#i would also tag this as amsterdam but. city. h

[outlying-hyppocrate]

fuck me why is amsterdam such a good song

[saints-row-2]

tagged by @smokepepsi 

Name: Rants 

Gender: im man

Star Sign: gemini which sucks bcs everyone makes very hurtful astrology posts

Height: 5′6 :/

Sexuality: gáy 

Lock screen: its......................................... h*mestuck. its one of the cards from the new h*mestuck tarot deck. the davekat one. yeah. yeah. 

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher: oh yeah like a million times like are you a middle aged dude whos nice to me? thats crush city. 

Where do you hope to see yourself in 10 years: hopefully published and living london or somewhere cool and writing a lot and also i have a bunch of tattoos and a cat and im good at video games

If you could go anywhere else right now where would it be?: somewhere cool... san francisco or new york or london or amsterdam. im a city dude for sure.

Your coolest Halloween costume?: ive never really gone in for halloween that much but uh i had a cute bat costume when i was a kid

What was your favorite 90’s TV show?: SOPRANOS which is just my favourite tv show, period, because i love CRIME 

Last kiss?: no comment

Favorite book?: Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux 

Have you ever been stood up?: not like... that i recall.. ive probably had friends flake on me to go to shit but never anything very dramatic or interesting

Have you ever been to Las Vegas?: nahhhhh i dont think i care that much about going other than pointing and laughing haha that is fallout 

Favorite pair of shoes: i have a pair of black leather converse and a pair of doc martens and those are the only shoes i own

Favorite fruit?: Fruit Good i love mango and watermelon and pineapple..

Stupidest thing you’ve ever done?: oh jesus christ. uhhh me and my friend egged his ex’s car once and then she egged our house in retaliation 

i tag UUUUUHHHHHH IDK @horreurscape @iwantyoumv @weirbeast @raulpanther @internationalspacehobo yknow man just like whoever 

[sylvasa]

ABC - want to get to know me?

I was tagged in this already on May 2nd by @resignedcatservant and wanted to fill this in ever since, but just kept forgetting until @kirpix tagged me today!

Rules: Answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs you would like to get to know better!

A - Age: 28 already

B - Birthplace:  I was born in a city not far northeast of Amsterdam, the Netherlands

C - Current time: 19:48 (7:48 pm)

D - Drink you last had: some multifruit drink mostly carrot juice

E - Easiest person to talk to: my husband

F - Favourite song: it varies, actually... currently I am really into "Nakamarra" by "Hiatus Kaiyote"

G - Grossest memory: When I was a kid, I was so sick that I actually got sick all over the downstairs bathroom... while we had our neighbour boy over for dinner. He never visited again.

H - Horror yes or no: big yes, but I don't scare easily. I prefer psychologic thriller/horror movies, especially when they could actually be real, such as "Get out"

I - In love: yes, and have been for almost four years now!

J - Jealous of people?: sometimes, but more envy than jealousy. I am envious of people that actually have the energy to do things except work...

K - Kids or Kittens?: Currently only kittens, perhaps someday a kid, who knows?

L - Love at first sight or should I walk by again?: I think it can happen, but is very rare. It is likely different for everyone, though.

M - Middle name: Jessica

N - Number of siblings: 1,5

O - One wish: to grow old happy and healthy, for everyone in the world

P - Person you called last: My colleague, when she called in sick

Q - Quote you like: "It is better to have lost and loved, than never to have loved at all", Alfred Tennyson

R - Reason to smile: my husband and my three wonderful cats

S - Song you sang last: "Calm after the Storm" by "The common linnets", practising it for a performance july 1st

T - Time you woke up: 8:24 this morning, which is very late for me, but I am kind of ill and feverish atm so I slept more than usual

U - Underwear colour: in general no specific colour

V - Vacation destination: I really want to go back to southern Germany; I went there a few times with my dad and I loved it. I also want to go back to Florence, Paris and London as my husband's never been to those yet and I'd love showing him

W - Worst habit: I mostly brush my teeth only once every day; I really hate brushing, so I do it only when I feel I have to, which is generally at the start of my day.

X - X-rays: Never had ones at the hospital, only regular ones at the dentist (they do so about every 3 years here)

Y - Your favourite food: Corn

Z - Zodiac sign: Scorpio

I am tagging @kirpix @nandinotnandy @lethargif @blackberrysummer @perpetuallynocturnal aaaand anyone else who wants to do this! Also if you don't want to, no sweat :)

[save-all-the-secrets]

ABC TAG @boganurgeois tagged me in this because she is a lovely little aries and don’t get me fucking started don’t get me hyped 

A- Age: 18

B- Birthplace: Ontario

C- Current Time: 9:39pm

D- Drink you last had: coffee mixed with chocolate milk and ice please someone stop me

E- Easiest people to talk to: Jay, we don’t talk that much anymore but it was always easy

F- Favourite Song: Yikes can’t pick one so i’ll do my top favs, Everlong By Foo Fighters, The Ocean by Against Me, Skinny Love by Bon Iver, About a girl by Nirvana, Degausser by Brand New, Fastlove by George Michael. La vie en rose by Edith piaf, Bath Salts by Highly Suspect  and Laura by PHOX

G- Grossest Memory: I can’t think of anything too specific other than when i used to eat bugs as a kid and all the times i’ve spewed blood from different weird scratches and cuts as a kid, but i do remember once picking my nose so violently when I was 7 that I got a nose bleed y’all date me

H- Horror or No Horror: SAKJSFHASHFABWJnwfjnwjnfwvvkbv babe, I watch Hardcore Gore films when I’m feeling sad

I- In love: I don’t believe in love, get back to me in 10 years and we’ll see

J- Jealous of people: OH YEAH BABY, i am exceptionally jealous of others, its not that i don’t want them to have nice things because that would be envious its just I want those nice things too, more like nice experiences because i’m a spoiled white girl

K- Killjoy or life of the party: hmm, alcohol tastes really bad but I’m always busting out some terrible theories or dancing, my university friends seem to think I’m fucking bomb (but also killjoy because MCR)

L- Love at first sight or should I walk by again: I think you should walk by again, I don’t believe love is instantaneous it definitely takes massive amounts of development if anyone can give me physical evidence tHAT IT EXISTS???

M- Middle Name: I haven’t got one, i just have a first and surname

N- Number of siblings: 1 older sister, i would love an older brother if anyone wants to adopt me as their sister

O- One Wish: To have Johnny Stevens fall in love with me and prove something is worth striving for

P- person you called last: The mothership (my mom man living away from home is rough I call her a bunch)

Q- Question you’re always asked: A variation of; Do you know you’re tall, do you play volleyball/basketball, you should be a model I’ve heard you need to be tall, YOU SURE YOU CAN GET A JOB WITH THAT DEGREEEEE?????????

R- Reason to smile: Marilyn Manson’s new album wooohhh baby

S- Surprise Party by Hoodie Allen

T- Time you woke up: 8am

U- Underwear colour: dark grey thong

V- Vacation destination: I would love to go back to San Fransisco but I would absolutely love to show Johnny Stevens all around amsterdam because he’s my favourite boy and thats my favourite city i’ve been to and I want to share it with him yikes maybe thats love let me think

W- worst habit: OKAY WAIT HERE GOES, nail biting and ripping, hair chewing, ripping out eyebrow hairs and eyelashes, skin pinching, pull at my piercings, taking to myself, pulling my earlobes, facial ticks, finger tapping during conversation, lip twitching when nervous, eye twitches, ripping the skin from my finger tips, etc

X- X-rays: one on my finger when I busted it in a door, a bunch on my back because of my spine (6’1 problems), one on my ankle because i messed it uPP, one on my left leg when i split it ope with a broken glass cup and i had to get skin grafted and 31 STITCHES LIKE HAVE YOU EVER FELT THAT KIND OF PAIN HMMM??

Y- Your comfort food:Mashed potatoes mama

Z- Zodiac Sign: Pisces zoom zoom

[nadowell]

i’m bored.

Rules: Answer these questions, and tag 20 amazing followers that you would like to get to know better.

Name: Nikolaas Mcnuggs

Nickname: nick, nv, nicklause, gaylord, dumbass

Zodiac sign: *gavin free voice* fesh

Hogwarts house: Slytherin

Height: around 5′6 and a half-5′7 (i think)

Sexual Orientation: queer/bi/pan/whatever, I say I’m gay a lot for someone who likes everyone

Ethnicity: as lindsay jones has in her twitter bio, ‘yo yo i’m white as blow’

Favorite fruit: Do berries count as fruit? idk, berries also mangos

Favorite season: Winter bc you can rug up and drink hot chocolatey melk

Favorite book series: Series? I can barely read one book, let alone a whole series. Probably how to train your dragon (the original) and the hunger games

Favorite fictional characters: My personality, Barry from the bee movie

2d (gorillaz), rhys (tftb), Taako and Lup (taz), Weiss and Neptune (rwby), Wash and Grif (rvb), Poe Dameron (sw), idk theres a lot

Favorite flower:  🤔 all flowers are nice especially the good smelling ones, maybe tulips, lavender or those little white star ones that smell v h*cking good 

Favorite scents: rain, coffee, the ocean, sunscreen, burning, cocoa + vanilla

Favorite color: Maroon-y purple and black

Favorite animal: Deers, cats

Favorite artist/band: impossible to name just one; franz ferdinand, arctic monkeys, the strokes, the killers, kanye west, tame impala, marina and the diamonds, beyonce, carly rae jepsen queen of bops

Coffee, tea, or hot cocoa?: Coffee i drink the most but I’ll happily drink all three

Average sleep hours: 7 minutes hours is probably my max

Number of blankets you sleep with: usually 2

Dream trip: Amsterdam, Tokyo, austin for rtx

Last thing Googled: "white star nice smelling flowers”

Blog created: late 2012 (I’ve seen hell)

How many blogs do I follow: 1,903, jfc i may have to go on an unfollowing spree

Number of followers: at least 3 and a half :)

What do I usually post about: Who fucking knows 

Do you get asks regularly: Not really, I wish my 3 and a half followers would send me something, even if it’s hate mail. 

What is your aesthetic: man made structures being overrun by nature, corrupted/glitch stuff, crunchy bass lines, being an ��art hoe’, southern gothic christianity (abandoned statues of saints, shit like that), cult demon fun, queer excellence, neon city lights, trans characters being played and written by trans people, people being beautiful whilst breaking gender roles, whatever else is in this tag

I tag @calumho-ods bc i know how much that gal loves talking about herself.

Also @adziedoodle, @exile-in-crimson, @probablywitchcraft, @rt-hub, @em-kaldwin @partinxs (if y’all want to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) and whomstever else wants to it. u can tag me if u want :^)

[dandelionder]

ABC tag

I was tagged by: @ineedyourlovebeforeifall, I’m so sorry JJ. This is looooong overdo.... but thank you darling as always for including me and wanting to know more. Don’t know how I’d survived these past months without you. 

Rules: answer the questions and tag some cool people

a - age: 18 b - biggest fear: Being stuck in a place I don’t thrive in with people I’ve grown out of.  c - current time: 13:20 (1:20 pm) d - drink you last had: ginger shot (like, it’s not with alcohol. It’s freshly gratted ginger you take in the morning to make you throat burn like the seven hells ) f - favorite song:��Okay so this changes every so often. There’s too many good songs in the world to not keep getting new ones. This is some I always enjoy: There will be time by Mumford and Sons, Ocean-Live by John Butler, Love me right (Chinese version) and Artificial Love by EXO, Highlight by SEVENTEEN (that mv kills me every time) and The Scientist by Coldplay.  g - ghosts, are they real: I don’t think in the ways people talk about them haunting us or being a floating body. I more believe that they may appear in the wind that scatters our papers, or comes down as the rain when we’re in need of water.  h - hometown: A fairly small town (around 100,000 inhabitants) by the Swedish east coast called Gävle. We moved two years ago and now I live closer to the capital in a very student friendly city called Uppsala.  i - in love with: Not really a person. More hobbies, or the way my friends make me happy, and nice summer days.  j - jealous of: People who know they have found their calling in life.   k - killed someone: Uuhh... why would I have? Most certainly NOT!  l - last time you cried: This Tuesday? I was stressed over school and didn’t feel like I could do anything. (turns out I can.)   m - middle name: Alma and Louise.  n - number of siblings: An older sister. o - one wish: That I at the end of it all had more good days than bad ones.  p - person you last called/texted: My sister called me. Just to ask how things were going and get the latest gossip. And the last ext was to a friend asking her address.  q - question(s) you’re always asked: “So... are you also going to be a pilot then?” (Hands down the most frequently asked question. Both my parents are pilots if any of you wondered.)  r - reasons to smile: It’s not raining today and it feels like summer is on it’s way. (Really, I’m a firm believer of “it’s the little things in life” so any reason is a good reason)  s - song last played: Playboy by EXO t - time you woke up: 9:20, then I snoozed until 9:45.  u - underwear color: Blue and beige.  v - vacation destination: Where I’m going this summer: The US and Gothenburg. Where I want to go whenever: New Zeeland, Amsterdam, South Korea, South Africa, China, Copenhagen, Paris.  w - worst habit: Sometimes talking without thinking first. Stressing myself up over things I can’t do anything about.   x - x-rays you’ve had: Just the inside of my mouth aka the teeth.  y - your favorite food: Grandma’s potato grain beats most things. And bell peppers, I love those. Oh! And soy beans. Especially soypasta!!! z - zodiac sign: Aquarious

Tagging: @yeol-stole-my-soul @the-princejinyoung @besternatexo @bellowitch-blog @kittae and @sweet-at-heart 

[padmesgreene]

a to z meme

Rules: Copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people and also tag the person who tagged you… And most importantly, have fun!

tagged by @gendryatrash  thank you love! Love this! I’m tagging:  @gendryxaryatrash @asongoftarthandlannister @puzzlingsnark@onceuponasuperlittlevampire @lightsaberswift @halfprincesshalfgoddess @miladyandtheba5tard

a - age: 17

b - biggest fear: dying without living my life to the fullest. Finish my life with no one who loves me.

c - current time: 13:09 pm

d - drink you last had: water

e - every day starts with: me eating my breakfast and reading news in my phone.

f - favorite song: I can’t choose. There’s a lot of good songs, but aone of my favs is Uptown Funk.

g - ghosts, are they real: I don’t know, but it would be awesome in some way.

h - hometown: here, some city on Argentina.

i - in love with: words, music, joe dempsie, armie hammer, my crush and henry cavill’s ass.

j - jealous of: people who eats a lot and never gets fat. And also people who have a high self-steem.

k - killed someone: mmm... nobody...yet.

l - last time you cried: i don’t remember, but i think it was three months ago. i cried for an entire day.

m - middle name: Iara.

n - number of siblings: one, a sister, who loves so much i don’t know why.

o - one wish:  be happy. Travel a lot. 

p - person you last called/texted: a bestfriend who lives in Peru.

q - questions you’re always asked: “how do you do that?” (so many people is surprised that I can talk English)

r - reasons to smile: Dogs. They’re so beautiful, pure and perfect.

s - song last sang: Heathens by Twenty One Pilots.

t - time you woke up: 10:00 am 

u - underwear color: grey

v - vacation destination: San Diego, Madrid, some city in Denmark and Amsterdam.

w - worst habit: bitting my lips. Doing an unconfortable noise with my hands. Moving my feets frenetically.

x - x-rays you’ve had: One for my ribs (the school is asking for it), one for my head (it was also to know if i was deppresed). Just that.

y - your favorite food: Ice Cream and pizza.

z - zodiac sign: aquarius.

[ifishouldvanish]

For Art and Happiness

Chapter 7: Two Women

Summary:  A repressed Belle runs from home to pursue a life of freedom in a new city. To support herself, she turns to modeling for local eccentric painter, Ross Gold. Known as the Town Pornographer, Gold’s avant-garde work and lifestyle exposes her to the very ideas her father sought to guard her from. Rating: M, for sexual themes Tags:  Sexual Repression, 19th Century, fin de siecle, Art History, Body Image, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Miscarriage mention, sexual anxiety This Chapter: Ross struggles to make peace with Cora’s departure. Valerie = Cruella Previous Chapters: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]

[Read on AO3]

Ross knocks impatiently on the heavy red door of the Schäfer’s home. There’s some shuffling about on the other side before he’s greeted by Mary Margaret’s voice.

“Just a minute!” She calls from inside.

“Take your time.” He sighs with petty annoyance, much to quietly for her to hear.

The door swings open a minute later, revealing Mary Margaret with the baby in her arms. She looks exhausted, but happy nonetheless. Ross is certain Mary Margaret grew up with every expectation that she would have midwives and house staff to help her care for any children she might have. But that isn’t the life of an artist, certainly not ones like he and David. She waved goodbye to such comforts when she married him, and while he might pity her naivete toward life amongst the city's lesser half, he has to admire her heart. Mary Margaret chose love. Unlike Cora.

“...Herr Gold.” Mary Margaret nods, putting on an uneasy smile.

Ross wets his lips. “Frau Schäfer.”

“What do you—” She cuts herself off and shakes her head. “Hi.” She says, smiling more convincingly this time. “Why don't you come in? David's in the studio.”

“Thank you.” He nods curtly, stepping inside. He looks at the baby in her arms with a smile. “Hello, Emma.” He says, poking a finger at her belly. She babbles and reaches for him, and Ross smiles.

“Things have been a bit chaotic here.” Mary Margaret admits with a chuckle, starting down the hall. “Everyone’s been in and out, preparing for the exhibition.”

Ross doesn’t say anything, his smile slipping away as he follows her inside. He hasn’t put much thought into the exhibition, despite all of Cora’s encouragement. If he’s honest, he always thought it was a bit of a dog and pony show, and a pathetic one at that— at least as far his circles were concerned. His colleagues were all vying for approval from the artistic elites and the Academy. No matter where he went— London, Paris, Amsterdam, Berlin, Prague— there was always some new school of artists intent on showing the world the full potential of what art could be. But quite frankly, Ross never gave half a rat’s arse whether or not people thought his art was any good. As long as he was getting enough sales and commissions to keep food on his table, he was happy.

Happy enough.

Mary Margaret gives him another uneasy smile as they step into the studio where David is cleaning his brushes. He hears them walk in and smiles, walking over and planting an affectionate kiss on his wife’s lips, and another on his daughter’s head, before the two scurry away again.

“Ah, Ross!” David looks at Ross with a broad, genuine smile. “It’s been far too long. How are you?”

“Fine.” He answers listlessly.

“How's Cora?”

Ross clears his throat. “...Engaged to be married.” He says as he steps further into the studio space. He immediately turns his focus to the rows of canvases along the wall.

David's expression freezes as he tries to decide whether he should be offering his congratulations or condolences. “When’s... the big day?” He asks tentatively.

Ross stops thumbing through the paintings and clicks his tongue. “That’s a lovely question.” He declares, spinning around with the snap of his fingers. “Perhaps you could ask our esteemed friend Herr Berger the next time he drops by to express his grievances against the Secession.”

David blinks. “Excuse me?”

“She’s marrying Berger.”

David’s expression dampens and he looks at his colleague helplessly. “Ross. ...I— I’m sorry.”

Ross scowls and goes back to browsing his work. “Well it’s hardly your fault now, is it?”

“No, but...” David furrows his brows and steps closer. “Why?” He asks in a whisper.

“Oh, something about her father’s farmland being the only place this side of the Donau where he can set up shop for his steel operation.”

“Ach.” David frowns. “I’ve gotten more than a few offers on this place myself. But after how hard Mutti and I had to fight to hold onto it? I’ll die before I let some industrialist turn it into a factory.”

Ross sighs and moves to the next pile. “Yes well, I’m afraid the only loyalties Herr Mϋller has are to his Schnapps.” He mutters. He quickly thumbs through the canvases and spins on his heels to face David again. “Was she here?” He asks abruptly.

David reels back, furrowing his brows. “...When?”

“Last week.” Ross clips. “I’m damnably curious to know if there's anything else she's been lying to me about.”

“I—” David clears his throat. “Yeah. She was in on Tuesday.” He peers around the studio, his eyes widening as they land on something. “Here—” He says, snapping a finger and walking up to one of the canvases he has set out to dry. “We worked on this.”

Ross studies the painting with a mixture of awe and anger. Cora looks beautiful, her auburn hair stylized as a rhythmic stream of sinuous lines and spirals, accented with gold leaf. She proudly holds up a platter, gazing reverently at something which has yet to be executed— a blank area waiting to be filled with a severed head.

“Salome.” Ross observes.

“That's right.”

“...Fitting.” He says bitterly. Of all the models he and David work with, who better to play the part of the femme fatale than his beloved Cora? He just can't decide if he's her Herod— a means to an end, or her John— the object of some perverse affection of hers.

A little smile tugs at David's lips. “You know... If you aren’t busy this afternoon, I think you would make a great John the Baptist.” He chuckles.

Ross huffs out a bitter laugh. “Indeed.”

“Honestly. Would you mind?” David nods toward the canvas he’d been working on before he arrived. “I'm waiting for the latest coat to dry.”

Ross looks around the studio and shrugs. “Where would you like me to sit?”

David picks the canvas up and surveys the room for a moment. “Usual seat should be fine.” He smiles, carrying it over to his easel.

  “So how are you holding up?” David asks, peeking around the canvas to look Ross in the eyes. “You two were always so… I don’t know, inseparable.” He shrugs, returning to his work.

“Well enough, I suppose.” Ross sighs. After a moment, he scoffs. “Part of me always expected it, honestly. I mean, look at me. What she ever saw, I will never understand. I’m lame, beaten, used up, old—”

“Ach!” David shakes his head and Ross rolls his eyes. He doesn’t need to anyone’s pity. “Alright, alright.” David laughs, “So you are lame and banged up and older than most of us. But—  you are also brilliant!”

Ross tries not to glow under his praise. David is the kind of man Ross wishes he was. Warm, kind, open. Likeable. David may be much younger than he is, but Ross respects the man and the thought that he sees anything admirable in him is a comfort, as much as he hates to admit it.

“Prolific, passionate, experienced, wise ...Handsome?” David continues, wiggling his brows.

A little smirk tugs at Ross’ lips. “...Now I know you’re full of it.”

“You have a great face for portraiture!” David insists, “The angles, the way the light hits your features. It's very intense, expressive.” He puts his brush down and takes a step back to evaluate his progress. “Rembrandt and Caravaggio would have been very lucky to paint a face like yours.”

Ross allows himself a tiny smile at this, but quickly wipes it away. “My art is suffering.” He confesses, trying to change the subject. “Nothing I do seems to satisfy me. I’m becoming frustrated.”

“I think that’s understandable.” David shrugs, picking his brush back up and continuing to work. “You and Cora were quite the team. But you’ll find something or someone else to inspire you. You just need a new perspective.”

“It’s not just Cora though.” Ross mumbles. “I’ve felt myself slipping the past few months.”

“It happens. But you’ve got the soul of a true artist, Ross. You’ll come back from it.”

He considers this for a moment. He doesn’t hate everything he’s done the past few months. Looking back on the past few weeks, he can actually recall a few pieces he’s pleased with. There’s the charcoal he did of Belle, the commission for Herr Hutmacher, a painting of Belle—

He suddenly feels his mouth go dry and clears his throat. “Have you—” He sighs and wets his lips. “H-have you ever had a young woman by the name of Belle come by? To sit for you?”

“Belle?” David pouts and hums thoughtfully. “No, I can’t say that I have.”

“She came to sit for me a few weeks ago. Comes by quite often.”

“Why do you ask?”

“I gave her your information last week. Told her you might have more work for her. Curious, is all.”

David frowns. “Could you describe her?”

“Petite.” He shrugs. “Brown hair, beautiful blue eyes… An accent you wouldn’t soon forget. ...She’s ah, French.” He explains with a cough.

David peeks at him from behind the easel and smiles. “...Nope.” He says, disappearing once again. “Doesn’t sound familiar.”

 *****

 Ross’ visit to the Schäfer’s yesterday has left him with more questions than answers. He was hoping to catch Cora in a lie. To find out she never stepped foot in David’s studio last week at all, but had instead been plotting and scheming to leave him all along. It would make it so much easier for him to let her go. But now he just feels more confused.

His eyes dart back and forth between the two women sprawled out on his floor, and the drawing on his easel. He’s producing shite today again. The lines he puts down lack certainty, and his drawing altogether is nothing more than a mockery of the scene before him. Valerie and Ursula are women in love, lit from within by a flame they each ignite in the other when they touch.

He and Cora had such a flame, or so he thought.

Ross tears the paper from his easel and scrunches it up. “Verdammt!” He hurls the balled-up drawing across the room and it lands on the floor, joining the pile of all his other abandoned efforts from the past week. The two women finally stop caressing each other in favor of sitting up and glaring at him. He tries to ignore them, fixing his gaze on the floor and kicking a crate of supplies. The few inches the heavy thing moves aren’t even close to worth the pain that shoots up his leg, causing him to yelp in pain. The whole display is more embarrassing than anything else.

“It is incredible,” Valerie scoffs and leans into Ursula's ear. “So much anger in such little man...”

“Shut up!” Ross hisses, pointing his stick of charcoal at her threateningly. Both women let out a snort of laughter that makes him fume even more.

“Do not worry. I would be angry, too.” Valerie pouts, taking a feigned kind of pity on him. “If I were man who cannot draw, cannot paint, cannot keep woman, cannot— how you say— get it up.”

“Valerie!” Ursula says through a giggle, giving her a shove. “Don’t bite the hand that feeds.”

“Eh,” Valerie shrugs and stretches over to her pile of clothes, searching for her cigarette case. It’s an ornately engraved silver piece, an artifact from the comfortable life she’d left behind in Prague’s Dejvice district.

“You know,” Ross warns, “your friend has a point.”

Valerie tilts her head back and laughs, then lights her cigarette. “You want to threaten me? I get you soap box so you can look into my eyes when you do it. ...Little man.”

Ross clenches his jaw and lets out a huff. He should have fired Valerie the first time she started with the comments about his height and fragile ego, but he's not too proud to admit that he's a lonely man, and he finds himself enjoying her and Ursula's company for reasons that defy his comprehension.

“See, Ulla?” Valerie says, nodding toward him with an amused grin. “What will he do? Nothing.”

Ross relaxes his jaw and exhales slowly. She’s right. He won’t do a damned thing.

“Alright, I’m sorry.” Ursula sighs. “Sore subject, but... Berger?” She says, cringing as she says the name. Her forehead wrinkles from the way she raises her brows. “The same Berger who tried to pay off your landlord to kick you two out? And when that failed, reported you for harboring unregistered prostitutes?”

“Aye, that’s the one!” Ross says bitterly, dropping his charcoal into his tin and readying another sheet of paper on his easel. Perhaps he’ll have better luck with crayon today.

“Well, you seem to be taking it well.” She says dryly, eyeing the crumpled up drawings and deserted canvases that litter the floor. Several of Cora’s portraits have been torn off the walls and ripped to pieces, and one unlucky canvas seems to have been stabbed at least twenty times with a palette knife. “You really loved her, didn't you?”

“Well, I wouldn't let her live here with me if I hated her, now would I?” He snarls, and Ursula rolls her eyes.

“You waste your time,” Valerie says, taking a drag of her cigarette.

“And you— ” Ross steps over to her and plucks it from her lips, “waste your money.”

“Hej— what I use my kronen for is not your business,” she snips, taking it back.

“Ah...” he chuckles, wagging a finger at her. “And what I spend my time on is none of yours.”

“Fair enough.” She shrugs and puffs on her cigarette.

Ross waits, folding his arms and raising his brows expectantly.

“But I tell you—” She starts up again and Ross can't help but smile at the impending dose of unwarranted advice. “Cora is no good. Can smell it on her. Like corpse rotting from inside out.” She pauses and exhales a ring of smoke. “...You should get dog.” She says with sudden decisiveness. “They smell rotting flesh from mile away.”

Ross stops rifling for a crayon and narrows his eyes at her, bewildered. “What in the hell are you talking about? What the hell am I going to do with a fucking dog?!”

She wags her smoking hand about as she arrives at an explanation. “You don’t have such problem to begin with if you have dog. Cora works for you first time, dog growls, and you know—  Cora is no good. ” She puffs out a ring of smoke and wrinkles her nose. “Send her packing before you get penis involved.”

In his emotionally compromised state, Ross doesn’t think a guard dog for his heart sounds like too bad of an idea. Not that he’ll admit to it.

“...Just suggestion.” Valerie says with a shrug after his lack of response.

“Well, in case it wasn’t clear: I don’t pay you to make suggestions,” he grumbles, finally putting crayon to paper.

“You should,” She snickers, a sly smile shaping her lips. “I can teach you how to please woman— no dick necessary. Is that not right, Ulla?”

Ursula snorts. “I think that is the least of Ross’ problems.”

Ross clenches his fist and breaks his crayon in two. “I could please her just fine!”

“You’re so smart,” Valerie chuckles, leaning in to peck Ursula on the cheek. “This is why I love you.” She looks back to Ross and shakes her head. “My husband— thought same thing.”

“Oh? You mean the one you murdered?” Ross points out, digging through his tin for another crayon that hasn’t already been reduced to a nub.

Valerie draws back and puts a hand over her heart. “It was accident.”

“Sure it was.”

Abandoning appearances, she shrugs her shoulders and points at him with her cigarette. “I make it look like one. Police in Praha… very stupid. See no difference.”

Ross rolls his eyes and looks at Ursula. “And you sleep next to this woman every night?”

“Quite soundly.” She nods.

“See?” Valerie drapes an arm around Ulla’s shoulder. “Because I kill man, she knows I can protect her.” She smiles, leaning in and nuzzling her neck.

“So you’re saying—” Ross scoffs and resumes drawing, “I should have killed Herr Berger?”

“Jistý. ...If you want, I can show you how to make it look like accident too.” She offers boastfully. Her expression suddenly darkens and she hunches forward. “But I will be honest to you, Herr Gold— because you amuse me. Cora… she leave you either way.”

Ross groans and stares blankly ahead. “So are you saying she was just a good liar, then?”

“No, no. You do not understand. She loves you. But she leave you still. Such is the cruel bitch that is life.” She laughs and shakes her head. “You men, so naive.”

Ross groans and rolls his eyes. “Ursula, what the hell is she talking about?”

“Women like Cora are raised early on to forget about love. Marry for money, marry for status. Something silly romantic men like you don't understand.”

Ross raises his brows and blinks repeatedly in disbelief. “I'm silly and romantic?”

Valerie and Ulla look at each other for a moment and burst into laughter. “...Yes!”

He scowls. Silly? Ross Gold is not silly and romantic, he thinks. Ross Gold is… sensible. Hardened by the heartless world around him. Dark, even. And romantic? He’s anything but. Unloved and unloving. An enemy of love, and Cora had been his ally.

“I think Cora loved you.” Ursula finally says to comfort him, “but to her, the money and status is more important. I’m sorry Ross, but I don’t think you ever stood a chance.”

“Then what is the goddamned point!?” He snaps, giving his easel a shove. It's such a pointless act, doing nothing to quench the flame of frustration in his chest. He takes a deep breath to compose himself, and the frustration turns to sorrow. “Why bother getting attached to somebody just to… abandon them?” He slouches his shoulders and sulks across the studio to plop into the armchair.

“Well if I remember correctly, you never asked for her hand...” Ursula says. “Can’t blame the girl for moving o—”

“Of course I didn’t ask for her hand! She never wanted that!” Ross blurts as the frustration returns for a fleeting moment, leaving him again as quickly as it came. “We were just… fine the way things were,” he mutters under his breath, not sounding the least bit convinced of it himself.

“She must think about children.” Valerie says. “Place like this— no good.”

“She doesn't even like children!”

“Ne, she does not like street vermin you let in and feed like your own.” Valerie says, pointing in the air with her cigarette. “Woman must think about her children. But me? I decide very quick, no children.”

“I don’t understand.” Ross sighs, rubbing a hand over his face. “I asked her: ‘Are you happy, sweetheart?’ And she gave me every assurance that she was.”

Valerie plucks another cigarette from her case and offers it to him. After a moment's hesitation, he tucks it between his lips and leans in so she can light it. He smokes in silence in for a moment, his thumb rubbing over the crayon in his other hand while his eyes scan over the portraits of Cora that remain on the walls.

“When she didn't come back from David's the first night… It was like I could sense something was wrong, you know? I was going to visit and check on her, but I told myself no— she likes her space, leave it, she will come back when she’s ready… And now— And now...”

Ross’ lip quivers and he curls in on himself. The feeling is back. The emptiness. The shame. He takes a series of heaving breaths until the overwhelming panic subsides.

“...Now she’s gone...” He exhales slowly. His shoulders ease a little and he takes another deep breath. “...Now’s she’s gone.”

“See? It is okay.” Valerie hushes, patting a hand on his lap. “You will meet another woman. Maybe next one will be more young, bigger breasts, not so tall…” She snorts, “Next to her, you might almost feel like real man.”

“Have you any idea how many women I’ve met over the years?” Ross sighs. “Cora was… she was just different.”

Valerie scowls. “Like I say— you waste your time on that one.”

Ross rolls his eyes and takes a long drag on his cigarette.

“Listen, Ross.” Ulla says. “You just need to take your heartbreak and put it into your art. Suffer for the art, like the rest of your colleagues.”

“Oh, that's original.” He scoffs, carelessly throwing his crayon across the room. It strikes the wall and mars one of Cora's portraits with a harsh black line.

“David produced some of his best work while he was holding a torch for Mary Margaret.” Ursula points out. “That is all.”

“Exactly!” Valerie chimes in. “David's work now? Nothing special.”

“And Mal?” Ulla adds, “The work she did after her beloved Ružička was wed to that Stephan— some of the most inspired pieces I've ever seen.”

Ross presses the heels of his palms over his eyes and groans, slouching back into his chair. “Mal Fiala has not produced a single canvas in years.” He reminds them.

“Ich weiß...” Ulla sighs. “It is a tragedy.”

“Better to make no art than bad art, I say.” Valerie shrugs. “Or worse—  so-so art.” She adds sourly. “This is why now, we sit for you, Herr Gold. Ulla and I, we follow the talent.” She says proudly, making another dramatic gesture with her smoking hand. “People think we follow the kronen, but this is not true. We do not sit for just anybody. We have taste. Standards.”

Ross raises a brow at her and plucks the cigarette from between his lips. “Is that all? ...And after all this time, I was beginning to think it was because we were friends.” He jokes.

“...Friends?” Valerie tries to frown, but a smile quickly takes hold of her lips. “I do not know what this word means, Herr Gold! But I do know, if there are going to be portraits of me in museum fifty years from now, they will be damned good portraits. And when I am dead, if people think I am secret lover of yours, I say, even better.”

“My lover?” Ross tries not to retch at the thought. “Wouldn't you rather be remembered as the sapphic murderess you really are?”

“Eh.” Valerie snorts and taps the ashes from her cigarette. “People will look at your drawings of Ulla and me making love, read her poems to me, and say, ‘How nice it is, that white woman and black woman are friends!’ More stupid than police in Praha.” She snickers, “But! You do enough drawings of me, they will assume I am your Miláček. The scholars will wonder, ‘Who is enchanting woman in Ross Gold's art? So beautiful and free-spirited she is!’ I will become symbol, like Mona Lisa, and live forever.”

"I hate to disappoint," Ross sighs, “But at this rate, the only place my work will end up is in the trash.”

“Ne, ne, ne.” Valerie tuts. “Your work belongs in trash, I will be first to tell you. Like true friend.”

He raises a brow at her. “I thought you said we weren’t friends.”

She scowls. “You are one of least stupid people in Wien, so for you I make exception.”

Ross presses his lips into a thin line, trying to decide if he should be flattered or not.

“...Still pretty stupid though.”

He groans internally and rolls his eyes. “Go, both of you. Get dressed. We're done here.”

Both women roll their eyes and get up, plucking their clothes of the floor.

“I still expect full day's pay.” Valerie mutters as she dresses herself.

Ross waves the two of them away. “You know where I keep it.” He mumbles.

Valerie grins and saunters over to the little end table in the corner. “Yes, I do...” She hums, pulling the drawer open and grabbing more than her share of crowns. “Come, Ulla. We get drunk tonight.” She looks to Ross with a smirk. “Gold— What do you say you come with us? I feel generous. Let me buy you drink with your money.”

Ross shoots her a defeated look.

“Eh.” She waves her hand dismissively. “You are probably sad drunk, anyway.”

They finish dressing and head to the front door. Ulla pauses when she rests her hand on the knob. "Sure you don't want to come?"

Ross slouches deeper into his chair and lets out a puff of smoke. "Quite certain."

A/N:

In the New Testament, Salome dances for and seduces her stepfather Herod, who in return offers to give her anything she wishes, up to half of his kingdom. Salome’s mother tells her to request the head of John the Baptist on a silver platter, and Herod delivers.

Oscar Wilde wrote a play based on this story in 1894. In his version, Salome is infatuated with John, and demands his head after he rejects her. In art of this time, Salome was frequently used to represent the femme fatale, the dangers of seduction, and the world of vice and hedonism that developed alongside the industrial revolution.

Prior to this time period, Salome was depicted as an innocent girl unaware her sexuality, but the Symbolist Salome was a very witting seductress. The art is kind of amazing (tw for severed heads?):

“The Apparition” by Gustav Moreau, 1877. Oil on Canvas. (Moreau did a TON of Salomes and they’re all gorgeous)

“Salome” by Lucien Levy Dhurmer, 1896. Pastel.

“Salome” by Max Oppenheimer, 1913. Oil on Canvas. (NSFW, probably?)