#i was writing something with constrictai in it

[crying-over-cartoons]

seriously considering making a ninjago AU comprised entirely of speculative biology about serpentine because their whole everything is pretty inconsistent but I really like snakes so I wanna fix it up a bit

[ultra-creepy-fucker-things]

Discovery Part One

While excavating the ancient ruins of a serpentine village, Skalidor discovers something that will change the way ninjago’s past in viewed

Skalidor looked up from the story, sitting back in his chair.

That was huge! No story of the Great Devourer he'd heard previously had delved into her origins, and he was an expert.

Beyond the involvement of the Overlord, he doubted there was much truth to the story, but it was an interesting insight into what was believed at the time.

And it explained the prevalence of a more serpentine-like Devourer, depicted in a lot of art from the time- perhaps she had been a serpentine once? Maybe a mage, transformed by a spell gone wrong, or an ill-advised deal with the Overlord.

Whatever the origin, the translation was complete, they'd taken picture after picture of the artifact and posted it to their public digital museum, with the original stored in their archives, safe from the hands of anti-serpentine extremists.

He was sure there'd be some pushback, a lot of more conservative humans saw the idea of the FSM creating the serpentine as propaganda, but that hardly mattered. All he cared about was History.

He stood, stretched his legs, and exited his office/apartment to check on the few artifacts they'd managed to preserve.

Most of it was from Ouroboros, there were children's toys, shards of pottery, a suit of armor, designed for a serpentine general, one of the now useless fangblades, and, now, a collection of tablets, found in what must've once been a library.

Skalidor went up to the collection, smiling to himself.

It really was a treasure trove- thank the FSM the explorer's club hadn't gotten there first.

Satisfied that all was well in the archive, he turned back to his office, turning out the light as he went.

___

Skalidor had largely stopped talking to them once he gave up the title of constrictai general, but it still wasn't a shock when he found an email from Fangtom and Fangdam waiting in his inbox the next morning

Before the war, the twin leaders of the fangpyre tribe had been students in the fields of anthropology and religious studies, respectively- a never before heard legend about the Great Devourer would be right up their ally.

Great Devour Legend From: fangtomfangdam To: profskalidor How time flies, Skalidor! It seems only yesterday you could barely write your own name- now you're translating ancient squamata hieroglyphs! We read your work and we are very impressed, what do you say we catch up over lunch? Please let us know if you're free                                                                   -Yours, Fangtom and Fangdam Skalidor smiled to himself as he read, then, went to clear the day's schedule.

Re: Great Devourer Legend

From: Profskalidor

To: fangtomfangdam

Indeed, it's been too long since we've last talked, I'd love to have lunch! Don't worry, I've got nothin' to do today that I can't put off. Where do you want to meet?

                                                              -sincerely, Skalidor

He got up to brush his teeth, and got his answer by the time he returned

Re: Re: Great Devourer Legend

From: fangtomfangdam

To:  Profskalidor

The mess hall is fine- no need to tempt fate.

                                                   - Fangtom, Fangdam

A few hours later, Skalidor made it over to the mess hall, Fangtom and Fangdam were already there, sitting at a table by the back, and they waved him over.

Skalidor walked over, and extended his hand for a fistbump "Hey, long time, no see, what's been keeping ya?"

"Oh, you know" said Fangtom

"Leadership stuff" said Fangdam

"I've been trying to convince Borg Industries to help fund a serpentine genome sequencing project..." said Fangtom

"But they won't give it to him unless they have exclusive access to the findings" continued Fangdam.

Skalidor frowned, sitting across from the two, noticing that they'd brought what appeared to be a printout of his translation.

"On the subject of research" he said, "what'd you think of the myth?"

Fangdam's face lit up, "Oh, it was fascinating! I knew that a lot of art from early serpentine depicted the Great Devourer looking like a serpentine, as opposed to her true, monstrous form, but most mythology I knew of cast her as either a creation of the Overlord or a separate, unaffiliated diety with no ties to either god, similar to Wojira- a part of me wonders if this is actually a story of Garmadon's corruption"

Fangtom cut in "Not that we're questioning your translation, it appears to be entirely accurate, but it could represent a more metaphorical meaning, as opposed to a literal belief, perhaps a way of getting the truth out under the radar"

"Or" said Fangdam "The Devourer has some connection to the First Spinjutsu Master that has since been forgotten, certainly not a daughter, but perhaps she was a student of his, either way, I think this is likely an accurate reflection of what they believed back then, given the prevalence of serpentine-like Devourers"

Skalidor nodded, "I came to the same conclusion, she's been worshipped for thousands of years, for thousands of reasons, but maybe the people or Ouroboros actually empathized with her, seeing her as more than a monster that they'd conquered or a weapon to sic on their enemies"

Fangdam shuddered, "It's hard to imagine... empathizing with that monster" he looked spooked, no doubt thinking back to the footage of Her attack that'd practically played on loop in the months after her death.

Skalidor looked at his hands. He thought of his childhood, how, until Pythor freed the constrictai, all he'd known was the cold and the dark, barely able to even see.

He hadn't realized how miserable he was until the sun first hit his scales.

"I can't agree there" he said, "It's a sad thing for a snake to be kept from the sun"

All three of them fell silent, thinking of the dirt and rocks and concrete that stood between them and the open sky.

It was Fangdam that broke the silence, "Maybe it is time for us to eat" he said, prompting his side of the body to stand.

Relieved, Skalidor, too, got to his feet, "Yes, I'd like that"

___

That evening, Skalidor received another email, this one from a highly regarded news site focused on archeology.

He opened it.

And was amazed.

An ancient serpentine settlement had been uncovered, older than Ouroboros, older even than the oldest human remains found in ninjago, and as yet completely untouched.

The former general sat up in his chair, shaking with excitement, this was the opportunity of a lifetime! If he could only get a team assembled and get there before some fame-hungry explorer club wannabe got there and took all the artifacts(no doubt breaking some of them, he thought) then this could be the discovery of the century.

But he would need a team.

He got up and left his apartment for the warehouse just outside his door.

He'd need to plan this out tonight, and walking helped him think.

From the darkness, hundreds of tiny eyes watched him.

If he hadn't been in such a hurry, then maybe he'd have noticed sooner.

As it was, he saw nothing until the armor found in Ouroboros rared before him, full of writhing serpents.

Skalidor stumbled back, eyes wide, subconsciously reaching for a weapon he no longer carried.

"You are Professsor Sssskalidor, correct?" the voice seemed to come from everywhere, and through the haze of panic, Skalidor realized what he was dealing with.

"You're the Vermilion" he stated.

It had no mouth, and yet somehow gave the impression of grinning, "General Machia, it'sss a pleasssure to meet you"

Skalidor glared at where he assumed her eyes should be, "We won't let you take ninjago"

"We have no interest in ruling ninjago, that was what Krux wanted" her mass shifted, leaning down and closer to Skalidor "and I assure you, if Krux showsss his face around here again, I'll kill him myself"

There was a chorus of angry hissing, right on the edge of hearing, and Skalidor shivered.

The Vermilion were scary on their own, but he got the distinct impression that no matter her species, General Machia wasn't someone you wanted to make an enemy of.

He did not envy the twins.

"Then, what do you want from me?" he asked.

"After Krux betrayed us, our foundations were shattered, and we were left with nothing" said General Machia, "We only wish to learn about Mother"

Skalidor's eyes widened, "the Great Devourer" he breathed.

"Yesss" said the vermilion general, "but keep in mind, if you trick us, manipulate us, use us, I won't hesitate to kill you. We learned a hard lesson with Krux. We will not be fooled again"

Skalidor nodded, "I understand" he said, "but... If I'm gunna help you, you'll have to help me"

___

Maybe recruiting the Vermilion was a mistake.

Even the most eager archeologists among them stepped down when they realized who they'd be working with, the reputation of the vermilion was fearsome, and their appearance, masses of snakes, crudely shaped into a serpentine form by the armor they wore, didn't help matters.

In the end, only one was willing to work with them.

Byter was the last of a niche but ancient religion, one that exalted the Great Devourer as the serpentine's creator- and the child of the First Spinjutzu Master.

It used to be more popular among the entombed, but since Her release and subsequent death, only he held out.

He wasn't privy to the petty drama of the other tribes, but when Fangdam had called him up that morning, pissed out of his mind and shouting over his brother, he's gotten the impression that Byter was no more popular than the vermilion.

No matter, he'd promised to help the vermilion general, and he couldn't very well go back on that promise now.

The site was at the base of an ancient volcano and had been buried in ash thousands of years ago, only to be uncovered recently in a once-in-a-century landslide.

At a reasonable pace, the site was three days travel away.

Skalidor and his team made it in one.

He'd had his misgivings, but the vermilion were diligent workers, helping him to find, catalog, and, in the case of small, easily stolen trinkets, collect and take back to be archived.

They were better than serpentine, actually, the whole group acting as a well-oiled machine, and he hardly had to do anything except tell them what to do and examine what they uncovered.

Watching them, he realized that, while they were a hivemind, they weren't a single entity, spread across many bodies.

One was meticulous about the tools they were given, cleaning them and putting them away with the utmost care.

Another seemed to have a particular interest in the old jewelry- and another seemed aware of this, keeping an eye out and foiling any thefts.

Byter got along with them well, at least.

But in one way, he was glad he hadn't brought more serpentine.

The site was grizzly, the bodies of serpentine caught in the ash were twisted in agony, and Skalidor felt vividly the suffering that had been over since before Ouroboros was even a small trading outpost by the ocean.

They were old form serpentine, with four arms and no legs, and if Fangtom had come, he was sure he'd have a field day.

As it was, he just felt sick.

And then, he found it.

In what once had been a temple, there was a statue, battered and beaten and missing an arm, but otherwise way more intact then anything else he'd seen from this far back

At first, he mistook it for a statue of Her, it shared many characteristics with other early depictions- six legs, a tail like a general, a mane, unlike anything you'd ever see on a serpentine- but it didn't look quite right.

The hair was braided, instead of wild, and unlike any depiction of the Great Devourer he'd ever seen, this one had antlers.

Carved at the base of the statue was a fairly standard serpentine creation myth- Portraying the First Spinjitzu Master as a serpentine.

[avomorg]

Well, now I'm 16.

I want to say a huge thank you to those who follow my work. This is incredibly valuable support.

I want to show something new. I will be very pleased if someone shares this. :)

Now I'm trying to get more or less serious about the fanseason. If I can, I will do it in the form of a comic, but for now I am working on ideas and building a plot.

«The Cloud Kingdom has always been considered the most peaceful place in all of the Sixteen Realm. Monks have been put in place as mediators between fate and life, and with their writing they must mitigate events if creatures cannot bear them. But few are grateful to the Writers of Fates for their writings.

Exiled from the Cloud Kingdom for a deal with the Preeminent, Fenwick did not accept his new fate. He wants to regain control over his own destiny, as well as seize power in the Cloud Kingdom. The monks ask the elemental masters and ninjas for help to protect the Cloud Kingdom from Fenwick – after all, if the scrolls of fate fall into unreliable hands, danger threatens everyone. Even one person can change the fate of the whole world.»

I must say that this is only a small part of what I want to touch on. I also want to talk about Morro's family, about the creatures forgotten by the canon like Nimbus, about the work of the scrolls of fates, the structure and history of the Cloud Kingdom.

Several sketches.

The first is the lower layer of the Cloud Kingdom, close to the ground. The clouds there are very thin, you can hardly walk on them. So far, no one has descended to the ground at all, and the monks recommend not to do this.

The second is a character from the new Serpentine tribe. Close relatives of Constrictai, who did not travel to the main island with the FSM, but remained on a distant patch of land. One of their most important principles is to prevent outside interference in the life of the tribe. But there are those who sell forbidden things, and this is one of them.

The third is a conditional "bad guy" in the plot, in fact, he has a rather sad story. He, so to speak, lost the purpose of his whole life and blamed the Writers of Fates for this.

[dysfunctional-lego-ninja]

Watching Ninjago With My Parents But Mostly My Mom - Episodes 3-6

Okay so I’m scrapping the reblog method for updating this silly little commentary series, and it’s not gonna be weekly because watching Ninjago has become kinda sporadic at this point - but I will be going with four episodes per update, so yeah here’s the update for Episodes 3-6 (however I’m questioning why on earth the first post got 93 notes, but I’m glad people liked it!) Also my younger brother is rewatching the show with us so I may include some stuff from him too.

Episodes 3-4 (Snakebit and Never Trust A Snake) Okay my memory of this watch session is a bit rusty, so I have significantly less observations about this particular pairing of episodes.

So . . . pretty sure my mom liked it? Pretty sure she was honestly kind of tired during this watch session so I wasn’t able to get a lot of observations out of her XD She immediately pegged Ed and Edna as being from the Midwest and she seemed to like them (I mean who doesn’t, let’s be real). But the one thing that stood out to me was that she was eager to see Lloyd’s “metamorphosis” (her exact wording, btw) into the Green Ninja (she has no clue about the ageing up, that’s gonna be fun). So yeah - sorry to disappoint, I’m gonna try to keep better notes in between watch sessions since I usually write these on the second pair when my memories are fresh.

Episodes 5-6 (Can of Worms and The Snake King) Lots of observations on this one! So first off, when my brother and I were reading the Amazon Prime description of Can of Worms, we discovered that Amazon called the Venomari and Constrictai “the Vipoids and Constrictaurs”. Amazon strikes again with its fabulous misnomers and misspellings (looking at you description that spelled Nya with an I).

This episode definitely got laughs from my mom - Zane’s pink gi obviously being the highlight, as was Kai’s little run-in with Venomari spit. She did have to have me clarify that Pythor was “the British snake” (his voice reminds her of Bagheera from The Jungle Book), but at least she was able to keep track of his name. She wasn’t, however, quite as adept at keeping the other tribes and generals straight, so at her request, I’m going to be making a chart of the Serpentine for her to reference. The foodie side of her made a return appearance when she asked whether or not they had food pieces with the Destiny’s Bounty sets for the Ninja’s dinner scenes (which I would absolutely love, by the way, I love miniature foods. Also I realized how much I miss seeing the Ninja chilling around the dinner table, that was just a nice little grounding detail).

She surprised both my brother and I when she mentioned that, upon seeing the Samurai X mech make its first appearance in this episode, that she had been waiting for a mech to show up since she knows we own a lot of them. My brother moped a little about wanting the OG Samurai X mech (I don’t remember whether or not he has the Legacy one). And she, of course, being the analytical detective type of person that she is when it comes to TV shows (she and my dad watch a lot of murder mysteries so she’s constantly trying to outthink the protagonists), immediately started trying to figure out who Samurai X was.

Which leads into The Snake King, in which my mom was pretty convinced that Samurai X was Sensei Wu - she did think it was Nya a little bit when I started laughing at the idea of Wu being the samurai (which is honestly a brilliant concept and I legitimately might do something with that sometime) - but she was pretty sure it was Wu because of how quickly the samurai could get from place to place and the amount of skill he (or rather she) had. Both valid points, but she was accepting of the fact that it turned out to be Nya, although she also suggested that perhaps Wu might have trained Nya or helped her get to the level of skill she has. Which, frankly, I can totally vibe with that too because even though Nya is incredibly competent and probably picked up most of her skills by herself (and the tech is absolutely all her, Wu might be a cool boomer but he’s still a boomer), she’s been shown to need honing and fine-tuning, and Wu is the perfect teacher for that. So . . . maybe stay tuned for Samurai Wu AU (or training Samurai X Nya)?

Other little notes and interesting tidbits: during Can of Worms, my mom asked whether or not Jay and Kai get paired up a lot episode-wise (meaning are they teamed up with each other a lot when they’re split up, and whether they’ve got a closer friendship kind of thing). She was a little surprised when I told her that it’s usually Cole and Jay, but that that dynamic occurs later on (I have high hopes that she’ll stick it out long enough to get that far). My brother and I also wound up asking her which Ninja was her favorite so far, and neither of us were surprised when she answered with Zane, her main reasoning being that she thought he was the most unique of the four, calling him the “weird introvert”. (That’s absolutely endearing, she and I are both the same way XD). This then led to her asking why they had to make Zane a robot (don’t think she holds that against him though), and I explained the little story about that (his design + Brent Miller’s performance = robot rather than seer), which she found interesting.

Conclusion: she’s getting invested and my brother and I got a nostalgia trip again XD

Stay tuned for Episodes 7-10, hopefully in the near future!

[serpentfever]

Serpentine Headcanons: Part 1

I have decided to compile a list of personal headcanons regarding the serpentine. This probably will be the first in a collection of such, which will pertain both to the species as a whole, the different tribes, and the individuals.

So without further ado, let’s get started. 

General Headcanons

-A long long time ago, back when Ouroborus was still a thriving city, the serpentine DID have a legitimate ruler, in the form of a King or Queen. However, due to a variety of factors, this type of matriarchal leadership began to fall apart, and many of the tribes begun to fall under the rule of the Generals. This lead to the formation of more military based rule.

-To go along with the above statement, many young serpentine are indoctrinated into their military ranks at ages of around 13.

-Serpentine age pretty similar to humans, only slightly faster. Humans are generally considered to reach their sexual maturity around the age of 18-22 (With the human brain taking until about 25 to become fully developed). Meanwhile Serpentine reach theirs around 16, but after that their growth rate becomes greatly slowed down, and healthy serpentine can live well into 135.

-There is no sexual discrimination within the serpentine tribes. Both male and female, are expected to fight. Additionally, there is very little discrimination based on sexuality or gender. Many young snakes will go through a period in their life where they can come to decide what they define themselves as, which is universally called the Journey of Self, and begins around the age of 10. Nonbinary serpentine are common.

-Additionally, there is little sexual dimorphism between serpentine. However, true to real snakes, females are usually bigger.

This next headcanon is more like me looking at canon and deciding to politely ignore it. 

-The serpentine variations seen within the show are actually different biologically from the others. The modern serpentine also operate under a type of caste system to go alongside their military focused culture. This is why the denominations of scouts, soldiers, and warriors all consist of different looking snakes. Despite popular belief (aka what canon says), the snakes do not metamorphize when they rise in rank, this is only something the warriors who challenge the General will do, as the magical metamorphosis here only alters their legs. It is possible for quote on quote “scout class” serpentine to rise above their rank, but it is exceedingly rare.

-Despite the fact that the slither pit is generally seen as a brutal game with no laws, this is not the case. Generally, only snakes possessing the rank of warrior can challenge the General. Or at least, the general is only expected to respond to a challenge from a Warrior. It is generally seen as below the General to accept challenges from scouts or soldiers. 

-The serpentine all have their own regional dialects, as well as an older universal one. Despite the tribes having gone their separate ways long before the first Serpentine-Human War, they still teach their young the universal language. Many serpentine also know the human languages, but this is mostly those participating in the fighting, as it is useful to understand your enemy. Many civilians, especially after being trapped underground, don’t know any human.

There are two headcanons I have regarding the Serpentine Human War and the serpentine’s imprisonment:

-For one, the reason the humans locked not only the warring classes but also the civilians underground was due to propaganda and fear. Because serpentine are more physically adept than the average non-fighter human, with claws, fangs, and their respective tribal power, there was worry that even the civilians were too dangerous to simply be left alone.

-From here, one idea I had is that the elemental masters originally intended to release the serpentine eventually, and provided them with just enough rations to last them about 50 years. A war crime to put that many civilians in those harsh of conditions. They then hoped to indoctrinate the snakes into their own societies, keeping them on a tight leash so as to assure they wouldn’t try to instigate another war. The anacondrai were the exception to this rule, as, being the most dangerous of the serpentine, the elemental masters believed they were too dangerous to even risk the potential of them being released again, and purposely left them without rations. However, plans fell apart, and the serpentine were eventually forgotten

-My second theory is the one that the imprisonment was meant to be permanent, and the serpentine only got by for as long as they did by eating any bugs or small animals that managed to find their way into the tombs. This additionall means there were likely a lot more of all the tribes, but many of them died due to starvation. However, thanks to good leadership from the generals, most of the tribes were able to sustain at least part of their population thanks to good partitioning of resources. However, because the Anacondrais’ generals had been sent to the cursed realm, they had no such guidance, and quickly devolved into anarchy and cannibalism.

-In a similar vein to how the humans have myths and wives’ tales about the serpentine, so too do the serpentine have cautionary tales about humans. Most young serpentine children are terrified of the elemental masters for this reason, as unlike with many human myths about serpentine, the serpentine know the humans are real. And very dangerous.

Tribal Headcanons

-The Constrictai conserve their history through written records, as shown by the cave descriptions. They even have a rudimentary writing system.

-Aside from this, most of the other serpentine do not keep written records, and tell their tales through oral tradition. The Venomari are especially well known amongst the tribes for the way their culture celebrates storytelling, and they even have a whole sect of civilians dedicated to preserving it, called Gursas. These Gursas would often sing the stories they were taught, and the venomari would often put on festive displays, with music and dancing.

-The Hypnobrai are actually the only serpentine species with a natural resilience to the cold, do to the unusual presence of brown fat, a natural thermoregulatory in their bodies which is absent in most other serpentine.