#i yap more in my personal but it wouldn't hurt to yap here

[dragonsoulage]

Fighting with his beloved nurse...

feat. Giyuu Tomioka

Giyuu is not used to people that like him and that are concerned for him. He does not even understand why you were angry when he got hurt a little too bad for your taste. Afraid he would need to split apart from his favourite nurse. So you two ended up arguing

Hello world I am still sick but I wrote a little Giyuu stuff here. Idk why I feel like he always would think he is not good enough, poor boy so we need to show him that he is precious ✨ anyways I still suck in proof reading but have fun. That's just the first time I wrote something for Demon Slayer 💖

Wordcount: 2,0 k

Warnings: fluff, fighting, a little suggestive in the end

The situation was kinda frustrating. He just came back from a mission a few days ago.

You were a nurse around from the butterfly estate. Stunning, gorgeous, breathtaking...all these words that popped in Giyuus head when you appeared in his sight. But not only that, you were indeed a kind soul. Always gifting him with the sweetest smiles of all when he returned.

Slowly over the years you build a connection with him. He was a cold man, not really social, so it was not that easy. But you were kind from the bottom of your heart. Not even could harm a fly.

Patients you card for all said the same, you were an angel walking on earth.

But even angels can be mad, right?

You and Giyuu, never really named what this was between you two.

All you knew was that when he came back from a mission, and you saw him, you came walking toward him in a quick pace. Hugging him so tight to make sure he was really there. And Giyuu? He always breathed in your scent. One hand on your face needing to look in the depth of your orbs to make sure, you were there and wouldn't leave, like everyone else.

He grew attached, more than that he loved you. He cared deeply, and yet saying it out loud felt so dangerous.

That poor boy was afraid you would slip away when he wasn't careful enough. Although you would never fade, for what reason?

He may be quiet, but he listened to you, he loved when you were yapping around. Or even the deep talk you two had sometimes in the middle of the night, when you slipped into his room after your late night shift was done.   

But right now? Oh, you were mad. And why? He did his job, as a Hashira eliminated a demon.

But when he had been coming back it was so close that he could've died, you were freaking out...because you were afraid. "Don't act like that would've been nothing. Look at you." you scolded him, as he stood in front of you. You looked everywhere except his eyes.

"I did my job, you are fully aware that I am a demon slayer, what is the trouble. That's not the first time I come back and not be unharmed." he asked, his voice sounded nonchalant.

He wasn't sure how to respond to your subtle anger, especially not when he was wounded.

Probably he didn't even understand the fact that you liked him so much, that you were actually worried. You sighted trying to make the bandage sit a little better.

"Are you mad?" he asked you then, he sat there shirtless as you personally took care of his wounds. Just a little more to the left and his wound would have been critical. You didn't just see Giyyu as a demon slayer or Hashira anymore. You were afraid that someday, he wouldn't come back. Furthermore, you never doubted his talent, but you were worried.

"Do I look happy?" you asked him back, shortly narrowing your eyes. Now he sighted, he thought he did something wrong. Disappointing? Fighting not hard enough? Being not good enough because he was harmed?

These were his thoughts, although it was quite the opposite.

"You don't." he replied curtly, with a heavy voice, his head was making scenarios.

"Right I am not, when that demon would have hit you just a little more left....you would have been dangerously wounded." you meant while you reached around his torso for the bandage. 

  "I endured worse things. I don't understand why you are making a fuss." probably this was not the answer you wanted to hear. Or that anyone want to hear. You loved him, cared so deep for him. It was not a fuss, at least not for you. You saw a lot of demon slayers die in your job, and you didn't want to have him on the list. You were done with the bandage and looked at him, sad eyes coupled with angry ones.

"A fuss? Is that what you think I do when you get back?" You asked him, your voice carried a hint of annoyance. Both of you kinda talking, not straight to the topic. You were worried, and he thought he was not good enough.

"(Y/N)...you patch me up. You come looking for me, I don't mean that you don't do your duty as nurse I..." Giyuu was lost for words. Well, what happened when he came back?

Yeah, it was you, you took your sweet time patching him up carefully. Listened to his dangerous adventure and after that? Showering him with praise and kisses, just to see how badly wounded he is and when it was not, that exhausting, you gifted him with passionate nights.

He grew accustomed to this routine, always wanting to be good for you. Not a lot of people liked him or took even interest in him. Not at all. He was just so afraid he would lose you, before he had the chance to acknowledge his feelings.

"We both know I do more than that...it's not what I meant." you said, and you were done patching him up at least as good as it could get now, because after this he stood up, ignored the pain in his ribs just to take his haori and put it on.

Giyuus face had a slight scowl in his brows, his black long ponytail just slightly disheveled from the journey back and the exhaustion. The bandage around his lower torso, his strong chest showing off even when the haori was already over his shoulders. He made his way to the door.

"I know that we...we are having a thing. That you do more than every other nurse in this estate would do. I just don't understand what is different now then before...." maybe he even mumbled that to himself. With a sigh he opened the door ready to go outside, he was not good dealing with arguments. Not that he couldn't say anything, but with you, it was different. He didn't want to say the wrong thing. He couldn't even bear the face you made. This was when it hit you, he was not going because he was angry too, he was going because he was afraid he fucked up and didn't even know why. Your steps then went fast over to him, and you grabbed the door with your hand before you stopped him from leaving. Gently closing it. "What do you think will happen when we fight, Tomioka?" you asked him, clearly a whole different topic than before. You looked a little strict but your features softer now.   

  Should he be honest? That he was simply afraid he did something truly wrong and lost you? Well, this was at least what he was thinking. Losing that pretty nurse, that made him feel...loved.

"We split, isn't it like that? Not that it would be a surprise." he spoke then, looking everywhere, but not in your face.

"Look at me, when you talk to me. I taught you manners." you meant, it was sounding a little sharp but with that edge...you were softer now. You saw what his problem had been, he didn't got the fact that you were concerned for him, afraid he could die. You liked him too...maybe even more than like. Then Giyuu looked up, poor boy, he was so distance and cold until he met you. He loved your warmth, the way you made him feel prickly in his chest. The way you smiled, the way you brushed strands of his raven hair out of his face. The way your waist felt in his hands, when he pulled you close. The way you smelled when he nuzzled his face in your neck.

"Giyuu..." you started and used his first name, your sweet voice filled with a little regret that you didn't see it that he was insecure, afraid to even.

"Just because I am mad don't mean we split... I am sorry when I made you feel unwanted. It was not-" before you could even finish, he stepped closer, his one hand reaching out cupping your cheek. It was even enough for him to hear that you don't split. You were his only person he wanted to have close now, where he allowed himself to be close.

"You didn't make me feel unwanted. It was just...the way you scolded me, making me...fear I did something that upset you so much you would change your mind about me." he said to you, his voice was now lower. "And I don't want to upset you. I just can't change the fact that fighting demons is my job, and apparently I am quite good at it." he added.

You laid your hand over his. It was a tender gesture. Nearly like all the tension flew away suddenly.   

  "I was just afraid... I don't want to lose you. You know? I see demon slayers die every day... I like you, you know. You don't complain about my yapping, the way you hold me close. I like all these things, and I was just concerned. Sorry that it overwhelm me and that I was being too hard to you." alone the fact that you apologized because you maybe reacted a little over in such a moment. The fact you spoke out you didn't want to lose him, that you liked him. Giyuu was anything than good at expressing his feelings. He pulled you just a little closer to give you such a loving kiss on your forehead. Before his forehead rested against yours. He took a deep breath.

"Actually (Y/N), I like you more than just...like. That is why I fear you wouldn't keep me around when I wasn't good enough." it was a little plain, not the passionate confessing others dreamed off. But it was his confession. The way he told you he loved you.

"You are a Hashira, you are one of the best, the best. My best." you answered him before you then reached out and placed a kiss on his lips. It was sweet at first, all the feeling you two had poured into this kiss. All at once. Then your hands slid up his bare chest. You felt his muscles tensing slightly, the way he shivered when your cold fingertips went over his skin. Before you laid your hands around the back of his neck.

"So we are going back to the usual routine when you patch me up?" he then asked, with flushed cheeks his one hand had grabbed gently your waist pulling you closer. He was still injured, and in pain, at least with certain movements. He just spoke in between the kiss, loving the way your lips felt against his.

"Depends on how much are you hurt?" you asked in between before gently guiding him back to the bed for patients. Where he sat down. Looking up at you with such ocean eyes. It was always so cute when he blushed because he was excited. "Not that much...you could be on top." He suggested with a tone kinda desperate for you. He would lie when he said he wouldn't love the fact that after you patched him up that you gave him such a delightful treatment. You guided him to lay down and straddled his lap, your cute nurse skirt rising up a little, and his hands went to the new exposed creamy skin he found. Rough hands caressing you. You then tilted your head just a little. Maybe one round he could take before he really should rest. "Oh, is that so? Not so much? Well while I will try to make you feel better, you can just continue to tell me how much you like me, that's a deal right?" Your voice was sweet when you said that, the whole argument forgotten, but of course not the fact that he admitted he liked you more than just a bit. And you would use this now to your advantage and gifting him with his beloved patching up routine...  

[jhonskii]

I keep forgetting I should talk here more sksksk

[leclarifies]

letters (MV33)

꒰ max verstappen x childhoodbestfriend! reader ꒱

synopsis┊it was confusing, even though you were continents apart, you never understood why max never responded to your letters, until you attend the belgium gp to finally get the answers you were looking for. inspired by the prompt, "why did you never reply to my letters?" "you wrote me letters?"

genre┊ fluffy, the fluffiest fluff i've ever fluffed.

word count┊ 4.4k

aria yaps┊ i have worked on this non-stop for two days, and i loved the way it turned out, maybe one of my favorite works. enjoy reading this as much as i enjoy writing this!!

SECOND PART

she was always around max, either from the sidelines or the first person max ran to when he won a race, it was always her. not even his father, even though he held his father to the highest regard, but it was always her.

the little wrinkles on the edge of her eyes when she smiled at him, the way her lips would curl up, or the way she would giggle every. single. time. that he would come and hug her after every race finish. he remembers it all. and the way he would snuggle his face in the crook of her neck and asked her softly after he would win a race, 'did you see me win, schatje?'

she would always smile back with a laugh, 'of course i did maxie.'

it was always about max, her life revolved around him, whether he liked it or not. she adored him and maybe he adored her a little bit more. they were childhood friends, they were inseparable since they were little babies, their mothers being friends made it even harder for the both of them to not be attached at the hip.

she loved being in his presence and he loved her.

the divorce between jos and sophie was hard on max, he blamed himself and his career but she was always there to tell him that it's not his fault. that their decision was their own and she never forgot to tell max that it wasn't his fault, no matter how much they told him that it was.

she saw the way jos had pushed max to his limits, get physical with his own son and his way of escaping that life was run to her arms, she was there tending to every bruise, every wound whether physical or emotional. she was his rock and it was final. nothing anyone could ever say or do would change his name.

"schatje," max had gently woken her up from her slumber, and she stirred awake from his soft voice, she noticed where she was and finally remembered what happened.

max had finished lower than expected and jos had thrown hurtful things about max, she was there on his mother's couch, comforting him and had fallen asleep that way, with max on her lap, "are you sleepy?"

she shook her head, not wanting to admit that yes, indeed she was sleepy, but if max needed comfort then that wasn't a big deal to her, "what's wrong maxie?"

"nothing, you can sleep on my bed if you're tired. i can sleep here," max had brushed a stray strand of her hair behind her ear but she refused, she hated taking his bed because she knew how uncomfortable the couch was, she wanted him to sleep well.

but he wouldn't allow her to take the couch, so they both slept on sophie's couch almost cuddled with eachother because they were both stubborn.

max was necessarily content with how he was living his life right now, but she made it better and that's all he could ask for. was it her smile? maybe her presence? max didn't care. the first memory he could remember from his early childhood was her, and it was etched into his memory like stone.

she was content with being max's rock, she was there to keep him grounded and she too only had memories of him from her early childhood. she wouldn't replace him for the world, he was too precious for anything in this earthly world.

but there was one day, it felt like a bomb dropped on her. her father had told her that he would have to move to korea to continue work, and she didn't know how to break the news to max until a few days before she had to leave.

she knew it was wrong to keep something this big away from max, but she was so stricken with anxiety that she never got the chance to until max came over to her house and saw all the packed boxes with their belongings.

"why didn't you tell me sooner?" max was angry, she could tell, by the way he was pacing around her room, looking at the packed boxes around. max thought he meant more to her than just a measly friend, he felt frustrated— betrayed almost. why wouldn't she tell him? why would she keep something as big as this away from him?

"why didn't you say something before? why now? why before you could see me race this weekend?" max was raising his voice now, and she didn't know what to do. her eyes turned glassy and those doe eyes max loved so much just looked so sad.

she stayed quiet, a guilty look on her face. she knew max would break from the news, and she knew that it would affect his performance, but she didn't know how to stay, how to convince her father that she didn't want to go, so yet again, she stayed silent in important moments of her life.

"schatje, can you say something? say anything?!" max yelled and she flinches, she didn't know what to say or what to do, she wanted to say something, say anything. but nothing would come to her lips. it was so hard for her when he was angry like this, it reminded her of his father and his father was deathly scary when angry.

a sigh escapes max's lips when he sees her flinch, coming close to her to wrap her in a hug. tears escaped from her eyes as she held onto max tight, "i didn't know how to tell you," she whispers into max's ear but max didn't say anything to that, just held her even tighter and he did not want to let go.

"it's okay schatje, i'm not mad at you. i could never get mad at you, i'm sorry for raising my voice. i just don't want you to go," tears started to escape max's eyes too, he didn't want to see her go. he wanted her to stay, and she did too. but the universe was pulling them apart and there was nothing either of them could do about it.

the ride to the airport was tough, being only fifteen and sixteen respectively. max held her hand the entire time, not wanting to let go, he didn't want her to leave, she was his biggest support system and he couldn't imagine her gone like that.

she was the most scared of the two of them, what if her father never returned to belgium? what if she was stuck there in korea forever? what if she never got to see his pretty blue eyes anymore?

max was the one to ground her, no longer lost in her thoughts, "can you promise me we'll keep in touch? or maybe visit from time to time?" max was holding onto her hands tightly, she felt like they would bruise, she could only smile and nod.

her mother had called her over, it was time to go. she looked at max for what it felt like the last time and left her life in belgium.

dear schatje,

hi, this is the first week that you're gone and it's bene been so hard without you here with me. i forgot that you weren't here anymore and i was expecting to see your face, but when i didn't, i may or may not have almost cried.

i miss you so much. tell me how it is in korea, is it cold? do they have bears there? what about the food? is it good? can you eat it? i heard there's a lot of spiy spicy food there? honestly i don't care about what they have there, i just care about you.

when can you visit again? can you tell me if you're ever coming back? i'm so worried about you there, i miss you... so much schatje.

written with a lot of love, your maxie.

max always handed off his letters to his father, telling his father to hand it off to his mother because apparently they kept in contact and wanted to send it off to the post office on behalf of him.

he just wondered how she was doing there.

it's been months and countless of letters max had sent, and none of them replied. he was starting to lose hope, he didn't want to think that his best friend would forget about him so easily like that, but he held out hope. he knew that she wouldn't magically forget about him now that she was there.

jealousy bubbled within him when he realized that she would be meeting new people, what if she met someone like him? who enjoyed karting and wanted to steal her attention?

no, he couldn't be thinking like that. he loved her and he knew she loved him as much as he did, so he told himself to just be patient, maybe letters to korea took months to reach?

the naviety was almost laughable but he was fine with it. he just wanted to hear back from his pretty girl.

"i do not understand why you keep writing letters to that stupid girl, she doesn't reply to you and all it does is distract you," jos had reprimanded his son, but max was stubborn. he didn't care what his father had to say, he loved all of her, even when she was thousands of kilometers away. he wanted to talk, even when she never replied.

max was in the process of writing another letter, but he never listened to his father, not about her. not about how much of a distraction she's been to his career, he didn't care. he used it as motivation to get better on the track, so the next time she saw him, he would be a world champion, that's what he silently promised to her.

it had been two years, and he hadn't heard a peep back. slowly, he was starting to lose hope but he couldn't lose hope, every single time he would send off the letters, he told himself that maybe it got lost in the mail.

max kept writing though.

max's debut in f1 was explosive to say the least, his interviews would absolutely go viral by the things he was saying in them. he didn't understand why, he just said what was on his mind.

what was truly on his mind was her.

was he not good enough for her? was him being in f1 not enough to impress her? why wouldn't she write back?

oh god how he missed her.

he still wrote to her weekly, it was religious at this point. he never forgot and he always told his father to send them off to his mother and the week after that was always disappointment because he wouldn't hear anything back.

little did he know, she never received those letters.

max had slowly stopped writing letters as he got into f1, he didn't see a point in it anymore. she never replied. she didn't care. letters didn't take years to reach korea, and he finally lost hope.

winning his first championship felt empty, the pretty girl who used to be waiting for him wasn't there for him anymore. of course, he was happy to win such an impressive feat, who wouldn't? but it just... lacked her.

max indeed lost hope that she would ever write back, but never lost hope that she was out there, somewhere, watching him race every single week and beat the shit out of his rivals. she loved watching him race and that's what he intended to do until the day he died, he wanted to impress her, maybe that was his ulterior motive to becoming a formula one driver.

all just to impress his best friend who had lost contact with him for a decade now.

"you need to stop figdeting so much," her mother had scolded her, she could only laugh nervously and stop fidgeting around. she wondered why max never wrote back to her, she had written him letters. did he hate her for moving out to korea and not coming to visit belgium?

she shook the thoughts out of her head, she was here now. for his home race, and for the rest of her life. her father had now decided to move back to belgium, because and i quote, 'i don't want my daughter to lose touch with her culture'.

she was 26 now, and she had guessed that he turned 27 not too long ago. it's been so long since she talked to him and she hoped that the spark that she had been yearning for had not been lost to the passages of time.

getting the paddock passes was not easy, it was a war and a half but she managed to snag some for herself and a friend that wanted to visit belgium and would arrive later on in the week.

"how did you even manage to get paddock passes for us?" heejin, her friend that wanted to visit had asked, she could only laugh and explain how she got them, it was a war and a half. heejin laughed along with her as they both arrived and scanned their passes at the entrance.

"i'm gonna meet my best friend here— well it's complicated. i don't think he considers me a best friend anymore, but i still do," she had softly told heejin who was a big formula one fan even before meeting her, heejin raised her eyebrow when she said that.

the both of them were walking down the paddock, passing all of the different team's hospitalities. heejin raised her eyebrow at her friend, who shrugged.

"who's your best friend?" heejin had asked as they pass by the red bull hospitality, she stopped which signalled heejin to stop as well, she looked at the redbull in awe. she hadn't been to a formula one race yet, the closest she'd been was to karting but that didn't bring on the feelings she felt when standing in front of this red bull building.

"well, he's driving the number one car."

"YOUR BEST FRIEND IS MAX VERSTAPPEN?!"

"YOUR BEST FRIEND IS MAX VERSTAPPEN?!"

max had heard a girl yell, he slowly turned his head. he was confused, he didn't have a best friend— well not anymore. she had moved to korea, all memories of her stuck in his head being replayed all over and over again.

that's all he had left of her.

the other girl shushed the girl who yelled, and that's when it dawned on max. the other girl looked awfully familiar, he couldn't quite place why she looked so familiar but she looked like her, like his best friend.

"shh! you can't just yell that out in public," she clamped a hand on her friend's mouth, "they're gonna think i'm insane!" then the both of them giggled, it did sound ridiculous but now he was curious.

was she back? was that her? who was she with? is that her new best friend? is that her?

as they both walked away, max wanted to run up to them, to ask that one particular girl what her name was. what she was doing here and who she was with but all of that died when he got approached by his race engineer.

then he forgot all about that familiar girl that he saw in front of the red bull hospitality.

max would only get another glimpse of her when it was race day, they were walking through the paddock in a similar fashion, but max promised to himself that he would approach them, that he would ask but there was doubt in his heart.

what if she forgot about him?

she couldn't, right?

and so approach them he did, tapping the girl that he felt was so familiar to on the shoulder, she had turned around and they had locked eyes.

it was as if she never left.

the sparks, they all came rushing back and then his heart started beating out of his chest, he wanted to ask so many questions, why she was here, who she was with, when she came back— why she came back, why she never wrote him back.

but the only thing that left his lips were a simple, "hi."

heejin was freaking out, she could tell. she knew that heejin was a big red bull fan too, always talking about how the team was dominating and they had the better car. she had heard all about it. but the little dutchboy she left all those years ago was standing in front of her and not-so little anymore and all those thoughts about her girlfriend was forgotten.

he looked the same, but grown and decked out in red bull merch. she wanted to laugh at how innocent he looked when he tapped her on the shoulder to get her to turn around, he looked stupid, stupidly cute.

all of those feelings from when she was back in belgium came back, she almost forgot what it felt like to be around max— her max. he looked like he was going to cry when he got a good look at her, that he finally realized that yes, it's her. the one that left him in belgium all those years ago.

and maybe she could cry too.

"maxie?" a familiar nickname slipped from her lips and she didn't get a response back, but a bear hug in return.

god, her scent. it was everything to him. he fucking missed it— miss her.

"i thought... i thought you forgot about me," max buried his face into the crook of her neck, she too wrapped her arms around max and buried her face into his chest. his voice was so vulnerable, all she wanted to do was curl around him and tell him that she would never.

she shook her head as she sank into the hug, "i could never forget my maxie," she mumbled into his chest, he held onto her tighter. he never wanted to let go, not now, not ever. she was where she was finally supposed to be, right in his arms.

once they got time alone after his race, max had stolen her away from her friend and dragged her into his driver's room, locking the door and pushing her against the wall, slamming his lips onto hers. he had been dreaming about this for so long, his lips on hers.

he didn't want to so sexual with her, no not yet. being in the small driver's room where they couldn't be free out of the public eye wasn't a good place. he just wanted to touch her, hold her, love her, make sure that she knew how much he had missed this.

missed them being together.

her hands instinctively went up to hold onto his shoulders, holding on for dear life as he kissed her softly. the feelings going through him were a mix of nostalgia, longing and love. he loved her for so long and it was so like her to show up when it mattered the most.

he won it for her today, to show her, that the little max she knew still had it in him to win and to impress her even with a world championship under his belt.

she felt the softness and the gentleness that max was touching her with, she knew how much he loved her. how much he care, how much he longed for her touch and she did too, only so much more.

she had so many questions in her, on why he never replied to the letters she sent or why he never sent any himself, not knowing what happened with her letters and why they never arrived properly.

but she didn't care at the moment, all she cared about was that she was safely in his arms, never to be let go ever again.

safe to say, her lips were to the point of bruising that night. max had forbade her to go back home, or to be away from his sight. he had kissed her silly, not wanting to let her go and there she was, settled nicely in his arms.

it's not like she wanted to go anywhere anyway.

the movie in the background was long forgotten, max's lips felt like they were molded for hers. he had waited for her for so long, waited to feel her skin after so long and this just felt right, it felt right when he was with her.

"maxie— mmhh— my love, stop," she had to talk in between kisses, max didn't want to let her go, his fingers were basically imprinted onto her waist. she was straddling max as he sat upright and kissed her, so softly. like she would break if he was any harder, even though he absolutely did want to kiss her harder.

max released her from the kiss with a pout, his pretty lips were red and swollen from all the kissing they did. everything in the world just seemed to fade into the background when they were together, like everyone else in this world was so insignificant for their time and they were the only people worthy of each other's time.

"but why? i wanna kiss you, i miss you. i have waited for you for ten years, the least you can do is let me kiss you until you're sick of me," max mumbled against her lips and all she could do was giggle.

god, her laugh, he loved it.

she shook her head and left a final peck on his lips, "because i want to talk maxie, we can't just kiss whatever questions we have for eachother away," she told him but he seemed to think otherwise, she had moved back to put a bit of distance in between them, to make sure max didn't go in to kiss her again.

"oh yes we can, i don't care about the questions, schatje. i just wanna be with you, just like old days, but now it's so different because in those ten years without you, i finally realized what i felt and how i felt for you and i can't wait any damn longer to finally kiss those pretty lips of yours, so please. just let me do this for another three hours and we can talk," max begged as he pulled her closer.

she couldn't imagine kissing for another three hours as they spent the last hour doing it, but with him? she would do it for another life-time if she could.

the both of them later had the serious talk when they were done kissing each other, now wanting answers from eachother. their legs were tangled and intertwined with each other's, not wanting to let go from their skin to skin contact.

"first off, why did you never reply to my letters? i wrote you so many. so many that i lost count, i would always write to you but you never replied, why?" max's voice came out strained, all of the painful feelings from the last ten years of his life were coming out, her doe eyes looked up from where she was, laying against his chest.

"you wrote me letters? i wrote you letters, you never replied. i thought you got too busy with your karting career to reply—"

"i could never get too busy to reply to you, but i never got any of your letters, schatje," max murmured against her forehead, kissing it gently after he spoke. she hummed a response before it dawned on her, she had always sent the letters to his father's address and she knew that his father wasn't fond of her, even offering her a huge lump sum of cash just for her to stay away from his son but she never accepted it, always choosing to be beside max, no matter what happened.

she looked up and sighed, she knew what happened now, she connected the pieces, "did you send your letters off to your dad?" she asked, and max nodded before it dawned on him too.

"that fucker hid the letters from you and never sent mine..."

she could only nod sadly, but it didn't matter now. all that mattered was that they were reconnected now.

scattered around them were the countless of letters max had written to her and all of the letters from her that he never received, the years of pining, longing— all of them tucked neatly away into these little envelopes that held all of those unsaid feelings.

a soft sigh escapes her lips, she looked at all of them, there were hundreds maybe. all of them posted to where she stayed in korea but never sent, always kept in a big box where all of his letters were and hers were stuffed in there in a similar fashion.

her heart clenched when she saw how many there were, there were far more many than whatever she sent, even though she did send quite a big sum.

when max had found out, he stormed into jos' house and demanded to ask why he never sent out the letters that he wrote and a big fight broke out, she had to hold of max from physically harming his own father. then they left after given the big box filled with letters.

"there's so many..." she watched in awe as all of them were sorted by date, from the latest to the earliest, max looked up at her with those big blue icy eyes of his, he looked really sad. stuck in his feelings almost, not understand why his father would do whatever he did in the past.

max held her hand gently, pulling her into his embrace, "i have always loved you, even when i was a little kid. i just didn't understand what those feelings were, i just acted on how i felt and being away from you... i just couldn't. so i sent you my love in the form of these letters."

she left a lingering kiss on his cheek, she felt sorry for having to leave all those years ago. she should've fought, should've stood her ground on how much she wanted to stay but she was just a 16 year old kid who didn't know how to, "i know. i'm sorry i had to leave all those years ago."

"don't apologize, schatje. i have never blamed you for leaving me. i have always held love for you in my heart, even if you didn't know it."

"i always knew max, and i still do."

very willing to do a part 2 to this btw, will only do it when requested tho. not proofread, excuse grammar mistakes.

[in-class-daydreams]

Imagine ex-husband Gojo doing things for his new love interests that you begged him for while you were married.

After a joint meeting between the sister schools, you overheard Suguru asking him who he was texting during the meeting.

Satoru replied, "Just letting my date know I'll be a bit late tonight since we ran long here. Todo can yap, huh?"

"Seriously!" Their voices faded as they walked down the hall.

You stood just outside the meeting room watching the corner the disappeared around. If you had to pinpoint the number one reason your marriage failed - more than clan pressure, more than the strain of being young parents, more than back to back to back missions - it would be the fact that Satoru can't communicate for shit.

Part of it wasn't his fault. His brain just didn't work like that. An inconvenient side effect of limitless is that everything makes sense in your head, but it's hard for a person with the gift to explain their thoughts to others.

So the no-call, no-shows to dinners was technically a side effect of limitless, as was his inability to articulate his feelings like an adult or the fact that he would just do things without even telling you there was a problem in the first place.

"Quit doing that with your face, brat." Sukuna emerges from the meeting room. He's out of his Ryomen form at the moment, as he usually is during meetings so that he can actually fit in his chair. "How long are you gonna let what he does affect you?"

"It doesn't!" you insist.

Sukuna rolls his eyes. "If that helps you sleep at night."

Imagine reminding yourself that you can't be mad at him.

You're seeing other people now, too. Hell, you've been divorced for over a decade, it's insanity that you care at all.

It's just. You never doubted his love for you. Not for a second, not even now that your marriage failed and you largely raised your son on your own.

"Mom?"

Maybe your divorce was his motivation to be better. You're not sure. But if he's capable of change, capable of being attentive and communicative, why couldn't he change for you all those years ago?

"Mom."

Could it be that you were his childhood companion and he loved you, but he was never in love with you? Was his love for you less than your love for him?

You hardly notice your son calling out to you until he springs into action. "Mom!" Sen nudges you away from the stove to turn of the burner. When did smoke fill the kitchen? The roux you were trying to make was burnt to a crisp, stuck to the pan and emanating an unpleasant smell.

Sen gently pries your hands off the handle and drops the ruined pan in the sink to soak. Then he makes sure the burner's off before turning to you with a conflicted expression.

He may have inherited a hybrid of both your and Satoru's personal brands of emotional stuntedness, but he could put two and two together between how distracted you've been and the rumors of Satoru dating again - What with it being huge news among jujutsu society (aka power hungry clans with eligible daughters.) Your son had his own complicated feelings regarding his father and as much as he'd prefer Satoru stay away from you, it hurt him to see you like this.

Though, watching you try to keep a stiff upper lip for his sake during the divorce is the reason he doesn't want his father anywhere near you.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." You wipe your hands on a dish towel. "I wasn't paying attention. Hang tight while I make you something else."

He could kill Satoru right now. But you wouldn't like that, so he won't.

"Mama, I--" He shuts his mouth. You've been protecting him from the details of the divorce his whole life. What did he know about comforting you? But while he may not have been able to protect you then, he can sure as hell try now.

"Mama, why don't I take you out to dinner? My treat."

Imagine that Sen decides he needs to stop having ideas.

He brought you to a local okonomiyaki that you've been going to since he was little to the point where the owners knew you well and liked to give you little extras from the kitchen. Today's treat was a side of pickled radish.

It was your happy little hideaway. Away from jujutsu and clans and curses and your broken home.

Sen insisted on cooking the okonomiyaki for you, saying that, "My treats means I'll take care of everything!" The weak smile you gave him made his heart soar.

You giggle while he jokes around and tells you about school like how Hikari fell asleep for 45 minutes out of an hour long test and still got a better score than him. Hearing about your son and his happy school days always made you feel better.

Sen was ready to give himself a pat on the back for cheering you up when he hears the front bell jungle and a woman's laughter carries over.

"Fancy places are like that, though!" the woman laughs. "They give a bite of food per plate."

Then a familiar voice replies, "Yeah, but it was good, wasn't it? And now we get to fill up at a cute place like this."

Even though he's the one facing the door and not you, the look on your face tells Sen all he needs to know. What breaks his heart is that you've sunk lower into your seat to make yourself smaller.

Sen could kill his father right now.

Hooray, angst!

Click [here] to keep up with ex-husband Gojo and his estranged family | Ask stuff about Sen and the fam [here]

[shelbgrey]

Hi! Could I request some Alex Karev smut? If possible? :)

Dr. Feelgood(Alex Karev)

Paring: Alex Karev x Fem!Reader

Summary: after being forced to plan a 'prom' at the hospital for Webber's niece, Alex and the reader decided to go together. They had nothing better to do, but their desire can't go unnoticed.

Warrings: SMUT, oral(female receiving), unprotected sex, pull-out method, sorta public sex?

MasterList ML2

“Everyone goes to the prom!” Webber shouts. “Everybody!”

And that's when we become party planners instead of surgeons, well we became that after the LVAD wire cutting incident, but that's not the point.

And when you have someone like me who never went to prom and someone like Alex who couldn't give a shit to help plane, nothing could get done quick enough.

Camille's friends just wouldn't shut up. Alex groaned and put his head on the table. The girls continued to ramble about colors and lights and Alex groaned louder like they were stabbing him.

“we could go all white” one the girls said, but then stopped when Alex made more noise of anguish.

“are you having a Seizure?” I asked, more annoyed with his groaning than the teenagers yapping.

“Will it get me out of here?” Alex asked, setting up. “Fine. Let's go with seizure”

Then after a while George got Bailey to help. She got every decoration down to a Tee and got everything ordered. I just didn't want to deal with this lovey-dovey crap. I just broke up with Derek Shepherd because I found out he was actually married, everything was just getting to me. Even a dying guy like Denny proposed to Izzie.

I could tell Alex had had enough of everything too. He blamed Izzie for our intern group's suspension and put on decoration duty, he was just pissed. I couldn't blame him, others might but I always saw a side of him no one else was. To be honest he was my person as Meredith would say… even if he looks ready to punch someone.

I let go of an unclosed balloon full of helium, making it fly towards Alex as it deflates. “Are you serious?!” He grabs the balloon. He was very agitated.

“Calm down, I'm just messing with ya” I told Alex.

“No! Don’t mess with me, have you seen these girls? These decorations! And now this!?”

I shrugged, already accepting our fate. I looked around as the hospital slowly turned into some prom nightmare. My high school prom was hell… If I had one, guy asked me and I ever really got the full experience.

“I really don’t want to be here. I can’t believe Webber forced us to do this because LVAD shit” Alex complained.

“No one wants to do this, but it's for the chief's niece” I said gently.

“Yeah, I know, but he forced the whole hospital staff to attend is stupid as hell”

I shrugged. I didn't really care about most things these last few months because of the Derek and Addison crap. I don't know what possessed me but it turned towards Alex. “you wanna go together tonight? need to be around friends” I don't know how I felt about Derek, but I wasn't ready to see him at his damn prom with Addison.

Alex turned to me, surprised. Like he hadn't expected me to say that. He thought about it for a moment and shrugged “Sure, why not?” he said with a smirk.

“Great,” I smiled.

--------(3rd pov)--------

The prom went off without a hitch. Y/n looked up at all the lights and decorations as her and Alex slowly swayed to the music.

“I can't believe I'm saying this, but this is nice” Alex said softly as his hands stayed on her hips, moving to the music. He was enjoying every second of this, all because of her. And he felt like he was getting back at Derek for hurting her. He felt good just being with her, seeing her in a beautiful dress instead of those blue scrubs. Even the decorations weren't pissing him off anymore, just being there with her ment everything.

“Yeah…” I looked away from Alex to look at everything around us, all the lights and colors.

“what's up?” Alex asked, she looked back at him with a soft smile. “nothing… I Just never went to prom before”

“Really?” he was surprised, in his eyes y/n was beautiful and a pretty smart doctor. He assumed she probably had a ton of guys wanting her. And he thought Derek was a complete idiot for losing her.

She shook her head. “no one really wanted to ask me…”

“I would have…” He continued to sway to the music, not breaking eye contact with her. Alex looks into her eyes. She had the prettiest hazel eyes he ever saw and the more he looked the more he could see himself falling for her. He couldn’t help but keep looking, they were like pools of honey. It was a nice way to get his mind off of work and the LVAD wire cutting incident. His eyes were locked into hers. He couldn’t help but admire her beauty.

“I was one of those nerdy girls no guy was interested in…” she said softly.

He put his hand on her cheek. She was just so beautiful, he had never thought about her like this before. And now the whole idea of her seemed so new to him and it was making him like her more. “That’s ridiculous. Look how beautiful you are. I don’t know why guys did not ask you out… I don't know why shepherd was stupid enough to lose you”

Her heart pounded against her chest when he said that. She hid her burning cheeks and rested her head on his shoulder as he moved to the music. “I got bumped up a couple of grades because I was smart… I played D&D… I was the weird kid because I didn't want to go out and get drunk”

Alex couldn't believe what he was hearing. He playfully chuckles as they slowly danced around oh... “oh, you were one of those geeks,” he said playfully.

Y/n scoffed playfully, resting her head on his shoulder gently “playing D&D isn't the geekiest thing in the world…”

Alex couldn't help but smile at her reaction. He rubbed the small of her back as they danced. “I was on the wrestling team… Who am I to judge”

“Wow, a wrestler” she laughed softly and playfully into his shoulder. “yeah... I was in marching band, school newspaper... All that nerdy stuff”

“Marching band huh?” he teased her, he lifted their arms up and he slowly spun her around before bringing her back to his chest. “you were a band geek, who knew”

“who knew you could dance” she teased back.

He smirked at her, holding her hand and continued to dance with her with zero embarrassment. “Shut up” he said playfully.

“ya know… If we went to the same high school, I would have been proud to go to prom with you.” he had a serious look on his face now. He was not messing around anymore. His friends would have made fun of him but the more he thought about it, the more he realized he didn’t care.

Her heart fluttered as she smiled, she wrapped her arms around his neck and played with the hair at the neap of his neck. “I would have been proud to go out with you too... All of my geeky friends would have been terrified of you though” she joked softly as we swayed to the music

He smiled softly and wrapped an arm around her waist. The other hand is still resting on her lower back. He leaned in to nuzzle her neck slightly. “I was always the scary one.” he whispered. “But you’re not afraid of me now are you?”

She ran her fingers through his hair as he nuzzled her neck. “I never was”

He smiled against her skin and kissed it gently. “Good.” he whispered before pulling back to look at her. His eyes searching hers for something, he couldn’t quite put his finger on what though. There was just something about her that he hadn't seen before, it drew him in and made him want more.

Y/n smiled as she stared into his chocolate brown eyes. Deep down she always knew there was more to him than him just being a surgery hungry asshole intern that slept around with nurses.

“Would you believe me if I said I always had a thing for nerds like you?” he said in a playful tone, he wasn’t joking. He genuinely liked her intelligence. She was beautiful and smart and that's what Alex liked in a woman.

“I don't know,” she said in a playful tone. Alex lifted her arm up and gently spun her around then pulled her back to his chest.

He leaned in to nibble on her earlobe softly, they both continued to sway to the music so their conversation didn't look suspicious. “I’m serious.” he whispered before trailing kisses down her neck. He could feel her pulse racing under his lips.

Alex smirked against her blushing skin. He loved how responsive she was to him. He lifted his head slightly to look at her once more. His eyes searching hers. "Do you want me to stop?”

She looked him in the eyes and shook her head. “N-no…” she said softly.

Alex's smirk grew as he felt her hesitation turn into desire. He leaned in once more, his lips pressing against hers with a soft yet hungry kiss, making her heart pounded against her chest . His hands slid up her back, pulling her closer as he deepened the kiss as her hand held his jaw.

The loud music masked the small moan that slipped past her lips as Alex's hands slid down her back, gripping her ass. Alex pulled her even closer, his tongue slipped into her mouth, dancing with hers in a heated duel. He could taste the sweetness of her lips and it only made him want more. She wrapped her arms around his neck, they were barley dancing now and the 'prom' was forgotten.

Alex groaned into the kiss, loving how responsive she was. He felt his blood rushing through his veins, making him hard against her body. He pressed her closer to him, rolling his hips in a small motion, making a small moan get caught in her throat. Y/n slowly pulled away from the kiss and rested her forehead against his, trying to catch her breath.

Alex closed his eyes, breathing heavily as he felt her against him. He wanted her so badly but he knew they couldn't do this here. “We should go somewhere else,” he murmured against her lips before leaning in to steal another kiss.

“Let's get outta here,” she said quietly.

Alex's hands never left her waist as he led her through the crowd, making their way towards an empty examination room. Once inside, he locked the door and pushed her against it, forcing a moan to escape past her. She tugged on his hair as his lips crashed into hers again, his tongue slipping past her lips as he devoured her mouth.

Alex's hands roamed up her thighs, hitching her dress higher. He could feel how wet she already was and it only made him harder. He slid his hand between their bodies, rubbing against her swollen clit through her underwear. “Fuck,”

“Alex” she moaned, her head falling back against the wall as his fingers danced around her most sensitive area.

Alex growled low in his throat, slipping a finger under the elastic of her panties to slowly push them down her thighs as he fell to his knees in front of her. He replaced his finger with his tongue, lapping at her folds and tasting her sweet nectar. She let out another moan, tugging at his hair and arching her hips off the wall.

Alex hummed against her folds, loving the way she responded to his touch. He suckled on her clit, flicking his tongue over it as he circled his finger around her entrance. He groaned when he felt how wet and swollen she was for him.

Her legs got wobbly and she arched her hips, moaning. “A-Alex…”

Alex kept sucking and flicking her clit, driving her wild with his expert tongue. He hummed against her, loving the way she squirmed underneath him. He placed his hand on her thighs, squeezing gently. "Shh...I got you, baby.”

Y/n’s heart pounded against her chest as felt herself getting closer and closer to the edge. “A-Alex, I'm c-close” she moaned as her head fell back in pleasure, eyes screwed shut.

Alex wanted her to come undone for him. He lifted up her leg and set It on his shoulder and sucked harder on her clit, swirling his tongue around it as he thrust his finger deeper into her wet heat. “Come for me,” He growled, not relenting until she did.

“Alex!” she moaned louder, tugging at his hair as she came undone on his tongue.

Alex hummed around her clit, enjoying the sweet taste of her as she came undone. He kept sucking and flicking until he felt her muscles start to relax. “Fuck, Angel” he groaned, pulling away slowly and kissing his way up her body as her fingers trailed down his body.

Alex kissed her deeply, she could taste herself on his lips. He pulled her closer, grinding against her as he grew harder. “I need you,” he whispered against her mouth. He quickly pulled the zipper of her dress down, making it pool to their feet. He lifted her up, pushing her onto the examination table.

“Take me” she grabbed his tie, pulling him between her legs. He slammed his lips against hers, the kiss was messy and rushed as she unbuttoned his shirt and pushed it off his shoulders.

Alex looked down at her, his eyes dark and intense as he quickly unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants down. He positioned himself at her entrance and slid in slowly, watching her face for any sign of discomfort. “Tell me if it hurts,” he whispered against her lips before thrusting deeper.

She moaned, arching her hips against his as the pain quickly turned into pleasure. “oh, fuck”

Alex groaned, feeling her walls clenching around him. He started to move faster, his hips slapping against hers as he took her hard and fast. “That's it,” he growled, nipping at her neck. “Fuck, you feel so good.”

Shemoaned against his neck, digging her nails into his back. “A-Alex!” she wrapped her legs around his waist, pushing him deeper inside her.

Alex cried out, feeling her tighten around him. He lost himself in the sensation, thrusting harder and faster as they became one. His hips slapped against hers in a rhythmic cadence that echoed through the room. “God, you're so fucking tight,”

She tugged at his hair. “Alex, I'm gonna cum!” she cried out desperately and tugged at his hair.

Alex groaned, feeling her inner walls pulsing around him. He slammed into her one last time, she cried out and bit his shoulder. He slammed into her one last time before pulling out, shooting his hot seed across her stomach and chest. “Fuck,” he panted.

Alex collapsed on top of her, their bodies sticky with sweat and each other's fluids. He nuzzled into her neck, breathing heavily as he tried to catch his breath. “That was... intense,” he murmured with a chuckle.

“A-amazing” she moaned breathlessly.

Alex grinned against her skin before slowly pulling out of her. He reached down and gently wiped some of his seed off her stomach with his tie, chuckling softly. “You're a mess,” he teased as he knelt down and picked up her jumbled up dress.

“It's your fault” she teased as Alex helped her step into her dress.

Alex laughed softly, his eyes trailing down her curves as he zipped the dress back up for her. “I suppose it is,” he agreed as he placed a kiss on her neck. “But I'd do it again in a heartbeat.” He smirked, pulling his shirt back over his shoulder, before he buttoned it back up he leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.

Alex pulled back and smiled back at her, his gaze softening as he studied her face. “You're beautiful,” he murmured before leaning in to capture her lips in a slow, passionate kiss. He savored the taste of her on his tongue, wishing this moment could last forever.

She pulled away, smirking. “who knew Alex Karev was such a softie”

He let out an airy chuckle. “only for you” he smirked, kissing her on the nose.

[teardrop-scales]

For once a number one

(Adam x female!reader)

A.N: this is purely self indulgent, but I decided to publish this anyway. Hurt-comfort I guess and general fluff, although this is Adam we're talking about, so of course there are swear words and some suggestive stuff.

Please note that english is not my first language, so there might be some mistakes. Also, my Adam is probably ooc.

(Also I suck at beginnings, endings and titles, sorry ><)

You don't even hear him come in.

No wonder, since you are currently blasting his band's music on full volume. Mostly 'Stick it to the man' to be honest; until now it always helped you cheer up and relax a little if you were angry at something or someone. But this time even this wasn't helping. Still you refuse to turn it off because you love your boyfriend's voice and his music (even though you won't ever tell him that, his ego is big enough as it is).

So here you are, laying on the couch with 'Stick it to the Man' blasting in the background, still in your more formal and nicer clothes, not even having the strength to change into more comfy ones, only forcing yourself to take off your boots once you got inside.

Pathetic much.

And so, that's why you almost have a heart attack when the loud music suddenly stops and you hear the voice of your boyfriend, this time talking and standing a few meters away from the couch.

"Heyyy, I see your music taste is still intact, babes! Though if you wanted to hear my singing, you could've just asked me for a private concert. For a price, 'course~."

You don't bother to look up at him, but you can imagine the smug grin on his face and the wiggling of his eyebrows.

To be honest, you thought you had more time until Adam comes home. You didn't want him to see you like this. He never was very good at this 'mushy, sappy emotional shit' (his words). And you really don't have the strength now to deal with his mocking and teasing.

So you just groan in response.

Even though Adam isn't usually really good at reading people and their emotions, your state makes it clear even for him that something is wrong.

"Geez, the fuck is up your ass?" He hisses, walking towards the couch and putting a cold palm on your forehead to check for fever. "You sick or somethin'?"

You, albeit a bit reluctantly, swat his hand away.

"I'm not sick. I have some other problems, you wouldn't understand." You respond, still laying on the couch, pathways made from tears still visible and fresh on your cheeks.

Adam scoffs and puts his hands on his hips.

"Try me, bitch."

You finally look him in the eyes, skeptically.

"Are you really gonna listen to me yap about this? Without cutting me off and mocking me?" Somehow you want him to both go away and stay right beside you.

"You always listen to me when I'm fucking mad at something and need to talk it out." He shrugs. "The least I can do is return the favor for once, since I'm so generous and in a good mood today. Now move your ass."

Adam makes the 'shoo' gesture with his hand, and you move a bit to the side on the couch, making space for him to sit down. Once he plops down on the couch, you put your head in his lap.

"Where to even start." You say in a bit of a sarcastic manner, your voice breaking just a bit once again.

You tell him everything, somehow managing to not break down again during the tale. You tell him how your friend got bored of you when another, seemingly more interesting and fun person than you appeared. How when the tree of you hang out, they paid more attention to the new person, only rarely talking to you and when they did, they were a lot colder towards you. It wasn't fucking fair. You were there longer and you always tried your best to be a good friend, the best you could be. And it still wasn't enough.

Surprisingly, Adam kept his promise and didn't cut you off even once. Instead, he was on his phone the whole time, but with his other hand he played with your hair. He only let out some hums of acknowledgement every now and then, not looking at you at all. It may have seemed like he was disinterested in your problem, but the way his fist clenched around the strands of your hair during certain parts of your story suggested otherwise.

"...and that's the situation." You sigh heavily finishing your rant after a while.

Adam scoffs and puts his phone down.

"Well, what do you want me to say, bitch?" He shrugs. "I mean, yeah, sure sucks to be you I guess, but why the fuck are ya getting so worked up over this?"

"Well, that's because--"

"Honestly, thought you were tougher than that. Thought you were a badass, not a pathetic little cunt--"

"Adam, you promised you wouldn't cut me off." You remind him coldly, lifting your head from his lap and glaring at him.

Adam rolls his eyes.

"Fine, fine, jeez." He tsks. "Sorry, babe."

You stay quiet for a few seconds, searching for the right words. This is tricky, your boyfriend is not the best at dealing with emotions like this. He can't relate because he has a totally different strategy when someone doesn't like him. Heck, most of Heaven doesn't like him, he just doesn't seem to care. He always makes it seem so easy. You envy him in that aspect, you envy his ability to not give a fuck.

"You know what?" You finally say, causing him to raise an eyebrow. "I wouldn't care if this was a first situation like this. I wouldn't give a damn. But the truth is, this happens to me every single motherfucking time I manage to form a meaningful relationship with someone." Despite your best efforts, frustration tears appear in your eyes. "I'm tired of this. Tired of being thrown aside once everyone gets bored of me, tired of always being second-best, of being the spare friend and 'number two'. "

You shake your head and then say quietly:

"I bet sooner or later you're gonna get bored of me and leave too."

Silence falls. You don't dare to look Adam in the eyes as you sit beside him on the couch, but at a slight distance.

You're not looking at him, so you fail to notice the flabbergasted and almost offended look on his face.

"The FUCK!?" Adam suddenly breaks the silence with his angry shout as you look at him confused. "I'm not fucking going anywhere! You're stuck with me babes, whether you like it or not. Also, geez, I know I'm a major jerk but I'm not like those trash you call friends!"

You finally dare to look at him, amazed. He really seems put off by your suggestion. You feel your heart flutter at his words and his statement that he isn't gonna leave no matter what. Despite his many flaws, Adam always has been very loyal and dedicated to you. You feel ashamed that you doubted him. Before you can apologize however, he continues his rant:

"And anyway, fuck them--"

You raise an eyebrow in amusement at his wording. Adam sees your expression and scowls before smirking.

"Look who's dirty minded now, bitch~" He teases you, earning a light slap on the shoulder.

Adam chuckles and you roll your eyes, but with a small smile dancing on your lips.

"Whatever." You say, wanting him to continue.

"I meant like, stop giving a fuck about those fake-ass people, y'know! You fucking rock babe, and if they can't see that, it's their loss. Don't waste your precious time on those who don't deserve it."

Your smile kept growing the longer he kept talking. Of course, his rant didn't magically solve your problem, you were still mad and sad, but less now. Because now you are sure that Adam will always be on your side.

"...you should focus on people who really deserve your time. Like me." Adam finishes with a smug grin as you slap his arm lightly, both of you chuckling.

Then you climb in his lap and hug him by the neck, minding the spikes on his collar, but still pressing your face in the crook between his neck and shoulder. Adam smells of his usual cologne and you can sense a faint scent of ribs, which he must've had for lunch.

"Thank you, honey." You say softly. "I think I needed to hear that."

You can feel the First Man shiver slightly at the sweet nickname. You know that that's his weakness, even though he always tries to act like he doesn't like it.

You wait for him to tease you or try to make this moment sexual like he usually does. You expect Adam to go back to his usual annoying self. But instead, he sighs through his nose and slowly wraps his arms around your back and waist, hugging you tightly and pressing you even more into his soft chest and stomach. He even wraps his beautiful golden wings around you for extra comfort.

"Anytime, sweetie." Adam says softly while caressing your back gently.

Something swells in your chest at the nickname he almost never uses. The only times Adam uses this particular one is when he's mocking you or someone or when he's feeling especially soft and at ease. Even though you two have been dating for quite some time now, you only recall one or two instances of him using "sweetie" as a nickname for you in a soft manner, not counting now of course.

You smile into his neck and raise your head slightly to press a kiss to his cheek.

You both stay silent for a while, just enjoying each other's presence and touch.

"You know" Adam says suddenly, still embracing you. "If you need friends or some shit, I can set up a meeting for you with my girls and Lute. They've been up my ass recently about wanting to 'get to know you' ".

"That's actually not a bad idea." You reply, pressing your cheek against his.

"Yeah, it's a win-win situation, babe." Adam muses, squeezing you momentarily. "You get new friends, and I get some fucking peace from their pestering."

You giggle.

You were scared to talk to him about your problems, knowing how he is. But now you realize that was stupid. Adam is a jerk to everyone but you. He's always been more patient, gentle and soft with you than with anyone else. You feel really ashamed for thinking he wouldn't listen to you and support you in your problems, even if they are trivial to him.

"I'm sorry for not believing that you'd listen to me and my problems." You sigh. "And I'm sorry for saying that you'd leave me and comparing you to my ex-friends."

"Yeah, you should be fucking sorry." Adam grumbles, grabbing you to lean you away from him a bit and then embracing your face with his palms. "You're one of the best things to ever happen to me, truly babe. I love you, you're my bitch and I wouldn't trade you for anyone."

You smile brightly, placing your smaller hands on his bigger ones on your cheeks. Then Adam continues before you can say anything, like he usually does.

"And if I ever hear you doubting yourself like that again, I'll literally fuck these thoughts out of you. I'll fuck you until you start to see yourself as a motherfucking goddess." He threatens with a grin.

You laugh. This time not a giggle or chuckle, but a big, bubbly laugh. You don't fail to notice the soft, fleeting smile which appears on your boyfriend's face at the sound of you laughing, but don't comment on it.

"Don't threaten me with a good time, darling." You tease after you calm down, putting your hands on his cheeks and squeezing them a bit. "I love you too."

Then you lean towards him and carefully place your lips on his in a gentle kiss. And for once, Adam doesn't make the kiss more heated, instead kissing you back just as softly.

For once, you feel completely and utterly loved and appreciated. For once you're someone's number one.

[cheriladycl01]

Better than me - Charles Leclerc x Reader P9

Plot: You are a rookie in your first f1 season, adding to the ever-growing amount of Brits performing in the grid

Once you'd woken up and were told you wouldn't be able to race until Silverstone you were devastated.

You cried and cried until your mum pulled up your team principle phoned you and explained their was no way they were replacing you yet. You still had your seat.

You were still in the hospital by the time Hungary had come around and were forced to watch it on your iPad being told of by the nurses every time you got to excited.

Lando, Charles and Alex all had done special helmets for you being close to you. And they'd actually all attempted to call you and visit you. They'd gotten a few fleeting texts from you but that was about general stuff but as far as they were told you were refusing to have visitors which upset them all.

By the time Monza came two weeks later, you were so down in the dumps and even though you were out the hospital you couldn't bring yourself to go to the paddock.

And because of the long distance travel you also didn't attend Montreal. You watched at home with your parents who were just as worried about your mental health as they were with your physical health.

When Physio started with your personal trainer you were so demotivated and cried to him almost every day. But he was there for you the whole time, and he really shouldn't have been as it was private between the two of you, but whenever he was called to Germany to the Audi HQ he would tell Alex how you were doing, which in turn led Alex to tell the grid what was going on.

Monaco was the first race you attended even though a lot of people were apprehensive with you coming because of your injuries. But it was Monaco and you felt ready to see everyone.

You walked through the paddock and all the fans were shocked to see you there.

Strangely they were all super respectful, not crowding or touching you in places that may hurt and didn't stick around for long. It was a nice feeling being back in the paddock but almost felt like something was missing. You weren't going to be on track or racing.

"Y/N?" a voice behind you calls that you know all to well.

"Lan?" you smile and open your arms slowly, he comes closer to you tears in his eyes as he looks over you.

"I- I'm sorry its all my fault" he cries looking over you before carefully wrapping his arms around you. He yaps some more about how it was his fault and how he shouldn't be racing today it should be you and you had to literally stop him from talking.

"Lan, its fine. I'm not upset. I'm glad you are okay. It happens in racing and hey I'll be back racing in Silverstone hopefully" you grinned and you guys spoke for a while until he was needed else where. He really didn't want to leave but you'd practically forced him too.

Then Alex and Lily came, demanding why you didn't let them come see you and why you'd been living under a rock all this time.

"I'm sorry guys, but I was just really down with not being able to do much and you know it was hard after the accident coming to terms with everything. I was embarrassed and didn't want to see anyone" you'd explained and Lily tried to look furious but turned to thankful yet worried older sister in seconds, pulling you into a light hug in order not to hurt you while Alex rubbed your shoulder.

You all had a really heartfelt moment that was caught by some media teams, Alex and Lily dragged you back to the Audi garage and made sure you had a comfortable seat, everyone was really happy to see you again and you ended up being bombarded with questions.

You spent some time with the reserve driver who was happy to be filling in for you but knew this wasn't a free seat to take as he knew you'd be back and he knew Audi would want you back.

And afterwards you spend time watching free practice. It was always fun in Monaco and it was supposed to be your first year as a driver here, you'd yet to drive the historic track and you knew 2027 might be better for you but ... you couldn't help but feel that sinking sensation in the pit of your stomach.

You had what Amy Santiago had FOMOAW - Fear of Missing Out at Work.

The day was ending up and you were taking a slow walk back to the car where you parents were waiting to take you back to the hotel. Walking was still a little difficult and painful but you knew the more you moved in little increments the quicker you'd be back to racing.

"Y/N?" some shouts from behind you but it seems shocked and more like a question. You stand still for a second, trying to correlate that voice and of course it was Charles Leclerc.

"Hello Charlie" you say softly.

The accident had put a lot into perspective for you. Silly pettiness from you would have potentially cost Charles ever being able to understand you had forgiven him, if things had taken a turn for the worst in the hospital. And in fact you'd forgiven him a very long time ago but you didn't want to show that in fear of getting hurt again.

"Oh my gosh, you are here!" he says carefully looking over at you.

"Yeah, I'm here" you smile looking at him. He looked a little rough, not a bad rough but like all his usual pristine self-care had depleted.

"Look , i need to say this before you run away or leave I need to get it off my chest!" he lets out in a breath and you cant help but giggle a little.

"I'm not going too-" you start but he steps closer to interrupt you.

"Please just let me ... i need to explain my, what i did it was not right and I am sorry. I - i shouldn't have believed stupid stupid whispers around the paddock, and I shouldn't have let Ferrari make a complaint against you. I really like you. You are an incredible driver and I think you are going to come so far in the sport... i mean you already have its amazing but ... fuck I'm getting of track. What I'm trying to say is I'm sorry and can we please start over again as friends and can you forgive me for all those cruel things i said" he asks looking over your expression which was one of concentration hanging off every word he was telling you.

"Charlie... look i forgave you a long time ago. I knew you didn't mean it, you were just heated with the races. Like we all are... and you know Ferrari wouldn't have listened to you on a matter like this... so i no longer hold a grudge for any of it. Okay?" you smile and he looks shocked.

"So I am forgiven?" he asks and you nod, moving closer and placing a kiss on his cheek.

"Forgiven ... IF" you start with a smirk making him frown and his puppy eyes come out in worry.

"You buy me dinner. I'm starving and I'm not racing right now so I'm craving a really greasy pizza or cheeseburger" you smile and he nods.

"I- I can do dinner" he smiles and you nod walking away with a big grin on your face.

Charles was in shock, to the point he remained there until Carlos found him just staring into the abyss and he told him all about what had just happened.

And for you, well ...

The world, despite you not racing, felt righted.

For now.

Taglist:

@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @viennakarma @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount

[aernthetransfrormer]

Identity Debates #4 Radqueers

I'm going to be making a few posts about "controversial identities" I want to here argument both for and against it. You don't personally have to believe the argument, just something you've hear/come up with. Also, this is the last post. :)))

The main reason I'm against rad queers is because a large part of them support MAPS/YAPS as if they're not just pedophiles. I'm also kinda offended by transabled, transabuse, etc people because I actually have those expirience it, I don't understand why anyone would want to transPTSD. I don't have PTSD, but I do have trauma. It's kinda offensive to be like, "I wish I went through that :c" No. YOU. DO. NOT. Being transharmful is worse in my opinion, Just because YOU SHOULD NEVER WANT TO HARM ANYONE!!!! You can be trans age I guess because you agere, transspecies, BUT WHY TRANSHARMFUL? THE WORST PART IS I'VE SEEN A LOT OF PEOPLE TRANSITION AND PURPOSFULLY HARM PEOPLE! I sometimes tell myself it can't be that much of a large part of the community, but it's so much it's still bad imo

The only thing I am okay with is trans race adopted people/anyone who's family is a different race so they celebrate things and act like people of a race they weren't born into. I do have a problem though with people who are transrace just because they think it's cool. As a Mexican, it's kinda racist??? You can celebrate the holidays, enjoy the food, and everything else without becoming the other race. None of them should try to physically change themselves though. Just like I said in my other posts, I don't have a problem with the cringe part of it, just those offensive and objectively terrible parts. Being transspecies is like being alterhuman. Who really cares? I don't care about those parts, but there's so much bad I am against radqueers. The argument that they aren't hurting anyone doesn't even work because they are being discriminatory AND SUPPORT PEDOS???

I would say # Rad queers interact! but I'm gonna trigger way to many people into pointless arguments. If you aren't VERY triggered, please tell me anything you have heard about supporting radqueers. You don't nesacarily have to agree with it though. Edit: A few people have responded and I am understanding a bit more why people are radqueer. I still don't think it's that good though, not THAT bad either though. 1. I still believe transharmful is bad because you should never want to harm anyone. 2. I know paraphilias are something people actually struggle with and they deserve support, but they shouldn't be celebrated. At least not in the way like LGBTQ+ is. 3. I do mostly agree with at least what most people have responded with. 4. do understand using transID for introjects who want to be more like their source, but I personally believe it's best to separate from your source. Having wayyyy to many Wilbur fictives, me (host) and all of them have had some existential crisis from not understanding whether or not I am the source. (obviously no but its still stressful) 5. I still don't understand transdisorder/transable. I understand why people use them, but I still don't think it's good most of the time. It's still offensive imo. This is because wishing you had it worse isn't something to be proud of, it's kind of an insult towards people struggling with those things. YOU CAN EXPIRIENCE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU IDENTIFY AS RADQUEER BUT ITS NOT ALWAYS SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF! specifically paraphillias, transrace, transdisorder, and transabled. You can expirience them and I agree we shouldn't have stigmas against paraphilias, but you shouldn't be proud of it (at least like LGBTQ+ is)

btw, I wouldn't consider radqueers as LGBTQ+ because LGBTQ is about struggling with gender and/or sexual and romantic orientation but radqueers don't have to do with either

ANOTHER EDIT :0 Radqueers... aren't actually that bad. Thank you to everyone who answered. Tbh, I'm mostly neutral on it in like half the cases lol. As long as it isn't hurting anyone, YAY! lol idk what to say I'm not against radqueer identities, I just personally think there are better options. like 70% of it is alright and the rest is... eh, kinda bad? I think transharm identies are okay but I still don't really know about trans race, transabled, and other things that are kinda biggoted. I understand why people use the labels, but I don't think it's right? Idk if that makes sense. I think it's better to just accept yourself first.

[gotham-daydreams]

Hi hi! Anon that can easily stay stuck in their imagination here-

I'm so glad you answered my ask!! And yeah in a situation like not [] where they will try very hard to not physically hurt the reader a case where they will is more difficult. Honestly it depends on the person's will.

Most people can't take torture nor can that take having their independence taken away.

And while the reader in not [] is very much more angry than numb to them at the end of part 3, I feel it takes a lot to be broken.

Personally spite would keep me from giving in. I don't have a lot to ask for but basic decency and admittance of guilt but the batfam is too prideful and selfish to ever do such a thing.

And I live with pain all the time so being in more pain isn't ideal but it's not something I couldn't handle. In the case were my limbs are taken they only thing they can't take from me is my mind

I mean they could always try other methods, drugs and surgeries (lobotomy is such a horrifying concept fr) and such but honestly doing that would be completely destroying what once was.

The batfam is mostly selfish to the point where they are obsessed with the IDEA of reader not who they actually are. A part of me would hope that in destroying who reader was they would feel remorse and do what's right but the other part of me doubts that.

It would take a lot for them to actually feel to do what's right and at that point what's right is taking reader out back for a final send off.

But in such a case where the mind is gone then you really have nothing but a shattered vase. You can try putting it back together but you'll never succeed. A broken vase is much easier to fix than a shattered one after all.

Overall I have enough spite and mostly enough pain tolerance to stick through my decision of staying with my head in the clouds

In all honestly the human body can only last so long when the person in the body has no will to exist. You can feed it and bathe it, take care of that bag of flesh made to carry your bones and organs with all the right ingredients, but the brain knows when the metaphorical heart isn't in it and will only last so long, no amount of reviving can fix that sadly

It's why I wouldn't mind being kidnapped if they would actually take the steps to put their pride and selfish nature away. Yeah staying trapped in the manor sucks but continuing on with the forgive and forget attitude is a surefire way to get one to despise your guts.

I'm so glad you have returned for a bit!! I apologize for rambling in your ask box I am a certified yapper and hopefully all my yapping doesn't sound as scatterbrained as it does in my head-

Stay safe!! Don't forget to hydrate! I hope you have a lovely day or night

YES!!! YOU GET IT!! HAHA!

Also don't even worry about it, I love all of these long submissions and such and they are such a joy to read!!! I hope you have an amazing day/afternoon/night as well, and again, don't even worry! I'm a certified yapper too LMAO

But seriously you so get it and I love you for that anon! The family is so fixated on the idea of the reader moreso than them as an actual person. They, ultimately, care more about feeding their own delusions and ideas of what could be - and they do that through the reader. Misery loves company, after all, and what I was also basically trying to get at with the previous post which is, well-

They'll grasp at straws. They'll tear away at everything, and destroy whatever they 'have to', and anything that gets in the way if it means getting what they want. No matter how broken it is, they'll keep replacing parts- and even if it'll never be the same, even if you will never be the same, as long as you look the same, and physically are the same person... well, they'll keep that. They'll take what they can get, and they'll make sure of that above all else - even if it means essentially losing you in the process.

If anything, I also feel like my other previous posts I've made today support that- LMAO

That they'll absolutely destroy you, only to physically keep you around, and whereas they'll all have their own methods of treating you and keeping you around - as I do doubt that all of them will be so selfish and self centered to not even try to apologize or work things out in a semi civil manner - its still ultimately harmful regardless. Though, that's mainly because of their borderline obsession with progress.

Specifically, for the Not [ ] Series (and I hope this'll show in Chapter 4 as it is sort of why things go down the way they do), why things have ultimately turned this way and why they get so messy so quickly is because of that obsession of progress. Obviously, they want to be with the reader and be the totally happy family that they never were - but they're biggest problem is that they're impatient. They're impatient and the reader... well, they basically aren't giving the family any avenues to make progress-

WHICH IS OKAY!! It's perfectly fine to want space and time just... away from others, especially if they are the ones that hurt you so deeply and greatly affected their life. Especially when, like the reader, the family made them suffer alone and by themself for years. They were essentially isolated and kept away from everyone except for Alfred, and no one encouraged them. No one was there for them at all, and as they express and say in Chapter 3 - they feel like their efforts were in vain. Everything was all for not, and it's okay to want to be away from that, even if the family technically didn't do anything, because it was ultimately their inaction that caused this in the first place.

The reader just needs space because, until a few months ago, they were around and stuck in a place where they felt unneeded, unwanted, and just... alone. They want more of that space so that they can clear their head and finally focus on what they want to do in their life, because now they're actually getting a chance to actually live their life and they love it! So the prospect of going back.. of being in the mansion again? Of going back to that horrible, isolating life? They can't do it. Especially when they can't bring themself to believe that the family's intentions are genuine. Especially when they just don't want to 'risk' things going back to how they were, because god damn it- they just started living their life!! And it's like the family is trying to take that away again.

Nevertheless, the family will still try to do what they can to get what they want, and if Chapter 4 will show anything, is that when given no room... they'll make it. They'll rip and tear, and most importantly, they'll take.

I feel like the end of Chapter 4, and subsequently- the beginning of Chapter 5 (if i write it how i think I will when i get to that point) will definitely spawn all the spite and dread someone will need for a lifetime, believe me! And honestly I have all hopes for people like you being able to withstand the torment that will come from most of the family. Though, I will also say that, or course, that is most of them.

Push comes to shove, hell, at least Alfred will have you with how reasonable he'll seem - with him definitely beinf the most guilty when it comes to making others out to be worse than they are, and acting as your savior. Both literally and figuratively as he will comfort you and, as usual, act as a voice of reason with some much added sass thrown in there.

I also feel like Bruce, despite his own pride, would also sit down and talk it out - and I won't go into much detail here as it will be shown in Chapter 4, but let's just say he'll try. He may not be very successful as he is a man of few words at his core, but I'll say that he won't be one of the people impulsively tearing off any limbs, that's for sure!

Barbara is in a similar boat as she'll try to reason and talk things out, but she isn't one of the family members 'living' with you, so...

Aaand I won't go too indepth with the others as I feel this post in long enough- though just note as well that Selina would try to be another voice of reason (and also manipulation), and so would Duke - who would try to also hold people back from doing anything 'rash' (since, if anyone is going to not only seem reasonable, but also feel genuine, it would be him. hands down. and sure, maybe it'd be Dick... if the whole argument didn't happen LMAO) if they were in the series, which... I'll definitely try to include them going forward as they are apart of the Batfam- I just didn't have a means to include them into the series, and now that it's lowley wrapping up... well, I think it's just best to include them elsewhere!

Nevertheless, thanks for sending this in! I really enjoyed reading it, along with the first one you sent in as well! I love long submissions so much (though any submission/ask makes me happy as hell), and, again, this was really fun!! I always love a good excuse to yap too, as you can tell...

Regardless, again, have an amazing day/afternoon/night, anon!!! You get it fr 💛💛💛

And if I misread or misunderstood anything... feel free to correct me! I read pretty fast and tend to skip over words and such by accident, which is... hilarious considering things, but yeah! I'm sorry if I misunderstood anything, but regardless, again, this has been fun and I love you 💛

[bluegekk0]

Honestly, I wish I was better at maintaining friendships. I don't have the energy to consistently message people, especially when it feels like it's always me reaching out and almost never the opposite. I can't tell if I should be doing more or if the problem lies in that I'm too annoying and they don't actually want to talk to me. And then it just feels like friends move on to talk to other people and I'm left behind, which of course makes me think that I'm a terrible friend and not someone worth their time. It hurts but maybe it's my fault. I don't know, it's almost 2am and I'm tired but I've been stressing over this for the past few days. Just, dealing with the kind of hopeless feeling, the confusion whether it's my fault or not, and a bit of jealousy at times. Not a fun combination, which only makes me feel more like a bad person 😭

Apologies for the pity party I just wanted to get it off my chest I guess. Just some stupid feelings that I don't really know how to deal with. Maybe I'm just too entitled for wishing that some of the people I want to stay friends with would also reach out to me first sometimes. That's definitely a possibility and if that's the case then I guess I'll have to work on my mindset. But I suppose venting wouldn't hurt? So that's why I'm yapping here, yay.

[evony256]

SPOILERS FOR DRDT CHAPTER 2 EPISODE 13

TW: SUICIDE

I just wanted to share my thoughts on the episode too since I've seen a lot of people do that

By the way I had to watch this like 7 hours after it was released and I have not scrolled through Tumblr yet so I might bring up stuff that have already been discussed. Also all of these notes were written down while I was watching the episode so yeah

-Levi just moved up so much on my kin list it's insane like omg…

- This was one bad day for Acevi fans, huh. I guess the Xanvid came at a price

-Whit I can now see why David told you to shut up I like you but that was bad 💀 (he was probably left affected by how David reacted in episode 12 and is either really uncomfortable or somewhat intimidated by David now)

-Nah nah nah that's definitely not Teruko's secret so I'm gonna start theorizing now. Teruko might have most of the secrets. It's not like they belong to her, but if you think back to episode 8 she said that she doesn't know which secret is hers because so many things have happened in her life. She probably said that she got the family secret because she thought that was the most likely one. Hu's secret might also be accurate to her considering the fact that, in episode 4, she told Arei that failed suicide attempts are painful, hinting at the fact that she might have tried to kill herself at some point (also backed up by the fact that, in episode 3, she says "why save my life if you're just going to ruin it afterwards?" when talking about her medical debt). The idea that she has most (if not all, but I doubt that) of the secrets might tie in with the killing game secret since it says "How could I even select what secret to be your motive?". The wording here is very ambiguous since it could be interpreted as "secrets about your life" or "secrets that are on the board", like the ones that the other cast members have, the latter being something that I bet that nobody in the fandom thought about until this episode. Anyway theory over back to saying stupid shit

-AREI ILYSM YOU ARE MAKING ME CRY YET FEEL HAPPY THAT'S WHY YOU'RE MY FAVORITEEEEE 😭😭😭

-SHE GOT NEW SPRITES TOO SHE IS SO PRETTY

-I MADE AN AUDIBLE GASP NOISE WHEN THAT CG WITH EDEN SHOWED UP HOLY SHIT!!!! I think she might have hurt or killed the girl she kissed? Unless she killed Arei, which is still a posibility, or Levi lied about his secret for Eden’s sake (idea which could contribute to the "Eden killer Levi accomplice" theory), though Charles would have also needed to lie for Eden since he had her secret. Also, if we're going with Eden remorseless murderer theory, in my opinion, it wouldn't make sense for Eden to be a remorseless killer after what Arei said about her making a mistake "that she couldn't take back" (showing that she probably felt remorse for what she did). Also also this is a good time for me to bring up the note with "Eden's motive" that Charles gave to Teruko. That note could be proof of whether or not Eden really does have the girl kisser secret and I want to mention that the note could be anything since we only have Charles' word to rely on. I really hope we get to see what it says because it's been making me more suspicious of Charles (I personally think that Charles is somewhat suspicious so I might make a post about it soon even though there isn't much proper evidence to say that he has something to do with the killing game, there's still a couple of questionable things about what he's done/said). Okay yap session number two over

-Arei moved up even more on my kin list how is that even possible…. I also love how her voice changed so much in this episode. Even in prior episodes, her voice seemed so cheerful and energetic, yet in this one, it's much calmer. Showing that she truly is feeling relieved that there are other bad people in the world like her and that she might have a chance to redeem herself if so. God damnit Mokaui (Arei's VA) did such a good job with all of her voice lines she needs to be credited more

-THE AREI CG I AM CRYING AREI YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME ILYSM I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE BONUS EPISODE AFTER THIS

-They're finally talking about the murder method this is a new evolution for humanity

-Monotv causally breaking the forth wall, now we can blame it on the cast that they were talking about the secrets for an entire year because they didn't watch the Chapter 2 recap

-YESSS FINALLY A MINIGAME I’VE MISSED THESE SO MUCHHHH

-Ooh so that's what the broken handles meant also that Veronika art is so pretty

-I wonder why they would want to break her neck though, it doesn't seem like it would help with the murder at all, but maybe the killer was trying to cause confusion

-This is proving a theory that I've had for a while. If Arei was hung from the ceiling of the playground, then that could be tied in with the broken lights and the movie screening room above the playground. How would they be able to get her into the playground from the movie screening room though…

-J 💀 (that's all I’ve got to say literally)

-That's a lot of very precise information Whit I can understand Veronika but why would you know all that. Care to share something with the class?

-The text animations in the debate are so unique like the question marks with Rose and the one that circles around the top of Levi’s head those look so cool. Also getting to hear a lot of characters talk in a row feels amazing. It gives them a lot of depth showing the contrast between those characters’ tones of voice.

-Also there goes my screening room theory damn

-Everyone just roasting Teruko again is the best thing out of this episode /j

-We got puppy Whit 10/10 episode

-Also THREE CGS AND TWO MINIGANES IN ONE EPISODE??? DRDTDEV YOU HAVE BEEN COOKING 🔥🔥🔥 YOU CAN STOP NOW THE KITCHEN IS ON FIRE (IN THE GOOD WAY). YOU MADE AN ENTIRE BUFFET. THIS IS AN ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT YOU CAN STOP NOW-

-Ooooo she's talking about Ace's attempted murder

-(Probably) Nico and Ace focused episode next week Nico and Ace fans are gonna be eating good

Overall, this might be my favourite episode so far. Not like I had a favourite episode before but still this was SO good

Also I just checked my Tumblr notifications why are there 50 like oh my lord 💀

[paikothecateater]

I think Norway actually gets his feelings hurt very easily. He acts all cool and tough and nonchalant on the outside, but the minute someone insults him, he is 🤏 this close to crying

Norway is generally a very sensitive person. It's not a bad thing, but it does lead to him getting upset about a lot more.

It's not just insults. Any comment that isn't a compliment, he will be sad about.

Once, Denmark had the audacity to say that Norway's outfit was something he would expect him to wear and that it was interesting to see Norway in a new style.

Norway refused on principle to wear said outfit ever again.

Sweden once tried to fix Norway's hair to make it look more uniform. Norway now wears a cross pin indefinitely and he will refuse to take it off for as long as he may live.

He's gotten used to Iceland's insults. They're brothers. Norway also knows that Iceland could so much as call him a bitch and mean it with love. "why are you so fucking ugly?" is a sentence that is very often spoken in that house. It goes both ways by the way.

However, words aren't the only things that hurt his feelings.

Imagine this, if you will.

You are Iceland. You've lived in a house with your older brother for many many years. Throughout those years, you two have acquired multiple different sets of silverware. All of which were handpicked by your darling brother.

And so, as you head into the kitchen to grab some cutlery for a meal, something you've done nearly a million years over, you deliver the cutlery to the table, and all of a sudden, your brother is fully, utterly, purely convinced that you no longer love him, in fact, that you've never loved or cared about him.

Why? I hear you asking.

Why, you inconsiderate jerk, you happened to have brought him cutlery from a set that is in fact, not his favourite set.

You were not aware he had a favourite set of silverware.

He never mentioned a preference.

He was the one who picked out all of them, it wouldn't make sense for him to dislike any of them.

And yet here we are.

The punishment for your unforgivable crime of merely suggesting he use another set, is having to sit by him and try (and miserably fail) to convince your dearest brother that the cutlery you handed him was in fact, not an indication of hatred but pure common sense.

By the time he's convinced, the food's cold, Norway's still sulking and by this point Iceland is also beginning to absolutely despise the set of cutlery for making his evening miserable.

Thank you for coming to my yap session.

[miss-oranje-disco-dancer]

why do people write leon into incest/ rape stories? I get that people think he's hot but there is literally no aspect of his character that would warrant that kind of characterisation. I would just like to understand why out of all, you could have written shit like this about villains but not Leon, he would never do that. And I'm not talking about fics that showcase Leon's trauma and how he turned mean or does questionable things, sometimes I really enjoy reading those. It's only when those stories are only fabricated purely because of kinks that it disgusts me. Porn without plot, no explanation given, just him being a pervert and an asshole. Genuinely why do people write that and still claim to be resident evil fans, still claim to understand and love the characters. It doesn't add up to me at all. This is not directly at you specifically but just at people who do this and since you have written content in that category, I would love to hear your explanation. :(

why do people write leon into incest/ rape stories?

i think everyone's reasons are different, and ultimately, as long as it's just fiction, it doesn't really matter what someone writes about.

some people write dark content because they're into it, some people write it to cope with past trauma (there is quite a bit of overlap in those two categories). it's an avenue for exploration of these ideas that doesn't hurt anyone. whether that be in terms of exploring your own feelings or just trying to challenge your writing abilities and be creative.

I get that people think he's hot but there is literally no aspect of his character that would warrant that kind of characterisation.

i think his characterization is complex and a lot of people get it "wrong" (but i'm not here to argue about his characterization). i also have written him in ways that i would consider "ooc" - both in dark content and in fluff. i feel like i see people often complaining about leon being 'mischaracterized' in dark content, but people are not critical of him in fluff (or fluffy smut).

this is not to say that we need to be critical or stick to canon - if we wanted to stick to canon entirely, then we wouldn't create fanfiction at all. we're writing to explore situations that are not portrayed in the source material.

i think it's fun to make posts analyzing characterization and i think it's fun to write both in character fic and out of character fic, but i think those two things (analysis and fiction) should be separate.

would just like to understand why out of all, you could have written shit like this about villains but not Leon

you sure could write about the villains! a lot of people have written fics about wesker, for example. i personally don't find a lot of the resident evil villains that interesting, and if i did, i honestly think that humanizing them would make for a more interesting concept than showing their evilness.

he would never do that

correct. he's not real, so he wouldn't *do* anything.

It's only when those stories are only fabricated purely because of kinks that it disgusts me.

that's absolutely a fair opinion. i have kinks/topics that i'm uncomfortable with too. i have a low tolerance for "ick" i would say, so like vomit, scat, cannibalism, tentacles, etc. i can't read those things because it makes me feel nauseous. i don't read those types of stories for that reason!

i personally don't have a kink for noncon or incest. i have written incest on commission before because i am fine with other people enjoying it. i have written stepcest once, however (and while i think my point may have been too subtle for the audience to notice), it was supposed to be more than a "pwp" fic. it was supposed to showcase his manipulation of her.

the noncon that i have written has been not kink related and i think when you read it, it's pretty obvious. a lot of that was coping with personal trauma.

the thing is though, i don't have to justify this to you. i'm honestly just yapping about my content because i enjoy it atp

why do people write that and still claim to be resident evil fans, still claim to understand and love the characters.

i do understand and love the characters! i have played most of the mainline games for hundreds of hours (4 platinum trophies thus far!). i understand when i'm writing them ooc. i've written characters *way* more out of character than i have leon. for example, i made brad and richard both super homophobic in a fic when there's no evidence to say that they are.

i think it's fine to write characters ooc! also, characterization is kind of complex. just because something isn't said in canon, doesn't mean it isn't true (or isn't implied). for example, jill, in my eyes (and many others), is a lesbian. chris is also very queer-coded. though, neither of them are outright stated to be queer. i have written chris in straight relationships (as have others) despite the fact that i believe he is gay.

tl;dr

while it is interesting to analyze why people enjoy certain things, there's no sense in shaming people for what they enjoy when it's not hurting anyone else. writing about a fictional character doesn't hurt anyone because the person being written about isn't real.

so basically, in conclusion, does it really matter? (no)

[bewareofthenewphannie]

Hey sooo could u pls share the twitter essay here👉👈

context

thank you for the ask, I'm honored that you want to hear my thoughts on this, and thanks char for sending your anon over to me!

okay, you see the thing is, the reason I blurred it out is a bit anticlimactic: I have no actual clue what I was talking about.

I don't actually know too much about this topic of what the dynamics between dannies and phillies looked like in the past because I've only been here since november last year and have never seen someone really discuss this in depth, I've only seen it being mentioned in passing. So everything I wrote was assumptions I made based on vague posts and my general understanding of dnp's and the phandom's history. I feel like this was enough to get the gist of this across to someone who doesn't really know dnp (apart from my previous elaborate ramblings about them) but not enough to post it on tumblr.

so if somebody has any input regarding this topic please tell me! and if I'm saying anything that's wrong (which is very likely) please correct me, I'm genuinely curious to hear thoughts on this by someone who actually knows what they're talking about :)

I will put what I wrote, along with some commentary, under the cut!

(addition: as I'm writing this commentary I'm realising how little I actually know, so please don't take this as actual information but more as...an interesting case study of how a new phannie perceives the history of the phandom)

first of all some more background info:

the original question was "[are there any people who] only like one of them and hate/don’t care about the other one?".

some shorter messages leading up to the long one seen in the screenshot:

there used to be a dannie/phillie divide but afaik all the way back in like...2013. now there are obviously people who prefer one of them but not in a way that they actively dislike the other one. and within the phandom I don't think there are really people who feel indifferent about one of them cause yk the thing is, these days it's impossible to watch one of them alone. dan doesn't use his channel, we wouldn't even see him if it wasn't for phil and even when he did a live stream thingy for his solo tour, phil was there. and phil either includes or talks about dan in every video he makes. so I guess either you like both or neither, you don't really have much of a choice also, they make it so goddamn obvious how much they love and care for and apprechiate each other and what an important role they play in each other's life, it would be kind of weird to claim to be a fan of one of them and then hate the person they like the most, yk

this was asked in the context of us talking about why there's this phenomenon that if you have a group of famous people who are strongly associated with each other (for example boybands or actors that work together on a tv show), there'll often be one person that is "hated" by the fandom. Their hypothesis was that this happens when "the one hated is either problematic, doesn’t like the other(s), or is more successful than the other(s)".

okay first the relevant part of my answer: I think overall you're right. I feel like if someone's more popular an important factor for them being disliked is that it feels like they think they're better/more important than the rest of the group. or if they all started out together that they don't apprechiate where they've come from, which both obviously hurts people who like that thing this person dismisses. but this also goes the other way, the people who like that person who is more famous often dislike the others in that group for being "jealous"/"leeching" off of the more famous person's fame.

and finally the thing you actually asked about, the long messages froom the screenshot broken up into multiple parts with the afore mentioned commentary:

now the less relevant part which is just me yapping about dnp and why this didn't happen to them I can imagine that at the very beginning some people probably didn't like dan because he was just some random dude, just another fan, who suddenly was part of youtube and attached to phil.

did...did this actually happen? it seems plausible to me, and I obviously know about charlie etc but how did people really react to dan suddenly being part of the AmazingPhil universe? I know it was an entirely different youtube culture back then and everything happened on a much smaller scale, so it's really hard to estimate how people reacted to this back then. in fact, now that I think more about it, judging from old screenshots I've seen, even at the very beginning people mostly seemed to be quite supportive of them and I think dan got an overwhelmingly positive reponse to uploading his first videos?

can't tell you exactly what went down after that but I do know 2012 was incredibly difficult (long story). things were very tense and especially dan was reallyreally defensive during that time and he had his whole "we're two seperate people" phase.

okay, so if there was any time in the phandom where there was serious tension between dannies and phillies it must've been during this time, right? because from recent discussions I know that there was a point where especially phil wasn't exactly treated the best but I don't know when that was. I feel like it would make sense here though.

anyway, at some point dan surpassed phil's subscribers and I genuinely don't know but I would assume that strengthened that dannie/phillie divide.

Again, I don't actually know when this happened (I would assume some time around 2013/14?) and I have absolutely no idea what the actual reaction people had to this was. but if I know anything about fandoms, this definitely must've stirred up...something. I don't know how obsessed the phandom was with numbers but even if it wasn't that bad, I can't imagine this happening completely without drama attached to it.

but one thing you need to know is that phil was always incredibly supportive of dan and the other way round, dan never talked shit about phil.

correct me if I'm wrong, maybe we simply don't talk about this time that much (with good reason) and I know dan said and wrote a lot of things that were very dismissive about some stuff etc. but in the clips and old posts I've seen he still emphasised that they were friends and didn't hate each other.

and thennn they started their bbc radio show, their joint channel, released a book, went on tour in 2015/16, basically they fully embraced their DanAndPhil brand. this was their peak in popularity and from what I've heard people say that joined the phandom at that time this dannie/phillie divide was basically gone by then because yeah, people liked their seperate things but what really made them blow up was the things they did together.

this is based on something I saw the other day. some people who I know joined the phandom around that time were talking about how they luckily never experienced that dan vs. phil mentality. that's why I wrote the things before this paragraph based on the assumption that the worst bit of the dannies vs phillies thing was before that era and kind of fizzled out by the time tatinof came around.

thennn the hiatus of the gaming channel, coming out (soulmates etc.), dan disappers from the internet (phil's just always there chilling btw). okay the most interesting part comes now, dan eventually writes a book and goes on tour. alone. now if we look at our hypothesis this would be the perfect reason for people to start disliking him, but not with them. phil goes behind dan's back to promote his book, before dan leaves on tour they make this video (https://youtu.be/2M2dF_21ANc) [edit: this is dilm in case you're wondering] where they keep talking about ohhh we've never apart for longer than to weeks oooh how will we cope blah, disgusting. dan makes a youtube series promoting the tour which phil is heavily involved with. and yeah, dan has this "I'm a strong independent dan" thing going on, but it's mostly part of his tour persona. (and also he did have to figure himself out for himself because he's been attached to phil since he was 18, so literally his whole adult life.)

I know some people disliked dystopia daily (which is valid but just for the record, I will defend her with my life) and I know some people generally didn't like/were disappointed with what dan was doing during that era. however. I know that's not representative of the whole phandom and I don't think (look at me assuming things again) those people truly hated dan for it but more like wished that things were different.

and then and then! after the tour nothing...until *drumroll* the gaming channel is back! aka, phil pushed dan to start making dapg videos again and dan's actually enjoying it. and they're fully embracing their DanAndPhil brand again. tl;dr I think the reason why this divide isn't there between them is [because of] how vocally and explicitly they support each other.

THE END

if you've made it this far, congrats, you get a cat! ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

I genuinely meant what I said earlier, I would love to hear more "qualified" opinions on this! feel free to add to this post, completely unravel it...or ignore it if I was too offensively wrong about things :)

[moenxs]

I hope you feel better! What sort of things do you feel are rampant in the rpc? Do you think they are things that are easy to improve?

oooh boy now THIS is definitely going under a read more because the yapping i'm about to do....

Let me start off by saying a lot of things "wrong" with the rpc are easy to improve as a whole but much harder to improve individually since really a lot of this comes down to individuals and a "vocal minority" in a sense.

I think there's a lot of underlying elitism as a whole in the rpc whether its purposeful or just a byproduct of existing on this site. And a lot of this also results in a very "cliquey" vibe that stretches across every fandom. Now I'm not saying that having a friend group that you tend to prioritize a bit is bad, we all do that, i mean going out of your way to exclude people that try to extend a conversation of interacting, especially if you happen to be mutuals with them.

And I get that OOC interactions can be a little rough especially when social interactions can be hard for people, but if that's the case, then why be mutuals with someone if you're either not going to reach out first, OR interact with them at all if THEY reach out first? Idk that whole thing is just frustrating to me and I think that it's something that definitely needs to be improved on as a whole.

This next thing is just a little more personal and to some people i might sound like I'm whining but it's genuinely an issue with roleplay as a whole and not really just on tumblr.

The topic of a strange aversion to female characters, and OCs. And particularly female OCs. I talked about this with a mutual briefly earlier and they helped me feel a little better about speaking up on this. To be blunt, it still sucks to be an OC writer on tumblr, especially if it happens to be a female OC (don't even get me started on female CANONS though lmao that's a whole other convo-) and especially if you're not really "popular" within the rpc already.

I quite literally have one of my blogs on a momentary hiatus because he was getting a little too much attention. Meanwhile it was nearly crickets here at one point, and I won't lie it does hurt quite a bit. But I'm not going to blame everyone entirely, people have their preferences and that's understandable.

As someone who is a cis woman, i started out on tumblr writing female OCs, and slowly when i found myself getting more comfortable writing male OCs I also found myself getting more consistent interactions. It felt like people were actually getting excited to write with me. And younger me was loving it! I didn't even realize anything was weird as I eventually transitioned over to just writing male OCs entirely for a time. Female OCs still existed on my blog but they were collecting dust.

It wasn't until recently (post 2020 ish) that i really dived back into my female characters and it was around that that I had started to notice the trend as well. I dedicated myself to female OCs in particular and I noticed a pretty steep decline in interactions as a whole. Yea, maybe you can say it was a coincidence until I started writing a male OC again and things steadily increased once again.

Also, I dearly love interacting with other people's OCs, wholeheartedly so. But who wouldn't want to interact with a canon character as well? Other OC writers are extremely welcoming, I've rarely found someone that actively writes OCs more often than not that's not sweet as can be (there are exceptions but i won't get into that).

I've noticed though that (not all obviously but it's definitely a chunk) a decent bit of the elitism that I mentioned before comes from these canon writers. The ones that are "popular" and are actually well known in the space, while most can be just as nice, there's that "vocal minority" that can easily leave quite a bad taste in your mouth.

Like i said, it's a pretty vocal minority. Most if not all of my mutuals that write canons are absolutely not in this category. But still there are some that-

this is going to sound so bad but i promise it's not it's just that i cannot find a better way to word this-

Make me as an OC writer, idk, feel lesser? Like if i'm not one of their close friends that also happens to write an OC it feels more like it's simply an obligation to try and write with me than it is a mutual "excitement" i guess.

I don't know, it's just that even with some mutuals, there's a lack of mutuality and sometimes it makes me wonder why we're even mutuals. Maybe that's just a bit of insecurity talking but honestly at this point it's just incredibly frustrating than it is disheartening anymore.

Like, I do not care how slow you are as a writer, I would just be happy with some sort of reciprocation OOC???? I don't know if that sounds entitled, I know people have busy lives but to see people boasting about ships or plots that theyve been talking about with other people when I've been trying actively to plot with them or even just converse with them is also now more frustrating than disheartening these days lol.

ANYWAYS HAHA

yea that sure was a yap session and a half, I don't know how many of you will make it to this point but if you did thank you so much for hearing me out and hopefully I didn't really offend anyone that badly at any point LMAO

[lingeronyourhazeleyes]

thanks for your tags on that nowhere boy post! I'm so curious what your thoughts are on the movie. When did you first see it? Are you a John girl? What are your thoughts on Mimi and Julia?

aww thank you for this ask 🥰🥰 (and i'm terribly sorry, i'm gonna leave a wall of text here, cuz I just can't resist the opportunity to yap about my Beatles-related experiences and opinions xd)

first of all, i don't really get why this movie tends to get so much hate (aside from the part where John hits Paui, and i really liked your insight that it was necessary to make the subsequent hugging and crying on each other's shoulders less gay - god i hate you late 2000's), because tbh this is my favourite Beatles biopic. Aaron Taylor-Johnson captures John's whimsical spirit quite well imo and even though Thomas Brodie-Sangster wouldn't have been my first choice for Paul, he's really good at being a charming motherfucker and a lil shit at the same time :D

i think i saw it for the first time in my late teens/early 20s with my mom and her husband, but i didn't pay much attention to the details then (given that i only had a very surface level of Betales-knowledge back then). I rewatched it last November though (in the midst of a full-blown Beatles brainrot).

Am i a John girl? Huh, i guess i'm something that people around here would call a John-coded Paul girlie xd nevertheless I aspire to be a Ringo in the lives of my loved ones

And omg your last question led me very far, but I'll try to be brief (edit: i failed lol) :D so, as i read your notes, i was very surprised that it's considered an anti-Julia and pro-Mimi film (and seeing the points you have raised, now i can totally understand why). For me (even on my first viewing) it was never a Julia vs. Mimi thing. I've read it as a John vs John conflict (and this is the point where i start talking bullshit and/or total banalities. Feel free to correct me or argue with my points :D i always fancy a good argument). I've always seen him as a man with two conflicting sides: one is the whimsical, creative, free but overly emotional (consequently kinda unintegrable (i'm not sure if it's a real word lmao i hope it is :D) into modern western society) side (enabled by Julia), and the other one is the abandoned little boy who only wants to be loved, and is therefore ready (or even needs) to be controlled and steered in "the right direction" by others, hoping that they would not abandon him this way (and this side of him is fed by Mimi in a way in my opinion).

In my reading, both mother figures embodied and enabled one side of John, while actively trying to suppress or outright hurt the other side -- as, I think, John did in his own mind, constantly berating and hurting himself in the process. I thought Julia was so antagonistic (and i guess i was waaay more forgiving of her than i think an average person would be, because unfortunately in many ways her behaviour reminded me of myself), because imo society tends to frown upon overly emotional, somewhat detached and destructive, but free-spirited and creativity-enhancing behaviour, while supporting Mimi's "behave according to unspoken social rules and expectation, don't change the status quo, and suppress your emotions"-mindset, that she represented in the movie and tried to instil in John. (Seeing Mimi handle (and making John handle!!) Uncle George's death with coldness and complete suppression of emotions was just as painful and infuriating for me as the scene where Julia sent John away after all the (sometimes creepily inappropriate) lovebombing.) I have a theory that Paul was so important to John because he not only accepted but straight-up embraced (dare i say served) both sides of him. But probably i just see too much into all this xd

Sorry for the long, messy (and probably borderline meaningless) reply 🫣 i happened to have waaaaaay too many thoughts 😭😭