#i’m just blown away by it & the repeated theme that everyone has a chance to be redeemed

[torisprlng]

💬

[kaizokuou-ni-naru]

The Voyage So Far: Water Seven

east blue (1 | 2) || alabasta (1 | 2) || skypiea || water 7 || enies lobby || thriller bark || paramount war (1 | 2) || fishman island || punk hazard || dressrosa (1 | 2) || whole cake island || wano (1 | 2)

i’ve mentioned several times before that the davy back fight is one of my least favorite arcs, mostly because i found it very dragging and tedious when i was reading it, but there are a couple things i really like in it, and, perhaps unsurprisingly, most of them have to do with zoro. i really like his moment here with chopper, and it also showcases his ability to act as more of an authority figure to the crew, which is something that makes a substantial return after enies lobby with the matter of usopp’s return. 

zoro and sanji’s match in the davy back fight is far and away my favorite part of the entire arc. it’s just really fun.

like i said, this arc isn’t a favorite of mine, but i do definitely understand why it’s important to the saga and greater story in a couple different ways. one of them is that it’s just an easy, lighthearted detour that both gives the audience a chance to breathe and the strawhats a chance to showcase just how much they love each other and work well together- which turns into a fucking sledgehammer to the skull in the next arc when that unity is directly threatened. and the other reason this arc is important...

...is because of aokiji.

aokiji’s introductory scene is a brutal showcase of absolute power, and a very clear reminder that the strawhats are still very much little fish in a very, very big pond. all of the strawhats are impacted by this to some degree- it’s how badly they get curb-stomped here that leads luffy to come up with his gears as a way of closing the huge power gap he’s just learned about.

most important, though, are robin and usopp. for robin, this is a stark reminder of the fact that the government will never stop hunting her down; for usopp, who’s less obvious, it’s the seeds of the full-blown inferiority crisis that will later explode with the news about merry. both of their arcs throughout water 7 and enies lobby, essentially the twin emotional backbones of the saga, start right here.

i really like that the other strawhats all fell asleep waiting for robin and luffy to wake up. it calls back to them doing the same when nami was sick before drum, and also it’s just so fucking sweet. 

water seven is my favorite island, full stop. if i was going to live anywhere in one piece’s world, i’d want to live on water seven. it’s just so creatively designed and visually great, with the canals and the tiered city and the massive fountain in the middle. the supporting cast are still one of my favorites, and the culture feels very real and authentic. i just love water seven a lot.

i just said it but it bears repeating- the water seven supporting cast is really good. iceburg, the galley-la shipwrights, franky and his family, kokoro and chimney are all really memorable, and most of them are really likable, too- and cp9, with all their eccentricities, fit in perfectly. water seven’s cast is very interconnected, as well, and their relationships all feel very believable.

all of which, of course, only makes the later treachery hurt all the more.

the atmosphere of water seven is really, really well done. the bad starts slow, with the news that merry is unfixable, and then continues into an accelerating downwards spiral of hopelessness: usopp and luffy’s fight and usopp leaving the crew, robin’s seeming betrayal, the assassination attempt on iceburg, the city and galley-la turning on them as a result, and the agua laguna- it just gets worse and worse and worse.

and then, after they’ve been stomped down about as far as they can go and come out alive anyways, they pick themselves back up again and go to save their friend, because that’s what the strawhat pirates do.

i just really like getting to see these four going feral on the franky family, it’s one of my favorite scenes in this whole arc. in general, i tend to love the moments where luffy specifically gets properly angry, and we get a lot of them in this arc. 

even though the fight between luffy and usopp is genuinely very tense and  fast-paced and would probably be exciting if it were any other two characters fighting, it never really feels anything other than melancholy. i think that’s a testament to just how good oda is at setting the mood of the scene. it’s made very clear, especially through the reactions of the other characters- merry ‘crying’ is fucking heartbreaking- that this is nothing less than a tragedy. 

:(

i think it’s kind of interesting we aren’t shown franky’s face until about halfway into water seven. prior to this, we’re given pretty much only reasons to hate him, with his theft of the strawhats’ money and the franky family beating usopp to shit. but just after this point is when we start getting our first humanizing and sympathetic moments for him, starting when he gets worried and a little frantic when he hears about the attempt on iceburg’s life.

i just really, really like the way some of these water seven action sequences are depicted. they feel very tense and desperate, which matches the general mood of this part of the arc perfectly.

this panel of usopp working on merry always reminds me of the shots of the klabautermann doing the same during skypiea. i’m not sure if it’s even intentional, honestly, but it’s an extra little bit of heartbreak either way.

one piece has a lot of amazing spreads, but this might be one of my favorites for sheer impact. cp9, watching as the city they’ve lived and worked in for years burns down in a fire they set, satisfied by a job well done. it’s almost all in black and white with very little grey, which creates some fantastic contrast, and their pitch-black silhouettes against the nighttime inferno are just striking. 

this entire scene between usopp and franky, as usopp works on the merry and franky gives him advice and tries to make him see its hopeless and they kind of awkwardly, accidentally bond, is probably my favorite in the whole of water seven. it was also the scene that singlehandedly made me love franky as a character.

they have a really good, really enjoyable dynamic, and at the same time the conflict between them is real and understandable, and brought about because they’re both trying to do the right thing.

tom’s workers are one of my favorite little groups of characters in the whole of one piece’s story, and they deserve more appreciation. they’re family!! a little family of broken pieces who worked together to build something really, really amazing. and they still care about each other in the present, even though they got shattered apart so badly and none of them ever really recovered. 

this is a tremendously under-appreciated chopper moment. not only did he carry two full-grown men out of a fire, he even managed to get zoro’s sword and iceburg’s hamster. extremely cool of him.

this is also the exact moment the strawhats’ collective luck begins to turn: chopper saves the day, and nami learns that robin did what she did to protect them, and sanji gets aboard the sea train, and from there it’s a no-brakes train from their very lowest low straight to the triumph at enies lobby.

i love all the shenanigans sanji gets up to with the sea train, i think the whole sequence is absolutely one of his shining moments. it’s always a delight to see sanji get up to Sneaky Bastard Bullshit, and the whole thing is just so fun, which is a dearly needed breath of fresh air after how relentless this arc has been until this point.

robin’s little smile when thinking of luffy and when she joined the strawhats... :( i’ve noticed it’s a recurring trend for strawhats who try to leave the crew to flash back to when they joined as they do. usopp has it earlier this same arc just before leaving, and sanji does it in whole cake island in the sanji vs. luffy chapter. 

i really like how much everyone comes together at the end of water seven leading into enies lobby. after how fractured and fraught things have been throughout the arc, both within and without the strawhat crew, it’s great to see them not only all united again for a common goal, but with a huge group of allies at their backs. 

these three are SUCH a hilarious team, and i would love to see them work together again like this sometime. they’re literally just clowning on the marines all the way up the train, it’s fantastic. 

factually i understand sanji’s aversion to fighting with his hands and his fighting style is very unique and cool and also meaningful to him because he learned from zeff, and also if i remember right it’s implied he learned how to swordfight from the vinsmokes which makes it very reasonable he would want absolutely nothing to do with that skillset 

but speaking purely in terms of stupid idiot lizard brain i think sanji should fight with knives more

this is another of my absolute favorite spreads, and i think what makes it for me is the casual confidence- luffy tells zoro to cut the train, and zoro does, both of them with no doubts at all about zoro’s ability to do so. it really goes to show how far they’ve come from back in east blue when zoro couldn’t even cut luffy out of a metal cage.

there’s something very impactful about the fact that of all the strawhats, robin gets this speech from usopp. usopp, who’s had the worst falling-out with luffy in the series to date, is the one who tells robin: you haven’t left the crew yet, you can’t leave the crew yet, luffy is coming to get you. believe in him. 

franky’s “existing is not a crime” line is one of the most memorable and iconic lines from this entire saga, and for good reason. it sums up one of the main themes of not just this arc but also the series as a whole- the very same idea will come up again for ace during marineford, and in law’s backstory as well. it’s never a crime to just exist, and people should not never be persecuted for their blood or heritage. one piece doesn’t fuck around with its theming, it really doesn’t. 

to be continued next time, with enies lobby!

[coolnerdyandalone]

 ‘To Be So Lonely’ is literally the saddest and loudest Larry song and here’s why

First of all, all of this was fueled by this post on tiktok by @finelinemegs (thats her tiktok handle idk if she’s on tumblr or anything) so the credit really goes to her.

Ok so basically the groundbreaking realization that she unveils is how the background guitar trilling is supposed to be mimicking the phone line ringing when you’re calling someone and waiting to leave a voicemail - and really once you hear that, it’s all over.

The theory is, when the guitar is trilling in the background, imagine that as the voicemail being left by a drunk Louis during a fight right? (probably a pretty big one by the looks of it but we’ll get to that later). When the guitar is not trilling in the background, that’s what Harry’s feeling as he’s listening to the voicemail (if you’ve ever gotten a drunk VM from an ex [or anyone you were in a fight with really] you know the feeling of mentally responding to whatever they’re saying as you’re listening to the VM for the first time - H has done a really good job capturing that whole rollercoaster of emotions here)

[additionally, the reason we know its a vm that he received and not left for someone is because who the hell would remember the content of a drunken voicemail that they left for someone well enough to write a whole song about it, using what appears to be a lot of direct quotes? Not me that’s for sure, I can hardly remember the content of the voicemails I leave for people when I’m sober, but maybe that’s just a me problem]

Knowing this, the lyric “And I'm just an arrogant son of a bitch who can't admit when he's sorry” makes SO much more sense, and it makes INFINITELY more sense why Harry thinks it’s SO hilarious that that is the line that everyone’s obsessed with and giggles almost every time he sings it (see here, here, here, here, and I’m sure plenty more times but it’s late and I need to get up early tomorrow). AND knowing that he’s the recipient of the voicemail that that line seems to be a direct quote from, we KNOW at the VERY LEAST that the voicemail was left by a man because we know Harry’s not the type to change pronouns just for the sake of singing it from the “right POV” (girl crush? juice? anyone? anyways).

So now that we’ve established that TBSL is a voicemail and response between Harry and Louis, lets get into the nitty gritty of the lyrics shall we? (we shall)

Don't blame me for fallin' I was just a little boy

Right off the bat we’ve got a reference to the x factor days. Even without being all 💙💚about it, who else could it be about? Who else would have had a relationship with since that person was a little boy? (or if you’re not past Harry saying at the Forum performance “why is it that when you think i’m calling myself an ‘arrogant son of a bitch’ that you sing the loudest?” and you think he’s singing it from his POV as the caller, who has he been in a relationship since he was a little boy?) The answer is Louis. It’s always Lou (hehe) 

Don't blame the drunk caller Wasn't ready for it all You can't blame me, darling Not even a little bit I was away

And I'm just an arrogant son of a bitch Who can't admit when he's sorry

Next, we establish the POV of the caller (we’ve pretty much established this to be Louis right? or do I need to prove it further? no? ok good) aka associate the trilling of the guitar “line ringing” with the caller, and the absence of the guitar “line ringing” as something else. Then you have wasn’t ready for it all which is strangely reminiscent of what is said in too young, which we KNOW is written from Louis’ perspective about falling someone when you’re too young (perhaps just a little boy anyone?). Then there’s i was away - a reference to the strain of distance being the issue in the relationship? which is a common theme from songs/interviews from the early one direction days up to now. 

Don't call me "baby" again You got your reasons I know that you're tryna be friends I know you mean it But don't call me "baby" again It's hard for me to go home and be so lonely

Next we have the entire tone shift of the song that suggests we’re switching from the caller to the recipient of the VM. You have the initial reaction of anger followed by the exacerbation of someone who’s been through this argument too many times already with someone who they’re very intimate with - they call the recipient “baby” multiple times but clearly the recipient (I’m just gonna say Harry and Louis from now on I know y’all get the picture) is not in the mood for pet names. Pet names, by the way, that we know Harry and Louis use with each other. Next we have the line that truly breaks my heart: we all know the association Larry have with the term home and everything it means to them (and if you don’t here’s an incredibly detailed post which has been posted on the @larryreceiptsproof blog as well as my own humble analysis just of the song here). Harry saying “its hard for me to go home and be so lonely” is HEARTBREAKING and has the same exact vibes as always you’s “I went from LAX to Heathrow, walked through my door, but it felt nothing like home, 'cause you're not home, waiting to wrap your legs around me”

I just hope you see me In a little better light Do you think it's easy Being of the jealous kind? 'Cause I miss the shape of your lips Your wit It's just a trick And this is it, so I'm sorry

This part is *chef’s kiss*. First of all, during the instrumental before the lyrics start (here) you hear the lighting of the match and then the flame being blown out in the background VERY faintly and then that’s followed by “i just hope you see me in a little better light”?? The SYMBOLISM!!! Does him blowing out the match/flame/light mean that his response is going to be that there’s no chance at Harry seeing Louis in a better light after what he’s done? Is it just him trying to bring attention to that line?? For what purpose?? why??? Next we have a reference to jealousy that we ALL know is a VERY common theme in the Larry discourse (if you don’t know, pls see this vid originally by @freddiesmyqueen ) Then we get to the shape of your lips which! we know Harry has VERY unique and pluSH lips (thank you to @dreamboaths for supplying most of those posts). The “your wit, its just a trick” line does confuse me a bit because Louis is generally known as the wittier one, but we do know that Harry does have his knack for stand up and maybe it being a ‘trick’ is a reference to its more of something he hides behind or something he can use to hide his true emotions?

Anyways the rest of the song continues on repeating the same lyrics I’ve already analyzed so no need for me to be redundant. BUT if anything, this will probably change the entire way you listen to this song and for that I apologize because I really used to be able to listen to it and not even think and now I’m probably gonna cry every time.

[all1e23]

Astrophile [Pt.10]

Chapter:  Moonbeams & Starlight

Summary:  It’s Orion’s 5th birthday!

Warnings:  FLUFF

A/N: It’s  May29th! That means it’s Ori’s birthday! So what’s a better way to celebrate than reading about her birthday party!! Send me love because I’m needy, okay?!  Plus all your comments make my day. Beta’d by the beautiful and talented @wintersxsoul I love you 3000.

***My fics are not to be saved or posted on any other sites without my written permission. Reblogs are welcomed! Thanks!**

It’s incredible how fast things get done when someone knows the important people and knows exactly what to say to light a fire under the right asses. Y/n’s apartment was cleaned up in record time, and thankfully, the leak hadn’t caused any damage to her furniture or any of the things her grandparents left her. There are still boxes of personal items to be put away, and everything in the bottom drawers of her wardrobe and kitchen cabinets had to be taken out to avoid any potential damage, but other than that everything was back to normal.

Thanks to Tony’s quick thinking and actions, nothing was severely damaged and she will be forever grateful. 

After their sunset confession, Bucky and Y/n made sure to keep in touch every single day and most days they ended their nights with a video chat – to talk about Ori’s party of course. It did not have anything to do with the fact that they hated being this far apart from each other.

Why anyone would think that is completely absurd if you ask Bucky.

By the day of the party, Y/n is practically vibrating out of her skin from her excitement. She’s naturally excited for Ori to see all the work that was put into the shop– it was a lot of effort on everyone’s part. They moved all the shelves to the outer walls of the shop and filled the middle with every space themed treat she could come up with, Tony had her favorite restaurant cater, floating stars (both lit and glittered), a fake shuttle, and every chair had its own pair of rocket boosters. Tony’s balcony is going to be permanently stained from all the silver and red spray paint used to make those jetpacks.  As excited as she was to see Ori’s reaction, she is just as excited to give that sweet girl a hug and laying eyes on her dad wouldn’t be the worst thing.

She just hopes It’s everything Ori’s has pictured.

“Oh. My. Stars!” Ori squeals and runs full force towards Y/n who turns around just in time to catch the little girl and hugs her as tight as she can without hurting her, “This is already the best party ever! Thank you, Y/n! Thank you!”

Okay, maybe this is a big, big win.

“You’re welcome, sweet girl,” Y/n whispers and kisses her head. “Wanna check it all out?”

Steve smirks and looks over at Bucky as they all slowly make their way into the small bookstore, "Where did she get ‘oh my stars’ from?”

“Y/n says that. I guess she’s picking up a few things,” Bucky says, smiling at Y/n and Ori, eyes sparkling as he watches the two of them moving about the store.

Steve whistles lowely and shakes his head, “Better be careful. You’ve got stars in your eyes, Buck.”

Y/n hoists Ori up on her hip so she can try to touch all the stars hanging from the ceiling.  Ori stretches her arm up high enough to catch two of the gold glittering stars and giggles when Y/n attaches it to her pigtails. Bucky doesn’t think he minds having stars in his eyes as long as they lead him to her.

-------

To say the party was a huge success would be putting it mildly.

Not that Bucky had any doubts with Y/n planning it. There is no way she would let Ori be disappointed on a typical day, so there is zero chance this was going to be some sloppily thrown together mess.It’s her birthday and he could hear Y/n’s voice in his head, she’s special on every day, but she should get to be extra special. Even knowing all that, Bucky is blown away by the thought she put into every single detail – even the food.

There are star and mood shaped Rice Crispy Treats, moon cake pops, and star-shaped pizza – that Bucky is sure Tony paid an arm and a leg for. The cake is two-tier covered in tiny stars, fondant planets, a space shuttle with ‘Orion’ iced on the front to look like a constellation. Bucky wanted to get her alone to talk from the moment he arrived, it’s been over a week since he’s laid eyes on her in the flesh, but Ori has held her attention from git-go.

That is until now.

Steve and Sam have Ori playing inside the bright silver shuttle Y/n spent all week crafting from cardboard, paint, tulle, and glitter. Bucky scans the small group of people and spots Y/n leaning against the back wall of books, a huge smile on her face as she watches Ori playing. He tucks his hands in his pockets and makes his way over to her, his nerves starting to pick up the closer he gets. Y/n’s gaze was steadfast on Ori, but she looks up the moment he stops in front of her, and everything about her glows– all because of him.

Three or four sentences start and die on his tongue before he finally gives her a lopsided smile and offers a soft but heartfelt compliment, “Not a bad party, Beck.”

“Thanks,” she beams in response. “I had a pretty important little girl to impress.”

“Trust me. You’ve been her favorite for months now, but I think this secured it for the rest of your life,” Bucky says, earnestly but there is something in her eyes he can’t place – something that resembles worry, genuine happiness quickly overtakes the concern and he can’t help but grin.

"So Stark did all this?” He asks, leaning against the wall next to her, but his eyes stay on Ori. He doesn’t think he can look at Y/n right now, not when she’s going to talk about how great Tony is.

“You can call him Tony, you know,” she retorts, smiling.

“So Stark did all this?” Bucky repeats, grinning widely.

Y/n rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest, still smiling. 

“Yes. Tony did all the organizing and helped with my apartment. I picked everything out, and he helped me get everything set up so the two of you could be surprised. He’s not that bad.”  

“Never said he was.”

“Why don’t you like him?” Y/n asks, honestly curious and maybe a little worried she overstepped. “It is because we went on a few dates? Are you upset that he’s dating me?”

“I never said that I didn’t like the two of you together.  I don’t– He’s not right for you. He’s not the one,” Bucky says with such conviction, such certainty it’s as if he’s privy to some secret she doesn’t know. It’s as if he has an in with Fate or God or whoever binds soulmates names in the stars.

“Then who is, huh?” Y/n asks, slight teasing in her voice surprising even her. “Care to share with the class?”     

Bucky locks eyes with her, his mouth dry, and his heart hammering against his chest – it’s pounding so hard he can feel it in his ears. He swallows the lump in his throat and shakes his head, breaking their eye contact.

“Not him, Y/n,” He says, barely above a whisper. “Not him.”

Tony watches as Bucky walks away leaving Y/n confused and slightly flustered. He spent the majority of the party just watching. As far as kids go, Ori is pretty great, and it is fun to watch her roast her dad and uncles, but what is most interesting out of everything, Bucky and Y/n. Every time Y/n is distracted by setting out food or decorations, organizing games, or playing with Ori, Bucky follows her like he’s unable to look away. Anytime Bucky says anything to Y/n, she shines brighter than the pre-light stars hanging from the ceiling.

It doesn’t take a genius to see what’s happening, but he’s known something was up since their first date. The way she says his name was a dead give away and it’s easy to spot once you know the signs. Tony knows every sign from personal experience. He never did manage to work up the nerve to say something and probably never will.

If any good is going to come out of his colossal screw-up, this was it. Tony can help keep Y/n from repeating his mistakes.

“Hey,” Y/n leans against the wall next to him and slips her hand into his. “What are you doing hiding over here? Without you, I wouldn’t have been able to do any of this, you should be enjoying all your  hard work.”

“No big deal,’ Tony shrugs, carefree and easy.  “Just made a few calls.”

History doesn’t have to repeat itself, Tony reminds himself

“So tell me something,” He nods towards Bucky and turns to face her. “When are you going to admit you have feelings for Bucko boy over there?” 

Y/n chokes, gasping on whatever she is drinking from her cosmic colored paper cup, making Tony grin as he pats her back in the most unhelpful way possible.

“I’m not – I don’t – I’m here with you. I don’t– we are just friends,” Y/n sputters.

“Right. That’s why you both keep stealing glances at each other when you’re not looking? And when he says anything at all to you, your face lights up like you just discovered a new constellation?  And it doesn’t matter what you say, every time you speak Bucko gets that dumb dreamy look on his face like you’re the most the amazing thing he’s ever seen in his life.”

“He doesn’t look at me like that,” she admonishes, quietly, letting her eyes drop to the ground.

“He does, Y/n.”

Tony gives her hand a gentle tug coaxing her to look up when she does he tilts his head towards Bucky, and she catches the brunette staring. Even from across the room, she can see his cheeks pink, and he quickly looks down to hide his face, but she can spot that smile from a block away.

“It’s okay, you know? We can still be friends. I mean, the fooling around has been great so if you want to continue that–” Y/n’s head whips back around towards him and playfully punches him in the stomach. Tony groans, fighting off his laughter, “Don’t be an idiot is all I’m saying. You’re going to end up like me and miss out on what’s right in front of you.”

“Pepper?” She asks, her eyes soften, already knowing the answer.

“Yeah, Pepper,” he forces a smile, the one he uses for press and interviews she come to learn, and kisses her forehead. 

“Alright, this is getting gross. I’m feeling sick to my stomach with all this lovey-dovey talk. I want you to know I meant what I said, but…” Tony flashes a genuine grin and wiggles his brows. “if you wanna go back to my place and work out your feelings? All night. I’m here for whatever you need. I can be that friend for you.”

She rolls her eyes and presses a light kiss to his cheek. A loud rueful laugh and a tiny giggle fill the air, and she turns to find the owners, warmth spreading through her chest when she spots Bucky tickling Ori – she knows where she wants to be tonight.

“I think I’m gonna help Bucky get Ori home.”

“Yeah,” Tony smirks. “I thought you would. Just don’t wait to tell him, okay?”

“You tell Pepper first,” Y/n counters, grinning smugly.

“Good God,” Tony groans. “Remind me again why I dated you?”

“Because I’m out of this world!”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that.”

Bucky didn’t have another chance to talk Y/n after their awkward moment, he hasn’t been the best at talking to her lately. It didn’t matter anyway, right after their chat they went straight into cake and gifts, and now Ori is fast asleep in his arms. He doubts he’s going to have a moment alone with Y/n before she heads home with Tony. Steve is just finishing loading the last of the presents in his car when Bucky spots Y/n walking over with a bag and he assumes it’s to spend the night with Tony, but he frowns as she walks up to him instead and wonders aloud, “What are you doing? I thought you were going home with Tony.”  

She smiles and shakes her head, wiping a bit of icing off Ori’s cheek once she is within reach. Ori wrinkles her nose and nuzzles her face into Bucky’s shoulder,  “I’m going home with you. If that’s okay. My apartment is still a bit of a mess.”

Not a total lie, not the whole truth either.

“Of course, it’s okay,” Bucky assures her. 

“Everything alright? I saw your talk before… I’ll kick his ass if I have to. I’ve been waiting for an excuse to kick his ass actually. For years.”

“Yeah, I think I’ll be fine.” She replies with amusement and fond exasperation.  “No ass kicking needed. Sometimes your heart does its own thing, and you don’t know where it’s leading you until it’s standing right in front of you.”

“If this is about what I said earlier–”

Y/n presses her fingers to his lips and shakes her head. 

“It’s not. Well, it is, but it’s not because you said it. You were right, though.”

“I was?” Bucky mumbles around her fingers, making her giggle and causing her to drop her fingers from his lips – much to his displeasure.

“Yeah, you were, Buck.”

-------

Y/n tucks Ori’s blanket around her and secures her canopy behind her headboard while the little girl gets comfortable. She flicks her Frozen night light on and sets her stuffed animals around her in bed, intent on heading back downstairs, but a sweet, soft voice stops her, “Y/n?”

“Yeah, starlight?” Y/n answers, already walking back to her bed.

“Can you stay with me for a minute?”

Y/n smiles as Ori raises the end of her pink blanket enough for Y/n to climb into bed next to Ori. She immediately wraps herself around Y/n, and Y/n returns the gesture pulling her as close as she can.

“Story?”

“A story?” Y/n repeats. “I don’t think I know any off the top of my head.”

“Make one up?” She mumbles, still half dazed from falling asleep on her dad’s shoulder – sugar crash might have had a hand in that as well. “You work with books. You have to know all the stories.”

“I guess you are right about that,” Y/n chuckles and closes her eyes, running her fingers through the little girl’s curls as she frantically tries to come up with a story. Then it hits her like a meteor.

 “Okay. Here we go. It’s a story about–”

“Love?”

“Well, yes – I guess it is.”

Ori smiles and snuggles closer to Y/n, “I like this kind of story.”

“Me too,” Y/n smiles and kisses the top of her head. 

“Okay. One day, a young princess brought her daddy, the king, into one of the village shops. A young, peasant girl worked there. The moment the shopkeeper laid eyes on them, she knew her life would never be the same…”

It takes bucky thirty freaking minutes to get all of her gifts inside the house. Tony bought her a mountain of gifts, and he’s pretty sure none are acceptable for a five-year-old. Combine all of those with all the presents Steve and Nat got her, Ori is going to need a room just for her toys. That, or he’s going to need a second living room because she’s slowly taking over the only one they have.

He sets the last of the gifts down next to the couch and closes the front door. It was oddly quiet for two rowdy rascals. He wanders through the house, softly calling out for Y/n, but there’s no answer. She’s not in the kitchen or living room, and the bathroom downstairs is empty – no sign of the girls on the bottom floor at all. He slowly ascends the stairs and stops when he reaches the doorway of Ori’s bedroom.

“So, that’s where you got to,” Bucky mumbles softly, staring at Y/n fast asleep on the little girl’s bed and Ori snoozing on top of Y/n with her head on Y/n’s chest.

Bucky leans against the door and smiles at the sight before him. He knows he should wake Y/n up, Bucky’s fallen asleep in that bed more times than he can count, and it never ends up well, but he can’t bring himself to ruin this moment. Y/n snuggles Ori, and her head drops onto Ori’s, letting her cheek get lost in Ori's curls. Bucky smiles at the sight. There is a warmness in his heart despite the way his stomach is flipping, and his skin feels tingly. 

“Shit,” Bucky whispers, softly, careful of the girls sleeping only a few feet away from him. He forces himself to take a deep, stuttering breath, but no matter how much air he gulps into his lungs, it’s not enough. He fumbles as he pulls his phone out of the pocket and shuffles downstairs, calling the only person that can help.

“James?” Natasha murmurs softly. “What’s wrong? Is Ori okay?”

“Yeah, she’s fine. I need to ask you somethin’,” Bucky mutters quietly and peeks back up the stairs to make sure everyone is right where he left them – they are by some small miracle. 

“What, uh, what do you feel when you look at Clint?”

There is a long pause, and Bucky can hear shuffling, he assumes she is climbing out of bed and walking in another room where she can talk freely– he’s so grateful for that. Clint is a loud mouth, and he can’t keep a secret to save his life.

“Okay,” Nat says, clearly confused. “What?”

Bucky blows out a breath and collapses back onto the couch, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger. It shouldn’t be this hard to explain, and yet, here he is, floundering like a teenage boy with a crush.

“Okay, so, when Clint is… doing Clint things,” He groans, exasperated and slightly embarrassed at himself. “You know, eating two slices of pizza at once, sleeping on the couch with his mouth open, being a pain in my ass– You look at him when he does all that, what does it feel like? In your chest, I mean.“

“James. What the hell are you talking about?” Natasha begs, her voice full of annoyance.

Great, now he’s managed to annoy the only person that can help him. He closes his eyes and sighs. It’s now or never and the prospect of never making him sick to his stomach. Here goes nothing.  

“I’m talking about Y/n. I think, what I feel for her, it’s more than I thought and a hell of a lot more than just friends.”

Previous // Next

[heavenly-hero-mourningstar]

Taiyuu High Entrance Exam: Grigori Vai Quirk: Animate

@taiyuu-high-oct

Vai knew they were in for a rough ride from the second they saw the building.

They had wondered for quite some time why the entrance exam was being held at a secondary location instead of on school grounds, but looking up at the massive warehouse (carbon steel frame– melting point of 2,500° F; Fiberglass roofing– melting point of 2,075° F), the answer became clear.

Hundreds of applicants stand outside, slowly filing into an atrium of sorts (concrete floor– ‘melts’ at around 1,000°F) where a dark-haired woman in a grassy bodysuit awaits them, leaning casually against a two-story tall, cast-iron door. Vai manages to push their way into one of the less crowded corners just as the woman speaks.

“Welcome, hero wannabes!” she shouts, not bothering with a microphone. The crowd hushes and from Vai’s position at the back, they can just barely make out the woman– Pro-hero Lacca-daisy, principal of Taiyuu High –move away from the door with a grin. “As you can see, we’re a bit overwhelmed with the sheer number of applicants this year, but this test was a bitch to set up as it is, so no whining about the extra competition, ‘kay?”

Several applicants shift and grumble, but the principal pays them no mind.

“This here,” she stops to pound twice against the metal door. “is your first challenge on the road to becoming heroes, and let me tell you, it ain’t an easy one. You’re gonna be placed in a maze with a bunch of enemies and your goal is to wrack up as many points as you can by grabbing ‘flags’ we’ve scattered throughout. Bigger flags are worth more points, but there’s no limit to how many you can grab at once, so try an’ be strategic about which flags you choose. Once you’ve collected your flags, you’re going to bring them back here where the door will automatically log your points. There are two other ‘safe zones’ like this in the maze, but you’ll have to find those for yourselves. You follow so far?”

There’s a murmur of agreement throughout the atrium, but once again, Lacca-daisy doesn’t particularly seem to care.

“As for the enemies, there’s two types you gotta worry about. Type one: faculty. They’re all wearing masks and have been warned about using their quirks, but don’t think that makes ‘em any weaker. With or without their quirks, these guys will still kick your ass if you get too cocky.” she says, giving the crowd a meaningful look. “Then there’s type two: robots. You’re welcome to go all out on these guys and they come in a variety of shapes and sizes just to spice things up. Neither enemy will actively try to hurt you but they will slow you down, and if you’re not careful, steal your flags.

Last rule and if you break this one, you will be disqualified regardless of how many points you get, no sabotage. You steal from another contestant, set traps, slow them down– I don’t care how, you’re out of the running. Any questions?”

A smattering of hands raise and Lacca-daisy grins. “No? Nobody? Then get going!”

The door slams open, startling most of the crowd and sending the first of the applicants into action. Sat at the back of the crowded room, Vai immediately curls in on themself as the room empties around them.

‘Shit,’ they think. ‘Already off to a bad start.’

They stand and begin sprinting after the others, straight past a smiling Lacca-daisy and into the maze. Walls sprout up around them, each one reaching two stories before meeting the roof. Vai takes the first left and keeps going straight, trying to get away from the throngs of hero-hopefuls.

CLICK.

“Shit!” The lights go out. From around the corner, Vai can see a purple spotlight, and ahead another hundred feet is a pulsing green and blue one. It’s just barely light enough to maneuver, but it’s certainly disorienting, and more importantly…

“I’m glowing. Ffffffffff–” The soft white light of their skin and hair sends halos onto the walls and within moments, they can hear the mechanical whir, thump of a robot heading straight for them. “The one freaking day I don’t bring a hoodie,” they lament, dashing further down the corridor before ducking just below the pulsing light. They put their hand to the wall, testing for it’s malleability before cursing again. The walls are a carbon alloy, clearly created to withstand the barrage of quirks about to be thrown at them.

I could probably use it anyway, but I have no idea how long this test is, and if I overdo it…

The bot comes into view– a tall, gangly thing with reinforced arms and a clear weak spot in its neck. It scans for Vai, but hidden low under the blues and greens of the pulsing light, it isn’t immediately apparent that they’re there until a pale hand suddenly grabs the bot by its leg.

It tries to step back, but suddenly the teen is wrapped around it like a koala hanging for dear life and forcing their quirk through it faster than they can think. It raises its arm to beat them off when a loud pop! sounds and the whole thing twists, taking head and arm and legs with it.

The metal melts and bends and twists before re-converging on something resembling a twisted giraffe.

Vai slumps to the ground, staring up at their creation with dull eyes.

“Why did I make a giraffe? Could’ve made a lion, but no. I made a giraffe.” The creature in question cocks it’s matte metal head (steel, thank gods) and Vai groans again. “I know, I have no one to blame but myself.”

Looking up as they are, Vai sees the moment the blue light glints against the ceiling and–

“Okay, sweetie. Lift me as high as your spindly little neck can,” they grin. The creature complies, and Vai silently dubs him Jeff because why not. Once Jeff has lifted them as high as he can (about 17ft), they press flush against the closest wall and activate their quirk again, forcefully shaping handholds into the wall until they can reach the ceiling.

“Fiberglass roofing,” the teen grins. “Lightweight with a melting point of 2,075° F.”

Minutes later, soaring eighteen feet in the air on a freshly made pair of fiberglass bat wings and followed closely by an overzealous Jeff, Vai finds the first of their ‘flags’ rather quickly. Not having been given any guidelines on what exactly the flags were, they were surprised to find a variety of objects ranging from small disks to a full sized crash test dummy, all with the Taiyuu logo printed across them in incandescent paint.

“Jeff, take the dummy. I’ll grab as many of the smaller ones as I can,” they say.

“Oh, will you now?”

Vai spins in the air, shocked to find a rather well-muscled man in all black standing at the end of the alcove. “Shit.”

The man pauses, and Vai can suddenly feel the disappointed frown materialize beneath his mask. “You know this is a school entrance exam, right? You shouldn’t curse.”

Vai blushes red. “Shit, you’re right. Wait. Sorry, shit!” Vai buries their face in their hands, letting out a long groan. “I suck at this.”

They look up just in time to see the man running toward them, a bo staff having appeared in his hands. Jeff leaps in front of his creator just in time for the staff to come down with a loud and reverberating CLANG as Vai grabs as many of the small disks as they can before taking to the air and releasing Jeff, dropping him in all his 450 pound robotic glory directly onto the man in black.

Flying off as fast as they can, because Jeff’s robot form may be heavy but there is no way a trained pro is going to let that stop them, Vai shouts a quick, “Sorry!” and speeds back toward the first Safe Room. By the time they arrive, there are at least three dozen other applicants crowding the door, all clutching a variety of neon painted Taiyuu-themed objects. Luckily, their altitude makes it slightly easier to push past the squalling throng, but after dropping the disks and making their way back out, Vai still feels shaken in a way that has nothing to do with the crowd.

So many people want this…

They push through the middle this time, landing and curling their wings around their glowing form as best they can. They can feel the beginnings of some pretty bad bruises forming under the Fiberglass harness of their wings. Note to self: get an actual harness for next time.

“Attention, applicants! Time is now half over. I repeat; you better hurry your asses up!”

“She’s allowed to curse…” Vai grouches, turning in on what looked like another flag deposit. “Shit! This one’s cleaned out already.”

BANG!

Vai spins around, turning the corner to find a section of floor blown to pieces and two applicants nursing minor scrapes and burns.

“There’s traps now, too?” one of them shrieks, crystal growths in her skin flashing red in anger. “What the actual Hell?”

“Ah! I think I broke my ankle!” the other cries. Shaggy black hair obscures his eyes, but Vai is pretty sure there are tears dripping down his cheeks.

Vai pales. If I had landed any sooner, that would’ve been me… I’ve gotta keep flying.

“Do you need help getting back to the Safe Room? It’ll be slow, but I could probably fly you there?” they offer. Both applicants look at them like they’ve grown a second head.

“What, and quit while there’s still time left?” the crystal girl says. “Not a chance.” Beside them, the dark-haired boy nods along.

“We’re going to be the best hero duo the world has ever seen! We can’t do that if only one of us gets in!”

Vai nods in understanding, but feels sick even as the boy shakily gets to his feet, his friend helping him continue into the maze. They peel up their own shirt and gently prod at the darkening bruises digging into their hips and ribs.

Everyone wants this…. I can’t afford not to give it my all.

Taking off once again, they quickly scour the maze for more flags, but only find several more deposits, a disk someone must’ve dropped, and the second of the three Safe Rooms. That along with quite a few broken robots and several more injured teens– a girl who could stick to walls even warns them that certain walls have laser sensors in them too.

“Just a few more points,” they incant. “I can’t give up now.”

Suddenly, something hits them from behind with enough force to send them straight into the wall. Vai collapses to the ground in a heap, ribs burning like the sun. Another robot stands behind them, this time with tank treads and a gun.

Vai tries to stand, but the pain flares brighter and they collapse back to the ground. “No…Please, fuck, no.”

The robot advances, leveling the gun with Vai’s tear-stained face and for a brief second, they remember Lacca-daisey’s words.

“Neither enemy will actively try to hurt you but they will slow you down, and if you’re not careful, steal your flags.”

If they give up that last disk, the bot might leave them alone. If they don’t fight, just surrender and let it keep them here…

But that would mean giving up. That would mean saying ‘hopefully this is enough’ and letting fate decide, and fate, as Vai knows from personal experience, is an idiot.

They wrap their arms around their middle, feeling where a rib has popped out of place and is pressing horribly against the abused skin under their make-shift harness. The robot stills as they close their eyes, taking it as a sign of defeat, and Vai forces their quirk through their own body, superheating and popping the rib back into place with a pained shriek. It hurts– it hurts so goddamn bad they think for a second they might’ve lost consciousness, but when they open their eyes, the robot is still there, the gun is still leveled at their face, and Vai still doesn’t have enough points.

They stand, ignoring the sharp jabs of pain, and launch themself at the robot with all the force they can muster, sending the last of their energy into the bot in the vague hopes of it being enough. The treaded robot trembles beneath their hands, the gun click– click– click– clicking until Vai realizes with a start that the clicking has turned to a roar. They look up at the mane of their creation and give a watery smile.

“I made a lion.”

The buzzer sounds three minutes later and Vai has barely managed to scrape together another two disks and a plastic dog before collapsing in the second Safe Room they found, their lion falling to sheet metal as the last of their adrenaline-borne energy runs out. Eventually, several black-clad faculty members come to get them, one of them checking over their rib and asking what on Earth they did to it that the entire thing seems to be twisted like a barbers pole. The lights come on and someone heals them– properly this time –and Vai goes home limping, covered in sweat, and positively beaming.

They did their best, and fate will have nothing to do with it.

[doyelikehaggis]

Person A tries to get their friends to kiss under the mistletoe, and they completely forget about their crush on Person B until they both end up under the mistletoe. This is peak Kizzie content.

Being acutely observant is something that Lizzie likes to pride herself on. At least, when the thing she's observing is important and manages to find its way into her spacial bubble.

It's easy for her not to spare things a certain glance, something that Josie has pointed out recently she needs to work on. But sometimes those things nag at her, forcing her to pay attention.

One of those things happens to be Kaleb.

She's noticed him a lot more lately and been ignoring the growing feeling in her chest at the same time. Avoiding another epic rejection and humiliation is high on the list of things she wants for this year of positivity.

Crushes are great, but she just can't risk her healing mental health right now. Especially with Sebastian now roaming around the school thanks to Kaleb and MG figuring out how to free him from desiccation. They're friends, but nothing more. There's already enough drama in her life as it is with Malivore's monsters making a return. 

Strangely enough, her reason for noticing Kaleb at this particular moment has nothing to do with the feelings she is choosing to pretend don't even exist. Her eyes narrow as she watches him across the library from the chair she's been curled up in for the last hour, having taken a break from the decorating committee.

He's currently helping them out, to her surprise, but she supposes as a member of the honour council, it's sort of a requirement. He's balanced on the edge of the bannister stringing up a set of the lights that they spelled during Chemistry of Magic to work without any additional electricity. 

Except, he's doing it rather slowly. His eyes aren't even on them despite his hands moving, wrapping them through each little loop. She follows his line of sight for the third time and it once again comes back to the table below, tucked into the corner.

Landon and Josie are sitting across from each other, using their decoration break to figure out how to uncharm the tinsel that one of the coven witches decided to bring to life.

Trying to help them is Hope, flicking through a book and throwing out suggestions.

She can see the awkward tension between the three of them; finding out their history without really remembering it definitely helped with that.

Hope isn't exactly back at the school, only helping out for the holidays since she isn't sure she can go back to New Orleans just yet and isn't able to sleep at Mystic Falls High.

Things almost feel like they used to before Malivore. She keeps to herself as much as she can. Except Landon and Josie both know their past thanks to everything being thrown out into the open a few weeks ago, and Landon doesn't seem to want to let it go, even if he doesn't remember all of the details. 

They seem to be stuck in the same cycle, Lizzie's noticed. Landon sees Hope by herself, invites her to hang out with him and Josie while Josie gives a halfhearted protest before doing the same as Hope and reverting back into the pre-Malivore version of herself. It's almost always awkward whenever Lizzie sees them, exchanging quick looks between the three of them.

It's also frustrating to watch. But no matter how many times she tries to talk to Josie about it, she brushes it off and says she doesn't want to talk about it. A bad sign, for sure.

She even denies it when Lizzie catches her shooting glances at Hope that hold the same subtle, suppressed feelings as it used to. If Lizzie didn't know better, she would say that not remembering Hope has only given Josie the chance to fall head over heels for her all over again.

But of course, Josie won't admit that because she's even more stubborn than she likes to admit, won't get over her brief jealousy, and somehow thinks that it's a betrayal to Landon.

It's as if she can't see that from the moment Landon found out he and Hope used to date, he's gotten all flustered and dorky around her like he used to.

Then again, Josie doesn't remember how things used to be. None of them aside from herself and Hope do.

Which doesn't explain why Kaleb keeps looking over at them like that, and even shaking his head like he's doing now, even rolling his eyes.

Sighing, she closes the book she's been reading. It's Christmas-themed, the third in a series of fantasy books, and a special edition for the holidays.

Her mom sent it over a week ago because there isn't a single bookstore in Mystic Falls and the nearest one is in Richmond.

She supposes she can leave it until her next break. If she forces Hope to work with her instead of sitting around getting all gooey-eyed over Landon and Josie, she might be able to get her part done with faster.

She leaves the book in the chair and walks around to the other side of the library, smiling at MG on the passing.

When she glances behind her, her eyes following him, he's pulling a string of lights from the box in his arms and handing them over to Sebastian. One requirement of him staying is he has to be a team player, and that includes helping out with decorating.

He doesn't seem to mind so much when he's helping MG.

Rolling her eyes, she just continues until she's standing by the table of decorations that Kaleb is currently using. There aren't many left, mostly just a few more strands of tinsel, but once they're done with the library, they still have a few of the classrooms and possibly the study hall and the secondary common room assuming that the other four people on the committee haven't gotten too far on their own.

She picks up a piece of gold tinsel that shimmers a faint purple, glittering with magic. Not a single one of their decorations aren't spelled with magic. Even one of the menorahs has an air of it to make sure the candles can't be blown out too early and to make the oil smell of cinnamon and gingerbread. A treat for the younger ones.

"What are you doing?" she hears Kaleb ask and looks up to find him staring down at her, raising an eyebrow. 

"Asking you the same question," she replies, still pulling the tinsel through her hands, and mirrors his suspicion. "Why do you keep staring at those three when you're supposed to be decorating? This place has to be completely ready for the holidays. That's why we have allocated break times, and you agreed to help out."

Kaleb rolls his eyes. "Do you not see me on this bannister with these damn things? I've strung up at least four of them, and they keep trying to electrocute me. I think you witches need to check out the spells you're using, 'cause I'm not sure they're supposed to do anything other than light up."

"Maybe it's because you're putting them up wrong," she says bluntly.

She eyes the lights in question pointedly, hanging down lower on the second last loop. Only those soft glowing bulbs are flickering, the rest all staying at full brightness. He glances at them and groans, rolling his eyes again.

"Shouldn't you be on your break right now?" he asks, reaching back up and starting to undo the lights, fixing them. "You were hanging decorations for, like, two hours."

Lizzie finally puts the tinsel down, but only to pick up a strangely-coloured reindeer. It must have been one of the ones the younger kids decorated during their art class. It's cute, even with its bright yellow nose and green body.

"I should be," she agrees. "But then you staring at my sister and her hobbit forced me to cut it short. So, I repeat, what are you doing and why does it involve those three?"

Kaleb pauses, sighing as he lets go of the lights. All of the bulbs are glowing now, not even the slightest flicker, coiled perfectly from one end of the beam to the other.

She glances down the rest of the beams and finds the rest of the lights the exact same.

It's a little impressive, she'll admit, as someone who admires good organization and decoration. She's been told she gets it from her mom.

"Why do you care?" he asks, and waves a hand at the table. "I'm nearly done."

She shrugs. "I'm curious."

He stares at her for a moment, but she simply flashes him an overly-sweet smile, refusing to leave. He seems to realize that, and sighs again before hopping down off of the bannister, landing beside her with the ease of a vampire.

"Fine. Landon's just having some issues and he's been talking to me and MG about them." He scans over the remaining decorations for the next most important. "I've been tryna help him out since MG's preoccupied with Dracula over there."

Lizzie snorts at the comment, surprised. She wasn't aware he had much of an opinion on Sebastian, though it's becoming increasingly clear by the twinge of mocking in his voice at the nickname that he's not his biggest fan.

Probably because of MG since everyone else has had no problem falling for his charm as she did and still does, aside from Josie and Hope.

"Help him how?" she asks, her eyebrows furrowing with suspicion. 

"Nah, not happening," he says, shaking his head with a chuckle as picks up the tinsel she had been playing with before. "I'm not breaking his trust like that."

Lizzie rolls her eyes and crosses her arms, but he's stubborn and loyal, and she knows he won't give in.

She glances back over in Landon's direction.

Josie's shifted her seat much closer to Hope's, reading something that she's pointing out in a book situated between them. Landon's watching them with those slightly wide eyes, and his inner struggle is written all over his face and into the soft fondness he's doing a terrible job at hiding. 

She straightens up, her face lighting back up. "Are his issues perhaps centred around my dear sister and his ex?"

Kaleb lifts his head, glancing from her to the three of them. He opens his mouth as if to protest, but she waves a hand.

"Don't worry, you didn't accidentally give anything away with all of your incredibly obvious staring," she assures him, and he presses his lips together, looking mildly unamused. "Josie's been having the same issues. As has Hope. Of course, neither of them are willing to talk about it because of that whole weird awkward thing they've got going on what with everyone's memories still erased."

"So it's not just Landon then," Kaleb says, apparently dropping all pretence as he throws another glance at them.

"No. Honestly, you'd think it wouldn't be that hard for them to work out the very clear solution to this whole mess for themselves," she says, shaking her head along with him. "They're all just too worried about ruining something or someone hating them for them to actually make a move. It's sad."

As she says it, a little voice in the back of her head that her therapist has been trying to help her get better at blocking out points out her mild hypocrisy. For once, it's not entirely wrong. That doesn't mean she's listening to it.

"And that's why I said I'd give Landon a helping hand."

Lizzie's eyes narrow as she turns back to Kaleb only to find him grinning. There's a strange, mischievous glint in his eyes.

"What exactly does that mean? Actually—" she quickly holds up a hand as he starts to answer, "—never mind. I do not want to know. This is a... partially drama-free year for me, and I will not get involved in whatever the hell this is."

"Alright," he says, shrugging it off just like that as he turns back to the decorations. 

She doesn't leave. She watches him pick things up, clearly searching for something. Her mind whirs, and she can't help her eyes darting back to Josie, Landon, and Hope, doubt creeping in.

They could use some help. Maybe just a little push. And she does like the idea of being a Christmas cupid. 

"But, out of curiosity, what did you have in mind?" she asks.

Kaleb chuckles at her quick change of heart but he doesn't address it. 

"Well, seeing as how it's the holidays and all," he says, and nods to the table pointedly, "I was thinking that one of the oldest tricks in the book could work. I don't know what yet. That's why I keep staring at them as you said."

He then nods to the three of them.

"I'm tryna figure out what they'd fall right into without figuring a way out of it."

He pauses, turning back to her with a thoughtful look on his face.

"Do you think truth or dare is too obvious?" 

She makes a face, her eyebrows furrowing. "Yes. Probably, if your plan is to jump right in with it, especially considering the way we play truth or dare. They wouldn't be allowed to lie to any question you ask. As much as I love brutal honesty, I'm not sure that it's the best way to go with this."

"What about charades?"

"Chara—what book are you getting these from? My mom?"

She rolls her eyes and ignores Kaleb mirroring her.

"Why don't you just use mistletoe?" she asks, partially joking. "That's the oldest trick in the book. Trap them with a holiday-themed social convention that's always brushed off, giving them the perfect opportunity to give in to their feelings while also pretending that it's all in the name of holiday spirit."

Kaleb's face lights up. Her eyes widen.

"I wasn't serious," she says, having thought that that was very clear.

She waves a hand in Josie, Landon, and Hope's direction.

"They will never fall for that. Even if you got a witch to spell the mistletoe like they did last year so that they can't just walk away without at least a peck on the cheek, they'll be looking for it everywhere so that they can avoid it!"

"I don't know, I've watched Landon nearly walk into a wall twice and get a bauble stuck in his hair already," Kaleb says, shaking his head with genuine doubt. "They might fall for it."

"Maybe Landon would, but Josie and Hope wouldn't," she counters. "And — what's the plan, anyway? Trap all three of them? Mistletoe doesn't work like that, and honestly, it might be the most awkward thing to force anyone nearby to watch."

Kaleb makes a face at that and doesn't disagree. She's almost smug. Almost.

"Nah, we'd just have to get two of them," Kaleb says as if it should be obvious. "Then, assuming it works and they kiss, they'll end up talking about it with the other one 'cause they don't want anyone feeling bad about any guilt or anything, and then they'll confront their feelings for each other. And then my job is done."

He smirks at her in a way that would usually infuriate her. It does a tiny bit. But at least he actually has a right to his smugness because he makes a good counterargument. She scowls.

"You know that that entire plan revolves around the two that you catch with it not being Josie and Landon, right?" she asks. "And it's about a fifty-fifty chance that any of them would actually talk about this sort of thing. Basically, your plan relies on good timing, them having some sort of moral conscience, and I'm assuming a touch of magic."

Kaleb nods without missing a beat, his smirk never slipping for even a second. 

"Pretty much," he says. "Wanna help?"

Lizzie scoffs, shaking her head at him, the thought completely absurd. Josie is her twin sister, and she trusts her. She couldn't just do something like this that could hurt her or put her in any sort of uncomfortable position. 

Her eyes happen to stray back to their table, making her falter. Josie's relaxed a little more, still beside Hope. They're both grinning now.

It probably has something to do with the glitter shining in Landon's hair as he nods slowly, his unamused expression slipping as he clearly tries to bite back a smile. 

On the other hand, Josie probably wouldn't mind too much. For the first half-hour or so, she'll probably be furious.

But if it really does smooth things out between the three of them and puts an end to the internal conflict and turmoil Josie is clearly suffering through, maybe the ends justify the means in this one particular case.

She sighs but holds out her hand. "Where's the mistletoe?"

Kaleb grins from ear-to-ear. "MG's got it. Gimme a second."

She waits as he walks over to MG while he's in the middle of handing Sebastian another string of lights that he seems to be having some trouble figuring out. He's back in seconds and waving a sprig of mistletoe, biting his lip, his amusement shining.

She rolls her eyes but takes it from him. This could be their worst idea yet or the solution that everyone who's had to spend more than a minute in the bubble of awkward is desperately needing. 

The plan is simple enough. They debate for a few minutes over the best place to hang it; Kaleb insists that the front door is the best, most logical place, but Lizzie argues that either of the entrances in the library makes far more sense since they'll need to use them at some point.

They settle for the main doorway into the first common room. 

Lizzie waves her hand, levitating it into the air. It's easier than attempting to find a ladder. She carefully positions it to hang right in the centre, laying in wait for any unsuspecting couples to walk past. 

"Fun bonus is that it won't just catch those three," Kaleb says as she tilts her head, making sure it's perfect. "We all good? Or you gonna put some fancy invisibility spell on it like you did last year?"

"No, I think it's fine like this," she decides. "It was fun last year, but I don't think we need it. Plus, there would be more chance of Josie getting mad at me for this, especially if it happens to be Hope and Landon who get caught in it."

Kaleb almost winces with sympathy. "Yeah, smart move. Maybe don't tell here you had anything to do with it. At all."

"Oh, trust me," Lizzie turns to him, smirking, "this is all on you."

"Throwing me under the bus?" he asks as he eyes her, feigning insult. "That's how we're playing this?"

"Yeah, pretty much," Lizzie says without so much as batting an eyelash. "Your idea, your responsibility."

"That's why you don't wanna put a spell on it, isn't it?" Kaleb asks, the realization clearly dawning on him as his eyes narrow.

Lizzie decides to play innocent and shrugs, turning and walking down the hallway to head back to the library. Her mouth curves as she hears him follow her, unable to bite back her smirk no matter how hard she tries.

"You knew that Josie and Hope would automatically assume that it was you who did it," he goes on. "Whereas this way, they won't suspect you at all. Giving you the perfect opportunity to tell them it was me without them knowing you had any part in it."

"Okay, I know I'm dramatic and all, but this wasn't some high-stakes heist," she scoffs as he falls into step beside her.

"Says the one who won't have two witches mad at them for tricking them," Kaleb retorts, and Lizzie rolls her eyes. "And, weren't you the one who came up with this plan? I said truth or dare and charades. You suggested mistletoe."

"As a joke!" Lizzie protests, looking at him now. "You're the one who thought it was actually a good idea. Which, I still stand by my initial opinion of it being predictable and has a slim chance of working, especially on—"

"Wait, shh," Kaleb quickly cuts her off, a hand flying out to her shoulder to halt her in her tracks.

She glances at him in confusion to find his eyes wide and a familiar look on his face. It's the one all vampires get when they're listening to something that no one else can hear. 

"What?" she hisses, her eyes darting down the hallway. "Kaleb? What the hell—"

His eyes grow even wider. There's a strange lurch in her stomach like the breath being sucked from her lungs, and then a split second later, she's no longer in the same spot. When she blinks, she's facing down from the end of the hallway that had previously been on her right, half-hidden in the doorway. 

She faintly registers Kaleb's arm half-strung around her for just a moment before it drops, though his hand remains on her shoulder.

Her confusion quickly disappears as Hope, Josie, and Landon come into view, walking down the hallway as they talk. Thankfully, they keep going. For a moment, Lizzie thinks they've gone another way entirely, but Kaleb isn't moving.

She then hears Landon chuckling before he appears again, now just beyond the doorway with the mistletoe hanging in it. 

"I don't know," he says, turning to face Hope and Josie who stop alongside him. "I wouldn't underestimate the power of an evil Santa Claus. I've read about Krampus before. The thing is terrifying. You would really wanna face that?"

Hope rolls her eyes. "We didn't say we would want to. Just that we think we could. I mean," she glances at Josie, the two of them sharing a look between them as she huffs out a partial scoff, "what could it really do?"

"Throw presents at us?" Josie jokes as she grins, and Hope laughs.

"Okay, what part of half-goat, half-demon aren't either of you getting?" Landon asks, throwing his hands out at sides, but his exasperation only seems to fuel their amusement. "It could maul you! To death!"

"As opposed to mauling us to sleep?" Hope questions, tilting her head with mock seriousness.

Landon throws his hands up as it only sets Josie off into laughter. 

"You can joke now, but you won't be when Krampus shows up here on Christmas Eve," he warns, even pointing a finger at them. 

Lizzie scoffs under her breath and turns to look at Kaleb as he arches an eyebrow, a look of puzzled amusement passing between them. She thought that Landon was already weird, but somehow he continues to find a new level.

Kaleb quickly nods for her to turn back and she does, just in time to watch Landon walk forward. Through the doorway.

Josie shrugs. "I still think we could take him."

Hope almost giggles as Landon stops and turns back around to stare at Josie as if she's grown two heads. 

"You two are both insane," he declares, earning him a roll of Josie's eyes as she steps forward.

Lizzie holds her breath, her eyes widening as she and Kaleb watch them.

Landon's already too far into the common room to be successfully caught in the mistletoe unless he decides to move back over to them. He stays where he is, though, as Josie lingers in the doorway, the mistletoe hanging right above her head.

"Come on," Hope says, and finally takes a step closer to them. Right beside Josie.

Excitement flutters in Lizzie's stomach as she glances to the mistletoe. 

"You really think evil Santa Claus is worse than any of the monsters we've already faced?" Hope asks. "We've literally had a small army of them come after us at once. I'm pretty sure we could handle one goat-demon."

Landon starts to shake his head, groaning. "It's not just a goat-demon, though! I mean, it sort of is, but—"

"Hey," Kaleb calls out, cutting him off. 

Lizzie's eyes widen impossibly further, quickly turning to stare at him as if he's just turned into the goat-demon Landon's going on about.

He doesn't even glance at her, though, a smirk on his lips, ever the epitome of casual nonchalance as all three more sets of eyes turn on him.

"Might wanna look up," he says to Josie and Hope, his eyebrows raising.

Confusion flickers across their faces, but Landon's already taking his advice. Hope and Josie quickly follow at his slightly stilted intake of breath.

Their eyes land on the mistletoe and Lizzie can see them both stiffen, going completely still. She's not even sure they breathe for a good few seconds. 

They slowly look back down until their eyes lock. The hesitation and uncertainty is written all over their faces as they don't make a move. Maybe this wasn't a good idea after all, Lizzie thinks, considering how well they were just getting along compared to how utterly quiet and awkward they are once again.

"It's a dumb holiday tradition," Hope says, shrugging as she offers a small, clearly forced smile. "We don't have to."

Lizzie groans quietly under her breath. Thankfully, neither of them notice as Josie falters, her lips parting but no words coming out.

"I knew I should never have let you talk me into this," Lizzie says, turning to Kaleb. "It sounded like a bad idea, and surprise, surprise, it was. I should have just let you play your game of truth or dare."

"Let me once again remind you that I never talked you into this," Kaleb says, shaking his head. "You offered. And," his eyes dart back to Josie and Hope, "look! It's not that bad. I think it might actually be working."

"Did you two set this up?" Landon asks, his eyes narrowing at them in disbelief, clearly hearing just about every word. 

"Of course not," Lizzie says, but he's still staring at her with that look on his face, and she caves, rolling her eyes. "Well, someone had to do something! You three are so awkward around each other that everyone else can feel it, and it's driving us all crazy! We just thought you could use... you know, a little push in the right direction."

"So much for throwing me under the bus," Kaleb mutters, a smug note to his voice. 

Lizzie turns her head to glare at him.

"Then here's a push for you," Josie now says, a slight smirk to her lips. She moves her hand in a familiar motion. "Look up."

Lizzie's stomach drops. She and Kaleb both listen, staring at the frame of the doorway. A green leaf starts to materialize as if out of thin air, and then there's a full sprig with white berries hanging right above them, now uncloaked.

"Did you know that was there?" Kaleb asks without looking away from the mistletoe.

"No," she says. "I didn't."

Her heart has changed its pace, no longer a slight jump of worry at Josie being mad at her, but hitting against her ribs as the realization comes crashing down on her. A flurry of what she can only describe as wings starts up in her stomach, pressing against every little nervous button inside of her. 

She groans in her head. Of course this is happening. She got so momentarily caught up in helping him with his plan, with helping Josie, and Hope, and Landon, that it was so easy for her feelings for Kaleb to slip to the back of her mind instead of pulling at her for her attention like they've been doing everytime she sees him.

The possibility of accidentally ending up under the mistletoe with the guy she likes somehow never crossed her mind. Too much really has been going on lately.

Her eyes dart back at Josie just as Hope leans in, pressing a light kiss to her cheek. It sends Josie's eyes wide, and she practically freezes.

Lizzie scowls. Of course they would go along with it. Now she can't back out of it.

She forces herself to look at Kaleb to find him already watching her. That does nothing good for her heartbeat. 

Raising a shoulder in a shrug, she offers a smile that she desperately hopes doesn't convey the mess of feelings inside of her right now.

"See? Oldest trick in the book. It even got us."

Kaleb chuckles at that, nodding as he glances away. Her heart skips a beat as he bites his bottom lip for a split second.

When his eyes move back to her, she quickly holds onto them, refusing to look anywhere else. She has been doing so well for the last few weeks. A damn plant can't be about to throw her whole promise to herself and plan about no crushes away, surely. 

"Just a social convention, right?" Kaleb says, a smile playing on his lips. She tries not to focus on that.

"Yeah, totally," she agrees, smiling back.

He nods once then pauses for just a second before he starts to lean in. Air catches in Lizzie's throat, and for another split second, she thinks that maybe this won't be a big deal. Maybe she's underestimating herself.

She meets him halfway, her eyes closing before she even moves. The second their lips meet, she knows she's screwed.

Maybe if he wasn't a good kisser or if her skin didn't immediately heat up, feeling as if it's catching fire. But for the few seconds that it takes for them to pull apart, the mistletoe still hanging tauntingly above them, Lizzie knows her feelings weren't all in her head.

She pulls back slowly, letting her eyes open. Kaleb's already looking at her. Or gazing, she supposes, as her stomach ties itself in a knot and her heart beats like a butterfly's wings.

"Not so bad, was it?" he says, his tone joking but a genuine smile curving his lips once more.

"Not at all," she breathes softly and shrugs. "All in the name of the holiday spirit." 

Kaleb raises an eyebrow. "I thought people only said that when they're pretending it's not a big deal? Your words."

"Yeah, and I was right." 

She doesn't wait for the realization to kick in. She winds a hand around to the back of his neck and surges back in.

There's a time-stopping moment of worry on her part and surprise on his when her lips are on his and she questions what the hell she's doing.

Then he's kissing her back, not just for the mistletoe that's already starting to disappear again, its goal achieved. Her entire plan goes out of the window.

With the chance of rejection decreasing with every second that Kaleb doesn't pull away, she thinks that maybe she doesn't need to refrain from a relationship for the rest of the semester. 

Kaleb isn't Rafael and he isn't Sebastian.

There's no reason that this can't work out.

She curses in her mind at the realization that she might have to give credit to a freaking plant and those three oblivious idiots who have already left, laughing their asses off.

[rosereview]

Ketch-Up: Jan - Mar 2020

Okay so I’ve been terrible at this blog thing, only posting sometimes, but I guess that’s why I have it, it’s just for me to post shit when I feel like it. So I decided to do this new Ketch-Up series for whenever I want to talk about a bunch of stuff at once. So a lot has happened at the start of 2020, musically, in the book world and with TV. So my plan is to just talk about certain things in each category and see what happens. 

Movies:

Since getting Netflix for Christmas, I have been watching a lot of stuff. There are five movies I’d specifically like to talk about, which I watched from January till the beginning of March, but these are by no means even half of the amount of movies I watched, just the ones I need to write about.

6 Balloons

So I started watching this after I finished Now You See Me 2 and I just wanted more Dave Franco because I love him, so 6 Balloons popped up as being one of his recent films and I decided to watch it after being intrigued with the synopsis. Firstly, I was not expecting it to be scripted and filmed the way it was. It was super emotional and I have mixed feelings about it, although I do not regret watching it. It’s major theme is addiction, so if you're not into that, or it may trigger you, don’t watch it because that’s all it’s about. I really did like the brother and sister dynamic that it had, but the whole journey that the main character goes through to help her brother is stressful and it had this creepy stress reliever audio going on in the sister’s head which really put me off, but was powerful at the same time.

Miss Americana

This one is the documentary of Taylor Swift and I loved it. I thought it was so interesting and even watched it again with my mom because I thought that Taylor’s story was such an intriguing one. I really understand now where she was at with the Reputation album and the reason for the song choices she had. At first I was not a big Taylor Swift fan except for the occasional song, but now I gotta say that with this Lover era and Taylor being more open and using her voice for what she believes in, I may become a full blown Swifty. 

P.S. I Still Love You

The sequel to To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before is a rom com, based off of the YA book series, which I have read and enjoyed. The first movie was really great which I have watched more than once, so I was expecting good things from this next movie. And it definitely wasn’t bad, but I did not fully enjoy the second book, so it’s not surprising that I didn’t love this movie. I’m just a big Peter Kavinsky fan and when John Ambrose McClaren shows up, I just cringe. Also Lara Jean is more cringy in this movie because of the way she plays both John and Peter and is practically running away from her problems with Peter, and reliving baby school romance with John Ambrose. I just think the idea of liking a guy that you had a crush on when you were ten is so stupid because no one is the same person from when they were ten, and all those “moments” that you had were really nothing more than two kids hanging out! I would rather have just had the first book be a standalone I think.

Marriage Story

This movie is really sad. It won an Oscar so I thought I should look into it. I saw it on Netflix and really liked the plot so I watched it and boy was it ever sad. The whole plot is about divorce and the whole experience and journey to actually getting a divorce and how it is so easy for it to get messy even with two adults who are still friends. I thought it was a very well made movie and I loved both Scarlett Johanson and Adam Driver in it. They did so well. 

Crazy Stupid Love

This was one of my more recent watches and I was pleasantly surprised with the way the story went. I really liked a lot of the elements of the story, but some parts did make me feel uncomfortable. Like the babysitter having a crush on the dad and was going to send him nudes, while his son had a major crush on her. It was just really weird, but the overall themes of family were really sweet, and the same goes for the friendship the dad had with the young guy in the bar who started to date his oldest daughter. But overall it was really good. 

TV Shows:

Formula One: Drive to Survive Seasons 1 & 2

As our first real Netflix watch, my family and I got addicted to this docuseries. I thought it was interesting and amazing for the whole first season and when the second season came out, it just got better. In the second season we got to see the bigger formula one teams as well as all of the drama with the smaller teams and see the totally different worlds with the ones with money and the ones without. It was honestly an amazing ride and I can’t wait for the next season.

Sherlock Season 1

This is the other full season that I watched in these three months and I got to say that I really enjoyed it. Honestly some parts freaked me out, but overall I loved learning and seeing Sherlock and Watson grow together. The mysteries were all very intriguing and made me want more and I will definitely continue watching through the next seasons.

Books:

This list is without my most recent read, Chain of Gold by Cassandra Clare, because I have a whole other post/review for that one, so if you want to hear my thoughts, check it out, either on my post list, or scrolling down to the post before this one!

Beartown by Fredrik Backman

This book was amazing! The way it was written was literally the most powerful thing I have ever experienced. This book does deal with heavy subjects, but the way it is told is so cool, showing everyone’s perspective. If you get the chance to read this, then do it because it will change you.

Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor

So this book I had heard so many good things about so I was excited to read it, but the problem was that I have been in kind of a reading slump, and starting a new fantasy series is never the smartest thing to do when that happens. But I had heard great things, so I thought that this book would get me out of that slump, but it epicly failed. It was a good book and I enjoyed the plot, but there was nothing supper exciting or special about it. I think I’ll still read the second book, but it’s not high on my priority list. It just wasn’t the best time for me to read it I guess.

China Rich Girlfriend by Kevin Kwan

This book was fun to read. I had been wanting to read it ever since I finished Crazy Rich Asians, but just hadn’t gotten the time to, but I’m glad I finally have because it’s such a nice fluffy read, filled with drama, but you don’t really have to think during the read. It’s a perfect reading slump read. Definitely recommend the series, it’s a ride in a good way. 

Catharsis: Pain by Rowan Dugray

This book is actually all poetry which is very outside of my comfort zone, but a girl I knew in high school wrote this so I had to buy it and read it. I got to say that I was really impressed and I really liked a lot of the poems. Lots of them were very thought provoking and relatable, while others were just very sad and painful. But that’s the beauty of poetry, it’s pure emotion and abstract feelings put into words.

Romanov by Nadine Brandes

This one was also a slow read, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t enjoyable. It was actually very educational and I loved seeing the way that Russia was during the revolution. It was a slow burn type of book, but the characters were fun people to read about and see interact, so that made up for the lesser plot points in the book. I loved the end and thought it was a very good book overall. 

Music:

These are just a few of the songs and artists that I had a lot of feelings about and which came out during these months. 

Faouzia- The Road

The Road was Faouzia’s first song out in 2020, but I also want to talk about her many singles that came out in 2019 as well because wow! I love Faouzia and all of her songs are just so powerful and beautiful. I need an album from her ASAP because I get literally too excited for new singles to come out and it’s almost toture waiting. She also posts her ‘work-in-progress’ snip-its and I literally just keep relistening to them when I get a craving for Faouzia and new music. When she comes out with an album, I will definitely listen to it on repeat. 

Olivia O’Brien- The Results of My Poor Judgement

So at first I wasn’t sure about these mixtape things Olivia was starting to come out with, especially with the first one that was released at the end of last year. It was called “A Sad Fucking Summer” I think, and I wasn’t like really impressed, until this next mixtape came out. This mixtape, “Results of My Poor Judgement” has three songs on it, unlike the first one that only had two, and I am in love with all three! Literally they are just so good and I can’t stop listening to them. Josslyn is a literal bitch fest that makes me so happy, while the other two just hit hard in the emotions while they are still great bops. I don’t know how she does it!

Katy Perry- Never Worn White

For this one, I saw the video first when it was released and the number one viewed video on YouTube. At first I was confused because I didn’t know Katy Perry was engaged, and I was like this is for sure a wedding song. And then I got to the end of the video… and she’s pregnant! It was her pregnancy reveal, and I thought it was the most beautiful thing ever. I am a sucker for personal songs that show the singer's personal life and obviously have a lot of meaning to them. That’s probably why I never really liked Katy Perry’s newest stuff before, because it’s never felt really real to me and more just to make a pop album. But to see Katy Perry in this video, singing this song, made me so happy, especially since she was like my idol when I was little and now she’s growing up and moving on in life and it’s just really nice to see.

Julia Michaels- Heartless

I am a big Julia Michaels fan. (Not as big as a Halsey fan, but I do love Julia!) So until Julia starts releasing her own projects again, like hopefully a Inner Monologue Part 3, I will have to settle for collabs like this one. Honestly though, I really like this song and it’s got a lot of feeling to it while still making you want to get up and dance. It’s just a really good country number and I hope Julia does more country, because she sounds good in it.

Alec Benjamin- Narrated for You and These Two Windows

So the newest favourite artist I found these three months was Alec Benjamin! I love the newer music he’s releasing right now and can’t wait for his new album to come out in April, but also I discovered his debut album, which I was really impressed with. Lately I’ve been feeling like I haven’t had any good male artists in my phone that I’m supper obsessed with, like Ed Sheeran. But I’m hoping with this new year that changes and I already see it starting to, especially when I find good ones like Alec Benjamin. 

Noah Cyrus- I Got So High That I Saw Jesus

I feel like this will be a good year for Noah Cyrus. It’s high time for a debut album from her, or even another EP, but I just need something because her newest music has just been stellar. I was worried at first that her brand would be more in the rap or emo stuff, but her music has been more my kind of music, slower and softer tunes with lots of feels. This song definitely shows that side of her and I love it.

If you made it to the end, thanks for reading my thoughts! I know it was long and probably boring, but oh well. 

Until next time!

~Rose Reviews

[sparda3g]

Attack on Titan Chapter 124 Review

It has been a stellar year for the series. I would argue it’s the best so far. I would also argue that it will end next year with the final anime season debuting next fall. It will be fantastic. As the year coming to an end, the holidays is around the corner. For the last chapter of the year, Isayama-sensei shared his holiday spirit with his fans with more of stellar content. It may be a coincidence, but I like to think that way.

The last chapter’s effect is still jarring. I’m still blown away by the revelation. If there’s a picture that described me perfectly, it’s the chapter’s cover with Annie’s father in PATHS. Even at Marley, he felt the presence of the tyrant known as Eren, and received the message that everyone will die. Others in the crowd also felt the effect. At least they received the memo, so they can die knowing. Seriously though, the endgame is here.

The good news is, Reiner is back. The bad news is, Reiner is back. I said this because his suffering continues, now with the sight of the world’s end. If that wasn’t enough, Falco was taken away by Connie and Jean. I remember a scene where it looked like Gabi was going to get killed off with Reiner shouting and all. Of course, that would put a smile on some fans’ face. That being said, she was actually in danger, but Reiner saved her. His armor came undone once the walls were destroyed. It’s an interesting note on its own, but it’s proven later to be incredibly essential.

Poor Reiner once again failed to do something, whether it’s to prevent the world’s ending or protect the kids. I want Isayama to end his misery, somehow, someway. At least he’s not alone in suffering. Add Gabi to the mix with Falco missing and words from Reiner that pretty much say, “The world will die…forever.” I love the guy, but he’s the last person to go for comforting words. True, with Eren in control of all titans, no one can touch him, but this is such a downer.

Reiner passes out, but Gabi has acquired Eren’s special trait: refuse to quit. After all, she is drawn based on him in a way. She’s off to bring Marley’s warriors back alone. I got to credit Isayama for developing her well; growing up to a proper warrior. I know she started off really rough, but it was intentional and she has gotten a lot better for a child who was manipulated. It gets better later on as well. Plus, she took good care of Reiner with food and blanket. Can’t hate on that.

The scene with Survey Corps regroup is really good. It turns out Jean and Connie did retrieve Falco, which would be tough for Gabi. What I like about this scene is the realistic reactions and damning questions that stemmed from long-term build-up. Jean sees Eren’s action as the consequence for the world to take on Paradis Island; constantly citing them as the devil.

Have they give them a glimmer of hope, this action may have been prevented. The startling part is if the Survey Corps had a chance to prevent it. One would argue they did, but they didn’t approach to Eren in a way that would have wise him down. One would argue they did nothing wrong. I can’t really fault anyone; even Mikasa in the last chapter. It was tough to read Eren. Hell, I was trying to wrap my head around with clues and ideas on his agenda.

The sickening part is, despite the fact Eren is aiming to mass genocide the world, it will benefit Paradis Island because his friends lived there. In other words, this is “fine” for Survey Corps; technically, they don’t have to do anything. They can sit back and enjoy the fireworks with red liquid spreading. It’s crazy when you think about the genre. Shounen focuses on the theme of friendship. Eren is certainly true to the core, but never would I thought on this level of mayhem. It’s riveting to see a different exploit on the said theme.

Although I said they don’t have to do anything, there are normal titans killing their people right now. I’m not sure if we are supposed to be questioning on the thought of Eren not controlling them, but Zeke was the one that controlled them. Perhaps it’s due to royal blood that they are negated from the Founder’s control. Then again, it’s probably best to keep this in mind. After this chapter, all clues, hints, and builds should not be taken lightly. Before stopping them, they have to do something about Falco.

It’s sad to hear them talking about feeding someone like Pixis with Falco to “resurrect” them. Yes, he’s an enemy, but as a fan spectator, this blows. It heats up really quickly, because Connie now has the chance to rescue his mother. I was wondering how that subplot will play out, but this is a direction that left me shaky. I credit Armin to try to avoid a possible clash by keeping Falco alive. Eren is practically factory resetting the world, so they might as well start over “fresh.” As good that may sound, Connie wasn’t having it.

All the build-ups to Connie leads to the outburst that have him running away from his friends, taking Falco. It made sense sadly. The guy went through so many hell and back without dying. He lost friends, death or backstabbed, and the one opportunity to save his mother was about to be lost. These developments matter so much; like a video game with picking the choice to define a character’s personality. As much as I appreciate Armin, he had no rights to speak. He was resurrected, yet he’s telling him he has no rights to do that. Can’t argue a shattered man. What a corrupted world.

Although there’s a massive-sized titan army, there are normal ones causing damages. Honestly, it’s the best part; well, minus the ending. The reason is due to the old familiar nature of the series. Not to say it lost its foundation, but the familiar atmosphere is a nice callback. The terror and devastation of titans are once more pronounced in its last ride.

Yelena looks defeated with her blank expression. I had a feeling it was coming, now that her dream is shattered into pieces. I’m not sure why Zeke wasn’t controlling the titans. Maybe he’s still unconscious or just gave up altogether. In any case, she and the faction are in trouble. Speaking of faction, those who backstabbed Shadis recently are also in trouble. Karma is on full throttle; however, not all deserved.

If there are people that don’t deserve it, it would be the Braus Family. What struck me hard is the very titan that’s attacking them is Nile. It pains me when I realized who it was. He was one of the few reasonable men that were kind enough to help the enemy. Now look at him. It’s tragic. The sensation grows darker with Kaya trapped with a titan; reminiscing the scene when she lost her family. This was like a sick joke. But it’s redeemed when the scene was truly repeated.

Gabi shoots down the titan with that powerful rifle of hers. For once, I’m glad the training benefits her well. She charges right at it, aim inside the mouth, and blast the hell out of it. I have to admit, the way how she gunned it down was pretty damn cool. Sad for Nile, but it’s best to put him to sleep. The moment reminds Kaya of Sasha, when she saved her. History repeats itself in a crazy way. It speaks volume on Gabi’s action. She didn’t have to save them, but after her developments, it made sense why. It pays off well.

What I really like is how the family continues to be possibly the best family in the series. The father still cares for Gabi despite all the mishaps. I am aware that they don’t want any more fighting, but this is comforting for once. On top of that, there’s a moment when soldiers ask them if Gabi is the same girl from the opposing side, and the one that defends her is Kaya. She lies about the identity and Nicolo joins in to explain the gunfire was his action. They bought the story and proceed to protect the family. That’s rewarding in many ways.

It showcase how family can stick together, even in the darkest day. It also shows how one can forgive another. It’s something you see in many series, but this one was done well, especially when considering their age. Both are young and trying to understand the reality. Gabi learned a lot, yet still challenged on the morality. Same can be said for Kaya for she doesn’t understand why Gabi saved her. Not to mention, she did try to kill her. That could have been karma itself, but fate brought them together once again.

These kids are lost on their sense of morale. With their bloodlust thoughts or action, what does that make them? The devil? It’s normal for them to feel conflicted. Nicolo puts it best: we all have a demon inside. Call it cheesy or not, it fits well with the series’ nature. It’s not like it was said to adults, so this was executed properly. I like the moral. It’s simple but relatable and understanding.

The new cadets are about to meet their end. I know I said they are dealing with karma, but I think this was going too far. Luck has it for them, because someone arrives to save the day. Out of all people, it’s Shadis, the same guy they pummeled badly. But it’s nothing personal; what matters the most is saving lives. The man is a true trooper. To think, he recovered quickly to save those who backstabbed him. I know it was on a whim, but broken trust can be unforgiving. This moment was really nice.

I wouldn’t mind Yelena biting the dust, but lucky for her, I suppose, Survey Corps does come to rescue her and the faction. They did have a cool entrance with a nice angle shot from the inside building. Jean has become a true leader with his commands and leads. He has everyone back on their feet, rally up to fight back. The growth of these characters are paying off nicely.

The best part of this retro sensation is the action. It’s been a long time since we last have human versus titan action. This is a pleasant treat to enjoy. The Survey Corps rally up and spring into combat; just like the good old times. They may be using updated weaponry, such as spears, but it doesn’t take away the nostalgia.

The emotional set piece comes in when Pixis and others approach to Armin and Jean. It hits them with the callback to the time when Eren was positioned as the savior. They must do the only option: putting them to sleep. Before finishing them, Armin and others express their gratitude, thanking Pixis for guiding them. It sucks that he and others have to die, but it’s possibly the best sendoff or burial they can get as titans. Rest in Peace to everyone who has transformed but never forget who they were.

If there’s one person that I hoped didn’t make it out alive, it would most certainly be Floch. The amount of disappointment I felt when he reappears can’t be measured. That punchable face of his irritates me to no end. Even Jean low-key hates the fact he survived; he speaks for us fans. He’s all excited for the end of the world. All the sudden, he points a gun at depressed Yelena and order her to gather the volunteers for he will arrest them. What the hell is with him? I pray this leads to his demise for his stupidity running too deep. Whether it’s Yelena’s time to die or his, I’m ready to say, “…And nothing valuable was lost.”

I didn’t expect Gabi to reunite with Armin and Mikasa, but I’m actually happy for this development. It’s a good thing they didn’t have a fallout or any bad blood left. Despite the world coming to an end, it sure has plenty of uplifting moments from many fronts. The only downside is Falco is held hostage by Connie. I know Gabi isn’t liked as far as I’m concerned, but I do feel sympathy for her. Again, she’s a child that was manipulated coming undone but sadly caused wrongful actions. She doesn’t want to fight anymore; at the very least, reunite with Falco, who promised to be her man.

There’s some interesting notes coming from Gabi’s outburst. If Eren has become the Founding Titan, couldn’t he revert back titans to their old self? I don’t think it’s possible unless it’s confirmed one day, but if so, that is a good point. It’s pretty telling on her development when she pleads Armin to stop Eren from destruction since fighting is no good. If she was like her old self, she would be thrilled, though her family is still in peril, but you get my point. Lastly, going back to first point, if Eren can undo the effect, does hardening counts as one? This chapter is packed with greatness, but the ending is undoubtedly the show stealer.

The one point that stood out to Armin was the mention of Reiner’s armor coming undone. He remembers Eren saying all hardening will dissolved and turns out, he’s right once he reign the titans. At that moment, I was muttering to myself if this means what I think it means. For our last gift of the year, Annie has officially returned. It’s about time. What was seen as a running gag has come to an end. This is how you end the year with a bang.

What a year. In anime, it had an incredible season with the announcement of the final season. In manga, it delivered top notch quality content; keeping it strong like its heyday. Some would even say it’s even better. Regardless, it end the year with a great chapter. The nostalgic tone was riveting, the developments were paying off, for better or worse, the presentation is pretty solid with heartfelt moments, and the action was exciting. Next year already looks very promising. Here’s to the new year with possibly one last ride.

[sol1056]

My ask box continues to fill up, and I have no answers for any of this. I’ve gotten comments that @dreamworksanimation is good about things like fair representation in other shows when it comes to disability, queer relationships, racial diversity, and just plain solid storytelling. Why was @voltron the exception? 

Or you can just have the questions from my asks:

I really, really wanted [Dreamworks execs] to address the situation, to tell us why VLD took that enormous shitty turn and to apologize and do us better. But I'm guessing we already know the answer (arrogant inexperienced EPs) and I think they won't do anything about it, just try to fade Voltron to the background as it's ending and focus on She-ra, if they ever decide to apologize, they're just gonna focus on the LGBT rep as if its the worst problem of their story.

You know what, I hope someone makes an extensive list of all the morally questionable messages Voltron has sent with all its characters (Shiro & Kuron everything, and Lotor as abuse victim in particular), all in detail and shove them in their faces saying, but to you it's 2 guys in love and in a healthy relationship that is wrong, instead of ableism, racism, homophobia, etc. When I think of what the kids will take from Voltron I feel sick. But queer love is the problem here, right. I’m disgusted.

Us: can we get a happy ending too like the het people and couples in the show?

VLD: no, not a happy or even semi-happy ending, you'll get a miserable ending but get this, we're going to write the last survivor of the 4 queer characters we killed off to be totally on board with this. We'll write him and animate him as if he's happy and got resolution, growth, and catharsis and not as if he got demoted, sidelined, isolated, discarded by his family, worst of all by Keith. We'll say a monster like him can’t be a paladin.

Let’s also go back to talking about how they not only made Lotor, a victim of child abuse not to mention biracial character who grew up with everything against him: suddenly evil, be the same as his abusive "father" and "mother" (who even after remembering who he is pulled the same crap as before), took every happiness away from him and had the nerve to mock his abuse in S7?! As a child abuse survivor I'M HORRIFIED.

The messages in the Shiro/Adam scene is disgusting, this is such a difficult subject, even for adults show with plenty time to explore and be fair to both characters while being explicit about it all. I was worried: in a kids’ show? how can they write this in a way they'll get it? With barely time for it? but look what they wrote, Adam gave an ultimatum instead of support and died, then they blamed the disabled guy for everything. Message: you’re gay so your relationship and your life are worthless, you'll be miserable and alone.

For a team that is all about working together, voltron members after 7 seasons still don't feel like a family and more like colleagues from work. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It feels odd knowing that they weren't actually battling homophobic higher ups. It feels more tactical and greedy for social justice points than out of genuine desire to showcase diversity. Is it coincidence that the character they dislike the most is the one selected for this honor? As a lesbian fan i'm skeptical and angry and refuse to watch anything else by these two.

People keep trying to excuse this stuff with "Voltron is a kids' show", but you know what? There are gay kids out there. There are disabled kids out there. Much as we may wish it otherwise, there are kids out there experiencing trauma. Do we REALLY want to teach those little kids that they are broken and tainted forever and nothing good is waiting for them in the world from here on out? People need to know how damaging it is to have ZERO stories in media showing realistic healing of trauma.

The lady who betrayed them got a proper send off scene even tho she send Adam & the others like pigs to slaughter & betrayed them & caused them all to almost lose and die. Got screentime & some characterization. But sure why respect Adam that way too. I will never forget the dread I had for him when I saw he was with the fighters who were sent to die, then watched them one by one lose their lives until he too, was killed. I still feel sick thinking about it. We never even learned his last name.

I know it's been a while but I'm not over how they treated Lotor in s6. I'm from a broken and dysfunctional home and this show I watch for escapism told me I'm doomed to repeat the same mistakes of my parents, end up just like them. ... Are they even aware of the messages they send to their audience? Not all of us had good childhood like Allura.

From a chronically ill perspective, I felt downright insulted by the choice they made to give Shiro a degenerative illness. The idea of a chronically ill hero is cool but they pull the cure narrative, they don't give him a real illness, and it's just used for cheap irrelevant drama. Plus the whole "Has to choose between loved ones and goals" thing was pretty insensitive, we're already expected to sacrifice so much as ill people so the reinforcement of that was unpleasant to watch and read meta on.

Even if everyone was white cishet abled guy the messages sent to kids were awful: One who fought to carve his own path was forced to become someone else, one who suffered and fought till the end was told he’s a monster that can’t be a paladin, the insecure one will never be worthy as himself and he'll always be someone else’s replacement, one who survived genocide and suffered loss upon loss until reduced to nothing, one who suffered by his parents’ hand became like them, the whole Kuron thing. You cant brush off all THAT.

going into the new semester with the horrible messages of s7 on my mind...i’m lethargic. i have been since the “retired paladin” interview. it was bad for me to balance my mental health on the state of a fictional character, but it was really effective. Until that awful message that disabled people are helpless in controlling their own lives. I’m trying to disconnect and thrive anyway, out of spite against ableism if nothing else.

I had this horrible realization: you know how Shiro is a victim of abuse and him getting the Black Lion was him regaining the control the lack of he suffered in his capture? I think they gave him the illness and handwaved it with the clone, so as to argue for his removal from the Black Lion. They claim that the reason he wanted control was the illness and not the victimization in the Galra hands. They're essentially erasing his trauma.

Writers: so we'll write endearing multidimensional characters with many layers, we'll have them subvert stereotypes, especially those that characters like them usually are written with, ie. Keith isn't a loner nor is he angry just 'cause, but a lonely abandoned kid with trust issues due to his mom leaving him, thus has poor emotional control and anger management, struggles to connect and open up, he is the one whose arc embodies the found family theme more than anyone. 

EPs: nah we want stereotypes loool

We talk about Shiro and all the ableism in his story but we don't talk nearly enough about how horrifying the message is that Keith is the one to take it all from him and kick him aside. Keith chose to discard Shiro because he's broken and useless, so he can take his place. I've been through things they both have and I find all that horrifying. S7 sent terrible messages to kids watching.

They had the chance to let Shiro overcome and be a hero. To defeat his own abuser (Sendak) except Keith takes over everything and fixes everything for him while he lies helpless on the ground without a new arm yet. They had the budget. The animation. They could have empowered Shiro. They saw how many people saw themselves in Shiro's struggle. They must have seen the concerns. And they actively chose to go against that.

The Bury Your Gays trope is even worse this season when you consider the heavy lesbian subtext with Lotor's former generals who get blown up on screen. And naturally, it's the one with a crush on Keith who turns good and survives.

Was there a minority that hasn't been screwed over? Bury Your gays was merely the last shocking straw, because the whole season was chockful of terrible messages and proved they would never treat their characters right and address stuff from before. Homophobia, racism, ableism, sexism, mocking of abuse, excusing abandonment & so on.

I’m adding my voice because I'm so, so tired. None of the characters i see on screen are the characters we got to know in s1/2. The character i most related to was beaten down out of spite for 4 seasons and now may as well be a cardboard cutout. DW and the EPs don't seem to give a single shit about how badly this season has affected people. i don't know whether to jump ship or spit fire over everything. i'm just... exhausted.

I want a transparent statement & apology from DreamWorks. I want to know THEIR stance & role in this, ALL the events that ended up with us getting a show that is not only homophobic but also ableist, racist, mocks child abuse and so much more. I want them to acknowledge & explain why they allowed the marketing team to bait fans with ship content in their videos, thumbnails and even that EP interview about shipping. I want to know who and why allowed the show to to take a worse direction in recent seasons.

I have no answers for any of this, @dreamworksanimation. If there are any explanations, any reassurances that you’ll work hard to prevent any repeat, you need to say so. The longer you’re silent, the more it looks like you’re fine with the story and all its horrific messages. Are you?

[marvelousbirthdays]

Happy Birthday, bellemeri!

December 5 - Bucky/Darcy, Bucky/Jemma or Bucky/Steve, something smutty or fluffy or both wink maybe with “What’s in it for me?” for @bellemeri

Written by @thestarfishdancer

“Sergeant Barnes?  Could I possibly beg a favor of you?”

Bucky turns from where he’d been rummaging around in the pantry at the pleasantly-accented yet hesitant voice, finding the owner to be one of the recent additions to the team that came with Steve’s not-as-dead-as-previously-believed buddy Coulson. Come to think of it, that kind of seemed to be a theme with Steve, once you counted that speedster twin of Wanda’s and himself.  

The pretty brunette shuffles her feet and seems to wilt slightly, opening her mouth as if to draw the question back. It prompted Bucky to realize that he not only hadn’t answered her question, since he was frowning in thought, he might be coming across as … unfriendly. And since he was trying to work on what Darcy called his “resting scary face”, he should probably get to responding.

“Sorry, what? I wasn’t exactly paying attention,” he admits sheepishly, feeling a bit of relief when she seems to perk up again. “And it’s Doctor…?”

“Simmons,” she supplies helpfully, bouncing a little on her feet.

“Doctor Simmons,” he repeats to make sure he remembers.”

“Oh, you don’t need to stand on ceremony. Everyone just calls me Simmons. Or Jemma, if you’d prefer. I’d hoped you might be able to do me a favor.”

She’s kind of adorable, and also very attractive. He’d noted it to himself more than once when he’d seen her around the base, and it’s much more evident now that she’s not just a glimpse from across the room. It’s enough to have him digging for the charm that once came easily to him, before the war and Hydra.

“What’s in it for me?” he asks, and he’s rewarded for his teasing tone by the flight blush that rises to her cheeks.

“A great deal of gratitude from me, and the chance to hold it over Captain Rogers’ head, since he was supposed to be my test subject?”

He’s immediately wary, and it must darken his face, because she’s laying a light hand on his cybernetic arm, a sincere expression coming over her face.  “You’re certainly welcome to say no. I’d just hoped to test the vaccine as soon as possible, as it were, and both Captain Rogers and Nat have been called out on a mission for a few weeks at least, and since you’re enhanced as well… but never mind. It was a terrible idea. Please forget I asked.”

She begins backing away, and he catches her arm, careful to keep his grip light so she doesn’t feel like she can’t pull away.

“Vaccine?”

She nods. “Yes. For the substance that some of the team got hit with at the A.I.M. base raid last month. It didn’t affect Captain Rogers as badly as the others and he metabolized it quicker, so he’s been helping me with tests.”

“Dosed with… wait, are you talking about the sex pollen?”

She blushes a bit more, but smiles and rolls her eyes a little. “There’s no such thing as sex pollen. The team was simply hit with a very strong aphrodisiac in powder form that proved a significant distraction.”

“Yeah,” Bucky says emphatically.  “The sex pollen. I can’t believe Steve didn’t tell me that he was testing it. Or Darcy. I can’t believe she didn’t blab.”

“Me too,” the good doctor says ruefully, and Bucky can’t help but laugh. “In any case, I seem to have had some success in creating a vaccine to prevent the reaction, and it would be helpful to know before a team is sent in to raid more than a thankfully-empty base.”

Bucky becomes somber at that. They could have lost people, good people, if the base hadn’t been abandoned, given the state of those dosed. Entranced by their own arousal for nearly an hour, Steve had said, like sitting ducks, whereas he’d been more under control.

“Alright,” he says. “We can give it a try.”

“Are you sure?” she asks. “I don’t want you to feel like a lab rat.”

“Yeah,” he says, then repeats more confidently. “Yeah. Hold it over Steve’s head an’ all that.”

She smiles, bright and wide, and damn but if that isn’t a good look on her. “Thank you! If you’ll follow me, Sergeant Barnes, I don’t think it will take more than forty-five minutes, maybe, or an hour, of your time.”

“Bucky,” he says, abandoning his search for the chocolate he knows Clint is hiding to follow her down the hall. “Or James, if you’d prefer.”

“Which do you prefer?” she asks, tilting her head curiously.

“I’m not sure.” He’s not sure what prompted the honestly, but he continues with a shrug. “Bucky feels like a different person, sometimes, but also…”

“Like an old jumper that still fits, but not as well as it did before?”

“Yeah,” he says, looking at her in surprise. Her mouth is lifted into a half-smile, slightly sad, and he wonders what old name no longer fits like new for her.

He doesn’t get a chance to ask, however, as they arrive at her lab and she gets to bustling around, getting various monitoring equipment as she gestures at a stool and orders him out of his shirt. He winks at her as he pulls it off, delighting in her amused smile as she shakes her head at him.  Having him in the stool rather than the medical-type chair in the room is a nice gesture too; even hooked up to the machines, he doesn’t feel like he did in The Chair back in Hydra. And no one in Hydra ever pressed the electrodes to him with gentle hands, explaining what each was for in, or checked in to make sure he was still consenting to each step of the procedure, including a blood draw.

“Now, first I’ll need to measure your reaction to the drug, get a blood sample, and once it has been flushed, I’ll give you the vaccine and see if it prevents the reaction. I won’t spray the …pollen…all willy-nilly like A.I.M.’s device.”

He nods, and she dons a mask before taking what he recognizes as an asthma inhaler out, handing it to him and instructing him to inhale just the one spray. He does, and the reaction, while mild, is instantaneous. There’s a pleasant buzzing under his skin, his heart rate jumps up a couple of notches, and he suspects his pupils have blown wide by the face Jemma makes as she quickly shines a light in each of his eyes.  Oh, and he’s hard beneath his jeans. Almost painfully so.

It’s enough that the quick sting of the needle as Jemma draws blood is barely noted. Instead he’s thinking of those competent gentle hands sweeping over his skin, clutching at his back as he lifted her up against him, those gorgeous legs of hers wrapping around his waist to pull him closer. Of pressing her up against the wall so he could push the crisp white lab coat off her shoulders and unbutton her blouse, to feel her arch against him as he freed her breasts to take a pert nipple into his mouth, grinding into her…

The pleasant burn fades as his metabolism burns through the drug, just as it was getting good.

“Whoa,” he says. “I can see how that could be distracting.”

“I take that to mean the effects have worn off?”

“Yeah,” he says.

“Excellent,” she nods.  “Two minutes and twenty-seven seconds, just a little longer than Captain Rogers, and about a minute less than Nat, though I’m not sure how much is because of the enhancement formula used on each of you and how much is due to the female physiology, given the rodent test subjects also showed differences between male and female physiology.”  

She’s not really talking to him, more to herself as she some notes on a chart, so he takes the opportunity to wonder at her use of a nickname for his favorite Russian assassin. He’s really going to have to ask after that.

She asks him if he’s alright waiting a few minutes more, to ensure the drug is completely out of his system, before administering the vaccine. It ends up being longer, as he finds himself asking questions about her work as she begins running analysis on the first two blood samples. He likes how she gets animated, doing that little bounce thing again as she explains what each piece of equipment is doing, never talking down to him or treating him like he’s apt to go all Winter Soldier on her at the flip of the switch.  It’s a nice change.

They do get to the next test almost too soon for his liking, as she injects him with the vaccine before letting him dose himself again. This time, there’s no change. Not even a blip on the monitor. At his suggestion, they try it again after ten minutes to see if the vaccine is burned away by his metabolism as well, but it seems to be doing its job.

“Well, thank you, Sergeant Barnes… James,” she corrects at his raised eyebrow. “I think that’s a very positive sign for the vaccine and I can see about testing it on some ordinary humans in the near future. Though I apologize… it looks like I did end up drawing more than an hour of your time.”

“It’s fine, I didn’t mind,” he replies.

“Would you mind coming in, perhaps next week, so I can learn more about the length of time the vaccine works?”

“Not at all,” he says, pulling his shirt back on. He hopes he’s right about the source of her disappointment, because it’s what prompts his next question. “So… how does a guy go about seeing you before that? Say, for example, on Friday, for dinner somewhere that ain’t the mess hall?”

She stops in her tracks, surprise etching her face before that pretty blush rises to her cheeks again, making him think of all the sorts of ways he might make her flush. He leaves the lab with a date with a pretty Brit he plans to make damned sure is the first of many, a favor to hang over Steve’s head, and time enough to find that chocolate stash.

All in all, not a bad day.

[ofvivicnnes-blog]

                 hi everyone ! my name’s 𝖘𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖒 and i’m really happy and excited to be here ! i was in a group a v long time ago that had the points system before, so it’s really cool to be a part of a group that has a similar concept ( so shout out to the admins ) ! anyways, i’m 21+ and my pronouns are she/her, but they/them is okay as well. i’ve had kehlani’s mixtape on repeat pretty much since it came out, i have an affinity for writing intros at 2am while simultaneously working on editing themes, i’d let yeji choke me with her ponytails, and jackson wang owns my ass ! this is my very first time i’ll be playing kang seulgi after seeing exactly one (1) image of her on pinterest, and i hope i can do her justice with my mess of a child, vivienne ! 

“who are you & what is one thing that people would know you for ?” 

‘ i don’t know who i am -- i’m a lot of things. on the surface, i’m a daughter. i’m a former idol and a girl who’s still chasing her dreams. i’m vivienne, always, but i haven’t discovered who i am underneath all of that yet. one thing people know me for is my personal life. it’s not all that pretty. ’

“if there is one thing you could change about your career, what would it be ?”

‘ hm, i don’t know if there’s anything i would change, but i wish there were some moments i could have done a bit differently. my career as been great, but it’s nowhere near perfect and it never will be. ’

“what are you willing to do to be in the top ten ?”

‘ anything, but within reason. truth be told, i’m not afraid of anything that might get thrown my way, but i’m not saying i would throw someone under the bus ... not yet, anyways ! ’

name  :  vivienne ba-rom park.

nickname(s)  :  viv, vivi, & v.

age  :  twenty-four ( 24 ).

birthday  :  february 8th, 1995.

zodiac  :  aquarius.

moral alignment  :  chaotic neutral.

gender  :  cisfemale.

pronouns  :  she/her.

height  :  5′6″ ( five foot six inches ).

hometown  :  santa clarita, california.

nationality  :  korean-american.

ethnicity  :  korean.

occupation  : former k-idol, solo artist & dancer.

label(s)  :  the intangible concept, the lost soul & the sybarite.

aesthetics  :  glittery eyeshadow, roses on silk sheets, stained wine glasses, wire rimmed glasses, bare feet in the mornings, messy ponytails, ignored alarms, clear boots, shoes with red soles, messy bedrooms, diamonds, gold jewelry, oversized sweaters, strawberry chapstick under red lipstick, sexual tension, golden sunset, hickeys, long eyelashes & flushed cheeks, fuzzy socks, bright lights on a stage, disco balls, concerts, screaming until you lose your voice, love confessions, holding hands, sharp eyeliner, face masks, ripped denim jackets, fluffy clouds, drinking with friends, red wine, ignoring texts & making eye contact with someone you like.

          vivienne park was born on a cold ( california cold, that is ) february morning to na-young & nam-il park in santa clarita, california. vivienne was a happy baby that brought her parents joy, as they only had intentions to have one child and give them the world. if only the young couple knew that their daughter would grow up to be something like a thorn in their side, expensive perfume, 

          middle school was the time when the couple noticed a chance in their daughter. she wanted to be dropped off a block away from her school, she had a terrible habit of defying her school’s uniform dress code & mostly kept to herself, never inviting friends over for typical things like sleepovers. after watching from afar, vivienne’s parents questioned their daughter as to why she was acting this way. turns out, she didn’t like that her parents drove an older car in comparison to the other kids, whose parents drove newer & fancier cars. she thought the school’s uniform was stupid & it was hard for her to make friends with the other girls because she didn’t have the latest clothing trends or the latest gadgets.

          to put it simply, vivienne believed that she was supposed to have more & that she was ENTITLED to having more, but her parents weren’t able to provide that. her father was an elementary school teacher & her mom was a nurse, so the family lived comfortably, but nowhere near as lavishly as her classmates. vivienne wanted the pricey handbags & shoes, the beautiful blown-out hair & essentially whatever she wanted, so there were a lot of over the top arguments between vivienne & her parents whenever they said, ‘ no, vivienne. you cannot have a handbag that costs a semester’s worth of tuition. ’ 

          despite her slightly selfish & materialistic ways, vivienne was very interested in music at this time. she spent a lot of her time singing in her church’s choir & she was in the theater club at her school, so her life completely changed when she was introduced to k-pop by one of her friends in seventh grade. she immersed herself into the genre & became the girl who spent her time learning the choreography to her favorite songs. by the time high school rolled around, vivienne set her sights on becoming an idol & while her parents thought her dream was a little far-fetched, they eventually allowed vivienne to leave santa clarita for seoul in order to audition for one of the companies. 

          she lived with her aunt for a few weeks before she successfully auditioned ( at the age of fifteen ) & moved into the dorms with fellow trainees. vivienne thought she was doing well, but during her time as a trainee was the first time she felt constant rejection due to always being overlooked when it came to debuting. so, she trained hard for two years & debuted with her group NIGHTMARE x PARADISE in 2012 ! vivienne was the lead vocalist & rapper of the trio, went by ‘vivi’ & they debuted with their ep twinkle. NxP found success with their group & their debut was very well received. they remained together until early 2016, after vivienne was the last to debut as a solo artist with her ep i just wanna dance.

          after NxP’s breakup, vivienne’s bandmates found success in their new ventures, while vivienne slightly spiraled. she was now 21 & after spending the last four years with her bandmates, so she wasn’t really sure of what to do next. vivienne took a hiatus from music ( minus one song she released with far east movement titled don’t speak ) & she then found herself in a relationship with an idol from another company ( think jennie & kai with the way their ‘relationship’ was exposed ). hmm, if i’m being honest i’d love to have that as a wanted connection ( if it fits with your muse ! ) they tried keeping it on the down low since her boyfriend wasn’t supposed to be dating, but a few sneaky fans of his group snapped pictures of them leaving a hotel, so that sparked off a lot of controversy.

          vivienne’s boyfriend had been training to be an idol for a very long time & she didn’t want to be blamed for ‘ruining’ their career, so she decided to end the relationship after four months of dating secretly. one thing that continued to happen was the hate she received on her socials for dating the previously mentioned idol. vivienne liked to believe that she was a girl that didn’t allow anything to get to her, but the constant berating & harassment caused her to delete her accounts and move back to california, where she decided to debut as a solo artist. within a few weeks, vivienne found herself in yet another scandal when she was caught leaving a club with some prominent figure in los angeles, which caused her to fall under the scrutiny of the media & the public once again.

          she was dubbed as something of a sleaze, so she decided to start living up to that title. she returned to social media, but fans of vivienne during her NxP days were a little confused at her new personality ( which is all truly a well constructed act ). the scandal brought her some attention, so she released remember me, the theme song of the disney film coco in 2017. she released her first song as a solo artist, over my skin, in 2018 & signed to columbia records. currently, vivienne’s working on more music & other ventures, but doesn’t really know when she’s going to be releasing anything. vivienne currently lives in a super cute dtla apartment & she finally stopped being a punk towards her parents, so their relationship is better than ever !

          as for her personality, vivienne is very much the girl who puts on a facade. that’s not entirely weird when on stage because different eras usually means a different ‘personality’, but to the public she kind of carries herself as the girl who doesn’t care & she’s like a sexual deviant aka sexually liberated, but in reality she’s the polar opposite. to the public, she’s the girl who’ll be plastered on supermarket tabloids because she got a little too drunk at an album release party or she got papped with some other guy. in reality, she cares ( probably too much ) about what other people think of her, she hates when she feels like people are talking about her when she’s only a few feet away & she truly wants to be liked for who she is & not for what she can do. while her debut as a solo artist has been well received, she does sometimes get overwhelmed with the feeling that she’ll never reach that level of stardom again. tl;dr: she’s actually really nice & really wants to do well in her chosen career, especially now as a solo artist but she’s more than likely going about it the wrong way.

[des-shinta]

Discussing this publicly as...Y'see, me getting comments like this DM'd and Emailed to me?  That's why I even keep bringing Zi-O up or have stayed even tangentially involved.  it’s not to keep sniping at it, it’s putting out there that you can choose another target, as this horse is out of this race until it is all said and done. Hell, that was the entire point of the last post about it.  I’ve been through this song and dance and want people to stop bringing it to me. Though I am not calling out KaijucorpsTokuandrobots and his opinion of my work or in any way attempting to publicly shame him.  Frankly, his is the most civil DM I’ve received on this thus-far and why I have chosen to cite it. They have otherwise escalated to Death Threats for me not wanting to watch a show that It’s clear I won’t like. I just...I’m seriously just done with this fandom.  Marzgurl’s two twitter threads on  the missed concept of the ‘Ally of Justice’ are so on the ball for how bad it’s been getting. I WANT to do and have been doing exactly as KaijuKorpsTokuandrobots is demanding and leave it alone for others to hate or enjoy as they wish to, and as I stated my position and bowed out weeks ago I would like to leave it be.  I mostly have kept silent on my commentary since outside of...what, a handful of posts in the time it’s been running, not counting repetitions of the same subject such as the show being predictable, expanded reply threads, or snarking at crap? Though That’s part of why I format my videos and reviews the way I do, to better explain the positions I take.  The extended in-depth length is for those unfamiliar or familiar with the media to see more of it than is present in shorter-length ones that's just the opinion piece, with my perspectives and analysis set between the recap.  Doing this allows it to be more objective than others, and provide a better explanation for my perspective. It is not done to lead them to a subjective conclusion that ignores facts on a matter simply to make others opinions align with mine.  That’s just manipulative and arrogant and...well, if you knew me or paid attention to my conduct, you’d know that isn’t me. If I did and was, in the Kyoryuger videos I could’ve just said “you’re all wrong about Daigo”, instead of addressing how there were legitimate grievances one could have against him due to his character archetype being one that grates on a lot of people and super sentai overuses, and also ones that had been blown out of proportion in the face of those who have legitimately erred in the same fields Daigo was blamed for but didn’t actually do.  I could’ve just ignored the fandom complaints instead of acknowledging the reasonable ones and providing evidence against the ludicrous or exaggerated ones. For if you notice, I always supply evidence of why I have the perspective I do. For It has not nor has ever been about my opinion being the right one, it's about putting thought into one’s entertainment and seeing if it holds up under scrutiny.   That’s what a reviewer’s job is. I’m an analytical and introspective person, I THINK about things.  I LIKE Informing people about things, I believe facts and trivia are neat and fun to share, and media content regardless of genre, age or demographic that put in that extra effort to have all these big allusions to other work seamlessly woven into them and work for their story gives them a whole new layer of depth that is absolutely wonderful, especially if it is to other things I have enjoyed. And conversely, when I see something that has held itself to higher standards in the past acting as if it could not care less, I am compelled like many to call it out for that, and explain why that is. To paraphrase Linkara, “By teaching you how something is Bad, you learn how something is good, and if you are a creative type yourself, these are then tips to avoid creating something horrible.”

I don’t see how that can be viewed as being smug or any different than anyone else that does the reviewer thing, as my presenting of facts and the evidence supplied from interviews, analysis, data, records and what-not in the video content I make (and often these large blog posts)  is always divorced or set separately of my Opinion or snark about something so it is uniquely distinguishable on which is which.  My opinion does not superceed all of that, my opinion is a result of knowing and being aware of all of this, seeking out this information as I love to learn facts and trivia about stuff I enjoy, and presenting them all in a condensed collection of content. Analyzing the common themes, tropes and plots the writers on a show make use of in their original works (the Toshiki Inoue Drinking game, anyone?), and the conduct and statements they and the producers have made over the course of their careers inform the direction their work can take, as all of that can play a factor in the final product that results. And it’s not like I’ve never been wrong as a result of my research being erroneous or the knowledge I’ve gathered being faulty, and I’m more than capable of admitting it and have done so when told.  if you’ve seen my videos on the Garo Franchise, I’ve had to do so a number of times because there are Not a lot of good, Reliable sources on it, and some of them have misreported information or treated Fanon opinion as if it were canon fact without verification. In example I had believed that Shou Aikawa and Toshiki Inoue were the writers to The series Garo The Crimson moon because it was originally reported they were the only ones writing on it.  That turned out to not be so, and I was unaware of that as no-one had written differently in any of my usual resources.  That wasn’t malicious ignorance or smug self-assurance, but operating off of the information that had been provided.  Since that new information corrected me, I haven’t repeated something that wasn’t so.

But It is NOT about people lying to themselves about what they enjoy.  To cite the specific gripe, I don't think Kyuuranger fans are lying to themselves in liking it and have never at ANY point said that about THAT show or any other media, I think they didn't see what others, including myself, disliked about it or didn’t find it disagreeable themselves.  That’s not lying, that’s having a different perspective on it and what angers/annoys/frustrates others they don’t have a problem with. Everyone has a different perspective, I just put a lot of thought into explaining mine, why I have the gut reactions, revulsion or love I do for something.  That doesn’t make me automatically right, that’s giving you all the evidence to why my perspective is the way it is, and the reasoning of my own instincts. Hell, in the entire year Kyuranger was Running, I only discussed or made mentioned of it around a dozen times in any significant manner in that period after I dropped it.  Most of them?  When it was Relevant to discuss it or refute something that had been spread in the fandom which was a factual Lie or blown out of proportion.  I otherwise left it alone for people to enjoy or hate on as they wished and stayed out of it...until people kept berating me to give it a second chance. After MONTHS of this I finally caved and watched more of it.. and proceeded to predict every episode of the series simply from the ‘next time’ trailers.  One of the bigger things I called before it happened?  Revelations of Quervo’s betrayal and his related possession by Don Armage.  Why could I? Because it was a cliche. Raven’s and crows by Proxy of Tengu (quervo’s creature themes) in Japanese Literature/mythology are most commonly used as either Divine Messengers or traitors to their cause; the latter often from selfish, self-serving motivations or malevolent corruption. Quervo ended up not diverging from that latter interpretation. And I saw them as taking that route with it (as opposed to Just Redoing Utsusemimaru's story from kyoryuger with Tsurugi as...well, Kyuranger redid a lot of stories from previous sentai), because of the derisive and flippant manner the show treated Death as both a consequence and tragedy before making it reasonable that they would do so.  All that informed because of my experiences with Japanese storytelling tropes, mythology and the Eastern take on The Heroes Journey Monomyth. But I dropped it in the first place because it was clear it was not going to be something I would enjoy and I would be spending the whole year bashing it, but I didn’t want to do that.  I went and did the ‘don’t like, then don’t watch’ thing people often want from those in the detractor camp of series people like when they don’t want to hear a dissenting opinion, and instead went to watch “wander over yonder” and other series I did like which did many of the same things Kyuranger did in ways which were more appealing to me. As That Pointless hate and bile was not something I wanted to spread or have infest my life.  I did not want to rally a crusade of bloody vengeance against the show for every perceived slight. For That’s not the person I am or want to be. And with how horrible 2017 was for me personally (including my Stepfather withering away from an incurable disease before dying and relatedly being thrown out of my home), it was something I could do without. I decided I was done with it, and made my exit calmly and rationally as a Mature adult would when they decided they didn’t like something, and only brought it up when it was relevant to bring it up after that, until other people dragged me back. Would you honestly have preferred it if I spent week after week angry at something and pointing out every single way it was messing up?  ‘cause anyone can do that.  Many people still did.  it’s not like I was ever a deciding voice, just another sharing the same perspective.  I would’ve just done it with the framing device of explaining the context of why people disliked it, as opposed to bashing it on the principle of it existing. So why Should I be the guy that Goes onto every blog, every forum and lambasts any person that ever said something good about it with a bulletpointed list of reasons?  Hell, I avoid the Tokusatsu forums in their entirety because OF my experiences with that fandom Toxicity. And The reason I ended up predicting the content as I did when I finally gave in?  It was Because I am very well-versed in Science fiction and space series tropes Kyuuranger as a series called upon (star trek, star wars, babylon 5, farscape, gundam, Battlestar galactica...the list goes on as I prefer sci-fi stuff to fantasy series) alongside super sentai ones due to me having watched over half the franchise and the afore-mentioned mythology awareness, and thus could ask myself ‘From what I’ve seen before and this show has been doing thus-far, how could they go about doing this plot they’ve teased in the next episode?’  Watching the first Five episodes of the series was more than enough to provide that.  And Five these days is considered lenient now, many Reviewers have reached the point of doing it in One, depending on their familiarity with the general signs of poor execution in the genre, medium or premise of the related story. Once more, it wasn’t about being right, it was about thinking on and applying the experiences I have had to the subject matter, and speculating on where it’s going, only to find it was as I had Guessed.  My continued dislike of it being because those predictions included ‘what are the bad ways they could do this story’ as well, and finding more times I guessed that to end up being true. And I do this with...basically everything.  My roommates and family are astounded by how often I call plot twists in advance of the story’s seeding of it.  One of the reasons I don’t like M Night shyamalan movies (besides all the other reasons people cite) is his twists are ridiculously transparent to me. I literally had the response to the twist that Bruce Willis’ character in the Sixth sense is dead of “yeah, and?” because I didn’t think that was what they were building up to, I just thought that was the quirk of the movie’s story.  the same with the old lady being the Devil in “Devil”. Months ago My roommate showed me the movie “Cabin In The Woods”. I had never seen nor heard of the movie beforehand. AS I later learned, It is Notorious as a movie where people do not see the plot twist coming. In the first few minutes of watching? I guessed the plot twist. It is actually a very good one that I do not wish to spoil here and was pleasantly surprised at how they went about executing it, but I Figured it out because I’d seen a lot of the works of The movie’s Writer Joss Whedon. If someone were to propose I had a superpower?  That’s basically it, I predict narratives from precedent of their content, it’s genre, and their creators.  I am VERY good at doing this once I know where they’re going.  That is, after all, how I guessed the entire second half of Kamen Rider Ryuki’s story without having seen it beforehand from making a Phoenix Down Joke. My roommates and I love the Venture bros, Season 7 is currently Airing, it has been wrapping up a number of it’s previous hanging plot threads and story seeding. Of them I guessed from the watching of previous seasons: Vendata being the blue Morpho and the Monarch’s Dead “Father”. The Monarch and Rusty Venture being Half-siblings as Jonas Venture Senior had Sex with The Monarch’s Mom. And Rusty being a clone. There are others, but there’s spoilers involved.

I was excited about all of that, because the series had been building up the suspense about answers to those questions for years or seeded paralleling stories to them previously in the series (I.E Hank, Dean and Dermott’s relationship).  I was elated to learn I’d been following the deeper lore of the show as they’d intended from their intermittent seeding of the story, that I’d connected the clues as they’d wanted them to be connected.  And for all of that to add up?  That’s Good storytelling.

And it’s not like I’m always right about that stuff either or desire media to bend to how I predict it would go.  if I’m not experienced with a certain story engine, I’m less likely to be right and more willing to go with the flow to explore it, and conversely really open to things that defy my expectations.

I’m a huge fan of .Hack and the Megaman battle networks series, and other stories using Virtual settings for storytelling (though Not SAO, I’m in the camp that dislikes SAO), thus was very experienced with the tropes, storypoints and themes Kamen Rider Ex-aid was making use of.  I played this same ‘game’ with it...and It proved me wrong very often with how it was taking things.   I didn’t see where it was going, as the show was not Predictable nor following the expected formula’s.   Sometimes I disagreed with or was critical of what it was doing, such as the lacking focus on Hiiro Kagami’s relationship with his lost Love Saki and her impact on him.  For how important it was to the series and his Character it was very poorly grounded, established and explored even with the Later Snipe miniseries going back to her death to further flesh it out, as it was something that needed more than the show was able to give for it to fully justify where they took it and all the connected links in the story it chained together.  Or, say, Kiriya’s Death in how Toei tried to make money off of a character death by selling commemorative shirts to it, as that’s a scumbag thing to do and made it seem like they ordered his death just to sell merchandise.  it wasn’t true and was just a bad marketing decision, the reaction to it being so hostile as Toei had pulled crap like that before and had shown itself tonedeaf to that conduct.. But for the most part, I adored how original a lot of it was by it’s end, most of my early criticisms they took the proper steps to mediate, and at the end it used all of it’s assets very smartly.  I enjoy it not because it conformed to some pre-scripted narrative, but because it defied and exceeded my expectations of it, and tended to blow up my expectations in the best ways possible.  whatever nitpicking that’s applicable to it doesn’t negate the overall good it did and quality it put out week after week.

And even with those nitpicks and any other criticism I voice, it wasn’t about me being personally right and the show wrong about how it did it, but areas in which the product was flawed and the areas in which it could have been improved.  Pointing those out?  That’s what a reviewer does.

But To bring it back to Zi-O as this is ultimately what this is all about with people wanting me to shut up about it despite me already having done so for the most part...with the extensive experience concerning the Writer and Producers I have had in almost everything they’ve worked on, how Negative that experience has been, Time travel stories being something I really adore and read/watched/played a lot of, awareness of how easy it is to screw it up if you don’t care about addressing contradictions or think of how to do it without such, and the first episode and the ones I’ve been dragged into commenting on since by people sending me messages Just like this one, I’ve done this ‘how would they likely do this from everything that’s been presented’ exercise with them and ended up being mostly spot-on with the predictions Thus-far.  I’m not going out of my way to do it or bash every little thing, I’ve been trying to do what I did with Kyuranger and Leave it be unless there’s something relevant to say, or someone drags me back.

Again, the post I linked to up top?  That was another attempt to do that, showcase what is the standard expectation I have for a series using a time travel story device so you see where I’m coming from on this. And yet, half a dozen people instead shot me angry messages and death threats, some of them telling me ‘Beast Wars Transformers is Shit and makes no sense and zi-oh was already doing it better than that because it intentionally decided to not play by any rules, even the ones it made up.’ ...The fact it ‘explaining’ it’s ‘rules’ and calling people losers for bothering to care about story consistency is locked behind a subscription paywall instead of it being part of the main series seems to be lost in this. ...Is this the one people want to fall on their sword over?  Really?  Guy’s, it’s a show run by a man who’s known for crappy conduct and screwing people over.  There are better targets for this, and people who are more active in shaping public opinion than the one who’s moving towards retiring from doing web-video content altogether because of medical reasons!

You want me to leave Zi-O alone, just let others enjoy it blindly?  That’s what I’m doing.  Stop bringing it to my doorstep and dragging me back.  You’ll just see come occasional snark when I’m given the prompt, that’s it.  If there’s no supplied prompt you won’t even see that.

[marybeatriceofmodena]

Solo: a Star Wars Story - A Review (which I managed to keep short at least when it comes to my standards *puts gold sticker on self*)

So I saw Solo yesterday, and I’ll be putting my detailed/spoilery thoughts under the cut.

As for a general overview while trying to spoil as little as possible… I definitely liked the movie. To compare it to another anthology movie, I didn’t like it as much as Rogue One, but it was very enjoyable: basically Western meets film noir meets sci-fi, and the combo worked pretty well.

I have to admit, before the marketing for the film started, I was very meh about it. I didn’t hate it in advance like some people did, but I was pretty much planning to see it just because Lawrence Kasdan was the screenwriter, Donald Glover was Lando and I honestly couldn’t have thought of a better casting choice, and Thandie Newton aka my dreamcast for Selina Kyle/Catwoman was in it.

I did start getting a bit more optimistic as time went on. And since I’m a creature of dust and ashes and, most especially, salt, I wanted Alden Ehrenreich to succeed as Han partly because of the fandom being all “HE’S NOT HARRISON”, and also partly because if he hadn’t told the big bosses the original directors wanted Han to be space Ace Ventura, this movie would have been a mess.

And… despite all the complications, they actually did it. And unlike Justice League, I didn’t really see big contrasts indicating there had been two different visions working on the movie.

So it honestly makes me sad that the movie is underperforming because it's a genuinely well-made, multi-layered heist film. I don't think it's the film itself's fault: Lucasfilm/Disney had some pretty terrible timing and promo for the film overall, and they REALLY should have pushed it back to December.

Everyone in the cast was very good, well-cast: Alden did a terrific job playing Han and while I didn’t think he looked a lot like Harrison Ford at first, I can see the resemblance now; Donald Glover was perfection as Lando, and Emilia Clarke and Qi’ra turned out to be pleasant surprises and I enjoyed them a lot more than I expected to.

For some reason… the overall storyline and how it drew out kind of reminded me of a video game. I’m not sure why, though. That’s not to say it was badly done, but it could simply be that I became used to how quickly paced TFA and R1 were, or how TLJ was either jarringly edited at first viewing, and how certain elements were rushed and others dragging for too long. Solo didn’t have any pacing issues… though I might change my mind after repeat viewings.

There were a lot of things I was a bit afraid of before the film came out that thankfully did not bother me too much, but I did read spoilers before going in. I kept myself spoiler-free to a certain extent for TLJ and I kind of regret it, so I decided not to take any chances. (SO YOU CAN BE SURE AS HELL I’LL DO IT FOR IX.) So I was prepared going in, so there’s nothing I saw that upset me.

Shout-out to the soundtrack. It was GREAT.

Anyway, the spoilery part is under the cut. Read at your own risk.

Alden was really a pleasant surprise. You can really forget he’s not Harrison and even if Han is a lot more optimistic and cheerful than the cynical scoundrel we meet in ANH, he’s still the dumbass Han who brags a lot even if he’s a dumbass and who tries to talk his way out of shit and fails because he’s a dumbass. He's not the cynical scoundrel we meet in ANH *yet*, but it made sense for me for him not to be like that right now. He's basically a dumbass puppy dog like his son. No wonder Qi'ra is so protective of him.

Donald Glover as Lando was a scene-stealer. I even wish we saw more of him, or scenes of him with Han, because they had some pretty good frenemy chemistry. 

Han and Chewie were probably one of the best parts of the movie, and even my favorite relationship out of all. Their encounter was very well-done, and they totally sold how they’d do anything for each other.

Qi’ra… I could honestly write an entire post about her alone, and I probably will, because she was hands down the most intriguing character in the movie. And it’s nice to see Emilia Clarke show off her acting chops and see her in other stuff than Boobs, Dragons, Death. Though, I will say, my point of view on Qi’ra will probably be different from the point of view I’ve seen from other people, but yeah.

As a sidenote, I definitely saw the parallels between Ben and Rey, and Qi’ra and Han. As a lot of people pointed out, Han and Qi’ra in the elevator and then confronting Dryden Vos was basically “Throne Room, take two”. This said, I can definitely see how Qi’ra and Ben are similar, and how Han and Rey are similar, but I did spot some similarities between Qi’ra and Rey, and between Han and Ben. I’ll probably expand it in another post, once I get down to writing it, but one thing Qi’ra and Rey have in common is how they smile even in the most dismal situations and in order to hide their vulnerability – even if their reasons for smiling are very different. Qi’ra is a Stepford Smiler to survive, and because she knows how ugly the world can be, while Rey is not only a lot more sheltered than Qi’ra (even if her life was by no means easy), but she puts on a happy face because she’s in denial about her parents, and probably because she so desperately wants to be accepted and loved. So long story short, Qi’ra is basically how Rey would have been if she had gone through what Ben went through. So that really brings a whole new perspective to how Han views Rey in TFA: I think he sees his youthful optimism in her, but he’s also fully aware what could happen to her if she went back on Jakku, because of what happened to Qi’ra. But again, I’m preparing a full-blown analysis of Qi’ra. Stay tuned.

I legit cried when she told Han she thought of him and the two of them flying away whenever it was hard for her. I’m still getting kind of teary-eyed thinking about it. 

 Okay, last thing about Qi’ra: I wouldn’t say she becomes a crime boss because she craves power or because she’s scared and has some sort of Stockholm Syndrome or whatever. I’d actually argue she chose love over power, and she’s ultimately a tragic case of “to love is to let go”. So yeah, it’s a lot more complicated than it seems, and it’s all about her being pretty much Han’s dark guardian angel of sorts. But again, I’ll expand on it in another post.

Tobias Beckett was great. A total asshole, but you still get attached to him even if you want to kick him in the balls.

I really liked Val and Rio, and it’s a waste they died so early. You could totally buy Val and Beckett as the old-married couple who bicker all the time. They managed to make their deaths emotional—and special shout-out to Rio’s death. Nice bit of foreshadowing when he dies saying that dying alone is the worst thing (now please excuse me while I roll in a ball in a corner and cry, thinking of how Han died nearly 40 years later).

I know L3 annoyed a lot of people. She didn’t annoy me too much, mainly because I just decided to not take her seriously and to see her “droid rights activism” as a joke. I mean, just looking at how Lando takes it, every time she makes a comment about it or does something about it, he’s all “Oh God not this again”. As some people have pointed out before me, she’s basically a robot version of Lisa Simpson. Her dying didn’t move me as much as Val or Rio, though.

Also, the TLJ novelization mentions a virtual intelligence of sorts in the Falcon that has a pretty foul sense of humor, so that’s probably foreshadowing for the reveal that L3 has been integrated into the Falcon after her death.

I’m going to talk about Dryden Vos in my Qi’ra post, but I don’t know if it’s due to Paul Bettany’s makeup, but he looked kind of… frail? Don’t get me wrong, he’s totally the Affably Evil Sociopath type, and he’s definitely someone you do not want to mess around with, but yeah. Him looking almost skeletal was probably part of the deal.

Enfys Nest was EPIC. I really hope we get comic books or novels about her, and it’s nice to see other rebel cells around. And her theme was THE SHIT with the choir and all. (Also, for my fellow Les Mis fans reading this: her actress (Erin Kellyman) is going to be Éponine in the upcoming BBC adaptation of Les Mis.) 

Spotted Warwick Davis playing one of Enfys Nest’s crew.

Also, the confrontation between Han and his crew versus Enfys Nest was some space spaghetti western shit. And Lando leaving with the Falcon was absolutely hysterical.  

That’s all I can think of right now. I’ll maybe have more thoughts later on.

[artificialqueens]

Follow Your Arrow Pt.1 (Trixya) - Pichitinha

A/N: I am back with even less plot than the last two times! I bet you didn’t think that was possible, but it is. Anyway, Trixie’s an aspiring country singer and I am obsessed with Brandy Clark ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ It’s on AO3 as usual and you can find me here as @pichitinha. Enjoy!

Katya has spent the entire afternoon checking the clock behind her every five minutes, yearning for it to go faster, to reach 5pm soon so she can log-off her computer and get the hell out of the suffocating building.

It’s nearing 7:30pm when she manages to do so. She’s tired, all the muscles in her body hurt from sitting down on her horrible chair and her mind has practically given up at this point. She’s angry, she hates the place and the job and, okay, she doesn’t hate the people because she doesn’t really hate anyone but by god are they boring and no help at all in making the day any better. She’s also sad, she’d been looking forward to going over to Alaska’s so they could watch the new episode of their reality TV show together but she’s missed it because one stupid client had kept her for over two hours longer than she needed to stay.

She wants to quit so bad. She really wishes she could.

As soon as she hits the sidewalk and looks over to the bus stop where she’s supposed to go, she sees her bus there already, the last passenger climbing in. She makes a motion in its direction, considers running and yelling and raising her arms to call the driver’s attention, but she’s a bit far and knows the chances are small. Her body aches and she doesn’t have it in her. She settles for the fact that the next one will take at least thirty minutes and that she’ll be home in just a bit over that if she walks, so she starts walking in long strides.

She’s never walked home from here before, but she knows the city and she knows the way. She takes this opportunity to look around, to see what’s changed in the streets she’s known since she was a child but hasn’t visited in a while. She’s surprised by the amount of new stores and bars and clubs in what she remembers being a fairly residential neighborhood.

She comes to a stop in front of a bar. It looks like it’s themed, part sci-fi, part medieval, sort of steampunk style. She can faintly hear the sound of music coming from the inside and it sounds live. It’s a man and he has a nice voice and he’s singing some sort of acoustic version of a song from N'sync.

She can’t say she isn’t curious.

Usually Katya avoids bars, thinks it’s easier to not tempt herself even though she’s fairly grounded in her sobriety for a long time now and can easily be around alcohol with no issues, but she needs to go in and see what this place is about, thinks about having a cool new place to bring her friends one day so they’ll stop saying her outing choices are always weird and the same. Maybe then they’ll just be weird but new.

She enters and she immediately loves the crowd around the bar. It looks like a regular bar - as in, non-gay, which is a type of place she hasn’t visited in a while - but everyone seems weird which is something she appreciates and it makes her feel at home. There are people dressed in steampunk costumes, there’s a crowd on the biggest table that is all in cosplay and Katya thinks they’re celebrating something, and around the bar there are people dressed in all possible different styles.

Near the stage she sees the sign: Variety Amateur Cover Tuesday. The guy on the stage is finishing his cover of Bye Bye Bye as she sits down and soon a girl in punk clothes comes in and starts singing something that Katya thinks is from The Clash, but she might be wrong. She figures that that’s what variety means, that they have all different musical styles, and Katya looks around to see that everyone is there for that, that everyone is simply enjoying all the songs from different styles and she smiles.

She orders herself a ginger ale, decides to sit in for a few songs before heading back home to take the shower she so desperately wants and needs, and upon closer inspection she sees that there’s a list close to the bar with the names of the people that’ll be performing and what musical style they’ll be doing. She figures which one is the girl singing right now, and if she’s right the next one will be country.

That’s a drastic change. She hopes the girl - Trixie Mattel, says the paper - will be able to hold the crowd.

Soon enough the girl is leaving the stage to a round of applause and oozing country style comes in the person Katya assumes to be Trixie. She has her guitar on her hands, she’s wearing blue cowboy boots that don’t quite go but don’t quite clash with her yellow dress either, and her hair is definitely going for full Dolly Parton fantasy.

“Hi, I’m the gal that’s not here a long time, but I’m here for a good time, Trixie Mattel!” she says to introduce herself and fixes her guitar on her lap as she sits on the stool, and Katya can’t help but laugh at her remark. “Despite the hair and the style I will not be doing Dolly today. I hope you enjoy, though.”

Trixie adjusts her short pink nails on the guitar strings and starts a slow but catchy melody. When she starts singing, Katya is blown away by her voice. She doesn’t know the song, has no idea who the artist is, but she finds Trixie’s choice good because the lyrics are incredible. She sings with emotion and Katya finds herself wondering how much of the song applies to her own life.

“- it’s been a forty-hour week, and it’s only Tuesday -”

“Uhuh,” Katya hums in agreement to the words and raises her glass slightly, and she’s mildly surprised when she realizes that Trixie notices it and smiles a bit at her as she keeps on singing.

“- she lights a cigarette out on the balcony

When she gets a couple minutes to herself -”

She raises the tone at that, the words leaving her mouth in a beautiful strong tune, and Katya nods again, but this time Trixie’s looking down at her guitar, her fingers looking agile and natural on the strings as she keeps singing to the crowd, never once faltering.

When the song is nearing its end she stops playing the instrument and follows the rhythm using only her voice, and Katya knows that that’s a fairly common practice for singers, but as someone who sounds like a strangled eagle, she’s in awe.

“- So she’s a mom and a dad and a taxi driver

When the baby’s sick, she’s an up-all-nighter

A hand and a shoulder and a referee

A real life hero if you ask me

‘Cause those kids ain’t gonna raise themselves -”

She plays a couple of final notes on the last verse, lets the sound end together with her singing, and Katya finds herself clapping louder than anyone in the room when she bows. Trixie’s eyes turn to her and she smiles one more time, and then she’s leaving the stage, going on the opposite direction from Katya.

Katya bites her lower lip and looks down to her watch. As much as she wants to get home, it’s still early and she can spare a few minutes. She looks around, checks every corner to see if she can find Trixie, but the singer is nowhere to be found. Soon the stage is taken again, this time by a guy to whom Katya pays no attention at all as she orders another soda and keeps looking around, convincing herself she’s not waiting for Trixie to appear again even though she most definitely is.

The guy on stage finishes his R&B - in the back of her mind Katya thinks he sounded good and she claps, but she’s not really sure - and the next person on stage seems to work for the bar as he’s giving an announcement.

“Hi, everyone! I hope you’re enjoying the songs, we’ve been getting really good reviews on our Tuesday night variety shows. Please don’t forget to vote on your favorite artist of the day when you leave, we wanna know who to invite back for our other shows. Enjoy the rest of your night!”

Katya glances around the room one more time, and when she fails to see a high blonde Dolly Parton hair, she drinks the remainings of her beverage and moves to the exit. She sees the voting poll on the wall, and looks carefully for Trixie Mattel on the list.

Check.

*

Katya has never, ever in her entire life worked late unless she absolutely needed to, so when she insists to her coworker that she can stay and finish her report on the following Tuesday, everyone thinks she’s going crazy. She shrugs though, doesn’t want to explain because for one thing they’re not her friends, and also she feels a bit silly.

Katya’s never, ever willingly listened to a country song before either, but as Three Kids No Husband remains on the repeat, she guesses things can change - although this is not the version she wishes she was listening to, no matter how good the singer’s voice is or the fact that the song is in fact hers.

She leaves around the same time as last week, just a few minutes early just in case, and speeds up to the bar. She looks for the same spot on the counter, it has a good view of the stage, and glaces at the list of the day. She figures they’re at the person right before Trixie, and she sighs in relief at not having missed her, although she immediately scoffs at herself. What is she, a teenager?

She claps as the person on stage finishes her song and soon Trixie appears. Her hair is a lot different this time, it’s tied on a messy bun - the kind that for sure was made to look that way, as the front frames her face perfectly - and the rest of the outfit fits together better. She has on yellow cowboy boots this time and a cute white dress with yellow ribbons on them. Just the same as last time her lips are pink, and she brings them to the mic to greet everyone.

“Hi, I’m the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe, Trixie Mattel!” Katya doubles over laughing and it doesn’t seem to go unnoticed by Trixie. “I hope you guys enjoyed last week’s song because I’ve got another one from the same artist. Thanks for voting for me!”

She once again hits the strings with dexterity and Katya notices they’re not painted this week. She starts singing and her accent seems stronger in this song, which starts slow but soon builds up and, as this time Trixie’s standing up, she starts swaying to the sound. It’s incredibly cute and Katya’s hypnotized.

“- There’s no crime of passion worth a crime of fashion

The only thing savin’ your life

Is that I don’t look good in orange and I hate stripes -”

Trixie doesn’t sing only with her mouth, she performs the song as the words leave her and the face she makes in the chorus is so perfect you’d swear that said cheating guy from the song is right in front of her at the moment. Katya is once again wondering how much of the song applies to her life, doesn’t think anyone can sound so sincere without relating to the words to a certain level, and she really, really hopes that today she manages to at least say hi and ask her that.

When Trixie finishes singing she claps loudly again and Trixie still makes a point to let her know she saw it. She leaves the stage and Katya finally looks at the bar, realizes she hasn’t ordered anything and asks for a virgin cocktail, her mind to focused on where Trixie could be to fully care which one.

As the bartender hands her the glass, though, she feels a tap on her shoulder.

“Call me out on stereotyping but you do not look like a country enthusiast.”

She turns around fast, recognizes the voice, and in the fast motion manages to spill part of her drink on her own hand.

“Oh! Hi. Uh, yeah, I guess I’m not really a country fan. I like your renditions, though.”

Trixie smiles again, and maybe it’s because she’s close, but it looks so much more honest now. It’s at the same time smug and shy and Katya finds herself smiling back.

“I’m Trixie,” she says raising her hand.

I know, Katya thinks. “I’m Katya.”

“Well, Katya, can I join you for one drink? I gotta go soon, but my throat is really dry.”

“Of course.”

Trixie orders her drink and only once she has it in her hands that she turns back to Katya, who’s sipping on her straw and staring at her like an idiot.

“So, you like my shows?”

“From the bad jokes at the beginning to the last strum of you guitar.”

“Don’t pretend you don’t laugh, I see you from up there!” She’s laughing as she says it and it’s the first time Katya notices she has dimples. She loves them. “But anyway, I love when non-country folk like my country music. Well, not mine, but you know.”

“It’s quality music, though. You sound very sincere when you sing it, almost like you’ve lived it.”

Trixie smiles lightly at her, takes a second to sip her drink and Katya can see her thinking about what to say.

“Well. There’s definitely no husband, but there are no kids either. And I’ve definitely never found my boyfriend with another woman in our bed. But I do think I look bad in orange.”

“I doubt that,” Katya replies without thinking, then clears her throat quickly before continuing, doesn’t give time for Trixie to reply to that. “You have a boyfriend, though?”

Trixie laughs so hard that her head falls back and no sound escapes her mouth.

“Oh. Oh wow. No. I most definitely don’t.”

Katya knows that tone. She knows that laugh, knows that look, understands perfectly what her body language is saying. She recognizes every bit of her actions in herself, many many times before.

“Cheers to that,” she offers raising her glass, hopes Trixie will get it and that she’ll be as excited as Katya is right now.

She smiles and raises her glass, her blue eyes as clear as day. “Cheers.”

*

Katya has a total of six blouses, three skirts and two pairs of pants that she uses to go to work, combining them absentmindedly every morning, not really caring much whether they match. She sits behind a desk all day, shoulders down in boredom, and the only people that see her daily outfits are the bus driver, a few people on the streets, and the receptionist.

So, yeah, she feels a little self-conscious when it’s Tuesday morning and she’s wearing a dress. It’s not a fancy dress by any means, and it’s definitely not new, she wears it quite often to all types of events such as visiting her parents or having friends over to her place. She’s never worn it to work though, and she wonders if anyone will notice. She hopes they don’t, she hopes no one asks what’s the big event as she knows they normally do, because she can’t really find it in herself to say that she wants the country singer from the weird steampunk bar to notice it.

She does, though. She really hopes she notices it. And she feels a rock at the bottom of her stomach at that thought, that feeling. How long has it been since she’s felt interested in anyone beyond a mere sexual attraction? Real fucking long.

She plugs in her earbuds as she steps out of her house and for the first time since she got this job and started making this route to the bus stop she doesn’t hear the sounds of the city around her. She never listens to music on her way to work, always minds her surrounding and the life going on around her, always pays attention. Today she has a deep country singer blaring two songs on repeat on her ear, and she closes her eyes to see if she can hear Trixie’s voice over it.

The day itself drags, uneventful as usual, and Katya is ready to leave by 5pm even if she knows she’ll probably be waiting for over an hour at the bar just to see one performance. She waits for maybe half an hour but finally gives in, tries to walk calmly towards the bar and wonders where this infatuation came from when she’s never been one to develop feelings before being with someone. She’s much more of a one-night-stand-turned-into-relationship kind of person than a pining-for-ages-before-sex.

She likes adventures though, likes the unknown, the mysterious side of life. She’s excited about this, and she doesn’t let its uncertainty deter her.

She enters the bar and it’s a lot earlier then she usually arrives; it looks like it literally just opened. They’re setting up the stage and the ambience music is pleasant, and either way Katya takes a moment to once again appreciate the crowd, takes a deep breath as she sits down and decides to eat something while she waits, doesn’t want to hang around for so long just waiting for Trixie to appear.

She can’t stop herself from looking around, finishes her food and her drink and tries to move her eyes away from the door where she thinks she’ll come in unless there’s a back entrance for performers. It’s still early and she’s anxious, so she exits quickly for a cigarette because she’d need one anyway but also because she wants to calm down a bit.

She’s almost done with her cigarette when she hears the faint sound of a guitar. She curses and runs back in, can’t believe she sat there for so long just to almost miss her now.

She comes in in time to see Trixie start singing, she’s once again standing up and she has on a pink dress with a full skirt that dances around her legs as she plays and sings, and Katya doesn’t miss the way that her eyes keep moving to the spot where Katya was sitting the two weeks before.

She also doesn’t miss her smile as she sees Katya by the entrance, bites her lips as she considers whether or not she imagined that wink.

“- There ain’t no mall - no Waffle House

But there’s always something to talk about -”

Trixie doesn’t falter though, whether she winked or not, and she actually laughs a little at the lyrics as she sings them, as if they bring a story to mind. She imagines it briefly, a town with nothing going on, one school and one factory maybe, wonders if that’s the kind of place Trixie grew up in and how she presents herself so poised and outgoing on stage if that’s the case.

“- Yeah, it’s a big day

In a small town -”

As usual, Katya doesn’t even notice she’s clapping fiercely until everyone quiets down around her and she only stops her palms when Trixie looks at her before leaving the stage. She looks for the closest seat, doesn’t want to move and have that as an excuse for Trixie not finding her, and wonders if - hopes - Trixie will come find her.

She does and she has a big smile that makes Katya’s stomach give a somersault - but she also has two drinks in her hands, which makes Katya’s stomach drop.

“Hi, Katya.” She sits down as she slides one of the glasses to her and Katya takes one second away from her dread to consider that Trixie remembers her name.

“Hi!” she says as she takes a hold the beverage, but doesn’t near it to her face. “I missed your entrance joke.”

Trixie squints her eyes mockingly. “It was on purpose, wasn’t it? Don’t lie to me.”

“Of course not, how would I know if your jokes are improving if I miss them? Duh!”

Trixie laughs and sips on her beverage, and Katya knows she should do the same, but she keeps her hands steady on the glass, both resting on the table.

She might as well just say it, right?

“Uh, thanks for this.” She nods towards the glass. ” I don’t drink, though.”

“Oh.” Trixie raises her eyebrows.

“I just-”

“You don’t have to explain. If you don’t drink, you don’t drink. I’ll order you something else.” She moves her hands to take the glass back to herself but Katya holds it possessively, not really sure why.

“You don’t have to-”

Trixie just rolls her eyes. “Tell me what you like, I want to buy you a drink.”

Katya’s in the middle of protesting, but closes her mouth shut at that. I want to buy you a drink. She gulps and lets go of the glass, which Trixie takes to herself.

“A virgin version of whatever that is will be fine.”

Trixie nods and goes up to order it and Katya feels herself relax again.

Is this a date?

Trixie sits back down with a new glass now in front of Katya and she takes it thankfully.

“So, are you from one of those small towns you were singing about, Trixie?”

Trixie considers her, gives off a tiny smile before looking at her again.

“I don’t know, would you say that an hour drive to the nearest McDonald’s would qualify it as such?”

“Oh my god.”

“Oh, yeah. I mean, to be fair I’m from Milwaukee. But like, the middle of nowhere part of it.”

“Hah! Of course. How did I not notice it before.”

“I mean, I’ve lost my accent, so.”

She says it seriously and Katya isn’t sure whether she’s joking or if she really thinks she did, so she tries not to laugh. She fails though, finds it adorable the way she flushes a little and smiles back as she giggles.

“Humf, don’t talk to me about accents, miss Boston.”

Katya leans in. “If you must know, I’m Russian.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Da.”

Trixie squints her eyes. “Are you serious?”

Katya nods and sips on her drink, searches for Trixie’s face to see if her eyes are following her lips. She thinks they are, but she’s always been one for projecting. “I moved to Boston when I was three, though.”

Trixie rolls her eyes and slaps Katya’s arm playfully, and so what if she thinks she feels sparks where their skin touches? “That doesn’t count!”

It’s easy, natural talking with Trixie. Flirting, she considers - maybe. It’s been so long since she’s felt this immediate type of connection with someone, she’s not sure if she’s seeing to much into it.

She sips on her drink again, smiles around the straw at Trixie, and her heart’s as light as a feather when Trixie does the same.

Oh boy is she screwed.

*

Katya ends up leaving the bar much later than she intended for a Tuesday night and still when she gets home she realizes she didn’t ask Trixie for her number. She feels like an idiot for the rest of the week, walks past the bar a few times in hopes of running into her, but apparently she really only goes over on Tuesdays. She settles for the fact that she’ll only see Trixie the following week, isn’t exactly comfortable with how sad she is at the thought, thinks it’s completely crazy she’s already this deep into something - is is even something? - with someone she’s practically only spoken to twice.

It had been for hours though. So much laughter, so much in common. It’s rare that people will get her dry humor so effortlessly, that they’ll laugh so hard and give her all that attention. She wants to repeat that so bad, wants to sit at a bar for a few more hours and then maybe a restaurant and then a café and then anywhere really.

She might want to date Trixie. God, what is happening to her.

Next Tuesday she gets to the bar early again, but this time she refuses to get up from her seat. She won’t miss Trixie’s entrance again, wants to hear every word she has to say and wants to be very attentive to her eyes. She hopes they look at her.

She’s looking so forcefully to the stage she almost misses it. But there’s no way to not notice her pink jumpsuit and long wavy beautiful hair. She’s stunning and Katya’s is unsurprised.

“Hi! I put the pal in high school principal, Trixie Mattel. My first song of the night is going to be a sad one, so please forgive me.”

First song? Katya sits up straighter at the thought. There’ll be more.

She starts the first few chords and the tune itself already saddens Katya. She doesn’t know what Trixie will sing, but she knows she’ll get emotional.

Trixie’s voice is raw as it runs over the words, it’s pain and it’s earnest and Katya knows Trixie’s said she doesn’t always relate to what she sings but that just makes it more awestrucking, really, that maybe all of this emotion in her voice might not be real. How does one fake that? And how could Katya possibly know when she’s being real considering this?

“- Since you’ve gone to Heaven, I’ve struggled with goodbye

And broke a lot of promises I made the day you died

Wish I was more like you, less like myself

And I wish that I could talk to you 'cause I could use your help -”

Katya can’t particularly relate to the words at this moment, thankfully has her entire family living close by and finds happiness in their presence. She can imagine it though, what would be like if a tragedy like that were to strike. She wonders briefly if Trixie’s lived it. The thought saddens her.

When she finishes singing she comes down by the front of the stage, doesn’t bother with going backstage to drop her guitar or whatever it is she usually does in there. She makes a beeline for Katya and sits down by her side, her lips curved in a beautiful smile that makes Katya almost forget all of the sorrow that her words just cause her seconds ago.

“Hey! I’m glad you got here in time to see my first song.”

She’s glad Katya’s there. Maybe it’s not so bad that she’s infatuated.

“I’m glad I did, too. I didn’t know people could convey so much emotion through a song.”

Trixie blushes slightly, almost imperceptibly below her makeup, and Katya is delighted at the sight.

“Yeah, well. I went to drama school.”

“Oh? So you don’t really relate personally to the song?”

Trixie chuckles a little, and Katya knows that whatever joke she’s about to say, it’s gonna be sort of depreciative. “I don’t even have a dad!” And she laughs awkwardly, as if that’s ok as opposed to just not.

“Oh.”

“I had a step-dad growing up. But it wasn't… let’s just say that the chances of my brother being an alcoholic were higher with him than without.”

Katya remembers those lyrics in the song, something about a brother not being sober, and she gulps down the lump in her throat. Trixie doesn’t notice though, for the first time seems to be solely focused on herself, and she takes Katya’s silence as an indication that she should tell more.

She doesn’t have to, but Katya’s happy to listen.

She tells her things that Katya thinks she herself would never tell a stranger, maybe not even a friend, if she was in her place. Tells her childhood traumas and long lost dreams and the hardships that she went through before finding herself in a city she still can’t call home.

And she’s real, she’s so real. Katya can now see the difference between the stage honesty and this by a million miles. It’s astonishing really, it’s beautiful and heartbreaking the way she’s holding herself now, so vulnerable and sincere, and Katya keeps thinking back to how true she sounded as she sang earlier. Goosebumps raise on her arms.

Katya gathers the courage to touch her arm, decides to share a bit too because it seems only fair, but right then they announce Trixie’s name on stage and she remembers that she’d said she would perform again tonight.

“I… I’ll be right back, if you’ll stay?”

She looks uncertain as she asks, sort of in a hurry as they’re waiting for her upstage, and it baffles Katya that she even has to ask. She’s deviating from her regular way, putting on nicer clothes, listening to country music. She’s not leaving that bar before Trixie finishes performing.

“I’m not leaving this bar until you finish performing.”

She’s lost control of her mouth apparently, but as Trixie simply laughs before dashing off to the stage holding her guitar, Katya can’t help but giggle to herself.

“Ok, so this one will be a little more chipper than the previous one. I hope you enjoy it!”

Katya knows she will, is convinced that Trixie is somewhat a sorcerer for getting her hooked up on country music, and she can admit she’s pleasantly surprised at the topics of the songs Trixie’s been choosing.

She loses it when Trixie sings “rolls herself a fat one”, though. This might just be her favorite.

“- You know life will let you down

Love will leave you lonely

Sometimes to only way to get by

Is to get high -”

Katya can’t stop her smile as Trixie sings, almost laughs because yes, she agrees wholeheartedly, but also because Trixie definitely doesn’t look like the type that does.

Katya enjoys the song throughout, and she’s pleased to realise that so does the rest of the bar, as they clap and agree as she sings, send her off with a round of applause at the end. This time she goes to the back of the stage, probably off to put her guitar away and drink some water, but before she does she searches for Katya’s eyes, as if confirming she’s still there.

Katya feels her gaze at the bottom of her stomach. She readjusts on her seat.

Trixie is back within minutes, seems happy that Katya’s still there. She’s happy, too. “I should’ve known that the way into the audience’s heart was to talk about weed.”

Katya laughs but feels a bit ashamed because she also felt more enthusiastic today. Instead, she deflects, “Well, which one are you? The woman getting high on her kitchen table or her teenage self that’d frown upon it?”

Trixie shrugs. “I mean, I got high once.”

“Once?” Katya wants to hide her surprise, but she really can’t.

“Yeah. It was stupid, I was trying to impress this friend. It made me impossiblyhungry-”

“Yeah,” Katya agrees, but apparently Trixie’s not finished.

“I mean, horny.”

Katya almost falls off her chair. “What?”

Trixie doesn’t seem to notice how dry Katya’s mouth has gone, only nods as she moves the straw around on her drink. “Yeah, like, full-on horny. If I were ever to have a threesome, that’d be the day.”

Katya can’t do much but stare, does not want to picture Trixie being high and horny, but can’t really help it. She gulps and focuses on her drink, hopes Trixie can’t tell how bothered she is at the moment, hopes further that if she does, that she’s not uncomfortable with it, but when she finally manages to look back at Trixie, she can’t help her surprise when she sees her smirk.

Oh, okay.

“How about you?” Trixie asks when Katya still can’t find anything to say.

“Thanking god everyday for the mary jane.”

She laughs, but doesn’t break their gaze. “Maybe we could smoke together, someday?”

Katya’s breath catches on her throat, her hands freeze around her glass.

It made me impossibly horny.

Maybe we could smoke together.

She looks inside of herself for the Katya that usually doesn’t get flustered and that goes to bars and can easily get a girl. She really wants that Katya to help her now.

“Absolutely. I always have a joint at home.”

This time Trixie’s the one that stares, her eyes searching and considering. Finally she grins and sips on her drink.

“I guess I’ll have to come over.”

*

Trixie doesn’t come over that Tuesday, but Katya didn’t expect her too. And she’s not too bothered when they part ways, because Trixie tells her she’ll be performing there Saturday as she won the weekly polls and she invites Katya to watch her. And Katya manages to agree immediately and to offer her phone number just in case.

Trixie says she’ll text her so she can have her number too, but she doesn’t, and it’s not until Thursday that Katya realizes she’s an idiot who managed to give her old number.

She gets to the bar Saturday on the agreed time and looks for Trixie everywhere, wants to explain herself before she goes on stage, doesn’t want that stress roaming on her head stopping her from enjoying the show.

Then she sees a short pale blue dress and massive wavy blonde hair and she knows she’s found her. She tries not to stare at her figure as she strides over, wants to reach her before she disappears.

“Trixie! Hi!”

“Oh, hey.” She seems uncertain when she sees Katya. “I didn’t think you were coming.”

“Of course I came. I fucked up last time and ended up giving you the wrong number, that’s my old phone. I’m sorry.”

“Oh!” Trixie exclaims, readjusts the guitar strap on her shoulder. “That’s fine, do you want to-”

Whatever she was about to say, she’s interrupted. “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, Trixie Mattel!”

She looks over at Katya, bites her lip, but Katya just reassures her.

“Go on, I’ll sit down somewhere.”

She watches her go and then she looks around. It’s a full house - it is a Saturday - so there are no tables, but there’s an empty stool on the counter and she hops on it.

“Good night everyone. Thanks to all of you who voted for me on the weekly cover night. I’ve been singing songs by Brandy Clark and today I’m just gonna shift a bit and sing a song she wrote for another singer. I hope you enjoy.”

The crowd cheers and Trixie smiles and Katya can’t help but smile, too. It’s another cheerful song, still undeniably country, and Trixie’s voice once again takes the room in stride.

The lyrics are great, too, and Katya feels confident today when Trixie looks over at her when she sings the chorus.

“- Make lots of noise

Kiss lots of boys

Or kiss lots of girls

If that’s something you’re into

When the straight and narrow

Gets a little too straight

Roll up the joint, or don’t

Just follow your arrow

Wherever it points -”

She orders herself a water, drinks it without stopping to breathe and orders a second one.

It’s today.

When she least expects it Trixie’s saying her goodbyes and leaving to the back of the stage. Katya straightens her back, waits for her to appear. She’s there quicker than ever, looks for a stool and when she can’t find one just stands leaning on the counter really close to Katya.

“When the straight and narrow gets a little too straight?” Katya asks her, watches the small dimples appear on her face again as she laughs.

“I’m not really a fan of straight things.”

Katya laughs. “Me neither.”

Right then the person on the stool next to Katya gets up and Trixie sits down, ordering a drink.

Katya’s not backing down.

“So, kissing lots of girls?”

Trixie shrugs, Katya sees her trying to stop her smile. “I’m more interested in kissing this one particular girl as of recently, actually.”

Katya nods, swallows down the nervousness. “Yeah, me too.”

“Maybe we could roll up that joint, now?” Trixie offers, looks expectantly at Katya.

She takes a deep breath and smiles. “We definitely should.”

[tea4life707-blog]

“The Boy Who Broke Through His Ice”

Hi everyone! Okay so basically in English class recently, we had to write short stories based on themes in a book we read. I don’t actually write stories or anything, but since I’m BnHA trash now I thought, why not write a very bleak fan fiction about Todoroki angst??  So I wrote this short story and it’s only around 1,400 words, so please feel free to read if you would like~^^ Synopsis: Boy shut away and trapped in his life with his father finds a new freedom in another person and discovers himself along with his desire to escape his reality. It’s actually a tododeku fanfic AU set at the beach but shhhh my teacher doesn’t know that

I used a bit of imagery with ice and fire in it because it’s apart of expressing Todoroki breaking out of his shell, and also how Midoriya’s warmth encourages him to do so. I didn’t name the characters as well because I wanted to keep it as a sort of universal story, but it’s actually mostly because I needed to stay under the radar from my teacher haha. Can’t let myself be exposed lmao ~Be warned it’s a bit angsty but not too bad~

Enjoy :)

The boy sat in the dark corner of his room, his head in his hands. His father was on a rage again. Can he just stop? The boy thought. Ever since his mother died, his father would surround himself in alcohol, getting into drunken fights at bars, finding their family in debt, and a large variety of things that any normal person would be ashamed of. But his father wasn’t normal. He was depressed and in a slump, and the boy could see that, but he could not do anything other than accept that this was his reality. The boy stirred in his balled up position. He opened his eyes. Had he been asleep? He thought. Deciding on that explanation for his drowsiness, he moved from his position and shuffled his feet towards the bathroom. He found that his day had a lack of productivity, but he was used to it he guessed. These days he would simply go to school in the morning, come home in the evening, and if his father was awake, subject himself as a tool, a tool his father relieves his frustrations upon and uses to do his work and responsibilities, such as organising money, cooking, cleaning…..all of these things……yet the boy never said a word. After all, all he could do was accept that this was his reality. The reflection that presented itself when the boy viewed the mirror, was one of exhaustion and hopeless desperation to escape his reality, yet the boy only ever knew his current life. He raised his left hand and lightly stroked over the area surrounding his left eye, the image of boiling water and excruciating pain felt after it made contact with his skin, still apparent and locked in his memory.  The boy did not know his mother well now that he thought about it. She died when he was at a young age, but he remembered her soft light hair and tired grey eyes. Even though she appeared cold, she was very warm he remembered, and the boy missed her, he missed her so much. Closing his eyes, the boy could feel the warm, wet tears running down his face. I don’t understand this he thought, as he grasped at his shirt to bear the painful memories that resurfaced his mind. Yet, the boy did not understand his sadness.  After several passing minutes, there was an apparent silence in the house. The boy walked out of the bathroom, quietly as though he was an animal stalking its prey, and entered the living room, the area in which his father occupied. Looking around, the boy found his father’s dormant body laying on the sofa. He had a strong scent of alcohol tainting the room, and his loud snores soon contrasted the short silence. This is my chance the boy soon realised. Careful not to make a sound on his way out, he swiftly passed through the front door, closed it, and left the house.  The bright sun was very characteristic to the warm Sunday afternoon, and its sunlight vibrantly reflected off the boy’s red hair as he made his way down to the shoreline. The weak strength of the small tumbling waves brushed against his ankles as he place his feet into the sand. He closed his eyes and let his thoughts and feelings melt into his mind as he raised his head up to the sky. Ice……..all he could feel was ice, he realised. He felt trapped as though he was frozen, unable to move, unable to scream, unable to escape. All this as the cold slowly crept up and froze his heart, becoming a victim to an inability to feel the emotions of others and forever be trapped in his father’s image. All his life he had accepted this feeling, never feeling the desire to leave it behind. At least that is what he thought, since all he could do was accept that this was his re-  “Why are you crying?” His thoughts suddenly stopped as he shot open his eyes. It was as though his emotions were shattered into pieces and blown away by the wind’s breeze. A shock so great that it appeared out of nowhere. He turned his head and looked to his right. There was a boy. “I…” He was speechless, he didn’t know what to say. The boy next to him shuffled closer and looked up at him with curiosity. That boy was like a fire he thought, so bright and warm with his volumed curly hair and face dusted with freckles…..he was almost the embodiment of sunshine.  “I think I’ve seen you at school before. You seem to spend a lot of time by yourself, don’t you?” It was true, the boy thought. Throughout his life he had never been allowed to have friends and would always isolate himself, not because he wanted to, but because the time he spent with his father simply led him to a lack of understanding on how to react to others. “Are you okay? You’re standing here all alone”. The boy talked to him again. How strange, he thought. “I…..don’t know.” he replied with. He wasn’t sure if it was concern, but there was something about the other boy’s expression that made him feel a bit…..touched? The idea made his heart flutter. “Well….how about we go for a walk? There’s this cool rock pool up ahead! Only if you want to though….” The other boy seemed a bit timid, clenching the hem of shirt. The one standing in the ocean only nodded in response. At this the unfamiliar face smiled up at him. This new person was making him feel weird. He didn’t know why but he wanted to follow that dark curly hair, follow him anywhere…...he thought. The freckled boy suddenly stopped and turned to him. “Here, you still have tears on your face”. The boy reached up his hands to his face and lightly brushed his skin wiping his tears away. By this one action, this point of contact, a flaming fire broke through the boy’s ice. For the first time since his mother, he has felt warmth. 

The boys spent the rest of the afternoon walking along the beach. They became friends, the boy’s first friend......and they promised to meet again.  Throughout the next few weekends, the boy would sneak out of the house and meet his friend at the beach. His friend seemed to be quite talkative, fluently connecting words together, but the boy didn’t mind. If he could, he would walk with that freckled boy and listen to him talk forever. Whenever they were together, this fluttering feeling he had, there was no other word to describe it as anything other than happiness. One day after returning from the beach, the boy opened his bedroom door to find his father standing by the window. “Where have you been?” He asked. His eyes were dark and unstable. The boy remained quiet, he had no desire to share his secret meetings with his father. “Where have you been?” The father repeated, anger boiling and fuming in his voice. The boy looked away from his father. “No where.” he stated. “No…” the father started, “You’ve been going somewhere…I know because I sometimes wake up and you’re not there.” There was some sincerity in his voice, but all that disappeared with the appearance of his enraged expression. The father walked up to his son and grabbed his shirt. “You’re trying to leave me, aren’t you?! You’re trying to escape from me!” He was yelling, obviously drunk, but the boy was startled by him. “I don’t understand���..just look at that scar on your face. No one cares about you, so why??” The boy simply stood there. For some reason, he felt this fire being lit inside him. A strong burning desire to tell his father that he’s wrong……and the boy gave into it. “You’re wrong father…” the boy said. “Someone does care about me, but you wouldn’t understand.” The boy took his father’s arm and pushed it away, finally giving in to his longing to leave his father behind. “Good-bye….” he stated, bright flames dancing around his determination, melting away all the ice that had trapped him…..and finally drowning out his father with the pools of water left behind. He closed the door behind him and walked away from the unjust cage that was his old life. A new life starts now, he thought.  He found his friend at the beach and ran towards him, just to see those green eyes he loved so much. When he caught up he gently grabbed his friend’s hand, “Let’s go now” he said, as he felt his burning confidence, and they both left the beach together. .....The boy did not know where he was going, but he’d happily go anywhere, go beyond……as long as he was with that freckled boy….. The boy who broke through his ice. 

Ahhhh if you made it this far then thank you so much for reading!! 💕✨ I’m not gonna lie, I wrote this in about two hours on paper (procrastination is a real talent) and I did have to tweak it a little when typing it up.....but really I hope you liked it!! Please feel free to let me know what you think~^^ I’d appreciate feedback! Oh and please keep in mind this is an AU, so I only chose to depict Todoroki’s father this way for the emotional impact of the story. So please know this is not how I view Endeavor in the cannon story!  I still hate his guts in the cannon though, I’m a Todoroki stan so y’all can’t stop me lmao So anyway thanks again! :) Have a great day/night <3 *slithers back into the darkness of Tumblr for the next few months never to post again*

[shenlongshao]

Translated 4Gamer Interview about GG Strive

Here is the source of the translated interview with Daisuke Ishiwatari, creator of Guilty Gear. 

https://jiyunajp.wordpress.com/2019/12/01/guilty-gear-strive-daisuke-ishwatari-interview-while-protecting-the-spirit-of-guilty-gear-we-aim-to-broaden-the-field-of-players-who-can-enjoy-the-game/ This interview took place on sight at [ARCREVO America 2019] which was held on November 16th and 17th in California. We spoke directly on sight with the game’s General Director, Daisuke Ishiwatari, so we will present the interview in that form.GUILTY GEAR Strive’s General Director, Daisuke Ishiwatari 4Gamer: The title for the new game was announced – GUILTY GEAR STRIVE. Please share with us the thoughts and meaning behind the name. Ishiwatari: Continuing the theme of the entire GUILTY GEAR series, we decided on STRIVE. Furthermore, the IV in STRIVE is in bold so it also holds the meaning of “4”, but I think it’s fine if this is ignored. Up until now, X, XX, and Xrd all contained the letter X, so we decided to go with STRIVE to separate this title from those games. 4Gamer: What is the theme of the GUILTY GEAR series? Ishiwatari: This becomes a discussion about the story, but the theme revolves around seeking the answer to the question, “What does it mean to be human?”. For the new title as well, we want to continue with this theme and create a new drama to unfold. 4Gamer: I was able to play the demo version; I felt the game was much easier to play than the older titles. Please share with us why you decided to make such a big change to the feel of the game? Ishiwatari: For this title, we felt like we needed to appeal to both people that have never played a Fighting Game and to those who enjoy the modern style of Fighting Games; therefore we emphasized accessibility during development. 4Gamer: Ishiwatari, you’ve always had the image of someone who loves traditional Fighting Games and really puts his own into personality into whatever he makes. I’ll say it directly, but I felt the fact that you are making the new title easy to play is a bit uncharacteristic for you. Ishiwatari: The GUILTY GEAR series up until now has certainly been heavily influenced by my own personal image of what a Fighting Game should be, but because of this, the games were difficult to approach for new players. For this title, we wanted to reset that part and aim to make a game that can be enjoyed by many different players.However, this by no way means that I’m looking to make any compromises regarding the development of the game. I think we need to push that level of detail and depth that only ArcSystem Works and no other developer can achieve, and I believe that the entire staff understands this.This new title is the newest title in the long standing GUILTY GEAR series, so I absolutely believe we must protect the spirit of GUILTY GEAR. I’m currently in a position where the staff keeps proposing a multitude of new ideas, but I have to turn them away like a seawall. (laughs).  4Gamer: Please share with us what led to you developing the new game. Ishiwatari: I’ll be repeating what I said earlier, but while we were brainstorming and trying to figure out what a new player wanted in a Fighting Game, we came to the conclusion that we should reset the experience everyone has had up until now. I’ve always believed that a Fighting Game should feature a wide variety of characters, so we decided to use the base of GUILTY GEAR Xrd and increase the amount of characters. (Jiyuna Note – This is the only quote I am uncertain of, but I believe he is explaining why he chose to use Guilty Gear’s already robust roster rather than create a new IP?) 4Gamer: Regarding the idea that a Fighting Game should feature a large cast, do you plan on adding classic characters to Strive that were not featured in GUILTY GEAR Xrd Rev 2? Ishiwatari: I said the same thing during Rev 2, but if we can sell enough we will put every character in the game (laughs). Furthermore, GUILTY GEAR Strive is a separate title from Rev 2, so I still have not thought about whether or not Rev 2 is finished. There is still a possibility that more classic characters may be added to Rev 2 in the future. 4Gamer: Currently, Sol, Ky, May, Axl, Chipp, Potemkin, Faust and one unnamed character have been revealed. Can you share with us why you selected these 7 classic characters? Ishiwatari: This is something the entire staff struggled with, but we looked for “Characters that are recognized around the world”, “Characters that GUILTY GEAR fans want in the game”, and “Characters that feel good to new players”, and this is the lineup that we felt best matched those criteria. 4Gamer: All of the visuals have changed, but among those May changed so much that you could almost call her a different person. I feel like this was a good move and you’ve succeeded in gaining a lot of new fans. Ishiwatari: I’m very happy it worked out and also the views on her reveal video continue to skyrocket (laughs). 4Gamer: She’s very popular because no matter which frame you look at, she’s always cute. Ishiwatari: This is because our Art Director thoroughly designed the character piece by piece. 4Gamer: Besides May, Faust also received a big change from his past design. Ishiwatari: May and Faust both received big and noticeable changes, but we are carefully designing each character with new players and the global market in mind, while thinking about how much of that character’s charm we can show off. 4Gamer: Next please allow us to ask about the gameplay. Compared to the Xrd Series, I felt that the damage dealt by players was rather high. Do you plan to maintain this level of damage? Ishiwatari: Certainly the amount of damage dealt has increased, but looking at our data from the playtests, the length of each match has not changed that much from the older titles. This shows that the Neutral game and the Mind games have expanded. 4Gamer: Certainly I did not get the impression that the matches were short from the games I played. Ishiwatari: The titles up until now focused on performing long and difficult combos in order to deal big damage, but in order to perform these techniques a great deal of time spent practicing was necessary. We wanted to revise this part of the game, and make it easier for players to have the chance to win against higher level players. Of course, we are making sure that the game rewards players who put in the time practicing, so please be at ease. 4Gamer: In past titles, your success was linked to your ability to perform high difficulty combos and setplay. By simplifying this part, I see you are placing more emphasis on the mind games. Ishiwatari: Up until now I’ve aimed to create Fighting Games that play like Shougi. Shougi is a game where if there is a gap in you and your opponent’s skill level, then you will almost never lose. However, in order to match the current trends, it was necessary to change that part. I don’t know if this is a proper example, but I think I am aiming to create something close to Mahjong. Gameplay where confident movements, reads, and luck can allow one to seize a chance at victory. 4Gamer: The effect of Roman Cancel has also been narrowed down and its use has become easier to understand. Ishiwatari: In the Xrd series, it was a system that had too high a degree of freedom, so this time we set the scope of its use. However, just narrowing down its use is not interesting, so we’ve made sure to include a variety of different techniques. Basically, hitting your opponent and performing a Red Roman Cancel is simple and strong, but we want high level players to be able to explore and find other uses for the system. 4Gamer: I also felt that it was easy to use Red Roman Cancel to extend my combos. Ishiwatari: When you first start playing the game I think it will feel that way. But as you dive further into the game, there are also more difficult and interesting uses to discover so please look forward to that. 4Gamer: When talking about the GUILTY GEAR series, one of the words synonymous with the game is Okizeme –  the system of attacking your opponent as they get up; but in this version there are a lot of attacks that knock the opponent away and I felt like it has become difficult to perform Okizeme. Ishiwatari: That’s correct. We decided that not focusing on midscreen Okizeme and instead expand on attacking in the corner would make for a better game. Up until now, there are many examples of players losing to powerful okizeme from Advanced players without being able to do anything in return. Removing this scenario and instead increasing the number of mind games per match was one of our concepts when designing the game. 4Gamer: In this title, when you perform a combo in the corner, your opponent is blown away and the stage changes. Is it safe to say this is also a system to prevent matches from becoming one-sided? Ishiwatari: That’s correct. However, the person who performs the wall break receives a buff, so they are able to proceed at an advantage after the match resumes. Presently, the buff is a bonus to their Tension Gauge building, but this is only temporary and at this moment I am not sure what the buff will be in the final version. 4Gamer: In the current version, “Air Teching” which allows one to recover in the air is also gone. Please share your reasoning behind this. Ishiwatari: Even in the past titles, there were many requests to add in the “Hold Button to Air Tech” feature, and I’ve discussed it countless times with the production staff throughout the years. Of course this discussion came up during the development of the current version, but I thought the whole reason this is even a discussion is because of the complex air battles that happen in the game which in turn add to the difficulty. That being the case, I thought maybe we are supposed to make a game without the need for Air Teching, which led us to our current system. 4Gamer: That’s a pretty big system change. Ishiwatari: If you look back on the history of GUILTY GEAR, even though we attempted to create a new game with each title, we were held back and unable to proceed forward in many aspects due to the need to protect the conventional spirit of GUILTY GEAR. For this title, we are taking a development strategy to actively break free from those parts. This is a digression, but there actually is Air Teching in the game. This was put in to prevent infinite combos, so I don’t think you will see it in everyday play. 4Gamer: The Gatling System that offered a high level of freedom up until now has also been rather restricted. Ishiwatari: When we made the original GUILTY GEAR, I thought it would be easy if you could just hit buttons in order to make attacks come out. In actuality, it is pretty easy I feel. However, when you look at it from a competitive standpoint, if you have a vast number of routes available then a new player will have no idea which route is the correct one to use. Because of this, Advanced Players will have an understanding through experience and reason that will create a gap between the players. Because of this, I thought it would be beneficial to restrict the available routes. This way the system would be easier to understand for a greater number of people 4Gamer: I think the GUILTY GEAR series is not just about the battle system, but the story and characters are also a key part of its appeal. Are you planning on adding the Story Mode that was so highly praised in the past versions? Ishiwatari: I cannot say anything at the present time, but I would like to keep creating until the tale of Sol Badguy is completed. Also, I want to make it so that those new players who are now familiar with the previous story can keep up when playing GUILTY GEAR STRIVE. 4Gamer: Is the character with dreadlocks who appeared in the Trailer a main character in the story? Ishiwatari: I can’t say at this time, but we are planning on it. 4Gamer: Ever since his face was revealed in the trailer there hasn’t been any new information, when can we expect a followup on the character? Ishiwatari: We plan on sharing things as soon as they are completed, so please wait a little longer. 4Gamer: In Japan, there is currently an Esports boom surrounding Fighting Games. Do you have plans to develop the new title with Esports in mind? Ishiwatari: Of course we would like to get involved. However, I don’t know if our vision of Esports matches that of what certain Companies and Organizations think Esports is. 4Gamer: Since long ago, you have said Fighting Games are communication tool that connects the world. Ishiwatari: Yes. Of course there is the competitive aspect, but I think it is something that everyone can get excited over together, regardless of language or nationality. Recently there has been a Rugby Boom in Japan; the “No Side” that is called at the end of the match, this is something that we could do with Fighting Games as well. (Jiyuna Note – “No Side” is an outdated Rugby term that still exists in Japan. It signals the end of the match, and means that the competition is over, all the players should forget their differences i.e there are no more sides). 4Gamer: What do you think of the Esports boom? Ishiwatari: I think there are already too many different expectations depending on the business. However, I still feel doubts about whether or not the fun and excitement of Esports is properly being presented to the general audience. There are Esports shows being broadcast on late night television, but whenever I watch these I get the feeling that these are just programs that serve to promote the game. Simply using a game to host a tournament is certainly Esports, but I’m thinking about what needs to be done so the general audience is able to enjoy this. Just broadcasting tournament footage is not enough to spark interest. During the Rugby World Cup, they showed small rule explanations on the screen during the matches – I thought this was great. Regarding Esports, Sega has put out it’s Game Tournament Reporting System, bi-E-Play; I feel like this would be an interesting thing to test out. 4Gamer: Thank you for your time today. In closing, please send a message to all the fans looking forward to the release of GUILTY GEAR STRIVE. Ishiwatari: The first playtest for this game took place in America, but we have plans to hold playtests within Japan as well. I believe that direct feedback from players that play the game is absolutely essential to creating a good product, so I would be grateful if you came out to play and share your thoughts and feelings on the new game.