#i wish there was a good ship name for this fic that Wasn't Already A Real Thing (aka k*ngcake)

[evieelyzabethh]

I Want You

pairing(s): willow x tara

summary: willow finally gets to visit tara's grave after being in England for the past few months

warnings: angst with a slight happy ending, mentions of tara's death, blood, and suicidal tendencies/thoughts, derealization, willows dark era is a metaphor for substance abuse so that may be triggering for some folks, its just really sad

an: i don't usually do ship fics, i just so happened to be in a mood. its also pride month and there is like 0 tillow content on this app *i still wouldn't recommend requesting ship fics tho*

Back in England, there was a tree. A willow tree. Unlike Xander, who was very quick to let everyone know never to call him anything other than Xander, she never had an issue with her name. It fit her. She was spindly and growing up she had knobby knees that caused her to move a bit awkwardly. Her hair blew around her face, and, just like the rest of her body, looked like if the wind were to pick up, she would be blown away. A dandelion seed in the wind that would maybe make someone's day brighter at the hope of a wish, instead of a willow tree that may actually prove useful.

She wanted to believe that she was like a willow tree, that she was stronger than she looked. That she had dug her clumsy feet into the ground and planted her roots and she would stay, unmovable and tall, until some monumental hurricane or imposing tornado came through and uprooted her. Even in that case, her seeds would be sewn into all the land she touched, and she would live forever, replanted and replenished by those who knew her, and fed her, and grew with her, and loved her. She wanted to believe that she could plant roots, that she had control over where she stayed and who she was with and if she liked her situation enough, she wouldn't to leave. Permanence. Consistency. Control. That's what she wanted.

As a kid, she wrote her name in lowercase letters; it wasn't til high school her willows became Willow. In that ranch farm in middle of fucking nowhere England, she became willow once again. She thought she was sent there to be put down. Like a rabid dog that was too pitiful to die on its own but too dangerous for its survival to be left to chance.

It was such an odd feeling; that derealization. Stepping back and watching people talk to you, touch you, extend their sympathies. Hearing yourself talk and sounding like how adults do in Charlie Brown. Feeling your mouth flap but not choosing what comes out. Just knowing that you had a body, and that you had a mind, but you knew it because someone told you that you did. That's how it felt when she thought she was going to die. Her soul had already began to check out and distance itself from the body that was going to run cold within the next couple days. She didn't even try and protest, she was that eager to let go. Even worse than simply killing a man, she didn't do it for Tara. Killing Warren didn't feel like catharsis, it felt like pleasure.

Nothing was relieved. She didn't feel lighter. She didn't feel better. An anvil sat on her chest, squeezing every ounce of life from her until she was acting on instinct and impulse. Killing Warren was a dopamine shot straight to her brain, it didn't remove the anvil or ease the ache, and she didn't do it for that purpose. She did it to do it. She went on auto pilot after the fact, watching her life pass by her and watch her kill her friends while wanting to stop but she couldn't. It felt too good in the moment. It felt like fire. She was on fire.

It was all consuming, the smoke she left behind accumulating and growing with everything she did until she didn't know where she ended or when the smoke began. It hurt what she was doing, being a woman on fire you felt the flames but were also spurred on by hysteria. She had been so cold before, and the fire was a bit much, but that's where the pleasure was derived. The cold depravity was killing her, at least in the flames she would go out in a blaze. Yet, dying then and dying in that ranch felt so different.

She felt like she deserved it both times. Willow knew that she had been losing control of her magics. Floating on ceilings and hallucinating, seeking out someone on Amy's recommendation for fucks sake, these weren't things she would normally do. She had lost control of herself a while ago, but when she went dark, it was the first time she lost sight of the reins. She deserved to die during her rampage because she was going to gut the world, turn it inside out until the oceans tipped into the sea and every piece of earth was reduced to ash, and she couldn't stop herself. Her death would've been damage control.

The second time she felt it would've been redemption. That she had gone too far and there was no saving her. Her punishment came in her separation alone.

She wasn't there when Tara was buried.

She was told when they thought it was safe enough that she was buried on a hill. They told her the gravestone was decorated in reeds, flowers, and crystals and they cleaned the white marble stone every time they came to visit her. That they took care of it, and they told her this, but they meant to say they took care of it for her. It felt heavy weighing in on the back of their tongues, that they couldn't care for her like Willow could but since she was away, maybe even dead, they would have to be enough. They were all Tara had.

She didn't know how to dress. Buffy told her to go as she is, that if anything is the same from when she was dead that she can't see her anyways. She wanted to ask if Buffy could tell who was visiting her and if she was ever disappointed, but the words got stuck in her throat.

So, she stood there, small and awkward by her girlfriends grave. She walked up slowly, like something was waiting to attack her when she made it to the peak. She expected more fanfare, more people, birds, noise, something. She had never felt so alone. She stood by that white headstone and felt the breath exit her lungs. She was back in that room again. Holding her dead body, cradling her head, the grass feeling like her soft hair in her hands. There was no ground as she fell to her knees, one of her hands covering her mouth and the other ghosting the headstone. Did she even have the right to touch her grave. It was her fault.

She had gotten overzealous bringing Buffy back and this was her retribution. While the universe demands balance, above all else it is petty and Willow knew it. She knew it didn't seek reparations, because there is nothing you can give the universe that it can just take. It demands pain. It doesn't concern itself with human emotion, it doesn't know, or need to know, sympathy or empathy. It seeks to cause pain because in a world when there is nothing you can gain, why not just take. It needed everyone to know how powerless they are, that no matter what you think you have, it's not yours. The universe was the all mother, she put you here and she will take you out. She'll take your little toys, she'll stop you from seeing your friends, she gave everything for you meaning she has every right to take it back.

But it was supposed to be okay.

Buffy had saved the universe more times than anyone could count, why does the billions of lives she saved not balance out her one life. Her one significant life. And even if the universe couldn't recognize her importance, wasn't it enough that she quit. She was clean. She did what she was supposed to, so why wasn't it okay. It was supposed to be okay, and it's her fault it isn't.

A part of her wanted to rip through the ground and prove that she was really under there. A part of her couldn't believe that she was really gone. Her spirit still lived that house for her.

Buffy was right, maybe she did need this, for closure at the very least. Maybe the room will warm up after this, maybe she'll stop seeing her in mirrors, maybe her blood will leave her hands and clothes. Her death felt so real, the blood ran thick and slick and it stained everything she touched. Her sheets had bloody handprints, her pillows smelled like copper, her skin and her nails were caked in oxidized blood and she wanted to pull it off herself. If she could trade places with Warren, slip out of her skin and set it on fire to begin again she would. Maybe then she'd feel lighter. But that's not what Tara would want.

Tara would want her to power through. She would want her to keep getting better. She would take her in her arms and brush her hair and tell her it was going to be okay. That she was going to be okay. She would tell her she deserved to be happy, and if letting her go was how she did it, then that's what needed to be done. That maybe she should let go. She would kiss her forehead and tell her she was too strong to give up. But Tara made her strong and she had never gone through anything like this and there was never going to be another Tara.

It hurt. Her head, her soul, her body it all ached and Tara's death ate away at her until she was nothing just like she was before. Lower than she was before. She was pathetic but at least her hands were clean. Now she was dirty and she should've been left to rot in the dirt.

In the ranch, she had thought she was going to be buried under than tree. Her willow tree. She had grown a patch of flowers underneath the trunk because she didn't think they would deem her worthy enough to do anything but to shovel the dirt over her corpse. It was her one selfish deed, to leave her resting sight something other than overturned dirt and dead grass. She had letters addressed to her friends in the hope that Giles would deliver them. She wonders if he ever found them. She still had them, hidden in place so that no one would find them. If Dawnie saw them, she wouldn't know what to do.

"I don't know what to say to you." She pushed out through tears. She had a lot to say to everyone else, but so much to say to Tara that her mind went blank. Tara got a letter, maybe if she had the courage, she would come back and read it to her. "I miss you. I miss you so much it hurts."

Wherever Tara was, she listened.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, and I know you're tired of me saying it, but it's true."

She was tired of hearing it. I forgive you. You were grieving. It is okay.

"I did - I did a lot of bad things, baby. It didn't make it easier and the pain it-it doesn't go away. It doesn't stop." I know, love. Life is hard. I forgive you.

But Willow couldn't hear. She hadn't heard her the whole time. She had said sorry in so many ways so many times and she was so tired. Tara wanted to tell her it was okay, that she couldn't grieve her forever and she needed to move on. Tara couldn't make it better now. Tara could barely make it better then. Willow needed to get better. She needed time. She needed grace. She was too hurt to see that everyone was giving it to her, but she wasn't accepting of it.

"I'm trying to be strong, I really am. A-And I haven't done any magics like I promised. It's been hard but-but it's been good for me. I don't know if I can do this, but I'm gonna try for you."

I'm so proud of you. You're doing so well. Try for you, not me.

"A-And everyone is doing well. They miss you, too. They probably tell you every time they visit." She sniffled a bit while wiping her tears.

They tell me all the time. They missed you too. I miss you too.

They sat in silence for a while, both leaning on the grave for different sides of life and death. Willow wept. Cried so hard her tears probably watered the flowers growing on her grave. They sat together and the quiet said more than enough, they conversed beyond words just as they were together beyond the grave.

"I love you."

I love you too. She screamed it, but she couldn't hear her. I love you still. Despite it all, I love you.

She leaned onto the grave. Tara knows because she felt it. Like the feeling of laying on warm sheets on cleaning day and finally get to rest. Like waking up to misshapen pancakes and apple juice. Like watching her take care of Dawnie and promise her that they would live together in a nice cottage in the countryside. Just the three of them. Happy. Content. At peace.

[neon-pink-leitner]

Ask Game: A, B, E, K, L, N, O, P, R, V, Z.

Anon, send me "Z" in its own ask. I got a plan for that one and I've already written enough here. This needs its own post.

A -��Ships that you currently like a lot.

V/Johnny is probably one of my main ships right now. Same with Johnny/Kerry but one that I love and don't talk about much is Cletus Kasady/Carnage Symbiote.

B - A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

V and Takamura, at first, I just did not get it at all and while its not a main ship for me, I see why ya'll ship them.

E - Have you added anything cracky/hilarious to your fandom? If so, what?

Oh god. Okay so ummm...I wrote a crack fic that ships Thanos from the MCU with Knull the God of Symbiotes. Its fucking great, its terrible, I want to burn it, I should frame it, you can read it here

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

I got two here. First being Johnny Silverhand. We get glimpses of his past self being a total fucking asshole and we know from others that he wasn't always a good person but we get to watch this slow change with V's help as he grows into a person that you could sit in the same room with. At the end even willing to give his life for V's which I feel like is something that past Johnny would not have done at all. My second one would be Eddie Brock. He went from being one of Mavel's top villains with a grudge to kill Spider-Man to somewhat healing his wounds and ends up, no joke, not kidding, being a fucking God who wants to save the world from Knull. Its really stunning to see.

L- Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your fave

I'm very middle of the road with River Ward. His personality is a little, I don't know, I can't really find the word. But his quest? One of the most interesting in gaming and I said it once and I'll say it again, DO NOT run his quest at the farm if you are not sober, you won't have a good time. Also Mickey Jones from Doctor Who didn't deserve to be led on so much by Rose. He might have been a bit annoying, but The Doctor and Rose didn't treat him like they should have

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice)

Really the only thing I wish that was a different is I feel like fic writers don't get the credit we deserve. I understand why visual art gets the attention it does and it should! Drawing of any type if hard as fuck! I don't see this as much in the Cyberpunk fandom because everyone is really happy to get any type of content but I saw this in the Marvel fandom where most often drawings would get praised way more than fics. Honestly on that topic, the Cyberpunk fandom is one of the chilliest fandoms I've ever been in. If I had to pick a second one I'd say I wish people would post more about their OCs!(I say this while pointing at a mirror) I love love seeing ya'lls lil guys! I always wanna see more!(Again, still pointing at the mirror)

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

Oof, okay, here we go, loading up my liked songs on Spotify and hitting random. Here were go

Sparks Fly • Taylor Swift (spotify.com)

Had to think of this one but I feel Kerry and V would fit this. I've read alot of MaleV/Kerry stuff where they are both hopeless romantic mushy types and this just feels like something they would dance to in the living room when it was just them. Judy/V also popped into my head but I'm not sure why.

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom

AU in which Johnny is a devil hunter in Devil May Cry. He's got the vibe for it, the gun, and the guitar. In fact he's modded his guitar in such a way that he can use it as a weapon (think Nevan from Devil May Cry). I could see Samurai being both a rock band and a band of devil hunters as well. Not sure where V could fit in. Maybe they got, I dunno, bit by a demon and know they got fucked up powers?

R - Which friendship/platonic relationship is your favorite in fandom?

We really don't get to see enough of V and Misty and that's a damn shame. I would have loved maybe a little side quest thing with the two of them, more so than just Jackie's funeral. I also love Jackie's and V's friendship. I know some people ship them but I just see them as friends. Its really driven home that you can't trust anyone in Night City and here's Jackie willing to take V under his wing after they lost everything. A real choom, good guy, truly.

V - Which character do you relate to most?

In Cyberpunk 2077? Despite her not being one of faves, Judy. Much like her I also a friend to suicide. It was that quest that prevented me from playing the game for two years because I didn't know how I would handle it. Only to find that when I played, and V comforts Judy, It felt like comforting myself. I understood her feelings of loss and guilt. Its a type of feeling you only get when someone close to you takes their own life and its hard to put into words. Recently my grandparents sold my childhood home, my forest and my safeplace. Seeing Judy explore the flooded remains of her childhood home made me cry after this. I understand now. The longing for a place you'll never go back to and even if you do, it won't be the same. The feeling of watching memories play out before your eyes. Its not something you really get over and it changes you.

[bread-squid-uwu]

Hi so I’m the name anon and I just wanted to say that. Yeah of course that doesn’t apply to the Racism that is KC and Nekoette, but also. I wasn’t sending that confession as a writer. As a writer, yeah I understand changing names. Aphmau is weird and Minecraft roleplays are cringe change things to be socially acceptable and Garroth shouldn’t be running around with his real name etc etc. I see all those things and reasons, but I sent the confession as a reader.

And as a reader I find harsh name changes disorienting and that they can make a fic difficult to read, especially with something like MCD where these characters can have little to nothing that makes them truky distinct beyond hair/eye color, a major detail, and their name. And you can really see that in the vastly different ways people view a character. All that paired with one of the things that makes fics pretty cool, not needing to build things up and explain who the characters are or what they look like, lends itself pretty badly to a name change because it leads to me trying to figure out who this character actually is instead of really reading the fic

But at the end of the day, it’s just my opinion and I knew it wouldn’t be wholly agreed with, and that’s why I sent it to a confessions blog

Abd also, I do personalize my experience, however in a fandom this small personalizing your experience comes at the steep cost of even being able to have an experience at all. And I don’t ship Garrance so I’m pretty dead in the water fic wise already lmao, so I do my best to keep my options open and the fact that is a real dealbreaker really does just show how disorienting I think it is.

Anyway, I sent this to you because I feel like you missed my point and I hate my point being missed. I wasn’t a writer saying “Under no circumstances should names ever be changed there is no reason” I was a reader saying, no matter the bountiful valid reasons that can be as small as I wanted to, I find name changes in fics extremely disorienting and hard to read

Oh anon no no I completely understood you lmao, I was just chiming in with a viewpoint from someone who did change a few characters names - not responding negatively or bashing on the confession or opinion.

I do completely understand, and even agree with you entirely. Which is why I keep my own name swaps similar to canon, for example Nekoette became Niko, and of course our main girl Aphmau became Aphrodite - still "Aph"

I get it, and I've actually put down a few fics for confusing changes and non direct descriptions of things, because I have some processing issues and get lost. It is disorienting, which is why curating experiences with what you enjoy is important not only for us as readers, but also so writers don't feel upset or pressured to change their craft based on said feedback.

Not saying that's an outcome of your confession ask, but it's a fair point to keep in mind eh? You brought up an opinion and now in this ask you bring up amazing points and very very true statements!! Like?? Honestly anon I actually think you're super cool and wish you the best with finding aphblr content that suits what you're interested in 🩵

Truly I wasn't saying anything in response to how you feel about it anon. My intent was only to explain my own changes for my own readers, the few of them lol, - and also to, again, bring up the absolute weirdness that Jess created with KC and her daughter because really i'll never be over "kawaii~chan" being called for CLASS ATTENDANCE IN PDH BRO.. like it's her full and LEGAL NAME that destroys me lmfao

This fandom is tiny, and it is hard to find specific things around here, but hey! If you can't find what you like, there's always the option to create things for pure self indulgence right? Nothing works better than creating for yourself, its why I have this blog actually!! Lack of danvis content made me start creating some out of playful spite :D

Idk if my response to this is good, I'm running on no sleep and limited brain power lmao, this reply got rambled into and definitely incoherent but meh 🩵

[localplaguenurse]

Hewwo my dear author ! :3

First off, I hope you don't find my 3AM rambling annoying because after finishing "As Gold as the Ginkgo Trees" and "it's all that i can give to you, my dear", I almost cried my eyes out over your beautifully-written fics and I'm truly exciting to share you about my OCs (not me purposely created to ship with those handsome men UwU).

Starting with their profiles, the lady standing next to Pants Man is his wife - whose maiden name was Camicia Draconia-Shroud (yea, fiery blue hair gamerboy and tall handsome dragonman in DTW, I love Multiverse AU). Camicia was NOT Idia and Malleus' lovechild, she was, in fact, a great-great-great-granddaughter of Idia through her mother's bloodline and a great-niece of Malleus through her father's (explained her elf-like ears though).

Camicia was born as a princess of Briar Valley. Her father was a nephew of Malleus and became king after dragonman's resignation, her mother was a Shroud family member, Camicia had two elder brothers. She was raised separately from her family, by her nannies, in the royal domain of The Abbey. Her father was quite an unreliable king so her mother, who was sharp-minded and ruthless enough, took the charge. The Queen was more fond of her eldest son, the Crown Prince, than her other children so she poured her mind into educating him to make him a carbon copy of her.

A smallpox epidemic broke out in Briar Valley almost took the Queen's and the princes' life. The Queen made a decision to send her two younger children to be raised by her other family members. The second prince - who received the most severe damage from smallpox - was sent to The Queen's aunt while princess Camicia was sent to the Queen's cousin - the Duke and Duchess of Vazque.

The ducal couple had already had nine children, they adopted Camicia as their fourth child. However, the Shroud was in war by that time and they was in need of financial support, so arranged marriage was a great choice. But ! One problem was... they had no unmarried lady who had reached adulthood. Things came and went until the Duchess took matter into her own hands and wrote a proposal letter to Pantalone, offering her adoptive daughter's hand-in-marriage. And Pantalone accepted (because he wanted to own her fae-descended bloodline) ! Woohoo !

The next problem was... well... Camicia was only 15 so there were lots of hardships to finally get them married including Pantalone was lied about his bride's age (don't worry, he was aware of her real age and they didn't do anything unappreciated). Nevertheless, in their early married years, Camicia faced many difficulties such as not gaining her husband's trust, being too young to be a proper wife,... and she had to solve problems on her own... (but we don't dig too deep about it here).

Meanwhile, the lonely headshot sketch next to the couple depicting Despoinate - Morax/Zhongli's morganatic wife. She was unofficially a Shroud (Camicia's adoptive father, the Duke of Vazque, was Despoinate's uncle) but forbidden to bear the family's name since she was an illegitimate child born to a nobleman and a married woman. Nothing much was known about Despoinate except for she wasn't named until her teenage years (before that time she was only called "that girl", "the kid",...), she was abandoned to the church by her mother and was raised by nuns until a fire destroyed the church and killed almost all people. She next spent years in a workhouse, witnessing horrible scenes to the point she chose to sleep in a stable instead of inside the workhouse.

The reason why Despoinate reached Teyvat was that her father - after acknowledging and raising her for a couple of years - also abandoned her with some money and let her live on her own.

(Fun fact: the Shroud family didn't know about Despoinate's existance so both her and Camicia didn't know about each other).

Lastly, thanks for reading my rambling, dear author, I wish you good health !

Not gonna lie, did not expect the plot twist of child bride.

That said, your art is really cute! I also appreciate your support in my writing, though I do worry that you might be a little young to be reading some of my fics, namely the pants fic. I generally consider the Morax fic mostly pg-13 save for a couple chapters you can skip, but the pants fic is definitely 18+. If I have assumed wrong, my apologies! Otherwise, skip those ones.

Once again, cute art, and stay safe!

[valandhirwriter]

@do-androids-dream-ao3acc - How can I not be greedy when you write so well? I would have offered the same for you, but I too will answer all of your questions.

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction?

That's a bit of a weird story. In the late 90ies I had just re-read Dumas Musketier Saga (The three Musketiers / Twenty Years After / The Vicomte de Bragelonne) and right at the end of the last book was a moment that annoyed me. It was the accusation against Louise, that her failing to love Raoul had caused his death. I honestly disliked that assertion, the boy had gotten himself killed in my opinion. And I wanted someone in that scene, to actually say it, but all canon characters possible for it were already dead. And then my mind jumped back to the first book, to d'Artagnans ill-fated little affair amoureuse with Mylady de Winter. And suddenly a firework ignited in my brain, connecting the idea of a son of that affair, to a story, that would end up with him being there, and speaking up. It was my first full flung fanfic (about 100k) and it was bad. I recently found it again and it wasn't any good. Though I got some praise for it, weirdly. And that whole thing started me, continuing to a few BG2 stories, Star Wars Snippets, and other smaller stuff until a number of years later the big stories came along.

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

@regis-favorite-raven because I will need an alibi and she's close enough to give one, you, because I will need some fun and gruesome idea of how to get rid of the body.

🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both?

I don't really do reader inserts, it's one thing I have tried and cannot really do.

I love OCs though, because they allow us to cast light into corners of the fictional world, we do not get to see with the canon MCs. I also believe that taking some minor minor canon char and writing him much bigger is often a good way to have an OC that people do not recognize as an OC, because at least the name was invented by the Author.

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I am convinced that Emhyr is quietly jelaous, knowing that Eskel and Geralt were lovers in the past. This head canon can easily apply to Emralt and to Emhyr/Eskel. In both scenarious there would be that significant other from the past and Emhyr's drive to prove that he is the much superior choice.

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

I still think Ciri was a coward, leaving her people to Nilfgaard's tender mercies, instead of at least trying to use her position, and Nilfgaard's wish to legitimize the conquest, to negotiate for either vassal status, or for becoming a province under her leadership. She could have spared her people a lot of suffering. The fact that she doesn't even care or make the effort, is highly selfish and cowardly to me.

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

The different type of Hammermills (Hammerwerk), for refining and creating sheet metal. Along with other details of old mining techniques, that I needed to describe dwarven settlements.

Second would be researching the odd ends and details what Tolkien had said about the nature of the Silmaril.

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

I have a mile of AUs in my head that I would love to read. But one that I always wanted, was a good Aragorn/Boromir romantic story running parallel to LotR events, and NOT going for the Boromir dies/vanishes in Amon Hen, but actually has him continue as a character on, through the rest of the Ring War. Bonus Points for their romance not being doomed from the start. Good character exploration between them would give more bonus points. (A certain amount of Boromir whump would also be okay). Authors - those I'd love it from left writing/fandom a long time ago, so I'd take it from whomever does write well enough.

🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate

I rarely hate characters but I have a strong dislike for some of them. Some I do despise. Let's take one of those.

Cersei Lanister from Game of Thrones: 1. She loves her children truly and would do anything to protect them.

2. She has the guts to preservere in a male dominated society.

3. She is not at least intimidated by Daenerys Targaryen.

For the record: Cersei and Dany sit in the same bucket with me, I dislike them both.

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

Ser Arthur didn’t deign to rush or try to prevent him from running. “I shall believe what you did was your last desperate attempt to save your liege lord,” he observed, speaking in the lilting accent of the South. “The ill deed of a man willing to sacrifice his own honour so that another may live.”

☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username?

Valandhir and Cardhwion both are names coming from stories or games´. Cardhwion was my Bhaalspawn in BG2, and Valandhir was a Numenorán character, erroneously believed in later history of having been the living man who later became the Witch King of Angmar. He's from a story I began writing, which actually played around with the alleged backgrounds of Nazgul and historical errors in the records.

🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it

. Why do I like it? Because looking at it sparks an entire story in my brain.

Quelle: sin-vraal.deviantart.com

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Stories starting with dialogue, or starting without giving me a sense where the story is set, or what the heck is going on. I don't mind having to read to get all the context, but a story where the first scene starts confusing and somehow like a few parts before are missing, make me click away.

Stories that have almost only dialogue will make me hit the return button.

Stories with too short chapters , where I can see the chapter end, while still being at the beginning, have a chance that I won't even start reading.

Genderbenders have a hard time with me. I almost never read them.

I love this truth or dare ask game, but having learned my lesson, I will ask the authors I like directly. :)

Tag whomever you like or are curious about.

I am curious so here are my questions. My "dare" in case you dislike answering will be a story for one of my favourite pairings. ;)

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction? 🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help? 🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both? 🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings 🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character 🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project? ❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best? 🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate 🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here ☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username? 🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it 🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Writing your favorite pairings? Don't get greedy girl, I basically just gave you romantic garden sex! (Also you KNOW I will answer anything because I love that and I love procrastinating) 😂

🍓 ⇢ how did you get into writing fanfiction?

Just like that. I don't remember how I got into it back in the 90s, but in 2020, I got into it because I liked some Emralt stories so much, I thought, "Hey, maybe I can do that, too."

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

Probably @deagle. She'll know what to do because she's seen it in a movie with Sabin Tambrea 😂

🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both?

Weeeeeell. Might be one of my OCs is a tiny bit like myself. But in general, I don't do reader inserts a lot.

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I'm convinced Buck didn't tell Tommy about the sperm donor thingy yet, and it will become a major issue between them for whatever reason.

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

I still think his bachelor party behavior was absolutely out of character for Eddie. I know the fandom theories, but I disagree.

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

Maybe the kind of injuries you get from either falling of a certain height and from being shot with a .45

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

I will fail you... still obsessed with the song, so I'd love to see the topic of the seemingly infallible fail to rescue their loved one. Not necessarily resulting in MCD, though. Don't care which pairing, don't care who'd write it. It's juicy.

🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate

Listen, I don't hate characters. That's stupid, they're not real. I admire writers of any kind if they make me feel things about a character, even if it's repulsion. But wait, we have Gerrard in the coming season. Nobody likes Gerrard... are there 3 good things about him? Let's see. He's old, so he might just die soon. He screams at Buck, that might get him in trouble. He's jealous, so he might make a mistake. I think those are good things 😂

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

Yes, ma'am! Not edited.

“Who killed my father, Pablo? Was that you?”

Carlos pushed himself away from the car’s wreckage and fixed Pablo with his gaze. 

"Me? Oh boy, I don't cross the border so easily these days, you know? And certainly not to get some old guy out of the way. I've got my men for that.“

☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username?

I love Dick. Philip K. Dick, that is 😂

🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it

There are so many, you know I love all the fanart I ever commissioned or got as a present. But today, I'd like to say this piece by @johix (sorry, if you don't want me to put it directly in a post please tell me!) I just love it.

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Usually, two breaks after a paragraph throughout the whole fic. Or when the fic turns out differently than expected, because I often don't read tags and I rarely read things like MPREG and stuff.

THANK YOU! This was fun. I'll throw the same questions right back at you.

[squidbatts]

my love is (not) a weapon

“Fine! I like it, are you happy now, Your Majesty?”

Amethar is. It fills his chest enough that he wants to slam Calroy up against the wall and kiss him senseless, no matter what the Candian elders say about propriety and proper courting behavior.

or: an afternoon with his majesty the king and his intended

((i continue to have Prince Consort Calroy on the brain, so accept this amethar pov fluff piece where they do a little sparring and a little kissing. please enjoy!))

{ao3}

Amethar’s study is the one room of Castle Candy that is entirely his own. The brassy rancher-wood orange of his desk, the paintings of battlefields on the walls, the bookshelf bearing only atlases; it’s all picked out by him, all only for him.

“Oh, this one is a lot of whining about the consequences of something that we told him not to do three seasons ago. Want me to read it to you now or later?”

Him, and Cal. Calroy is perched on the edge of his desk as he goes through Amethar’s mail, slowly swinging one leg back and forth. The letter he has in hand bears the seal of a minor lord that Amethar does vaguely remember advising during a banquet last Highharvest, though Amethar mostly just remembers the way Cal had held onto his arm and whispered relevant bits of gossip to him all evening. Now, Amethar leans back in his desk chair and sighs.

“Is it important?”

“It’s not not important. We’re going to have to fix his mess eventually so we might as well stay up to date on it,” Calroy says. After a moment’s pause he glances at Amethar over the letter and hums, face softening. “But it can wait a while longer. What’s up?”

“I don’t think I can focus on these reports any longer without breaking something,” Amethar replies, and it’s only half a joke. It feels like there’s something beneath his skin, hot and fizzling and inescapable, and if he doesn’t do something that requires more movement than sitting in a chair listening to Calroy talk then he might explode.

“This wouldn’t be a great place to break things in,” Calroy agrees. His smile changes, grows mischievous as he lowers his voice and asks, “Do you wanna spar?”

“‘Do I wanna spar?’ What kind of question is that! Of course I do,” Amethar stands, slinging Payment Day over his shoulder. Amethar is technically not supposed to be sparring, he was told when he was given the crown that it was too much of a risk for him to continue, that he could supervise drills from the side but could no longer participate in them. Still, Amethar’s found that no matter how many times someone tells him to do something, none of them can make him change his behavior. Not anymore.

Calroy hops off the desk and brushes the creases out of his pants, the movement drawing Amethar’s attention to the thick golden ring on Calroy’s thumb. Amethar is grinning before he’s done noticing, before his eyes leave the chevron curve of it or the delicately etched vines. It fits Cal’s style while still standing out next to the cool greens and creams that he favors, a spot of well-suited opulence in his best friend’s humble fashion. Amethar loves it, has loved it since he commissioned the ring from a local jewelry smith, and he loves even more to see it on Calroy.

“You’re wearing it again?” Amethar asks as they fall into step in the hall, gesturing towards Calroy’s hand. Calroy ducks his head away, but not before Amethar sees that he’s smiling as well.

“It was a gift,” Calroy says, voice Court steady despite how he still doesn’t look Amethar in the eye. “Do you think I’d be so rude as to ignore a gift?”

“You would wear a gift so often out of courtesy?”

Calroy huffs but he’s smiling ever so slightly in that way that he only ever lets Amethar see. “Fine! I like it, you picked a good courting gift. Are you happy now, Your Majesty?”

Amethar is. It fills his chest enough that he can barely feel the hollows that grief and anger have carved into his heart, makes him want to slam Calroy up against the wall and kiss him senseless, no matter what the Candian elders say about propriety and proper courting behavior.

He settles for bumping his arm against Calroy’s and grinning like a fool. “Yes, for now.”

If someone had told Amethar ten years ago that he’d be walking the halls of Castle Candy with his intended, his father’s crown atop his head, he would’ve punched them. Even if someone had told Amethar just a few years ago, when he was in the trenches of a war and Calroy had kissed him for the first time, he wouldn’t have believed it; Amethar wasn’t exactly chaste during the War, ready, willing, and able to try just about anything with just about anyone, but most of his mid-War escapades were with people who he wouldn’t have significant contact with: commonfolk in small towns or other soldiers who were sure to be cool about it. Calroy was -- is -- different, because they were friends first and friends after, because he never asked for a more that Amethar was unable to give. In fact, after that first whirlwind hookup, Cal never approached him like that again, though Amethar wouldn’t have minded if he had; but, well, it was the War, and then there was Catherine, and then there was everything else, and... Amethar is just glad they’ve made it to this point, eventually.

They don’t go to the main training yard, because the Tartguard should be running drills right now and Amethar can only stand so much tickling with swords in the background of his relaxing afternoon spar, but settle into a smaller courtyard.

“Sparring rapiers or our normal weapons?” Calroy asks, though the way he’s already unsheathed his saber means that he knows what Amethar is going to say.

“I’ve never used a training sword with you and I don’t ever intend to.”

Calroy grins, bright as the glare of the sun off his sword, and gets into a ready position. “Have at thee, then.”

Fighting with Cal is a bit like dancing. Amethar was taught to wield a sword alongside the guard, though his personal style evolved to turn his strength into broad strikes and brute force during the War. Amethar doesn’t know where Calroy grew up or how he learned to fight, and the shadow that passes over Calroy’s face whenever he’s asked about his family or his past makes Amethar reluctant to probe, but he fights like he barely has to touch the ground, leaping and spinning and somehow managing to be everywhere with a perry or a slice. It’s exhilarating and centering.

Amethar settles into the duel, moving on instinct and muscle memory until he missteps and Cal’s able to trip him. Calroy puts a knee on Amethar’s heaving chest and his blade to Amethar’s throat, the warm sunlight making Calroy’s hair glow like a roseate halo.

“Got you,” Cal says, his voice low and weighted, like he’s pinning Amethar with his words as well as his weight. “Do you yield?”

Amethar tries to speak but his mouth is so dry that it comes out as an embarrassing squeak. He clears his throat. His voice still seems strained when he manages to say, “I yield.”

Calroy blinks, then moves, not to put down his sword but to lean in. Amethar swallows thickly and Cal’s saber moves with his throat, sun-warm, solid, and sharp in a way that makes Amethar’s stomach flutter. Calroy’s eyes are dark, pupils wide.

“I appreciate My Majesty's submission,” Calroy murmurs, and then he leans down and presses his lips to Amethar’s. He starts gently, almost tentative, but when Amethar’s hands move automatically to Calroy’s hips, Cal takes it as an invitation to deepen their kiss and Amethar feels for a moment like he can’t breathe.

Calroy’s thighs straddle Amethar’s waist to press ever closer and Amethar arches off the ground to meet him, their mouths falling open and breath mixing as one peck flows seamlessly into desperate, delighted making out. After what feels like a small eternity, Calroy pulls back and Amethar, even his soft love-struck daze, realizes that his difficulties with breathing were, in part, because Calroy’s sword was trapped between them; Amethar’s neck now features a shallow but long cut, bleeding sluggishly. Calroy all but throws the sword away when he notices.

“Oh, Amethar, I’m sorry-”

Amethar cuts him off with another kiss, short and sweet. “It’s fine, Cal. Hey, maybe it’ll scar, then I’ll have even more reason to remember today.”

Calroy huffs but he still presses gentle fingers to the wound, an admiring look in his eyes. Amethar decides to count it as a win.

[captain-aralias]

27 §!!

hello :D and thank you.

27. Favorite quote from one of your fics

hmm... i usually go for 'Hang the Moon', but let's do RE today, since i'm thinking about it. i think this bit worked out well.

I could take care of him – he seems to be shit at it, but I could be good. I saved the world, once. I could look after one vampire. Forever. For however long he lets me.

Restoration Ecology, Chapter 8

§) A fandom or ship you wish had more fic for you to read

i wrote a pretty weird response to this one already.

fandom wise, i'm pretty mono-fannish and part of what makes me want to read fic is... there being fic. i might not even read it now, but i remember almost getting into Hornblower/Bush (indeed, i wrote two fics for it) (also, if you aren't familiar with this age of sail fandom, i can tell you it's quite serious and those are their real names) but there wasn't enough of it. so i guess i would say - it'd be nice if there was more of that, in the world. but right now, i pretty much only read CO fic.

==

from this ask list

[zwoelffarben]

OP, if you take constructive criticism¹, this is unabashedly a great fic idea. In lots of folklore about Angels, Angels are jealous of the human ability to create, and lots of art has been made exploring the idea of angels putting on a human suit so they can fingerpaint.

Almost everything I know about Supernatural is osmosic in nature, so I don't know exactly what flavor of angel supernatural has, nor if this theme is ever explored in the show (I think there's something in there about angels who adopt human form become more human-like, but I don't know if the urge to create art is ever addressed specifically), but regardless of any pesky ideas canon might or mightn't have, an angel like Castiel is the perfect character for exploring this idea. Like,

The twice fallen angel is reading a book and gets an itch he doesn't know how to scratch, and he mentions it over dinner and Jack (I think that's Destiels' son), says why not write a fanfic, and Cas is like, "You can just do that? I can just do that‽" and he so excited, he writes a little fanfic about whatever book is canon to the supernatural universe that he can self-insert a Destiel pairing into and it gets views and kudos but what's this? Woe, constructive criticism upon him. He's asolutely devasted: Castiel had been to superhell and of the two this is the worse feeling. The family ask him how his fanfic writing went at dinner, but he doesn't want to talk about it because he's just so sad: that the first time he tried to do art, like a human would, he didn't do it right, couldn't do it right, and now he thinks he'll never be able to do it right. What was he even thinking; he's not human. He's a monster playing for 'the good team.' A week passes with him stuck in this meloncholy fugue. And he decides that he's going to delete the fic and vow afterwards on his true name or whatever it is that angels do in supernatural to never create something again. So he goes to delete the fic; but, there's a new comment on the fic. He braces himself for more so-called constructive criticism. But, it's not constructive criticism. It's a happy little comment telling him what a good job he did and listing all the things the commenter liked about the story, and it ends with "woe is me. I wish I could kudos twice, oh wait I can I have two Ao3 account because reasons™. Have second kudos." And, it just hits him, a wave of unrelenting joy. He didn't do it wrong. He did it right. He stares at that that comment, searing it into his memory until Dean sneaks up behind him, kisses him on the head and tells him its time for bed; It's cas's turn to take Jack to school tomorrow. And castiel goes to bed. He so distracted by the euphoria of being told he created something good in its own right that he didn't close his tabs and turn of the monitor like he normally would. Dean steals a look at the screen, and smiles. Looks like his hail mary play of reading and commenting on every fanfic written in the last week in the fandom Cas had been talking about had paid². He turns off the computer monitor but leaves the tab open so that Cas has a second dose of nice surprise waiting for him in the morning after he takes Jack to school.

Like, if I wrote supernatural fanfic, I'd be lowkey jealous that you thought of the idea first. I'm sure if you chose to actually write it, even if it looks nothing like my outline (cause I must stress I know almost nothing about the show), it'll be awesome.

¹Sorry, bad joke.

²Yes, this means Dean has and opperates two different Ao3 accounts. He made one following the God writes our adventures as a fictional chronicles incident, so that he could idk stop people shipping him with his brother or ship himself with the handsome angel. He made the second one cause he and Sam needed an Ao3 account for a hunt and he wasn't about to tell Sam he already had one laying around: Dean's the sort of machoman who projects himself as being above that sort of things. So, of course, he has to feign ignorance about knowing things about Ao3 and ABO (and of having had an intrusive thought about Sam's one time fling with the werewolf girl from way back in the day, when he was randomly reminded about it 10 years later with new cursed knowledge (She coulda been a really fucking cool recurring character and I'm still mad the writers killed her off immediately despite the fact that I care about almost nothing else in supernatural #justiceForWerewolfGirl)) and he pretends badly; but of course, Sam, who is about as dense as two bricks taped togther, picks up on none of it.³

³None of this information is stated directly in the fic. I just fell down this rabbit hole in my brain and decided I like it here.

fighting against every fibre of my being to keep from directing this rando in my ao3 comments to an online course on how and when it is appropriate to deliver constructive criticism (and how to know the difference between “delivering concrit” and “being a rude & entitled ass”)

[dudski]

Tagged by @succdale who did not think I would do this based on twenty years of observed behavior BUT CURVEBALL I'M DOING IT ANYWAY

Three ships:

1. Buck/Eddie 911, THE FIC FIXATION DU JOUR. Sometimes I find a son and I say "my boy needs a LOVING FAMILY" and then he meets a single dad who becomes the person who knows and trusts him best in the entire world, and whose kid he loves like his own, but the showrunners are COWARDS and CRIMINALS and it's just not going to happen, hence: the fic.

2. Buck/Taylor 911. Sometimes cowards and criminals make some points? BUCK/TAYLOR...IT FUCKING RULES ACTUALLY. I am extremely high on them this week because @succdale just watched S5 and Finally I Am Understood. It's fandom and we all know this but HAVING A FRIEND TO SHARE THESE FEELINGS WITH IS A BEAUTIFUL THING!!!!! Listen. I watch 911 with a heart full of love but also rage, constantly keeping a mental tally of a) Who Is Supporting My Perfect Son Buck Who Has Literally Only Done One Wrong Thing Ever And It Wasn't Even That Big A Deal, and b) Who Is Inexplicably Not Supporting Him And Needs To Answer For This At The Hague. AND TAYLOR SHOWS UP! SHE'S DOING THE WORK, FOLKS! IT'S GOOD! IT'S EXTREMELY GOOD!

3. Rich Joe/Poor Joe from 2 Joe 2 Millionaire. (It's not called 2 Joe 2 Millionaire but it should be.) I don't need more people to watch this show for the sake of having there be conversation around this show, because the show is whatever. I need more people to watch this show so that THE WORD CAN GET OUT THAT 2 JOE 2 MILLIONAIRE AUs NEED TO BE A STAPLE OF EVERY FANDOM WE'VE GOT. THESE NEED TO BE THE NEW COFFEE SHOP AU. The Joes can't be 100% honest with anyone but each other? They keep going on group dates with all these women where the Joes have to step away for some alone time so that Rich Joe can talk Poor Joe through an absolute meltdown brought on by this one woman that Rich Joe wishes Poor Joe would see isn't any good for him? They start and end every episode in quiet domestic bliss at THE GENTLEMEN'S QUARTERS? I don't care if anyone else ever learns these men's names but I need that one breakout hit AU to exist so that other people can be like "okay, this is exquisite" and it can become a common premise.

First ever ship: I'm going to say this was Rachel/Tobias from Animorphs. Nine year old dudski lived for that shit.

Last song: Last song I listened to was Liz Phair - Why Can't I, last song added to the rotation was Travis Tritt - Bible Belt aka the end credits song from My Cousin Vinny.

Last film: 12 Angry Men! I said it in tags already but THAT MOVIE FUCKS? Like I knew it was a classic but I was WILDLY invested the entire time.

Currently reading: I'm reading a book a week this year! I'm about to start Blood Sweat and Pixels by Jason Schreier bc the ebook was (and still is) on sale for 1.99. I read Of Mice and Men the other day because it was the end of the week and I hadn't read anything and needed a quick gimme.

Currently watching: Weekly: The Righteous Gemstones, The Gilded Age, The Amazing Race, Abbott Elementary, Joe Millionaire: For Richer or Poorer. Just finished Yellowjackets yesterday, starting My Country: The New Age this week.

Currently playing: Adding this in! I'm in the middle of three games right now which is usually a no-no for me but eh, with these three it works. I take a break between cases in The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles so I don't burn out, Slay the Spire has no story so it's easy enough to balance with other games, and I'm like two thirds of the way through A Night in the Woods.

Currently consuming: Cinnamon raisin English muffin and iced coffee...the breakfast of champions.

Currently craving: I don't really do food cravings BUT I NEED A NEW PHONE

I'm not tagging anyone this is where those years of observed behavior come back in

[maxburnett]

Last Dance, Bucky Barnes

Written for @buckyblues 4K Writing Challenge

pairing: 1940sFem!reader x 1940s!Bucky Barnes

genre/warnings: Angst/Fluff/Romance/Smut This fic involves smut! If you are under 18 please do not interact with this fic. Mentions of character death. Sad Bucky and Sad Reader :( Also, there's some Stucky in here if you squint on that note I left the ending up to your interpretation! Based off of the song/lyrics of the song Last Dance by Donna Summer Hope you enjoy the fic! Please reblog and review if you can ♥

words: 2,471

summary → You and Bucky have been dating for 6 months and he has some news that will change your life.

Bucky sat beside Steve as Steve drove down the road; he looked down at the old copy of The Hobbit in his hands that had your bookmark inside it. Something that one of his nieces had given him that his sister had held onto for all those years. He opened it up and saw an old sketch that Steve had drawn of the two of you all of those years ago; he closed his eyes as a single tear fell, and he brushed it away. All he could think about was you. The way you smiled, the way your lips felt against his. Sometimes he felt like he could feel your lips on his skin. But that was merely wishful thinking. He closed his eyes, holding the book close as he let his eyes drift off to sleep.

You smile as you sit beside Bucky, your head on his shoulder as he has his hands in yours. You're enjoying the sound of the music that's coming from the record that he had put on. He liked to listen to soft, slow music, but you were always more captivated by his eyes and his jawline than the music that played.

You and Bucky had been dating for 6 months, but your friendship had been just as long as his and Steve's had been. You had once punched a guy who was picking a fight with Steve, and they welcomed you into their close-knit friendship.

The relationship had been just kissing and cuddles and Bucky's hands up inside your shirt to feel your skin. He had told you that you were worth more than any other girl he had dated and that he loved you more than he's loved anyone ever in his life. You smile as you think back to the day he first told you that he loved you. He had been staring into your eyes while he had an arm around you as you read The Hobbit sitting beside him.

"Doll," he had whispered, causing you to look up at him. "I love you so much," he murmured, taking in how beautiful you looked as you read. "I love everything about you, doll," he said, causing a smile to spread across your face.

Steve sat in a chair facing the two of you, absentmindedly shading a drawing of the two of you. Bucky had been quiet, which wasn't like him. You gently moved your hand to his face, pulled his head to face yours, then looked deep into his cerulean eyes. Your fingers gently moved up his delicate features. He finally leaned a little, kissing your fingers as they were close to his lips.

"James," you whisper as his eyes find yours. He looks down at his hands that you take hold of.

At the mention of Bucky's first name, Steve closes his notebook, knowing that you only called him James when you wanted to talk about something serious. He walked back to his bedroom then you heard the sound of his door shut.

"James. Look at me. What's on your mind, Love?"

"I haven't told Steve ... you have to promise me you won't," he whispers.

"Told Steve what?" You ask, your hands finding his as he looks into your eyes before looking back down.

"I enlisted," he whispers. The slight smile that you had on your lips suddenly disappeared.

"Bucky," you whisper, as you could feel tears beginning to form. You closed your eyes, not wanting to cry in front of him. He took your head into his hands, pulled you close, and kissed you. The kiss was like no other kiss he had given you before. Soon you pulled away breathless. You clung to him as the tears fell.

"I love you. I have to do this, Doll," he says, his forehead pressed against yours. He takes your hands in his and pulls you up with him. He turns the record player's volume up a little higher. Placing his arms around your waist, he pulls you against his chest, your head resting into his white shirt as he leads you in a dance. You cry into his chest as he rests his head down against yours.

"I love you so damn much," he murmurs as he kisses the top of your head.

"I love you too, Buck," you whisper. He gives you a small smile as he continues to hold you against his form as the two of you dance with you in his arms.

"James. I don't know how I'm going to get through this. I need you by me ... without you, I don't know what I'm going to do," you murmur, looking up at him. "Make love to me," you as quietly as you could. You knew there was no guarantee that he would make it back. "Please ... make love to me," you say as the tears ran down your cheeks.

He kissed you and gently picked you up into his arms. Then, carrying you into his bedroom, he laid you onto his bed.

He laid above you, his elbows holding him up above your frame. He looked down into your eyes, his face softening as he wiped your tears away.

He kissed you. You closed your eyes as your hands ran into his hair. Your body lifted a little as he reached to pull your blouse over your head. He placed sweet, gentle kisses onto your neck, his lips moving down to your white bra as you guided his hands to the clasp so he could unclasp it.

The bra fell to the bed. You looked down into Bucky's as he placed his mouth over one of your hard nipples. You moaned and tugged on his hair and felt his tongue circling around the sensitive bud.

He placed sweet little kisses all over your breast before moving over to the other nipple and repeating it again for that breast.

You moaned as he moved lower, his fingers pulling at your skirt to push it down your legs. You wiggled out of it ad kicked off your shoes as he placed gentle kisses onto your tummy.

You could feel his lips going lower and lower until his fingers were hooked on each side of your white panties. He pulled them down, and you pushed them off with your toes before biting your lip as he looked up at you and then at your wetness.

"Already so wet for me," he murmurs and gently runs two of his fingers into your folds. You buck your hips against him, and he smiles.

"We got all night, doll," he murmurs before kissing your thigh as he pushes a finger inside of you and looks up at you loving the noises that you were making and the feel of his fingers being deep inside you. "Taking my fingers s' well." He smiles as he kisses your tummy after kissing his way up your thighs.

"Shit. Feels so good, Buck," you murmur as your hands find your breasts, and you rub them. He smiles as he rubs another finger over your clit, and your hands leave your breasts and go to his head. You pull on his hair as he removes his fingers and replaces them with his mouth.

"Taste s' sweet." He says against you before pushing his tongue gently into your core. It takes everything inside you not to rub against his face, but the moment he begins to lick and suck on your clit, you come undone, moaning out his name.

"That's my good girl," he says against you, then kisses your tummy before he lays back and pulls your naked body over his.

"Buck," you murmur. "Can I taste you?" You asked with a blushing face.

"Sure thing, doll," he says and kisses you before lying back and allowing you to undress him. You kiss his stomach and look up at him, your eyes filled with innocence and all of the love that you held for him. You promised yourself you wouldn't cry, but there was a sad way that he looked at you. You took a deep breath and continue to push his boxers down.

Your hands kneaded Bucky's thighs. He let out a gasp when your hands wrapped around his erection, slowly moving it up and down as you bit your lip and looked up at him.

"Oh God," he said, closing his eyes and placing his hands gently into his hair. "So good, doll. Your touch feels so good,"

"You like my hand ... wait until my mouth is on it," you say with blushed cheeks. Eventually, you took the tip of his erection into his mouth and took him in slowly. You gave yourself time to adjust as you looked up at him as you bobbed your head up and down slowly. His moans filled the room and Bucky pulled your hair gently.

"I need to be in you," he murmured. "Please," he said as he looked into your eyes.

You removed your mouth from his erection and kissed up his stomach and laid above him, and kissed his lips. His eyes landed on yours as he rolled you over, so he was on top again. He pushed into you slowly as you moaned out and held onto him.

"So tight," he murmured against your lips. His head leaning against you, he continued to slowly push into you, not wanting this night to end. If this was his last time with you, his last dance with the woman he loved more than anything. He wanted it to last as long as possible.

After a few minutes, you pulled on Bucky's hair pulling his hips closer with your legs. He kissed you and leaned his forehead against yours as he came deep inside you and your body began to shake as your own orgasm had your whole body shaking. He stayed inside you and held your body against his, his hand moving up and down your back, and the moment that the two of you pulled away and he pulled out of you made you feel like a knife had been slid into your stomach. He held you close like you were part of him and lazily kissed your head.

"Doll," he whispers.

"Mmmmm?" Was all you could get out due to your eyes getting heavy.

"Let's get married," he says and looks down at you. "Before I head out ... you Steve and I ... let's go to the courthouse and let's get married," he looked at you with pleading eyes, and you leaned and kissed him and nodded your head.

You and Bucky were married the following week. But, unfortunately, he was shipped off two weeks after that.

The day that you had gotten the letter of condolence was the most challenging day of your life. First, finding out that your husband wasn't coming back to you hurt. Then you learned that you had a small part of him inside you when you found out you were pregnant.

When you found out that Steve had saved him and that he was alive, he had sent a letter explaining everything to you. You felt like the luckiest girl in the world, but it got ripped away from you when you got another letter saying he was presumed to be dead.

The day you learned that he was missing and that he would never make his way back to you, you wanted nothing more than to go with him, but you knew you couldn't. You knew you had to give his little girl the amount of love that he had always given you. You gave birth to a healthy baby girl with eyes as blue as Bucky's and a soul even brighter than his smile that both haunted and soothed your dreams. It was in your dreams when you slept that you sometimes found peace in knowing that that night many years ago wasn't your last dance.

"Buck," a voice sounded, and Bucky opened his eyes and stretched his legs as he sat up. "We're here," he said as he looked out at the old-looking building. Bucky nodded his head and rubbed the back of his neck as they both got out of the car.

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"I'll be okay," he said as he got out of the car, leaving the book in the seat. He walked towards the house and up the stairs and knocked on the door, and waited.

"Just a second!" A voice said from the other side. The door opened a young woman smiled up at him. "Hi! You must be James!" she said and led him into the building and down a few halls.

"You're sure there's nobody else?" Bucky asked as they walked down the hall.

"Yeah, we had lawyers check. Your wife only had one child, and when your daughter and granddaughter passed, there was nobody else," She said before they walked into a room at the end of the hall.

They entered a room where he saw a woman sitting on the floor playing with a little girl with (Y/H/C) hair giggling as she held a Captain America figure in her hand.

"Lilly," the woman said down to the little girl who turned and smiled up at Bucky. "This is James. He's going to be taking care of you,"

"Please call me Bucky," James said with a smile as he looked at the Captain America Figure she held tightly to.

He leaned down to look at Lilly, his great-grandaughter that he was now the guardian over, and she smiled as she wrapped her arms tightly around him. Then, he closed his eyes, picked the little girl up, and headed to fill the final papers out, confirming that he had officially adopted Lilly.

He walked her out holding her hand, and Steve smiled as he walked over to where they were standing, and he leaned down to look at the little girl and smiled up at Bucky.

"You must be Lily," he said with a smile. "It's so good to finally meet you," he said as he stood beside Lilly and took her other hand in his. "What do you say we all head home?"

"Yeah!" She giggled. "You look like my figure," she said, holding it up as they got to the car.

"Why guess I do," Steve smiled as he opened the door and showed Bucky how to buckle Lilly in. Once Bucky got all the buckles done, Steve closed the door and smiled at Bucky.

"Are we really doing this?" Bucky asked as he rubbed the back of his neck with a small smile.

"Are we raising a kid together? We sure are Punk," Steve says with a broad smile as Bucky grins over at him and looks at Lilly through the window as she placed her Captain America figure into the seatbelt of her booster seat with her.

My Tag List:

@balenciagabucky @belladonnabarnes @bibbidibobbidibucky @bitchassbucky @bloomingbucky @bucksfucks @buckyblues @buckys-blue-eyes @faeryloki @fairyevans @fallinforevans @fluffycutecevans @fuckandfluff @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @lokiscollar @mickey-henry @midnightf @onceuponabarnes @stcrrynightsinneverlcnd @syntheticavenger

[oryu404]

Fairy Tail and Stingue for the ask cause I just got done Fairy Tail and Gratsu and I am filled with the need to know what you think.. lmao

Going to check out what you had to say as soon as I finish this lmao

Alright,

002 | Stingue, my beloveds.

- When I'd started shipping them:

Honestly, the ship flew right over my head the first time I watched the show. I was focused on the story, not on potential ships at all then. It wasn't until I did a rewatch and got to That Scene, the iconic "as long as he's with me," that I slipped and fell into the proverbial shipping hell. Still haven't found the exit yet. Stopped looking. Built a base here 😂

- My thoughts:

Are endless. Ain't nobody got time for that. So I'll simplify and say this pairing grabbed me like no other ever has.

- What makes me happy about them:

Everything? I love their respective character designs (yes, even their terrible fashion senses), and their personalities, and the way they complement each other. I love their dynamic, the way they obviously care about each other but can and will also bicker and fight like an old married couple. The way their fates have been intertwined since they were young, how they've been presented as a duo from their first appearance, how they understand each other like no one else does. I can go on, but you get the idea.

- What makes me sad about them:

I guess I could say the fact that their relationship will never be explicitly stated as romantic in canon, but I think more accurately would be the fact that they'll never be canon because they're both dudes. And I'm adding my... I guess frustration? that a lot of people who don't ship them would do so in a heartbeat if one of them was a girl.

- Things done in fanfic that annoys me:

Lots of things, but you know me. Emo Rogue makes me wanna stab someone 😂 And by Emo Rogue I don't mean a Rogue who gets emotional, because we all know that man is a complete trainwreck when something happens to his damn cat. I mean scene boy Emo Rogue who wears skinny jeans and listens to MCR and cries or self harms through most of the story. Just No.

Equally high on this list are literally any of the shitty yaoi tropes, like the dumb 'this character is an exclusive top and this character is a total bottom,' and any characterization that's basically the author's OC with their names and (parts of) their appearances slapped onto them.

I know no two people look at/interpret a character exactly the same way, and I do think that everyone is free to enjoy their headcanons all they want. They're just not for me most of the time. I'm fine with and even enjoy some of them, but there are quite a few I avoid like the plague.

- Things I look for in fanfic:

The opposite of what I mentioned in the previous answer: characterizations that genuinely feel like them. Again, no one's perfect in this, not even me, but it's easy to tell whether someone wrote them with their canon personalities in mind vs someone who went Fuck Canon I Make The Rules.

That, and a good storyline, or a satisfying scene if it's just a oneshot or drabble, makes for a great fic in my book.

- My wishlist:

More than anything, I wish people would create more content for this pairing, even if not all of it fully matches my (very personal) tastes. I just miss seeing more enthusiasm. Not just for Stingue, but for Fairy Tail as a whole.

- Who I'd be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA No one. Seriously. Ship and let ship, and all that. I'm not here to bash on other people's ships, but this is one pairing I just can't see with others, not even in polyamorous relationships. They just don't have a strong enough connection to any other character that isn't an Exceed for me to see other Sting or Rogue pairings as satisfying.

- My happily ever after for them:

I think they already got it. Sort of. They rebuilt Sabertooth, turned it into a home. Made friends within and outside of their guild. I think they're perfectly happy living out their days going on jobs or bickering over paperwork, coming home to a small apartment or cottage to then bicker over chores. Spending days off to relax or do something fun with Lector and Frosch. Occasionally meet up with friends from other guilds to hangout or spar. You know, stuff like that.

Can't believe this took me a literal hour to write 😂

[voxmyriad]

TELL ME OF AARON!

And his cowboyfriend :D

(also I can't remember if you've already told me abt your star wars kids but if you haven't you're legally required to)

FINALLY Monday is OVER and I can answer this!! Under a cut to save dashes, since once I start rambling I can go for a while

Aaron and his cowboyfriend! Aaron, aka Corviss to everyone else, and his cowboyfriend, Nash, formerly the country music superstar Clyde Winters. Nash is @twittertveited's boy, and I am still in love with how they met. Actually there are a couple of ways in different stories, but Corviss fresh out of 90-day rehab gets dumped in the desert, with someone his manager (and brother) knows will keep him safe and keep it a secret. Nash goes by Nash to keep his real identity a secret, and because it was the last name of his husband (don't worry, they had a long and happy life together).

Obviously they are both ornery assholes and got on each other's prickly nerves for weeks, but Corviss and his brother Josh grew up with horses on a farm, and eventually taking care of the horses started to relax Corviss. It was 90 more days in the desert before Josh came out to get Corviss, and by then they were friends. Then they stayed friends for years, and Corviss went out to the farm (it's about a four-hour drive from LA) at least once a year. His career continued, and Nash stayed contentedly in the desert out of the spotlight.

Nash was very insistent he was too old and tired and Corviss didn't really want him, Corviss was equally insistent Nash wasn't anything of the sort, and it was very good and is very good.

Corviss is currently covering a few of his cowboyfriend's songs because he has "permission from the estate of Clyde Winters" to do it. Really he just asked and Nash was like "*grumbles* yeah, why not, already saw you writing 'em."

A few years after Nash and Corviss were comfortably in their relationship, someone that Corviss used to know showed up in their lives again, Candace and her daughter Gianna, and they ended up staying on the farm too. We haven't done much with that yet but Gianna is a delight.

My Star Wars kids are pretty much just a few clone trooper OCs. There are two medics, Phase from the 104th and River from the Coruscant Guard, and the most developed OC is Sergeant Mom, quartermaster for the 212th and the guy you call if you need just about anything throughout the GAR. He's got an encyclopedic knowledge of supplies, contacts in every battalion, and made sure he stayed a humble sergeant so he could get some real work done.

He used to slip bits of candy or treats into every new piece of armor that was requisitioned, because it meant the brother requisitioning it had survived. He took great care of everyone, the clones and the Jedi and the natborn officers, so the troopers started calling him Mom and he just adopted that as his name. Also because it's really amazing for someone to say, "Do we have any spare knuckeplates?" "Dunno, ask Mom." Did I create a clone mostly for a joke on the name and then grow incredibly attached to him? Yes.

Mom ended up in a loving relationship with Cleaver, a clone trooper who cooked for the natborn officers in the 104th. In that AU, they got left behind when the GAR went into hiding because of reasons and wound up first on Lothal, where Cleaver found a job in a greasy spoon diner, and then on Mon Cala, where Mom got hired immediately as the Logistics Coordinator for Reef City's main shipping port. Eventually they adopted two Nautolan orphans, the older boy Ladat and his younger sister Thoya. Watched them grow up, then went on to help establish the new Jedi academy on Yavin 4, where they then adopted a whole batch of tubies. I am sorry to say I don't have any of this massive thing posted anywhere. Yes, it's that "If it helps, I wish there was a fic too" post.

Found family, man. It just *clenches fist* really founds that family.

[gigglyirwin]

Could I get a ship if you're still doing them? My name is Brittany and since I don't have an about page here's a bit about me. I act like a stereotypical surfer dude like from the movies but I can't actually swim. I get really attached to people very quickly and I also get super anxious all the time and it happens easily. But I'm really passionate about my friends and making them happy and safe and I love to work with kids and teens of all ages I hope that was enough info :)

ship: | calum | michael | ashton | luke |

When you and Luke first started dating, you tried to keep it as quiet as possible. You avoided public places where you could be spotted and had only told a select few people of your relationship. The secret probably could have gone on for months, if it wasn't for Michael accidentally announcing it during an interview.

Michael hadn’t meant to, but as your and Luke’s best friend, he completely forgot you weren’t public yet. You two were so comfortable around him, that he forgot the whole world didn’t know yet.

The question was, outside of the band, who do you see the most. 

Michael was quick to answer. “I probably see Luke’s girlfriend about as much as he sees her.”

The room went quiet. Luke’s face turned pale. He knew you wouldn’t be mad, but he wished he could’ve kept this part of his life quiet for a little while longer.

“Welp. Cats already out of the bag. Might as well tell you about her,” Luke began, knowing the interviewers were dying to get more information.

best friend:  | calum | michael | ashton | luke |

CALM lyric: “the hardest part of all is that we’re only built to fall”

Compliment: omg hello! I remember reading your fics like a year ago or so. They were so good! I also just liked your masterlist so catch me going through it in a few days lol

-

SHIPS ARE CLOSED

[transparentheartz]

day 12, time is flying by! i'm in work tomorrow for the first time in a while so that'll be fun! hope you've had a good week!

hopefully! i already have tickets for louis, yungblud and 5sos so i'm happy out, as long as covid behaves.

you should be so proud of yourself for getting the job then! especially since it was so far out of your comfort zone. that's good that school at least became more bearable, i think it is something we have to grin and bear unfortunately :((

math was horribly bad, i can't imagine not feeling comfortable enough to ask for help, if i wasn't asking the teacher i was making my friend go over the problem with me.

its so hard to keep friends as well as make them, i always find i'm the one holding on when they've clearly moved on... i'm trying to go day to day enjoying interactions instead of building a friendship which might be a bit sad but expectations are such a let down. you still made three friends through college even if you don't talk anymore, that's not easy to do! I'm 12 weeks in and only now making friends.

tomlinshaw is filled with angst so i love it but i never paid nick any attention in real life either. that fic sounds cool! i've never read one with alternative endings.

yeah the permanacy of tattoos is a bit frightening, i have a small one on my hip, which i do love but i wish the placemnet was slightly different so i can see how you could regret them.

do!! i'd love to hear about your sisters!! there's not much of an age gap at all!

i adore it too, even though i never finished the last season, the first few are the best, especially 3b. i'm gonna have to say Stalia... i just really really loved the development of their relationship, it was so good.

i need to listen to more bea miller, i'll add her to my monthly playlist this month!! i'm currently obsessed with renforshort whose touring with yungblud, her music and lyrics are incredible.

ahahah that was my primary school with the tin whistle, it was so messy.

i'm sorry you're anxiety was that bad :(( you have a job now though!! which is great! if you get your degree that's great but only if you can do it without too much strain on yourself mentally

i wouldn't say it has, i don't really do failing myself, the only thing i failed was my first driving test and it was so shitty but kinda common so i decided it's okay i guess

i'd love to eventually be an author, that's the plan!! but i think i'll look for a job in publishing just to have stable income and all, but goal is to write!

i love it when you click immediately with a person!! there's nothing better! and also that you managed to stay friends is so lovely, i have loads of friends i wish i could've made more of an effort to stay in touch but life happens. i'd say yous also talk loads online too!

random qs but

do you dream in colour or black and white?

if you could name your aesthetic what would it be?

also fav louis era?

bit weird qs but i wanted it to be a bit of fun i guess??

hope you have a great saturday sorry for the late reply!!

- your ss <33

hii!

hope work is good for you tomorrow. my week was long and i'm very tired but i don't have a day off until tuesday so :/

nope i suffered in silence, i hated asking questions.

it's okay, you have to start somewhere when making friends. i'm starting to make some at work :)

the only fic i can remember having tomlinshaw in it that i read is a fic where louis was addicted to pills and went to rehab and nick was his bf and was absolutely horrible to him and harry was louis' best friend and in love with him.

i haven't heard of renforshort i'll check them out.

i choose stalia too, i just don't like how long it took for stydia to get together, like i know it was realistic but i just didn't care for them. and i love malia and stiles dynamic. i lowkey liked sterek too tho ik it was only a fan ship lol.

that sounds fun, idk if i could be an author. writing fan fics are hard enough. have you written any for larry?

i would say shes the only person i connected immediately with and stayed friends with.

i dream in color but i also hardly ever dream and never remember them when i do.

i have no idea what my aesthetic is lol. laidback and frumpy ig

uhh fav louis era would be fetus or hedgehog or whatever era 2015 was, i'm bad at remembering era for the boys, except harry cause it's obvious

hope you had a good day, its okay about the late reply :)

[ecofinisher]

Next Step - RollanxGerda oneshot

I don't know what to do, so I decided to write this as a one-shot :3 As most of you on Instagram see, I have the ultimate obsession with Rollan and Gerda, it nearly kills me at some point :D Nah literally, that one last time I had to spend time watching AMV's I literally had heart issues just from seeing their romance scenes. Even writing this AN here is making me crazy. Okay, here we go.

Additional note: Both characters are 20+

Fic inspired by this image (Actually the colored version, but I can't find the link to it -_- ) and my obsessed brain.

In a restaurant in the inner part of King Harald's kingdom, several couples and some small families sat in there to have dinner served. Major parts of the guests had already received their main menu, including our main characters Gerda and Rollan. Gerda was dressed in her usual clothing which consisted of a light beige skirt, a blouse with emerald-green buttons, and a dark brown sleeveless vest. Rollan came dressed up differently than he usually would, by wearing a fully white shirt and black pants. Both love interests had as their main dish beef stroganoff, mostly it was recognized on Gerda's dish since Rollan seemed to have a higher appetite due to his plate being nearly finished fast.

„It's been almost five months since we've gone out for dinner together," Gerda mentioned. „I've been really enjoying the evening here with you,"

„I'm glad you're liking it so far," Rollan responded, then looked along with his girlfriend at the end of the restaurant, where a woman stood singing and a few other adults were playing on instruments, ensuring a good atmosphere. „I like how the atmosphere here is so calm and sweet. Mostly with their music,"

„That's so far the only restaurant I've seen so far with music accompanying us guests. That's probably another thing why this is a little expensive than the others we know," Commented Gerda. „I almost feel bad to be here," Admitted the blonde, then Rollan placed his hand on Gerda's hand and shook his head. „You don't have to. I made sure we could afford it,"

„Okay, that sounds relieving," Gerda confirmed using her fork to roll up a bit of pasta and take it into her mouth. „How was your week?"

„It was fine," Responded Rollan. „I had to accompany classes on Wednesday and Thursday over the half of the day as they were seeing the palace from the inside and outside. Two of those classes had some class clowns, which wanted to cause a mess and I had to stay on watch for them as well when the teacher wasn't aware of it. On Tuesday I've spent half of the morning taking care of the royal horses so that in the evening we could go out with them for a check-up and be able to continue our task with them the next days. There wasn't anything dangerous or bad, where I and others would have the need to interfere…..and I saw you yesterday on the morning during the ride out, remember?"

„Oh yes, if Freya didn't have mentioned it, I would have missed you," Gerda commented making Rollan chuckle.

„I would have at least greeted you or something. You know that,"

„I do and I enjoy your little visits," The girl admitted taking another bite of her plate slowly finishing her dish. „Talking about visits, my dad's birthday will be in a few weeks and I've been thinking along with Kai to make him a surprise party at Alfida's ship. Kai had some funny ideas for games all could play along to pass the time. Do you think you can come with us to the party?"

„At what time is it?" Questioned Rollan. „I've got a few days, I've been longer at work because of special occasions,"

„7 pm " Replied Gerda. „But if you're not able to come it's alright. My parents haven't seen you quite often and it would be good you three would be able to get to know each other better,"

„I think so far our relationship is fine I believe. Your parents don't treat me bad as Kai used to do once in a while after…...you know…...this with the wishing stone," Rollan whispered making Gerda nod.

„I know, but I'm referring to them knowing you in person more. They only know you through my eyes, not through their own I mean,"

„Okay, I will take a look at my plan and if there's a possibility to exchange a shift I'll do it, so we can go together to your parents,"

„Thank you, I know I could count on you," Gerda said making Rollan smile, then the waiter appeared to take their plates.

„Have you enjoyed your meal so far?" Questioned the waiter earning a nod from the couple.

„It was delicious," Gerda commented.

„The spice of the sauce was excellente. I enjoyed every bite of it,"

„May I offer you two a dessert. On Today's card, we've got Morozhenoe and we've got a variety of toppings for it, which you can choose. Nuts, chocolate, and berries," The waiter explained. „Does any of this please you?"

„The one with the berries sound appealing to me," Commented Gerda making Rollan nod.

„If possible I'd like the one with nuts," Rollan added earning a nod from the waiter and he picked up the used plates and cutlery to move away. Gerda and Rollan glanced together at the band singing, then Gerda sighed at how harmonic the singer was in sync with one cello player, which stood behind her playing the instrument.

„Their voices do really match well with the other," Commented the Spaniard, then moved his hands above the table to reach to Gerda and grabbed it to earn her attention. „Are you looking forward to pass by the stable and take a ride around the kingdom?" Rollan offered making Gerda shrug her shoulders.

„Are you sure you don't need Valiente tomorrow fully rested?" Questioned Gerda.

„Tomorrow I'll be at the castle the entire day again. I may pass in the afternoon again to feed him or to let him walk," Rollan mentioned. „I think Eriksson will be there as well, because of the cleaning duty he has tomorrow and could as well take care of him and the others. I don't know it yet,"

„Okay I'd love to go with you out if it's possible," Gerda responded making Rollan smile. „Where have you planned to walk us?"

„I haven't planned anything. I thought we could decide it during the ride or just let Valiente go on his own,"

„We'll see about that," Gerda replied, then Rollan lied Gerda's hand back down on the table and looked around the restaurant to observe the surroundings, then he pulled his collar a little nervous.

„Dónde está?" Rollan mumbled, then Gerda glimpsed at the man's comment.

„What are you asking?"

„I….uh was wondering where my…...medal of honor went, but it's actually here," Rollan made up making Gerda snicker.

„Why did you even stick your medal on your shirt for our date?" Questioned Gerda. „You don't need to do that, just because of me,"

„It's a habit of me," Rollan confessed. „I like to have them with me,"

„That's fine, I just had the impression you seemed nervous about something,"

„It will get solved, don't worry," Rollan stated earning a nod from the girlfriend. „Hopefully," He said quieter, then Gerda who still heard the rest of Rollan's phrase gazed back at her boyfriend to see him stare at the door, then Gerda moved her chair a little further and grabbed Rollan's hand, then gazed at his face a little worried.

„Rollan, are you hiding something, you don't want to tell me?" Questioned Gerda making Rollan shrug his shoulders.

„Uh just give me five more minutes," Rollan commented with an embarrassed grin, then heard the door getting opened up from the entrance, where a young boy showed up, making Rollan sigh in relief and Gerda smiled at seeing the young boy.

„Who is that boy?" Asked Gerda looking at Rollan, which shrugged his shoulders, then the boy approached their table and took from the inside of his jacket a small book and opened it up to take out a pen with a silver ring attached on the hold.

„Hello…..You're G….Gerda, right?" Questioned the boy making the woman nod.

„Yes," Responded Gerda exchanging looks with her boyfriend, which smiled at the woman warmly. „Who are you?"

„I'm Lars," Responded the boy. „I'm a big fan of you and your brother Kai…...Rollan promised me he would find a way to make me meet you," Explained the kid.

„Oh and that now?" Questioned Gerda looking at Rollan, which rolled his eyes at the kid and back at the blonde and Gerda kept her eyes on the boy, which showed her the book with the pen.

„I just want your autograph, that's all I need," Lars said looking at Rollan, which nodded, then Gerda looked at Rollan, which noticed Gerda's eyes and faked a smile at the girlfriend.

„Uh was it a bad idea to bring him here?" Asked Rollan making Gerda shake her head and grab the pencil to sign her name on it.

„It was fine. I was just surprised," Gerda commented, then placed the pencil back on the book. „There you go, little boy,"

„Thank you very much, Gerda," The boy thanked, then gave Gerda a hug making her and Rollan smile, then the boy dropped the book on the ground in front of Rollan's feet, then the boy took his arms off Gerda and grabbed the book.

„I'm glad I was able to help you out, Lars," Rollan said with a wink, then the boy waved at Rollan and ran away to the exit and Gerda spotted the pen of the boy on the ground, then shrieked along with Rollan.

„Hey Lars, you forgot your pen!" Gerda warned picking the pen up, then saw the boy had left the restaurant, afterward, Gerda sat back on the chair with the pen in her hand. „He may come back to get it,"

„Maybe," Rollan responded a little relieved, then moved his hand at the pen. „Or I will bring it back to him. I know, where he is from," Rollan commented watching Gerda show him the pen, then Rollan reached his hand at the pen and Gerda squinted her eyes and took the pen down to see the ring on the pen.

„Hey for what is this ring on here?" Gerda asked watching Rollan grab the pen.

„You know those are new variants," Rollan commented holding the pen under the table, then tried to remove the ring from it. „You know…..they have a unique way of use," Rollan commented. „Want to know how it works?" Questioned Rollan making Gerda nod.

„Why not?" Responded Gerda, then Rollan got up and stood in front of the blonde and with his left hand closed into a fist and he bends down on his right knee and positions his left leg behind, then placed his hands together and used his right hand to take out the ring from his other fist and held the ring up at the blonde woman.

„Gerda I…..I've been thinking this entire year for the moment I would ask you this question. I didn't know how I should do it or where I should do it and this option occurred to me a few days ago and I thought that's the moment Rollan. You're just chickening it out the entire time out of fear. Just do it, it will go fine. Lars there, he's actually Hansel's son from the theatre. I offered him a bit of money, so he would play as a fanboy and ask you for an autograph, but in reality, we made this up, so I would obtain the ring in a way you wouldn't notice…..or you weren't supposed to notice it," Rollan explained making Gerda smile enchanted at Rollan's explanation, then Rollan smiled a little and noticed Gerda chuckle a little.

„What's your question?"

„Gerda…..after we got together and we began to see each other, I felt like my life finally began to have a meaning for me. You made me feel like the happiest man in this kingdom. I'm certain that our love will hold on for eternity and that we complete each other. I…..you mean the world to me, Gerda. I may not be able to make a lot of money with the job I have to provide us a better life than we have now, but I'm able to do anything to make you happy…...Will you take me as your l...life partner?" Proposed the raven-haired man looking up at Gerda, which had gotten emotional at Rollan's question, and held her hands in front of her face to clean her face. Rollan smiled at Gerda's reaction, then he moved his free hand to Gerda's face to clean tears coming down from her eyes and waited for her to be ready to answer his question. Gerda passed her hand under her eyes again, then she leaped onto Rollan's arms to hug her boyfriend tight, leaning her head beside his neck making him beam and place his arms around her.

„Yes Rollan, yes I do," Gerda responded, then she got off Rollan's arms and held out her hand, so the man would take her hand and place the engagement ring on her ring finger, which consisted of a light-blue stone on the middle of the silver-colored ring. Rollan held Gerda's hand to look at her engagement ring, then rolled his eyes up at her seeing the woman biting her lip, still excited about what had happened, then he opened up his arms at the woman and she got into Rollan's arms again, therefore the duo earned the applause of the guests inside the restaurant which made Rollan feel embarrassed. Gerda felt as well abashed at the people's reaction towards their step and she gazed back at Rollan, which smiled charmed at the woman after that she wrapped her arms up around his neck, locking up her lips with his sealing together their agreement on taking a further step in their relationship.

The End.

[bitchapalooza]

I'm not really sure what made me ship Rusame as its a ship I've held dear since my earlier days in the fandom. But my views on them and their dynamic have changed significantly since then. Back then I used to kinda accidentally have a slightly abusive view on them— I was about 15-17 with barely any real relationship experience so I didn't know what I was doing(writing and drawing) was unhealthy. Nowadays I see them as a more passing/past relationship or an on/off relationship that's built on healthy competition(as in running or something); it depends on context. But yeah I have zero recollection of when I first started shipping them but I do know when my views on them changed at least.

And to name a few more off the top of my head...

I got into Prucan from just seeing A LOT of fics of them. Some fics with pairings I had already shipped included Prucan on the list. From there I just sorta fell in love with the dynamic. The fics were all mostly 2015/16 fics on ff.net I think so it had a lot of shy Canada and protective Prussia and I've fallen out of love with that kind of Prucan dynamic. I see them as equals in the relationship but with Canada kinda having like a better grip on it because honestly I don't see Prussia having that good of dating skills despite how extroverted he is, but Canada totally does because he's just good at reading people and knows Prussia's boundaries/wants/needs just from watching his body language and listening to him.

With Turkind(Turkey x India) I found a couple oneshot collection fics(or it was one fic?? Dont remember...) while just browsing the Turkey tag on ao3. They were nsfw, didn't exactly enjoy them since, well, I wasn't expecting to read that sorta stuff that day, but I fell in love with the pairing either way. I wish there was more sfw content, and content in general, I could find of them tho :( I like thinking of how they'd interact in certain situations sometimes.

And lastly Cankraine. I don't know the artist or where to find the content from its original source(I think the links always lead back to pintrest sadly), but I think it was a human AU where Canada was married to Ukraine and they were having twins. I'm a sucker for sweet and happy family stuff and they looked like a sweet and happy family! From there I kept looking at what little content of the pairing I could find and just sold my soul to it!

I want to thank @thatsamericano personally for singlehandedly making me fall in love with Romano x America and further falling in love with both characters. Thank you. My hyperfixation for these fictional characters grows stronger. You've put everyone in danger. I am Romerigeddon. Earth will fall to its knees as I take my rightful place as god. Fear me for I have no understanding of what "one true pairing" is. THEY ARE ALL MY ONE TRUE PAIRINGS.

/jk I'm just being dramatic and tired ....or am I? ;)