#i wonder. bc ultimately his goal was to harness hildes power regardless of the outcome right. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

windupaidoneus · 2 months ago

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ok ive slept (thinks about this harder)

been thinking abt emet teaching hilde black magic during shb. why not. he would already have been learning it... more potential for misery & angst afootttt

#when i was running fates in kholusia. ohhhhh i was thinkinggg abt itttt #esp bc i was in north kholusia for it. while the talos was being built... i was studying the dark arts with our enemy(?)...#& the thing is he wouldddd. since he offered to be of assistance if needed. yknow?#would part of him hope better mastery over magic as a whole (& astral aspected magic specifically) would help hilde contain the light...#i wonder. bc ultimately his goal was to harness hildes power regardless of the outcome right.#but surely part of him also wished for his old companion to return to him. even just a bit. even if he knew hilde isnt 1:1 lachesis...#& well part of him probably felt sick glee knowing a shard of lachesis' crazy prideful ass was taking His advice #doubtless lachesis did ask for guidance here & there further along into their time together #but like. it's still some form of asserting dominance. over lachesis. which. very fucked up thing to apply to hilde when he has no memories #definitely skews the tone of their dynamic... & hilde doesnt really have much of a clue hes also busy being stressed out his mind #yknow bc of the light & everything. no big deal though.#yeah i think some form of weird almost situationship mightve happened before mt gulg. what of it.#most of all emet badly misses lachesis & well the kind of battle for dominance was part of their dynamic even if he mostly lost... lol!#however in his twisted (tempered) mind things wouldve doubtless been tinted differently at that time #for sure when he died & his soul was freed from tempering he was like. man. what the hell was that actually. embarrassing of me.#with him & lachesis parting on such harsh terms though he certainly had... feelings! about it all...#esp since he had intentionally or not gone against the 'never seek me out ever again' already #the years spent in solitude combined w the tempering warping his mindset. making him resentful. & yet.#the fact all these fragments of lachesis he met he Knew. he recognised the exact tint of their soul colour #down to knowing which headmate they once were. but none of them recognised him. & well he couldnt save any of them.#he never Actively Tried to save them because his duty came first no matter what but there was always a small lingering hope #the guilt of knowing he'd gone against what were to him lachesis' final wishes since he never saw him again after that #that guilt mixing with the bitterness of being left even if he did consider it to be his own fault for siding w the convocation #& now hed sided w the convocation well. go big or go home. he'd lost so much to that decision he had to make the most out of it.#god. see what i mean? it's all so fuckedddd they're so fucked. very dysfunctional dynamic in shb i can tell you that much

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