#i wrote a line that made me laugh

[james-p-sullivan]

ive managed to write 3.7k words this month

its nowhere near where i was before the accident but fucking hell it feels good to not stare at an empty page while crying

[magnoliasandbeardedtooth]

thinking about the relationship between sif and the universe, and related theories / headcanons aka I listened to a song and I need to get these feefees out of me

this is a lot of prelude for something that can be shown with just the video clip, but I want to include all the strings that make up this knot

Its not explicitly stated, but I believe it's pretty clear that whenever sif repeats something three times while hoping for something (sharpening the keyknife, carving in general, praying to the change god statue in dormont), he is performing wish craft.

however, he doesnt repeat anything three times when getting the keyknife. he doesnt even need to pray to get it at all, the change god just gives it to him. they say themselves that they dont care for rituals. they never even take credit for the stat buff, they only take credit for the keyknife

when sif changes how they pray at the change god statue, their method more strongly resembles the ritual to make a wish at the favor tree (picking the one you like best), and as a result the buff gets better. it is the wish craft ritual that is the important part of the prayer to that statue, not the change god

one thing that IS explicitly stated is just how powerful wish craft is for those who know the rituals, and how dangerous it is in the wrong hands. between the disappearance of colors (Im pretty sure that was the result of a wish, I may be misremembering), the disappearance of the country, and the king being nearly successful in freezing all of vaugarde in time, it only takes one wish to take out massive chunks of the world at a time

we know that wish craft is very entwined in the culture of the country (the story written about in the journal is told as a cautionary fairy tale, the rituals themselves are so deeply ingrained in sif that the wish to forget the country did not restrict his memory of the rituals, and he can perform wish craft without even being fully aware he is doing it)

it seems reasonable to me that the reason for the country's disappearance was to hide the existence of wish craft and the rituals to access that power from the rest of the world. considering sif didnt even remember his culture AND had good intentions, and still nearly ended the world, seems like that concern is pretty well founded. however, thats not the important theory Im making this post about

the country has knowledge of wish craft in conjunction with worship of the universe. "the universe leads, we can only follow," "the universe willed it," seems pretty safe to say that sif's Universe is the "entity" that is granting wishes

the way wishes are described, they dont seem like something the universe grants based on who worships it. as long as you know the ritual, you get the wish. everyone is part of the universe, after all, worshiper or not

Admittedly, its a bit of a stretch to say that the universe as a collective force has any sense of empathy for human struggles. but using the change god as an example, as spiteful as they are to sif, and unsympathetic to anything other than a human's role in the concept of change, they still show a great deal of care and favor to mira, someone who loves them. it is possible for a deity to care for those that care about it

sif, despite no longer having access to his culture or why he cares about the universe, still loves the universe, very very deeply, just as much as mira loves change. the change god says that sif's deity will never answer him, but I dont think thats the case

and this is the important headcanon that I am making this post for

sif is performing the rituals, so he gets the wishes, simple as. but I feel strongly that his wishes getting granted in very small but noticeable ways, despite not knowing how or why hes doing it, is the presence of his universe helping him, caring for him, even when he doesnt remember it

the strongest evidence for this, and the basis for this whole thing, is exactly how euphrasie breaks down in act 5

at first I only really noticed when she laughs, it reminded me very much of how the change god, a being who uses sprites of other characters and has done a whole possession, laughed during their encounter. they and euphrasie are the only two that use anything other than "ha," and right after this laugh is when her breakdown pauses and she says the lines

"... Soon you'll be able to go back to your normal lives. Away from battle and strife. Finally, you'll all be able to go home!!!"

which, knowing the end of the game is coming, is incredibly relevant. very deliberate

before this pause, her breakdown seems pretty chaotic. the characters and the player are just coming out of one harrowing experience, and are clearly headed for another. the cohesiveness of this glitchy breakdown amongst a mess of the rest of the world doing the same isnt really high up on the list of priorities. none of the characters notice anything beyond the fact that reality is breaking, not even sif. it just sounds like scary nonsense.

but with the context of euphrasie being possessed to talk to sif, every single one of her lines makes perfect sense

(footage from Zhain Gaming on yt)

the universe is there its talking directly to him, it was there the whole time

the Universe loves Sif so much

[loverboybrightsideghost]

they weren't kidding, those bears can be in trees

[karamazovanon]

"[Raskolnikov] took a step, swayed, and collapsed on the floor in a faint. . . Razumikhin, who was standing on the threshold, flew into the room, took the sick man up in his powerful arms, and in an instant had him lying on the sofa."

was gonna draw him suplexing rodya on some WWE shit but a bridal carry is fine too ig

[ammoniteflesh]

I finally got around to ep1 of Vows & Vengeance. DA spin-offs sure do continue to have, uh, variable quality.

(I'm trying to find a nice way to say 'the writing was hilariously bad' and failing lol)

[skeletalheartattack]

remembering a dream i had, where i was visiting a family member who was showing us around the new house they moved into, and at some point i was desperately trying to find a bathroom, but not to do my business or whatever - i was specifically looking for a bathroom that had a mirror.

so i'm going around this persons house, going from bathroom to bathroom, trying to find a mirror because i guess i wanted to make sure my hair looked good, and for some reason, not a single bathroom had a mirror. eventually in my search, i run into the woman who can only be described as either my aunt or a representation of my mother, and i'm like "hey listen, do you have a mirror anywhere?" and she looks at me and laughs, and she says "oh honey we don't have any mirrors, we use god's most important invention" and then proceeds to hand me her phone.

[fruityumbrella]

sorry for liveblogging my reaction to your fic in the ao3 comments. it will happen again.

[hazzybat]

Poly!JO ficlet (legit it's tiny)

I'm not gonna make a full story out of this but I loved the very short intro I wrote so I'm gonna post it here cause I think you guys will like it

Bojan kneed Kris very hard in the balls in his mad dash to get to the bathroom before he threw up .

He ignored the gasping sound behind him and Jure's confused groan as he made it just in time to empty his stomach. He thought he could hear Nace ask "Kris are you good?" in a very sexy and very sleep filled voice.

Bojan might have drunk a bit too much if his pounding head and inability to move from the toilet seat was anything to go by.

He must have had a good night though if there was at least 3 other people in his bed. He heard pained wheeze followed by a shout of "AGAIN?"

Jan was suddenly next to him, half shoving him off as he too hurled into the toilet.

Bojan chuckled before messily stroking Jan's hair and tucking it behind his ear.

"What a romantic start to the morning" Bojan half whispered as he stared at Jan across the toilet bowl. Jan rolled his eyes.

"Next birthday we celebrate we are not fucking drinking" he groaned out.

[siren-of-agony]

Still not over that awesome possessive whumper piece of yours so here's another one . A whumper has let their whumpee be free for some time for whatever reason , but oh no they aren't able to reach them . They barge into whumpee's house and no sign of whumpee. Did another whumper take them perhaps 👀👀👀

Hi! It’s been 2 years since I got this request and I have now accepted that I will never actually write it-write it. But I need you to know that back when I got this ask, I spent multiple hours being incredibly unhinged w my love @for-the-love-of-angst and outlined this whole thing. So I‘m very sorry you’ll never get the full thing, here is what we had planned, a bit cleaned up

There are honestly no warnings because this is a literal Hallmark movie. Well, maybe pet whump if you squint very hard?

A Christmas Reunion

Establishing shot. A McMansion, absolutely decked out in kitsch christmas decoration. Snow is drifting lazily in front of a big window we zoom in toward. Through it, we enter a large living room, warm and cozy, with large couches in a u-formation. On the sides sit people of every age, including some children. On the middle couch, an old couple, maybe in their seventies, close together, holding hands, smiling at their family. At their feet, a person not much younger, their hands and ankles bound in what looks like Christmas wreaths. They seem annoyed. Child 1: Grandpa, Grandpa, will you tell us the story again? Of how Cinnamon saved Christmas and this family?

Grandpa Henry: Oh but I’ve told that every year, isn’t it getting boring?

Grandma Violet: I was there and I still want to hear it again! It’s a great story, Henry, love, let's not break tradition!

GH: All right, fine, fine. There was a time when my Violet and I didn’t get along quite as well as we do now-adays. We had been married for a few years, but we were fighting so often. We had made the decision to maybe spend some time apart, but couldn’t quite agree who our lovely Cinnamon would spend their time with.

We focus on GH free hand, reaching towards the hair of the person sitting in front of him. We see Cinnamon’s hair being pet, the annoyed expression on their face. A dreamlike rippling filter across the picture. We are entering a

FLASHBACK Another, slightly smaller McMansion. Movers are carrying boxes and furniture outside. A car drives up, parks haphazardly, and a Young Henry gets out, in a business suit, with a business bag, business hair. We understand: YH works too much and is never home. He is important in the field of business.

He runs towards the house and stops one of the movers.

YH: What are you doing in my house? With my furniture?

Mover: Your ex-wife gave us the official court documents. You should have gotten them, too. Didn’t your lawyer contact you to inform you we’d come over today?

YH curses. His lawyer had tried to call him, but he’d been too busy doing business.

YH enters his house. He ignores his stuff being carried out, making his way directly to a door with a small window, but he starts to unlock it without looking through. With a start, he realizes the door is unlocked already. He steps through the door. We see a nice room, cozily decorated. The big window has no unlocking mechanism. From the inside, the door has no handle, only a keyhole. YH looks around frantically. The room is empty. He unlocks his phone and calls somebody.

YH: Violet, you bitch! Where’s Cinnamon?

YV: Don’t talk to me like that! What do you mean?

YH: Where. Is. Cinnamon. I bought you another house, I gave you money, I gave you all my furniture. I get to keep Cinnamon! The court agreed! 

YV: But I didn’t agree! And anyway, I don’t have Cinnamon! Are you telling me you already lost our precious darling? I told you you spent too much time at work to care for them!

YH: If you don’t have them, where are they? Their room is empty! 

YV: You’re useless. I’m coming over. Search through Cinnamons room, maybe they’re just hiding. They must have gotten scared with all these changes.

YV hangs up. YH starts checking behind the curtains, under furniture. On the bed, almost covered by a pillow, he finds a note. He reads it out, as if he knows he’s in a movie and people might not be watching the screen

YH: ‘You’ve ruined my business deal with your smart business decisions and your wife’s gossiping revealing my affair. From the published court proceedings I know what you fought most about and I’ve decided to take it and destroy it, just how you destroyed my life. Getting them in that box wasn’t easy, but carrying it out, dressed as a mover. I will fit right in. You will never see your precious Cinnamon again.’

YH curses again, running to the door, where he sees YV already running towards him

[Here we enter the part I had never fully planned out, but imagine a full on heist movie with this divorced couple trying to rescue their pet from a sadistic Whumper and falling in love with each other all over again.]

They stand back in their McMansion, empty except for the twig of mistletoe above them, a young Cinnamon still bound and gagged and slightly bloody sitting on the floor between them. They kiss passionately. The camera pans down to YC’s face. We recognize the annoyed expression. Ripple effect - FLASHBACK ENDS

We’re back in the living room from the first scene

GH: And that’s how we saved Cinnamon and Cinnamon saved us!

Old Cinnamon: I hate you all.

GV: It did break our heart, of course, when we told Cinnamon they could wish for anything they wanted for surviving such an ordeal, and instead of maybe a cozier couch, they wanted a bit more freedom, but who are we to go back on our word.

OC: I told you I wanted you to leave me the fuck alone.

GH: And we do, almost always, do we not! We understand that even family spends some time apart, but the holidays are a time to get together! 

OC: You really don’t need to abduct me every year, though. Do you know how embarrassing it is if someone asks you to come over for Christmas and you have to be like “Nah, I’m going to get abducted again.”

Everyone laughs heartily. Cinnamon is struggling against their bonds.

OC: Also, how often do I have to tell you that I go by Monroe now?

GV: Oh sweetheart, you'll always be our little Cinnamon. Now stop struggling against, you'll just hurt yourself again, and you'll have to cut the roast later!

OC: I’ll cut you.

GV: Cinnamon, Christmas is the holiday of LOVE!

OC: That’s Valentine’s day, you dumb fuck.

The camera starts moving back, through the window we first entered through. We exit the McMansion, still shining in warm light, vague Christmas conversation audio going on. The snow falls heavier. The last shot is a person from behind, we see their gray hair and recognize the sadistic Whumpers favourite Christmas sweater. In their hand, a knife

~FIN~

[lineffability]

hey wanna read a fic where, after some pain and talking, you reap the rewards of Aziraphale taking Crowleys sunglasses gently off his face? ....yeah

[grimrester]

ive been playing my time at sandrock and this is one of very few farming games where i have some real trouble picking who to romance

there is one lone teenager and the bulk of the romance options are mid-20s or older. it's far cry from some farm sims where everyone is like, 21 at best and i get to feel vaguely uncomfortable the whole game. they gave me not one but TWO awkward dudes who want to ramble at me about their special interests. one romance option has a "can u show me how to hold the gun 🥺" scene that may as well be a recreation of a scene from my sniper/reader fic. one is a friendly rival archetype. one has a pet bird that u have to communicate with. one mentions a niche subtype of architecture and gets excited when you recognize it. im eating sooooo good here

[whatwouldmickeydo]

tagged by a bunch of lovely flower petals, thank you bbs 😘🌸 @gallawitchxx @squidyyy23 @metalheadmickey @gardenerian

rules: post the first lines of your last 10 fics/chapters posted on AO3 (if you have less than 10 fics posted, post the first lines of all your fics) and try to draw some conclusions.

——-

Mickey (3:56): Yo, I’m here where u at? - Keep The Porch Light On

“This place is gay as fuck.” - Wonders Never Cease

The air mattress is not conducive for the types of activities they like, something they figured out as soon as they had blown it up and attempted to fool around, both of them falling off several times until they ended up just fucking on the wall by the window - Good

“Someone’s stealing my fucking tomatoes!” - Ian and Mickey and the Case of the Stolen Tomatoes

“Bye Finn, happy birthday!!” - I’ll Keep Walking Towards the Sound of Your Voice

Thinking about road trips, about the two of them deciding to try it again except this time there’s no heartbreak and devastation waiting for them at the end, no having to look over their shoulders every second. - Take my hand, we'll make it I swear

Mickey’s never really given much thought to flirting. - Mickey Milkovich’s Guide to Flirting

“You guys should come visit soon!” - wrap those arms around me darling

He blows into town at the ass crack of dawn on a Tuesday morning, nothing but sheer force of will and Mickey's own special brand of magick all that's keeping the car together. - Tender Hearts and Other Maladies

Conclusion: I love starting with dialog apparently, or I’m writing a long ass paragraph because I can’t shut up

——-

tagging some more flower petals 🌸✨@whatthebodygraspsnot @thisdivorce @crossmydna @captainjowl @mishervellous @iansfreckles @celestialmickey

[boyswanna-be-her]

"The cup is approaching a concerning level of fullness, neither half full nor empty but definitely containing more vomit than any of us would choose."

[sometimes-love-is-enough]

#6

why is the six so big. what.

“You,” said Remus, with a voice like a strangled cat attempting to reconstruct its mangled vocal chords, “are beautiful. Who did your eyes? I want to eat their frontal lobe.”

Janus was instantly charmed, of course. “They’re a genetic defect. So I suppose you’ll have to dig up my parents for dinner.”

[therecordconnection]

I finally heard Sabrina Carpenter's Christmas version of "Nonsense" and I just adore how absolutely silly and unserious it is. Every joke is both clever and also the dumbest thing I've ever heard. It sounds like she rewrote the words using the method of "put monkeys with typewriters in a room and they'll produce Shakespeare", only in this case it was "put a bunch of silly immature idiots in a Discord group chat and they'll produce innuendos that will make you laugh as well as facepalm hard enough to land you into your grave at the same time."

Making a song like that work as well as it does is a testament to her charisma and charm. She has a comedian's sense of timing and delivery, but she balances that out by just having really fun songs that are well crafted. I think that's the biggest thing that's really made me fall for her this year. Her astronomical rise has been one of my favorite things about mainstream pop music this year.

What can you say? She leaves quite an impression (five feet to be exact)

[winter-spark]

SSR Family Event in a Nutshell

Itaru: Alright so my sister's getting married and I need to get her a good gift, ideas?

Izumi: You should invite her to the next Spring Play! I mean you'll be the lead.

Itaru: No way.

Sakuya: You really respect your sister, huh?

Itaru: Yea but don't tell her that.

Sakuya: (I think he should invite her to the play.)

Masumi: You sure you don't want to invite her to the play?

Itaru: Surprised you care, but yea no. Absolutely not inviting her.

Chikage: So your gift?

Itaru: Picked out I just need to pick it out & send it to...

Itaru: So she already has one coming. So I still need a great gift. I don't want to just give her money... Citron?

Citron: I can say with absolute confidence, you should invite her to the play. It'll mean a lot.

Itaru: ...Alright.

Itaru: Everyone I've decided to invite my sister to the play. And as special thanks to Citron for this, I want him to have a special role in it.