#i’m a bisexual with a hatred towards men

[meganwinchester]

there’s just something about those long haired men…

[antyoneelse]

Trans Putty truther here so I’m gonna blabber on about how I think his life went up until the period we see in Moral Orel.

Born AFAB in the 1930’s, had inclinations towards masculine things from a young age. His parents weren’t exactly *abused,* that is, not like how Orel was corporally punished, or how Joe and Doughy were genuinely neglected physically and emotionally, but his parents were simply not emotionally present for most of his life. Being a kid during WW2, his father would have been drafted, leaving his mother (emotionally distant, short temper, but fulfilled her children’s physical needs at the time) as head of the household. Putty had his hair short, had aversions to dresses, took interests in more masculine things, and his mother was too apathetic to care. His sister got more care on account of being younger and more conventional. When his father came back, their family was pretty badly shaken at how he had changed. Putty flied under the radar for his entire childhood because his parents simply did not care (in the bad way) so long as he wasn’t openly queer or doing something illegal.

As a young adult he began to learn about queer spaces and identify as a butch lesbian in safer spaces. He went to University and didn’t cut contact with his parents, but didn’t humor his family much with interactions from him. His father died when he was 20, and this is the event that I think would really rock his world for two reasons: one, his interactions with his mother and sister would worsen under the stress, indirectly feeding his internal and external misogyny as he begins to identify as a male, and two he would further develop a deeper-seated fear towards war (in my cis headcanons, this is the catalyst towards him pursuing clergy— he is scared of going to war in the future and wants to avoid a draft at all costs). He resolves himself to not be like his father (at this point, not being a “weak” man, in the future this changes into not being emotionally distant to Stephanie like his parents were to him).

He formally begins his medical transition under the radar in the 60’s (he had been publicly identifying as a male before, let’s pretend we live in a world where he could have been consistently passing at this point) and moves to Moralton to begin God’s Favorite Protestant Church.

His mother dies while he is in his 30’s and his presence at her funeral is not taken well by his sister. They are officially cut off at this point. She has always been more successful than him and this has been a point of contention for years, and the combination of his bitterness and this event makes him kind of despise and ruminate over his family.

Until he moved to Moralton, he had not been focusing on romance as much as he could because of anxiety and internalized homophobia/transphobia. He begins to pursue women when he believes himself to be able to pass consistently but by this point he’s so awkward around women that any advance he makes does worse than the last (doesn’t help he developed his “flirting” style from misogynistic movies and men growing up, believing it would make him more manlier/fit in better). He becomes even more bitter towards the idea of women, because of his own hatred of himself, his bad experiences with his female family members, and now his failed attempts at romance. Good time to mention that he is a repressed bisexual: at this point, he believes that loving both/all sexes is impossible, and that liking men would make him less of a man (poor guy). He vehemently refuses anything that he sees is feminine because of his deep seated fear of being exposed or invalidated or feeling like he isn’t acting like he should.

So we get to the events of Moral Orel. Ginormous plot hole of how Stephanie came to be aside, when he meets her he sees so much of himself in her. How she talks about her mom, and what he saw himself of Gladys when she was alive, reminds him of his own mother and this helps him connect with Stephanie. I believe that over time as they connect and become family more Steph would help abate a lot of his internalized homophobia/transphobia/misogyny, even indirectly with just her presence and connection.

And he becomes friends with Agnes Sculptham the end roll credits (I’ve written too much).

[ephemerally-existing]

you’re probably just another ‘bisexual’ woman sexualizing masc women because you were hurt by too many men and masc women remind you of feminine men, which is what your type is. I’m so sick of us being hyper sexualized..We’re people too, we’re not just some experiment for you confused people

Your biphobia is really showing here, so imma keep it super duper simple for you.

1. You don’t know me.

2. You REALLY don’t know me.

3. Lastly, I love her.

That’s all, so maybe you can be less concerned about what I’m doing with my heart and more concerned as to why you seem to have all this animosity towards a whole part of the lgbtqia community (we’re the B, in case you didn’t know), and check yourself. I’ve often found that any sort of homophobia is just misdirected self hatred, so I hope you get some help and have a nice day. ✨

[mithliya]

What's your opinion on this as a lesbian https://www.tumblr.com/watermelinoe/723599331891019776/i-get-the-mistrust-i-see-how-homophobic-bi-people?source=share ?

i disagree ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ homophobia as a term acknowledges why bi people face for example higher rates of IPV in their opposite sex relationships, and at the end of the day we can see how the term biphobia is typically used. it’s often used to talk about interpersonal prejudices. the group that faces significantly higher rates of poverty are bisexual women, bisexual men face similar poverty rates to lesbians. when you look at mental health issues in bisexuals, it also relates to facing homophobia from one’s heterosexual partner:

i don’t think acknowledging bisexuals face a form of homophobia (not exactly the same as gay people but still homophobia nonetheless) somehow “cheapens homophobia”, frankly i think it shows that even if your relationships are socially accepted, homophobia can still impact your life because your relationship being accepted doesn’t mean you’re accepted within your relationship. it also often means that to get better treatment, you need to be closeted which, rejecting your same sex attraction isn’t good for anyone’s mental health.

at the end of the day biphobia has been, as a term, directly used to argue gay ppl oppress bi people and that bi people face stuff like the “double closet” and “double oppression”.. this is not something i imagined because i’m so mad at op and bisexuals for talking about their oppression, it’s something bisexuals & bisexual organisations have argued and pushed for. and i don’t see any reason why homophobia isn’t a good enough term to describe what bisexuals experience nor do i think it means they’re “functionally part-time homosexuals” because i don’t think you have to be homosexual to experience hatred towards u being same-sex attracted. so. i just disagree tbh

[pokeheros-drama]

Forgive me if the images aren’t on the post. They’re attached below as a redundancy. All I’m going to say is our newest social pariah needs a lesson in handling conflict. Cath here, the screenshots are mine as proof it’s me.

I love that you comment toxic misinformation on my feed, tell me my facts are opinions, and to “ha e a great day!” And then I’m blocked? With no preamble? I can see your feeds still. There are screenshots here on the drama blog. I don’t live under a rock: I know what you said. I’m just glad that their are other people to call you out too.

So Bretty: stop. Just shut up. Quit while you’re ahead. Your excuses don’t work on me. I come from a devout catholic family. I know the mixed messages from religion first-hand. I was raised on the fact that “boys can’t marry boys” was an unspoken principle, girls marry and serve their husbands. Many people in my life make you look like a rainbow warrior. It’s the type of thing that I don’t know how much of my family will react if I come out to them, so… I don’t. It’s my personal choice. I hear them make comments, and have to smile and nod, because I don’t know what they say. They intrude on my safe space and cite religion when they can.

But anonymously, online, I do everything I can to make sure people can have a safe space. I don’t need to take your fucking bigotedness. So here’s your bullshit, debunked.

1. Bisexuality is not just a Phase. This myth comes from people in the process of finding their sexuality that have a bisexual experience, even though they are not bisexual. It’s okay to experiment, as long as you set healthy expectations with your potential partner(s). In bisexuality, the physical and emotional attraction is more important than gender and, because of this, bisexuals choose to not limit themselves to either men or women.

2. Bisexual People are not just confused. As I stated before, preference is a thing. Some bisexuals choose to “lean straight,” meaning they generally prefer members of the opposite sex, while same-sex partners are still an options. Other bisexuals can “lean gay,” where they prefer members of the same sex but opposite gender relationships can still be an option. This is a matter of personal choice and has nothing to do with confusion.

3. There is no “right” or “wrong” way to be bisexual. Ohmygosh, you have bi friends in heterosexual relationships! “We have an understanding,” you said. “I’m fine with them,” you said. “I have no problem with bisexual people,” you said, with a caveat you didn’t even realize attached to the end. So are they doing it right and the rest of the LGBTQIA+ community is doing it wrong? People live their truth. It’s not your right to judge it.

Let’s define your viewpoints so you know the severity of your words. Homophobia, or heterosexism, is the assumption that people should be, or are, heterosexual. (Medical News Today) It is the fear, mistrust, hatred, or discomfort toward those who experience same-sex attraction. (Planned Parenthood). It can also take many different forms, ranging from the use of negative and offensive language, to more extreme forms, including bullying, abuse, and physical violence. A person may exhibit homophobic tendencies or thoughts due to their upbringing or conservative religious beliefs. That does not excuse said beliefs. Experiencing discrimination in any setting can have a huge impact on a person’s health.

Every website I have visited says something along the lines of “People can also speak out when they witness homophobia/heterosexism, for example, when a person makes an offensive joke or bullies others.”

Just try for five seconds to imagine a world where you’re wrong. Please. I haven’t even blocked you back yet if you want to talk. Message me. I’m still willing to hear you out. I’m willing to teach, provided you’re willing to listen.

As always, my palpad is open for all who take offense with my words. (Sorry blog owner, it’s another Cath essay!)

Images:https://ibb.co/JnPBGh7https://ibb.co/hHvD3Bqhttps://ibb.co/TwPrmxvhttps://ibb.co/47V6FMLhttps://ibb.co/wC7F71p

Sources:https://www.healthyplace.com/gender/bisexual/top-myths-about-bisexualityhttps://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/homophobiahttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-decisions/201405/3-myths-about-bisexuality-debunked-sciencehttps://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-things-lgbtq/201712/the-dangers-homophobia

Mod edit; For some reason, the links all go to the same thing. If you reblog this with the sources fixed, I’ll reblog it.

[doomalade]

As a firm believe in the need to learn and understand history in all aspects of life I cannot agree more with these posts.

Yes you can have understanding that in the past, a term such as “queer” was used in a negative and bigoted manner by those seeking to keep LGBT people oppressed.

Yes you can also know have an understanding that today queer is being claimed and reformed as something positive and an inclusive term by and for the LGBT community. Queer is our word. We are queer, that is who we are as a collective. Take pride in the accomplishment of stripping away a tool once used by those who wish we don’t exist and celebrate the newfound unity under this word.

Be understanding of history, and be progressive towards future progress.

I personally am very new (relatively speaking) to being LGBT. It’s only been like 3 years since I first accepted that I am bisexual. What I have noticed is both great strides in progress for acceptance and also a long road ahead to work out issues that affect queer people today.

My experience with radfems has not only been what I can only describe as hatred towards myself because I am male, but also rampant biphobia/bi erasure. Now when I mention biphobia and bi erasure that also includes panphobia and pan erasure. Because at the end of the day I have seen countless examples of bi/pan women being deemed “traitors” for being with a man, I’ve seen bi/pan men be called evil, greedy, and straight men in disguise trying to steal away women from lesbians, and I’ve seen bi/pan couples be called purely heterosexual just because they are in a man and woman relationship (het relationship).

I’m not even going to get started with TERFs, but the point I’m hoping to make is that step one to better things is understand and see the problem.

Hopefully with time of letting people know that their bigotry is not acceptable or exempt and slowly work towards continuing to build a more unity and accepting community.

So what I’ve learned from the past couple months of being really loud about being a bi woman on Tumblr is: A lot of young/new LGBT+ people on this site do not understand that some of the stuff they’re saying comes across to other LGBT+ people as offensive, aggressive, or threatening. And when they actually find out the history and context, a lot of them go, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I never meant to say that.”

Like, “queer is a slur”: I get the impression that people saying this are like… oh, how I might react if I heard someone refer to all gay men as “f*gs”. Like, “Oh wow, that’s a super loaded word with a bunch of negative freight behind it, are you really sure you want to put that word on people who are still very raw and would be alarmed, upset, or offended if they heard you call them it, no matter what you intended?”

So they’re really surprised when self-described queers respond with a LOT of hostility to what feels like a well-intentioned reminder that some people might not like it. 

That’s because there’s a history of “political lesbians”, like Sheila Jeffreys, who believe that no matter their sexual orientation, women should cut off all social contact with men, who are fundamentally evil, and only date the “correct” sex, which is other women. Political lesbians claim that relationships between women, especially ones that don’t contain lust, are fundamentally pure, good, and  unproblematic. They therefore regard most of the LGBT community with deep suspicion, because its members are either way too into sex, into the wrong kind of sex, into sex with men, are men themselves, or somehow challenge the very definitions of sex and gender. 

When “queer theory” arrived in the 1980s and 1990s as an organized attempt by many diverse LGBT+ people in academia to sit down and talk about the social oppressions they face, political lesbians like Jeffreys attacked it harshly, publishing articles like “The Queer Disappearance of Lesbians”, arguing that because queer theory said it was okay to be a man or stop being a man or want to have sex with a man, it was fundamentally evil and destructive. And this attitude has echoed through the years; many LGBT+ people have experience being harshly criticized by radical feminists because being anything but a cis “gold star lesbian” (another phrase that gives me war flashbacks) was considered patriarchal, oppressive, and basically evil.

And when those arguments happened, “queer” was a good umbrella to shelter under, even when people didn’t know the intricacies of academic queer theory; people who identified as “queer” were more likely to be accepting and understanding, and “queer” was often the only label or community bisexual and nonbinary people didn’t get chased out of. If someone didn’t disagree that people got to call themselves queer, but didn’t want to be called queer themselves, they could just say “I don’t like being called queer” and that was that. Being “queer” was to being LGBT as being a “feminist” was to being a woman; it was opt-in.

But this history isn’t evident when these interactions happen. We don’t sit down and say, “Okay, so forty years ago there was this woman named Sheila, and…” Instead we queers go POP! like pufferfish, instantly on the defensive, a red haze descending over our vision, and bellow, “DO NOT TELL ME WHAT WORDS I CANNOT USE,” because we cannot find a way to say, “This word is so vital and precious to me, I wouldn’t be alive in the same way if I lost it.” And then the people who just pointed out that this word has a history, JEEZ, way to overreact, go away very confused and off-put, because they were just trying to say.

But I’ve found that once this is explained, a lot of people go, “Oh wow, okay, I did NOT mean to insinuate that, I didn’t realize that I was also saying something with a lot of painful freight to it.”

And that? That gives me hope for the future.

[somecunt]

I’ve dissembled my lesbophobia, my misogyny, and my femmephobia.

I’ve carried a fear of being attracted to women, for a long time. I have a lot of anxiety surrounding attraction to women. Whenever I’d see a nude woman in a sexual context I’d become disgusted. This is partially due to it being very normalized for gay cis men to find women’s bodies, and objects associated with women’s bodies repulsive.

I’m working on it definitely. I didn’t value the relationships of wlw or wlnb/nblw or lesbians,sapphics and related attractions.

I used to have a, “not like other girls” mindset, yeah sure I’m ftm and I was in fact “not like other girls” but I leaned into misogyny heavily to distance myself for girls/women, and femininity in girls/women. some of my hatred of female bodies may also come from my need to not be in association with girls/women.

This could be misinterpreted for me as an trans male coming in to scold cis gay males for their “inherent attraction to male bodies and repugnance towards female bodies”, being a gay man isn’t synonymous with hating vaginas, breasts, and loving dick. I’m firmly attracted to nonwomen, and I like breasts, and vaginas, I like penis as well, but in terms of men I do have a preference toward vaginas, nonbinary people, no preference.

In the way I interpret sexuality, what I believe determines it is what are you thinking behind it. regardless of your partner if you’re intimate with them because you’re perceiving their body within womanhood, then you’re probably attracted to women, if you’re partner doesn’t perceive themselves that way, that’s an issue. there’s other things that affect this, like are you forcing yourself to perceive their body in some sort of way to prevent you from facing the reality that you’re one way. I think forcing, and widening your perspective is different.

We’ve been taught that penises, are male genitalia, they’re don’t have to be, they’re penises at their core, and they’re attached to many types of people, trans/cis men, fem/masc/neutral aligned people, trans/cis women. It’s understandable that you categorize penises as male because you were raised in a society where that’s the norm. Seeing more women and non-men with penises while genuinely recognizing them as women, and nonbinary can aid in expanding that view. You don’t need to sleep with anyone you don’t want to, but placing their body into a category of disgust is wrong.

Women’s bodies are beautiful, although I’m not attracted to them sexually, aesthetically all bodies carry their own intense beauty.

Some people don’t even weigh gender presentation, gender identity, or genitalia in their attraction to people, which I guess would be called pansexuality, although plenty of bisexual people also feel this way about their attraction. This doesn’t mean pansexual people can’t have these same issues of perceiving all bodies afab as women’s bodies, and all bodies amab as men’s bodies.

[marigoldwitch]

trigger warning: homophobic remarks

I’ve spent all morning reading comments and DMs on Twitter from people (mostly men) insulting me. I try to remain respectful and not engage in childish behavior towards them but it’s difficult when people are specifically targeting you.

I even had some man make one of those lists on Twitter (I honestly don’t know how it works but I’ll share a screenshot) where he targets just me and calls me a “dumb bird bitch.” Idk what that means, unless it’s a reference to the whole “this stupid bird app” thing. Idk.

Someone insinuated that I’m a gr**mer because I’m bisexual (or maybe because they think I’m a lesbian). Another person made fun of me because I’m neurodivergent. And another because I’m a witch.

Btw, this is what I said: *i’m sarahthevampyrslayer*

There’s even worse crap in that thread.

I just hope these people find some peace one day. I hope hatred doesn’t control them one day. I also hope they get out and experience real life, away from the internet. I hope they learn how to treat people with kindness and empathy.

[alrightsnaps]

This is probably weird to say but I am so thankful for your blog. As a bisexual woman with anger issues (which I’m getting help for!) it’s been tough going on social media recently because I can so easily imagine myself in a similar situation to Amber and this whole thing is like a massive reminder that if I ever came forward this is how they’d react because I’m not a “good victim”. The real slap in the face was seeing Amber’s bisexuality weaponised against when she allegedly had a threesome with Cara Delevingne and Elon Musk, as if that isn’t the oldest bi stereotype in the book, and people believed it. So to see a blog like yours, consistently defending her and providing sources no matter how horrible the depp stans get, makes me feel a little less lonely, and that if I came forward there might be someone who’d believe me. So yeah, sorry for dumping this on you but you should know the impact you have for people like me <3

So happy to have a bisexual woman in my inbox! sending the warmest wishes your way anon! 💖

This trial has been so tough to watch for so many women (especially DV victims). The public response and unhinged vitriol towards Amber Heard, the insane... I'm still trying to process the fact that this is really happening not 5 years after MeToo. My heart just goes to abused women every time I read all the comments demonizing a woman for using violence against her abuser, because the reactions to this trial have really shed a light on how little support victims will receive from their environment and ultimately encourage them to stay silent. I cannot stress this enough and idgaf about that asshole's stans flooding my inbox: abused women using reactive violence does NOT make them abusers nor does it make their abuser a victim. That's DARVO and it's straight out of an abuser's textbook. The fact that so many women are running with it and trying to turn Depp into some poster child of men abused by women is just disturbing. It makes me feel hopeless for the future because this trial will set a precedent both legally (Marilyn Manson has already filed a defamation lawsuit against Evan Rachel Wood so watch the public rip her to shreds as well in a while) and on a social level.

It solidifies the gaslighting abused women everywhere already suffer. The only good victim is the dead victim. And even then, their abuser will find a way to smear their name.

And the whole thing definitely hits harder if you're a bisexual woman given our demographic's increased risk of intimate partner abuse. The homophobic abuse Amber suffered by Depp during their relationship is sickening enough, seeing so many comments specifically targeting her because of her bisexuality (I've seen some similar comments about Evan Rachel Wood too) and trying to paint her as the abuser of the uwu pure powerful white man who talked about raping and burning her corpse? It makes me sick to my stomach.

I've legitimately never seen people treat actual Hollywood pedos and rapists with half the amount of demented hatred they're directing at Amber and that's a message to women everywhere. MRAs must be having the time of their lives.

[tressasinterlude]

𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐓 #𝟑: Female Public Figures Dating Men with Questionable Views That Contradict Their Image & Alleged Politics

𝗗𝗜𝗦𝗖𝗟𝗔𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗥: These rant blog posts are really just reflective of my thoughts at the time that I make them and are posted here because I need an outlet to release all of this shit I have going on my busy ass mind. That’s it and that’s all. Now let’s get into it..

This rant was greatly inspired by none other than Ms. Robyn Rihanna “Tell Your Faves To Pull Up [in regards to social injustices directly affecting black people]” Fenty and her openly colorist boyfriend, A$AP Rocky. Aside from the fact that Rihanna tends to slip under the radar and is never held accountable for her problematic ways due to her conventional beauty (i.e. Her heavy usage of anti-Asian slurs, particularly targeted towards Chris Brown’s ex gf, Karrueche), it’s very alarming that a woman who has an entire makeup brand with a campaign based around the inclusivity of ALL black women is publicly flaunting a beau who once said that DSBW do not look good with red lipstick.

And yes, I’m very much aware that Rakim said this tasteless comment over 8 years ago but from the looks of it, not much has really changed with him. Don’t @ me about it neither because I don’t care.

Also peep how he compares a hypothetical darkskinned woman to a man (Wesley Snipes) while trying to explain how his antiblackness isn’t wrong because he said something about white women as well. Gaslighting at its finest. Don’t you just love it! 😀

Furthermore, you would think that somebody of Rihanna’s level of stature would know not to associate themselves with someone as messy as A$AP Rocky but... Stupid is what stupid does, I guess! I can’t even begin to place the blame on him anymore because he’s revealed his true colors and we all have made the deliberate choice to either accept it or don’t and have discontinued all support for him. Unfortunately, misogynoir is never the dealbreaker for most people and the hatred for [dark-skinned] black women is so engrained in society that it’s frowned upon when we publicly speak out against it. Very ass backwards if you ask me but that’s society for you. Now, enough about that. Let’s focus back on Ms. Vita La Coco.

As a woman who claims to be a girl’s girl and is always presenting herself to be someone who is the epitome of a pro-black feminist bad ass, it just makes her alleged activism come off so disingenuous when she’s also laying down with the same man that actively attacks the demographic she’s supposed to be standing in solidarity with. It’s “Black Lives Matter” on the IG posts but your vagina is getting moist for a man who openly stated he doesn’t relate to what goes on in Ferguson because he lives in Soho & Beverly Hills. Ferguson being the exact place where a 17-year-old black boy’s lifeless corpse laid on the hot concrete for FOUR hours after he was murdered by a police officer. He couldn’t 'relate' to the fate of so many black men, women, and children who are murdered or seriously injured from state-sanctioned violence because they’re poor and he is not or so he thought.

But then again, what can I really expect from a woman who identified as being “biracial” until as recent as roughly 6 years ago? What can I really expect from a woman who called Rachel Dolezal a ‘hero’ for cosplaying as a black woman? I’d be lying if I said my expectations for her were high in this regard because sis has always shown us she was lacking in this department. And just for the record, this is not a personal attack on Rihanna at all for the die-hard Navy stans in the back. I admire her latest fashions and bop my head to her music just like the next person but she’s getting the side-eye from me on this one.

Trust and believe me though, she’s not the only woman who I can call out for being a hypocrite. Of course not! This stone can be cast at a few others. So without further ado, why don’t we bring Ms. Kehlani Parrish to the front of the congregation? Prior to Kehlani’s recent declaration of identifying as a lesbian, her last public relationship with a man was with YG. Yes, the same YG who felt it was necessary to say him & Nipsey had ‘pretty light-skinned’ daughters to raise in the middle of his deceased friend’s memorial. By the way, Nipsey’s daughter is not even light (or at least not in my book anyways.) She’s a very deep caramel tone just like her father which makes what he said even more moronic. Yes, the same YG who thought it was clever idea to use slavery as an aesthetic for a music video to a diss track about 6ix9ine. And yes, also the same YG who has derogatory lyrics targeted at bisexual women. Just to end up sweating the red carpets with one. I swear the jokes just continue to write themselves.

This raises the question once more; How high of a pedestal can I really put a multiracial woman who has a song titled ‘N*ggas’ and when received backlash for the song in question, she used the ultimate ‘I’m mixed’ copout while not having a visibly black parent in sight?

It’s also kind of suspicious to me that many were not privy to Kehlani’s secret romance with Victoria Monét (pictured bottom right) until Victoria did an interview with Gay Times revealing she fell in love with a girl but they subsequently broke up because Victoria had a boyfriend and that girl was pregnant in a polyamorous relationship. Fans began to speculate because both Victoria & Kehlani previously candidly spoke about their sexual orientations, Kehlani had just had Adeya and they both were seemingly close. Their short-lived fling would later be confirmed when Victoria released the song ‘Touch Me’ on her last project and Kehlani hopped on the remix. Meanwhile, Kehlani’s relationship with Shaina (pictured bottom left) was very overt and all over her Instagram feed from my recollection. And as you can see, Shaina looks absolutely nothing like Victoria. They look like the complete opposite of eachother in every aspect which is kind of alarming(?) to say the least because why is it that the women she proudly claims as her partners tend to have a very racially ambiguous look such as herself but her ‘sneaky links’ on the other hand are undoubtedly black women? Again, it could just be me jumping conclusions. You know, I’m kinda good for that however something tells me I’m not. Y’all be the judge of the material though.

Last but not least, I’d like to touch on Ms. Raven Tracy very briefly. I was very weary about even including in this segment and if I should just put her in a entirely separate blog post with other women who openly date abusers despite their checkered past (alongside Nicki Minaj & her r*pist murderer of a husband, India Love & Sheck Wes etc.) being this particular blog post was based around the theme of lightskinned/mixed women dating men with extremely problematic views about DSBW. Raven obviously isn’t lightskinned or mixed however I refused to ignore how contradictory her [former] relationship with an alleged (I used this word very loosely and mainly for legality purposes.) serial r*pist while promoting a brand that is all about feminism & body positivity. This also traces back to A$AP Rocky by default being that Ian Connor is his very close friend and he came to Connor’s defense when several women came forward detailing accounts of Connor allegedly s*xually assaulting them. (I wish I could place the actual video of what A$AP Rocky said verbatim but Tumblr only allows one video per blog post. 🙄)

Back in June of this year, Ian & Raven had a back & forth on Twitter after Ian tweeted about Raven “fucking everybody” behind his back. I can only assume that he was alluding to Tori Brixx posting a video of her ex, Rich the Kid & Raven kissing on her story. Disgusted is not even the word to describe my feeling when she admitted she stuck by Ian despite of his many allegations of s*xual abuse because she loved him and her being a empath causes her to want to help everybody. Imagine aiding and abetting a predator and even paying for his bail & legal fees just to turn around and expect sympathy because this same individual cheated on you and exploited you all over Twitter for the public to see. The same man that you would get back with not even a WEEK after the fact & turn off your IG comments because it isn’t our “business” after making it our business...

That being said, I just genuinely want to know: Why do these women completely go against what they stand for in regards to these men? Maybe it was never genuine from jump street and if that’s the case, why jump on the bandwagon of performative activism? Is it because it’s profitable right now? Is it because disrespecting black women is not an immediate death sentence to your careers and more often than not actually helps you advance even further? I guess that’s the billion dollar question that’ll never truly be answered. I just want the world to stop using black women as their stepping stool to get to where they need to go and then discarding of us when we’re no longer beneficial. Support us all the way or don’t support us at all. We deal with enough disrespect as is so we’d appreciate if y’all would stop straddling the fence and partake in your misogynoir out loud if that’s what you choose to do. We have no use for fake allyship and quite frankly, it’s doing more harm for us than good. Please and thank you!

Sincerely,

- 𝙼𝙸𝚂𝚂 𝙴𝙳𝙶𝙰𝚁 𝙰𝙻𝙻𝙴𝙽 𝙷𝙾𝙴. 💋

[lily-radiance]

Sangwoo x Female Police Reader: Masterlist

Summary:

Imagine what it’s like to grow close to a cold-hearted killer, a creature of the night who takes pleasure from pain. What happens when your childhood best friend and someone you know you love much more than friends becomes the maniac taunting Korea? What will happen when you go looking for an old acquaintance only to be met with dead ends? Will you work with the cop who may lock your friend away, or stay ignorant?

Trigger Warnings and other info: mentions of blood, gore, abuse, suicidal thoughts or tendencies, anxiety, depression, attempted sexual assault, questioning of sexuality discovery(I’ll say queer but leaning towards bisexual), afab reader, suggestive content like alluding to sex, light sexual encounters, mentions of alcohol, murder, mature language.

NO SMUT

- NO HATRED OR SHAMING WILL BE ALLOWED, IF I SEE IT I BLOCK IT

Chapter List:

Chapter 1 (Rough Detective by The Dead Weather)

The chase begins as the various detectives of the police station scan the clues presented. If only you weren’t one of the officers, maybe you could catch a break. After everything you’ve been through, being friends with a killer wasn’t on your itinerary.

You’re an unusual suspect now and may be right/The kind all men cannot recollect or forget at night/You’re the rough detective with the smokey eye/Where the person you are after is the other guy

Chapter 2(I’m Happy Just To Dance With You by The Beatles)

As long as you’re with him what do you have to worry about? Forget the monstrous boyfriend. Forget the coworker you slept with. Forget the missing friend. Forget the overbearing mother. Just remember his name and the memories attached to him, because the rest are insignificant.

Just to dance with you/Is everything I need/Before this dance is through/I think I’ll love you, too/I’m so happy when you dance with me

Chapter 3(Heads Will Roll by The Yeah Yeah Yeah’s)

Everyone is afraid of something, and that rings truest for the townspeople of Korea. Lock your doors, get your weapons ready, and prepare for the world to end.

The men cry out the girls cry out/The men cry out, oh no/Oh oh! Oh!/Oh oh! Oh!/Off, off with your head/Dance, dance til you’re dead (dead)/Heads will roll/Heads will roll/Heads will roll/On the floor

Chapter 4(I’m Not A Vampire by Falling In Reverse)

The exhaustion is almost too much to bear as the conversations get harder, but it’s the price you pay of being friends with a monster. After all the scariest monsters are the ones with human faces.

Well, I can lure any woman that I want to in my bed/With me/And whiskey seems to be my holy water/Mothers better lock your doors/And hide your daughters/I’m insane/Well, I can feel it in my bones/Coursing through my veins/When did I become so cold?

Chapter 5(Edelweiss by Richard Rogers from The Sound Of Music)

Even now his voice remains your calming beacon, singing you to bliss as you wait in that unfavorable hospital bed. If only you knew the horrors that left those vocal chords every other night….

Edelweiss, Edelweiss/Every morning you greet me/Small and white, clean and bright/You look happy to meet me/Blossom of snow, may you bloom and grow/Bloom and grow forever/Edelweiss, Edelweiss

Chapter 6(Keep Driving by Harry Styles)

When did ignorance become easier and honesty the toughest pill to swallow?

Maple syrup/Coffee, pancakes for two/Hash brown, egg yolk/I will always love you/A small concern with how the engine sounds/We held darkness in withheld clouds/I would ask, “Should we just keep driving?”/Should we just keep driving?/Passports in foot wells/Kiss her and don’t tell’s/Wine glass, puff pass/Tea with cyborgs/Riot America/Science and Edibles

Chapter 7: So Sad, So Sad by Varsity

Your partner at the station is beginning to realize she may not be what you’re looking for in a lover. But how could you deny her a chance and blatantly ignore all the good qualities she offers? Is your new infatuation really that big a deal? Maybe you’re just overlooking everything that deems him a threat?

So sad, so sad/I could never make you stay/Too bad, too bad/I could never walk away/So sad, so sad/I reply upon cliche/To help me explain/Why I will never be the same/Trying to be a perfect circle/Neat just like I take my drinks/A crumb upon my plate leads to a week of crying streaks/I could never walk away…/I could never make you stay

Chapter 8: Real by Lily Kincade ( WIP)

Yura has to confront you on this, had to know why you’re continuing to ignore her, to avoid her, to continue living in that godforsaken apartment. She’s lost in denial, unaware that as her misery grows, someone else’s pride expands.

I remember driving through the canyon with the windows down/Couldn’t help but smile when we were talking/I remember thinking now there’s no way out/My head was in the clouds yeah, I was falling/I remember calling my friends and telling them all about you/Thinking you could be the one thank god i found you but/Maybe you’re right we weren’t enough/And you can tell everyone you know you’re so glad it’s over/That you were never in deep enough to/Need closure, but don’t pretend you hated us/You can say that you don’t feel the way you used to feel/But don’t say it wasn’t real/Real love/Don’t say it wasn’t real

Chapter 9: Teeth by Lady Gaga (Suggestive!)(WIP)

The tension between you and him has grown past the breaking point. You need to prove once and for all that Yura is just a memory of the past, and prove to yourself that you are finally about to be with the guy you’ve chased for so long.

Don’t want no money (Want your money)/That shit’s ugly/Just want your sex (Want your sex)/Take a bite of my bad girl meat (Bad girl meat; take a bite of me)/Show me your teeth (Let me see your mean)/Got no direction (No direction; I need direction)/Just got my vamp (Got my vamp; uh-uh)/Take a bite of my bad girl meat (Bad girl meat; oh, take a bite of me, boy)/Show me your teeth (The truth is sexy)/ Tell me something that’ll change me/I’m gona love you with my hands tied/Show me your teeth (Just tell me when)/Show me your teeth (Open your mouth, boy)/Show me your teeth (Show me what you got)/Show me your teeth, your teeth, teeth, teeth.

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

what do you think about bi/pan/mspec lesbians and bi/pan/mspec lesbian exclusionists? i've been seeing them on twitter recently and i dont feel so good abt it (i mean the exclusionists ones)

I support mspec lesbians and they are 100% welcome on my blog.

Exclusionists? I don’t particularly like them tbh. Like mspec lesbian exclus can stay on my blog but you’re on thin fucking ice and if you start discourse I’ll block you and the only reason I’m saying this is because I know a lot of exclus who became inclusionists after being in more inclusive spaces.

Tbh I think the community has bigger issues than someone calling themselves a bisexual lesbian. Like if that’s a label they feel comfy with, okay, that’s awesome! Why am I supppsed to hate them? Now exclusionists why don’t we focus all that energy spent bullying people online towards accessible HRT?

I don’t know, I just. I don’t know. Like. 

What’s the use? 

What’s the use of directing all your vitriol and hatred towards queer people when the cishets are the ones making it harder for us to live as we are? Why shit on someone using the SAM when trans kids are being kicked out of their homes? 

Why hate someone using “contradictory” labels when gay kids are being sent to conversion therapy? Why bully someone for using the labels they feel fits best when HRT is being made more and more inaccessible? Why spend all your time on Twitter yelling at people for using labels you don’t like when kids are being told there’s something wrong with them and they should hide who they are?

I don’t know, mate. Like, the community’s being torn apart from the inside out when the thing we need to do right now is stick together, when we should support each other for our right to live as we are and marry and be happy, people online are screaming at each other for defining themselves in a way that isn’t palatable. 

So if a person wants to call themselves a pansexual lesbian, that’s awesome! I’ll support them all the way. Because other queer people aren’t the enemy. 

We’re just living as we are. 

It’s not the fault of other queer people that the world is the way it is, it’s the fault of transphobia and homophobia. Which is perpuated by cishets. Not other queer people.

It’s not the fault of a trans person that a cis person thinks everyone who’s gnc is trans, that’s the fault of cis people being cisnormative and enforcing gender roles. It’s not the fault of a bi lesbian that men think they’re entitled to lesbians, that’s just them being misogynistic and lesbophobic shitheads. 

Other queer people aren’t the enemy and the time we need to stick together the most isn’t the time we should be tearing each other down.

Anyways I sorta went on a whole rant because I hate exclusionists with a passion, especially for what they’ve done to our community. But yes, I 100% support mspec lesbians no matter their “contradictory” labels because they’re literally just using the labels that make them feel the most comfortable. As a bi man I’ll forever support my mspec lesbian sisters, y’all are welcome here.

don’t start discourse on this post, you will be blocked on sight. fuck off.

[headspace-hotel]

I went through the notes of the posts that have gotten the TERFs mad at me to do some systematic blocking and it was the most depressing experience in a couple months I need to play minecraft or smth to get my mind off all that.

like as ive said before I’ve gone through their tags and all the “resources” they send people to try to convert them or whatever and there are always the “nice” and “respectable” ones that make posts about how TERFs actually aren’t evil and really they’re just well-meaning people who empathize with trans people and just want to help them be less constrained by the construct of gender or whatever, and literally right next to those people, reblogging the same posts, posting in the same tags, are just the most abhorrently hate-filled people you’ve ever seen.

hating men and trans people is expected from them, but TERFs post about hating addicts, hating the mentally ill, hating bisexuals and asexuals and pansexuals, hating anyone who is slightly “weird” or a “nerd,” and hating women who disagree with them. They body-shame and mock the idea of ableism. They talk sometimes about having violent fantasies against the main objects of their hatred. As I read these blogs, I try to imagine the internal state of someone like this. I think many who are bigots compartmentalize, dehumanizing the people they hate, and separating themselves from their hatred, thinking of it as something different than hatred. But I see these people just...openly boiling with vitriol for every category of people they deem somehow aberrant or socially unfit, and I struggle to understand how their internal lives must work. I don’t know how you live that way. I can’t imagine having this kind of mental landscape and still maintaining an outward persona that’s possible to coexist with as a friend or family member.

And usually, these people have very calm pastel blog themes and post lots of pretty “aesthetic” photographs, and reply to messages from other “radfems” with this very sweet, supportive, nice tone, and it creates this kind of eerie poisonousness that makes you want to forget that this terrible side of the internet exists.

I’m just very struck by how all these blogs seem to have a much higher incidence of hateful attitudes toward a variety of people, regardless of their relevance to gender. I saw, for the first time today, someone arguing in the wild that audiobooks aren’t reading. In the tags they were mockingly referencing the idea of someone accusing them of “hating blind people.” No one calls out or criticizes such things in these communities. What a disturbing enclave.

[nebulaniggatry]

im sorry this is long, you can delete if you want, but i dont quite know where or how to ask this question and i figure this is a better bet than most wlw blogs on this site. but do any other bi women just feel SUPER unwelcome around a lot of lesbians lately???? this has happened to me in a couple different groups within the past few months, i start getting along great with a group of gay women, and then as soon as i mention im bi and not a lesbian its like they get disappointed and quietly try to shove me away. the energy just automatically changes. instead of everything being abt loving women, suddenly its all abt their hatred for men. plus, a week ago, i almost got kicked out of a group chat because someone accused me of being a "bi lesbian" (i dont even know how that would work or where they got that idea) and everyone freaked out and started saying i hate lesbians and want them to get r*ped by my boyfriend?? i did correct them and explain i dont even date men, but i ended up leaving the group anyway very soon after bc they didnt apologize or anything, they just stayed distant. i hope im just being dramatic, or getting unlucky, but has anyone else been dealing with this kinda stuff??? i get so much anxiety talking to other wlw now, and it hurts a lot. ive cried over it a couple times now so i guess im looking for some kind of support or advice.

Hey. You’re most likely not alone in that, but from my experience it definitely depends on the environment and where you’re meeting people. I’ve vented before on here that I’ve told a gay person, who previously thought I was gay, that I was bisexual, and I could physically see the light die from their eyes with disappointment lol. While I know generally for bisexuals we don’t go “:///“ when we encounter other gays or have them in our spaces, but are more or less happy we found another gay person to relate to. But that also could be because bisexuals don’t really have a grounded “community” by itself.

In general I prefer meeting lgbt people online in order to see their viewpoints first since its more open, but I can understand as well how that probably isn’t as enjoyable if you’re meaning to hang out. A lot of lgbt ppl I meet irl often hold strange grudges and misconceptions against another, whether that be biphobia, misogyny, transphobia, general bigotry, etc. So you’re definitely not alone.

Even now with on Twitter, recently this thread caught traction about bisexuals wanting their own spaces in NYC, and in the thread many bisexuals (bi women especially) have come forward about their mistreatment and alienation in gay bars. Which is, of course, met with biphobic statements like this:

My advice to you is to search for more inclusive spaces and groups, and also be blunt and combative towards people attempting to alienate you for being bisexual, even if that may be difficult. Gay people bullying other gay people stems from insecurity and unpacked self-hatred. There’s a reason why so many wlw target each other but worship the ground attractive cishet women walk on. It’s easier. Hope that helped you somewhat, and I’m sorry about what you’re going through 😞 💖💜💙

[silvershoe]

re: your last rb about bi women, i’ve recently come to terms that i’m bi after thinking i was a lesbian for the longest time simply because of all the internalized hatred/disgust at myself for liking men and at men in general to an extent (until i realized that lesbianism isn’t defined by hatred/disgust towards men but attraction towards women) but it’s still so hard for me to come to terms with it?? especially because whenever i tell someone i’m bi or make a comment about a guy i find attractive it’s always assumed that like. my attraction to women comes second to that of men’s and that men will always be my first choice, that women are just a convenient option if i’m ever “bored” or something like that. and while i do see myself more readily with a man (that may just be internalized homophobia, unfortunately, that i still have to relearn), the idea of being with a straight man who can’t understand the complicated relationship i have with my sexuality is enough to scare me away from any relationships. like it took me so long to get to this point so to have that all invalidated in the event of dating a guy… idk. sorry for basically venting in your inbox, i’m just glad someone understands how i feel ;;;

don't apologize!! i really do want to open up the floor for people going through similar shit to feel like they can talk about it on my little blog <3

i guess i went through a kind of similar thing, thought i was a lesbian for a while before coming to terms with my attraction to men. part of it was realizing the label felt constricting, and even though i couldn't really picture myself with a man at the time i was questioning myself (definitely a result of a similar feeling of disgust/hatred aimed at myself; it felt obvious to like women and afab people but less safe to like cis men), i knew i wasn't solely interested in women. part of what helped me in the questioning period was dropping labels as a whole. all i knew was that i was queer on some level but i didn't feel the need to specify what "kind" of queer. i was comfortable with this lack of labelling for most of high school, and even now i don't really feel the need to stick with one label. my identifying as bi feels very fluid and i'm not exactly attached to it, it feels more like an easy explanation when it comes up in certain contexts if that makes sense. i'm a firm believer in sexuality as an ever changing, fluid part of living, at least for myself. once i started thinking of my sexuality in this way i really think it alleviated a lot of the stress i associated with "choosing" a label, which feels very much like an external pressure to me.

unfortunately the assumption that men will always be the preferred choice isn't going to change. the best advice i can give you is to learn how to not give a shit and know yourself, understand that it's okay to be more attracted to men; that doesn't and will never invalidate your attraction to women. the people in your life who really want to understand you and care for your wellbeing won't put pressure on you to explain yourself.

i'm dating a cis guy right now as someone who identifies as both bisexual and genderqueer (tentatively, i feel similarly about labelling in application to gender). i've had to accept that he won't ever fully understand my relationship with my sexuality or my gender, and there are things i won't understand about his experiences either. that's just something that comes with relationships in general. you have to be comfortable knowing you won't understand things you don't have experience with, but you can be empathetic, and you can listen to them if they're willing to talk about it, and vice versa. i promise you there are men out there who are emotionally mature enough to understand this balance, which i really think is essential to maintaining a healthy relationship.

to respond to your fear of feeling invalidated by being with a cis guy - i get it. and i won't lie and say i haven't felt this way, because i have. and it's difficult because it's not because of anything my bf has said or done, it's purely a result of him existing as a cis man, and he can't change that lol. what's really helped me is realizing that my attraction to men as a bi person is a different experience than, for example, a straight woman's attraction to men. that differentiation is really comforting and validating for me, because it reminds me that i am queer, which is something to be proud of. and of course i am aware that i'm reaping the societal benefits of being in a straight-passing relationship, something that i try to keep in mind, and something that i think all straight-passing couples should be aware of. seriously, as someone who's only been in visibly queer relationships before this, it's a whole new world to exist in public spaces with you're s/o when he's a dude.

anyway, this was a lot longer than intended, but i hope i maybe spoke to some of what you mentioned. and i mean this in the kindest way possible; don't worry so much. take a breath. things will come with time, and you'll be okay. xoxo

[basilhearsanoise]

pleaseee elaborate on your homophobic sam take. it’s very compelling. i always thought sam’s early plotline with the demon blood was a queer allegory, but your explanation for his attitude towards dean’s bisexuality makes a lot of sense now that i think about it

WOW I'M A REAL SUPERNATURAL BLOG NOW YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THIS MADE MY DAY I WILL ABSOLUTELY ELABORATE THANK YOU

there are So Many Layers i probably won't even be able to get them all down but here's some major ones. from the get-go, sam is The Opposite of dean on so many issues, and essentially throughout the show they flip. this is most notably demonstrated by the fact that sam starts out as a Devout Christian (or at least we are to assume that he is christian given his approach to prayer, god, angels, etc) and by the end of the show sam is completely and utterly devoid of faith. whereas dean is like If There's A God In Heaven, What's He Waiting For? - Elton John.mp3 in the beginning of the show, and by the end he's like "i have faith in humanity, in spirituality, in CASTIEL, in MY SON JACK," by the end. but this is just one of the MANY issues they flip back and forth on, or just slowly and surely change their perspectives to be more like the way the other brother started.

1. should we tell people there are monsters? dean says "we can't tell anyone they exist the whole world will panic" vs. sam says "they have a RIGHT TO KNOW WHAT'S OUT THERE"

but also. are all monsters evil? dean says "yes, they kill innocent people and they killed my mother and destroyed my life, they ALL deserve to die" but sam says "SOME of them must be good....it's not THEIR FAULT they're disgusting, evil and eat people uwu"

monsters/cryptids/spirits/folklore etc have virtually always been, in some way shape or form, a queer allegory themselves. the shapeshifter arc spoke to me as a trans person on a deep personal level. dracula was essentially racist propaganda. so if we take this allegory to supernatural, and say, "acceptance of monsters = acceptance of queerness" dean's hatred of them is a hatred of himself, his own inner monster, his own internalized homophobia - in addition to the fact that because he IS a queer man who has been VICTIM to REAL VIOLENT homophobia before, it would make sense that he is #antifa #acab #kill all the nazis forever #don't waste time trying to make monsters good when you could save good people from them instead. which is like. a reasonable response to have to a group of people that systematically try to kill you. but that also makes sam's "oh pity the monster dean, don't kill it, FORGIVE, JUST GIVE THEM A CHANCE TO ~ REPENT ~ THEIR SINS" ....like, even in later seasons he is saying stuff like this, and while it's true that dean SHOULD forgive some of the monsters that sam says this about, it still reads to me as two major red flags of 1. forgive your abusers to be the better person and 2. "hate the sin, not the sinner" rhetoric. sam doesn't actually give a shit about any of these monsters he gives a shit about keeping his own ideological purity. he sounds like scary youth pastors i had as a child.

this is further demonstrated by the fact that as dean becomes more accepting of his sexuality as the show goes on, he becomes more accepting of monsters. that's benny's ENTIRE EXISTENCE AS A CHARACTER: "i accept this vampire because he is honorable, and manly, and looks really fuckin cute in suspenders." that's also why sam hates benny so much even though he's the one who's been like "but monsters can be good T__T" this whole time. what the fuck other reason would he have to hate benny so much?

this is also CLEARLY the ENTIRE subtext of the Demon Dean arc - Sam FLIPS OUT about him going off with crowley because he could FORGIVE one little crush on an angel, because of the fact that he's an angel, and also because dean wasn't "shoving his unholy lifestyle down everyone's throats" but demon dean is....loudly, angrily, gay. demon dean is a manifestation of all the gayness that dean has suppressed his whole life and now he's "too indecent" for sam. this is FURTHER demonstrated by the fact that crowley literally yells at dean to "pick a side" after demon dean sides with the slighted wife in a demon deal instead of the cheating husband, literally because of the fact that the husband says "men are just supposed to sleep around" and dean gets so mad about this sexism that he kills him.

this is dean not only rejecting sexism more than sam literally ever actually does in the show (everything he says about it reads to me as idle posturing Fake Woke Shit whereas dean is a sleazebag, but he's an Equal Opportunity sleazebag) but also his rejection of being pigeonholed as gay when he is, indeed, bisexual. crowley represents the biphobia that gay people enact on bi people, sam represents the homophobia that straight people enact on all queer people.

this brings me to the next part of sam's Not Niceness - he's like, actually 100% more misogynistic than dean is. i know i'm Not A Woman but like i am trans, queer, and not dumb. sam is a fucking sadist serial killer man who treats women like garbage the SECOND they are no longer useful to him, this is most clearly demonstrated when he doesn't have a "soul" but it existed in him basically from the get-go, he is painted as the "more emotionally mature one" but that reading became so inaccurate the show literally started making fun of his character for thinking that sappy fake shit could pass as sincere care for another human being. dean actually talks to women like they're people with feelings. he routinely identifies with the victims and is paralleled against them, especially if they are victims of childhood sexual assault. sam does not talk to women unless they serve some kind of purpose to his goals and is much more routinely depicted weirdly enjoying killing enemies that are women. sometimes not even for plot reasons, it's just weird shots that nobody thought to red flag because this show is. A MESS.

anyway. another example is the one that i mentioned in the post about the confederate soldier, the fact that sam is fucking racist and dean is at least, within the narrative, less racist.

ANYWAY, THERE'S STILL MORE I COULD TALK ABOUT BUT I'LL LEAVE IT AT THIS: sam is constantly telling dean that he's not being sensitive or poltically correct but every single time it comes off sounding like a straight person telling an actual gay person how not to be homophobic. like, please, sammy, touch grass. dean says: touch grass, kill nazis.