#i woulda lost my damn mind by now

[bloodpen-to-paper]

Me, who hasn’t watched Miraculous a day in my life, seeing Adrienette become canon after 5,420,069 years of the show teasing it:

[sereves]

Tsubaki and Lawless Sibling Headcanons

After reading that meme about what woulda happened if Lawless and Tsubaki were on good terms I had to make these headcanons

This. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought about this-  Allow me to do a small rant/analysis-

Lawless is canonically referred to as having a family root according to Gear in this panel

Yall no one can change my mind Lawless got fat daddy issues that run deeper than a black hole

As shown in these panels he has a deep respect and gratitude to Saint germaine for reviving him, and even goes as far as to lecture Kuro for being "rude"

I also find it interesting how of all the siblings Lawless is pretty much the only one that was happy to be revived, aside from Ildio who was more or so neutral on his new life. Lawless pretty much took his new life and appreciated his second chance-

Personally in my opinion, I believed because he was a lower-ranking prince who was killed in a conspiracy he may have never gotten a chance to live life? He looks like he died pretty young and since he was a lower ranking prince, he may have lived with a silver spoon in his mouth, but likely was never able to go out to much and was probably very lonely. He probably only had Guil by his side which is why I love and adore their father/brother dynamic 😭

SPEAKING OF BROTHER DYNAMICS- KURO I GOT A BONE TO PICK WITH YOU-

dAWG- WHYD KURO DO HIM SO DIRTY 😭Bro straight up just lost Ophelia, is about to lose his "second father", then gets dumped by his own god damn brother- Like Kuro pretty much told him "we shouldn't have been born". Like bruh lawless got done so dirty in a span of like a week, like even after this he goes back home  Ophelia's kingdom was destroyed 💀

Also he had to walk to the meeting stop for about 10 days+ and then walked back on his hedgehog stubby legs like is this man okay, IMAGINE WALKING ALL THE WAY ON FOOT AND JUST BEING DUMPED LIKE THAT- no wonder bro held such a fatass grudge against Kuro. Centuries later they meet again and  Kuro really had the audacity to be like, "why u mad at me" as if he didnt kill Saint and told Lawless they shouldn't really exist 😭

Anyways, moving onto the actual Tsubaki and Lawless siblings headcanons-

Lawless desperately wanted a family and tried seeking that through his new found Servamp siblings, but sadly none of them really wanted it aside from Ildio and Freya. Love the headcanon that Freya canonically thinks of Lawless as her "dear brother"🥺

Tsubaki later down the road looks like he craved that too? In fact it looks like he went to every sibling and tried asking them who he was and none of them knew. But what Im curious is about is this

Lawless already knew about Tsubaki? When we got Lily's POV, he stated that he was visited by Tsubaki, and Tsubaki started laughing because none of his siblings knew about him. Now Im curious, because if Lawless had met Tsubaki in the past, what was it like? Did he just know of Tsubaki from C3? Given the fact that Lawless has spied on them sometimes when he was bored, is that how he found it? But I have a weak heart, so lets make some headcanons on had they met earlier and actually became close.

In a perfect world, Id had pictured Lawless helped Tsubaki escape from C3 and they both became close since both craved familial love. Its been revealed that Tsubaki is trying to protect his little sister so for sure, bros in the same boat as Lawless trying to make found family

There was also an old book called, "The Hedgehog and the Fox" where a quote is stated, "The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing." Reference: https://www.jimcarrollsblog.com/blog/2018/5/23/are-you-a-hedgehog-or-a-fox#:~:text='The%20fox%20knows%20many%20things,various%20wiles%20of%20the%20fox.

I like to think this very similar to Lawless and Tsubaki. Tsubaki, is likely one of the strongest siblings and can clap cheeks instantly. He has many skills and is canonically the only one that can "kill" his siblings, but Lawless is older, so I believe the "the hedgehog knows one big thing" is really cute, but it feeds into the dynamic that, yes although Tsubaki is superior to Lawless in terms of power, he has a lot more to learn.

Considering Tsubaki was locked up in C3 for a while I would like to think Lawless took him out and immediately tried getting him situated in the modern era. Thats my perspective on "hedgehog knows one big thing" like imagine being locked up and experimented for ages, and finally being introduced the modern day, like when was the last time Tsubaki saw the sun 💀

I also headcanon Lawless is probably pretty well off considering hes greed and judging from the fact hes constantly wearing rings and bracelets like I doubt those are fake, and he literally shops at Shibuya. Lawless is canonically a bougie bitch 💀

Please give me cute shopping montage of Lawless dripping out Tsubaki in modern Japanese styled clothing LIKE I WANNA SEE HIM WEARING THIS

Anyways thats all I have for now, but TLDR: I love servamp sibling interactions, strike please stop depriving us

[moltengoldveins]

yeah no, I think the realization that I’m older than Anakin Skywalker in the second prequel is doing something to my brain. yall. Y’all, he was a child. He was nineteen. He wasn’t even in his twenties. Say what you will about the Jedi culture (I have… so many thoughts. Most are positive, with a few glaring negatives) it obviously did not work for him, and it was not supporting or caring for him the way he needed, and nobody got him out. There was no way out. No “hold out until you graduate, then get an apartment away from your family and find peace” no “leave that group of friends and find people who love you” he had Obi Wan, Palpatine, and Padme. Obi Wan made it quite clear that Jedi weren’t Allowed to love the way Anakin had been taught love was supposed to work, and he clearly didn’t explain how Jedi love worked. Not well enough for Anakin to internalize it around the screaming background noise of suspicion and slavery. Palpatine was a Sith. And Anakin married Padme. We’re literally never shown evidence that he made other close friends in the Jedi, or anywhere else. Obi Wan, traumatized oddball with a maverick master and a years-long gap in his padawan training that he was, had Quinlan, had Windu, had Yoda, had Bant, had Dex. He had People. Anakin did not. I’m kinda… kinda loosing my mind over that, cause I know how bad that can get. I’ve had people now for a few years. I didn’t, for nearly two decades. I am rather uniquely situated to be sympathetic. That doesn’t excuse how badly Anakin screwed up but damn if it doesn’t explain it. I am older than he was. I’m really still a kid. I’m in college. I’m learning how to balance a sleep schedule. I’m taking meds for the first time. I’m new to making friends. he’s married. He’s battlefield-knighted, thrust into a spotlight, and told-but-not-told that it’s His Responsibility to end this war. He’s holding dying men. He’s raising a thirteen year old girl who’s never been trained for a conflict bigger than a diplomatic dispute. He’s cradling his beaten and violated mother in his arms. She doesn’t have enough breath to finish telling him she loves him before she’s gone. I’m pretty sure I woulda snapped, too. I’m pretty sure I woulda snapped sooner. I dunno if my nigh-unhealthy adherence to my oddly specific moral code (no violence against children, ever, period) would have stopped me in the Temple, or at the Tusken camp, but I woulda done horrible things in his situation. I think we all would have, and it makes me uncomfortable when people say that Anakin is some kind of monster. I think we like pretending that there’s some inherent difference between Bad People and Good People that starts at birth. There isn’t. We’re all fallen. We’re all entirely capable and Actually Rather Prone to evil in all its forms, yes including that one. you are capable of that level of evil. The whole point of these stories is to show you how easy it is to ‘fall,’ how convenient it is to reach for the darkness, how quickly you could find yourself lost. You are capable, in certain circumstances, of committing atrocities. You are. We all are. We are lucky enough to be born with decent parents, with a supportive community, and a lack of significant influences to the ‘dark side.’ But there is no difference between you and i and a murderer in our levels of ‘inherent soul goodness’ or whatever, just a difference in our stubborn adherence to what is good and right. Our choices are our own, yea, but they are always human choices. There has never been a choice made by someone that could not have, in another circumstance, been made by anyone else.

[wildlcck]

THE ANGEL THAT IS SUNSHINE (@soughtserenity): Sadie did you ever want kids before everything happened or were you and your Jake happy with things just as they were ?

━━━🥀━━━

the shot glass from earlier lies empty, long abandoned now. she's started helping herself to some generous sips from the bottle instead- one. then, another. ❛ we thought about it. talked about it. we tried our fair share o' times. but... it wa'n't on the cards for us. ❜ lighting a cig with a small, faltering, faraway smile (one of the few she knows now). ❛ i know he woulda loved bein' a daddy, my jakey. he never did say all that much about it. he always said i was all the world he was ever gonna want or need. that our little world, this life of ours we was buildin' together... that was big enough, more than enough, for him. but, he thought about it. i know he did. i knew what he was thinkin', what was on his mind... without him sayin' nothin'. always did. ❜ she can remember fretting something fierce about it. 'cause they'd have this other mouth or mouths to feed and care for on their hands. and how would any kid of hers, with her having this cold stone for a heart, who'd come from a woman like her momma, who'd come from a momma like hers before her be any different? how could she or they be anything other than cold- hard? then, feeling some relief. a little sadness somewhere, too. for him. maybe some for herself. she did get to wondering. thinking if maybe she, if they, couldn't do it different. so, maybe she wasn't the mothering kind. but, in a warm, loving house, a home, with a man who's all love and heart? it could be different. they could do it different. so, she'd started thinking and they'd started talking about a stubborn-hearted, wild thing of a girl running 'round, one with unruly blonde hair. just like her. playing to her and teaching silly old nursery rhymes on the harmonica. or maybe a boy, with his kind eyes and heart. them reading to him and him always with his head stuck in some book. how different it'd be. she lost track of the tries, eventually. stopped counting, talking or wanting about it. got a little angry. a little sad maybe, too. she never did like having nothing taken from her, taken out of her hands. she always wanted to not want something. or to want to. then, she came across that little lopsided donkey-horse again, tucked away someplace, a little dusty now. the one he'd been trying to carve for what seemed like forever (she'd picked splinter after splinter out of his hands- he never was all that handy or practical, her jake). she was always saying how it looked more like an ass. he always laughed at that. but, he was determined, all right. he told her he was gonna make a whole ranch, even if it killed him (and his damn hands). how they'd learn their girl or boy all about theirs. how she could teach them to ride someday. one night, when they was doing the washing up, she wanted to tell him how she loved that stupid little horse. and him. about everything and all the nothing. then, a plate slipped from her hands. and then, she wanted nothing more than to break, to shatter them one after the other. so, she did, sobbing or screaming or something in between the two. he didn't say a word, her jake. just tended gently to her bloodied hands, all ridden with cuts. wiped carefully at the tears. held her in his warm, loving arms. he didn't say nothing when she replaced the plates a day or so later. just held her a little tighter at night, in the dark and quiet. ❛ he woulda made a great daddy, ma jake. the best. ❜

[leezanetheofficial]

sometimes moving on is hard. especially when the person did nothing wrong.

A male enters the room. Picking up a polaroid picture of him and his now ex-boyfriend he feels tears building up begging for release. Throwing it in the trash he sits at his desk and gets out his journal.

‘I'm anxious, kinda sad. Hard to be your best when you lost the best you had. Spending days just on my phone. Wondering where it all went wrong. I'm nervous, pretty wired. I said your name too much now my lungs got tired. Thinking maybe I'm to blame... I just need someone to hate…’ Writing down his thoughts brought little comfort to him. But he knew he needed to let it all out. Continuing his writing he didn't notice the tears that started running down his face. A single teardrop landing on the page.

It didn't take long before he had gathered all his thoughts and put them to a beat. Going inside his studio he took a deep breath and started recording. “Oh-oh-oh, you made this damn hard for me. You and your goddamn honesty. It got me thinking I wish you would've cheated and smashed my heart to pieces! I wish I had a reason I could hate your guts for leaving.” He started softly his voice getting louder near the end.

“I wish you were the villain. A psycho with no feelings. So how do I move on?” He held the last note getting higher in pitch pushing his voice. “When you did nothing wrong?” The words were spoken almost monotonously as though the person expressing them was attempting to convince themselves of the validity they bore.

Taking a momentary breath before the next line he readied himself for the high notes. “(Ah-ah-ah) Wish you did something wrong (ah-ah-ah) But you did nothing wrong. I know it's messed up, kinda bad. But I wish we didn't talk, and you just left like that. I'd be angry instead of numb. Dammit, who have I become?” His voice sounded smooth as his pitch got lower. The raw emotions coming from him revealed his true feelings. “Oh-oh-oh, you made this so damn hard for me. You and your goddamn honesty. It got me thinking, I wish you woulda cheated and smashed my heart to pieces! I wish I had a reason I could hate your guts for leaving! I wish you were the villain, a psycho with no feelings. So how do I move on… When you did nothing wrong?!” The emotions present were heartsickness, grief, suffering and anguish, discord, and disorder. He ran a hand through his hair as tears fell from his eyes. Hoping to pull himself together he took a brisk break before continuing. “(Ah-ah-ah) Wish you did something wrong (ah-ah-ah) But you did nothing wrong. In the middle of the night, I start to fantasize that you would ruin my whole life, oh. ‘Cause you're the best I had. And I keep running back like a goddamn fool, tryna change your mind!” “You were all mine, can't believe I… wish you would have cheated, and smashed my heart to pieces… I wish I had a reason I could hate your guts for leaving! I wish you were the villain a psycho with no feelings. So how do I move on! When you did nothing wrong…” He paused for a brief moment, letting it all sink in. The song being wrapped up he took his headphones off and closed the papers with the lyrics on them. He left the room. Leaving the title of the song and pages behind. “I wish you cheated” by (M/N)

[taegularities]

Btw I finally read Entertainer because I was free last night after a long time and when I read especially your works I like to take my time to take every word and every line in and oh my god it was great. I have so much to say about it but idk just what to say cause that fic got me thinking and uhh I'll probably say things that won't really make sense cause my thoughts are so jumbled up right now so please don't mind it.

I was so excited to read it that's why I read cmi palette first and I have to say that it lived up to it. I was avoiding and asks about it cause I didn't want to spoil it for myself and I generally love spoilers so it's a big thing that I was avoiding any. The warnings gave me an idea of what it could be so I was anticipating it. His craving for OC was just so pathetic to see. OC is such a badass and mysterious in the beginning. She and Cmi OC are my favs I have to say. I loved how she'd reject his advances and he'd be agitated.

“Consent is consent. He's grown up now.” (I'm sorry if that wasn't the line but it was something along those lines) and the “sexual harassment” in the warnings had me go ohh I'm damn sure now but nevertheless it was ever worse than that. You said not to fall for him and I made sure to remember it and thank goodness I didn't 😮‍💨 I love love love OC for this so much, I'm straight but she got me questioning my sexuality (not really but you know what I'm talking about) I swear if she was a man I woulda put a ring on it cause there's no way in hell I am letting that goddess go but then again MEN can NEVER match a woman's energy like that much less OC's.

Jungkook just wanted to fuck her and that was clear from the beginning, he was intrigued by her and his want to unfold her secrets was what made him want her even more. He just wanted a taste. His inner monologue about him being selfish but not bad was a giveaway of his egotistical personality and I'd say narcissistic too. His blindness to his mistake, his inability or him being incapable of accepting it and taking accountability just shows how terrible of a person he is. That mistake was a prank to him and he kept calling it one repeatedly which is just so disgusting.

I wouldn't say anything about the smut but only because of the whole story, after what he did to Jangmi I couldn't really bring myself to “enjoy” it but if we Only talk about the smut part separately without knowing the whole context I'd say that you slayed it just like every time.

I have to be honest I stopped listening to the playlist once I got to the “morning after” part. It was intense and the tension was there in the room like a huge entity engulfing each and every corner of the room and every being in that room, not that it wasn't there before but this time things were more intense.

I was holding my breath the whole time I was reading the rest of the fic. The way OC said “I'll stay till my feet tingle” was just 🤌 and before the performance everything was just chef's kiss. What OC did to him was definitely what he deserved. The way all his dreams of conquering the world through his music and his determination and hard work went in vain. He lost it all and that was satisfying to see. Jangmi was such a sweet and pure soul and my heart aches for her. She loved someone who did not know what it was, someone who didn't deserve to be loved and she suffered so much because of it. She didn't deserve it, not a single ounce of it but she suffered. I wonder how you can do such horrible things to someone without feeling like offing yourself and I don't think I wanna know how it feels. It's heartbreaking how she lost her life and how she wasn't happy in her last days. I hope she's in a better place now.

Oh yeah and the hints were everywhere. In subtle lines and actions. Not obvious, you just had to pay attention to certain lines more than the others to catch onto it and I loved how my mind was working to process those things and trying to come up with what they could possibly mean.

This fic is a masterpiece, Rid. And you say that you were just experimenting? God knows how much I love this fic. I love all your works and this one wasn't any different. And I think I've said this before as well that I'd read your works if you published them in the form of a book and this one is definitely one that would be a great one. You should definitely write more such fics. Reading this right after cmi was...well so different cause the Jungkook we see in cmi and the Jungkook in Entertainer are polar opposites. I have no words to describe how much I want to kiss your hands rn. You know what? I think I'm rambling now and you'll probably find me praising Entertainer again some time later cause I think I might have more to sya about it 😅Thank you so much for writing this and putting it out for us to read as well. I'm sorry it's kinda long. Love you and your works 💕💕

'that fic got me thinking' YAAAS that's the best thing ever, when something makes you think 😭 there is indeed so much to think about when it comes to entertainer and i loved all of your thoughts so much. (sorry for responding so late, though, but as you said, i like taking my time with such thoughtful reviews too 🥺)

the fact that you were avoiding spoilers is crazy :') and right, he was so pathetic, wasn't he?? like, you can be sweet about wanting someone or you can be ridiculous and not take a hint and keep trying just by you're horny :| cmi and entertainer oc as favourites??? okay if people love these two, i can die in peace lmao

yeah, the consent is consent and growing up line was a biiiig hint (and you're so right, they were everywhere, albeit subtly at times). like, he used to not know it, and honestly, he still doesn't quite understand it, bc the things he did with oc aren't really… desired. i'm glad you didn't fall for him haha he def doesn't deserve it. oc though… 🤣 i understand crushing on her lmao i lowkey do, too. yup yup, him calling it a prank and justifying things really indicates quite clearly what kind of a person he is. and honestly, no good person would think about themselves that 'they're not a bad person, just a little selfish' like 💀 dude.

it's so nice to know that you listened to the playlist at all! i always wonder if people do haha. yet, i also get pausing it, because after that whole chaos, you'd need all your focus for the last scene. so so glad you liked everything about it. it was intense to write but i was also very nervous, bc i couldn't fully say what y'all would think about it. in the end, yes, he deserved losing everything and jangmi deserved better.

it was an experiment for sure yes, and i'm happy i succeeded with it 😭 omg entertainer as a novel, freaking imagineeee!! thank you for saying this. it's hard jumping out of the comfort zone, but i enjoy it, so might come back with another experiment at some point <3 will take all kisses :P and ALSO YEEES, come back anytime haha i'd love to hear your thoughts bc they're so insightful!! thank you so much, love, i'm so freaking appreciative of you and so beyond grateful that you're here. love you sm <3

[loonmartell]

Omg the finale is here ‼️

You NAILED it, v!! I’m so proud of you 🥺 it’s such a delicate and complicated plot and yet you wrote it so beautifully 🤍🤍

This was so so incredible and such an amazing story, i cried i laughed i everything-ed and i’m gonna miss my babies so much 🥲🤍

Messy running commentary incoming, watch out!

“I remember everything, Joel.”

Not Mr. Miller. Joel. 

NOBODY TALK TO ME I NEED TIME TO PROCESS THIS

—

In one fluid motion, Joel sent his chair flying backward as he dropped to his knees before you.

KISS HER POOKIE BEAR KISS HER GOOD

—

The first kiss was delicate— cautionary. He wavered between losing control and reluctance, the path of his lips moving fluidly like they had always known their place against yours. It was so much different than the first kiss months ago, where then it had been about discovery and excitement, each draw of your bodies together new and profound. But now, it was a kiss to rekindle a flame that had dwindled out, a resurgence of emotions neither of you had experienced in years. Yes, those few months together had been exhilarating, but you had barely scratched the surface of where the bounds of your love lay.

If this isn’t art i don’t know what is 🤌🏻

—

“Don’t think I forgot at all, baby. Just wanted to savor you a minute,” Joel grinned. “I love you. God, I love you so fuckin’ much. Ain’t ever gonna stop tellin’ you how much I love you.”

The way I’m grinning like a fool 🥹 IM SO HAPPY YALL DONT UNDERSTAND THESE ARE MY BABIES

—

“I got all the time in the world, baby. Gonna spend every damn day provin’ myself to you. I’m already on my knees for you. Anythin’ you ask of me, I’ll give it to you.”

I need to die like right this second, he’s so in love with her 🥺♥️

—

He trailed his fingers up your bare legs, his hands teasing their way higher. A shiver ran over your skin as he pushed the hem of the dress further up, his head bending down to kiss a path over your knee and up your thigh. 

“God, I missed you so damn much, baby,” Joel groaned, his tongue gliding over your pebbled skin.

This might be one of the hottest things I’ve ever read

—

Joel lay his head in your lap, his puppy dog eyes staring up at you with a glimmer of desire.

Scratch that, THIS is the hottest thing I’ve ever read

—

Joel tugged your ass down to the edge of the chair, flicking the hem of your dress into your lap. You tried working your fingers over the band of your underwear, but Joel beat you to it with a swiftness that left you dizzy. Well, dizzier than you already were. 

Joel hoisted your calves over his shoulders, settling himself between your thighs. Flashes of memories in this exact position came flooding in; this was familiar. Familiarity beyond compare and something you desperately yearned for. 

Nvm this is all so hot

—

Joel gave the softest nod as if to say I know, driving you closer to the edge

Literally fanning myself

—

“I need to hear y’say it, baby,” he begged. “Please tell me you’re mine.”

THE POSSESSIVENESS IS BACK IN FULL FORCE HELL YES

—

Joel locked an arm around your back and lifted you from the table, spinning you both until your back hit the wall across from the table. The impact was enough to knock the air from your lungs and dizzy your mind,

JOEL SHE JUST HAD A CONCUSSION FFS YOU GORGEOUS HORNY MAN

—

Joel looked up at you through blurry eyes, his thick lashes coated in fresh tears. 

This is it, this is the end of loon im so done

—

“If I had known y’needed a good hit to the head to get all these memories back, I woulda tripped you myself,” Joel teased.

BAHAHA JOEL PLS 😭

—

“It’s not fair,” you cried. “It’s not fair that she gets to be angry when she wasn’t the one that lost everything.”

Oh my sweet baby i need to hug her so bad 🥺🥺

—

Joel spoke your name softly, the syllables more beautiful than ever when they rolled through his accent. You hummed in response, gazing up at him through tired eyes.

“I woulda waited an eternity for you, baby,” he confessed. “I woulda gone to my grave waitin’ to have you back in my arms like this again.”

If you see something in the sky, it’s me free falling cuz i can’t do this anymore

—

“Give me your pain. Give me all your anger and everything inside you, and I swear I’ll keep you safe. Y’ain’t ever gonna be alone again. Not while I’m still breathin’, baby. It’s you and me. Forever.”

V, you’re killing me and i couldn’t be happier

—

Sarah threw her arms around your neck, muffling her sobs into your hospital gown as you squeezed your arms tighter around her body. You missed so many milestones and moments of her life because of the accident, so many memories that were never made. Every family meal, every soccer game…you lost them all. 

OH SARAH MY BABYYY 😭😭

—

Welcome home, baby. 

I love you.

SOBBING I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭

—

I’m definitely gonna reread this cuz ohh my god 🥹♥️

Thank you so much for writing & sharing this beautiful masterpiece!!!

To summarize how i was the whole time reading:

Killing Me Softly | (Joel x teacher!f!reader)

Chap. 10 Home

Summary: How bittersweet it is to come home. Rating: 18+ Explicit Word Count: 8.6k Warnings: NONE!!!! Find out for yourselves xoxo A/N: If you made it this far, thank you. This obviously isn't the absolute END, there will be an epilogue to come... but I still want to thank each and every one of you. This series has such a special place inside my heart, and I will be forever grateful for the love and support you all have given. All the kisses and hugs and love to you all. (I also realize there are going to be a few questions left unanswered, but I promise it'll be resolved in the epilogue) * And once again, I'm the most thankful to @loonmartell for helping me create the most beautiful story. Sending you all my love, sweet pea <3 *

Masterlist | Ko-Fi

You most definitely had a concussion—which was not ideal when you were behind the wheel of a moving vehicle. Not only were you trying to subdue the memories still filtering through your mind, but you were also trying to navigate the roads with blurred vision. Streetlights that had once been unfamiliar slowly morphed into a memorized path, leading you right back to the place you once called home. Sarah had guided you home just months ago after a soccer game, but this was different. This was a reawakening, a thousand tiny moments rising from their endless slumber. Each turn of the wheel and stopsign guided you back to the one person your heart cried out for… Joel. 

If only your brain and heart could get on the same page. While your heart ached for Joel in ways you hadn’t felt in months, your mind still clung to the anger you associated with him over the last several months. You couldn’t just stop loving him, but you didn’t know how to stop hating him at the same time. 

The final turn into his neighborhood was coming up fast, yet your speed came to a crawl. It hadn’t even occurred to you that he could have moved on. Half a year was enough time for Joel to move on, to find another woman, to be happy without you. You experienced the exact opposite: you couldn’t move on, didn’t find another man, and were far from happy. Seeing him again was probably a mistake, but how would you move on now that you knew everything?

The nausea was back in full force as you pulled up to Joel’s home, his truck parked crooked in the driveway. This was your home once upon a time. Yeah, you were going to be sick again. Wrenching the door open, you leaned out of your car and dry-heaved. Nothing came up, which you were thankful for. You needed a strong stomach and a clear mind for whatever would come. The ground beneath your feet became distorted as you walked the path up his front yard. You took a moment to shake away the double-vision, your mind clouding around the edges. It was not the time to lose your grip on reality. 

The worn wood of Joel’s front door taunted you, your hand hovering over the center as you debated knocking. All it would take is a quick rap of your knuckles, and you’d see him again. Before you could sabotage yourself, your knuckles tapped against the door. 

“Comin’!�� 

The sound of Joel’s voice in the distance electrified your nerves. He was right there. Any moment, he’d open the door and—.

The door cracked open, and you stared up into the familiar brown eyes that plagued every memory overlapping inside your mind. Joel stood motionless, his eyebrows slightly raised and lips parted. He looked at you as if you were a ghost. You gave him the most pathetic smile, unsure of what to do with your hands or body. 

“Can I come in?” You blurted out. 

“Of course,” he said softly, opening the door wider. 

A simple step over the threshold, and you were home. 

You took a moment to let it all settle in: nothing had changed. The varnish was worn in certain places on the floor, the same as it had been when you lived here. Joel walked the same path daily: through the front door and to the right, directly into the kitchen. Sarah’s soccer bag hung on the staircase railing, a pair of her shoes strewn across the second step. 

“Is Sarah home?” You asked, your eyes still wandering around the downstairs of the house.

“No, she’s stayin’ with a friend this weekend,” he replied.

Joel shifted his weight, tearing your focus away from the house and back onto him. There was a look of confusion furrowing his brows together, and you realized you hadn’t entirely explained yourself to him yet.

“Listen, I know I’m here unannounced,” you started. “I, uh, I haven’t touched the book since you gave it back. Well, I didn’t until today. I found it again, and this slipped out.”

Digging through your purse, you pinched the Polaroid between your fingers and pulled it free. Joel hesitantly reached for it, his fingers avoiding touching yours as he held it between his hands. A small smile formed on his lips as he ran his thumb over the photo's edges. 

“This was from a campin’ trip we went on with Sarah,” he sighed. “Sarah had just taken a tumble in some mud, and I remember I couldn’t stop laughin’, and you were quick with a camera and snapped this photo.”

“I know.”

“I got a photo of you, too. I still got it hangin’ up somewhere—.”

Joel’s voice trailed off, his eyes drifting up to yours. He had been so wrapped up in reminiscing that he didn’t listen to what you said. 

“Do you still have the one of Sarah, too?” 

Joel’s eyes grew wide, swaying in place. 

“You remember?” He faltered.

“I remember everything, Joel.”

Not Mr. Miller. Joel. 

Joel opened and closed his mouth at least three times before finally just shaking his head. He took a step back, letting the picture fall to the ground. You glanced down at the Polaroid lying between your feet, the photo of Joel doubling in your vision. Your body moved on its own accord, your balance teetering as you stumbled a bit to the side. Joel quickly caught your weight, his hands firm around your arm. 

“Woah,” he exhaled. “Y’okay?”

“I might have a concussion,” you laughed absently. “Took a bit of a fall earlier and hit my head.”

Joel cursed under his breath and slipped an arm around your waist, guiding you toward the dining room. Sunlight bled through the window shades on the wall, and you squinted your eyes to avoid intensifying your headache. The kitchen was just as you had remembered: cluttered and homey. Piles of dishes were laid in a drying rack by the sink, the dark countertops void of dirt aside from a few crumbs from toast or a residual ring of condensation from a beer bottle.

Joel helped you into one of the dining room chairs, moving swiftly to get you a glass of water. You weren’t sure if he meant to do it, but he had sat you in your chair at the table, the one you had always chosen during any family meal with him and Sarah. You smoothed your hands over the table, digging your nails into the groves of the woodwork.

“Here,” Joel said, extending a glass to you. 

You muttered a soft thank you, taking a drink as he took a seat beside you—his seat. The silence between you both was louder than the ringing in your ears, and you couldn’t stand it any longer. 

“Say something,” you pleaded.

Joel leaned forward, resting his elbows on his thighs as he peered up at you through glassy eyes. You knew that look: the exhaustion, the sadness. You had worn it well the last several months, and clearly, so did Joel. The person you were six months ago would have loved seeing Joel look so disheveled, but not now. Not when the past was hanging in the balance, finally uncovered and real. 

“Does Bennett know you’re here?” Joel asked, his eyes rising to yours. 

“What?” You gaped. Out of all the things Joel could have said, he chose that?

“Tommy saw y’all together,” he huffed. 

You wracked your brain, remembering when Tommy could have seen you and Bennett together. The only time you had seen Bennett was after the…. Oh. 

“He asked to meet me after everything happened,” you explained. “He wanted to share his side of things. You left out a lot, Joel. There was so much you didn’t tell me, and I had to rely on Bennett to piece the rest back together.”

“Are you datin’ him again? ‘Cause if you are, just tell me, and I’ll—I’ll find a way to move on and let you be happy. I ain’t gonna get in the way of your happiness, even if that means it’s with him.”

There was no way to ignore the bitterness in his words, yet you stifled a laugh. 

“After everything that’s happened, you actually think I'd go back to him?” You questioned. 

“Christ, I don’t know,” Joel sighed, running a hand over the back of his neck. 

“Bennett’s married,” you stated. “You must not have seen his wedding band when you were beating the shit out of him.”

Joel was harrowingly silent, his eyes trained on the work boots covering his feet. All you ached for was some sort of reaction—some kind of response—and he gave nothing. Your expectations had been set so high for this moment, yet nothing was going as you hoped. 

“I need to ask you something, and I need you to be honest,” you said.

“Of course.” 

“Why didn’t you fight for me?” You whispered. “When everyone was making decisions for me, why didn’t you step in and fight back?”

“I tried,” he lamented. “Your family decided on everythin’, and I couldn’t step in.”

“Yes, you could have,” you pressed. 

You brushed your hand over the stumble on his jaw, lifting his face to meet yours. You saw it deep within the dark brown of his eyes: regret. 

“That’s not a good enough answer, Joel. No one fought for me,” you pressed. “I was alone in everything, and you should have been the one person standing up to them against everything they were choosing to do. You let Bennett come back into my life when you knew he had been horrible to me in the past. Why were you so willing to just let me go?”

Joel grabbed your free hand and brought it to his lips, pressing soft kisses into the center of your palm. It wasn’t till the first tear hit your fingers that you realized he was crying. Joel looked defeated, his face framed between one hand and your other pressed against his lips. Truly and utterly defeated. 

“I never wanted to let you go. Sayin’ that last goodbye to you while you were in the hospital was the hardest damn thing I’ve ever had to do, and I ain’t got no excuses for the choices I made. If I could go back and change everythin’, I would. I swear I would in a heartbeat. Losin’ you was the worst thing that’s ever happened to me, and I know I coulda done more. You deserved more. You deserved better, and I shoulda been the one there for you. Not Bennett. I know I ruined everything. Fuck, I—I really fucked it all up.”

“I hate you for what you did,” you said, lifting your hand to brush away his tears. “I hate you so much for hurting me.”

Joel only nodded, more tears streaming down his cheeks as he closed his eyes. You ran your thumb over his cheekbone, tracing the line of his beard as it dipped down to his jaw. Joel released a shaky breath, leaning into your touch. 

“There ain’t enough words to describe how sorry I am,” he mumbled into your hand. “I’m so fuckin’ sorry for hurtin’you, and I’ve been livin’ with that guilt for years. I just wanted you to be happy. Even if it wasn’t with me.”

“I was happy, Joel. With you. I loved you so much. So many memories are still unraveling in my head, but in each of them, I know I loved you.”

“I’m so sorry,” he cried softly. 

“I hate you, Joel. I hate you, but I can’t ignore the fact that I still love you. I love the life we built together and the memories we made with Sarah. I miss this house, and I miss this kitchen where we’d make breakfast together. I miss waking up beside you every day. I miss staying up late with you and annoying you about the books I was reading.” You took a deep breath, trying to slow yourself down. “I miss you, Joel. I don’t know how long it will take me to forgive you, but I—I really miss you.”

A choked sob escaped from Joel’s mouth, and he leaned his head back, your hands falling into your lap. You didn’t know what to do with yourself other than try not to throw up—because your body was still trying to desperately fight off the nausea rolling inside your stomach. Confessing feelings while also battling a minor concussion had not been your brightest idea, but you had braved through worse before. 

So many moments of silence passed before Joel finally glanced back at you, his lips twitching as he held back another round of tears. 

“Y’have no fuckin’ idea how much I miss you,” he confessed. “I’ve waited so long for the moment you’d remember everythin’. I tried to imagine what I’d do when y’got those memories back, and… fuck. I’m so sorry for everythin’ I did.”

You took his hands in yours, interlocking your fingers around his. It was your turn to start crying, and you felt the tears fall against your fingers.

“What did you do?” You asked. “When you imagined me getting my memories back, what did you do?”

“I imagined kissin’ you and tellin’ you how much I loved you,” he said.

“What’s taking you so long?”

In one fluid motion, Joel sent his chair flying backward as he dropped to his knees before you. Reaching up, he cupped your face between his large hands, his mouth hovering over yours. You weren’t sure what he was waiting for, but you gave him a simple nod, and that was enough. 

The first kiss was delicate— cautionary. He wavered between losing control and reluctance, the path of his lips moving fluidly like they had always known their place against yours. It was so much different than the first kiss months ago, where then it had been about discovery and excitement, each draw of your bodies together new and profound. But now, it was a kiss to rekindle a flame that had dwindled out, a resurgence of emotions neither of you had experienced in years. Yes, those few months together had been exhilarating, but you had barely scratched the surface of where the bounds of your love lay.

You were the first to cave into the chaos, deepening the kiss until Joel’s movements determined your breathing. When his head moved, so did yours. When his tongue overlapped yours, you repeated the motion. Over and over until you lost the ability to identify where you started and he ended. 

“Joel,” you panted, his lips still crushed against yours.

“Hmm?”

He was too enamored with you to respond coherently. You raked your nails over his scalp, refamiliarizing yourself with the softness of his curls. Joel groaned into your open mouth, his tongue dancing with yours once more.

“Joel,” you muttered again. 

“Yeah, baby?” He exhaled, finally breaking away from your swollen lips. 

You pressed your forehead against his, your eyelashes fluttering up at him. Joel looked down at you with blown pupils, the brown color in his eyes nearly black as he waited for your response.

“I think you forgot to say something,” you whispered, laughing softly. 

“Don’t think I forgot at all, baby. Just wanted to savor you a minute,” Joel grinned. “I love you. God, I love you so fuckin’ much. Ain’t ever gonna stop tellin’ you how much I love you.”

“I still don’t forgive you for everything,” you reminded him. “It’ll take me some time to heal from all of this fully.”

Joel brushed his nose against yours, his lips tugging upward.

“I got all the time in the world, baby. Gonna spend every damn day provin’ myself to you. I’m already on my knees for you. Anythin’ you ask of me, I’ll give it to you.”

Breathless. You were breathless. This was the man you should have spent your life with, the man you should have married. Joel saw his faults, admitted them, and submitted himself to you out of love and dedication. Anger was still to be had, but it could wait. 

“Anything?” You echoed.

He trailed his fingers up your bare legs, his hands teasing their way higher. You mindlessly decided on a dress earlier and thanked yourself for it. A shiver ran over your skin as he pushed the hem of the dress further up, his head bending down to kiss a path over your knee and up your thigh. 

“God, I missed you so damn much, baby,” Joel groaned, his tongue gliding over your pebbled skin.

“Show me how much you missed me.”

Joel lay his head in your lap, his puppy dog eyes staring up at you with a glimmer of desire. You knew that look; you had seen it so many times before in his eyes. Too many memories had taken their place in your mind to ever let you forget the way Joel looked at you when he wanted you. 

“Can I?” He asked, brushing his hand between your thighs.

Your body responded easily to his touch, a familiarity you once knew. The friction of your underwear against your clit was growing uncomfortable as it throbbed at the vibration of his voice. Like a moth to a flame, you were drawn to Joel in more ways than one. You craved to be touched, to be pulled apart and put back together in the ways only he knew. 

Joel tugged your ass down to the edge of the chair, flicking the hem of your dress into your lap. You tried working your fingers over the band of your underwear, but Joel beat you to it with a swiftness that left you dizzy. Well, dizzier than you already were. 

Joel hoisted your calves over his shoulders, settling himself between your thighs. Flashes of memories in this exact position came flooding in; this was familiar. Familiarity beyond compare and something you desperately yearned for. 

“Please,” you whined.

He wasted no time giving in to your plea. Joel licked a thick stripe up your slick entrance, rewarding himself with a soft moan leaving your lips. You unknowingly lied months ago when you said no one had tasted you like this… Joel had. He thrived on giving you pleasure like this, doing this countless times before. He knew your body better than anyone else, and your body cried out for him in ways you could not control. 

He devoured you like he sought to destroy the years of distance that had passed between you. Every flick of his tongue against the apex of your sex, every gravelly moan from his throat—it all revolved around that undeniable truth that you both were meant to be together. That’s how it should have always been. 

“More,” you begged.

Words failed you, yet Joel knew what you needed. His tongue plunged inside of you, curling ever so slightly. The pleasure inside you burned slowly, igniting a warmth through your veins. You throbbed against his mouth, his breath hot on your skin as he latched onto your clit. You arched against him, your hand snaking down to latch onto the hair on his scalp. Joel let out a prideful moan, working his tongue faster against your aching bud. 

“There… right there…” You whimpered.

Joel gave the softest nod as if to say I know, driving you closer to the edge. A hitch of your breath, another flick of his tongue, repeated motions back and forth until your orgasm was crashing against the surface. You cried out, tears springing from your eyes as you succumbed to the climax wracking through your limbs. Joel pulled away, his mouth and mustache glistening from your release. 

Lowering your legs off his shoulders, Joel wordlessly hooked an arm around your waist and hauled you onto the dining table, the wood creaking under the weight. You pawed at his shirt, and Joel obliged your silent request as he yanked it over his head. You lifted yourself on your forearms, drinking in the sight of his bare chest. You glanced up at Joel to catch him smirking, amused by your silence.

“Y’can’t be lookin’ at me like that, baby,” Joel groaned, stepping between your open legs. “Not when I got you spread out and ready for me.”

“I can look at you however I want,” you smiled. 

Joel leaned down to meet your lips, dragging you in for a long kiss. 

“I missed you so fuckin’ much,” he chuckled.

His lips worked their way down your neck, sucking marks into your skin, while his hands worked quickly at the belt around his waist. Hooking one leg around his waist, you drew him closer, your breath hitching as he lined himself up with your entrance. 

Joel drove himself deep inside you in one thrust, the tip of his cock spearing into you. You gasped as his cock filled you with its entirety, your body stretched passed comfortability. You forgot how much you loved feeling him everywhere. With his cock fully seated inside you, Joel leaned forward and pressed his forehead against yours.

“I need to hear y’say it, baby,” he begged. “Please tell me you’re mine.”

“I’m yours, Joel,” you exhaled. “I love you.”

That’s all he needed to hear—a simple admission, a coupling of words that rewrote the story lost between the both of you. You spent months trying to deny your love for him, but there was no way to deny this connection. There was always an invisible string connecting you both, and though the string had frayed and unraveled, this moment snapped it back into place. 

“I love you,” Joel said. “Ain’t ever lettin’ you go.”

He pulled out slowly, only to snap his hips forward and render you speechless. You reached up to hold him against you, your nails digging crescent-shaped marks into his shoulder blades. Thrust after thrust, Joel drilled into you forcefully—brutally. You cried out every time his body slapped against yours, and your vision started to blur around the edges. Your core clenched around him, your thighs slick from your arousal that dripped between your bodies. 

“Takin’ my cock so well, baby,” Joel praised. “Doin’ so good for me.”

“Yes… yes…” You chanted the word between every thrust that he assaulted you with, every caress of his fingers around your waist, another revelation of how perfect you were together. 

“My perfect—fuck—perfect girl,” he gritted out.

Joel locked an arm around your back and lifted you from the table, spinning you both until your back hit the wall across from the table. The impact was enough to knock the air from your lungs and dizzy your mind, but he gave you no opportunity to recover before he was driving upwards into you, the new angle sending sparks of pleasure through your muscles. With one arm braced around your body and a hand pressed against the wall beside your head, Joel ground into you deeper…slower… your body begging for release. He could sense it, too, the way your thighs tightened around his waist and your cheeks dampened with tears.

“Yeah, I can feel it, baby,” Joel crooned. “I know you’re close. Gonna cum for me? Gonna give me what I want?”

“Please,” you cried, nodding vigorously.

Joel crushed his lips against yours, and you sobbed into his open mouth. Your body sized around him as your orgasm tore through you, stronger than the first. His thrusts stalled as your core pulsed through the aftershocks, the room spinning quicker every time another wave of release rocked through your stomach.

“That’s it, baby. That’s my good girl. Give me everythin’. I got you. Keep goin’.”

It was disastrous how obedient your body was to his commands. You entangled yourself in him, your tongue rolling over his tongue to silence his muffled words. Joel wasn’t far behind you, and soon enough, he punched out your name through clenched teeth, spilling himself into you. 

You rested your head back against the wall, his body sagging into yours as you both fought for air. The slow drip of his cum down your inner thigh and the sweat clinging to your brow was the only sensation you could feel as time passed in comfortable silence. 

“I love you, baby,” Joel groaned, his head falling onto your shoulder.

You carded a hand through his hair, leaning your cheek against his sweat-dampened curls. Right there, in Joel’s arms, everything made sense. The anger inside you could dissolve away—at least for a little while—and you could remind yourself that this was what love felt like. To be held. To be seen. To be cherished. 

Faint sounds of sniffling traveled past the rush of blood pumping in your ears, and you tugged at his curls to pull his head off your shoulder. Joel looked up at you through blurry eyes, his thick lashes coated in fresh tears. 

“It’s okay,” you hushed. 

“It’s not, though,” he argued. “I shoulda came back sooner. I shouldn’t have waited. There’s so much time we can’t get back, baby. S’all my fault.”

“We’ve got time,” you said softly. “I don’t want to be anywhere but here with you, Joel.”

“Promise?” He asked. 

“I promise.”

The evening grew late, and both you and Joel had settled into bed. It surprised you when you cried at seeing his room again, realizing nothing about it had changed. The fan was still humming softly in the corner as it always had, the soft breeze floating over the bedsheets as you climbed under the covers. Miscellaneous items were scattered on his dresser, and worn clothes littered the floor beside his hamper. Joel mumbled a slew of apologies at the sight of the mess, but it only made you cry harder. You didn’t care if it was messy. You only cared that you were finally home. Even without the memories resurfacing, your house never felt this way. It had never been a home because Joel wasn’t there to make it a home.

“How’re y’feelin’, baby?” Joel asked, his hand drawing circles into your back as you leaned against his naked body. 

“Like I could spend the rest of the night throwing up,” you said, half-jokingly. 

Your headache was splintering into a full-blown migraine, and your body had yet to recover from the fall earlier in the day. You had no regrets about being fucked against the wall, but it definitely proved to have done some damage to your fragile state.

“If I had known y’needed a good hit to the head to get all these memories back, I woulda tripped you myself,” Joel teased.

You attempted to laugh, only to have the nausea rising in your throat silence your efforts. 

“Don’t make me laugh right now,” you groaned, curling yourself tighter around his body.

“S’only kiddin’, baby. I’m just way too damn happy to have you in my arms again. I spent the last few months tryna figure out how I’d go on livin’ without you.”

“It wasn’t easy for me either,” you sighed. “I hardly recognize myself most days.”

“I won’t lie, seein’ you at parent-teacher conferences nearly broke me,” Joel admitted. 

“It broke me, too.”

Silence slipped over you, and the fan turned into the only noise inside the bedroom. Joel’s chest rose and fell softly under your head, his heart pounding echoing through your ear as you pressed yourself further into his embrace. 

“I’m sorry,” he finally spoke. “I wish I had a better word to describe how sorry I am. It wasn’t right of me to lie to you, and I shouldn’t have ever let your family make that decision.”

“I haven’t talked to them in months,” you muttered. “I don’t know how to forgive them for what they did.”

“Y’don’t need to forgive them until you’re ready. I just hope y’know they love you, baby.”

“I do know they love me, and that’s why it’s so hard. How can they love me yet still hurt me so much?”

Joel pressed a soft kiss against the crown of your head, his fingers squeezing around your shoulder.

“I don’t want to be angry anymore,” you said, your voice cracking. “But I don’t know how to feel anything but anger towards them. Especially toward Beth. The things she’s said to me in the past…How do I forgive her?”

“I ain’t gonna take sides,” he cautioned. “But I think the accident affected her the hardest. She was so angry at your family's plan, and I think she took out a lot of that anger on you when y’didn’t deserve it.”

“It’s not fair,” you cried. “It’s not fair that she gets to be angry when she wasn’t the one that lost everything.”

“You were her everythin’, baby,” Joel whispered. “She lost you.”

“You’re taking her side,” you grumbled.

“I’m just tryna show you the other side of things,” Joel offered. 

“I know you are.”

Joel sunk further into the pillows, dragging you down beside him. You nestled into his arms, your limbs twisting around him like they had a hundred times before. It’s odd what your body remembers, but your brain forgets; it is a simple gesture of an embrace that can never be entirely forgotten. You understood why things always felt so right when you met him again last year; your soul knew he was the missing piece that had been lost. 

Joel spoke your name softly, the syllables more beautiful than ever when they rolled through his accent. You hummed in response, gazing up at him through tired eyes.

“I woulda waited an eternity for you, baby,” he confessed. “I woulda gone to my grave waitin’ to have you back in my arms like this again.”

You blinked away the tears welling in your eyes, failing miserably to hide the quiver of your lips. Joel didn’t wait for your response, nor could you verbalize anything to match the poetry of his words. You only nodded and said, " I love you, " before your eyes drifted shut. Home. You were home.

Joel was softly snoring when you woke up. In the quiet light of the morning, you took the time to admire every softened feature of his face. The worried creases between his brows had smoothed overnight, yet you still found yourself brushing a finger over the spot they usually were. Brushing your hand down his face, you traced the outline of his lips, slightly parted and pouty, the soft kiss more kissable now than ever. Kissing him could wait; you wanted to savor this moment. 

You drew a path down his neck and chest, the spattering of hair across his torso tickling your fingertips. Joel stirred above you, his head rolling to the other side of the pillow. His eyes never opened, though, and you took the opportunity to crawl under the sheets. 

Joel’s cock lay heavy against his lower abdomen, precum leaking onto the soft skin of his stomach. You ran your hands over his hips, settling yourself lower until you were comfortable between his legs. His cock twitched as you wrapped a hand around his length, stroking him slowly and deliberately. Leaning your head down, you kissed up the shaft of his cock, dragging your tongue up the length and around the head. Joel’s body tensed up, yet he still didn’t wake. You took him into your mouth, the salty taste and musky scent overwhelming your senses. You hadn’t pleasured him like this in so long, and you had forgotten how much you loved it. 

Taking him deeper, you flattened your tongue, teasing the base of his cock with the tip of your tongue. You faintly heard a moan slip from Joel’s mouth, his cock twitching against your tongue. 

“Baby?” He groaned.

You hummed softly, pulling him from your mouth. With your saliva coating the entirety of his cock, you pumped him quicker, feeling his body seize up under your touch. 

“Fuck,” he grunted, bucking his hips upward. 

You rewarded him with another swirl of your tongue over the head of his cock, your mouth and hand working in tandem. He was close; you could feel it. 

“Just like that, baby. Forgot—fuck—forgot how good your mouth feels.”

You took him deeper, the tip of his cock tapping against the back of your throat. You sputtered around him, drool rolling down the corners of your mouth, yet you didn’t stop. Hollowing your cheeks, you heard Joel choke out a gasp. The warmth of his release flooded your mouth, coating the back of your throat and tongue. You drank down every drop, pulling off of him with a soft pop.

“Jesus Christ,” he sighed, slumping into the pillows. “Get your ass up here, baby.”

You crawled over his body, your legs straddling his waist. Joel grinned up at you, his tired eyes still barely open as he drank in your naked body. 

“C’mere,” he yawned, reaching up to grab the back of your neck.

His soft lips met yours, and you molded your body to him, letting him guide your mouth however he pleased. There was still a pang of anger tucked into the darkest corner of your heart, but you knew with time, it might fade away, and all you wanted was to bask in Joel’s love as long as possible. Things would take time, but you were willing to work on it. 

“I missed wakin’ up to you,” Joel muttered, his lips working down your jaw.

You could feel him growing hard against your core as you ground your hips down on him. It was impossible to hide the fact you were slick with arousal between your thighs, your body terribly responsive to every touch he placed on your body.

“You’re drenchin’ me, baby,” he groaned. “Need to feel your pussy now.”

“I’m all yours.”

“Damn fuckin’ right you are.”

You lifted your hips, notching his cock at your entrance. Inch by inch, you sunk onto him, both of you exhaling a shaky moan as he stretched you open. Leaning forward, you laced your fingers through Joel’s, holding him firm in your grasp. All you ached for was the tenderness he could provide, the slow synchronicity that flowed through his body and into yours. 

A gentle rub of his thumb over the back of your hand, the slow rise and fall of your hips against his cock… it was the lazy movements that spoke louder than words. It was the recognition that you were his just as he was yours. Soft moans fell off your lips as Joel guided you against his cock, little reassuring grunts leaving his mouth with each roll of your body.

“S’fuckin’ beautiful, baby,” Joel exhaled.

The sun seeping through the blinds lit the amber flecks around his pupils, the morning light painting his naked body golden. The veins beneath his thick neck strained as he lifted his head to watch you, his lips parted in awe as you sucked him further inside your slicken sex. 

“Touch yourself, baby,” he demanded. “Let me feel you fall apart around me.”

Your fingers slipped away from his hand, brushing down his flexed stomach as you made a path to your throbbing clit. The feather-like touch immediately sparked pleasure through your core. You clenched around his cock, whimpering with each circle of your fingertips. 

“I feel it, baby. I know you’re close.”

“Mhmm,” you whined.

Joel raised his body to press into your chest, one hand cradling your heavy breast, the other kneading the flesh of your ass. With his weight against your body, your hand pressed harder against your clit, the arousal pooling between where your bodies connect. 

Your head fell onto his shoulder, teeth sinking into his sweat-covered skin. Joel groaned at the sensation, only grounding you down harder onto his cock. You needed every atom of your being injected with Joel; every one of your senses evaded with his taste, touch, and scent. 

“Joel,” you mumbled, nestling your face into the crook of his neck. “I’m so close… so close.”

“I got you, baby. Gonna fall apart right here with you.”

He barely finished speaking by the time your orgasm ignited in your stomach, your body shuddering within his embrace. Joel spoke your name in broken syllables, his release pouring into you only moments later. 

Neither of you broke apart once your spasms subsided. Joel tangled a hand into the hair resting at the nape of your neck, urging your lips to his. Slotting your mouth over his, you slipped your tongue over his bottom lip, a starved search for a deeper connection. Joel fulfilled your need, devouring the soft sounds you exhaled.

Slowly—reluctantly—you tore from his lips, gasping for air to fill your lungs. Joel’s swollen lips formed into a crooked smile, his brown eyes softening the longer he gazed at you. Somewhere inside your chest, you felt that pain reawaken, a haunting reminder that you could have had this all along. Had the lies never been told… Joel would have always been yours. 

How did he survive the years of pain? How did he allow himself to let you go, knowing you’d never be satisfied with another?

A tear slipped down your cheek, and you turned your head to hide the emotions cresting over your face. Nothing went unnoticed with Joel, and he gently pinched your chin to bring your eyes back to his. With furrowed brows, Joel studied your features, the realization striking home for him, too.

“I know you’re scared, baby,” he whispered. “And I know there’s a lot I gotta fix between us, but I swear to you that I ain’t ever gonna leave again. I made that mistake once, and I’ll never do it again.”

“I want to trust you, Joel. I’m trying. But I don��t know how to forget what you’ve done… what everyone has done. There’s so much pain inside me. It’s unbearable.” 

Joel cradled your face in his hands, leveling you with a gaze you couldn’t discern. So many emotions swirled within his eyes, an endless expanse of grief that weighed him down. 

“Give me your pain. Give me all your anger and everything inside you, and I swear I’ll keep you safe. Y’ain’t ever gonna be alone again. Not while I’m still breathin’, baby. It’s you and me. Forever.”

“Forever,” you echoed. 

“Yes, forever. I don’t want another moment of my life without you in it. I can’t lose you again.”

“I can’t lose you, either,” you cried. “I never wanted to lose you in the first place, so please don’t leave.”

Joel’s eyes clouded with tears, and he shook his head. 

“I love you too much ever to leave you,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’m keepin’ you so long as y’let me.”

Eventually, you both made it out of the bed. Joel grumbled at your wishes to leave, keeping you in his arms and peppering your skin with kisses. It wasn’t long before your dizziness set back in, and you were demanding water and painkillers. 

As Joel poured you a glass of water, you found yourself swaying against the cold tile floors of the kitchen, the corners of your vision blurring. Your nails scratched at the kitchen countertop as you tried to suppress the lightheaded feeling creeping in. You just needed to sit…that’s all you needed. 

You called out Joel’s name the moment your knees buckled beneath you. His body moved in a foggy haze as you tried to keep consciousness, yet you were being pulled beneath the surface of your headache. Strong hands tucked themselves under your armpits, and Joel lowered you to the ground. 

“Baby?” His voice was frantic—strained. 

You mumbled a few incoherent words as your body sagged into his arms. Christ, your head ached. You hadn’t experienced a fainting spell since the accident, and you forgot how terrifying it was. 

Joel choked out your name, his hand snaking around your jaw to wag your head back and forth. You could see his silhouette over you, the shadow molding into the spots within your field of vision, but nothing else registered. Slipping. Drowning. You weren’t strong enough to fight it. Fear set your nerves alight; what if you lost it all again? What if everything melted away into the darkness consuming you? You clawed tooth and nail as your body plunged deeper into unconsciousness. 

It was no use. 

**

Joel paced the hallway outside your hospital room like a madman. The moment you went limp in his arms, he knew something was wrong. He should have taken your injury more seriously and urged you to the hospital yesterday. But he had you in his arms again, and the world would have had to fall apart before he even considered letting you go. Every admission from your lips weighed down on Joel’s shoulders, another swell of guilt growing inside him. He anticipated your anger, your grief, your heartbreak; he willingly listened without argument. His own struggles were nothing compared to what you endured, and he’d be damned if you ever felt those emotions again. Chewing at his nails, Joel glanced back at the open blinds of your hospital room. The doctors assured him you’d be okay; it was only a concussion, and there’d be no complications. That wasn’t enough for him. He needed to be absolutely sure you’d recover. 

The door cracked open, and Joel rushed toward the neurologist leaving your room. 

“How is she, doc?” Joel asked. “She’s gonna be okay, right?”

The neurologist, Dr. Oliver, nodded with a soft smile. The smile alone settled the rapid heartbeat banging against Joel's ribcage. 

“Miss Smith is going to be just fine,” Dr. Oliver reassured. “There’s going to be a long road to recovery, but I don’t see any long-term effects. I suggest you bring her in for check-ins with me every few months just to monitor her progress.”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course,” Joel nodded. 

“What I need you to do, Mr. Miller, is to help her. She may be a bit forgetful occasionally, so leaving lists around the house or notes will help keep her on track. You do live together, I assume?”

Joel rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous tick he had yet to learn how to shake. 

“We don’t, but if y’recommend it…”

“I recommend it, but only because she’ll need someone looking over for her. At least, until she regains enough cognitive strength to keep her memory at full capacity,” Dr. Oliver explained. 

“I can do that, Doc. All I want is for her to be okay.”

Dr. Oliver clapped a hand on Joel’s shoulder, his lips curving into a grin. Joel could finally breathe; you’d be okay. 

“You’re a good man, Mr. Miller. She’s lucky to have you here to care for her.”

“Thank you, Doc.”

“Give her some time to rest, and she’ll be clear to go home tomorrow.”

Dr. Oliver said his goodbyes to Joel and bounded down the hallway to other patients. Joel glanced at the open door, your sleeping frame tucked into the bed among the cords and beeping monitors. He entered quietly, his footsteps soft against the floor so he wouldn’t wake you. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Joel took your hand in his, cautious to avoid the IV tube taped onto your skin. Smoothing lines over the inside of your wrist, Joel watched you with weary eyes. 

“I love you, baby. I’m gonna be right here when y’wake up,” he vowed. “Like it always shoulda been.”

Leaning over your body, Joel pressed his lips against your forehead, inhaling your sweet scent as he pulled away. 

You’d be okay, and you’d forever be his. 

**

The harsh light above you reflected behind your eyelids. You groaned as you stirred awake, your eyes squinting to adjust to the layers of white surrounding you. Curling your fingers into the scratchy blanket, you found a familiar body sagged into a chair beside the bed. Joel slept peacefully, yet the worry lines creased between his brows. Extending your hand over the edge of the bed, you brushed your palm over his knee. 

“Joel,” you whispered. 

His body jolted upright as he scrubbed a hand down his face. Big, brown puppy dog eyes met yours, the concern in his face dissolving away once his eyes settled on yours. He made no effort to contain the smile breaking across his face. 

“Hey, handsome,” you croaked. 

“Baby,” Joel sighed, crouching beside the bed. “How’re y’feelin’?”

“A little fatigued, but I think I’ll live.”

“You better,” he chuckled. 

With your arms outstretched, you ushered Joel into an embrace. Joel’s lips crashed against yours the second he wrapped his arms around you, his touch soft and cautious. Beautiful melancholy emotions wracked your body; this was the moment you ached for from the start. To be held in your vulnerability, to be cherished, to be loved. Joel didn’t leave. He’d always be here, now. 

“There’s someone here to see you, baby,” Joel muttered against your mouth. 

You pulled away, confusion scrunching your eyebrows together. God, don’t let it be your family. 

“I know that look. Don’t worry, baby, I’ll be right back. I promise you’ll be happy,” Joel reassured. 

Joel disappeared from the room, and you sat up, settling back into the pillows. You glanced at the monitor beeping beside your bed, the steady line of your heart rate cruising along the screen. Footsteps sounded outside your room, and your eyes flicked back toward the door, a small silhouette hiding behind Joel’s large frame. 

Sarah. 

Her bright eyes looked between you and Joel, her stare quizzical–skeptic. You gave her a small wave, ushering her into the room. 

“Hi, Sarah,” you faltered. The tears were already forming on your waterline. 

“Hi, Miss Smith,” she said wearily. 

You patted the bed, scooting over to make room for her. Her steps were slow as she neared the bedside, her eyes glancing back at Joel. He gave her an encouraging nod, a knowing grin on his lips. 

“You don’t have to call me that,” you laughed softly. 

Sarah settled onto the bed, her tennis shoes swinging over the floor as she fidgeted with her curls. Joel leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest and a smile glued to his face. 

“But you’re my teacher,” she muttered. 

You tucked a loose strand behind her ear, the same hair you had braided and brushed years ago. She wasn’t yours, not by birth. But she was yours just as much as Joel was; she was your home. They weren’t just photos captured in time; they were real. They were real, and they were yours. 

“Do you remember when I used to read you bedtime stories?” You wondered aloud. “You would always ask for the same one over and over.”

There it was. The light sparkled in the gold flecks of Sarah’s eyes, the same gold that sat deep within Joel’s. 

“You and Dad would read The Kissing Hand every night,” she nodded. 

“I know you’re a lot older now, but do you remember what we would do before you fell asleep?”

You reached for Sarah’s hand, lifting it to your lips. With a soft kiss on her palm, you guided her hand to her cheek. Sarah’s eyes filled with tears as she leaned into your touch, the simple caress of your hand against her face enough to bring you both to the brink of crying. 

“I missed you, kiddo,” you cried softly. 

Sarah threw her arms around your neck, muffling her sobs into your hospital gown as you squeezed your arms tighter around her body. You missed so many milestones and moments of her life because of the accident, so many memories that were never made. Every family meal, every soccer game…you lost them all. 

You lifted your eyes, catching the moment Joel swiped away a tear from his cheek. Beckoning him over with a quick motion of your hand, he crossed the room in two quick strides and wrapped his large arms around you and Sarah. You rested your chin on Sarah’s shoulder, hugging her closer. Joel kissed the crown of Sarah’s head, then placed one on your forehead. 

“Wait,” Sarah blurted out, forcing you all to break apart. 

“What is it, sweetheart?” Joel asked, craning his head to look at her. 

“Does that mean you’re coming back home?” She asked. 

You looked at Joel for guidance, trying to find the answers within his gentle gaze. He waited in silence, giving you room to decide. There wasn’t a shadow of a doubt about your answer, not when you had everything you needed right here. 

“Only if you promise never to make pancakes again,” you smiled, pinching her cheek. 

She buried herself into your arms again, her head resting against your heart. You looked up at Joel, your mouth forming three little words. 

I love you. 

~ Two weeks later ~

Joel refused any help as he unloaded the last of your boxes from the back of his truck. When you got home from the hospital, you patched up the holes in the wall—with Joel’s help, of course—and got the house ready to sell. It barely lasted a week on the market before the offers came in, making it easy to start packing. That house was filled with memories you didn’t want to remember, memories that you no longer wanted to revisit. It wasn’t home to you anymore. 

You and Sarah sat on the front porch, popsicles in hand, watching as he huffed an exasperated breath once the box hit the steps. Joel straightened out, running sweaty hands down the sides of his jeans, glancing back at the empty truck bed. 

“Well, I think that’s the last of it,” Joel sighed. “Y’sure we ain’t miss anythin’?”

“I think I’ve got all I need right here,” you grinned, nudging Sarah with your shoulder. 

Joel plopped beside you on the porch, leaning over to lick up the sticky residue of the popsicle that had fallen down your arm. You gave him a warning look, shifting your eyes toward Sarah as if to say: Behave. He only shrugged, sticking out his tongue again to tickle your skin. 

“You hungry?” He asked, quirking a brow. 

“Starving!” Sarah declared, rising to her feet. 

You laughed, knowing Joel wasn’t asking her. Nonetheless, you and Joel followed her into the house hand in hand. Over the last couple of weeks, he had decorated the house in countless sticky notes: ones in the bathroom, the bedroom, the kitchen. Each said something important. The one in the bathroom was stuck on the medicine cabinet, reminding you which toothbrush was yours—the purple one. Joel stuck one by the front door with Sarah’s soccer schedule—snack duty included. There were a few scattered around the kitchen: one telling you where to find the coffee mugs, another one with a list of groceries to buy over the weekend. Three photos hung beside the list, sitting in perfect harmony as they always should have been.  But your favorite was stuck to the cover of Romeo and Juliet, Joel’s messy handwriting scribbled across the yellow paper. It was only a few words but the only reminder you needed. 

Welcome home, baby. 

I love you.

[milky-aeons]

— STAY

౨ৎ . . . the way in which CHUUYA NAKAHARA apologises after saying some things he did not mean.

warnings: swearing, arguments, hurt/comfort, female reader, jealousy, verbal fighting, glass smashing, emotional dysregulation, vulgarity, alcohol intake, pet-names, w.c 1.9k

♪ . . . ˗ˏˋ ꒰ stay — the kid LAORI, justin bieber ꒱ ˎ��-

You slammed the door with enough force to rattle it against its hinges.

That didn't stop Chuuya Nakahara from tearing it back open again.

He stormed into your shared hotel room after you. "Just what the hell is your problem, hah?!"

Fury was a blazing inferno in your eyes when you spun around to face him and all of his gall.

"My problem? My fucking problem!" You hissed, throwing your small clutch onto the bed. It bounced around until it hit the headboard, the small thump of it sounding like a warning shot. Quiet descended, tight, tenuous, stretching between the both of you until one of you decided to light the spark.

Your cheeks puffed out. You jabbed your finger at him. "How dare you blame me on all of this. You're the one that decided to act like an animal at a formal dinner and throw a champagne bottle at someone!"

Chuuya folded his arms, the lean muscles straining against his expensive blazer. "Not my fuckin' fault that the shithead couldn't stop ogling at ya. Like a lovesick puppy — he woulda started droolin' if I didn't do somethin' about it."

It hadn't been a detrimental business partner the organisation had just lost tribute to your General boyfriend and his temper — but they had been high enough in the drugs underworld that the Port Mafia would take a serious blow, because of it. The Boss was bound to not take this lightly. Although whatever punishment awaited you when you returned to headquarters was not the dominant thought that made your heart thrum an angry rhythm. It was not what called blood to your flushed cheeks, your arms to flail out in frustrated, furious movements.

"You can't just go for any man that wants to look at me, Chuuya!" You shouted, your arms stretched wide in an obvious gesture.

His eyes hardened. "Can't I?"

"No! That's irrational. You'll start fights with organisations worth more trouble than you need, all because you can't keep your damn temper under control!"

Too worked-up to stay in the same place, Chuuya had begun to move. Aimless, jittery pacing that circled around your hotel suite. He stalked over to the small table in the corner decorated with complimentary crystal glasses and a whiskey tumbler, and poured himself a healthy serving. His rock hard shoulders — so wound and tense — didn't even shift when he knocked the entire drink down in one swig.

He said nothing.

The silence was so pressing, so agitating. Like a thousand tiny pinpricks dancing down the planes of your skin. There was a quiet, rational little voice that cooed at you in the back of your mind; whispering that this wasn't worth it, that it would be better to let him calm down before you broached the subject like two adults in love. You were a level headed woman — that voice was usually your pillar of reason. So why was it that tonight, after the carnage that had ensued, you were itching for a fight rather than trying to diffuse the ticking time bomb this situation was turning into.

You didn't care.

You were on fire. You were livid.

You had to burn.

"Oh, so you're gonna ignore me now, huh?" The words were flying past your lips against conscious will. You noticed the way Chuuya's neck muscles jumped at the grating tremour in your voice. "You think that's how we should deal with it — just sweep it under the rug?"

A sound; akin to a growl, rumbled in his chest. "Just drop it, princess."

"No. No, I won't drop it. You can't parade me around like I'm yours to claim, Chuuya! I'm a person. I can speak to men if I so please, or do you want to shove me into a pretty cage, tell me to just blink and smile?"

"I said," Chuuya's tone rose. His temper was becoming hard to control, again. Fraying at the edges until it was uncertain where he stood. "To drop it, princess."

"Oh — and another fucking thing—!"

SMASH!

First, there was the sound. Then your startled brain, catching up, watching as the rain shower of glass shards smattered over the red carpet. You gasped, your eyes wide, darting them back to your lover who had just hurled his empty whiskey glass so forcefully against the wall it had exploded into pieces. He rounded on you, and you've never seen his eyes look so frightening. They burned a cold fire, morphing the beautiful planes of his face into something sharper, something more alien.

The man who stalked over to you with quick snapping strides was not your tender boyfriend who hugged you close to his chest at night and murmured into your hair. Now, he was a ruthless Mafia Executive, and he was furious.

"You're such a fuckin' blabbermouth, y'know that? Always lettin' it run, like you did with that guy at the dinner table. If your mouth is that loose then, baby doll, why don't you just let him fuck it, since you seem to like using it so damn much?"

His words were so unexpected, so cruel, that they twisted into harsh daggers and speared right for your heart. It was almost like you had been physically struck; the way you gasped, how you took a small step back at the force of it. Your lips parted and you drew in a shaky breath. Something must have given way on your face — because in a blink, the storm in Chuuya's eyes parted. He refocused. And when he did, his expression softened somewhat. The echoes of his words crackled around like the broken pieces of his whiskey glass.

Pressure began to build at the back of your eyes. You ducked your head so it hid underneath your styled bangs.

Chuuya bristled. He took a small step forward, his hand twitching out.

"Baby... [Name], I—"

You twisted out of his reach and stormed around him. Your heels pounding against the floor until you reached the bathroom, throwing yourself inside and shutting the door. Through the blood pumping in your ears, you thought you heard him call out to you, and then he was there; on the other side of the door that you leaned against. You knew he was there — always knew when your partner in crime was nearby, be it by the pattern of his breathing, the sound of his footsteps. You closed your eyes and leaned your head against the door, cursing when the tears brimmed over.

There was a loud thump on the other side of the wood. You couldn't see, but Chuuya had pitched forward to lean his head against the door.

"Baby, open the door. Please. That was fucked of me — I'm sorry."

The bottom of your lip wobbled — you sucked it between your teeth, trying to stifle the little sob that hiccupped in your throat. You wanted him to leave. You wanted him to tear the door down and fight to get to you. Your chest hurt so much; like there had been a hole ripped in the middle of it. His words played over and over again in your mind and stretched that hole all the more wider.

"Baby doll," Chuuya whispered, knocking softly. "Baby, please, please open the door."

You're such a fuckin' blabbermouth, y'know that?

"I'm sorry. [Name], you're right. I'm a shitshow when I can't control my temper. I'm a fuckin' mess in that department and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, princess. You don't fuckin' deserve that."

If your mouth is so loose then, baby doll, why don't ya just let him fuck it?

You shook your head from side to side. "No. No I don't." You sniffed. "Fuck you, Chuuya."

"Deserve that." He murmured.

"You're such an asshole, sometimes."

"Deserve that, too."

"Absolute pain in my ass."

"Now you're just being nice."

A broken little chuckle tried to rumble up your throat. Damn him, making you laugh when you were supposed to be seething at the teeth. You reached up to rub the streaks of tears from your cheeks with the back of your hands. You stole a quick glance in the bathroom mirror, and contemplated splashing some water on your face to tame the angry red puffiness. No. He needed to know how badly that had hurt you. Let him see you in this mess, let him feel the guilt.

You huffed and turned around, gripping the handle of the door and pulling it open.

He was centimetres away. His hat had been discarded; the wildfire tendrils of his curly hair stuck up in all directions; like he had been furiously raking his hand through it. Chuuya's eyes widened when you were suddenly in front of him again, and then they shuttered.

"Oh, baby," He choked out. Then, like it was instinctive, went to reach for you—

One of your hands came up in between you two, instructing him to stop in his tracks. You levelled your watery eyes on his, waiting. It didn't take long for him to get the memo.

His throat bobbed when he swallowed. "I'm sorry," He said, throwing every ounce of his energy into it. While your mafioso lover wasn't the best at regulating his emotions, you had a lot more respect for yourself than that, and were willing to wait.

Your eyebrows rose. "For?"

"Being an asshole."

"And?"

"Sayin' such a shitty thing to ya."

"And?"

Chuuya grumbled something indistinct under his breath. He flickered his eyes down and shifted his weight. He scowled. But not long passed before he spat out the words;

"For throwin' the bottle at that lovesick little asshole."

You let his words hang in the air, let them dissipate and wash against the hurt in your chest. Being with Chuuya Nakahara wasn't easy — but neither was love in any relationship. You had your fights, you had your nasty fights that brought out things none of you wanted to say, nor really meant. But it always ended like this; with either one of you seeking the other out, desperate to restore the balance, to take back everything you said.

It wasn't a good cycle. But it was one that you both worked on, day by day, piece by piece. And you promised it would be worth it. Every stubborn little inch of it.

The moment your shoulders collapsed with your sigh — Chuuya took it as his sign. He passed the threshold of the bathroom, eager to dispel the distance between you both. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled you into his chest. Your eyes slipped closed as the scent of him enveloped you; leather and smoke, with a hint of his expensive cologne he saved for events just like this.

His grip tightened. You felt the splay of his long fingers hidden in leather in the valley between your shoulders; exposed by the backless ballgown.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, his voice so uncharacteristically small. Chuuya turned to bury into your neck and you let him, bringing your hand to rub soothingly against his head.

You turned into his chest and burrowed further. Listening to his erratic heartbeat, wondering if it belonged to him or the god of destruction sharing part with his body. But when you looked up at him; into those eyes that were all the shades of blue, all Chuuya Nakahara, you had your answer loud and clear.

They flickered over your face in that moment. He reached up, padding the damp skin underneath your eyes tenderly. "I'm—"

You didn't let him finish — instead, you raised up on the balls of your feet and connected your lips. A soft, heart breaking kiss, your hands coming to rest on either side of his face, his hand cradling the back of your head gingerly — like you were made of glass, and this time, he wouldn't break it. Wouldn't even dare.

The kiss reminded you why it was worth it — why this was worth it. Why there was nothing in this world that could make you give up on each other.

requested by lovely nonnie!

[cloudinterlude]

for endgame i would've liked the idea of using the trope of like the heroes do a massive sacrifice (knowing that 5 years passed, fighting thanos twice, knowing all that they lost etc) but no one knows but them. so they have to carry that guilt/knowledge for the rest of their life but the rest of the world can't thank them for it cause they don't know.

i don't mind that they didnt undo the snap, generally but what i don't like is that it seems like they built a story that ended in the snap but forgot to plan ahead to show the after-snap. they can't just go back to happy mcu with that massive loss (of resources, of families, of people) looming in the background, you know?

(btw this isn't me arguing just sharing thoughts! i don't want to start a fight or anything like that in the comments lmao i know endgame is a sore spot for many) 💜

First, I know you weren't starting a fight at all! <3 I love hearing other people's opinions on the MCU and even if you were looking for a fight, I also like arguing, so win-win either way!

Now onto the submission! See, I totally get that. I also love that trope a whole lot and it allows for a lot of intrigue and psychological angst and character studies - really up my alley! But I had my reservations about it. One, I just don't think the writer's would handle it properly - it has a lot of potential to be great and unfortunately has a lot more potential to go wrong. But the most important thing is that I just don't think it would fit their characters. Right off the bat, Steve, Tony and Bruce would be extremely against it. Steve and Bruce because of the ethics surrounding it and Tony because, well, his daughter. I don't think that's a sacrifice Tony is (permanently) ever gonna make and I don't think the others would dare to ask that - especially considering other kids during the 5 years passed as well. Characterization has always been higher priority than plotting to me. And while I do love that trope just like you, I just don't see the Avengers breaking that barrier.

However, I do fully agree with you're other point. The MCU did not handle the fallout well. They didn't really portray how damn devastating to the whole fucking world an event like that would be. Damn near apocalyptic. Like, I don't think we can emphasize enough how catastrophic the snap should have been. But it was kind of treated like just another superhero battle event. And now it's just a backdrop to the universe. Like it's just something that happened and now there are mentions of it, but nothing much. And really, I get it. Maybe people aren't that into watching the breakdown of something like that...maybe they can't really afford the time and effort to flesh it out, but it would have been absolutely AMAZING it they did. It was a total breakdown and chaos of all societies. That is a fucking goldmine to me. I woulda been all over an exploration of it. Sadly, we weren't fed on that front.

Thanks sm anon! <3

[sukirichi]

sweet lies [02]

His lies were way too sweet – and you were too addicted to make him stop.

cw. explicit smut, slight body worship, public sex, dirty talk, praising, toxic megumi, fwb dynamics, slight angst, body marking, sukuna bullying megumi, age gap, scratching, mentions of oral (m receiving) and mutual masturbation, the traditional unedited fic

note. choose your fighter, megumi or sukuna 😈 also UHM do you guys want me to make the ending angsty or fluffy? i wrote out two versions so LOL let me know what you think! we’ll get more of the megumi scenes on the next chapter though~

series masterlist | 01 | 02 | 03

Sukuna isn’t kidding when he said he’ll have you unable to walk by the end of this.

You’ve lost count of how many times you guys have fucked.

Once more in the stalls when you thought of repaying the favor by sucking him off, followed by him growing impatient and hauling you inside his car. Both of you were too tired to go for another round, but were still very much addicted for the other’s touch that mutual masturbation seems like the best option.

Thankfully, Sukuna’s cut his nails, so having three of his fingers buried knuckle deep in you feels like absolute heaven. He’s not complaining about your smooth hands wrapped around his shaft either, especially not when you’ve had enough practice with Megumi to know just how to make a guy lose his mind. By the time you’ve made it back home, Sukuna’s grown hard again, too impatient to make it to the bed before he just fucks you raw against the wall. You’re trembling at his hold, left with no choice but to trust his strength to drop you on his cock and bounce you to his pleasure.

It’s a miracle you’ve made it on the bed.

His digital clock reads a quarter at three in the morning, and for a moment, you worry about how tired you’ll be in class tomorrow when Sukuna’s large hands grips your thighs sharply.

“Goddamn,” he hisses through clenched teeth, chuckling at the irresistible sight of your breasts bouncing before him. Limbs tangled, minds controlled with the primal need to fuck, and moans shared with his deep grunts – you somehow end up on top of him, your thighs feeling like they’re on the verge of giving up as you continue to ride his thick length.

“You are so fucking sexy,” he slaps your ass and causes your hips to rut deeper, forcing that delicious curve of his cock to meld with your walls. You throw your head back, palms planted on his chest, focused only on that burning pleasure between your thighs. “I could fuck you all night long.”

Even though you truly have no wish to, you shake your head, fingers balling into a fist. “I have class tomorrow, need to wake up early,” you protest, the words falling into deaf ears as Sukuna thrusts up into you. He must’ve noticed how you’re growing tired and took matters into his own hands, feet grounded on the mattress to pound deliriously into you. You’re debating whether to be thankful or frustrated he still has so much energy even after hours of fucking, but it honestly doesn’t matter. You’re falling into his chest, arms slipping on your equally sweat-covered bodies. Right now, you just wanted to cum – once more, again, one last time! “Ah, Sukuna, t-too much!”

“Too much?” he laughs and tangles his hand to caress your scalp, the gesture too soothing that you almost forgot he’s fucking you into oblivion. “Want me to go slow?”

“No…”

“Thought so, sweetheart,” his grin is absolutely cocky as he bends his knees in a fold, pushing you until your back rests on his muscular thighs. Your mouth falls open at his hands wrapping around your threat, keeping you right there, hips flat and grinding on his cock. “Come on. Come for me,” Sukuna urges, tightening his hold around your neck a little harder.  

That’s all you need for your vision to blur and see stars, your body’s shaking uncontrollable. He’s thrusting with all his power and energy that it feels like you’re nothing but a hole on top of him, tongue falling open in a wanton manner as your drool trails down your chin.

You look filthy, you feel filthy, and yet, Sukuna sees it entirely different.

“So – fucking – gorgeous, fuck. I woulda fucked you sooner if I didn’t feel weird about it.”

“What?”

“Aw, come on, sweetheart,” he smirks at your half fucked out state. Sukuna rolls his hips in such a mind numbing manner that you end up staring at the ceiling, trying your hardest to decipher the colors of his room to get a grip of yourself. But he feels so hot, cock throbbing and pulsing inside you, your puffy lips encasing him with a translucent ring of cum and it feels so fucking good you don’t really understand what he’s saying anymore. “Did you really think I never saw you in my dreams?” he slaps your ass again, the reflexive response of tightening around him pulling a deep groan from the beautiful man beneath you. “I have such a sexy roommate, I couldn’t help it.”

“Then why didn’t you – ah, right there, shit – tell me?”

“Cuz,” he snickers and finally lets you breathe, your pupils blowing wide from the sudden flow of air. Sukuna kneads your breasts greedily, never stopping his mind-numbing rhythm of ramming deep into you. Your body burns, your thighs ache, your pussy feels sensitive but you can’t find the energy to stop him. Instead, you fall prey, failing in your mission to keep him wrapped around your fingers because now you’re wrapped around his cock, and you were quite fucking addicted to it. “You’re my friend’s student. Felt so fucking wrong.”

“What’s the difference now?”

“The difference is,” Sukuna’s face contorts into something of discomfort for a moment before he leans forward, his sturdy grip homing in on your hips again. You feel his searing breath on your ear, so parching it puts the warmth of your pussy to shame. “Having you like this has never felt so right, and I’ll keep fucking you if you let me.”

“I-I’d let you,” you concede absentmindedly and capture his lips for a sloppy kiss, tongues giving up on a battle of dominance. You’re always so clingy when you’re about to come, something Megumi never fails to chastise you for, and you fear Sukuna might push you away as you wrap an arm around him, nails painfully scratching down his back. Red marks leave a trail on its wake until his blood pierces through the sheets, the pain manifested through the increasing roughness of his pace. Now it’s your turn to whimper in his ear, pulling the man close and tugging harshly at the ends of his hair. Gosh, were you actually crying? “Sukuna, I’m close! Yes, yes, right there!”

Sukuna groans at the erotic sounds you reward him with. “Come for me, that’s right, ohhhh,” he stills inside you, his seed spilling deep inside you. You wince at the burst of warmth spreading all over your belly and Sukuna chuckles at your bulging belly. He presses down on it to coax his cum to trickle all over his cock, and he’s fucking filthy – you learn easily – to watch you make a mess on his cock with a childish smile on his face.

You push yourself off him and fall to his side, him following suit not long afterwards. The room feels completely stuffed from your intense fucking, the bruises on your body and scratches on his back a huge attestment to that.

Your legs remain wide open as you clench around nothing, his cum oozing out like a waterfall. Sukuna (that damned pervert) dips two fingers into your hole for one last moment just to drench his fingers in it, his eyes lit up in wonder while he lets it web around his fingers. You snicker at his actions and roll to his side, eyes fluttering close from the wave of exhaustion that comes into full force.

The lingerie set you intended to wear for Megumi was now ripped at the other side of the room, discarded, forgotten – merely evidence of a moment that had never been given to him.

Oddly enough, you don’t feel bad, not even when Sukuna faces you, his cheeks squished by his soft pillows. “I’m spent. I don’t think I’ve ever been this tired. My gym sessions can’t compare to this.”

“You go to the gym?”

“Yeah. I wasn’t born this gorgeous, you know. I had to work hard for this,” Sukuna gestures to his body. You can’t help but follow the gestures and admire the hard planes of his muscle ripped above one another, the smatter of dark hair leading down his hips adding to his already immense sexual charisma. It makes you want to jump on him all over again, and you have to bite your lip to resist that urge, rolling your eyes at him in favor of letting him know you could totally go for another round.

“Dork.”

“Got me laid though, was worth the effort,” he jokes, and you both laugh.

It’s actually…weird, to laugh so casually with someone like this. It might be normal for Sukuna in his past sexual endeavors, but it’s totally a different thing for you. You and Megumi had never even bothered with aftercare. As long as he’s satisfied himself, he’d clean himself off in the bathroom and wear his sweatpants, winking at you before he leaves you alone all over again. The memory – albeit not really a regrettable one – is still painful each time you’re reminded you’ll keep coming back to him.

But are things different now? Could you go back to Megumi? You only ever wanted to fuck Sukuna because you’re sad and horny, but it wouldn’t be fair to him, especially when your roommate has been nothing but nice to you. Besides, him being a little more decent doesn’t immediately equate he’s different than Megumi.

For all you know, you could just be another cheap fuck. Sukuna is older and sexier, after all, he’s clearly had a lot more experience than you do.

As if reading your mind, Sukuna rests his head on his palms, elbows flat on the bed as he turns to you. The expression on his face is unreadable, but there’s some sort of softness behind it – a softness you’re not really familiar with.

“Hey. I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, not everything, anyway, but whatever we have right now, I want you to know it’s not because I see just as a pretty pussy, okay?” he says with a straight face, but you really shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up because Sukuna smirks, mischievous eyes darting back and forth to your soaked pussy and bare breasts. “Although you do have a pretty pussy. Can I eat you out again?”

With that, you snatch the pillow underneath him and whack it straight at his face. Sukuna laughs at your protests, the sound growing louder and a lot more mocking the harder you hit him. “Gosh, Sukuna, shut up!”

You end up hitting him way too many times in the face that he can’t get his words through, and before you could react, Sukuna’s ripped the pillow away from you. He cages you in his arms and hovers over you once more, his boneless dick grazing the insides of your thigh. It’s not meant to be sexual, and nothing about his stance gives off anything that shows he wants to do it again, but you can’t help but feel aroused, shifting your legs up and down the bed as you squirm.

“Seriously though,” he repeats, “We can be casual, or this could be a one time thing. Card’s all yours to play. If you want to forget everything tomorrow, I’d gladly do it. Let’s just go back to the way we were-”

“Sukuna.”

“Yes?”

“Did you really think I was only using you to distract myself?”

Sukuna’s lips flatten into a line. “I’m not stupid,” he says somberly, “I could tell you were still thinking about him. Not that I mind, though, you can’t stop yourself from loving someone,” Faintly, you’re distracted by his thumbs rubbing at your pulse point. It’s so lulling you want to fall asleep, but Sukuna isn’t done talking. “My point is…you don’t have to worry about being weird with me. We could just be friends with benefits, if you want, and not the kind you have with your boy toy either. ”

His blatantly catches you off guard and your eyes widen before they narrow at him, trying your best to hide your embarrassment. If Megumi was painfully honest, Sukuna’s ridiculously blunt that his mere words make your heart do weird things you’d rather not feel.

Careful, you remind yourself, Megumi is the one you want. You have to keep reminding yourself that before your feelings get the best of you. It’s Megumi, it’s always been Megumi and it always will be Megumi. Sukuna is just your roommate who’s nice enough to take your mind off things. You only wish you weren’t lying too much in case he gets the wrong idea you’re leading him on, but then again, isn’t that what you’re doing?

Friends with benefits or not – you still have no plans on getting involved with this guy any longer.

It’s always Megumi. You just really needed a quick fuck, someone whose dick didn’t belong with the guy you’re so hung up on over. The change feels nice and you definitely feel a lot better than the last time you met Megumi, but this guilt…it tastes bitter on your tongue, too heavy to swallow and ignore. It’s always Megumi, you tell yourself again in an attempt to relieve your pain.

Though it doesn’t subside and you huff in exasperation, turning away from Sukuna. You can’t stand looking at him right now.

“I’m not,” you mumble weakly, but the tears – the guilt, the heartbreak of not being Megumi’s lover, the regret and the ironic need to be closer to Sukuna feels all so confusing – all threaten to burst through. You don’t want him to see you cry, that would be lame, so you scoot closer to him and kiss his shoulder as you shyly ask, “C-can we cuddle?”

“Of course,” he chuckles, pulling you closer, “You don’t have to sound too nervous to ask.”

“Sorry, it’s just-”

“He never does that?”

“…Yeah.”

“Well, I’m not him,” Sukuna answers confidently, surprising you when he grabs your ass to press you flush against him. You’re both sweaty and hot to the point it’s uncomfortable, but Sukuna smells so sweet with his lingering cologne that you can’t help yourself from planting your face in his neck, breathing in the little hums he makes. Sukuna kisses the crown of your head – which is a little too sweet than you’d like – while his other hand runs down your back in a slow, sensual manner. Hell, it feels close to body worshipping, and you hate that you silently want more of this. “I’d cuddle you every day if you asked me to.”

“You’re surprisingly sweet,” you voice with a smile. Sukuna’s chest rumbles from the low laughter, and like that, you cling to him like he’s the only sturdy pillar in your life. It’s pathetic, maybe even desperate, but if he doesn’t mind, then why should you?

However, the moment is quickly ruined when the bell rings. “Shit, I forgot he was coming over!”

Sukuna glares at the door and holds you tighter, almost possessively, and refuses to let you go even as you squirm under him. “At three in the morning?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to meet him right now,” you groan helplessly.

Sukuna shoots you a blank look after that, then shoots out of the bed in an instant. You watch as he quickly dresses up in a fresh pair of sweatpants, grabbing a random hoodie from the back of his chair, presumably to hide the scratch marks. You have to hide your smile behind your hand because he looks so drool-worthy with marks littered on his already marked skin, and the fact he lets you mark him is even hotter.

He pauses at the door for a moment, pointing a finger at where you peered up at him curiously. “Stay there. I’ll talk to him and say you went out or whatever. Just make sure to silence your phone in case he calls. Better yet, turn it off.”

Sukuna closes the door behind him, already on the way to the entrance just as you press your ears against the door to eavesdrop. There’s a slight shuffling before the door unlocks, then, “Why the fuck did you lock-” Megumi pauses in his words, and you can perfectly picture his infamous scowl painting his handsome features already. Gosh, you wish you could actually see it, but if Megumi catches you sleeping with someone else, he might totally lose interest in you. That’s not something you could afford to happen.

“Oh. You’re her roommate.” You snigger at his usual what the fuck tone – how Megumi of him.

“Hey, kid, it’s a little too late for a visit, don’t you think?” Sukuna taunts, and it takes everything in you to not burst through the door at that moment. You’re stuck between wanting to laugh and crying, mostly because you would love and hate for Megumi to get riled up. “Do your parents know you’re here? Kids shouldn’t be out this late.”

“I’m not a fucking kid, I’m in uni,” he defends, “Do you know where Y/N is? I need to talk to her.”

Deciding fuck it, you open the door by an inch, just enough to peek. As expected, Megumi is glaring behind Sukuna’s shoulders in search of you. Meanwhile, Sukuna’s completely calm, checking his nails boredly as if Megumi isn’t fuming in front of him. And boy, do you know how much Megumi hates being ignored. “Oh, I think she went out, I don’t know why though. House was empty when I got here.”

“She didn’t tell you where she was going?”

At Megumi’s imposing tone, Sukuna tilts his head to scrutinize Megumi. Now that you’re seeing them together, Sukuna’s twice the size of Megs, their height and shoulder width too different to start comparing. But knowing Megumi, he’s not going to back down from a tattooed guy twice his size, not even as he sarcastically remarks, “Ain’t you her friend? She should be telling you that kind of stuff.”

Truthfully, you expected he would put up more of a fight. The two of them share a heated staring competition before Megumi scoffs, the first one to look away. “Whatever,” he dismisses, “Tell her to pick her damn phone up. I’ve been calling for the past hour.”

“I think I should tell her to get better friends.”

“What was that?”

“I said get home safely,” Sukuna chirps. Even with his back turned to you, you could tell Sukuna’s just further pressing his buttons with a grin that’s not meant to be inviting at all. Just when you think it’s done, however, Sukuna finishes off with, “Kid.”

Megumi rages. His blue eyes flame into something feral, his fists balled at his sides. He’s always had a temper issue and you nearly reveal yourself to stop whatever fight is about to ensue, but Sukuna’s already closing the door, ridding any opportunity for the younger one to retaliate. At the sound of the door closing, Sukuna leans against the door, his smile still plastered on his face as if he knows you’re watching the whole time. He meets your eyes from the slight peep of his door, waving his hands sarcastically.

“Sukuna, you didn’t have to be so mean.”

“Sorry,” he isn’t apologetic at all. “Next time I’ll be nicer to your asshole crushes,” he adds with a slight roll of his eyes and you punch his chest playfully. You don’t stop him from grabbing your wrists to embrace you in a hug that doesn’t seem so platonic – but not so suggestive either. Sukuna rests his chin on top of your hand while he sways you both side to side, his voice muffled in your hair. “I understand why you’re attracted to him though. He’s really handsome.”

“Yeah, he is,” you agree sadly, thinking of how much it’s really all a waste Megumi has to be like that. “Just sucks his personality ruins everything.”

“A pretty face is always deceiving,” Sukuna suddenly pulls away and holds you an arm’s length away.  “Hey, want to have early breakfast?”

“I think that would be late dinner,” you frown at him.

“Whatever, food is food,” he responds rather excitedly, and you watch as Sukuna rummages through the fridge. Now that you think about it, having sex so much really took a toll on you, and your stomach grumbles loudly. Sukuna hides his chuckles through the fridge but you hear him anyway, shouting at him that you’re not hungry. “Wasn’t asking, sweetheart. Now go get cleaned and changed, I’ll make something for you.”

If anyone were to tell you that a good fucking is all that’s needed for you to immediately form a new kind of friendship with your roommate, you’d call them weird. Sukuna isn’t necessarily out of reach, you and him just simply didn’t cross paths.

But now, you’re dressed comfortably in his boxers and the oversized shirt you stole from him, eating the slightly burn cheese sandwich he’s made, sharing conversation and laughing with him like you’ve been doing it for such a long time. Your sandwich is actually half forgotten on the plate as you whack your palms on the counter, “That’s how you and Prof Gojo met? I never would’ve expected you guys fought over a girl!”

“He was fucking annoying in high school,” Sukuna grumbles over an angry bite, “He was getting all the girls that when someone confessed to me, the hottest chick, no less, he straight up punched me in the face,” you laugh as you imagine the memory of a younger, already rebellious looking Sukuna getting smacked by the even more intolerable Gojo Satoru. Sukuna is lost in his own memories as well, shaking his head from around the last bites of his bread. It’s clear he hates the burnt crust judging from the way he turns a little green, but he’s bragged about his cooking skills so proudly that he has to save face in front of you. “Ah, such good times,” he muses before wincing at his own words, dropping his bread in disgust. “Damn, I sound old, don’t I?”

“You’re only like, five years older than me, it’s fine,” you giggle, “I like the maturity that comes with older people. You’re a lot easier to be with than guys my age.”

“Please,” Sukuna smirks, “Just say you like fucking older men. I won’t judge.”

If anyone were to tell you that you would be jumping over the counter to strangle your roommate who’s now running like hell, your laughter bursting through the once silent apartment, you would call them a liar. But now, you and Sukuna are panting on the floor, too tired from sprinting all around before calling it quits. Maybe it’s a lie – maybe this connection will never really be that much of a big deal – but as long as this lie and play pretend of friendship lasts, you’ll just enjoy every sweet moment of it.

taglist (lmk if you want to be added/removed) (bold can’t be tagged) @uwubby-1 @expectoscamander @your-consulting-fangirl @dora-the-grownup @cosmotoic @charlie-xo @kittaliapenn @sukunas-cult-leader @flowersgirl02 @cloudsinthecosmos @90s-belladonna @averysheart-raleighsdick @generousstudentpsychic-bat @kat-su-ki @issamomma​ 

[buckybardot]

Sensitive Thighs

MY HERO ACADEMIA

Pro Hero!Bakugou Katsuki x Sensitive Thighed!Reader

A/N: just some messy headcanons with our favorite angry boy. Slightly NSFW.

Bakugou finds out you have sensitive thighs pretty early on in your relationship

One night when your at his apartment and things start to get a little hot ‘n heavy on the couch, he brings down a hand to grip the supple skin of your thigh

And you too lost in his kisses let out too obvious of a whimper into his mouth, jolting a little in his hold

He pulls back from your lips, not quite clicking together what caused that reaction, his eyes searching your expression

All he finds is swollen lips, flushed cheeks and the doe eyes you make for only him

As he goes to speak he moves his hand again, giving a little reassuring squeeze while moving further up your thigh

You inhale quickly, your body responding before you could stop it as you arch towards him, and it clicks in Bakugou’s mind

Sweet spot located

As if to prove his thoughts true, he brings his other hand to the opposite thigh to match, and does the same dragging motion again

“You okay, angel?”

You can hear the smirk clear through his gravelly tone

Everything gets a little more hazy as you try to joke out a reply

“I just-“ you try to defend yourself before Bakugou dives for your neck, weight shifting to move you underneath him now

Another moan slips out, and he groans in response, blending into his kisses

“Didn’t know you had sensitive thighs, babe,” he speaks gruffly, muffled by your skin

You blush, bringing your hands up into his blonde hair, “Didn’t think it was important info to share-“

He laughs a little bit, moving to sit back on his heels above you

God, his vermillion stare ripping across your body sent heat straight to your core

“Oh trust me, it is, idiot.” he muttered, pulling his shirt over his head and carelessly throwing it somewhere in the room

You brought your knees together, feeling vulnerable with him towering over you as you in turn shed your shirt, pants already thrown somewhere too

How was he so gorgeous? Thick ropes of muscle over his shoulders and arms, a taut abdomen and chest littered with scars from pro hero work. Big, tough hands that could ruin you in a second (whether from explosions or something else, we’ll never know). You don’t know what you did to earn your former classmate’s affection, but damn were you going to cherish every second with him

He chided you, pulling you out of you thoughts as he spread your knees again

“Don’t hide from me, angel, I want all of you.”

He said it so nonchalantly like he wasn’t already making your stomach flip in anticipation

He backed up a little before lowering himself, this time to position his face in between your thighs, making your heart jump in your throat

You could feel his heated breath on your core over your panties, and suddenly it was incredibly hard to think

“You should have told me sooner, woulda done this a lot more,”

Before you had time to question what he meant he kissed your inner thigh, one of his palms coming up to squeeze the opposing leg

His sloppy kisses turned into tender bites, mingling sucking on your soft skin with the sharpness of his canines

Let’s just say he was reveling in the noises he was pulling from your throat

“Fuck, Katsuki-“

It was almost too much, the chills traveling your nerves, the heat radiating from his body, how close he was nearing to your clothed pussy

But he just moved over to the other inner corner of your thigh where his hand was previously, like he didn’t know how crazy he was driving you

One thing that Bakugou Katsuki is for sure, is he’s a fucking tease during foreplay

When he’s inside you, he has a much harder time restraining himself (I mean, come on, how is he supposed to not lose himself when that pretty body of yours just keeps sucking him in?)

but when he’s focused on your pleasure...let’s just say good luck

“I’m just getting started,” he groaned out, starting to grind his hips into the couch underneath him

Fuck, you were in for a long night

After he learns and experiments with this new found weakness of yours, he fully intends to use it against you, not just in the bedroom

When your all out with friends, he is sure as hell is going to keep a hand on your thigh any time he can

He loves sitting next to you, watching you keep a steady face as he presses his fingers into his previous bite marks, watching goosebumps rise on your arm

He figures out it’s the easiest way to rile you up fast

And let’s be honest, the more he finds out and learns about how your body works, the bigger his ego gets

His pride swells when he has is pretty little baby underneath him, whimpering about how good the great Dynamight makes her feel

[thatrandomwriter]

Reunited

Merle Dixon x reader

Warnings: cursing, mentions of violence, sexual language

I was pacing my cell, Judith asleep on my shoulder, Beth and Carl in the next cell over, talking quietly so as not to awake the baby. Carol and Hershel had also stayed behind, likely attempting to make a meal with what little food we had. For once, I wasn’t hungry, my stomach churning as I thought of Rick, Daryl and the others attempting to save Maggie and Glenn from Woodbury. For all I knew, they could already be dead. Ambushed by walkers, outgunned by the Governor’s men. Or worse, taken prisoner themselves, to be tortured as Glenn and Maggie probably were. I shook my head, clearing it of the thought. I had to try and stay optimistic, if only for the sake of Beth, Carl and Judith.

It had been one of the longest nights of my life. Sleep had been impossible, and as the sun rose, with every passing minute it seemed less and less likely that the group would return. I sat around a table with the others, doing my best to hide my fear and put on a smile as Beth played peekaboo with a giggling Judith. Suddenly, I heard the sounds of the gates opening, and I shot to my feet. Maggie and Glenn were first through the door, and I ran to hug them both. Beth wasn’t far behind me, sobbing as she saw her sister for the first time in days. The rest of the group followed, the only missing member being Oscar, who we had met at the prison. Relief washed over me, and then guilt at my lack of sadness at the loss. But my people, my family were safe, and I could feel sad later. For now, relief was all my brain could process. Last through the door was a man who I didn’t recognise for a second, but as soon as he made eye contact with me, I recognised him as - 

“Merle?” Before he could answer me, I was rushing forward to fling my arms around him, a gesture which he quickly returned, enveloping me in a tight hug. He was uncharacteristically quiet, and I realised that he was trying to hide his emotions, his breathing ragged as he clung onto me. I pulled back slightly to take in his face, more serious than I remembered, though just as handsome.

“Damn darlin’, ya look just as good as I remember,” He glanced down, eyes lingering on my cleavage, and I hit him lightly on the shoulder. Someone, probably Daryl, made a derisive noise in the background.

Merle seemed to remember that everyone else was in the room, expression shifting from the closest he could get to sincere to his signature grin. He finally pulled away completely, and I noticed the blade protruding from his arm where his hand used to be. Clearly we had some serious catching up to do. At the beginning, back when we were camped outside of Atlanta, Merle had been virtually glued to my side. At first, he had denied that this was to do with anything other than trying to get in my pants. It had taken weeks for him to even entertain the idea of liking me for anything more than that, but the more time we spent together the more undeniable it had become. Until, of course, Rick had left him handcuffed to a roof in the city. We had gone back for him the next day, but we were too late. All that was left of Merle was his hand, and a trail of blood. Everyone had assumed him dead until now. Now, when his arm was around my waist, like he had never been gone.

“He was with the Governor.” Rick finally spoke, tone heavily accusatory. Merle tensed beside me, but before he could retort I spoke instead.

“Come on. I’ll show you around, you can catch me up on everything,”

He allowed me to pull him away, his arm tightening around me as we passed Rick. I guessed that their reunion hadn’t been as happy as ours.

“Officer friendly still a massive prick, jus’ as I remembered,” Merle spoke too soon to be entirely out of earshot, but no-one acknowledged him.

“A massive prick who’s kept us all alive, you mean?”

“I woulda done that if he hadn’t chained me to the roof,”

“I know.” I lead him into my cell, where I sat facing him on my cot. I could tell that immediately, his mind went to what else we could be doing here, but I was determined to hear what had happened before I let him distract me.

“The Governor saved my life ya know. Woulda bled out if it weren’t for him, owe him my life. And this.” he gestured with the blade attached to his arm. “Came across Glenn and Maggie while I was looking for Michonne, couldn’t have her tellin’ no one else ‘bout Woodbury. Took ‘em with me to question on where Daryl was, where you were, but with the Governor everything gets outta hand. Soon as I saw Daryl though I was done with him, helped Officer friendly escape with the others, n here we are,”

I took a moment to process the information. He had kidnapped Glenn and Maggie. Allowed God knows what to happen to them under the command of the Governor, all to find myself and Daryl? I was unsure whether to be flattered or horrified that he would go to such lengths to get us back. In the silence his hand found one of mine, thumb running over the back of it, our fingers interlacing. For once in his life, Merle was willingly vulnerable, and cared about what someone else might think of his actions.

I looked up, eyes meeting his.

“Why?” Glenn and Maggie would likely never forgive him, and I still wasn’t sure if I could.

“Cuz I had to find ya. Ain’t no one out there got an ass like yours,” he smirked at me and I couldn’t help but smile.

“Come on, I’m serious,”

“You know why,” he paused but I stayed silent, goading him to continue talking. “Cuz I love ya, that’s why. And I didn’ know if I could keep going without you.”

That was enough for me, even if he had some serious ass kissing to do for the rest of the group.

“I love you too,” I replied, running my arms up his shoulders to loop around his neck, pulling him close as I bridged the gap between us with a kiss. Immediately he scooped me into his lap, pressing my body close against his. His teeth grazed my lower lip and I gasped lightly at the sensation. It was as if every nerve in my body was on fire as he touched me. I couldn’t believe I’d survived this long without touching him, without kissing him, and now I never wanted to stop. When we finally broke apart, I was breathless, leaning my forehead against his, not yet willing to allow any more distance than that between us. Suddenly, exhaustion washed over me, my lack of sleep the night before finally catching up to my body.

“Nap with me?” I asked. Merle just smiled, briefly kissing me again before detaching the metal from his arm, setting the blade down on the bedside table. It was the first time I had seen his arm without it since he had lost his hand. I knew he would get defensive at any sign of pity from me. I lay down and tugged him down next to me, pulling his arm around me and curling into his body so that we both fit on the narrow cot. I felt him relax against me, arm snug around my waist, other arm around my shoulders, hand tracing my face.

“I missed you,” I finally said to break the silence. “I can’t believe you’re really here,”

“I can’t believe it either,” Merle’s tone was less composed than usual, eyes far more serious. He wanted me to know that he meant what he was saying. “I ain’t ever gonna let you outta my sight again.”

[punemy-spotted]

Dead Trees Like Lavender Fields Chapter 4

Chapter 4: In the Blood of the Lamb

Pairing: Old One!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Rape/Non-Con Elements, Dub-Con, Soft!Dark Characters, Dark! Characters, Cult Elements, Human/Animal Sacrifice, Religious Elements, Blasphemy, Cosmic/Dark Horror, Stalking, Possessive/Obsessive Characters, Appalachian/Mountain Gothic, Gothic Horror, Descriptions of Death and Rot and Poverty, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat

Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3

Chapter Warnings: Non-Con elements, Sexual Harassment, Aggressive Religious Themes, Pentecostal Themes, Murder, Dark Woods and Cosmic Horror, Some Allusions to Abuse, Possessive Language, Sergeant Barnes is Not A Good Man Really

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT YOUR CONSUMPTION OF MEDIA IS YOUR OWN RESPONSIBILITY AND IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE CONTENT THAT IS BEING PRESENTED, PLEASE DO NOT READ

Chapter Summary: This is not your home.

An autopsy of faith, a congregation of corpses, a murder of faithful crows, gathered in the humble lights of cadaverous sanctity, claiming nothing more than the air they rattled through the desiccated woodsheds of their bodies, singing softly that this is not our home.

- Old Gods of Appalachia, Episode 3: The Covenant

Notes: Yes I know this is late and also that I got a lot of other shit to write but I missed writing during the spooky season and Fall is about to turn into Winter so it’s happening now. As always, feedback is appreciated and I will attempt to return to my old self soon.

All of my work is 18+ Only, Minors DO NOT INTERACT. I do not consent to my work being posted anywhere besides Tumblr or Ao3 and I post my work there myself. Do not copy, translate, or repost any of my content.

There are things in the woods deeper and darker than any devil mentioned in Pastor Rogers’s Bible, forces of evil so malignant they would laugh in the face of any God — Christian or otherwise — foolish enough to face them in their own domain.

Eugene Paul Tucker is no God.

Not by any claim of his, no, and most definitely not by any judgment they would cast upon him, them foremen and watchers in the mines or the hootin’ and hollerin’ congregation which descended ‘pon the Tabernacle’s worship hall every Sunday, acting like them hymns could go and cover up the sins of the flesh they partook in when the bells stopped ringin’. No, Eugene Paul Tucker is no God.

If you ask his sister Estus, newly promoted t’matriarch of the Tucker clan since Granny Mabel finally breathed her last, Eugene Paul Tucker was barely a man.

Men, she’d’ve sneered if you asked her, prolly while porin’ over her cannin’ like she always did come harvest time, like a good matriarch ought, Don’t go off an’ lose their fool wives in the woods.

Not a God and barely a man, but deep in the domain of the things in the woods deeper and darker than devil mentioned in Pastor Rogers’s big, bound-leather Bible, alone.

Now, that’s a deadly proposition in itself, bein’ alone in the deep-dark. Granny always warned ‘em, spittin’ tobacco an’ Hellfire while she raved about them bears and adders and lord-only-knows-what, ‘bout them beasts who ripped ‘part her favorite daughter-in-law.

Granny woulda thrown a right conniption fit if she found out Gene’d lost his wife in the same haint-damned woods which took his own momma.

Good thing she was dead.

… not so good for him.

Eliza! Lizzie, girl, c’mon! Ain’t no reason t’go runnin’ off, sweetheart!

The woods crack under his feet, twigs bend and break with each heavy press of his minin’ boots on the thick underbrush, Lizzie! Good God, woman, come on home! Woods ain’t no place for you or the baby!

The baby.

Lord in Heaven above, his baby. What sort of damn fool loses his wife and baby? Wife and baby on the day of her — the baby’s, mind you — own christenin’, t’boot.

Same sort of man who fails to tell his wife just what sort of future lay in front of their new child, the promise of her namin’ was about to carry, the deal he made to make it out alive from the mines.

A life for a life, blood for blood, what you make I will take.

Anything.

Anything to keep the man in the mine’s hands from his throat, t’keep him alive in that deep dark, keep the coal from turnin’ into a catacomb.

We had a deal, the voice behind him is the rumble of an exploding mine, shaking earth and searing screams, molten flesh and soulless husks left to be sobbed over by the wives and babies left behind. Eugene Paul narrowly manages to avoid falling to his knees at the sound, goes still as the stone he’s mined since he was a boy of eight. There will be time to beg later, he tells himself, though he has no idea how much time or how much later he has.

We had a deal, Eugene Paul Tucker, the voice repeats, billowing smoke filling his lungs as his name is called and he turns, slowly, reluctantly, faces the darkness before him and the two glittering embers boring into his soul.

N-now hang on! He protests, facing his accuser, I still — I gotta find her, that’s all. I’ll bring her back, Lizzie’s a good girl. She ain’t been gone for that long, she’ll listen!

It is a lie. Of course it is, and his accuser only laughs, the high metallic ring of pick-ax on stone, of escaped gases meeting an errant spark, You are out of time, Eugene Paul Tucker. You are out of time, and we have come to collect.

And while Eliza-Anne Tucker runs, to be found by the Pennsylvania State Troopers called to investigate the sound of a cryin’-baby-that-definitely-wasn’t-no-goddamn-fox, the only remnants the woods leave of Eugene Paul Tucker are his big leather boots.

Family, we are blessed this day.

Pastor Rogers has a voice like a cave-in, closes around you like it’s trying to choke you, fills your lungs with worship and coal, pours over you with a roar and you swear your very chest aches as he begins to speak from his carved bone-and-antler pulpit.

Family, we are truly blessed this day.

Before you, a man who is secretly a mountain bellows scripture out with the force of a raging forge, salvation seeping in through the gaps in the windows and snaking around a rapt congregation, their voices already raised up in a discordant choir of holy praise and pleading to a Lord who you do not completely believe is actually as merciful as the good Pastor pretends.

Beside you, a coal-and-fire hand rests on your knee, traces the outlines of the polka dots decorating your new Church dress, a present from the Pastor’s own wife, Welcome to the Holler, honeysweet, and you do everything your power has to look at no one. Not him, not the Pastor and his eyes like ice, not Aunt Estus busy corralling her boys or Uncle Cletus glaring from the very back — where he apparently always sat ‘cause he couldn’t last ten minutes without sucking down a cigarette and the Tabernacle had a strict no-smoking rule courtesy of the Women’s Auxiliary’s health campaigns.

Your hands, you decide, currently holding the family Bible which brought you here in the first place, are a much safer thing to look at.

Now, I ask you, family, I ask you — why? A pause as the Pastor surveys his flock, listens to the hum of the Holy Spirit pulse through the room, smug surety on his face as his lips stretch wide into that tombstone smile you almost — almost — recall having seen before, and immediately regret looking up at.

Your momma’s memories may have belonged to her and her alone in life, but death has a way of bringing people together.

At the front of the room, Pastor Rogers continues to boom, Family. Brothers and Sisters in the Lord, we are blessed this day because one of our lambs has returned to us. Our Lamb has returned home. High above you, the rafters echo his voice — home home home hallelujah.

The congregation rises in chorus, a palace of Amen and Hallelujah and Thank you, Lord, built, brick-by-reverent-brick, all around you and you hold back the destructive scream rising in your throat — this is not my home — while your mouth floods with metal and you realize you have bitten your tongue.

Blood for blood.

Family, the Lord is our Savior and our Shepherd. He maketh us lay in green pastures and we thank Him, Family, for the Glory and the Grace, we thank Him for His Love and he thank Him for He has Shepherded our prodigal daughter home. Welcome our daughter back to the flock, won’t you, Family, won’t you say hello?

You could almost drown in it.

Maybe you do, drown in wave after wave of blessings and praise and Hallelujah, Amen all accompanied by the harsh, guttural babbling of what you can only hope is the power of the Holy Ghost descending upon the faithful flock of the Tabernacle of the Holy Trinity, all watched over by the cave-in collapse of Pastor Rogers and his roaring voice, arms outstretched as shadows twist around that bone-and-antler pulpit.

Run.

There are lights in the woods.

You almost don’t notice them at first, stepping out of the Tabernacle’s worship hall as the Sunday Sermon comes to an end and a meal is laid out for the faithful — and the lapsed, you consider, wondering how much they would really welcome you home if your mother hadn’t left the Church the way she did. Almost.

See — just like your momma’s second husband used to tell you when the drink set in and the drill instructor came out — almost only works when you’re playin’ horseshoes and hand grenades. And seeing the green lights in the woods just on the outskirts of town, well, that’s a zero-sum game.

So, standing on the back porch of the Tabernacle of the Holy Trinity while the town of Bell’s Holler buzzes around you with plates and hungry bellies, you see the lights in the woods.

And oh Lord, they see you.

Like lantern lights, swaying faintly in a still breeze, held aloft by invisible hands. A path of phosphorescent mystery and calling voices, beckoning you into the yawning mouth of the inevitable.

Right down the path your momma took, straight into them shadow trees, the hungry embrace of something greedy and unknowable, waiting. Waiting for you to come back home, back to where you belong.

Your throat aches. The collar tugs.

You runnin’ off already, kitten? Sergeant Barnes’s voice is ash and honey, flowing into your senses and tearing you away from the freedom just beyond that copse of trees at the edge of town.

You turn. Too quick, too hurried, too startled, too stupid to realize how close you are to the edge of the porch until that coal-and-fire hand you’ve seen in your nightmares dreams is wrapped around your wrist and dragging you away from a backbreaking tumble, right into the hard wall of the Sergeant’s chest and too close to him from any comfort you might draw from the impromptu rescue.

S’I said — you runnin’ off already, kitten? Somethin’ in the woods catch your eye?

You may not have been smart enough to heed your momma when she told you to never come to these haint-damned woods but you are clever enough to know when to hold your tongue — telling the good Sergeant anything about the lights in the woods would just get back to your Aunt Estus and she was already so adamant on outstaying your vacation here at the Holler. That was your route out, you could feel it in your bones. As long as you timed it right.

You startled me, you accuse instead, breezing past his own suspicion with another bright, marketing manager smile, peeling yourself from his chest and standing on your own — further away from the edge this time.

Just in case.

Coal-dark eyes train on you as you pull away, moving faster than you expected you would after being caught by him but not trapped by him. Not yet, at the very least.

Instead, all the good Sergeant does is smile. Thinkin’ ‘bout runnin into those woods like your momma did? You sure we’ll let you go this time, sweetheart?

Excuse me?

The pitch of your voice rises, not the soft thing you were raised to be — your momma couldn’t put the fire in you out, nor did she ever really want to, ‘cept when it came to you tryin’ to burn your way out of her clutches — but the good Sergeant before you barely reacts except to expand his smirk… and stalk closer to you.

Think we didn’t learn our lesson from Eliza runnin’ off into the woods, sweetheart? Don’t be silly.

I don’t know what you’re talking about, you lie, you lie you lie you lie, still stepping back, avoiding his eye, avoiding his grip, avoiding his accusations.

Tellin’ lies ain’t your thing, sweetheart.

I told you, I don’t know what you’re talking about, I—

He cuts you off, fingers cold on your cheek as he takes hold of your jaw and pushes you back, trapped between the hate-cold of his eyes and the hard-brick of the house of the Lord, Always on the run, aren’t you kitten? How far do you think you’ll go before I catch you, huh? Wanna test it out? Could even give you a head start, if you ask nice, sweetheart.

Your teeth ache from the pressure, grit and grinding, fingers curled against unyielding metal and you mirror his hate, trying to pry him away, Let… let me go—

You think I’m gonna let you get away so quickly? I’ve been waiting a lo—

Sergeant Barnes, there you are!

Ma Rogers is just like you remember from your first morning here, sweet orange and sunshine, sauntering her way across the back lawn of the Tabernacle. Comfortable in her gravidity, swollen with the pride of a new generation growing in her belly, a queen in her own right commanding the Kingdom of the Lord, James Buchanan Barnes, I been lookin’ for you all over God’s creation an’ here you are, harassin’ our guest, where are your manners? Pastor’s been hollerin’ for you, so go on, git!

Cool air washes over you and fills your lungs, replacing smoke and fire with the warm spring of honeysuckle and fresh rain as the grip on your jaw is released and Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes turns around, looks properly abashed at the sound of the matriarch of Bell’s Holler’s ire and you know in your bones that this is not a woman to be trifled with.

A woman you are grateful for more than you can name in this moment, as she makes her steady way up the porch and points a slender finger that does not look as work wizened as you know they are, having seen her wrist-deep in her garden plenty of times since your arrival to town, since the first time you spent sipping tea and nibbling bites of apple cake in her parlor while the Pastor and the Foreman went about whatever business it was a Pastor and a Foreman needed to do in the dark edges of town. Now don’t let me catch you causin’ trouble again, James Buchanan Barnes, I know you been raised better than that.

You almost expect her tirade to last longer, shrill and rapid enough to give the Sergeant — looking less like a leader of men and more like a boy bein’ scolded by his granny — no room to interject, defend himself, stop her verbal lashing, but it ends just as soon as it begins, this time with the Sergeant slinking off into the crowd to deal with whatever it was the Pastor needed him for.

Whatever it is, you do not — and cannot bring yourself to — care. Senses fixated on the sanctuary of your savior’s presence, rescued a second time and just as grateful and shocked by it, you just lean yourself against the hard brick and breathe, steadying the race of your heart and trying to find the strength in you to smile. Thank you, managed a little hesitantly, still watching the Sergeant’s retreating back until he was gone into the crowd.

Don’t you fret, honey, Ma Rogers sets down the basket she’d been carrying against her hip, full up of canned vegetables she’d brought from her stores to share with the… less fortunate members of town, as the Virtue of Charity demanded of all citizens of the Holler with the means to do so, That no-good fool of a Foreman’s bark’s worse than his bite. I’ll make sure the Pastor sets him right — Lord knows he ought to know better than start his antics up on a Sunday.

She rambles slightly, hands on her hips and glancing back like she too might be making sure the Sergeant knew he’d been beat, just for now, If it wasn’t the Lord’s day itself, I’d’ve tanned his hide — but that’s neither here nor there, c’mere, honey, lemme get a look at you. Did he hurt you any?

Your jaw feels bruised and still, you just shake your head, offering as quick a smile as you can manage, No ma’am, thank you. Just startled me.

The tut of her tongue is disbelief, but dismissal all the same, No use pressing, is the unspoken agreement between the both of you, and you… accept that.

No use pressing.

Somewhere below, a cry goes up from the crowd, a call from one of the Rogers’s girls to come fill empty plates and sate hungry bellies and before you can ask any more questions, Ma Rogers beckons you forth, Let’s get a meal in you, honey, afore you start lookin’ as you might keel over again.

And as you follow her down the porch steps over to the banquet set before you, you forget about the yawning mouth of the unknown and the path wound through the green, calling you into the darkness of the inevitable.

It does not forget you.

[wildlcck]

━━━🥀━━━

❛ but, you're a damn kid! surely, you can be forgiven for a little foolishness here an' there. hell, those that are grown act fool most every day- what's their excuse? ❜ then again, her pride in climbing the tallest tree or eating the most bugs on a dare when she was a girl wasn't exactly shared by her folks. ❛ best place for it. 's funny- my daddy kept that ol' thing lyin' around. i used to fool around pretendin' it was a gun. but, he never did pick it back up, or use it. he had his own ways, mind you... of keepin' us on the straight an' narrow. ❜ he'd take a certain kind of tone or look, fashion weapons out of the raising of his voice or hand instead. and, well, that felt just like staring down the barrel of a rifle scarier, sometimes ❛ but, the only thing gettin' a whack taught me is to wanna whack back, even harder. this one time- well, it sure wa'n't the first or the last- my momma slapped me in the face for my troubles. so, i slapped her right back. i suffered for that one, all right. the woman never spoke a word to me, for weeks. it felt like years. i begged and i pleaded, i wailed an' hollered... nothin'. i woulda taken a hundred knocks over that quiet of hers. ❜ always seemed to hurt more, somehow. ❛ he's sweet enough, ma bob. maybe a little too sweet- that horse couldn't say boo to a darn goose! not if his life depended on it. or, mine. ❜ ❛ missus. was. still is, i guess. just... minus my mister now. ❜ one last long, measured draught from the bottle, after a second or so of deliberation, with a sad sort of half smile. half there, half not. wound forgotten momentarily in the face of this other, deeper cut. ❛ he was a good man, my husband. he had a good heart- a kind one, like yours. he was always helpin' folks, or tryin' to. folks who'd sooner spit in yer eye than thank ya. animals, too. i was always askin' him why in the hell he bothered. and every time, he'd just smile and say why the hell not? ❜ ❛ now, how you gon'- ❜ she starts advising to pay attention. but, she stops just as quick, with a sigh. sure, she might have learned to suture, along with some other painful vital lessons. but, there were times when she'd rather have been allowed to watch the birds and pretend it was her up there in the air instead. just, sometimes. ❛ go right ahead, kid. y' know, when i was a girl, i wanted nothin' more than to be a bird. i always wanted to fly, just like them. it was all i talked about, at one time. my momma and daddy, well, they thought i'd lost ma damn mind. anyway, i used to get so mad. 'cause they could go anywhere they damn well pleased. and we're stuck right here on the ground. guess i still am... just a little. ❜

❛ you're a real charmer, ain't you, kid? ❜ she has a good chuckle at that. but, it's not long before another frown creases and clouds her brow. because, ❛ lord knows i'm frightenin' enough. but, there's bigger an' badder out there than me, if you can believe it. you be careful with that kindness o' yours- folks are in the habit of mistakin' a kind heart for a weak one. ❜ then again, if everyone in this world was too weak or scared as to show a little kindness to folks in need, god knows what or where she'd be now. ❛ the mayor, huh? what's it like, bein' some big-wig's son? ❜ she's heard talk of their making inroads in the mayor's town- inroads, most likely meaning they're fixing to rob him and this town of his blind. she hasn't paid all that much attention, though: there's only one name she's concerned with these days. the same one that haunts her waking hours and fitful sleep. but, the thought of this boy with the kind heart getting caught up in all that... she pushes the idea from her mind- for now. ❛ you got that right. it is no easy task, keepin' outta trouble. 'specially when it's got a way of findin' ya. ❜ ❛ my papaw had one just like it. but, that thing never so much as touched the dirt when he walked! nah, mostly, he used it to keep my daddy an' his brothers in check. a whackin' stick's, what they called it. what's your mary like? she sour? or sweet? i tell ya, you'd be hard pushed t' find better company than a horse. they don't talk back, for one. ❜ ❛ i do wish it were under better circumstances. but, it sure is nice t' make your acquaintance, orel. i'm sadie. sadie ad- ler... ❜ it feels strange, now. where once it felt certain. like hers. she takes the needle, threading it deftly. it hovers above the start of her wound. another draught for good measure (and luck). ❛ well, ain't no time like the present. i hope you got a strong stomach on ya, kid. you'd best steel yourself- this ain't gon' be pretty. ❜

[wonderwomanfantasy]

Stress relief

mind your bisnuess I’m working through some shit 

Atsumu x reader

warnings: smut, just- so much smut, Oral, car sex, fingering, Daddy kink, degradation, marking, ass play, dirty talk,Brat taming, slut shaming AND virgin shaming (we got it all folks), hair pulling, cum play, creampie, breading kink, drinking/ Drunk sex, angst annnnnd swearing. 

word count: 4,800 (about) (yes really get off my back)

summary: Atsumu is a dick, but he’s got a good dick at least you have no idea how mad I am I’ve already used the title Enemy with Benifits. 

“Are- Are you fucking kidding me?” you asked, Atsumu just shrugged. 

“No, I’m not fucking kidding you what’s your deal?” he said casually. You took a deep breath. You had been trying to work on your anger issues, Not blowing up on people over nothing. But this really felt like something worth blowing up over. 

“Myia, be honest with me, do you think I’m stupid?” you asked. He smirked.

“I think you’re a lot of things babe-” you stood up getting in his face jabbing your finger in his chest cutting off his no doubt horrendous flirting. 

“You fucking ripped off you’re entire part of the project! How the fuck did you think no one would notice?” you shouted. You had known this was going to be a train wreck the moment Atsumu was assigned as your partner. He was such a fucking moron, he’d only gotten into this College because of his sports scholarship. You would have been better working on your own.

“I cited the article I copied, what's the deal?” he snapped, the volume of your voice irking him. 

“That’s not how this fucking works you can’t just hit copy-paste and call it a day the point is you come up with your own ideas, although in your defense I’m not sure you’re brain could manage something like that,” you shouted. He sneared. 

“I’ll rewrite it just stop being a bitch alright?” he scoffed, turning to leave your dorm room. You wanted to hit him, how dare he call you a bitch when you were just looking out for his dumb ass. Even high schoolers knew you’d be expelled for plagiarising. Once Atsumu left you slumped back in your seat looking at the presentation open on your laptop. You were already so busy but somehow you’d have to find enough time to do half of the project unless you wanted to fail that was.

“Hey, you’re working with (y/n) on your project right?” Osamu asked, setting his volleyball up in the air over and over again. 

“Yeah, they totally blew up on me today so now I gotta redo the whole thing,” Atsumu sighed 

“They’re hot though,” his brother said. Atsumu smiled to himself, remembering your angry face as you chewed him out.

“Really hot,” he agreed. 

“Are you gonna fuck them?” 

“Of course, they might an asshole but they want me,”

“Hey (y/n),” you looked up at the sound of your name only to groan seeing Atsumu run towards you. He had clearly just come from practice, he was still in his jersey. Fucking jocks. 

He probably thought he looked hot, with a light sheen of sweat that made his skin glow and tousled hair. He did look hot, it made you want to kick his shins. 

“If you aren’t going to tell me that you finished your half of the presentation I don’t want to hear it,” you snapped.

“Well then you aren’t going to be happy then but there’s a game this weekend, you should come, cheer for me,” he said winking. You rolled your eyes. 

“I was already planning on going, but you’re nuts if you think I’m gonna cheer for you,” you snapped, still a little heated about your last encounter with him. 

“And why not?” he asked, smirking, it pissed you off. You just knew he thought he looked so cute smiling at you like that. 

“I cheer for winners,”

You and Atsumu were at each other’s throats for the rest of the year. Atsumu Gave up on his plan to sleep with you and you gave up on your anger management, at least around him. If other people were in this situation they might stay away from their sworn enemy, but not you two. 

You made it to every volleyball game just to tell Osamu how great he did and how handsome he was looking today. Atsumu sat next to you in every class you shared talking your ear off making sure that you didn’t learn a damn thing. 

It was annoying as hell, you wanted to strangle him, but it was nice in a kind of way. If you were stressed or pissed off you could drag Atsumu as a little fun. And even if nothing else in your life was going right. You could always count on this blonde dick to be the worst to you. 

“Damn we had the exterminator here last week but there’s a roach right here,” Atsumu sneered over the thumping music at the party. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. 

“You need to look up more insults you’ve already used that one,” you barked back, normally seeing Atsumu would be enough to dampen your mood but the booze must have been doing its job because you still felt all light and buzzed. 

“Beer?” he asked, holding up a bottle for you, ever the gracious host. 

“I’m good,” you said holding up the can of seltzer you’d been drinking out of it was fruity and only had a little bite to it, you were already on your third one. 

“Right I forgot that a baby like you couldn’t handle the taste of beer,” he scoffed, he was closer now, towering over you and pressing one of his forearms to the wall by your head as he leaned over you, shielding you from the rest of the party. You never realized before how big he was. Tall and wide. Muscular too, it was no wonder half the people at the Volleyball games creamed themselves just seeing him. 

“You’re such a dick, why do you always have to be so mean?” you asked before even realizing the words that you’d spoken.

“You aren’t exactly nice either princess, besides that’s how this works, that’s our dynamic,” he said. He must be pretty drunk too. Nothing he was saying was making any sense. 

“Still, how do you expect anyone to put up with you when you’re such a douche bag all the time?” you said the anger you associated with Atsumu finally setting in. 

“If it works it works, I mean you’re obsessed with me,” he said. You gagged and shoved his chest, he didn’t move, god how strong was he?

“Fuck off I hate you, why would I be obsessed with you? God you think that the world fucking revolves around you. How could any-”

His lips met yours effectively shutting you up. His hand came up cupping the back of your head and you couldn’t help but melt into the kiss, pressing your body against his and dropping your drink so your hands would be free to rake through his hair. You weren’t nice about the kiss either, your teeth gnashed against his when he tried to push his tongue into your mouth. You bit his lower lip and tugged at his hair, moaning against his mouth when he did the same to you. 

He broke away breathlessly, still holding you close to his body while you caught your breath. He was so pretty his cheeks flushed his lips wet and glossy. God, you wanted to kiss him again, even if he tasted like beer and he had been right in his assessment that you weren’t a big fan of the taste. 

“Good to know theirs one way to shut you the fuck up,” he teased. You groaned in frustration pulling him back down into another kiss. This one was just as passionate and fierce as the first. He pushed you against the wall and pulled up one of your legs and forced it around his waist so he could grind against you. You shuddered feeling him rut the seam of your jeans against your clit. 

“Woulda fucked you a lot sooner if i'd known you made such pretty noises when you were touched,” he muttered reaching up and palming your breast through your shirt. Atsumu started kissing, or maybe biting was a better word. The top part of your neck even pays some attention to your jaw and earlobe while he humped and groped you. 

“I knew you were a pervert but I never knew you were filthy enough to fuck me out in the open like this,” you gasped, tugging at his hair. You could feel your panties get sticky with your arousal and you wanted him to take you out of here and fuck you already. 

“You’re gonna let me fuck you?” he asked, pulling back so he could look at you and smirk. You smiled back, the fight wasn’t out of you yet. 

“Why would I do that? I’d rather sleep with someone who could make me cum,” you spat and his grin quickly fell, there was a competitive fire in his eyes that you normally only saw when he was playing.

“Oh Daddy’s gonna make you cum you fucking brat, I’ll make you squirt, you’re gonna cry with how good my dick feels,” he growled in a low voice you’d never heard before and suddenly you were regretting your comment. 

“Daddy?” you snorted

Atsumu detangled himself from you and grabbed you by the wrist tugging you out of the frat house and to his car. You shook your head and broke free of his iron-clad grasp. 

“I know you’re stupid but this is a new low, both of us are way too drunk to drive,” you shouted. Atsumu just laughed at you, opening the back door to his car. 

“We aren’t driving dumbass now get in,” he said. You bit your lip and slid into the back seat shortly followed by Atsumu who locked the door behind him. 

The seat wasn’t large but it was big enough to move around in. He pressed you onto the leather upholstery, your legs bent and splayed out at an awkward angle to fit him between them. He went back to kissing you sloppily while his hands went to work taking off your shirt and bra. 

Your nipples hardened once the cold night air touched you. “Wanted to suck on your pretty tits for the longest time,” he groaned quickly lowering his head, sucking one of your nipples into his mouth while he fingered the other twisting and pinching it. You yelped when his teeth grazed over the bud. His eyes flicked up to yours and he let go of the spit-soaked nipple blowing on it lightly making you shiver. 

“How long has it been since you’ve been fucked huh? So many guys want to fuck this sweet little pussy but you’re too stuck up to let that happen.” he snears sucking the other nipple into his mouth. 

“Bet you’re still a fucking virgin,” he said speaking around your mouth. 

“ I a-am not,” you whined, you’d lost your virginity in high school, but you really hadn’t gotten fucked since then. 

“Oh listen to you whine you totally are,” he scoffed 

“No I’m Not!” you protested he let go of your nipple and kissed you again threading his fingers through your hair and pressing your face to his. 

“Shut up you fucking virgin,” he said sweetly, before pulling off his shirt, and before you could admire his chiseled chest he distracted you by biting your neck again. You pressed your hand to the center console to keep from slipping off with one hand and clinging to his shoulders with the other. 

Atsumu deftly unbuttoned your jeans and shoved his hands in your pants touching your through your soaked underwear. You felt him smirk against your neck but he didn’t make any remark about it. Good thing for him too because you could feel his hard prick pressing up against your thigh and you were ready to drag him for it if he commented on your own arousal. 

God, you could feel his cock. It was big, heavy, and hard, pressed against your leg. You wanted to see it, touch it, feel it inside of you. He’d pushed your panties to the side now so he could push his large fingers inside brushing against your velvet walls. 

“A-Atsumu,” you said, pitching your leg up to rub against his dick.  “I want to suck your cock,” you whimpered. You felt him twitch. 

“Here I thought you were a virgin but you’re just a slutty whore aren't cha?” he growled against your neck picking your hips up and yanking your pants down your legs leaving them pooled around your ankles leaving you to kick your jeans off completely. You felt a little stupid naked except for your shoes but Atsumu quickly distracted you by folding you in half pressing your knees to your chest and leaving your pussy completely exposed. 

“I’ll fuck your throat later, right now I gotta make you cum remember?” he said playing his hands over your thighs keeping g you folded before lowering his head and diving into your folds like a man starved. 

Just like he kissed you, he was mean about it, sucking so harshly that you cried out and spanking your cunt just to make you jump. The only time he pulled back was to spit on your asshole lubing it up enough to slip a finger inside. 

“Sumu please,” you cried out as he filled you with his tongue pressing against your G-spot over and over again while he pinched your clit. You weren’t even sure what you were begging for. He just hummed in acknowledgment, whatever you were begging for he wasn’t going to have it. 

“Daddy,” you pleaded, finally caving. Atsumu smiled to himself. He wasn’t nice but he did reward good behavior. 

He switched it up sucking your clit into your mouth and plunging the fingers of his clean hand, the one that hadn’t just been your ass, inside of you curling up and pressing against your g-pot over and over again until you came screaming so loud that you were sure people back at the house could hear you. 

“See didn’t that feel good slut?” he cooed condescendingly. There was a pool of cum beneath you soaking into the leather seats. Good thing this was Osamus’s car. Now all he had to do was make you cry. 

“I-I’m not a slut,” you whined. 

“Oh? Which is it? Are you not a virgin or are you not a slut?” he asked, squeezing your cheeks. You didn’t know how to respond. 

“Well I think you’re a slut, Daddy’s little slut,” he snapped. 

There was a dark stain of precum staining his jeans where the head of his cock was leaking he quickly shoved down his pants and boxers before sitting down and pulling you into his lap. You hovered above him as he pumped his cock in his hand running the head of his cock through your soaked folds and bumping your clit. 

“You’re gonna be a good whore and ride Daddy’s cock right?” he asked, lining the head of his dick up with your entrance. You bit your lip and nodded, shakily lowering yourself down on him. Atsumu hissed feeling your tight heat wrap around him. 

You gripped his shoulders feeling how well he filled you up, the tip pressing against your cervix. You took a minute to adjust before lifting yourself up on your knees and started to fuck yourself onto him. 

Atsumu brought you close and kissed you again, one of his hands slipping between your bodies to stroke your clit while you bounced up and down on his cock.  You couldn’t help but moan into his mouth as he touched you. He filled you up so well, you had teased him about not being able to get you off but even you couldn’t deny how good it felt to have him so deep inside of you. 

“You feel that baby? You feel Daddy pressing up against your Cervix, I’m going to blow my fat load right into your slutty little womb,” he snarled his hips snapping up to meet yours. You whined, throwing your head back in pleasure, almost hitting your head on the headrest. 

“Gonna knock you up, gonna stuff this slutty pussy with cum,” he growled, he was talking more to himself but you couldn’t help but shudder at his words. You were on birth control but you desperately wanted him to fill you up. 

“Are you gonna cum princess?” He asked, “I can feel your cunt squeezing my cock like that, you’re gonna cum.” He was right, you could feel a second orgasm welling up in your core as his cock pulsed inside of you. 

“Atsumu-Daddy, I’m gonna cum,” you moaned kissing him sloppily, your hips faltered when you came but Atsumu’s hands went to your hips moving your body for you as he chased his own high, true to his word he came deep inside of you filling you up and pressing his cock against your cervix. 

You collapsed against his chest gasping for breath. He ran his hand soothingly over your back. 

“You look tired, you wanna crash somewhere babe?” he asked. 

“We’re still too drunk to drive,” you murmured. 

“I have a buddy in the frat house, I’m sure he’ll let me steal his bed for the night, especially for a cutie like you,” he said. You pulled back to look at him.

“You had a bed here this whole time and you still made me fuck you in the car?” 

When you woke up your whole body hurt. Your head ached your eyes stung and your body was littered with bruises. You didn’t even want to check in with the lower half of your body. You groaned sitting up in bed clutching your head. Then you felt the bed beside you shift, you froze remembering how you’d ended last night. 

Atsumu cracked one eye open and his face split into a huge grin. “I had the best dream last night-” he teased you and moved to hit him but he caught your wrist and flipped you on your back pinning you to the bed. 

He hovered above you his breath hitting your face in soft puffs. You leaned up and kissed him, suddenly you were a mess of limbs and hands trying to tear each other’s clothes off while you kissed. You hissed as his fingers grazed the bite marks on your neck. 

“Go easy on me I’m still sore,” you complained. Atsumu smirked.

“Did I wreck you that badly baby?” he asked, teasingly grinding his morning wood on your leg. You shuddered. 

“Shut up and fuck me asshole,” you demand. He tugged off your underwear and hooked your legs over his shoulders. 

“As you wish your majesty,” he scoffed and slowly pushed two of his fingers into you

Your cunt ached and it hurt to feel his fingers prod you open, but soon the pain dissolved into pleasure as he continued to finger you. 

“Such a pretty wet little cunt, so wet and sticky for me,” he purred, “you like this slut? You like getting fingered first thing in the morning?” he asked. 

“Do you like humping my ass like a fucking dog first thing in the morning?” you spat back. He grunted and roughly jerked his finger up hitting your G-spot making you cry out your back arching off the bed. 

“That’s what I thought,” he scoffed before completely pulling his fingers out and sticking them into his mouth sucking on your juices. 

“I’m not gonna fuck you if you keep being mean,” he said shoving down his own clothes 

“Shut up, I bet I’m the only one you know who lets you get your dick wet,” you growled. He snapped into you in one swift motion. You cried out your nails digging into his shoulders. It hurt but the pain sent a rush of endorphins making you moan. 

“Really you think that I could fuck you like this without any practice dollface? Don’t forget you’re the virgin here,” he teased drawing his hips back before ramming back into you. This pace was much harsher than what you’d set last night. You were helpless, and entirely at his mercy, he had you folded in half, and you could only moan and scratch at his back. 

“Imna fill this cunt with cum, nothing better than emptying my balls in your warm cunt first thing in the morning,” he muttered to himself as he continued to fuck you. 

“Already?” you teased.

“Fuck off or I’ll fuck you until you pass out,” he threatened. 

“Hurry up and make me cum, I’ve got shit to do today,” you snapped. 

“God do you ever stop being a bitch?” he asked, pulling out of you and flipping you over, jerking your hips up and sliding back into you. you moaned feeling his cock hit new sweet spots. You arched your back pressing your hips to his and burying your face into the pillows. 

The bed creaked with the force of his thrusts, the headboard hitting the wall with a loud bang. Atsumu brought his hand down on your ass making you jump, it stung and you were reminded of his killer serves that you had seen so many times. 

“There, no more bitchy comebacks? Have you gone braindead on my cock?” he mocked spanking you again. 

“Daddy!” you pleaded. Your thighs trembling as wetness dripped down your legs. 

“Awe theirs my sweet little slut, ready to be good now?” 

���Y-yes,” you whined desperate to cum.  Atsumu grunted and finally went easy on you, rubbing your clit and easing into you in slow, deep thrusts until he felt your pussy cream around him. 

“There you go baby,” he said pulling out of you, his hard cock dripping in your juices. “You still want to suck on my cock?” he asked. You bit your lower lip, embarrassed at the memory. You shifted on the bed settling in between his legs taking the head of his cock into your mouth and wrapping your hands around the rest of his dick. 

You licked softly at the slit in the head picking up the bitter precum with your tongue.  You slowly took more of his cock in your mouth hollowing your cheeks out around him. His dick was just too big for you to fit completely into your mouth so you moved your hands up and down his shaft while you took as much of him as you could, swirling your tongue around the head. 

“You’re doing so well baby,” he moaned, smoothing your hair back from your face. “I didn’t think a virgin like you’d be so good,” he teased. You glared up at him as you continued to suck his dick but you resolved to bite him if he made a comment like that again. 

“I think I like you better like this you’re so pretty when you shut the- OW watch the teeth,” 

You could taste it as the precum dribbled out of his cock smearing over your tongue, you were getting used to the bitter taste and it wasn’t that bad. You pushed your head down pressing his cock to the back of your throat suppressing your gag reflex. 

“Fuck, baby just like that i’m going to cum down your thoat,” he groaned his hips stuttering upwards pushing his dick down your throat deaper making you choke. Atsumu didn’t care,he was moaning loudly as his hips spasmed up into your mouth. 

You choked when his semen flooded your mouth. “Fuuck,” he sighed, pulling out of your mouth. You sluptered trying to catch the mess that bubbled out of your mouth. 

“Ah, swallow what you can baby,” Atsumu said, whipping your chin with his thumb. You did as he asked, choking down what you could. He pushed you back on the bed kissing your neck, his lips running over your bruises, 

“I like you like this, we should fuck more often he teased,” you shoved his chest, but weakly, it was clearly just for show. You didn’t want to admit it but you agreed with him. 

You kept seeing Atsumu after that. He was a little nicer with you normally. Or at least, he saved his mean side for the bedroom and was a little sweeter to you. If you were a little more naive you might have even started to fall for him a little bit. 

That was the Chliche right? You start out hating someone but then after a few nights of passion you were in love?  Bullshit, it was all Bullshit. 

you knew Atsumu hadn’t changed, and he wasn’t exactly saving himself for you. You couldn’t count how many times you’d walked in on him making out with some random chick, you’d even walked in on him while he’d been balls deep in some other girl. 

That being said, you hadn’t changed either. you still had a temper like no other and were quick to snap, especially at Atsumu. You didn’t have many friends who put up with your bullshit so why would He even fall in love with you?

You shouldn’t be in love with him. He was an asshole, a heartless fuck boy. So why did you like him so much? why did it sting when you thought about how hopless your whole situation. 

It sucked, this whole thing was just awful. That being said, you still jumped at the chance to see him everytime he called, you really were hopless. 

“Where are we going?” you asked as Atsumu drove. You didn’t recognize this street and you knew you weren’t going to his place. 

“It’s a surprise,” he said. You scoffed and crossed your arms. He pulled into a parking lot and you were surprised to see you were at a park. 

“What are you going to fuck me on the slide?” you asked, following him out of the car and into the park. 

“I used to come here all the time when I was a kid, me and my brother would play here,” he said, ignoring you and walking to the swings, you followed. 

“And I still come here a lot, it’s a good place to think and it’s just a really special place for me,” he said sitting on the swing and gesturing for you to sit on his lap. 

You did, wrapping your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. “I don’t like where this conversation is going,” you said furrowing your eyebrows. It was almost the middle of the night so it was dark but you could still see the dopey lovestruck look on his face. 

“Stumu, you’re not supposed to call me for stuff like this,” you said unwrapping your arms around his neck, you were going to get off his lap but he wrapped his arms around his waist keeping you there. 

The two of you had agreed only to call each other when you wanted sex, this mushy romantic shit was defently not sex. 

“You’re so pretty baby, let me be nice to you,” he said kissing you and you melted into him, just like every time he kissed you. 

“You’re never nice to me,” you protested. He reached under your shirt groping you. 

“Because you never let me,” he protested. 

“What’s with you?” you asked, grabbing his wrist and shoving him away from you. 

“I love you,” he said. You couldn’t deal with this right now, you got off his lap and started walking back to the car

“Take me home,” you demanded.  “I don’t want to talk about this,” you said. 

“(y/n)-” he said running in front of you stopping you. 

“Please, I know you hate this shit, but please can we talk,” he pleaded taking your hands in his, 

“You can’t just say shit like that Tsumu! We’re not supposed to love each other we’re supposed to fuck and get under eachother’s skin and fight that’s how this works!” you shouted.

Atsumu kissed your knuckles, seeming to ignore your yelling. 

“We didn’t used to fuck either, we used to just get under eachother’s skin,” he pointed out. He wrapped you in his arms. You pressed your face to his chest and you felt your cheeks get wet with tears. You hiccupped and sobbed,  trying to keep your emotions bottled up was hard.  

“I love you,” he said again.  You shoved him and whipped your face. 

“I don’t want to do this Atsumu, take me home,” you demanded. He deflated. 

“Okay baby, let's go home, I’ll be waiting, when you’re ready,” he said rubbing your shoulders and taking you back to his car. 

You drove in silence. You hated this. Yout hated him. Atsumu was a playboy, an idiot and an asshole who only cared about Volleyball. You just wanted to insult him and fuck him to blow off steam. You weren’t supposed to fall for him. You weren’t supposed to love his cocky smile and his stupid jokes. His stupid flirty remarks weren’t supposed to make you blush. 

“Baby?” he prompted you blinked and saw you were sitting in front of your dorm building. “Hey,” he purred, wiping the tears off your cheeks. You didn’t need him to tell you that he loved you, you could tell every time  he did something like this. You couldn’t help but lean into his touch. 

“I really wished we’d had sex tonight,” you whispered. He laughed. 

“fuck am I really that ireaistable doll?” he teased, pinching your cheek as he pulled away. 

“I do love you Atsumu, I just- I just don’t know what to do about it,” you admitted. Atsumu smiled lazily. 

you meant it too, you loved him so much. but it was impossible to get the image of the time you walked in on him sleeping with another girl out of your mind. Was that what it meant to be in a relationship with him? If so then you weren’t going to do it, you weren’t signing yourself up for that kind of heartbreak. Maybe you should just give up on him and block him. 

“Like I said. I’ll wait for you, and next time I promise we’ll have the best sex of your life-Not that’s a hard bar to clear you virigin,” he teased. You smiled and playfully hit him in the arm. You got out of his car and walked into your building as he drove away, and at least for tonight. That was enough. 

[hermankopusortizorsumshite]

Grady's Homecoming

“Grady! You always talk about bein’ fucked. Fuckin’ all ‘ese German women, you got a woman waitin’ for you?” Bible’s voice crackles through the headset.

Grady’s mind travels to you. You were at home in Arkansas, probably keeping the farm afloat while he fought for your safety. He played the ladies’ man role well these days, because he never wanted anyone to know about you; to hurt you.

“Grady Paul Travis! Git over here!” you shouted as you chased him through the yard. He remembered this memory well; you chasing him around with a wooden spoon in your hand.

“That’s a mighty fine pie, ma’am!” He shouted to egg you on, begging you to keep chasing him. His path lead you through the yard, over a couple fences into muddy, sloppy pens and finally into the barn where he hid from you.

“Grady, hunny, come on out. I ain’t gonna hurt ya.” You called, looking over the hay bales. He had watched you creep through that barn with that spoon at the ready. When he finally could land, he dropped from the hay loft and rolled you into a straw bale. You screeched and smacked his back with that wooden spoon, but he just roared with laughter.

“You make the best pecan pies, my beautiful lady. You also make the best wife.” He smiled, kissed your cheek with a loving smile.

“Yer damn right I do, Grady Paul Travis. You had to stick your grubby little paws into my pie.” You had hissed, letting him pepper your face with kisses as he rolled to keep you from being stabbed with straw. “Hunny? I love you.” You drawled, putting down the spoon on the bench and laying across his body fully.

“I love you too, baby.” He cooed, kissing your face and hugging you against him as his lips got lost with yours on a grand adventure that lead to his dirty, oil covered hands sliding up into your work gown and massaging your breasts. You careened into him and gripped his curls tight in your fists.

“Grady! Grady get down! Jesus christ!” Bible’s voice brings back from his daydream and he ducks hard into the tank.

“Grady are you with us now?” Don shouts, grabbing his coat collar.

“Ye-yeah. Yeah sorry.” He coughs, tears almost spilling over his cheeks.

“Grady, you okay buddy?” Norman calls, looking up at the Coon-Ass with a sad, sorry look in his eyes.

“Yeah, I’m fine, dammit.” He barks, scrubbing away the tears.

Once they get into the crossroads, Grady and Norman head into the building near there and search for parts.

“Grady, listen. Whatever happened back there--” he grabs Norman around the neck and drives him against the wall.

“Nothing happened.” He spits through his clenched teeth. Raising his hands up, Grady lets go and heads to keep looking. “I do got a lady back home. I try not to think about her because she fucks me up. But yeah, she’s my world. I’m sorry you lost your German girl back there, I really am. If I could 'a saved her I woulda. But I couldn’t.” He offers, toeing at the dirt.

“Thanks Grady.” He huffs, deflating the breath he’d been holding.

“Don’t thanks me. I ain’t do nothin’.” He shakes his head as he turns and starts out the door.

After the dust and blood settled, troops came to the Fury team’s rescue. Not single Fury member was dead, wounded, yes. But dead? No. It was a miracle and Bible babbled about it the whole way back as the troopers told them they were heroes. Grady didn’t care to feel like a hero, he hurt and he was ready to see his lady. It’d been a long four years, a few letters, but a long time since he’d seen your face.

“You guys are gettin’ patched up and sent home. You can’t fight in the shape you’re in.” The man had said. Tears filled Grady’s eyes then, as he knew he’d get to see you.

“A broke wing and pure heart, Mister Ass, you get to go home and find you some American ass, aye?” Don cheers, and Grady just nods, giving a wave to him.

“I’mma go home an’ kiss my woman hard and fuck ‘er hard too.” The three men from the Fury, Don, Bible, and Gordo, all looked to Grady with wide eyes.

“Your woman?” Bible asks, looking to his best friend with shock.

“Yeah. I’m a taken man, Boyd.” He chuckles, patting the man on the knee.

“So all this talk about fuckin’ these German women, and you never fucked one did ya?” He asks, punching him in the shoulder. Grady only shakes his head.

The men board the air carrier that flew them into the depths hell and they all hoop and holler as they lift into the air.

“They say the war’s all but done anymore. You boys did a hell of a job out there.” The pilot talks over the intercom as they fly over open water.

“I can’t wait to take a fuckin’ shower.”

“I can’t wait to sleep in a bed.”

“I can’t wait to find me a woman.”

“I can’t wait to see my woman.”

Each man had a different dream, but all the same, they all were excited to go home.

“Wardaddy, Gordo, Coon-Ass, War Machine, I never wanna hear those names again.” Bible cheers as the plane gets close to landing. Women, children, and even men waited cheering as the plane dropped to the ground. The five Fury survivors of war hug tightly, and go their separate ways.

“Grady Paul Travis? Have you seen him? He’s tall, busted up crooked nose, cute, dumb smile, have you seen him? They told me he’d be on this flight.” Bible’s head whips around and his eyes lock with Grady’s as the woman shoves a photo into Bible’s face. He’s sees Bible’s finger point to him and he ducks, his heart racing. He hadn’t seen you in four years, he didn’t even think you’d be here, but he heard you calling for him. When you come around the corner where Bible had pointed you, you don’t see anyone you recognize until you see the man of your dreams rise to his feet above the crowd and you give a screech, letting into a dead run through the crowd, across the lot and springing into his arms.

“Even with a busted wing, he caught her.” Don chuckles to the crew, watching on for a moment as Mister Ass himself sinks to the ground holding this petite little woman against his big, blocky frame like she was the last ass he’d ever see.

“Wow, crazy huh?” Gordo states, his hispanic accent poking through. “Mister Ass had a girlfriend this whole time. They watch a moment longer as she slides a ring from her neck onto his finger.

“I’ll be damned. Mister Ass is a married man.” Bible laughs.

No closer as you got in the door, Grady was driving you into the couch, tugging off your dress as fast as he could.

“I promise, slow later, baby. But fast now.” He grunts, shimmying from his pants. Grabbing his throbbing cock, he gives you a sweet smile and you nod, nails digging into his shoulders as you wiggle your hips closer to him. He slides into you and and rams in deep.

“Grady!” You shriek, nails digging harder into his shoulders as he fucks you hard against the sofa.

“Yes baby. I love you. I love you. I love you. I mis’d ya so much. Shit baby, yes.” He grunts, feeling himself twitch inside you as your walls constrict around his cock.

“Grady. Grady, yes. Please.. I’m so close. C’mon baby.” You encourage, ramming your hips up to meet his in sloppy thrusts. He leans down, hugging you tight against him as his thrusts get sloppier.

“I love you.” He sobs, cumming as you roll your hips into his once more, orgasming blissfully in his cock. He grabs you tight, holding you against him as he sobs hard against you. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’ll never leave you again.” He assures, his cock still in you as his arms grip tight against you so hard you gasp for breath. You love every minute of him holding you, pressing infinite kisses to your bare skin as he holds you.

“I love you too, Grady. I love you, baby. I love you.” You whisper, gripping his arms.