued, biting her lip as more tears flowed down her cheeks and into her lap. Her jeans began catching them all. “It was wrong, perverted. I created a fake Vision, I took over a town, I went back in time. I created a false reality for myself and let it consume me, I couldn’t even remember who you were and you...you’re all that matters to me.”

“I—” This was such a complex situation, becoming an Avenger never prepared you for this. You decided a hug might be best right about now. No words for a minute. So you just pulled Wanda closer to you and let her cry on your shoulder. “I’m here for you Wanda.”

“I know you are. I’ve always known that.” She sniffled, still crying just a bit. And she was finally able to look you in the eye. “We’ve just never caught each other at the right time, have we?” Wanda asked, pulling your hand towards her lips to give your knuckles a light kiss.

“It seems that way.�� You sighed. “But I don’t think I’ve ever stopped loving you.”

“I need to get on with my life, don’t I?” Her half-shrug was accompanied by the shake of her head.

“You need to take your time with it, Wanda.” You looked up at the cloudy sky and felt warmth on your cheek. A kiss.

“Maybe a little longer. But I think our time is soon.” She looked up with you and birds began to fly by, it was a bit peaceful.

“I just hope you’ll be happy with me.” You admitted, turning your head over to her. Your soon-to-be girlfriend’s eyes were still glossy, but she was seemingly okay for the time being.

“Out of the question, y/n.” She leaned her head against your shoulder once more. “I have no doubt that we’ll both be happy.” Her words were comforting, but tiredness was consuming you as you sat with your eyelids drooping.

“Let’s hope so...”

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[tataswish]

❝   familiarity  /  one.

━   ♡ ・  paring:  kim taehyung x reader. ━   ♡ ・  genre:  soulmate!au, non idol!au, fluff (with a little angst!). ━   ♡ ・  word count:  2.7k.   ━   ♡ ・  summary:  you didn’t believe in soulmates. once. that all changed when you met yours; all thanks to one little drawing.

author’s note:  hi! i haven’t written in a while so excuse the small mistakes, but i hope you enjoy! if you’ve played bts world before, some of the stuff in this chapter might seem a little... familiar (no pun intented). i also plan to have the reader be connected to every member somehow in this fic, so they will come soon! hope you all enjoy, feedback is always appreciated. <3

“Shit,” you murmured under your breath, glancing at the rows of baked dough that were left in the oven for a little too long. Rather than its usual glossy, golden brown finish—it was dull, and… sad.

It’s been almost a year since you’ve been miraculously hired as the pastry chef’s assistant at Hotel Mudrin. You say miraculously, because even without any sort of culinary knowledge outside of cooking shows, you still managed to land the job. The chef was somehow impressed by the basic strawberry pancake dish you presented during your interview, and instantly saw growth potential in you.

That was also when you met your best friend, Seokjin. He was a newly hired intern at the time, and with the two of you being the only staff members in the hotel within the same age bracket, it didn’t take that much time for a bond to form. Seokjin was always getting into trouble by his boss Mr. Im, because to him, this intern could never do anything right. But with you there, you were able to lend a helping hand when tasks got a little too overwhelming—and things got a little easier from there. You and Seokjin began to spend time together on and off the clock since.

You weren’t sure if it was the adrenaline or the mixture of raging hormones from being together, but the two of you decided to give dating a shot not too long after. It lasted for a solid two months—and while it had to come to an end, you both concluded that you were happier as friends.

And it was true. You and Seokjin have been inseparable since.

“____,” you heard the head chef call out your name, which instantly reeled you back to reality. Glancing down at the burnt dough on the tray, you felt a surge of warmth rush through your cheeks, knowing that you were about to be scolded at any second. “Are you okay? Ever since you came back from your lunch break, something’s been off.”

“No chef, nothing’s wrong,” you lied, walking over to the nearby garbage can to throw the current batch of dough away. A reassuring smile soon formed across your lips. “Just tired.”

If it wasn’t for you spiraling during your lunch break after Seokjin had left, maybe you would be in a better head space. But of course, spending the last ten minutes of break thinking about what went wrong in all of your relationships didn’t exactly help anyone at all.

The head chef could see through your lies too. And rather than questioning it, he only continued piping cream on the freshly cooled pastries on his side of the counter. “Maybe you need some fresh air,” he added with a shrug of his shoulders, eyes concentrated on his work. It was evident he was still invested in the conversation with you, though. “There should be a shipment of mangoes coming in in about twenty minutes, do you mind bringing those boxes in here? Take all the time you need. I’ll work on making another batch of dough.”

“I can make the dough, chef!” you tried to protest, mostly as a way to convince your boss that you weren’t feeling too off (when in reality, you were). “It’s okay, the mangoes can wait.”

As you were about to reach for the measuring cups in a nearby counter top, you were met with a look from the chef that clearly said: Go get some fresh air. Now.

So, rather than questioning it, you did.

After washing your hands and hanging your apron by the door, you made your way outside of the kitchen and into the main hallways of the hotel. It was emptier than usual—mostly because it was a weekday afternoon, and the guests who were staying at the hotel were out. It was also the midst of October, and the influx of guests don’t usually start to come in until around Christmas-time. Which was fine, because you weren’t met with the stress of having to make hundreds of fruit tarts in a span of an hour. Instead, you were able to step out and take a small stroll, which was always nice.

Upon exiting the area where the stairs were (staff weren’t allowed to use the elevators, per Mr. Im’s orders), you finally arrived at the ground floor. You always felt so out of place in the main lobby, with or without your work uniform. With the spacious area matched with gray marble flooring and sleek interior design, it was never a place you imagined yourself staying in. Only the richest of the rich could afford even one night in this place, and you? Couldn’t even afford a proper meal for dinner on some days. Hotel Mudrin was known to be a hub for millionaires, celebrities, or rich families alike—not for struggling university graduates like yourself.

But sometimes, it was nice to dream.

Quietly humming to a tune of a song you heard in the radio earlier this morning, you casually strolled through the floor, making your way towards the back door where the shipments would be. The subtle smell of lemon from the newly mopped floors was an odd favorite of yours. From time to time you’d flash a friendly smile towards the guests or staff members you’d pass by. But before you could exit through the back and meet with the shipment truck, you decided to take a small pit stop to the front desk and say hi to your best friend.

“Dude,” you began the minute you saw Seokjin behind the front desk. His eyes were on the computer screen in front of him, typing and clicking away, but you knew him well enough to know that he was probably playing a game of Minesweeper like he always does. Crossed arms resting on the desk, you then rest your chin on them as your eyes look up to your friend on the other side of the counter. “Remember when I wanted to cry because I realized I’ll probably be single and alone forever? Well my boss—”

As you continued to ramble on, Seokjin’s eyes finally met with yours. They weren’t eyes that meant he was ready to listen to you vent, no… they were wide. Like he was in a state of shock.

He quickly began to shake his head, which caused you to raise an eyebrow in slight confusion. Did he want you to stop talking? Shut up? Right as you were about to say something though, his lips began to mouth the words ‘I’m busy’ over and over again.

That was when you knew, you fucked up.

The truth was, Seokjin was still busy tending to a guest, and you interrupted him actually working. Turning around, you briefly spotted the guest he’s been helping, and god—it was obvious by the look of your face that you had just embarrassed yourself into the next century.

“Sorry sir!” you apologized quickly, heat beginning to rush through your cheeks while you bowed for the hundredth time in the span of thirty seconds. Rather than making proper eye contact like any normal person would, your view was glued to the floor. “I honestly didn’t see you, and I know I should’ve, but—”

“It’s okay! Don’t worry about it,” he soon interrupted by providing reassurance. Once you heard a string of laughter from his end, you knew that he was understanding enough of the situation. “I get it.”

While you still couldn’t find the strength to really look him in the eye, you only returned with a sheepish laugh. It wasn’t every day you found yourself acting like a complete fool in front of a hotel guest (that was more of Seokjin’s speed in all honesty), so you didn’t exactly know how to fix the situation. Instead, you ended up sitting there in silence until Seokjin rescued the conversation.

“Alright!” he chimed in with the clasp of his hands, which was obviously your cue to slowly walk away. “You’re all checked in until the 31st, Mr. Kim. Let me grab your bags and take you to your suite.”

As you were about to leave, of course, you couldn’t go without embarrassing yourself one last time. Just as you were about to make a beeline towards the break room—also known as the place you were going to scream in—you managed to bump into this guest in full force.  

Looking up, you finally had the chance to take a good glimpse of the person in front of you. He was tall, muscular, with ash blond hair that was parted in the center. His almond eyes were practically gleaming behind his silver frames, and it paired well with the two dimples perfectly placed on each cheek.

In other words, he was gorgeous. And completely out of your league. Which is probably another reason why you were feeling flustered beyond belief at this very moment.

“Are you okay?” he asked softly. It felt like a movie—with both of his hands gently placed on each of your arms to provide support, gentle eyes locked on yours. You could’ve sworn you felt your heart stop, whether if it’s from being embarrassed or… swooned, even.

Swallowing thickly, you managed to let out a small “yeah,” before fixing your stance. He eventually let go, and the two of you were able to laugh it off for a little. “But are you okay, sir?”

“Didn’t even hurt,” he reassured, flashing that smile that accentuated his dimples really well. An open then was reached out as an offer. “You can call me Namjoon. Do you work here?”

But before you could even keep the conversation going, of course, Seokjin had to butt in. Literally. “Let me help you with that, Mr. Kim,” he urged with a friendly, yet painful smile as he walked in between you and Namjoon. He then reached down to pick up the leather suitcase that was sitting right beside the guest’s leg. Eventually, Namjoon had to retract his hand.

You took it as your cue to leave, so you excused yourself from the two without saying goodbye.

Thankfully there wasn’t anyone in the break room to look at you quietly take a moment to freak out over what just happened. If Namjoon wasn’t so good-looking and one hundred percent your type on paper, maybe you would’ve shrugged the interaction off by now. But you kept thinking over and over about how you were going to run into him again in one way or another—especially since he plans on staying at the hotel for over three weeks. All he had to do is walk into the hotel’s dining area to have dinner, and you’d be there. Not even as you off the job, but you in that stupid apron and chef’s hat.

Head dug into your arms as you leaned on the table, you tried to think of something—anything to get your mind off of what just happened. Letting out a deep exhale, you decided to take your phone out of your pocket and scroll through your e-mails. The first thing that caught your attention was an opened one, the one you received from that psychic about your soulmate.

Your soulmate is a man who is hard-working and bright, he will constantly continue to prove that he can be trusted and counted on by your friends and family…

Your eyes continued to read through the reading the photo was attached to, which was oddly comforting. To know that there was someone out there who could potentially be everything you’re looking for.

He is understanding, forgiving and respectful, even when you sometimes make mistakes…

Deciding to skim through the rest of the reading, you opened up that picture once again. You couldn’t help but notice something you didn’t the first time you saw it, and that was the small details on his facial features. He has three beauty marks: one sitting on the bottom of his eye, on his cheek, and one placed perfectly on the tip of his nose. You could’ve sworn those weren’t there before.

“And I thought I was the one who’s always the embarrassment at work,” you heard the familiar voice barge inside the break room, which obviously belonged to Seokjin. He walked over to where you were sitting and rested his chin on the top of your head, arms dangling from each side of your shoulders. “Jesus Christ bubs, you were a mess out there.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” you murmured grumpily, placing your phone back in your pocket. “Do you think he’s going to tell Mr. Im? I can’t be blacklisted from this place, I need my job.”

Seokjin only laughed. “Stop being so dramatic. He seems too nice to do that.” Shaking his head, he sighed. “Plus, I’m eighty-five percent sure he was hitting on you.”

“Ha ha, very funny,” you retorted while rolling your eyes. “As if he found my dirty uniform and the flour in my hair sexy.”

“You’re right, there’s nothing sexy about you,” he playfully joked back, which made you elbow him in the stomach. And all he did was laugh after. “What are you doing out here, anyway? Aren’t you supposed to be helping Chef Seong making those pies for tonight’s desserts?”

You sighed, nodding your head in response. “I’m supposed to be bringing a shipment of mangoes in from the back. Are you on your break? Do you want to come help me?”

With your best friend agreeing to accompany you to your trip to get the mangoes, the two of you head out of the break room and towards the back entrance of the hotel. As you opened the door to go outside, you noticed that the truck was already parked in front, with a few boxes of mangoes neatly stacked on top of one another. So, you decided to get to work and grabbed the first two boxes you see.

“Are these all of it?” you heard Seokjin ask (possibly the driver of the truck). You couldn’t really see, because the boxes were obstructing your view.

“There’s two more left,” the other person, who sounded like a man, replied. “Let me get those out.”

You made about two rounds in and out of the hotel before all of the boxes outside were brought in. Seokjin had to do the absolutely most as usual bringing way more boxes in than he could carry, and while he tried to play it cool as much as possible, you could tell he was struggling. His trembling arms were a clear tell that he could drop everything at given moment.

“Are you sure you don’t need any help?” you asked him, trying to suppress the laughter bubbling inside you.

“Does it look like I need your help?” Seokjin scoffed, which only made it harder to keep your laughter in. He couldn’t even look at you as he tried walking inside, because he was far too concentrated in keeping all of the mangoes inside these boxes. “Go away, you’re distracting me and my strength.”

As he continued to carry the boxes inside, you watched a couple of mangoes fall out and roll on the ground in front of you. He didn’t even seem to notice, because he kept walking. You only shook your head before bending down to quickly pick them up before they get too dirty.

Assuming that you’ve picked everything off the ground, you stood up and tried to catch up to Seokjin, who was already by the door. But rather than joining him, you were stopped. “Excuse me, miss!” you heard the foreign voice enter your ears. “You forgot these!”

You turned around to grab the mangoes out of the driver’s hands. “Thank you,” you replied with a soft smile. “Sorry about my friend, he’s—”

When you looked up to meet his gaze, it was as if what you were about to say next was thrown at the window. The person standing in front of you looked familiar. Even with the brim of his large straw hat hovering over his eyes, you could clearly see the prominent beauty marks on his features that resembled the ones of your soulmate in that one drawing.

It was him. It had to be.

[samthemarvelfan]

One Last Time (Part 2 of 2)

Summary: ModernAU! Mini Series! With her best friend’s wedding around the corner, Ella Monroe is bound to run into people from her past. While she may have left her old life behind, it seems as though her heart hasn’t.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC, feat: Wanda Maximoff, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Sam Wilson

Warnings: Swearing, heavy angst, infidelity, mentions of drinking, implied smut.

A/N: Part Two is here! (It’s long and im sorry lol) This idea was so much fun to write! Thank you as always for all the love on Part One, I’m so honored you’re reading my work! Buckle up, y’all. You’re in for quite the ride. <3 (taglist is still open, just send an ask!)

Taglist: @iheartsebastianstan @jjlizz @stuckysbabe @sk493494 @lefoutoir @nickangel13 @marvelismysafezone @lilulo-12 @warmvanillafeels @star-spangled-beard-burn @ravenesque @pinknerdpanda @wintersoldierissucharide @snapcapquartet @ellen-reincarnated1967 @unlistedpond @my-drowning-in-time @supernaturalwintersoldier @kimvmarvel @roseboho @disaffectedbarnes​ (strikethrough means the tag didn’t work! I’m sorry!)

“I was wondering how long you were gonna avoid me.”

Your breathe caught in your throat. Suddenly, it felt like ice water was rushing down your spine.

You couldn’t think—couldn’t move. You had to will your brain to function again.

“What exactly makes you think you’re worth me avoiding?” You hissed.

Bucky’s voice was ingrained into your memory—you’d know it anywhere. The biggest crowds or the largest rooms, you could pick out his tone.

He let out a small chuckle. “It’s good to see you, Els.”

He was sat in a shadowed part of the patio, it’s no wonder you didn’t see him when you came out.

You scoffed, “Is it? Wish I could say the same there, buddy.”

The shock of seeing him had faded; how were you this composed? You’d always thought you’d be putty in his hands if you ever saw him again.

Turns out your backbone was made of fucking steel.

Bucky stood, gripping onto what you assumed was bourbon—his go-to drink.

On the rocks, three fingers high. You thought, hating yourself for remembering.

When he stepped into the light, it was clear why your backbone had been strong; you hadn’t seen his face yet.

You’d be a liar if you said he looked bad. He was still handsome as ever. He had a bit of a beard now, the stubble of one at least, and his hair was shorter thank you’d ever seen it.

“Wanda said you asked if I was here.” You crossed your arms, shielding yourself from him.

He nodded, taking a sip of his drink. “I did.”

You waited for him to continue, but he didn’t. The only sound between the two of you was the ice clinking against his glass.

“You gonna tell me why?” You sneered.

Bucky smiled and shook his head. “Just curious, Els. Just curious.”

Why is he smiling? What the fuck does he have to smile about?

“Right, I’m sure curiosity is what made you hide out here. Alone.”

He finished his drink with one final toss, “Actually, I was with Steve, but he said he was grabbing drinks for you guys, so...figured I didn’t wanna intrude.”

Your arms fell to your sides, “Intrude?” You asked.

Bucky nodded, “Yeah. On your date. Personally, I don’t see it, but if he’s what you’re into now-a-days, then...” he drifted off.

Your blood began to boil. “What I’m into?” You echoed. “I’m not here with Steve, James. Even if I was, I don’t think that’s any of your fucking business.”

His eyes widened, confidence drained from his face. “No, no, Els I didn’t mean—“

“And another thing, what makes you think you have even the smallest right to make that comment? Or any comment! It’s been 5 years, James!” You’d shouted, grateful for the music bumping inside.

Bucky scrubbed a hand down his beard, “I know, I know...shit. This isn’t how I wanted this to go.”

“This?” You asked, “There is no this. Hasn’t been for a long time, you made sure of that.”

When he didn’t reply, you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

“Ya know what? You’re not worth the aggravation. I’ve been there with you and there’s nothing good in it for me.” You start heading towards the doors to go back inside.

“Enjoy the wedding, James.” You say without looking at him.

Your hand touches the door, when he calls out to you. “Ella?”

Your gaze is returned to him once more.

“Y-you look beautiful, Doll.” He says.

You, on the other hand, don’t say anything.

Once your back inside, you find Wanda and Sam and Steve and finish the rest of your night in the company of your friends.

All while wondering if that crack you heard in Bucky’s voice was real or not.

“Vomit. I’m going to vomit.��� Wanda said, fanning herself.

You rushed back to her with a glass of cold water. “Oh no you’re not, not in this dress and that makeup. I won’t allow it.”

She sipped the cold drink, “I’m starting to regret having no one up there with me.”

You adjusted her veil, primping the last bit you could. “No shit.” You joked.

She let out a long breathe, and then inhaled deeply. “I’m getting married. God, this is crazy.”

You smiled softly, “It’s not crazy. No one, and I mean no one deserves this more than you.”

Wanda’s eyes landed gently on yours, “You do.”

You sat with that for a moment. Your best friend is standing here, minutes before she walks down the isle, trying to get you to understand that you are worthy of love, and that you deserve your happy ending.

“I love you, Wan.” You choked out. “But if you make me cry I’m gonna kick you ass.”

You both laughed out your nerves. “Whew...okay, distract me. I can’t sit here for 10 more minutes in silence.”

You waited a moment, thinking on what to say, before you blurred out what was weighing most on your mind.

“I saw Bucky last night.” You whispered.

Wanda eyes expanded, “What? You didn’t tell me!”

You roll your eyes at her dramatics, “There’s nothing to tell, Wan.”

“Well what did he say?!” She prodded.

You recounted the small interaction to her. Her face making the funniest expressions with each added detail.

“Then he said ‘this isn’t how I wanted this to go’...whatever that means.” You said, handing her her bouquet.

“Anything else happen?” God damn this girl could read you like a book.

You cleared your throat. “I was uh, I was walking back inside and he stopped me and said ‘you look beautiful, doll’...”

Her jaw dropped, “He so wants you back.”

You laughed. Genuinely laughed. “Wanda, you’re psychotic.”

She slapped your shoulder, “Am not! He obviously regrets what he did and how things ended. Maybe he wanted to use this weekend to apologize?”

You shook your head subtly, slipping your heels back on. “James Barnes does not apologize.” You stated flatly.

5 Years Earlier, before the breakup.

“Buck, please stop.” You whispered to him.

He was being brash, loud, and boisterous at the very first work event you’d been invited too.

Oh yeah, and he was piss drunk off of the open bar.

“Stop what? I’m just telling stories, Doll.” He said, louder than he realized.

You colleagues all gave you looks of pity. Your boss Pepper was watching you with a curious eye, not judging, just taking in your interaction.

That was somehow worse.

“Bucky, please...everyone is looking at you. This is my job. You’re—“

“I’m what, Els?” He slurs loudly.

Your feel the blood rush to your face. “James...” you warn.

“What is it? Am I embarrassing you? I’m not fancy enough to hang out with your work pals, is that it?” His words are laced with venom. How long had he been feeling like this?

Your face softened looking at your boyfriend. About to speak, you notice Pepper making her way through the crowd.

You panic, “Alright, time to go.” Quickly, you grab Bucky’s hand and yank him toward the door.

You don’t stop walking until you’re a safe distance away from the building where the conference was being held.

“What is the matter with you?!” You shout unable to keep composure any longer.

Bucky’s face is stoic, and unfazed by your outburst.

“I was trying to have fun, but those uptight douchebags wouldn’t know fun if it—“

“I work with those people, James! My boss was watching you make an ass of yourself the whole time!” You can’t help the anger settling in your bones.

He scoffed, “So you are embarrassed of me. Noted.” He said walking past you.

But he paused, turning on his heel to take a few steps back to you. “Ya know what, Els? I didn’t have a fancy education and I don’t have a big, cushy job. I’m just an average fucking guy. I can’t fit in with these people, I don’t belong with those people.”

You cross your arms. Have you really become this couple? Fighting on the streets of Manhattan in the freezing cold?

“Have I ever asked you to be someone else? I invited you because my Boss told everyone to bring their spouses.” You take a step toward him.

Bucky sighed, running his hands down his face. “We’re just...two different people, Ella.”

All at once it feels like the winds been knocked out of you.

“Yeah. Yeah we are. But unlike you, I don’t see you the way you do. I see a hardworking man. A guy who has taken care of everyone else his whole life, and who deserves to have someone finally take care of him. I see a man who takes pride in his work and enjoys what he does. I see a guy who pays his bills on time, and who always manages to surprise me with even the smallest of gestures. I see the man I love, James.”

You were crying. How long had he felt so inadequate? It broke your heart to think he didn’t feel as important as he was to you.

“I can’t help my job. I can’t help my education. But don’t you dare throw those things in my face. I’ve worked hard to get to where I am, and I’m damn proud of myself for it.

He watched you for a moment, his jaw clenched tightly. Bucky shoved his hands in his pocket before hanging his head low. “I’m...I don’t know what to say.”

Damn his pride. You thought to yourself.

You reached out to him, cupping his cheek in your hand. “I know. It’s okay.”

He kissed your palm, before pulling you into him. “I’m not good enough. I know I’m not. Not for you.”

Bucky kissed your forehead, and for some reason, you weren’t sure why, it felt like he was saying goodbye.

The wedding was beautiful. Not a dry eye in the house—certainly not from you.

“Nat was a blubbering mess.” Sam jested.

“Excuse me for being over-emotional!” She said gesturing pointedly at her stomach.

You laughed, “I cried too, Nat, don’t worry.”

“Hey, got your table cards, guys.” Steve said, walking over to the three of you.

“Thank you,” you said with a smile, “She seat us together?”

He nodded, “Sure did, thank goodness.” Steve smiled, handing you your card.

“I need to go sit and eat and eat some more—in that order.” Nat said.

You walked to the beautifully set circular table, walking around to find what seat your place card was on. That’s when you noticed the fifth seat at the table.

“Who else is seared with us?” Sam asks.

Picking up the seat card between your seat and Steve’s, you felt you stomach do a back flip.

“Is that my seat?” A voice asked, approaching you from behind.

Not a voice. His voice.

You spin to see him. Bucky. Standing there with a sheepish grin on his face.

Practically throwing the place card down, you swiftly take your seat. “Looks like it.”

Wanda, I’m going to kill you. You think to yourself.

Bucky said his hello’s to everyone, taking his seat. “I didn’t know about this, I swear.” He whispers to you.

“It doesn’t matter. Nothing matters. Just...don’t talk to me.” You whisper harshly.

From the corner of your eye, you can see the defeat on his face as he sinks back into his chair. Since when does he have feelings?

You perk up at the clinking of a fork against a crystal glass. “Excuse me ladies and gentlemen? We’re going to have a few words from the Bride and Groom before dinner is served.” Wanda’s brother announced.

Vis went first. He spoke about how he and Wanda had met, and how quickly he fell in love with her. He spoke about what he loved about her in more detail than I’d ever heard some describing anything.

He loved her. He was in love with her.

It warmed your heart to see how safe and happy your friends heart was. A soft smile landed on your lips as you watching Wanda stand and join Vis to speak.

“You ever want something like this?” Bucky whispered to you as their speeches continued.

You glance at him quickly, shocked at the ease in which he spoke to you. His face was gentle, his eyes seeming desperate for an answer.

“What, a wedding? Sure I did.” You said earnestly.

He paused for a moment, clearly nervous to speak again. “D-Did you ever want it with me?”

You hesitated. Why is he asking you this here, now? Was Wanda right? Was this all a big plan to apologize?

You sighed, turning away from him slightly. “You were my everything at one point, Buck. Future included.”

You wondered if that sentence had hurt him the way it hurt you.

Wanda continued her speech. What she was saying you weren’t sure, your mind was exactly where you didn’t want it.

With Bucky.

Despite your back being to him, you felt his stare. The heat coming off of his body, ironically enough, made you shiver.

“Ella...” his voice strained from behind you.

You did a half turn to see his face. His eyes were watery with tears, and his jaw was locked. “Can I—can we talk? Please.” He begged.

You don’t know how it happened. Maybe it was the sincerity in his tone, or the loss of hope in his eyes, but before you know it, you’re following him out to the hallway, into an empty stair well.

“I just wanna talk, I promise.” He confesses.

You roll your eyes, “You said that already, James.”

Bucky groans. “For Christ’s sake, will you stop calling me that?”

A scoff passed your lips, “It’s your name. If you’d like, I’m sure I can come up with some other things to call you.” You quipped.

He stood still finally, “It makes it sound like we’re fucking strangers, Ella .”

“That’s because we are!” You shout. “It’s been five years, probably more since I’ve seen you, let alone spoken to you. You don’t know me anymore, and I’m fairly certain I never actually knew you.”

The feeling of your heart beating out of your chest took over. You were allowing yourself to feel for the first time in all these years. All the hurt and the pain and the rage he’d caused your heart was being laid bare.

“Yes you did. You were the only one who ever saw the real me.” He said somberly.

You scoffed, “Good to know. The real you is a cheater and a liar. Noted.”

He groaned furiously, “No! For fucks sake that’s not what I meant.”

You watched the struggle happening within him. Bucky was never a “good talker” as he used to say, that’s why he always wrote letters. It was obvious he was trying to piece together some kind of coherent thought.

“Just say what you wanted to say, James.” You urge him, crossing your arms.

He shook his head. “I’m not...fuck, I’m still not good at this. You’d think I would have learned how to fucking apologize by now.”

Your breathing hitched, “What did you say?”

He sighed, “I’m taking a really long time to...just fucking say...I’m sorry. God, I’m so fucking sorry for what I did to you.”

Suddenly ice water was coursing through your veins. He said sorry. James Barnes said he was sorry.

You couldn’t speak, and even if you could, what would you say?

His voice was shaking as he spoke, “I was so fucking selfish and blinded by my own insecurities, that I let it ruin the best thing in my life. You were...God, you were everything I could have ever wanted.” He smiled, presumably getting lost in his memories of the two of you.

He stepped closer to you, and to your surprise, you didn’t back away. “But just cause I wanted you doesn’t mean I deserved you, and I guess deep down I knew that. Hell, I wanted to break up after that disaster at your office party. Remember that? That’s when I knew if we stayed together, I’d just drag you down with me.”

His words broke—re-broke your heart. The tears stinging your eye were begging to be shed. But Bucky was speaking without hesitation now, so you let him.

“I tried, Doll. I tried so many fucking times to be a man and end it. But then you’d come home after a long day and look so fucking happy to see me,” his voice cracked with emotion, “and I couldn’t do it. You were so perfect, and so good to me. I was a selfish prick who wanted to soak you in a little more before I knew I’d have to push you away.”

“You had no right to make that decision!” You sobbed.

Bucky reached out and wiped your tears off your cheeks. Why don’t you push him away?

“Honey, I was a broken, immature boy pretending to be the man you deserved...” a tear fell down his cheek as well.

You finally pushed him back, wiping your own eyes. “So you decide to fuck another girl in our bed? That was your great plan to push me away? How about be honest, Bucky!”

He stood there, taking his verbal beating. “You could’ve told me how you were feeling. I would have told you how ridiculous that was--how much I fucking loved you! How I would have helped you in any way you needed me too. But you decided to fucking kill me instead. You broke me, Bucky. The life we had wasn’t perfect, but it was ours.”

He scrubbed his face with his hands, sniffling when he shoved them back in his pockets. “I know. I know what I did. I see your face every God damn day of my life. That look on your face when you saw that girl in our house.”

You bit your lip, the painful memories of that day making your stomach churn.

“I never slept with her, though.” Bucky says plainly.

You scoff, “and here I thought for one we were finally being totally honest with each other.”

He put a hand over his heart. “On my life, Doll. I didn’t. Had I planned too? Yeah. But you came home that afternoon and thankfully I never did.”

“James...” you scold, “I saw her! She was pretty much naked in our bedroom!”

He nods, “She had gone to the bathroom to look for the condoms I hid in there. She couldn’t find them though, that’s when she walked out and you walked in.”

As you pieced together his story, your eyes flitted from side to side. “So..so you never cheated, you just intended too. But you never actually slept with someone else.” These were questions from you. They were statements. You were trying to make sense of all of this.

“Not that it makes any of what happened better, but I was gonna tell her to leave as soon as she came outta the bathroom. Honestly? I couldn’t get it up at all.” He jokes to ease the moment.

“Buck...” you chided

“I’m serious! I felt so fucking guilty, Els. I couldn’t do it. Besides she...” he drifted off.

“She what, Buck?”

His cerulean eyes met you for the first time. “She wasn’t you, Baby.”

Baby.

He’d called you that so many times. This time it felt different, it felt familiar. It felt right.

You shook your head, “Stop it, James.” Your lips quivered as you spoke.

He refused, “No. I lost you once, because of my own arrogance and stupidity, I’m not gonna do it again. Do you know how many times I wanted to write you? I have so many letters written, all of them unsent because I knew you’d never wanna see me again.”

He’d written you? He’d thought about you? All these years and you’d thought he’d forgotten you.

“I’ve loved you...what seems like my whole life, Els.”

You sniffled, “So what do you expect? Us to fall into each other’s arms and pretend like the last five years didn’t happen?”

He shook is head. “Of course not. I don’t even know what I was hoping for, really. I just needed you to know the truth, and for you to know how deeply and wholly sorry I am.”

In an instant, the world had changed. You were no longer holding onto the bitterness that had seeded itself into your heart. You’d seen Bucky in a new light, granted not a flattering one, but a true one.

One that showed he wasn’t the heartless monster you’d been believing he was for years.

“I forgive you.” You choked out.

A muffled sob snuck past his lips. “C-Can I hug you?” He asked timidly.

You hesitated, but eventually nod. In an instant, Bucky’s arms are enveloping you. His warm chest comforting your shaking body.

He held you for what felt like hours, inhaling your scent, and caressing you’re back.

But you didn’t mind.

It felt good to be held again, and to be held by Bucky felt familiar.

He pulled away slightly, to look at your face. His eyes roamed over every detail, like he was afraid he’d forget something if he’d never see you again.

“Buck.” You practically whisper.

He smiled, “I can’t kiss you...right?”

You bit your lip. “No...no. Definitely not. Right?” You reply weakly.

He stepped back, “Yeah, that’s...that’d be too much.”

You smoothed you’re dress down, and tucked some hair behind your ear. “Exactly. Yeah.”

“We should get back out there anyway. I have a feeling we’re missing that very expensive dinner.” He laughed.

You smiled softly, “Don’t wanna miss that.” You jest.

Bucky let you walk in front of him, leading the way.

You grasp the door handle, but before you can swing it open, Bucky grabs your hand and twirls your body into his.

Without missing a beat, his lips are on yours before you even have time to think. Like second nature, you melt under his touch.

Mouths moving with a remembrance and familiarity that you hadn’t felt in forever. Hands searching for changes in each other’s bodies—there were none.

“Bucky. Buck...stop. Stop.” You moaned.

He did as he was asked, “What—what’s wrong?” He breathed into you.

“We can’t do this...not here.”

He pulled back, hesitantly, but he does. “You’re right. Shit, I’m sorry.”

You laugh, “Don’t be. We just...we can’t just jump back into things like that. We gotta get to know each other again. Okay?”

He smiled whole heartedly. “Really?”

You nod. “Just...don’t make me regret this, Bucky. Please.”

Bucky grabbed your hand, bringing it to his mouth. He placed a chaste kiss on your palm, before closing it and returning it to your heart. “I promise you, Ella. I promise I’ll make this right.”

And you believe him.

Is it against your better judgement? Maybe. But you know the old saying, ‘Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...”

As you walked back to the reception with him, you saw Bucky with new eyes. You no longer looked at him with disdain and malice, but instead, you saw hope.

Hope for not only your future and his, but hope for one you can build together.

In the end that’s all you wanted, something that everyone in your life seemed to have and believe you deserved.

A happy ending.

Part One