#i watched 2 episodes at work yesterday and got through a third when i got home lmao

[cicaklah]

star trek picard episodes 1-3 thots

THE THOTS ARE BACK

So this post directly follows on from the angry freakout I had earlier this week where I live incepted myself into watching picard season 3 ride or die, because sometimes you've just got to go down to the highway and watch the car crash in person.

also, I reminded myself that I dont care about other people's star trek opinions, only my own. therefore, I needed to have star trek opinions.

here are my thots, here be spoilers

first off: gates mcfadden's face lift is fucking spectacular, the woman looks amazing. Her eye sockets are so sculpted, her cheeks are so taut, her jawline is so sharp, and yet she still looks her age. this is what growing old in the socialist utopia promises: you too can look like a woman who has not actually had to work since the early 90s. also credit to everyone looking great in their 60s, 70s and 80s.

second: jack crusher (the second??!?! how does that work anyway), is so fucking hot.

third: I went into this knowing broadly what happened in episode 1 and 2, and that episode 3 the twist is changelings, because I saw a spoiler yesterday on una mccormack's tumblr. changelings is interesting, because to do a ds9 plot in tng is bold, especially when you can't bring odo back since ya man rene audeboujournois died a few years ago. worf doesnt even mention him by name: ffs worf raffi was alive during the dominion war, she'll know who fucking odo is. he's odo.

fourth: the moment I was like, I am here for the long run was Worf's whole introduction and his everything. I think its always hard to give credit to michael dorn for being so great because he has to act stoic through SO much makeup and he just is worf, but honestly, it felt like if they'd just put the black hair on him he would have looked exactly the same as he did thirty years ago. Like they had to make his hair white just to make time have passed. The man is so well preserved, maybe he also has a very good surgeon, but I am down to believe that he just Is Like That. Damn.

five: worf is the best thing that happened to raffi, I love them together, they are the best team.

six: all of this is going to fall apart when brent spiner comes to Lore it all up, as that is obviously what was stolen from the daystrom institute alongside the portal gun.

seven: so episode 3 won me over because I had kind of forgotten how good an actor patstew is when he really gives it?? because fuck me the scene between beverly and picard where they talk about how the whole baby thing happened was so good, so subtle, so emotive. It also crucially made sense: they had tried to be together. they had failed to be together. crusher was tired of his shit, he's always been a terrible partner and it just didn't work, but then she was pregnant and ready to leave anyway, ready to move on, so just went, fine, breakup over, beverly out. Also, reminded picard that the universe keeps trying to kill him, that he'd basically killed her husband and her son, and she had no other family....thanks for the sperm donation, I'm gonna go retire and have a redo. I was already 100% team bev but now I am 200% team bev, also fuck off picard with your 'oh yeah actually I wouldn't have been my horrible abusive father fuck you for taking me at my word, my whole /r/childfree carefree bachelor attitude, how could I have known anything about myself in my early 60s, I was but a boy, we could have had it all, rolling in the deep' etc. Father and husband fuck the fuck off you traditionalist old bastard you just told us you had broken up for the FIFTH TIME.

eight: should have reserved point seven for seven herself but: SEVEN!!!! I am fucking going to do it, I'm going to write the seven of nineifesto. She is so fucking deep waters, shes been so betrayed by authority figures none of who actually give a shit about whats best for her, just for what is best for the story, she is not meant to be in starfleet ffs, she got the worst possibly mentors in janeway and picard. also seven and raffi just need to hang out with worf and tell the rest of them to fuck off.

nine: captain shaw was right and he should say it. He was having a nice time, just running his ship, doing his duty, when he gets fucking hijacked by two guys who literally are mavericks and crash ships all the time, who are manipulating seven, who MUTINIES, and they literally destroy his ship and ruin his life in the space of about 12 hours and he saw through their bullshit within 30 seconds of the 'surprise inspection' gig. justice for captain liam shaw, only sane man on the titan.

ten: look, the show is never going to stick the landing, but like all star trek, it is a journey. there are changelings, there is worf, there is raffi, there is my forthcoming 200k seven of nine fix it fic, there is so much to enjoy, and also there was the absolutely awful deaging makeup, please stop doing it, it made me feel seasick.

anyway these are my thots on yaoi kthxbye

[hieronymus-botch]

Happy 16th anniversary of iCarly, everyone! Ok, so I've been putting this off for a while, and probably the hype has died down such that no one will care about this at this point, but I finally got around to watching the iCarly revival, and I have some Thoughts. (sidenote, I didn't even realize today was the anniversary until yesterday, I had to marathon the entire third season this morning and am currently typing when I should be sleeping so I can prepare for my birthday trip to Dallas tomorrow so I can get this out today.) Spoiler alert: They are generally not positive thoughts. Disjointed rambling potentially spoilery details below the cut.

Ok, I'm just gonna come right out and address the elephant in the room: It just isn't the same without Sam. I have nothing but respect for Jennette McCurdy and utmost sympathies for what she went through and cannot blame her at all for not wanting to reprise her role, but none of that changes the fact that of the problems I have with this show, a solid 80% of them are at least partially attributable to a lack of Sam.

With the sole exceptions of Kevin and Sully because I am a sucker for cute animals, ever single new character the reboot introduces sucks. Harper is a cookie-cutter sassy black woman stereotype, in season 1 Millicent is just straight up an asshole to everyone for no reason, and even in the subsequent seasons where her assholishness is toned down, "11 year old businessperson" is an incredibly cliche character archetype that every sitcom ever has used and she does not do a particularly unique or interesting rendition of it, and all of the other characters don't have enough of a discernible personality for me to say anything about them other than that they're annoying and not funny. I especially didn't like the show's pre-season 2 approach to a supporting cast where instead of introducing secondary characters and then having them come back periodically, it would introduce a character, have them be the focal point of roughly three consecutive episodes, not be funny or interesting for any of them, and then disappear into the ether and be replaced by a new one. Also, Paul is quite possibly the worst of the bunch and I suspect that the only reason he wasn't phased out like most of the others is they already got all the actors from the original they could and were willing to settle for actors from different classic Nickelodeon sitcoms just to activate people's nostalgia glands.

Despite in theory being the defining feature of the show, the iCarly webshow is so rarely relevant to the plot of this show that I'm pretty sure if it were any less relevant, calling the show iCarly would legally constitute false advertising. It's occasionally tangentially relevant to the plot and once in a blue moon there'll be an episode that can generously be called "about the webshow", but if you just go through each episode and make a list of the things they're about, "the iCarly webshow" doesn't even make the top 5. As previously mentioned, I suspect this is because they don't know how to make the webshow segments work without Sam.

Due to a combination of the lack of Sam, severely reduced presence of the webshow, and the characters being adults now, a majority of the original series's sources of conflict are no longer available. The writers have chosen to compensate for this by making Carly into an insecure moron who repeatedly tells off-the-cuff lies she has no hope of backing up for no reason other than to seem more talented or successful than she is to people she ususally doesn't even particularly respect, and also intermittently turning Spencer into a douchey asshole who forces his wacky ideas on other people whether they want them or not.

I really really hate how Freddie's mom's deranged and abusive behavior is treated like a cute quirk and he continues to put up with it even after he has the means to do otherwise, and after the episode where he decides to keep living with her even though he has a job and a girlfriend and a kid, all of the awful shit she did to him is just implicitly forgiven without her ever apologizing or admitting wrongdoing at all and now she's just Part Of The Gang. If I were Jennette McCurdy, I would probably interpret this as some kind of incredibly fucked up slight against me by the writers for declining to reprise my role, but more charitably they probably did it this way because her actress was one of the 4 from the original who were willing to reprise their roles on a regular basis and they're desperate to cling to anything that maintains a connection to the original series.

It's especially funny how the show confronts the fact that in the original the gang practically tortured Lewbert for the crime of being ugly and having an annoying voice, but like, de-confronts Mrs. Benson's insane helicopter parenting, which the original pretty much did acknowledge was super fucked up but the revival as previously mentioned doesn't?

The whole love triangle/will they or won't they romance element was always my least favorite aspect of the original, and I don't like it any more now that there's even more focus given to it. Creddie is frankly the most boring generic "he was a boy she was a girl can I make it any more obvious" ship imaginable. Perhaps I'm being paranoid but I think a lot of small subtle things I don't like about this show can be attributed to the fact that they knew all the queer fans would lose interest as soon as there was no sam to ship carly with so they pivoted hard to the "aggressively normie straight girl" demographic. If Sam were on the show at all I am 100% certain they would've made sarly canon but due to circumstances beyond anyone's control but Jennette McCurdy's thankfully dead mom she isn't so they instead chose to give us even more of the same generic interchangable hetero Main Boy X Main Girl romance the original already had.

None of the Spencer romance episodes work for me either, because in the original, spencer's girlfriend of the week would have some kind of unique trait of her own that would put spencer in a unique situation, wheras in the reboot the joke is always just "spencer is a weird goofy guy and has weird goofy relationship habits."

Why the fuck did they keep the laugh track. They've already changed a million different other things both big and small, even the music and sound effects specifically are noticeably different, why the laugh track of all things. No more laugh tracks. Society has progressed past the need for laugh tracks.

I fucking hate Carly's apartment. This is 100% unironic. Designing a set that looks unique and distinctive while still being a space the protagonist could believably live in is genuinely a very important part of making a sitcom at which the original succeeded and the revival fails. You could probably take someone who's only ever seen one episode of iCarly several years ago and show them a picture of Spencer's apartment set without any of the actors and they'd recognize it. I could go on Zillow or Airbnb right now and find a thousand domiciles that look identical to Carly's apartment.

On a more positive note, I found it genuinely very sweet how Carly tried her best to go all out for Freddie's birthday despite the fact that she hates hers.

Once again I'm probably just being paranoid but I'm suspicious that they wrote iCause a Cat-astrophe and titled it that so people would presume that the "cat" in the title referred to Cat Valentine from Victorious in order to generate more hype.

I'll admit, the finally learning about Carly and Spencer's mom and the big cliffhanger ending of her showing up at the wedding was pretty exciting, but like, they're calling out their mom for walking out on them, but not their dad for choosing to go live on that submarine when they were already down one parent and forcing his son to take on a parental role for his younger sister that he didn't sign up for?

Beyond this point the thoughts basically stop being criticism and start being minor nitpicks:

The original series repeatedly pointed out how weird and sad it was that Spencer didn't have any adult friends, but after 10 years he now has even less friends that aren't via his sister given that T-Bo appears to have skipped town. In the draft of this post I had in my head before I watched season 3, I was also gonna mention Socko being conspicuously absent and make a joke that since this can't be explained by his actor saying no because he didn't have one in the first place, that maybe this is a Ken Penders type situation where Dan Schneider somehow personally owns the rights to Socko specifically somehow, but then Socko and his various unusually aptly named cousins abruptly went from being mentioned zero times in seasons 1 and 2 to 3 times in season 1, so like, is that actually what happened and it took them until season 3 to get the rights to Socko back from him somehow?

In the original series Webicon was supposed to be like Comic-Con and Vidcon at the same time and in the reboot it's a Fyre Fest expy and I am immensely curious how exactly they got from point A to point B.

There is no way in hell Fredward Benson became the coolest most popular kid at school in the like 6 months between Carly and Sam leaving town and graduation. As previously mentioned this show has a lot of contrived plots but that one takes the cake.

I notice they make a lot more pop culture references than they did in the original, even to kid-friendly media. Probably this is due to different IP-related restrictions on streaming vs traditional TV. Some of them are genuinely good but a lot of them were very dated and cringey even when the episodes aired.

What the hell does Mrs. Benson do for a living? Possibly she's old enough to be retired now but she had no visible signs of a job and ample time to abuse Freddie in the original. Is she just getting mad alimony from Freddie's dad?

There were both an episode about Carly throwing an Italian dinner party and a whole arc about Spencer opening a restaurant and Spaghetti Tacos are mentioned in NEITHER of them. This is automatically unforgivable.

In the cold open of i'M Wild and Crazy where they're all playing Never Have I Ever, spencer says "never have I ever gone skydiving", when uuuh, yes, yes you have spencer, you all went skydiving, it was a major plot point in iGo to Japan, a special movie-length episode that was one of the most memorable in the series.

Why are the pearphones shaped like normal phones now? Could the prop department really not have been bothered to make the pearphones again so they just stuck pear stickers on real cell phones and called it a day?

Given how he was a full-on core cast member by the end of the original, I find it very weird how Sam is repeatedly mentioned and we get a cute little lore reason why she's not in the show but Gibby is just treated as if he never existed.

In conclusion, honestly, I think if they wanted to make a continuation of iCarly aimed at adults who grew up with the original, the best way to do it would've been to make it about Spencer. Actually cast someone as Socko, maybe introduce some new characters like a snooty, pretentious more successful artist to be spencer's rival with, or a cute art supply store cashier who he has a will they or won't they with, that kind of thing. It could sort of be a spiritual antithesis to Frasier, y'know, snooty uptight academic vs goofy manchild artist. Failing that, I think they really should've just left iCarly to rest.

[baronessblixen]

(This was typed at the speed of light so hopefully there aren't any grammatical errors.)

I spent yesterday catchin up on Frasier-- got through Season 1!

I adore all of them as characters, Martin and Daphne's friendship, Niles and Frasier's brothership, Niles and Marris? Meris? Merys?'s problems that are given nuance AND that there was an episode dedicated to exploring Niles's realization that he does (indeed) love his wife, Eddie and the puppies that stared at Frasier, too, LILITH (I really, really liked her-- I know she was meant to be an antagonist, but she didn't strike me as that from the moment I saw her... we'll see, though), ROZ (I love her so much-- hilarious and cutthroat to win her award, etc.) Bebe (AN X-FILES EVE! and she's fantastic!) was a curveball; and it's not that she's a great person so much as a great character (twirling Frasier's chair as the peanut passes. HILARIOUS.)

There were so many times I laughed out loud, actually out loud: the homeless man mentioned on the radio program and the twist near the end in 'Miracle on Third or Fourth Street', October 21st in 'Call Me Irresponsible', Meris? sleeping under the pile of coats in 'The Crucible', every time Martin speaks, Frasier's fever dream and crazy eyes and office disaster in 'Fraser Crane's Day Off', the MANY finale twists in 'Slow Tango in Seattle' (the granny's face as she walked into the other room almost killed me), basically all of 'The Matchmaker', Daphne's animated retellings, etc. etc.

Their serious episodes are just as good as their lighter ones; and the conversations had in 'Dinner at Eight', 'Here's Looking at You', (I was hoping Irene would work out, oh well), 'Beloved Infidel', 'Death Becomes Him' (the last "you're not Jewish" was amazing, btw), 'Guess Who's Coming to Breakfast' (this hits harder in our current age of social media), 'The Show Where Lilith Comes Back' (love that, though she and Frasier didn't love each other, they were both able to talk it through and build each other back up), 'A Midwinter Night's Dream', 'Fortysomething' (every. single. perspective. was so succinct of every single angle of this conversation), and 'Flour Child' (Niles and Fraiser talking about selfishness and that N's actions weren't) are exquisite.

I can't pick a favorite episode-- they feel like one congruous experience where one slots into the other and they all are just part of everyone's daily lives. It makes perfect sense why this is your comfort show-- how it's shot and scored and written makes it so comfy cozy and stress-free even when it's stressful. Wonderful~.

I WILL say that it's almost ironic that Niles seems to have had more parenting time with his sack of flour than Mulder did with William.

Welp, gotta run! Will let you know how Season 2 is~.

So glad you're enjoying it! And yeah, the characters are so great. I love every single one of them. The reason I still love Frasier so much is for precisely the reason that it made me laugh out loud, too. That usually isn't a thing for me when I watch sitcoms. There are several scenes on this show where I still laugh so hard when I watch them.

It's good that you like Lilith (I do too) cause she pops up a few times during the show! As for Maris... well 😂I love it whenever they go a bit more serious. Like you said, they do that so well. You can tell the show had amazing writing.

One of my favorite episodes from season one is actually the finale. Where Frasier and Niles are at Nervosa and they talk about happiness. It's so good. Or Author, Author. There really are too many great episodes. And it just goes on like this throughout the whole show! :D Flour Child is one of my favorite episodes. And Niles definitely had more time with his flour child than Mulder had with William. That one hurts 😂

Hope you'll like the other seasons just as well! Loved reading through this - and talking about Frasier cause I haven't done that in ages. Thank you 😊

[illfoandillfie]

back to keeping you up to date with my woman in white watching experience: i'll be honest i find laura kind of annoying and feel like marian and walter would actually make a great couple BUT laura is also incredibly relatable bc i too would be willing to risk it all for victorian era painter ben hardy

omg i love these updates

i love marian so much! the way she dresses is enough to make me swoon a little tbh and every time i watch it im like walter ya moron shes not engaged and youd be cute as shit together but alas he does not listen. 

lowkey wanna read the book now, see how close the adaptation is and all that.

but yeah you are absolutely correct, laura knows whats up and i can’t hold anything against her cause lord knows id wanna break off the engagement my father made for me to a baronet on his deathbed just to run off with victorian era painter ben hardy

[soobadnoonecanstopher]

Touch it for Real, Part 4

Genre: Humor / Fluff / Eventual Smut

Warnings: OMG they were roommates / slice of life / slow burn / mutual pining / crude humor / cursing / virgin!baek / idiots to lovers

A/N: The song featured in the kitchen scene is Fantasy by Mariah Carey.

Characters: Baekhyun X You/Female Reader

Description: You teach Baekhyun how to date. (Basically the Get You Alone M/V)

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5

You were puzzling. Alone in your bedroom, laying within the comfort of your own bed, you were positively puzzling.

After sorting out just who Ben was and fixing the damage Baekhyun had done to your reputation by explaining that your idiot roommate had just gotten a hold of your phone, you reintroduced yourself and apologized for the confusion.

This ‘Ben’ actually seemed to laugh off the odd behavior he’d gotten as a first impression of you, mentioning that your roommate seemed funny, if not weirdly protective of you.

You could see what he meant when you read through the rapid fire questions Baekhyun had asked him from his age, to his preferred operating system, whether or not Ben had Facebook so “you” and him could be friends, his profession, and his parents line of work, his current place of work, how long he’s worked there and whether or not he moves around a lot, his hometown, his hobbies and even whether or not Ben has now or has ever had any pets; it seemed that Baekhyun had actually done a whole lot of legwork to give you a pretty good idea of what Ben might be like.

But the moment Baekhyun’s conversation topic changed to innocently ask Ben for his astrological sign, something struck you as off to see Baekhyun proclaim you to also be the same sign and after the two compared birthdays you began to find the whole exchange quite odd.

You realized that Baekhyun had simply lied about your birthday. Baekhyun knew your birthday. Why had he given a fake date to Ben? Unless there was something else happening that you didn’t understand. Then again, Baekhyun had always been rather stingy about giving out personal information; both yours and his. He was probably just being cautious about revealing too much to a stranger.

And actually, Ben seemed rather …. nice. You always hesitated to give them this adjective right off the bat as most of the guys you met who seemed nice right away turned out to be very good at faking nice and stringing along at least three or four girls at once for the shot at fucking at least one of them, and the hopes of fucking all of them.

You’d been called the wrong name late at night, whispered through a sleepy voice over the phone. You’d been sweet-talked and then abruptly called a bitch for refusing to send nudes to a guy you’d been talking to for only a week. Apparently a week was his limit and all his other girls gave him what he wanted within a couple of days. You’d been ghosted by nice guys who felt victimized and led on when you said goodnight politely with a smile and a wave instead of inviting them inside for ramen.

You did want a nice guy. But you wanted a real one.

What you wouldn’t give for one of them, for just one of them to be honest with you and really show you their true self.

Perhaps you had been going about it all wrong.

Your conversation with Ben quietly fizzled and you put your phone away to charge and now, now you were simply puzzling.

It panged at your heart to think of it, but the upset with Baekhyun hours earlier kept replaying in your mind. You propped your feet up on your wall and let your head hang off the edge of your bed, enjoying the way the gravity pulled at the blood in your brain and you tapped your fingers on the bed absentmindedly to the soft beat of music you heard playing from his room.

And you puzzled.

Don’t use your beauty as a weapon against me.

You hadn’t been this bothered by something since you’d watched that Mission Impossible movie the first time and spent an hour and a half trying to wrap your head around the complicated plot.

A Weapon.

Your beauty … a weapon … against me.

Why did it bother you so much? Why had he been so upset that you were playing with him, that you were messing with him. He messed with you all the time. You messed with him just as much. He never got this upset. No, he never got upset in this way. In such a way as to call you out on using something you had, against him. Something that you hadn’t even known had any power at all to attack the man. Your beauty. Did you have such a thing?

You thought about the other times you fought with him.

Not really fought, the two of you never did that, but that fake sort of fighting like when he’d woken you up at 2am for the third night in a row with his loud working music and you found him out in the kitchen disassembling your favorite toaster, the one with the wide slots for bagels that also toasts four slices of bread at once and even has special buttons for frozen items. The stainless steel one that you won in a work raffle and proudly marched through the office carrying with a huge smile on your face. It was a deluxe model. Supreme even. The master of it’s craft. Said so right on the box. Your toaster in a million pieces on your kitchen counter; all because he needed some components or resistors or whatever the fuck it was and he decided the best move was to take your toaster apart rather than to just order what he needed online and wait two business days for them to arrive.

Sure, he put it back together a few days later but not without enduring the laser eyes you shot him over breakfast when you had to toast a piece of bread in a frying pan on the stove like a loser who did not own a four slice Deluxe Toastmaster Supreme.

You’d planned your revenge then. It was something tiny and it involved his TV remote. His precious TV was enormous, took up almost the whole wall, OLED or SUPER-NANO or ULTRA-NANO some similar nonsense words and had 8-Ks of pixels or so he claimed and had so many smart functions you could hardly get comfortable using it for anything that didn’t involve the Netflix button. And no, no, you didn’t do anything to the actual TV. Relax, this was just the remote. This was harmless. Absolutely harmless. Easy to solve really if he had half a brain in his head.

You just carefully cut out the smallest tiniest piece of IR blocking tape that fit exactly over the infrared sensor on the remote control and fit so well it was undetectable to the human eye. Unless you knew it was there and knew exactly where to stick your fingernail in under the plastic bezel to peel it back. You simply applied the tape and left the remote right on the coffee table before you left for work.

You’d come home that night to a pile of assorted battery packs all strewn about the coffee table, and the remote completely taken apart down to the tiny circuit board and Baekhyun was quietly touching the tip of some tiny tool to the different spots on the scary looking green part from inside of the remote with all the metal bits stuck to it and when you slowly walked by he looked up at you through the magnifying eye glasses he wore. His eyes looked comically enormous and you swallowed away your laughter and considered how long you’d let him suffer.

“Something wrong with your remote, Peanut Butter?”

“It was working fine yesterday. I just don’t understand it.”

“Maybe it’s the batteries,” you offered innocently and he just ignored your helpful suggestion as he began screwing tiny screws into place with a precision screwdriver.

He was reassembling it all now and you sat down beside him on the sofa about as amused as you had ever been to sit and watch him suffer.

He grabbed two new batteries from an unopened pack on the table and aimed the remote, pressing the buttons again and again. Nothing happened.

He was surprisingly calm about the whole thing and judging by the various shopping bags and different brands of batteries you saw, he seemed to have been working on this all afternoon. Probably for hours now.

“I’m going to have to take the TV apart.”

He was already standing up and walking across the room toward the wall mounted monstrosity when you leaned forward for the remote. He glanced back at you as you did it and he looked at you just in time to see you shake the remote back and forth and then hit it twice lightly against your left hand. Just a little knock-knock should do it. You were careful to keep the expression on your face calm and well controlled.

When you pressed the power button, the big TV came to life and you pressed the button for Netflix and scrolled through your recommended titles. You had a new episode to watch. You’d have to make time tonight for that. After he was done with his little project here.

Baekhyun instantly pulled his hands away from the TV and hopped back and away from the screen, peering up at it with his mouth hanging wide open. His eyes shot back to where you sat on the sofa holding the remote control. You did not allow your smile to form. Nothing in your whole life had ever been so difficult. You felt as if you could pop right here. You casually flipped through the menu on the screen and the man looked back up at the TV and back down at you again.

You could see him coming in then. He was moving fast with several large steps toward you and with the quickest movement you could manage you used the tip of your finger to slide the IR tape back over the remote sensor. You could not be as precise as you had been before with him coming right at you so quickly, but hopefully it wouldn’t be visible.

He reached for the remote. “What did you do, how did you fix it?” He held it up and pointed it toward the TV. Again, the remote did not work. You bit down hard on the inside of your cheek.

He was pressing buttons again and nothing happened with each new button he smashed down. You could see the madness growing in his eyes the more he tried.

He made the smallest whining sound from the back of his throat and it took every ounce of self control to keep from laughing as he lightly tapped the remote twice against his hand just as he had seen you do. Nothing.

You tried to hold it. You tried so hard. A tiny sound escaped, the smallest sniffle with a laugh broke free from your throat and you coughed lightly to hide it.

His face turned on you and those crazed eyes were back only instead of directing them at the remote, he was looking at you now.

“How did you fix it? Do it again.” He looked insane and desperate and a tiny smile betrayed you as you grabbed the remote from his hand. You played the smile off as part of the help you were willing to offer him but you also had to inhale a deep breath and carefully and slowly exhale it through your mouth to keep from breaking completely.

You held it up in your right hand and gave it a little shake. As quickly as you had done it before you turned the remote on its side as you gave those two little knocks and his head flipped toward the TV when you aimed. With his eyes averted you were able to slip the tape off just before pressing the button.

The Netflix logo greeted you and Baekhyun threw his head back and let out a loud frustrated yell into the ceiling above him.

You’d been holding your laugh for too long. It was becoming too difficult now and he was back, reaching for the remote when the first suffocating giggles took your composure and you laughed out loud.

Your laughter brought all of his attention right to you and only you. The entirety of his focus shifted and that brought those crazed eyes of his bearing down on you, wide and demanding.

It was, by far, the most successful and meanest prank you had ever played on him to date and you were gasping for air and laughing as he reached for you. He grasped both of your shoulders and he shook you as you laughed and laughed at the absolute madness in his eyes. Oh he was crazy. It was just so damn funny.

The remote was still in your hands and you flipped through the different inputs on the TV as you cackled and tears formed at the corners of your eyes.

“How did you do it? You devil! Tell me how you did it?”

He balanced with his knees on the couch and his hands were on you, roaming over the fabric of the sweater you wore, lifting your arms to look under them, maybe for spare remotes or for hidden batteries or secret formulas, who knows what he thought he might find.

You’d stashed the tiny circle of tape by sticking it to the skin inside your elbow and he was currently examining the fingers on all of your hands up close as if they concealed all of the secrets he was looking for.

It wasn’t until he searched higher, pulling your hand forward toward his chest and his thumb grazed against the shiny plastic of the tape circle you had on your inner arm when he did a double take, pulled your arm harder and lifted an accusing finger to point at the tape.

“What is that?!” He clearly thought himself to be the world’s greatest detective.  

You allowed yourself to be manhandled by him a little bit more as you got every bit of humor about your recent victory out of your chest and you lifted your other hand, the one he did not have held hostage right now to wipe at the tears that had fallen from your eyes.  

“Stop laughing and answer me, woman! What is it?”

“It’s my birth control patch,” you said through a laugh and his eyes widened as he pulled his hand back. It was a tiny movement but you were so close to his accusing eyes that it felt monumental and the dramatic reaction to your teasing lie made a fresh wave of laughter bubble up in your chest. You knew he would react this way. Any mention of your contraceptives always made him clam up.

“It’s IR tape, Baekhyun. Infrared blocking tape. I put it on the sensor this morning after breakfast. After I made toast in a pan instead of in my toaster.”

The truth pulled his whole head back and he fell down on his butt on the sofa briefly before he slipped and fell right off the couch onto the floor and he sat there with a blank lifeless look on his face; staring ahead without any focus in his eyes.

“Do you know how sad pan toast is, Baekhyun? Tell me, how am I supposed to be satisfied with pan toast when I should have been having Deluxe Toastmaster Supreme toast?”

He was shaking his head back and forth as you spoke and when he did move it was to lay down flat on his back on the floor of the living room. His hands were up and he rubbed roughly over his face.

“Oh my god. Oh my god—it’s so good. I would have never checked for tape over the sensor. Fucking tape. A piece of goddamn tape. I was so focused on the batteries.I went to three different stores today. The circuits to the sensor were all intact, I checked it, it was good — I never even considered this. Are you an evil genius? My sweet innocent Bug ... is actually an evil supervillain.”

You left him on the floor and made your way into the kitchen to make dinner. It was your night to cook and thanks to the man stewing on the floor of the living room you had to do it around the scattered carcass of your third favorite kitchen appliance.

You remembered the way he reacted then. He pouted and moaned on the floor for a few moments until he smelled the stew you were cooking on the stove. It was comfort food. Something with meat and potatoes and warmth and spices. It would lift anyone’s mood and his had been lifted almost immediately. There were no apologies or any tears. Just a promise to put the toaster back together tomorrow after he went to the store for the parts he needed and that was the end of it.

He didn't storm away. He didn't raise his voice or say you were mean or unfair or too beautiful for him to withstand. He didn't get angry about closeness being used the wrong way, in a way that was unfair to him. In a way that could hurt him, like a weapon.

If he said you had the kind of beauty that could be used against him, didn't that mean he found you beautiful? Wouldn't that mean that Baekhyun found you attractive?

The words protested inside your mind. You shook your head.

That was impossible. Definitely. You’ve been so close to him for so long without even a hint of that sort of a feeling from him. Sure you were close to each other. Sure you cared for each other. It was a familiar sort of affection you shared. But attraction? Because he found you beautiful in a way that was unfair?

The puzzling was giving you a headache. There were some things that just did not exist in the same space in your mind and that was the existence of your roommate, Byun Baekhyun, and the possibility that he was attracted to you in any way.

You’d been inside your bedroom for hours now and you were no closer to answers than when you first came in here.

Baekhyun would be done with his episode. He would have watched it with Mia and discussed themes or scenes or dramatic moments with her. Did he talk to her on the phone or maybe though a headset as they streamed the episode together.

Did he like her voice and did she like his jokes?

Did he make her laugh? Of course he did. He made everyone laugh. Baekhyun was charming and hilarious. But could she make him laugh? Could she make him giggle and shake like he laughed with you?

It was late. That didn't really mean all that much to Baekhyun, as the man didn't really have any set bedtime and usually just fell asleep when the sun began to come up. It was a weekend night and you didn't have work in the morning and frankly your curiosity had grown too much for you to just stay in here and fall asleep without at least checking on how the streaming date went.

You knocked lightly on his door. You could hear music playing inside. Nothing too loud or crazy. The man seemed to be having a somewhat low key evening.

“Yeah,” his voice called lowly and you opened the door and peeked your head inside.

“How is our girlfriend doing?” Baekhyun was sitting on his butt on the floor in front of his bed with his head laid over his arms and his phone abandoned in the middle of the floor out of arm’s reach.

He let out a long low groan but did not lift his head up when you stepped inside.

“I don't even know. I don't know.” He sounded defeated already and this had only just started.

“Peanut, what happened?” You picked up the phone and unlocked the screen, searching through his apps to find the dating app so you could see if they had said anything to each other that might give you some clues about what went wrong.

“Nothing happened. I was too quiet. I couldn’t talk at all. I didn't say anything during the entire episode. Why is this so scary. Uggghhh...I feel unsafe. It’s gross.”

You stepped over him and climbed onto his bed, sitting up against the head of the bed as you scrolled through the chat logs.

It looked normal. Not unfriendly. A little terse and abrupt on his part. The man didn't know how to loosen up when he talked to girls and you wondered if maybe you needed more one on one lessons with him before he was really ready for this stuff.

When you leaned back against the headboard you felt the bed dip and he climbed onto the bed beside you and angled his body toward where you sat up against the pillows.

When you got to the end of the chat you could see that she was the last one to speak and she remarked that he felt a bit different from when they spoke at the beginning of the day. He didn't say anything in response to that.

Baekhyun moaned with his eyes closed and he turned his head into your waist. He was obviously reliving some perceived embarrassment he must have felt during the interaction with Mia and when he moved his arm around your waist you looked down to find yourself trapped under his arm that constricted as he pulled tightly, hiding the entirety of his face somewhere in the shirt you wore. He was warm. The weight of his arm around you felt nice.

“I felt so unsafe,” he repeated his complaint from earlier and his voice was obscured and muffled as he hid himself. He switched the tense though and you wondered if he no longer felt unsafe now that you had come in.

You typed out a quick response to Mia. You didn't think it was right to just leave her hanging without an explanation for his strange silence during and after the show.

“I’m going to tell her that you were so quiet because you were nervous. I’ll also thank her for watching the episode tonight.”

You heard and felt a hum and the tightness of his arm around your waist relaxed a little as his arm went slack. He did not move though. He still hugged you. He was still warm and it took only a moment for your nose to pick up the pleasant smell of his clean bed sheets fresh from the dryer. You both had a schedule for washing things like towels and bed sheets. Yours had been cleaned today as well, but something about the smell of his bed felt better than yours had. Perhaps it had been all that difficult puzzling that had tainted yours.

Mia responded right away to your message. She was flattered by his nervousness. You could tell with the way she reassured that he really didn't have to be nervous around her. That she was an easy going kinda girl. Low maintenance she said. You scoffed at the thought of a computer geek being low maintenance. As if you didn't know how difficult to obtain fancy GPUs were and how expensive high powered CPUs, high capacity SATA drives, and their required cooling systems were. You looked around Baekhyun’s set up and figured it had to run somewhere in the multiples of tens of thousands of dollars; just in this room alone.

Low maintenance. Please, she was just as high maintenance as any other regular girl just with a different catalogue of parts.

You switched to the emoji keyboard and keyed off some random happy faces and closed her chat window with more force than was necessary; suddenly and unexpectedly irked when she responded with similar emojis and the notification popped up on the screen. You swiped it away quickly to be rid of it.

“She sounded nice though, even if I couldn’t talk. She sounded nice. Do you think she will even want to talk to me again? I think she likes you more than me.”

“She will like you. If she doesn’t she’s an idiot. A girl would have to be an imbecile, Peanut, to not fall for you.”

He lifted his face then, just enough for the corners of his eye to peek out and you looked down at the side of his face as he looked at you for a moment, absorbing the encouraging words you spoke to him. His leg began to shake somewhere on the end of the bed. You could feel the rhythmic motions. He often did this when he was tired.

You had been scrolling through matches on his phone, building on an idea that popped into your head.

The man needed some practice to build up his confidence. Maybe, just maybe you could find another girl. Someone who he could talk to, chat with, be friendly with, that maybe wasn’t just so wonderfully perfect for him. Someone just to break the ice with.

You stopped on a girl. Her dress was short and the neckline was low. She really left very little up to the imagination with this outfit. Outside of the revealing clothes, it was clear that she was a beautiful woman. She was sexy and very confident in herself despite the glaringly obvious grammatical typo in her bio.

You spun the phone around to show him.

“She looks nice,” you said. Baekhyun blinked at the phone and pulled his face back a little to see the image clearly.

“—-follow you’re dreams — you are — Never too old to follow you are dreams.” Baekhyun read out the sentence with the typo out loud and you laughed.

“Come on, she’s pretty,” you said softly, “right?” You probed gently and he chuckled once to himself and closed his eyes up with a sigh.

“Yeah, she’s pretty,” he said after a while and you felt yourself stiffen just a little bit with his admission. Of course she was. Anyone could see it. He’d be lying if he didn't admit it.

“Okay but like, just pretty or do you also think she’s beautiful?”

He hummed some non response and you focused your attention back on the phone in your hands. After scrolling through a few more profiles you found another woman whose beauty shone brightly right through the screen at you.

“And her? Is she pretty or is she beautiful?”

Baekhyun’s eyes opened again but just barely. He looked half asleep and you wondered if the reason his arm was still around you was because he was so sleepy he didn't realize he was still hugging you like this on his bed.

“Pretty,” he mumbled and pushed his face into your waist again. This time the shaking in his leg began to settle and you could hear a slow steadiness in his breathing.

“Should I message her? Maybe we can practice talking to her so you’re not so nervous talking to girls?”

“Sure Bug,” he said quietly, “you can do anything you want.”

He was falling asleep now. You could feel the change. It didn't matter. You’d let him rest a bit while you opened up a chat window and began talking to Candy.

She responded quickly and had a completely different feeling from Mia. Maybe this was good. Candy was easy to talk to but she had nearly nothing in common with Baekhyun. She casually asked what a computer programmer did and when you went into specifics you had trouble finding synonyms for words that didn’t just make it all more complicated. You finally settled on a simple explanation of what kinds of computer software Baekhyun had developed and left it at that.

After a while Baekhyun shifted in his sleep and uncovered his face. His lips were parted and from the upside down angle you could see the dark splash of his pretty eyelashes that landed over his soft cheeks. He looked lovely and peaceful. All the worries and fears of the day were gone and he was sleeping so calmly. You watched his sleeping face for a while, growing warm inside with the strange contentedness you felt.

You could see some light movement behind his eyes and you wondered if he was dreaming about anything.

Candy had asked for a picture. She was asking something superficial like what sort of car Baekhyun drove and you slipped into his picture gallery for the folder with the shots you took for him when he first bought his car. You found a nice one with him smiling behind the driver’s seat, bright red seatbelt across his chest and the logo of his fancy ride on the steering wheel.

‘Wooo, baby boy an Audi? you must be loaded. When are you gonna come pick me up in that?’

You laughed at her obvious reaction. Candy was exactly as you expected her to be. Baekhyun would be able to laugh and chat with her easily without too much pressure of impressing a complicated woman like Mia was. Candy was an open book. The stakes were lower with Candy.

Your giggle made him stir and you looked down to see his eyes open a tiny bit before he closed them again.

“It’s going well with Candy,” you whispered and he inhaled a breath and nodded his head as he closed his eyes again.

“Mmm, the pretty one?” he asked in a sleepy voice and you hummed your confirmation. Something buzzed inside of you; just a bit of nerve. Call it gumption.

“Baek,” you called quietly and his lips parted with his breathing but his eyes stayed closed this time. He did not respond. He didn't give any indication at all that he heard you call him.

“Baek, what about me?” Your voice was tiny when you asked it. You felt more warmth in this bed suddenly. You felt it in your chest and it seeped up to warm up your face too.

He hadn’t responded at all to your question. It had been pretty unclear though. He might not have heard it, or might not have understood it. Or his sleep may have just been too deep to register your words.

“Am I pretty or am I beautiful?” You said it so quietly there was little chance of him actually hearing it. He was asleep and you were just here, trapped in his embrace on his bed as he slept and you puzzled over the words he had told you during an upset. The words that you had pried from him when he was vulnerable and emotional. The words that you shouldn’t be over analyzing like this. Those words felt too risky to be giving this much thought to.

Here you were again, using your sneaking methods to try and trick him into something when you knew it wouldn't work, when you knew there was nothing really there and you were reading too far into things.

His steady breathing continued. His eyes remained closed and his arm still gripped around your tightly, holding you still, holding you close to him as he slept.

So you gave up. You’d moved back to the phone to respond to Candy; something silly and lighthearted, something easy just like she was, when you heard him speak.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” he said so far under his breath the statement sounded more like air than actual vocalization of any kind and your fingers stopped their rapid typing in the middle of your sentence.

Your eyes looked down. Your entire body was frozen. Half of you expected to find his eyes open and a wide teasing smile on his lips, begging for you to take the bait and believe his words just for the chance of laughing at your shocked face and making fun of you for being stupid enough to believe them.

He was asleep. His eyelids did not pull open when you looked down at him and his breathing remained as steady as ever.

Baekhyun was asleep.

That damn puzzling — your jaw was sore from clenching your teeth down and your lips were dry and chapped from biting them.  

You had dropped the phone and it disappeared somewhere amid the bedcovers.

Baekhyun’s sleep was deeper now. He must have been very tired to be falling asleep so recklessly like this. You shifted downward and made some attempt to find the phone without waking him up and your small movement made him inhale a deep breath through his nose and he was moving now. You felt him shifting, moving his sleepy body up higher in search for some comfort; for something to lay on that was a bit more comfortable than flat on the middle of the bed like that.

You used the movement to reach for the blanket and pull it over his body so he could be warm at least and when he finally settled he shared the same pillow as you. His forehead rested against your shoulder and he was once again, fast asleep.

His arm though— you found yourself still very much trapped in nearly the same embrace as before, just shifted. A forearm landed over your chest and you felt a new heaviness of his bent leg land over your thigh.

You could wake him.

You could push him off and let him roll the other way so you could make an escape back to the peace of your own bedroom.

You would. You would do that soon.

Your current state of thoughts was simply too overloaded to follow through on any game plan. If you could only have a few more minutes of his warm steady breathing, you would move away from this. You would do it.

It wasn’t that you had never considered it. It was that you had gone through many lengths to come to this place. You were safe and secure here.

It was that you had nowhere else to go when it was over.

This place was your home.

Peanut was part of that home.

Things were nice right now; the way they were at home.

But…

As they sometimes do, and against your own will, your thoughts wandered.

You wondered as they wandered — wondered about him.

From the deepest parts of your mind; down where you’d shoved them roughly many times before, those wondering thoughts danced and swayed lightly to the soft music playing in this room.

Those secret thoughts about the sweetness in his eyes. Secrets about the fondness you felt for the little tips of him; the tip of his nose, the tips of his fingers, the pink tips of his ears. Thoughts you refused to encourage.

Baekhyun was asleep and you were thinking.

With the thinking came the shame and your skin was hot to the touch. The last thing you wanted was to ruin your home. With the thinking came the denial. You could not encourage anything. You could not afford to become complacent. You did not need these thoughts to become so brazen. You did not need them taking root. The last thing you needed was them making an appearance again.

The sounds he made while dreaming pulled your closed eyelids back open. You turned your face toward the sound. It was soft, the small groan from the back of his throat. But his face changed then; eyebrows screwed together and his lungs constricted as he let out a softer sound, like a whine. It was a complaint. His face showed signs of pain. The dream must have been unpleasant.

You lifted a hand then, shifted within his embrace you raised your palm and laid it carefully over the side of his face.

The shift happened with the warm contact and his features evened out and that pained look was gone.  

You smiled then. So sleepy but satisfied that you could help when he needed it.

You would move after he got a little more sleep. After he’d had a little more comfort from you, you would move.

You weren’t the first to move. And it seemed by the change in light that shone through the windows that your visit had lasted much longer than you had intended.

It was the untangle that woke you up. A conscious and deliberate lifting of limbs; the careful grip of a hand lifting your arm by the wrist and setting it gently down on a flat mattress.

You opened your eyes when he pulled his own leg out from between your thighs. The temperature change was most jarring. You had felt so warm before.

Baekhyun was sitting up in his bed. His hair was standing up in places all over his head and he was moving slowly and carefully, in an attempt to disengage himself from the tangle of this woman he had just woken up with.

The sleep was still very thick in your head. It hadn’t been a full night’s sleep had it? You felt like you had just closed your eyes a minute ago and yet the sunshine was so bright outside already.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun whispered when he realized you were now awake and looking at him, “guess I got too comfortable...must have fallen asleep.”

His voice was thick with sleep and with embarrassment too, you could hear it everywhere, with the quick words he spoke to you and the pink that covered the back of his neck and flooded his cheeks too.

This situation...this was an embarrassment. Of course it was.

This was something that should not have happened. Not with two adults of similar age who shared so many liberties with each other; spending time in each other’s arms at night, well…

You felt awkward all over. What if—what if you’d done something in your sleep? What if you said something?

And he already wasn’t meeting your eyes as he climbed out of the bed and awkwardly made his way into his bathroom.

You could hear the sound of the running water faucet and the door closed with the smallest click like he went out of his way to close it as softly and quietly as possible to avoid disturbing you any further.

You could feel the heat burning on the skin of your cheeks and you used his absence to get up and get out of his bedroom before he came out and found you still, still tangled in his bed sheets like you’d been tangled in his legs and in his arms all night.

You had to ignore this. You had to forget it ever happened, and anyway, you were best friends with the guy...right? Wasn't this thing bound to happen in the course of a friendship? What if you went on a holiday with him and the hotel only had one bed? These things really did happen, you read about it on twitter once. Would you be that asshole best friend who let him sleep on the floor just because he was a man? No! You could build a little pillow wall between your bodies and sleep as still and motionless as possible, like a corpse.

This feeling would go away. The red hot embarrassment would wash down the drain of your shower. The sticky warmth left behind by his skin would go with it.

You’d made it as far as to undress and turn on the hot water when an awful memory dawned on you.

Baekhyun still had your shampoo.

You didn't have any other shampoo in this bathroom that you could use. You pulled open cupboards and drawers, searching for anything; tiny hotel sized travel bottles, a nearly empty bottle under the sink for a rainy day, even maybe something in the trash can that still had a few drops. Nothing.

You eyed the hand soap on your sink and pictured stepping out of the shower a frizzy, tangled mess.

A soft knock vibrated against your bathroom door.

“Bug, your shampoo.” Baekhyun’s voice called out, muffled by the sounds of the running water and the door itself, “it’s almost empty, but there’s a little left. Sorry, I’ll run to the store and get more.”

Your ear was pressed against the door so you could make out everything he said; so you could listen carefully to the tone and delivery of his words to see if he was still embarrassed about last night or if he’d brush it off easily like he did most things that seemed to bother him.

There were another two soft knocks, “B-Bug?”

“Yeah, Peanut, thank you. Can you just...put it by the door. I’m already undressed. I’ll grab it in a bit.”

He did not respond right away and you stayed with your ear against the door waiting for some sound. Some indication that he had left. The click of your door, anything.

“I left it by the door,” you heard his far away voice shout and then the click of your door.

When your shower was done and you were dressed in your favorite weekend outfit, the high waisted comfy shorts with pockets and a cute top that made you feel somewhat pretty even on a casual day and you emerged from your bedroom feeling ready to face whatever weird moods or wacky situations accosted you today.

You found him singing a song to himself in the kitchen as he made something that smelled delicious for breakfast. The radio was on a pop station that played hits from all the past decades and the upbeat rhythm of the song that played was a definite favorite that had him dancing at the stove.

It was a groovy little love song, quite old now that you thought about it and you felt the beat hit hard in your chest with each pop of his shoulders and hips. The joy you could feel in this song hit you just like that beat hit; heavy and prominent, and you smiled wide to welcome this morning mood it brought with it.

When you stepped into the kitchen to grab a mug to make yourself some coffee you couldn’t help but sing along to the song, you loved the song as much as he did and when he noticed you enter the room you could hear him singing the main parts; expertly, even though the singer was a woman, his voice could always reach the high notes as well as the low ones. She was the kind of epic singer with one of a kind of talent that was world dominating. Baekhyun was singing along, doing the same kinds of ad-libs and vocal runs that she did and he did it while holding the spatula up to his face like a microphone.

As you walked by he dipped his head and looked into your face and his eyes caught ahold of yours. You knew what was coming. You could hear it coming in the song, the chorus. The part you had to sing. These were the rules. He leaned hard and brought the spatula up to your lips just in time for your part to come on. You did not disappoint. You gave it your all closing your eyes up tight and throwing your head back, singing from the very center of you, this part you always sang during this song. The part that was made for you; he knew it and you knew it.

His smile was genuine and breathtaking and he grabbed your hand with his spatula-less hand and pulled you into him, the beat taking over whatever bit of nervousness he might have had before. This was different. This was dancing. This was singing to simply the best song for a Saturday morning and it was moving and laughing with your best friend and you let him spin you in a small circle, careful to keep your coffee mug lifted so it didn’t hit anything during the spin.

His sense of rhythm was perfect. His hips moved as if they were made for this. You had no choice but to follow. An occasional hand on your hip told you where to go. The song was reaching its peak and you knew it was a short one. The best ones always were. It was going to begin winding down now. It was always such a sweet and short lived moment of happiness that you always appreciated immensely.

As a final move, he gave you a little spin and released you to go on your way toward the coffee maker you so desperately wanted to get to when you first entered this kitchen.

He finished the eggs with the last notes of the song.

As you both sat down to eat, his eyes met yours and yours met his and you dug into the eggs and bacon he’d prepared. You offered him a perfectly buttered toast slice and he took it, nodding his head as he bit into the crisp corner.

“So Bug,” he spoke up between bites of eggs, chewing and swallowing thoughtfully, “about this...Candy.”

You swallowed the hot coffee in your mouth and clasped your hands together, suddenly remembering how asleep he had been when you had hit it off with Candy, his practice girl.

He listened to your explanation. Your theory that the stakes were simply too high with Mia and he needed someone to talk to that was a bit more of a relaxed task for him. You called it easy mode so he might get the game reference. He ate and listened to you talk and occasionally his eyebrows would lift or screw together with whatever sorts of thoughts he was thinking inside his head. You could tell by his body language that he didn't exactly want to start something with Candy and you had to emphasize that it was really just for practice, talking to her. It was to help build his confidence.

“She’s already in, Peanut. She thinks you’re super cool, she thinks you’re rich and thinks you have a very good job and plus, you make lots of money and she seems super into that.”

He was not speaking yet, despite how much you had talked and you were beginning to get worried that he didn’t see the benefit of practicing his conversation skills a little bit.

“It’s not even real, Baek, you just have to make some things up with her. Just to get over that anxiety about talking to women. Just until you are more comfortable.”

When he finally did speak, it was as you feared.

“It just feels kinda gross, Bug. She’s a real person too, even if she is obviously a gold digger. It just seems wrong. I’ve been...thinking lately. What if this is...wrong of us?”

“What if I just have to tough it out with Mia and get the fuck over it and just,” he thrust his hands forward over the food on the table for emphasis, “just — blehhhh — talk, just fucking talk to her.”

You lifted a fork with eggs toward your lips but your stomach protested. You suddenly didn't want any more food. The coffee you were drinking had suddenly gone too cold for your liking and you pushed the plate and mug away from you with your fingertips.

You were bothered.

Why did he choose right now to suddenly grow a conscience about this? Did he forget that Mia was chatting with both of you and not just him?

“I...I just — I want to try with Mia. I know I can get over it and talk to her. And I don't want to talk to Candy. The person Candy thinks I am, well...that’s just false. I can’t be the person she’s expecting me to be.”

He had obviously read through the entire conversation with Candy last night and found the tales you told simply too stretched out for him to try and live up to.

“But that’s what people do when they start dating. They stretch the truth, make themselves sound just a little bit better, make themselves taller, or make themselves look richer. They all do this.” You simply could not understand why he didn’t get this. Why he didn’t just play by the rules that everyone followed to get through the door so he could stand a chance here.

“Well I don't. I don't want someone to fall for a fake version of me. I want someone to like me now. This me. Byun Baekhyun. The Peanut with anxiety who lives with Bug who almost killed him over a cheese stick, but who makes really great toast.”

He was smiling now, joking about the funny memories. You pulled your lips into a forced smile and lifted the coffee for another drink so you didn't have to smile any more.

He was watching your face. You were sure he sensed it. Something had bothered you to the point of giving up on your breakfast and every pass your eyes made over his face led to the same thing. He was watching you.

“Why are you upset?”

You shook your head lightly. Willing the obvious signs to leave your face. You didn't even know why. You didn't have a name for this. So you just shrugged in response to him.

“Because I don't want to practice on Candy? Did you actually like her for me?”

You really made your best attempt. You inhaled deep and closed your eyes and you shook your head.

Candy did not matter and you knew it. There was something ugly inside of you maybe. Something that did not want Baekhyun to get along with perfect Mia. Something that was fighting against the idea of him being happy and healthy and free of this unhealthy attachment you had to him. Free and happy away from you.

“Then why?”

Enough. You were being unfair to him. You had promised him that you would help him. You had gotten him this far and you’d be the worst kind of asshole if you didn't see him through to the end; if you didn't follow through with your promise to find him someone who would love him like he deserved to be loved, exactly as he was now. The amazingly wonderful Byun Baekhyun.

“It’s nothing like that,” you smiled softly. It felt like a sad smile, but at least it was genuine. “I just worry when you get so anxious. You know you fell right asleep last night. As soon as I came in, you passed right out.”

Your words skillfully slipped out of your lips and you successfully changed the subject. You felt like a coward, but you simply did not have words for what was happening to you.

“I didn’t...say anything did I? Before I fell asleep?”

This question was quiet. His fingertips grazed over his lips as he asked it, nearly muffling the words he shyly asked you at the breakfast table, the morning after.

You are so fucking beautiful.

You are so fucking beautiful.

You lifted your coffee cup to drink the tepid liquid inside and dropped your eyes from his shaking ones. The answer to his question sat on the back of your tongue even after you swallowed away the liquid.

You swallowed again and it refused to budge and yet you sat in silence, unable to utter a single word in reply to his quiet question.

Your silence went on for too long and he looked up into your face. An instant smile lifted at the corner of your lips and you forced it up into your eyes.

“You just slept, Peanut. We—” you had to exhale the breath that you had been holding for too long in your lungs, “we just slept.”

 Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5

Tag list: @j-pping  @blahblahblah-boo  @his-mochi-cheeks  @amyeonzing@littleflowercrown13  @baekinmylife  @insta1010  @nana-banana  @f4ncyvelvet@bbhbeth  @totallynerdstuff  @byunbabybaek @maijinki @bbyunz@theclawofaraven

[unsaid-stardust]

Touch Me Like the Pouring Rain

trigger warning: this fic implies mild depressive episodes. 

Luke used to love the rain. He often found himself on the walkway of the studio when it rained; back when he was alive that is. Now? Now he couldn’t feel the rain like he used to. 

He couldn’t feel the baby droplets that raced down his arms; washing away whatever was troubling him at that moment in time (because the rain always seemed to hit so perfectly). He couldn’t get the shivers down his spine that he used to when he sat in the walkway, the ones that always made him remember why he liked to write. He couldn’t just sit and feel things anymore.

And it hurt.

It physically caused an ache in his chest. It was nothing like the pain from the jolts that were caused by Caleb’s stamp, not in the slightest. But, it was enough to make Luke unproductive the entire day, setting up camp at the window sill in Julie’s room. 

Luke knew that he wasn’t supposed to be in Julie’s room, but there was something (Always) pulling him there. And he really needed to be surrounded by her today. He didn’t know why, perhaps it was that same gravity that pulled him towards Julie’s room. He really didn’t care for the why though because it didn’t change whether he went to Julie’s room or not (He knew why, but knowing and admitting are two completely separate things).

“Luke?” Julie’s voice called out to him; snapping him out of whatever ghostly trance he was in. 

Had he been here all day? It didn’t feel like it. No, no he was only there for like 2 hours. But, then why was Julie already home from school?

“Luke, are you ok? That was like the third time I called your name,” Julie explained after dropping her backpack at her door. She made her way next to him at the window sill and it was then that Luke realized that he had been in some sort of catatonic state. His view of choice? the falling rain. 

Most days, he could push that empty feeling in the back of his mind. The one that screams at him and tells him that he is no longer alive. That he doesn’t even have a body, a home, a family, at least one that shares his DNA. The only good thing about being dead is that he has Julie, Alex, and Reggie with him, but sometimes-- sometimes that wasn’t enough. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry, I know I shouldn’t be in here, I’ll head out now,” Luke lied, not really realizing his low, monotone-coated voice. Luke began to make his way towards the door when Julie touched his arm signaling for him to stop. 

“Luke, I can’t let you walk away when I can tell that something is bothering you. You know you can tell me anything, right?” 

If it were anyone else, if it were Alex or Reggie, he simply would have continued to make his way out of the room. They have enough weight on their shoulders, he didn��t want to add to it. And he certainly didn’t want to add that same weight onto Julie, but he couldn't say no to her. Not when she’s looking up at him with those big beautiful brown eyes. Not when she’s touching his arm, her warmth radiating onto his skin. Not when she’s the one that gets him without him needing to say a word. 

But, how could he explain it to her? For one thing, it was a stupid concept to miss. Rain? It’s literally just water that falls from the sky and ruins your day by getting you wet when you weren’t planning it. And for another thing, he was never good at explaining his emotions. It’s why he wrote songs in the first place. For some reason, it was just easier putting them into music because that was all he was after; it didn’t seem as monumental as sharing his feelings out loud. 

But with Julie, he could learn to try. 

So, he pressed his lips together before taking a deep breath in and out, not letting his eyes off of Julie’s (If he did, it would’ve all been over and he would’ve left).

“it’s kinda of...stupid, but I've kinda been missing rain? I know it’s right out in front of me so it’s not like I can’t see it, but I can’t....feel it the way I used to and it’s just...hard,” Luke finishes. He dares to look right at Julie then and he sees her lips part and eyes looking back as if she knew him in a past life. 

Sometimes it felt like that. Like Luke knew Julie in a past life. He doesn't know if it’s because of that night in her kitchen when she passed through his entire body and he could see the light in her soul. Or if it was the connect of electricity that flowed through their veins as they wrote lyrics and melodies at the piano. Or if it was because of moments like these where he could swear that Julie could feel what he was feeling even though he knew that was out of the question because she was alive and he was...

“Luke, that’s not...” Julie trailed off, trying to find the right words to say.

“That’s not stupid at all. Now that we can-touch it makes me forget the reason why we’re called Julie and The Phantoms in the first place. It only makes sense that some days--are like this. Is there anything I can do?” She questioned. 

Luke felt his lips crease into a hint of a smile, the first hint of one, he guessed, all day. Of course she would want to help. Of course. She’s Julie Molina. Words couldn’t really express how much of a pure heart she was. But, even if that was the case, Luke felt that this was one thing that Julie couldn’t fix (She could stay and that would take the pain way a bit, but Luke didn’t think they were at that point in their interesting little relationship yet).

“I-I don’t know. But, Jules?” He questioned softly. She hummed in response.

“Thanks,” Luke acknowledged with a small smile and Julie nodded.

“Of course. I meant it when I said it. You can tell me anything. Now I'm starving so I'm gonna go get a snack you’re welcome to join me in the kitchen, but if you don’t feel up to it, I guess just this once, you can stay in my room,” Julie explained with that smile that Luke swore would put the stars to shame. 

“I’ll stay here. Thanks...” 

Julie nodded before heading out of her room and closing the door behind her leaving Luke to watch the rain fall out of her bedroom window. If it was one thing Luke Patterson knew, it was that Julie Molina was the sun: warm and bright and wonderful. 

But, what Luke Patterson didn’t know was that Julie Molina was forming a plan in her head.

Luke began to notice the plan, however, the next night in the kitchen. It was early in the evening after the Molina’s had finished dinner, which the boys were now invited to as Julie’s dad knew about them now (They’d tell him that they can’t eat, but all three of them had decided it was the least they could do after everything he’s done for them; letting them stay and all). 

Julie had collected everyone’s plates off of the dining room table and brought them into the kitchen to wash, Luke offered to help, but she refused. So, instead, he just kept her company as she rinsed the plates off in the sink. He perched himself on the kitchen counter next to the plates handing them off to her to make the process quicker. 

Just like always, they had slipped into a sort of routine. Julie washed a plat with a dish rag, put it into the dish washer and hand out her hand towards Luke, who already had the plate in her reach. It was seamless, almost like a product line in a factory. That was, until it wasn’t. 

Luke had been reaching for another plate beside him when Julie flicked her dish rag at him with a smug smile. Luke still couldn’t feel the water then. He may be visible to the Molinas (Only sometimes, the boys still haven’t figured that out entirely yet), he may be able to pick things up better, but he still couldn’t feel water. He didn't know what it was about tangibility, maybe it just wasn’t their strong suit. 

What he did know, was that he felt that Julie’s seemingly spontaneous water fight wasn’t really spontaneous at all and that it had something to do with their conversation yesterday afternoon. Even though Luke saw right through it, he still played along, grabbing a dish towel himself and splashing her right back. 

That’s how the kitchen ended up in puddles that night and Julie’s clothes got tighter (Luke felt like the universe was teasing him at that point; showing him things that he couldn’t touch no matter how badly he wanted to). 

It become a sort of reoccurrence; The incident in the kitchen. They started out as subtle little things. Splashing him when they sat at a fountain when they were out one day. Flipping her wet hair at him after she came down from showering (which man, did he think he was daydreaming at first).

After those methods didn’t seem to work, though, Julie went bigger. Spraying him with the garden hose, brining out water guns. She tried everything yet nothing she did seemed to work. Luke debated telling her that she should just give up on him; it was never gonna happen. 

But then, it did. 

Luke had been walking out of the studio after finishing the final touches on a guitar solo for a new Julie and The Phantoms song when something passed through him, making him stop in his tracks. 

He swiftly turned around to try and find the object that had passed, but nothing was remnant of the feeling. Because he didn’t see anything alarming, Luke began to make his way towards the house, but the feeling of something passing through him happened again; no objects in sight. 

“What the hell is going on?!” Luke shouted. Well, he got is answer alright. Suddenly, Julie had appeared behind one of the bushes in the garden, water balloon in hand. 

“Get him!” She commanded as if it were a battle cry. Luke thought then, that maybe it was, because immediately after she had called, Flynn, Carlos, Alex, and Reggie all appeared from different hiding places in the garden as they began throwing their ammo. 

Instinctively, Luke threw his hands up in front of him, his leg pulling up in front of his chest too, to shield him from the balloons that inevitably just passed right through him. In that moment of time, everyone forgot, even Luke. 

Because the three boys didn’t get wet, it was Julie, Carlos and Flynn who had suffered the consequences, playful yelps sounding from each of them as they were hit. And Luke wasn’t preoccupied enough not to notice. So, he came up with his own game plan--making a run for it towards Julie and stealing her ammo. 

In this case, it was an advantage that he wasn’t able to get wet as he ran across the battlefield. Julie had been distracted by Flynn, who had made Julie her new target, which gave Luke the leeway he needed to sneak up behind her and grab a water balloon from the bucket next to her. 

He didn’t miss a beat when he catapulted the balloon at her back. She threw her arms up in shock and turned around to face the culprit; drops of water making her face glitter in the sun. 

“Oh, you’re gonna get it!” She yelled at him. Luke held up his hands in defense and widened his eyes dramatically.

“Oh, I’m scared!” He mocked, which was a big mistake because Julie charged towards him after that.

“You should be! Get back here!” She laughed. Luke didn’t take her order, continuing to run laps around the backyard. 

“oh I don’t think so! You’ll have to catch me first!” Luke yelled back at her. Julie continued to laugh as she chased after him, Luke joining in too. Neither of them sure how much time had actually passed, Julie finally caught up to Luke and tackled him to the ground.

“Gotcha!” Julie smiled brightly above Luke. Luke realized then how close he was to Julie. Luke’s back had pressed against a tree from Julie’s force while Julie found herself practically straddling Luke, his hands mindlessly placed on her wast, their faces hovering inches apart. 

And it was in that moment that Luke had realized something important. He may not be able to feel rain like he used to, but he could feel Julie. He could feel her breath warming his cold skin. Her hands resting on his shoulders. Her legs against his. 

He could feel his lips against hers as both of them had began to gravitate towards each other just like they always seem to do. 

And as he was kissing her, their bodies moving in sync, his cold breath mixing with her warm, he realized that it had happened. 

Luke pulled away from Julie’s lips, his own hurting because of how big he was smiling, and brushed a strand of her hair out of her face as he leaned in and whispered

“You’re my new rain.”

tagging: @moony221b @littledancersun @willexx @blush-and-books @lydias--stiles

[allthingsfangirl101]

Body-Shaming Part 1–Zac Efron

Part 2*

TW: cyber-bullying, body image

I stared at the picture for too long. Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I saw what they were talking about. I wasn't sure how I didn't see them before.

There were a lot of insecurities I didn't know I had until Zac and I made our relationship public. For the first three months, we kept it a secret, but at The Greatest Showman premiere, we decided to go together. This led to people asking questions, so we finally told everyone the truth.

At first, people were nice about it. They loved seeing Zac happy. But eventually, they turned on me. They started saying that I wasn't pretty enough, smart enough, or good enough for him.

Today's attack was on a picture Zac posted of him and me at the beach yesterday. I was wearing a bikini and Zac had thrown me over his shoulder. Dylan took the picture right before Zac dove into the freezing water.

                             ~•~

Damn, he must be strong if he can hold her like that.💪🏻🤣

Gross! Can we edit her out?

I'd rather see him shirtless than her in a bikini.

Look at her stretch marks!!🤢🤢🤢

She looks like a fucking zebra! 🦓

Zebras are cute. She's just disgusting.

How does he like looking at her all day?🤮

She's so fucking fat!

He could do so much better. He should do so much better!

Why is he with her?

Seriously though, what the hell is he doing with that?

                            ~•~

I quickly closed the app and wiped away the tears when I heard the front door open and close.

"Babe?" I heard Zac call out. "I'm home!"

"I'm in here," I said after quickly turning on Netflix. He leaned over the couch and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, kissing my cheek.

"Trying to find a movie for us to watch after dinner?" He teased as he continued to kiss my neck.

"Yep," I stuttered. "No luck though."

"Whatever you pick, we won't pay any attention to it," he smirked against my skin.

"What makes you say that?" I tried to play along. Zac bit down on my sweet spot, but when I didn't react the way I usually do, he pulled away.

"What's wrong, babe?"

When I didn't respond, he jumped over the couch and sat next to me. I was playing with the sleeves of Zac's sweatshirt I stole as he studied me.

"Talk to me," he whispered as he reached over and turned my head towards him.

"It's nothing," I stuttered. "I've just been battling a migraine all day."

"I'm sorry, baby," Zac sighed.

He reached up and ran his fingers through my hair. I'm not sure if he believed me, but he acted like he did. He pulled me into his chest and continued to run his fingers through my hair as he held me close.

We were halfway through the third episode of The Good Place when Zac broke our silence.

"What's really going on, babe?" He whispered, tightening his arms around me.

"Nothing," I started to say.

"It wouldn't be those comments on the picture of us I posted the other day, would it?"

I looked up at him with wide eyes. "How did you. . ."

"Baby," he chuckled, sitting us up. "They were stupid enough to comment those terrible things about you on my post. It's like they forgot that I would see them."

He stopped laughing when he saw the look on my face. He instantly turned towards me, grabbing my hands in his.

"Y/N, look at me," his voice sounding slightly desperate. "I don't care what any of my fans say. I love you, baby, and I think you are beautiful. I hope you haven't been beating yourself up too much about all this."

"I haven't," I lied. I sighed when I saw the look on his face. "It's just. . . Those comments. . . I tried not to let them get to me, babe. Really but. . ."

Zac cut me off by leaning over and pressing his lips to mine. I sighed as I slowly started to kiss him back. When he broke the kiss, he leaned his forehead against mine and whispered to me.

"I love you, Y/N. Those comments are just jealous typings of fans. They aren't true and I hope you know I don't even read them."

"You don't?" I stuttered.

"Of course not, baby," he chuckled as he tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. "All I focus on is posting a picture of the woman I love."

I leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. When I broke the kiss, I leaned my forehead against his and whispered, "I love you too, baby."

                       * * * * *

Even though I told Zac that I would stop reading the comments and let them go, I couldn't. I put a smile on my face each morning, but it went away as soon as Zac went to work. And it didn't come back until he walked back through the door.

My depression episode got really bad the longer I hid it from Zac. I stopped doing my hair and makeup. I barely ate, only really eating whenever Zac was around. I started wearing leggings and baggy sweatshirts that I often stole from Zac. Since they were his, he didn't think anything of it.

I was binge-watching a show I've seen a million times, falling asleep on the couch two weeks after the comments were posted on the picture when Zac walked in and finally said something.

"Hi, baby," he said slowly. I looked over, quickly sitting up.

"Hi, babe."

Zac sighed as he tossed his bag on the chair and walked over to me. "Y/N, I can't take this anymore."

"Take what?" I stuttered as he sat on the coffee table in front of me.

"I know you are still thinking about those stupid comments from two weeks ago," he sighed, reaching over and taking my hands. "I thought we talked about this, Y/N."

"I know we've talked about me forgetting what they said, but I can't stop," I finally let out as I pulled my hands out of his.

I started rambling all the thoughts I've been keeping inside as I stood up and started nervously pacing in front of Zac.

"I can't stop thinking about their comments and the truth behind them. I'm not skinny, Zac. I'm not an actress or a model. I'm not famous. I'm not smart. I'm not beautiful. I'm not. . . I'm not good enough for you, Zac. I'm not! I should go. That's what I should do. You should break up with me and date one of your costars or a famous model. Okay? Bye."

I quickly headed towards the front door, but Zac grabbed my wrist, spun me around, and pulled me into his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around me as I sobbed into his chest.

"I'm not good enough for you," I said softly through my sobs. "I should. . . I should go. . ."

"You are not going anywhere," he whispered. "And I'm not breaking up with you."

"But," I stuttered through my sobs.

"Nope," he chuckled, tightening his arms around me. "I don't care what my fans say. I love you, Y/N. You are the most important person in my life and I am not letting anyone come between us."

I leaned my forehead against his chest as he rubbed my back with one hand and ran his other hand through my hair. I knew he was telling the truth because his heart rate was surprisingly calm. I smiled as he subconsciously started swaying us back and forth.

"I have an idea," he whispered. He leaned out of the hug and smiled down at me. "I want you to put on your favorite dress, the one that makes you feel beautiful. I want you to put on whatever makeup to help you feel confident. And I want you to do your hair in your favorite style."

"Why?" I asked, my voice barely audible. Zac reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, his hand lingering.

"Because you and I are going on a date," he chuckled. "We are going to get all dressed up and we are going to your favorite restaurant."

"Osteria Mozza?" I asked, slightly hopeful. I bit my lip when he nodded. "Really? I thought. . . I thought that place has like, no open tables. You need to call a month, at least, in advance. How. . ."

"Well," he playfully smirked down at me. "Let's just say that the cook is an old friend of mine. All I have to do is call and he'll hook us up."

I bit my lip, debating. I looked down at our feet, the comments popping back into my head.

"Hey," he said gently. He lifted my chin, making me look up at him. "Forget about them. It's you and me, babe. Always."

                       * * * * *

After putting on my favorite dress, curling my hair, and putting on make-up, I stared at myself in the mirror. I smoothed out my dress, not feeling as confident as Zac was hoping.

"Y/N?" Zac called out. "You almost ready, babe?"

"Coming," I said, clearing my throat.

I threw my phone and chapstick into my clutch and fixed my shoes. I walked down the hallway, nervously chewing on my bottom lip. I was staring at my feet as I walked into the other room.

"Wow," Zac chuckled. I looked up, a blush forming when I saw him standing in his suit. "You look beautiful, Y/N. Absolutely stunning."

He walked over to me, wrapped his arms around me, and pressed his lips to mine. I smiled as I reached up and gently wrapped my arms around his neck. Our lips moved in sync as Zac pulled me closer to his chest.

"We're going to miss our reservation," I mumbled against his lips. He broke the kiss with a small chuckle.

"You're right," he smiled.

He grabbed my hand and looped my arm through his. I blushed as he escorted me out of our apartment and down the hall to the elevator. He continued to hold my arm like that until we got to his car.

He jokingly bowed as he opened my door for me. I kissed his cheek before getting into his car. The entire way to the restaurant, I was subconsciously playing with the skirt of my dress.

About halfway there, Zac reached over and grabbed my hand, intertwining our fingers. I held his hand the rest of the way to the restaurant. When we arrived, the valet immediately ran over to Zac's side.

He jumped out and quickly ran to my side. I laughed when I heard Zac tell the valet that he would get my door. I smiled as he opened it and grabbed my hand, helping me out of the car. The second we were both out of the car, we saw a flash.

I looked over my shoulder to see a group of paparazzi watching us. Zac snaked his arm around my waist, pulling me into his side. He leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to my cheek.

"Ignore them," he whispered. "Just you and me, babe."

Without moving his arm from around my waist, Zac led me into the restaurant. We sat at a table in the back and talked all night. For what felt like the first time since people found out about us, I actually felt comfortable.

Throughout the entire dinner, Zac never looked anywhere but at me. The way he was staring at me gave me first-date butterflies all over again.

I smiled as Zac helped me with my coat. He turned me around and pressed his lips to mine. We ignored the cameras flashing outside as our lips moved in sync.

"See?" Zac whispered when he broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against mine. "They love us."

"They love you," I corrected teasingly as I fixed his tie. He sent me a look before grabbing my chin and pressing his lips back to mine.

"I love you," he whispered. "And nothing will change that, Y/N."

"I love you too, baby."

As we headed outside, my heart sank when we passed a girl and she whispered, "He could do so much better."

Part 2*

[princess-of-the-corner]

Winx Club Reboot: How would the first 2 episodes go? I know that you mentioned some of it before but I mean something more complete instead of bits.

Okay here we go!

Since I decided to bump them up to college age because that makes more sense to me, it starts with a 'going away to college' party. Bloom's Earth Friends have all been accepted to their dream schools, and are leaving the next day. Bloom laments on how she doesn't know what to do yet, despite getting acceptance letters, and decides to take a year off to help her mom in the flower shop and think about what she wants to do with her life.

Like in Canon, on the way home she runs into Stella being attacked by Ghouls. Side note: I am kinda dropping Knut from being the Trix's lackey. I like him enough, but he's a little redundant so I'm just jumping to having him already as Alfea's janitor/handyman.

Anyway! Bloom can't just sit back and watch, so she jumps into the fight. Mostly using a tree branch, but also managing to tap into some Magic.

Afterward, Stella doesn't faint but starts talking casually to Bloom asking things like 'Where are you from?" and 'Are you going to Alfea or Cloud Tower?'. Bloom confesses that she has no clue what Stella's talking about.

We get exposition on other worlds with Magic. And how Earth doesn't have Magic. The only Magic people here would be tourists like Stella. So for Bloom to have been living here... it's weird.

Bloom takes Stella back home, and they explain the whole 'Magic is real and Bloom has powers' thing to her parents. Her parents believe it a little quicker in this version, but they keep giving one another A Look™.

Stella tells them that they can kill two birds with one stone. Bloom needs some kind of training with her Magic, so going to Alfea(or Cloud Tower) is a good idea. And there are people there who might know what's going on.

Instead of Canon's Troll Fight, Stella takes them all to Alfea, Yes all of them because that 'barrier that keeps non-Magic people out' is so stupid in a world where literally everyone is Magic.

As I was saying, she takes them to Faragonda's office and explains 'hey I was on Earth and found this girl with Magic. Don't know what to make of that so help???',

Faragonda is very curious. A Magixae on Earth? How could this have happened. Especially as she can feel that Bloom is quite powerful.

She asks if Bloom is adopted, and Bloom's like 'yeah but why does that matter?'. Stella catches on and guesses 'Oh. So maybe when you were a baby your parents were from somewhere else and took a vacation to Earth. They died somehow, and the local Authorities thought you were a normal Earth baby and put you in their system!".

It makes sense.... except why is this the first time Bloom has used Magic? She should've just instinctively done things like any Magixae, but she never exhibited powers until today.

Her parents give each other that look again, which makes everyone go 'okay you two clearly know something so spill!".

Mike confesses that while they told Bloom she was adopted, they didn't tell her the whole story and let her think they just got her from the system the normal way. Here, he confesses to how he found her in a burning building, completely unbothered by the flames. He always thought he was going crazy but now...

Faragonda is even more curious about this now. This wasn't an accident. Bloom was hidden on Earth. Put somewhere she would be found by decent people, with her powers Sealed until something Magic(Stella) ran across her. Who did this and why? Was it a good reason or something nefarious?

Faragonda makes a deal. Bloom can come to Alfea and learn to use her Magic and hopefully find her origins. All she has to do is keep her grades up, and update Faragonda on what she learns.

Episode 2:

Bloom moves into the dorm rooms and meets Tecna, Musa and Flora. God those names kill me.

After some dodging of questions, eventually Bloom talks about the 'yeah I'm from Earth and didn't know Magic existed until like. Yesterday.'. Which throws them all for a loop.

Tecna comments on trying to guess where Bloom's from through her attributes, but Bloom's Domino traits are still under a Glamour for now so she doesn't get anything conclusive.

The girls decide to give Bloom a tour of the surrounding area, some exposition to the Audience, and help her out. Like, one fun thing is that there are so many unfamiliar foods! And fashions too!

Bloom gets separated at some point and accidentally hears the Trix talking about Stella. She's a little sus because they sound like they're mean and planning something so she follows them.

They end up in a fight. Well. Bloom can't transform and the Trix are third years at Cloud Tower so they absolutely demolish her until the rest of the Winx show up and help out. They're still out-powered but they managed to get away because the Trix ain't gonna commit several murders downtown right now.

There's some discussion from the girls on how Bloom is.... very behind when it comes to Magic. She's baby your honor! But yeah literally she has no experience or knowledge of how a lot of things should work. So they start discussing plans to help her catch up so she isn't falling behind too much once classes start.

And that's the first two episodes basically!

[liam-93-productions]

Note: This article is paid content on Billboard, but due to its relevance in promoting Liam’s work with The LP Shows we decided to share it. 

Liam Payne and his manager Steve Finan O’Connor from Kin Partners knew they needed to stay connected with fans when COVID-19 shut down the touring business, but how? There were dozens of different paths to follow with social media tools, video-conferencing technologies and paid streaming platforms available, but it was all uncharted territory. After surveying his options the former One Direction singer and his manager settled on an unconventional, but ultimately successful strategy. 

“We just decided to give it all a go and see where it led us”, jokes Finan O’Connor. Payne built his strategy around Twitter, YouTube and Instagram - where he has more than 100 million combined followers - but he has also turned to video-conferencing platform Zoom at the beginning of the pandemic to host small online get togethers with fans who contributed to his preferred charities. 

At the recommendation of business manager Alan McEvoy, Payne selected Veeps, the streaming platform launched by brothers Benji Madden and Joel Madden from the multi-platinum punk and rock group Good Charlotte. 

Benji tells Billboard he had seen artists on the platform use social media to drive traffic to their shows, but had never seen a team experiment with different platforms in real time and so quickly hone in on converting fans into online ticket  buyers. For Payne, this meant identifying his most committed fans on platforms like YouTube and Instagram Live and then using tech like Twitter and Zoom to create pathways into the ticket buying queue and eventually into the show. 

“They’re doing fan engagement that I just haven’t seen anyone do”, Benji says. “They really listened to the fans and watched what people reacted to. Liam is not just showing up and doing the live show. He’s spending weeks talking to fans, building out his own livestream world and tapping into all the modern ways that we see people communicate and interact and put content into the world”.

Yesterday Payne announced his third live stream event on Veeps, a Halloween party and show with tickets strating at $10. Finan O’Connor said much of the work Payne did building his online audience during the pandemic has focused on maximizing human connection while finding ways to deliver meaningful and direct experiences. Betweens his first and second show, Payne quadrupled the number of tickets sold and broke the record for most tickets sold to a single show on Veeps platform. Below, Finan O’Connor talks about what he and Payne learned as they developed their pandemic strategy in real time. 

Help Fans Find You in Unexpected Locations

"Social media is like an onion -- there's millions of people on the outside layers and you've got to peel away those layers before you have something you can cook," explains Finan O'Connor. That meant focusing resources on finding, engaging and communicating with individuals willing to spend a few hours with the U.K. singer "without bothering the other people who don't really want to hear you right now."

Early on, they noticed that thousands of fans were queueing up early for Payne's Roundup Show on YouTube, where he checks in with fans and talks about the different projects he is working on.

"There were 60,000 to 70,000 people sitting in a waiting room for half an hour before we premiered an episode, just between themselves talking about Liam, One Direction or whatever else," Finan O'Connor says. "So Liam went and sat the queue with them and started talking with his fans and answering their questions."

Fans started getting excited to have Payne in the queue but, others wanted proof it was really Payne and not a member of his team. So the "Midnight" singer hopped on Instagram Live and began streaming himself answering fan questions on YouTube.

"He was able to talk directly to people in the moment that actually really wanted to be part of it," Finan O'Connor says, growing his numbers both on YouTube and Instagram. To build off the momentum,  Payne now starts an Instagram Live stream prior to shows, telling his audience there ("160,000 to 200,000 fans," says Finan O'Connor) that the concert is about to begin in Veeps, then turns off that Instagram feed and starts the show, first with support acts and then his main performance.

"When we finish, we go backstage and we don't stop the show -- we carry it on for at least an hour [on Veeps]," Finan O'Connor says. "He'll chat with fans and do contests through Twitter to receive free tickets for the next show. Fans will vote for their favorite fans and Liam will announce the winner live on Veeps."

Include the Crowd in the Show

Performing in an empty room while fans watch at home can be a challenge for artists used to feeding off their fans' energy, but after watching a soccer game with cheering artificially added to the game, Finan O'Connor had an idea: add in sound recorded from previous live shows to make Payne's concerts on Veeps feel more realistic.

"They're shouting his name and five to 10 minutes in, you forget that these noises are not happening in real time," Finan O'Connor says. To mimic fans being brought on stage during a concert. Liam would feature people who had been filmed prior to the concert talking about how the pandemic was affecting their lives.

"Fans would say, 'We're struggling. We love this. You're giving us more and going out of your way,' and that's when it really hit Liam -- hit him big time -- because he able to give fans something they really needed," Finan O'Connor says.

Knowing many fans were struggling financially, Payne also sold tickets on a "pay what you want" basis, starting at $10, with a portion of ticket sales going towards the Trussell Trust Charity, which fights poverty and hunger issues in the U.K.

"It was important for him to make the shows about something bigger," Finan O'Connor says. "He wanted fans to feel like we were all in this together."

Build Momentum

When Payne first started thinking about how to approach the online concert series, he met with Benji Madden to get some ideas and inspiration for what had worked for other artists, like Brandi Carlile and LP, on the Veeps platform.

"Benji told him that he wouldn’t be doing just one show. It would be regular shows, building a deeper connection with his fan base in the same way an artist does when they tour in the early stages of their career," Finan O'Connor recalls. "Unlike a live tour where you repeat the same show in each city, his tour has a brand new show each time. Benji was right. The fans have loved the interaction."

Because Payne has fans all over the world, he's also tried to accommodate different time zones. But since it can take weeks and sometimes months to plan a show, Finan O'Connor came up with an easy work-around -- watch rebroadcasts of his shows live with his fans. "We watched along with the crowd, kind of like a director's cut, and he discussed how the songs were written and being played and he was laughing and having a good time," he says. "We went on for an hour and 45 minutes and it was almost like a radio show."

The strategy helped quadruple ticket sales from the first performance called LP Act 1 on July 17 to his LP Act 2 show on Aug. 29. During the rebroadcasts Payne would be "watching the comments and memes videos on Twitter, stop the show, press pause, and showing what someone says there or what someone posts here," he says. "When you're playing a concert, you can't just stop in the middle of the show and chat with people, but with the rebroadcasts, we can stop and bring in two fans via Zoom and ask question and interact and make the fans feel like they're really engaged in the concert. It's just taking the power of live-streaming into an entirely different dimension."

[just-my-fandom]

One After Another (Cisco Ramon x Allen! Reader)

Chapter 3

Summary; Cisco questions quitting the team after Reader was attacked. Reader has nightmares of the attack.

Takes place in Season 5 Episode 5 and 6

Warning(s); Mentions of miscarriages. Nightmares.

Tag list; @thebloodrobin @badasspolygenderfriend

Story list; Chapter 1 , Chapter 2

. . .

When you wake up, the apartment is eerily quiet. Usually it wouldn’t be a problem for you- but now that you have an infant- it startles you to climb out of bed and rush to the nursery across the hall.

When you find that Dante’s crib in empty, you feel your chest tighten, looking over your shoulder as you move back to the hallway, and to the kitchen, “Cisco?!”

“Morning!” Cisco greets you almost instantly with a kiss to your temple, your eyes moving around him to see Dante holding younger him, bouncing in small circles so young Dante giggled and grabbed for his shirt,

“Why didn’t you tell me he was up?” You breathe, hand at your chest, “I almost had a heart attack,”

“Easy, mami,” Cisco soothes, handing you a glass of (favorite/drink), “He got up early, and I figured you were still exhausted from yesterday so Dante and I already got him up for you,”

“Thanks,” You murmur, Cisco humming as he kisses your lips, turning to Dante now looking at his phone,

“It’s Sherloque,” Dante rolls his eyes, almost instantly so does Cisco, “We’re needed at the labs,”

“Are you gonna be okay here without me?” Cisco asks, and you smile, taking the infant from Dante with a nod,

“Gotta get used to being with him alone anyways,” You remind, “Stay safe, and Caitlins been having some struggles with her dad. Help her?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Cisco nods, pecking your lips before moving to the door, Dante waving over his shoulder before youre left in silence again,

“Okay,” You heave, looking down at the babbling boy, “What to do...”

. . .

“Well, well, well. Liquid nitrogen,”

Cisco shines his flashlight towards Sherloques voice, stepping up next to him to the giant container, “That’s a potent accelerant, is it not? Oh this place it would have gone up,”

“So all my fathers work is completely gone?”

“Well, not necessarily,” Ralph speaks, “I mean, think about it. Police listed this fire as accidental, but they didn’t know about the connect to your father, so,”

“Ralph, my father told me to come find him,”

“I know that, but a guy who disappears on the night of a warehouse fire and who’s hard to find?”

Ralph pauses when finding a box, lifting it and setting it on the table. Within seconds, Sherloque scoffs in addition to Ralph starting an argument on Caitlins mother,

“Alright!” Cisco shouts, pushing past Ralph to grab the lid of the box, “Give me this!”

The three are forced to watch as their friends nose begins to bleed, body collapsing almost instantly so Caitlin gasped, rushing for her friend on the floor of the factory, “Cisco?”

. . .

“While you were unconscious, I scanned your wounds. There are still trace amounts of aluminum beryllium alloy fused within your hands,” Caitlin turns to Cisco on the med bed next to her, her friend running a hand down his face with a large sigh,

“See, this is- this is what I need,” Cisco laughs, irritably, “I just need rest,”

“No, Cisco, rest is not going to fix this, okay? Every time you vibe or breach, the dark matter is going to affect your central nervous system, causing you more and more pain, every time you cube, you are going to experience more and more seizures,”

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Cisco asks, loudly, sitting up so he could stare at Caitlins startled expression. He sighs and rests his head in his hands, fingers knotting into his dark locks,

“Y/N woke up from a nightmare last night,” He starts, voice quiet as he lifts his head and looks at his hands, “Of when Cicada attacked her at home yesterday, of her going into labor early. She was scared, Caitlin, because I wasn’t there and she was focused on whether or not I’d make it to see our son,”

“But she made it through it, because she’s strong,” Caitlin reassures, Cisco swallowing and shaking his head,

“But what if I hadn’t had made it?” Cisco asks, now looking up his best friend, “What if Y/N had Dante, and learned that I didn’t make it? It would have crushed her, Cait, you know that,”

“I do know that,” Caitlin nods, hand on Cisco’s knee, “When you and her were thinking of baby names, she chose the name Dante for your brother. When future Dante came, she didn’t complain of the fact that Dante looks exactly like you. When she found out Dante has her powers, she secretly wished he was a breacher like you. Because she wanted Dante to grow up to be the man you are today,”

“Y/Ns terrified of her not regaining her powers,” Cisco murmurs, curling his fingers, “She depends on her powers just as much as we all do, Nora said she’d gain them back, but, with the timeline changing and Dante being here a month early-,”

“Like you told her yesterday,” Caitlin reminds, “Her body is still healing from child birth. Both you and her need to trust the process of time,”

Cisco nods, biting his lip to calm his nerves.

. . .

When you wake up again, it’s at two in the morning and in desperate need for air. You find yourself sitting up, only sparing your sleeping husband a glance before you climb out of bed, edging towards the nursery for the third time that night.

Your footsteps are light as they move from hardwood to carpet, your hand tucking hair behind your ear as you lean over the crib, eyes staring at the bundled infant silently in slumber,

A moments pause before a hand touches your arm, a startled yelp escaping your lips so another hand covered your mouth, your eyes flicking up to Cisco’s face shining from the windows moonlighting,

Your brows furrow as you hit his chest, glancing back over to the infant in fear he had awoken, but Cisco is quietly leading you out into the hallway, his own brows pinched with worry,

“Why did you scare me?” You hiss in a whisper, hitting his chest again but then resting your hand in that spot, fingers clutching at his shirt,

“What’re you doing up again?” He whispers back, watching your held tilt towards the nursery, before his hand slides up to your jaw, guiding your eyes back to his in the dark, “Hey,” He murmurs, second hand mirroring the first on your face, “What’s going through your head?”

You clench your jaw and let your eyes flutter shut, opening them so you met Cisco’s eyes, “I had the nightmare again,” You swallow, “But this one was different,”

“How?” Cisco questions,

“I-,” You shrug, blinking so Cisco felt a tear touch his thumb, where he rubs the skin, soothingly, “In this nightmare Dante didn’t survive, him coming early caused complications,”

You sniffle, Cisco shushing you as he pulls you to his front, hand sliding to clutch at your hair,

“Hey,” Cisco whispers, your eyes shutting as you tuck your head under his chin, “We’re okay, baby. All of us,”

“But you almost weren’t,” You remind, Cisco’s eyes shutting as he exhales, “I could have lost either one of you,”

“But you didn’t,” Cisco reminds back, tilting his head down so you looked up, “You’ve got us,”

“Promise?” You plea, Cisco smiling with a nod, his lips pressing against yours, hand at your hip, tightly,

“I promise,” He murmurs, letting you lean back into him before he kisses your head, guiding you to the bedroom footsteps away.

When you wake up the fourth time, you decide sleep wasn’t your friend and settled in the living room, tea in one hand and phone in the other. Four AM. Dante would be waking up soon. Cisco eventually, too.

Your mind drifts back to the nightmares. All four times, all four nightmares were different. Cicada attacking. Early labor. Dante not surviving. Cisco not surviving.

Lucid dreams weren’t common during your pregnancy. You wondered if it was an after effect of pregnancy for you, or if Cicada attacking really took a toll on you.

You hear Cisco before you see him, his figure soon sinks down onto the couch beside you, and in silent motions, he allows you to set down your mug and press yourself against him, his arms tight around your shoulders,

“Do you wanna talk about it?” His whisper is almost ghost like, one leg spread across the couch as the other hung off the side, your body settled between and against his chest,

A small exhale, and you let your ear rest on his chest, “You didn’t make it,”

Cisco’s hand slides up your back and caresses the back of your head, in silence pressing short, slow kisses to your temple and ear,

“You know I’m not leaving, babe,”

“I know,” You murmur, nodding, “I just don’t know why I keep having these nightmares,”

“We can ask Caitlin,” Cisco hums, “See if it’s really an after effect,”

You nod a second time, allowing your body to relax as your eyes flutter shut, breaths evening out. Dante’s short cry causes you to jump, head shooting up to look over the couch, where Cisco sits up, hands on your hips,

“I got him, don’t worry,” He soothes, and you move to sit back in your previous spot, “Finish your tea,”

Your eyes watch as he disappears around the corner, sighing into your cup as you take a needed sip of the warm beverage.

. . .

“Cisco?” Said male looks up at Caitlins call, her and Barry staring at him in concern, “You okay, bud?”

Cisco’s hand runs down his face, elbow propped on his chair in thought, “What if I took a break?” At Caitlins head tilt, he exhales, “From the team?”

“Cisco Ramon,” Your appearance behind him causes him to turn around, sharply. Dante was not with you- Joe and Cecile had suggested a play date day for him and Jenna, “I’m not letting you do that,”

“Y/N,” Cisco sighs, and you shake your head, moving to stand next to Caitlin in front of him,

“No. Cisco, aside from Dante and I, this team is the most important thing to you. I’m not going to let you walk away from it because of my problems,” You hold a finger, “And I know that’s why you’re thinking this,”

“I just don’t want to be the cause of your nightmares,” Cisco states, and you close your eyes, looking down,

“Cisco, whether you’re on the team or not, I’m always going to worry about you, and them,” You nod to Barry and Caitlin, “The past four years, Barry was the pinpoint of my worry. Scared he would end up like our parents. Dante was born, he’s now the center of my worry. I’m always going to be worried- now with metas in Central City, how can I not be?”

You shake your head, “The point is, I’m not letting you leave this team. No questions asked,”

Barry smiles when Cisco leans his head against his chair and looks up at you, patting Caitlins shoulder so she nodded for him to follow her to her lab,

Cisco pushes up from his chair and rounds the control panel, arms wrapping around you, tightly, “I love you. You know that, right?”

“Always,” You smile and look up at him, Cisco cupping your face with a light laugh,

“Let’s catch Cicadas ass,”

[majorxmaggiexboy]

idk if i’m actually going to attempt to participate but i still want to make a little list of Tober/Tember prompts and ideas of what to do with them. also tagging @f-ro-g bc New Pack. Every time i do one of these i start forgetting every media i’ve ever consumed so we’re going to see if i can at least get more than like three different fandoms on here. Might or might not come back through and flesh these out with actual details later on.

Whumptober Ideas

1) All Trussed Up and Nowhere to Go/”You have to let go”/Barbed Wire/Bound - Hadestown, full stop. The whole prompt is Hadestown. It’s in the lyrics, even. It is this post that makes me finally notice the “Keep on walking and don’t look back” line in Wait For Me and i’m so angry right now

2) Talking is Overrated/Garotte/Choking/Gagged - I’m thinking a rewrite of my first Three Musketeers fic just because it was funny the first time around and also wouldn’t take much Effort. Next.

3) Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, But.../Taunting/Insults/”Who did this to you?”

The Bradmadge Brawl of S2E1 but with passion and malice next question

4) Trust Fall/”Do you trust me?”/Taken Hostage/Pushed

Nothing springs immediately to mind but i’m leaning toward Psych or The New Pack

5) Red In My Ledger/Betrayal/Misunderstanding/Broken Nose

*slams hand on table* New Pack. Mordaunt. It writes itself.

6) Touch and Go/Bruises/Touch-Starved/Hunger

On-Drakon we’re going to give Arman and Mira some love even if only two people on this website even know them.

7) My Spidey-Sense is Tingling/Helplessness/Numbness/Blindness

TASM just for the sake of it? Undecided

8) Coughing Up a Lung/Pneumothorax/Exotic Illness/”Definitely Just a Cold”

Ben Tallmadge and the Delaware Dive next question

9) Rumors of My Death Have Been Greatly Exaggerated/Presumed Dead/Blind Rage/Tears

Bucky it’s your turn babe

10) Oops, I Did It Again/Hospital/Flare-Up/Ice Chips

Ben you’re going back in the Delaware it’ll be so funny

11) Just Keep Swimming/Adrift/Drowning/Dehydration

Personally i think having a third Ben vs. Water fic would be the funniest possible move but Grimaud or Mordaunt could also work here

12) It’ll Be Fun, They Said/Torture/Made to Watch/Begging

Jean-Olivier comes to mind but hmmmmm there was also that one TURN S3 au that could work

13) That’s Gonna  Leave a Mark/This Is Gonna Suck/Burns/Cauterization

Hmmmmmm OH! OH! Raoul! The New Pack. Done.

14) Under Pressure/Crush Injuries/Beaten/Force

It says Force and Force is Star Wars so naturally this is Mando’s number.

15) Feed a Cold, Starve a Fever/Delirium/Fever Dream/Bees

Ben Tallmadge guess what....

16) On a Need-to-Know Basis/Recovery/Scars/Aftermath

I’m thinking the Psych Not-Ghost AU would work here but there are certainly other options.

17) Field-Care 101/”Please don’t move!”/Hemorrhage/Dread

Might go with something Leverage right here just because i just watched Leverage. Nothing’s jumping immediately to mind. Warm Bodies could also work though.

18) The Doctor is In/”Now smile for the camera!”/Doctor’s visit/CPR

I’m thinking Reid just because Dr. and i’ve never been able to write Doctor Who so. What other Doctor characters are there. McStuffins isn’t in the running here. Oh! We could do something MCU, Bruce is a Doctor isn’t he? God can you imagine Dr. Hulk trying to

19) Just a Scratch/Bitten/Bleeding/Stabbing

Didn’t ... d’Artagnan once utter the phrase “it’s just a scratch” in relation to someth.....first episode, i think? Great so we have a winner, good job everybody.

20) Lost & Found/Trunk/Trapped underwater/Solitary Confinement

Weirdly Mando is the first character to come to mind. Someone beat me to 80% of my other idea but there’s potential.

21) That’s Where the Blood’s Supposed to Be/Bleeding Through Bandages/Pressure/Blood-Matted Hair

Let’s be real the only two options for this one are Bucky or Eliot and they’re virtually the same character so where does that leave me

22) They Made Me Do It/Cursed/Demon/Obsession

*vague wave* Merlin ?

23) You Break It, You Buy It/Auction/Ransom/Pursuit

That one 3M au with Athos and the big mix-up and the Oops and all the...stuff, yeah. That works.

24) One Down, Two to Go/Self-Induced Injuries to Escape/Flashback/Revenge

Holy sh- i didn’t see this one initially. I mean? Jean? Ow.

25) Hide & Seek/Escape/Flight/Hiding

Psych? Orrrrr....TGM?

26) You Will Go Down With This Ship/Fallen/Waterfall/Trap Door

I’m trying to think of literally anything i’ve ever read or watched that’s got a ship in it ummmmmmm hey what if we interpret “ship” as yeaaaah let’s do another Mando one that’ll work

27) “I’m Fine, I Prom...”/Passing Out/Vertigo/Collapse

I mean..... .... ... is there a character this doesn’t work for though? Wait. No actually let’s do Childermass since he gets that what is it an allergic reaction to magic? I mean i know Segundus gets like that to so....ha let’s make it be Both of them.

28) It’s Not Just In Your Head/”Good, you’re finally awake”/Nightmares/Panic

First thought is New Pack but it might take some pondering.

29) All Work and No Play/”You’re still not dead?”/Too weak to move/overworked

it’s like Civil War but with Bucky and Jean-Olivier having an all-out brawl good lord it’s an either/or situation.

30) Digging Your Grave/Major Character Death/Left For Dead/Ghosts

*shot of choc milk* the exact TURN AU i was Just thinking about yesterday,,,

31) Hurt & Comfort/Disaster Zone/Trauma/Prisoner

I feel like i need to put Gwynplaine here just because he hasn’t had a turn yet

Alt. Prompts

1) Losing Control

Arman. Very obviously extramuch Arman definitely. Let’s have another one with the involuntary dragon himbo.

2) Threats

*chin hands* trying to think of a character who gets threatened a lot. will circle back. I’m actually thinking Psych again but idk.

3) Caning

Ro we’ve genuinely discussed about 16 different variations on this one i think it’s Time

4) Mercy

MORDAUNT MORDAUNT NEXT QUESTION

5) Forgotten

Is it time for Jack Frost of all people to make an appearance or is this just Bucky again

6) Head Injury

It would be real easy to just put the headbonk au here but i’m going to try to show some restraint and do a different headbonk story

7) Screaming

Going to assign Gwynplaine here just because he really has been neglected in this lineup and also it would probably be good for him to vent a little bit in this manner

8) Comfort

Someone’s going to get petted like a cat and i just haven’t decided whomst but when i do it’s over for everybody

9) Self-Sacrifice

What do i even say to that i Feels like another New Pack but it’s still up for grabs tbh

10) Trapped

Tempted to pour one out and just say Bucky but idk idk we’ll think of something this is very much a first draft stream of thought general idea planning session

11) Near Death Experience

It would be hilarious to just put something like Meet Joe Black for this one but WAIT NO NO GO BACK ACTUALLY WARM BODIES LET’S DO WARM BODIES

12) Regret

It’s gotta either be Psych or TURN

13) Tragedy

My first thought is to do a damn Hannibal fic without ever having actually watched the show just because i’m still angry about how i read it ended but considering that i only know the characters’ voices from tumblr chatposts i feel like that’s not the best venue to

heck we might just do New Pack

14) Battlefield

Either TURN or New Pack or....the song’s a little bit dramatic for a Bucky but actually....unless? no....but Maybe,

15) Anxiety

Every character i’ve ever cared about could potentially fit right here so :/ Arman could have 3rd ficlet but again, literally every character, i,,,,,they’ve all got anxiety X’D

[sweetestlamb]

Lighting Up Your World Part 2

Episode 18 

Author’s notes: THANK YOU!!!!!  I’ll start there, thank you guys for your overwhelming support on part 1 that I posted yesterday. You guys make me feel like such a great writer, hearing that some of you cried because of something I wrote. incredible. This part is shorter because I was a bit strapped for time and I scrapped  a vast amount the original version I had because I got new ideas and I just didn’t feel like the other version was enough or had the feeling I wanted. Anyway, I hope you guys still enjoy Part 2 aka Episode 18. Tell me your favorite line in the comments, I just think that would be cute hehe lol. *Plays “Lighting Up Your World”  ♫ ♫

He remembers the exact moment that he purchased the ring, its sparkling brilliance from under the glass display, he imagined it sitting on her dainty fingers taking the place of her many other decorative rings. He imagined her face has he placed it on her finger. The store associate had wondered over to him with a knowing smile on his face, as if he knew that look very well, had seen it on the lovesick faces of countless men. After a few minutes of rapid questioning, he walked out with the precious stone in his possession, nerves shooting up and down his veins until he felt like a ball of anxiety.  The ring heavy as lead in his pocket as he staggered home in a daze, in disbelief at what he'd done.

When he had come home to the castle, he could feel the ring burning a hole through the pocket of his jeans. His heart pattering away, erratic in his chest. He avoided eye contact with Mun-yeong as she greeted him at the door, candied smile welcoming home as she eagerly pulling him into the house demanding that he play with her. 

She hadn’t been amused by his suggestion of cards.

Viciously pushing him in the wall and latching onto his neck like a leech. Hours later, he stumbled out of bed panting as he stealthily hid the box in the bottom of his drawer,covering it with mounds of clothes before tiptoeing into his bed alongside his brother dreaming of Mun-yeong in pristine white walking down an aisle that was laden with soft pink rose petals that matched the hue of her lips. He woke up saying "I do." Relieved that his brother was a relatively deep sleeper and hadn't heard his slip of tongue.

The sounds of nature, birds chirping and the wind rustling leaves pulled him from the sandman's hold, as he blinked awake, rubbing the remnants of sleep from his eyes. Immediately he noticed the lack of pressure on his arm, too light without her head cushioned on his bicep as she used him as her personal pillow. He had long stopped trying to get her to use a pillow, she was adamant that his arms were a perfect substitute. A wave of pride blossomed in his chest every time she would stroke a finger across the bulging muscle, humming in approval, openly appreciating his body.

Stumbling to the bathroom he groggily brushes his teeth before hopping in the shower to wash off the sweat that lingered from being pressed against her flesh all night. After changing into his outfit, another t-shirt and jeans with sneakers, he’s a creature of habit. He walks out of the camping can eyes scouting for his missing girlfriend before finding her over the open grill, poking at the meat she's grilling, tongue poking out slightly as she impatiently waits for their tenderness.

What he doesn't expect to see is a little helper on her side, Min-jo, sits in the chair right next to her, eagerly watching the meat as it grills, babbling away at Mun-yeong, who for the most part looks content in the child's presence.

"How do I pick the people I put in my family?" Her innocent voice lifts with curiosity as she peers up at Mun-yeong, eyes shining brightly with young hope and naivete. "What age will I be ready to choose my family?"

With a sigh he watches Mun-yeong bring a slightly underdone piece of beef to her mouth, she's always too impatient to wait for food to reach its necessary temperature for consumption, higher internal heat his ass. The juices from the meat run down the side of her mouth, and he's left feeling like he's watching a lioness in the wild, lethal and it is majestic.

"Didn't I already tell you to stop following me? I don't have any answers for you." She dismissively responds, looking exasperated clearly this isn't her first time hearing and rebuking this question.

He coughs to announce his arrival, watching both their eyes snap up to settle on him, one pair with adoration the other disinterest then glee. 

Min-jo greets him first, "Hi, Mr.Prince!" She waves enthusiastically at him, little hand looking like it could take flight at any moment, he blushes at his new moniker, glaring at Mun-yeong who smirks at the intended response.

"You don't need to call me that, remember I told you my name." He answers sheepishly rubbing his neck.

"But Ms. Witch told me that you and your brother, who is an illustrator saved her from her castle and then you lived happily ever after. I never knew that princes could save witches." She says the last sentence with pure wonder, sighing softly.

"Only if they're pretty princes just can't resist a pretty witch. They follow them wherever they go." Mun-yeong teasingly eyed him, images of young Gang-tae happily trailing after a dispassionate Mun-yeong playing out in both of their memories.

"Well I didn't exactly save her from the castle, I just lived there with her. Together, we made it happier. We became a family and a family has to live together, so they can lean on each other and not do pointless work." Mun-yeong scoffs at his reminder of Sang-tae's story, rolling her eyes affectionately at him.

"That sounds nice. And now you live on a house on wheels. I've never seen one before." She eyes the camping van, as he approaches them taking the last chair, on the left with Mun-yeong in the center.

"How long have you two been here?"

"This brat came here an hour ago, I keep telling her to go away but she won't listen. " She hands his a bowl of food and he notes with barely concealed amusement that a smaller bowl is aggressively placed in Min-jo's grasping hands.

"Thank you Miss Witch!" Min-jo chirps sweetly, scarfing down the food without another word.

Mun-yeong watches her before devouring her own food, her leg brushing against his when she sways into his body heat, a morning chill lingering in the air, as he glances at her and notices that she is wearing a short cotton romper, soft blue with white speckles splashed across the material. Drastic shift from yesterday's funeral best, he smiles at the implications. He wraps an arm around her shoulder drawing her into his heat, her hum of satisfaction rumbling through his body.

Min-jo's chopsticks clink on the bowl as she asks, "If you two share a brother, does that mean you are brother and sister?" His cheeks redden at the inquisitive child.

"No. He's my boyfriend, we share his brother."

"Oh." She easily accepts before adding to his embarrassment, "What do you do with a boyfriend?"

He whips his head to stare at Mun-yeong willing her not to ruin the innocence of a child, she looks back at him with a straight face before answering, "Well a lot of fun things. Sometimes we kiss, he likes that a lot and sometimes we even--"

"Yah!" He pinches her arm, hard.

She slaps him in retaliation, pouting as she soothes her pained skin, "I was going to say hug and hold hands. Why did you pinch me?"

He doesn't believe her for one second, her filter non-existent indiscriminate of the audience.

He glares at her until she resumes eating her food, ignoring the rest of Min-jo’s constant stream of questions. If she kept this up she could be an adept detective. 

Entertaining a child has never been a task he's been troubled with before and he worries his lip as he looks at the little girl bouncing in her chair with unfiltered glee. They’d made the mistake of feeding her and now she had a boundless amount of energy, unable to keep still for even a moment. 

"What should we do now Miss Witch?"

"I'm not here to entertain you. And he's my toy so you can't play with him." She juts her thumb in his direction, he admonishes at her statement arguing that he is not a toy. She nods unconvincingly as if his arguments are futile and she has already made up her mind.

"I'm bored." Min-jo continues, ignoring them. 

"Then leave."

"But I don't want to." She whines. 

"Then make your own fun."

Their bickering reminds him so much of Mun-yeong and Sang-tae tears prickle in his eyes as he decides to check on his brother. It's been two days since his abrupt departure, the longest they've been without each other. He softly announces that he'll her right back before disappearing into the van, their rising voices following him each step of the way.

I'm fine. I'm working and drawing. Stop worrying, have fun with Mun-yeong. Remember a kiss is better than a fight.

The highlights of his conversation with his older brother, who had answered on his third ring, rushing him off the phone because he was quote, "very booked and busy", he really needed to stop Mun-yeong from teaching his hyung her ridiculous slang. Especially phrases like that, that even he couldn't decipher. He had hummed along as if he wasn't completely lost before bidding Sang-tae goodbye.

He took a moment for himself before rejoining them outside, letting his brother's voice wash over him. He knew their relationship had a tinge of codependency but hadn't realized to what extent until their separation. This was good for them. Healthy. He knew that now.

It just hurt a little right now, but that was okay. Pain wasn't permanent.

The sounds of water splashing hit his ear drums as he jumps off the last step of the camping van, as if on autopilot he rushes to the lake, cold chill on his skin as he searches for Mun-yeong.

She stands on the bank of the lake. Safely out of reach, watching as Min-jo flaps her little arms wildly keeping herself afloat. She is helped by the presence of bright pink floaties on her arms, buoying her onto the surface of the wet escape.

"Can you come in the water Miss Witch?"

He watches Mun-yeong gaze at the water, fear bleeding into her irises before she blinks it away. Brief and clipped response, "No."

There is a pregnant pause, before the child continues, "Are witches afraid of water?"

Mun-yeong's eyes are cold as she looks at Min-jo, he watches the interaction enraptured in this achingly honest conversation encrypted in their own language.

"Yes."

He's releases a breath he didn't know he was hiding. Watching Min-jo nod at her response, "That's okay. Everyone is scared of something. I'm scared of being alone. But you said when I'm older I can find a family. Maybe one day you'll find a way to be in the water." She says it matter of fact, like she has no doubt that Mun-yeong will conquer this fear. 

The sun is no longer as high in the sky and the skyline begins to swirl into hues of pink, orange and yellow. Like a mad painter dragged their unwashed paintbrush across the surface. 

"I think it's time we took you back." His voice breaks their bubble as they turn to look at him. He smiles at them both, charmed by this little whirlwind who has bulldozed her way into Mun-yeong's path. Vaguely wondering what happens when a tornado and a hurricane meet? 

They walk back to the diner, Min-jo in the center and the eyes that land on them make him wonder if they look like a family, Min-jo had reached out to grasp their hands but Mun-yeong had slapped it away complaining of her dirty lake hands. The girl had only laughed before happily holding his hand instead before Mun-yeong broke between them, reminding her that he was her toy much to this chagrin.

The same older woman who had prevented Min-jo from following them the previous day, hastily bursts through the door as they draw close enough to be seen, her frantic voice shrill in the air, "Where have you been? Why did you leave without telling me? Are you okay?!" She grabs Min-jo, raptly checking her body for injuries, touching the wet hair on her head before looking at them angrily.

"Who are you? And why are you with this child?"

Min-jo beats them to answer, "This is the pretty witch and her prince." She beams at the woman, who looks taken back at the response.

He bows low in apology before continuing the explanation, "I'm Moon Gang-tae and this is my girlfriend Ko Mun-yeong. She came to find us we wanted to make sure she made it back safely."

She stares at him, scrutinizing his answer but once she sees that the girl is not harmed she sighs before accept his apology, "Okay. Thank you, I'm sorry for any trouble she caused you." She respectfully bows in return.

"You must have been really worried about her."

She freezes at his statement, looking down at Min-jo before averting her eyes, "No. I wasn't. I.....was just bothered thinking about her."

He raises an eyebrow at the defensive deflection.

"That's the same thing." Mun-yeong quips sharply.

The woman's eyes narrow but there is no argument.

They all stand in silence, the wind howls around them, darkness beginning to fall as the sun drifts into the water.

It is time for them to go. 

"Well this is goodbye, be well and stay safe." He bows once more, Mun-yeong waves once before turning away without another word to either. He shoots Min-jo an apologetic smile as her huge wet eyes follow Mun-yeong longingly.

Then she's ripping herself from the tight grip of the woman who cries at the action. She runs straight into Mun-yeong's back. Little feet thundering on the ground and she quickly closes the distance between them. 

"Wait."

Mun-yeong halts her movement, still facing away.

"Can....I?.." She stutters around the words that jumble in her mouth, eyes staring a hole in Mun-yeong's back, she must be impervious to its heat. After a long drawn out pause she bravely finishes her question, "Can I be apart of your family?" The hope laced in her voice batters at his heart, she's just a child who wants to be loved. Crying out for it. Begging for it.

"No."

Her little head bows in defeat, nodding as if she understands, nobody wants her and she doesn't belong anywhere.

She starts to walk back to the woman, all the previous joy and wonder sucked from every cell of her body. Walking as if a marionette on a string, stilted.

"We're leaving. A family needs to stay together, to lean on each other." Mun-yeong's voice causes her to pause mid step, a twinge warmer than it was earlier. The first day of spring after winter's bitter cold. "You should find a family that worries about you and who needs someone to lean on too. A family that will never leave you."

He watches as those huge eyes slowly travel until they land on the lady. She runs back to her, body trembling as she looks at her like she's seeing her for the first time. Eyes now able to see what has always been right in front of her. 

"Can we be a family?"

The woman gasps, turning her head away, eyes glistening. Min-jo reaches out and takes her hand, small palms appearing even tinier in the woman’s hold as she peers up hopeful once more.

He turns away before he can see the conclusion, walking away to fall into step with Mun-yeong, who turns to meet his gaze. He notices the tear streaks on her skin, fondly looking at her, falling ever more in love.

"How did it end?"

He shrugs, taking her hand, "I didn't stay. But I hope it's a happy ending."

"Me too." She squeezes his hand, tightly. 

******************************************************************************************

She wordlessly goes into the camping van announcing that she wants to take a nap. He nods at her, pressing a kiss to her wet cheek before letting her go.

He opens the box of supplies he bought days ago, nerves all but obliterated, he's never been surer of anything in his life. He works diligently but quietly, eyes tracking the door of the camping van to ensure Mun-yeong doesn't suddenly appear before he's done. As he finishes his last touches, he climbs the stairs of the camping van. Eyes softening at the sight of his girlfriend laying on his bed roll, snuggling into his night shirt. He coos at the rare and precious sight, loathing the idea of waking her.

The choice is taken from him when her lashes flutter open and her unfocused eyes land on him, she jumps up nonchalantly hiding the shirt behind her. He pretends not to see it, pointedly looking away from her. Before he beckons her up.

"Come with me."

He offers his hand, sees her in all blue glowing in the sun as she waited for him.

Once again, she takes his hand. It's just as sweet as the first time. His heart is giddy with love.

He contemplates asking her to close her eyes but ultimately decided against it, he wants her to see and relish every moment.

Her small gasp as he pushes the door open makes his heart tremble and do a back-flip, bouncing all around the cavities of his chest. She looks around astonished at the scene, the faint twinkling of the fairy lights that adorn the camping van, blinking rhythmically, like stars that fell from the sky, the long winding path of rose petals that lead to a blanket that is topped with a bountiful basket and a bucket with wine.

"Wow."

She turns to look at him, eyes glossy and shining under the luminescence of the fairy lights. "What is this?"

He doesn't answer her question, actions have always spoken louder than words for him. He escorts her down the path of petals, softly crunching under their feet. Until they reach the blanket and he helps her sit before lowering himself next to her.

He opens the basket, removing all the food he purchased and hid away, small sandwiches and fresh fruits. He plucks a strawberry out before pressing it to her lips, "Open up." The dark desire that rolls through her eyes makes his body flush in return. She obeys silently, wrapping her lips around the soft flesh of the berry, biting down, relishing at the flavor before swallowing. She feeds him a slice of honey dew in return, fingers dragging across his lips bewitchingly.

They consume the rest of the food in silence, feeding themselves and each other in equal turns. Before he pours them both a bottle of the cheap wine he was able to purchase in a liquor store in the town. Her eyes never leave his face as she drinks the wine, captivated by his every move.

"Are you full?" He whispers not wanting to interrupt the calm that has settled like a warm blanket over them.

"Yes, I'm no longer hungry." Intentional pause, as her eyes lock on his lips. "For food."

Adjusting himself in his pants he ignores her tempting offer, for now. The main event is still around the corner and he needs all his wits for that.

Taking her hand in his large palms, he rubs his thumb along the soft skin, gazing into her eyes with his own laid open, wanting her to see everything he feels.

"Mun-yeong, I love you. I love who I am with you, who I've become with you, I want to be with you always."

She blinks at his words, words escape her as she stares at him. He doesn't give her a chance to flounder much more, pulling out what he had hidden in his pocket and placing it in her hand.

The button eyes of the nightmare doll, glow under the moonlight and she looks down at the thing she once dismissed as "ugly crap", now a prized possession.

"Mang-tae?..."

"I'm still a coward a little, he's going to help me tell you a message." He guides her eyes to the scroll sticking from the pouch, all too similar to her concealed message to him.

She slowly pulls the paper from the sack, hands trembling as she unfurls it and reads the message written. She's a fast reader, incredibly so, he knows that and the message is fairly short yet she stares at it for what feels like hours, maybe even years, time is relative in the moment.

She reads the message again and again and again and again and again. 

Before she finally puts it down. Then the tears come, easily, flowing like a river, soaking the neck of her romper and she lets them fall, doesn't interrupt their journey, allows herself this brief moment of vulnerability.

She's never looked more beautiful in his eyes.

He tells her so, "You look so beautiful. I want to see this face until I die."

Without a word she places Mang-tae tenderly on the blanket, before crawling into his arms, wrapping her own around his neck and she answers his question with a kiss. Their lips crash together with enough force to knock him backwards, dragging her with him as they tumble on the blanket.

Her tongue prods at his mouth and he eagerly allows her entrance, moaning at the sweet flavor of strawberry that floods his taste buds, sucking her tongue into his mouth to get more. His hands rub at the exposed skin of her back, traveling down to squeeze her soft lush ass, bringing their pelvis in contact. She grinds down sensually on his erection, moaning at the hot sensation. He pulls the tie holding her romper together, pulling back from the kiss to strip her bare. She resembles a wood nymph naked underneath the smattering of stars in the inky sky, the forest rustles around them.

While he's lost in the glory of her body, she undresses him, pulling his shirt over his head and pressing hot open kisses against his stomach, before unbuttoning his pants and pulling them own with his boxers in one firm tug. Then she hungrily gazes at his body, hands massaging his thighs before she crawls back into his arms, their bodies slotting together like puzzle pieces.

Their tongues meet in a languid battle, bodies rolling against each other like waves, uncontrollably. He presses a curious finger at the folds hidden between her thighs and groans at the enticing wetness that surrounds the digit. Coating in her sweet juices. She shakes her head above him, lifting up to dislodge his finger. He looks at her in question.

"I'm too close. I can't take foreplay. Make love to me." She pleads, demands, begs. All of them, at once.

She steals his breath, just like she did his heart and his control. He wonders what he will have left after her? What will still be his when she takes it all? He would give anything to her.

He is incapable of denying her so with a gentle grip of her waist he moves her aligning their bodies before his cock brushes against her most intimate spot, with a fluid tilt of his hip he slides into her tight pussy, it feels like coming home.

He exalts at the sensation, letting it roll over him, basking in her constrictions around him as she wiggles in his arms before pulling his ear lobe into her wet mouth, "Please."

He thrusts into her, powerful but steady, drawing her close and forcing her to meet him. She begins to ride him, feet planted beside his hips as she rams herself down into his hard cock, the view is unbelievable her face twisted in euphoria under a million dazzling stars, he takes a snapshot in his mind.

Before she knocks all thoughts out of his head, plunge down harder and faster onto him, he grabs her waist desperately, needing to slow her down. But she fights his grip, pushing his hands beside his head and he could easily take control but as he watches her fall apart he realizes she needs this. Desperately. Everything tonight has been out of her control, she needed to gain some of it back. Needed to find her footing as he effortlessly swept her off her feet. 

He lets her hold his hands down, giving no resistant, watching her fuck herself on him, entranced by the indecent sight of his dick disappearing in and reappearing out of her. In. Out. In. Out. InOut. InOut. She sets a punishing pace despite asking him to make love to her but he muses that their version of love hasn't always been gentle or tranquil, sometimes it was volatile even explosive so for them this is making love. It similar to everything else in their lives has layers, that they are continually peeling back to expose a new coat. 

She starts to moan loudly, little ahs so sweet in the wind, twisting and undulating until every downward thrust bumps against her clit, she keens as she pants out his name, "Moon Gang-tae, Moon Gang-tae!"

He holds on for the ride, hips slamming violently into hers as she tightens around him, walls crushing him until finally she shakes in his arms, her body twitching almost out of his hold and he swiftly snatches her back, drilling into the tight wall of her pussy until he feels his pinnacle nearing, the blood in his head surges and he feel his length swell and explode as he tumbles over the edge, driving every last drop of him inside her until she's stuffed full.

She collapses onto him, knocking the wind from his lung. But he takes her weight, wrapping her in his arms.

"Yes." She breaths into his ears.

Sliding out of the tight glove of her pussy he rolls to the side, catching Mang-tae once more, her brows farrow again.

"You didn't let me finish." He gently chides. Taking her hand and bringing it the the pouch on the doll's back once more, he sees the shock that washes over her features, eyes large in wonder as she pulls out the object hidden inside.

A sparkling gold ring, a modest princess cut diamond sits proudly on top, as beautiful as its new owner.

"Are you serious?" Her voice trembles, the tears coming again.

"Yes. But right now it's just a promise ring, a promise that one day I'll be a man who's worthy of being your husband. I wanted to give it to you now so you know that I'm yours and I want you to be mine in very sense of the word. What do you say?"

Her face crinkles into a smile, "You promised not to make me cry again. You already broke that promise tonight. You better not break this one."

He chuckles, "Those are happy tears that doesn't count. And you didn't answer my question." He needs to hear her answer.

She looks at him from under her lashes, naked and beautiful under the inky black night sky, lips blessing him with her response, "Sure. Why not?"

He smiles at the nonchalant answer as she weeps, before taking the ring from her hand, gently pressing the ring onto her finger, it looks like it belongs, perfect fit.

She tackles him onto the blanket, showering his face with kisses as he laughs loudly, freely. Living out his wildest dream with girl that he liked who become the woman that he loves. 

The message on the scroll crushed between their weight. But the words are unaffected.

Marry me, someday?

They were in no rush they had a lifetime ahead of them. 

Maybe even another after that, if they were reincarnated and destiny brought them together again. 

*******************************************************************************************

She drives them to their new location, he doesn't comment on her driving past the diner or looking through the glass to see Min-jo happily talking to the woman, their hands wrapped around each other as she pulls the lady behind her, excitedly jabbering. Neither of them say anything but she smiles the whole drive after, humming along to BLACKPINK on the radio. 

♫ ♫ Dududududu  ♫ ♫

He still doesn't comment when they end up at another site with a lake and mountains in the background.

After using the bathroom when he comes out of her van he finds her standing on the bank of the river. Feet barely grazing the water.

Wrapped around her arms are the bright pink floaties he saw on Min-jo's arms.

His breath hitches as she looks back at him, defiant smile on her face. Her ring shining from its permanent spot on her finger. 

She takes a step towards the water.

[fizzingwizard]

So I’m sure you’re ALL on tenterhooks to find out what I thought of episode 36... the answer is.... LOVED IT!!!! No I really did. If you like Taishiro friendship, this is an essential episode to watch. Doesn’t blow me out of the water, but still just good.

Although Taichi has a big something to do as usual, it’s still very much a Koushirou episode. FREAKING YAY. I have a dozen thoughts about it, and what bugs me the most, of course, is how we needed this episode AGES ago ugh. But we’ve now had two or three episodes in a row that have actually felt like Digimon Adventure, so perhaps all that finger-crossing is working?

They could unravel all that good work in a minute by never addressing it again... or not letting Koushirou show his personality unless it’s his “turn” for an episode from here on... but you know, I will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Pic of the day:

“I don’t like people. But they are occasionally useful.” - 2020 Izumi Koushirou’s life lesson, lmao

*The red strip at the top is about the big earthquake that hit Eastern Japan yesterday. It’s annoying to have it there for the entire episode - usually they only stick around for a couple minutes - but this WAS a large earthquake. It caused many people to lose power. So making sure everyone knows what’s going takes precedence over Sunday morning cartoons. (I’m in Osaka and didn’t even feel it, but my friends in Tokyo prefecture very much did.)

Lots and LOTS of ranting from a rabid Taishiro fan under the cut!

(also I didn’t check for typos so. yeah)

The episode starts right off by assuring us this is a Koushirou episode. We get the trademark Izumi Koushirou floating in the void of space sequence, which is excellent and very encouraging framing.

Koushirou Kenobi: “Use the force, Taichi.”

Taichi: “Use it yourself.”

(the episode in a nutshell)

The initial thing that bugged me - okay, so the kids got separated for the umpteenth time many episodes ago, and since then we’ve stuck to Taichi like barnacles. The only glimpses we’d get of the other kids showed: Yamato running towards something, Koushirou flying towards something while researching the satellite malfunction, Jou in the hot springs, and Mimi at the crystal caves. For Jou and Mimi, I don’t care, because they never tried to move, but Yamato and Koushirou were constantly moving. Yet, in the end, it’s Taichi’s group that catches up with Koushirou, rather than the other way around. It DOES make sense - it seems like Koushirou told them to “meet at the giant gold pillar” because that’s where they needed to be to save the world, so it became the rendezvous point. But it just bugs me because, once again, all the activity is on Taichi’s side. But that’s a minor quibble. The end result is still THIS:

More of the team is together!!! Taichi and Koushirou are together!!! Yaaayy!!!

... the betting pool for how long it will be till the next separation is now open >.>

Poor Komodomon’s long mop dog fur is so dirty. “Fizz his fur always looks like that.” He’s tracking mud everywhere. “Fizz look at his ears his fur is supposed to look that way.” Next episode - everyone gives Komondomon a bath.

So the start of this episode is just a bunch of talking about how dire things are with the satellite situation. I’m not gonna bother translating. Watch the sub when it’s out if you really want to know :P The important thing is, the gold pillar is directly causing the malfunction, no one on Earth can stop the satellite from plummeting to Tokyo, the city is being evacuated, and there are only 20 minutes till impact.

Koushirou has an elaborate plan which Sora adorably sums up as “So, we’re gonna shoot it out of the sky *makes punching motion*”

The crux of Koushirou’s plan hinges on a repeat of how Omegamon saved Tokyo from the missile way back in like, episode 2 or 3. Taichi says, “Yeah, but I barely remember how we did that.” Which is hilarious because I don’t remember either because it was 30 EPISODES AGO. Once again this episode feels like it was meant to happen WAY EARLIER THAN IT DID. It’s just weird to be referencing something that happened 30 episodes ago after everything else that’s happened, AND on top of that, there are many references in this episode and none from later than like, episode 10 or 12. Making this all seem very oddly timed.

I’m not quite sure if, within the story itself, it matters that Taichi “doesn’t remember well.” He also doesn’t remember the Devimon battle where he and Agumon were infected with dark energy. That one makes sense for him not to remember. If that hadn’t happened, I would just take his “I don’t remember how we stopped the missile” to just mean it was so long ago. But together, it’s making me wonder if something else is going on.

Or maybe Taichi’s just been hit on the head one too many times (okay, that seems the most likely of all, haha)

People of Tokyo: Is it Godzilla again? I heard he’s itching to fight King Kong. You know, given how often our city is attacked by kaiju, some might wonder why we haven’t moved away by now. But home is home, ya know?

The group sets up to fly to the peak of the gold pillar. Obviously, without Yamato, there’s no Omegamon. No one points this out, but Koushirou seems very stressed with his plan, and it seems that he contacted Taichi in the first place because he thought “Taichi’s the one who can pull this off.”

After hearing the plan, Taichi shoots him through the heart with another “Koushirou, you’re so awesome!” and YAY I MISSED THIS SO MUCH!!!!!! *sobs*

Then he does his best to reassure Koushirou by remaining positive and determined that they can and will do this no matter how much Koushirou waves. The majority of the episode is them flying up the pillar while being assaulted by enemies trying to stop them, so it’s not like they get to talk about their feelings (lol). But at least we get a bunch of close ups of Koushirou’s and Taichi’s expressions, and that’s how we see this dynamic in play. Yes, Koushirou is the brainy one who made the plan, but he doesn’t have the confidence to take the lead, so he handed the reins to Taichi. As for Taichi - yes he has the confidence, yes he can do it... but he also has absolute faith in Koushirou. So that’s why this episode makes my little Koushirou fanatic heart skip a beat.

First of the enemies is this guy, aptly named BladeKuwagamon.

They’re actually pretty scary! They do real damage. (Blood in Digimon word is glowy unicorn-like stuff haha). Birdramon gets stabbed, but before Sora can get too upset, she just yanks the blade out of her chest...

... and then crushes it into dust with her beak.

Sora: Holy crap, my partner is metal AF.

Forgot to mention earlier but 5 whole minutes of the 20 minute countdown are used up just by digivolving apparently xD Taichi keeps asking Koushirou “how much time is left” and Koushirou’s panic grows more visible with each passing second...

MetaLiffeKuwagemon looks cooler than he is. Supposedly he’s there to bring out the big guns, but to be honest...

... the BladeKuwagamon don’t seem to need the help :P The enemy’s strategy is obvious: isolate each member of the team to prevent anyone from getting to the top. This is why Koushirou’s so stressed: he’s got a plan that is totally reliant on there being a leader strong enough to pull it off AND there being enough backup to protect that leader from the large number of enemies. And Koushirou doesn’t like these odds.

Garudamon gets stabbed AGAIN

Sora: Go on, we’ll be fine.

Taichi: Are you sure??

Garudamon: *DESTROYS EVERYTHING WITH FIRE*

I MEAN HONESTLY! Garudamon is not only my favorite of Piyomon’s evolutions, it’s pretty much my favorite Adventure evolution. Always has been since I was 11 years old. And she (and Sora) NEVER get that credit. Like. Growing up, with US dub Adventure, I interpreted Sora as more of a straight up tomboy than she is in the original. That’s okay, that’s whatever, but what was most important to me was that I saw her as the third “strong” member along with Taichi and Yamato. Those two were clearly in a class above her, but I saw her as being in the same “Taiorato” league. Garudamon seemed to prove that: she was so cool, so powerful, and... yeah, I just always thought she had so much potential to be awesome and never got why it wasn’t used. That’s also why I was disappointed in Tri - like, I liked Soushitsu, but I just wanted more from Sora’s arc. Same thing in Kizuna: I understand Sora’s arc, I don’t hate it or anything - I think it makes sense for her. But since I wanted something different for her all those years ago, it just left me feeling a bit flat.

but enough about other Digimon series :P Garudamon gets to be super cool here and I only hope we get to see more of it in this reboot. I’ll forgive it some of its other mistakes if we do :D

With Takeru/Hikari and Sora isolated by the BladeKuwagamon, it’s up to Taichi and Koushirou alone to race against the clock! Their teeth are clenched, sweat runs in rivulets down their skin, their hearts are pounding in desperation...

Koushirou: Taichi-san! If we don’t get to the top soon it’ll be too late!

Taichi: Just don’t call me late for dinner!

Koushirou: ASDFGHJKL;’ DAD JOKES NOW?? REALLY????????

MetaLiffeKuwagamon makes life that much harder by knocking them against the pillar. However, this is a pillar of data, which enabled the BladeKuwagamon to evolve into MetaLiffeKuwagamon in the first place. Bugs aren’t that bright.

Taichi and MetalGreymon are nearly submerged inside the pillar as a result, and then we get this sequence of red and black. The pillar had been emitting dark lightning, so I started to think... omg... is MetalGreymon gonna get a Dark Evolution???????

.... Nah. That would have made sense, but.... nah :P

Overall I’m glad though, because that would really have turned this into a Taichi episode instead of a Koushirou one.

I’m not personally certain what the point of bringing BlitzGreymon out was. I had figured he would be like, a super fast evolution that would enable them to make it to the top. That would also have turned this into a Taichi episode. But...

... Taichi tells Koushirou that he will have to go divert the satellite because Taichi has to deal with MetaLiffeKuwagamon.

I was both really pleased and really surprised. Because, again, now what’s the point of BlitzGreymon...? Why did we need a new Agumon evolution? There’s no particular reason why they couldn’t have just isolated Taichi with the enemy the same way the others were and had him tell Koushirou to keep going on his own then. They did do that, but first they gave him a new evolution. Why? Just because it’s cool?? I assume that must be the reason but we don’t even see BlitzGreymon fight xD It’s... it’s weird. But whatever.

Taichi: Go, Koushirou!!!!! You can do it!!!!!

Fiz: *dies a thousand brilliant deaths*

So, Koushirou tells Taichi that he can’t do it - he can support Taichi, but he can’t take the lead. Taichi’s just like that’s wack, dude, of course you can do it. What I LOVE about Taichi and Koushirou’s dynamic is just that: Taichi never sees Koushirou as a weakling. The fact that he’s small, or that he’s brains over brawn, or even that he’s kinda antisocial - those are all reasons an energetic, extroverted kid like Taichi might bully, or at least think poorly, of Koushirou.

But Taichi values Koushirou. He knows how hard he works and is impressed both by that hard work and his talent. What’s more, he doesn’t see Koushirou’s brains as his support system. The whole time Koushirou’s thinking he’s there to support Taichi with his plan, Taichi was thinking, “I’m here to support Koushirou’s plan.” That is SO, SO important. And that’s why I LOVE this episode. The one thing the reboot seemed to really understand, that hooked me from the start, was the way it just GOT Taichi and Koushirou. They each support and follow each other, while each feeling like the other is better than them. Ugh I could like, cry over Taishiro now... omg....

Taichi is successful in pushing Koushirou to go on, but of course Koushirou himself is still plagued with doubts. He reflects on how he’s always been fine being alone. He hasn’t particularly wanted friends and didn’t mind not having them, even though adults worried.

(Side note: this is a normal, if kinda rare, personality trait. I have it too. I always score Koushirou on “what Digimon character are you?” tests too lmao. Just like some people feel the need to be surrounded by others at all times, there are those whose social needs are very very low. I’m one of them. There’s nothing wrong with it except that even those people can get lonely and it’s easy to misunderstand them as shy or snobby. So what I love about Koushirou is, yes he learns to value his relationships more, but also learns to value himself. He is Koushirou: a brainy kid who’s happy on his own, but also happy with friends. While some people, like Mimi, struggle with that aspect of his personality, others, like Taichi, just accept it. To me that’s the best life lesson there is: there are always people who can and will be friends with you. Yes, I’ve lost friends because I just wasn’t social enough for them. But I have other friends who I’ve known for literal decades now. And I REALLY love those friends.)

Koushirou feels grateful that he has AlturKabuterimon, and also that he has Taichi. So... here he is, reflecting on the last time he had meaningful interaction with that great friend Taichi... back in episode three. -____________-

Seriously, this would mean a lot more if this dynamic had been built on continually until this episode...

Koushirou then briefly reflects on each of the other Chosen. Notably, every single solo image of them is from an episode that Koushirou either wasn’t in or wasn’t with them at the moment. Then we get this group image. It’s from EPISODE 12. (I’m actually not sure of the episode number but the point is, it’s from A LONG LONG TIME AGO. I think it’s the swamp episode??) That drives me NUTS. We shouldn’t have to reach soooo far back to find meaningful moments!!! Urk.

Koushirou makes it to the peak of the pillar and AlturKabuterimon attacks the satellite to drive it off course. We see the impression of what looks to be HerculesKabuterimon and I really thought we’d get an evolution - it seemed way more appropriate than freaking BlitzGreymon - but nope.

Oh well. Koushirou still saves the day. The people at home get to see the Crest of Knowledge take over their screens, hopefully giving rise to the idea that a nerd superhero is protecting them. Koushirou is the hero we deserve.

The satellite falls into the water. I was like, shouldn’t that cause a tsunami lol?

... be careful what you wish for >_>;

fortunately people were evacuated soooo things will be okay.

He did it!! He’s so happy! AlturKabuterimon’s triumphant holler is adorable.

Taichi and BlitzGreymon fought hard OFF SCREEN!! OFF SCREEN!! HIP HIP HOORAY! And then we get to see him leaning on Sora T_T could this episode give me any more perfect moments?? Looooove it

So yeah, if you can’t tell, I’m thrilled with this episode. There are just a couple things I would have liked to improve: better animation, at least one palpable heart to heart between Taichi and Koushirou, or just a bit more time spent explictly in Koushirou’s head - but honestly we got something that is pretty darn good, especially for this reboot. I hope we do get more like this, both for Koushirou and for the others. I hope the growth here isn’t forgotten moving forward. I really, REALLY want to see more of that “I lead, you support me - you lead, I support you” mutually beneficial relationship that is the foundation of Taishiro <3

So next week! Mimi’s back and the heads are gonna roll!

Lmao!

My theory that she’s finding crystals to make Crests seems unlikely to be the case now that we know the rocks constract the rock Digimon. But... hey, we’ll find out next week.

Also Taichi’s gonna make this face after talking with Mimi bahahahaha. I can’t wait.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

10x21: Details

Okay, let’s talk details. And most of these will just back up what I’ve already said about these sequences being callbacks to Grady and leaving Beth behind, as well as foreshadows of finding her again.

***As always, spoilers abound below for 10x21. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

Carol and Dog:

Of course Dog goes with Carol and I noticed that when she gets back to Alexandria, she says, “let’s get you home.” So, home theme, and it’s especially potent because Dog = Beth.

She says to Dog, “For the record, I didn’t need an apology for him.” It’s the ‘for the record’ part that caught my attention, not only because Beth mentioned records at Grady, but Negan said the exact same thing to Daryl about Carol several episodes ago. “For the record, I don’t think she’s coming back.” So, it’s something of a theme.

She tells Jerry the story of the Stone Soup, which to me parallels Rick’s “Rock in the Road” story, which we’ve always thought was about Beth. (X). And I’m not sure how exactly to interpret the rock in either story, but biblically Christ = the rock. So, there’s that.

We see her fixing the solar panels as well. Because of the sunlight angle, that could represent Beth. I’m actually seeing a lot of symbolism here for both Carol fixing Beth in some way and Beth fixing Carol. So, I think this has to do with the template for the future. I think the two of them will come together again, as they did at Grady, and they’ll both be kind of a mess at that point and need to help each other through some stuff. I’ll talk about it in more detail later when I do another forecasting post.

When Dog starts chasing the rat and Carol runs to see what’s happening, he knocks over a lamp. Lamp Theory. And the cord of the lamp has been gnawed on by the rat. So can you see how all these symbols kind of interlock?

When Dog chases the rat and knocks over the pot, Carol has a serious/Sirius mention. She says, “This is serious. We need that food.”

Now, for the record, I think food shortages are going to continue to be a thing, and Beth and the CRM will be the answer to needed resources, so both sides of that sentence are important.

She makes a trap to catch the rat, which I talked about yesterday. Then she goes out looking for more ingredients for the soup. While out there, we see a dragonfly, a blue butterfly, and a spider. All three of those are important symbols. 

They all represent some form of transformation, wisdom, renewal, and fertility.

It’s probably important that Carol uses Leah’s knife to fix the solar panels. Again, just more Beth symbols on top of Beth symbols.

@frangipanilove also pointed out that it’s important that the instant she can’t see the rat anymore, the power goes out. See how that works? Rat (Beth) is unseen and suddenly no sun power.

Carol also says at this part, “there will be more sun tomorrow, right?” That’s super important. Sun = Beth. And ever since AOW, I’ve thought the “tomorrow” theme pointed to the CRM war. So again, just more evidence that this is both a callback and a foreshadow of what will happen with Beth and CRM.

As I said yesterday, Dog watching over Carol as she sleeps = Beth watching over Carol while she’s unconscious at Grady. She also says to Dog, “You miss him, don’t you?” Which is exactly what Beth asked Daryl about Merle in Still.

And then of course she destroys the wall. The next day, Jerry comes to see her, and we get lots of interesting references. There’s the poker, poker face reference. He says, “caring…yeah that’s a problem,” which we’re connecting to Beth’s famous line, “when you care about people, hurt is just part of the package.”

Jerry also says, “2+2=Eureka.” Now, Eureka is an expression which means “a cry of joy or satisfaction when one finds or discovers something.” We’re hoping the 2+2 is a reference to episode 22, and the discovery is that Beth is alive. *fingers crossed*

The song that plays, No Worries by Amateur Blond, has references to dogs in it. And it keeps saying “Oh, oh, oh.”

Of course Daryl returns, Rat gets free, and I especially love how Dog runs to Daryl. Cuz, you know, Dog = Beth. :D

One other thing @frangipanilove​ brought to my attention. The scarf Carol has in this episode can be linked to the scarf she wore in S3. They actually look very similar. Remember that at the prison, when T-Dog died and Lori gave birth to Judith, Carol was wearing a scarf over her head. Daryl found it with blood on it, which led him to assume she was dead. They even created a grave for her. But of course he found her (after finding her knife, btw) soon after and she lived.

It’s just a little too coincidental that this can be connected to a death fake out in season 3, and there’s a major knife exchange going on in the same episode. 

Daryl and Bike:

Okay, so I talked a lot about Daryl yesterday and how Bike = Beth. The part where he gets under the car is really interesting. I’m not entirely satisfied with how to interpret it yet, but I do think it represents leaving Beth behind and stuff that happened during the missing 17 days. 

You could call Daryl’s behavior here destructive. I mean, he crawled under a precariously perched car. And that could represent his depression, to the point of self-harm, after losing Beth. He does find the part he needs in the 3rd car (rule of threes). And that car was somewhat hidden at first. 

He didn’t see it until he’d already reached and checked the first two cars. So, that could represent looking for Beth’s body but there’s an unseen element he isn’t aware of at first. It also parallels the “third man” theory. (X).

When he gets back to the bike, he suddenly realizes he gave the knife to Carol and he needs it. His huge, Rambo knife is just too big to get it into the crevices of the bike to attach the new part. 

I think this is important for the future story line as well. After the spinoff starts, when he and Carol part ways, he’ll give her something and realize he needs it later on. It’s when he goes looking for this part that he’ll run into the CRM and Beth.

I also noticed kind of a cute little parallel here. When he realizes he doesn’t have the knife and he needs it, he sort of does this thing where he brushes his hair out of his face. He did a similar thing in Consumed. 

I just remember a lot of people commenting on how adorable it was. So I thought I’d point it out here as well.

So then he goes looking of Beth, er, I mean a new knife. I talked about a lot of this yesterday: the Beth walker, his limp, the dry river bed, etc. It’s important that he finds the knife with military walkers (probably the CRM). I can’t help but wonder if letting walker fall into the ravine represents him letting one of their communities get overrun with walkers or something. 

I also REALLY want to connect it to when the group did this in Them. In that scene, Rick was almost bitten. Daryl came running up at the last minute and helped him, but I think it’s significant that they were doing the exact same thing there that we see Daryl doing here. I’m thinking it represents something about maybe him finding Rick with the CRM and helping him in some way, or something. Again, just speculating about future storylines here.

But he finds the knife he needs and goes back to the bike. And two more military walkers come at him. Yes, two. You may have missed that, as I and my fellow theorists both did the first time. But one is coming at him from ahead of the bike, down the tracks. 

The other is coming at him from his right side. You can tell because he turns his head to look at it.

Couple of things here. Part of the reason it only seems like one is that they show it weird. We only see him killing the one straight ahead, not the one to the side. I’m sure there’s some symbolism in that, but I honestly have no idea what it is.

But here’s an interesting thing. He finds a second knife on that second walker. It doesn’t do a close up on the second knife, so it’s easy to miss. But there are actually 2 knives.

Not entirely sure how to interpret that, but remember that in Still, there were two knives. First, Daryl gave Beth his, but between rooms in the golf club, she found her bone-handled one that she always carried after that, and gave his back to him. So it might just represent Beth and Daryl and their 2 knives.

He also finds military rations (food) on one of them. As I said yesterday, I think TF is going to get to the point where they desperately need resources. Where food is scarce and even water becomes undrinkable. It will be part of the CRM plot. So I think him finding food on military walkers hints at that. They will need the CRM’s resources to survive.

The other thing I’m curious about is what he says. He says, “You’ve got to be kidding me.” To me, that’s a weird reaction. There are walkers all over the place in these woods. And neither of these two are a massive, immediate threat to him. So his reaction doesn’t make tons of sense. But again, I’m sure it has something to do with a future storyline that simply isn’t clear here yet. 

Also, the walker he takes the knife from is missing his leg/foot. That’s part of the missing foot/shoe symbolism, and just proves in my mind that this is symbolic of something to do with Beth. 

He then sets to fixing his bike. But it takes a while and it’s dark before he finishes. This was super cool and something I missed the first time through. While fixing it, he hears a wolf howl. And they draw attention to it by having Daryl turn his head toward it, as thought acknowledging it. 

Plus, the captions say it’s a wolf, not a dog or a coyote. So, this is wolf symbolism. And I think what they’re trying to say her is that when Daryl finds and “fixes” Beth, the wolf symbolism will be in play. I’ll talk more about what the means and how it MIGHT manifest in coming days.

Finally, he gets the bike fixed and started and heads back.

@wdway​, as usual with her eagle eyes, noticed something about this shot. In the sky above him, we see three stars. They look suspiciously like the “spoon” portion of the Little Dipper. And guys, at this distant, stars wouldn’t even register on camera, which means they were put in purposely with a computer. Daryl is riding toward the spoon/star/Sirius symbol. Just saying. 

The only other thing I noticed (other than all the stuff I talked about yesterday, anyway) is that there is some missing time here. Daryl fixes his bike at night and we see him drive off into the darkness, but by the time he gets back and talks to Carol, it’s late afternoon or early evening, and he’s talking about going to bed. I don’t know if he could have gone out far enough for it to take him that long to get back. Of course, maybe he just looked some more the next day and didn’t come back right away. Maybe I’m reading too much into it. But it’s something I noticed.

So, yeah. I think that’s all the details I have. Anyone notice anything I missed?

[mother-snake]

I FOUND FREE TIME!! Sorry if this one is a bit rushed Jessie!!

Italics are memories

-----

The first thing a yellow side notices is that his head feels like its being split open. The second thing is that he's laying on a very soft couch. And the third? The third is that he doesn't remember anything.

He makes a slight noise of discontent before opening his eyes, only to have five people swarm him. Talking to him very fast and keep trying to touch him. He tries to curl up only to be unable to move.

One by one the colourful people back away only a dark blue person stayed by him. His lips keep moving but it all sounds like its underwater. Only to clear.

"-us, Janus! Can you hear us?"

His voice is raspy but he manages to respond, "Who's Janus?"

The people seemed to not like that answer, he didn't know why but making someone upset makes him feel like he's in danger, the indigo side didn't react that much.

"You are Janus, that is your name. Do you remember us?"

Janus shook his head.

"Well, I am Logan, Thomas's logic. The red side is Roman, one half of creativity. Green is Remus, the second half of creativity. The purple one is Virgil, he represents anxiety. And the light blue side is Patton. Thomas's morality.

Janus seemed to be taking the information in. Thinking about that one name he said... What was it? Timothy? Tobias? Travis?

"Do you remember Thomas?"

Janus had to stop and think. Thomas... Thomas was their centre. I'm one of his sides. Janus nodded

Logan handed Janus a glass of water, helping him take careful sips. The water felt like heaven, it was cool and soothing. But the heaven was gone soon enough.

"Do you remember your function?"

He squeezed his eyes shut trying to remember. "Deception?.....Or was it self preservation? I- I can't remember."

Logan had a small smile on his lips. "You are correct, your title is Deceit and your function is Self Preservation."

"Deceit... Isn't lying bad? Am I bad? Why does my head hurt?" Janus didn't notice the looks of pain on the others faces because they put those thoughts there.

Logan's smile disappeared. "No, you are not a bad side. You work for the good of Thomas. Why would you think that?"

"Because they told me so."

"Who?"

"..... I don't remember... They wore a lot of black."

"Do you mean the Dark Sides?"

A sharp gasp came from the yellow side. Blood, there is so much blood. Its my blood. Screaming. No, not screaming. Yelling. I'm running, the hallway is dark, the rug keeps triping me, my door lock is broken, I'm hiding... I can feel my breath.... The door to my room is open. Orange. I scream.

Janus is still screaming, he's trying to run but something is holding him down, he can feel someones breath. "Let me go! Please I'll do what you want!" he feels a slight sting in his arm before his eyes get blurry. The voices in the background get farther away as he feels himself involuntarily relax and fall back asleep.

Logan pulls the needle away as Roman, Remus and Virgil all let go of the sleeping side. Worry is blinding them as all of them walk into the kitchen to talk.

"The NopeRope doesn't remember anything. What do we do here?" Roman kept messing with his sash.

"His memory seems to come back with certain prompts or questions. However it seems to have a bad reaction-"

"A bad reaction? A BAD REACTION?? Logan, he was screaming for help while repeating the word no! That is more then JUST a bad reaction!!

Logan sighed, "Virgil, I know that you're worried about him but he does need to get his memory back."

"Does he?"

Everyone was now staring at Patton.

"I mean well, if he doesn't remember what the others put him through and what we put him through maybe he would be happier? He just looks to peaceful while he's asleep that I've never seen him have before."

"He will most likely remember anyway when he sees the scars, we can not hide this from him forever."

The kitchen was now an awkward silence. Until Remus broke it.

"How long till he wakes up, nerd?"

"Should be around 3 hou-"

"He'll be awake in five"

"What? Why five?"

"He's smaller then normal, plus he's not a full grown side yet, so-"

"What?" Patton didin't seem happy knowing that info.

Remus shugged, "he popped up in the gray when Thomas was ten, followed virgil around like a lost puppy next to a railroad. He just grew fangs a few months ago! I don't think they have venom though, bit of a shame. Everything is better with venom.-"

"Remus, getting off track here. Janus is the youngest?"

Remus nodded enthusiastically. "Yep" poping the P, "he was a cute little baby snake! Loved strawberries! The other three didn't like him very much though."

Patton was pressing his palms to his eye sockets. "they burned, beat and tried to kill a child?"

Remus nodded and looked to the ground.

The sides split up to go a few things before Janus woke up again.

When Janus opened his eyes all he could smell was strawberries. A song played in the background. He felt stronger and managed to sit up. He looked on the TV to see a frog singing the loveliest lies of them all.

"Vee! Vee!" Boucing up and down. "Can we watch Over The Garden Wall?" Virgil looked over at the shorter side. "You just watched it yesterday, short stack" even though the yellow side was 15 he still bounced and gave Virgil the puppy dog eyes. Virgil sighed, "Fine. Bring up the episode." trying and failing to sound annoyed. The smaller side smiled even wider.

"Vee?" Janus mumbled under his breathe the name. The side in the memory looked similar to...What was his name? VIRGIL! That was it! Was Vee Virgil? The snake zoned out in his thoughts and the song from the frog. Only to be brought out of it when a light blue side stood in front if him.

"Patton? That was your name right?"

"Yep! You got it in one mr scales!" Patton seemed nice, wait. Scales?

Get out of here you slimy boi! reptilian rapscallion! Snake! Evil! Villian! You are no good for Thomas! Just leave! Leave! LEAVE! LEAVE!

Janus lifted his hand and touched the left side of his face. Smooth scales greeted his hand and old burnt skin next to his eye. Tears started to leak for a reason he couldn't pin point. Continuously touching the scales, stoking over the sharp bottom of scales. Sooner then he thought someone was sitting next to him.

Patton sat next to him and was counting numbers.

1 2 3 4. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Janus didn't know what the numbers where but he followed along anyway.

Soon he could smell the strawberries again. He likes strawberries right? Janus thinks he likes strawberries. When he looks up, Patton gives him a hug. Wincing when his arms touch something on his back.

More and more time passes. With each memory things get clearer. Janus still doesn't know why he can't remember anything. Until another memory happens.

"WILL YOU PLEASE JUST SHUT UP?" " No! Roman I want to apologize! I'm sorry I compared you to your brother! I'm sorry I manipulated you at the courtroom! I'm sorry I sent Remus to deal with my problems! You don't have to forgive me but ay least listen to me!" Roman growls "FUCK OFF!!" And suddenly, he is back at the dark household.

He needs to get out before the others find him. Who knows what they would do to h- "Ohhh Deceit! So lovely for you to stop by~" Too late.

He runs to his room, tripping on the carpet. The lock is broken. He hides in the closet. Wrath finds him. He's dragged to the dark side commons and chained to a wall for days to become the personal punching bad. Apathy set him on fire, Wrath beat him up and Depression.... Depression did something to his head. He was thrown into the gray after depression had his fun. Then he blacked out

Janus doesn't want to leave his room. He's being punished for wanting to apologize. That seems like bullshit to him.

Weeks pass. People keep knocking on his door, they say that they're worried. What a bunch of liars.

After a month, the sides make Thomas take them inside if the bedroom. After a bit of convincing, Janus tells them everything.

And much to his surprise. They are livid.

------

Beep boop. Thingy done! I hope this thing made sense! Brain is broken atm. This one was inspired by Once Upon a December from Anastasia.

This turned out a lot more fluffy then I originally thought.... Hope ya like it! I need to go write a poem now ❤💛❤

protcetive sides alert! yeah! may i say that this is some quality content? im running out of things to say wihout repeating myself but they are all just so amazing and normaly leave me with energy to write stuff. (sorry im responding to these now, i was asleep when i got them last night and consumed by school fr the past few hours...)

[crash-cinematic-universe]

Anyone Who Knows What Love Is Will Understand

pairing: peter maximoff/reader

summary/request: Peter suddenly finds out what the gaping hole in his memory is hiding.

warnings: cheating, angst, language, uh like a teenie tiny mention of sex but like its teenie tiny

notes: which one of you fuckers let me watch Black Mirror, huh? no one asked for this but I feel like shit for not posting yesterday and inspiration struck. also sorry if this is incoherent i didnt edit it and its 2 am

Based off Black Mirror episode 4 season 2, “White Christmas” and the song Anyone Who Knows What Love Is (Will Understand) by Irma Thomas

            Peter was sure he had heard the song before-- the soft, melodic voice of Irma Thomas singing the lyrics to Anyone Who Knows What Love Is. His fingers drummed the beat steadily on his stomach as he waited for you. Peter was laying on the couch, his feet laying on the armrest as he absentmindedly listened to the radio. He smiled as he held a small remote in his hand-- the same remote that controlled the technology behind his eyes. Peter’s thumb flicked the center button, swiping his finger in circles until he accessed his photos. There Peter sat, a dumb, lovestruck smile on his face as he shuffled through photos of you.

            The first photo he studied was from your first date; Peter had taken you to a drive in and you watched Grease. The two of you were humming the tune to Greased Lightning for the next week. Peter could recall the way you lied in the back of Logan’s truck, his jacket wrapped tightly around you to keep you warm. That didn’t stop Peter from using his body heat to warm you too, of course.

            The second photo he stumbled upon was taken at Kurt’s 21st birthday party when you had given Kurt a speech about his accomplishments and how much everyone loved him. The third photo was from the same party, this time being taken by Scott. It was a photo of you and Peter drunkenly making out against a wall. Peter remembered the intoxicated giggles that the pair of you were reduced to after Scott showed you the photo.

            The final photo Peter examined was taken just a few nights ago at a bar you and Peter had visited with Logan and Charles. You were sitting in a dimly lit booth beside Peter, a bright smile on your face. Peter remembers-- actually, Peter can’t remember much from that night. He got drunk fast and the rest of the evening was nothing more than a dark blur, a void of nothingness. He tried shuffling through his memories, but even the tech in his eyes seemed to have failed him. Either that, or he deleted them. Why would he delete them?

            Peter’s thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the front door opening, the jingle of the doorknob somehow snapping Peter out of his trance. The song from before had apparently repeated, but Peter didn’t mind. The silver-haired man got up from his position to greet you at the door, but you had moved from the doorway to the bedroom quite quickly. By the time he reached the bedroom, you were sitting on the bed facing away from him. The air that hung in the room was tense, and the affection that Peter was prepared to give felt oddly inappropriate. 

            Your face was dark, the light in the room casting shadows across your features. Your eyes were trained on the carpet floor, and Peter couldn’t help but notice the pained vacancy behind your pupils. Steadily, your breath came in short bursts. You didn’t look at Peter when he walked in or when he sat next to you. No, your eyes never left the floor.

            “Y/n? Are you okay?” Peter’s voice was hesitant and concerned. You didn’t answer, instead, you took a deep breath.

            “Do you know that feeling when you learn something about someone you love, and it’s so… so terrible that it hurts to love them? That feeling of guilt and hopelessness when you learn that someone you poured your heart and soul into wasn’t who you thought they were? And-.. and you can never look at them the same again?” The sorrow in your voice felt like a punch to Peter’s chest. The truth is, Peter knew that feeling all too well. He didn’t respond, though, realizing that it was a rhetorical question. Your eyes stayed on the floor. “I woke up this morning and I loved you. The night before I fell asleep and I loved you. The entire day before that night I went to work and I trained and I learned and I taught and through all of that I loved you. I love you and I have for as long as I can remember.” You were getting angrier and angrier with every word, but not violent angry. Hurt angry. “Can you say the same?”

            “O-of course I can, babe, what’s wrong?” For the first time your eyes tore away from the floor and met Peter’s, tears threatening to fall. There was something unfamiliar in your eyes and it made Peter so incredibly afraid.

            “Can you?” Your voice is venomous and pained. “Can you really, Peter? Because I don’t think you can.” The song from before was still playing and looping, but neither of you two really cared. 

            “What do you mean? Where is this coming from?” With that, Peter receives a file from you. He scrambles for the remote in his pocket, quickly lighting up his eyes to see whatever caused you such sorrow. It’s an image of Peter and a girl he can’t recognize in an alleyway. For a second, he doesn’t realize what exactly they’re doing, but then it hits him like a train.

            “That image was sent to everyone. Every single fucking person I’ve ever interacted with knows that my boyfriend is a--” You cut yourself off. Even after all this, you still care for him and you don’t want to hurt him. “Why, Peter? Why?” 

            Peter couldn’t respond. He was still staring blankly at the photo desperately trying to make sense of everything. The gap in his memory-- that must be what this is. Peter was feeling so many things at once, but he mostly felt embarrassed and cowardly. Instead of dealing with whatever this was, he deleted the memory-- seemingly hoping that it would simply disappear. He flicked the remote and the image disappeared, leaving Peter to sit and process the information he was just given. Unfortunately for him, his girlfriend wanted answers as to why he was screwing someone that wasn’t her in an alley.

            “I…” Peter said softly. He didn’t want to admit it, but Peter knew he had to. “I wiped it.”

            “You what?” You were in disbelief. Of course, you understood the logic behind wiping it, but you never thought Peter could be so… so cowardly.

            “I wiped the memory. I can’t-- I don’t know what happened. I must’ve wanted to, uh, let it go.” Peter expected outrage, he expected harsh words or tears or shouting-- all of those things well-deserved, but they never came. You didn’t scream or shout or lash out. You just laughed. You laughed a humorless, dry laugh, and it took Peter a minute to realize your uncontrollable laughter was meshed with an onslaught of sobbing. 

            “You-- you wanted to let it go,” you laughed. Peter started crying, knowing what was coming. “You wanted to let it go.”

            “I know that was stupid and fucking cowardly-- I would take it back if I could and I am so, so sorry, for everything.” Peter pleaded. Your laughter came to a slow stop, leaving the tears in its wake.

            “You wanna know something ironic? I would’ve trusted you more if you kept the memories.” you sniffled. “You wanna know why? Because then I would be sure that you didn’t mean it. That it wasn’t 100% your fault. But I can’t be sure, not now, because you don’t remember. You can’t tell me if you meant it because you don’t know.” You stand up and Peter cries harder as you walk away from him. He’s quick to follow you, reaching out for your warm embrace. Peter is ready to beg, to fall to his knees and beg for your forgiveness. 

            “Maybe you were right. Maybe we both need to… to let things go.” You walk over to the man in front of you, pulling him into a tight hug. He clings to you, his tears soaking your shirt-- you’re crying, too. Peter didn’t know you were holding your remote until it was too late. With the flick of your finger, you were reduced to nothing more than a bumbling blur. Your picture-perfect features that Peter loved were gone, leaving nothing in their wake. The comforting sound of your voice that made Peter feel warm and safe were replaced by a deep gurgling gibberish. You-- or, your silhouette, grabbed your jacket and walked out the door. Peter was alone, the only sound breaking the silence other than his heartbroken crying was the melodic sound of Irma Thompson’s voice.

I know to ever let you go

Oh, it’s more than I could ever stand

Oh but,

Anyone who knows what love is will understand