#i wrote this kind of gen so yeah

[sysig]

I thought I was done being feral about Tamagotchis but no, it was just a lull

[n0vazsq]

Mi vida | FC43 x Reader

pairing . . . franco colapinto x rbr!driver!reader

summary . . . What's better than one chaotic F1 driver? Two! And that's the story of how you got together with your boyfriend, Franco

request . . . no!!

word count . . . N/A

warnings . . . none! story set few days before monza! cringe-ish (??) dialogue at the end?

faceclaim . . . girls from pin!

alexavia yaps . . . woohoo!! finally wrote a smau again and its for my boy franco!!! kinda short but yeah i made franco and y/n gen z pr nightmares!! hope yall enjoy it <3

yourusername

liked by francolapinto, maxverstappen1, yourbsf and 2.3M others

yourusername look at my driver dawg he's losing this race Tagged: francolapinto

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maxverstappen1 he's in a williams

yourusername and?

maxverstappen1 him losing shouldn't be a surprise

francolapinto 😔

yourusername MAX DONT BULLY HIM

maxverstappen1 ill make sure to tell him sorry when i lap him

francolapinto what did i ever do to you max

maxverstappen1 say lewis is your idol

username1 i live for the rbr teammates and franco fighting

username2 raw. next question

username3 girl went to f1 and became a whole new person (cough franco terroriser cough)

yourusername i need to put him in his place, I AM the one with the redbull seat not him

username3 Y/NRPLIED HOLY SHIT

username4 praying for their pr managers

username5 i just know they made max's life a living hell

username6 i'm shaking for the interviews because i know y/n and franco will be menaces

username7 franco's f2 interviews and y/n's interviews now scream 'i will destroy your life'

username8 woah

username9 y/n please post more y/n

francolapinto who's that handsome man

yourusername me

francolapinto you can't be this beautiful

yourusername wow okay tell that to your next girlfriend because WERE DONE

francolapinto dont break up with me before my first f1 race ill ram you into the wall

yourusername ill crash in fp1

francolapinto noo mi vida youre so sexy pls dont die haha

yourusername forgiven 😊

username10 are we just going to ignore them breaking up in a comment section

username11 that happens like thrice every day just ignore them

username12 man i love them

username13 goats of f1 frrr

username14 theyre so iconic being the first couple in f1

username15 meow

username16 real

username17 screaming crying throwing up

username18 manifesting franco ends up in the points

username19 what about y/n??

username18 queen always ends up in the points

username19 mb mb

username20 franco calling her 'mi vida' MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS SHIT

francolapinto

liked by yourusername, alex_albon, bizarrap and 1.1M others

francolapinto life is hard (p12 in my first race) but at least mi vida got p8! and we did the track walk together 😊🫶 Tagged: yourusername

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username21 i REFUSE to believe franco typed that caption

username22 FRRR like its too innocent and peaceful

username23 their pr managers took over

username24 HOW IS HE SO PRETTYYYY

username25 my kind of love frrr

username26 no.1 couple argument closed

username27 sigh i wish i was a wag

alex_albon photo credits?

yourusername up my ass

francolapinto no mi vida only i can see up your ass

yourusername what he said

alex_albon tmi....

username28 theyre back!!!!

username29 i live for their chaos

username30 got me on my KNEES

username31 what id pay to be her

bizarrap ayyy ¿cuándo vas a hacer que nos veamos? (ayyy when are you going to make us meet?)

francolapinto pronto pronto (soon soon)

bizarrap dame una fecha exacta hermano (give me an exact date bro)

francolapinto cuando vienes al gran premio (when you come to the grand prix)

bizarrap vale vale (okay okay)

username32 I SEE THE AESTHETIC VISION FRANCO

username33 shes so pretty omgggg

username34 idk if i want to be y/n or franco

username35 holy shit hes gorgeous

username36 came here for franco stayed for y/n

yourusername woah youre so hot

francolapinto youre hotter

yourusername nahhh youre way hotter

francolapinto kiss me if im wrong but im hotter

yourusername then i wont kiss you because youre hotter

francolapinto fuck i didnt think of that

yourusername ill still kiss you just come over to my driver room

francolapinto 🏃🏃

maxverstappen1 should i be worried or....?

yourusername mind your business max

maxverstappen1 i'm the one who's going to here those disgusting noises not you

yourusername too bad

alex_albon i feel like i should be grateful its not happening in williams

francolapinto im here mi vida where are you i cant see you

yourusername im right here in the room??

maxverstappen1 WHAT IS FRANCO DOING IN MY ROOM

francolapinto shit wrong room

yourusername hurry up franco

francolapinto On my way!

maxverstappen1 let me leave the garage first

username37 man i love them

username38 HELP FRANCO GOING TO MAX'S ROOM???

username39 did max just expose them or

username40 i feel like im intruding reading the comments between them

yourusername

liked by francolapinto, maxverstappen1, bizarrap and 2.8M others

yourusername haters wish they were on our level fr Tagged: francolapinto

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username41 if being in a parasocial relationship with them was a crime id be executed

username42 THE PICS??? EXCLUSIVE SUBSCRIPTION??? EXCUSE ME???

username43 how are they both so good looking

username44 the face card is INSANE

username45 I NEED THIS SO BADLY UGHHHHHHH

username46 STOP not the matching glasses

username47 need a boyfriend who will take me on bike rides while i wear my redbull helmet and he wears his williams helmet

francolapinto i dont want to see my beautiful face i want to see YOUR beautiful face

yourusername but youre so pretty how can i not put your face more than mine

francolapinto mi vida your face isnt even on there

yourusername yes it is

francolapinto its covered by that ugly helmet

redbullracing 🤨

francolapinto this one is ugly i like her own customised helmet

yourusername aww amor 🫶 i love your helmet and i love you

francolapinto i love you more

yourusername no i love you more

francolapinto no

alex_albon if you continue with this sappy stuff ill vomit

yourusername okay 'goodmorning baby'

alex_albon SHUT UP

yourusername oi francolapinto we found his weak spot

francolapinto lets get ready to terrorise him

yourusername bet

username48 if they need a third im always available

username49 i want to see mother and father but theyre more like mommy and daddy

username50 erm

username51 if my bf aint like this ion want him

alex_albon ill admit this is actually cute

yourusername thank you!!

francolapinto we're not cute we're hot

yourusername we're both tho

francolapinto true

alex_albon why'd you have to ruin such a beautiful and innocent moment

francolapinto life

yourusername WORDS 🗣️ 💯🙏❗

username52 legit can't decide who's better looking

username53 oh how i need this more than oxygen

maxverstappen1 franco doesn't how to play padel

yourusername he beat me

maxverstappen1 anyone can beat you

francolapinto don't bully her like that

maxverstappen1 or what

francolapinto brazil 2018 pt2

maxverstappen1 DONT YOU DARE

yourusername ok max thats it go stare lovingly at charles or idk

maxverstappen1 ???

francolapinto we all know max dont worry

maxverstappen1 ??????

username54 so um whens the wedding

username55 man i need me a francoyn relationship

username56 did they just confirm lestappen?!?!??!?!

username57 im sighing dreamily at these pictures

bizarrap ah so youre the girlfriend?

yourusername yes yes i am

bizarrap y'know i cheer for you and not franco because you get higher places

yourusername im flattered 😊

francolapinto this is a betrayal you should be cheering for ME only

username58 THE PICS.

username59 giggling blushing and kicking my feet

username60 when will y/n post more y/n sigh

francolapinto how are you so gorgeous

yourusername i should be asking YOU that

francolapinto mi vida you are the prettiest girl i have ever seen in my life and you call ME gorgeous?

yourusername fuck yes

francolapinto i love you

yourusername love you more

williamsracing

liked by francolapinto, yourusername, alex_albon and 1.3M others

williamsracing can you spot the odd one out? Tagged: francolapinto, yourusername

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username61 how to kms no borax no glue

username62 people DIED (i'm people)

username63 they haven't commented yet???

username64 ikk it's so weird

username65 they usually hop on after like 6 secs

username66 its not a want its a NEED

username67 MILF = man i love franco (and y/n)

username68 i just KNOW their kids will be BEAUTIFUL

username69 face card never declined

username70 and never will

redbullracing don't go stealing around our drivers

williamsracing im just the admin 😔

redbullracing me too 😔

username71 driverS????

redbullracing that was typo

username72 IS FRANCO GOING TO REDBULL??????

username73 redbull admin x williams admin

username74 the otp fr

username75 the lack of franco and y/n is concerning

username76 WHERE ARE THEYYYYYY

francolapinto add more photos of mi vida i want to see her beautiful face

yourusername i want to see YOUR beautiful race

francolapinto running

username77 there they are

maxverstappen1 admin why now i have to hear them make out for the next 3 hours

williamsracing sorry?

username78 3 HOURS???

username79 theyre more chaotic than we thought

username80 aww y/n looks so cute

yourusername shit where's franco i want to see his face

williamsracing we want to see YOUR face

yourusername oh...😊 admin you make me blush

francolapinto admin?

williamsracing im sorry pls dont kill me

francolapinto i wont just because you take photos of me for mi vida

williamsracing i love you y/n

yourusername love you too admin

yourusername and you too franco

francolapinto love you more mi vidaaa

francolapinto

liked by yourusername, alex_albon, bizarrap and 1.1M others

francolapinto to mi vida, the love of my life, happy anniversary to us and i love you forever Tagged: yourusername

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username81 deleting all my socials after this

username82 they are SOULMATES vro

username83 this screams 'forever and always'

username84 'mi vida' OKAY BRO BYE IM LEAVING THIS EARTH

username85 legit fairytale vibes

username86 imagine being this in love

bizarrap ¡enhorabuena a los dos! ¡que sean muchos más! (congratulations to you two! here's to many more!)

francolapinto gracias hermano, lo aprecio (thanks bro, i appreciate it)

yourusername gracias!! (thank you)

username87 the caption is from a song i refuse to belive franco wrote it

username88 i am JEALOUS, ENVIOUS, GREEN.

username89 poetry fr

username90 they ARE the main characters

username91 FRR like everyone else is just a side character

username92 alex play 'that should be me' by justin bieber

alex_albon congrats to you two! least favourite couple i know!

francolapinto thank you alex!

yourusername thank you!!!

alex_albon did you just ignore my statement

yourusername yes we chose to ignore it

username93 this is the kind of love ppl write books about

username94 STOP NOT THEM CONGRATULATING EACH OTHER ON THE RADIO IN THE LAST RACE

username95 if they break up then love isnt real

maxverstappen1 you two deserve it! take care of my little sister francito

yourusername MAX STOP

francolapinto will do

yourusername i love my life

francolapinto and i love you

username96 i just know they are each other's ride or dies

username97 where to buy a franco asking for a friend

username98 if i could id just take over one of their bodies to experience this love

username99 im waiting for the fics

username100 straight out of romeo and juliet

yourusername i love you so much, and ive did since forever. you are everything to me, i could never let you go. you deserve everything, mi amor

francolapinto youre my everything too, and im keeping you forever, no takebacks. if I deserve the everything, it’s only because you’re MY everything, mi vida. every star, every light, it all reminds me of you. te amo más de lo que las palabras pueden decir (I love you more than words can say)

yourusername STOP IM GOING TO CRY 🫶🥹 I LOVE YOU SO SO SO MUCH

francolapinto I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVERYTHING MI VIDA

fin.

taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 ,, @ilovebarcaaa ,, @httpsdana ,, @paucubarsisimp ,, @justaf1girl ,, @awritingtree ,, @freyathehuntress ,, @chilling-seavey (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)

[oscquinn]

𝐢 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 || 𝐥𝐢𝐩 𝐠𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫

pairing: lip gallagher x fem!reader

summary: just lip being a cute bf + debbie and ian being little shits

warnings: lowercase on purpose. poorly written tbh. swearing but y’all know how it is. heavily unedited. gen said yolo so i’m posting

A/N: i’ve been on hiatus for god knows how long but my roommate and i started watching shameless and i can’t get this mfer out of my head. things w school and life are hard rn so i just wrote this comfy cozy little thing in my notes app. yolo asf.

wordcount: probably like 500 or less idk i wrote it in my notes app at 1am

— — — — — — — — — — —

you’re nestled in lip’s arms, high up on his rickety top bunk. somewhere between finishing your nails and kissing until you could barely breathe, you had fallen asleep right against his chest.

you stirred now, your cozy world interrupted a squeaky little voice. “are you in love with her?” debbie questions.

lip shushes his sister, “be quiet, she’s sleeping.”

you were wide awake now, but much too comfortable to move and make that little fact known. plus, you wanted to hear his answer.

“i asked you a question dummy. are you in love with her?”

lip stutters, “i-i dunno. i really like her, okay?”

you’re satisfied with that answer. “in love” was a little too much too quick. but “really like” was something that made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

“what d’ya like about her?” ian presses.

you can practically hear the gears turning in lip’s head as his siblings impatiently await a response.

“she’s- i dunno, she’s pretty?” lip replies. you hold back a scowl, annoyed at him for not having a better answer.

“yeah, great rack,” debbie comments.

“jesus, deb!” lip’s head falls back in frustration, one hand coming to cradle your head as not to wake you with the sudden motion.

“cut the shit lip,” ian interrupts. “tell us what you really think.”

you hold your breath as you wait for his response. his lips brush your hairline before he sighs. “she’s sweet, yeah? real kind.”

“a real woman of the people,” ian snorts, “princess diana type.” then “ow!” as you hear debbie shove him.

“and- and she’s real smart, too,” lip continues. “really, really fuckin’ smart. an’ she works hard. she just tires herself out sometimes.”

he strokes your hair gently, pressing a few more fleeting kisses to your forehead.

“you’re so whipped.”

you hear debbie shove her brother again, and this time ian fights back, the two making a ruckus as they push each other back and forth.

“come on guys, out. now.” lip orders his siblings around with that same stern voice you’ve heard plenty of times before.

debbie pouts. “but-“

“no buts. go on, she’s fuckin’ sleepin’ in here an’ you’re gonna wake her up. fuck off.”

“we were just-“

“fuck. off.”

“jesus,” you can practically hear ian roll his eyes. “alright, alright. we’re going.”

debbie yells for fiona as the two shuffle out of the room, not bothering to close the door behind them.

you smirk to yourself as lip groans above you, showing your cards. “you’re awake?”

you peer up at him through your lashes, a smirk planted on your lips that he’s just dying to kiss off. “can’t believe your little sister said i have a great rack,” you whisper.

lip laughs, loud and genuine. “yeah, she’s been stuffing fi’s old training bras. growin’ up an’ shit. i don’t like it.”

you’re quiet for a moment, admiring him. you know how important those kids are to him. he’d do just about anything for them, including the minor crimes you find him tangled up in on a weekly basis. he loves them like they’re his own kids, which honestly they kind of are. they may shove each other around, curse each other out, yell and scream at the top of their lungs, but at the end of the day lip has been more of a father to his siblings than frank ever was.

“you really meant all that?” you ask.

lip looks down at you, his blue eyes soft in the dim light. “yeah. yeah, i did. meant every word.”

you smile, leaning up to place a solid kiss on his lips. “for what it’s worth,” you murmur, “i really like you too.”

[anundyingfidelity]

FOR ALL TIME, ALWAYS – Loki x female reader

Summary: Loki escapes the TVA for a moment. Desperate and brokenhearted, he looks for you, his wife, in the Sacred Timeline. Even if you saw him die ten years ago.

Word count: 3.9k.

Warnings: LOTS of angst, some fluff, spoilers of Loki series in general. Language. Maybe I'm not getting how the branches work oops. This is right after the end of 2x02 and before 2x03. My English is also a warning, just in case.

Notes: while looking on the tags I checked a post of someone asking for a TVA Loki fic where he finds the reader but her Loki died in IW (not canon in my head btw). So I wrote it because is such a great idea, but I can't find the original post... ;-; anyway hope you like this!

☕ if you like my writing, support me with a ko-fi !

GEN MASTERLIST!

It's harder to stay...

Wasn't this situation hard enough? Sylvie was right. She had a point. But Loki wanted to do the right thing. Maybe he would find a chance... Again, right? Probably he would make the proper decisions this time.

The TVA was already fucked up, and with it, the thousands of timelines and lives in danger within them. Sometimes, it looked like it didn't matter. In the end, they were trying to fix something that was already broken.

Loki let out a deep breath he didn't realise was holding and walked to talk directly to his partner, Mobius.

"I need a favor," Loki mumbled, so the grey-haired man would be the only person to hear his voice.

Mobius met his eyes. He knew that gaze, it meant he was up to something. "What kind of favor?"

The god motioned Mobius to step away from the newly acknowledged variants and far away from what B-15 was witnessing. The branches were pruned from the whole existence; thousands and millions of lifes lost to the void in just the blink of an eye. Loki knew he had to do something before it got worst. Something for himself.

"I need to go the Sacred Timeline," Loki announced.

"Are you nuts?" Mobius scolded, in the same low voice tone Loki had used.

"Is just- listen, it's something I have to do. I really need to go back there. Need to see someone, make sure everything is okay," Loki insisted.

During all the times Loki showed he was desperate, Mobius was sure this was the peak of all of them. He wasn't explaning more than necessary, he looked serious, and his voice was crisp. Loki knew what he wanted at that moment. Mobius sighed, his hands finding the pockets of his pants, unsure of Loki's request.

"So it's personal..."

"A little, yeah," Loki nodded.

"Promise it'll be quick," Mobius said, taking off the TemPad from his pocket and his hand stopped in the air before the object could lay in the god's grip. "Don't make me regret this."

"I won't."

2029, Sacred Timeline

When Loki arrived to his destination, the nerves got the best from him. New York looked no different from the last time he was there. Shifting his usual clothes he wore at the TVA, he chose a plain suit to go undercover, or at least decided he would try to, considering he was a criminal once in Midgard.

But as he walked through the halls of the familiar building he met decades ago, he didn't really care. He longed for something else. Better say, someone. And it was you.

You, who met him in the past right after Thor's banishment, and even helped him to find the Teseract, only to give up to SHIELD and those idiots that people called 'The Avengers'. Of course his heart hurted for a long time, but Loki tried to deny the feelings blooming inside and instead, he just decided to walk away from you, even if that meant hurting you. It was the best.

At least that was what he believed until he checked further his file; the file that Mobius had prepared for him. His life. Even after what he did to your people and planet, you still held no grudges. And Thor was good enough to seek for yours and the sorcerer's, Stephen Strange, help once Hela appeared in their lives.

Loki would never forget the loving look in your beautiful eyes when you saw him again, after years of parting ways. He really paid attention to you while watching his file, and he found there was only love, protection, and care in you. All for him. Someone who didn't deserve it, he thought.

He felt grateful at least he had the pleasure to enjoy happiness for a moment. Even if that meant Asgard was destroyed. Loki already lost his mother, his father, and he almost lost his brother. He couldn't stand losing you either. The simple idea of living without you - even if he didn't know you further than your Loki did - was unbearable pain.

So while in the ship on the way to Midgard with the asgardians and survivors of the Ragnarok, you held a cozy, small wedding when he asked you to marry him. This was one of the parts Loki would replay again and again from his file, with disbelief that he was actually happy and joyful, enjoying a good time with you, his brother, and all the asgardians who survived. Loki felt full of hope after your wedding, thinking fate had better things to come with you as an oficial part of his life.

Unfortunately, it didn't last long, thanks to the Mad Titan. As his steps got near your door, the memory of his brother and your figure mourning on his lifeless body appeared on his mind. It was an image he couldn't erase that easily. Probably, he would never forget that was his original destiny all the way. That was meant to be. And for now, he could not change it.

Loki stopped outside your apartment. He took a deep breath and raised his shaking hand to reach the doorbell. He waited for a moment, not knowing if seconds or minutes went by, it felt eternal. Until the door opened and he saw you.

The bright smile you had on your lips faded away. Your eyes flooded with tears, your forehead was furrowed, and still, Loki thought you were the most beautiful creature in all the Nine Realms.

"Hi..." Loki barely whispered, his eyes were glossy and a single tear also ran down his pale cheek.

You were clearly in shock. You wanted to get closer and finally touch him, to feel him physically. But even if you wanted to move to take his hand to confirm it wasn't a trick of your ruined mind, your body was stiff and your feet were glued to the ground.

"Is this an illusion?" you trembled.

All Loki could do was shaking his head, before muttering. "No..."

"Loki, I saw you die..."

Tears ran down your face, denying to yourself that this was real. That this was really happening to you. And your mind started to wonder all the possible scenarios and reasons on why him, the god of mischief, the only person you loved dearly with all your mind, body and soul, was standing right in front of your door even if he was gone for you... Long gone now. And that couldn't be undone.

"I know you did, my love."

You tried to smile, even a little bit, as he pronounced those words so dearly. Loki came closer to your figure, carefully placing a trembling hand on your cheek, feeling the tears flowing on your skin. You leaned into his touch, with a simpering smile. Such was the effect you had on him, that a silly smile he also had on his lips.

And you realized Loki was so real... His touch, his heat, his smile, his scent, the way he would hold you... Everything about him was exactly as you remembered. You felt his lips brushing softly against yours, gentle and hesitant, and instantly, you melted into a slow kiss, sure knowing that Loki would taste the salt of your tears running down your face. Leaning in closer as the space between would allow you, you savoured each second your breaths allowed, longing to remain right there for eternity. For all time. Always.

"But now I am here... and I can explain," he whispered once you separated your lips from his in the sweetest way.

You let out a soft chuckle. "Mind to enlighten me, oh, god of mischief?"

Finally you guided him inside your apartment. That old apartment Loki saw his other self visiting a couple of times before you were something. It still had your vibe around it and he loved it. He felt like he was at home after a very long time. Once you closed the door, his arms wrapped around your figure, and you let yourself cry, pressing against his chest and with a tight grip of your hands on his coat.

"You don't have any idea of how much I have missed you all these years," you sobbed and his heart shrank on his chest. "I kept wishing every night and every day to be me instead of you."

"My love," he said softly, separating a little and cupping your cheeks with his warm hands. His eyes were red now because of the tears he was holding back again. "Don't say that... It was supposed to happen."

"What?" you mumbled.

Your hands found his wrists and you pulled his palms away from your cheeks. However you kept the contact with him, you just needed to touch him, to feel he was in the flesh. He was alive right now, wasn't he?

"Look, I am not your Loki. I know what you did, what the Avengers did after Thanos-" his voice broke just a bit but he continued. "I know everything. I just couldn't resist knowing there was someone for me, out there in the Nine Realms, capable to love me for who I am," Loki explained as he watched your face. Was it disappointment? Confusion? He didn't know, but he had to tell you the truth.

Your voice came out as a barely audible whisper. "So... you are saying... you're another Loki? Another him?"

He nodded softly. "I am." Loki thought for a moment on how to explain everything, but he just went for what his heart felt it was right. "It's a little complicated. I did something that wasn't supposed to be, and perhaps will sound like I'm insane, but thanks to that I am kind of trapped in time. With an organization that is not what everyone thought it was, hence a multiverse was created. Sponsored by another me, by the way. You are in what is called the Sacred Timeline, where things flow as how they were supposed to since forever. And I just needed to see you after I found out you were the love of my life."

You took a moment to understand everything he said, wishing that his fate would have been different from what originally happened. Loki gave his best, even in the last worst moments, he was changing for good. For you. For Thor... It wasn't fair.

"Your death was supposed to be then?"

"Yes, it was."

"Oh, Loki," you cried. "You know what, I don't care what's happened. I'm just- I feel happy seeing you here... Please tell me everything you've been through. I want to hear your voice again, to know you're with me right now, to feel you near... I'm not crazy, am I?" you chuckled between tears and Loki curved his lips in a smile, wiping your tears from your face with his thumbs.

Loki granted your wish and explained everything, answering every question you had about the lies of the TVA; the files he found out were his whole life; about Sylvie, Mobius and his variants. He spilled all you wanted to hear, asking like a child, until you understood what was happening. You noticed he truly had changed, just like your Loki did when he reunited with Thor before the Ragnarok took over Asgard. It was a bittersweet feeling however, thinking how much they they seemed to each other. They were the same person after all, but this Loki didn't had the chance to continue his path as it was supposed to.

Taking his hand into yours, you leaned towards him and laid down your head on his shoulder while you both sat comfortable in the couch, just enjoying each others company. Your eyes were dry at this point after crying for what it felt were hours, but his voice helped to soothe you enough.

"I'm glad knowing you have someone like Mobius by your side," you said after a quiet moment. "He sounds like a very good friend," you looked at him, waiting for an answer. "Because that's what he is to you, right?"

"He is a great friend, I'm not alone if that is what is troubling you," Loki affirmed.

You let out a sigh. "That is totally a relief to me."

Loki chuckled softly, leaning to leave a kiss on your hair. "Now you've heard everything about me, would I hear something from you?"

"I'm just a mortal, Loki," you smiled. "Doing the normal shit, not the superhero stuff anymore. I am hating my pretty much normal office job every day; I feed the birds when I go outside at the park, also thinking about adopting a cat or a dog... Maybe a dog."

"Or you could do both."

"Yeah, I might. But my place isn't that big for pets. Sometimes I feel like I'm too alone, very much alone... I would love to have a big farm, or a cabin in the mountains with lots of plants, pets and animals to take care of." The idea did sound good for Loki. Hopefuly you could find peace that way. "Do you remember Pepper?" you said, straighting up on the couch to look at him. He nodded. "Well, after Tony died I still visit her and their daughter, Morgan. She is ten years old, could you believe it?" Loki noticed the sorrow and pain you still carried after all those years of losing your friends, your people... "And I've been missing you and mourning you for ten years as well."

"It's not your fault."

"I know, Loki."

"Do whatever is the best for you, my dear... I would have loved to be here with you now, as the Loki from the Sacred Timeline."

You smiled, but it was a sad smile. "Well, either way, you're here now. It's all that matters to me."

Once again, you shared a loving kiss and took his hand to walk to the kitchen, asking him to take a seat in your breakfast bar, glad he decided to search for you in one of your free days. Otherwise, you would have surely missed his visit. But he was looking for you. Probably Loki would have found you anywhere at this point.

You talked some more while you had some tea and ate some cookies that you saved for special days on the shelfs. The afternoon was pleasant, and this was your turn to speak. Loki, coat long gone, was catching up with you and he asked every single thing about your life now. He smiled more than ever, laughed more than you have ever seen, and it was certainly something you could get used to from now on. Knowing you never continued your life with another person made his heart ache though. However, Loki was no one to blame. He would have done the same thing. No other was like you, no one would have replaced you.

"It's my decision," you finally said, reading his face like an open book. "I have loved you, I love you now and I will love you forever."

He took your hand, lacing your fingers with his. "I know..."

"The day we married you gave me a ring. I always have it with me, today I'm not working, but I use this necklace with your ring," you searched for the necklace hiding inside your shirt and taking it off, you showed him the precious jewel hanging on a fine golden chain. The ring he recognized once was from his mother. "I want you to have it."

"No,I can't-"

"But this is what I want. I know I would have to forget, because you will make me forget about this. About you, coming here, risking everything just to see me. So please, take it."

Loki knew you had made a decision, but then if he left, taking your memories away about this day, what was left for you? He had nothing, and it was okay. He would still know he came to the Sacred Timeline; that he kissed you, that you shared a moment together, that you still loved him. But you will have none of that. And you, as human as you were, would die without the memories and without the ring. You would have nothing and he was sure couldn't bear it.

"Perhaps I can have something else to remember you, I want you to keep this ring as a promise," he closed your hand around the necklace. "My promise that I still love you and I will do it. Forever."

And you sighed, taking the necklace back with a smile. Always so stubborn. "Give me a moment."

Loki saw you leave the kitchen for some minutes. While he was alone, he noticed the sunset through the windows, as it was almost ending to welcome the dark sky around the city. He knew he had to go soon. As much as he didn't want to and the simple thought of runing away was starting to hurt him deep inside.

When you arrived, you stood by his seat on the breakfast bar, putting a small photograph, perfect for a passport, on the surface. It was all in black and white, and you looked what you thought it was nice. Loki took it between his hands, lovingly and with a proud smile on his face.

"I used that when I was taking my Master's degree. Looks pretty decent," you joked.

Loki laughed, tears right at the corner of his eyes. "It's more than that. It's perfect."

His smile faded, knowing this meant he had to leave you again. Loki wasn't supposed to have a happy ending, was he? How he wished to stay there by your side.

You kissed his cheek as a sort of goodbye and comfort at the same time, noticing the sudden change on his face and whispered softly. "So you don't search for me on those files."

"Thank you, love."

Loki got on his feet to put his coat on, like some sort of mental preparation before leaving your apartment and the Sacred Timeline. He saved your photograph on his pocket securely along with Mobius' TemPad, pretending to be strong and swallowing all the pain he was feeling right at that moment. You took his hand, lacing your fingers together one last time and walked until you stood there, in the middle of your living room. He looked at you with loving eyes, trying to save your face and your figure before returning to where he was supposed to be now. And it seemed like time had stopped, as everything Loki could see and feel was you and only you.

"I guess is time now," you began, interrupting his mind.

"I guess it is," Loki nodded, expecting an answer from you. Anything. But it never came. You were also trying to save the moment as much as you could.

So he cupped your cheeks, feeling for the last time your warm, soft skin against his palms. He didn't want to talk, because if he would have said something, it meant you were really saying goodbye forever. What Loki didn't know is that you felt the same thing.

Was there something good to say to your lover, whose destiny was just to bring the best from other people with his cruelty and chaos? To the man who had learn to make things better and, in the end, died trying to protect his people and his wife? Was there anything out there that would bring the god of mischief the happiness and love you always knew he deserved? With these branches and multiverse thing, you hoped deep in your heart there was a universe where he found what he longed for so long. This was just one of many of them. Probably he was happy and living in peace in some others.

"I love you, Loki," you mumbled. He caressed your skin with his thumbs and wiped the small tears that were running on your cheeks.

"I love you too."

Loki leaned to kiss you one last time. You welcomed the kiss with shut eyes, savouring his lips and the taste of your tears, mixing now with his own.

The pain started to bloom; every heartbeat felt like a sledgehammer pounding against his chest. He was not ready to let you go, so this was all he could do. The seidr flowed from his fingers, the green lights covering your body with the help of the spell he casted for you was made to protect you from anything that could get out of hand in the Sacred Timeline, particularly from his own hands, the hands of the TVA, or any other danger that could chase you. Because if something would happen to you due to his stubborn decision, Loki knew he wouldn't forgive himself. What he was sure about though, was that he would still look for you until the end of time.

So when the kiss ended, you fell asleep in seconds. He had to take your sleeping figure with his arms to your bedroom, where he carefully laid you down on the bed. Making sure you were comfortable in your sleep, fixing the pillows and the blankets, Loki remained there, just to take in the serenity emanating from you. It was something you had, the ease and calm your aura projected to everyone in the room. This was the last thing Loki wanted to save from you.

He kissed your forehead and dried the tears on your face before standing up. Once you were to wake up in some hours, you would not be able to know everything was real. Loki made sure you thought it was a dream. So that is what you would have in your head. Something you wished for so long that will only be nothing but thoughts, scenes and emotions that felt absolutely true. As real as life could be.

Loki took the TemPad and opened the timedoor to go back to the TVA, where he knew Mobius would be waiting already since he left for hours. Without looking back to your room, he stepped in and forced to compose himself just in case he would bump into someone else. He sighed, observing through the halls of the headquaters as he made his way back to the room that was assigned to him.

At his door, a worried Mobius was already waiting for him, walking in circles.

"God, Loki I thought you were gone for a second," the analyst breathed out. Loki just handed the TemPad and Mobius took it back. He noticed his weary demeanor and teary eyes. "Thank you. Sorry I doubted you for a second."

"It's fine," Loki shrugged it off, looking for something on his pocket. The photograph slipped from his fingers and fell down to the floor. Mobius was quick enough to pick it up for him, but as he gave it back to his owner he observed it thoroughly.

"So this was the personal thing you did," Mobius said, looking the photograph resting on Loki's hand. He remembered that face from his files.

"Yeah... I guess all set now," Loki sighed.

"Good, I hope you're ready for another trip to the Sacred Timeline." Mobius turned to walk away, deciding it was better to give him some time, but he turned back to Loki before doing so. "And if you're feeling like talking about this any day, only between us, just let me know."

And with that, he walked away. Loki smiled, standing alone outside his door.

You were right. Mobius was a good friend.

[sgiandubh]

No lies last forever, part 2: the (over)due confirmation

With the Happy Sad Confused Tenth Anniversary Live Special being made available online, I think all doubts have now been lifted about the entire Intergalactic Bullshit this fandom has been deliberately fed for years and years in a row, by a cheap, sad troll and his accomplice. Both imbeciles' determination being only matched by the cast's complete indifference to fandom drama and, as I already wrote (https://www.tumblr.com/sgiandubh/764711074507390976/no-lies-last-forever?source=share), ***'s incompetent, tone-deaf PR.

You can watch the entire recording here, by the way:

The part where S specifically addresses his (non-existent) 'friendship' with William Shatner has been explicitly planted by the end of Jack Quaid's dedicated segment. That it has been discussed and planned prior to the show is obvious. And this time, Josh Horowitz wasn't even subtle - he announced the topic way before it 'spontaneously' popped into the conversation (39:42):

Transcription follows:

Josh Horowitz (JH): 'So, what's the dream for further voiceover roles, do you want a Pixar movie, do you want Outlander -the cartoon, what do you want?'

[laughter throughout the panelists]

S: 'Oh, I'm a Star Trek fan, actually' [women in the audience boo and shout - I wonder why, seriously], 'I am a Star Trek fan, I grew up watching Next Gen, so maybe Below Decks is... come on, guys.. '

[Note: yeah, he's such a fan, he has no idea the correct name of the cartoon spin-off, in which Jack Quaid has a voiceover role, is Star Trek: Lower Decks]

JH: 'We'll get him out in a second' [note: Jack Quaid], we'll talk some Star Trek, amazing...'

See? Not even subtle, if you ask me. I think this is something S wanted out for a good while now. It doesn't erase or even ease the pain and the trauma brought to so many people in this fandom by a pair of idiotic bullies, but I think it was very brave of him and, at any rate, it's better later than never.

And so, I waited. And waited. And waited. And then, here it went (01: 02: 54):

JH (consulting notes):' Um, we also should mention Star Trek: Lower Decks, we talked Star Trek a little bit earlier...'

Jack Quaid (JQ):'And, by, the way, this is the last season of Lower Decks, but we would have loved to have you! What the fuck, I didn't know you watched the show! [inaudible, if someone caught it properly, something like 'that was so close', I'd love to know more and especially who said it - thank you] Unbelievable!'

S: ' That is so cool, man!'

JQ: 'Oh, thank you, dude! Oh, yeah, hey, let's get rendered (?), let's do this, we keep going, let's get him on, let's do it!'

JH: 'Isn't...isn't William Shatner a big Outlander fan? I feel like he is...'

S (very uneasy): 'Ah... erm... yeah... (scratches back of his head)...I hung out with him once, we went to his stables and I watched him like riding a horse and stuff.... And, I don't know, it was really weird, cause sometimes I wonder if I am speaking to him via messages and stuff, or if it's actually his assistant [JQ: 'oooh!'], I don't know...'

JQ: 'Does his assistant look a lot like him?'

S (chuckles): 'Kind of...Yeah, you can't tell them apart. Yeah, no, but I believe he was a fan, until he saw me ride'.

Despite the jocular tone, I think everything is pretty much clear, here. Definitely a prepared conversation, despite Horowitz's efforts to make it sound playful and spontaneous. Something he even took prior notes about and made sure to include in the panel - nothing more serious than that, in fact. As for the sad cretin mentioned there, what would be left to say... S sent the guy to Coventry in barely two phrases and actually poked fun at his appearance and demeanor ('you can't tell them apart'). So long for the fictional 'friendship' and 'communication' between S and The Assistant, so long for the braggadocio that horrible little man exhibited all the way, pretending he actually had a personal relationship with S (well, as we all see, he actually doesn't: he doesn't even have a name, in S's book, as acquaintances, let alone friends, do). His only claim to fame was what, in reality? Answering some X DMs sent by S to his employer? Hello? How about his threats, then? How about his repeated calumny of people he didn't even know, calling them 'crazies', 'in need of medical attention', etc?

And please, don't come after me with that sorry excuse that 'it's S's humor'. There was nothing humorous about it and I have proven it already.

I will leave you draw your own conclusions about the non existent friendship with Shatner, something that has probably been 'encouraged' ex nihilo by *** and taken to dramatic cheapness and conflict with and within this fandom by The Assistant himself, mainly, and his friend, the OG Troll. I do not remember hearing/seeing Shatner himself saying all those horrible things (please correct me if I am wrong), so until I am proven the contrary, it's only logical to have many thoughts and questions about these people's strange, very strange obsession with OL and its two main co-stars.

Not to mention the most idiotic threat I have ever read in this fandom. Something I fell upon by absolute chance this morning. I mean, I couldn't even believe people actually bought such primitive, kindergarten bullshit:

[July 29th, 2017]

' Do you still want OL to continue or not, people?'

Empty, illogical threats: why would *** cancel its actual cash cow show, just because two co-stars had something SO obvious, that people realized there was more than the official narrative to it? And what about the crazy story about Albrecht & co. investigating and allegedly menacing fans with going to court? Has this cretin ever realized the potential media scandal would have far outweighed the inanity of such a claim? That it could very well have a serious impact on ***'s company profile and future projects, even?

I really, really think both of these Unsavory Clowns should find another playground and another obsession to cling on (wasn't the first, would not be the last). Elsewhere. In a galaxy far, far away.

PS: Thank you, regular attendee who bravely spilled the tea and thank you, old shipper who came forward and confirmed. And many heartfelt thanks to all of you shippers, old and new, who also bravely stepped forward with their personal take on everything these two have done to this place.

Dare we hope this is the beginning of the end? What is sure, is that no lies last forever. Or as we say in Romanian: minciuna are picioare scurte și adevărul o ajunge/'a lie's got short legs and truth will always catch up with it'.

[Later edit]: edited to add a new, improved clip that actually does include the entire conversation.

[doubleddenden]

So the stories leaked from gen 4 development are certainly interesting, eh? I'm sure everyone has their own feelings about it- some of you are apparently ECSTATIC about fucking your Machokes. Good for you, my guy. Some are horrified, thinking something's been defiled (it is fiction and most importantly non canon, you're fine, get a grip).

Me? I think the lady (yes, it was a lady) that wrote all of these is REALLY PASSIONATE about her craft, and was also referencing real world mythos and how they portray similar instances- I think we all know that Zeus has probably done worse on all giving and receiving ends of these stories, as well as Poseidon, Loki, and probably some other myths from Europe, China, and definitely JAPAN- key word there. In fact, the Typhlosion story is probably a reference to a similar story about a badger yokai that can alter its face to appear human, and the Octillery story is definitely a reference to- well, tentacle porn is a thing for a reason that goes pretty far back as a way to get around censorship in hand painted porn. The contents of the story aren't really much different or more terrifying than mythos we'd see in the real world (or if you're in the bible belt like me, probably EXPOSED to with morning bible studies before class growing up), and it's mainly just shocking to see it in the context of Pokemon.

And I think that's kind of the point. Sinnoh is already a pretty dark region in terms of lore and myth, and has surprisingly religious undertones considering the family friendly nature of Pokemon and its general target audience. Obviously none of the horse, badger, sloth monkey, octopus, god, or... Lapras fucking made it to the final cut, although in Japan they still reference People and Pokemon being so equal at some point that they could marry- that's even kind of referenced in Legends Arceus with I think a diary written by a man kidnapped by a Froslass? its been a minute, but you probably know what I'm referencing.

I think an interesting question would be "How did we get to these terrifying stories?" Especially Typhlosion and Slakoth.

Its important to remember this: None of this was meant to see the light of day outside that office circa 2003 to 2004ish. Yeah, surprisingly you weren't supposed to see the story of a man fucking an Octillery BEFORE throwing it back out to sea in a rated E for everyone game, and you didn't! You saw it via twitter, reddit, 4chan, tumblr, discord, or your local weed guy who all spread it from someone who got it from confidential office logs we wouldn't see unless someone took that info from Game Freak's darkest depths of other secrets they'd prefer to keep hidden. Every game and media company has this, good and bad, to various degrees of sfw and not. Did you know Disney has an entire vault of actual PORN that animators would make of their own anthropomorphized characters? Locked nice and safely, too... with uh, some exceptions breaking containment, I think?

So with that being said, we understand this is meant to be privileged info only a handful of people were supposed to see. That means they can use words and stuff you normally wouldn't see- Adventure time for instance had Finn and Jake saying "fuck" in story boarding, kinda funny- because its meant to be workshopped and tinkered with, refined until you get something desirable.

In fact, creators will often propose darker ideas than what they actually want so that they can more easily talk censors into an outcome they ACTUALLY desire. Alex Hirsch did this a few times in Gravity Falls' production, and you know Disney was a bitch to deal with (although he probably didn't propose stuff like this, but you get the idea). So this being said- Obviously nobody wants a story about a Typhlosion engaging in a non-con relationship with a minor it kidnaps. Nobody wants to read a story about humans MUTILATING Slakoths for fun and then getting revenge impregnated by a Slaking, only to give birth to a Slakoth and have it killed and thus kill yourself out of grief for your lost child (people reading this without context- ho boy you guys have missed out on some crazy shit that's popped up). So what is okay from here?

Maybe a little Pokemon death after going a while without it and accruing a reputation of being safe for kids? Mention of Pokemon bones being picked clean of meat and put back into a river so it can come back reborn? Some darker undertones of Pokemon being tormented by Team Galactic? How about a story of a boy slaying Pokemon with a sword, but less detail of mutilation of Ursaring and Slakoth? All of this made it into Diamond and Pearl, didn't it? Add in a little Human and Pokemon "Marriage" that is easily scrubbed out and replaced with "eating at the same table" for the more sensitive Western audience, and you have some pretty believable, dark, somewhat uncomfortable but child friendly lore for Pokemon.

Not to mention, a lot of this was probably pitched just to get a feel of the vibe they were going for in the game. If you read back through the stories, bits and pieces end up being used in other, non Poke-fucking stories, or recontextualized. See the above.

While its certainly a relief that they're non canon, it is a rather interesting look at the development of gen 4 lore and actually makes it feel more... realistic, in a way- again, comparing it to real world mythos and religious tales. That, and honestly? The religious backstory is actually, unironically amazing- HEAVILY based on real world religion, but plenty of real world religions steal from other religions and mythos anyway (coughchristianitycough).

Its actually a bit sad, because in any other JRPG, Arceus becoming a wounded woman that an ordinary man cares for, Arceus falling in love with this man because he treated her so tenderly, bearing human twins, the twins becoming Dialga and Palkia to fight some Titan that would become Mt Coronet, and Arceus loving this man so much that she took his soul to create Azelf, Uxie, and Mesprit to spread love and joy throughout the world? That would literally be INSANELY GOOD world building. Plus! Arceus was a human woman when she did this! It was also consensual! Can you imagine what the world would have been like if we had gotten not only FEMALE Arceus- god of all Pokemon universes- but also a HUMAN INCARNATION of her? And this was BEFORE Giratina came into the picture, apparently. If anything, we got robbed a bit of some deep lore and potential story telling from this being cut, imo.

But one more thing to consider is this: All the stories, even if they did make it to the final cut, would still be stories within a story. Fictional folktales within a fictional setting. If we judge the above by how relevant the ACTUAL content that made it into the games were to the actual overarching plot... It'd be overall kinda useless beyond some flavor text. That's kind of the sad fact of it. Pokemon Players especially, grown adults too, are not exactly known to be well read and some play the game by rapidly A pressing every ounce of dialog they come across, even in brand new playthroughs. I'm sure some remember that one idiot on twitter that thought he made the discovery of the century when he found Snowpoint Temple in Legends Arceus, right? So understandably, especially when you're working on a clock, on limited space, on new and unfamiliar hardware, and trying to be as broad and reachable to audiences as you can- things get cut. Even... Some of the coolest lore building of all time SERIOUSLY A FUCKING PANTHEON WHAT THE HELL.

And I lied, there is one more thing to consider, especially for anyone actually morally offended by some of the content mentioned- Keep in mind that this is in 2003 to 2005ish Japan, with Game Freak (who we know are pretty out of touch in some regards, even by today's standards), before twitter, before tumblr, during a more edgy time for... well, everyone alive at the time, and especially adults. That's 20 years ago. Some of you may not have been alive at that point (did you finish your snacks and juice, lil guy?), some of you probably had a lot of your formative education influenced by the more puritanical side of tumblr or twitter, but it was simply a different time and place. That's it. The people involved in this have moved on and have probably grown into better people, and probably haven't made more fics like this. Maybe. Who knows. It's fiction anyway, and nobody real got hurt from it, and that's what's most important at the end of the day.

So that's my thoughts on it. I think I'm more annoyed by the fact that one of my favorites got a worse Vaporeon treatment than anything, and there's possibly the risk of Nintendo/TPC/Game Freak overreacting and gatekeeping Typhlosion out of the games for a bit. Sigh. My first pokemon, man. Well, anyway, try not to take it too seriously if you see the jokes and memes about it. It'll pass.

But hey, sexy Latina Skyla is canon! Shadow the Hedgehog wins!

[winchesterwild78]

The Director

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader (wife)

Warnings: None. This is a fluff piece.

A/N: Got inspired by a series of pictures  @jackles010378 posted. Just a quick story about a day on set with Director Jensen. This is a work of fiction and does not depict real life. No disrespect to Jensen or his family. All work is my own, do not take it or copy it without permission. Wrote this fast and edited it fast, please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

Jensen loved being an actor, but he also loved directing. He had a great eye that lended to amazing shots and takes. He was thrilled when he was approached to direct some episodes of his latest project. 

“Hey Y/N, how’s things going at home? How are the kids?” You heard your husband’s husky voice ask on the other end of the phone. “Hey babe, we’re good. They are outside playing and I’m fixing some lunch. Is everything okay? You sound off.” 

Jensen let out a long sigh, “Yeah, they asked me to direct the next few episodes.” “Oh Jens, that’s great! Why don’t you sound more excited?” “I don’t know. I guess I’m just nervous. It’s a lot of responsibility and I don’t want to screw it up.” “Jensen, you’re amazing at what you do. You always give all of yourself to anything you do. It doesn’t matter if it’s work, family or friends. You put all of yourself into everything. That’s one of the things I love about you. Jens, honey, you can do this.” 

“Thank you baby, I just needed to hear your voice. I love you.” “I love you too, Jensen, now, go do your thing baby.” You hung up and felt a pang of guilt. Jensen always put too much pressure on himself and you knew being by his side would help calm him. 

You grabbed your phone and called Gen. “Hey Gen, I have a huge favor to ask. Can you watch the kids for me? Jensen has been asked to direct and I’m afraid he’s spiraling.” “Sure, Y/N. Bring them over. We can all hang out and they can have a sleepover.” “Thanks, Gen! You’re the best.” 

You ran upstairs and packed yourself, and the kids. You took the kids to Gen and Jared’s and thanked her again. Then you headed for the shooting location. You were thankful this latest project was local enough so you could drive to set. 

You called Clif so he could meet you at security and get you inside without issue. You arrived and made it through security without any problem. “So, Clif. How is our boy doing? Honestly.” “Well, he’s stressed and of course he’s trying to make sure everything is perfect. You know how he hates to let people down.” “I know, thanks for getting me through security.” Clif hugged you and led you to the set. 

You saw Jensen behind the camera and he called cut as soon as you stepped in. He hadn’t seen you, and he was giving directions to the actors. You could see he was getting frustrated and he was trying to contain it. He called action and you watched as he moved around the set with the camera to get the perfect shot. 

One of the actors tripped and fell, so Jensen called cut again. The actor immediately started apologizing and Jensen put a hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, it happens. Are you hurt? Do you need a break?” The actor shook his head and told Jensen no. The actor looked no more than 20 so you knew he was new. Jensen was always so kind and understanding with mishaps on the set. Afterall, he and Jared did plenty to drive their directors crazy. 

Jensen saw what time it was and he cut for lunch. He was frustrated. As the room cleared out you saw him sit down, take off his hat and run his fingers up and through his hair. He let out a frustrated sigh. Seeing him like that always broke your heart.

You walked up behind him, his head still down and hands in his hair and you put your arms around him. “Hey there Mr. Director. You look like you could use a break.” You kissed his cheek. Jensen’s head went up and his big green eyes looked at you with excitement and love. “Hey baby, what are you doing here?” He stood and threw his arms around you and softly kissed your lips. “I had Gen watch the kids, and I came to see if I could help with my husband’s stress.” 

He sat back down and pulled you between his legs. Cupping your face he kissed you again, this time it was more passionate. “Come on baby, let’s get you to your trailer so you can eat some lunch and relax. I’ll rub your shoulders.”

The two of you walked back to his trailer, hand in hand and he wore a mischievous smirk. Once in his trailer he plopped down on the sofa and pulled you with him. He peppered kisses all over you and had you giggling. “I love hearing your laugh, darlin’. It’s one of my favorite things to hear.” You smiled at him, “I love when you make me laugh. Now, let’s get you some lunch. What do you want and I’ll make it or go get it.” 

“I’d rather just take you to the bedroom.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you. “Jensen Ross Ackles!” You laughed. He stood up and grabbed you around your waist, “Y/N Y/M/N Ackles. I can’t help it. I'm in love with my wife and can’t wait to please her.” You giggled, “Fine, but you promise you’ll eat after.” “Darlin’ I plan on eating during.” He winked at you and you blushed. 

“Yes, I’ll grab something later.” You took his hand and led him back to the bedroom of his trailer. Clothes were shed and you helped Jensen relax and release all his built up stress. A few times actually.

By the time you two were finished he had about 15 minutes before he had to return to set. “Jens, you need to get dressed and back to set soon.” He pulled you closer to him and groaned, “Do I have to. I’d rather just lay here in your arms for the rest of the day.” “Me too, but you have a job to do. I’ll be here with you tonight. I have a bag packed and Gen is watching the kids.” His smile grew big, “That’s great. I will get you all to myself tonight.” You shook your head, “Now, go finish the shoot for the day.” 

You both got dressed and Jensen grabbed a quick bite from craft services. He pulled a chair up for you to sit next to him while he finished shooting for the day. You loved watching him work, and sitting next to him helped calm him. The rest of the shoot went smoothly. By the time Jensen called cut for the day, everyone was exhausted. 

Jensen took you by the hand and led you out of the set and towards his trailer. Once inside he pulled you close to him, “Thank you for coming to set today. I love you so much.” “You’re welcome baby. I love you too, Mr. Director.” 

Tags are open, if you want to be added, let me know.  

Tags: @nescaveckdaily  @kr804573 @k-slla @jackles010378 @jawritter

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@suckitands33 @arcannaa @n-o-p-e-never @ladysparkles78 @smoothdogsgirl

[wickedsmille]

de-aged!Jason and it's tim's problem

Warnings for Jason being a wee little bean (sort of), Tim's super stellar skills with teenagers and the lack of any kind of editing. I wrote this and abandoned it so long ago but discovered it and was like aw, ok, s'kinda cute. :v

It's a tame gen fic with platonic cuddles and vague mentions to Jason and Tim's not so fantastic childhoods.

So. *vague hand wave*

He has ample reason to freak out because -

-------

“No. No way.” Tim is freaking out. 

“Who the fuck are you?” Jason demands. 

Except, it isn’t Jason because Jason is over six inches taller with over a hundred pounds of extra muscle. Jason is nearly Bruce’s size, not some long limbed, gangly teenager just starting to grow into his shoulders. Granted, the surly scowl and inner fire is all Jason, as is the narrow eyed suspicion. So is the far too large leather jacket and armor hanging off him and the domino barely holding on. It’s a small blessing he’d forwent his helmet for patrol. 

“Your worst nightmare,” Tim replies automatically. 

Realizing the inappropriateness of what he’s said, regardless of his always wanting to say it, makes him grimace because, yeah, for a while he kind of was Jason’s worst nightmare. They’ve slipped into something approaching civil co-workers since Jason decided to invade Titans Tower to test him via a vicious beatdown but they are nowhere near take care of each other after a magical mishap territory. 

At Tim’s words, Jason drops down lower into a fighting stance and squares up with Tim, unafraid and ready to brawl even if Tim is obviously trained because only the rare few decided to go out at night in a costume and mask without the skills to back it up. And Tim is bigger than Jason. By maybe an inch but he’ll take it. It’s still a victory considering adult, not magically de-aged Jason is a behemoth. 

Waving his hands frantically, Tim amends his previous statement. “That came out wrong.”

“How does ‘Your worst nightmare’ come out wrong?” Jason spits.

“Okay, tell me you’ve never wanted to quote a movie in the middle of a fight,” Tim shoots back.

Jason seems to chew on Tim’s words before he loosens up and stands though the tension refuses to leave and the wariness remains. “If you make one wrong move I’ll smack the shit out of you.”

“Been there, done that,” Tim says as his mouth gets away from him again. 

“Wait, what?”

Later, when he’s alone, Tim is going to bang his head against a wall and smother himself with his own pillow. He can’t <i>wait</i> so long as it makes him forget the misery that is this moment in which he can’t keep his mouth shut and he has a teenage Jason Todd staring him down like he’s crazy. Which, fair. None of the Bats are sane, per say.

“What do you remember?” Tim asks tiredly.

Jason chews over his words, coiled tight and still ready to strike. His gaze roves over Tim before he finally says, “I am. Was? Robin, I think. But I was just living on the street. So, I don’t,” Jason trails off, unsure. 

“So you remember some stuff from being Robin and some from before that but not everything?” Tim guesses.

Nodding hesitantly, Tim fights the urge to slap a hand to his head. Why not make things more complicated by not only taking years off Jason’s life but also jumbling the memories he does have? Tim doesn’t mind. This is perfectly fine. Without going over each detail, there’s no way to accurately tell how much Jason does or does not remember. It’s clear he remembers being Robin but not moving in with Bruce. The two things are so closely linked, it doesn’t bode well for what other holes are in Jason’s mind. But it’s fine. 

Tim decides not to say anything else and runs his hands through his hair. It’s a good thing Bruce isn’t in town, JL business as usual these days unless one of the big name Gotham Rogues starts causing trouble, or he’d be all over tiny Jason. There is one other plausible candidate to stick on Jason Duty. A candidate already in Gotham and primed for endless cuddles and forced bonding sessions since his newest victim is spending a few weeks respite at the Kent Farm. Dick is going to be ecstatic.

Reaching up, Tim turns his com back on and pretends like Jason doesn’t flinch. “Nightwing?”

“RR,” Dick greets cheerily. “What can I do you for?”

“I’ve got a situation.”

The shift between Dick the Brother and Nightwing the Protector is stark as he asks, “Are you in trouble?”

Hesitantly, Tim hedges, “Well, not <i>me</i>, but. You’ll want to see this. Meet us back at the Cave in twenty.”

“Us?”

Tim clicks off the com and mutes it. Sure, it’ll drive Dick up a wall to not know what’s going on but Tim doesn’t feel like getting badgered into telling the whole sordid tale of Red Robin and Red Hood getting bested by a two bit magician with a splintered down piece of wood and a pointed hat. Embarrassing would not even begin to cover it so he doesn’t fancy having anyone else drop into the conversation, Barbara.

The lesser of the two evils is obviously to let Dick stew in the knowledge that Tim is safe and whole but hiding a secret. There is no other possible resource. None that would save Tim’s already wounded and dying pride. 

“I’m not going anywhere with you,” Jason tells him harshly.

Tim fixes him with a flat look. “I’m not dealing with this, your brother can so you can either come with willingly or I’m tossing you over my shoulder and you’re still coming with.” How crazy is it to think he could easily carry Jason.

Jason tries to stare him down but Tim cocks a hip, crosses his arms and waits patiently. Eventually, Jason relaxes by inches. 

“Something happened to me, didn’t it?”

Tim can’t help but roll his eyes no matter how unfair it is to Jason since he can’t remember. “No,” Tim replies sarcastically, again knowing he’s being unfair but the universe started it by getting him into this mess. 

“You don’t need to be a bag of dicks.”

“You don’t need to use such language, young man.”

Jason looks like he sucked on something sour as he crosses his arms and hunches his shoulder inward. There’s a faint dusting of pink over his cheeks. It makes Tim feel a little bad. As far as he can tell, Jason is fifteen again, which sends a pang of hurt through Tim’s chest with the implications, which means he has all the false bluster and bravado that comes with being a teenager with the added bonus of being hypersensitive to embarrassment and criticism. He should stop being such an ass. 

Heaving a sigh, Tim waves Jason over as he turns his back and starts making his way down the alley to where his bike is parked. Hesitantly, Jason follows but his steps quicken as they draw near and he gets a look at Tim’s bike. The resistance is gone and replaced with awe as he circles the machine despite Tim swinging his leg over and mounting it. Patiently, like a saint, he allows Jason his moment of wonder. It is a beautiful work of ingenuity and power. 

Then the seconds drag out. Looking over his shoulder, Tim raises a brow and shrugs a shoulder towards the back of his bike. “So, I did tell Nightwing twenty minutes.”

“And the longer I keep us here the faster you’ll have to drive,” Jason replies without missing a beat, bent over and inspecting the anti-locking mechanism on the back brakes.

Tim grins, small and dangerous. “Alright. I’ll give you a couple more minutes.”

He gives Jason more than a few minutes because he knows the streets are empty and he can safely push his bike faster than he would without an excuse like chasing bad guys or coming to someone’s rescue. It took some coaxing to get Jason on and even longer to get him to wrap his arms securely around Tim but, once they had set off and Tim ran his third red light, both of them settled in for the too fast ride. Midway, Tim decides to show off and skid through a particularly sharp turn. It’s a flawless maneuver and Jason shows his appreciation by whooping loudly.

Tim does it again once they reach the cave. This time, he drifts into a narrow parking spot between the Batmobile and Nightwing’s bike. Jason’s arms tighten around him as they skirt the edges of the Batmobile by millimeters and he doesn’t let go even after they’ve come to a stop and Tim has killed the engine. Eventually, Tim has to pat Jason’s arms to get him off so Tim can breathe properly again. Jason promptly scrambles off at that. 

By the time Tim is turning around to face the main part of the Cave, Dick already by their side with a worried furrow to his brow. He blinks once at Jason, looks at Tim, blinks again at Jason then melts. 

“Oh my gods,” Dick says softly. He looks delighted and Tim does not envy Jason who’s eyeing him critically.

“When did you get so old?” Jason asks unkindly. 

Dick throws a hand over his heart and actually looks slightly offended. “Wow, okay, so I’m not <i>old</i> -”

“Yes, you are.”

“And, wow, I forgot how much of a little shit you were,” Dick finishes fondly. 

Jason bristles and looks like he wants to shove his hands in his pockets but the armored cargo pants are hanging too low for him to manage it without looking ridiculous. 

To make up for his earlier mistakes, Tim cuts in to take pity on Jason. “Turns out the guy we were chasing was the real deal. I assume you can give Zatanna a call and handle it?”

Together, Dick and Jason both ask, “You’re not sticking around?”

Tim glances between the two of them, bewildered. “Uh, no? I get enough second hand teenage angst from Damian.”

Jason doesn’t look happy about it but Dick does. He nods amicably and smiles widely. “That’s alright, I volunteer myself as tribute.” 

Without warning, he moves towards Jason with his arms raised and posed to envelope the teen in a patented Dick Grayson Hug. Swiftly, Jason side steps him and slides behind Tim so he’s blocking any other attempts Dick might make. Some of Dick’s joy falls but he looks undeterred as he lowers his arms and doesn’t move forward again. If Tim weren’t hanging onto some old hurts still and feeling petty, he’d feel a little bad for Dick. 

Tim shifts, trying to edge his way over to the computer so he can type up his report and be on his merry way but Jason gets closer and follows him like Tim’s shadow. The entire time, Dick keeps staring. The longer it goes on, the more Jason scowls at him. It is hilarious and, were Tim a casual observer, he would have burst out laughing long ago. As it is, he’s an unwilling participant in Dick and Jason’s detente and caught in the middle as Dick barely restrains himself from draping himself over Jason while Jason looks more and more like he wants to kick Dick in the nuts. 

Pointedly, Tim sits down in the computer chair which leaves Jason nowhere to go. He sticks by Tim’s side regardless, eyeing Dick who has followed them like a puppy waiting for a treat. Cuddles with his younger than normal little brother being the treat. 

There’s quiet for a few blessed minutes before Jason asks awkwardly, “What’s your name? I didn’t get it before.”

“You never asked before,” Tim says absently as he starts to write up his report. His fingers may go a little faster than usual in an attempt to hurry his escape. “But it’s Red Robin.”

“Like the restaurant?” Tim doesn’t have to look at Jason to know he’s judging. He can hear it.

“Yum,” Tim says flatly. 

“And,” Jason starts. Tim can make out Jason shifting awkwardly. “What about your real name?”

Tim cuts a glance Jason’s way and takes in the frown, the hardened edge to his eyes as they look between the Cave and Tim, the uncertainty. He shouldn’t feel guilty. He doesn’t. It’s not like he did anything wrong. But Jason didn’t either. The wannabe mage got lucky and it could’ve easily been Tim drowning in his uniform and overwhelmed by the way everything has changed from what he remembered. 

Looking back at the computer and continuing the report, Tim caves and answers, “Tim. My name is Tim. I was the Robin that came after you.”

“So this,” Jason pauses to wiggle in his armor, “was my idea when I passed on Robin?” Tim looks to see Jason giving the guns hanging from hips a dubious look. Right, he probably should have taken away the firearms.

There is so much wrong with what Jason said and has left unsaid. In no universe does Tim want to volunteer himself to answer. No amount of cutting edge tech, unlimited Zesti or epic W&W campaigns could make him handle this conversation. 

Tim searches for Dick who’s apparently made himself look busy at one of the closer work benches. His hands have stopped tinkering with the grapple gun he’d been poking moments ago and his back goes rigid. No matter how miffed he is with Dick, he doesn’t have the heart to make him handle answering Jason either. Lying is an option. Lying is a fantastic option but Jason deserves more than that.

Carefully, Tim settles on, “Yes, all that was your idea. You didn’t really pass on Robin but I don’t think we should get into it. I hope you’ll trust me and leave it alone for now.”

The silence stretches on between them, broken up only by Tim’s typing. 

“Okay,” Jason eventually answers. “Don’t get me wrong, I trust you about as far as I can throw you.”

“Let’s not test that.”

“What if I want to?” Jason asks cheekily. 

“Then we’ll see how far I can toss you,” Tim tells him simply.

“Oh, it is on, Tim.”

“Like Donkey Kong,” Tim agrees. “Later though. I’m trying to finish this and then I need to leave.”

“Didn’t peg you for a cut and run kind of person.”

“More the strategic retreat kind.”

“Sounds like you’re scared,” Jason goads him.

Tim spares him an unimpressed frown. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing.”

Jason smiles, sincere and cocky. “Is it working?”

“Hardly,” Tim drawls as he puts the finishing touches on the report.

He stands to leave once he’s saved and exited out of the file. Immediately, Jason’s hand shoots out and grabs Tim’s wrist. Surprised, Tim looks at him and doesn’t fight the tight grip Jason has on him. 

“Don’t leave me with him,” Jason mutters.

Tim looks at Dick who has the audacity to plaster on an innocent smile while leaning casually against the workbench. He can see it now. As soon as he leaves, Dick will be all over Jason. It won’t be the regular, suffocating attention Dick focuses on a sibling when he zeroes in on a member of the family. Oh no, it’ll be a hellish combination of guilt and excessive affection to make up for time lost and amend mistakes years in the past. Tim pinches the bridge of his nose just thinking about it. 

“Why don’t I drop you off with Alfred?” Tim counters.

Jason brightens but he doesn’t let go of Tim. “Alfie’s here?”

“Indeed,” Alfred says primly from his spot next to where the Cave connects with the manor. “Master Tim, why don’t you help Master Jason out of suit while Master Dick and I see to finding him something more suitable to wear and finishing dinner?” Alfred says it like a question but it’s far from it. 

Dick starts to protest but one look from Alfred has him clamming up. He scurries over to the lockers at Alfred’s prompting to change and shower before coming up where he’ll be waiting. Dawlding is strongly discouraged. 

Tim can recognize when his plans to flee have been thoroughly foiled. Looking Heaven-ward to plead the universe for mercy, Tim spins in the chair to face Jason. He looks a little terrified so Tim smiles gently. 

“He’s right. It can’t be comfortable wearing that and I’m familiar with the security measures built into the suit. Is it alright if I help?” Tim asks him first. Slowly, Jason nods and Tim watches as he swallows hard. Tell you what, why don’t I take the guns and I’ll walk you through everything else?” Tim offers.

“Oh gods, please,” Jason says quickly. His mouth snaps shut after, the flush on his cheeks moving up to the tips of his ears. “I mean, yeah, sounds good.”

Tim bites his lip to keep from laughing and silently disengages the security on the holsters and slips it off. He instructs Jason on how to do the same with the rest of the armor. He keeps his voice level and void of any condemnation or coddling as he does so. Surprisingly, it’s mostly painless. At least on Tim’s part. Jason looks about ready to bolt which Tim gets it, he does. The whole thing reminds him of school locker rooms and playing catch up on social norms in the worst setting possible.

That mildly traumatizing experience over with, Tim slaps his thighs and stands. “Why don’t we grab something to eat and get you into something less,” Tim stops and waves his hand at Jason but doesn’t continue. 

Even the compression shirt and pants underneath the suit are too large on Jason. He frowns down at the clothes and says sourly, “It’s not my fault I grow up to be a behemoth.”

“True,” Tim concedes. Again, they’re skating the edges of an endless rabbit hole he doesn’t want Jason to fall down. While he seems to be handling the situation well, no doubt prepped by Bruce for all manner of insane contingencies as a part of his training, Tim doubts a recounting of Jason’s death would go over as well. “Clothes and dinner then?”

“I’m not a kid so don’t treat me like one,” Jason snaps. 

“Stop looking like one and I will,” Tim counters. “I’m going to go change but you know the way up if you don’t want to wait.”

Although Tim isn’t expecting Jason to still be in the cave by the time he’s dressed down in sweatpants and a t-shirt after a sorely needed shower, he hurries through his usual after patrol routine. Just in case. The foresight turns out to be fruitful since Jason is meandering around the Cave, pausing to examine something he doesn’t recognize. When Tim comes out from the locker area, Jason’s head swivels around. 

This time Tim has no plausible reason for Jason to blush but blush he does as he looks over Tim. Deciding to ignore it, Tim finishes drying his hair and lets the towel sit around his shoulders. He nods towards the exit up to the manor. 

The trip up is uneventful. Alfred appears beside them as they emerge from the Cave and holds out a neatly folded pile of clothes. Jason takes them gratefully and ducks away to the nearest bathroom while Tim makes his way to the kitchen. With so few in the house, it’s rare they sit down in the family dining room and, as he anticipated, Alfred has dinner spread out on the nook tucked away in the corner of the kitchen. The food looks delicious, smells delicious, but Tim’s itching to leave and he knows, if he sits down with everyone, he’ll get wrangled into staying. 

From behind, Jason appears once more and Dick follows after, hovering as one does when their little brother has been demoted to extra tiny little brother. Jason, for the most part, takes it with grace by giving Dick only one heated glare over his shoulder. Jason comes to stand before Tim then Dick falls into line too. He descends on the food, plating it up and chattering away. Tim indulges him, hums where he needs to and answers any questions Dick throws his way, but Jason stays quiet. 

He doesn’t make a move to grab any food for himself which is not Tim’s problem. Jason has shown he remembers living in the manor, being Robin and Bruce’s son, so there’s no reason he can’t help himself. Tim leaves him to it so he can dig around in the pantry for one of the energy bars he knows he squirreled away in the back when he moved out for exactly this situation. As he’s shutting the pantry door, victorious with a couple bars in his hand, Jason is looking at him. He’s eyeing the food in Tim’s hand then looking at Alfred’s spread like it’ll bite him. 

It takes a second for the pieces to click together but Ra’s doesn’t call Tim Detective for no reason.

Sidling up to Jason’s side, he holds out one of the bars which Jason takes hesitantly. 

“I get it. I can grab more if you want,” Tim tells him kindly. 

Jason looks ready to beat him with the protein bar as he hisses, “What would you know, rich boy? Don’t think I haven’t noticed your Bristol accent.”

“Packaged food is safe, right?” Tim asks him rhetorically, his voice cold. Jason’s comment rubs him the wrong way. “Don’t have to worry about something being in it or being spoiled. Hard habit to shake when you fall back on old conditioning.”

Jason flinches back. 

“Hey, you guys coming?” Dick asks through a mouthful of food from where he’s seated at the table.

“Nah, neither of us is very hungry,” Tim lies smoothly. “We’ll probably grab a couple snacks.”

Dick looks upset about the change in course, frowning around another forkful of food. Like magic, Alfred sweeps into the room before Dick can protest. 

“Perhaps retire to the sitting room? I can have an assortment of snack items brought in. I dare say a calm night in would do this family good.” There’s a knowing glint in Alfred’s eye.

Remembering Dick’s propensity for cuddles and Jason’s resistance to it, Tim bumps Jason’s shoulder as he says, “What do you think? Or do you want to pick?”

“Library, I’d prefer the library,” Jason says automatically.

Alfred smiles without smiling. “Very good, Master Jason. I’ll bring a few things up to you and Master Tim if you’d like to go get settled now.”

“Actually-” Tim tries to interject. Jason will be fine. From what Tim’s learned, the library is Jason’s safe space, he’ll have food to eat and he’ll have Alfred to help him through. Tim isn’t needed. He’s not even sure why he’s being so nice.

It’s not them. With no idea on how to overcome the bad blood between himself and Jason, Tim hasn’t tried to repair their relationship and Jason hasn’t made any effort to either. Really, Tim should’ve left Jason to Dick and Alfred back in the cave. Putting his foot down would’ve had him gone already, sitting in his nest and ordering pizza while going over his active cases. 

But Jason looks so lost. He’s fronting, falling on the familiar anger and confidence he’s always had. He’s regressing back into a mindset more befitting the streets now that he’s so uncomfortable and likely feeling cornered. It’s so unlike the Jason Tim knows. Jason’s always been full of piss and vinegar but this softer version? It makes Tim’s heart hurt a little but in a way he can’t ignore. 

Like Jason has read Tim’s mind, his hand wraps around Tim’s wrist again and he pulls him out of the kitchen.

Leading them into the foyer and up the stairs, with his back to Tim, he asks, “How did you know? About the food.”

Taken aback by Jason’s aggressive exit and his new role as a tow-along, the truth slips out. “Uh, my parents. They left me alone a lot and forgot sometimes about the groceries. I got sick a couple times from eating spoiled stuff so I stuck to non-perishables.”

In answer, Jason grunts. “That’s fucked up.”

“My therapist agrees.”

“You have a therapist?”

Tim laughs. “Of course not. What respectable Bat does?”

When Jason laughs with him, it shakes loose something warm in Tim’s chest. He shakes away the feeling as Jason pushes into the library. Once they’re inside, Jason releases him. He doesn’t move right away, instead choosing to stand and survey the room.

Working on another hunch, Tim walks past Jason to a closet tucked away in the corner. Throwing the door open, he gatherers as many of the pillows and blankets inside as he can fit in his arms, kicks the door shut and dumps his haul on the bay window overseeing the back gardens. He arranges it all to make a comfortable looking nest. Once done, he nods in approval and gives himself a pat on the back. He cracks open the window as a finishing touch and presents his handiwork with a flourish.

“Easy exit, sight lines to all access points and extra pillows perfect for relaxing,” Tim says. Jason stays locked looking at him so Tim raises a brow. “Are you going to grab a book or stare at me all day?”

Jason jolts out of whatever trance he’d fallen into and quickly says, “Yeah, yep, I’ll go do the book thing with the reading.”

Tim smiles fondly as Jason trots into the shelves to retrieve a book. Tim can hear Jason as he searches for a book. The sounds are not encouraging. There’s a lot of murmured curses, grunting and frustrated growls. Once more, Tim resigns himself to helping out Jason. It doesn’t feel as much like a chore anymore.

“Issues?” Tim calls.

“They’re all 1st editions!” Jason yells back. “Who does that?”

“Give me a second,” Tim hollers back. 

Because Tim had a hard time leaving well enough alone as a kid, he knows Jason’s old room has several well worn copies of Jason’s favorites. Ones that could get thrown in a fire and he’d be out a couple bucks to replace it, cheap copies he can use over and over again till the pages are fraying and the spines have separated. Tim picks the lock on Jason’s old room and grabs a couple of the most worn down paperbacks. A young Tim may have been armed with curiosity and a lack of boundaries but he didn’t go so far as to read Jason’s favorites. Definitely not. That wasn’t a thing. 

Back in the library, Jason has settled into the seat of the bay window. He holds out the books to Jason who takes them and inspects each. 

“Are you a mind reading meta or something?” Jason asks him suspiciously. 

“No, nothing like that,” Tim replies.

“So someone just fucked you up real good like me?”

Grinning ruefully, Tim shrugs. “I like to think I turned out alright.”

“Yeah, you did.” Jason clamps his mouth shut after his off hand comment and his face goes red. Suddenly, he’s a lot more focused on the books in his hands than talking to Tim.

Tim’s not touching that with a ten foot pole but it’s still amusing. He settles on the floor, content to wait for Alfred, snacks and the excuse that it’s getting late so he can slip away guilt-free.

“You’re seriously going to sit down there?” Jason eventually asks to break the companionable silence between them. 

Seeing a possible out, Tim responds, “I can go somewhere else if you’d rather be alone?” He doubts it since Jason has imprinted on him or somehow deemed Tim a safe person and latched on but a man can hope.

When he looks up, he meets Jason’s eye. The blush is back in full force. “No, I don’t like being alone,” he admits grudgingly. 

The something warm in Tim’s chest is back again, stronger than before. It makes his brain soupy, or it’s the exhaustion and need for sleep. Either way, Tim tells him, “Neither do I.”

“So get up here,” Jason demands. Very pointedly, Tim looks at the bay window and the distinct lack of space to fit an extra person. Aggressively opening one of his books, scowling at the pages, Jason mutters, “Just fucking get up here.”

When Jason hops out of burrow of blankets and points at the window seat, Tim figures he can humor him. What’s the harm, after all? If anything it proves the point that although it is incredibly comfortable with the way Tim layered the blankets there’s no way they could both fit. He spreads his arms wide to encompass the fact that there isn’t enough room for them to share. 

The humor drains right out of him as Jason steps up to the window, his expression twists together in a curious mix of angry fear and climbs into Tim’s lap. Tim would like to amend that. Jason awkwardly climbs up into his lap. Actually, it is super awkward. 

Tim’s so stunned by the forwardness of the actions that all the words he wants to push past his lips get stuck and die on his tongue. 

Like this is any old day and not what’s shaping up to be one of the weirdest days of Tim’s life, Jason scooches over as far as he can till his back is pressed against the window. He’s half turned towards the ceiling but tucked tightly against Tim’s side. It’s not cuddling, not really with Tim’s arm pinned between them and Jason doing his best to squeeze back so they don’t touch even though it’s unavoidable. It is tangentially related to cuddling though. 

Jason starts reading. Tim starts staring at him blankly.

“You’re shit at cuddling,” Jason grumbles.

As if Tim’s brain couldn’t break anymore, here comes a teenage Jason to bulldoze over the semblance of a higher thinking he’d been able to scrape together. With his mind officially offline, Tim’s mouth takes the wheel.

“I haven’t had much practice.”

Taking Tim’s arm, he pulls it out from between them and sits up enough he can get it around his shoulders. Once satisfied, he grabs Tim’s other arm and drapes it around his chest as he lies fully on his side. He even nuzzles into Tim’s chest then goes back to reading.  

What.

“My mom used to cuddle me like this,” Jason whispers, eyes never leaving the pages of his paperback.

How is Tim supposed to handle that? He is not equipped for this. They have officially bumbled, dived head first, into things better handled by Dick. Or Steph. Or Cass. Not Tim. But is he mad about it? He has to stop and think about that.

Tim tightens his arms and scoots down a little to get into a more comfortable position. He’s no expert on cuddling but it seems like something that can take a while. Until Jason is back to his fire-fed-gasoline attitude, Tim can deal with this, he decides. He’s already caved to every other whim Jason has had, has helped him feel more centered when his entire world has shifted, so he may as well stop fighting it so much and get it over with before Jason gets the chip back on his shoulder. It’s like ripping off a bandaid. 

Sleepily, Jason asks him, “You keep watch, yeah?”

Patting his arm, Tim hums, “Yeah, no worries. I’ll be the look out.”

[rei-ismyname]

Exceptional X-Men #6 review

Thank fuck this issue was released on the same day as Uncanny #10. I don't really get tired of dunking on that book, but I'd much rather celebrate something positive. Exceptional continues to be the best, and Ewing nails an internal conflict hinging on intersectionality while advancing the team's progression and building towards a BIG BAD.

That's right, a big bad. Maybe not the biggest bad, but a dangerous and versatile dandy that's been racking up a mutant body count for centuries. Yeah, it's Mister Sinister. He's not in this issue, but they haven't been trying very hard to hide it. More on him later, we've got a Danger Room cold open.

It's not clear how much time has passed since the last issue but everyone is growing in confidence and skill. Everyone (including Bobby) is getting along well and it's nice to see them grow as a team. Kate had told Bobby to fuck off and didn't want to talk about the ORCHIS war, but that ended up happening anyway. It's a little jarring for Kate to change her mind there without any kind of further discussion, but this book has earned my trust and it'll likely be addressed later. My assumption is that when Melee accepted Kate warts and all, Kate did the same thing with Bobby. However, Kate turning her back on the X-Men and deconstructing what is and isn't acceptable is the premise of the book. Exceptional is crossing over with X-Manhunt next issue so maybe plans had to change.

After training the teenagers are ravenous so Emma reflexively goes to order food. The kids take the opportunity to assert their independence, explicitly not wanting to be financially dependent on Emma. I love this. It's a very teenage desire to be more adult, but it also touches on an aspect of the X-Men that's been creepy from the start - the power imbalance that being reliant on someone for your survival creates. Whether it's parents, caretakers, partners (often when someone, usually a woman, sacrifices their career to raise children) - that person has power over you and power can be abused. I wrote recently about how Cyclops was 100% dependent on Xavier for ALL his needs as well as feeling personally indebted to him. Same deal with Kitty. If leaving is realistically not an option, are you really making a choice? If leaving as a teenager means you'll be homeless with no income or support system it's not an appealing option. I left an abusive home with no resources a few weeks before my 13th birthday and surviving was incredibly challenging, to put it lightly. The alternative was worse, and my bio parent knew they had that leverage. I'm not equating my situation to Xavier's school, but the power dynamics are similar.

Emma looks taken aback - she's very used to being the X-Men's bank when Warren isn't around, and she may have never thought of it. She was reliant on an abusive father as a teen, but had the power to make her own way. Most don't. It's likely Emma sees her ability to pay as tied to her value to the team too. Kate loves it. I'm sure a big part of it is reflecting on her own teenage years, but there's got to be some pride and joy in seeing these young people advocate for themselves in a way she wasn't able to.

The flipside of that is these poor bastards are Gen Z or even younger. Financial independence is incredibly difficult to achieve by yourself, especially as a mutant. It's an outside context problem for the adults, as they grew up in a time where jobs grew on trees and the certainty of renting forever (without wealthy parents) was unthinkable. The kids don't want to be bankrolled, but they're comfortable asking for support navigating their independence. They want help getting jobs. It's a whole discussion where Emma is pushing back with a dose of realism, and then Kate's housemate Priti strolls in with 3 jobs all at the same place. We should be suspicious of this.

They agree to give it a go and are ushered very quickly into 'internships' at Verate (the app Melee's cousin was using) that are all of a sudden consultant positions. The kids are taken aback but roll with it, and let's be honest - this is weird shit. Priti has shown herself to be a reasonable and conscientious person and she's acting out of character. I think Sinister got to Priti. It certainly fits his MO - he has done shit like this before and he loves fucking with mutants/DNA in general.

They all have a brief meeting before meeting the boss, and Melee suggests Axo use their powers to make a good impression, something Bronze thinks is shady. It's all light-hearted but there's no time to think before they're in yet another meeting. Sheldon Xenos (Greek for 'foreigner') has literal horns but comes across as friendly. The team really improvises to try to learn as to what the hell is going on.

Xenos gives his elevator pitch about a dream that's incredibly vague. Heh, where have I heard that before? Bronze and Melee are not vibing with any of this and ask a few questions before Priti ushers them out to another meeting, leaving Axo alone with Xenos. Not weird or targeted at all.

Axo is pretty open minded as usual, perhaps to the point of naivete here. However, he is a very visible mutant and being able to potentially change or mitigate that clearly has some appeal. He's the only one in the book who has to deal with that specific visibility. Xenos is saying exactly what he wants to hear and Axo is definitely listening.

Once they leave, the other two list all the reasons why an app like this is problematic (just like 23&me. Fuck that shit.) They expect Axo to agree on principle but it's not that simple for him.

He's still keeping an open mind, but he feels a kinship with another visible mutant and shares his reasoning. Considering other people's lived experience can be a really difficult thing to do, especially if it's not something you're educated about. There are so many different ways people experience privilege and oppression - when these axes intersect it can get messy. In this group of young people, Alex has male privilege and won't experience the gendered oppression the others do. Unlike Bronze and Melee, he can't pass as human - something they're mostly unfamiliar with. I have an invisible disability and I'm queer but I have no idea what being a mutant (visible or otherwise) or a woman of colour is like. It's not a competition (at all) - but understanding how other people, even members of the same minority group, experience oppression can be challenging as hell.

The next day we get a taste of what Alex's life as a visible mutant is like. He's used to it, but do you ever really get used to something like that? He's up early for a meeting with Xenos, who is really working him with compliments and gratitude. He makes a vague offer of a job but is cut off by a stranger.

A couple tries to mug them but Axo uses both his powers and his martial training to deescalate. The whole situation is so out of nowhere and dramatic that I have to think it's a set-up for Axo's benefit. Love bombing of sorts. I get the feeling Xenos is a predator wearing the skin of a non-passing mutant to weaponise solidarity while wearing Alex down. Total Sinister move, and pretty uncomfortable abuser behaviour intended to isolate someone.

We get a glimpse of his home life which looks pretty nice! Interested in his well-being and prospects, generally seems like a nice family. His dad seems to think he's behaving strangely, which is telling. The pressure of visibility and Xenos' influence is causing him to withdraw.

It's just a few panels but it seems like Kate is dating Nina. We saw their first date at a soccer match but I think going to her grandma's 90th implies some kind of commitment. Add a kiss on the cheek to that and it's about as much WLW visibility as Marvel is generally willing to show. Have them make out you cowards.

Kate has doubts about the whole thing though Emma says she looks like she's on cloud nine. The doubts are obviously about herself and her ability to be around 'regular' people. People who haven't been a child soldier since they were 13, etc. Kate is a white woman with no visible mutations - while she can walk amongst the normies easily her experiences and trauma make her feel isolated. She asks Emma's opinion but she is not the right person to ask. Emma feels like a dam that's about to burst. She's trying so hard to keep it together but I think she's struggling just as much as Kate. Watch this space.

They don't get to delve any deeper into that (and Emma clearly doesn't want to right now) because the kids are back and want their input. The kids have dug their feet in on their original positions and Kate has reservations. Axo is really getting ganged up on here, the poor guy, and pushes back on these micro aggressions pretty quickly with the fact that he is visible unlike everyone present. Everyone except Emma is fired up, leaving her to play peacemaker and advise Kate that she's pushing boundaries here. Alex is hurting and feeling isolated, he pleads that maybe there are actually altruists in the world. Oof, bad luck that he's in an X-Men book.

This situation and conflict works so well because everyone's position is believable and defensible. Alex is informed by the daily reminder that he's different, something he can't escape. He's explaining it, and he's being heard, but he's not being understood. Take a situation like AvX, where nobody can communicate like an adult without the plot breaking. It's frustrating to read because your intelligence is not being respected. A group of messy mutants all with different values and lives failing to understand the POV of a friend whose life experience is different to theirs feels like a real argument. They all care about each other and have valid concerns, but a failure of understanding leads to breakdown in communication. Plus, their beliefs are in opposition right now and Axo doesn't appreciate being spoken down to.

This book slaps, and this situation is an excellent example of the verisimilitude Ewing manages to give these characters. It's a tragedy in slow motion, but you can see exactly how it happened. Everyone is in character and they've been maneuvered into organic conflict. The final panels of the issue are Xenos paying off and thanking the muggers. It doesn't make Alex's position any less sympathetic, in fact it shows how someone might groom or isolate a vulnerable person without making light of it. Whether Xenos is Sinister or a frontman for him he is working towards his ends. I think Sinister himself in his place would look ridiculous and obvious - Xenos is calculated to appeal to Axo. I'm scared for him. Sinister is a fucking monster.

After Bronze and Melee had their focus issues, Axo's did not disappoint. Taking the thread of Verate that ran through last issue and putting it front and centre makes it feel like a threat that everyone is invested in and underestimating. You can't punch an app. This thread of intersectionality getting in the way of solidarity is compelling and I want more.

Next issue is part of X-Manhunt, and I'm really pumped to hear what Kate and Emma have to say to Charles Xavier (and what he'll have to say for himself - likely nothing). The kids will have never met him, but he's world infamous and they'll have opinions too, we hope. Exceptional X-Men is the best X-Book of From The Ashes by far, and just excellent on its own merit. 🔥🔥

[regainingparadise]

Gerry's "(softly) Yeah, I'm sorry" / "I said I was sorry!" thing has been living rent free in my brain, because I think it actually says so much about his history with Mary.

I mean, overall, he's a lot more at ease here with Gertrude than he's ever been in described interactions with statement-givers. He's free from his mother's abuse, and while he doesn't fully trust Gertrude (and she certainly doesn't trust him enough to share a good portion of what she knows), in this scene overall it's apparent that they have a reasonably comfortable dynamic.

But this moment, Gertrude scolding him and Gerry switching back and forth between defensive and apologetic? I can't help but feel like this is him falling back to a dynamic he had with Mary. He was always a disappointment, he was always trying to find a way to avoid her anger.

He has spent so much of his life "in trouble" with his mother, that he can't really handle it emotionally when Gertrude berates him.

But in fact, Gertrude isn't Mary. Mary wouldn't "say no more about it," but Gertrude can recognize Gerry's trauma response, the trapped desperation in "I said I was sorry!" And she lets it go.

On a related note, this kind of parallel of Gerry & Mary with Gerry & Gertrude was in my brain when I wrote my latest Gerry fic

Psychologists called the phenomenon learned helplessness. An animal subjected to stressors from which they could not escape, would eventually give up trying to escape altogether.

-----

"And in the end, it was Gertrude who saved me. She came to me when I was desperate, nowhere to go, and she offered to help. I just had to make sure I took the book while my mum was fading, and brought it to her, and then she would free me."

-----

Gertrude visits a desperate Gerard at Pinhole Books

----

Category: Gen

Fandom: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)

Relationships: Gerard Keay & Gertrude Robinson; Gerard Keay & Mary Keay

Characters: Gertrude Robinson; Gerard Keay; Mary Keay

Additional Tags: Mary Keay's A+ Parenting; POV Gertrude Robinson; Angst

[yoyomomiko]

WINTER SPECIAL

DAY 1 - Tanjiro★

╰┈➤ [ while helping you decorate your house for the holidays, tanjiro notices how tired and sick you look. he refuses to let you continue working, insisting on letting him take care of you. ]

-> m.list

-> WINTER SPECIAL - demon slayer m.list

(a/n): okay so this is by far the cringiest thing i've ever wrote ewww!! i'm so sad it ended up like this, sorry :(( i've also had this in my drafts since november >.<

You huffed as you raised back up from your squatting position, feeling your head start to go under static as there were black spots blurring your vision. Your hand gently went through your hair, the cold skin of your palm touching your warm forehead.

It's been so long since you've had enough amount of sleep, or a good meal at that. You started feeling weaker, finding it hard to properly do chores around the house. If Tanjiro hadn't offered help with decorating around the house for the holidays, you would've passed out from exhaustion by now.

"Ah, do you think Giyuu will like my gift?" Tanjiro asked, his voice energetic and immediately echoing off the walls. "I tried my best to find something fit for him! I don't really know what he truly likes..." He admitted with a nervous chuckle.

"I'm sure he will, Tanjiro. He appreciates anything you give him." You replied, a smile adorning your lips as you tried to soothe the heat from your forehead using the back of your cold hand.

Tanjiro gave a smile and a quick head nod back, turning around to pick up one of the many origami birds he'd built with you to decorate your Christmas tree. He turned back around, gazing towards you while holding the paper origami in his hand. His smile faltered slightly upon noticing your tired look.

"I wanted to make some paper lanterns too. It looks a bit bland!" You stated, admiring your work so far.

"I think you should rest for a while..." He suggested, one of his hands gently brushing a strand of hair behind your ear, as all you could do was feel more heat rush up to your face.

"Why? I'm- I'm not tired, if that's what you meant..." You formed a response, shaking your head. You were lying, of course, but Tanjiro didn't need to know that!

"Please be honest... I noticed how you looked throughout the whole day. I saw you when you lost your balance, and how you told Kanroji about your headache. If I'm not mistaken, you're sleep deprived." He noted all of that, his hand now resting on your shoulder.

"I'll do the rest, if... If you want to, of course. Or maybe we can continue another day... No matter what you choose, I'll refuse to let you tire yourself out even more." He added, gently handing you the origami bird from his hand.

You stared up at him in awe, a faint pink tint covering your cheeks as your eyes went wide with raised eyebrows. The corners of your lips tugged upwards, forming a small smile on your face. You glanced away, looking anywhere but at him.

"It's fine, really!" You shook your head, closing your eyes as you chuckled slightly.

"It's not! You're gonna end up passing out!" He exclaimed, shaking his head aggressively as his hands criss crossed continuously, earning a giggle from you.

It's so sweet how he cares so much. He's always so kind to everyone, and that's why you ended up developing a small crush on him. Well, if 'small' meant thinking about him every single second, always wanting to speak to him and trying to get his attention as much as you could. Yeah, small crush!

"Tanjiro..." You started, a small smile on your face. "I'm fine."

Tanjiro let out a sigh, all of the sudden taking both your hands in his. "Let's rest, okay?" He suggested, making it clear he won't back down.

You felt your cheeks starting to heat up, which probably meant you were blushing.

"Are you alright?" Tanjiro asked, his soft eyes fixed on you. "You're turning red..." He pointed out, his tone laced with concern.

You nodded, blinking a few times. Tanjiro smiled again, letting go of one of your hands, still holding the other. He gently pulled you to sit down with him.

"See?" He started, letting go of your hand, yet you still felt his touch. "Better now that we're sitting, right?"

"I guess..." You replied as you now sat in awkward silence.

He chuckled, and gosh it was such a beautiful sound. Music to your ears. His eyes crinkled and if you were honest it was the cutest thing you've seen that day.

Maybe one day you'll find the courage to confess, admit to how much you truly love him. Maybe one day...

★yoyomiko ★miko

[drowninginredink]

20 fanfic author questions, because i was tagged by @seanwinchester and @spnyuri. They both actually tagged me on @schizosamwincester, but I talked a lot about non SPN stuff and i wanted to tag non SPN people so I'm doing it on my main instead.

1. How many works on AO3?

48, apparently. Damn that's a lot. Also there are some on my old fanfiction.net that I should really upload to AO3 at some point and still haven't, so I have written more fic than that.

2. Total AO3 Word Count?

89,208, but again, I will mention that there's a 32k word fic that's only on fanfiction.net. And again, I should really get around to putting it on AO3.

3. Top 5 fics by Kudos

Follow My Lead (Smosh)

You sound absurd, even if you're right (Supernatural)

Sister (Supernatural)

Should I explain myself? I'd rather read the dictionary (Smosh)

Don't you think you would feel better then? (Smosh)

4. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently I've been very Supernatural brained, but I've written for A Series of Unfortunate Events in the past and will definitely again in the future. Whenever I stop writing about supernatural for 5 minutes. My Smosh RPF phase is decidedly done, but I just have the feeling I'll write one more fic in it one day? Don't ask me what. And then way back in high school I wrote To Kill a Mockingbird and Harry Potter (*vomits*)

5. Do you respond to comments?

When I remember that according to social conventions i really should, yes. I do have a tendency to be like "oh that's a short comment. It doesn't require a response" but I'm trying to be better about that and still thank people for one sentence comments.

6. Angstiest Ending?

Oh that's hard. That's really hard. Because that isn't the same thing as saddest ending. Angst is a bit more self centered and a bit less valid. I could answer saddest. But angstiest? I write too much angst to know the answer to that. And I don't know which type of angst is more angst. Right now I'll say "Like flies from your face" (Supernatural) but I don't love that answer.

7. Fic with the Happiest Ending?

Oh that's easy. My Smosh phase was the one time in my life I wrote stuff that wasn't even a little depressing. It's either "Follow my Lead" or "Don't you think you would feel better then?" which are both linked above.

8. Do you get hate?

Not on my fic. Got some on tumblr a while ago now, but never on AO3 or directed at my fic.

9. Do you write smut?

Hell yeah! Not a ton because smut is really another kind of action scene and writing actions is the thing I like the least, and also because a lot of my ideas are sexual but the flow would be ruined by in-depth sex scenes, but I have and I will again.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nah. No shade to those who do, but that is not how my brain works. I predominantly write fic as a form of literary analysis, which means I don't have a ton of use for fully changing the setting of things these days.

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

Not like, completely stolen, but there was that time someone's fic had a very specific idea that mine also had, and they left kudos on my fic so i know they read it, and then when someone asked about it they denied ever having read it. Which, I would have been perfectly fine with all of that and taken it as a compliment if they credited me. It's the not even mentioning me, and then denying they'd even seen it, that I took issue with.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No. I mean if anyone wanted to I'd let them, but God I'd never ask anyone to do that much work.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

God no. I could never write with someone else. Absolutely not.

14. All time favourite ship?

I'm aro as all hell so the real answer to this is no ship. No ship is the best ship. Write more gen fic I'm begging you. Especially gen fic that isn't about friendship. Write character studies! Write about acquaintances! Write the weird liminal relationships that we don't have words for.

... but anyway if I haaaaave to give a real answer deanjohn.

15. WIPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh my God so many. I'm a 20 WIPs at a time sort of person, which means I'm fully aware a decent chunk will never actually be finished. My real one that got away, at least at the moment, is this guy wrenching death fic I was writing for Smosh, and then life stuff happened so i was not in the emotional state to write a death fic, and then stuff changed so the ending no longer worked. Like, on the one hand it is very good that Smosh *finally* started giving Tommy Bowe his due and in real life I'm very happy about it. On my other, the bittersweet ending where he quit because he realized staying for friendship was bad when he could lose them at any moment and went somewhere that treated him better and had an entire career he never would have had if Spencer didn't die is ruined. And i apparently am incapable of thinking of a new ending, so it is doomed to be a forever WIP I guess.

16. Writing strengths?

I have a very consistent voice and style. Most things written by me take the same tone and shape. I have a good sense of what things come out well when written by me and how to pace and execute them. I have a unique style — you're going to recognize my writing most of the time. I think it's a style that sticks well in people's heads.

17. Writing Weaknesses?

Action. Good lord I hate writing any kind of action. And while I write actual dialogue well, I never like any of my dialogue tags or the other prose around it.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

What a weirdly specific question. I honestly can't say I really see it done very often, except in the kinds of porn that I am not reading for the quality of their dialogue. But uh, go for it if you want?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Is it exactly a fandom if there were only 4 of you writing it, all on fanfiction.net in 2018? Well, we count it. I read To Kill a Mockingbird in School, went "haha, I bet weirdos have written fanfic of this," immediately discovered it was in fact a goldmine for hurt and angst, and that was it for me. I've been a fic writer ever since.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Uh... You know what? Honestly? If I really think about it? One of my first ones for To Kill a Mockingbird. I don't think I've had the chance to write a death that good since. I just put it on AO3, since I'm talking about it now. Not Even a Nightmare

Yay tags! Absolutely no pressure to anyone because I know this is extremely long. @ven10 @weirdthoughtsandideas @buncoreclown @idjits-areus @ebenelephant @lumalite @70snasagay @incesthemes

[hopeswriting]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (if you’d like). Spread the self-love ♥️

hello birdie. <3 thanks for the ask!

oof, okay let's see. one or two comes to mind, but i don't know if i can choose only five of them zqfsfcfd. 😭😂

through the mirror (through your eyes) | KHR | T | Byakuran & Sawada Tsunayoshi & Uni | Yuni

i especially like the first chapter, idk. i like a little less the last one compared to the other two lol, but yeah. i love this one for the way it's kind of a snapshot of the dynamic between these three, where i only captured the most defining moments of them knowing each other, the turning points of them knowing each other, and you're left to infer on the dynamic as a whole and in and of itself by your own.

let someone else stay (oh, please, let him leave too, let him leave too) | KHR | T | Arcobaleno & Skull, Colonnello/Skull

a skull-centric fic, are we surprised lmao. more seriously tho, i love writing about skull and his immortality, and this fic is my favorite way i've done it so far. idk. the... atmosphere in this one? skull's mental state. the way he bonds with the arco. or well, more accurately, the way the arco have to try and bond with him. the overall vibes of the fic. idk, just!!!! the fic as a whole has a very unique feel to it that i never did before and have yet to do again, and i'm just super proud and happy of how it came out.

hand in hand (blood in between) | KHR | G | Sawada Tsunayoshi & Vongola Tenth Generation Guardians

i've been describing this fic as the one i wouldn't change a single word of it ever since i published it, and like. yeah. to this day, i'm amazed that i still feel like this every time i reread it haha. i just really wouldn't change a single word of it. which is crazy to me because i wrote this one in, like, one setting. two tops, but it should be just one iirc. yet i think it's the best example of what my prose at its best can look like. i also love how... simple it is? like, i love going on about what my characters are feelings lmao, but here i just let them speak for themselves with just the right amount of words they needed to do that, and the love the 10th gen have for tsuna (and back) is still unmistakable.

Love is... | KHR | T | Sawada Tsunayoshi & Vongola Tenth Generation, Ten Years Later Sawada Tsunayoshi & Ten Years Later Vongola Tenth Generation, Reborn & Sawada Tsunayoshi

among all of my fics, this one's probably the poster child of a fic written just for me and, like, three other people lmao. which is saying something because i've written luce/sky arco fics too. 😭😂 the second person pov will just do that to a fic. i used to be sad about it, and tho i still feel it a shame people who might enjoy the fic won't ever give it a chance because of the pov every now and then, i made peace with it and it never made me love this fic any less. like, the second person pov adds so much to it, and i really can't even imagine what it'd look like in another pov haha. apart from that, this is also one of the most beautiful fics i've ever written, which also happens to be one of the fics i've written the best full stop. just. love, love walking the journey with tsuna of him realizing just what brought them where they are now and how he could have never been able to change anything to it.

So young, and so doomed (Just a boy) | KHR | G | Checker Face | Kawahira & Skull

another skull-centric fic, are we surprised zefsdfds. 😭✌🏽 i don't remember anymore how i felt about the pairing when i first came up with it (it's from kawahira's pov too), but looking at it now, i think it's surprising the fic came out the way it did. like, i don't read kawahira fics so i have no way to compare, but i do know he's usually made to be the big bad guy haha. and as much as he's not... nice here either, as much as he still does what he has to do, he still unmistakably cares, and about skull first and foremost, which made for an interesting dynamic to explore. the fic also touches on immortality (and long lifespan when it comes to kawahira), so yeah, just. love the way it came out.

and here's my top 5! sorry i was unnecessarily wordy about it lol. the fics are all on ffnet too, but i'm too lazy to add the links. also please mind the tags and read them first before reading the fic.

also also!! there's other fics i'm incredibly proud of and are also examples of what my writing at its best can look like, but also. they're just not fics i'd say are my favorites too? which was an interesting realization to have haha.

anyway, this was fun to do, thanks again for the ask birdie! <3

[dapper-lil-arts]

Out of curiosity, have you read other MLP fanfics and if you did, what are your favorites?

Oh yeah, i read a few! Not many stand out in my brain, but let me look through my favorites list on fimfic: Writing friend of mine, Redhoodie21 writes lots of really fun compelling one-shots with wonderful prose, imma just send their whole catalogue lol. But this one is my favorite, Sunset Shimmer as an alienated warrior with mommy issues? Impecable This one stands out as a rare one where its sciset, when they're both still "evil", Sunset being an bitch and scitwi being a mad scientist and hitting it off. This one is probably my favorite comedy fic ever, it's just kind of hilarious and yet plausible that so many mares would activelly pursue AJ. The ending is a bit predictable but everything else is a baaaanger. The same writer also wrote a series where the Equestria girls cast hunts the undead and it has some badass mom principal celestia on it. Iconic as hell. Super inspiring and fun, having the EQG cast get to do insane badass stuff!

A friend of mine wrote tons of cute self indulgent fics, but the standout for me is one where Misty from gen 5 is trained by Sunset Shimmer to be better, stronger, cooler! Its super adorable and allows characters that would never ever meet in canon but have much in common to show their chemistries in some really fun ways!

This one's a classic, just good old fashioned sciset, one of the first fics I ever written, actually! I remember it fondly!

This one's an honest to goodness horror fic with rarijack! a pretty fun and chiling tale that has an incredibly well put together take on ghosts n shit. My only complaints are that they didn't even mack on each other and also we as a society need to acknoledge how funny this is: "Hey fellas is it gay that the phantom manifestation of your loneliness took the form of your best friend and you cuddle it at night for comfort?"

This one has two sequels, and it's another one of those comedy fics but this time, one that acknowledges that sex is hilarious, which it is

This right here feels like it was written specifically for me, catering to my interests, babey. Centuries old Twilight and Sunset as alicorns, ruling together having already advanced Equestria into a golden age and loving each other so, SO goddamn hard. and above all, we get a badass "WHERE'S MY WIFE" tale of an godlike shimmer lmao-- Something I've written myself!

Also I'm currently working on one of my most self indulgent works lmao, rewriting both Sunset's entire backstory and rewriting forgotten friendship all in the same story :)

[clangenrising]

I’ve also gotten really interested in making my clangen clans as genetically accurate as possible (with some leeway admittedly since I also want variety in colours and patterns). Certainly helps when the code for the cats is so accessible to change. To what extent are you making it as accurate as possible (like if cats have to be part bengal to get the bengal patterning etc)?

So I have a spreadsheet keeping track of every cat's genetic code (at least the genes I understand and know how to track.) I'll use The Rustique Kits as an example.

Here's my Key

Every cat has their own row that details their specific genes. Cats who are "first gen" or don't have any in game/in story parents, often have missing gaps in their genotype since I only know their phenotype for sure. Notice how Russetfrond and Mystique have several "?"s in their genes.

Those ?s are useful because they represent unknown genes that could be recessive traits passed down if I ever need them in their family trees. Some of these genes, like Russetfrond's recessive Dilute gene (d), weren't filled out until I wrote down Yellowkit and Bluekit's genes and knew that I needed them.

I do this with every cat in the Clan and most important cats outside the Clan too.

For things like Bengal, I don't know exactly how those genes work. There are some genes where nobody knows how they work, like widebanding if I'm remembering properly, and for those I'm mostly just going to do my best to make those genes make sense with the tools that I have.

I also heard that cat eye colors can't skip a generation so cats will always have one of their parents' eye colors, unless they have white spotting in which case they might have blue eyes.

So yeah, that's my process haha. I hope that was the kind of answer you were looking for!

[cartwrong]

20 Questions with a Fanfic Author

thank you for the tag @jamiesfootball <3

1. How many works on AO3? 25

2. Total AO3 Word Count? 65,746

3. Top 5 Fics by Kudos sometimes the short end of the stick is the sharpest (217 kudos) - River doesn’t notice the knife until it slides into his side. There’s no pain at first, only the feeling that something isn’t right, that something cold is now inside his body where it shouldn’t be. The pain comes later.

the ones that make you feel whole (184 kudos) - River knew he should call in sick; he knew that, but he was supposed to finish the reports Catherine had asked for yesterday. Catherine had barely been back at Slough House a month, and this was the third time River had failed to finish an assignment by its due date.

into the trees with empty hands (128 kudos) - Lamb and River are on the run in the woods, which would be a lot easier if Lamb didn't have a concussion and River didn't have a bullet hole in his leg.

hope the skin heals where the pain enters (101 kudos) - 19 year old River surprises Isobel and her new boyfriend puts him in the hospital.

i need your hand but i don't want to burn it (100 kudos) - River and Louisa in the immediate aftermath of season three.

4. What fandoms do you write for? Slow Horses and Ted Lasso as @jamietarttsnorthernattitude here and on ao3

5. Do you respond to comments? I do! it might take me a while to respond but I do my best to respond to everything!

6. Angstiest Ending? old habits die hard, people die easier technically, it's Lamb’s thoughts as he drives to David Cartwright’s house in 4x1 so he thinks River is dead, but he's not, so does that count?

7. Fic with the Happiest Ending? Yipee-ki-yay, Shirley Dander - Shirley gets to kill people and gets the girl

8. Do you get hate? no, everyone here has been very nice to me <3

9. Do you write smut? not really. i mostly write gen and most of my fics have not included smut but i do have a river x spider fic that doesn't really have smut but has some physical elements

10. Do you write crossovers? not yet

11. Ever had a fic stolen? not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? not that I know of.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic? no, I'm not sure if I'm made to cowrite

14. All time favorite ship? river cartwright and whump <3

15. WIPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will? none yet

16. Writing strengths? oh gosh, i don't know. Consistency?

17. Writing Weaknesses? the whole story. i tend to have An Idea and I start writing before outlining or anything like that so then I'm floundering. I don't plan out a story like i should with an inciting moment etc etc i just kind of wing it which I'm sure anyone reading this is like yeah i can tell, babe.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue? i think it adds something nice to fics and can be done really well

19. First fandom you wrote for? lotr a million years ago, one tiny stupid fic i wrote while high that is lost to time thankfully

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written? sometimes the short end of the stick is the sharpest but i also have a soft spot for revenge is a dish best served peeled it's just something silly that i enjoy

no pressure tags: @louisaguy @disappearinginq @tenderlywicked