#i wonder if this is how kiriona felt waking up with a hole in her chest

[tooturtly]

Thinking about how Kiriona’s chest with teeth is an inversion of Jesus’ sacred heart imagery. Like, a barbed, luminous heart, that represents (un)dying love for the world? Come on.

Kiriona gave her sacred heart to Harrow, to her world. She died for her, so that she could ascend. But instead of warm and glowing heart imagery, she gets a hole with teeth. Not just thorns pointing inward, but teeth, a warning.

I think it also shows how Jod sees her act of sacrifice in relation to himself (an entire post by itself, but I digress). He might have kept her body as is, but no, along with giving Kiriona impenetrable skin, to make her a better weapon for him, he gave her a heart that will hurt anyone who tries to reach for it, even herself.

[tooturtly]

Taking a class where I’m handling real bones, and often times I just have to stop and stare at them. Because that was an animal, it lived, it ate, it thought, it had fur and eyes.

I always try to imagine what it looked like. How would it have felt to suddenly wake up on my table? Shivering and alive and whole for the first time in a while. No longer suffering from the injuries it took in life. Maybe still having that trauma written on their bones.

That animal wouldn’t love me. It would run and hide. Maybe still feel my hands on each crevice of its vertebrae. I wonder if that would scare them. I wonder what they would think of me, knowing every inch of them from every angle. I think that has to be a kind of love. And I wonder if this is how John felt, with the power to make this imagining a reality.