#i will singlehandedly fucking fix the better man tag if i have to

[gothwizardmagic]

Me with the floorshow Kickin' with your torso Boys getting high And the girls even more so Wave your hands if you're not with the man Can I kick it (yes you can)

ROCK DJ - BETTER MAN

[buckys-black-dress]

a fine line, part three

a/n: okay. here we go. part three bitches. tbh i write these author’s notes before i start writing, which is why i also have one at the end of the chapter-- so idrk how many more parts this baby’s gonna have. also, tumblr fucked up and ate my first draft, so fuck you tumblr. but here we go! enjoy, again, thank you for reading/sharing/commenting/reblogging whatever etc etc. i love you all! <3 -ali

wc: 2.5k

-

You truly think that you’re going to throw up. 

You haven’t moved out of your apartment since you came back from James’ apartment. 

Your phone has been non-stop vibrating since you got off your phone call with Natasha, and she’s the only one you’ve kept updated on the situation. You told her she could... vaguely explain to Wanda and Carol what happened, but you couldn’t bring yourself to leave your apartment. 

You were a mess, to say the least.

Natasha had tried to come by to see if you were alright, but you couldn’t let her in. You were embarrassed. James kissed you, and he made you look like a fool. He thought he could make things better by kissing you, but every time you remembered what his lips felt like on yours, all you could feel was humiliation.

Did he think you were that easy? That if he kissed you and slept with you, that it would erase your past with him? 

You didn’t know what to think, and it was eating you alive.

You usually knew. You knew how to think rationally, to think things through, and to make the right decision.

But now, you felt like you knew nothing.

And now, you have to show up to class next week and teach alongside the man who made you look like a joke. 

-

On the other hand, James was quite literally losing his shit. 

He felt like an idiot.

After he kissed you, he realized two things.

One, he was idiot.

And two, he liked you. A lot.

Well, it was more or less Steve that led him to both conclusions, but hey, he got there.

When he called Steve after you quite literally fled his apartment, he realized just how fucking stupid what he did was.

“Buck, you gotta see this from her perspective. For a year, you ridiculed her every chance you got, and all of a sudden you spring all this shit on her that you didn’t mean it, etcetera etcetera. And then you kiss her. She’s quiet, shy. I don’t talk to her about personal things much, but Nat knows. She trusts her, and she tells her about everything she’s been through. A week ago, she thought you hated her. You just humiliated her and made it look like she was easy, someone you could kiss and fuck and move past your history with her.” Steve spoke through the phone to his friend.

After listening to everything that Bucky said, Steve couldn’t understand just how stupid his friend was.

“I- I never meant for it to be like that. I do like her, a lot. And I feel like such an idiot for what I did before. She- After watching her sit in my house, after seeing her with Alpine, I just... I realized just how fucking wrong I was... And now she’s never gonna talk to me again.” Bucky realizes, and it hits him like a ton of bricks.

“Okay, you’re being dramatic, Buck. You guys still have to teach together next week. You just need to find a way to straighten things out with her by then, or else someone’s gonna report back to Fury that you two aren’t doing what you’re supposed to. And we all know that you don’t wanna be in trouble with him.” Steve continues to explain. 

‘You’re right... But how do I even reach out to her? She’s not gonna answer a text or phone call, but I don’t think she would appreciate me just showing up where she lives... And I don’t even know where she lives.” He tells him, trying to think of any way to reach you. 

“Well... I don’t how much I can help you from here. Just... be careful, Buck. Don’t end up doing more harm than good. Okay?” Steve carefully warns him.

“Yeah, I know, Steve.” Bucky tells him. “I gotta go, I’ll talk later man.” He concludes, promptly ending the call.

-

It’s Saturday, and Bucky’s panicking.

Why, you may ask? 

Well, other than the fact that he made a dumpster fire out of his relationship with you, he singlehandedly made all of your friends who were staff at Avengers University hate him.

He’s spent the morning calling Natasha, who promptly picked up and hung up right after. Then Wanda, who didn’t even bother answering. Finally, Carol. Carol didn’t really give away much, but she did want to help. 

Carol didn’t tell him which apartment you lived in.

But she did tell him what building you lived in.

“And why should I help you, Barnes?” Carol asked, well on her way to her meeting. 

Bucky was running to catch up with her, clearly walking faster to avoid him.

“I- Listen, just, give me something. Natasha and Wanda ‘ve been avoiding me, and I know they’re not gonna help. I-I’m desperate.” Bucky practically begs, and Carol can’t say she’s not shocked.

“Well... how far are you willing to go?” She stops her walking and asks. 

“I-I’ll do anything. Please, Danvers. I’ll buy you coffee for a week. Y-You can have my parking spot! Anything!” Bucky was ready to get on his knees if he needed to.

And that’s exactly what Carol wanted to see. 

“Hmm... I don’t know... How do I know you’re actually sorry for what you’ve done?” She questions, nose in the air. 

“Carol, I know I fucked up, alright? Steve and Sam can barely even look at me, Natasha and Wanda are ready to rip my head off on sight, and plus...” he paused, trying to lift the weight off his chest, “...plus, Y/N means a lot to me. And I know I acted like a goddamn idiot before, but it’s different now. I... I like her, a lot, and I never meant to hurt her. I... I need her to understand that.” Bucky was out of breath from his rant, and Carol squinted her eyes at him.

“I’m giving you one thing. You have to figure it out from there. Or else Y/N, Nat and Wanda would kill me.” The blonde says after a moment of silence. “She lives in the Livingston Towers. That’s all you get. I’m late to my meeting, bye.” She says, flipping her hair while strutting away. 

Now, it’s Saturday morning and Bucky’s at the lobby of your building. Although it’s definitely not half as lavish as his own, it was still lovely. Warm, cozy. The man sitting at the desk watches him as he approaches his small desk, and Bucky looks pale as a ghost. 

“H-Hi, I’m looking for someone who lives here?” He asks more than he says, making the man even more weary of him.

“Does this person know you’re coming to see them?” The young man asks dismissively.

“No, but uh, I was hoping I could see them anyways? I just need to know what apartment they’re in if you don’t mind-” Bucky speaks but is cut off short by the young man with the name tag that reads “Adam.”

“Listen, man, you’re not the first shmuck to show up here, begging me to let them up to see their ex that they ‘need to make it up to.’ If she’s not answering her phone when you call, maybe that’s a sign you need to let that shit go, dude.” Adam tells him, looking at his phone screen.

“Hey, kid, listen. She’s not my girlfriend, but I do need to make it up to her. I fucked up, but we’re colleagues, and we have a project that we’re supposed to work on starting tomorrow, but I don’t think she’s gonna show. I-I just... I need to see her. Please.” Bucky’s about to get on the ground, but instead another idea pops into his head.

Just as Adam’s about to dismiss him again, Bucky pulls out his wallet.

He pulls out a crisp $20 bill, slipping is across the counter. 

“Please?” Bucky’s voice is hanging on by a thread. 

“Fine, man, this girl better be worth it, I could lose my job-” 

“Yeah, yeah, get on with it. Her name’s Y/N Y/L/N.” Bucky says, waiting for the boy to type in the name.

“She’s in 10C. Good luck, bro.” He says, sitting back lazily in his spinning chair.

“Thanks,” Bucky can barely say before he clicks the button to call the elevator, hopping in and pressing on the 10 button.

He finds your place with quick ease, but he stands there for a few seconds, pondering. If he knocks, will you even answer? If you know that it’s him, will you open the door? What if you’re out, what if you went to grab coffee or something for Lucy? What if- 

And before he could think even further, the door swings wide open, shocking Bucky. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” Your voice was hoarse, like you hadn’t used it in days. 

You looked... horrible, to say the least. But James was glad he was even looking at you right now. 

“I-I we need to talk. Please.” He says, hoping you’ll hear him out.” Just give me five minutes. I’ll leave after that.” He pleads.

Wordlessly, you walk away from the door, leaving him just standing in your doorframe. He assumes this means you’re agreeing to the five minutes.

“Well?” You say, sitting back down on your couch, waiting for James to plead his case.

“L-Listen. I... I can’t even begin to explain to you how fucking sorry I am. I’m a complete idiot for thinking that kissing you was going to fix everything between us, for making you feel like I was trying to embarrass you by kissing you. I just- in the moment I thought it could’ve been the right thing to do, but after it happened I realized just how dumb I was to think that. And you have every right to be upset with me. Also... we still have to do our lessons together starting tomorrow, and I just wanted to know that we could still work together.” 

You sat in silence, petting Lucy who was curled up into your side. You held a mug of coffee in your hand, watching James intently. 

“Also, how did you know I was here?” He asks, brows furrowed.

You snort at the question, shifting in place. 

“Adam called me to warn me that a very persistent man was coming up, and that if I needed to escape to go out the fire escape or the storage closet and hide.” You say, giving no indication as to how you were feeling.

“He may be easily swayed, but he’s not a complete idiot. But you... you are a complete idiot.” You tell him.

Bucky’s chest tightens in an uncomfortable way, in a way that makes him want to throw up his breakfast.

“Did you just come here to see if I was still going to work with you?” You ask, waiting to see what he’ll say.

“Well, that wasn’t the whole reason. I needed to know that you were alright. I hurt you, and I understand that. I also don’t expect you to forgive me, but I need you to know that I know I fucked up. I’m sorry I didn’t realize it right away. And I’m even more sorry for making you feel like you weren’t enough this past year. I guess... 

I guess it was just my way, albeit childish, of coping with my feelings for you. When I first met you, I thought you were so beautiful, and I wanted to get to know you. But you were so quiet, and I just thought that was you rejecting me... So, I’m sorry. For everything Y/N.” James concludes. He stands up, moving towards your front door. 

“James, wait.” Your meek voice rumbled out as you stood up.

“You... you did embarrass me. Borderline humiliated. You shouldn’t have acted that way with me, I’m worth more than that kind of behavior. That being said, I appreciate you coming here to try and work things through. I... I was so hurt. You hurt me so bad, James.” He opens his mouth to apologize yet again, but you shake your head, continuing. 

“I liked you too. When I first met you, I thought you were so attractive. Intelligent, handsome, friendly. But then you started acting so... so different around me. I- I didn’t know what I’d done to make you so angry with me, enough to tear me down every chance you got. I was new, lost, fresh meat. But when you started saying those things, I was reconsidering my contract with AU. I appreciate the apology, but I’m going to need some time to process... whatever this is. Of course I’ll still do the lessons, but that doesn’t mean we’re buddy-buddy now, okay?” You finish. 

He’s looking at you. It’s like there’s something more you want to say.

“I just... I- how do I know you’re for real? With all this, I mean. How do I know you’re really sorry?” You ask, finally letting it out, your voice crackling.

“Y/N... How about this; this week, while we teach together, let me make it up to you. Let me show you just how sorry I am, that I’ve really changed. Please, let me make it up to you.” Now, he’s literally on his knees in front of you. 

Lo and behold, James Barnes. In front of you, on his knees. On the floor of your apartment. 

“James, get up, please.” He promptly stands back up. “You have one week. One week to show me you’ve really changed, that you really mean what you’ve just told me. That’s all you get.” You tell him, staring at him.

“Okay. One week. I’m not gonna let you down, Y/N. I promise. You’re gonna see how sorry I am, I swear.” James says, slowly making his way out.

“Okay. I’ll see you at work tomorrow, Barnes.” You say, holding the door, ready to shut it.

“Here I was, thinking we were on a first name basis.” He jokes, already outside.

“Watch it, Barnes.” You put extra emphasis on his last name, shutting the door as he steps into the elevator.

As you turn back into your house, you look at Lucy, who’s watching you with big eyes.

“What the hell is he gonna do, Luce?” You ask, plopping back down onto your couch and mindlessly turning on the TV again. 

You couldn’t even pay attention to it, just thinking of what this week will bring.

-

a/n: ooookaayyyy hey yall! end of chapter check!! sorry this one was short, this week has been literally kicking my ass. i had 6 labs due for my anatomy class today. anywayssss.... what do we think bucky’s gonna conjure up for this week? lmk in the comments what you think !!! kk, love you, bye!