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abronzeagegod · 10 months ago

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Dead Letters, Missing Wife

Dead Letter #0 & 1 Marriage Certificate and 'Come Find Me'

[a cleaned up and longer version of this post and prompt]

You had just turned 18 over the weekend. Reaching the age of majority or whatever. Sunday birthdays are whatever, you have the day off of school and responsibilities but the looming threat of Monday hangs over the entire day.

At least with this Monday you have the joy of looking forward to belated birthday letters and things being delivered to you since the mail doesn't go on Sundays.

Sure enough after school there was a small stack of letters for you.

Grandma, aunts, uncles, your one weird cousin that lives in the mountains.

All birthday wishes and greetings. I was nice.

Then there was a large, thick envelope that said, "Department of Recognition, Vows, and Contracts."

You carefully tear along the edge of the large envelope and open it. Two things are there. One is something that looks like what you imagine your eventual college diploma would look like. Thick, impressive paper that almost feels laminated, some kind of fun calligraphy across it. There was also a piece of paper.

The paper was forgotten about at first.

The certificate, was a marriage certificate. For you and your first crush, your best friend at 6 years old, Siobhan.

There was your name and Siobhan Winters.

"This certificate recognizes the wedding vows exchanged between these two parties as complete and binding upon the youngest reaching their age of majority."

The memories come flooding back. You hadn't thought of Siobhan in years. Hell, you haven't even seen them in twice as long.

You were a demanding six year old. It was something about you that you were just adamant that this was how things were and how they were supposed to be. And seeing Siobhan, a cute little kid with long blonde hair that was so blonde it was almost white, big green eyes, and just this quiet demeanor to everyone but you, of course she was the one that you figured out what the terms "crush" and "fall in love" and everything meant. Those words were just words, descriptions of parents and grandparents and why they were together for so long, but Siobhan was the person that made the definition real and gave it tangibility and form for you.

She was your best friend but that wasn't quite enough for you at six years old. You dragged her to the pond out back of the neighborhood. The pond was on the edge of a small wood, really nothing more than a copse of trees and wilderness in the suburban sprawl, but it felt like a great and terrible wood when you were that small.

You donned a veil because there was something Traditional, and Correct, about hiding your face from your best friend/crush. You didn't have a ring but you did spend your allowance on candy at the corner shop, and in your haul were two candy rings.

There were somethings about weddings that you know, but you don't know much.

You know there was a veil, that was very important. You know there were rings. You know there were vows and witnesses.

There were vows, you know that for a fact. You just can't quite remember, now, what they were. Siobhan said them with such gravitas and meaning and weight to them that you still feel the shivers up your spine when you think about it.

The frogs were your witnesses.

The ring pops were the binding rings, exchanged with words of devotion.

Siobhan lifted your veil, and pulled you into a hug.

As far as the two of you were concerned, you were married!

The frogs croaked in happiness.

Apparently, the Department of Recognition, Vows, and Contracts also thought that the marriage was real. And as the younger of the two, you were the last one to reach the age of majority, and the marriage certificate was mailed to you.

As if that answered any questions.

The nostalgia calls after you and you want to remember Siobhan as they were and not the hazy memories of childhood.

You immediately start digging through your old year books, or whatever the grade school equivalent of a year books was.

It was only then that you recall that Siobhan never made it to picture day in kindergarten.

Nor did she make it to picture day the year after, or the year after, or any year until she moved away in sixth grade.

Puzzled, intrigued, and now even more confused, you head downstairs where you find your mom working hard on a crossword puzzle.

"Hey, what's a four letter word for black and white?" she asks.

"Oreo," you answer without really thinking about it. "Hey, do you remember my friend Siobhan? From kindergarten and grade school?"

Your mom finishes filling in your answer, looking pleased with herself for having most of the puzzle finished. "Was that the weird one with the cape and the glasses?"

"No, that was Steph."

"Oh yeah, she really loved random trivia, didn't she?"

"Yup."

"Siobhan was the one that was always looking for dinosaur bones in everyone's backyard?"

"That's Joel. No, Siobhan. She came over all the time, we would go play in the backyard, and went to the park together like every day. You didn't like her dad like at all. One day after kindergarten I demanded that I was gonna make her my wife and did a little ceremony out by the pond."

"Oh! Right!" Your mom looks up at you, lost in memory for a second. "Lived across the street, wild black hair, always asked if we had Cheetos."

"No. Mom. That was Matt. Siobhan. Cute kid, always seemed to be the smallest kid in class. Green eyes that had a look you called 'an old soul with the million yard stare'. Platinum blonde hair that was almost grey in a very long braid all the time."

Your mom makes eye contact with you but she doesn't seem to see you. "You never had a friend like that," she says in a strange, almost monotone.

Confused and a little weirded out, you decide to drop it, and head back up to your room. If you mom wasn't going to help you then perhaps the internet would. You don't like to brag, but you're extremely adept at Facebook stalking and finding people.

One time, at your part time job over the summer, you had a really weird coworker that you only knew for three days, lied about almost everything, and then was fired for being outrageously high on the clock. They claimed that they were getting a job in a small town in Alaska as a Fire Marshall and promptly disappeared.

All you had to find them was their first name and the fact that they worked at the same place you did for a very short amount of time.

It took you only a couple of days to find them. They did not move to Alaska, they went one town over and bounced around between barbacking jobs and running a mildly successful etsy shop.

So you use all the skills that you possess and try to reach out to all sorts of people to find someone with a shared memory of Siobhan. Friends, teachers, people you shared classes with that you'd rather never speak to again.

Every. Single. Response. "You never had a friend like that."

This went from being some weird, intriguing mystery, to something vaguely sinister, and deeply creepy.

No one seemed to remember Siobhan except for you. You remember them now, perfectly. Your first crush. The first person you ever developed feelings for, as real and as deep as any 6 year old possibly could develop.

You remember her vividly. Hugging her was the best. She was shy and didn't like to be touched too much, so when she did let you hug her it was the best. It was like hugging a piece of glass. Sharp, beautiful, and fragile. You always felt that if you hugged her too tightly she was shatter.

There was no way you could let this rest now. No way that you could let this end now.

You call the government office that issued you the certificate of marriage. Or at least. You tried to contact the government office.

The website listed no such department, neither locally nor federally.

You called city hall and they transferred you to a dead line.

Out of desperation you called the post office to see where the letter came from.

"Hello," you say for the fifth time this particular call after being transferred too many times. "I was hoping that you could help me track down who sent me a letter and not transfer me to someone else. I received a marriage certificate with my name and information but I can't find anyone who would have sent this to me, the department seemingly doesn't exist."

The deep, bored, and phlegmy voice asked simply, "And your spouse?"

"Siobhan Winters, I can't find any record of her either!" you say, perhaps too loudly, but your frustration is overwhelming you.

"Oh. You got a dead letter. Undeliverable since Siobhan Winters ain't here. But if your her spouse w can send you all the stuff we got sitting here for her. Do you accept?"

"Yes! Wait. What? What do you mean?"

"Everything will be delivered to you in the next two to three business days, thank you for contacting the Dead Letter Office. You have a pleasant day."

You couldn't do anything else before he hung up. You stare at the phone for a while before putting it down.

All you can do is wait for the dead letters to make it to you.

When the letters finally arrived there were boxes full. At least six boxes full of mail, and a few packages. It would take you, by rough estimate, at least three days to go through it all. Even if half of it was spam mail, it would take forever.

But on top of one of the boxes that you just found outside your front door, seemingly delivered before the sun rose, was a letter. It was addressed to you, sort of.

"To the spouse of Siobhan Winters"

That was you, by all accounts.

The letter was sealed with wax, and seemingly made out of heavy parchment, like some kind of ancient letter.

You opened it first.

"To my love,

I fear I must apologize for a great many things. I never wished to abandon you or break our vows, but there are actions I must take, deeds that must be done, purposes I must fulfill. If you have found this, found me, then I am sure you have many questions.

If you must search me out, then you can find my trail starting at our favorite place.

I love you still. I love you forever.

I still remember our vows and will endeavor to never corrupt or break them.

Please find me.

I miss you.

I need you.

I am so afraid.

Yours till the end of time,

Siobhan Winters"

You carefully fold the letter, and hold it close to you for a second.

It seems like you have to go out and find your wife.

You bring all the boxes inside, carefully put them in your bedroom where space is already running low. Your parents, barely awake and carefully sipping coffee watch you with mild confusion and interest.

"Everything good?" your dad asked as you carried in the last box.

"Mix up with the post office. A bunch of unsent mail finally made it my way," you half explain.

"Ok..."

With all of the boxes in your room you start to unpack and sort them.

There were hundreds if not thousands of spam mail for Siobhan. It seems that the only people that remember her are you and the person in charge of trying to sell HelloFresh boxes.

There seemed to be four serious piles of mail by the time that you finish sorting all six boxes.

The first pile, the biggest one, was spam mail. The one inexhaustible truth in the universe.

They were all addressed to Siobhan Winters, but seemingly were listed under a couple dozen addresses all over the country. There was something there, a code or a pattern in Siobhan's movements. But you don't quite have the brain power to think that one through.

The second pile were bills. None of them were overdue, but just notices for the stopping and starting of service. This felt like a pattern too, one that you could combine with the spam mail to really track where Siobhan had been over the course of the years she's been gone.

But that wasn't the important thing, yet.

Because the third and forth piles were much more interesting, and they were all addressed to "The Spouse of Siobhan Winters".

There were letters, all extremely similar to the first one you opened, all addressed the same, all sealed similarly.

Then there were packages. They were of various sizes but most of them were pretty small.

This was a mystery and an adventure, so you wanted to start at the end. Find Siobhan right away and then work through the rest.

After carefully looking over each letter you see that there were small numbers written on the back of each letter and package, right near the seal.

You couldn't make out the exact details of the seal in the dark purple wax, but you realize that it was probably a tower of some kind with some squiggly line accents.

The last letter, one with the number 60 on it, was the highest one you found, so you opened that one first.

Answers to start, adventure later.

"My love,

There is an order and a reason for this. It may be difficult, and it may change you in ways that you cannot see or predict. I say this now, here, that the road is long and difficult, for the better and the worse, and the changes are fundamental and total and incomprehensible until you go through it.

I do not want to discourage you from this journey.

I want you to be prepared.

You cannot remain, the act of searching has already started and changed you. There is no going back.

If you stop I would not blame you, nor would I intrude upon the peace you would inevitably seek and find. I would weep for the loss.

If you do wish to continue, you must know that there is an order, a reason, and a pattern to the journey. You cannot jump to the end, even though I recall you desperately reading the last chapters of books in school because you needed to know if there was a happy ending. This is not a story you can skip to the end.

I'm sorry.

The journey will be long and will alter everything for you. In the end there will be a choice, for you to make alone.

I'm sorry that all you have of me are these dead letters. But if you follow them in order, if you undergo the journey with me, after me, you will understand.

Yours for all time,

Siobhan"

You close the letter and sit on your bed.

After all this time she still remembers you so clearly it seemed. You still look up the plot summary of movies and TV shows before you start watching them. You'll spoil yourself left and right on things to make sure that they aren't going to end badly or not be worth the time investment.

It seems that this is not something that you can skip to the end of, this is a journey that you will have to take from the beginning.

There were so many letters and packages.

And you had a feeling that many of these things would have you going to wildly different places.

You grab your bag, stuff in some snacks and a bottle of water, and grab letter number 2.

If this is how it has to be, then you're going to start walking to the old pond where the two of you got married in kindergarten.

i have a kofi

#dead letters missing wife #i have some ideas going forward but before i went further i had to double back and clean some stuff up #work has also been killing me so time is precious #i'm working on like 4 other writing projects at the same time too #my fiction #writeblr #writers on tumblr

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thegeminisage · 3 months ago

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star trek update time. last night we watched ds9's "favor the bold" and "sacrifice of angels."

favor the bold:

worf rescuing dax during these wartime bits is EXTREMELY sweet. i think this is like 2 or 3 times now? he loves her 🥺

i love all the big cgi shots of all the different ships...i feel like i could look at those forever just noticing the various differences

quark in this episode......................

quark e kira in charge of breaking rom out. quark/kira. QUARK/KIRA! odo who? he sucks. fuck odo.

i don't mean it. i'm actually going to try as hard as i can to forgive him because it would be too exhausting to hate him until the end of the series. but FUCK ODO!!! kira doesn't need him...quark is right there...

like, odo being busy in his room fucking the mommy changeling or whatever while rom was in JAIL and kira and odo weren't allowed to see him!!!! fuck off

THE BRIG SCENE???? where rom my king rom was like. like quark was fucking. TRYING TO COMFORT HIM? and rom was just like. brother you cannot save me from execution you've got to focus on saving everyone else first. and quark was like what the fuck is wrong with you. and then proceeded to save everyone else first???

AND THEN. HE FOOLED? DAMAR? INTO THINKING HE WAS ON HIS SIDE?

kira was also in amazing form this episode. first of all, her fucking beating damar to a pulp and daring him to do anything about it. her getting ziyal to finally turn on her dad. and most of all telling odo to sit on it and spin. literally go fuck your mother. she's amazing

nog!!! nog's little promotion. wah. about time.

sacrifice of angels:

WORMHOLE ALIENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm actually really nervous about it cuz sisko was like bajor is my home when i retire when i go home it's gonna be to bajor and they were like you will never find peace in bajor :)

it was still really cool to see them again though. i'm fucking obsessed

and like...imagine being kira, or any bajoran. and you work with sisko for five years and he's like man cmon im not jesus. stop treating me like im jesus. i dont believe in that shit. and then he goes into the wormhole to face down 2800 enemy ships and vaporizes them with his mind. buddy you're not beating the jesus allegations anytime soon or like ever

QUARK IN THIS EPISODE ALSO. everything up to him because everyone else got thrown in jail for being rom sympathizers. him kidnapping ziyal for help was brilliant. they made a good team for .5 seconds. i love also that he 1. murdered two guys 2. freaked the fuck out about it, which is exactly what he did in that one episode with the klingon lady

also, QUARK E KIRA!!!! "i'd kiss you quark but" NO! KISS HIM!!!!!!!!!!

ziyal......girl, rip. she got there in the end i guess. but holy shit, i didn't realize damar had it in him. if im being honest im glad they killed her and not rom, it looked dangerously close to heading that way i know i checked up on him on memory alpha but STILL

what was really fun about it was dukat snapping. that wasn't where i saw his arc going but him totally losing it and then giving sisko back the baseball vs sisko triumphantly taking the baseball back...wow. that prop held so much weight over these 6 episodes and i was wondering how it was gonna pay off and it paid off REAL good

odo's change of heart.....................................

look. in theory, i LOVE him having a struggle and coming down on the side of the federation because of, primarily, kira. i just think his "betrayal" came out of nowhere, he was instantly telling this mommy changeling all his deepest secrets and then linking with her without any lead up or build up. if he had been struggling beforehand, if he had still been human and wanted it taken away from him, this i would understand. but his "betrayal" had no meat to it, so his change of heart doesn't feel very meaningful either. so like i want to care but i don't.

that said, when she asked why he changed his mind and he said "i think you know the answer" that was. pretty good. that was pretty good. it makes me hopeful that odo and i can get past this very rough place in our relationship :(

TONIGHT: finally back to voyager to catch up on all the voyager we skipped to watch ds9 three nights in a row. we got "day of honor" and "nemesis," for realsies this time

#personal #star trek blogging #ds9 lb

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imagoddamnonionmason · 4 months ago

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For jodie and woods

Pre- relationship

2 and 4

General

Domestic life

5 and 6

HONK

HONK!! My friend! Kings! ^u^

Pre Relationship

2. what was their first impression of each other?

So, I'll start with Jodie and then Frank.

When she first met Frank, when they first spoke and introduced themselves, Jodie noted the air about it. She gained a sense of "fuck around and find out". He's a no-nonsense person, focused soldier, with years of tactical and combative experience. She knew, when looking at him, that he had got the reputation he had for a reason.

His eyes also left a lasting impression on her, how they watched her carefully, cooly, and the sharp edge that almost dared her to say something stupid, ask why he and Mason were there. Or at least, that's what she felt. She also made a mental note to ignore the feeling in her chest. Like, it wasn't love at first sight or anything, but she definitely acknowledge he was handsome.

So, the short version is, Jodie's memory of her first impression of him was how good he looked but also how unnerved she was in his presence (it's Frank, he doesn't really like working with new people so he was about to jump and dance and make buddies).

For Frank, his first impression actually came from like... watching her from a distance. He was being explained who she was by Adler, as he and Mason had just arrived at the safe house, and she was sat at her desk, pouring over the data from the encrypted floppy disk. Her pencil was scribbling furiously, fingers of her left hand tapping agitatedly on the surface of the table. He couldn't really see her face, at first, but he could tell with how hunched over she was, that she'd been sat working at the spot for quite a while. Not to mention the amount of empty paper cups stained with coffee gave away that notion, too.

Then, Adler had called to her, introduced her, and she stuck her hand out stiffly. He took it, regarding her apprehensively, eyes flickering narrowed as he took in her dishevelled, tired appearance. He got the impression that she was working herself into the ground and that she hadn't slept in days.

Despite her agitation, her stiff body language, he noted something else about her - a distant look in her eyes, something unsettled.

She reminded him of someone, but he shook that thought away, putting it down to how tired she looked.

4. Who felt romantic feelings first?

Frank. He actually accepted his feelings first, too; Jodie put those emotions deep down somewhere for a little while longer, but Frank came to the realisation first. I think Jodie just didn't trust what she was feeling and it took her a bit to allow her body to feel something romantic.

General

7. who takes the lead in social situations?

Frank! So, because of what Jodie has been through, she's very hesitant to approach people. Frank also has that protective streak, wants to make sure she doesn't have deal with any more shit.

Later on in their relationship, this does level out and it does depend on the context as to which one will take the lead.

Domestic Life

5. Who's the stricter parent?

AAAAAHH this is tough. Jodie, though, would be the stricter parent. But it's not strictness for the sake of strictness, it comes from a place of deep-seated protection that stems from fear. As Ashley grows up, she'd chill out a little bit.

Guaranteed, though, Ashley could ask "hey, Mom, can I go out tonight with some friends?"

"No."

She'd then go to Frank.

"Hey, Dad-"

"What did your Mom say?"

Ashley can whittle him down though and sometimes Frank relents. How can he not?

6. who worries the most?

Jodie - again, I think it comes from her past and her fear that it'll turn into a full blown haunting (which it does in the form of Keith!)

#gooseanswers #thank you for the ask Kings!#woods/bell oc #frank woods #jodie hall #call of duty #black ops cold war #cod bell oc #bocw oc #Ashley woods

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ehlenvs3000w24 · 9 months ago

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History and Interpretation (BLOG 6)

Hello and welcome back to my nature blog! This week I have done some thinking on history and how things of the past can be interpreted. When we think of history, we think of the great stories and background behind artifacts that are left over. However, without interpretation, these artifacts that unpack tales of the past would simply be items or really old landscapes. In nature, history allows the information about land, the species it holds, and the people that use it to be conveyed and be used in many ways. History in nature allows local communities to share their past, gives cultural richness, and helps scientific research study the land for important preservation or monitoring rising issues like climate change.

"There is no peculiar merit in ancient things, but there is merit in integrity, and integrity entails the keeping together of the parts of any whole, and if these parts are scattered throughout time, then the maintenance of integrity entails a knowledge, a memory, of ancient things. …. To think, feel or act as though the past is done with, is equivalent to believing that a railway station through which our train has just passed, only existed for as long as our train was in it."

(Edward Hyams, Chapter 7, The Gifts of Interpretation)

In this quote shared as this week's prompt, it seems Edward Hyams dives into the meaning of interpretation in the context of preserving history. He starts by introducing the merit of artifacts, in which he describes what I had mentioned: without a story and someone to debunk the history and an honest background, historical artifacts have little to no worth. The mention of ancient things acknowledges the importance of remembering the history of a place or artifact and how they contribute to the present. This is extremely applicable when talking about nature's history as historical landscapes and ecosystems are all formed by their long evolution over time. These evolutionary processes are important to be understood through interpretation to debunk how species, the climate, and the earth came to be. The last part of the quote uses a train station analogy to describe the importance of memory. This analogy describes that the past isn't simply something to be discarded or ignored. Just because an event is past, doesn't mean that it wasn't significant to the present or future. I think Hyams quote also can describe how disregarding historical events that “only existed for as long as our train was in it”, creates struggle in using natural history for conservation. The historical aspects of nature continue to influence the future and we can't forget about the past as there may be great clues to drivers of change currently in ecosystems. For example, cycles of lower temperatures like the ice ages and warmer interglacial periods are all elements of environmental history that have allowed scientists to study the earth's climate and predict the natural waves of temperature versus human impact. Interpretation also keeps historical culture alive and teaches younger generations about having a relationship with nature. An example of this is how Indigenous communities keep their ancestors' history alive for cultural reasons and use stories to convey the importance of certain natural features or landscapes for spirituality (Beck et al., 2018, p.341).

It is extremely important to remember history. This makes interpreters especially important as their role is to keep the integrity of history alive and not forgotten (Beck et al., 2018, p.326). With this, preserving history can be a driver of change for the future having a huge impact on scientific research and cultural practice. Without acknowledging and remembering the past, these "trains" of history will be lost.

Resources

Beck, L., Cable, T. T., & Knudson, D. M. (2018). Interpreting Cultural and Natural Heritage: For a Better World (pp. 81–102). Sagamore Publishing LLC. https://sagamore.vitalsource.com/books/9781571678669

#envs3000 #nature #history

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pancake-breakfast · 1 year ago

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When I said I wasn't ready for this to end on my last post I didn't intend to then not post until the weekend, but somehow using TriMax to try and soothe my JJK feels didn't seem like a good idea, so here we are.

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 14, Chapters 4-6 below.

Chapter 4: Never Give Up! Never Surrender!

CW: Blood (in color)

This honestly seems like an odd title given how suicidal our main character is, but let's run with it. Maybe it's referring more to the Earth Fleet.

Vash, asking important questions.

WTF, why is dead Legato just standing there screaming? Like, yes, I get that him standing around screaming in an unsettling fashion is totally in character for him, but... he's dead, yeah? Or... is it Vash screaming? I mean, I feel like screaming is generally the appropriate response to Legato showing up.

What the...? Surprise Wolfwood. He looks in pretty good spirits for a dead man.

Dang, that's a lot of ghosts.

OMG it's REM.

Wait, is he dying? Like, I know he's dying, but is he dying dying??

Oh, he hit a wall between him and them. He must not be quite gone yet. But gods, his hair looks fully black here.

Oh, wait. It has just a bit of lightness in it still.

Vashie looks sooooo tired.

Meanwhile, humanity is trying its very, very best to communicate with the Plants Knives has absorbed.

Ooh, looks like the Plants are forming Opinions.

That's a big boom.

Oooh, critical failure for Earth Fleet.

The good news is Knives and/or the Plants he's merged with just saved all of Humanity on Noman's Land. The bad news is everyone still has to deal with Knives.

Hahahahaha, this kind of spirit is the soul of Trigun. Thanks, girls.

You're right, Meryl. It's absolutely too heavy a burden for him to carry alone. I hope he knows you feel that way. And not just you, but so many others, too. I hope he's at a place where he can accept that.

Wait, what cracked Meryl's helmet?

Eyyy, Vash is conscious again!

Chapter 5: Ticket to the Future

Where's he stuck? Limbo?

Ahhhhh! He heard Meryl's words!

Oop, feather to the face for Vash, too.

I like how he calls himself Vash the Stampede in his head. Not Vash. Vash the Stampede. You have to say the whole thing.

I still don't know what the hell he caught, if anything.

Dang, Knives isn't even gonna bother slaughtering the humans. He's just gonna leave them to rot.

What is that noise, Knives? Is it maybe your sisters? Are they now making their noise un-ignorable?

Were you really united? Did you ever actually check with them? Or did you just assimilate and assume that because the assimilation took, they were in agreeance?

It's not just Vash at this point, though, is it?

Wait, is Vash gonna plug into Knives? Ohhhh, he does not look enthusiastic about this move.

Sooooo much giant Plant underboob.

Oh, Vash is going to plug himself into the connection they've set up to try and talk with the Plants. That's hella dangerous. Has he ever been plugged into anything before? What if he can't maintain his sense of self in there? Though I guess Chronica could when she plugged into Domina... but that was only a fraction of the entity Vash is gonna jump into, and the entity he's gonna jump into includes Knives.

Hahahaha, I feel like Knives telling Vash not to touch him is exactly the fuel Vash needs. Big sibling energy here.

This looks distinctly unpleasant for the both of them.

Everyone's screaming for ice cream here.

Eyyyy, the giant fused entity is dissolving! Presumably into feathers.

Yyyup. Feathers. Weird-shaped feathers.

Wait, is Vash falling?

More screaming, but this time in Japanese.

LOL, it's not tenacity but recklessness. Fair. This is Vash we're talking about.

I feel like I keep saying this, but Knives doesn't look so good.

I keep saying that about Vash, too, but it continues to be true.

All these freaking feathers. I'm STILL blaming CLAMP for this.

Chapter 6: Mind Games

Memories for everyone!

Yeah, Meryl's allowed to panic a bit when she gets inundated with foreign memories again.

But look at her, doing her best to stay focused. She knows Vash is at his limit and she's doing her best to support him.

UGH, HE CAN FEEL HER EMOTIONS!!! HE CAN FEEL THEM!!!! That there's a rare genuine Vash smile. He may not know if it's gonna work, but he's so grateful for her effort and support. He's glad she's here for him right now.

This is a Thing. Everything dissolves when communication ends. When there's no more room for it, whatever the reason may be.

Heh, they call Vash "Red Brother." I approve. I think he'd like that.

Love and Peace, yo.

They're leaving Knives.

I bet in Stampede, if they get this far, everything will dissolve into flowers. That is NOT LESS CLAMP-LIKE.

Ooof, there's just a mess of bulb-less plants lying everywhere now. That seems dangerous for them.

This guy doing what he can to communicate via a feather. I approve.

This scene. I love this scene. I love the tenderness of his touch on the one Plant's head. I love how he changes his words from a statement of fact, a demand and a command, to a desperate request. I love her smiling peacefully through her tears.

Vash is up and on his feet!

WHAT IS THIS?!?! WHAT IS THIS PROMISE THAT HE'S NEVER MADE BEFORE?!?! WHAT IS THIS WILL TO LIVE AND TO COME BACK AND TO SPEND TIME WITH SOMEONE HE CARES ABOUT INSTEAD OF RUNNING AND RUNNING AND HIDING AND ISOLATING??!?! WHAT. IS. THIS?!!?!?!?

After watching Stampede, I read somewhere that someone was saying how those who were familiar with the series were gonna have fun explaining to Stampede-onlies how Knives getting destroyed in July is just him being dramatic. Looking at him missing HUGE CHUNKS of his body and yet still somehow maintaining his basic shape, I can't help but think he's being dramatic again.

"My head's killing me." You don't say? Maybe it's because HALF OF IT IS MISSING?? What a freaking dork.

I... honestly don't know if what Vash is aiming for here is something that can be defined as "freedom."

Howwww can there only be two chapters left??? [insert panicked hyperventilating]

Chapter Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6

Archive Intermission for Formatting Reasons!

Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5 + Bonus || Vol. 9: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 10: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-8 || Vol. 11: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 12: Covers + 1-3, 4-6, 7-9 || Vol. 13: Covers + 1-3, 4-6, 7-9 || Vol. 14: Covers + 1-3

Extra Credit Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt. 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack || Vol. 9: Justice, Punishment, and Mercy, The Tolling of an Iron Bell || Vol. 10: Crucifixion Symbology (pt. 2 of post), Merging of Families, Being Childlike (And Why God Hates Chapel) || Vol. 11: New Hair, New Outlook

#trigunbookclub #trigun maximum #volume 14 #pancake thoughts

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emeritus-fuckers · 10 months ago

Note

For the match up event please 💙

1. Identify as a cis woman. Use she/her pronouns and am panromantic aceflux. Call me Piff.

2. I would like to be paired with one of the Papa's please!

3. I'm about 5'5" and am plus-sized. I have long unkempt dark blonde hair. It's nearly longer than my back and I kind of just let it do whatever. Blue eyes and thin rounded square glasses. I wear a lot of dull/muted colors and my style is very grunge. Most of my clothes are baggy as well as I feel very constricted in form fitting wear.

4. I'm incredibly standoffish and shy. Very anxious to try anything new and I like routine. I don't talk a whole lot and am more observant- very sensitive to the world around me. Whenever I have the ability to stay in and in bed I take it. Bit of a pushover, particularly around angrier people as I don't have the bravery nor energy to stand up for myself. Once I feel safe around someone I'm a completely different person. Goofy. Cynical. Laid-back and a little lazy. I have quite the temper and allow myself to get angry and irritated around them. I need someone who can handle my harshness.

I also have quiet BPD and my moods can flip drastically in a second over anything or for no particular reason at all. I can make rash and reckless decisions.

5. I'm a huge sucker for anything horror, whether that be watching, reading or playing a video game about it.

Obsessed with cats, am frequently called the crazy cat lady by family. I have a beautiful bombay named Dot who's just as standoffish, anxious and aggressive as me. Would love if she's able to bond with you because she also feels safe.

I listen to a lot older rock when not listening to Ghost. Scorpions, Blue Oyster Cult, Ratt.

In my spare time I like being lazy. Watching TV and screwing around on my phone. I'm a waitress and am very exhausted and sore by the end of every shift- so I just enjoy doing nothing. I do occasionally like to get out and will follow, even if it's for groceries.

6. I love those shitty unhinged Garfield comics. Will laugh at them for hours.

I love the ocean. Surround myself with memories and decor of the few times I was able to visit it.

This post is part of the 1000 followers match up event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your match is...Papa Emeritus II

With you being so shy he was confused at first why you didn't approach him. He realises he needs to open up a little to you, so you can see he isn't really that scary and grumpy. He is actually very caring and loving, he too also has a fun goofy side that people only see when he's at parties unless they are close to him.

He can deal with your harshness, he understands it's you being comfortable around him. He is also very good at standing up for himself and other people. If someone is being angry towards you he will be at your side in seconds looking incredibly intimidating. No one will ever bother you again.

He's really supportive when it comes to your BPD. He'll do anything he can to help when your mood flips. If you make any decisions you regret or want to change he will 100% support you to do that. It's amazing what Secondo and his Ghouls can pull off.

Secondo enjoys reading as well. He loves sitting on the sofa with you in his arms, each of you lost in your own book. He is just so content to know you are there next to him. He also loves painting, as a suprise he painted you in a scene from your favourite book.

If you need to let off steam he'll take you for a walk round the gardens, they are the most calming and soothing place in the Ministry. He'll listen as much as you need, and do what he can to help.

He'll buy you anything you want. He notices your love of horror and buys the best sound system and TV he can find. He sets it all up in his living quaters. He had a spare room that wasn't really being used. He gets the most comofrtable sofa for you to sit on and when you are watching films there together (or you can go there by yourself whenever you want) he makes sure there is fresh popcorn and drinks.

He also takes you on trips to the ocean whenever he can. He'll pay for and arrange everything so you can just go and be by the ocean with nothing to worry about.

Written by Nyx

#classiccatlady #match up #match up event #Secondo #Secondo x reader #papa emeritus ii #papa emeritus ii x reader

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hornet-best-bug · 6 months ago

Note

Could you tell us more about your oc onto which you doodled horns? (Btw, full permission to infodump everything you want about them)

OH MY GOD NO-ONE REALLY ASKS ME TO INFODUMP OTHER THAN ONE PERSON ON HERE AND MY PARTNER. HOLD ON ESSAY INCOMING

Her name is Revive V Regor, and the idea was based off of Pavooko's Void angel idea. (Its warframe related. I fucking love warframe.) The idea was in simple terms "what if, in this AU of warframe, she broke her deal with the man in the wall, and he in retaliation removed her memories of everything and sent her onto the Zarimen derelict, while also leaving her vunerable to the lure of the angels song"

Most of that AU isn't cannon to her true character, and i only have the premise of that AU drafted as a short story you can find on my blog somewhere 😅 so i'll ramble about her cannon self in an alternate AU me and my partner work on together.

Revive was an experiment of Tyl Regor and Alad V ( the community calls Alad "Salad V" a lot, which i think is funny) in an attempt to see whether combining corpus genetics and grineer genetics would stop clone rot. (Clone rot is where grineer clone slowly deteriorate, it's a mutation in the genetics that causes their bodies to essentially "rot" killing them. Hence the name "Clone rot" it formed from years of cloning clones of clones, so on so forth)

Revive was only created successfully on the fith and final attempt, as Alad didn't really fully understand how the cloning process worked. Alad at the time was also recovering from his infestation (cannonially we, the tenno helped him, however for the sake of this au and the fact that we ship Alad and Tyl, Tyl is the one who helps Alad) so Revive does have some dormant infestated genetics, which was what was hoped to stop the clone rot.

Revive went through most of her childhood with her two crazy dads, though she didn't see Alad too much. Revive lived in the grineer Sea Labs a majority of the time, sometimes staying at Alads if Tyl needed her out of the way for a bit.

Revive as a kid was one of those "gifted kids" but she wasn't from the start ever using it for things people would deem "good" rather, she found an innate attraction towards weaponry, particularly explosives. Younger Revive having been so obsessed with grenades and bombs, was given a bomb plushie for her sixth birthday.

At 6, while she was logic smart, she still had a very creative side, often doodling plans for a gun she wanted to make, which ended up being the MK-1 of Firecracker. She liked to play games where she was the bad guy terrorising a city, when she met the man in the wall. He'd taken an interest in her potential for havoc, and so, after introducing himself and making her think he was some "imaginary friend" he made a deal with her. Now keeping in mind she'd around 6-8 at this time. Logic is escaping her because she thinks this is all part of the little roleplay.

The deal was of immorality to everything minus clone-rot as that's her achilies heel, although, wally (wally = the man in the wall) himself is another weakness as she ended up owing him her soul.

At 9 years old, with careful supervision and very limited resources to keep her safe, was allowed to make the MK-1 of Firecracker, her custom grenade launcher that packs quite a punch while sending out live grenades.

After that deal, she continued to play with him, and eventually, once she hit her teenage years, stopped seeing him, and frankly, isn't able to recall much of her childhood.

She, at around 13-16, started making a new, improved version of Firecracker, commandeering corpus weaponry that Alad gave her when she asked to study their reactors. She took apart a reactor she thought would work until she could do the maths for the correct formula for the custom reactor, and managed to make a semi-decent version of her gun. Though she wasn't fully satisfied, with the limited resources she was allowed, it was a decent start and a huge upgrade from the one she made at 9.

Through these years, Tyl and Alad would often have debates on where Revive should live. Should she remain in grineer territory, which at this point is all she knows, or should Alad take her to Corpus territory in hopes of giving her a life that Tyl knows he can't give.

They eventually came to an agreement of alternating where Revive stays. Two weeks at the labs and two weeks at Alads, rinse and repeat.

Revive has so many siblings, but the ones that have names are Kahl-175 (He is a cannon character you meet him in the new war and get to pkay as him in his own quest called Veilbreaker) Virmek and Gant. Gant is the youngest of the trio, and is very attatched to his technically little sister Revive. However, Gant is a manic, so he is tiny and childish, hence revive considers him a little brother instead.

At 14 Revive found herself developing clone rot, and started to conceal it from Tyl and Alad, though it eventually in her adult hood is discovered after tyl finds her bleeding through a very bad bandaging job.

She eventually gets a job in corupus territory, though she dislikes her boss, who is a total dick. She doesn't really get paid much despite her work demanding a higher wage. She doesn't work in finance. She works in weaponry as an explosives expert. Her salary is high, but corpus like to hoard their money, and i doubt they ever pay their employees fairly. (Just like the real world, am i right)

During this whole fiasco of working, she makes some friends with a group of Solaris. Jack, Tiffany, Scott. Revive has nicknames for the three

Jack = Jacky Wacky

Tiffany= Tiffy

Scott =Scottie

Revive ends up agreeing to help the Solaris with their issues, though dislikes working alongside the Tenno.

So not only is Revive working a full time job, she's being a babysitter for her brothers, helping out solaris United, dealing with the man in the wall who randomly pops back into existence one day, and is also dealing with a lot of insanity in her mind that she's constantly pushing back.

A note about her hair is that as a child it was completely light brown hair, however as she got older and did a ton of dangerous things she *should* have died from, white streaks would form in her hair. At the age of 23, her hair turned completely white, which was when Wally popped back into existence.

Most of this is completed lore, and thats about it at the moment because everything is still a work in progress 😅

#warframe #warframe oc #oc dump #oc lore dump #fucking hell this is long #rambles #inbox #inbox open

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problematicfactive · 1 year ago

Text

I didn't feel like it needed to be said but I can understand where people would be a little thrown off, so I'm going to explain the history behind "he/Anxiety"

When I first formed, there was an assumption that along with being the self hatred, I had some sort of "hold" over the systems anxiety. Like I could mitigate it out to members who's jobs it was to deal with the systems anxiety. (That much isn't true)

Back then, I didn't front, I didn't talk, no one in the system wanted me alive and I didn't want to be there. The host refused to call me by my name, so he called me "Anxiety"

I think he was trying to change who I was. Change me from a personification of self hatred to a personification of anxiety. (Which- is kind of Tweek's job) the hope was that if I wasn't ne anymore, I wouldn't present myself as me. Maybe I'd turn into someone else entirely.

For well over 6 months, I was "Anxiety". I wasn't allowed to front on my own, I wasn't allowed to male friends or talk to people. I don't remember those months well, only some parts of them. I think most of that time I shut out my memory.

Eventually, the hostlet up on m restrictions. I couldn't front b myself, but I could talk to people and make friends. Still, I was Anxiety.

I began to accept Anxiety into my life. I understand that it's strange to use as a pronoun, and I'm not asking anyone to alternate between "he" and "anxiety" when speaking about me, but because pronouns are used in the place of names and Anxiety is another name to me, I worked it out that way.

If instead of

Name - he/Anxiety

It was

Name or Anxiety - he/him

People would still say nasty things about the way I use the word.

You can find some of the blogs npc wrote "#npc posts" and see the way he uses Anxiety to reference me

I hope that helped anyone who was confused or thought I was odd, thanks

#problematicfactive blog things #excuse the gap from my last scheduled post i fell asleep and forgot to q anything

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muninnhuginn · 1 year ago

Note

Ask game— i saw u rb odd taxi so let’s go with odakawa! I didn’t take a good look at the questions so I’m just gonna put some random ones here…2, 4, 5, 6, and 8!

Thanks for asking!

Full disclaimer that I still need to give this a full rewatch at some point, because I watched when it first came out, so my memories are somewhat faded.

2. When I think I truly started to like them (or dislike them, if you've sent me a character I don't like)

I liked him from fairly early on tbh. His personality type of lowkey but snarky is always fun, and the show is good at letting him bounce off others in amusing ways. That said, the moment that really recontextualised his whole deal for me and gave me a much greater appreciation of his character was definitely the whole diary reveal.

[Huge spoilers below btw if anyone reading this hasn't seen the series]

I'd been keeping up with the various reddit threads after each episode etc so the fact his furryvision wasn't actually reality wasn't the bit that threw me nor the car accident stuff (given it had been hinted earlier with the cop brothers). It was the revelation that yeah, even though he had the physical brain injury, it wasn't really the "root" of his problems but more a mechanism through which he ended up expressing his psychological issues. At this point, he was using the whole viewing people as animals shtick as a way to allow him to interact with them? That it was his escapism given form. The psychological element of his denial had somehow entirely gone over my head until that point, but in retrospect it made so much sense. A lot of his "quietness" I'd taken as him just kinda chilling/deliberately ignoring annoying people was actually anxiety-driven? Like, don't get me wrong, he very much *does* get fed up with people and his natural state is very low energy. But he was only able to get to where he was because he had a coping mechanism to allow him to interact in the first place. And him seeing people as humans again at the end showed he was growing in the right direction.

It was just this whole new layer I'd somehow entirely overlooked, but was there all along.

4. How many people I ship them with

5. My favorite ship of them

Ended up merging these two together for reasons.

Okay, I won't lie. I'm pretty vanilla when it comes to ships and tend to err on the side of whatever makes most sense to me within canon. So, in this case, I probably just ship him with the one person, Shirakawa. They have a neat dynamic. One which honestly doesn't get explored particularly much (nor does Shirakawa herself, staying largely as a noir-like insert), but which would be fun to see developing further. I'm not super invested honestly, but Odokawa does clearly have a crush on her, and she is very willing to be the one to make the moves in turn (at least once they've straightened things out with each other)

It's a weirdly mature relationship for an anime, where they're both willing to see where it goes rather than leaping head first.

(If forced to pick another character, maybe Dr Goriki? They both share interests with each other and Goriki definitely cares for Odokawa more than a regular doctor would.)

6. My least favorite ship of them

See, it's not necessarily that I dislike this one, but it's probably the option that would mess him up the most so, Dobu. They would be such a fascinating trainwreck of emotional manipulation.

8. Your favorite outfit of them

I'm here wracking my brain trying to remember if he has any style whatsoever and drawing a blank. Uhhh, I appreciate his commitment to wearing caps. But otherwise, he's pretty bland, clothing-wise. Which makes sense from a character perspective, but kills me a little inside even so.

#elibean #thanks again for asking! not been able to talk about this series in ages so was nice to do so #odd taxi #ask meme #asks

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julesthoughts · 2 years ago

Text

I posted 73 times in 2022

Das sind 73 more posts als 2021!

20 posts created (27%)

53 posts reblogged (73%)

Blogs I reblogged most:

@hacked-by-jake

@incorrectnessduskwood

@twxddle

@julesisreading

@raemae17

I tagged 33 of my posts in 2022

#personal – 11 posts

#ask – 11 posts

#duskwood – 11 posts

#thank you – 11 posts

#love – 8 posts

#julesisreading – 8 posts

#<333333333 – 6 posts

#duskwood everbyte – 6 posts

#duskwood fanfiction – 5 posts

#hacked-by-jake – 5 posts

Longest Tag: 43 characters

#i'll paint your nails as dark as my soul 😈

My Top Posts in 2022:

Trap of Lies

Chapter 21

This is a dark AU collaboration started by @x3kristax3. You can find the other chapters here.

TW: Mentioning of Torture and Violence

MC POV

After ages, I was finally able to persuade Alan to leave his house. Of course, only with him, alone he would never let me go. His proximity drove me insane, and his constant advances got on my nerves. I kept telling him that I wasn't ready because of what had happened. He showed understanding, but still, it didn't stop him from trying again and again. It's been two weeks since I left Jake and honestly, I was hoping to get back to him as soon as possible. Back in his warm arms, look into his soft eyes and feel his soft lips on mine.

I shook my head slightly to break the train of thought. I couldn't think about Jake that much now, he was my weakness and weakness wasn't allowed right now. We went to the flower stand and as I was looking around, my favorite flowers caught my eye. I took a bundle and smelled them, a lump forming in my throat immediately. The memory of Jake watching me here back then came flooding back. He was a stranger and yet I felt drawn to him in a way. The corners of my mouth twitched up briefly, but I immediately put my face back to normal.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and put the flowers back as Alan wasn't going to buy them for me anyway. Alan had his back to me, and he was talking to someone, but I couldn't see who it was as he was completely hidden by Alan. I wanted to take a closer look, but suddenly I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder. I could already guess who it was, but I turned around to confirm my suspicion. In front of me was a red-haired beauty and I saw relief on her face. I put my arms around her, and she hugged me tightly to make sure I was really in front of her. I heard her sigh joyfully. The last time we saw each other was before I was kidnapped and held captive.

I wanted to detach myself from the hug, but Jessy wouldn't allow it. "MC, Jake told us everything. Everything. Would you explain to me why you are with him?” She whispered in my ear. The way she pronounced the word him sent chills down my spine.

I leaned closer to her ear and whispered, "I know what I have to do. Please be on standby, Jessy. You're the only one I trust completely." She loosened her grip, and I broke the hug. She put her hands on my cheeks and wiped my tears from my face with her thumbs. I didn't even realize that I started to cry. She gave me a compassionate smile.

"You can't let him see you cry. You can do it, I'll always have your back. You are so incredibly strong.” She took my hand while saying this.

Jessy looked so innocent and sweet, but when it came to her loved ones, she knew no bounds. When she cast her eyes on Alan, I saw pure hatred blazing in her irises. She hated this man like no other person in this world. I knew she would do anything to help me, and I was beyond grateful for that.

"Listen, I'll try to persuade him that I can meet you. I miss you and I could really use a girls day,” I sighed.

She knew that when I said girls' day, I didn't mean a normal girls' day. We wanted to catch up. I saw that Alan had finished his conversation and was approaching us. He put his arm around my waist. "Hello Jessica," he said cold as a stone.

Jessy rolled her eyes and I spoke to Alan, "Alan, I'd like to go with Jessy. She's on her way home and I haven't had a chance to meet her. I'd just like to have some girl time with her."

He took my chin in his fingers and looked deep into my eyes, scanning me. I sighed softly and my eyes softened, getting the answer I wanted. "Only if you promise to come back. I'm worried, you're not fully recovered."

He drove me crazy with his care. It was his fault that I felt so bad. Take a deep breath, MC! You have to pull yourself together if you want to reach your goal and get back to Jake. Since getting back together with Alan I've had serious problems controlling my temper. Knowing that I was pretending to love the man who put me through all the torture made me frustrated.

"Don't worry, I'm feeling pretty good today and besides, Jessy is with me,” I said shortly. I just couldn't speak long sentences with this man without losing my temper.

Out of the blue he took my face in his hands and kissed me firmly but sweetly on my lips. I kissed him back, I had to keep up my acting. I wanted this kiss to end, but Alan let the kiss deepen. What was the matter with him? I opened my eyes and saw that he was looking to the right. I followed his gaze and my heart shattered into a million pieces.

Jake stood there and his eyes were on us. He didn't even grimace, but there was pure pain in his eyes. His eyes made my heart clench painfully. Alan was really enjoying Jake's suffering and I broke the kiss abruptly. Alan glared at me, but I smiled sheepishly, "Alan, you know I'm not that fond of kissing in public." That was the truth, Jake respected my opinion and wouldn't kiss me in public.

Alan stroked my cheek, "Sorry, my feelings for you took over for a moment."

Fucking liar. I didn't understand what that was about, did he want to see Jake suffer? He didn't seem to realize I saw Jake and I took advantage of that. I kept acting the innocent woman in love with Alan. I said goodbye to Alan and when I turned around, I saw Jessy buying some flowers. She gave me a bunch of my favorite flowers and my eyes shone with joy, "Oh Jessy, that wasn't necessary. Thank you!"

On the way to the carriage, I saw Jake walking towards my father's trade business with his head bowed. He avoided my eye contact, and it broke my heart. I had broken his heart in the worst possible way. I began to have doubts as to whether he would even want me back once I had achieved my goal.

As we got into the carriage my lips started to tremble, Jessy already noticed from the outside of the carriage that I was watching Jake. She put her arm around me, and I let my head rest on her shoulder, exhausted.

"So, I'm waiting for an explanation. I know you know he was behind it all. Why are you with him?" She asked when the carriage took off.

I sighed shakily and tilted my head back. "You're right. I know it and I hate his every touch. Every time his lips touch mine it sends a shiver down my spine. But I have to go through this if I'm going to have a quiet life with Jake.” I pulled the ring out of my corset and held it in my hand, my eyes shining as I looked at it. “The question is if he even wants me back.” I spoke my thoughts out loud.

"Oh, my love, you still love him?” she asked happily. "Everyone thinks you don't love him anymore, including him. He needs to know that!"

"No!" I protested heatedly. "He mustn't be involved, do you hear me? And earlier he walked in the direction of my father's business. Something tells me that my father is helping him on the right path.”

Jessy shook her head, "Don't you want to give him at least a glimmer of hope?" She bit her lip, and I could tell immediately that she was holding back something. I ignored it.

"He doesn't need that, if I judge my parents correctly, they will have already given him hope. And if my assumption is right and my father really helps him to get back on the right path, then it would be more than wrong to involve him in it,” I said while bringing my head back to a normal position and avoiding Jessy's gaze.

See the full post

20 notes – Posted November 16, 2022

I'm trying my hand at writing especially for Duskwood Fanfictions. I post Fanfictions on Wattpad and One-Shots here on Tumblr. I'm happy to take requests, if you have a request let me know. Mainly to Duskwood please. I hope you'll like my work. Enjoy!

Wattpad:

Duskwood Fanfictions:

Duskwood - Dark Secrets

Duskwood - Who are you?

Duskwood - Loving A Criminal

Duskwood - Choose or Lose (Sequel to Who are you?)

Duskwood - Dunkle Geheimnisse (German Version of Dark Secrets)

Duskwood - One Shots

Other Stories:

The Betrayal

Tumblr Works:

One-Shots:

Unexpected Reunion (Jake x MC)

Unexpected Reunion - Part Two (Jake x MC)

Unconditional Love (Jake x MC)

Revenge of the Rotten Tomatoes (Request)

You mean like a date? (Thomas x MC)

You are under arrest (Alan x MC)

Collaborations:

Trap of Lies ( Dark AU based in the 1700s)

Rules: No bullying — No rassism — Trigger warning for sensitive topics

25 notes – Postet Oktober 11, 2022

Revenge of the Rotten Tomatoes

A/N: I was asked to turn one of my dreams into a short story. Thanks goes out to @hacked-by-jake Discord Server. The story is just bullshit my brain made up. Enjoy. :)

Words: 694

Requested from: @hacked-by-jake, @itsnotzka, @fem-moony, @julesisreading, @anabellerose96

TW: I don't now, Violence and fighting scenes. xD

I came home from work exhausted. I quickly changed and then went into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich. When I wanted to cut the tomatoes, I saw that they were already rotten, "Eww, no tomatoes today." I threw away the tomatoes and ate my sandwich. It was tasty, but the juicy tomato was missing. After I finished the sandwich, I quickly brushed my teeth and then watched some TV while I fell asleep on the couch.

I woke up early to the sound of loud banging noises. I went outside to see what was going on, the first thing I heard was panicked screams. I saw a young woman run past my house and get pierced by a green spike. She screamed, looked at me and asked for my help. I ran to her, and another green spike hit her. She kept running until she eventually fell down and stopped moving.

I wanted to run to her when a green spike grazed my arm. I turned around and couldn't believe what I saw there. I ran back into my house and opened the bin, my tomatoes! They were gone. Those out there were the tomatoes I threw away last night!

My cell phone rang, and I saw Jake's name on my display. I took the call, and I heard a panicked Jake, "MC! I hacked your laptop's camera, I saw the tomatoes leave your trash can and roll out of your house. We must do something. I'm on your doorstep, I have guns with me. Come out, we must save the world. And bring a trash bag!”

I saw that I had several notifications of breaking news that tomatoes were attacking the city. That was real! What have I done?! I hung up and stormed out the front door. He handed me one of his guns and stuffed the trash bag into his backpack. We ran out into the street and there were 6 tomatoes. They turned to us and let themselves roll towards us. Jake yelled, "Dodge!"

Why were they so big? No time to ask questions! Action is appropriate! I shot the first tomato and it popped but it healed on its own. I looked helplessly at Jake, and he shouted, "The stalks! Shoot the stalks!"

I shot the stalks and the first tomato popped and deflated like a burst balloon. The liquid spilled all over the street and I had some of its seeds stuck to my clothes. The other tomatoes got angry, and their green leaves turned into spikes and spun like a circular saw. A thousand green spikes flew at us like mad. I did an air roll and hid behind my house wall.

Jake shot one of the stalks of the tomatoes and the next tomato burst and its liquid ran like a river across the street. I did several air rolls until I was across the street and standing next to Jake. He pressed himself against the wall of the house and with one quick movement he shot the nearest stalk. "Three left," I stated, shooting for the next one.

I shot again and then again. My gun was empty, Jake nodded knowingly and fired at the last tomato. When the last tomato burst, we went to the place where the huge ones were before. There they were, my tomatoes from last night. In their original size and rottenness. Jake pulled the trash bag out of his backpack and held it open while I tossed the tomatoes into the trash bag. One of them tried to bite me, but I managed to throw it in the trash bag.

Jake tied the garbage bag shut and I stepped on the bag with all my might and crushed the tomatoes. We went home and showered after this adventure. In the evening we invited the others and we all sat together around a cozy campfire. I threw the tomatoes on the fire and let them burn there so nothing like this could ever happen again. We talked and laughed, but there was something we didn't know.

We forgot to throw away one tomato.

It was still out there...

34 notes – Posted November 20, 2022

Unexpected Reunion - Part Two

A/N: I promised a second part and here it is. If you haven't read the first part, you can find it here.

Words: 2.429

TW: Sexual Content!

"I'm so incredibly sorry, MC," he said.

I got up abruptly but didn't turn around. I balled my hands into fists and hung my head while my lips trembled. My heart was racing, was it really him? I had never heard that voice in my entire life. Who else could it be, only he had a reason to be sorry. I turned around and two metallic blue eyes looked at me. His jet-black hair hung in his face, but it didn't seem to bother him. He was wearing a black hoodie with a leather jacket, his hood pulled low over his face. His hair was blowing in the wind, he was soaked from the rain just like me. How long had he followed me that he was so wet from the rain? My heart ached as he smiled. He had fooled me for four years. I didn't return his smile, I was too hurt. His smile faded and regret flashed in his eyes.

My vision blurred, I looked into his eyes and asked, "Jake?" He nodded and I saw tears forming in his eyes. He was about to say something, but I cut him off, angry. "So, you're telling me you've been alive for four years? And it didn't occur to you to leave me any sign of life? And if it's one of your fucking riddles with an encrypted message! You know I would have kept it to myself if you had asked me to! Shit, I'm standing here in front of your grave, but you're standing in front of me!"

He took a step toward me, but I backed off. He wanted to grab my hand, but I pulled it away. "Don't touch me," I hissed. He looked down, hurt, but I wasn't done with him. "Lilly dropped the bombshell and her parents got divorced! I was in touch with your mate, he was devastated! I was devastated! Hannah blames herself for your death! Lilly wanted so badly to meet her big brother, but you didn't let her! I blamed the others for your death! Jessy is still trying to reach me until today! Do you have any idea what kind of grief your death caused?! The whole group broke! Happy Hannah no longer exists! They've already lost Richy, they accepted you as a friend! I HATE YOU!"

Jake seemed to have had enough because he yelled back. "NO! Don't you dare say you hate me! Five minutes ago, you said something else! I looked after you for four damn years," he quieted down when he realized I was letting him talk. "Alan told the FBI you were in contact with me. They wanted to arrest you, shit you just wanted to help. I had to distract them from you somehow. When I found out that Hannah was safe, I knew I had to go. Yes, I almost died. They found the hoodie because I took it off because it was unbearably warm in the mine. I made it to the exit I told you about in time. I jumped at the chance when the FBI thought I was dead. I don't know how, but they figured out I survived. So, they tried to contact you. I hacked into your laptop and blocked all ways for them to reach you. The same game with your phone. After that, I drew their attention to me. I hacked into their database and left obvious traces. So, you were no longer their target, you could live freely."

I started crying, he had sacrificed his safety for me. "But you couldn't live freely anymore." He shook his head. "You were worth it to me and still are," he said shyly. "What do you mean still?" I asked shocked. "I'm still not safe, but I made a false lead. Don't be mad at me, but with Nym-Os I always had access to your phone and also your location. As I said before, I've watched over you for four years. Took care of you. Made sure you're safe. For the last three years I have always been here with you at the cemetery." He gulped hard and a tear ran down his cheek. "It was incredibly difficult for me not to run up to you and take you in my arms. I was constantly afraid that if I approached you, I would put you in danger. I had never managed to lay a false trail that lasted longer. Now I've finally managed to do it and I swore to myself to speak to you. To explain everything to you. I hated that you fell into deep depression because of me and my actions. I can understand if you want nothing more to do with me, but I wanted to explain everything to you. I'm so incredibly sorry."

I raised my arms to interrupt him. "Stop trying to get pity from me. Thank you for the explanation, but I will never be able to forgive you. I can't thank you enough for keeping me safe, but at the same time you broke me. I wish you the best of luck in your life, you deserve only the best despite your actions. Goodbye, Jake."

He let his hands hang down and just nodded. He looked down dejectedly as I turned away from him and left the cemetery. Shivering, I buttoned up my jacket and crossed my arms across my belly. I quickly ran back to the motel as it started to rain heavily. "Why did I leave my umbrella in the car," I cursed at myself. I could already see the motel and a relieved smile spread across my face. I was looking forward to getting into my warm motel room.

"MC!" someone shouted through the rain. No, he didn't actually follow me. I picked up my pace, my teeth chattering so cold I was. I've been in the rain in the cold for far too long. "MC!!"The voice was closer, my heart started racing. It was Jake, now I could definitely confirm it. I didn't know why, but my body decided to run. "Wait please! MC!" His voice broke my heart.

I kept running but strong arms pulled me back by my hand and he turned me around. "What do you want?" I yelled at him with tears in my eyes. He didn't say anything, he cupped my face in his hands and pulled me up to him. He leaned down slightly and pressed his lips firmly to mine. This contact triggered a firework of emotions in me. I didn't hesitate and wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. I couldn't suppress my feelings and smiled into the kiss. The kiss became feverish, we couldn't get enough of each other. The taste of his lips mixed with the rain and my salty tears.

He pushed himself against me and I backed up until I was stopped by a pillar. He pressed me firmly against the pillar and my breathing became shallower and I felt warm all of a sudden. His hands traveled up and down my waist and my hands found their way into his hair. I moaned softly as his hand slipped under my sweater. "Wait," I whispered into the kiss, pushing him slightly away from me. He looked at me in disappointment and I couldn't help but giggle. "Let's go inside, I prefer it private."

We walked into the motel and the receptionist just rolled her eyes and put her headphones back in. I pulled Jake by my hand until we got to my motel room. I turned to him, smiling, but he looked at me doubtfully. "Is something wrong?"

He shook his head, "No, but I'm sorry about what just happened down there. I didn't mean to force you into anything. I don't even know that about myself, that I'm so so so..."

I walked up to him with a genuine smile, "So wild and passionate?" He nodded silently, he continued to look at me doubtfully, but his eyes gave him away. Pure lust flashed in them. "Who says you forced me? If I remember correctly, I just returned your passion," I purred.

"I just don't want you to regret it. I want to prove to you that I really love you. I don't want you to think that I'm an asshole." Again, he looked depressed to the ground, only now do I see how sorry he was about all this. I walked up to him, cupped his chin in my fingers and looked lovingly into his eyes. "Prove it by giving yourself to me."

He didn't need to be told twice, shortly afterwards I felt his lips on mine again. I took off his leather jacket and he took off my jacket. We stumbled across the room until my legs reached the bed and he gave me a little push, so I fell onto the bed, back first. He immediately climbed onto me and slipped a leg between my legs, making me moan.

He kissed an imaginary line down my neck. When he got to the collar of my sweater he growled in frustration. He took off my sweater, I did the same and took off his hoodie. Our hands conquered each other's bodies, we didn't want to miss an inch. He kissed down on me, when he got to my waistband, he unbuttoned my jeans and slowly pulled them off me. His hands caress along my legs. He kissed my thighs, I looked down at him for a brief moment and our eyes met.

I caught my breath as I looked into his eyes, full of desire and admiration. A flash of joy shot through my whole body and the butterflies in my belly went crazy. When he pressed his lips to mine again, I helped him pull his jeans off. It wasn't long before we were lying completely naked on top of each other.

When he entered me, it was all over with me. I tilted my head back and dug my nails into his back. Every time he almost pulled out of me, I wanted to pull him back to me. Once he was fully inside me again, I didn't want to let him go. This feeling made me moan louder with each of his thrusts. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him as close to me as possible. He brought us both to the climax and we lay on top of each other, breathing heavily.

He gave me a soft kiss and rolled off me to enclose me in his arms. My heart was beating way too fast, and I was on cloud nine. I gave him a quick kiss on his chest and inhaled his scent. His regular deep breathing made me fall into a deep sleep.

When I woke up the next morning, I was afraid to open my eyes. Afraid that Jake was gone or that it was all just a dream. But shortly afterwards I felt a hand on my cheek that gently stroked me. I couldn't help but grin and kissed his hand. "Don't stop touching me."

He kissed my forehead, and I slowly opened my eyes. There he lay looking at me lovingly with a big smile on his face. But his smile faded and so did mine. "You have to go back, don't you?" He nodded and I could see him trying to swallow the lump in his throat. I thought for a moment and then voiced my thoughts, "Take me with you."

"No, MC. That's too dangerous. I don't want to endanger you unnecessarily." I sat up abruptly and glared at him, "Who says it's your choice? I want to go with you!" We argued for ages, at one point Jake challenged me, "Give me one reason why you would want to sacrifice your safety for me?"

"Because I love you! There you have it! I love you!" He seemed speechless, doubts overcame me. "You... you don't love me?" His head snapped at me, and I forgot to breathe, pure determination in his eyes. "Don't you ever question my love for you again!" He said slowly and his voice was deep, he was angry. I swallowed hard, "Jake please. I've been without you for four years. Please don't do it to me again."

He got up abruptly and got dressed, I looked at him sadly. I guess he really didn't want me around. My lips trembled and my vision became blurry. He cupped my chin in his fingers and placed a gentle kiss on my lips, smiling cheekily. "It's nice to see you naked, but if you're going to run off with me, you'd better get dressed."

A wide smile spread across my face. I got up to get some fresh clothes when he suddenly pushed me against the wall. "I just can't control myself in your presence, we still have a few hours. We should enjoy them." I nodded and he pressed me even tighter against the wall, leaning against me from behind. I groaned as he entered me from behind. I loved his passion and how wild he got during sex. At the same time, I loved how shy he was when we talked normally.

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57 notes – Posted Oktober 20, 2022

Meine #1 des Jahres 2022

Unconditional Love

TW: Sexual Content

Words: 1,732

A/N: I tried my best at writing fluff. It's not my best work, but here it is. It was requested by @julesisreading 🧡

Before I left the gym, I checked my phone one more time. No new messages. I hated showering at the gym so I saved the shower for at home. I got in my little car and drove home. I parked in the residents' lot and entered the apartment building. I cursed myself for doing leg day today, walking up five more floors afterwards was just hell. I unlocked the door to the apartment and flopped onto the couch, groaning in exhaustion.

As my pulse and breathing calmed down again, I listened and heard the fast typing on the keyboard from the next room. He asked me not to disturb him, he had been in there for three days now and when he left the room it was only to go to the bathroom. We also didn't talk if we should meet during his walk to the bathroom. I'd like to know what he was doing in there, but he said it was just because of his work. He worked for the FBI now, but he's never been this busy.

It was pretty late at night so I made myself something to eat and sat on the couch and watched the live stream from the Aurora. My favorite band performed there today, but unfortunately I couldn't be there. I lay down on the sofa and fell asleep. When I woke up the next morning I was covered with a pillow under my head. A bottle of water sat on the living room table with a small note, "I love you."

Even if he was distant at the moment because of his work, he always left his love for me. He knew I loved those little gestures. I didn't need huge bouquets of roses or any chocolates. I was grateful that he had put the pillow under my head otherwise I would have a stiff neck now.

I noticed that I was still wearing my gym clothes. "Ew, that's gross," I said in disgust, sprinting to the bathroom. I wrapped myself in a towel and as I exited the bathroom I noticed that it was unusually quiet in here. I walked slowly and quietly into the bedroom and a love-struck grin crept onto my lips. Jake lay in bed asleep, he didn't even get to cover himself up, he was so tired.

I quietly opened the closet and quickly dug out some clothes. I tucked Jake in and placed a light kiss on his forehead. He didn't notice any of this and went on sleeping. I giggled softly when I saw him snuggling into the blanket. I slipped quietly into the bathroom and got dressed, I made two toasts and drank a coffee. After that I brushed my teeth. Shortly thereafter, my cell phone rang and I internally cursed not to have put it on silent.

I quickly ran to my phone and when I read the name, I growled, "Phil."

I took the call, "What do you want Phil?"

He chuckled, "Why are you in such a bad mood? You know I could have gotten a seat for you last night."

"Phil," I said firmly, feeling a presence behind me. This name literally summoned him. "Thanks for the offer, but I know you would want me to work for you if I had accepted the offer. And we all know you don't need any help."

"Who says that?" he asked in his flirty voice.

"I'll say that. I've been watching you, you're anything but overwhelmed at work. You're rather underwhelmed, you just want me there to let the female guests flirt with you more. And you want to use me to brag. "

"And who says that?" he asked a bit annoyed.

"You, drunk," I giggled into the phone. I felt two arms wrap around my waist and try to possess me like I was being taken away from him. He kissed my neck and let me exhale heavily. I tried to stifle a groan as he ran a hand over my breast.

I tried to hang up but he kept me on the phone. That was probably my punishment for accepting the call in the first place. But I didn't let such a punishment escape me. I enjoyed his touch and closed my eyes as he smiled at my neck since I wasn't wearing a bra. He twisted and tugged at my nipples, almost making me mewl.

His hand slipped under my top, exposing one of my breasts. He stood in front of me and closed his mouth around my nipple and his tongue drove my nipple mad. He crouched down a bit because I was a bit smaller than him. He looked me in the eyes from below and my breath caught. I threw my head back. It was only seconds, but it was wonderful to finally feel his contact again.

I was about to groan when Phil's voice snapped me out of my ecstasy, "It was a pity you weren't there, the others missed you too. It's a real pity you live on another continent."

"I thought it was a pity too," I immediately put my hand to my mouth. I sounded totally horny and my voice was deep with lust.

Jake smiled and nibbled on my nipple and I squeaked softly. "Everything ok?" asked Phil.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. I... um... I have to... hang up now." My breathing quickened as his hands slid to my waistband.

"Okay? Goodbye."

Without saying goodbye, I hung up and glared at the man in front of me. He got up and I knew he just wanted to play. I immediately put on a frustrated face as he covered my breast in my top again.

"Jake! You can't do that," I whined.

"Watch me," he said walking back to his office. I laughed mockingly and he immediately stopped. He didn't move. The game can begin. I grinned cheekily, but when he turned around I put on a disappointed expression.

"Oh, don't worry about me. Go back to your cave." He scanned me from head to toe, trying to find a flaw in my changed behavior.

Inside I laughed evilly. I knew how high the risk is that he will either get mad at me after my next sentence or if he will pounce on me and show me his love.

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68 notes – Posted November 6, 2022

Hol dir deinen Tumblr-Jahresrückblick 2022 →

#tumblr2022 #Mein Tumblr-Jahresrückblick 2022 #Dein Tumblr-Jahresrückblick #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #not even a whole year

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mhofergirl-blog · 1 year ago

Text

6 years ago today, I saw my cousin Todd for the last time. Todd lived a very rough life, some by choices he made and many by choices made for him as a child and young person. We called him Todd Wad and Toddy Waddy. On that last day, I was able to see him, pray over him, tell him I loved him, asked his forgiveness for not being there for him.

I live with regret over Todd! As a child I felt helpless to do anything to make his life better, I didn't know how to make sure he felt loved and that he mattered on this planet.

I didn't see Todd or his 2 brothers often but when we did, it was usual things like hide and seek. I remember once, we went to the park in Hayward and there was a little zoo type place along the side. We saw an albino peacock...we were amazed. Todd was always silly and goofy. We have a family movie from that day, Todd was supposed to carry the pot for the pork and beans, instead he wore it on his head! Of course, he got in trouble 🤣

As an adult when I saw Toddy, he was a bit shy and reserved, I think embarrassed and shamed by his past, but I loved him. I felt such sorrow!

Todd made SOME changes and some better choices, but it was too late not to suffer the natural consequences of his actions. We talked of Jesus, Todd struggled to believe he could be forgiven and believe Jesus loved him.

On that last day, I received a call saying Todd was going to die within hours. I got in my car and drove to Fresno as fast as I could. I prayed and asked God to allow me to see this damaged soul once more.

I arrived at the hospital, I was told he was unresponsive for almost 24 hours and he only had a couple hours or less to live. Todd seemed lifeless already, no movement, no words, no reactions.

I sat on Toddy's bed beside him. I kissed his head, I rubbed his forehead, I held his hand and I talked. The Dr and nurses said, he can't hear you. I believed differently. I told him I loved him, I talked about good memories from our childhood.

I asked his forgiveness for not being able to help him and I told him Jesus loved him and that it was ok for him to let go, to stop suffering and go to be with Jesus.

As I began to speak of forgiveness and Jesus, Toddy moved his arms and legs, a year formed in the corner of his right eye. He could hear me! His body might have given out but his spirit was alive!

After a few hours,I kissed my cousin's face, told him he was precious and loved. I left the hospital. That was the last time I saw Todd. I know that Jesus holds Todd in his comfort and love.

I share this story because I believe most families have a Todd. I share to evoke compassion and to stand against thinking because that wasn't your path that you are above or better than someone whose life wasn't as clean as yours! I say this to that, the Bible says

ALL have sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard. Yet God, in his grace, freely makes us right in his sight. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.

The other reason I share is to remind each of us that love is free, compassion is free, wisdom is free.

I love you all!

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mirukimary · 2 years ago

Text

My Art Summary for 2022!

(Under the cut I'll go into more details for each month, for memory's sake. Warning: It's LONG.)

Come one, come all for your opportunity to see all of the drawings I should have posted but never did! The ones that make me work harder every december to remember when tf i drew what! The ones that, in missing, make it seem like i only draw once a year--! (going through my twitter media tab is depressing LMAO)

JANUARY

[Pictured: Iola in Prenda clothing. There was a Twitter Post going around asking you to draw your WoL in your country's traditional clothes. Ofc I didn't skip the opportunity to do it! And drew my BF's WoL too for good measure. Still my fav drawing of the year!]

Also worked on a VTuber model for a friend (i drew it as a bust january last year; then this year was asked to expand it to full body). It was very challenging, but also fun!

For the rest, I designed some backstory NPCs for Asera (Daimyorus childhood friend, his goddess and a mage that helped us multiple times); and drew some twitch emotes for a client. Was a fresh, fun start. I remember having a lot of fun and finding that month quite relaxing.

(Goddess Rondra, Mage Rupin & elf-friend Pedro (RIP))

FEBRUARY

[Pictured: My friend's bunny boi~]

Further work was done on the VTuber model, a lot of parts that weren't quite working before were redrawn. He was taking form!! Now that most of the work was done, also did a ref sheet to go with it. I couldn't wait to see him moving!

That's when I started preparing to open commissions for realz, trying to think of prices and set up examples. I drew some BGs and the Complexity Guide, and set most of the boring things up. I plan to open comms either Jan 2023 or February 2023, so let's hope all the work paid off~

MARCH

[Pictured: 'Smile at the Blue Skies', or "Fuq i need a bust sketch ref for my commission examples page". Sounds a bit less dreamy now, huh? LMAO]

But yeah, most of the month was dedicated to the VTuber model, working to fix it as the rigger found issues. Ref Sheet was finished this month. I'll stop mentioning the model, but the back and forth lasted till june or so?? Had to fix all of his toggles; and redraw his entire hair to allow for a better 3D effect when moving (it went from 3~6 layers to over 20). This was my first time working on vtuber models, so there was A LOT to learn. It surprising how many pitfalls there is in vtuber making. I'm very proud of how it turned out, and eternally grateful to the rigger (and to my friend) for being so patient with me. I was sent a small demo of what he looks like, and seeing your drawing move so beautifully like that feels magical!! There's still much to design and draw before he can debut, but hope you can support him then!

Oh yeah, there was this attempt too:

APRIL

[Pictured: 'With Friends' the commission I worked on through March and April. Extra special because that's my friend & his pets there!]

Also sketched some ideas for illustrations of our RP characters (hi Irene), but never really completed them:

It feels so long since I made these... Double checked like 3 times to make sure it wasn't April 2021 LMAO

I REALLY want to revisit some of these now.

MAY

[Pictured: #XIVARTBASH drawing, featuring Nero.]

Also drew the catgirl from Love2DrawManga. Didn't do much this month (...or did but forgot). I believe I worked on some BGs I can't show, but these are still very much stuck at WIP :(

JUNE

[Pictured: Nia's WoL, Mat. Just a smol gift for someone that brings a lot of joy to FFXIV Twitter.]

So... I completelly forgot I was drawing my OCs outfits [facepalm]:

(Don't mind the two in the corner, I don't want my essay to get hit with Tumblr hammer LMAO They're nowhere near done). But yeah, these are my OCs from 'Elder''. I've had them since childhood, and still love them, even if I gave up on the book idea. Will make an actual post once all is done and I can go back to their character illusts uwu

JULY

[Pictured: Cade from 'Still Shining'. Working on this was an amazing experience~ Won't go on detail bc I already did, but still glad for the experience!]

Instead I'll talk about... Art Fight month!!!

SO.MUCH.FUN

I'm 100% going back next year! This event just proved how much I love drawing people's OCs. I really want to be a commission artist so I can do that for a living. Sadly I didn't get to draw everyone I wanted, plus I wasted a lot of time trying to look through OCs while the website was dying LMAO Next year I'll come prepared!

Also I drew that Spring picture to use as a reference in her profile there. I missed drawing her!

AUGUST

[Pictured: Commission for 'Under Maintenance'.]

Mostly worked on commemorative stuff. Anniversary chibi for Brie; that Under Maintenance pic; Thank You for DL message for 'Loving You Fully' and 'Still Shining'. Also designed some outfits (and painted some sprites) for Mythic Meetup: Midnight Mystery (not released yet!).

Started a bday gift for my boyfriend, but something kept looking 'off' about it so I didn't finish in time. Turns out it was overblended... And will require a redraw. Sorry boyfriend TT But my wife (tm) needs to look perfect!!

Also made the design for our new RP characters:

(mine is the not-cat girl, obviously)

...And I belive this is when I made that cursed Yshtola feeding Zero picture? Yeah.

SEPTEMBER

[Pictured: Witch Torunn]

Made the YCH bases, as well as 3 examples. I have no memories of this month, but Windows says this sketch is from september:

OCTOBER

[Pictured: Old OC redraw, for my Commission Guide. Decided to do it after a client asked for clarification if an old drawing was halfbody or fullbody (august last year, Torunn sitting down).]

They're really old OCs of mine. Ever RP-ed in Deviantart groups? I did!!

Cecilia (<-) is pretty much a Iola prototype: salve maker and potion seller who lives with her dad (who taught her the craft). One day he collapses during work, and Cecilia ends up overworking herself to afford his medicine and other living expenses. In desperation, she joins The Guild as a novice magician for money, and gets herself involved on a war she never intended to join.

Celticca (->) is a archer and aspiring musician who wants to make the most beautiful song (tm) for her family. She's very sweet, but naïve and scatterbrained. I didn't have much planned for her, but had a lot of fun seeing her constantly get involved with Evil/Neutral alligned characters w/o noticing LOL

....Now that I think about it, she's literally a FFXIV bard, before I knew anything about XIV.

The rest of October was focused on Magni's Birthday Project and my YCH Halloween Commissions.

...And THIS:

Halloween pictures of our current RP characters \O/ To go with our halloween session~ Also drew these two for our halloween one-shot:

Ellie (<-) and Hadrianus (->). Ellie is a yandere witch I made as a joke and fell in love with. Hadrianus is my BF's wizard. Yes, he looks like Dr. Strange. Yes, that's the joke. The 3rd character was Rosemary, but I didn't ask to draw her so she's missing :( I do want to draw all of them at some point. We accidentally made "Spy x Family, but it's horror and Loid wants to run away" LOOOL I love this trio!!

Made 2 adoptables, but since they went unsold I decided to remove them and redraw for next year:

(The neutral pose doesn't help them stand out ^^;; Sorry bbys)

Also sketched Julio from Atelier Sophie~

(Hoping to finish it early next year. He's not the only idea I had while playing, but other stuff took priority"")

October was so much fun!! Sadly it let me completely drained by the end of it. I got hit with such a HUGE art block it was like my hands just... Forgot how to draw. Everything came out weird. Sadly, that resulted on me having to drop a drawing I was making for Brie :/ Hoping I can pick it back up soon... (better late than never right?)

It's around that time I decided to work on an AI redraw. Used Crayon (old Dall-e Mini) to create some monstrosity for me and tried to turn it into an actual drawing.

The monstrosity:

The Work In Porgress:

This drawing is a bit painful to look at, because of all the self doubt and bad feelings attached to it. But I want to finish it someday. My prompt was something stupid like 'cute anime girl having fun'. I want to remain true to the prompt and make her meeting with lil ladybug feel warm and fun!

...Like of the feelings I was missing back then, and am just now starting to get back.

TL;DR: Take breaks or you'll break.

NOVEMBER

[Pictured: Chibi Adra for Kyou.]

Managing burnout through most of it. Eventually just decided to stop fighting and played games instead. Even with the frame drops, Atelier Ryza is pretty fun~ Hoping to go bk to it soon.

At some point my boyfriend said I should just draw things to have fun for a bit. I followed his advice...

DECEMBER

[Pictured: Art Party (DracoLunari's WoL)]

...By drawing Iola as a sheep herder. It was much more fun than it sounds. I didn't care for polish at all, just seeing Iola in a cute outfit LMAO It's... A mess of a drawing. But it's MY mess of a drawing. I feel this thought calmed my mind a lot.

Also went for my first ever Art Party. It was fun, tho brain did get in the way after a bit, as expected ^^;;; Still want to go to these more often!! It's fun to draw & chat with others.

For random drawings, all I have is a(n embarrassing) fanart of Elf from Isekai Ojisan. I'll post eventually..... (that anime is hilarious)

For now I have a commission and a collab to take care of, and a certain Moon Goddess to draw as soon as possible~ Will be doing my best these next few days, and hope Iola can be my sheperd and guide me to the path of 'having lots of fun drawing again'.

ONWARDS TO 2023...

May my year be filled with bad drawings that I love;

And good drawings I'm proud of.

May your year give you the same

And everything else you wish for!

Thanks @/Taxkha on twitter for the Template!

#maryart #art summary 2022 #it's a wall of text #but i feel i'd regret it it any other way #happy holidays all

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