#i wrote this tired

[corkinavoid]

Tim, internally: I need to make sure my family doesn't start the shovel talk the moment we appear, I can do this, I just need to introduce him the right way

Tim, walking into the dining room, hand in hand with Danny: Bad news, Damian's grandfather stole my spleen four years ago. Good news, my boyfriend of six months returned it to me yesterday and even installed it back!

Danny, the picture perfect image of innocence: Hi!

The Batfam, who knew nothing about the missing spleen or the mere existence of a boyfriend in Tim's life: wh-

[dcxdpdabbles]

Danny: Welcome to Danny's comics, how can I help you?

Damian: I require the assistance of SpaceGhost. That is his handle for an online Catacomb Master profile. The web page said he could be found here

Danny: That's me. You're a bit young to be into the Wizards and Wands fanclub, though.

Damian: I am not part of that ridiculous club. My elder brother, Timothy, on the other hand, is a fool enough to dress like a wizard and fight imaginary dragons on a weekend.

Danny: Ah. That makes sense. So what can I help you with, buddy?

Damian: I am not your friend. I am barely a acquaintance.

Danny: dully noted

Damian: I've come to request your presence on July 19th for a private in person session for Timothy.

Danny: Um, I don't know. I would have to close the comic book store and-

Damian: I shall pay you twenty thousand dollars. I have ten of it now. Cash. *slaps open suitcase on counter*

Danny: Count me in! What's the address?

The night of Tim's Birthday

Damian: I have purchased Timothy a private entertainer for his birthday, as requested, Stephanie. He is in there now setting up, so it is best we do not enter until the session is over

Steph: Leaping Lizards Batman, I was joking about the stripper!

Damian: *slow blink* I was supposed to get a exotic dancer?

Steph: Wait, if it wasn't a stripper what did you hire for Tim?

Tim running past dressed like a wizard of old: THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE. SPACEGHOST IS MY IDOL

Damian: I read his diary and found multiple hearts around his Catacomb Master handle name. Timothy has been obsessed with his online videos since before learning of Father's second identity.

Steph: This is somehow worse than a twelve year old booking a stripper.

[thekaiserroll]

Hug

It's nearly impossible to have a quiet and peaceful day with the crew, like the strawhats. Nami is mostly used to the noise on Going Merry but one day she gets fed up with Zoro and Sanji arguing. Not only are they extremely loud, but they've also already broken way too many things during their fights.

She decides that If they want to act like brats, then she's going to treat them as such. So she makes them apologize and hug each other in silence for an hour. None of them are happy about this punishment, but Nami threatened to raise Zoro's debt, and Sanji couldn't say no to her. It could be worse.

It's awkward enough for them to not incite any fight for a long time and Nami is quite proud of herself. She knows it won't last forever but at least now she knows how to handle them. It inevitably happens again. And again. And again.

Much to her surprise, those fights became more and more frequent. And what's even weirder is that she could see the way both Zoro and Sanji occasionally glanced at her to make sure she was nearby. It's almost as if they wanted someone to make them hug each other. As if they needed an excuse.... these idiots.

Soon, they don't even need Nami's help. When they aren't busy training, cooking or fighting, they cuddle together. Sometimes Luffy or Chopper would join them, but most of the crew knew it was their time.

After two years spent separately, they became extremely clingy. It's no surprise when they start sleeping in the same bed. What is surprising is that despite them behaving like a lovey-dovey couple, those oblivious idiots are STILL unaware of each other's feelings.

[secretly-a-trekkie]

[konigsblog]

riding simon riley...

cw: female reader, female anatomy.

mdni - 18+ - minors will be blocked.

the smell of simon's musk and cologne fills your nostrils, prominent in the air as you grind your wet cunt against his hard, thick boner. your slick pussy drools onto his stiff shaft, his burly arms behind his head as he smirks up at you, watching the effect he has on you. you're a fucking mess; slick, panting, and your breathing laboured and heavy. you roll your eyes to the back of your head, rubbing your clit in soft, soothing circles as you tighten your core.

you sit up, angling the head of his dick against your slit, to your tight hole. slowly, you ease down onto him, each inch of his lengthy cock sliding into your slicken pussy. you whimper quietly, simon quietly chuckles at you, pushing your hips down and thrusting up into you, a grin stained on his face as you begin bouncing. you rock your hips, bouncing onto his weeping dick and looking down at him breathlessly.

“go on, baby... play with you’r nipples, yeah?”

your moans come out stuttered and loud, eyes watering due to your growing orgasm as you bounce on his hard cock, toying with your hard, perky nipples. you ride him so well; taking his big cock perfectly just like he expects. he grunts out, groaning hoarsely at the pulsing sensation of your pussy around his dick, your cunt drooling onto him. “c’mon, takin’ me so well. let’s get faster, hmm?” he encourages, grinding up into you and working your hips down onto his lap.

you yelp out when you feel him push against your cervix, his pink tip rubbing at your cervix back and forth as you bounce faster onto him. looking down at him lustfully, you moan out, playing with your hardened nipples as your orgasm washes through you unexpectedly, walls tightening and spamming around him as you cum down his veiny dick, riding him weakly as your thighs tremble like jelly, unable to balance yourself as you become dizzy and fucked-out stupid. he breathes heavily, chuckling at the mess of you and squeezing your waist tightly, hard enough to leave dark bruises as he bucks his broad hips skywards into your hole once again, shooting strings of his potent load into your sopping pussy.

“did so well, darlin’...”

[capricoopla]

The Chemist

Slugcat whom I stole the nose of and slapped it back on its back

[kovacs-on-ice]

Why Halo: Reach (campaign) is a trainwreck.

A lovable trainwreck, don't get me wrong, but a trainwreck nonetheless.

So Halo Reach is one of those games that leaves a community divisive, it was the first halo game to not have a universally loved reception among the community at large. I think it's a fun game, a really fun game, I adore it's multiplayer and the hours my friends I spent dicking around in forge world. It also has the best armor system Halo's ever had to date, infinite can suck my ass--I'm not paying 15 dollars for a shader. You ain't D2, you can't pump and dump my wallet.

ANYWAY

Reach is such an interesting case, out of universe, as it feels like such an out of character move by bungie. Let's consider for a moment, that the same company that tried to stop the release of fall of reach WEEKS before it's release, was notoriously uncooperative with ensemble studios(people who made Halo Wars), who had a game director undercut the books of the series he was making(And it was Staten, if you could believe it. It's on an old 2000s podcast.) decided--"YES, LETS GO DEEP INTO THE LORE, OUR FAVORITE PART OF THIS FRANCHISE. WHILE WE'RE AT IT, LETS USE THE SPARTAN-IIIs" ?????? Does this not feel weird to anyone else?

If you look at vidocs for reach, and other behind the scenes content, it's said that they wanted to do their own thing, and ignore the books. which if that's what they want to do, sure, fuck it.

Then why did they include First Strike references (radio logs you can hear on certain levels/maps) or HAVE NOBLE TEAM BE ALL IIIS

This is the thing that gets me the most. Halo Reach, legit, feels like Bungie's last middle finger to microsoft at certain points. Reach is the home of the Spartans, well the IIs really. It's what gives the planet, and it's destruction, such significance to characters like Chief, or Fred, or any II. That was their home, that's the closest they have to a childhood burning at the stake.

So why, do tell, DID YOU MAKE NOBLE TEAM IIIs

THEY HAVE ZERO CONNECTION TO REACH

THEY GREW UP ON ONYX

What also confuses me here, is that it's not like they gave a shit about how many IIs were in Red Flag. THEY MADE THE GAMES, THATS THEIR LORE. THEY COULDVE JUST MADE UP IIs. The reason that First Strike can be such a gut punch at certain points, is because the IIs are watching their homes burning all around them, and they can do n o t h i n g about it. It's tragic, and it makes their survival in the remnants of the glassed planet even more perilous.

I love First Strike, if you couldn't tell. If Ghosts of Onyx didn't exist, it'd be the best halo book. I'm not gonna defend this opinion because it's right.

And Bungie wrote entire CVs and A FUCKING MESSAGE BETWEEN KURT AND MENDEZ in the leadup to Reach. They did all this legwork for the pay off of having characters unrelated to the conflict they were fighting.

also, I know Jorge is a II, I WILL GET TO JORGE.

Reach was planned, in development, as this giant military campaign first . Check the vidocs/behind the scenes videos, I think Marty O'Donnell is the one who says it. (also marty was the dude who had miranda and johnson die in 3, he edited that in, check the making of Halo 3. Who kept letting the audio director fuck with the script?)

There is a big, big problem with making the battle of Reach a military campaign, however.

In FOR, the kicker about the battle of reach is that it wasn't even a battle. The Covenant overwhelmed the UNSC's fleet and flooded the planet groundside, the battle was incredibly shortlived. I think only a day. Chief went from having near 30 of his siblings living and in the field, to being the only spartan in active combat.

First Strike keeps this narrative too. The Spartans never get to fight their valiant last stand. The loss of the fleet makes the different splinters of Red Team retreat to their various fallback points. Fred, Kelly and Joshua kill an invading army of covenant, sure, but the rest of the Spartans prevent were handling a variety of what-the-fucks

I do think that a theme that carries from book to game is fighting in the face of hopeless odds, which I like.

In the game, Reach is invaded by a smaller covenant fleet and ONI just....never tells the rest of the planet? It's the long night of solace, a big cloaked super carrier, and a few destroyers. (Unironically, the lore for this is that the Shipmaster of Solace came to reach on the search for forerunner artifacts, realized he was in way over his head, and just tried to get his fleet to 1-man all of reach before the prophets got too mad.

which is funny, in retrospect, because right after he eats shit--Thel shows up in the big boy fleet. I wonder how that conversation went down with the surviving officers.)

In FoR, they bring the IIs back to Reach to prep for Red-Flag and to get them the Mark V upgrade. Same thing with the pillar of autumn.

This happens by August 27th. Chief was already on the planet beforehand for a few days to debrief highcom about Sigma Octanus IV, that's beside the point. It's to be assumed that there were a sizable amount of IIs on Reach in the weeks before, since they were being pulled from a variety of fronts, and slipspace travel means everyone would've gotten there at different times. Chief was also leading a force of 12 Spartans at Sigma Octanus IV, the battle right before reach, so I assume they came with him.

August 30th---OOPS, ALL COVENANT

The battle starts as FoR-First Strike say it does on the 30th, AND THAT SAME FUCKING DAY THE PLANET IS LOST.

---------

In Reach, the game, the covenant were found on reach JULY 24TH. THAT IS WHEN THEY PRESS THE "OH FUCK, WINTER CONTIGENCY" BUTTON. If you go by the game, it seems like there's just all out warfare across the planet after that point. The mission after is Noble Team defending Castle Base from a Covenant Corvette (also, like, it's goofy as fuck to think that no one outside the select military participating in these engagements did not, or hear about, the giant space marine animal firing death from above. I doubt the covenant gave a shit about which humans they turned to ash knew about them, after their presence was found out.)

So most of Reach's Campaign happens, including the huge fucking battle at Szurdok Ridge. You know the battle that had scarabs and scorpion tanks casually duking it out in the background, same battle that they used a MAC round in atmosphere in?

By August 13th, 60 percent of the UNSC fleet is recalled to defend reach. Not too long after that, Noble Team kills the super carrier. Then what I assume is Thel's fleet shows up as in the cutscene it shows a massive fleet entering the system immediately after the solace's destruction. After that is the battle of new alexandria, which ends august 23rd.

The game and the book link up on August 30th, as Noble team delivers the other half of cortana. (Halsey split her into two so she could continue her forerunner research, also, halsey never talks about meeting Noble Team in First Strike. Jun literally escorted her to Castle Base. In her journals that came with Reach's deluxe edition, I think there is a few pages of her freaking the fuck out about them. Not-so-concidentally Eric Nylund also wrote that Journal.)

343 tried to link the game and book stories together, and the result was--

Oni predicted there was a 67% of reach being found, just let it happen, no I am not joking.

The battle of reach up until where FoR picks up is just on one side of the planet, somehow they contain it so the planet doesn't freak out. I do not know how, the covenant were fucking EVERYWHERE.

ONI also let the long night of solace pally about, they were mad when Noble Team blew it to high hell because they wanted to use it for Red Flag.

THEY BROUGHT ALL THE IIs BACK TO REACH, MID INVASION, AND JUST DIDN'T TELL THEM UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE???? ALSO, IF THE PLANET WAS BEING INVADED BY THE COVENANT, WHY DID YOU NOT USE ONE OF THE MANY ORBITAL MAC CANNONS.

This is a GOOFY retcon, I swear to god.

It takes them like, an entire fucking month, to get the fleet to Reach. I'd also like to mention, KEYES LEAVES THE BATTLE AND LANDS ON REACH SO HE CAN PICK UP CORTANA FOR THE LAST MISSION. CHIEF WAS LITERALLY NAPPING DURING THIS. I'M SURE HE WOULD'VE LOVED TO HELP NOBLE SIX AND EMILE OUT IF THEY WOKE HIM THE FUCK UP.

@zitasaurusrex

I apologize if this was hard to read, and tbh I probably also missed stuff li-WAIT I FORGOT

IN HALO REACH THEY HAVE A SEVEN PART RADIO MESSAGE STORY ABOUT BETA RED, SPLIT ACROSS FIREFIGHT AND MULTIPLAYER MAPS. THE SPARTANS WHO WERE LEFT TO DEFEND THE GENERATORS. THEY'RE CHATTING ABOUT THEM AS THEY'RE PUNCHING UP TO THESE TANK SQUADRONS BAREHANDED. BUNGIE, BUNGIE, THIS IS ALREADY A MESS, WHY ARE YOU INCLUDING THIS. Edit: I realize I never got to Jorge. I think it's stupid to have Jorge be in noble team because it SHOWS they thought about the concept of what reach being invaded would mean to a II. They just didn't care enough to expand on it in any substantial way.

[crystallinestars]

I think Aventurine would be too afraid to ask you out directly, so instead he would get you to play a game with him. Can be poker, a coin flip--anything really. The only rule is that the loser has to do anything the winner wants.

Of course, Aventurine wins, and with a smug grin tells you to accompany him for the rest of the day. He asks the right questions to sneakily deduce where you would want to go if given the opportunity (aquarium, museum, the movies, etc) and takes you there under the guise of being curious what's so special about that place.

He splurges to dress you up in fancy clothes, pays for all your meals, and buys you anything that catches your eye. No expense is too big when it comes to pampering you, but he'll laugh it off as him trying to get on your good side with some bribing.

It is a date in all but name, but he'll never admit it is one.

Aventurine gives everything and asks for nothing in return, only jokingly teasing you about giving him a kiss in exchange. In reality, he doesn't expect anything as he doesn't want to force you.

Yet, if you give him that kiss he secretly yearns for, perhaps you can make him confess that there is more to this encounter than just fulfilling a bet. Perhaps you can catch a glimpse of the feelings he tries his best to hide when you're around, find a crack in that smug facade of his.

[gayafsowhat]

Eepy hours

[wheelie-sick]

happy disability pride month to every transmasc with a condition that's heavily associated with women

happy disability pride month to every transmasc who feels dysphoric because of their condition

happy disability pride month to every transmasc who gets misgendered by all the awareness for their condition

happy disability pride month to every transfem with a condition that's heavily associated with men

happy disability pride month to every transfem who feels dysphoric because of their condition

happy disability pride month to every transfem who gets misgendered by all the awareness for their condition

[checkadii]

The eeper before I eep myself

[luckyfox3000]

DC X DP PROMT #21

Hello, hello, you flock of readers. I have another promt!

Shivers wracking his frame, blood leaking between haphazardly stitched cuts, Danny Fenton limped away from an unmoving hazmat covered body, tucked into the alleys corner.

Betrayal. That's what this was.

He trusted them. He trusted them.

Why.

Whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy-

Deep breath Danny, deep breath.

He has no choice now.

He cant leave just Ellie there.

He has to go back. But he cant go alone.

-------------------------------------------------------

...

"Tt, And tell me again why we cannot speak of this with the justice league?"

"I told you, if they haven't helped us till now, then they definitely wont help with this. I'm trusting you not to go running off to your dad with this info."

"Just who do you take me for? I have kept far greater secrets Danyal."

"What, like the fact you have a wayward clone living a life out their?"

*sigh* "silence Danyal, I must focus my attention on the opponents."

"What, became rusty?"

"Tt, do not assume such things of me. It is you who has not held a sword in your hands for years."

"Yeah yeah, whatever.... its good to see you I guess."

"... and to you as well Danyal."

Feel free to use or add on!

[dcxdpdabbles]

Bruce: It's come to my attention that a paranormal being has made Wayne Manor its residence. I've hired Constantine and his team to remove-

Tim: BUT BRUCE I LOVE HIM!

Bruce: What-

Tim: Stop trying to tear us apart!

Bruce: Tim wait what are you-

Tim: You'll never made me break up with Danny! NEVER!

John watching Tim race up to his room where he senses the ghost boy: I may be taking a shot in the dark here, but I think that lad is dating a ghost.

Bruce: Timothy Jack Drake Wayne, did you sneak a boyfriend into this house?! Young man, you turn right back around! *running up the stairs yelling*

John: So Bruce has no problem with the lad being dead?

Alfred: Please, as if Master Tim is the only one who dated a ghost. I used to have a gentleman caller on the other side as well.

John: Blimey, and here I thought you were just boring and snotty. Who was the ex?

Alfred: Clockwork

John: .....I have never respected another man as much as I do you Alfred.

Alfred: Yes, well, make sure it stays at respect, young man. I don't find children attractive

John blushing and in a squeaky voice: Yes, sir.

Madame Xanadu by a circle of salt: Soooo does this mean we're still getting the ghost out?

Zatanna: We better. I don't want to watch John make a fool over himself over Alfred anymore, then I have to. That man is way out of his league.

Madame Xanadu: What does that have to do with the Ghost Boy?

Danny popping in the middle of the circle: I think it's cause she has feelings for him. Personally I can't see it. Sad trench coat man is famous in the Zone for being terrible in romantic communication-

Zatanna: Bind the circle! We got him!

Madame Xanadu pale: What have we done.....your royal majesty, please excuse this disrespect. We had no idea you were the ghost, I swear on my soul-

Danny: That's okay. I don't mind at all. This is cute actually *swipes salt* like when a little kid pretends to shoot you.

Zatanna: ......that was our strongest binding spell.

Danny: Like I said, cute. It's not nearly as cute as my boyfriend, though. Tim's cuteness broke the bar! By the way, Alfred, I have a message for you from Clockwork. He wants to know if you are willing to have dinner sometime?

Alfred: Been there, done that. And frankly, I feel it's rather pathetic of a high being sending his grandson to ask for a date.

Zatanna blushing: Okay, John, I get it.

[synthe4u]

The stress was beginning to seep in. Your eyebags becoming more visible by the day. No one could tell you were more tired than the past week.

You were more quiet and less aggressive in your talking. You seem to have lost your spirit in a way, but of course, the man in the mask figured it out.

Ghost eyed you on the other side of the room. You were bobbing your head, nearly falling asleep before being shaken awake by the slight fall of your body.

You were being distracted by the lights and paid no mind to Ghost's wandering eyes.

It wasn't until around 2100 (9:00pm) when he knocked at your door. You weren't asleep yet. Your light was still on.

Opening the door you asked, "Is something wrong?"

You hadn't changed out of uniform and still seemed out of it.

"Why aren't you asleep?"

"Why are you awake?"

You snapped back at him. You weren't in the mood. You've been tolerable all day, no arguments or fights, but it's clear he came to ruin that.

He stared at you in silence. The mask made him more intimidating which caused you to fess up.

You ran your hands through you hair, frowning in disgust at the knots in your hair.

"Just some family problems is all."

"Losing sleep over your family?"

You sighed, "What do you need?"

"Need you to sleep so we could complete this mission."

"I'm not broken, I can still do the mission."

Silence permeated the hall, other than the occasional fizzle from that one light the base swears isn't broken or haunted.

"Can I come in?"

The door widened a foot further, allowing the masked man inside. You didn't understand why you would let him in. You don't let anyone in your room, at least, not for silly matters like this.

He followed you further into your room after shutting the door, and settled on the side of your bed. You didn't have time to question it before you fell.

Collapsing on the spot, Ghost caught you before the ground could do actual damage to your body.

I guess the sleep had caught up to you, just as Ghost had caught you.

Sleep truly is not for the weak. Stay healthy, guys.

.............................................................................................................

masterlist

[betterthanbatman1]

He’s so pookie lookie mookie frookie tookie

[konigsblog]

simon riley with a breeding kink...

simon ‘ghost’ riley x afab!f!reader.

cw: breeding kink, praise, afab!f!reader.

könig version | soap version (coming soon)

to say simon riley is overprotective is an understatement. he wants everybody to know that you belong to him and that you're committed and devoted to simon.

he'd be lying if he said he didn't have baby fever. he'd see families with their young children or people from his work going on leave for their pregnant wives, wanting that for himself. he wants to tend to your needs and care for you. the fantasy of fucking you until your stomach swells with your pregnancy plagues his every thought, unable to focus the entire deployment until he's finally home, insatiable and hungry for you.

it's the middle of july, the sun is bright and shining, and the sight of the sunshine glowing on you leaves simon desperate. he wants to bend you over and lift your pretty summer dress up to fuck you until you're chanting his name like a prayer, tears running down your cheeks with pleasure and delirium. 

simon pins your arms behind your back, one strong arm wrapped around your figure, holding you tightly against his chest. you can feel his bulbous, hot cock between your thighs as he lifts your dress up, the head of his thick cock leaking against your hole, easing inside slowly. you take each inch so well, stretching out your little cunt and his desires and fantasies, leaving his breathing heavy and laborious. you whimper at the wet sensation; the thickness of simon's hard dick pushesld inside your pussy leaving you trembling.

you listen to the sounds of his praise, praising you for taking his lengthy cock so well. “that’s it--attagirl. you’ll make the perfect mama, won’t‘cha?” he huffs and puffs at the sweet smell of your arousal; his thrusts are merciless and fast, leaving you standing on wobbling legs with your cunt spread open and around his girthy dick. his sounds are guttural, letting out hoarse growls and grunts, his full and tight balls leaking into your slicken cunt as you tighten around him, his creamy and thick cum fucked into your tight pussy.

simon won't be able to keep his hands off of your pregnant body, the swelling of your breasts, and your sensitivity. 🍼