#i’m debating whether i should add more tags so this discussion gets more reach

[snaillock]

noo, bc i fucking feel yall. bc a fic i read thr other day?!? "gn!reader" the next line is "reader could arguable be considered afab" and then out of no where the fic uses female anatomy terms??? the reader is not "arguably" afab. it is afab, and a warning tag like "afab!reader, but no pronouns used" would have been a better explanation for your fic.

i fucking DESPISE when people do that and refuse to put the actual gender of the reader in the actual post or the tags. its really not that hard. as someone who writes both female and male readers, i know how to tell my viewers which one they are so they csn steer clear of something they dont like. its just female readers r considered "the standard" or "the default" with both female and male characters. (finding fem char x male reader is the hardest thing on earth omg but anyways)

and untagged drabbles are the WORST at this. there's no gendered tag and no warning at the top of the post so i assume the reader is gender neutral only to ve bombarded with fem terms. even if a creator doesnt want to put the reader's gender in the fic warnings, but it in the tags. it really isnt that hardddd. all tumblr writers need to have a seminar about tagging fics correctly and stating what is actually in your fic. or we all need to learn a03 etiquette or smth. bc being a male reader sucks😭

(srry sbout this rant. i just needed to say it)

nsfw mentions for anyone else reading!

dude yesterday i saw a fic that was legit tagged “gn reader, reader is called mama.” like how is that a coherent statement. it’s almost comical to me. one of infinite examples of what it’s like to look for fics on tumblr. like im BEGGING and PLEADING to people to think about what the neutral part of gn means.

i hate also when writers do “gn!reader that could be seen as female” when 90% of the fic makes it so so obvious like shut up that’s totally fem reader.

when people use afab as some cool fancy ass synonym for woman also irks the shit out of me but that’s a whole other conversation.

i fucking wish putting “character x female reader” or whatever gender in the actual tags itself was a much more common practice so filtering would actually do something. unfortunately the only people who actually do it consistently are of course the ones who write male reader fics.

like people shouldn’t be allowed to leave their fics untagged if it isn’t 100% gender neutral. like give me some indication god please. it’s even worse when i’m going through the blue lock tag so most of it is just untagged fem smut drabbles so it’s like a double smack in the face for me. like give me a heads up at the very least.

honestly i should just start fining people whenever they screw up with their tags. like straight up start demanding money for emotional damage charges.

(speaking of fem char x male reader, once i transition into more multifandom, i’m for sure gonna start doing those as well. the lack of them just makes me so so sad)

also don’t worry about ranting bc im so glad i have yet another chance to complain about this for the second time today. being mad about this stuff is like the whole reason why i even made this blog

[dathen]

It feels a little weird to start off Ace Awareness Week in the most ace-positive fandom I’ve been in by addressing something negative, but I wanted to address some common mistakes that people--especially allo authors--can make when portraying ace characters, even when they don’t intend to be acephobic.  

Most of the discussion of whether allo people can write ace characters all comes down to the same debate over and over: are you allowed to write ace people having sex or not?  With responses ranging from “No, never!” to “Yes, always!” with rarely any nuance.  But the fact is that there are just as many ways to insensitively write an asexual character in the most G-rated fics, and I never see any discussion on that.  So I’m starting one myself!

(warning for mention of acephobia and negative stereotypes about asexuality)

“Prude” and “Puritanical” 

These are extremely, extremely loaded terms, especially when applied to an asexual person.  I feel like a lot of asexual people know this by default, but when allo writers delve in they don’t have the history of weathering all the discourse framing asexuality as an inherently sex-negative identity, and how hard we had to fight for people to realize that being disinterested in sexual things for ourselves doesn’t equal judging other peoples’ sex lives.  Those words also imply some level of “this is a bad thing about this person they need to grow out of,” which takes on very ugly corrective connotations when applied to ace people.

On that note, “fluster the uptight prude, it’s fun!” is a very popular trope that I’m seeing used against ace characters more and more.  And in so many of these cases, you just have a scene of flat-out sexual harassment.  Or a scene of someone pushing past their friend’s boundaries.  Or people forcing someone to be uncomfortable because of their sexuality.  I can’t say it’s objectively worse when done to an ace character than to an allo one, but I can promise you that I’ve dealt with these exact situations dozens of times IRL and it’s miserable and each time I find it in an untagged fic played as cute and fun and hilarious it makes me feel ill.  If you’re aiming to write a fun friendship scene, maybe reach for something other than “a group of friends sexually harass the ace character because they enjoy seeing them get uncomfortable.”  And if you want to include a scene like that for other reasons, add a warning tag!

Sex-Averse =/= Sex-Negative

It’s an age-old acephobic viewpoint to treat sex-disinterested aces as if our not wanting to have sex is automatically judgment on everyone who does.  Back in the pre-discourse days, there was an amazing article about the pressure a lot of ace people feel to push themselves past their comfort levels to play up their interest in sexual things or willingness to expose themselves to it: even something like feeling obligated to listen to a friend going into detail over a hookup, out of fear of being seen as prudish or judgmental.  But having boundaries for ourselves is not an attack on anyone else, and people who have sex can just as easily be sex-negative.

“Oh but this character is a prude/sex-negative, but they just happen to also be asexual”  Why?  Why???? 

“Virgin” as an insult

Avoid using “virgin” as an insult, or as a synonym with being immature, naive, undesirable, an “incel,” etc.  I really shouldn’t need to elaborate.  This is such an accepted meme-ish fandom thing that people don’t realize how much it reinforces the idea that if you’re desirable at all of course you’ve had sex, or that asexual people have to have sex at least once to prove they don’t like it.  “Virgin” is an outdated concept in the first place!  Get rid of it!!

Additionally, “they just need to get laid” takes on nightmarishly corrective tones when applied to asexual people and, yes, is something we have to deal with constantly IRL.  

Tagging acephobic content

If you’re having characters within a fic hold these attitudes or talk like this...tag it.  I think there’s value in fiction that addresses stigma that ace people face, and acknowledging that people do treat us like this.  But it’s not something we should have to stumble into unprepared, so please give us the tools we can use to protect ourselves.  

“Sexually repressed”

This is another loaded term when applied to ace people.   Again, if you haven’t struggled through years of self-doubt because everyone around you is telling you your disinterest in sex is just repression, you just need to force yourself past it, you may not realize how terrible it can be to see an ace person painted as just being sexually repressed.  To this day, I still see posts of “there’s no such thing as asexuality, it’s just sexual repression.:  (Emotional repression is a whole different thing, we can absolutely be emotionally repressed)

You’re not a bad person or an Enemy (tm) if you’ve fumbled one of these, it’s just so deeply ingrained into society that it takes a lot of effort and dedication to unlearn--and I hope that this helps to equip people to start that process!

[bangtans-peaceful-piegon]

My Cup of Tea: Prologue

My Cup Of Tea: Prologue | YoongixReader

Warnings for this Chapter: none, just a post-breakup suffering OC who is saved by a whole Min Yoongi

“Coffee is bitter, so people add a little bit of sugar or creamer until it suits their taste. However, once it’s added it can’t be separated. It’s also addictive, it’s your choice to keep it as your poison or to control how much you take. Some people need it, some people don’t...In that case, it really isn’t their cup of tea.”

A/N: im finally deciding to post this after who knows how long sajkdfhd,, tysm for beta reading this for me @jtrbluv !!! again u were a huge help because the tag game you tagged me in gave me the final push to actually post this fic thats been collecting dust in my drafts. ily boo !!! <3 it also took a while because i wanted to do more research for this fic. i dont think ive read about or drank so much tea in my life for the past few months. pls enjoy the prologue everyone!

Word Count: 1,600+

You sat in the worn out leather booth, eyes trained on the steaming mug in front of you.

What just happened?

Something that took five years to grow ended in mere seconds.

Five years of dedication.

Five years of convincing yourself it would work out, that it could be fixed.

Five years spent on a relationship that should’ve ended before it began.

You mindlessly took a sip of your coffee hissing as the hot brew burnt your tongue, mind drifting back to the argument that occurred hours ago...

“You’re never here!”

“Was I not enough for you?”

“Where’s the old Y/N that I knew and loved?”

You weren’t sure about what was said after that except for... “I’m seeing someone else.”

The bruising pain on your tongue began to throb and you couldn’t help the tears that formed.

You never liked coffee, but the café was your favorite place. 

Perhaps it was the enticing aroma that attracted you every time you walked in, or maybe it was the cleverly thought out name that was in the form of childlike puns: Bearly Awake Brew.

Either way, you couldn’t despise coffee any more than you already did in this moment.

“Are you alright?”

You whipped your head up to see a man standing above you.

Through your bleary eyes you could make out a set of kind brown ones shielded by black frames which rested atop a boopable nose. On his head, a black mop of neatly trimmed hair along with soft cheeks paired with a soft jawline.

The man was dressed in a black turtle-neck and long-coat as if returning from a meeting discussing the newest stocks and bonds of business.

After a small, possibly noticeable, ogling of the stranger, you shook your head ‘no.’

He motioned to the seat across from you raising his brows inquisitively, “May I?” 

This time you slowly nodded.

He seemed harmless enough, and even if he tried anything there was pepper spray in your purse.

You sniffled as he took a seat.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No y-you wouldn’t understand.” He leaned forward onto his elbows—a determined furrow in his brow.        

“Try me.”

Who was this guy? He didn’t come off as threatening but somewhat… familiar.

You couldn’t quite place his face or remember his name.

“Not yet, right now I just need a good cry,” you replied sinking further into your seat.

“Alright.” He said, shrugging and not saying much, or really, nothing.

He sat across from you— not making eye contact but quietly observing the café.

Several questions raised in your mind: Where did he come from? Why is he here of all places? Did someone send him with the intention to make you feel even more like a fool than you already did?

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you asked when the silence became a little too long.

“No, not really...” he replied slowly. “Would you like me to leave?”

“No, I mean, it’s just-�� you hesitated, “You’re fine,”

“Ok then.”

Silence.

One look at him and it’d be hard to believe women find him approachable, but the man came up to you.

Much less, while you were on the verge of outright bawling in the middle of a café.

“What’s your name?” you asked, initiating conversation. You might as well since he was there.

“Yoongi. Yours?” You hesitated knowing it wasn’t fair to not give him your name.

“I’ll reassure you I’m not a stalker, at least not the bad kind.”

You let out an amused scoff, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

He chuckles and you couldn’t help but enjoy the sound.

Were you really that joy deprived?

“Ok then, I’m Min Yoongi, and I’m a stocker. As in I distribute and track merchandise in stores.” he reaches a hand out to shake and you can’t help but stare at it.

“Well go on I won’t bite,” you huffed a laugh, taking his hand and shaking it.

He smiles and you can’t help but return it.

Who is this guy?

“Why don’t we go for a walk?”

You contemplate his offer.

You had just met him but you hadn’t had casual conversation in a while… or hung out with friends for that matter. So maybe it’d be good for you after-

“Sure let’s go,” You replied immediately while standing up, maybe a little too quickly— your chair scratching the wooden floors and making a startling sound as you headed to the door.

He raised his brows in surprise at the sudden burst of energy before trailing behind you, ignoring the stares of café patrons.

“Hey wait up!”

-

This was another reason why you visited the quaint coffee shop often.

The park outside was always bustling with life and energy.

There was a little pond where ducks would glide across its surface diving from time to time, scavenging for the weeds at the bottom, maybe even getting sustenance from people who were ignorant of the ‘Do not feed the ducks’ sign.

It also had an open field where locals and families would enjoy the hot summer days by setting up little camps with blankets and food or even play small games of football or soccer.

While children played in the vast expanse of green, parents would sit back and converse with strangers forming new friendships. It was a place of change and growth and you loved it.

“So,” Yoongi continued as you both walked down the dirt path, “other than your name, and why you were crying in my café, is there anything about you I have yet to know?” Your cheeks flushed red as you shifted your sight to the ground.

“There’s nothing much really,” you replied with a shrug before backtracking his sentence, “Wait, your café?”

“Don’t change the subject. There’s got to be one thing about you… how about your favorite color?”

You purse your lips at the dodging of the question, albeit a basic one, but it was a start. “I guess Rainbow,”

He nodded with a hum, “Wise choice,”

You let out a huff of amusement, “Alright wise guy, what’s yours?”

He pondered for a moment before affirmatively replying, “Black,”

You hummed. “Kind of... dark, isn’t it?”

He turned around and shrugged, “I’d say the rainbow but you took it already,”

You scoffed, resuming your place beside him.

He continued asking basic questions to which you replied and vice versa.

You liked dogs, but him on the other hand didn’t have a favorite animal, at least until he adopted a poodle which made him keen on the creatures, more specifically one named Holly.

You were allergic to bees and he was allergic to cats.

You both enjoyed a variation of music from rap to classical piano music, but the question also led to a debate on what artist is the most superior to all.

Neither of you won, and concluded neither lost with valid points made during said argument.

It only felt like minutes had gone by but wasn’t until you looked at the time that you realized how late it was.

The crowd at the park had begun to thin out while shops surrounding the area were beginning to close for the day.

The once bright sunlight began to fade behind clouds as it began its descent to the horizon.

“I should probably be heading home,” you cut in politely before he could delve into the topic of what they would do in a post-apocalyptic world.

“Oh,” he replied, obviously disappointed.

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Well could I ask you one more thing?”

You nodded expecting it to be another ‘get to know you’ question or something along the lines of ‘if you had to would cut your arm or leg off?’ but it was something much more complicated.

“Can I get your number?”

You stiffened, unsure how to respond.

You weren’t sure if he was asking as a friend or a man with an ulterior motive.

Could you really do it?

Especially after you had just-

“I’m sorry that came out wrong,” He quickly mended, fumbling his words, realizing your distress.

“I think you’re really great, and I’d like us to continue talking. Just two people who enjoy each other’s company, you know?”

You looked up at him and saw he was offering to be friends that would be nothing more.

You couldn’t deny: you had fun.

For the first time in a long time.

Maybe it wasn’t a relationship you needed, but a friendship.

You smiled, “I’d like that,”

You reached into your pocket pulling out your phone, “Here.”

You both swapped devices, putting in the respective numbers. Once the contact was added, you returned each device to the rightful owner.

He grinned, holding up his phone, “How about a contact photo?” 

You smiled, nodding as you  stood beside him while  he took a selfie of you side-by-side. Once the picture was taken he slid his phone into his pocket. “Thanks,” he glanced down at the phone, that darn smile growing on his face, “Y/N. I’ll talk to you soon?” 

You nodded and finally split ways.

As you began the trek toward your apartment a dopey smile remained plastered on your face.

Maybe everything would be alright.

[tyongf-nct]

accidental fate - jung jaehyun (2.3k)

The rain was pouring down in buckets as you walked quickly on the streets of the city, leaving the warmth and dryness of the coffee shop. You attempted to balance your school bag with the now steaming cup of caffeine and umbrella in each hand, probably looking like a hot mess but not caring too much anyway. The map on your phone directed you two more blocks until you found the bookstore, complete with a lounge and plenty of tables and chairs for students in the city to use while they shopped. According to their website, this bookstore had exactly the material you needed for your World Geography class that the library did not, and you had planned out several hours in today’s schedule to get all of the information you needed.

The bell on the door jingled as you walked in, tripping over the mat that was placed right in front of the door. A few customers watched you stumble, averting their attention as you smiled sheepishly and continued on. You placed the wet umbrella in a designated holder, shrugging off your coat in the relaxing temperature of the store. The ambiance was beautiful, it looked like one of those old-fashioned libraries. Rows upon rows of books covered the walls, the shelves stocked at full capacity with thousands of books. Dark wood tables and cushioned chairs were filled with university students clicking away on keyboards and heads buried in their books. You smiled to yourself, satisfied with finding the right environment to work on your project, and made you way over to the maze of shelves to find what you were here for.

After a few frustrating minutes of searching, you gave up and asked one of the employees to help you find your reading material. He directed you to the right section and you selected a few options on the history of England’s land during the medieval era to buy. You sat down at one of the long wooden tables, admiring the smooth, dark surface before placing all of your supplies out in front of you. With your laptop on and paper up and loaded, you got to work on your research, underlining and highlighting the information you felt would make your paper stronger. You reached over absentmindedly to grab your coffee, knocking it over in the process.

You cursed under your breath as your coffee spilled over the entire table, soaking not only your notes and edges of your books, but the front of your white top as well. You scramble to move everything off the table, trying to peel back your now see-through shirt from your chest as the hot brown liquid destroys everything in its path, wrecking all of your hard work and the color of your shirt.

“Need some help with that?” A smooth voice from behind chirped in. 

You turned to look at its owner and stopped in your tracks, one hand pinching the hem of your shirt and the other holding a sopping piece of paper. The coffee dripped to the floor as you stared at the bookstore employee, a ridiculously cute boy that looked to be around your age. A few space-themed pins were attached to his work apron, toned muscles straining against a long-sleeve shirt. He grinned mischievously at you, dimples popping out on such smooth skin it looked almost blurred.

“Do you plan on just letting that continue to stain the table? Because, if so, that’s totally fine, but just let me know so I can clean it up before I get fired,” he smiles, cocking his head to the side. His hair does a sort of floppy thing, looking tussled in such a natural way you think there’s no way someone’s hair is that perfect.

You snap out of your daze and open your mouth, stuttering a few times before finally getting out your apology.

“Sorry. I am so sorry, I’ll clean this up right away.”

The boy’s grin was lopsided, the mix of his amused expression and messy hair making him look a little goofy. He reached over and started to help you clean up the mess you’d made, whipping out a towel from seemingly nowhere. You watched him with rapt attention, butterflies swarming in your stomach as the very attractive employee swiftly cleaned up the mess and placed your books back in your hands.

“I’m really sorry…” you mumbled, averting your eyes from his intense stare. The smile he gave you softened his features, the dimples making an appearance once again.

“Don’t worry about it, accidents happen.” He swipes the towel across the table one last time, effectively cleaning the mess you’d made, and turns to focus his attention on you. His eyes dart down at your torso just momentarily, as if he wanted to look at your bra that was definitely peeking through right now but didn’t want to be rude.

“Um, I have an extra jacket in the back if you want to borrow it?” He clears his throat, eyes flitting around nervously. You feel your face heat and laugh awkwardly, grabbing your coat that was hanging on the back of the chair and hugging it tightly.

“That’s alright, I have my own. Thank you though, seriously, I’m really sorry. I can be a little clumsy, apparently,” you say, and he meets your eyes again, grinning.

“Apparently.”

Unsure how to respond, or what to do next, you shift uncomfortably and try not to stare at his face. 

“Well, I-I’m just going to go now, before I ruin anything else,” you laugh, voice cracking slightly. You start to turn around but stop abruptly when he speaks up again.

“Hey, do you like graphic novels?” He asks suddenly. You raise an eyebrow, confused at the randomness of his question, and look down at his name tag for the first time. Jaehyun.

“Huh?”

“Do you like graphic novels?” He offers no further explanation, only staring back at you as you stand frozen and damp.

“Uhm, I guess not? To be honest I’ve never read one,” you admit, biting your lip uncertainly. He grins widely at that, perking up with excitement. You’re about to ask why he’s wondering when he dashes off into the rows of shelves. Your mouth hangs open, the words still sitting on the tip of your tongue when Jaehyun suddenly appears again, with a stack of what must be comic books in one hand.

“This series is really good, the fifth installment just came out but we don’t have it yet,” he frowns, shoving the books into your hands. You struggle to balance all of your things, trying not to get the comics stained with coffee as well. Your face is stuck in an expression of confusion as you stand there unmoving, unsure if you should thank him or not.

“Oh! I didn’t explain,” he laughs to himself, “I just noticed you seemed to be having a rough time, what with your tripping as you walked in and now the coffee situation. I figured maybe reading these could cheer you up. They’re very addictive,” he adds. You stare back at him, cracking a smile at the thought of him, a complete stranger, doing something--though strange--so considerate. Also, the fact that he watched you make a mess of yourself not once but twice was embarrassing but cute, and you wondered how long he was watching until he came up to you at the table.

“Thank you, Jaehyun,” you say. He looks bewildered at your mentioning of his name and you point at his nametag, realization crossing his beautiful features.

“Oh,” he laughs, “Right. Well, don’t mention it,” he smiles his award-winning smile again, shiny white teeth peeking through full pink lips. “When you finish those you have to report back to me, okay? A discussion will need to be made.” His serious choice of words make a nervous giggle bubble up inside of you, escaping as you eye him uncertainly. 

“Yes, sir,” you mock-solute, the smile dropping from your face when you realize your poor choice of wording. Jaehyun only laughs in response, nodding as if satisfied with where he carried the conversation.

“I didn’t catch your name,” he says, shoving his hands into his jean pockets.

“Oh, it’s y/n, sorry. I’ll, um, see you later, I guess? You know, to return the comics,” you start to back away, cautious of your footing this time.

“Graphic novels,” he reminds you, and you nod, hand on the door.

“Right! Graphic novels!” You hurry out of the door, bumping into a few pedestrians as you make your way back to the university. Your face is hot and your stomach is jumping around inside of you, not sure what just happened.

________________________________________________________________

One week later, you found your way back to the bookstore, wandering the aisles as you tried to look for Jaehyun casually. Stupidly, you hadn’t bothered to get his number, and you had been regretting that the entire week. It turns out, The Adventures of Actaeon and His Arduous Adversaries was quite a captivating read. You weren’t even sure whether to read them in the first place, but the memory of Jaehyun grinning fondly at you had convinced you.

After some time, you stumbled across Jaehyun and the both of you were seated at one of the long tables now, huddled in a corner.

“Look, I’m not saying you have to agree with me, but Lord Astrid definitely had some good points!” You argued, slapping a hand on the table. The patrons in the bookstore looked at you in various degrees of curiosity and annoyance, and you lowered your head before turning back to Jaehyun.

He scoffed, rolling his eyes and tossing back his head, soft hair flopping in various directions.

“You’re just saying that because you’re a new reader. Just wait until you get to the fifth installment, everything changes in that one! I can’t believe you would side with a dictator,” he mumbles, narrowing his eyes at you. You giggled, the offended look on his face reminding you of just how geeky you sounded right now. Never did you think you’d be debating the morals of an evil space lizard with a boy in a random bookstore, but here you were. Jaehyun cracked a smile, shaking his head and leaning back in the chair.

“Well, I’m ready to read it. You were the one who didn’t have it ready for me today,” you pointed out, shrugging and crossing your arms. While the thought of reading a comic book series about intergalactic space lizards have never been appealing before, you were embarrassed to admit that you had binged the first four in just one week, running back to Jaehyun’s stupid cocky face to grudgingly ask for the next one.

“I told you, the shipment is just late. I chose express shipping, but I guess the company is backed up on orders or something,” he frowned, full lips pouting in such a cute way it made your heart flutter in your chest. The fact that he was considerate enough to specially order it for you made your face flush, a sheepish grin taking over. Jaehyun looked at you questioningly, but you just shook your head in response, wanting to change the subject before you blurted out something even more embarrassing. Despite this being only your second interaction with him, you felt like you had known him forever. He was kind, funny, and definitely a giant nerd. It turned out, he had a huge love for all things space, rambling on and on about planets and galaxies and how there was going to be a meteor shower soon, “The first one in such a long time, y/n!”

“Okay, okay,” you ceded, leaning back in the chair to copy his pose. He glanced at his watch, sighing before standing. Your heart dropped, not wanting him to leave.

“Ugh, my lunch break is over. I don’t have to work tomorrow, though, do you want to study together or something?” Jaehyun asked. You smiled again, excited at the idea of spending more time with him.

“Yes! I mean, th-that would be nice,” you cough. He grins at your enthusiasm, slipping you a piece of paper before dashing off into the shelves.

You look at the paper, a smiley face drawn on it next to a phone number. His phone number. You pump the fist with your air silently and save him as a contact into your phone, sending him a simple “It’s y/n” so he can have yours as well. He responds almost immediately with another smiley face, and you melt internally. 

You stare at your phone that evening, praying that he’ll text you first with details about tomorrow’s study date. Well, it wasn’t exactly a date, but you hoped he thought of it that way secretly. After hours of no text, you start to feel deflated. Maybe he forgot? Or maybe he just doesn’t want to see you outside of his work hours. Your shoulders are sagging when your phone buzzes, and you leap off your bed to go grab it from the desk.

Jaehyun: Are you still down for a study session tomorrow? I have some work I need to get done. Also, Actaeon is waiting for you in the store ;)

You squeal, hopping up and down excitedly before taking a deep breath, reminding yourself that you’re just getting to know him.

Y/n: Yes, sounds great! And I can’t wait :)

You flop down on the sheets, kicking your legs in victory a few times before sighing happily. You fell asleep with a smile on your face, ready to use the excuse of homework and graphic novels to spend more time with this strange but adorable boy.

[kae-karo]

What are your opinions on the debate going on in the phandom about adults writing smut about minors?

oof first of all i haven’t seen this argument/discussion myself, and it is a seriously challenging topic to address but i’ll do my best to express my thoughts on the matter - please note, i fully intend to talk about both sides to this discussion but i have to start somewhere, so if people are intent on arguing, at least read the entire thing first

on one hand, there are many adults who deal with their experiences or traumas they had at a younger age through writing - and i understand the argument not to publish those works so as to prevent normalizing it, but there are also kids who are that age who have experienced/are experiencing similar things, and who might benefit from seeing that someone else experienced it as well (and is doing okay/still surviving/etc as an adult). they may also be providing advice that they’d wished they had in that situation, or prior to that situation, that kids who are or might end up going through that situation could benefit from. and i don’t necessarily believe that adults shouldn’t be ‘allowed’ to write about those topics, because again, it may be therapeutic both for them to write it and for others at that age to read it, but i think that it should be very clearly tagged so that people who want to avoid that content can avoid it

i also think that, while it isn’t everything, intent is important - an author who’s writing about underage sexual encounters with the intent of just....writing smut between minors for shits and giggles/cause they think it’s hot/etc is creating a more problematic situation than providing a space where other minors with similar experiences can go ‘oh, this happened to me, i’m not alone in feeling [whatever they feel] about it’. but authors who incorporate situations into their works in order to say ‘hey, i don’t think it’s necessarily good/right/etc that i had to experience this (whether it be trauma of some kind, sex before they were ready for it or just sex as a teenager, etc) but i want other people to see this and know that if they’re in the same boat, i’m okay now, and you’ll be okay too’. there’s also something to be said about having some wisdom/advice/knowledge looking back on the events and being able to impart that wisdom through a work

now, i absolutely need to address the other side of the argument here: nobody, kids or otherwise, should feel pressured into having sexual encounters before they’re ready. and the thing that writing a lot of underage smut can do is it can create the stigma (or, really, propagate the stigma) that having sexual encounters at a young age is normal and expected. now, that’s not to say kids aren’t having sexual encounters at that age - i have no doubt that some of them are, but nobody should feel like they’re ‘behind’ or strange or whatever for not wanting to engage in sexual behaviors

and that’s like. layer one of the many problems that can occur - but i also see the flipside of this which is to say ‘well if kids are having sex at that age, shouldn’t they at least be exposed to some healthier sexual behaviors they might not see from peers/etc?’ which, yeah, i agree with that - i don’t necessarily agree that kids should be having sex, but if they are, then yeah let’s help educate where we can. but it doesn’t change the potential downsides, including the fact that there are just as many fics with misinformation about sex as there are that encourage healthy sex. and to the argument about better sex ed (and ofc that we should not relying on fandoms to relay healthy sexual behaviors) - yeah, duh, but kids may stumble into a fandom/be a part of a fandom without having any access to (reliable) health resources on sex (again, not that fic is reliable, but there are definitely authors out there making an effort). they may also be in situations where they wouldn’t be able to/allowed to visit planned parenthood’s (or equivalent’s) website to research that information themselves, either because of parents or someone else, but might be able to get away with reading fic. this is a whole other discussion i think but the only point here is that fic can be another potential tool for either good information or misinformation for kids who are already sexually active

i also often see the ‘adults are sexualizing minors’ argument, but i think this one’s a bit off base - yes, there are adults that are sexualizing minors which is a very very wrong thing to do, but i really don’t think every single person writing about sexual encounters between minors is doing so in a ‘it’s hot’ kind of way. again, i have to call back to the idea of writing to work through one’s own experiences - most authors will say they’re writing about the things that happened to them as kids, through the lens of a character that’s more well-known. the goal, as with a lot of writing, is to say ‘hey, look, this is a story about me and how i went through this thing, did this happen to anyone else? if so, we’re not alone, and i think things are gonna turn out okay’. or, as mentioned before, to add some kind of layer of advice or wisdom that’s come with time

anyway, on a very high level, i don’t think i’ll ever be able to lay down a blanket statement that says ‘[adults writing smut about minors/adults not writing smut about minors] is the Correct thing’ because that puts a lot of discouragement in both directions - kids that see that might get the idea that hey, they’re not ever going to be allowed to write about what happened to them/what’s happening right now/what they wish had happened once they reach adulthood/reach some kind of higher understanding about it because it might get ripped apart, and adults are told that they can’t write about it either, in spite of the fact that it allows them to help understand/cope with/advise on/reflect on what happened to them. but by the same token, you will always have the trash people who just write underage smut cause it’s hot and they want to, with little to no regard for how that could impact some kid who’s already feeling immense pressure to engage in sexual acts or who may have, up until reading the fifth fic about underage sex, had no interest in sex but now they think it’s a part of being a teen and they should be seeking it out. and the really dangerous thing about all that is it’s very very hard to tell what kind of story is actually being told when you stumble onto a fic at 2am that happens to include underage sex in the tags. the whole thing is too gray to say ‘it’s always right or wrong’

now, all that said, i personally don’t feel comfortable writing about/reading underage smut because i feel like all the things i experienced as a teenager are things that weren’t inherent to the fact that i was a teenager, and i’m perfectly comfortable reading/writing them through the lens of an adult character

[kivablog3]

Sylvia’s Cooking

I just got my first Stonewall 50 email. At the bottom of the email in the small print it says Heritage of Pride™, which means it’s still run by the same guys as always, except under more scrutiny now, after getting the march on Channel 7 and with the whole world coming next year to physically or spiritually fit into that little pie-wedge space on Christopher Street where the Stonewall Inn bar is located. This World Pride thing isn’t just an advertising slogan they came up with at HoP, it’s a Thing, like Stonewall 50’s a Thing. My therapist, who’s very active in the community and probably gets lots of interesting emails from various Things, told me it happens at a different city’s Pride each year.

And next year, of course, they’re coming to New York, because it’ll be the 50th Anniversary of the night Sylvia Rivera and her friend Marsha P. Johnson (who I never met, and who may have thrown the first punch, there are scholarly debates on this point, but I am told that Sylvia firmly insisted that she was the first one who punched a cop, it’s like the debate over Lexington and Concord, they’re not sure exactly where the Revolution started but we know that they started it) threw out the first punches to start the legendary three-day riot, rather than just get in the police van like always, right in front of the Stonewall Inn. The night the drag queens finally began to fight back. It made a sound heard ‘round the world, and it’s still reverberating, and if anything really changed the course of history in that wretched year of 1969, that surely did.

It reached me in the front seat of our car when I was with my mom one Saturday, when for once my sister wasn’t with us. I used to like tagging along on her Saturday visits to her office, wherever that was. As we were about to drive away from the small airfield where she worked as a secretary to go to some thing where co-workers were already playing bad country music, I asked her what a homosexual was. It was a sunny day and there was no one else around for a mile in any direction. It was the Summer of 1969, of course, and I was eleven years old.

I can only suppose this is just after I’d heard of Stonewall in the news. It was the first time I’d ever brought up sex as a topic of discussion with my mother, and I did this with some trepidation. I sort of knew this wasn’t her favorite topic of conversation generally, sex, much less transgressive sex. The kind hippies had. Maybe some of them were homosexual, who knew? So I persisted in my line of inquiry. What I didn’t know was that she’d been waiting for some version of that question ever since she’d stopped dressing me in dresses, when I was two.

She put the transmission back in park, turned the engine off, sighed, and for once didn’t light a cigarette before we started what turned out to be a lengthy, meandering conversation, which wandered after a while into related and then tangential topics, and which ended with me correcting her on some minor misunderstandings as to how gonorrhea was transmitted, at which point things kind of ground to a halt and she started the car up.

The whole thing probably took an hour. She used to joke that she’d had the Talk with me, the generalized birds and bees talk, because we did touch on conventional sex and How Babies Are Made, but that I had ended up explaining some things to her, instead, which shouldn’t have surprised her. I did read a lot, after all. I probably already knew a couple of things about homosexuals, but I wanted an explanation of how they actually Did It, and as squirmy as that made me, I wheedled it out of her. I could’ve asked her more about how a male-female couple had sex, but that wasn’t what was on my mind. She wasn’t happy about it, and did her best to make it clear that it was all gross and disgusting. I think she made a face when she was explaining lesbians to me. I liked the sound of the word the first time I heard it, tbh: Lesbian. It sounded soft and fuzzy.

I remember wondering about the feasibility of anal sex, as she sketchily and hastily outlined it, which apparently was what men did together; but what women did together sounded really kind of fun and not nearly as difficult. She didn’t want to talk about that, though, and I do remember that it was around there that the discussion went off into the weeds, to things related and not. Eventually we ended up at syphilis and gonorrhea (aka “VD,” or venereal disease, where venereal=“vaginally transmitted,” rather than “of or having to do with the goddess or planet Venus” — clearly a term invented by men) and I explained some of the then-current science on transmission to her, i.e., you don’t catch it from dirty toilet seats in public restrooms. Not girls, not boys, it’s a myth, mom. They told us in science.

All that was fifty years ago, as of next June. The following June, in 1970, they had the first Christopher Street Liberation Day March, so 2020 is the fiftieth anniversary of the March. But next year is the Big One. It looks like this anniversary will be just as controlled and careful as the 25th anniversary in 1994 was huge and utterly chaotic and wonderfully random, with 200,000 marchers from around the world. We took over Central Park. We took over freakin’ Midtown. It rocked.

Well, not next time. No more of that anarcho-festive celebration stuff. Now you have to be part of a signed-up contingent to be part of the march, and those slots are limited. And no more hopping in-and-out from the sidewalk, apparently. They want everyone in a marching contingent to wear the same t-shirts, ffs. It has to be controlled, as well as going backwards (starting a few blocks north of Christopher, past the Stonewall the wrong way, and up Fifth Avenue, what the fuck?) I’m told some of the people in the Village are tired of the crowds and the noise. They can do what people do in Austin when SXSW comes along: leave town. Tiniest quantum violin playing.

Now that it’s a TV show, I guess it has to run on time and look good on camera. They’ll have a beautifully made-up drag queen doing commentary like last year, along with the usual probably-white cis-guy-&-cis-gal parade anchors. I don’t know where they find those. It’ll become another tradition soon, that trio as parade anchors, now that scientists have established that str8 people in statistically significant numbers will watch drag queens on television and thus advertising time can be sold for this event. It’ll be just like the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, or the Fourth of July, only with One of Us in the booth along with two of them.

“And you know, Mike, the rainbow flag has been a unifying symbol in the LGBT community since it was first designed in 1978, and did you know that originally it had eight stripes….” There will be carefully-timed performances in front of the Stonewall, and commercial breaks. Some of the stories people tell will break your heart, some will make it sing. Plus commercials, did I mention the commercials? You can record it and FF through them. I did. I stopped this year to watch Chelsea and Rusty talking about Sylvia, which is what makes me think of them all, along with the fact that Sylvia and Marsha deserve statues, and you get reminded of that every June. I’d love to have a statue of the two of them at the Stonewall National Monument, which technically is the little triangular pie-slice shaped park, the benches and the wrought-iron fencing, where you can sit next to the statues representing gay men and women from the 1980s. They should add Sylvia and Marsha.

The whole parade on TV represents some kind of weird queer communications breakthrough, I guess. And now that it’s on every year, I suppose it has to be faaaaaaabulouss! I guess we can record it and go, too. And watch. There were some forums recently at the Center, maybe just one, where people could come and complain about the corporatization of Pride, and the most-of-us not marching thing, and the reverse-route thing where it just kind of ends around 28th Street for no apparent reason, and ask for things they won’t get, but that part’s over and it’s time for Early Bird sign-up.

Whatever. Sylvia and Marsha are the mothers of us all, both trannies and everyone else that fits under this patched, unwieldy tent called “LGBTQ.” We argue, some of us incessantly, about which part of the tent is what, and whether this part is even really part of the same tent as that other part of the tent, but no one argues with the fact that Sylvia and Marsha put up the first tent poles. That may not be the most elegant metaphor, but I’m going with it. Never apologize for your art.

And it’s kind of okay, I think now, or at least I’m trying to convince myself it is, that I never realized “who” Sylvia was, even though at least two people said I should talk to her because I was “interested in politics.” Hm? Oh, ok. No one ever said why. Ffs.

But it felt sort of like I knew Sylvia, the way it feels like I know these professors and other people who my wife works with, after I hear her describe them a few times. She’s a union delegate as well as a math professor, so she knows a lot of people. By now I also know a lot about professors in general. And in the same way I realized after a while from talking to people around T-House, conversations in which she came up, often at vital junctures, that Sylvia was the Mom around the place: she made dinner, I knew that much, and she did a lot of other things to keep Transy* House, Chelsea and Rusty’s house, from burning down, falling over, and sinking during those raucous years around the end of the 20th century. She seemed quite nice when I was introduced across a crowded room downstairs, which actually happened twice I think. She smiled and said hi, I do remember that. She seemed nice.

That, in and of itself, was quite difficult for some people I was around back then — this was and still is New York, the Attitude Capital of the Western Hemisphere and, during Fashion Weeks, the Tribeca Film Festival, and the General Assembly, perhaps the world — but from my brief impression she seemed genuine, and older in a reassuring way when I was twenty years younger. She gave off these hippie-mama vibes, just by making dinner. In a house where a whole lot of chaos happened, and necessarily so given how many trans kids with no other home came through there — because Chelsea and Rusty never turned anyone away, not as far as I know — not to mention how much fun was had there on a regular basis, at least some of it destructive of property, she just looked to me, in a vortex of drama, like a pole of stability.

Maybe that’s shaped by how people talked about her. Everyone said how nice she was; but I wasn’t over there often enough to run into her when she was (a) there and (b) had a free moment, and didn’t know I should prioritize it anyway. And there were other people using up the oxygen in the room at any given time, including me. But it would have been awesome to truly know her.

I knew other people there, had my own reasons for being there. I lived with Kathleen and our two-year-old son in an apartment which was also on 16th Street, in Brooklyn, two blocks away. It was the Nineties, so it didn’t seem unusual to me that there was a house full of transfolx a short walk away, nor that my friend Jamie knew everyone there. Like, she knew everyone. She was the other pole of stability then, around the turn of the century. She doubtless knew Sylvia pretty well, and she probably told me enough to form an impression.

Now Chelsea and Rusty own a bookstore upstate, and T-House is long gone, replaced by the ineluctable tidal forces of gentrification, although there’s a queer history tour that stops at the site and tells a short version of The Story. I wish sometimes they could have a sort of T-House reunion, somewhere, somehow. I would very much like to find Jamie again, even if only online. And I do still wish I’d gotten to talk with Sylvia.

#HistoricalNearMisses

__________

Footnote: Everyone back then except Chelsea, more or less, called it that, but without the “s,” if you get what I mean. We don’t say it anymore, at least not when younger transfolx are around. People get really upset, and if it’s only been used to hurt you it’s a painful word, I get that. Yet it was our word then, and it didn’t hurt at all. It was a warm, friendly word. It was what we called each other, lovingly, and no one else had any reason to use it, and I miss it.

this article also appears at https://medium.com/@kivazo/sylvias-cooking-1b1b4f24e780

[invincibleparm]

Oh The Conspiracy!

Well, as this is my most passionate pet peeve, every time the reserve list comes up in the mainstream, it sparks conversation. Will they keep it? Will they finally Old Yeller this promise in the back yard and move forward? As I've written many time on the subject, I've had time to think about it. Is getting rid of the Reserve List a good idea? Recently what started this debate was a change.org petition that showed up on my Facebook feed. It simply stated that the RL is outdated and for a past era and it is not being fair to the MTG community to deprive players interested in other formats that are cost-prohibitive. I've ranted about it. I've explained it. I've had impassioned speeches at tournaments. Now, I break down what I think are the secret reasons the RL still stands. Let's recap the problem: wizards printed a reprint called Chronicles that put everyone on high priority alert about the value of their investment. Chronicles reprinted staples and drove the prices of those cards down, along with cards not even reprinted. This was a dark time for MTG and its community. Would Magic survive? Of course the answer was yes. The 'Promise' came into being. Wizards stated, to keep collectors happy, the ones that supported the game in the beginning (by buying the majority of the small product launches up I might add), that they would not print a certain amount of cards. They added and added to that list until we have the finalized list we have today. Make no mistake on the first count, Wizards didn't do this solely for the community and if you think that, best you think again. Wizards is a company and needed to put a wet blanket on the dumpster fire that was Chronicles to stay a company. The jury is out whether Chronicles would have been the end of the line, with such stelllar sets like Homelands, Fallen Empires also on the shelves. This was not a good time period for Wizards and it is easy to blame Chronicles for all the woes. The RL was a way to stem the tide until they could fix the myriad of problems with their card game. So it's not really a matter of rewarding their long-time fans, because never again would they do that. It was a odd exception that no other company would ever make. Did Garfield and Gang realize how format warping those cards were? Sure. Did they think the RL was a simple way to eliminate those cards that could cause problems? Perhaps, but they started making T 1 and 2 to separate them. They had their own formats and the two shall never meet. People could keep playing a warped meta and being completely happy. As the sets continued to rotate, what is now vintage could have still been supported and supplemental material of those cards could still be printed. So, the RL was a knee-jerk reaction at a time the company was new. They made a hasty promise that I think they might have come to regret. More on that later. So, the RL was to instil trust in collectors that their collections would retain value. Since wizards doesn't meddle in the secondary market, how could they promise that? A company cannot guarantee the value of its products. This is the first mistake of WoTC and the RL. IF THE COMPANY FOLDED FIVE YEARS FROM NOW AND NO ONE PLAYED IT, HOW DO COLLECTORS GET THEIR VALUE? Simply, they wouldn't. That is like saying Wizards would pay collectors for the loss on investment. Buying a pack of magic cards is not buying stock in the company in a legal way. Intangible stock, yes, as in you are supporting them, but you are not becoming a shareholder. So the promise is a flimsy pretext to stave off going under. Also, where is the value line of a collectors investment? They never set a minimum or a maximum on value. It can be argued that anything above the price a printing the card is a win, or over the price of a pack. Winning! Instead we have a handful of cards over 10000 and rising. Another reason it's a knee-jerk, panicked reaction is they didn't think to enter into a time frame. Again, promising their cards will always retain value is not looking at life. Millions of things could happen to upend Magic as we know it and where are those collectors then? This is, what I think is the secret; Wizards is letting the bubble burst before they do anything. See, wizards said they wouldn't reprint the cards to damage the collectors market, but what if they understood that every bubble crashes? There are interesting parallels between MTG and the 2008 housing crisis: Banks weren't making nearly enough money, so they started giving loans to people that didn't qualify. Everyone wants a home, right? So they started giving loans to people with unverified income, making minimum wage, and offering teaser rates for the first six months to a year of no interest. Then, the higher interest rates, ones people couldn't afford kicked in. For the banks, this is actually a good deal because of two factors. 1. The people can't pay, the bank gets the house back to sell again 2. The banks and investment firms started selling bets on whether the housing market was going to crash or not, based on the fact that housing was always a solid investment. Much like the way that people in collecting Magic believe it is a solid investment. So soon the default rate was 30% in mid 2007. House prices were skyrocketing because so many people were buying them that money was being made hand over fist. Like people selling magic cards. The success of the RL and the continuing value of the cards and non-reserve list cards went up based on the solid evidence that the value only goes up, much like the housing market. Some cards like Elesh Norn were 60$ for no reason. She wasn't a staple, but because she was a mythic one-off printing, she had value. So now the housing crisis hits, only no one knew it was coming but a select few. No one knew that it was happening until it was almost over. I believe we are in the crash right now for Magic. Prices are coming down for a variety of factors, but the RL stays strong. Except, the RL secondary market is a house of cards waiting for a strong breeze. Why? Because who is buying? I'll tell you who; other collectors, MTG shops, and the occasional player that happens to have money to sink into their dream deck and can justify the money, which isn't a lot. So you have houses that no one can afford because the prices have spiked with all the buying, and you have magic cards priced out of reach. The average person cannot afford either house or high-end magic cards. So is a Underground Sea really valued at the retail list price if it doesn't sell? No. Because it sits there and takes shelf. The bubble has burst because there isn't a buyers market anymore because the market is in space now. The prices are inflated and people haven't clued in to the end. Sure, one person might buy that beta Mox Sapphire for 5000$, it only takes one, right? But how long do you wait to sell it? A year comparison on eBay and TCG shows that sellers are now dropping those prices because something is better than waiting years. How do you sell something so luxury in a stale market? Now here comes the conspiracy; wizards wants it to happen. The RL is something Wizards has spoken out against and something they would really love to get rid of, but holds on to their promise. If the collectors and secondary market sellers tank their own market by pricing themselves out of said market and crashing it into oblivion, then wizards aren't the bad guys. Instead, they can turn around and shrug and say "we let you run the boat, you are the ones that ran it into the shore". They would keep their promise and then, once the market is rumble, press onwards with the abolition of the RL and print money. They know it, you know it. Collectors and secondary market sellers got too greedy and pushed prices too far and now they are seeing the damage. Do I think a alpha black lotus deserves a 40,000$ price tag? Yes. Due to rarity and condition, I sure do. Do I believe a dual land like a tundra should be 330$? No. It's land. Nothing in a game where land is the basis of the operation of the deck should be out of range. And before you argue that there is plenty of lands and that people can make due with alternatives, I'm saying people shouldn't have to. You want to play legacy but only have shocks in a fast format? No, you are statistically giving your opponent the game Just don't play those formats? How is that fair? It's not, and it is elitism at its finest.holding a high price for entry is a privilege game and allows the haves to be able to keep challengers away from their formats and better their odds. Magic should never be a pay to win game anymore than cracking pack already makes it. No one should not be allowed to play this game in the format they choose. It also, in magic circles, brings a prestige that is bought with money. Oh yeah, I foiled my deck and it's worth money. Players don't talk about how good their decks are, just how expensive. I've done it many times and I've seen thousands do it. It's like wearing a Rolex and keep bringing up reasons to bring it up or look at the time so people notice it. But what if the bubble is t all the way burst? The prices on a bunch of stuff has gone down, but there still exists a imbalance. That is where China becomes involved. So, in June of 2016, Wizards put out an articles about counterfeits and preened for a few months about going after counterfeiters. After the initial fear disappeared, Wizards stopped. How do you know they stopped? Because they don't talk about it. Proxies are running wild and WoTC remains super silent. Why? What follows will be a extremely unpopular opinion but bear with me. They want the counterfeits to devalue the market further. I'm not saying they are having tea with counterfeiters and discussing all the things that need to happen, I am saying they are allowing it to happen because it suites their purposes. The further degrading of the secondary market is key to allowing wizards the freedom to print every card again, make more money, and further counterfeit proof their future product. If counterfeits keep getting better, no one needs to buy the real thing. At the local GP that just ran, I saw them there, playing in decks. Some were good, some were bad. But playing in events, they were there. So the average player doesn't need to save up for a Black Lotus, they buy a proxy for 3$. Each proxy that hits the markets is one less card bought off the secondary market. Less cards sold means lowering prices. I have heard a lot of people say that when the fakes are indistinguishable from real, they will buy them. And I'm not saying that wizards condones it, but again, it would work out in their favour. The secondary market monster they created in the 90s would slowly die a painful death. I'm not saying that people won't buy super expensive cards, but there is no longer demand. I am also not advocating buying these proxy cards, I'm just pointing out that their existence plays a role in the next couple of years. The key here is the end of the RL. Do you think Hasbro, WoTC parent company, wants to cling to a 26 year old promise? No, they have no horse in that particular race. They want to make money and Magic makes them money.Magic can make them even more money and you better believe that is what they want. So, cut the RL. Don't vomit print every card, but make every card a viable target for reprinting. Do it slowly, allow people who have had up to 26 years sitting on their hoard to make some money and bring stability back to the secondary market. Because like it or not, you are controlling part of the secondary market even if you are not open about it. Modern Masters, Eternal Masters, even conspiracy and commander, all have reprints that affect the secondary market. Jace has dropped almost 50%, where is you promise of value in him for a collector? Testing the waters with reprints has been a smart way to go about eliminating the reserve list, to prove that market pricing can still reap a profit, albeit a smaller one. SCG, CF, TCG etc, will still make money off cards and still stay in business. No no reprint policies have hurt modern and standard, why do you think it would effect vintage and legacy? New boarder, different art, it will effect the prices but not as much as you think. Old art, rarity, and hubris will keep old RL cards valuable after a reprint, just not as valuable. #endthereservelist

[asfeedin]

What Is a Natural Link? (A Good Link)

In the SEO world, terms like natural links, quality links, and good links are thrown around like crazy.

Whether you’re going into a client pitch, attending a search marketing conference, or your boss asks you why you aren’t getting quality links, it’s important to know (and be able to explain) all the different types of links.

This chapter will help you:

Understand each type of link by providing you with definitions.

Determine which types of links may be able to help boost your rankings.

Figure out which types of links you may want to add to a disavow sheet.

Although there is normally debate on specific types of links (.edu and relevant, manually-updated directories, for example), this will be a good baseline for you to use.

Types of Links

Natural Links

A natural link is one that occurs organically (not easily seen as being placed by your company).

Natural links don’t:

Have tracking parameters.

Exist within sponsored or paid content.

Redirect through JavaScript or monetization tools.

A natural link exists as a reference to a piece of content, website, or source.

Unnatural Links

Unnatural links are any links that are paid for.

These types of links can be placed and tracked by PR firms and media buyers, or monetized through affiliate programs, CPC campaigns, influencers, or monetization scripts.

If these links aren’t nofollowed, Google can potentially take manual action on your site or your site could be negatively impacted algorithmically (most likely by Penguin), because they are not earned/natural.

What are unnatural links? Links:

With tracking parameters (e.g., UTM source and medium).

Within sponsored content on a site (because search engines do not know who paid for the content to be placed).

From sites using monetization scripts because scripts say you get paid for linking to retailers.

You can find these in the site’s code, outbound redirects, and other mappable techniques.

Semi-natural Link

On occasion, you’ll discover a “mixed” link pattern. For example, you may find a natural link that uses tracking parameters.

Let’s say you click through from an influencer who has been paid to share a link. That link will lead to the landing page that may have the tracking parameters in place.

Bloggers, aggregators, and others who follow that link may copy and paste it directly into their site giving natural links that also have these parameters. This could result in an unnatural but organic link scheme.

To help resolve this, make sure that as a person reaches your site through a tracked link, you set a redirect to pass the parameters but also resolve to the natural page structure. (i.e., the utm_campaign redirects to a version without any UTM parameters).

Now you’ll have the standard and non-tracked URL as the one they use and be able to properly attribute sales, traffic, and leads back to the original site.

You can still measure the halo effect of additional links and exposure by pulling a link acquisition report and crawling/scraping the likes, shares, and retweets from the initial influencer.

What Are Quality Links?

Quality links are links that come from high-quality sites.

This definition will change depending on the quality of the SEO you’re talking to. Here is what I look at to determine the quality of a website:

The site is niche, or at least has a regularly updated section about the topic.

There are no outbound links to adult, illegal, payday, or scam sites.

You won’t be able to see that they allow sponsored content (with the exception of clearly marked advertorials).

Media kits and publicly viewable advertising sections do not have a price for or mention of text links or backlinks.

Finding them in the Google news feed is a good sign that they are trustworthy or high quality in Google’s eyes.

Acquired links will be by staff writers and not contributors. Contributors can be bought more easily and many large publications have begun nofollowing their links. Do a Google search for Huffington Post and nofollow and you’ll see multiple discussions from when they flipped the switch.

The links come from body copy. That has to be earned – unlike blog comments, forum mentions, press releases, and other areas where anyone can easily build or buy links.

What Makes a Good Link?

A good link is different than a quality link. It can be any type of link that can have a positive impact with a bit less risk.

The factors of a good link vs. bad link can also change based on the type of SEO you’re doing local vs. national and country-specific vs. international – Russia and Yandex vs. the UK and Google).

A good link for Yandex should be ones that are approved by the Russian government and aren’t also linking to sites that have banned content, contraband, and things that are forbidden in Yandex.

Alcohol gifts, for example, could potentially be bad for Yandex traffic, but good links for other countries and search engines.

Local directories that are managed, maintained, and don’t have a submit your site option may be good for local SEO, but probably not national because of the content relevance and potential quality.

If they have a lot of age and continuously clean out old sites, dead sites and 4XX errors they may be beneficial instead of harmful.

If you notice I’m saying <strong>may</strong> or <strong>might,</strong> it’s because there is no solid yes or no. It depends on the specific situation and website.

You could have a blogger who has great niche content but no age or authority and may quit blogging in a year. Although it looks like a good link, it would fall under “maybe” or “OK” for me. That is 100% debatable.

Then there is an established blog without a huge following that sticks to its niche. They are not doing well in Google though with organic even though they have great content. This would fall under “OK” for me as well.

Another could be a new blog that is content relevant but doesn’t have a ton of SEO traffic, but does have a lot of engaged readers.

This would be a good link for me because they have a quality audience and if they continue down the niche path they could be a great source of traffic/sales and also pass authority from their links for SEO.

The trick with good backlinks is to determine and watch how they impact you currently and what they may do in the future.

Each site is unique and each link should be considered independently before disavowing it as bad or keeping it as good/quality.

How Can You Build Quality Links?

You’ll find a ton of posts on Search Engine Journal about building quality links, including a few I’ve written. (Use the search box and you’ll find them.)

What works best for me is always keeping a few things in mind when creating copy that I want to get links for.

Who have I empowered or made feel important or have an emotional reaction?

Why would that person want to share, link to or call out my content by tagging a friend in it?

Did I provide a solution to a common or unique problem?

What is unique, special, or different about how I’m presenting this content?

Which ways have I better explained, detailed, or given examples of something complex, funny, or useful?

How have I enabled people to easily share and link to this content?

Where have I advertised it so that I can keep it in front of people who can give me quality backlinks and references (sometimes this is an influencer who has a large following of bloggers and journalists)?

When someone mentions natural links, it’s all about quality. That means they can’t be easily acquired, they’re in a good SEO neighborhood, and that they are in topically related content sites that match your services, stores, site, or niche.

Focusing on quality over quantity is what can help to protect your site as Google updates.

More importantly, focusing on quality can help constantly bring in relevant readers through referring sites who may also become customers, engaged readers, and a new source of links and social media traffic.

Featured Image Credit: Paulo Bobita

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[karinaibond]

What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink)

With tradeshow season and Q4 coming up, terms like natural links, quality links, and good links are going to be thrown around like crazy.

Whether you’re going into a client pitch, attending a search marketing conference, or your boss asks you why you aren’t getting quality links, it’s important to know (and be able to explain) all the different types of links.

This post will help you to understand each type of link, provide you with definitions, and also help you determine which types of links may be able to help boost your rankings – and which you may want to add to a disavow sheet.

Although there is normally debate on specific types of links (.edu and relevant, manually-updated directories, for example), this will be a good baseline for you to use.

What is a Natural Backlink

Natural Link

A natural link is one that occurs organically (not easily seen as being placed by your company).

Natural links don’t:

Have tracking parameters.

Exist within sponsored or paid content.

Redirect through JavaScripts or monetization tools.

A natural link exists as a reference to a piece of content, website, or source.

Unnatural Link

These are paid for, can be placed and tracked by PR firms, media buyers or are being monetized through affiliate programs, CPC campaigns, influencers, or monetization scripts.

If they are do follow, then they can potentially lead to Google taking a manual action on your site or you could get hit by Penguin because they are not earned/natural.

What are unnatural links? Links:

With tracking parameters like UTM source and medium.

Within sponsored content on a site (since search engines do not know who paid for the content to be placed).

From sites using monetization scripts since some scripts say you get paid for linking to retailers.

You can find these in the site’s code, outbound redirects, and other mappable techniques.

Semi-natural Link

On occasion, you’ll discover a mixed link pattern. It is a natural link but uses tracking parameters for example.

If you click through from an influencer who has been paid to share a link.  That link will lead to the landing page that may have the tracking parameters in place.

Bloggers, aggregators, and others who follow that link may copy and paste it directly into their site giving natural links that also have these parameters. This could result in an unnatural but organic link scheme.

To help resolve this, make sure that as a person reaches your site through a tracked link, you set a redirect to pass the parameters but also resolve to the natural page structure. (i.e. the utm_campaign redirects to a version without any utm parameters).

Now you’ll have the standard and non-tracked URL as the one they use and be able to properly attribute sales, traffic, and leads back to the original site.

You can still measure the halo effect of additional links and exposure by pulling a link acquisition report and crawling/scraping the likes, shares, and retweets from the initial influencer.

What Are Quality Backlinks

Quality backlinks are links that come from high-quality sites.

This definition will change depending on the quality of the SEO you’re talking to, but for my agency and the ones I refer clients to, quality links come from quality sites that have at least most of this criteria:

The site is niche or at least has a regularly updated section about the topic.

There are no outbound links to adult, illegal, payday, or scam sites.

You won’t be able to see that they allow sponsored content (with the exception of clearly marked advertorials).

Media kits and publicly viewable advertising sections do not have a price for or mention of text links or backlinks.

Finding them in the Google news feed is a good sign that they are trustworthy or high quality in Google’s eyes.

Acquired links will be by staff writers and not contributors.  Contributors can be bought more easily and many large publications have begun nofollowing their links. Do a Google search for Huffington Post and NoFollow and you’ll see multiple discussions from when they flipped the switch.

They come from body copy that has to be earned.  That means no blog comments, forum mentions, press releases or other things which anyone can do or buy easily.

What Makes a Good Link

A good link is different than a quality link.  It can be any type of link that can have a positive impact with a bit less risk.

The factors of a good link vs. bad link can also change based on the type of SEO you’re doing (local vs. national and country specific vs. international – Russia and Yandex vs. the UK and Google).

A good link for Yandex should be ones that are approved by the Russian government and aren’t also linking to sites that have banned content, contraband, and things that are forbidden in Yandex. Alcohol gifts, for example, could potentially be bad for Yandex traffic, but good links for other countries and search engines.

Local directories that are managed, maintained, and don’t have a submit your site option may be good for local SEOs but probably not national because of the content relevance and potential quality.  If they have a lot of age and continuously clean out old sites, dead sites and 4XX errors they may be beneficial instead of harmful.

If you notice I’m saying may or might, it’s because there is no solid yes or no.  It depends on the specific situation and website.

You could have a blogger who has great niche content but no age or authority and may quit blogging in a year.  Although it looks like a good link, it would fall under “maybe” or “OK” for me.  That is 100 percent debatable.

Then there is an established blog without a huge following and sticks to its niche.  They are not doing well in Google though with organic even though they have great content.  This would fall under “OK” for me as well.

Another could be a new blog that is content relevant but doesn’t have a ton of SEO traffic but does have a lot of engaged readers.  This would be a good link for me because they have a quality audience and if they continue down the niche path they could be a great source of traffic/sales and also pass authority from their links for SEO.

The trick with good backlinks is to determine and watch how they impact you currently and what they may do in the future.  Each site is unique and each link should be considered independently before disavowing it as bad or keeping it as good/quality.

How Can You Build Quality Backlinks

You’ll find a ton of posts on Search Engine Journal about building quality links, including a few I’ve written. (Use the search box and you’ll find them.)

What works best for me is always keeping a few things in mind when creating copy that I want to get links for.

Who have I empowered or made feel important or have an emotional reaction?

Why would that person want to share, link to or call out my content by tagging a friend in it?

Did I provide a solution to a common or unique problem?

What is unique, special, or different about how I’m presenting this content?

Which ways have I better explained, detailed, or given examples of something complex, funny, or useful?

How have I enabled people to easily share and link to this content?

Where have I advertised it so that I can keep it in front of people who can give me quality backlinks and references (sometimes this is an influencer who has a large following of bloggers and journalists)?

When someone mentions natural links, it’s all about quality. That means they can’t be easily acquired, they’re in a good SEO neighborhood, and that they are in topically related content sites that match your services, stores, site, or niche.

Focusing on quality over quantity is what can help to protect your site as Google updates. More importantly, focusing on quality can help constantly bring in relevant readers through referring sites who may also become customers, engaged readers, and a new source of backlinks and social media traffic.

Original Article

The post What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink) appeared first on Tokay SEO.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8246812 https://www.tokayseo.com/seo/natural-link-good-backlink/

[joshuakhardy]

What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink)

With tradeshow season and Q4 coming up, terms like natural links, quality links, and good links are going to be thrown around like crazy.

Whether you’re going into a client pitch, attending a search marketing conference, or your boss asks you why you aren’t getting quality links, it’s important to know (and be able to explain) all the different types of links.

This post will help you to understand each type of link, provide you with definitions, and also help you determine which types of links may be able to help boost your rankings – and which you may want to add to a disavow sheet.

Although there is normally debate on specific types of links (.edu and relevant, manually-updated directories, for example), this will be a good baseline for you to use.

What is a Natural Backlink

Natural Link

A natural link is one that occurs organically (not easily seen as being placed by your company).

Natural links don’t:

Have tracking parameters.

Exist within sponsored or paid content.

Redirect through JavaScripts or monetization tools.

A natural link exists as a reference to a piece of content, website, or source.

Unnatural Link

These are paid for, can be placed and tracked by PR firms, media buyers or are being monetized through affiliate programs, CPC campaigns, influencers, or monetization scripts.

If they are do follow, then they can potentially lead to Google taking a manual action on your site or you could get hit by Penguin because they are not earned/natural.

What are unnatural links? Links:

With tracking parameters like UTM source and medium.

Within sponsored content on a site (since search engines do not know who paid for the content to be placed).

From sites using monetization scripts since some scripts say you get paid for linking to retailers.

You can find these in the site’s code, outbound redirects, and other mappable techniques.

Semi-natural Link

On occasion, you’ll discover a mixed link pattern. It is a natural link but uses tracking parameters for example.

If you click through from an influencer who has been paid to share a link.  That link will lead to the landing page that may have the tracking parameters in place.

Bloggers, aggregators, and others who follow that link may copy and paste it directly into their site giving natural links that also have these parameters. This could result in an unnatural but organic link scheme.

To help resolve this, make sure that as a person reaches your site through a tracked link, you set a redirect to pass the parameters but also resolve to the natural page structure. (i.e. the utm_campaign redirects to a version without any utm parameters).

Now you’ll have the standard and non-tracked URL as the one they use and be able to properly attribute sales, traffic, and leads back to the original site.

You can still measure the halo effect of additional links and exposure by pulling a link acquisition report and crawling/scraping the likes, shares, and retweets from the initial influencer.

What Are Quality Backlinks

Quality backlinks are links that come from high-quality sites.

This definition will change depending on the quality of the SEO you’re talking to, but for my agency and the ones I refer clients to, quality links come from quality sites that have at least most of this criteria:

The site is niche or at least has a regularly updated section about the topic.

There are no outbound links to adult, illegal, payday, or scam sites.

You won’t be able to see that they allow sponsored content (with the exception of clearly marked advertorials).

Media kits and publicly viewable advertising sections do not have a price for or mention of text links or backlinks.

Finding them in the Google news feed is a good sign that they are trustworthy or high quality in Google’s eyes.

Acquired links will be by staff writers and not contributors.  Contributors can be bought more easily and many large publications have begun nofollowing their links. Do a Google search for Huffington Post and NoFollow and you’ll see multiple discussions from when they flipped the switch.

They come from body copy that has to be earned.  That means no blog comments, forum mentions, press releases or other things which anyone can do or buy easily.

What Makes a Good Link

A good link is different than a quality link.  It can be any type of link that can have a positive impact with a bit less risk.

The factors of a good link vs. bad link can also change based on the type of SEO you’re doing (local vs. national and country specific vs. international – Russia and Yandex vs. the UK and Google).

A good link for Yandex should be ones that are approved by the Russian government and aren’t also linking to sites that have banned content, contraband, and things that are forbidden in Yandex. Alcohol gifts, for example, could potentially be bad for Yandex traffic, but good links for other countries and search engines.

Local directories that are managed, maintained, and don’t have a submit your site option may be good for local SEOs but probably not national because of the content relevance and potential quality.  If they have a lot of age and continuously clean out old sites, dead sites and 4XX errors they may be beneficial instead of harmful.

If you notice I’m saying may or might, it’s because there is no solid yes or no.  It depends on the specific situation and website.

You could have a blogger who has great niche content but no age or authority and may quit blogging in a year.  Although it looks like a good link, it would fall under “maybe” or “OK” for me.  That is 100 percent debatable.

Then there is an established blog without a huge following and sticks to its niche.  They are not doing well in Google though with organic even though they have great content.  This would fall under “OK” for me as well.

Another could be a new blog that is content relevant but doesn’t have a ton of SEO traffic but does have a lot of engaged readers.  This would be a good link for me because they have a quality audience and if they continue down the niche path they could be a great source of traffic/sales and also pass authority from their links for SEO.

The trick with good backlinks is to determine and watch how they impact you currently and what they may do in the future.  Each site is unique and each link should be considered independently before disavowing it as bad or keeping it as good/quality.

How Can You Build Quality Backlinks

You’ll find a ton of posts on Search Engine Journal about building quality links, including a few I’ve written. (Use the search box and you’ll find them.)

What works best for me is always keeping a few things in mind when creating copy that I want to get links for.

Who have I empowered or made feel important or have an emotional reaction?

Why would that person want to share, link to or call out my content by tagging a friend in it?

Did I provide a solution to a common or unique problem?

What is unique, special, or different about how I’m presenting this content?

Which ways have I better explained, detailed, or given examples of something complex, funny, or useful?

How have I enabled people to easily share and link to this content?

Where have I advertised it so that I can keep it in front of people who can give me quality backlinks and references (sometimes this is an influencer who has a large following of bloggers and journalists)?

When someone mentions natural links, it’s all about quality. That means they can’t be easily acquired, they’re in a good SEO neighborhood, and that they are in topically related content sites that match your services, stores, site, or niche.

Focusing on quality over quantity is what can help to protect your site as Google updates. More importantly, focusing on quality can help constantly bring in relevant readers through referring sites who may also become customers, engaged readers, and a new source of backlinks and social media traffic.

Original Article

The post What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink) appeared first on Tokay SEO.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8246812 https://www.tokayseo.com/seo/natural-link-good-backlink/

[lenakarley]

What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink)

With tradeshow season and Q4 coming up, terms like natural links, quality links, and good links are going to be thrown around like crazy.

Whether you’re going into a client pitch, attending a search marketing conference, or your boss asks you why you aren’t getting quality links, it’s important to know (and be able to explain) all the different types of links.

This post will help you to understand each type of link, provide you with definitions, and also help you determine which types of links may be able to help boost your rankings – and which you may want to add to a disavow sheet.

Although there is normally debate on specific types of links (.edu and relevant, manually-updated directories, for example), this will be a good baseline for you to use.

What is a Natural Backlink

Natural Link

A natural link is one that occurs organically (not easily seen as being placed by your company).

Natural links don’t:

Have tracking parameters.

Exist within sponsored or paid content.

Redirect through JavaScripts or monetization tools.

A natural link exists as a reference to a piece of content, website, or source.

Unnatural Link

These are paid for, can be placed and tracked by PR firms, media buyers or are being monetized through affiliate programs, CPC campaigns, influencers, or monetization scripts.

If they are do follow, then they can potentially lead to Google taking a manual action on your site or you could get hit by Penguin because they are not earned/natural.

What are unnatural links? Links:

With tracking parameters like UTM source and medium.

Within sponsored content on a site (since search engines do not know who paid for the content to be placed).

From sites using monetization scripts since some scripts say you get paid for linking to retailers.

You can find these in the site’s code, outbound redirects, and other mappable techniques.

Semi-natural Link

On occasion, you’ll discover a mixed link pattern. It is a natural link but uses tracking parameters for example.

If you click through from an influencer who has been paid to share a link.  That link will lead to the landing page that may have the tracking parameters in place.

Bloggers, aggregators, and others who follow that link may copy and paste it directly into their site giving natural links that also have these parameters. This could result in an unnatural but organic link scheme.

To help resolve this, make sure that as a person reaches your site through a tracked link, you set a redirect to pass the parameters but also resolve to the natural page structure. (i.e. the utm_campaign redirects to a version without any utm parameters).

Now you’ll have the standard and non-tracked URL as the one they use and be able to properly attribute sales, traffic, and leads back to the original site.

You can still measure the halo effect of additional links and exposure by pulling a link acquisition report and crawling/scraping the likes, shares, and retweets from the initial influencer.

What Are Quality Backlinks

Quality backlinks are links that come from high-quality sites.

This definition will change depending on the quality of the SEO you’re talking to, but for my agency and the ones I refer clients to, quality links come from quality sites that have at least most of this criteria:

The site is niche or at least has a regularly updated section about the topic.

There are no outbound links to adult, illegal, payday, or scam sites.

You won’t be able to see that they allow sponsored content (with the exception of clearly marked advertorials).

Media kits and publicly viewable advertising sections do not have a price for or mention of text links or backlinks.

Finding them in the Google news feed is a good sign that they are trustworthy or high quality in Google’s eyes.

Acquired links will be by staff writers and not contributors.  Contributors can be bought more easily and many large publications have begun nofollowing their links. Do a Google search for Huffington Post and NoFollow and you’ll see multiple discussions from when they flipped the switch.

They come from body copy that has to be earned.  That means no blog comments, forum mentions, press releases or other things which anyone can do or buy easily.

What Makes a Good Link

A good link is different than a quality link.  It can be any type of link that can have a positive impact with a bit less risk.

The factors of a good link vs. bad link can also change based on the type of SEO you’re doing (local vs. national and country specific vs. international – Russia and Yandex vs. the UK and Google).

A good link for Yandex should be ones that are approved by the Russian government and aren’t also linking to sites that have banned content, contraband, and things that are forbidden in Yandex. Alcohol gifts, for example, could potentially be bad for Yandex traffic, but good links for other countries and search engines.

Local directories that are managed, maintained, and don’t have a submit your site option may be good for local SEOs but probably not national because of the content relevance and potential quality.  If they have a lot of age and continuously clean out old sites, dead sites and 4XX errors they may be beneficial instead of harmful.

If you notice I’m saying may or might, it’s because there is no solid yes or no.  It depends on the specific situation and website.

You could have a blogger who has great niche content but no age or authority and may quit blogging in a year.  Although it looks like a good link, it would fall under “maybe” or “OK” for me.  That is 100 percent debatable.

Then there is an established blog without a huge following and sticks to its niche.  They are not doing well in Google though with organic even though they have great content.  This would fall under “OK” for me as well.

Another could be a new blog that is content relevant but doesn’t have a ton of SEO traffic but does have a lot of engaged readers.  This would be a good link for me because they have a quality audience and if they continue down the niche path they could be a great source of traffic/sales and also pass authority from their links for SEO.

The trick with good backlinks is to determine and watch how they impact you currently and what they may do in the future.  Each site is unique and each link should be considered independently before disavowing it as bad or keeping it as good/quality.

How Can You Build Quality Backlinks

You’ll find a ton of posts on Search Engine Journal about building quality links, including a few I’ve written. (Use the search box and you’ll find them.)

What works best for me is always keeping a few things in mind when creating copy that I want to get links for.

Who have I empowered or made feel important or have an emotional reaction?

Why would that person want to share, link to or call out my content by tagging a friend in it?

Did I provide a solution to a common or unique problem?

What is unique, special, or different about how I’m presenting this content?

Which ways have I better explained, detailed, or given examples of something complex, funny, or useful?

How have I enabled people to easily share and link to this content?

Where have I advertised it so that I can keep it in front of people who can give me quality backlinks and references (sometimes this is an influencer who has a large following of bloggers and journalists)?

When someone mentions natural links, it’s all about quality. That means they can’t be easily acquired, they’re in a good SEO neighborhood, and that they are in topically related content sites that match your services, stores, site, or niche.

Focusing on quality over quantity is what can help to protect your site as Google updates. More importantly, focusing on quality can help constantly bring in relevant readers through referring sites who may also become customers, engaged readers, and a new source of backlinks and social media traffic.

Original Article

The post What is a Natural Link? (A Good Backlink) appeared first on Tokay SEO.

from https://www.tokayseo.com/seo/natural-link-good-backlink/