#i wrote this up and nearly deleted it before going like ‘post it you coward’ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

carletes · 3 years ago

Note

hibi, i just got fucked in the ass by united airlines and lost two flights. pls give me your best sewis headcannons, just to change things up ;)

i'm listening to love drought by beyonce and in my sewis feels so let's fucking GO, you get a drabble. Semi-related to this.

If I wasn't me, would you still feel me? Like on my worst day? Or am I not thirsty, enough? I don't care about the lights or the beams Spend my life in the dark for the sake of you and me Only way to go is up, skin thick, too tough

After Abu Dhabi, Lewis cut himself off from the world. Seb caught him for those few moments, touching his elbow, his arm, nearly his face before he caught himself, before he realized he couldn't belong to Lewis there, where the cameras were on them. And Lewis looked at him, smiled at him, his eyes filled with more pain than Seb thought he could bear, so Seb didn't bear it. He should have kissed him, taken his face, stolen him away to safety, god damn the world, but he didn't, and he knew in that moment he wouldn't be a part of whatever Lewis decided to do next.

And so he wasn't. He got one text from Lewis:

- I'm sorry. I'll be back. I think.

And Seb knew he deserved it. Still, he agonized. Still, he wrote whole recollections of his day in text messages every night before bed. Still, his thumb hovered over the send button, and still he deleted the draft.

Even in honesty, he was a coward. But if he was truthful, especially in honesty, he was a coward. Not like Lewis.

Lewis demanded courage. Lewis was courage. Lewis was honesty, and in his face, Sebastian motherfucking Vettel was a coward.

It would be just and right if Lewis never spoke to him again, never loved him again, never warmed his nights and his mornings ever again, Sebastian would consider, sipping darkly on whiskey. He knew he looked terrible: hair disheveled, unshaven, unkempt, unkept. Lewis would have fixed him. Like he fixed so much else. Like he tried to fix what didn't want to be fixed.

Except Seb wanted to be fixed. Except he wouldn't be fixed.

He smashed the tumbler against the ground. It felt good for a moment. Then he thought about how Lewis would have made fun of him, and he cleaned up the mess with his own hands. He cut his thumb open and laughed. He felt better.

Other things happened in the interim, in the Silence. But he remembered little of it until he went to Sweden and felt alive even before the racing had begun. At one point he even sent Lewis a picture of Mick drunk off his goddamn arse. There was no reply.

But there was a read receipt.

Lewis never had his read receipts on.

And Seb realized he must have turned them on.

And he realized he didn't want to believe that, for fear he was wrong, for fear he was crazy. So he didn't believe it.

So he joined Mick and got shit-faced the night before a race, like he would have never done for Formula 1, and it felt fucking good, even if he woke up with the stupidest hangover imaginable. He didn't want to reach for his phone. So he didn't, just blindly shoved it into his back pocket as he brushed his teeth and trudged his way towards the nearest freezing cold body of water.

"Did you see?" Mick asked, the young sprout not looking any worse for wear. He wouldn't; Corinne would chew Seb out once she caught wind, not her boy.

"I can barely see you right now," Seb mumbled, but he couldn't stop the smile on his face. Mick brought that out in him.

"Struggling, old man?" Mick grinned, then dodged a swipe. "Anyway, Lewis is back."

Sebastian stopped in his tracks. He stared at Mick, uncomprehending. The spit of Corinne, Mick was, Seb realized dully. Mick faltered, then supplied, "His Instagram. He posted a picture. That's good, right?"

"Tell the others I'll be late," Seb said even as he turned away from Mick to return to his room.

"Wait- where are you-"

But Seb ran, didn't try looking until he was alone in his room, his back against his door, and then he whipped out his phone and-

- I'm ready.

Seb stared. Then he grinned. Then he laughed, and he punched the air, and he nearly smashed his head through the door with joy, but instead he sent back:

- Switzerland?

Read. Read. And then the three dots, and Seb couldn't stop grinning.

- Yeah. Smash ROC.

- Smash the fucking season.

- That's the plan. Thanks for waiting.

- I have a lot of forgiveness to ask.

- Do I?

- Never you, Lewis.

- Okay. Switzerland.

- Switzerland.

And then Seb threw his phone on the bed, opened the door, and didn't stop running until he was fully submerged and exulting in near-hypothermia. Whatever happened, even if he wasn't a part of it, Lewis was back. And that made Seb's world that much better.

#hibi writes #sewis #sewis fic #f1 rpf #sebastian vettel #lewis hamilton

37 notes · View notes

thattimdrakeguy · 5 years ago

Note

I notice you don't have a Damian tag yet going through your posts You have more posts that are about him than Dick or any other of the batkids not named Tim? You claim to be a Tim Blog but i find it disingenuous that you have nearly as many posts about Damian as you do Tim and most of them are you being negative or making errors. If you were genuine you would have a Damian tag instead of hiding your negative content like a coward. It's okay not to like a character but be truthful.

You gave me three asks that are entirely filled on the kind of petty bias that you continued to imply that I have in all three of the asks.

If you think I’m a coward for not wanting to offend Damian fans with my opinions that are negative based on the bad writing the character has suffered,

then quite honestly, I don’t really have anything to say about it.

I can really only say the fact I got told not to tag him in those types of posts, because people in the Damian tag didn’t appreciate it (with understanding reason), and how it was also because the Damian fan base is the only fan base I ever got nasty sounding asks continuously for criticizing his writing. Even in posts where I criticize the writing for all of the Bat-Family members, or at least the male Robins, Damian’s fan base was the only one I ever got nasty asks from. So I learned through experience it wasn’t a good idea to tag him in those posts.

I presume a lot of them assume I hate him worse then what I actually say because I’m a Tim fan and Tim fan-blog, that seems to be the same case for you going off of how you word yourself as well.

Which I typically find a bit odd seeing how in a few of those very same posts (like the latest one I’m assuming you’re upset at me for) I talk about how he was actually one of my favorite characters when I was first getting into the comics, and don’t actually talk any ill-intended speech towards the character.

I only criticize the writing the character has been dealt much the same I did Tim through-out Detective Comics Rebirth.

I am in no way a hypocrite if that’s what you’re believing.

My blog got popular for openly criticizing how so many different writers had difficulty writing Tim in the same away I just did it for Damian.

and only once did I ever get shit from a person for making many posts about how I couldn’t stand Tim’s writing in Detective Comics Rebirth, while also using a much more exaggerated way of speaking because it meant a lot more to me, and that one person is some one who became my friend literally by the end of the day because even though we didn’t agree on anything, I thought they were a really cool person to talk to.

But you don’t seem like that kind of person, you seem like a person that couldn’t read the full posts, and if you did, could only read them through a veil of “Oh another Tim fan hates Damian” without actually paying attention to how I spoke about him, how I said he had potential and how I enjoyed his initial character development, and that I’m only upset that they kept dropping the ball with him.

Like how I complained about Tim in Rebirth, Tim Drake, my favorite character, and blog theme.

I don’t talk about how Damian is a bad character or how I hate him.

I talk about how it upsets me writers continuously can’t write him well.

Like how I do Tim.

So again, don’t imply I’m a hypocrite.

–

In your second ask you talk about how Tim should’ve trusted Damian because he saved him from Jason when Jason tried to kill him, and how Tim fans are the only ones that can’t see how he was a jackass to Damian.

I’m gonna have to assume you used this wording because of how I worded Tomasi’s out of character writing for Tim, as making Tim a jackass just for the sake of making Damian more likable and sympathetic.

I meant saying jackass by how Tomasi wrote Tim to be rude-via-the-mouth to Damian for no good reason, and I considered it out of character because Tim was never like that before. Previously Tim’s behavior towards Damian was untrusting, even in some situations to the point of it being a flaw, much like that time he tackled Damian because Tim believed he was hurting Alfred, something spawned from how Damian previously locked Alfred in a closest.

You don’t seem to recognize that Damian tried to murder Tim, how he belittled Tim, and how he tried to take his adopted dad away from him because he wanted that spot though.

Even how after he saved Tim: Damian belittled Tim some more as Tim was having a mental breakdown.

Counting the score, Tim has more reasons to not trust him then to actually trust him.

Which only got proved more with how Damian reacted when he found out Tim didn’t trust him. By assaulting him and nearly killing him by cutting his zip-line. (Although you could argue if you wanted too that he knew Tim could land well enough to survive, I personally don’t hold an opinion on it because it’s hard to tell, but I’m going to assume he wasn’t going to kill him, or else the whole issue would have even more bad writing in it)

My point is that it was horrendous writing to pretend like Damian couldn’t recognize why Tim didn’t trust him. Especially when he’s on a list (from what I heard) with Superman.

You criticize me for not bringing up Damian saving Tim, but you continue to ignore quite a lot of the things I said in the actual post I’m assuming you’re mad at.

Don’t be a hypocrite, especially when you’re trying to imply I am one.

If I wanted too, I could right now say “Damian fans are the always the ones that are so biased that they can’t realize Damian has continuously done horrendous and creepy stuff like make fun of Stephanie’s boobs and assaulting Tim, and even later Jason”, and going off of your asks (I won’t say you, because I’m assuming I don’t know you),

I think it would apply to your asks.

But I’m smart enough to know not every Damian fan is like that, so don’t claim otherwise. Every fan base has it’s toxic wasteland, but don’t try to lump me into Tim’s toxic wasteland because I don’t agree with you. You’re only making it seem like you’re apart of the Damian toxic wasteland with your behavior.

–

The third ask keeps going on talking about how they personally find no personal problem with characters calling Damian cute, purely because the asker finds Damian cute themselves.

Think about it though, why would they find Damian cute?

He’s violent, mean-spirited, has attacked both Tim and Jason, Dick has witnessed this, has a prison that Jason is aware of, made sexual comments towards Stephanie, and presents himself in a way where he thinks he’s better than everyone and demands respect.

That’s not cute, and that’s how his character was built up to be (not the prison, that’s a recent thing), and so far has continued to be the majority of those things.

He’s not a cute character.

To portray a character like that as cute is disingenuous (stealing the word you used, because I liked it) and piss poor writing because it’s ignoring the obvious reality. It just gets even worse because Damian wasn’t originally ever portrayed as a cute character, it’s something writers later on did because they couldn’t be bothered to write him well. Dropping the ball down the stairs with his character, and letting his character down.

Some artists might draw him cute because they aren’t aware of how a 13 year old looks, or could even keep consistent with how he looked for so long (even some of the ones that’s drawn him before began to draw him differently because they stopped being able to bother or whichever reason they have), and even some writers might write him cute, but if you’re going to bring that up to me, than I genuinely don’t think you read my full post, only furthered by how you’re trying to imply I’m a hypocrite by how I think 90s Tim was cute and tiny (something the asker did in their third ask).

The difference is pretty much the whole point in the grand majority of my posts were I’m critical about any writer on any character: they changed the character, because either they were too lazy, or too un-knowledgeable about who they were writing, and it’s bad writing to do so, since it’s inconsistency.

If you were watching a TV show and all of a sudden they treated a mean-spirited character, who continuously treats the majority of characters like crap, and continues to struggle with not acting on the instincts they was raised to have, as if that was cute when they haven’t done that before, and none of the characters have a reason to call him cute out of no where, it would be considered bad writing, articles would be written about it, and fans would be ticked off about it.

I’m pretty sure the comics only get away with it because it’s comics, and no one really cares about comics anymore to talk about it. I’m just pointing out the bad writing I continuously see on my blog were I talk about comics because I care and I heavily enjoy the medium of comics.

If it bugs you that I do that, you honestly shouldn’t be on my blog, and I’m a little confused how you got here since you seem aware I’ve brought up Damian’s bad writing before.

and if you want me to explain why I freely call Tim tiny, it’s because he is, and that’s been a main-stay of his character since the very beginning, and only changes with bad artists. Meaning that’s how he’s always been (ignoring the bad artists again), so there’s no bad writing involved with it, it’s actually bad work to ignore that. So it doesn’t fall into any bad or lazy writing like with Damian. It’s simply just not the same thing. If anything it’s the exact opposite if you want to compare those two things, like you seem zealous to do.

If you failed to recognize my logic, I’m going to have to assume again that you haven’t read or at least paid attention to things I’ve said, or how I generally try to conduct my points on my posts.

–

Continuously throughout your three asks you try to make points that make no sense.

The main reason I haven’t just blocked you and deleted your asks is because I get the vibe that you aren’t typically a very mean-spirited person, you’re just impulsive and passionate towards a character, and that is fine, but it’s when when you try to put down what someone else has said, when you seem like you haven’t even read the full thing, or have at least tried to fully pay attention to it, that it becomes toxic behavior, and something I have a problem with.

I believe it was just yesterday I got an ask were someone was complaining about the same kind of person that you presented yourself to be to me. So maybe this whole time this was only a joke to get under my skin because someone read that ask and my response and decided to pull a prank.

You may be a child, and so because of how you speak in the asks, mainly the latter two, I chose to just describe them instead of show them because I’m gonna take it that after some years you might look back on this and how weirdly aggressive you were towards people, and be glad that I didn’t show the ones were you try your dang best to point stuff out about me like it’s honest and true, and like you did your research about me, when quite frankly it’s not and you haven’t, even if you were trying to gaslight me, and use some straw man arguments to provoke me.

Also since you may be a child, a lot of Damian fans are since he’s Robin and the most recent one, I’m going to let you know that I’m honestly not mad at you for the asks, just confused, and that I wish you well and hope that I didn’t make you so mad that you’ve been thinking about it all day.

I’m just being critical of a character who I’m disappointed hasn’t had good writing consistently for years.

I’m not attempting to make the character come off like they’ve been bad since the beginning.

So you don’t have to worry about it.

I’m just genuinely upset with his writing, the same way I’m upset with how Tim’s been written before.

If you’re a grown person though, I’m a little more disappointed, but all the same, I hope I didn’t ruin your day, because to let you know, you haven’t ruined mine.

#Discourse

35 notes · View notes

japrilforthewin · 7 years ago

Text

Hello lovely anon,

I accidentally deleted your ask, sorry this reply took forever 😘

To be clear, I still love the real Jackson, but you wanted to know my reasons for "hating" Kristas Jackson (let's call him Krackson):

* He started to fall for his stepsis because she reminds him of before child loss and soulcrushing grief April, while he was still sleeping with and living with April. April, who was ready to die for his children (hell she was ready to die for Jackson in 9x24), his person, best friend and his ONE (Jackson said it, not me). Even after she was there for him in a deep way in Montana.

* He knows how much sex meant to April, so yeah it does seem like he used her for casual sex. At least he let April believe it which is bad enough. He just sat there, like a spineless coward, not saying a word when she was crying and pouring her heart out. I don't think it was noble for him to let her move out without saying a word, hell no.

* He laughed at his only father figure dying. (Oh but then they realized it wasn’t nice to dance on a loved ones grave, so watch them ruin Harper’s character even post mortem by turning him part of a #metoo hashtag).

* He inherited a ton of money and went out on a tacky shopping spree and started a competition solely to serve his own ego. The Jackson I know and love would have at least also donated money towards OI research for example. He would have done something selfless. Maybe set up a scholarship fund for disadvantaged black youth with dreams of going to med school?

* He was more interested in screwing his stepsis than helping his person while she was fucking drowning right in front of him. I disagree with the retcon writing that had April claim he was there for her when she felt like God left. Krackson doesn’t deserve April and his actions are the definition of too little too late. In fact, I am disappointed that the bar in general is set so low for men on this show. Because representation does matter.

* He tried to get his stepsis to date him by bragging about how rich he is. Douche.

* He called Maggie his sister (as did his mom) in one episode and fucked said sister in another. Their first stepsex after an eternity of buildup (in the slutty GA world at least), happened on a couch in a dark blur after the childish, self absorbed, dignity impaired Maggie (to be fair Krackson doesn't have much dignity either) came begging for an apology in the middle of the night, AFTER Jackson shamelessly admitted he didn’t tell her because he was protecting April, which means April is more important to him. Despite that, the desperate overdog Maggie chose to jump him. We’re supposed to ship that chemless, stepcest mess? What a joke, just like this show is now.

* He seems shallow and mute this season (except when it comes to defending stepcest and kiss Maggie's ass). Krista erased many years of character growth. Sure, we've seen glimpses of the real Jackson this season (loved the police bias episode), but far from enough. He's more or less reduced to a pretty rich boy Maggie prop, which is tragic considering he has been through so much tragedy, worked so hard, is nearly 40, is a father who was abandoned by his father as a child, is an accomplished surgeon and head of the GSM board. I often feel like it's a completely different character than Jackson when Jesse Williams says his lines now. It's clear that most of the current writers don't understand or respect Jackson as a character. (Lmao at some thinking women can't objectify men, just look at the GA writer room). I hate that my long term absolute FAVOURITE character is being demolished.

I curse the day Shonda hired Krista the serpent's incompetent, biased and arrogant self and it's sad that K wrote the exit of the extraordinarily beautiful soul that is April Kepner. At this point, I’m actually relieved Sarah is leaving. Cagney and Lacey, here I come. Now I wish nothing but demise for Grey’s Anatomy.

Before I go ladies..let me give you some advice ❤

Set the bar high for the men in your life. Trust and believe with your whole heart that you deserve so much more than some pretty but shallow Ken doll. (Just pretty gets really old really fast).

Never, ever, settle for being the second choice or the rebound. You deserve more than to be plan B. Jackson clearly likes Maggie and she is a safe comfort for him because she doesn’t have the power to hurt him. You know why?

Because Jackson is in love with April, not Maggie.

Sadly, it's likely that as long as Krista the showruiner stays, so will Krackson. Honestly? Maggie can have him.

Japril already won.

#japril #jackson avery #can't wait for may 17 cause it's get out of ga jail day woohoo #boycottgreysanatomy

106 notes · View notes

stargleeksil-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Criminal Minds s04e12 Soul Mates review - or more aptly named, the episode where Shemar acted for his life and I nearly shed a tear at his passion. FUCK.

Episode 12 – Soul Mates

Hey guys! So last episode was definitely a doozy in the weirdest way possible, and ended up with me freaking out in an embarrassing way. Lol.

This title has my filthy mind going in whichever direction you can possibly think.

Let’s see what happens.

Oh my god, Sarasota is so pretty.

Oh I love this actress!!! I’m horrible with remembering where they are from … it’s 2008 in there, give me a break! Oh my god! That’s Chastity from the series of ’10 Things I Hate About You’! COOL!

Oh this girl is well-informed, good girl!

Wait. They’re arresting her dad? What the hell?

Wait. They’re seriously suspecting him? SHIT.

Oh fuck. Even my superheroes suspect this guy? Then he must have done something wrong.

Sigmund Freud: “No mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips. Betrayal oozes out of him at every pore.” Yikers. And people wonder why he’s considered a freak.

I love how Matthew reads the excerpt. So into it. I love it!

Why is Jordan still here? I thought JJ was back? FUCK YOU JORDAN!

Sorry. Still resentful she bitched at my baby.

Oh god, that breast pocket is doing things to me on that pectoral. Fuck.

“We have a witness who can place you at the mall the same time of her abduction.”

Oh damn.

“And, uh, well, rumor has it that you seem to have a history of this type of behavior.”

WHAT?

Derek is judging you.

Not a good place to be.

Whoa. Those women are fierce. I love them.

“Give me a minute, I will find the grime.”

You go, girl.

“I’m always in control, sweet cheeks.”

Sweetie, that’s poodle you’re talking to, not hot stuff.

“Yeah, just because you delete your history, it doesn’t mean all your dirty cyberlaundry isn’t hanging out there for me to find on your hard drive.”

“Rookie mistake.”

Wait. Did he just tell them to put up the house for bail money? Where would they go? Dummy.

“She found an encrypted link to a web page.”

“Where did it take you?” You can see the Shemar part of the brain going ‘porn, porn, porn’

“An unsearchable, untraceable blog with tons of journal entries. It’s like some sort of diaries.”

“I was able to differentiate between two distinct voices, two authors.”

Now that’s weird.

“I found various idiosyncratic words, phrases, punctuation, and orthography within the blog entries consistent with each separate person – words like ‘soda’ and ‘pop’. One guy uses dashes while the other uses ellipses.”

Aw, my poodle giggled.

“Where’d you find this kid?”

“He was left in a basket on the steps of the FBI.”

Oh my freaking goodness, Rossi is killing me over here.

“One side of the discourse made a reference to the devil’s strip.”

“What the hell is that?”

“Uh, it’s a small patch of grass that separates the sidewalk from the street.”

What?

“Now, that term is only used in central Ohio.”

“William lived in Atlanta for twenty years, but he grew up in Columbus.”

Dang. My baby is good.

“Kid, you sure about this?”

Reid’s bitch face gives me life.

“Right.”

The found Missy.

Detective! What the fuck?

Dead. They found her dead.

Damn. It wasn’t fucking William. Shit.

Wait. The wife is in on this? Oh damn.

Calculating poodle is the best poodle you can kanoodle with.

“Tell me you found his partner.”

Yes, please.

“It’s all so cryptic.”

Well, that’s not good.

Look at my two gorgeous men at work.

“Well, they clearly enjoyed being together.”

“They wrote a cluster of others right after the first victim, Kim Groves, was killed.”

Oh boy.

“We need to figure out how they met. There’s gotta be something in all this about their courtship.”

Hold the fucking phone, Shemar said courtship.

That’s one of the sexiest words out there, and he just said it.

I’m dead.

“He didn’t start killing until he met his soul mate.”

Yikes.

Talk about the devil on your shoulder.

“Sounds like these two aren’t just obsessed with rape and murder. They’re addicted to one another.”

You know, the higher Shemar’s vocabulary and expression is in this series, the hotter he is? Fuck.

They had me reeled in when he said the word ‘love’ and I’m hooked now he’s said ‘courtship’.

And of course ‘soul mate’.

“The partner is a biter.”

Kinky.

“They never did that before.”

Damn.

“DA was ready to charge him when Missy was still alive. How the hell are we supposed to keep him now?” damn.

“I’m surprised you’re writing all this stuff to a fella. Sounds like you have a real special thing going on.”

Wait, so now they think he’s having an affair with a dude? Cuz I’m pretty sure it’s the wife.

“I mean, I’m thinking if the two of you had just got it on, maybe these women would still be alive.”

“So where’d you meet him? Chat room? Porn sites? Gay bar?”

Oh honey, you’re biting up the wrong ass.

“Whoever this guy is, he’s looking out for you, cleaning up for you.”

“I wanna know why your pen pal killed her when he could have let her rot.”

“Wow, this friend of yours wants to please you bad, doesn’t he?”

What do they got, William?

“Proof that someone out there is just as sick as you.”

Hell yeah.

“It turns out there’s a lot of sick pups in central Florida.”

Well, I’m keeping out of there.

“So we’re looking at two dominant personalities.”

Damn.

“Makes sense. They have similar discourse. They’re equally well-written.”

Can I just say? I love it when Reid uses the word ‘discourse’ so academic and rare.

“These men are addicted to each other.”

Oh damn. So they’re using that to lure the fucker out? Good.

So it’s not the wife like I thought.

Okay.

“A betrayal could devastate him.”

Oh boy.

“All we have to say is that William’s cooperating, and then hope he takes the bait.”

I hope so.

Sounds like the dude is rather frisky.

Wait. His wife posted bail? Oh god.

“Partner made the first move. He’s the one with the balls.”

Whoa, there, Rossi.

“Yeah, and it was pretty risky, too. Think about it. What if you did turn in here? Or at least your partner thought you turned in here? Then he’d have no choice but to turn himself in. Your lives would be ruined.”

“That’s the reason it works. You both have everything to lose.”

“He’s only cleaning up because he can’t afford to get caught either.”

“How is he gonna react to the entry we wrote?”

Oh god, they’re goading him. I love those two.

“William, you wrote, ‘thanks for the perfect place to play’.”

“What were you talking about?”

Golfing. Right.

“What was it like?”

Hey! I know the white guy! God, I love that actor too.

Oh god, I love the guest stars they’re casting.

Oh god, I can’t handle hot people sitting on furniture that is so obvious you can fuck on. Shit. Now I’m having dirty desk sex fantasies.

“Not an ounce of sincerity.” Damn.

What’s going on?

Aw, see, now that’s just sad.

“It’s been so long, my heart aches.”

“I need to see that face again soon.”

Oh god, Shemar reading out love letters is too much.

“Sounds more like two men in love with each other.”

Let’s see how this unfolds.

“I have absolutely no idea what it’s like to be in love with another man.”

Well, now it’s been confirmed that Derek is straight. Yay for me.

“Now who’s the one who has no idea what he’s talking about?”

Damn straight. William can shut up about my baby, he has no idea what happened to him.

“First of all, I am not your boy.”

Oh shit.

“And this look on my face is a look of contempt, because you disgust me.”

“You and I are nothing alike.”

Oh and just so we’re clear, it’s obvious that Derek’s disgust isn’t about the homosexuality part, am I right? It’s so obvious it’s because they kill people. I mean, ugh.

That daughter is one smart cookie.

“I feel like such an outsider, no one understands me. I watch them chase their little spawns, the same old conversation. Nothing stimulates me.”

Ew.

“Sounds like a party with kids.”

Double ew.

“I looked across the room, and everything changed. The only spark in my day. It feel so good, so free, so right.”

You know, if he took the contempt out of his voice, I would be a melting puddle right now.

“You know what you are? You’re lost.”

Wait, now he’s trying a different tactic? Oh boy.

“I think you’ve been running from yourself your entire life, trying to disappear.”

“What’d you think you were gonna do, man? What, if you got away from Atlanta, all these little urges, they’d just go away?”

“So you go find another posh little uppity neighborhood, and you think it might make you feel al little better about yourself?”

Oh god, Derek said posh. I can’t.

“But then you wake up one day, and there he is, somebody just as sick and pathetic as you are, and your whole world changes.”

Is this all about that black comment? Seriously, dude? You think Derek is that weak?

“You really think that we’re the same because of our skin color?”

“You hurt innocent people. I don’t.”

“You’re not even a man.”

Yup.

“I’m a serial killer writing to my partner.”

Never.

They never write about a time.

“So how’d they know when to meet?”

Oh boy. How?

“Other than the blog, there is nothing else suspicious on Mr. Sneaky’s phone or his computer.”

I love her nicknames. So pure.

Shit. They used songs to give signals? Oh boy.

Good girl, Garcia.

Shit. Andrea followed Steven because she was suspicious, and now the fucker got her. Shit.

“No, Steven Baleman is not just your neighbor.”

“And you know this, how?”

“You told us.”

Yup.

Oh good girl. She didn’t post bail.

Love you, lady.

Oh god, those two taunting William about his daughter is seriously freaking me out and turning me on at the same time. Shit.

“Your little boyfriend is twisted, and now he’s got your baby girl.”

Uh-oh, he brought out the special nickname.

“What, is nothing sacred to you?”

Yup. Nothing.

“Man, turn around and look at me!”

Yeah, you coward.

“What is wrong with you, man?”

Oh god, Derek angry is freaky and hot.

“Why aren’t you trying to run out that door and save your child?”

“He’s alone with your little girl.”

Oh my god, Derek just turned emotional. The most emotional I’ve ever seen him in an interrogation room, holy mother of all that is sacred. Fuck.

“She’s probably crying out for you.”

“Daddy.”

Oh my god, look at his expressive face!!!!!!!

“Why aren’t you helping me?

“Why, because you’re standing here, doing nothing.”

Oh shit, he just spat! Oh my god, that is one amazing performance. Fuck.

“Be a man. For god sakes, be a father.”

Oh god. This man is amazing.

Why did they let him go to get his daughter? I’m not following.

Oh god, how the fuck can he actually stand there and talk to this fucker? If I were a parent, I would have strangled him and got my daughter out of there.

Oh they bugged him. Good.

“Those two had everything figured out.” “Except how it would end.”

Yup.

C. Northcote Parkinson: “Delay is the deadliest form of denial.” Wow. That is some serious stuff. And I’m so happy Shemar read that out.

Hi? Okay, I am so sorry for the long review, you guys! I didn’t even notice how long it was getting till I reached the last word. I am so sorry! But holy fuck what an episode! At first you’re like, there’s no fucking way it’s the dad, he’s so loving to his daughter, then you’re like – fuck. it’s him. Shit. And then you think his wife is in on it. Turns out he’s killing because he’s repressing his homosexuality and he’s a sick fucker. Then you have Shemar Moore acting for his fucking life and turning me on like a kettle, getting me emotionally involved. Then it was just – holy shit, how can this end so much better? Ah yes, Joe Mantegna was acting with Shemar and it was glorious.

Seriously. One of the best episodes out there, hands down.

Not too bloody. Amazing acting. Emotional. I love it!

Hands down, best season ever.

Can’t wait to see what’s next tomorrow, cuz I have to go to sleep unless I want to accidentally sell guns and murder instead of coffee and machines XD

Good night lovelies…. And yes, I’m writing this while the second season is still posting itself in my queue … oh god. By the time this is posted I’ll be balls-deep in season seven, won’t I? Oh boy.

As ever, thank you so much for your support, folks! It makes my day to hear those tiny ‘pings’ on my gorgeous rose gold Xiaomi phone.

2 notes · View notes

rainstormcolors · 8 years ago

Text

I wrote a short DSoD-based prideshipping fic (with an itty bitty drop of peachshipping), but I wouldn’t call it a romance story. It turns melancholy, I think.

I don’t know what I’m doing, but I guess I’ll post it. Thank you for reading if you choose to.

---

All Seto had left of his mother were memories of memories, scattered like a handful of fading grey stars. Once or twice, Mokuba had asked about her but Seto had nothing to give him. Seto remembered their father a little better, but it was as if those memories had the substance of a fairytale. Neither of his parents would ever know him. What he was. What he would become. That thought had crossed his mind a couple times, but he didn’t really care.

What Seto did remember was loneliness, and wondering why his mother and father had left him.

He remembered his uncle and grandmother telling him this was for his and Mokuba’s own good, and knowing even then they were lying to his face.

There was nothing left inside him to feel as he watched Gozaburo leap from the window to his death.

When did he start to feel things again?

His rival, his friend, the Other Yugi. Suddenly all the passion Seto felt had no place to go, and his head and his heart felt gelatinous.

He’d followed that man across three-thousand years and he’d followed that man to the desert.

The world was split between sand and sky and somehow it felt like another world as Yugi appeared from the temple without the Millennium Puzzle hung from his neck. The truth was Seto had arrived at the temple in time, but he didn’t enter. At that time, he couldn’t have answered why.

It was all a book with no ending, cut abruptly mid-paragraph, mid-sentence.

He told himself he didn’t care, but then in the night for no reason and at nothing he screamed, “Goddamn coward!”

Why did

Why am

It was an obsession. It wasn’t a dark hole but a red hemorrhage. The memory of that man’s face, his voice, the burning colors of his eyes. Like a phantom image every time Seto blinked.

The pod would split his consciousness from his body.

He didn’t care about the risks anymore. The neural signals were balanced and he couldn’t wait any longer. Through the monitor, Mokuba, his young brother, stared at him with concerned eyes.

Seto’s voice bellowed, “Duel dimension system activate!”

What even are you to me?

Atem.

The visits became a weekly ritual. It made it easier for Seto to control his emotions when he was there.

They stood together on the balcony---Seto and the Pharaoh---cupped by the palms of night, gazing across the ancient and candlelit city, the sky like a black ocean.

“Would you say you had a happy life or a sad one up until that point?” Seto asked him.

Atem thought for a moment and then said, “It was mostly happy, with bits of sadness here and there. When I try to remember it's like looking through a fogged window. But it gets clearer the longer I stay here.”

Atem went to sit on the ledge then, facing now towards the dark river. But his eyes remained focused on the man standing beside to him. “My father loved me. I know that very well. He fell ill when he discovered it took a genocide to create the seven Millennium Items, but I can't really remember it myself.” He shut his eyes, and his words were full of warmth. “I’m glad to know him again.”

“... Do they feel like your memories or someone else's?”

“There's no doubt they're mine. But those memories are thousands of years old and for a long time I had forgotten them. But… I feel like I’m home here. I do miss that world and Yugi and my friends, but I feel whole.”

Atem patted next to himself on the ledge, an invitation, and with clumsiness Seto sat. Together, they were quiet.

“Do you mind if I ask you something personal myself?” Atem said.

“Depends.”

“Can I ask you... what your original family name was?”

Seto didn't answer immediately, his face without emotion.

“You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.”

“It doesn't matter. That chapter of my life ended years ago. Those people abandoned Mokuba and me. I have nothing but contempt for that name now.”

“I understand.”

Seto held it for a moment, and then let it go. “... It was .”

Seto understood Atem could’ve found out the answer to this question by himself. Likewise, Seto hadn’t spoken the name in years. Abandoned Mokuba. There was a soft pinprick of pain inside those words.

“Thank you for telling me,” Atem said gently.

Speck by speck, Seto felt his mind slowly returning to his flesh from that paradise.

The way life would unspool like strange music from there, the way time ticked on with such methodic indifference. How every birthday and Christmas he’d be sent avalanches of cards and small gifts from children and fans, and it was a slow and heady realization: he was beloved. It was because he was the best, wasn’t it? No, there was something more innocent going on here.

Mokuba grew taller and took to drinking espresso.

And it was difficult to admit in a way, but Seto enjoyed his partnership with Yugi. Sometimes after working on a rare project together, they’d go and have a coffee. Yugi did most of the chatting, but Seto found it all oddly tolerable. And at some point they began to schedule the occasional coffee meeting without the precedent of work, and sometimes Seto would discover Jonouchi or Anzu had tagged along uninvited.

“So how’s Atem doing?”

Really what Yugi was asking was, “How are you both doing?”

He wasn’t surprised when he was invited to Yugi and Anzu’s wedding, but he was surprised when he was invited to Jonouchi’s and then later to Honda’s. For the latter two, he felt sending a card with a check inside was good enough.

Mokuba fell in love with a waitress at a restaurant he frequented. She was kind, loved books and the rain and she played a violin. They’d been dating for nearly two years when she broke it to him that she was pregnant and without hesitation, the next day Mokuba proposed to her. And it was this gesture that had Seto wondering if maybe he should propose to Atem.

And there was a time, before Mokuba had his son, when Seto met Yugi for coffee and Yugi was somber. There was no light or air in his voice. He stared into his cup as he said the words.

“Anzu had a miscarriage…”

Seto had no idea what to say, no idea what to do. And it baffled him beyond words when, as the two parted ways, Yugi told him softly with complete sincerity, “Thank you.”

Three years later Yugi and Anzu would have a healthy daughter, and as Anzu held her for the first time, for as exhausted and drugged as she was, she felt she never wanted that moment to end.

When Sugoroku Mutou died, the fractured pieces of his soul didn’t reunite. Instead Sugoroku went to be with his wife and family. That’s what Atem said, because somehow he knew. At the time, Seto was glad to know his identity wouldn’t be erased by fusing with that other guy. He didn’t think much else of it.

The moon was out in daytime, a lilac-silver hue. Sitting on a park bench, watching Yugi’s daughter try to push Mokuba’s son on the swing set. It was perhaps the most perfect scene Seto’d ever witnessed. It was the light of life.

Seto was fifty-six now. His trips to Atem’s afterlife were becoming harder on his body. How was it that Atem could look at him the same way now as when they were young? Atem was still so beautiful, all lovely skin, his eyes so alive and violet. It was when Seto hit his late twenties that a small piece of him felt filthy touching Atem’s still-young body.

Seto’d been having flu-like symptoms for a long while then. He had hid them as best he could, from others and from himself. When the truth came it punctured his lungs like a knife.

He sat with Atem on the bank of the river as the world turned indigo. The clouds were spectral, blue, and glassy. A sea bird skimmed the air.

“I have cancer.”

Atem stared at him silently, but Seto looked only to the water.

“The survival rate for the variety I have isn’t favorable. I waited too long.”

“Seto…”

Seto said what came next with a detached sharpness. “Do you know what chemotherapy actually is? They poison you, hoping it will kill the tumor before it kills you.”

Atem’s lips tightened. As he took Seto’s hand, Seto had to fight himself to not rip it away.

Children from across the world sent him get-well cards in rainbow-colored envelopes, but he was too numb to open a single one.

He was spilling: a shattered vase, shattered window, firing employees over nothing, deleting entire projects from his computer when one thing went wrong.

His body had betrayed him. He hated being this way, so weak and helpless. New symptoms arrived each time they switched out his chemotherapy. Mottled heat of nausea, a deep ache in every muscle. He felt his body falling apart, and it chilled him to his barest ether to realize he was absolutely terrified. He was terrified as it became more and more difficult to do the small everyday tasks. He was terrified as he knew Mokuba and Yugi were watching him fall apart. He was terrified he’d never see his husband again. To just pull himself out of bed left him wheezing for minutes, hacking up blots of blood-tinted phlegm.

Atem. Was this feeling anything like what he’d felt, that first time he died? There was no nobility in this.

Seto hadn’t been afraid of death before. He could have killed himself right then and have escaped such humiliating misery. But Mokuba’s family. And then Atem’s afterlife… was it also his afterlife? Both of them had noticed how closed off Atem’s world seemed from other spirits. Seto never did meet his parents there. They would never be anything more than ghosts spinning in his memories. But then he never really wanted to find his parents and he never tried. The person he did want to find was the person he’d been chasing from the start: his husband.

The doctors began feeding Seto a regiment of morphine and would pump the fluids from his lungs with a tube, which was always a piercingly painful process. He had to stop working for Kaiba Corporation. He wouldn’t take Yugi’s calls. He was so tired. It was at that point Seto made his decision.

Mokuba had brought Seto home from the hospital. Seto laid propped up in his bed, his lungs cleaned out and raw, and Mokuba sat in a chair beside him. The shadows of the room were blue.

“I don’t want to do this anymore,” Seto said in a fragile voice.

Mokuba, blank-faced, said nothing to this, an opalescent blade poured across his body from the slit in the window’s curtains.

“I need you to help me with something,” Seto continued.

Mokuba spoke gently. “What is it?”

“Bring me to the space station. If I can’t do it myself, help secure me in the pod.” He breathed in. “Please.”

There was a pause.

“Alright,” Mokuba said.

Seto realized if this worked, he might not see Mokuba or Yugi again. It felt familiar.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.”

Seto almost added, “You deserved better,” but he held those words inside. Instead he said something else. It was something he’d realized a long time ago. “You were always the stronger one between us.”

There was the faintest flicker of a sad smile on Mokuba’s face.

The trip to the station’s base had been quiet. Seto watched the person Mokuba had grown into, memorized every detail he could. A memory floated to the surface, of the day Mokuba announced he was getting married and was going to be a father. And then another one, forty-seven years old. It was a memory of a sandbox.

They had to take the elevator up in shifts. Around them, everything was steel and cold, a grey luster. Mokuba helped to secure his brother inside the pod, a numbness in his fingertips. Seto heaved and hacked into his palm, leaving smears of dark slime.

“Thank you.”

Mokuba gave him a soft, “hmn.”

They stared at each other for a moment. Both sets of eyes were tired.

“Goodbye, Mokuba.”

Something painful stirred in Mokuba’s face, and then he said, “Good luck. Goodbye, Nii-sama.”

He thought of Atem. Atem’s beautiful spirit blazing like a flame inside the glow of his heart. Seto hadn’t been inside the pod since he began chemo, and he didn’t know if he would survive the journey this time. But he had to try. If he was going to spend eternity inside an afterlife, it had to be that afterlife. It had to be with him. This time, if he made it to that clear sparkling otherworld, he wouldn’t be coming back. His heart thumped like a drum the size of a mountain.

He launched the pod, and it was a pure crystalline light which took his hands and lead him somewhere.

#prideshipping #the darkside of dimensions #seto kaiba #fanfiction

68 notes · View notes

newsbiteswithjennysok · 5 years ago

Text

Sept 6, 2019

1. Theo Campbell, known for starring on MTV’s “The Challenge” as well as reality show “Love Island” in the UK, has opened up in depth for the first time about the accident that left him almost completely blind in one eye.

The 28-year-old reality star appeared on Britain’s “This Morning” show Friday, and said that a young woman accidentally popped a bottle of champagne in his direction while on vacation in Ibiza, Spain, causing the injury.

“It’s a very eerie pain,” he said. “I couldn’t open either eye at first, and I just had my hand over [one], and I couldn’t see anything at all. I was stumbling.”

Campbell shared that he was in disbelief for two minutes until he looked down at the hand that was covering his right eye, and saw blood.

“From there, the security grabbed me, they took me to the medical room, and the medic looked at it,” he said, adding that doctors realized he needed to be taken to the emergency room right away.

Campbell said he “in constant pain for the first two days,” even after he had eye surgery.

The former track athlete said he is hopeful that he will heal, but doctors don’t have much hope, and have told him, “You’ll never be able to see the same again. It might be a very long time before you start seeing anything, like, even in a blurry way.”

“But if I look now, I can see light,” Campbell added. “That’s the good part, but I explain it as looking through a stain glass window, because I can see, but everything is a massive blur.”

He posted on Instagram on Aug. 27 that he had been involved in an accident involving a champagne cork and thanked his girlfriend Kaz Crossley for her support.

He is also raising money for charity by running a 10K to support the Cure Blindness foundation.

2. Charlie Sheen has been accused of not paying up.

Sheen’s ex-wife, Denise Richards, claimed in court documents in August that the former “Two and a Half Men” star owes $450,000 in child support for their two daughters, Sam, 15, and Lola, 14, The Blast reported. The “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” star, 48, requested a judge force Sheen, 54, to pay.

“[Charlie] has squandered over $24,000,000 from the sale in his interest in ‘Two and a Half Men’ to pay his personal debts and to support his extravagant lifestyle at the expense of support payments for his children,” read the papers, obtained by the publication.

Richards filed for divorce in March 2005 after nearly three years of marriage. The former couple finalized the process the following year.

The “Drop Dead Gorgeous” actress also claimed Sheen failed to pay the $450,000 and instead diverted “over $600,000 in assets to adult family members and converting thousands of dollars into cash for his own personal use.”

Sheen’s rep had no comment.

Sheen, however, slammed his ex-wife in a statement to The Blast.

“D and her legal posse traffic only in fiction my day in court is painfully overdue,” he said. “She is behaving like a coward and the truth will prevail.”

3. Gym. Tan. Breakup.

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and Jen Harley have reportedly called it quits again after she accused the “Jersey Shore” star of spending time on a boat with another woman over the holiday weekend. Harley, 31, made the allegations via now-deleted Instagram stories.

“Is this love???!! Or is this a mistake??” she captioned a now-deleted photo of what appeared to be Ortiz-Magro, 33, and a woman on a boat. “This is Ron this weekend with another girl again,” she wrote in another story.

She continued the roundup by posting a quote from Shelly Lewis about addiction: “Addiction not only hurts the addict. It hurts the family, kids, friends and the people who try to help them.” Ortiz-Magro completed a 30-day stay in treatment for depression and alcohol abuse earlier this year, and said on a recent episode of “Jersey Shore Family Vacation” that he feels “really good.”

She ended her Instagram story by going after both MTV and Ortiz-Magro by saying: “I’m the one bullied and abused by everyone just bc I don’t post the things that happen to me doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen !! Isn’t it weird you never hear my side?? Bc I don’t need to tell it.”

A source told People that they are indeed “broken up. She’s moved out of the house. Ron wants to focus on his daughter and her well-being.”

4. Demi Lovato wants her fans to know the truth.

The “Sorry Not Sorry” singer, 27, conquered her “biggest fear” when she posted an unedited picture of herself wearing PilyQ’s jungle bandeau top ($76) and matching high-waisted bottoms ($72) on Instagram to show fans what she really looks like without Photoshop.

“This is my biggest fear. A photo of me in a bikini unedited. And guess what, it’s CELLULIT!!!! I’m just literally sooooo tired of being ashamed of my body, editing it (yes the other bikini pics were edited – and I hate that I did that but it’s the truth) so that others think I’m THEIR idea of what beautiful is, but it’s just not me,” she wrote alongside the photo.

“This is what I got.”

Since surviving her near-fatal drug overdose last year, Lovato explained she’s starting a “new chapter” in which she wants to live an “authentic” life instead of caving to Hollywood’s pressures.

“So here’s me, unashamed, unafraid and proud to own a body that has fought through so much and will continue to amaze me when I hopefully give birth one day,” she shared, adding that she’s done committing herself to an unrealistic diet and exercise lifestyle.

“It’s such a great feeling to be back in tv/film while not stressing myself with a strenuous workout schedule before 14 hour days, or depriving myself from a real birthday cake rather than opting for watermelon & whip cream with candles because I was terrified of REAL cake and was miserable on some crazy diet s–t,” Lovato explained.

5. Jeremy Renner is shutting down his app after trolls impersonated the “Avengers: Endgame” star on the platform.

“The app has jumped the shark. Literally,” Renner said in a message posted to the app. “Due to clever individuals that were able to manipulate ways to impersonate me and others within the app I have asked ESCAPEX, the company [that] runs this app to shut it down immediately and refund anyone who has purchased any stars over the last 90 days.”

He added, “What was supposed to be a place for fans to connect with each other has turned into a place that is everything I detest and can’t or won’t condone.”

The 48-year-old actor apologized to his fans and asked that they still connect with him on other social media platforms.

“My sincere apologies for this to have not turned out the way it was intended,” he said. “To all the super-fans who have supported me with your words or encouragement, amazing art, stories and time shared on the app, a genuine THANK YOU and I hope to see you on Instagram, Twitter, YouTube and Facebook.”

Renner launched the app in 2017 to connect with his fanbase and share exclusive content.

0 notes

sincerely-mykhy · 8 years ago

Text

"Who Am I?"

So I found this little poem I wrote couple years ago for my Communications Studies IA under the topic "Social Media". At the time I was so proud of it but I realize my writing style haven't changed much since.

“WHO AM I?”

Depressing thoughts slither through my mind,

Causing despair as I am suffocated by envy.

It wasn’t always like this you see.

I was once a strong spirited soul,

But even the strongest of souls can be broken.

Who am I?

One would probably answer with my name,

But does that describe who I really am? I am-

*ding*

Who am I?

Am I the girl who only has two followers?

Am I the girl whose posts they ignore?

Am I the girl who can’t even get one like?

Am I the girl who they say is simply not “up to par”?

Am I the girl who they unfollow?

Let me tell you something,

Rejection hurts.

We use filters upon filters,

But they will always have something to say,

Always ready to judge but not know a thing.

Cowards.

Do they not know there is someone on the other end?

Or do they think we are robots?

Just like the device they hold in their cold hands,

Through which their strength lies.

One winter home base,

On which they the enemy invades,

Taking your own will away,

As you go seeking for a warm truce of likes,

But once again, you are left frozen.

I wonder,

Is it because I’m not pretty enough?

Is my inner beauty not enough?

I get good grades in school,

Is that too not enough?

They say not to stand in the shadows of someone else.

But that is nearly impossible

When you can’t match up to that “someone else”,

Continuously searching through filters,

While losing yourself.

A social media, making us anti-social,

A world of touch screens,

Now making us lose touch,

Using likes and followers to measure self-worth.

Now why did I succumb to that?

Soulless eyes stare into the camera,

A soul searching to be found,

But continuously,

It is stabbed with neglect,

And now the soul is stuck in a deserted Sahara.

We try to put a filter on humanity,

Instead of taking pictures for memories,

They are taken selfie…shly,

Sucking the life out of others,

With their vanity.

Why not try autocorrecting our lives?

Go back to a time before these sites,

That are claimed to be for socializing,

But are instead silent battlefields

Where only the strongest will survive.

Why do we allow ourselves to be chained by selfies?

Selfies that aren’t truly capturing the self,

Yet, this is the image that we want them to double tap.

An empty image that supposedly holds our beauty,

When true beauty lies within the self.

“Fleek”,

A word that has brainwashed the minds of many,

As we strive to be “up to standards”,

To those who personalities aren’t “on fleek”,

But yet their attention is what we seek.

Social media is our greatest friend and our worst enemy,

Degrading ourselves only to think we are upgraded by others,

Continuously seeking attention to satisfy our self-integrity,

Asking people to follow our Instagram,

Slaving over pages that we wish could be placed on our resume.

If we can just wake up and realize,

That our true selves are not our Facebook or Instagram.

That we are not the amount likes or followers we receive,

That our true beauty comes from within.

Then it will be time to really socialize.

No more will I be a slave to this.

I must say it has helped me a great lot,

But also made me worse,

Now my end has come,

As I believe it is time to release my chains and delete-

*ding*

What is this?

Did I get over 100 likes on my post?

Did anyone comment?

Then I find myself sinking into the dark abyss of social media once again.

- Lya

0 notes