#i wonder if. she would use a crocheted shopping bag. she has a shopping bag she likes that she carries around with her but she usually has

[fingertipsmp3]

Guys I want to knit and/or crochet my grandma something for her birthday but I can’t work out what she would want. What would you want if you were my grandma

[truglori]

Homebody (Ch.12)

Summary: Amiyah is the younger sister of local drug dealer (Durkio). Shy and reserved she keeps to herself and stays out the way. But lately she began to find interest in his right hand man/ best friend (Erik Stevens). Wanting to get him to notice her she discovers that he already had her wrapped around his finger without even trying! There was only a few problems that kept her away from her fantasies , her brother that controlled almost every single breath she took and would kill anyone who looked at her that way and lastly Eriks girlfriend, Alexis , who they called the queen of the hood according to her lavish lifestyle as well as being with the next newest top boy in the making. While Alexis was his girl to the streets all Amiyah wanted to do was be his Homebody...

Pairing: Erik Stevens x Thick OC

Warning: Language, Smoking

1 1/2 months later

The music from Amiyah’s speaker played at a low level. She was currently in the process of setting up an organizer for her perfume collection. Going back in forth between the instructions on the manual and screwing in the tiny nails she was growing frustrated. It’s been almost and hour now and she was only able to put together two shelves. Throwing down the paper she stood up and slipped on her house shoes. Amiyah needed a break to keep herself from becoming irritated so she walked to the kitchen for a snack.

Keys unlocking the front door caught her attention. It was Durk walking in with another Louis Vuitton bag for the fourth time this week. Amiyah knitted her eyebrows together wondering what was up with all of the shopping he’s been doing. She watched him walk to his to put away his items before he walked back into the livingroom.

“What’s up sis? You didn’t have to work today?” Durk asked pulling out his weed tray and breaking down the bud.

Amiyah walked over to him and sat down. “Nope I was just getting ready to make me some food but I’m too tired to cook.” Taking a pillow she cradled it in her lap.

He snickered rolling up his blunt. “I’ll order something for you if you want?”

Nodding her head Amiyah grabbed the remote to the tv and turned it on. She flipped through the channels hoping to find something to ease her mind for the moment. Durk leaned back next to her sparking up the blunt. Amiyah watched him inhale and exhale the smoke through his nose. Reaching her hand out she made a gesture asking for a hit.

“You know damn well you don’t smoke.” He removed the blunt from his mouth but handed it to her anyway. Durk figured it would be funny to see her try to get high for the first time.

Amiyah grabbed it using her nail tips she took a pull and inhaled the smoke smoothly and blew it out. She did it a few times and then she passed it back.

Durk furrowed his brows looking surprise before sending her a blank stare. “Miyah who the hell taught you how to do that?” He asked gently snatching the blunt away from her.

She laughed and was about to say his name before she caught herself. Shrugging her shoulders her eyes fell to the floor. The grip on her pillow tightened against her chest. Her memory went back to the night she watched how Erik did his technique in the car and she copied him. The thought of him made her sad all over again. Amiyah would always do good until she did something that reminded her of him then she would get a strong feeling of emotions that washed over her.

It’s been over a month since she last seen him. Since the night she ended it with him to be exact. After that it was like he never existed. No more phone calls or text messages. He hasn’t even been by the apartment since then either. Before, if she saw her brother coming in she knew that Erik would be right there behind him with his beautiful smirk on his face that displayed his dimples. But there’s been nothing and it made her miserable inside.

Amiyah didn’t want to be the reason for him to not come over anymore. She was used to seeing his face almost every other day and to see that it changed because of her made her upset with herself. Not only that, because of his absence, Amiyah didn’t know if Erik and her brother were still good friends. Durk had mentioned his in a conversation a week after their last exchange and that was the last time. Amiyah was worried about him. She wanted to know how he was doing but mostly she wanted to have a second chance with him.

“Yo what you got a taste for?” Durk snapped her out of her thoughts.

“Uh it doesn’t matter. Whatever you order.” She sighed sitting the pillow next to her.

He nodded his head as he finished his blunt putting it in his ashtray. A text notification came to his phone. Amiyah heard him curse before messaging whoever it was back.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just going back and forth with this promoter about letting me throw a bash at the club for the night. You know with Valentines Day coming up on Saturday.” Durk answered staying on his phone.

Amiyah knitted her brows. “Why you tryna throw a bash? Why not just get VIP and call it a night?” She asked confused leaning her head on her hand.

Durk smacked his lips. “Because I’m doing this for the whole hood. Plus it’s a celebration for something else that I’m not telling yo nosy ass about. But I’m have my niggas to the right and nothing but bad bitches to the left. It’s bout to be a movie.” He playfully plucked her nose before getting up going into the kitchen.

Amiyah followed after she heard who he planned to have there. Erik popped into her head. She wanted to know if he was going to be one of the members in the group. She had to know so she figured she could ask for an invite.

“Well can I go?” She sat on the counter next to him.

Durk chuckled. “Since when you go to parties?”

“Since now. So can I come?” Folding her arms she pressed for the second time.

“No. Amiyah I’m not allowing you around these people. You know I don’t like you being around that type of shit anyway.” He stated while eating grapes from out of the package.

Amiyah scoffed. “ ‘Allow’? Durk I thought we just made up about this. You promised you would stop treating me like a baby and let me live and learn responsibility. That was what you told me, remember?”

After her and Erik’s first argument she had him take her home. Later that night Durk came back to find her there. He was happy that she decided to come back and they talked out their problems. Amiyah told him how she felt about him treating her like a child and how he had to stop. Durk was hesitant but agreed in letting her make her own choices from now on to help her become responsible.

Placing the bag of fruit on the table Durk eyed his sister folding his arms as well. He shook his head as he gave in.

“Damn alright you can go but yo ass is standing beside me the whole night. I’m not playing with you Amiyah.”

Interrupting him Amiyah hopped off the counter jumping up and down clapping her hands. She skipped up to him and wrapped her arms around his body giving him a bear hug.

“Thank you big brother!” She grabbed his face bringing it down to kiss his cheek.

“Miyah stop acting like I keep yo ass chained up in this house all day ‘fore I change my mind. Extra ass.” He pushed her away.

“Okay I have to get an outfit, my nails done. Can I bring Kelly? Who’s all going to be there?” She rushed him with questions.

“I guess you can bring the one and only lil friend you got.” He laughed.

Amiyah pushed his shoulder. “Okay but who’s gonna be there?” She asked hoping to get the answer she was anticipating for.

He shrugged. “I don’t know shit Moe, Erik, Cane, and a few other people I rock with.”

Her heart stopped when she heard Erik’s name. But when she heard Cane’s she felt her stomach flutter with nerves. How the hell did her brother know Cane? It was too much for her to catch up with the fact that two of the guys in his circle had her caught up. If they were both planning on being at the bash then Amiyah would try her best to avoid being around them at the same time.

“Cool!” She gave a half smile.

Durk snapped his fingers. “Oh I’ve been meaning to ask you. Your birthday coming up in a few weeks. Got any plans?”

“No not really. Why?” She stepped closer trying to figure out what he had planned.

“If you down I was thinking outta the country and a place that has dazzling white sand and water so clear that you can see your toes in it. What you think about that?” He asked speaking in a narrator tone.

Amiyah covered her mouth. “Please tell me you’re talking about what I think you’re talking about?”

Durk laughed at her reaction. “You tryna go to Turks and Caicos or what?”

Amiyah jumped on him as he caught her. Turks and Caicos was one of her top places she had on her traveling bucket list. She couldn’t believe that he was able to make this happen for her. She was truly greaful but curious.

“Wait I want to go but why you trying to bring me now? You coming up on here with shopping bags every other day and now you taking me on vacation. I mean I know you got money and everything but did you win the lottery or something?” She asked playfully unable to contain her smile.

He laughed. “You asking too many questions. Next week I’ll give you some money so you can start shopping for the trip. But right now I got to go check out the venue I’ll be back. Love you kid.” He tapped her head before leaving.

Amiyah smiled watching her brother disappear out the door.

__________________________________

“So you tryna tell me you never saw the movie Soul Food?” Harmony stopped in the middle of crocheting her blanket.

Erik chuckled shaking his head. “Nah I told you I wasn’t a big movie watcher growing up.”

“But Soul Food is a classic though. Like how you do as a black person go your whole life without watching it? Make it make sense Erik?” She giggled going back to her knitting.

“Damn you ain’t gotta come for my childhood like that though.” He sat up on her furniture.

“Oh that’s right I keep forgetting your younger than me so I understand.”

Erik rolled his eyes shaking his head. He was 25 and she was 26. Harmony only had him by one year and always had to bring it up almost every time they got together. But Erik knew it was nothing but jokes with her. They were at her duplex hanging out for the afternoon. Over the past couple of weeks Erik got acquainted with Harmony really well. Her and her brother took over the bar where she worked that her parents passed down to them. She lived right around the block from him. But also they had a lot in common. Both were private people, had similar taste in music, like the same foods, and the lastly great at being single.

Harmony surprised him the first time they had a real deep conversation. She let him know that she wasn’t too bothered with trying to get into a relationship. She said she always had problems in the past so she never did much to try to strive for a new one, but she did remain open minded in the same instance. To Erik she was cool about it and didn’t really bring it up unless he spoke on the subject. They were only friends but they did mess around two or three times, if you want to count a quickie in the bathroom of the bar that she worked at as once.

Their escapades started two weeks ago. Erik thought for sure that he was going to have to deal with her sudden clingy-ness but it didn’t turn out like that. He had to reach out to her afterwards and Harmony told him that she was okay with being friends and fucking at the same time. After that they became somewhat close friends.

Erik got a text from Durk asking to meet up with him about the Valentines Day bash he was throwing. Sending a text back that he was on the way he slipped his phone in his pocket and stood up from the couch.

“I would love to stay but I gotta meet up with someone.” He looked down at her.

Harmony stood up nodding her head. “I’ll walk you out.”

Walking to the door Erik turned around. “Listen my mans is throwing this party on Saturday. If you want to come you can if you free.” He sucked in his top lip.

Harmony smirked biting her bottom one. She stepped closer towards him with a hand on her hip. “You tryna introduce me to your boys already?”

He glanced back in her house before back at her. “I’m just inviting you out to have a good time but if you happened to meet them while doing so then shit yeah.”

Grabbing his shirt she pulled him down to her level and kissed him. Erik wrapped one of his free arms around her tiny waist and traveled down her back to her ass cheeks gripping her left one. He felt her moan into his mouth before she broke the kiss.

Wiping the gloss from his lips she pushed him away and smirked. “I’ll be there.” She stated eyeing him up and down and then closed her door on him.

It took Erik twenty minutes to make it to the auto garage. Getting out and locking his car he headed inside to see Durk, Moe, and Cane gathered around one of the vehicles parked inside. The moment Erik made eye contact with Cane he felt the anger within him ignite. Just being in his presence always made Erik put the blame on him for how things between him and Amiyah ended. When he found out that he took her on a date behind his back Erik was heated and wanted to fuck him up but had to hold off because he didn’t want Durk to know the reason behind it but when Amiyah told him that he kissed her Erik was livid. He couldn’t believe that the same kid who he thought he would like was the same one who turned out to be a snake.

Erik kept his distance from Cane since he put the two and two together and kept it that way. They never said a word to each other unless they had to work with Durk. Strictly for business and that’s all. But Erik was still on edge with Cane knowing about him and Amiyah even though they weren’t together anymore, he just didn’t like the fact that the little nigga had something on him.

Walking up to the trio Erik dapped Mor and Durk, purposefully leaving Cane out. Durk gave a look wondering what was the animosity that the two had against each other all of a sudden before shaking it off.

“What’s up E! Fuck you been at nigga?” Durk asked leaning on the hood of the truck.

“Chillin. So what’s going on with this party you throwing? What’s up with that?” Erik stood next to him between him and Moe.

Durk smirked and paused looking at them. “I just figured I could celebrate the fact that I’m fifteen million dollars richer than a bitch and now in business with Shawns old connect.”

“Damn nigga you finally made that shit happen. Now you could put me in charge of some of these corners, take some of the load of your hands.” Cane spoke with excitement as he dapped him up.

Durk laughed. “Nigga you gonna have to earn that shit. Ain’t nothing given over here.” He nudged him back.

Cane smacked his lips shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Aye congrats man.” Moe spoke up.

Durk saluted him before turning to Erik.

“Erik what you think about that? You know when we get our first few keys I’ma need some help. I want you to be my partner.”

“Nah. I’m not tryna get into this type of business man. I told you after this last job we just did three weeks ago was it for me. I’m done.” Erik spoke truthfully.

Durk shook his head. “Well you didn’t look done to me when we was getting that money.”

*Three Weeks Ago*

Moe sat behind the wheel of the all blacked out SUV. Erik rested in the passenger seat while Durk and Cane hid in the back. Parked at least 200 ft away from the small luxurious house with a fence surrounding the perimeter. Erik used his binoculars to find where his target and accomplice were. It was eight at night and Alexis sent Durk a text letting them know that the two of them would be leaving soon. She informed them about the weekend trip he was bringing her on and told them that it would be better for them to come and get the money after they were gone.

Erik heard an irritated sigh leave out of Canes mouth.

“When these muthafuckas gon leave? I’m tryna get these M’s and be out. We already looking suspicious being in this big ass car.” He sucked his teeth putting on his black gloves.

“Nigga would you shut the fuck up. Yo ass been talking for the past ten minutes.” Durk blew out smoke from his blunt.

“Look she said they was gonna be out any minute now so chill the fuck out!” Erik’s voice heightened without looking back.

Within the next fifteen minutes Alexis was walking out with Shawn. They put their luggage in the trunk before hopping inside the car. After a few minutes of observing them Erik watched as they pulled out the gated driveway and down the road. Durk waited until he got a text from Alexis letting him know that they were on the highway heading to the airport. Moe turned on the truck and pulled up right in front of the house to make it easier to getaway. Getting out Erik, Durk, and Cane put on their gloves and ski mask on their heads so that by the time they would walk inside the home they could pull them down to avoid any security cameras.

“Y’all niggas know the fucking drill. We get the money and we out this bitch. Cane grab the duffles.” Durk instructed as he put his glock on his waist.

Erik watched as Cane did was he was told. His expression was irritated by the fact that he had to take orders which Erik figured he wasn’t to doing. Cane had the attitude of trying to be a leader but he just didn’t know how to operate as one yet. Erik picked up his own duffle and walked to the driver side where Moe was seated.

“You remember the signal right? Hit the lock alarm on the truck in a pattern of three times if you feel like something’s wrong.”

“But Durk said not to interrupt unless I actually see someone coming.” Moe stated unsure.

Looking over towards Durk and Cane who were waiting Erik shook his head turning back to Moe. “Trust me man. If you feel like something is wrong give us a heads up. Better safe and out of jail than sorry. Got it?” Erik knitted his eyebrows letting him know that he was serious.

Moe nodded and rolled up his window. Erik then started to hike towards the gate. Entering the code that was given to him he put it in watching the wide gates open slowly. They headed towards the house. Checking around the perimeter of the area, they planned to avoid using the front door. So they asked Alexis to leave one of her side doors unlocked. Cane walked towards it first and wiggled the handle. When the door popped up with ease he looked back and smiled before sliding his mask over his face. Durk and Erik did the same following him inside.

The three pair of eyes wandered around in amaze as the toured throughout the luxurious mini mansion. Erik shook his head as he thought about how Alexis didn’t have a problem risking living like this just to satisfy her selfish needs. She had everything that she ever wanted. Money, cars, the latest fashion, and her hair and nails were always in tip top shape.

Not only that but this house that she could live in full time if she chose to. From the way she would tell them how Shawn was stuck on stupid over her let Erik know that the nigga loved her enough to put up with her and her how shit. There was no way that he was going around town not knowing what his own fiancée was doing. He had to know but just to stupid in love to do anything about it. Erik scoffed to himself never wanting to be that deep in love with someone.

“Aye y’all niggas come up here! I think I got something.” Cane shouted from the top of the banister on the second floor.

Jogging up the stairs, Erik behind Durk, went into the master bedroom. They looked around trying to see why he called them in there.

“Nigga what are we supposed to be looking at?” Durk asked through his mask.

“That’s what I thought when I came in here at first. Nothing looks out of the ordinary but check this out. This some rich shit here.” Going over to the walk in closet Cane pushed aside some of Shawns suits that was hanging up revealing a small red button. When he clicked it the wall slid to the side disappearing.

“You gotta be fuckin kidding me.” Erik whispered to himself.

It was a panic room. Inside the blue neon lit medium sized room was guns holstered against the wall. The ammo inside their cases sat to the side. Erik looked to the right to find that there was some of Shawn’s famous ice pieces laid out on a shelf. All of his most prized possessions was in this room and they had access to all of it. But Erik wasn’t here for that. They had a mission and that was to try and walk out with as much of that money as they can.

“Fuck y’all niggas doing standing around. Get to bagging this shit up.” Durk laughed unzipping his duffel bags.

The money was in a clear casing directly in the middle of the room. It was too much cash to try and fit it all in one duffel bag so they all got three each but it still didn’t look like it would work. Working as fast as they could they were starting to run out of room.

“Durk we don’t have enough bags for this shit.” Cane told him standing up.

Durk looked up at him while placing the stacks in his bags. “So then go run ya ass down to the truck dump it out and come back in here for the rest.” Erik could see that Cane looked confused through his mask. “Now!” Durk yelled.

After the repeated cycle of going back and forth it took them fifteen minutes to gather all of the money. Durk grabbed what he had left and went to the car while Erik and Cane got the rest. To Erik’s surprise everything was going smooth until he seen Cane reach for Shawns jewelry. He knew that it was a bad idea but decided not to say anything. That would be the consequences that Cane would have to deal with and not him.

The sound of the car alarm went off and they immediately ran out of the room and out the house. Throwing the bags in the back Erik hopped back into the car. Moe pulled off once they were safely in. Pulling off his mask he felt Durk slap his shoulder and laughing in celebration as if he just won the lottery.

“With all this money right here. Mufuckas gon be calling me the black Pablo Escobar because I’m bout to take over all of this shit.” Durk laughed smelling the cash.

Erik shook his head. He was glad that it was finally over but deep down inside him he had a terrible feeling that it was the worst decision he ever made.

*Flashback Over*

Erik folded his arms as he jogged his memory of the prior event.“I’ll have to think about it. This some serious shit you asking me Durk. Next level shit.”

Durk smacked his lips. “You always gotta think about some shit instead of doing it. But anyways, I’m doing a lil bash and I want y’all niggas to be there.”

Everyone shook their head agreeing.

“It’s gonna be some bad bitches in there right? I might have to throw on my best walking up in that bitch.” Cane joked around showing off his new Patek Philippe watch.

“I don’t know why you asking. They ain’t gon be worried about ya young broke ass with that pond shop watch you got on.” Durk clowned him rolling his eyes.

Erik smirked watching Cane dismiss him with a wave of his hand. “I’ll be there and I’ma bring a plus one. That’s cool?” Erik asked dapping him up. He seen Cane looking confused at him out the corner of his eye.

“So you done found someone else to get ya dick wet? I thought you was gonna be stuck on that bitch Alexis for a minute.” Durk teased him smiling.

“Fuck you worried about my dick for? Gay ass!” Erik laughed pushing him. “Nah she just a friend. I met her at this bar she work at down from my place. She real cool.” He smiled thinking about Harmony.

“Well I’ll be the judge of that when I meet her. I’ll see you on Saturday.”

The two dapped each other up with a side hug and departed from one another.

__________________________

“You sure your brother ain’t gonna have a problem with you putting on that outfit for tonight.” Kelley question Amiyah as she pulled down the front of her dress.

It was finally Saturday night. The night of the Valentine’s Day bash and it was fifteen minutes after nine. They were running late. Durk had told her make it before that time so that she would be let inside without any complications but of course she didn’t listen. Amiyah was stuck choosing between dresses as the time went by. After finding out that Erik was going to be there she wanted to look her best. She hadn’t seen him in a month and she was going to try and impress him some how.

“Why? Do I look okay? Does it fit my body right?” She rambled the questions as she tried to take off the fifth dress for the night.

Kelley rolled her eyes getting. She was already dressed and ready to pick her up by eight thirty but when she walked in Amiyah’s room she was still in her bra and panties.

“You look fine. I think that this is the one you should actually wear. You look beautiful.” She rested her chin on her opened shoulder giving her a soft smile.

Amiyah glanced at her appearance in her body length mirror. She tugged at the pink tie-dye fashion nova Rustic Root Ruched Mini Dress. Her shoulders were out in the open and her cleavage on full display. She knew that there was no way she would be around her brother tonight. Knowing him he would try to send her back home to change and embarrass her in front of everyone. Amiyah blew out air of frustration while throwing her head back.

“Your not just saying that because I’m taking too long are you?” She squinted her eyes at Kelley.

Kelley giggled. “Yes I am but it do look good now let’s hurry up and go before we don’t get in at all.”

Finishing up her final touches Amiyah did a last sweep over her body before grabbing her coat and heading out with Kelley to her car. The club was a good twenty minutes away but with there barely being any cars out tonight they made it in fifteen. Pulling up to the location Kelley and Amiyah both whispered a “damn” at the scene in front of them.

“Your brother wasn’t lying when he said that he was gon have the whole hood pop out.” Kelley exclaimed as she fortunately found parking.

“I guess he wasn’t.” Amiyah whispered to herself. She was starting to feel self conscious about her choice of clothing all over again. The expression was written on her face.

“Listen let me tell you this. We are about to go up in here and have the best night of our lives. We gon dance, diss any niggas that try to step to us, drink, and get fucked up. Don’t worry about what other people think. They already have an idea of you in their head so why stress yourself trying to change it. Fuck what they think.” Kelley lectured while applying her lip gloss.

Amiyah giggled nodding her head. Her confidence level going up just a bit from the pep talk. She answered her back with a “thank you” as they got out the car. Walking hand and hand, they walked to the front of the line. The music blasting on the inside was clearly audible on the out. Sounds of people complaining could be heard when they reached the bouncer.

“I hate to be the one to tell you beautiful ladies but the end of the line is down there.” The tall and buff light skinned bouncer pointed in the direction.

“Oh see we’re with her brother, the one who’s supposed to be hosting the bash, Durk.” Kelley spoke for them.

He raised an eyebrow looking back and forth between them. “Y’all with Durk?”

They nodded in unison while smiling.

“Yeah well you and everyone else. Now get to the back of my line.” His face stern and unfazed.

“Wait Durk is my brother and he told me to be here early but I was running late. Can you just let us in and I’ll bring him back out here to confirm it.” Amiyah pleaded with her hands folded.

“Girl you not the first one that claimed to be some type of family member of his to get in free. Besides I ain’t never heard about Durk having no sister.” The bouncer eyed her up and down with disbelief.

Amiyah sighed. She didn’t even bother to try and call him because she knew that he wouldn’t be able to hear it over the loud music. She gave Kelley an apologetic look as they started to walked to the end but the sound of someone calling her name stopped her.

“Amiyah?”

Turning around she saw Cane walking up to the front. He was wearing a white Christian Dior newspaper denim jean jacket. Underneath was a plain black Dior shirt and black washed jeans to match. Inhaling a sharp breath, Amiyah forgot about him being one of those included.

“Hey Cane. What are you doing here?” She replied softly. She was embarrassed being seen walking to the back of the line.

“I’m here for the party. Why you not inside?” He asked with a smile.

“The bouncer won’t let us in. He thinks we’re just tryna cut the line.” She shrugged rolling her eyes at the security guy.

Cane laughed catching her action. “Do you not know who the host is to this shit? Your brother, that nigga should be escorting you in.”

Amiyah laughed shaking her head.

“Come on. I got y’all.”

Kelley smirked at her as they folded their arms together walking back to the front. They stood next to Cane watching him speak to the guy.

“Yo Diamond, they with me and this is Durk lil sis. Remember her face and think twice next time before you try and keep her from getting in. Got it?” Cane tapped his shoulder creating space for them to walk pass.

“I got it.” The bouncer mumbled letting them by.

When they made it in it was packed to the max in the venue. There was beautiful women and fine men all through the place. Pop Smokes- Hello bombed through the speakers. Bottle girls danced while holding up Don Julio 1942’s and sparklers in the air. Amiyah was impressed with the turn out. She reached for Kelley as they both of their lips curled up with excitement.

“We bout to be lit as fuck.” Kelley yelled over the music.

Feeling a tap on her shoulder she turned to face Cane. His eyes traveling over her body made her stomach fill up with nerves. “Yeah?”

“VIP is up there. I think your brother would want you to be there.” Cane licked his lips. His eyes couldn’t stop going below her face.

Amiyah nodded. “Okay.” She grabbed Kelley’s hand as he led the way up the stairs.

Spotting her brother, Durk had different girls surrounding him. One was twerking on him while the other two recorded and took shots from the tequila bottles. Amiyah rolled her eyes at the sight. Walking over to him she patted his shoulder trying to get his attention.

“Can I help you?” He snapped his head at her.

Amiyah chuckled noticing he was tipsy but also that he didn’t even recognize her. “Really Derrick you don’t even know your own sister?” She folded her arms.

Pushing the girl who was dancing on him out the way he faced her looking over her. Durks face contorted up confused at her outfit.

“Who are you? Because I know Amiyah ass ain’t come out the house like that-“

“Don’t start Durk you promise.” She cut him off reminding him.

He took off his jacket and pushed it towards her. “Here at least put this on.”

Amiyah laughed pushing it away. “I left mine in the car for a reason. Leave me alone.” She started to walk away but felt him grab her wrist.

“Unh uh I didn’t forget. I told you you was going to stay beside me all night, so have fun.” He went back to letting the girls dance on him.

Kelley looked at him with disgust before turning to her friend. “I’m about to get us a drink from the bar. I’ll be back...maybe.” She stated the last part lowly but Amiyah heard it. She watched her leave the VIP section.

Opening up one of the 1942’s that was on the table Amiyah figured she could get her drink on right here. Tilting her head back she allowed the liquor to go down her throat. She made a sour face shaking her head from the taste. She repeated it giving herself four shots. Amiyah wasn’t much of a drinker so it didn’t take much to get her tipsy. Standing on the couch next to her brother she rocked side to side rapping the lyrics along to the song.

“Amiyah sit ya light weight ass down.” Durk yelled drunkenly towards her.

She waved him off and continued to do her thing. From the way she was standing she had a view of whoever was going to come in the section. She thought it was the liquor playing tricks with her until she saw him take more steps coming up. He was dressed in a two tone knitted Givenchy sweater with black jeans. The blinging from his watch and gold chains around his neck caught her eyes. When he smiled he revealed the gold canines in his mouth. His beard looking freshly moisturized and his waves on swim. His eyes were low which told her that he probably smoke a couple of blunts before coming inside. He looked so good.

Amiyah watched as he greeted everyone in the section with salutes and daps before walking up to her brother who was seated next to her.

“Nigga why the fuck you got to come up here and show me out for my shit?” Durk yelled playfully standing up and boxing him.

Amiyah watched as they interacted with each other. At least her question from earlier was answered. They look like they were still best friends.

“Come on man, this light work.” His voice coming out as smooth as butter.

“Yeah whatever nigga.” Durk turned towards her making her status known. “Miyah you not gon say what’s up to Erik?”

When she heard his name she got butterflies in her stomach. It was like it was her first time meeting him all over again. After a month of not seeing him nothing had changed. Her feelings for him never fading but only enhancing the minute she saw him.

“Hey Erik.” She smiled softly putting the bottle that was in her hand down and stepped off the seat.

Erik nodded his head towards her. “What’s good!” He stated nonchalantly. Amiyah couldn’t deny that she was hurt from the tone in his voice. He didn’t even smile at her, only just a nod. But yet they kept eye contact with each other.

“So where she at? I’m trying to meet this “friend”.” Durk asked doing the quotation marks with his fingers.

Amiyah stood to the side confused hearing her brother over the loud music. She didn’t realize that there was a small petite woman standing somewhat behind Erik until her brother mentioned the word ‘she’. She watched as Erik held her hand pulling her in front of him. His arms wrapped around her waist pulling her into him as he rocked them side to side lightly.

“This is my friend Harmony. Harmony this is my best friend and brother Durk.” Erik smiled introducing them. Amiyah felt a sting when he didn’t even bother to introduce her.

She laughed holding her hand out to shake his. “Hi it’s nice to finally meet you. I heard a lot about you Durk.”

Amiyah observed Harmony. She was beautiful. Nice brown skin complexion, pretty hair that looked natural like it was hers, her outfit hugged her coke bottle shape. She had the perfect breast to hips and ass ratio. Her waist barely existing. Amiyah took note of everything. Everything that she dreamed to be but wasn’t. Sadness clouded over her face as she watched them embrace each other.

“Well I hope he told you only good things. But fuck all that you are beautiful ma. I don’t know how you ended up with this ugly ass nigga.” Durk joked around.

Erik gave him a straight face before laughing. “Fuck outta here. So what’s up where the drinks at? You know I need my shit.”

Durk nodded his head going to the table and grabbed his personal bottle of Hennessy and handing it to him. “Drink up!”

Amiyah watched him crack open his bottle and drunk it down like it was water. The little action reminding her of the time when she was at his condo and how he sipped on the bitter drink before showing her the crazy things he could do with his tongue. Amiyah bit her inner cheek grabbing her own bottle and throwing it back two more times.

“Damn girl you can drink.” She heard a light voice laugh. Turning her head while wiping her mouth she saw that it was Harmony.

Amiyah smiled shyly. “I’m just tryna turn up while I can.” Her words a little slurred.

“I’m Harmony. I came with Erik.” Harmony held her hand out again.

Amiyah glanced at it quickly before shaking it. “Amiyah.”

“That’s a pretty name. Are you Durks girl?” She asked genuinely.

Amiyah scrunched her face up doing a fake puke. “Uh no that’s my brother. I came here with him and my friend who’s somewhere around here.”

Harmony laughed holding her fist up to her mouth. She shook her head. “I’m sorry I just saw you standing up here next to him that’s all. Erik didn’t tell me he had a sister.”

“It’s okay.” Amiyah turned her direction towards Erik who was sipping on his bottle while listening to whatever Durk was telling him in his ear. Once again she was hurt when Harmony told her that she didn’t know about her.

For the rest of the night she remained in same spot. Babysitting the area. Kelley came back a few times trying to get her to sneak away but she didn’t want to. Her mood was ruined every time she would look in their direction to find Harmony grinding on Erik and him standing there catching what she was throwing. So she drunk her bottle and danced next to her brother who would wrap his arm over her shoulder as they rapped to whatever song was playing.

In the mist of the party Amiyah saw Erik whisper something to Harmony before getting up to leave the section. She figured she could use this chance to find him and talk to him. To see how he was doing. To get him to look at her the way he used to. Anything to be near him.

“I’m going to the bathroom.” Amiyah shouted to her brother who only nodded his head drinking out of her bottle.

Walking out the section she bumped and squeeze passed the bodies. She didn’t have a clue where he went. She thought she could catch up with him but with a crowd like the one that was in there tonight it was hopeless. Amiyah gave up trying to search for his frame over the party goers. She strolled to the back hall that held the bathrooms. Going inside the music level dimmed down making it easy to hear if someone was to have a conversation back here.

Dragging her fingers across the wall, her head stayed down not paying attention to what was in front of her causing her to bump into someone.

“Damn my bad.” His deep voice spoke lowly.

Looking up, it was Erik. His eyes were low and going over her body as he stroked his beard.

“It’s o-okay.” Her words becoming a stutter.

Erik nodded his head. She looked tipsy to him or maybe even drunk. He never seen her in this state so it was hard for him to decipher. But Erik knew that he couldn’t leave her alone like this. He wanted to make sure that she was okay.

“You good? You look a lil fucked up.” He spoke bluntly.

“I’m fine. I didn’t have that much.” Amiyah replied. She was tipsy but still was aware of what she was doing.

“I could wait until your finished in the bathroom. We could walk back together.” Erik shoved his hands in his pockets.

Amiyah leaned on the wall with her hands behind her back. “I don’t think your girlfriend would like the sight of us coming back at the same time.”

He smirked as his jaw clenched. “You worried about her when all I’m trying to do is make sure you make it back safe. I don’t want none of these weird ass niggas trying shit. But you thinking about Harmony.” He shook his head as he leaned against the other wall directly in front of her.

“I’m just saying she might get the wrong idea-“

“She’s not my girl.” Erik spoke up cutting her sentence.

Amiyah rolled her eyes and scoffed. “You told me that the last time.” She mumbled knowing he could hear.

Erik’s faces scrunched up. “What’s it to you? Why does it matter if she’s my girl or not?” His arms now folded.

“Because I just find it funny how quick you moved on that fast.” Amiyah snapped looking him up and down.

Erik chuckled. “But wasn’t it you that broke up with me? So I don’t get how you could be hurt by the fact that I’m moving on and you stuck.”

“No Erik I’m hurt at the fact that you act like nothing happened between us.” She was gaining her liquid courage when she stepped in his face. “And how you can just bring her here to meet my brother but not have the decency to even look my way.”

Erik sucked in his bottom lip watching her express herself. “Still don’t know what that got to do with you.” He shrugged.

He was just as hurt as she was. His feelings for her were still raw and there but he wanted to make her feel the same way he felt when she ended it with him. When Erik introduce Harmony to Durk and not Amiyah he did it on purpose. The way he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her body close to his was on purpose. The way he let her dance on him in front of her was on purpose. He could feel her stares on them. Erik was hurt and he wanted her to know what he was feeling.

Amiyah scoffed shaking her head. “What is it about her that’s so special? What? The fact that you can fuck her without having to worry about her crazy ass brother finding out about it. That’s why you’re fucking her?”

Erik chuckled. “How would you know if I’m fucking her or not?”

“For you to be some drug dealer you sure are a fucking coward Erik!” Amiyah pushed his chest but he caught her by the wrist.

“I told you I’m not a fucking drug dealer and for someone to not ride dick...you sure are riding mine. Why you worried about who I’m fucking if you ain’t the fucking me?” Erik’s words were hard.

Amiyah stared at him. “I hate you.” She mumbled looking at his lips trying to free herself.

Erik backed her into the wall. He put her hands above her head and interlocking their fingers as he looked down at her and towered over her body. “Fuck you say to me?”

“I said I hate you-“

Her words were cut off with his lips connecting to hers. His hold left her hands and his arms wrapped around her waist. Traveling down to her ass he cupped both cheeks firmly. Erik felt his dick jump when she moaned into his mouth . Her tongue gliding with his as he felt the warmth of it overtaking his body. It’s been over a month since he felt her lips. Erik’s heart was beating fast knowing that it was risky to be making out with Durks sister and how anyone could walk in and see them. But he couldn’t stop and didn’t want to.

Amiyah moaned as she held his face bringing him impossibly closer than what he already was. She could taste the Hennessy off of his tongue mixed with her tequila. She was putting everything that she was feeling into this kiss. She wanted him to know that she missed him and wanted to start over. She didn’t mean it when she said that she hated him. With the alcohol and emotions getting in the way she wanted to say anything to keep him by her.

Erik pulled away with a tug of her lower lip and placed a soft peck on it. He cursed at himself for falling weak for her once again. No matter how much space they had away from each other she was always able to pull him in.

“What is it about her that I’m not?” Amiyah interrupted his thoughts. She tried to stop herself from asking the question but she wanted to know.

Erik sighed putting his forehead against hers. “You gotta learn how to stop questioning yourself when it comes to these other females. Your beautiful ma. Stop that shit.” He gave her one last kiss on the top of her head as he left her standing there alone going back to the party.

“Okay.” Amiyah whispered to herself.

__________________________________________

Please excuse any mistakes!

Tag-List

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[eyeofthedrgn]

A Heavy Battle Symphony Chapter 14

Trigger warning: language, mental abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, violence, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, self harm, self-esteem issues, sexual abuse (only alluded to briefly in future chapters), drinking (comes up late in the story) just a lot of trauma, angst, smut

Word count: 3407

Chapter 14 - Sharp Edges

Sharp edges have consequences

I guess that I had to find out for myself

Sharp edges have consequences

Now every scar is a story I can tell

His mother was staring at him in disbelief.

"What the fuck was that, Rowan?"

He blinked at his mother, she had never cursed at him before.

"What do you mean?" He got defensive. "I think I'm allowed to be upset if my boyfriend doesn't tell me what he's been up to for the last, however long."

His mother's eyebrows shot into her hair. "Wow, Rowan. Wow."

She grabbed her box from the bag and left Rowan to stew in the living room.

---

Lorcan was laying on his floor, bleeding on an old towel. He was finally numb after a couple hours. All he could feel was the sting in his arms. His head was a little fuzzy.

There was a knock on the door.

"Lor, can we talk? Please?"

Lorcan closed his eyes and ignored the man he had been wanting to see for months. Things weren't going the way they were supposed to. So much for being proud of himself.

++++

It was the next day and Rowan still didn't understand what the big deal had been yesterday. He hadn't seen Lorcan all day and he was getting frustrated. Rowan was only here for a week and they were wasting time over this.

So, Rowan called Aelin. He needed to vent. He didn't feel like he was being unreasonable. But apparently, he was being an asshole. Aelin cussed him out and told him he was a stupid shit. Aelin had gotten Elide on the line, and she also ripped Rowan a new one.

"If I were there, I would slap you. You are ridiculous. Lorcan found a hobby using your dad's old tools and made you something. He wanted to surprise you and your mom. Why on earth do you think you have any right to be mad at him?! Lorcan probably thought he was being sweet! And for the record, he was!" With Aelin defending him, Rowan knew he was in the wrong, but he still wasn’t grasping why. He was pacing in his room.

"Yeah, Ro. I did that with Manon, I learned how to crochet without her knowing and made her a scarf. She was so excited when I gave it to her." Elide sighed. "Rowan, what made you so upset anyway?"

"Fuck, I don't know. It made me feel like I don't know him.” He ran his hand through his hair as he continued his pacing. “That he could just do so much without me knowing."

"Are you saying you don't trust him?"

"What? No!"

Silence.

"Really, guys?"

"Well.." Elide was holding something back.

Aelin chimed in, "He's been through hell, he's only ever felt safe around you. He went to you when he got out of the hospital after he almost died!" The last word was overly emphasized. "Can't you understand that he probably just wanted to feel confident in something before he told you about it. He probably didn't want to be hounded about his progress. This is the first thing he's done for himself, Rowan! Let him have this thing!" She was basically yelling at him at the end.

He didn't know what to say. Especially since Aelin was on Lorcan’s side. She hadn't ever really liked the boy.

"You are being selfish."

He was. Fucking Hel.

"You're right. You're right. Gods damn it. I need to go."

They both said bye and hung up.

He walked over to Lorcan's door again.

"Love?" He knocked. Nothing. "I was an asshole. A selfish asshole. Can we please talk?"

He heard the bathroom door behind him open and turned to see Lorcan behind him. He was wearing one of his ratty old hoodies that had been too big for him before and a pair of sweats. His face was blank, not a hint of emotion.

"You're a prick." He pushed past Rowan and shut his door in his face.

He stared at the door. "I guess I deserved that."

His mother walked by him to the stairwell carrying a basket of laundry. "Give him some time and maybe cool off a bit more yourself. Come help me with lunch."

He looked back at Lorcan's door with a sigh as he followed his mother to the kitchen.

---

Lorcan laid curled up in bed. His stomach growled, but he ignored it. After rebandaging himself, he had found Rowan at his door. The desire to filet his arm flooded his mind. He just called Rowan a prick and shut himself away again. He couldn't handle it right now.

It felt like all the progress he made was just reversed. Here he was floating yet again in his own ocean of despair.

There was a soft knock on his door that interrupted his thoughts. "Lorcan, dear?" It was Barb. "I brought you some food."

He got up and opened the door. She gave him a sad smile.

"Can I have a hug?" His voice was no more than a whisper.

"Of course, love." She hugged him and he cried on her shoulder. Her hand made soothing circles on his back.

They stayed like that for a while. Lorcan finally pulled away, wiping his face with his sleeve, he said, "I'm sorry I got your shirt wet."

"Nonsense. Come here." She shut Lorcan's door and went to sit on the edge of his bed. Patting the spot beside her. Lorcan obeyed, looking at his hands on his lap.

"Rowan has had trust issues for most of his life. The few boyfriend's he's had have cheated on him or ghosted him. So, I assume he thinks that since you didn't tell him about this, that you won't tell him other things." Lorcan's brow furrowed. "You had every right to keep your new hobby a surprise. Rowan overreacted. Sometimes, he's a little selfish." She gave his knee a squeeze.

Lorcan thought back to Solstice break when Rowan tried moving too fast for him. He sighed. Selfish indeed.

"I know you're upset, love. But I do think you two should talk. He's only here for a week."

Barb got up and left. The door clicked shut.

++++

Rowan didn't know what to do. Lorcan wasn't talking to him, he had already done some chores and worked out for an hour. So now, he was standing in the kitchen stealing cookie dough out of the bowl.

His mother hit his hand as he went for more dough. "Out! I'm tired of your moping! I don't want to see you again until you two make up! Go!" She shooed him and his semi-permanent frown away.

He decided to go outside. The fresh air should do him good. He wandered around the backyard. The trees were blossoming, the flowers were blooming. It was a beautiful sunny spring day, but he felt hollow.

After several minutes, he found himself in front of his dad's shop. The light was on and the door was cracked. Pushing open the door, he found Lorcan hunched over a piece of wood with a carving chisel and mallet in his hands. He had headphones on, completely oblivious to the world around him.

Lorcan blew on the work in front of him and wood chips flew. The chisel met the wood again. Rowan just watched him work for a while. It was relaxing. His boyfriend looked like he belonged here. Honestly, it reminded him of his father. Gods he had been so fucking stupid yesterday.

Waiting until Lorcan was brushing away wood chips, he knocked on the door frame. Lorcan looked up. His lips pressed into a thin line. Any emotion he had had while carving, left his face the moment their eyes met. It made Rowan’s heart drop to his stomach.

"Hey," Rowan said tentatively.

Lorcan just set the chisel and mallet down then took his headphones off after tapping the pause button on his phone, and set them next to his work. He lowered his eyes. It hurt that Lorcan didn't even want to look at him. Rowan took a deep breath as he took a couple steps into the shop.

"I'm a huge fucking selfish asshole. I was stupid and immature and wasn't thinking of you. Aelin, Elide, and Mom told me I was an idiot. And they're right. You were right to call me a prick. I let my insecurities get to me. I had a gut reaction to assume that maybe I wouldn't be able to trust you in the future if you were going to keep things from me. But I realize that I'm being stupid. Aelin ripped me a new one for thinking that as did Elide. And I totally deserve it.” He took another deep breath.

"Honestly, I don't feel like I deserve your forgiveness. But I hope-" He swallowed, pausing for a moment to gather his thoughts. "I love you and I'm so fucking sorry." Tears were falling down his cheeks now, Lorcan always made him more emotional than he felt he should be. Lorcan still sat frozen, staring at the workbench. Rowan roughly wiped his tears away before continuing. "I really am proud of you for finding something you enjoy and those boxes you made.. they're fucking gorgeous." He wiped his tears again and sighed.

It felt like ages before it looked like Lorcan would acknowledge him. But then, he shifted and Rowan saw the white knuckles of his fists. He was obviously digging his nails into his palms. Rowan wondered how often he did that.

"I'm-" Lorcan took a deep shaky breath. "I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel right now." He finally looked up at Rowan, his eyes were shiny with tears. "Do you trust me or not? Because if you don't.." His face started to crumple.

"I trust you. I trust you with my life." Rowan's feet finally moved forward, his heart breaking at the hurt on Lorcan's face. "I just let my past relationships control my feelings yesterday. And I'm so sorry. You are nothing like any of my past boyfriends. Nothing. You are the best thing that has happened to me, Lor. I promise." Rowan hoped to the gods that Lorcan believed him. He really wanted to touch Lorcan, but wasn't sure if it would be welcomed.

There was a long pause. The silence was deafening.

Lorcan just nodded. "Do you want to see what I'm working on?"

Rowan sighed in relief and nodded. He knew that was Lorcan's way of forgiving him. Lorcan had never been good with verbalizing words.

The rest of the afternoon he watched Lorcan work. It was really nice hanging out in the shop again, though it made him a little sad that he wasn't watching his father work. He was amazed at the talent that his lover had after only a few months. Lorcan was working on an intricate Celtic knot carving. The way he held the chisel and the small mallet, the way his muscles moved on his forearms, the way his… scars. So many scars. Rowan’s eyes roved over the dozens upon dozens of scars across both of his forearms.

Rowan felt like Lorcan forgot he was here. He had pushed up his sleeves. He never pushes up his sleeves. And now he knew why. How had he not noticed them when they were intimate? The insides of his arms were covered in scars and there were matching bandages on both. Fuck.

Tears instantly welled in Rowan's eyes. His throat tightened, so his voice was higher than it usually was. "Lor?"

Lorcan jumped. He had definitely lost himself in his work. He slowly set the chisel and mallet down. Looking at his arms, he realized what was happening. He pulled his sleeves down and over his hands. He started trembling, he wouldn't look at him. Rowan set his hand on the table in front of Lorcan, palm up, inviting him to stay, to trust him.

---

He wasn't ready for this.

Lorcan had lost himself in his work. It was so easy for him to do. He liked working with his sleeves pushed up, the fabric got in the way otherwise. But he forgot Rowan was there. And now, Rowan knew. He knew. Lorcan wanted to disappear.

Now what? Rowan wasn't running away from him, if anything he was asking him not to run away. Rowan had set his hand on the table, palm up, waiting. Patient.

He was shaking. He released a shaky breath as he grasped the hand waiting on the table. Rowan finally breathed. They just stayed there for several minutes.

Rowan finally broke the silence, "When?" He must have been talking about the bandages. Lorcan dropped his head in shame and embarrassment. He had let his emotions run high and take over last night. He hadn't thought, he just did.

"Did I-" he sucked in a breath. Rowan's voice shook, "I caused those… Oh, gods, Lorcan. I'm so fucking sorry." Rowan's hand tightened and his other hand covered his face as he did his best to hold in his sobs.

Lorcan turned to him, shocked that Rowan blamed himself. He stood and wrapped his arms around Rowan's shoulders, pulling them tight together.

His voice was quiet, "Hey." Lorcan reached up a hand to gently pull Rowan's away so he could see his face. "Hey. Rowan, please don't blame yourself. I let my emotions take over last night. I'm sorry." He placed a kiss on his forehead. "It's not your fault."

"Yes it is." His eyes were so sad. It made his heart ache. "It is. It is." They rested their foreheads against each other. "Can you forgive me? I.. I feel like complete and utter shit. Gods, you shouldn't forgive me. I- fuck.." Rowan's eyes shuttered and tears fell.

Lorcan just wanted him to stop talking. He knew Rowan was sorry, he knew it wasn't Rowan's fault. All he wanted was for Rowan to be happy, that's why he made the damn box in the first place. But right now, he wasn't sure how to fix it. He was terrible at talking. So, he just did what he would want.

He kissed him. Softly. He tried to put his emotions into it, to let Rowan know that everything would be okay. Everything would work out. They would work out because there was no one else for Lorcan.

A moment passed when Rowan didn't return the kiss and Lorcan felt his heart sink, but then he was being pushed up against the wall, open mouthed kisses pressed to his lips. The passion emanating off of Rowan felt like he could reach out and touch it.

They were just a tangle of tongue and lips, hands everywhere, anywhere. Moans and whimpers, their names said as prayers.

Rowan moved to Lorcan's neck and he leaned his head to the side to give the man more access. He needed Rowan. The last two days had been Hel. Lorcan had missed him so much. Having felt so far away from his lover even though they were in the same house was killing him.

Lorcan rolled his hips against Rowan's and the glorious sound that rumbled against his neck, oh, he wanted to bottle it and save it for later.

"Rowan, please." He didn't know what he was asking for. He just wanted more.

Rowan stopped, he whined. His lover's hands cupped his face, looking into his eyes. "Lorcan Salvaterre, I love you more than anything in this world. And I am so incredibly sorry that I caused you pain. And I am so amazingly grateful that you still want to be with me and have me in your life."

Lorcan pressed a soft kiss to Rowan's swollen lips. And another. "You are mine." And with that Lorcan claimed his mouth. His fingers curled into silver hair.

++++

"You are mine."

Rowan's toes curled at the authority in Lorcan's voice. He was at Lorcan's mercy. Somehow, he was against the wall now. Strong fingers were tangled in his hair, their tongues clashed as Lorcan fought for dominance. Rowan let him have it.

As he exposed his neck, it was covered in kisses and licks, grazed by teeth. He shivered, it felt like he couldn't breathe. Lorcan's hands were slow as they caressed his body. They wandered under his shirt, brushed against his nipples, he gasped. Then, they slowly moved down. Down. Farther.

There was the softest caress at the hardness in his shorts. He moaned loudly as Lorcan pressed his hand against him. He sucked in a breath and held it as he rocked his hips against his lover's hand.

He felt Lorcan smile against his neck before an open mouthed kiss was pressed to his burning flesh. "Lor.. love, please."

Lorcan's hand moved up, causing a whine to escape his lips at the lack of contact. But then, strong, calloused fingers slid under his waistband. He paused, a question. "Please."

His hand touched bare skin no one had ever touched before. And it felt so right for it to be Lorcan. He didn't go straight to his cock and that frustrated him, until he realized Lorcan was relishing in the feeling of his skin.

Dextrous fingers fluttered over his hip. Was he breathing? After those beautiful fingers had taken their time memorizing his hip, they then skated slowly down his Adonis belt to where he needed him.

"I love you, Lor."

---

Lorcan's nose brushed up his neck and then he breathed on his ear. "I love you, Rowan." He gripped the hardened, velvety flesh of his lover and watched as his head fell back against the wall as he groaned. His thumb caressed the head of Rowan's cock and hips thrust forward on their own.

"You're so soft." A smile in his voice. Rowan whimpered and melted into Lorcan at his words. "You feel good in my hand." Lorcan claimed Rowan's lips and he stroked the man at his mercy, slow at first, taking his time, enjoying how the taut skin felt against his fingers. Enjoying the noises coming from the glorious silver haired man pressed to the wall in front of him. His green eyes were blown wide with lust. He was sure his looked the same.

He quickened his pace. But only enough to push him just to the edge. Lorcan had been rocking his own hips against Rowan's thigh. He wanted them to come together. And he wanted Rowan's touch to bring him to climax.

He whispered against Rowan's lips, "Touch me." Shock flitted over his face, Lorcan just nodded.

Warm hands gently found his waistband and brushed his skin, he closed his eyes and dropped his head to Rowan's shoulder. He stopped all other movements to focus on Rowan's first touches. Fingers wrapped around him and he let out a guttural moan, it was almost primal. This feeling was nothing like what he thought it would be. It was so much better. He felt Rowan's cock twitch in his hand and he almost was undone right there.

Rowan placed a kiss on his temple and slowly started stroking him.

"Ro. Rowan." His name was just a breath of air as it left his lips.

He started his ministrations back up and brought his lips to Rowan's. After several heated moments, they broke the kiss, foreheads together. They were both close.

"Lor, come for me. I love you so much, I want you to come in my hand."

They were breathing heavily.

Lorcan managed a chuckle as he said, "Only if you come in my hand, love." He pumped his hand faster. "Come for me." Rowan's eyes rolled back and he started spasming as he crashed over that edge. Watching and feeling his love in front of him coming in his grip had him finding his own release shortly after. They milked each other until they were both spent and trembling.

Lorcan collapsed against Rowan. It felt like he just ran a marathon. His legs shook and he couldn't get enough air into his lungs. But fucking Hellas was that worth it. Rowan’s hand on him felt so much better than his own.

He pressed several, slow chaste kisses to his lover's mouth.

"That was.."

"Yeah." Lorcan was on cloud nine. "Yeah." He buried his face in his lover's neck and inhaled the scent of home.

____

Thanks for reading!

@thenerdandfandoms @starlightorstarfire @tanvee1231

[nuttystrawberrysalad]

All About Knitted Hats

Quarantine has sparked plenty of new at-home hobbies. Maybe you picked up a paintbrush and tapped into your inner artist. Or, you might have transformed your kitchen into a bakery. For some, perfecting their knitting and crocheting skills even led to a business — which is why you're likely seeing the knit hat trend unexpectedly taking off on Instagram.

For Delsy Gouw, founder of Brooklyn-based label Its Memorial day, crocheting started out as a fun activity. "[It] originally started as an online Depop vintage shop [in 2019] but when Covid hit, I wasn’t able to source any goods," she tells TZR. "I also lost my job and found myself with a lot of time on my hands." Gouw picked up the old hobby of hers and began making items for friends, and then her friends' friends were requesting pieces, too. She then began crafting knit hats because she believed the demand was there. "I started with bags but when I posted them so many of my friends and followers asked when or if I’d be open to making hats and taking customs for hats," Gouw tells TZR. While trends typically fade away and come back later on, Gouw hopes this style will stay long-term. "[I] can’t speak for knitting, but the way crochet is done is truly so intricate, unique, and is made to last," she explains. "Crochet can only be done by hand so I think there is something special about having an accessory that is unique and handmade." Fans of Gouw's emerging brand include influencers like Reese Blutstein, Jo Rosenthal, and Ella Emhoff.

Who knows when the first person decided to put something over their head to keep it warm, but knitters know that knitted hats for women are some of the most fun and easy things to knit.

When they’re worked in the round there is little in the way of shaping, except when you get to the crown.

Most hats are worked from the bottom up, with stitches cast-on and worked in a snug stitch pattern such as ribbing, or in stockinette for a rolled bring hat, using a smaller size needle than is used for the head portion of the hat.

In many hat patterns, the hat is worked straight for the desired length of the crown, then nearly all of the stitches are evenly decreased over the course of just a few rounds.

The yarn is cut, the tail threaded through the remaining stitches, pulled tight, and fastened off to the inside of the hat.

The hat can be topped with a pom pom, i-cord, tassel, or whatever embellishment strikes your fancy.

A great book for learning to make hats is Ann Budd’s Handy Book of Patterns, from which some of the material on this page is excerpted. There are chapters on basic hats as well as the type of hats called “tams.”

There are several types of hats, but the most popular knitted hats for men are beanie-type caps, tams (sometimes called “berets”), slouch hats, earflap hats, and tuques.

Beanies: These hats can be super simple or dressed up with a lace or cable patterns. In cooler climates, they’re wonderful gifts for knitters to make.

Tams/Berets: There are so many different stitch patterns to use in this style. Tams and berets can be plain stockinette or intricate Fair Isle. This style of hat is really flattering on just about every face shape, too.

Earflap Hats: These hats are popular in cold climates. They’re great for keeping ears warm and they’re fun to knit. The knitters of Peru specialize in these hats, as shown in the photo at right.

Often a knitted hats for children will have a finished size that is smaller than the average adult head. That’s because hats meant to fit closely at the brim need a bit of negative ease to help them fit snugly and keep them on the head.

The amount of negative ease refers to the difference between the finished size of the object and the size of body part on which it will be worn. A hat that measures 19″ (48.5 cm) around and is worn on a 22″ (56 cm) head has 3″ (7.5 cm) of negative ease.

A beret-type hat might have negative ease at the brim, but a few inches of positive ease in the body of the hat. The extra fabric is what creates its loose, flowing shape, while the tighter brim keeps it fitted to the head.

Hats are a natural for circular knitting (or knitting in the round). This project for circular-knit adult hats offers three brim styles: hemmed, ribbed, and rolled stockinette. Whichever brim you choose, the directions call for shaping the top. Work this hat in plain stockinette stitch in a colorful or fashion yarn, or customize it by working the colorwork pattern included here. But don’t feel tied to those two options — use this hat as a canvas to express yourself.

If you knit the hat on one 16-inch circular needle, you’ll need to switch to double-pointed needles (or one of the other methods) at some point during the crown decreases because the stitches will no longer reach comfortably around the needle. It is easiest to knit hats using the magic-loop method with one long circular needle.

Choose a size

Determine the circumference you want for the hat. Most hats should be knit with negative ease (. Measure around the widest part of the intended wearer’s head and subtract 1⁄2 to 1-1⁄2 inches from that measurement to calculate the hat circumference.

A hemmed brim is not as stretchy as a rolled or ribbed brim, so it’s best not to include too much negative ease when using this hem.

Choose yarn and determine the gauge

Yarn for adult hats can run the gamut from practical to frivolous and fun. If you want a warm winter hat, for example, choose a yarn that is warm and durable, and knit it at a tighter gauge than recommended on the ball band. This results in a denser fabric that better retains heat. If, on the other hand, you are creating a fun accessory, you might choose a fashion yarn that adds a little flair. Because this hat is such a simple shape, it’s a great way to show off variegated or self-striping yarns.

To keep cool but stay warm during winter, you can’t skimp on great outerwear or outfit-making boots. The same goes for cold-weather accessories too: Because for the majority of the season, coats, boots, and, in this case, winter hats do most of the talking when it comes to bundling up while keeping things stylish. In order to break free from your standard winter-outfit formulas—and to keep your looks from looking like, well, everybody else—consider accessorizing functionally and fashionably this season. Here, find four headwear trends not to be missed, and shop 24 of the best winter hats, inspired by the most stylish women on the streets, from New York to Paris.

Buckets and Beyond

After runway debuts at Fendi and Loewe, the winter-ready hand knitted hat took over the streets last February—and this season the ’90s trend has continued to gain momentum. From shaggy faux furs to fuzzy angoras, from shearling to sherpa styles, the winter bucket hat is one of the cutest and coziest accessories of the season.

The ribbed-knit beanie has earned its place as a winter style staple for everyone from downtown urbanites to alpine skiers. New Yorkers might prefer sleek styles in a neutral color palette like black and speckled gray. Meanwhile, a pop of color would bring the perfect amount of joyous street-style-inspired Scandi chic to any drab winter look. And for those who wish to channel a bit of après-ski flair in their daily commute, look no further than one with a floppy, fluffy pom-pom.

The trapper hat is no longer just for the rugged outdoorsman or Elmer Fudd. Not convinced? The trapper has been deemed stylish enough for even the Parisians—in fact a black faux-fur version was spotted on the streets topping off a geometric-print coat, leather pants, and blue ankle booties for the ultimate in warmth and style. Et voilà! Not to mention everyone from classic winter-weather brands to It labels are backing the trapper trend—Heurueh, Kule, and R13 to name just a few. You heard it here first: The trapper is the ultimate winter hat for women this season.

On the tiny Peruvian island of Taquile, a man's worth isn't measured in his ability to hunt or fish, but in his ability to knit.

Alejandro Flores Huatta was born on the 1,300-person island, which is located on the Peruvian side of Lake Titicaca, a three-hour boat ride from the nearest city of Puno. The 67-year-old learned how to knit the iconic chullo (a tall, floppy Andean hat) as a child, with his older brother and grandfather teaching him by using the thorns of a cactus as knitting needles.

"Most of the people learn by looking, watching. Because I don't have a father, my older brother [and grandfather] taught me to knit. So by watching, I learned little by little," he said, speaking through a Quechua translator.

Taquile is famous for its textiles and clothing, and while women weave and tend to the sheep that provide the wool, men are the ones who exclusively produce the island's knitting cap for baby. The chullos are seen as culturally significant, playing a key role in the island's social structure and allowing men to show their creativity while also displaying their marital status, dreams and aspirations – some men even use it to show their mood. It's a tradition that islanders are working hard to preserve.

Residents were relatively cut off from the mainland until the 1950s, and the island's isolation has helped to keep its heritage and way of life intact. Locals abide by the Inca code of "Ama sua, ama llulla, ama qhilla", (Quechua for, "Do not steal, do not lie, do not be lazy"). Taquileans are farmers traditionally; the six island communities take turns to rotate crops of potato, corn, beans and barley in terraces on the mountainsides. They raise sheep, guinea pigs, chickens and pigs on the land and fish in the lake. Tourism kicked off in the 1970s, giving locals a source of income with tens of thousands of visitors drawn to the island annually to tour the villages and surrounding lake. Visitors typically stay with locals in humble, family-run accommodations; lend a hand-harvesting crops; try local specialties like fried trout and potatoes with rice, beans and mint tea; and purchase the island's famous handmade textiles.

Hats reveal men's marital status, dreams and aspirations

In 2005, Taquile's textile art was deemed so valuable that Unesco deemed it an Intangible Cultural Heritage of Humanity. Alejandro is one of the seven men on the island recognised as a Master of Textiles, along with the island's president, Juan Quispe Huatta.

The tradition has been around for the better part of 500 years, with roots in the ancient civilisations of the Inca, Pukara and Colla peoples. The Inca in particular, used their headdresses in a similar way to the Taquilean chullo, to display the specific insignia of their particular province – but that’s where the similarities end. The Taquilean chullo and the Inca headdresses look vastly different. The elders of the island tell of the chullo design arriving with the Spanish conquest in 1535, and Alejandro's grandfather passed on stories of the early conquerors wearing similar hats that were white with ear covers, "but not the same patterns or symbols," Alejandro said.

[pixieungerstories]

The Captive - 8

Ben was snoring slightly in the other bedroom.  He hadn’t let Elly even change the slightly musty sheets, just taken the offered water and aspirin before he climbed in and passed out.  Elly was curled up in bed with an 1890’s treatise about the drafting of patterns for ladies undergarments.  It was weird and obscure and highly recommended by a history blog she followed.  Bernie was right, it was much more interesting than you would expect.

She heard George moving around down there.  The door to the stairs opened and closed then the house went still and quiet. Elly found herself staring at the opposite wall and straining her ears to pick up any sounds that were not Ben.

The only other sound in the house was a soft shuffling from the attic.

Elly jumped out of bed and turned the light on in her room.  Then the one in the bathroom on too.  She pulled out her phone and put on an audio book then hunkered down and pulled the covers up to her chin.  She tried to concentrate on the idea of crocheting an afgan or some fool thing the ladies were always after her to try.  Something to take her mind off of it.

She wasn’t sure that would actually help.

There was a monster in the basement and the distinct possibility that she would die a fiery death.  God only knew what the hell was going on in the attic.  It would be nice to be out of the yarn business, but she really wanted to be out of the whole damn house.  It wasn’t even like there was anyone she could talk to about this.  There wasn’t exactly a ‘there’s a mythical beast in my basement’ facebook group she could join.

Maybe she could at least talk to Ben now.  If he remembered in the morning.  If he didn’t just run screaming.  Not that she could blame him.

In theory, she could just go.  Pack up her bag, head out in the morning and be on a flight around the world before he even missed her.  But then what? A sister or cousin might be sent in her place.  George might also get angry and hurt someone.  Elly didn’t really want that on her conscience.  Especially after that threat display at Ben.  It had worked.  She did feel threatened.

The lights flickered.  Elly got up and started pacing.  Tea!  Or warm milk maybe.  She had a good recipe for warm milk that was very nearly a drinkable pudding.  And it would give her something to fuss over while she tried to relax.  The problem with knowing about George was that it made it really hard to tell yourself that ghosts aren't real and you had just dreamed the shadowy figure standing over your bed.

Elly shivered, then whirled to look behind her.

She hadn’t ever seen the thing when she was clearly awake, but she had woken up to see it standing over her bed a few times now.  Was Ben safe?  Was she?  

Elly turned to look behind her again.  The problem was, there was no matter which way she faced, there was always a blind spot behind her.  Finally she just accepted that she wouldn’t be sleeping tonight and went downstairs to clean the kitchen.  Ben wasn’t going to want to do that with a hangover in the morning.

----

It was after midnight and Elly had not only cleaned the kitchen, she had dusted the shop and had a hard look at her inventory.  If she sold off the looms and spinning wheels, she could start by converting that section to books.  Starting with knitting books, so she could sneak up on people.  Then add baking and cook books, that would be a natural progression from having the bakery on site.  

She could, possibly, just keep expanding the books and reducing the yarn.  Maybe keep the sock yarn.  It was the best seller and could eventually fit in the craft section.

“Elly?”  She jumped, then turned to see George watching her from the bakery.  “I brought you a gift.”

She blinked, “That’s nice.  Thank you George.”

“You have to come get her.”

“Whoa!  Wait!  Her?”  Elly asked

George held out his hand.  Cradled in his palm was a small black kitten.

“Where did you get a kitten?”  Elly demanded, rushing forward to take the sleeping bundle of fur.

“Someone has been killing cats.  They got the mom and the rest of the litter.  This one was hiding in the dark.   Keep her safe.  Don’t let her outside.”

Elly hesitated, “When you say killing cats …” she trailed off.  George was glaring at the wall like it had personally offended him.  In her hands. The kitten yawned and stretched, its tiny razor sharp claws pricking at Elly’s hands.  It blinked up and mewed piteously.   Elly stared into its eyes.  “I’ve never seen a cat with brown eyes before.  Gold or amber, sure, but not like this.”

George turned back to look at her, “The mother was black with white feet, the other kittens were black and white.  Whoever did this was gone before I got there.”

The kitten started to squirm awkwardly and Elly rushed over to set her on the stack of newspapers she was throwing out.  They barely made it. By the time she got things cleaned up, George was gone.  Elly sighed and looked down at kitten.  “At least you are old enough to poop on your own.  OK.  Let’s go google how to keep you alive.”

—-

Elly spent the rest of the night learning about kittens. George’s present had tall ears, for a cat, black fur and human like brown eyes. The overall effect was a little creepy. It also made no sense. From what Elly could find, this little piece of fluff was a Bombay. Or, at least, matched the characteristics for a Bombay. Except, Bombay kittens sold upwards of 700 dollars each.

The kitten mewed where it was sitting on her shoulder and gave Elly’s earring a suckle before going full cat loaf and purring itself to sleep. 

“You’re are completely ridiculous cat,” Elly mumbled.

“You need to sleep, treasure,” George commented from the doorway. Elly managed not to jump though she wondered how long he’d been lurking there.

“The shop opens in-”

“The shop is closed for repairs,” George insisted. “Hungover bakers need a day off and you will need to talk to the boy when he wakes.”

Elly sighed. She didn’t like much George telling her what to do, but she couldn’t disagree with him. She nodded as she got up to hang the “Gone Fishing” sign on the door that hadn’t been used since Ina’s death. She then flopped on the couch, pulled down the afghan and fell asleep. 

[hardlyinteresting]

Spring Awakening

1940s!Bucky.  Bucky returns home from war a different man than he used to be. Bucky falls in love through the seasons.  Trigger warnings: Mention of war, kind of shitty parents (nothing specific). Let Me Know What You Think of It!

It’s spring when he first sees her. The breeze carries the smell of newly blossomed roses and early morning dew drops. She wears a blue dress and a white cardigan sweater; perfectly stitched flowers of pink and purple with little green leaves frame the wool collar. A brand new set of pearls rest against her collar bone. She looks like something out of the films from before the war; all grace and sophistication as she sits and reads by the window. He holds his cap in his hands in an attempt to hide his calloused and roughed up hands. His perfectly ironed trousers and new dress shirt do little to hide the life of hard work and war he’s seen. He follows her father silently to the garage where he’s shown the Rolls Royce he’ll be driving and maintaining for the family. Her father does not ask him if he served in the war, and for that Bucky is grateful. 

When he came back from the war he found work on the docks but quickly tired of the tales from men who thought the war was nothing but glory; from the men who never really made it to the front lines. He’s looking forward to his new job where he might work in quiet and solitude most of the day. He’s shown the tool bench and given a quick walk around the workshop. Everything he might need is tucked away in neat drawers and hung on the wall behind the worktop. He appreciates the order, it’s something civilian life lacks. He spends his first day of work doing a general tune-up and checking the car over. He wipes the grease from his hands on a handkerchief as he makes his way back to his own car at the end of the day. The sun is setting and the red bricks of the house seem to glow a brilliant amber. In a passing glance, he can see the family sitting down to dinner- with crystal glasses that sparkle under chandelier light, and silverware worth more than a months rent- through the window. What a wonderful life that must be, he thinks.

At home, Becca is excited to hear about his day. Their mother scolds her for running in the house and pestering her brother. He smiles politely at his mother excusing himself to wash up before dinner. They sit together at the small round table in the kitchen eating meatloaf off mismatched plates. Becca excitedly tells stories about her day at school, the latest gossip; any interest in Bucky’s work long forgotten. His mother shoots him a knowing stare as he rubs his left shoulder on his way up the stairs. “I’m alright Ma, I just got to get used to using it again, is all”.

It’s a week later that she gets into the back of the Rolls for the first time. The smell of her perfume fills the car; Lilly of the valley and roses. It smells like the one Becca had tried on the day he took her into the department stores. She doesn’t speak except to say where she’d like to go and what time he should pick her up again. He’s okay with that. She doesn’t speak like any of the girls he’s ever met. She sounds like Kathrine Hepburn with all her soft ‘r’s and annunciated vowels. There’s something fancy about it, and he supposes that’s the point. Mid-Atlantic, just like the film stars and the rich. He wonders if she always talks like that, or if it’s something she’s been taught to do for show. 

Exactly two hours later she slides back into the back seat in the same place he dropped her off. “Home, please” is all she says taking off her hat and her white crochet gloves. 

By the time summer rolls around Bucky has saved enough money to make sure Becca has school supplies in the fall and to buy himself some new shoes he needs. He makes sure his Ma is working less now that he has a stable job. Winnifred isn’t one to sit still and insists on making herself available to babysit the neighbourhood kids on days when she’s not inundated with washing, ironing and mending for her long list of customers. 

On Sunday nights Bucky makes sure he’s home on time for dinner so he can bring Becca to the shop to treat her to a soda or an ice cream cone. The pain in his shoulder is worse some days than it is others, but he pushes through. The numbness sets in afterwhile and it doesn’t hurt too badly. Even on the bad days, the muscle pain hurts less than the bullet that caused it. 

It’s a warm summer in New York, but Bucky doesn’t complain. Alone in the garage, he works in just his undershirt. He comes home at night with grease smudges on his neck and brow bone from wiping away sweat throughout the day. His employer attends polo matches; his wife hosts garden parties, but their daughter spends her days indoors as often as she can. Dressed in white linens she sits by an open window and reads, her ringlet curls blowing in the gentle breeze as her cheeks turn pink in the warm sunlight.

It’s a day in July when she appears in the garage. She looks so out of place wearing her bright yellow dress and white crochet gloves in the room of unfinished wood and exposed brick, he holds back a smirk as she stands in her little white shoes on greased stained concrete. “I need a favour”.

“What can I help you with Y/N” “I’d like to go to the beach,” she tells him holding up her woven bag with the blue bow. “Does your father know?” “Of course”. Bucky doubts it and he briefly considers saying ‘no’ until her father asks him himself, but she looks at him with gentle desperation he’s never seen before.  He nods. Wiping his hands and rolling his shirt sleeves down. 

He waits in the car, giving her space to have her fun. He watches as she takes off her shoes to let her toes touch the water, she holds laughs as a seagull makes off with a pretzel from the pretzel stand, she sets a blanket down and settles into the sand to read her book. She reads until the sun goes down and everyone has collected their beach umbrellas and towels to head home until there’s no light left to read and then she just sits. She watches as the water erases the footprints left in the sand and the pebbles and sea glass are swept away once more. 

Locking the car he makes his way towards her, his footsteps silent in the sand. If she knows he’s approaching she doesn’t acknowledge it. 

“Miss?” Bucky speaks. “Hello James,” she answers softly, and he knows that he could listen to her say his name forever. “I hope you don’t mind me saying, but I think it’s time I take you home. Your folks will be worried”. He can’t imagine how worried he’d be if Becca was out after the street lamps came on. “Thank you James--for bringing me to the beach” she says turning to look at him. He can tell she’s been crying, tear tracks shining against her skin under the moon. “Anytime  Y/N”.

Neither of them speaks as he helps her roll up the blanket and put it back in the bag along with her book: For Whom The Bell Tolls. 

When Bucky gets home it’s nearing midnight. He spent the whole drive home thinking about Y/N. Why was she crying? maybe, he should’ve done something about it. He thinks about all the other girls who had been on the beach during the day, laughing with their friends and walking arm in arm with their dates. He wonders if she spends all her time alone. Winnifred sits in the kitchen listening to Abie’s Irish Rose on the radio while she mends a pair of Becca’s stockings. Bucky hangs his cap on the hook by the door before going to sit at the table with his mother. “Who’s the lucky girl?” Winnifred asks a smile playing at her lips. “There’s no girl Ma” “I just figured you must be out on a date for you to be home so late,” she says looking up at her son, “You’re allowed to do the things you did before the war you know” Bucky takes the hand she offers him from across the table giving it a squeeze, he knows she worries. “I know Ma”. She lets the silence sit between them before she speaks again, “If it wasn’t a date, why are you so late”. “Y/N wanted to go to the beach”. “At night?” “No, no,” he shakes his head his brow creasing as he thinks about the day, “She was there all day, she just sat and read all alone”.

“She sounds awfully lonely,” Winnifred smiles sadly, she squeezes her sons hand tight before getting up, “I saved you some ham and potatoes”. 

It’s Autumn. The groundskeepers spend the whole day raking up the fallen leaves from the gravel driveway, and the lawn. Washes the car in the afternoon sunlight thinking that the warm sun might keep his hands from freezing in the chilled water bucket. The change in temperature makes his shoulder stiffer but he tries to ignore it the best he can, the same way he tries to ignore the fact that he’s been home for almost a year and nothing is the same, nor will it ever be again. He tries not to think about the man he was before the war; fun and flirty, full of life and so sure he had plenty of time left to enjoy. A man in the peak of his early twenties. Now, he finds himself feeling empty more often than not. Now almost 27, he feels worn down and so unsure. 

Y/N finds him in the garage later that day tuning the engine, and he can’t help but think that she looks like the sun itself in her yellow skirt with a matching jacket. And for the first time since he first laid eyes on her, he lets himself think she’s rather pretty. He knows that before the war he would’ve been bold enough to ask her on a date, he would take her dancing and maybe steal a kiss at the end of the night if things went well. He wonders if she dances, if she’s ever been swing dancing or if she’s only ever waltzed with boring rich boys at Christmas parties and weddings. He gives her a drive to the city; to the cinema. She wants to see Notorious. Bucky wonders why even after all the news clips, all the grainy footage of the destruction overseas, everyone still wants to make movies about the war. Everyone wants to see a hero, he supposes. Bucky is about to ask what time he should be back to pick her up when she asks him to join her. “I’ve never been to see a film alone before. Would you mind terribly?” She asks her hands holding tight to her little black purse. “What kind of man would I be if I let a pretty girl go see a film alone?” he smiles kindly. 

The movie isn’t as bad as he thought it would be. They got most of it wrong in his opinion, but what does his opinion really matter to anyone but himself? Y/N holds onto his arm as they walk back to the car. 

Would she even say yes to a date with him if he asked? He dismisses the thought immediately. Her father would kill him, and who knows what kind of trouble Y/N would be in, going out with a poor boy from Brooklyn. He would be in his right mind to shake her off his arm and keep his distance now, but he can’t bring himself to do it. She seems happy for the first time in a long time, and he hopes that maybe just having someone with her has warded off the loneliness for just a little while. 

“When was the last time you saw a movie?” Y/N asks on the drive back home. “It was before the war”. She’s quiet for a moment a crease growing between her brows, “I’m sorry--I wouldn’t have asked you to come to see that movie with me if I had known. Of course, I should’ve known”. “It was a fine film,” he assures her, “you couldn’t have known, I didn’t tell you”.

In November Y/N takes more trips into the city as she begins her Christmas shopping. Bucky waits patiently in the car and helps her carry boxes and bags full of clothes and perfumes, hats and ties, handkerchiefs and new cufflinks. 

Bucky starts saving to buy his Ma a new radio. Theirs broke back in August, and though she didn’t say anything, Bucky knows she misses listening to her radio programs while she sews. He keeps the perfume he bought for Becca in the drawer in his room. A fancy one from the department store. He spent more than he should’ve, but she’s his only sister, how could he not? It’s the night of the first snowfall, Bucky is finishing up in the garage, sorting his tools and cleaning his hands when he hears a door slam. He assumes it’s one of the housekeepers leaving for the night. 

Y/N is standing by his car when he finishes locking up the garage. She’s shivering in her red wool coat with its fur trim and her leather gloves.  She looks like she’s about to freeze to death. 

“What are you doing out here? You’re going to catch a cold”. “Will you take me dancing?” “I’m sorry--What?” “I want to go dancing”. “It’s late. I finished work for the night Y/N. I can take you into the city tomorrow if you like”. “I want to go to the dance hall. Can we not go as friends?” Every sensible part of Bucky knows he should say no. But instead, he says: “We can’t go as friends, but you can be my date”.

He swears to god Y/N almost squeals with happiness as she climbs into the front seat of his car. 

He’s not dressed as nicely as he’d like to be on their first date, but Y/N doesn’t care. She’s all smiles all the way to Manhattan. And he wonders if this is the first date she’s ever been on, and he feels like he’s letting his mother down. He should be dressed properly, he should’ve brought her flowers. She deserves better.

It only takes a song and a half for Y/N to get the hang of swing and Bucky is impressed, and happier than he’s been in a long time. They slow dance too, standing as close as they possibly can, he’s careful where he puts his hands. He likes the way she tucks her head beneath his chin. He feels like he can protect her. And he wants to freeze at this moment. The first time he’s felt truly alive since the war. The girl he’s adored for months held safely in his arms. He doesn’t let himself think about the blood he spilt in England, France or Germany, or why he really doesn’t deserve to be touched by someone so pure and untainted by the war. 

When the dance hall closes she begs him not to take her home yet. They sit in the backseat of his car watching the sun come up. She leans her head against his chest, her legs curled up on the seat beside her. He presses a kiss to the top of her head and she holds his hand tighter. 

“Thank you,” she mumbles through a yawn, the night finally catching up to her.

“No, thank you”.

He gets her home before her parents wake up and before the house staff arrive. And he starts his work cleaning the Rolls early. 

When he gets home  Winnifred smacks him up-side the head twice. Once for having her worried sick about where he’d ended up, not coming home for 24 hours. And another time for keeping the girl out all night. She reminds him that she taught him better than that. And he knows. Becca gets scolded for making jokes about Bucky having a girlfriend. 

Winter, he hates it. The snow reminds him of the time he spent trudging through the woods in Europe, and the cold goes straight to his shoulder. He wakes up in pain and goes to bed in pain. He prays that it’s a short winter this year. By the time Christmas comes around Bucky and Y/N are going steady. During the day he takes her into town when he’s not working on the car. She makes him go to the movies with her, and he takes her to dinners in Brooklyn. She loves it. She meets the people he knew before the war, his friends from school on their way to work in the docks, Dorothy who works at the diner, she makes sure to have apple pie ready every Friday for when Y/N and Bucky visit. On Christmas Eve while her family talk business in the living room and entertain guests Y/N sneaks out the house to catch Bucky before he leaves for the night.

“Hi James,” she smiles sweetly against his lips, holding tight to the lapel of his coat, standing on tippy-toes.  

“Hello doll,” he smiles back. His hands quickly make their way to her arms in an attempt to keep her warm. 

She gives him a new pair of leather gloves, a pair nicer than he could ever afford, and he’s grateful but ashamed that his gift to her isn’t worth as much. “It’s not much, but I thought you’d like it”. He hands her the leather-bound book, wrapped with a twine string bow. She holds in tightly to her chest, fingers running along the binding. A Farewell to Arms. 

“It’s perfect Bucky, thank you”.

His mother nearly cries when she unwraps the new Crosley radio. She tells him it’s too much. He tells her it’s not enough. Becca loves her new perfume and makes sure it’s sitting proudly in the centre of her vanity table. Becca gives him a new pair of socks and a shaving razor. His mother gives him a new knit sweater and a kiss to his forehead. “Hopefully, if you're warm enough, your shoulder will stop acting up”. 

On New Year’s Eve, Y/N meets Bucky’s family during the day. She makes sure to kiss him at twelve noon, “This is our New Year’s kiss,” she tells him. Winnifred makes stew and bakes cookies. Becca spends the afternoon asking Y/N about her clothes and showing her the makeup she’s bought with her pocket money recently. Y/N makes sure to help Winnifred in the kitchen. She hasn’t a clue what to do, but she’s a fast learner and Winnifred is patient and kind. 

It’s spring and almost Bucky’s birthday. Bucky and Y/N go on picnics when they can. When it rains they take drives and park off to the side on dirt roads. Sitting in the back seat while the rain pelts down on the roof of the car and cascades down the windows, Y/N reads aloud from whatever book she’s reading her back to Bucky’s chest. He plays with her hair and steals kisses between paragraphs. He could listen to her talk forever. She says she likes his accent more, 

“At least it’s from a real place,” she says. 

He humours and gives in when she asks him to read sections from her favourite poetry books. There isn’t a single thing he wouldn’t do for her. 

She asks him about his shoulder one day when she catches him wincing while he works on the car. 

He tells her about how he got shot as honestly and with as little detail as possible. She tells him that she wanted to be a nurse when the war started, but her parents wouldn’t let her. He can’t bear the thought of her overseas, and he tells her so. 

“I’m sorry for upsetting you,” she says.

“You could never upset me”.

Bucky saves his money for an apartment. He has six months rent stashed under his mattress. 

He’s another year older, Winnifred buys lamb for dinner, and Y/N joins them for dinner around their little kitchen table. Becca makes sure he gets his birthday beats. He doesn’t have the heart to tell her that he can hardly feel them, with her tiny fists and weak wrists. She apologises and hugs him when she realizes she had hit his left arm. When the table is cleared and the dishes are done, Becca and Winnifred leave the couple alone. The radio plays in the background as they slow dance on linoleum tiles. 

“Marry me?” He asks as the song ends. “Yes,” she replies without hesitation. 

Winnifred lets Bucky have her wedding rings. Y/N wears her engagement ring on a chain tucked beneath the collars of her Brightly coloured blouses and dresses. 

It’s nearly June when they tell her parents. Bucky wears his best clothes, makes sure his shoes are polished. His mother’s words “Be honest, that’s the best you can be,” ring in his head. He rings the doorbell and waits. He holds his cap in his hands, the way he did on his first day on the job. 

“Sir, I’d like to speak to you in private, if I may,” Bucky says when her father answers the door. He’s smoking a cigar and ushers Bucky towards his office. 

Passing the staircase Bucky sees Y/N. She’s wearing the blue dress she had on the first day he saw her and he wonders if she did it on purpose. She smiles encouragingly, her hand held over where he knows her engagement ring hangs. 

“Sir, I’d like to ask for your permission to marry your daughter. I know it seems like I don’t have much, but I have money saved, I have an apartment ready in the city. I can support Y/N. I love her more than anythin--”

“I don’t give you my blessing. But you can marry her if you wish. Just know, that if she chooses to marry you, she is not part of this family any longer. Should she choose to marry you, she is choosing to live the life of a poor Brooklyn wife,” He takes a puff of his cigar settling into his chair behind his desk, “The choice is hers”. 

In July, Bucky and Y/N marry in the same church Winnifred and George Barnes were married in. Becca is Y/N’s maid of honour and extraordinarily excited about it, to say the least. They don’t have a cake or champagne but they do have their own apartment to go home to. It’s tiny, two bedrooms, a kitchen, and a bathroom, but it’s home. Bucky hums familiar tunes as they dance their first dance in their kitchen. 

It’s spring again when their daughter is born. They call her Rose.  They wrap her in a handmade blanket Winnifred gave them; tiny pink and purple flowers with little green leaves are stitched at each corner.

[floof-reppu]

Aight, so… this is my piece for the BNHA Writer's Fest, written for @ellectric-blue. I wanted to give you the best quality writing I could manage with my knowledge and time crunch, so I chose to write for Yaoyorozu. I've been a little bit preoccupied lately with a lot of family issues since it's that time of year, but nonetheless I was able to pump this out for you just in time. Happy Holidays to you!

Word Count: 2.4k

—

It was getting to be that time of year yet again; Christmas was just around the corner.

Many hours were always dedicated to shopping for friends and loved ones, this year being no exception. You had gotten to know your current friends over the course of the past few months, especially living at the dorms together with them for at least half that time. Going through such hardships together with your classmates solidified your bonds with one another and made this Christmas feel special to you.

The lot of you decided to host your own Secret Santa of sorts, which was fun and all, but you ended up drawing a name you… didn't exactly expect or desire to draw. Momo Yaoyorozu was more than just a fellow classmate or a friend; to you, she was your crush. To say that you were absolutely terrified was an understatement. She was rich beyond measure, something that you couldn't compare to in the slightest.

Yaoyorozu wasn't much of a materialistic girl thankfully, but it was hard to point out her exact interests and put them to heart. As far as she was concerned, she bought things out of habit and would rather better the economy than use her quirk and imbalance it. Maybe she would like something that you made yourself?

Instead of dawdling on the thought, you instead decided it might be nice to learn how to crochet. Homemade gifts were the best, because it shows how much you care, the time dedicated and the overall process being most meticulous. A scarf would look lovely wrapped around Momo's neck (and possibly around your own as well), a winter coat look sounding appeasing to you, and crocheting one couldn't be all that hard… right?

Your time limit made everything all that more stressful, as well as trying to hide the supplies from your fellow classmates, especially Ashido. If she found out, she would have an absolute fit and press for more information, which you couldn't have at all. That's why you did shopping by yourself, picking out the softest yarn at your disposal. The colors you'd chosen were a compliment to her hero costume: crimson and silver. They both look good on her regardless, but you thought it would be nice for a potential outfit.

Smuggling the materials into the dorms without getting caught wasn't as hard as you thought it would be, given that everyone was preoccupied with one thing or another. However… you did catch a glimpse of Yaoyorozu, and— well, she's walking over here now. Shit.

"Oh, Y/N? Everyone was wondering where you had gone!" The smile she had on her face sent butterflies through your stomach. She glanced down at the bag in your hand which you tried your best to hide from plain sight, but was too wide. "You went to the store? What did you buy?"

"Oh, ah… just a few things, nothing special…" You had to get away from her, and quick. Her eyes continually glanced at the bag, which you kept moving around to block from her sight. "Anyways, what are you up to? Not doing any shopping?"

"There's no need! I purchased my present the day I drew a name!" Momo had her hands folded in front of her body oh so characteristically of her as she spoke proudly. Of course she would have purchased something already. "It was quite easy for me to choose for the recipient of my Secret Santa gift."

"Oh… well, I'm still thinking of what to get mine."

"I'm sure whatever it is will be amazing, Y/N. You're such a thoughtful person, and I know whoever receives your present will absolutely cherish and adore it."

There she goes again, saying something so beautiful that it makes your heart melt. She always seemed to know just what to say to put you to ease, but it made you feel even more pressured to make your gift as perfect as possible so she isn't disappointed. Momo seemed to notice the awkward silence you gave her, blushing a bit out of embarrassment.

"I hope I haven't said anything wrong, Y/N."

"Oh, no! Not at all! I'm just thinking about what you said… thank you, Yaoyorozu. I'm going to start working on my gift now."

And with that, you gave her a small wave before going to your dorm room and practically throwing the yarn to the side. She almost caught you red-handed, but thankfully you were able to change the subject quick enough before she had the nerve to peek in your bag.

Opening the lid to your laptop, you searched up a tutorial on how to crochet a scarf, and thank goodness there was one that popped up immediately that seemed to be reliable enough to follow. You almost forgot that you bought the needles as well (because how would you have been able to crochet without the needles). Grabbing all the materials from the bag, you started to work on your hopefully wonderful masterpiece for Momo.

—

Weeks had passed since that fateful day, and with every new talent came bumps in the road. You had failed at least five times trying to make the scarf the way you wanted it to turn out, even while following the tutorial. Yarn was wasted and you even had to make a second trip to the store to purchase even more of it.

But your hard work finally paid off, and in front of you sat your finished creation. Each thread was carefully crocheted together perfectly, and you couldn't wait to present it to your crush. Putting it in a box and wrapping it up, you didn't put your name on it, instead writing Your Secret Santa on the tag. You didn't forget to put Momo's name on it, though.

Going down to the first floor, the tree looked marvelous and grand in the middle of the lobby. Presents were already adorning the underside of the tree, while bulbs and lights alike decorated the branches. A star was placed on the top, shining brightly and looking over you and everyone else. You remember putting it up with your friends vividly, as if it just happened yesterday. Iida and Yaoyorozu did most of the clean up when it came to the decorations, all of them being strung in the same places on the tree. Moving them so it looked nice was a must.

And there she was, Momo Yaoyorozu, dressed in some of the most Christmas-like articles of clothing she owned and sitting alone. Placing your present under the tree, you swiftly took a seat beside her, a blush evident on your cheeks.

"Merry Christmas, Yaoyorozu." She turned to face you as you spoke, a bit surprised since she wasn't really paying attention to the seat beside her before now. She returned your greeting earnestly, eyes closed and a wide grin taking up her face.

"Thank you, Y/N, and a Merry Christmas to you too. Are you excited for the Secret Santa present exchange?"

"Yes, I am. I can't wait for a certain someone to open my gift and hopefully smile just like a kid when they see what it is."

"I see. I'm quite confident that my gift with have that same effect, but I'm not sure… maybe I overdone it?" Momo opened her eyes, and for a second you saw a hint of doubt in her expression. "Gifts aren't always things you should buy, that much is for certain. Sometimes I wish Mother and Father would stop purchasing them and be a tad more creative."

"Do you get the same things every year?"

"Unfortunately so. Clothes are always high on the list as well as the newest technologies, but once in a great while I might receive something completely different."

"Really? Like—"

"Everyone, we are now going to start passing out the Secret Santa presents! Please refrain from opening yours until they are all handed out!" Iida was ever the wise one and cut you off, but for a good reason at that. Both Yaoyorozu and yourself directed your attention to the blue-haired president and his wild hand gestures as he spoke. The raven-haired girl beside you took that as her cue to stand up, dusting off her skirt.

"I apologize, Y/N. It's my duty as the vice president to help Iida with handing out the presents. You wouldn't mind saving my seat though, would you?"

"Of course not, take your time."

In a little less than ten minutes, everyone had their present on their lap. Ashido looked to be the most excited to open hers, while Bakugo glared at his. Your present seemed to be big, but not heavy, so you took it as something that was either a gag or a very expensive item (because everyone knows the smaller the gift the more it costs these days). Yaoyorozu sat down beside you yet again when she was finished, the box you had so precariously wrapped earlier placed on her legs.

"I'm quite curious to see what I've received. It's not on the heavy side, but…" She looked over at your present, the curious side of her lighting up yet again. "Perhaps you have a clue as to what your gift is, Y/N?"

"Not a clue. It looks like it would be something big, but it's so light that it doesn't feel like much." You wanted to shake the box, but you didn't want to break whatever was inside if it was fragile. Trying to keep the attention off of you, your head glanced down at the box in Momo's grasp. "Why don't you open yours first? We can see what each other has gotten that way."

"That is a very smart idea, Y/N. Very well, I'll open mine first."

Her hands went and tugged at the bow you added at the very last minute, pulling it free and making it easier for her to tear off the wrapping paper. She read the tag, a bit confused as to why there wasn't another person's name written. Nevertheless, she tore off the rest of the paper and lifted the lid to the box. Tissue paper covered your creation as well as a card you decided to put in so she knew who it was actually from. Pulling it out, she unfolded the envelope and stared wide-eyed at the card.

Momo Yaoyorozu,

I thought of you when I made this scarf for you with my own hands. Your family spoils you with material possessions, and nothing that comes from the heart. They want to make you happy with whatever you desire, but that's not what Christmas should always be about. It's about giving others heartfelt, thoughtful gifts. I hope you cherish this scarf as much as I cherish the time I spent making this for you. I wouldn't have it any other way.

With much love,

Y/N

You saw tears forming at the corners of her eyes as she read the card. She threw the tissue paper aside and took out your real gift, the one you handmade yourself. The silver accented the crimson perfectly, and she clenched the material in her hands. The tears started to flow like a fountain; that's when you knew that you did the right thing.

"Y/N, I… just can't believe that you spent so much time making this for me. You didn't have to do this—"

"I didn't do this because I had to, I did this because I wanted to. I… meant every word that I wrote on that card, Momo. I love you so much, and I would do anything for you. I wanted to make you smile, because God how I love it when you smile. I messed up a lot of times while I was making that, and even while training and studying I managed to get it done for you in just the nick of time," You paused, catching your breath and chuckling slightly, "but anyways, I hope you like—"

"Like it? Y/N, I absolutely love it. This is the most thoughtful present I've ever received. Thank you from the bottom of my heart," Momo wiped the tears away from her eyes and wrapped the scarf around her neck, her gaze fixed on yours, "so… would you care to open yours now?"

You nodded, prodding carefully at the paper covering your present. Whoever wrapped it used a lot of tape, which wasn't the best idea in a situation like this, so it caused you to take a bit of extra time tearing it off. Finally, it was revealed to you.

The one who had your name was none other than Yaoyorozu herself.

Neither of you expected for it to end up this way, but it was quite the pleasant surprise. You looked at the culprit out of the corner of your eye and opened the box at the same time, revealing a card for you as well.

Y/N,

I know how much you adore the Christmas holiday, as well as books. I myself, as you may already know, enjoy both just as much as you. My gift to you comes from the heart, as I have purchased a book full of Christmas fables for us to enjoy. I would love for us to sit under a blanket together and read it.

This is the most discreet way I could confess my romantic feelings. I would very much love to spend more time with you, as well as… get to know you more than I already do.

Please accept my invitation as well as my feelings.

Momo Yaoyorozu

This was… no way was this happening.

"Y/N…?" Momo sounded worried, her pitch lowering drastically as she met your gaze once again.

"Yes. Yes, Momo, of course I accept your feelings." Now you were the one that was tearing up, grasping the book in your hands and letting the box drop on the ground. "I want this to be the first thing we do together. Tonight."

"I would love to, Y/N."

You spent the rest of the night in the comfort of your own room, Momo and yourself wrapped in a blanket with no worries whatsoever as you took turns reading aloud the many tales. When you were at the last few pages, a blank space was occupying them.

This was where you were going to write your own Christmas Story, with you and Momo as the main characters.

You would never, ever forget this day.

[etraytin]

Quarantine, Day 232

October 28 Busy day today, as promised! I got up this morning and got the kiddo going on his schoolwork (asynchronous learning day means he had lots of time to work on catch-up assignments) and then headed off to my doctor's office. I lost the labwork order I needed to get my routine yearly bloodwork, so they printed it off and brought it outside to me so I didn't have to enter the office. Doctors and dentists and the like are extremely concerned with keeping unnecessary people out of their offices, which makes sense. At the kiddo's pediatrician, they appear to have renovated an empty space next door into an entirely segregated sick-child waiting room, rather than the simpler left-side-well, right-side-sick waiting room they had before, separated by a wall bisecting most of the room. Now both those sides are for well children and sick children can't come into the office proper at all. I am hoping this is a healthy winter for the kiddo.  But anyway! With my paperwork in hand, I bopped down to the blood testing center for my blood draw. That wasn't much different from usual, aside from a very avant-garde arrangement of chairs in the waiting room that had many fewer chairs, all pointing in different directions away from one another. Routine labwork cost me 26.33, a weird number that included a 20 dollar copay and then 6.33 cents of coinsurance for the various tests. It was a weird number, but at least it was considerably less than I would've paid without our exceedingly expensive insurance. I didn't have to wait very long and the phlebotomist did a good job with me. I asked specifically for a back-of-the-hand draw, partially because I'm a tough stick and partially because I wanted to be able to show the kiddo what it looks like. It was a model wound, tiny with minimal blood and only slight swelling. The kiddo seemed somewhat reassured about his own upcoming draw, but only somewhat.  I went home and showed off my hand and checked to make sure everything was still going well. On the way, I stopped for gas at the new Wawa and got myself a big cup of pumpkin spice coffee with hazelnut creamer. It's the most wonderful time of the year! Also I was very hungry from fasting. Kiddo had gotten quite a bit of work done on his school stuff and my husband got good news from his own morning telemedicine appointment, so all was copacetic. I stayed home for about an hour and figured out what assignments the kiddo still had to do, and then it was off on another adventure through the bridge-tunnel to pick up my auction winnings!  Now I know the natural reaction here might be "You bid on another auction? Did you learn NOTHING from the Takis adventure?" I understand your reaction and the answer is yes I did learn something, but not very much. I certainly didn't bid on any massive job lots at this auction, which was for a beauty shop that had shut down. I placed lowball bids on all kinds of interesting and useful things, was outbid on most of them, and purchased what was left. In this case, that amounted to two large three-drawer plastic storage bins, one small three-drawer storage bin, and nine pounds of reinforced cotton coil. I also got a bonus in that one large drawer was full of a dozen rolls of little-bitty garbage bags, the perfect size to scoop litter into. I won't need to scrounge grocery bags for years!  (Also, the guy who helped me find my items at the auction house definitely remembered me from last time, and I suspect I may be hearing about the takis adventure forever now.)  Your other question at this point may be "what is reinforced cotton coil?" and the answer is that it is very weird and cool stuff. Imagine a cotton ball, the sort you use for makeup or cleaning or whatever. Now imagine a cotton ball that is still the same diameter, but four hundred feet long, wrapped up in a tight coil and shoved into a cardboard box. Reinforced just means that there is a paper tape inside the middle of this long cotton rope, giving it a bit more structure. Originally it's for salon use. It's the stuff they wrap around your head when you get a perm so the chemicals don't seep out onto your face, and something about manicures too, but I have bigger ideas. You have any idea how many kitten butts can be wiped with a cotton ball a quarter-mile long? (I have three boxes of the stuff, so 1200 feet and change.) How many ears can be cleaned? How many crocheted catnip mice stuffed? I'm sure there's lots of other things that can be done with it, and I'm open to ideas. If I get the drop spindle I want for Christmas, maybe I'll try and make yarn from it. So many uses!  With my van once again filled with cheaply acquired auction goodies, I headed back home to impress my guys with such weird bounty and also eat some lunch. In the afternoon, the kiddo had a dentist appointment, which has historically not been a great time for us. Kiddo is not quite as nervous of the dentist as he is of the phlebotomist, but it's pretty close. This was just a cleaning, though, so no shots and no pain and it was okay. He actually did really well holding still and following directions, and he doesn't need anything else for six more months. Yes! I was so happy that we walked next door to Gamestop where he picked out Fallout 4, which was on an excellent sale because it's kind of old now. He can't play it until he is done with his catch up work, but both he and my husband are very excited about it.  Husband made dinner, an experimental spaghetti variant involving crushing diced canned tomatoes with a potato masher, because I was trying to explain to MIL how to attach files to email again. She wanted to send me some documents so I can three-way-call with her and the financial advisor tomorrow, but she couldn't access her own email and couldn't figure out how to move the scanned documents (sixteen pages, each one its own file) anyplace that I could access them. She finally got one good picture of the first page with her camera and texted it to me, and then we decided that was enough for now. I don't know bologna about this stuff anyway, so hopefully the advisor will explain it to both of us tomorrow. The spaghetti was good.  Evening was less busy, which was nice. Kiddo took a shower with minimal complaining, and decided that he really wants to join our online Mutants and Masterminds group, which is two years older than he is by now. I told him that was fine, but he has to be willing to really work on his posts because this group requires good spelling and complete sentences in every post. (This is true, and ordinarily we probably wouldn't have a player this young despite no official rules against it, but we have put thousands of dollars into owning the site over the years and that ought to come with at least small privileges.) I don't know if he'll actually do it, but he's coming up with a character concept and we'll help him build it and see how it goes. It would be excellent writing practice! We'll get started on that tomorrow. 

[waterstar2016]

How about Raphael x Reader His girl had a long day and only wants to hide herself under a blanket begging for it to be over. But as she comes home, he is waiting with a little surprise for her. I dont know maybe her favorite movie or book something in this case^^ You have free hand sweets thanks :) *hugs*

Here you go! This one flowed so easily. Thank you for the awesome request. I hope you like it *hugs*

This is SFW. Warning…fluffy…lol.

It was taking everything in her not to cry on the bus ride home from work. She was overwhelmed, exhausted and just plain fed up. Tucking her head further into her jacket she leaned in closer to the the barely cracked window, wishing she could open it further. Her senses chafing at the multitudes of smells that surrounded her. A woman’s rose perfume too strong, a man who was sorely in need of a shower and jackets that held the fragrant remnants of old cigarettes. Just a few more stops and she would be home.

She was grateful it was Friday and she didn’t have to see her place of employment for a couple of days. Normally, she loved her job, but this last week had tested her patience. Her boss was out of town and the guy who was acting as the general manager had a serious superiority complex. He had berated every decision that she made that week and requested draft after draft of the paperwork for the same account, nit picking at every single detail. Sighing, she finally got the bastard to sign off on it, two hours after she was supposed to have left for the day.

One more stop. She started collecting her things and realized that she left her cell phone at work. “Damnit!” She huffed under her breath, and a mother holding a small child across the isle gave her a disapproving shake of her head. She mouthed “Sorry.” to the woman, but all she got was an ice cold glare. All she wanted was her bed, mounds of pillows and her favourite blanket that her grandmother had crocheted for her when she moved away from home the previous year.

The worst of it was that not having her cell meant she couldn’t text him. She pulled the cord on the bus, signalling to the driver to stop. She grabbed her belongings and trudged down the stairs and onto the sidewalk. Wishing once more for her cell, she started walking the two bocks from the bus stop to her apartment. Maybe she could ask her elderly neighbour if she could borrow her phone to give him a call? Spirits buoyed slightly at the thought of a solution, she hurried home.

Knocking at Alice’s door she waited patiently for the sound of the shuffle of her slippers. Nothing. She tried again. “Please be home.” She whispered. After no response she finally admitted defeat and rested her head against the door and felt tears start to form in her eyes. Squeezing her eyes shut she accepted the fact that she would just have to wait until tomorrow to head back to the office and grab her phone. Regretting having dropped her computer off to the repair shop that morning she dug for her keys and slipped them into the lock of her apartment door.

Raphael heard her keys jiggling in the door and a muttered curse as she dropped them. He had been planning to surprise her since he talked to her the previous night. He hated hearing her sounding so deflated. Part of him wanted to take a trip to her work and have a nice little chat with that numbskull she had to deal with in this last week. Cracking his neck he shook off the feelings of anger that were bubbling up inside of him. He needed to focus on her. She finally opened the door and at the sight of her he immediately knew he made the right decision in coming tonight.

She gasped. In the middle of her living room stood a large figure. His broad shoulders and height making the space seem smaller then it actually was. She dropped her purse and lunch bag to the floor. “Raph.” She whispered. He smirked and she couldn’t help the smile that broke through on her face. His smirk was definitely her kryptonite.

Walking up to him he grabbed her in a one armed hug. Lowering his head he brushed his cheek against hers, his rough textured skin rasping against hers. “Heya, Tiger.” The sound of his deep gravelly voice chased the negative thoughts that were storming through her mind. She looked up into his green and gold eyes and smiled. “Raph, am I ever glad you’re here, I’ve had a hell of a week, that acting GM is a dick, I forgot my cell at work and…” He placed his finger on her lips and hummed in his throat. “I know this week has been rough on ya sweetheart. Are ya sure you don’t want me to talk to that Alex guy for ya?” He ran his fingers through her hair and waited for her answer. She knew he was serious, and just for a second she contemplated having Raph “bump” into him on his way home on a dark and stormy night. Chuckling at the thought she shook her head. “No, it’s alright Raph, as much as I dislike the guy he’s not worth the effort.”

Raph huffed. “Well, let me know if ya change your mind.” Leaning into his plastron she realized that he was only holding her with one arm. Cocking her head up at him curiously she asked; “Raph what are you holding behind your back?” He grinned down at her and handed her a brown paper wrapped package tied with red coloured twine. “Here, I got ya this.” Raph stood holding her gently at her waist while she eagerly opened his gift.

“Raphael! How did you manage to get this?” It was the first edition of her favourite authors latest book and when she opened the cover she saw there was a dedication on the first page. As she read it she felt like her heart had stopped.

“I used walked these city streets alone. I used to look up at the stars alone. I used to dream alone. Those days of being alone are now gone because of you. I now walk with you. I now stargaze and make wishes with you. I now dream of a bright and wonderful future. All because of you. Never forget that I love you. - R -”

With tears in her eyes she looked up at him, her eyes searching his. He lowered his head and spoke low. “I had April get this for me, her friend knows the author.” He looked sheepish for a second and then met her gaze. “I, uh, also asked April to get her to dedicate it to ya.” He chuckled quietly. “She’s the one that took what I wanted to say and turned it into something romantic.” Taking his thumb he brushed away the single tear that had managed to slide down her cheek.

Standing up on her tip toes she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. Raph responded with eagerness and held her tightly. Pulling away from him she played with his bandana tails, and she heard the low churr in his chest. He loved it when she did that. Looking at the red material in between her fingers she sighed. “Thank you Raph, this is the most amazing gift I have ever received, and I love you too.”

Raph grinned. Picking her up he carried her into the bedroom and she laughed when she saw blankets and pillows that weren’t there that morning piled on her bed, creating a huge and sumptuous nest. On the nightstand were some of her and his favourite snacks. He gently laid her down and crawled in beside her. “Would ya read some of that book to me while I hold ya?”

Gone were the thoughts of the last week. They had been replaced by the thoughtfulness of this wonderful man that had appeared in her life. He may have been a giant mutant turtle, but he was her giant mutant turtle and she wouldn’t have it any other way. She nodded and giggled as Raph grabbed her by the hips, tucked her into his plastron, and rested his head on hers. She wiggled a little to get comfortable and opened the book.

She started by reading the dedication.

End.

[sour-ghiden]

Hiding Out (Jan 25 2022)

(np) I don't remember this in it's entirety, so I'll try to get down what I remember. Start where I remember the best. I was in a place, it was sort of like someone's apartment, there was art and craft stuff on shelves and stuff, so assumedly, this was some sort of craft shop. I was hurriedly rushed into there by two or three other people, I cannot exactly remember, but I know they were trying to protect me from something, as to what, I am not entirely certain of, was some sort of monster...person...being...thing. We were all being quiet, waiting for this thing to hopefully pass us over. I was looking around, and found some very unique yarn. It was sort of the apocalypse outside so I didn't think anyone would care if I took some. I grabbed a couple bundles and stuck them in a bag. Then and older couple came out from another room and told me that if I wanted to take some yarn, I didn't have to hide it, I could just ask. They smiled kindly at me, as if they knew I was important enough to be protected, as if they knew who/what I really was and were honored I was there. They were a nice couple. They asked if I needed anything else. I was looking around and the older lady had some crochet trophies, and I asked them about knitting needles and a few other things. We were otherwise very quiet. I had a feeling there was something I was going to have to do that was very big and could cause harm to me, and that's part of the reason I was protected. If I don't do this thing, everyone would be doomed. From another room, a younger girl came out. Her eyes were white and glazed over. Something was very wrong with her. She jumped at me, I felt a bite. I was saying loudly that she bit me, but it turned out she didn't, just bit my clothes, she was dispatched. Otherwise no bite marks or anything. The people looking for me, we heard them outside, running to the room. Somewhere in the mess that followed (most of which is a blur), the older couple got killed. I am beginning to wonder as I wrote this if this is true here.

I found last night someone has cut the wires in my brain. I was very angry and trying to figure out who would do such a thing. They knew what they were doing too, because they only cut those in relation to nonphysical connection and workings. Thinking it may have been someone or something that's been around me for a while, masquerading as something non-threatening.

…speaking of things around me...

found out a week ago someone/something that some call "the bodyguard" but most call "the tarantula (and not because of what it/they look like, but how it/they act and other tarantula like attributes)" It/they are a bodyguard for a group of at least four (could be more) called "the jaded cross" or something like that.

"the tarantula" has been studying me for a long time apparently, every move, every pattern that arises, every reaction, both physically and nonphysically. The work I have been doing has left me weaken for nearly a day after the night of work, it/they know this, and are waiting for a time when I cannot recover fast enough to fight them. I try to change up when I do things to confused them, but right now I'm not sure what else to do.

[littlemix-styleblog]

Requested Greece Inspired Holiday Look

Oh man this one was hard, mainly due to the fact my internet started to play up :( But we got there in the end and i`m pretty proud of my results. This was pretty much open, Perrie, Leigh and Jade were easy to do, but Jesy was hardest and I was stuck with 3 things for her because she doesn`t go on holiday alot or she doesn`t broadcast her vacation so it was quite hard to know what to go for. But these are my results

Jesy

Prettylittlething KHAKI CONTRAST HIGH WAISTED BIKINI BOTTOMS: £10. We don`t see Jesy in bikinis a lot, not as much as the other girls at least. But I know she has worn black and white bikinis and it`s quite hard to know what kind of bikini she likes. So I went for one she has worn before for a night out, but in white and black. But this time you can get it in a khaki set, you can also get it in black if you check out the link. When she wore it I think it suited her, you have none of that buisness today where you can see the bras today and the cups are bigger then your face, I don`t like that personally. I do think she needs to compliment her figure more and she can start with not wearing them bras.

MissGuided black oversized fishnet tshirt dress: £12. So it hasn`t been until the last two or three years Jesy has worn colour, black is still her favourite colour it seems but she`s starting to stray away from it now. Immediatley this piece stood out for me not because it`s black but because she has worn similars before on stage. This is perfect for a holiday as it`s light and easy and you can throw it on over a bikini, you can wear it to the shops on holiday etc. Definitely a staple this one.

Topshop Red Bead and Tassel Drop Earrings: £7. This is where I started struggling. Thankfully I remembered to when she wore these and I thought, these would look great on holiday. The colour is obviously a friend of the suns, will go with a outfit for when your shopping so if you team them with a dress and some sandals and a bag I think it would look great. I do think they are more suited for night time however, as they look more like that way. But together with a tan you`ll be winning at life.

Havaianas Black Slim Flip Flops: £24. One thing i`ve seen Jesy wear all the time is flip flops, never really seen her wear anything else on holiday. These are great for slipping and sliding them on, when you want to walk on the beach and you don`t want sand between your toes. Of course you can get cheaper ones at your Primark or Walmart. Jade is also a keen flip flop fan.

Topshop Jacquard Ruffle Wrap Midi Dress: £49. I know what your thinking...A dress for Jesy? Which isnt black. Well since she decided to stray from black she`s also gone and worn different clothes now and that includes dresses. I noticed she likes free flowing dresses, something you can move about in, maybe kick a leg. This one came about as I remembered her instagram stories from her recent holiday in which she wore a green dress, but without the ruffles. But in the same colour. This can be worn to town for a shopping spree with again some sandals and a pair of earrings.

MissGuided Black stud oversized sunglasses: £16. Sunglasses seem to be Little Mix`s thing nowadays, you can`t go a day without seeing one of them wearing any. When I was struggling I found these and they screamed Jesy to me because they are black, they are studded, they are bold and edgy just like Jesy. Studded sunglasses are very on trend at the moment, I believe these are cheaper then the Topshop versions. 

Ego Zane Studded Detail Espadrille Slider In Black Faux Leather: £24.99. I know what your thinking, what the hell are those. Well Jesy has a tendancy to wear ugly, unattractive shoes. When I saw those Topshop black mules she wore them sometime ago they came to mind and I can honestly say I am not a fan of the mule. But anyway, these are big black and boldy, they can slip on and off why not be ideal for Jesy? They tick every box.

Topshop Mom Authentic Rip High Rise Short: £32. When they performed on the Dangerous Woman tour last year, Jesy was never out of shorts. Her go to outfit, which by the way always looked at though she was going to the beach consisted of bra top, shorts and sliders that was it. So how can this not be a inspired without a pair of ripped denim shorts. Of course to spice it up a bit I chose a blue pair, but you can go for black. Have to be ripped obviously or otherwise that isnt edgy Jesy.

Leigh

H&M Patterned kaftan: £8.99. So next we have Leigh, so what inspired this look is when she was on the Neon Lights tour and she posed next to the star sign in this Topshop floral shirt dress thingy. This looks so good it doesn`t even look like a kaftan, you can wear it as a dress or a beach cover up one of the two. Like in photo you can dress it up with a belt and some sliders.

Zara CONTRAST TUNIC WITH BOW: £29.99. This next piece is inspired by her bathrobe look at the Brit Awards this year. Now we have mentioned this item before on this blog so it must be a favourite of mine. But this isnt a bath robe or a dressing gown it`s actually a shirt dress or just a dress if you will. With the special pattern it has going on and with the tie up belt I think it looks cute, and of course it looks summery. Ideal for going shopping in with the mules i`ve included in the set. You don`t have to make much effort with this item and considering it`s Zara you`ve got a pretty good deal going on.

ASOS DESIGN mix and match crinkle tie side brazilian bikini: £10. Simple and plain black bikini, you can never go on holiday without a black bikini and that`s what Leigh always seems to do. It`s a staple and versatile, you can swap the black bikini top with that red bikini top of yours..Mixing and matching as they say. 

ASOS Moon River wide leg button trousers: £68. We come to one of the more expensive items of this inspired look. So way back when Leigh wore some white culottes with black buttons, I have seen quite a few white culotte pants over the last few years so it seems that trend isnt dying out anytime soon. So I thought why not pick up on that trend. These would be ideal for sightseeing, shopping, eating out whatever. With the large slit up the side you won`t be feeling hot or bothered and it`s borderline sexy...Not sure if you was going for the sexy look but you get my gist. This will be ideal with the mules and a white crop top, to be honest if I saw you I would think your rich if you were wearing this outfit. A very luxurious, relaxed feel to this outfit, I think this is a staple piece. But what do you think?

quay australia x missguided gold/smoke fade cool innit sunglasses: £45. It can`t be a inspired without sunglasses and especially for Leigh, she is known for her sunglasses and I think she has a exstensive collection of designer glasses now ranging from Dior to Prada to Gucci to Rayban. But unfortanely not many of us can afford designer like she can. But luckilly the ones she wears you can pick up for much less in a high street shop..Makes you wonder why she can`t save the pounds? The ones I have picked are similar to her Dior ones I think? I have no idea I get so mixed up between them all unless they are obvious. These are from Quay, but they have recently joined up with MissGuided for a collaboraton. However, they are still the expensive price they are so what was the point of that? If you want a really good pair of sunglasses then I recommend Quay, I love their designs personally, I don`t like sunglasses that show your eyes cause what`s the point of that if your meant to be wearing sunglasses in the first place? I wanna wear sunglasses so nobody can see what I`m looking at, I wanna look moody AF, I wanna look like Miranda Pricesley. 

ASOS MOUSE Pointed Mules: £18. Bet you can guess where I got the inspiration from ;). Mules are very much in at the moment, not Jesy`s big buckle motorcycle i`m gonna eat you up size, but the more smaller size. Gucci have recently launched a selection of mules that seemed to of gone popular and now everyone is duping and copying etc. These can go with pretty much any outfit and you can slip and slide them off whenever. Personally for me, I think mules make you look sophiscated and a lady..yes a lady, who wants to become one of those? Not me. Ok maybe they arent for everyone but if you want to look smart and regal mules are the one. Of course mules are all over the place in different styles and colours and what not, so have a look around first to find the right pair for you.

MissGuided white harness strap detail bralet: £8. It seems as though Leigh`s style staple to go to is a white bralet, it can go with anything and it doesn`t break the bank. I picked this one up from MissGuided for £8

MissGuided black crochet beaded mini dress: £35. One has noticed Leigh likes alot of black lace, netted, fishnet mesh dresses. This type of dress may not be for everyone, it`s more ideal for on the beach or Ibiza but will live. The model makes a great example of a beach cover up with it, might catch a few fish with it aswell when you go into the sea. You can also get this in white. 

Perrie

Topshop Rope Sandals: £22. Ah man Perrie was the easiest one for me, mostly inspired by her recent holiday to Greece I came up with loads. She likes the Grecian, boho and hippie style, the crochet and lace style, mostly teamed with the creams, beiges and whites. Also her style similarly crosses over with Leigh sometimes, so some of Leigh`s items could also go with Perrie and vice versa. Anyway first thing on agenda. Now rope sandals are pretty much Perrie`s style, hers looked much cuter then these but will go with it. You can find these type of shoes anywhere else like ASOS or or or or...anywhere else. Maybe for cheaper aswell.

Miss Selfridge Natural Circle Straw Tote Bag: £25. Continuing on with the boho, grecian theme we have a bag! Yes a big round bag that looks like your dinner table. These straw bags are very on trend, especially the ones that are a odd shape. Plenty of room to store your essentials in and maybe your boyfriend when he gets annoying. Believe it or not these actually come in bigger sizes, like way bigger.

Prettylittlething BREANNA WHITE TIE FRONT FLARE SLEEVE CROCHET LACE DRESS£ 25. Need I say more? Very Perrie. Also contender for cutest dress.

MissGuided white lace trim gathered hem crop top: £15. Again inspired by a outfit from Perrie`s travels, still can`t find that top she wore as it`s years old. But this will do. Great for sightseeing, shopping, bird watching, pizza making, milking the goats... Very Poland Eurovision 2016 isnt it, so i`m going off topic here but it`s very milk maid like which is oddly becoming a trend. Not a fan of the puffy sleeves, but am sure if you can pull them down you can make it into a off the shoulder for that sexy feel.

ASOS DESIGN 90s metal round sunglasses in gold: £12, these have that hippy feel, that Perrie look to them.  Ideal and versatile item

Zara CROCHET HEADBAND: £2.99. People always say to accessorize, this will jazz up your outfit, make you look extra. Bargain aswell at £2.99 

Zara LACE DRESS: £29.99. No brainer this one, again ideal for shopping, sightseeing anything. Very cute piece with a flared sleeve. Not too small, not too big will flatter your figure.

H&M Patterned maxi skirt: £24.99. It has come to my attention Perrie likes to wear a maxi skirt like this one. She`s got several in her wardrobe and it completes the boho look. teamed with sandals, that milk maid top, them sunglasses from ASOS and your bossing it.

MissGuided white scallop hem knitted crochet bralet: £15

Jade

ASOS DESIGN Swing Playsuit With Button Front In Patchwork Floral Print: £25. And finally we come to Jade. Her style when she goes on holiday is very different from the rest...she`s colourful, quirky, laidback very much like my style. When she`s not on holiday, but it`s warm and humid she does like to go down the ditsy floral route. What is ditsy? Small flower patterns, hard to describe but yeah. So i`ve chosen this playsuit with the ditsy pattern, very easy to move around in, very light and breezy. Cute little vintage number.

Topshop Joni Cycling Shorts: £29. Y`all probably thinking what the hell are those again. These are the first thing I picked up and the reason why I picked them up? Jade dresses like a tomboy sometimes and I thought these suited that to a T. Not to mention they are being sold at Topshop so must be on trend. Teamed with trainers, mules, flip flops and a crop top this will be cool enough to impress your little brother.

ASOS DESIGN small cat eye fashion glasses: £12. Jade seems to of taken a liking to her own pair of retro cat eye sunglasses from PLT, So why not yourself? Very bang on trend and can come in multiple colours and also you can do a great impression of Anne Robinson...Look her up.

Adidas Court Vantage Trainers White Vapour Pink Exclusive: £59.99. Jade lives in trainers, she teams them with almost anything and that`s because she wants to be comfortable all the while. Of course you don`t have to go for the most expensive pair of trainers, a simple plain pair will do. Great for walking around in or if your hiking or running around after that idiot boyfriend of yours.

ASOS DESIGN Spot Floral Print Pom Pom High Waist Skirted Bikini Bottom: £20. This is Jade rolled into one, colourful, ditsy and quirky. Very cute as a two piece and a outfit for besides the pool. You can find the link to the top through the link.

Boohoo Slogan High Leg Crop Bikini: £16. This may be a bikini but you can style it up how you want, I view it as a top. This is inspired by Jade`s top from the Word up MV, nearly the same colour but it`s so adorable and cute. Can wear it with denim shorts, trainers and sunglasses or as a bikini.

MissGuided black sequin triangle bikini set: £25. I find Jade expresses herself more through her bikinis, mostly all the time full of sequins, colour and wackiness. I know Motel does similar bikinis but inject your wardrobe full of colour, don`t be shy!.

Topshop TALL Ditsy Print Mini Slip Dress: Sold Out. Sold out whilst posting :( Look for something similar as Jade loves these.

This post does contain affiliate links. This means if you make a purchase through these links I earn a tiny commission to keep the blog running. It does not cost you any extra.

[koigu]

Custom Colourway for Sewickley Yarns: Ms Tillie!

We love to work with our shops and to hear about our shop's events! We are so excited about our most recent collaboration with a store because we're working with a cat!

Ms Tillie is the cat of Sewickley Yarns in Sewickley Pennsylvania and she is the inspiration for a custom colourway hand-dyed by Taiu. Ms Tillie is well loved and known by all that come into the shop. Her beautiful icy blue eyes and grey, white and cream fur are the inspiration for the speckled colourway that is Koigu's Ms Tillie.

The Ms Tillie colourway will be kicked off at the Steel Valley Yarn Crawl that Sewickley Yarns is participating in. The owners of the shop told us more:

"Sewickley Yarns participates every year in the Steel Valley Yarn Crawl: it is an event that the local yarn stores collaborate on and it runs from August 3 through August 12 this year. The event showcases 11 local stores in the Pittsburgh region: we all carry different stock and have a different focus. The event draws several hundred participants and many people make the trip out to Western Pennsylvania to take part. Participants visit all the stores, have chances to win prize baskets with some wonderful knitting and crocheting yarns and accessories. Everyone gets a great project bag and a free pattern for participating.  

Our store is known for, among other things, our huge selection of Koigu fingering weight- we have a display that we call our Koigu Bar- all the choices that you could possible want in a rainbow of great colors.  (We may be the only purveyor of Koigu in Western Pennsylvania- I think we have the largest selection of Koigu, at least). You have done a custom color for us before and when we were at TNNA  we decided to get another color for the Yarn Crawl this year. We have a beautiful cat, Ms.Tillie, a Ragdoll cat that has recently become a member of our household, whose colors are very neutral and subtle- we thought that these colors would be a perfect inspiration for a custom colorway for the Yarn Crawl.  As usual, Taiu has created a beautiful reflection of Ms. Tillies look- and our customers will be adding this special skein to their collections for sure!"

Shop owner, Robin, loves her cat very much and said, "I know that cat stories about other people’s cats are pretty tedious... but here is Ms. Tillie’s story:

Ms. Tillie is about 6 years old, and spent her formative years as the resident cat at a small inn on Block Island, Rhode Island.  One of our family members, Claire, was assistant manager for 3 summers (the Inn closes in the winter), and they formed a special bond. Ms.Tillie would follow Claire around the property as she went about her daily duties. We had Ms. Tillie the past 2 winters, and this year, because of a change in ownership of the property which did NOT include Ms. Tillie, we have become her permanent family. Ms. Tillie does not like to knit, she does not care about yarn, she won’t sit on anyone’s lap, she is, unfortunately a great huntress, and her spirit animal is Audrey Hepburn. She is sophisticated, beautiful, and knowledgeable, just like our customers! "

[eatbreathewrite]

The Adventures of Todd and Granny

(Alternatively: “I Saw Granny Ethel with the Devil”)

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V

Grocery Store

Todd the demon is a he, now, if only because Granny Ethel insists upon using copious ‘Dear boy, keep trying’ and ‘Atta boy!’ critiques to varying degrees depending on how well his needlework, crochet, and knitting attempts progress.

Gender isn’t a concept the demon concerned himself with before. If Todd had been, say, a girl named Tonya, he supposes he’d be a she instead. If Todd had been gender-neutral and properly communicated with his grandmother, he supposes she would call him they or child, appropriately. Granny Ethel isn’t one to discriminate. Even when she properly wears her glasses and sees his obviously un-Todd-like appearance, only shaking her head and smiling with a good-natured “kids these days” on her lips. But he wouldn’t mind if Granny Ethel called him boy, girl, thing, or abomination, so long as she stayed happy.

Granny Ethel is a patient woman. Todd simply can’t understand why or how she’d become the black sheep of her family, especially after a full week of living with her hospitality. Through the constant baked goods and the modest but satisfying three-meals-a-day; the careful (oh-so-careful) dusting of trinkets and bookshelves with tiny cloths and feather dusters not fit for large claws, which he insists upon doing while she looks on in worry before brewing more coffee; the midday television re-run breaks spent sealing cash donations into envelopes and discussing human rights issues instead of watching old shows, he simply can’t think of her as anything but a paragon of her kind.

It’s a problem with them, he concludes. Not her.

It isn’t a decision he makes lightly.

Spending such a brief time with her, he’s already learned so much more about humans than he ever would have cared to know, beyond perceiving them as vessels or a means to an end. There is much suffering in the world—sometimes even more than that in Hell—but there is also kindness.

He’s known that, but he witnesses it first hand during their first trip outside of Granny Ethel’s home.

“Come, now, Todd, we have much shopping to do. I’m afraid my pantry isn’t stocked appropriately for the upcoming food donation drive and I can’t just skip it this month.”

Todd remembers addressing an envelope to the local food bank—most people would stop there, figuring their good deed was done.

“I also have to stock up on this week’s groceries. Feel free to buy whatever you want, dear. I can cook anything, you know! At least, I try. I suppose you’d like some snacks, too. But I am so glad you’re here; think of all the bags we can carry between the two of us!”

There is no car in Granny Ethel’s driveway, or a garage to store it. He wonders how they’re going to make it to the grocery store as he waits for her to lock the door behind them, as she hobbles down the two small concrete steps with her cane in hand.

It isn’t until she’s halfway down the sidewalk that he realizes they’re walking. In public.

An old crone in black and a demon at her side, wearing a handmade shawl so lovingly stitched with various, terrifying occult symbols.

He isn’t the only one who sees a problem with this—the neighbor’s dog, a small, bug-eyed thing, yaps indignantly at them from the front lawn as it bounces around the dewy grass at its owner’s feet, soon erupting in warning yowls and howls, before falling silent mid-yip when Todd locks eyes with it. The neighbor—Maurice, if he remembers Granny Ethel’s gossip correctly—stands frozen, watering can dangling limp from his hand as he overwaters the begonias at his feet, mouth hanging open in undignified disbelief.

“Good morning, Maurice!” Granny Ethel calls with unmitigated cheer, and a hint of pride. “Nice morning, isn’t it? Oh! Have you met my wonderful grandson Todd? He finally came to visit! We’re going shopping now. Will you watch my house?”

Maurice simply stares, dumb with shock.

Halfway down the block, another neighbor’s car brakes with a squeal before they make it out of the driveway and they stick their head out of the window to gape.

Shutters crack open. Curtains are shoved aside.

Before Todd knows it, they are the cul-de-sac’s center of attention.

Granny Ethel doesn’t pay it any mind and continues obliviously on, waving to each face in turn as those faces pale, yet hers remains rosy.

“My, such a busy day today. I haven’t seen everyone out like this since the Fourth of July block party. Oh, if you’re still here during summer, Todd, we should definitely take part. Maybe we should start knitting an American flag for the occasion. What do you think?”

He can only nod.

They make it to the grocery store without incident—aside from the broken fire hydrant caused by a distracted driver and the one, single person who ran away screaming, and the handful that crossed themselves, and the one person bold enough to snap a picture with their phone before Todd grabbed it from their hands and threw it while Granny Ethel wasn’t looking, too distracted with how well the city’s roadside flowers were blooming—and Todd, ever the gentledemon, takes a small shopping cart from its line and trails behind Granny Ethel as she consults the list taken from her purse.

As expected, those within the store stop and stare. Even the calming elevator music jolts to a pause.

A young man in an employee vest, who looks high, shoots Todd the demon-horn hand sign and smiles before swaggering away to the frozen food aisle, and the manager meekly approaches them, skirting around a fresh fruit display.

“Ma’am, is there—is there something I can—do you need help?” he asks, sweating from his receding hairline to his neck as he tugs at his collar and straightens his frumpy tie.

“Oh! I’m so glad you asked. I didn’t see any sales circulars by the door—what kind of specials are on right now? Particularly on things like pizzas and cereals and whatever else young men like to eat.” Granny Ethel leans in close to the man, close enough to loudly whisper, “See, my grandson here is a quiet, shy boy despite his appearance, and I don’t think he’d ask me himself, but I bet he’d love to get some junk food to snack on between meals.”

The manager’s eyes widen, blood-shot, as he looks to Todd, who only smiles—which comes off as terrifying, he’s certain, with all the sharp teeth and red eyes involved.

“S-SURE! Junk food. Right. Um—uh, w-well, I think there’s a BOGO—buy one get one free—deal on the frozen pizzas. Uh…most cereals are marked down right now…th-there’s a sale on potato chips…hot dogs…” His voice trails off, too burdened with trembles and fear as he continues to hold Todd’s gaze. “And—you know, I’m sure some other employee can help you, ma’am. I’m not one anymore as of this moment. I QUIT.” That said, he yanks the flimsy plastic nametag from his shirt and runs for the door, followed by half of the shoppers who abandon their carts and drop their baskets, scattering groceries everywhere.

Granny Ethel watches him go, then sighs. “He must have been overworked and stressed. I almost walked out on a job a long time ago for the same reasons, but I needed it. You be careful of corporate America, Todd.”

He takes her words to heart, and he fully agrees.

Shoppers that remain in the grocery mart avoid them at all costs as they meander through the frozen food section, the bread aisle, the junk food corner—and Granny Ethel pays them no mind, filling the cart to the brim with refills of groceries she needs back at home and treats she thinks Todd needs more of in his life. He supposes he does, if she says he does. Far be it from him to contradict her adolescent-savvy wisdom.

Even so, the single shopping cart is far too small for all of the spoils—halfway through the shopping list, he finds them in need of another. It isn’t an issue. Many are left scattered, abandoned, around almost every corner. By the end of the list, both carts are full to the brim, and Granny Ethel is simply beaming.

The checkout lines are deserted—they have their pick. Although only one station is manned by a clerk, and it greatly narrows their choice.

As Todd wheels the two shopping carts to the register, he recognizes the young employee from before, who once again shoots him the demon-horn hand symbol.

“Love your poncho, dude,” Sam (as his nametag reads) comments with a bit of a tired drawl, and there are dark shadows under his eyes as expected from an overworked youth on minimum wage, but he is otherwise energetic, quickly scanning each of the items set on the conveyor belt, and smiling at demon and old woman in turn. “Did the little lady here knit that for you?”

“Crocheted!” Granny Ethel corrects with a grin, preening like a proud parakeet. “It does suit him, doesn’t it? Of course, I would never make something that didn’t suit my dear grandson. He must always be well-dressed.”

“You seem like a really supportive gramma. That’s cool. When I was in my super hardcore death metal phase, mine just dragged me to church every Sunday.” A digital beep accompanies nearly every word as he skillfully rings up each grocery down the line.

“Oh, I would never do that. Mainly because I no longer belong to a church. And also because Todd seems so averse to discussing Bible passages, so I never force him.”

At this, Todd gives a wry smile. He places the final handful of groceries onto the conveyor belt and sidles around Granny to the other side of the checkout, bagging the groceries that have already been scanned. It seems the official bag boy has fled in fright.

“I can imagine. Never one for religion, myself. Oh, and you’re eligible for the senior citizen’s discount, so let me just…” Sam pauses a moment to key in a code on the register and it dings. “Aaand, there. Your total comes out to $204.56. Stocking up for the winter already? It’s only March.”

“Oh, dear, no. Half of this is for the food drive!” Granny Ethel chuckles good-naturedly as she leans her cane against the counter and digs through her small pocketbook and produces a checkbook, then dives back in to search for her favorite pen.

Sam turns to Todd while awaiting payment. “By the way, dude, that costume is killer. I’ve never seen anything so realistic, with the added bonus that you scared the boss away! Totally made my day. My week, even.”

Todd gives a nod, happy to be of service, even if it isn’t a costume. He can’t exactly say it aloud. Perhaps one day he’ll learn how to speak English coherently, but for now nonverbal cues work just fine.

Finally, Granny Ethel finds her pink, plastic jewel-encrusted ballpoint pen and makes out a check to DeVille-Mart, even going so far as to take one of the heavier paper bags for herself, never one to make Todd carry all of the groceries himself. “You have a wonderful day, young man. Thank you.”

“Y’all have a great day, too, Ma’am.” Sam offers a toothy smile, and it seems sincere enough as he sees them off with a lazy wave “Hope to be seeing you shop here again.”

Todd isn’t so sure they’ll ever return once upper management hears about this visit, but it’s nice to know they are accepted by at least one individual.

“Now, Todd, let’s get to the food bank. We have such a long day ahead of us. But there’s a reward at the end of it—I bought ingredients specifically for chocolate turtle brownies!”

If the visit to the food bank is in any way similar to this excursion—and it will be, he decides, as yet another gawking driver’s car slow-collides with the corner vending machine when they pass through the automatic doors—they have a long day ahead of them, indeed.

[corrahdarling]

The Cure - Ch. 5 - The Worst Thing

TITLE OF STORY: The Cure CHAPTER NUMBER/TITLE/ONE SHOT: Chapter 4 of ? AUTHOR: loveCorrah WHICH TOM/CHARACTER: Actor!Tom and OFC Olivia GENRE:  Romance, Angst, Smut FIC SUMMARY: After Tom has to take his sick niece to the pediatrician, he strikes up a fancy for the beautiful Doctor. The more he finds out about Olivia, the more he wants to know. How will he react when secrets about her past come to light? RATING: Explicit WARNINGS/TRIGGERS/AUTHORS NOTES:   FEEDBACK/COMMENTS:  If you have yet to watch our Tom in Coriolanus, please do so! It really is spectacular! Check out the first half here.  Unfortunately, the link I have for the second half no longer works. :( Feedback is always wanted and valued!  <3C

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            After an enormous turkey sandwich with every vegetable imaginable on it, Livi plopped down on her couch appreciating the feeling of her stomach being so full. That was the best meal she had eaten in a long time, and she mentally scolded herself for not taking better care of her body.               She flipped through the channels for what seemed like forever before deciding to watch a movie, instead. ‘The Notebook,’ it was! Livi was truly a romantic at heart, and hoped that one day she’d have a relationship like those you see in movies… but that time was not now.             She pulled her crocheted blanket up over her, and was fully engrossed in the movie she had now seen 1,423,653 times. It had come to her favorite part of the movie, where Noah and Allie had just gotten out of their canoe and were kissing each other passionately in the pouring rain.             Suddenly, Livi’s fingers went to her own lips. She just now remembered what had happened last night… Tom had kissed her. How could she have forgotten that? Well, she knew how she had forgotten… too much whisky. She groaned as she clutched her head and closed her eyes, trying to picture what had happened the night before.             She remembered that Tom had lunged at her and kissed her, and she recalled the fire that she felt in that kiss. He quickly pulled away and refused to go any further because she had been drinking. Most men wouldn’t have done that. At least, Livi didn’t know many men that would have done that. Her fingers were still resting on her soft lips, when her phone rang. Miles.             “Hello?” She answered, angry that he had pulled her from her daydream.            “Hey, Livi.”            “Hi, Miles.”            “Were you sleeping?”            “Nope… not sleeping…” Just daydreaming.            “I just wanted to check on you, Liv. After everything that happened at the hospital.”             “I’m okay, Miles… really.”             “Hmm… okay. What do you say we run out a get a drink? So you can get some fresh air?”             “Oh… no… definitely no alcohol. And how do you know that I haven’t already been out getting some fresh air?”             “Because I know you, and I know how you handle things. Why don’t we meet at that little coffee shop that we like? The weather’s pretty nice… it’s just raining lightly.”              She supposed that going to get coffee with Miles would be better than laying around in her apartment being a slob. “Fine. Meet you there at 4?”              “Great! See you there.”              Livi shook her head as she hung up the phone. Miles had become a good friend to her over the time she had been in London, but sometimes he had really bad timing.             She got up and took a shower, scrubbing her body with her Amazing Grace body wash, and thoroughly washing her brunette locks. She could only imagine what she smelled like after a night of drinking.             She slipped into a pair of thick, black leggings and an oversized grey sweater that hung off one shoulder showing a bit of skin, and slid her feet into her favorite royal purple wellies. She didn’t need much makeup, but she applied a layer of tinted moisturizer and a red stain on her lips and cheeks. With a coat of mascara, she was ready to go.              It didn’t take long to make it to the coffee shop, and as she approached the cute building she saw Miles waiting for her outside. He looked nice in his dark jeans, white t-shirt, and grey woolen coat. His hair was up in a messy bun, and Livi wondered how he ever got his messy buns to look so pretty. That was a talent that she had yet to accomplish. She giggled at the thought, as she greeted him. 

           Miles pulled her into a tight hug, and she felt like she was fully encompassed by him because he was so huge. “Hey, Livi.”            “Hi, Miles.” She smiled up at him as they separated.            “I’ve already got us a table inside, and I ordered you one of those fancy American white chocolate latte things that you love.”            She giggled. “Thanks. Did you order me extra foam?”            “Of course I did.”            “Great.” She said as he led her to a quaint table in the corner of the room.             He took his coat off, and draped it over the back of his chair, before pulling Livi’s chair out for her.             “Thanks, Miles.”             “So, did you get any sleep last night?”             “Well… not really last night. But, I did get some rest this morning.”             “Hmm…” Miles smiled. “Were you up all night because of the man that we found on your car last night?”             Livi sighed. “Yes, as a matter of fact-”             “Livi! You and Tom Hiddleston?” He hissed.             “Shhh! Miles, it wasn’t anything like that. We played MarioKart.”             “MarioKart, huh? You had Tom Hiddleston in your flat… all to yourself… and all you offered him was MarioKart?” He raised his eyebrows in a joking manner.              “Hush, Miles. We had both been drinking… he kissed me, but that’s as far as it went. He was a complete gentleman.”              “That’s good to hear. When I meet this guy, I need to ask him for his autograph. My fourteen-year old niece is positively obsessed with him.”              “Are you serious?” Livi smiled.              “Mmm-hmm. She has his posters all over her walls and even has his voice as her text tone. Something about a ‘mewling quim.’ I don’t know, I haven’t seen the movies.”              “Oh, wow.” Livi said, unbelieving.              “You know that he’s a big star, right? Like a really big star?”              “I guess I didn’t realize just how big.”              The waitress brought their coffees and some chocolate scones, and the pair talked more about the night before.              “I wanted to make sure that you were okay after last night. I never should have put you in that position. You’re an amazing paediatrician- one of the best I’ve ever seen… and you were being very gracious to help us out in A&E. I wasn’t prepared for last night, but I shouldn’t have put you through that. I’m the one that’s in charge of the surgical suite, so it’s all my fault. I’m sorry, Livi.”             “It’s fine, Miles, really. It happens… I’m sure it won’t be the last, unfortunately. It’s part of our job.”             He shrugged as Livi felt her phone vibrate in her bag. When she pulled it from the leather bag, she saw a certain actor’s smiling face on the screen.             “Is it Loki?” Miles asked, smiling.             “Shh!” She shushed him again, before answering. “Hello?”             “Good afternoon, Olivia.”             “Hi, Tom. How are you?”             “I could be better, darling.”             “What’s the matter?” She asked, brows furrowing.             “I was rehearsing a few moments ago, and I butted heads with Hadley. I believe I could have hurt my stitches, as my forehead’s bleeding quite a lot.”            “Oh, Tom…”            “I know, darling, I’m so sorry. Are you where you could swing by the Donmar and take a look at it? I don’t believe that I have time to come to you, as I have a performance in a couple of hours.”            “Well, I’m at a coffee shop in Shoreditch, so I’m not that far. I’ll be there shortly.”            “Thank you, my dear Olivia. You’ll have to send me a bill for all these house calls.”            She giggled as she could hear his smile through his words. “No big deal. See you in a few minutes.”             “What was that all about?” Miles asked.             “I’ve got to run to the Donmar Warehouse and take a look at Tom’s head. I stitched it yesterday, but it sounds like he’s busted a stitch.”             “Ooh! Can I come?” He asked, hopefully.             “Well… I suppose. You just have to promise to be quiet.”             She hoped that it wouldn’t upset Tom by letting Miles come with her. After all, it’s not like she and Tom were a couple, so it shouldn’t matter.             The pair made their way to her small car, and she laughed as she watched Miles nearly fold himself up to get into it. This car was just not made for tall people. Thankfully, they didn’t have to go too far.             Livi parked in the same exact spot that she parked in yesterday. She grabbed her doctor’s bag out of the back and Miles began to follow her up the long sidewalk to the Donmar. He quickly spotted the bevy of people at the stage door.            “What in the world are all these people waiting for?”            Livi eyed the large group and knew exactly who they were. “I think those are Tom’s fans. They’re waiting for him to come out after the performance. I think he signs autographs every night.”            “It must be horrible to have beautiful women waiting on you for hours… just to get your signature.”             “Are you jealous?”             “I believe I am.”             Livi laughed as they passed through the crowd, and she knocked loudly on the door. Before the door was opened, a slew of questions were hurtled their way.            “You’re here again? Are you Tom’s girlfriend?”            “Is he still sick?”            “Oh my God! Are you Chris Hemsworth?”            “Please tell Tom that I love him!”            The door finally opened and the large security guard, James, allowed them in. “Hello, Dr. Beckett.”             “Hi there, James. You doing alright?”             “I think so. You know where Tom’s room is -- go ahead.”             She nodded, and she and Miles walked down the long hall to Tom’s dressing room. She peeked her head in, and Tom was sitting in his theatre chair in front of the mirror, his body makeup had just been done, so he was sitting there topless, and for a moment she was preoccupied by looking at his muscular naked torso. In one hand, he held a thick script that he was reading, and with the other he was pressing a piece of gauze to his forehead. She could see the red liquid seeping through the gauze lightly, and knew that he must have truly hurt himself again.             “Tom?” She said softly as she entered the room slowly.             “Oh, hello darling. I’m so glad that you’re here.”             She snickered. “I bet.” She gestured to the man behind her. “This is Miles Blake. He’s a surgeon and a good friend of mine. I hope it’s okay that he tagged along. We were having coffee when you called.”             “Ah, yes. Delighted to meet you, Miles.” Tom placed the script on the counter, stood, and crossed the floor quickly with his long legs. The men shook hands, and Tom looked at the man strangely. “You know, Thor has an alter-ego on Earth… his name is also Dr. Blake... and you do look a bit like Thor.” He said, with a pseudo-suspicious tone.            “He was asked outside if he was Thor…” Livi laughed. “…and he’s a pretty good surgeon, but I don’t think he quite has the powers of Thor. He works with a scalpel, not Mjolnir.”            “Ah, you know Norse mythology?” Tom turned his attention to Livi.            “I studied it a bit in college. Just one class.” She shrugged. “Let’s look at that head, Tom.”            “Yes, the head… I’m sorry, Olivia. It was an accident.” He jumped back up into his theatre chair.            “It’s fine, but the more we mess with this wound, the larger the scar will be. Plus, I don’t want you to be in pain. Let’s see what’s under that bandage.”                 She moved in between his legs, and the close proximity to him made her heart begin to beat faster. She kept picturing their kiss in her head, and she could almost feel his hands on her face as he placed his soft lips against hers. She wondered if he remembered it too?             She slowly pulled the edge of the bandage up, and winced as she saw his wound. “Oh, Tom. I was afraid of this. You’ve popped a stitch!”            “Shit. I’m sorry, darling. That’s why it hurt so bad.”            “Mmm-hmm. I’m going to have to replace that stitch… that means I’ll have to deaden it again.”            She watched Tom glance over to Miles, who had taken a seat on the couch, and whispered “do what you must.” Livi laughed. He was obviously trying to be brave in front of Miles, but she knew that Tom hated needles and she’d try to make it as painless as possible.             “Okay, give me a minute to get my things together.”             He nodded as he watched her pull a bundle of items from her bag and lay out her implements of torture in front of him on the counter. After she pulled her latex gloves on, she began to clean his forehead with sterile water, making sure there wasn’t any debris in his wound, and retrieved the bottle of lidocaine and needle from the counter.             “I’m using the tiniest needle that I have, so it shouldn’t be too bad. I won’t have to use as much as last time either.”             Tom nodded as he watched her draw up the clear liquid into the syringe and place the container of lidocaine back onto the counter.             “Okay, Tom,” She said, as she moved closer in between his legs. “Are you ready?”              She felt his large hands drift to her hips and slowly pull her closer before allowing them to meet at the small of her back.              “I’m ready now.” He grinned.              She was taken aback by his brazenness. With a huff, she inserted the needle for the first time, and when she inserted it for the second, he whispered to her again. “Olivia, is he your boyfriend?”              “No, Tom.” She pulled the needle from his skin for the final time as he released her.              “Good, because that would make my job much harder.”              “And what job would that be?” She asked with a quizzical furrow of her brows.              “If you can be secretive, so can I.” Tom winked as she ran the curved needle through his skin, finally pulling the thread through and tying it off, making a perfect stitch.              “There. Let me put a clean bandage on it.”               She gently patted his forehead with a sterile piece of gauze to make sure it was all dry, and placed a new small bandage over his two stitches.               “So, do we still have a date for dinner tomorrow night?”               “Hmm... I don’t know about that… ” She grinned.               “Come now, you must let me repay you for all this work!”               “Well, I suppose.”               “Lovely.” He raised his voice to allow Miles to hear him as well. “Since you’re both here, why don’t you stay for the performance?” Tom looked at the clock on the counter. “We’re not too far from beginning… maybe you can watch it in its entirety this time, Olivia?”               “Um… Tom… I’m not really dressed for the theatre. I mean, look at me.”              “I am, darling. You’ll be the most beautiful woman in the room.”             Miles piped up. “Sure! We’ll stay! Do you think that I could get your autograph too, Tom? For my niece, she loves you.”             “Miles! Shush!” Livi’s face began to blush from embarrassment.             “No, no, it’s quite alright. Anything for a friend of Olivia’s.” He smiled as he went to his backpack, and retrieved a Coriolanus theatre program. “What’s her name?”             “Eloise.”             “Ah, what a beautiful name!” He wrote for a moment, before handing the booklet to Miles.             “Thanks, Tom. I’ll be the favorite uncle now, for sure.”             “No problem. Now, go to James and he will show you to your seats.”             Miles followed Olivia, as it seemed that she knew her way around this place, and they quickly found their seats… right in the front row. The first half of the show once again took Livi’s breath away, and she hurriedly found the restroom during intermission. She didn’t want to miss one part of the second half.             As she was washing her hands, a young woman approached the sink beside her, and Livi could feel the woman staring at her in the mirror as she washed her own hands. Livi finally looked over and smiled at the woman as she washed all the suds from her hands.             “You’re that doctor, right?” The woman asked.             “I am a doctor, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m a peadiatrician.”             “No, no… I’m asking if you’re that doctor.” The woman asked with a hopeful expression.              Olivia was completely confused. “What doctor?”              “Tom’s girlfriend. I saw your picture on the internet.”               “You saw my picture on the internet?”               “Yup, last night… it’s all over Tumblr. So, are you guys together? I promise I won’t tell.”               “Um…” Olivia felt like she was going to faint from all the blood rushing to her face. “I’ve gotta go.” She hurried from the bathroom and through the throngs of people in line for the loo, and through the front door of the Donmar, finally leaning against the brick of the large building. She hadn’t thought to get a coat, and it was freezing out here since the sun had gone down.                She tried to catch her breath as she pulled her cell phone from the pocket of her leggings, and with trembling hands she typed ‘google.’ She almost didn’t want to type her name in the search bar, but if what this girl said was true she needed to know. As quickly as she could with shaking hands, she typed ‘Olivia Beckett and Tom Hiddleston.’ She watched her breath come from between her lips in foggy condensation, as the next screen loaded. What she saw next surprised her. There in the search results, was page after page of her picture. Someone must have heard that she asked for Tom at the stage door of the Donmar and had taken her photo quickly right as she looked toward the camera.  The headlines ranged from ‘Who is this mystery brunette visitor to the set of Coriolanus?’ to ‘Is this the first picture of Tom Hiddleston’s new love?’ to ‘How long will this new girlfriend last?’ People judged every inch of her, from her hair, to her face, to her body… to whether or not Tom deserved someone better.            Olivia began to hyperventilate and pushed the button on the side of her phone to make the screen go black. She had seen enough. She took a few deep breaths, and pulled enough courage from deep down to go back in. The performance had just begun, and she knew it would be incredibly rude and distracting to go back in there now, so she got her phone back out.

                               8:39 P.M.             Miles, bring me my bags, please.          We have to go. I’m outside. I’m sorry.                                       -O

            After a moment, she saw the large, blond man coming to the door with her leather bag thrown over his shoulder, and her doctor’s bag in his hand. With a concerned furrow of his brow, he pushed the door open and walked through.             “What’s the matter, Livi? Why are you breathing like that? Are you alright?”             “I’m fine… we just need to go. I’m not feeling well all of a sudden.”             “Oh, okay. I’m sorry. I think Tom was a little distracted when I walked out with your bags.”             “I’m sure he was… I’ll drive you back to your car at the coffee shop, and then I’m going home.”             “Fine, fine. What’s wrong, Livi?”             “Nothing, Miles! Stop asking!” She hissed as she walked in front of him. Normally, he’d lead the way because his legs were so long, but there was no way he was catching up with her tonight.              She sped back to the coffee shop, and dropped Miles off at his car. “See you at the hospital Monday?” He asked as he ducked his head back in her car.              “Yeah, yeah… whatever.” She brushed him off quickly.              He got the point because he let her go. He knew that something had happened but he didn’t know what. She was fine before she went into the bathroom, but something had happened in there, but he had no way of knowing what.              Olivia arrived home quickly, making her way into her apartment and turning all three of the locks on the door behind her. She checked all the windows, making sure they were locked, before pulling their drapes completely closed. She felt guilty for skipping out on Tom again, but she had to this time.             She changed clothes, and slipped into a pair of soft grey and white striped shorts, a white v-neck t-shirt and a cozy, open-front, grey cardigan. She fumbled through her drawer before she found her favorite thigh-high cable socks that she pulled on to keep her legs warm.            She plopped down on the couch, and flipped on the television, finding absolutely nothing to watch. With a huff, she turned it off and threw the remote onto her rug. She slid down onto the couch until she was fully inundated with fluffy pillows and her knit blanket. She pulled her favorite pillow, which was shaped like a Kawaii cactus that she had picked up in Japan, to her chest and hugged it tightly.           She was terrified that her photo was all over the internet, for more reasons than one, and she hadn’t thought about that happening just for being friends (or more?) with Tom.           She laid there for a couple of hours just staring at the lazily swirling ceiling fan, before her phone rang. Without even moving, she could look over at the coffee table and see Tom’s face shining on the lit-up screen. No doubt, he was calling to check on her, and to see what happened. She watched as the phone moved in a patterned circle from the vibrations of his call.          She covered her face with her pillow and let it ring… she couldn’t talk to him right now. For the first time in a long time, she didn’t feel safe, and she just wanted to lock herself in her apartment, not speaking to anyone. The phone began to vibrate again and the soft bells of her ringtone echoed in her ear. Tom again. It was easy to ignore his calls with the thoughts that were forming in her head.         There were things that no one knew about her… things that could possibly be uncovered if someone dug deep enough… things that could put her life in danger if they came to light. She’d have to leave London and go to a new assignment now, she had no choice. She knew she’d have to break the news to Tom the next night at dinner, and now she had exactly 20 hours to decide how to tell him…

[knittingknerdy]

Knitworthy

Prompt/Summary: A little something for all of my knitters out there (and crocheters)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: fluff in a knit hat

Word Count: 1347

Author’s Note:

Movie night was over and everyone but Bucky and you had gone to their rooms.  You had insisted you would go to bed after one more row.  That was about 30 minutes ago.  Bucky hadn’t moved from his spot on the couch, but you could see his eyelids drooping.  Finally, you had made it to a point where you would need to switch to needles that were still in your room.  You stuffed the hat into your bag and stood quietly.  

Bucky’s eyes opened when you stood up.  “Oh.  Sorry I fell asleep.  The sound of your needles was kind of soothing.”

You smiled.  “Goodnight Bucky.” Suddenly, you had a thought. “Bucky, I haven’t made you anything before.  Would you like me to?”  

Bucky looked up at you and the look in his eyes made you curse mentally.  You were always making things for your teammates.  Some of them were a bit more demanding than others. Cough cough, Natasha.  But you couldn’t believe you hadn’t made anything for Bucky.  Of course he had never brought it up.  Now, he was looking at you like you had offered him a basket full of puppies.

“Come on, I have some yarn in my room.  You can pick what you like.”  You grab his hand and pull him down the hall.  

You let Bucky in and show him over to your knitting nook.  It was really just a giant, overstuffed armchair with a cabinet for your yarn.  Bucky stood with his mouth agape when you opened up the cabinet.  

“I don’t have a ton.  I’ve tried to be better about not buying yarn without a project.  But sometimes it is all just too pretty.  It just means I have plenty on hand for times like this.  What do you think?”  You turned to him with a smile.  

Bucky looks between you and the cabinet with confusion and a tiny bit of panic.  It looks like he might need a bit of guidance.  

“Would you like a hat or a scarf?” You decide to start simple.

“Hat.”

“Ok.”  You reach up and grab a blue skein of yarn of the shelf and hold it out to him. “What about this color?  It’s wool.”

Bucky had been reaching out to take the skein, but hesitated when you said it was wool.  “Wool is itchy.”

You raised an eyebrow and smirked. “My wool isn’t.”  Without thinking, you stepped forward and brushed it over his cheek.  You blushed when he grabbed your hand.  You stumbled backwards and dropped the yarn.

Bucky grabbed it from the floor and hummed in appreciation when he squeezed it gently. “You’re right, it is soft.”

--

It only took you about a week to finish the hat.  You tossed it at him from across the room when you finished up weaving in the ends during another movie night 

Bucky smiled and pulled it on.  It was a bit slouchy, but it would fit all of his hair if he pulled it back.  When he walked over and gave you a big, warm hug to say thank you, you marveled at how well the blue matched his eyes.  

--

Bucky wandered into the yarn shop.  He was there to buy Y/N a Christmas present.  When the door opened, his senses were overwhelmed by the color.  The room was full, floor to ceiling, with yarn.  He now knew what you meant about not being able to resist.  But Bucky had no idea where to start.  

“Hello, how can I help you?” The shopkeeper was sitting behind the counter.  She was able to knit while she talked too.  Bucky wondered if it was something every knitter could do.  

“Uh, I have a, uh, friend I want to buy yarn for.  For Christmas. But…” Bucky trailed off as he looked around.  He heard a small chuckle as the woman set her knitting down.  

“It’s all a bit overwhelming?” She asked.

Bucky nodded his head.  “Oh, but she made me this hat.  I think she liked the yarn.  Maybe something like this?”  He took the hat off of his head and held it out to the woman as she approached.  

She took it from him and gently gave it a squeeze.  “Oh, I think that is Malabrigo.  Your friend has good taste.  She must like you a lot.  Let me show you where it is.”

Bucky was shocked that she was able to identify the yarn from just a squeeze.  But when she led him to the yarn, he had to admit she was probably right.  Bucky selected two skeins.  One was a blue very similar to the hat she had made him.  The other was a riot of colors, purples and greens and greys.  It reminded him of Y/N.

--

“Oh my goodness, Bucky!  Thank you.  How did you know what yarn I used for your hat?” You asked as you pulled the skeins from the bag.  

Bucky blushed and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I asked the lady at the shop to help.  She knew what the yarn was when I showed her the hat.  How did she do that?”

You laughed.  “It’s a pretty popular yarn.  So soft.  I love working with it.  But you didn’t have to replace the skein I used for your hat.”

Bucky blushed even more. “Oh, I know.  I just thought you might make me another one.”  He mumbled in a rush.  

“Of course.  You are very knitworthy.” You say with a smile before leaning in for a hug.

--

The next time Bucky sees you knitting, it doesn’t look like a hat.  

“What are you working on?” He asks, sitting next to you on the couch.  

“Oh, I’m making a blanket.” You hold up the needle showing off how many stitches are on there. “It’s a present.”

Bucky’s face falls slightly at the thought of you spending so much time on a gift for someone.  He shouldn’t be jealous, but it pools in his stomach anyway.  He smiles when you look up at him, but can’t get rid of the disappointment that fills him.  

--

Over the next month, you don’t work on much else.  You have smaller projects that you carry around, but you really dedicate yourself to finishing the blanket.  Movie nights are spent watching the progress of your needles and marveling at the blanket taking shape.  

Until one night you aren’t.  

“Where’s the blanket?”  Bucky hopes that you just didn’t feel like working on it.  A small part of him still hoped the blanket was for him, but if you had already given it away, that hope would be crushed.

“Oh, it is done.”  You smile.  “And just in time.”  As you turn to face the screen, you miss the smile fade from Bucky’s face.  

The group finishes the first movie and you shiver in your seat.

“Tony, why is the air conditioning on arctic blast?  It’s still cold out.”  You whisper loudly and are met with a chorus of shushes.  

Bucky leans forward to whisper in your ear.  “You can snuggle closer if you’re cold.”

His voice so close to your ear makes you jump slightly.  You turn to face him, but suddenly have a brilliant idea.  

“I have a better idea.  I’ll be right back.”  You hop up and run out of the room and miss the crestfallen look on Bucky’s face.  

Bucky was lost in his thoughts and jumps slightly when you sit down on the couch and tuck yourself under his arm.  You release the bundle you’re holding in your arms and spread the blanket over the two of you.  

“I thought this was a present?” Bucky looks down at you in confusion.  

“It is.  It’s for your birthday.  I know it’s a bit early.  But I’m cold.”  You smile as you watch the realization dawn on his face.  

“Really?”

“Really.”

He leans down and presses a kiss to your lips.  His smile gets bigger as it is your turn to be shocked.

“Thank you,” he whispers.

“Oh my God, be quiet!  Some of us are trying to watch a movie!”

Tag List:  @marvel-lucy @buckybarnesisalittleshit @pleasecallmecaptain @eyeofdionysus @nikkitia7 @geminiloveca @bovaria @imagine-assembling-the-avengers @escapee-21 @jarnesbrnes @actuallyasgardian @avengermama @marvel-ash @marvelfanfichq  @theoneandonlysaucymo @sebbytrash @beccaanne814-blog @palaiasaurus64 @marvelfictrashcan @backpackfullofplums @redgillan @brighterlights @buckyywiththegoodhair @buckysberrie @heismyhunter @swtltlmrvlgrl @midnightloverslie @feelmyroarrrr @lillianfromaccounting @darkchocolaterey @emilyevanston @mewsiex @winterbombyourface @mrshopkirk @hellomissmabel @okchris @ailynalonso15  @fvckingbuckyandsteve @Sarahmatthews7 @always-an-evans-addict @weirdlyobsessedreader @lilasiannerd @lady-thor-foster @pcterpvrker @iluvyewman-blog @bionic-buckyb @whatsbetterthanfantasy @creideamhgradochas

Did all of my tags just work?  It’s a Friday miracle. 

[pitviperofdoom]

BNHA, Summer Stars, 7/?

Summary: It’s been judged safe to send the students of UA home to their families for the first three weeks of summer, much to the relief of everyone whose name isn’t Todoroki Shouto. Luckily, Midoriya has a solution for him, and Midoriya Inko has a lot of love to give.

AO3

“Hi, Mom.”

She sat crosslegged on her bed with a book in her lap, chin tucked in as she read. Her hair was as snow-white as ever, combed to a shine and tucked neatly behind her ear. At the sound of Shouto’s voice, she looked up, and her face lit up with delight. “Shouto!” She didn’t get up, but slid forward on the bed until her feet could drop to the floor.

There was already a chair waiting for him, and he dragged it over so that when he sat down, their knees were nearly touching. “How’ve you been?”

“Not bad.” She reached out, with some hesitance but far less than she once had, and touched the side of his face gently. Her smile was warm. “You’re a lifesaver, you know. This place never gets any new books. I’d read everything at least a dozen times over before you started bringing me more.”

“I brought even more today,” he said, indicating the bag he’d set down by his feet. “And something new—I thought you might like something to do with your hands, so. If you’ve ever wanted to learn how to crochet…”

The corners of her eyes crinkled in amusement. “Shouto, are you trying to coax free sweaters out of your mother now?” He blinked, eyes widening at the gentle teasing note in her voice, and found his face mirroring her smile all on its own.

“Just trying to keep you comfortable,” he said. “I never know what entertainment is like here.”

“Mostly TV, books, and the occasional craft day,” she said lightly. “Nothing like crochet, though. Thank you—it certainly sounds interesting.” After a moment her smile faded, and she reached out again to tuck a lock of white hair behind Shouto’s ear. “I couldn’t help but notice you limping a little when you walked in. Any trouble lately?” Her eyes lingered on his for a moment, bright with worry.

“No.” He remembered the store hold-up at the beach. “Well, one thing. Nothing major, just a small fight. That wasn’t even where I hurt my foot—I just stepped on something sharp, that’s all.” He shrugged, managing a lopsided grin. “That’s what I get for walking barefoot in the ocean.”

She smiled again, her relief obvious. “You went to the beach recently?”

“Yes. We have three weeks off from school for half of summer break, so…”

“Oh.” Her face fell at that, confusing him for a moment. “So… you’re at home again?”

“I—oh! No, I’m not.” He shook his head. Of course she would be worried by that. “Father’s out of town, so I took a chance. I’ve been staying with one of my—with Midoriya.” His mother’s eyes lit up, and Shouto felt the left side of his face warm. “I’ve, um. Told you about him.”

“Quite a bit.” Her amusement was back. Shouto tried not to fidget. “Are you having fun?”

“It’s been… yes.” Shouto fidgeted again, remembering how painfully awkward he’d been acting. “It took—it’s taken some time to get used to. I’ve never really done this before.” He smiled. “But it’s been fun. Midoriya and his mother are… they’re very welcoming. They make me feel at home. And they kind of fussed when I hurt my foot. It was embarrassing, but they were both nice about it.” The gentle weight of Midoriya Inko’s hand on his shoulder had stuck with him, stilling his embarrassment whenever it came back to him.

When he looked at his mother’s face again, the smile at her mouth was a small one, but it shone far more intensely through her eyes. “That’s wonderful, Shouto,” she said softly. “I’m happy you found somewhere… safe to be.”

Shouto shrugged. “Wasn’t my idea. It’s not like home is unsafe, it’s just unpleasant. I was ready to bear it for three weeks, but then Midoriya invited me. I turned him down at first, but then Fuyumi found out and encouraged me to take him up on it.”

Her eyes crinkled again. “Good. I’m glad you kids are looking out for each other. And I’m glad your friends are looking out for you, too.” She paused, hands curling gently in her lap. “Your friend Midoriya… does he know? About… about your father? And about…” Her voice trailed off, but he could tell from the way her eyes flickered up, tinged with sadness, that she was looking at his scar again.

“He knows,” Shouto told her. “I told him, before the sports festival last year. That’s how he knew to invite me in the first place. One more time he’s helped me without being asked.” He shook his head. “Midoriya never asks. He just does it. One moment everything’s falling apart, and the next he’s just there and suddenly I know how to fix things. If he doesn’t fix them himself.”

“I think I might like to meet him sometime,” she said, laughing softly. Shouto blinked at her, surprised. “It’d be rude of me not to thank him in person.”

Shouto took this in silently for a moment, hands open in his lap. “Well, then, maybe…” He cleared his throat. “Maybe, next time I get the chance to visit you, I’ll ask him if he wants to come along.”

“Well, you do have three weeks to yourself,” she pointed out. “You know where to find me.”

“Maybe not,” Shouto murmured.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean Father’s set to come home in a few days,” Shouto replied, burying his distaste deep enough that not even a twist of the mouth showed on the surface. “Might go home then. Just so Fuyumi doesn’t get in any trouble for letting me go. He, um… he doesn’t like Midoriya very much.”

For a split second, a dark look flitted across his mother’s face. “Just like him,” she muttered. She shook her head, composing herself again. “Well… try to think hard about that choice, whether you go or not. I… know I said to look out for each other, but make sure you look out for yourself, as well.” She met his eyes solemnly. “You always were his… his favorite.” The word came out as if it tasted terrible in her mouth. “I’m just afraid for you, Shouto.”

“I know. But even if I do go home, it’s just two weeks. It’s not a big deal.” Everyone was making this out to be something serious—first Midoriya, then Fuyumi, and now Mom. It really wasn’t. Just two weeks, and what was that next to the fifteen years he’d survived before that?

“I know it doesn’t seem like it,” she told him with a fretful sigh. “But… you’ve been so happy, Shouto. When you first started visiting me, and then when you moved out of his house to live at school. You’ve been happy. I just don’t want him to take that away from you.”

Shouto leaned forward, and his mother met him halfway in a warm hug. “He won’t,” Shouto murmured into her shoulder. “He can’t. It’s like you said—I’m not alone, remember?”

Her thin, pale arms were tight around him, but he felt her nod.

---

Most hardware and sporting goods stores carried hero supplies these days. Padding, protective eyewear, and various accessories were in high demand among pro heroes, sidekicks, and students alike. Most licensed pros relied on their agencies’ support departments for equipment, but for trainees, students, and the much rarer freelance heroes who operated independently of any organization, there were places to find good gear if one knew where to look. Off-the-shelf goods weren’t as high-quality as, say, online or specialty orders, but they could do in a pinch.

Izuku was mostly here for inspiration, anyway. Anything he might need, Hatsume would be only too happy to build, but it was good to have a look around for the sake of ideas.

His belt, for example. Could he carry more while minimizing weight and volume? Was there a sturdier material? A better design? One For All meant that speed was one of his best strengths, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t cut down on bulk and wind resistance in his costume. This was more Hatsume’s area of expertise, but if he came to her with ideas, then she could build from there with less of a chance of getting any… outlandish ideas of her own.

It wasn’t until he happened to look up and see another customer looking at him funny that he realized he was muttering to himself again. Embarrassed, he ducked his head and pressed his mouth shut.

This store was part of a larger shopping center, several blocks away from the hospital where Todoroki was visiting his mother. That was Todoroki’s business, and Izuku would have been happy to let him go without tagging along, but Mom had put her foot down. Between Todoroki’s still-healing foot and the worrying news reports she’d been hearing, Mom had insisted that they stick to the buddy system. And so, as a compromise, Izuku was browsing around the shopping center while Todoroki was spending time with his mother.

In just a few days, Endeavor was due to be returning. Whether or not Todoroki would stay past that was still up in the air. It was hard to think about that, if only because just considering it made him feel like choking on… something. It didn’t feel quite like rage, nor did it feel like the distracting emotions that he could now identify as attraction.

Whatever it was, it was strong, and it was protective.

The last thing he wanted was to see his friend get hurt.

There must have been a weird look on his face, because Izuku looked up and found the customer from before looking back at him with an oddly interested expression. Izuku blinked back and turned away again, sheepish. Luckily, the man didn’t comment on it as Izuku carefully stepped past him and moved on.

In the midst of his thoughts, Izuku failed to notice someone stepping into his path until he’d smacked straight into them. Jarred back into the present, he jumped back with a startled yelp.

“Ah! I’m sorry!” A voice boomed above him, and Izuku found himself abruptly presented with the back of someone’s head as the person he’d collided with bowed low. “Forgive my clumsiness! I should’ve been paying better attention!”

“N-no, it’s okay, really!” Izuku spluttered. “To be honest, I wasn’t paying attention much either.”

“Well then, looks like we’re both at fault.” He straightened up, and Izuku tilted his head back to look at his face. Recognition kicked in a moment later; the boy before him was not one that you forgot easily.

“Oh! Um. Hello!” Izuku fidgeted where he stood. He couldn’t help it; Yoarashi Inasa had quite the presence. “It’s Yoarashi-kun, isn’t it? From Shiketsu High?”

Yoarashi blinked. Surprise clouded his eyes for a moment before recognition lit up, clear as day. “Ah, yeah! I remember you from the provisional exams last fall! I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced.” He held out his hand.

“Oh, right! I’m Midoriya.” Izuku’s hand was dwarfed in Yoarashi’s when he shook it. “I’m, uh, from UA.”

“I remember. Havin’ a nice summer, I hope.”

“Pretty good.” Izuku pushed his hands into his pockets. “Oh, and, I guess I’m pretty late, but congratulations. On your provisional license. I heard, from Todoroki—” Yoarashi’s face went cold, and Izuku’s voice trailed off. The change to the other boy’s demeanor was immediate and visible—obvious, even. Izuku could have kicked himself for forgetting; Todoroki and Yoarashi hadn’t parted on the best of terms back in the fall; the make-up exams must not have improved things very much.

At least they’d apparently kept it civil enough for them both to pass.

A moment later Yoarashi seemed to compose himself, and smiled again. “Thanks. That’s kind of you to say.”

“Er. No problem.” Eager for a subject change, Izuku latched onto the first idea that came to his head. “So, uh, what brings you here?”

“Shiketsu High is really kicking off with its training,” Yoarashi replied, with an eager smile that showed all his teeth. “Some of my gear’s with Support for repairs, so. Meantime, I need spares.”

“Same here, sort of,” Izuku replied. “UA’s given us three weeks of break, but once we’re back, we’ll probably be hitting the ground running, like always.” His memory took him back to the attempted robbery at the beach, and he couldn’t help smiling wryly. “I’m still finding time to train, though. Well—it finds me, anyway.”

Yoarashi laughed. “I see! It’s pretty refreshing to have a license, even if it’s only a provisional one—no more standing back when a crime happens in front of you, yeah?”

“Well, for the most part. It’s nice to be helpful, and it’s good practice, so.” Izuku shrugged, grinning sheepishly. “Win-win.”

“Indeed! Even the top heroes have to start somewhere.” Yoarashi sobered for a moment. “Though I suppose it’s not as much of a race now as it used to be. What with the focus on collaboration, and all.”

“Yeah… I’m kind of glad,” Izuku admitted. “Honestly? I’m happier helping my friends get stronger with me, than trying to compete with them.” He thought of Monoma in B-class, and couldn’t help wincing. “Though, some people have a problem getting out of that mindset.”

“Hmph. I can only imagine how much trouble someone like Endeavor must have with it.” A look of distaste crossed Yoarashi’s face, and Izuku found himself matching it.

“Yeah, well…” Izuku let his hands curl into fists in his pockets. “He’s just gonna have to deal with it. And if he can’t… well, he’s not gonna be number one forever.”

“Hah.” It sounded a bit similar to a laugh, but it wasn’t one. “Hopefully his son learns better.”

Izuku felt a prickle up his spine at Yoarashi’s tone. “What do you mean by that?” he asked, fighting to keep his tone steady.

“You’re his classmate, aren’t you?” Yoarashi replied. “The similarities are pretty obvious—surely you’ve noticed.”

Hidden in his pockets, Izuku’s fists tightened until his nails dug into his palms. “Not particularly.”

“It’s in his eyes, y’see,” Yoarashi went on. “They’re a lot like Endeavor’s. Just as cold. I don’t think heroes should have eyes like that, y’know?”

Izuku thought of the way Todoroki’s eyes had lit up over a year ago, standing across from him at the Sports Festival as he let his fire loose for the first time. He thought of his half-almost-smiles that sometimes, very rarely, turned into real smiles. He thought of Todoroki watching movies late into the night, eyes wide and glued to the screen or crinkling with amusement at some casual crack that Izuku or Tsuyu made. He thought of Todoroki laughing.

“I think he just doesn’t know you very well,” he said at length. “And you don’t really know him either.”

“I’ve gotten a pretty good idea from what I’ve seen of him,” Yoarashi said with a shrug. “He’s pretty wrapped up in himself, y’know? Doesn’t pay much attention to people beyond him. Acts like everybody else is in his way. Pretty bad quality for somebody who says he wants to be a hero—”

“Yoarashi.” His own voice felt harsh and rough in his throat, but Izuku was too cold and numb to care about how he must sound to Yoarashi. The prickling along his spine had stopped, replaced by a chill that seemed to pervade every nerve in his body. Yoarashi looked at him, and blinked when Izuku met his eyes. He spoke, voice quiet and trembling. “If you keep talking about my friend like that, then we’re going to have a problem.”

Yoarashi blinked again, eyes widening slightly. “O-oh.” He cleared his throat noisily. “’M sorry, I didn’t realize—uh. That was out of line.”

“Just a little.” Izuku shut his eyes briefly, struggling to leash his temper.

“Sorry,” Yoarashi repeated. To his credit, he did sound contrite. “Didn’t know you two were friends.”

Izuku let out a noisy sigh, and with it went the rest of his temper. “It’s fine if you don’t like him,” he said. “Can’t force everyone to get along, I know. And it’s definitely fine if you don’t like his dad because I don’t like him either. Todoroki doesn’t like him either, did you know that?”

“It—it’s not just that.” Yoarashi frowned—not an angry frown, but a thoughtful one. “Have you met Endeavor?”

By some miracle, Izuku kept his face steady. “Once or twice.”

“And you don’t see the similarities?”

“It just doesn’t matter to me,” Izuku said shortly. “Just because he’s similar doesn’t mean he wants to be.” He paused, grinding his teeth until his jaw ached. “Look—what do you even have against Endeavor? Not that I’m saying you’re wrong, just… what’d he do to you, to make you hate him so much?”

“He—” Yoarashi averted his eyes, frowning. “You’ll think I’m petty.”

“No, I think Endeavor’s petty,” Izuku said flatly. “Look, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, just—”

“It was a small thing,” Yoarashi went on. “Now that I think of it. It was such a small thing, but it meant a lot. I looked up to him, you know. For years, I thought he was—well.” He grimaced. “Then one day, when I was pretty young, I had the chance to meet him. Just wanted an autograph, y’know? Too starstruck to string half a sentence together.” He paused. “He brushed past me hard enough to knock me over, told me to stay out of his way.” He forced out a humorless bark of laughter. “Kind of a slap in the face.”

It was a drop in the bucket of his dislike for Endeavor, but Izuku could still feel the level rise, if only a little. “I know the feeling,” he said. “Believe me, I know. I was like that too, sort of.” He shook his head. “I mean, All-Might’s always been my favorite—” Yoarashi’s wry smile softened to something more genuine. “But I used to think Endeavor was cool, too. Finding out he wasn’t what I thought he was…” Todoroki’s face like stone, one hand clutching at his scar. “In my memories, my mother is always crying.” He shook himself. “Well, it wasn’t fun. But… still, that was what? Two minutes of interaction with him?” Izuku shrugged. “Hardly more for me.”

Yoarashi’s eyebrows came together, his brow furrowing deeply. “What does that have to do with it?”

“If Endeavor can hurt you that much in two minutes,” Izuku said. “Then imagine what it must be like living with him.”

If Yoarashi did have an answer for that, he didn’t offer it. Izuku kept his eyes on the other boy, willing him to understand.

“Honestly? I don’t think I’d need to have met him to dislike him.” His jaw tightened. “Because Todoroki’s my friend. He’s saved my life more than once, and I don’t like anyone who hurts my friends.” He looked away, shrugging again. “Honestly I’m surprised you two aren’t friends already. If you hate Endeavor that much, then you already have something in common.”

He heard a short huff of breath from Yoarashi.

“Like I said,” Izuku went on, before Yoarashi could answer him. “You don’t have to like him. But if you’re going to dislike him, then dislike him. Dislike him because you don’t agree with him, or because your personalities just clash. Don’t hate him just because you think he’s Endeavor Part Two.” The other boy towered over him, but Izuku glared up at him anyway. “That’s not who he is, and you have no idea how hard he tries to make sure it’s not what he becomes.”

Yoarashi’s eyes were wide with surprise. “I… I see.” He paused, jaw working slightly as if he was physically chewing it over. “I apologize, if—if I offended you. I didn’t know you felt so strongly about this.”

“I do. Of course I do.” Seeing Yoarashi back down, Izuku found himself off-balance and embarrassed. With an awkward cough, he let his squared shoulders slump again and forced his tense spine to loosen. “It’s just—it’s not about me.” But it was, sort of. Because for all that Todoroki had ever been through, for all his past suffering, it barely ever showed on his face. He bore it all stoically, especially now more than he had before. Izuku remembered yelling at Todoroki and Yoarashi for getting sidetracked by their argument, and here he was squaring up with his hackles up like a dog, after nothing but a few careless comments. What was wrong with him?

Feelings like this, at least from what Izuku had heard, were supposed to be butterflies and stammering. All Izuku found himself with was more worries and a shorter temper.

“He’s my friend,” he said at last. It felt like a lame excuse.

“Hnh.” Yoarashi paused. The corner of his mouth twitched. “Guess that makes him lucky, then. To have a friend like you.”

Izuku shrugged. “Luck doesn’t have anything to do with it,” he replied. “We’re friends because we’ve been through a lot together.”

The half-smile deepened. “Huh. You’re kinda prickly about him, aren’t you?”

Thankfully, Izuku’s mind went blank at that, so he simply stared at Yoarashi instead of spluttering or saying something embarrassing.

“Well, anyway.” Yoarashi stepped past him. “I won’t keep you any longer. Good talking to you, Midoriya.”

“Uh, thanks,” was all that Izuku could think to say. Face blank, he watched Yoarashi walk away and wrestled with the off-balance feeling he was left with after the whole encounter. It felt a little like he had overextended himself, and now the other boy was leaving him stretched too far forward with no way to catch himself.

Shaking his head to clear it, Izuku paced through the store for another fifteen minutes before employees started recognizing him and giving him funny looks. His temper had finally calmed, and he made his way back outside for a breath of fresh air.

If he had been slightly less distracted, he might have noted that his exit did not go unnoticed. But Izuku, at the moment, was very distracted, too caught up in his own thoughts to notice that he was briefly followed on the way out.

Out in the parking lot, he kept his feet moving as he tried to untangle his own mind. Vaguely he remembered talking to Kirishima, just a few days before. He’d snapped then, too, at the implication that he’d had ulterior motives for inviting Todoroki into his home. Kirishima had called it getting “bent out of shape,” and that felt like an apt description.

I want to protect him, he thought. It wasn’t much of a surprise, or even a realization. Protecting Todoroki had been on his list of priorities since the day they’d become friends. It seemed absurd when he really thought about it. Todoroki was one of the strongest people he knew; he was sharp, he was fast, he had a powerful quirk that he’d been making full use of for over a year, and he was probably better-trained than anyone else in their class—though that thought made his stomach turn.

Izuku realized he was pacing across the parking lot and stopped when he reached the street outside of the shopping center. The inside of his head felt like a hopeless mess.

He had thought of Todoroki when running into a villain-infested forest with two broken, useless arms. At the provisional exams, he’d almost kicked Gang Orca in the head, and then spent the rest of the day worrying about Todoroki’s failure. He’d dragged Aizawa into helping him chase off Endeavor. He’d almost lost his damn mind when Todoroki was in the hospital, and he’d challenged Endeavor like an idiot then turned around and eaten crow to fix the mess that it could have made.

Izuku pressed his palms into his forehead and quietly groaned. Really, how had it taken him this long to understand his own feelings? In hindsight it was painfully obvious. Even Yoarashi seemed to be picking up on it.

Resigned, he checked his phone. No messages from Todoroki yet, but he may as well start making his way back. Mom had insisted they stick together while they were out, and she would be worried sick if she knew they were separated for this long. He could always wait in the lobby.

Mind made up, Izuku walked another block further. He was less than halfway there, just crossing a side street, when he froze in his tracks and barely—just barely—turned his head.

Repeat villain attacks had made him more alert, or one might say jumpier. His senses were sharpened by bitter experience, and Izuku wasn’t sure he knew how to turn them off anymore. And so, when he stepped across the side street, he heard the muffled cry of alarm perfectly well.

Izuku turned and stepped into the side street before his mind had caught up to his instincts. Once it did, he forced himself to stop where he was before rushing in. He had no backup, no plan, and no idea what he might be dealing with. No one knew where he was going.

He had no intention of ignoring a call for help, but he would help no one by being stupid about it. Better text Todoroki, at least.

His phone was out, his thumb poised over the screen, when the cry reached him again, louder this time.

“Midoriya—” It cut off as if choked. All thoughts of caution vanished, and Izuku launched himself into the side street at breakneck speed. It was quiet—silent, even, far enough from the shopping center that any semblance of crowds wouldn’t quite reach. The street stretched before him emptily, but Izuku turned his head this way and that as he ran, scanning for intersecting streets or alleyways.

“Todoroki?” he called. His voice was thin, his heartbeat high in his throat. His phone was still in his hand. He could call—

“Midori—” This time, the cry was cut short before Todoroki could even finish his name.

Izuku’s eyes fell upon an alley up ahead. With a burst of quirk-fueled speed, he reached the entrance and skidded to a halt ready for a fight. “I’m here! What’s wrong—”

The words died.

Before him, the alley extended a short distance before ending with a high concrete wall that blocked the rest of the way. In one corner, right where the wall met the side of one of the buildings that enclosed the alley, Todoroki slumped over, huddled and still. On the wall behind him, a dark red smear showed where he’d struck the wall and slid down.

The sight hit him like a knife to the heart.

A harsh cry of horror wrenched its way from Izuku’s throat, and he hurled himself forward. He made it two steps before sense got in the way of howling panic, and he stumbled to a halt to look around, listen, and take stock of where he was. His ears roared, but the alley was silent. As best he could tell there was no one around.

The walls around him went hazy, and the buzz of One For All had left him. Tears blurred his vision, and he all but staggered forward and dropped to his knees in front of his friend. The tears spilled over, clearing his eyes so that he could see the blood soaking through Todoroki’s shirt and pooling on the ground beneath him. “No,” he rasped. “No, no, no, no—” His friend’s face was dead-pale and streaked with red, and there was no rise and fall to his chest.

It was hard to see when the tears would not stop.

“Todoroki,” Izuku sobbed, and reached out desperately to feel for a pulse.

His hand was maybe halfway there when sense made itself known again. Heart-stopping terror and panic almost drowned it out, but still it persisted, drilling through to the back of Izuku’s mind.

No ice, no burn marks. If Todoroki had time to call for help, he would have had time to fight back.

He was halfway through the thought when the world turned sideways, and the body before him moved. Or it didn’t move; Izuku’s eyes didn’t catch what happened. One moment he was kneeling in blood and horror, and the next he was spun around and slammed hard enough against the wall that the back of his head hit concrete and his vision went dark. When it cleared, he found himself looking into a face that looked like Todoroki’s but was not him. All the parts that made the whole were there—mismatched eyes and scar and red-and-white hair—but Izuku knew more than he’d ever known anything before that this was not Todoroki.

No ice, no burn marks.

No signs of a fight.

Too much blood pooling on the ground.

News reports said ‘shapeshifter’.

In the end, it was the smile that gave it away. Todoroki’s smiles were rare and precious, and this face smiled the way a child did when holding a magnifying glass over an anthill.

“So, you’re a crier,” they said in a voice that sounded like Todoroki’s but was not. The hand pinning Izuku to the wall was hard and strong enough to bruise. “That’s nice. Criers are more fun.” The scarred face stretched wider in a grin, blood trickling between the teeth. “So, kiddo, tell me something. What else scares you?”