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dreamsofbroflovski · 2 months ago

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Gunslinger!Kyle Broflovski x Reader - lovin' what your lovin' does to me

Also available on ao3!

Summary: You and your partner, Kyle Broflovski, are both gunslingers, roaming the United States on horseback looking for fights to pick and bounties to collect. But when the promise of a better life becomes clearer on your horizon, can you really go for it, change everything you know and take roots for the first time in your life? You find out in the best way possible.

Warnings: Wild West AU, Explicit Sexual Content, Explicit Language, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Mating Press, Breeding, Impregnation, Mentions of Pregnancy, Period-Typical Sexism

A/N: There it is. My however-many-thousand-words-long tribute to one of my favourite gingers.

Fun fact, I'm actually as childfree as they go. Got a whole list in my brain of reasons why I really shouldn't have kids. However, if a certain ginger jew from Jersey knocked at my door asking me to be the mother of his babies, I'd just ask "how many?" and get right to fucking work on that.

If some parts of it sound weird, I really did write this instead of sleeping because I wanted it up ASAP and it's crazy.

“Look alive, my dear. We’ve arrived.”

I was jolted out of my thoughts by the gentle voice of my partner.

It was nearing the middle of summer and I was really feeling the dog days. The sun showed me no mercy as it tried to set ablaze what little skin I had showing to the world, which was basically just my unprotected arms. I had been on horseback since dawn without even mentioning a break, and hadn’t exactly considered that the weather at 4am, before sunrise, might’ve been slightly different from what I was currently experiencing now that the sun was at its peak in the sky.

I guess the only salvation when it came to my foolishness was that I wasn’t alone in it. As I turned to the man at my side, matching my horse’s slow speed on his own mount, I saw him wipe some sweat off of his face with the green bandana he kept tied to his neck - being tortured by the heat even more than me, inside of his heavy leather coat.

My partner. My lover, Kyle Broflovski. Notorious gun-for-hire, same as I. We had met many years ago, when he and I were both just seventeen - but life had already taken its toll on the both of us, leaving nothing except two jaded young adults with very little to lose. By then we were already gunslingers, I was here and there committing petty thefts while he worked as a watchman for some merchant in the region. I took his side in a saloon fight that turned into a huge shootout - not proud to say a huge part of its escalation was his fault, but well, at least we won - and the thrill of going through a life-or-death situation together might’ve created a bond between us right at that moment, because from then on we rarely left each other’s side.

We started out merely as colleagues, but feelings quickly grew, and how wouldn’t they? He was handsome, intelligent, kind, honorable and great in bed. Everything a woman would want, if she ignored the ‘outlaw’ part, which I wouldn’t and didn’t even want to. Now, eight or nine years later, we still roamed this godforsaken country together - making money by offering protection services to basically anyone who needed bodyguards or an extra pair of shooters defending their property, and also by tracking wanted criminals and delivering their filthy bodies to the law enforcers looking for them; sometimes living, sometimes dead. Sometimes it felt like he kind of preferred it as the latter.

But as he looked back at me and I allowed myself to get lost in his shining eyes and jovial smile, it dawned on me that, at least for now, that was gone. We were on vacation, so to speak. For the last couple of weeks we had been on the road almost non-stop, all so that we could make it to our destination as quickly as possible.

Today’s leg of the trip had been rather quiet, save for the occasional snorting of one of our horses, but I liked it that way. After so many years with Kyle, I had come to enjoy even those moments of silence: we talked so much every single day, but even when we didn’t say anything I still felt comfort in just being by his side.

Plus, it had been the first time in a while that we managed to just not have to say anything. For the last year or so, we hadn’t been running by ourselves, instead making use of the connection and safety of a small group with other outlaws. Life with them was decent - we didn’t exactly love each other or keep any type of code, but we’d help wherever we could to make sure everyone’s lives were running smoothly. But it was very clear that my true loyalty was only to Kyle, and his to me.

So, when about nine months in he started to become visibly bothered and complain more, unhappy about having to set up shelter right next to people he didn’t exactly trust, we started planning our exit. We were used to it just being the two of us anyway, so there were no worries, we just had to plan the exit in a way that wouldn’t create a fuss. The opportunity came in the best way possible - a few weeks after our first talk of leaving, Kyle picked up at the post office a letter from his best friend, Stan Marsh, inviting us to go to his farm just one or two states away for a few days' stay. We left camp at night, after everyone was already asleep, and set out on this trip to meet up with the people we were most likely to actually consider family.

Kyle and Stan had known each other since before even being born, one could say. Randy Marsh and Gerald Broflovski were very close friends as children, though they followed very different paths in life: while my partner’s father took to the books and became a lawyer, the Marsh patriarch bought a plot of land not too far from the small mountain town where they lived and built a small but sturdy farm, which expanded over the years and made decent money. It was called Tegridy - apparently, it was supposed to be “Integrity”, a word Mr. Broflovski taught Mr. Marsh, but the latter didn’t really know how to write it; and, by the time he finally learned, it was already too late and the whole region already knew it by the wrong name, so it stuck.

And that’s how Kyle and Stan grew up: kept close as can be from the very start. Mr. Broflovski would take his family to the farmstead whenever he found a little free time and the boys spent their afternoons playing in the open fields, fishing in the stream nearby and helping Mr. Marsh with tasks around the farm once they became old enough. They saw each other turn from dim-witted boys to respectable young men, and the world seemed infinite for them, bright-eyed adolescents who could experience all the great things life had to offer without shouldering any of its burdens.

Unfortunately, just a few weeks before Kyle turned sixteen, his whole family was taken from him in a violent gang attack, caught in an ambush on the wagon they were riding while coming back from a trip, stripped of every valuable they had on hand and then shot dead. My partner wasn’t present at the time of the crime, so he was spared - something that he struggled with the guilt of for many years, and that was his primary motivation for becoming a vigilante: going after criminals just like those who wronged his family, to take them to justice and, more importantly, making sure their sentences were served.

When Kyle showed up at Stan’s doorstep for what would be his last conversation as a man without blood in his hands, it took a lot of arguing and convincing from Kyle for his friend to not immediately pack his bags, saddle up and ride alongside him. Stan eventually relented, settled for receiving Kyle’s letters and some rare visits, took over the farm and married a lovely young woman named Wendy Testaburger.

A lovely young woman who, turns out, hated Kyle and I’s guts fiercely. She came from a well-off household and left a comfortable life to be with Stan, so I guess having a pair of shabby gunslingers as the closest friends of her new family didn’t sit right with how she was raised. It also didn’t help that, every time we were around, Stan would drop everything he was doing and stick to us like a tick to a dog’s fur, asking Kyle non-stop about everything we were up to and making us fill him in on every single chase and shootout and bounty delivered, without leaving any stone unturned. His interest in the life was very noticeable, even if he tried to deny it during the multiple arguments we heard him have with Wendy when they thought we were sleeping. The new Mrs. Marsh was absolutely terrified that our constant presence would have a bigger impact on him the longer we stayed, and that someday our wicked ways would win Stan over and he’d ride off into the sunset with us and make her a widow - or, worse in her mind, a divorcée.

Her worries only waned after a particularly long stretch of time we spent at their place. Kyle had gotten badly injured in a shootout against one of our bounties - and, although my quick thinking managed to stabilize the situation to where he was no longer in danger, we still needed to lay low for a while as he healed, and sleeping on the dirt in tents moving from place to place was not it. So I found ourselves a wagon and showed up unannounced to the Marsh residence with Kyle and all of our belongings loaded on it.

My guess is seeing the dangers of the job in real time and how precarious our day-to-day life really was had been a wake-up call to Stan, since after that his begging for me and Kyle to retell our epic stories had diminished considerably. With this, Wendy was finally able to rest assured that she’d keep her husband, and she was willing to get to know us better and have actual positive interactions. At least something good came out of that whole mess - to this day, Kyle’s left shoulder didn’t work as good as it used to, and he still felt this overwhelming pain at random times.

That is all to say the four of us had a very strong bond forged through years of experiences together, delights and torments shared - a bond that would never waiver even when Kyle and I were on the other side of the country cleaning up the trash and delivering bounties around the most different jurisdictions. So, when we received that letter with Stan and Wendy scolding us because we hadn’t seen them since before the lady got pregnant with their fourth and urging us to come back to Colorado for she was now on the last leg of that pregnancy, we figured it was the least we could do to pack our stuff and ride to Tegridy Farm to spend a few weeks with the Marsh family, helping wherever they needed to make sure that these last couple of days, or the few right after childbirth, would go as smoothly as possible.

It had been about two or three weeks that we had been on the road now and we were finally at our destination. To my side, the very familiar farm spanned across the land, its decent area determined by some flimsy wooden fences in need of fixing. The structures and inside the boundaries of the fence for the most part didn’t match its state of neglect; the cultivation fields with the seasonal crops were well-kempt, the stables and barn had a regular repair schedule, and the main house - the crown jewel of the property - stood elegant in the middle of it all, always clean and pristine courtesy of Wendy’s presence. The only other thing that might’ve seemed neglected in the farm was but a shadow behind the main building - the old house where Stan had lived during his childhood, which hadn’t been inhabited since his mother died, but that he also didn’t seem to have the courage or time to take down completely.

As we crossed the wooden gateways and made our way inside the farm, the first member of the Marsh family to notice our arrival was actually their elderly chubby dog, Sparky. Stan originally bought him as a puppy to train so he would protect the animals and the land from intruders, but he quickly realized that this dog was a huge wimp and just wanted to play all day, promptly fleeing whenever he sensed danger. However, everyone had already taken a liking to the tiny fellow by then, so he became Wendy and Stan’s personal companion, sleeping inside of the main house and growing up alongside the kids as their pet. When he saw the outlines of us on top of our mounts riding towards the building, he started barking happily and ran as fast as his legs could take him, making a turn when he got to our horses and matching their pace alongside Kyle’s.

His barking must’ve alerted the other members of the household, since not long after he started, we noticed Stan getting up off his chair on the porch. “And look who’s finally here!” He announced as he walked towards us with open arms and, not long after, we saw Wendy’s smiling face appear in one of the second-story windows, her hand waving excitedly out of it as we approached in our steeds.

“Oh, come on, we didn’t take that long.” Though he had essentially just been scolded, Kyle had a glowing smile on his face. Just this moment made almost all the tiring parts of travel worth it, to see how glad my partner would get to see his brother after so long and realize that nothing had changed. To have those moments of his youth back, even if for just a short stay.

“Almost a whole year, Kyle!” Stan retorted, slapping the side of his friend’s arm with his raised hand. “Wait a little more and you might as well have come for the kid’s wedding by then.”

Our mounts slowed to a stop as we reached the front porch, and we heard the thundering noise of several footsteps bolting down the stairs inside. Before we could even dismount, the smiling faces of Stan’s two eldest children - a boy and a girl - ran towards our horses, shouting excitedly and asking questions too quickly and with too high-pitched voices for me to even begin answering them.

“Easy now, children.” A much more soft and pleasant voice managed to be picked up by my ears among the ruckus, and my eyes darted towards the door immediately. Wendy Marsh stood by the doorway, her current youngest child - just shy of two years, if I had my math right - hiding behind her legs. My best friend had one of her hands resting on top of her belly, bump visible even under the loose-fitting maternity dress she wore, and I felt the guilt strike at me on sight; It had been too long since we last saw these two, she had gone through all those changes to her body and mind across multiple months, while I was off somewhere shooting people. I felt like an awful friend.

And then she did something that reminded me exactly how she was more than capable of handling this situation by herself. “YOU DARNED LITTLE RASCALS! SHUT UP THIS INSTANT AND LET YOUR AUNT AND UNCLE SPEAK!” This bellowing, infuriated version of Wendy’s voice had the kids fixing their postures and closing their mouths in an instant, not even daring to breathe loudly anymore, and they gave us one last glance before sprinting back quickly inside the house. The toddler followed suit, waddling after its siblings as fast as its tiny legs could carry it.

With the coast now clear, Kyle quickly slid off of his horse, in a swift movement that only comes with years of doing that multiple times a day. I stayed on top of mine, however, and right after dismounting Kyle made his way to the side of my steed, raising his arms towards me. I turned my whole body to his side and let Kyle take hold of my waist, lifting me off the saddle and putting me on the ground with ease. I was more than perfectly capable of getting out on my own, I had as much experience with this as he did - but this was something he fancied doing, he wanted to be a gentleman whenever he could and there weren’t many opportunities in our daily life for him to fill that role, so he loved to have that little moment and I learned to appreciate it. Plus, he’d get fussy if I didn’t let him do it, so I humored him every single time.

“C’mon, Wends, no need for that,” I turned to her as my boots hit the dirt, “Stan’s right, it’s been so long. They’re kids, they’re just happy to see us.”

“Well, but they’re not giving you a hug before I do!” And she didn’t have to wait any longer, wrapping her arms tightly around me as soon as Kyle let go of my waist and moved his body out of the way. I hugged her back carefully, trying not to put any pressure on her belly, something that she didn’t seem a lick concerned about but kind of worried me a little bit. I heard my partner’s boots kicking the pebbles beneath its soles as he power walked towards Stan to give him a hug as well - although in their case it was more of a side hug, slapping the palm of their hands against the other’s backs amidst laughter. The type of salute men usually shared, not as tender as the displays of friendship between us women, but just as heartfelt.

After a minute or two like this, Wendy let go of me and gave me one last warm smile before going over to Kyle and giving him a quick hug, and I took the opportunity to do the same to Stan. Even if we weren’t as close as him and Kyle, he was still like family to me. We didn’t linger on the greeting, though; My best friend could get quite possessive when other women were near her man, even if it was just me, and I wasn’t gonna make that lady angry if I could avoid it.

I swiftly took my spot next to Kyle again, and Wendy did the same near Stan. “You’re looking gorgeous, Wends,” I stated with a smile. “Really glowing!”

“(Y/N)’s right. Baby number four, too! Stan, you must be proud!” Kyle stretched his arm out and placed his hand on Stan’s shoulder, shaking him teasingly. Stan just laughed and shoved his friend’s hand away from him, but when he straightened his stance again, his chest seemed a little more out than usual and his chin a little more high up. With his pride visible like this, I couldn’t help but be reminded of a rooster, or a peacock with its feathers all spread out.

“Thank you so much, you two. You’re really sweet,” Wendy wrapped her arms around her husband, hugging him from the side, face as happy as could possibly be - but then those smiles turned into a pout. “But don’t think being sweet is going to redeem you! You’ve barely written to us these months! We’ve been worried sick!”

“Good thing we’re here now to tell you all about what we didn’t write,” Kyle said as he walked back near our steeds. ”Just let me hitch the horses somewhere out of the sun. I won’t be long.”

“No need.” Before we could take action, Stan quickly put two fingers to his mouth and whistled loudly, catching the attention of a nearby farmhand passing through, who stopped in his tracks and beelined to us. It was a young man, couldn’t be older than eighteen, with tanned skin from the hours under the sun, strong arms and a serious expression. “Oi, Milton. Take these horses here, lead them to the stables with the others and give them some water. Ah, and make sure they’re fed, they’ve been hours on the road.”

Milton gave a quick nod and took our horses by the reins, leading them slowly towards a big building to the left of the house. We followed him with our eyes for a couple of seconds, in silence. “Well, anyway, let’s take this conversation inside as well,” Wendy suggested, gesturing with her arm towards the house, her expression softening. “I’m sure y’all don’t want to wait out in this sun any more than the horses did.”

And she was damn right. We excused ourselves in and went through the doorway, sighing in relief as we found ourselves in the shade at last. “No issues on the travel, I assume?” She asked with a smile as Kyle took his hat off and put it in the hanger next to Stan’s.

“Just a tiny quarrel with the sheriff last town back, nothin’ major.” It had actually been a little bit more than that, but we didn’t want to worry our friends. The sheriff, an extremely unpleasant fellow who spent more of his time harassing the local ‘working girls’ than actually doing his job, seemed to have a real problem when people who actually wanted to stop crime came along. So, when we showed up to the town with a local thief tied up on the back of Kyle’s horse - captured in an extremely convenient encounter nearby - the so-called law enforcer decided we were ‘trying to come for his position’ and threw the tantrum of a lifetime looking for any reason to have us arrested. Luckily no guns were drawn, we left as quickly as we arrived, but the stress of the whole situation still stuck to us for a couple miles after that.

“Fuuuuck, I hate that feller. Please tell me you beat his ass.” Though Stan apparently had tried to make his dislike of the sheriff known only to Kyle, he did so in a rather loud tone, which made us all turn to him. “Short fat motherfucker loves to pull on my dick whenever I’m in town for anything. Pisses Wendy off, too. Damn failed abortion is what he is.”

“Language, Stanley!” Wendy chided, glaring at him. We heard a couple of giggles, quickly suppressed, and I turned my face upwards - on the second floor, leaning on the balustrade near the staircase, the children gathered, looking down at us and listening in on our conversation.

Kyle and I could only bend over ourselves laughing as the heavily pregnant Wendy chased upstairs, going after her much faster children to try and give them a thorough scolding as they yelled out their brand new vocabulary, while Stan made sure to quickly leave the scene so as to make it harder for himself to be next.

Oh to live this life on the daily.

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

The rest of the afternoon went by without any issues. Kyle and I managed to take our first proper bath in days, which was extremely appreciated, and then our attention was almost immediately snatched by the Marsh children. My guess was they didn’t get many visitors on the farm, at least not many that were interested in hearing what small kids have to say, so now that they had people to talk to they were sure to teach us all the new things they had learned and play lots of different games with uncle and auntie.

With evening approaching, Wendy prepared some roast beef with mashed potatoes and fried red tomatoes with garlic, along with a whole apple pie for dessert - under the pretext that since guests were over they had the obligation of making more food to be sure we wouldn’t starve, and maybe spend a little more on the process. She knew Kyle and I would be fine with whatever she prepared, her cooking was so good she could probably boil tree bark on her stove and make it the best meal we ever had, so I knew the sizeable dinner was more a satisfaction of her pregnant whims. We all ate until we almost couldn’t fit in our pants anymore, and after the couple put their kids to bed, Stan brought out a nicer wine and we chatted our more mature matters well into the night.

After a while, Stan and Kyle decided to go out for a smoke and a night walk around the property, leaving me and Wendy to clean up the dinner mess so that we could ‘talk about our feminine issues’, whatever that meant. So we picked up the dirty tableware and took everything to the kitchen, where she had previously set up two buckets - one with warm water and soap, one with clean water - for the dishes.

After we set everything on the counter and she tried taking another step going for the filled buckets, I immediately put my body in front of her, blocking her next steps. “No no no, little mama!”, I declared, putting both my hands on Wendy’s shoulders and pushing her slowly towards the smaller table in the kitchen, which they used for breakfast. “You’ve already done too much today and been on your feet all this time. Now it’s my turn.”

She tried huffing, stomping her foot and going around me, but my grip on her shoulders was strong enough that she couldn’t, so she bitterly relented and took a seat on one of the flimsy brown chairs near the table. “I’m pregnant, not disabled”, I heard her snort behind my back as I finally let go of her and turned towards the pile of dirty dishes.

“I know, I know,” was my reply while I picked up the first dirty plate and dunked it into the soapy water. “But you made this whole dinner for us and it was delicious, Wends. Lemme do this for you, will ya?”

“You helped with the fried tomatoes,” she retorted.

“Sure, but I’m not the one with a whole baby inside me.”

She giggled. “Not yet.”

My hand stopped in the air halfway through grabbing a dirty wine glass. “Come again?” I inquired as I turned to her with raised eyebrows.

“You tell me, (Y/N)! Ever since before I met you you’ve been running from place to place shooting people for money. Don’t you think it’s time you and Kyle settled down, bought a house somewhere? Maybe you two could even get married and finally stop living in sin.”

Her comment had me rolling my eyes, but I still let out a chuckle; the Marshs weren’t all that religious by any means, and Wendy was a particularly outspoken proponent of women’s right to choose how they wanted to live, so I knew she was just taking a jab. “You have no right to use that against me, miss,” I pointed a soapy wet index finger at her, “Not when I know all about what you and Stanley were up to before your daddy let you get hitched.” It was true and she knew it. After we finally became close friends, I was Wendy’s main confidant, and she’d told me all about her relationship to Stan prior to the marriage - tales in great detail about the different places where they met and spent the night together in secret when they were younger. They had lived basically a whole second relationship together away from prying eyes, and the only people who knew about it were within the same mile radius right now.

Hearing this, she smirked and lifted her left hand close to her face, so I could clearly see the back, and I knew then and there that she’d had the last laugh. “And it worked.” With her other hand, she pointed towards her left ring finger, and there was no pretending I hadn’t noticed the shiny golden wedding band she always kept polished to perfection.

Although we had been partnered all those years and were as close as two souls can be, legally Kyle and I weren’t married. We reckoned there was no need, we already spent every single moment together, putting ourselves in danger for each other during the day and sleeping in the same tent at night. Take away the expensive ceremony and we’re husband and wife. Plus, weddings were usually very religious affairs, and not only were we both very distant from that reality, there was also the tiny fact that we were well-known gunslingers (no matter how lawful we thought ourselves to be, killing someone, even a criminal, is still a cardinal sin) and I’m sure your usual religious leaders aren’t willing to officiate for people like that.

And then there was the matter of children. I had always wanted them, it was one of my plans for life, but I had pushed that aside the moment I picked up a gun for the first time. Kyle and I didn’t keep residence on the same spot for too long - we’d lived places, worked for people for a while, but nowhere that we could actually safely stay for years on end. Our normal life was that of setting camp everywhere, to avoid being tracked by any enemies we made along the way, having to move extremely quickly - and sometimes even that wouldn’t be enough and we’d have to face conflict head-on. We could never do that with a child in our arms, it would be a recipe for disaster. Besides, with my age, I just felt too old for them at this point; all the mothers my age had their kids way earlier and it felt weird to start now, like I wouldn’t have anything in common with them. That ship had sailed.

I knew all of that and I was alright with it. My love for Kyle didn’t need no overpriced dress or ring to be real, and we didn’t need kids to have a real family. Hell, so many couples go through that whole song and dance of getting married only to end up cheating and abusing each other beyond belief! If that’s what marriage is, then I don’t want any part of it, thank you very much. We were doing fine.

So it was the little girl inside of me that felt that little stab of jealousy seeing Wendy’s shiny jewelry and huge belly - the little girl that did grow up flipping through wedding catalogs to see the pretty dresses, that spent her childhood thinking of the names she’d give for her future children and hearing stories about young ladies who met their Prince Charmings and lived their happily ever after, before life took its turns and made her into a killer. This little girl would’ve loved to have a house and kids, and would’ve taken Wendy’s offer in half a heartbeat, but she didn’t have the right to live anymore.

So as it came, it went. I went back to the dishes, acting like this conversation hadn’t affected me any more than our other casual chats during the day. “Wendy, we can’t,” I said as I splashed a handful of forks inside of the now cold water, “We’re gunslingers, in case you forgot. We don’t have a house like you and Stan do. Ya think a child should grow up living like we do? That ain’t fair.”

I heard the drag of her chair as she got up from it and moved towards me, but before I could turn to tell her to sit down again, she had already closed the distance between us with very quick steps. “You don’t have to live like you do.” She grabbed my right hand between hers and looked me in the eyes in a way that seemed almost like she was pleading. “We told you already. There’s the old house in the back you can take, it just needs some fixing up, Stan would be glad to do it. The kids love having you around, you can help care for them and if you have some we can help too, they can grow up together-”

“Wendy, we’re not gonna live on your farm!”, I interjected before she could go any further in her crazy rambles. Rambles that it wasn’t my first time hearing about - both in letters and in person, she’d sometimes go on about how we should create roots and start a family somewhere nice, while underlining how the farm had all this space and needed more workers and the kids could use a few more friends… “This is y’all’s house. We ain’t gonna impose on your life like that.” I wriggled my hand away from hers. ”And gunslingin’s our job, it’s all we know to do. We wouldn’t know how to live like you do. So just drop it, please.”

She patted her now free hand against her dress to dry it and didn’t seem to want to look at me anymore. “The beauty of being alive is that you can learn.” I heard her say meekly, which made me feel extremely bad that I had been so firm with her when she was so excited about her ideas - but I didn’t want to give her hope, or rather, give myself more hope by listening to her.

I reached to pick up another dirty dish from the pile, but my hand grabbed at nothing. While giving Wendy’s babbles my undivided attention, I had mechanically done all of the washing, now everything just needed to be dried and put away. But, as I stretched my arm out to grab a clean dish towel, it was her time to stop me in my tracks. “I’ll take it from here.” She declared as she reached for the rag before I could and snatched it out of my range. When she heard me gasp and scramble for a rebuttal, she added: “No buts, you must be tired, y’all were on the road all morning and then the kids were also a handful. You’re done for the night.”

“I ain’t going to bed anyway,” I noted, “If you want me to do nothing then I’ll stay here with you ‘till you’re done.”

“Don’t worry about me. It’ll be quick, I’ll dry this all off, and then I’ll go out to call the dog back inside anyway, might as well give the men a shout to come to bed too.” She shrugged as she picked up a wet plate.

I honestly wanted to argue a bit more and not leave her alone like that, but my aching back was very interested in what she suggested - I had spent my whole morning on the back of a horse and then the whole afternoon chasing after zippy children. I sighed in defeat and nodded, earning from her an earnest smile. “Very well then, but tomorrow everything’s on me. Don’t wanna see you up and about before noon, understood? Good night.”

I turned on my heels to leave, hearing her giggle behind me. “Sure thing, (Y/N).” I started walking out of the kitchen, but just then she uttered: “Just… Think about what I said, alright? Good night.”

I looked back over my shoulder to see if she was going to say or do anything else, but her back was already turned to me, as she stared at the window above the counter, watching over her property.

I suppose I ended up doing what she last told me to do in the end, because our little chat really stuck with me through the next minutes.

༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩♡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚

Even after all the time I spent getting myself prepped for bed, Kyle still hadn’t returned by the time I was done with it. So I picked up a book from Wendy’s collection - reading was one of her main hobbies, growing up educated as she was, and she kept it up even after moving to the farm - and cozied up under the blanket of the guest room bed. I was happy to have something different to read this time; Kyle and I had a couple books with us, we liked to read whenever we had the free time, but it’s God awful having too many things when you’re always moving from place to place, so we kept our assortment to a minimum. Turns out it’s very easy to get annoyed at a book when it’s the only one you ever read, and those I had in my bag were starting to become a real eyesore.

This one I had in my hand I’d never seen before, but the cover was nice enough and the summary got me on its hook, so I was pretty intrigued. It was this fictional story about an outlaw who got diagnosed with a terminal disease and spent the rest of his life trying to atone for his sinful deeds, while also uncovering some truths about the people he was most close to. Without even realizing, even during the first paragraphs, I had grown attached to the main character - his sorrow as he looks back at what he managed to do with his life, when he remembers all the bad things he has done that brought him to his current situation, and the way he tries to change and make the lives of those he loves as easy as possible with the time he has left.

It put me into deep thought rather fast. That character managed to change everything about his life, his core beliefs and priorities, when faced with the inevitability of death. He didn’t think he could, in his mind he was doomed to be nothing more than the sins he committed, and to pay for them when the time came for that - but, although he didn’t manage to live the happily ever after everyone wants out of life, he still managed to protect those he loved and leave an everlasting mark on the people around him.

‘The beauty of being alive is that you can learn,’ Wendy’s voice echoed in my mind again, teasing me with promises of a better life. Maybe it wasn’t too late for me and Kyle to change. We had something most others in our line of work didn’t have the luxury of - we had people willing to help us. But then again, did Kyle and I want to be helped? We had never considered such an option besides drunkenly debating those hypotheticals every once in a blue moon. It was possible that he didn’t even want something like this, and I’d rather bite my tongue out and never speak again than do so and lose him forever over it.

The sudden squeak of the ancient guest room door opening shoved me right out of the depths of my brain into the real world. Kyle was back from his long walk, whistling absentmindedly some random tune he probably picked up at a saloon. The rather acid stench that usually accompanied someone who had just smoked didn’t enter alongside him, and that I was glad for; He had obviously taken the time to air himself out and get all the smell out of his body before coming back in. I wondered if Stan had the same care towards his pregnant wife. “Sorry I took so long, Stan just wanted to show me the new horses and we ended up going for a ride on them.”

“No problem. I found myself something to do anyway.” I closed the book in my lap and lifted it briefly to show him the cover, before setting it on the nightstand, as far as I could from the candle that was also on top of it.

“You’ve gotta tell me what this one is about later.” He sat down on the narrow bench in front of the bed and began taking off his boots. “Did you and Wendy have fun together?”

“Sure thing, it was real nice”, I answered, “Lotsa great talking about our feminine issues and stuff. What about you, macho man?”

My voice carried a hint of sarcasm that he picked up on immediately. He turned his body slightly so he could look at me. “Sorry about that, I guess.” He rolled his eyes. “But you know you and Wendy don’t have the same kind of conversations Stan and I do. That’s what we meant.”

“I know, I know, I’m just playing with ya.” The reassurance that I wasn’t actually mad at him or his friend for the earlier comment made him relax a little. He turned his back to me again and started unbuttoning his shirt as I kept talking. “We really had a nice talk, her and I. It feels so good to be back here.”

“You don’t know how happy I am to hear that. Let’s make the most of the next days then.”

As he got up from the bench to remove his pants, I took the opportunity to take a good look at his body. Kyle had a very lean build, it was quite hard for him to gain weight and build those big muscles some other guys had, but he was by no means weak; doing stuff at camp, handling bandits to bring them to jail and the exercise it all took made him a very fit guy who could stand his ground even without a gun. He was also quite pale, at least for someone who spent almost all his time outside, and had plenty of freckles peppered all around his soft skin. I remembered Milton again, the farmhand Stan hired, and wondered if working on a farm every day under the sun would make Kyle look like that too - I hoped not, I loved my partner the way he was, didn’t want him to change a thing. But I knew it wouldn’t: After many summers together, the only thing I ever saw the sun do to Kyle was make him redder than a tomato all over, and his skin would usually start peeling a day or two later, which was why he preferred to wear long sleeved shirts even in the hotter months.

There they were, the thoughts of being on the farm again. I blinked and focused my blurry eyes on Kyle again. He had stopped undressing. “Everything alright, honey?”, he inquired, looking at me with a frown.

“Ya, it’s nothin’. Just thinkin’ ‘bout how handsome my man is ‘s all.”, I was quick to answer. He shook his head with a smirk and, without answering, went back to taking off his undergarments.

When he was fully in the nude, he made his way towards the bed, not bothering to put on any sort of sleepwear. In that, he matched me - besides the bedding, there was nothing covering my body. This was normal for us: there was literally no part of our bodies that the other hadn’t seen, so why bother hiding anything? Besides, it made everything so much easier when we didn’t have to spend time ridding ourselves of all that fabric before making love. It had made for some embarrassing situations in the past, where we had to jump straight out of our beds, guns drawn, prepared for trouble; but, no matter how much we told ourselves that we really needed to stop being lazy and start wearing our pajamas, we’d still lay down the next night in our birthday suits, because there was no shame anyone else could make us feel that was more important than the feeling of his warm skin against mine.

“But you wanna know what’s funny?” Kyle commented as he pulled up the covers on the right side of the bed to lay down beside me, “Stan asked me again what I thought of the old house. Said this time we’re not getting away.”

Him bringing this up came as a shock - my eyes widened and I felt a cold shiver run down my spine. Was this man a seer or something? How come he knew to bring up exactly the thing that was eating at my mind the whole night?

I managed to keep my cool and let out a laugh that might’ve sounded a bit too loud for comfort. “Wendy did the same thing to me!”, I yelped, “The way they talk about this with us you’d think they were tryna sell us the farm.”

“They really want us to move in.” He let out a deep exhale as his head hit the feather pillow after a whole day with very little rest. “And he did say Wendy would talk to you and have you hooked on it. That by the end of the year you’d have ‘a bun in the oven’ and I’d finally know the joys of being a father.”

“I’m sure it was just the wine talking. You know Stan’s a major lightweight.” Again with my deflecting. The truth was I didn’t want to give away that Wendy’s suggestions were slowly building a nest in my heart, because I knew it couldn’t stay. Maybe joking around a bit with Kyle would remind me of the situation we were in, that this idyllic little house life we led was only temporary, and that we were bound to go back on the road after a few days, in search of more work. All I couldn’t do was make my current interest too overt, and I would forget about it just fine.

“Eh, I don’t know… He seemed pretty serious to me. Not like he does when he’s drunk, and I’d know that.” He turned on his side, facing me, and I could see the reflection of my candle’s flame dancing inside his olive eyes as he stared intently. Either he was really captivated by it, or he didn’t want to look at me for some reason, and that made me even more worried. He stayed like this for a couple of minutes, during which the room fell to almost complete silence, only broken by the crickets outside or the occasional cackling of the tiny flame. “And… What did you think?” Kyle finally asked, lifting his face toward me, studying my features just in case they gave a different answer than the one that would come from my mouth. “About what Wendy said, I mean.”

“Hey, now, what I thought doesn’t matter.” It was now my turn to look away and stare at the flame, wanting to just blow it out and dunk the room in darkness, all to not continue this conversation. “You know it’s just silly daydreams she has. They don’t get out as often as they used to, with the children and whatnot, so she stays inside and comes up with stuff like this.”

Kyle rapidly sat himself up in the bed and cupped my face in his hands, turning it so that we could finally be looking at each other. “You know your thoughts are the only ones that matter to me.” He stated firmly, gazing into my eyes with even more certainty than that which he had in his voice. “I don’t care about what Stan or Wendy want. But if you have something to say, you have my full attention, no matter what it is.”

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, bringing my right hand up and resting it on top of his. It was fine. I knew I couldn’t just lie to Kyle here, he’d figure me out. And, with all his brains, surely he could come up with a logical explanation for my troubles and help me see the most sensible path. “Look, I’m sure they mean well and it’s such a pretty idea”, I started, “I’d love to do that if our lives were different. But as it is it wouldn’t stick, honey. There’s no point in pretendin’.”

“Why wouldn’t it?”

I expected all sorts of reactions from Kyle, but not this one. His hand withdrew from my face as he pulled his upper body slightly away from me, but still kept his stare fixed. Both his eyebrows were raised and his eyes were wide, and his mouth fell slightly open as he breathed through it. He looked like someone would if they heard something they didn’t want to, or received disappointing news; which wasn’t how he usually reacted to those situations - Kyle was the type to argue his point to the bitter end, so disagreements usually came with a lot more anger instead of sadness or anxiety. This time, he seemed hurt.

“Oh, honey… You know why.” I rested my hands on top of my chest, feeling my heart accelerate, and trying to ground myself before the shock became too much. “We can’t put a child in a world like ours. Would be torture.”

He shook his head. “It wouldn’t be a world like ours. We can live here, at least temporarily, and then we move somewhere else. Stan already gave us the go.”

“Kyle, you know we have targets on our backs!” I tried moving my body closer to his, like that might get the point across easier, my voice denouncing my increasing concern with his reaction. “All these people we sent to swing, their buddies always try to come after us. Stan and Wendy don’t deserve this. We can’t risk them.”

“How? We’re in the middle of bumfuck nowhere!” There it was, the anger flaring his nerves. It always happened when something hit close to his heart, he felt the need to explain himself and make the people around him ‘see reason’ - I knew that behavior too well, though I wasn’t normally on the receiving end of it. But right now this wasn’t about logic or reason. These were his wishes. “We’ll disappear. I’ll change my name, you’ll change yours, we fake our deaths, these people don’t remember anything anymore after a couple of months anyway!”

Although I kept on nervously laughing, he was hitting all the right points, the points my own heart made when it wanted to feed on the delusions for a while longer. Kyle was very good at that - if he thought something was the better option, he’d twist both Heaven and Hell to make it make sense. “Oh yes? Well, say we go through with it, what do we know about ranch life?” I let out another nervous laugh. “Can you plant anything? Feed cattle?”

“Does that even matter?” In a quick movement, he climbed on top of me, knees at the side of my thighs as he straddled my legs, the blanket draping from his shoulders since he didn’t bother getting out from under it. We didn’t break eye contact for a single second. “You know I learn fast. If I-You want this, then we can figure it out!”

Clarity struck me like a bullet. Did he just say ‘I’? “Stan… Didn’t really talk to you about anything, did he?”

He shook his head again, less enthusiastically this time, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “Do you remember a couple months ago, after you and I left the gang, when we talked about life with a house and kids and what we’d do if we had that?” I nodded, before realizing that he couldn’t see the gesture anyway - but he took my silence as agreement and continued talking. “I sent Stan a letter soon after. At first it was just to vent, but then he replied with their suggestion and I thought… Well, we could at least try.” The end of his sentence brought with it a faint smile to his lips, and he opened his eyes again slowly.

For the first time in this conversation had my little fit of laughter been genuine. The three of them had put all this in motion right under my nose, based on one wishful conversation we had, which Kyle had taken to heart and made sure to come to fruition. “I thought you liked the hunt, though” I said, head tilting to the side. “Liked bringin’ people to justice an’ givin’ ‘em what they deserved, no?”

“I like that, but I love you.” He answered without missing a beat. Felt like he was plain waiting for it. “And besides, it’s not like we can’t be virtuous people and do what’s right even without spending all our lives chasing after criminals. Our honor comes from our hearts, not from the barrel of our guns.”

Good ol’ Kyle with his smooth way of talking. It was one of the many reasons I fell for him - though his day-to-day life was rough and he shot outlaws for a living, deep inside he was still a very caring man, someone intelligent who saw all the bad in the world and still chose to do good. “Where did you even learn to talk like that?” I chuckled. “You shoulda been a writer, not a shooter.”

“Who knows? Maybe I’ll get started on that now, since I’ll have more time.” Taking my hands in his, he kissed my knuckles lovingly. Then his thumb grazed my empty left ring finger, his touch, as soft as his rough hands would allow it, lingering for a couple of seconds. “After the wedding, that is.”

“Wait, you serious?” This night was getting so filled with surprises, I might just believe someone if they said Sparky was a human in disguise. “No need for that, my dear. I’m already yours.”

“But I want to do it.” His hands let go of mine and he moved his body closer to me, giving me a quick peck to the forehead. Then he suddenly grabbed the blanket and yanked it to the side, throwing it on the floor and leaving both our bodies completely exposed. “And we gotta do it quick, before you start to show.”

Before I could ask him what I’d start to show, he pulled me by the shoulders and smashed his lips against mine fiercely. My hands shot up to grab his curls, making him groan into my mouth and deepen the kiss - and there it was, the now faint taste of the cigar I hadn’t smelled previously, spicy and earthy, but it tasted like the sweetest thing on the planet just because of the sheer passion we shared right now.

As I felt Kyle’s hand drift up from between us to knead at my breast, I broke the kiss with a gasp. “Wait, here?” I asked, surprised, though the corners of my mouth curved up, snitches of my excitement.

“Now.”, he declared, straightening his legs and propping himself up in his arms to give me space to slide down and lay beneath him, with my head now on the pillow and my legs spread. When I broke eye contact for just a second and finally looked down, I saw his dick was already almost fully hard - was the simple idea of getting me pregnant enough to make him like that?

“Can’t wait to see how you’re gonna explain this to them tomorrow” I said with a giggle as Kyle lowered his body, putting his weight on his elbows, and planting kisses all over my face. My subdued laughs quickly got replaced by soft hums as he started going down the side of my neck with his lips, while his hips started rocking against mine, his cock grinding against my body and the tip spreading some warm precum over my lower abdomen with each slow movement.

His answer, unlike most everything he ever said, was simple, direct, and left no leeway for questioning. “Well, it would do them some good to get used to it.” I felt my face burn like the damn candle as he said that, and my pussy starting to drip with wetness, the arousal soaking into the bedsheet. He stopped his kisses for a moment to put his mouth to my ear, and when he whispered his next declaration, it felt like it was going straight to my cunt: “Because I’m keeping you filled up now. Make you mine all the time and no one can do a damn thing about it.”

“Oh, you gonna change your mind when I’m all big and swollen…”, I drawled feebly. Disputing his claims was getting hard now since my brain was getting foggy with desire, but I still had to try, even if just to hear him singing praises to me some more.

I felt his left hand coursing through my body, stopping with his palm flat on my midriff, feeling almost cold with how hot I was getting all over. “Absolutely not,” He whispered again, “You’re gonna be even more fucking gorgeous when you’re carrying my child. I’ll make love to you every single night.”

My hand started to move down between our bodies, too, as I tried to reach for Kyle’s throbbing cock, wanting to make him feel good - if I couldn’t with pretty words like he did me, at least I knew I could do it with actions. But, when my fingers touched his leaking tip, he immediately took his hand off my belly and gripped my wrist, moving it back to the side of my body. As I looked at him with a puzzled expression on my face, he simply shook his head, gave me another peck to the mouth and started pushing himself down on the bed, only stopping when his face was level with my pussy and his palms were flat at the side of my hips.

Just by seeing him there, I could feel my walls clenching around nothing, almost like they begged on their own for his loving and experienced touch. Kyle was a damn great lover and from the very first day we laid together it was like he knew all the right ways to make me come undone, and he had no shame about anything he did to achieve it - most of all, he was eager to do it. By God did this man love to please me. If that was what was waiting for me every night from now on, I could very easily get used to everything else.

He started planting small kisses on the inside of both of my thighs as he pushed my legs slowly up, my knees now almost hitting my chest. His lips felt soft and endearing on my skin, but this was not where I wanted them - and he knew it, with the way he held my gaze the whole time as he did it, his eyes glittering with his teasing ways. Every few kisses, he’d break the sequence with a slight graze of his teeth on my skin, the softest of bites, but enough to make all the fine hairs in my thigh rise up in a pleasurable goosebump.

Just as I was getting tired of the wait and was contemplating pulling at his hair to bring him away from my leg, it was like he had read my mind again. He let go of my thighs and put his hands on my hips, not quite gripping them, but steadying them in place. I closed my eyes and sighed contentedly as he licked a stripe from my already very wet cunt to my clit, giving it a very quick kiss at the end, which made me wonder for a second if he was about to start teasing me again and how long for. But then all thoughts left my brain as soon as he started swirling his tongue over my clit, in a pattern I didn’t know or care about, making me squirm almost immediately and dig my nails into my palm.

His tongue slithered down, making its way to my entrance, and my hips started rolling against his mouth, trying to help his movements as he fucked me with it. He’d grunt every now and then as he did it, lost in the satisfaction he felt by pleasuring me, and sending the vibrations through my heat, making me even wetter. I could feel him staring at me from down there, too, despite my shut eyes; He always paid attention to every reaction of mine, licking and sucking all the right parts that he knew made me squirm.

Then he moved up with his mouth to focus on my clit again and my hands darted down to grab at his hair, my palms hurting at the spots where the little crescent shapes from my nails had formed. I felt one of his fingers circling my entrance, gathering my arousal before plunging fully deep inside, my walls almost sucking it in. Another one soon followed and he started pumping them in and out while curling them upwards, massaging my sweet spot perfectly, still never missing the pace of the swirls of his tongue on my hardened bud.

It became too much too quickly. The dam holding back the river of my climax broke after not much longer and my orgasm washed over me violently, every single muscle in my body tensing up and my thighs pressing strongly against the side of my lover’s head while my hips rocked against his mouth, chasing my pleasure to its bitter end. One of my hands darted up to cover my mouth immediately, muffling the loud cries I let out as it happened, my one and only moment of clarity during the whole release.

And even then Kyle didn’t stop his ministrations, his hand covered with my juices as his fingers kept pushing inside, making way through my tightly clenched walls. After I came down from my haze, however, the overstimulation started to become rather painful - only when I managed to collect enough strength to tug at the back of his hair rather fiercely to pull him away from my cunt did he stop, and even then I swore I could see for a brief moment a hint of disappointment in his eyes.

Kyle positioned his body between my legs again and took his time to run one last stripe along my slit with his fingers, the ones he used inside me, before bringing them to his mouth and licking them clean, with his eyes closed. He did this every time, not wanting to waste even a single drop of me. I was his favorite whiskey and, when it came to that, he was a damn alcoholic.

This time it was me putting my hands on Kyle’s shoulders and bringing him down for a kiss, running the tip of my tongue across his lips lightly, tasting my love in him. When we parted, gasping for air, I leisurely ran my hands over his upper body, caressing every inch of him they could reach - his cheeks, then down his neck, around his collarbone, his chest, until my left hand stopped at his shoulder, on top of his biggest and most visible scar.

Kyle had plenty of scars, these things came with our line of work, but this one was different. Not caused by a bullet or a knife, but rather by fire itself - a dynamite explosion that caught us by surprise during a shootout in this very state we were currently in. That fire almost took my lover’s life, dragged both of us into months of suffering and stress, and even years after it was extinguished we still carried with us not only the trauma, but a physical reminder of everything it claimed.

The physical scar itself was a bit rough to the touch and full of small streaks and bumps all over. It spread all over his shoulder into the right side of his chest, his upper arm, and a bit over his back. Across the years, its color had faded from a gruesome brown to a slight reddish tint, but it still had a jarring contrast to Kyle’s pale skin. No part of it was delightful, if I’m being honest. Yet I’d kiss it every single night, caress it at every opportunity and massage it with expensive essential oils whenever those were available; because I’d take a whole life with that scar over even a single second of the alternative.

“You saved me, you know,” He murmured with a sigh.

“I know, because you say it all the time.” I chuckled. “But we ain’t gotta talk about that anymore, dear. You know I’d do it again.”

“Not that day. Well, yes that day, but also all the others before and after that.” He lowered his head closer to mine so that our noses and foreheads were touching, and his warm breath ghosted my lips, bringing the lustful haze back to my brain. At this point I didn’t know what I wanted to do more: Hear his voice forever as he whispered his praise and love towards me, or kiss him until I could feel all these words inside of my skin.

My partner took himself in his hands and started to slide the tip of his cock up and down between my folds, from my entrance to my clit, making my whole body twitch a little when he got to the still very sensitive bundle of nerves. “And you might just be about to save me again,” He continued, aligning himself with my entrance, “You’ll be the perfect wife and mother. My wife and the mother of my babies.”

Kyle pushed himself inside of me slowly, inch by inch, being extra careful as his big and thick cock stretched out my cunt. It didn’t hurt much, I was used to it after years of taking him regularly, but he still wanted to make sure I was comfortable every single time before continuing.

Once I gave him a smile and a small nod, he started to push in and out slowly, letting me feel every single twitch of his cock inside me and every one of those veins I knew so well pressed against my walls in their entirety. He quickly built up momentum, however, and soon the room was filled with the squelching sounds of my wetness being pounded against, his hips striking my body and the bedframe hitting the house’s wooden walls perfectly synchronizing with it. After a while like this, without warning, he picked up both my legs and brought them over each of his shoulders, pushing my knees back against my chest, my toes touching his hair as they curled in pleasure.

Kyle was hitting my cervix with every strong thrust now, sending sharp and slightly painful stings that jolted through my lower abdomen with every smash of his soft head against that barrier. And yet, every time I felt those, I just wanted more and more; Having Kyle deep inside me in this position always managed to cover all the right spots inside of me, I just wanted to hold him, keep him there. And I knew he was feeling just as good as I was - the sounds coming from his throat were getting louder and louder as he shut his lips tighter to prevent them from turning into full brown growls, his fingertips whiter than ever since his grip on my hips was so fierce I was sure by tomorrow I’d have a few bruises there.

“K-Kyle… Aaaaah… Give… Me…” I whimpered between moans, stretching my arms towards him, nails scratching against his skin as I tried to grab his hips, keep them glued to mine forever.

“Lord… You want me even more, do you?” He responded with shaky breaths, and I immediately felt it when he picked up even more speed - a move made even easier by the amount of slick built up in and around my pussy -, jackhammering into my cunt and making me see stars both from pain and pleasure.

At this point I should’ve known there was no point in even trying to hide our sinful sounds anymore, but I still felt like I needed to do it. I tried to pick up Kyle’s pillow from the side of my head and put it over my face to muffle my constant cries of satisfaction, but my partner immediately grabbed it from my hand and tossed it back in its place with a growl.

“No. Don’t hide it. I want to see it. The face you make… When you cum for me and I stuff you up to the brim.”

The scene he described burned into my brain almost immediately and I could think of nothing else. For him to fill me up, give me a baby, make us a family - it was all I wanted out of life now, and the mere thought of it was enough to have my muscles tensing and that familiar pressure on my lower abdomen to start building up again, threatening to snap. “Please, Kyle,” I whined, “Breed me. Give it all to me… I need it…”

“I know you do, darling...” He leaned closer to me to give me a kiss, the clash of our lips messy and awkward with our desperate need to touch each other and the fogginess in our brains, but we didn’t care. I just wanted to have him as close as possible. “I need it too… Cum for me, please. I want to feel you milking my dick to the last drop.”

He needed not ask further. For the second time that night I felt my whole body burst into electricity, my cunt spasming like crazy as I tried to give Kyle exactly what he asked of me, exactly what I felt like I was meant to do all along. My legs trashed all over near his shoulders and my back arched as I lost control of my body with the waves of pleasure that washed me over.

The tightness around his cock as my walls fluttered around him and my face contorting in absolute pleasure as I came were what finally did him in. Kyle threw his head back while he came undone inside me, grabbing my hips and pulling them towards him as he buried himself deep into my core, his manhood throbbing, painting my walls with his seed. The sensation was extremely new to me - I felt the warm spurts painting my walls, filling me up and leaving Kyle’s mark somewhere no other man could ever reach.

I wasn’t used to Kyle finishing inside of me. Considering the everlasting battle between our higher than average libidos and our fear of having children, the closest compromise for that was having him do it on my breasts, belly, mouth, face, even ass if he was feeling wild enough. On the rare occasions where he did cum inside, I couldn’t even enjoy it - my brain would immediately be flooded with stress and worry, shutting down any other sensation, and I’d spend the next month or so losing sleep waiting for my next period so I could finally be at peace again.

But here there was none of that. I could relax and ride out this high with him. I let him have his moment, heaving my exhaustion away quietly as I admired the red flush on his pale skin and the sheen of his sweat under the candlelight, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he panted like his lungs weren’t big enough for the amount of air he needed to live. When he finally opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was me, I felt wrapped up in his love all over again.

When his breathing started to steady, I figured he’d get himself off of me and take his place by my side on the bed. Instead, he just laid his whole body on top of mine, somehow being careful enough to not crush me under his weight as he collapsed.

“Kyle?” I gave him some quick taps to the shoulder with my fingers after a minute or two like this in silence, when I’d started to worry that he might just fall asleep. “C’mon, dear, you gotta scoot over if you wanna sleep.”

“Hmph… Sorry…” He groaned, with a sluggishness that made clear he was indeed just a few sheeps counted away from deep slumber. “Wanted to make sure to keep it all in. Don’t wanna waste…”

Even though he clearly didn’t want to, he slowly moved away from me and rolled to his side of the bed. When his dick withdrew from me, I suddenly felt a bit empty and wondered briefly if I couldn’t have tried to sleep like that or at least stay a little longer.

“Sorry, my dear,” I planted a kiss to the side of his head, “But you know, if you don’t get me pregnant tonight, we have plenty of time now.”

I sat back on the bed briefly to blow the candle out on the nightstand, plunging our room into almost complete darkness. As soon as I laid my head back on my pillow, Kyle brought his arm over my body and pulled me closer to him, nuzzling my hair.

“We have plenty of time now,” He whispered, with more energy in his voice this time.

And we definitely did.

Dividers by @cafekitsune

#south park #south park fanfiction #south park smut #south park x reader #south park x y/n #south park x you #south park fanfic #kyle broflovski #kyle broflovski x reader #kyle broflovski x y/n #kyle broflovski x you #gunslinger kyle #sp kyle #south park kyle #sp kyle broflovski #south park kyle broflovski #why the fuck do i tag so much #ao3 #x reader

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persephonewritessometimes · 2 years ago

Note

Aaron Hotchner x bau!reader

Where after months ( cuz shes new n young working there)they cant také anymore their attraction to each other.

Key sentences: Hotch: I’m old enough to be your father. R: Should I call you Daddy then?

Smut n fluff

Please

Author's Note: oooo thank you for this request anon!! thinking many thoughts, head very full

Summary: It's no secret that you have a thing for your boss - a man 25 years your senior. What happens when he reveals he has feelings for you too?

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x (AFAB) Reader

Word Count: 5108 (i got carried away hehe)

Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! UNDER 18? PLEASE KEEP SCROLLING! SMUT; DADDY KINK; SIR KINK; OVERSTIMULATION; MULTIPLE ORGASMS; UNPROTECTED P IN V (don't be like them y'all, stay safe); DOM!HOTCH, SUB!READER; READER IS HORNY; FINGERING; ORAL (F RECEIVING) reader gets distracted by Hotch's hands, pining, confession of feelings, reader blacks out from cumming really hard; Hotch calls reader "good girl, princess, baby"; Morgan is a cheeky bastard (as per usual)

This work is meant for readers aged 18 and over. You are responsible for your own media consumption.

“Y/N, you're staring, again," Morgan says with a chuckle and I quickly find somewhere else to look that isn't our section chief. Which I was definitely not having rated-R thoughts about.

"Shut up, Morgan," I mutter.

"Why don't you just tell him how you feel?" I turn and stare at him now, eyes wide in disbelief.

"Sure, why don't I just tell a much older man that every time I look at him, I feel weak in the knees and sweaty? That would really go over well." I say, sarcastically.

"We're getting tired of watching you eye-fuck him, Y/N." Emily sighs, jumping into the conversation.

"It's getting kind of pathetic at this point," Morgan adds and I smack him on the shoulder.

"You guys are being mean. Let me pine in peace."

"Y/N, none of us are at peace when you start acting like a dog in heat every time Hotch walks in the room. It's genuinely hard to watch." Morgan shoots back, grinning at me. I feel my cheeks grow hot at his brazen comment. "Just put us out of our misery and get laid for once, damn." I feel my cheeks growing even hotter.

"He - he doesn't like me like that." I'm tripping over my words, embarrassed that everyone can see what's clearly written by my body language when Hotch is around.

"Y/N, sweetie, you're smart, but sometimes you're an idiot," Emily says kindly. "He likes you."

"Trust us, we know," Morgan adds.

"How?" I say and cross my arms over my chest.

"Really? Okay. Whenever he's giving a briefing and you're standing next to him, his body gravitates towards yours, you're the first person he looks for in every room, Y/N, two weeks ago on that case in Charleston he almost throttled the officer that merely tried to flirt with you."

"Wait, that officer was flirting with me?" I've only been here a few months, so I haven't learned how to read people as well as him yet.

"Oh my god, she actually is an idiot." Morgan groans. "Yes! He always got you coffee refills without asking, offered you the first pick of the donuts, and gave you, and only you, a very thorough tour of the precinct. He was trying to impress you." He looks at me closely. "How the fuck did you get this job?" I shrug.

"Impeccable academic record?" I suggest timidly, and he snorts.

"Just pay attention to Hotch. More than you are already. You'll see."

"He's old enough to be my dad," I say.

"Why do I have the feeling that only fuels your fantasies?" Morgan mutters. "I'm done with this conversation. Either you tell him, Y/N, or I will."

"MORGAN!" He just throws his hands up in the air giving me an exasperated look. "Em? A little back up here?"

"As much as I hate to agree with Morgan, he has a point. It’s kind of hard to focus on work when we all know what’s going on except for you two. I mean this in the nicest way possible, but just say something, for the sake of everyone who has to be in a room with you guys. I could cut the tension between you two like a knife.” She gives me a small smile.

“I- I’m just nervous. What if you guys are wrong?” She places her hand over mine.

“We’re not wrong, Y/N. We even asked Reid to weigh in and he agrees with us. Just say something.” I frown and head back to my desk, needing to be alone with my thoughts for a while. I’m deep in a stack of paperwork when Hotch calls the team into a meeting. I sigh, set my pen aside, and make my way into the boardroom. I’m on high alert, due to Morgan’s comment, and as I step into the room, I glance at Hotch to find him already looking at me. He looks away quickly and I watch as the tips of his ears turn pink. Oh my god, they were right.

I’m hyper-aware of him the whole meeting, so much so that I barely heard a word he was saying.

“Y/N? Are you paying attention?” Hotch asks, looking at me.

“Uh, yes, sir.” I blurt out in a panic. I wasn’t expecting him to directly address me.

“YES SIR?” Morgan hollers. “That’s a new one.” Even Em is hiding a smile behind her hand. Hotch glares at him.

“Don’t tease her, Morgan. Y/N, please pay attention.”

“I will, sorry Hotch.” He just nods and goes back to what he was saying. I tried to pay attention I really did but I found myself watching his hands as he talked. He gestures at the screen, then to something in the paper he had given us, then puts his hand on his hip. His fingers are so thick I wonder if two would even fit inside of me. I’m thinking about him fingering me on his desk, pussy splayed and dripping for him, and I shift in my seat, feeling the wetness in my panties. Dammit, Y/N, don’t get carried away.

“Y/N, seriously,” Hotch sighs a few minutes later and I’m dragged from my dirty daydream. “I need you to pay attention or leave. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.”

“I’ve got an idea,” Morgan whispers with a grin. I glare at him.

“I’m trying to pay attention, I swear.”

“Are you sick? You look a bit warm, why don’t you step out for a few minutes.” I just nod, too embarrassed to look him in the eyes. “And I want to see you in my office when we’re done with this meeting.” I nod again and feel my stomach drop to my ass in nervousness. I quickly walk out of the room and am pacing when the door opens up and Morgan walks out, a shit-eating grin on his face.

“What the hell were you thinking about in there?” He whispers, then pauses, “Actually, I’m not sure I want to know.”

“Just leave me alone, Morgan. I’m embarrassed enough already.” I say quietly.

“Oh, baby girl, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to tease you too much. You’re just an easy target. If it helps any, Hotch was downright flushed after you left. He stumbled over his words. Twice. I’ve never seen him that flustered. It’s like he knew what you were thinking about.” He nudges me with his shoulder. “Don’t sweat it, okay?”

“You’re not the one who has to face him in his office,” I grumble.

“Well, just make sure you guys close the blinds.”

“MORGAN! Shut up!” He’s laughing as he walks away. JJ and Em shoot me sympathetic smiles as they walk by and Reid pats me on the shoulder. Hotch doesn’t say a word as he walks out of the boardroom, and I diligently follow him to his office.

“Take a seat.” He says, gesturing at the chair and my eyes follow his hand again. Y/N! Stop! That’s what got you in trouble in the first place! I quickly take a seat, clasping my hands in my lap. “Now do you want to tell me why you were so distracted today?” He asks, looking at me. I feel the heat creep up my chest and onto my cheeks.

“I-um-no. No, I don’t.” He raises an eyebrow at that.

“Really? Because Morgan seems to have an idea. Maybe I should go ask him what he thinks.”

“No!” I blurt out. “Sorry. It’s just…embarrassing.” He just looks at me and I sigh before whispering, “Your hands. I was distracted by your hands.”

“My…hands?” He says slowly.

“Yes, sir, I mean Hotch, sorry. I know it’s not appropriate and I apologize.”

“What is it about my hands?” He asks, his voice low and in a tone that makes my heartbeat travel down to my pussy. I shift in my seat, a movement that most likely does not go unnoticed by him. “Y/N. Look at me.” I take a shaky breath and look up at him, all rational thoughts leaving my head when I see that his cheeks are pink, and his pupils are so blown I can barely see the brown. “What is it. About my hands.” He enunciates every word.

“They’re big,” I whisper.

“And what does that make you think about?”

“Please don’t make me say it.”

“No, no I want to hear you say it.”

In the smallest voice possible I say, “I was wondering if your fingers would even fit in me.” I hear him take in a sharp breath. “What it would feel like to be spread out on your desk with - with your fingers inside of me.”

“Careful, Y/N, you’re walking a thin line.” He murmurs.

“Haven’t I crossed it already, sir?”

“I’m old enough to be your father.” He says, words clipped. I get a sudden burst of confidence and stare him down.

“Should I call you Daddy, then?” I ask sweetly. I watch as he tightens his jaw.

“Watch your mouth, little girl. You don’t want to see how mean Daddy can get.”

“And what if I want to find out, Daddy?” I watch as his nostrils flare and he takes a deep breath.

“That’s enough, Y/N.” He spits out and I still, and fear that I’m about to lose my job to ill-timed arousal. My breath hitches as he leans back in his chair, eyes carefully watching me. “What am I gonna do with you?”

“Whatever you’d like to, sir,” I say simply and I watch his jaw tick again.

“Listen to me very carefully. We are going to go downstairs, you are going to gather your things, and you are not going to say a single word. I’m going to tell everyone that you’re not feeling well enough to drive, so I’m taking you home.” I swallow hard, not believing that this is actually happening right now. “Do you understand?” I nod quickly. “I need to hear you say you understand. Or else this stops now, and we don’t speak of it again.”

“I understand completely, sir.”

“Good girl.” He says in a low voice and a whimper escapes me before I can shove it down. He stiffens. “Do you like that? Hearing that you’re a good girl?” My pussy clenches around nothing, begging to be filled.

“Yes, Daddy.” He hums, getting up quickly and my mouth goes dry when I see the tented fabric of his pants. He shrugs off his suit jacket and slings it over his forearm and in front of his body, effectively hiding his raging boner. He walks over to me, and I hastily get up from the chair, and he grabs my arm, gripping it just hard enough to keep me grounded and lucid despite the lust-filled thoughts in my head. He yanks open his office door and we make our way down the stairs. I keep my head down as we approach my desk, the bullpen so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

“Y/N isn’t feeling well. I’m driving her home.” Hotch says, letting go of my arm so I can grab my jacket and purse. I glance at him, nodding that I have everything, and he grabs my arm again, and we hastily walk towards the elevator.

“GO EASY ON HER, HOTCH!” Morgan shouts, and I hear Em laugh.

“Shut up, Morgan.” Hotch growls over his shoulder, and I glance back at Morgan, who mouths ‘Good luck’ at me. “Don’t look at him. The only person you should be looking at is me, princess.” We get in the elevator, and he pushes the button so hard I think that he’s going to break the damn thing.

“Jesus, what’s got you so riled up?” I say sweetly, not caring that I’d probably pay for that question later. I just want to see him snap, lose that carefully cultivated control and unleash himself on me. He turns on me in a second, caging my body between the wall of the elevator and the hard planes of his body. He grabs my chin, tilting my face up to look at him.

“Watch yourself. I’d hate for you to get into something you can’t handle.”

“I can take whatever you throw at me, sir.” He laughs.

“Yeah, right, princess. Keep talking a big game – we’ll see how far that gets you.”

“Well, it got me here, didn’t it?”

“Right where you wanted, I presume?” He asks, tilting his head and there’s nothing friendly in his eyes. I just nod, sucking in a breath when he pushes his body closer to mine and his hard-on is pressing into my thigh. “Before this goes further: green for go, yellow for slow down, red for hard stop, no questions asked. Do you understand?” I nod, and he raises his eyebrows.

“I understand!” I blurt out.

“Good.” He suddenly dips his head down, nose bumping into mine as we share the same breaths for a few seconds. “I’m going to ruin you.” He whispers onto my lips, not quite kissing me.

“Please. Ruin me, Daddy,” I whisper and he’s kissing me as soon as the last word is out of my mouth. It’s overwhelming, the way he kisses, stealing all the air from my lungs in a millisecond. I gasp when the hand from my chin drops to my chest, reaching into my dress shirt and under my tank top to tweak my right nipple. He takes that opportunity to slip his tongue into my mouth, tasting me. The elevator dings and his hand disappears from my shirt and his lips retreat. I whine at the sudden loss of contact, as we had just gone from 100 miles an hour to 0 miles an hour.

“I know, princess, I’m sorry. You don’t want Daddy to get caught, do you?” I shake my head vigorously and he chuckles, escorting me to his car, and opens the passenger door for me, ever the gentleman. He gets in and starts the car as I buckle my seatbelt. He backs out of the parking spot, placing one hand on the back of my headrest and I suck in a sharp breath. He glances at me. “Really? You’re turned on by my driving?”

“I can’t help it. I’m sorry.” I breathe out, not daring to look at him. My cheeks are warm, and I feel frazzled. I jump when his hand comes to rest on my thigh, dangerously close to where I want him. I shift my hips, trying to get him closer to where I need him. He smacks my thigh abruptly.

“Don’t do that. You can wait.” He says gruffly.

“I can’t. I can’t wait.” I gasp out. “Please. Please touch me. I need you. Please, sir, I’ll do anything.”

“I’ll oblige you, but only because you begged so prettily. I like it when you sound desperate. One rule though: no cumming without my permission.” His hand slips under my skirt and I thank god that this was one of the rare days I decided to wear one. His fingers ghost over my cunt, the lightest touch and my breathing is already starting to labor. When his fingers press my clit from outside my panties my hips buck into the air. “Someone’s responsive.” He says, more to himself than me. His fingers trail lower, and he groans when he feels the wet spot. “Already this wet for me, princess?”

“Only for you, Daddy.” I whimper when he pushes my panties to the side, hand now free to touch as he pleases. His fingers come up to tease my clit again before one deftly slips inside of me. I let out a choked sound, tight around him. Just one finger feels thick, and when he slips in another finger I keen, tightening again.

“Jesus, you’re tight.” He curls his fingers and hits that spot inside of me that I struggle to hit by myself. I gasp, hand closing around his wrist, and I don’t know if I’m trying to stop him or egg him on. He continues to work his fingers in me as he drives and I’m not sure how he’s managing to stay on the road. I know I should reciprocate but the feeling of his fingers plunging in and out of me has made every thought I’ve ever had flee my brain. After a few minutes, my thighs start to shake and I’m panting, so close to a mind-blowing orgasm that I forget he told me I can’t cum without his permission. His fingers slip out of me seconds before I hit my peak.

“NO!” I shout, shaking in the passenger seat, sitting in a small puddle of my own arousal. I hope it stains his impeccable leather seats.

“Only good girls get to cum, and you haven’t been a good girl today, baby,” He says, “Open.” I open my mouth and he slips the fingers he just had inside of me into my awaiting mouth. I suck his fingers off earnestly, just like I would to his cock if he gave me the chance. He pulls his fingers out with a pop and I realize he’s parked the car in his garage. Is this really happening? I think to myself. “Color?” He asks me, turning my face so I can look into his eyes. I could get lost in his eyes.

“Green,” I say quickly.

“Good girl,” He whispers and meets my mouth in a messy kiss full of tongue, need, and teeth.

I don’t know how we made it inside, but as soon as I cross through the doorway, Hotch throws me over his shoulder, and I shriek. He carries me to the bedroom, dropping me on the bed. I’m paralyzed as I watch him rip his tie off, dress shirt following soon after. He’s beautiful, and I want to run my hands all over him and feel every scar. My eyes are tracing his chest and ever the profiler, he notices.

“You can touch. It’s okay.” He walks over to me, planting himself between my legs. I timidly touch his stomach, trailing my hands up his abdomen, running my fingers along his scars in quiet admiration. He suddenly takes my hand, kissing it, a break in the dominant façade. I give him a soft smile, one that has always been reserved for him, and his breath hitches in his chest. His hands cup my face, looking into my eyes, and I’ve never felt safer than I have at this moment. I close my eyes, leaning into his touch, my hands resting on his wrists. It feels like we’re the only people in the world, two souls destined to collide. His next kiss is gentle as if he doesn’t want to ruin the moment, but he tosses his resolve out the window when I bite his bottom lip. He growls, pushing me onto my back and stepping out of his pants and boxers. I push myself up on my elbows to watch him and gasp when he’s revealed to me completely. He’s big. Bigger than I’ve had before. I knew it would be big because of his damn hands. “You’re far too dressed for my liking.” He mutters, and the next moment he actually rips my shirt off of me, buttons flying everywhere.

“HOTCH!” He stops, looking at me.

“Try again, sweetheart.”

“Sorry. Daddy.”

“Much better. And Daddy will buy you a new one, okay?” I nod, suddenly unable to think as he slides off my tank top and unclasps my bra. My nipples are aching to be touched and as if he can read my mind, his head dips down to take my left nipple in his mouth. I suck in a breath, my hand coming to rest on the back of his head. His tongue laves over my nipple, and I swear I see God for a moment. He moves to the other side and my cunt is begging for attention. He slides my skirt and panties off without once leaving my chest. And when I’m naked before him, he kisses his way up my throat, leaving hickeys that will definitely be hard to hide.

“Daddy, people will see.”

“And? They should know whom you belong to.” He says plainly, he leans back, admiring my form and my hips jump up on their own accord, grazing his weeping tip in the process.

“Fuck, princess, don’t do that.”

“Please, please, please, Daddy, I need you so bad.”

“Daddy has to make sure you’re ready for him. I don’t know if my fat cock will fit in your tight little pussy.” I whimper at his words, more turned on than I’ve ever been in my entire life. He slides down my body, pressing kisses into my skin as he goes until he gets on his knees, dragging me towards the edge of the bed. He slings both of my legs over his shoulder, pressing a chaste kiss into my thigh. “Your pussy is dripping for me, princess. Can I taste it?”

“Please,” I manage to whisper, and I watch as his head dips down and he licks up my pussy. He groans against my clit when he tastes me, and I shout in surprise at the added stimulation. He chuckles against me and goes to work, tongue thrusting shallowly in me before coming up to tease my clit. He’s getting me closer to the edge and when I feel two of his fingers slide into me easily, I sigh contentedly. He finds the spongy spot inside of me with ease, hitting it every time he thrusts his fingers into me. I’m hurtling towards my peak when I gasp out, “Daddy, please, I’m close, can I cum? Please? I’ll be a good girl, I promise. Your good girl.” His eyes flick up and he watches me, never stopping, and watches as my abdomen tenses and I start to clench around his fingers, panting. He pulls his mouth away from me just long enough to whisper,

“You can let go, princess.” And resumes his torturous pace on me. My hand shoots down to grip his hair and a few seconds later my orgasm rips through me. I shout loudly, hips moving with abandon against his face, and he doesn’t let up, continuing to lick and finger me through it until I’m twitching with overstimulation.

“Daddy, please, too much.”

“You wanted to cum, princess, so you’re going to cum until I’m done.” He growls and goes back to eating me out. I had no time to come down from my first orgasm and my body is already sprinting full speed ahead toward my second. My thighs clench around his face but it doesn’t stop him. He stills his fingers inside me and simply presses them into my G-spot, never letting up, just putting constant pressure on it.

I’m babbling at this point, nothing coherent coming from my lips except for ‘daddy’ and ‘please’. My orgasm blindsides me and I clench hard around his fingers and scream, not caring if anyone can hear me. My vision goes spotty as I continue to cum until he finally slips his fingers out and I feel like I can breathe again. I’m gasping for air as his touch trails along my hips.

“Still with me, pretty girl?” I nod still gasping. “Color?”

“Green, green, green.” I pant out quickly and he chuckles. He gives me a few more seconds to come down, tracing gentle patterns into my sides and he kisses me once my breathing slows. I pull away to bite my way down his neck, leaving my own marks on him. “Daddy, need you inside me, please.”

“Are you sure you’re ready for me, princess?”

“Yes! Yes! So ready! Please just fuck me!”

“Okay, let me grab a condom.”

“No!” I shout, grabbing his shoulders. “I’m clean. Please, I want to feel you. Just you.”

“You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?” He says, kissing the tip of my nose. I watch as he pumps himself a few times and lines up with my entrance. He pushes in, just barely, and stays there until I’m begging him to push the rest of the way in.

“Please, Daddy, I want to feel full. I feel so empty.” He sheathes himself in me in one quick motion and I gasp. “Thank you, Daddy,” I whisper onto his lips.

“Fucking hell, Y/N, you’re so goddamn tight.” He’s still above me, and I can see his shoulders shaking in restraint. “You feel like heaven.”

“Please move, please. Let go, I can take it.” I whisper, peering into his eyes and he pulls out a little bit to thrust shallowly. He swallows my moan with his lips, kissing me with the fervor of a man starved. He starts off at a slow pace and despite being sensitive from my previous two orgasms, I need more. I dig my nails into his shoulder. “Please, for the love of God, fuck me. Hard. Please. I can take it. All of it.” He looks at me hard, searching for any hesitation, but his dick is literally inside of me, so there’s no hesitation on my part. I nod up at him and he leans down to kiss me as he starts to set a brutal pace. His hips are slamming against mine and when I shift my hips up to meet his thrusts he hits my G-spot with every thrust. “SHIT!” I shout, the words quickly turning into a loud moan as his thumb comes down to flick at my clit. I’m shaking with arousal, and I can feel his balls slap against my ass with how hard he’s fucking me.

“Come on, pretty girl, I know you’ve got one more in you. Give it to Daddy. I want to feel you cum around my cock.” There are no thoughts in my head anymore, everything in me has zeroed in on the feeling of him literally fucking me into the mattress. “You look so pretty fucked out like this, bet you can’t think of anything but my cock inside of you, huh?” I nod and he laughs, kissing me hard. He leans back just enough to change the angle by shifting my calf onto his shoulder. He thrusts, hard, and I whimper. “You make such pretty sounds when I’m fucking you.” He picks up the pace again, moving his thumb on my clit in tight circles. I let out a broken moan as he hits just the right spot inside of me, and he takes note of it, hitting the same spot repeatedly, thumb keeping its pace on my clit. It’s overwhelming and I know that this orgasm is going to ruin other men for me. No one can do it like him. “Y/N,” his voice is low, “Look at me, baby, I want to watch you fall apart.” I drag my eyes open and look at him with dazed eyes. One particularly hard thrust and a drag of his thumb over my clit and I’m cumming violently, thrashing against him and gripping the bed sheets, my body spasming and I feel him fuck me through it and spill inside of me with a shouted curse before I black out.

I come to and can feel a warm washcloth being dragged between my legs gingerly. I hiss at the contact.

“Oh, thank god, are you okay?” I nod, throat raspy from screaming. “Can I get you anything?” I shake my head no, and the warm washcloth returns, I jump at the sensation. “I know, I have to clean you up though, okay?” He finishes in the next couple of moments and throws the washcloth into the hamper.

“How long was I out?” I say softly.

“Five minutes? Maybe six.” I nod.

“Sorry.”

“Sorry? Y/N, that was the biggest ego boost I’ve had in years.” He chuckles and I let out a weak laugh.

“Help me up?” I whisper, holding my hands out toward him. He obliges, gently grabbing my hands and pulling me into a sitting position. My vision starts to go spotty again. “Oh, Jesus,” I say, starting to slump forwards. His arms wrap around me quickly, holding me against his chest until my vision starts to return to normal. His thumbs are rubbing my back and I wish I could stay in this moment forever. “I’m okay, I think,” I whisper after a minute and try to pull away but he only lets me get a few inches away, eyes worriedly searching my face. “Hotch, I’m fine. I swear. Now let me go so I can go pee.” He lets go of me slowly and when I stand up to walk toward the bathroom, my legs buckle underneath me. “Oh, come on!” I exclaim, but Hotch is right there to catch me. He scoops me up despite my protests and carries me bridal style to the bathroom, setting me down on the toilet. “Thank you,” I whisper, suddenly embarrassed.

“No, don’t do that. I can see you trying to hide, getting embarrassed.”

“Am I that obvious?”

“Yeah, when your guard is down, you’re easy to read.”

“So, uh, do we just pretend this never happened? Go back to the way things were. I assume that’s what you want?” I bury my face in my hands, unable to look at him.

“Go back to the way things were? Y/N, baby, no. I can’t go back. This was not a one-time thing. I’m yours if you’ll have me.” I peek at him from between my fingers.

“Wait, you’re being serious right now?”

“Dead serious.” He gets on his knees in front of me. “I’ve wanted you from the first moment you walked into my office. I just didn’t think you’d reciprocate, until Morgan made a comment two months ago about your body language, and that’s when I had the hunch you felt the same way.”

“So, you’ve known I’ve been pining over you for months and didn’t think to say anything?” My pitch gets higher as the sentence goes on.

“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“Yes, I’m clearly uncomfortable with you as I’m sitting in front of you, naked,” I say drily and he laughs again.

“Yeah, I know, I’m an idiot.”

“Yes, you are,” I say, smiling, before adding, “But you’re my idiot.” His eyes brighten at that.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. As you said, I’m yours if you’ll have me.”

“Good. Because I’m never letting go of you.” I feel my cheeks grow warm.

“Good, because I don’t want you to.”

#hotch x y/n #hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #hotch #hotch x reader #criminal minds #aaron hotchner #hotch smut

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hongmingoo · 1 year ago

Text

Still You

Pairing: Jeon Wonwoo x f!Reader

Warnings: Brother's best friend, Best friend's sister, Slight underage relationship, Slight teacher-student relationship, Domestic Abuse (not explicit), Exes to lovers, Angst, Fluff, Forbidden love tragedy

Word Count: 11k+

Inspired from: Still You - Seungkwan

Summary: Tragic love story between two lovers who met at the wrong time, having to go through trials after trials just to end up finding each other again.

Jeon Wonwoo has never believed in love at first sight. He always thought that it takes time for people to get to know each other and eventually fall in love. But with you, it's so different.

You were his best friends' sister. A young girl compared to the circle he is used to. You were away, living with your grandmother in Jeju while your brother lived with your mom in Seoul. Six years younger than Jisoo is, you are instantly adored by his peers.

So, Wonwoo thought it's only normal for him to adore you too. You were a nice kid, polite and kind, also very understanding– very unfitting of your young age. You didn't complain when you're left alone at home after school because your mom works until late and your brother is busy with his school and part time job.

You'd do the chores at home on your own, cook simple dinner to eat, do your homeworks and go to bed early for school days. Sometimes, your classmate, Seungkwan would bring you food and side dishes that his mom made since he lived just next door. And because his younger brother Seokmin is in the same class as you too, he often sees you when he comes to pick Seokmin up from your house after his part time job.

"Poor Y/nie" Seokmin would say one day when they both walk home from your house.

"Why?" Wonwoo questioned.

"Because she's always left alone. Her mom's busy working, same as Jisoo-hyung. But when I asked her if she's lonely, she'd say she's okay with it because they're working hard to make extra cash now that she's staying with them. She's allowed to say she's lonely right, hyung?" Seokmin sighed, his tiny shoulders slumped from the heavy exhale.

Seokmin is caring, more than a 10-year-old should be, but that made Wonwoo proud nonetheless.

"Should we prepare a welcoming party for Y/nie? It's been 2 weeks since she came, right? We haven't had the time to welcome her properly. So, go tell Seungkwan and Soonyoung tomorrow that we'll throw a party for Y/nie at our home on Saturday" Wonwoo suggested, bending down to match his brother's eye level.

Seokmin's face lit up, nodding enthusiastically at the idea.

Still, Wonwoo didn't expect you'd be so happy when they threw the small party for you that Saturday. Didn't expect you'd cry and hugged him while saying your thanks. You'd hugged Seokmin, Seungkwan, and Soonyoung too, promising that you'd be best friends forever.

Jisoo and his mom had come at 8pm to pick you up and thanked his family for welcoming you so warmly which made his mom pat his back in pride. He'd kneel down in front of you to wipe your tears, told you to smile because you looked so pretty smiling.

Wonwoo didn't expect to fall for you, the way he did because he shouldn't. You are his best friend's sister, the one he looks up to as his own brother. And most importantly, you're way too young for him, plus you're also his brother's best friend. By the time he's 17, he realized that his first love is someone he can't get, someone he isn't supposed to love, someone he has to give up entirely on.

At 17, Jeon Wonwoo realized he had fallen in love with the 12-year-old you.

But, in his defense, you're way too mature for a 12-year-old. You're as attentive and caring as your brother Jisoo. You'd give him your handmade cards on his birthday, accompany him and Seokmin for dog walking, never attempt to drag him to a pool or a lake because you knew he had a fear of drowning.

There was one time where you'd knit a scarf for him because he got cold so easily. Tell him you learnt how to knit at school. You said you wanted to make him some mittens but it's too hard so you ended up making him the dark blue colored scarf instead. Then, you also promised that you'd make him a beanie with cat ears because he likes cats once you've practiced enough.

And Jeon Wonwoo realized he is fucked up because he can't possibly love someone so young. The guilt is eating him alive, he felt like he was betraying the trust Jisoo had on him. So, he did the only thing he knew at the moment. He ran away.

You were told by Seokmin that his brother had left to live with his grandparents in Changwon. So he could focus on his studies since he's a high school senior now.

"So, today our class will be taken over by the new student teacher. He's here for his internship for 6 months. So please be nice to him" your homeroom teacher, Mr. Yoon reminded his students. He welcomed the new teacher, that you didn't even notice his presence in the class, not that you cared.

You were just doodling when Soonyoung slapped your arm hard, to get your attention.

"Ow! What is wrong with you?!" You whisper-yelled, still having the decency to be quiet in class. You gave him a nasty glare but he paid you no mind, eyes still glued on the figure at the front of the class.

"Isn't he Seokmin's brother? The new teacher" he whispered, eyes not leaving the front.

"Hello, my name is Jeon Wonwoo. I'll be teaching you Math for this semester. Nice to meet all of you," the deep voice introduced himself with a smile. Your eyes widen, because you remember that voice, that face and most importantly, that smile.

"Hyung! It's me, Soon–" Soonyoung was about to expose himself, raising his hand in the air, but you quickly pulled him down together with you to hide your face on your table.

"Why are we hiding?!" He whispered, confused by your actions.

"I don't know?!" You replied, shaking your head.

"What?! Are you on your period or something? You're acting weird. Anyways, we're gonna have to introduce ourselves, so act proper" your friend scolded. You were stunned because he played Uno reverse on you since usually it's the other way around for you.

"My name is Kwon Soonyoung. My birthday is June 15 and I like tigers! I think you already knew me since we met when I was 10. I am Seokmin's best friend too" Soonyoung introduced himself happily, his hands flying everywhere. Wonwoo's eyes lit up in recognition upon seeing him, his smile widened.

"Oh, Soonyoung. You've grown. Nice to see you again. I look forward to seeing you around more" he chuckled at the boy's excited giggle. Soonyoung turned around to his side, a girl with long dark hair was sitting next to him, face hidden behind a book.

"Come on, your turn" Soonyoung chirped. You wished he could just shut up for one second. You groan inwardly as you stand up, feeling eyes on you already. You reluctantly meet Wonwoo's gaze but it accidentally turned into a glare from how hard you clenched your jaw.

"My name is Hong Y/n. I was born in winter, my hobby is reading" you mumbled your introduction, barely audible but Wonwoo heard it so clearly. It's you, the girl he missed the most. The girl who's still so pretty donning her summer uniform, even though it's already September, despite giving him a harsh glare with a pair of hazel orbs. Wonwoo's eyes widened slightly and his breath hitched but he masked it with a polite smile, the kind that teachers usually have.

"Did you miss your breakfast this morning, Hong Y/n? You seemed grumpy," he teased, for the sake of shaking off the heavy air hung in the classroom. The whole class erupted in laughter and you took a seat after blowing air to your bangs in annoyance.

"How did you know that, teacher? Y/n's only grumpy when she's hungry~" Youngji teased, earning a glare from you too.

"She reminds me of my cat at home. Grumpy when hungry, hehe" Wonwoo chuckled, making the whole class laugh again, except you of course.

"Anyways, I hope we get along just fine this semester. Pleased to meet all of you"

...

"Did you not have any decency to tell us your brother is back and he'll be teaching our class?" You scoffed, sitting at the table at the park for lunch.

"He told me to keep it a secret. He wanted to surprise you guys," Seokmin grinned, opening his lunch box carefully and picking up his chopsticks to start eating.

"I thought I was dreaming when I saw him walk into our class," Soonyoung said, sipping on his strawberry milk.

"So, he's back to your home?" Seungkwan questioned, munching on his sausage.

"No. He rented a house in town. He visited last weekend. And told me to keep it a secret. And here he is today" Seokmin laughed at your incredulous face.

"Are you still mad at him? It's been 5 years. Forgive him already. I thought you moved on from him?" Seungkwan asked.

"I didn't like him"

"Okay? So why are you mad?"

"He left without saying anything to me"

"You weren't anyone to him, Y/n. Why would he tell you? Haven't you thought of it like that?" Seungkwan questioned and you went silent, glaring at him. Soonyoung choked on his sandwich while Seokmin eyed the two of you warily.

"You didn't have to be so blunt about it," Soonyoung coughs, reaching for his strawberry milk. But Seungkwan was right, you were just a friend to his brother, why would he even tell you anything at all? But part of you is still mad at him, because you thought you were special, maybe you mean something to him. But no, you need a reality check. There's no way someone as perfect as Wonwoo would fall for a kid like you.

"Can I join you guys? We haven't had the chance to catch up," a familiar voice rang from behind you, making you frozen on the spot.

"Hyung! Have a seat, let's eat together," Soonyoung cheered and Wonwoo thanked him with a smile. He took a seat on the empty spot next to you, setting his tumbler and lunch box down before he began eating. You still froze, unable to look his way at all.

"You have to call me Teacher at school though. Please remember that," he scolded lightly, nose scrunching up in a cute smile. He still looked so cute and dainty, despite his body having bulked up from the last time they saw him. It's such a contradiction, but he looked hot anyways so who cares.

"Right, sorry. It's confusing," Soonyoung complained.

"When did you come back to Seoul?" Seungkwan asked, looking up at the older male eating his lunch cutely. Tiny bites of everything but somehow still has his mouth full and cheeks puffing up.

"2 weeks ago. I had to settle down in my new home and get ready for school. So yeah, haven't had the time to reach out"

"I see, I thought you just moved back in with your family, that way we could hang out again" Soonyoung whined.

"We can, once I've settled down properly sometime later. Though I wonder, would you younglings even want to hang out with an oldie like me?" The teacher teased.

"Ayy, come on. You looked the same, since 5 years ago. Even Seokmin looks older than you" Seungkwan scoffed before getting into a debate with Seokmin. Wonwoo looks over to you, who has been eating your food silently, not engaging in any of their noisy banter.

"I heard Jisoo is teaching at the private school out of town?" He asked, gently seeking your attention. You just nodded, not sparing him any glances and he had to hold back a pout at your lack of interest in him.

It used to be so different, you would have given him your full attention before he even opened his mouth. But now, you wouldn't even spare him a glance.

"I'm heading back to class. I forgot to do the notes Ms. Jung told us last week. See you in class, Soonie" you retorted, standing up from your chair to leave.

"Didn't you finish the notes right after? You even let me copy it yesterday–" Soonyoung cuts himself off immediately upon seeing you throw him yet another dirty glare, stomping away immediately.

"Sorry, she's on her period. Mood swings" the boy chuckled, scratching at his nape sheepishly.

Wonwoo's eyes trailed your leaving form. Your shiny hair, the tight shirt that clung to your form, your skirt dancing in the slight breeze, your long legs, cute socks peeking from your shoes. 5 years of being away trying to move on has gone down the drain, at the mere sight of you, the beautiful you who is mad at him, the pretty you who owns his heart.

He can no longer deny it. He loves you. He's madly in love with you.

"Is it your mission to follow me around now?" You questioned, irritation obvious on your face as you eyed Wonwoo suspiciously. You were working part time at the local bookstore, the one the elderly couple owns. It was your favorite spot, the place has become your mini library since there's rarely any customers anyways. Wonwoo knew this place, he was the one who brought you here in the first place. So, it's not weird to see him hanging around you because to them, you guys have always been close since you were kids. And today, they left the store for you to handle in favor of going to visit their grandchildren who had just given birth.

"Because you're mad at me and you're avoiding me. I need to know why" he explained, eyes soft as he looked up at you from his sitting position on the bench in the back corner of the store.

"I'm working. You could have meet me sometime later"

"You won't meet me even if I try. So I had to come here"

He was right, you have been avoiding him except in class because there was no way to run and you needed the knowledge because you suck at Math. Other than that, you would have bolted somewhere else if you even saw just a tiny tuft of his fluffy hair poking somewhere.

"Tell me why you're mad?" He persuaded, right hand reaching out to curl around your smaller one.

"I don't know, ask yourself. You were the one who left without any notice. You could have told me and I would have waited for you. But then you decided to come back here, unnoticed. What am I supposed to do?" You grumbled, pulling your hand back, unable to stop your rambling as you focus your gaze on the books you need to stack.

Wonwoo stood up from the bench, towering over you, and you made yourself smaller, fitting your body in the corner, avoiding his stare.

"Have you ever thought that maybe because I'm a coward? That I might have fallen for you but I shouldn't do that because you're my brother's best friend and my best friend's sister" he says, leaning closer to you.

"So what if I am your brother's best friend? So what if I am your best friend's sister? Is there some kind of rule that says that people like that shouldn't date each other?" You countered, glaring up at him. Wonwoo was quite taken aback from what you said, so you continued.

"Plus, I'm not that naive enough to think that you'd like a kid like me. Now move, I have tons of books to stack by today" you pushed him aside to grab the books on the cart and began arranging them neatly on the shelf.

"What if I say you're my student? Someone I shouldn't have developed any feelings on. Someone I should have clear boundaries with?" He questioned.

"Then, why are you here Mr. Jeon? If you know you should have clear boundaries with me, you should have just ignored me instead of following me around like this," you challenged, turning around to look into his eyes again. It shocked Wonwoo to the core to see you so upfront like this. He forgot what he wanted to say when his eyes met the blaze in your orbs.

"If you need to know, you are a person to me first before you're a teacher to me. The person that I liked when I was 12. Now please go. I'm working, you're disturbing me" you sighed, pushing him backwards to stumble towards the door. Wonwoo was stunned, he didn't expect that you'd just confessed to him. That was his answer, you were mad because you liked him but he left you behind without any news.

"It's okay to be naive sometimes, Y/n-ah" he breathes, large hands grasping your wrist gently to stop you from pushing him away. You glared up at him again, a frown decorating your pretty face. You didn't say anything, but it's enough to know you're questioning his motives.

"It's okay to be naive, to think that I liked you. No, actually… I love you. I'm sorry for being a coward and running away," he confesses. Your frown deepens and it was obvious to him that you're not buying what he says.

"Stop playing with me, Mr Jeon. Is this some kind of hidden camera you planned with the guys?" You asked, looking around the store warily. He smiled at you, hands traveling up to cup your face before planting a soft kiss on your forehead.

"I'm not playing with you. I genuinely love you. My heart is about to burst out of my ribcage from nervousness, you know. You can listen and be the judge," he chuckled, pulling your smaller body into his arms, your head resting on his chest. It was true, his heartbeat was going frenzy. It feels warm, being in his embrace, surrounded by his scent. It makes you feel safe. You realized you miss this, you miss him. Slowly, you wrap your arms around him– clutching at the fabric of his cardigan.

"I don't know if I can trust you. You were the one who left me behind after all," you mumble into his chest, voice muffled by the fuzzy fabric. He chuckled, tightening the embrace.

"Let me make it up to you, okay?" He assured, kissing the crown of your hair affectionately. You let yourself be comforted by his warmth and steady breath. Loving how he feels around your figure, you nuzzle your face into his neck and let out a relieved exhale.

"Thank you for coming back," you whispered.

You were having a study sleepover with your besties at Wonwoo's house for the upcoming college entrance exam which will be held in 2 weeks.

It's already 2am and your friends are passed out on the couch and the carpet, leaving you alone still trying to answer one more question for the past hour. Wonwoo came back from his room with extra blankets and pillows to place over the scattered boys.

"It's late. You should rest and continue tomorrow," he says, kissing you on the cheeks. You pull back in surprise, afraid that your friends might see you but Wonwoo only smiles and kisses the tip of your nose.

"They're dead asleep, baby" he chuckles. You sighed, falling into his embrace, wrapping your arms around his neck. Your boyfriend tugs you closer to him until you're straddling his lap, wraps his arms around you securely, kissing your temple.

"You're working so hard. I'm so proud of you, baby. You didn't have to worry so much. You'll do just great. I believe in you" he assured, rocking you back and forth in a comforting manner. You hummed, loving the attention he showers you with.

"Let's get you to bed" he says, carrying you up to his bedroom. He took you to the attached bathroom first to let you do your nightly routine, before carrying you to bed and tucking you beneath the soft covers of his queen sized bed.

"Get some sleep, I'll sleep with the boys outside. Just call or come outside if you need me, okay?" He whispers, kissing your forehead and brushing your hair out of your face lovingly.

"Won't you cuddle me first?" You pouted as he moved to leave already.

"Don't act cute like that baby. I'm trying my best to be nice here" he grunted but relents when you bat your eyelashes at him. He slides under the cover with you, immediately tangling himself with you. An arm sliding under your head, another pulling you close by the waist. Your hazel orbs are shimmery from the moonlight that peeks through the curtain and he couldn't stop himself from leaning into you.

He places a soft peck onto your plush lips as if to test the waters. Diving right in when you close your eyes and lean into the kiss. The hand that was on your waist cupped your jaw to tilt your head so he could kiss you better, your lips meshing together in a passionate liplock. You pulled away to gasp for air and he chased you back, capturing your plush pillowy lips in a kiss because he couldn't get enough of you. He's addicted to your taste.

It wasn't long before he pushed you to lay on your back and hover over your small body, forearms bracketing your head. Your arms curling around his neck, nimble fingers playing with the hair on his nape. Your hearts are beating erratically in your chests, excitement thrilling through your veins making you feel as if time stopped and it's only you and him in this world. You love the feeling of being smothered in his scent, overloading your senses. You love the feeling of Wonwoo on top of you.

When Wonwoo pulled away, it's you who chased his soft lips this time. He smiled, resting his forehead on top of yours, breath heavy. You could see it in his beautiful obsidian, the way he looks at you with so much love in them. He doesn't need to spell it to you, because his eyes are already screaming 'I love you, Y/n'. It makes you overwhelmed, that tears start prickling at your waterlines. You pulled him down, flushed against you to hide your face in the crook of his neck.

"I love you"

...

"So, when do we stop acting like we're oblivious about how they're head over heels for each other?" Seungkwan scoffed under his breath, munching at the slightly burnt toast that you made (only because he absolutely loves you) giving his best bombastic side-eye at the two of you being giggly while cooking breakfast like a bunch of teenagers. The three of them are bunched together at the kitchen island, watching the couple being lovey-dovey in front of them.

"I'm actually hurt that they don't trust us enough to tell us the truth," Soonyoung commented, lathering more chocolate spread on his toast.

"I think they have their reasons. You know how timid my brother could be. Plus his position right now has so many disadvantages to him. It could ruin him" Seokmin added.

"Did you think Y/n could ruin him? Are you serious?" Seungkwan was about to throw hands when Seokmin looked at him, eyes serious.

"Not Y/n. Jisoo-hyung. You know how strict Jisoo-hyung could be"

The two went silent. Agreeing with what Seokmin said.

…

"Are you dating Y/n, hyung?" Seokmin asked as Wonwoo drove him from his apartment. He could see his brother froze for a while, knuckles gripping the steering wheel tightly.

"I could see how you look at her with hearts in your eyes, hyung. And she's not any different either" the younger added. He saw Wonwoo hesitated in the corner of his eyes and sighed.

"You know I'm fully on your side, right? I saw the way you looked at her with such adoration from the first time we met her. You've been in love with her for quite a while, right?"

"Seokmin-ah… I…" Wonwoo trailed, unsure how to continue his sentence, biting his lip in anxiousness. Seeing this, Seokmin sighed.

“Hyung, do you know how long I’ve been gatekeeping Y/n for you? Not just me though, both Seungkwan and Soonyoung did. Seungkwan literally chased away a guy who tried to confess to her. You don’t have to be scared, we knew that you’ve like each other since we were kids. And you don’t have to be scared about dating a student. We’ll protect you both until we graduate, only 3 months left. I just need you to trust us. Trust me. I’m on your side” Seokmin assured.

Wonwoo wasn’t able to say anything else after that. His tears kept flowing down his cheeks. He forgot how kind and caring his brother has been. He was honestly glad that at least he has Seokmin on his side in his ‘forbidden love tragedy’ with you.

“Thank you, Seokmin-ah. I really needed to hear that. I’ll see you at school tomorrow. Good luck for CSAT” Wonwoo thanked his brother after he safely parked in the driveway of their family home, wiping his tears with his sweater paws.

“Won’t you look at me or give me a hug though? Am I not your baby anymore?” the younger brother pouted, his arms wide opened for Wonwoo.

“Always my baby. Even until you’re 70” Wonwoo chuckled, pulling his brother towards him and ruffling his hair affectionately. Seokmin giggled happily, nuzzling his nose in his brother’s neck and he squeezed him a little bit tighter.

“Please remember that I am always on your side, hyung. I love you” Seokmin whispered.

The four of you finished CSAT, after struggling for so long, and finally has sometime to enjoy. The school will be holding a Christmas festival before the winter holiday started, so your friends prepared for a performance with Youngji included. They’re only a group of highschool seniors, but they managed to hype the crowd so much that it almost looked like its their concert.

“Y/N!! Come to the stage! Let’s dance!!” Seungkwan screamed from the stage. You laughed and only shook your head from your seat.

“Mr. Jeon! Join us!” Seokmin called, and Soonyoung immediately dragging the older man to the stage to dance with them. Wonwoo is surprisingly a good dancer, you never knew that and were impressed that he managed to keep up with the boys despite just seeing the choreography. He was smiling so shyly when the students cheer him on for a solo dance break.

Your eyes met his, and he blushed madly– tearing his gaze away. He complained that he’s too tired for hardcore dancing but continued to dance for them when the trio gave his their puppy eyes. Its cute, to see such scenes again after a long time of being apart and hiding beneath the student - teacher facade.

Wonwoo sang a song after that, it was a song that he and Seokmin frequently sing, a song you knew all too well– ‘It Must Have been Love’. The whole school went into uproar at the sound of his voice, it was so beautiful, fitting for a man as beautiful as him. It was deep but it’s also so soft that it touched your heart. Wonwoo’s fanclub is cheering madly, lining up at the front of the stage to get a closer look at the young teacher.

“Wow! Such a beautiful song and beautiful voice! Mr. Jeon, who hurt you that badly for you to sing this tearful song?” Mr. Yoon coos.

“Ah, no… I’m just singing it” Wonwoo answered timidly, a shy smile on his lips as he fleeted a glance towards where you were standing on the upper corridor of the school hall. He doesn’t notice it but his fangirls followed his gaze towards you and whispered amongst them.

“What a bad girl. Please be nice your boyfriend girlies, we have feelings too. Or else, all of us will end up heartbroken like Mr. Jeon here” Mr. Yoon tuts playfully, patting Wonwoo on the back. You on the other hand notices the glares his fangirls threw your way, but you pay them no mind. Your eyes met with Seungkwan, the latter just nodding along signalling you he got what you were thinking about.

It’s almost the end of school day when your instincts prove you right. You were dragged by a bunch of girls to the swimming pool– pushed to stand on the edge while the rest of them surrounded you. You knew why they deliberately chose to drag you here, out of all the places in the school, because this is the only place Wonwoo would not come into. The safest place to assault someone because of him, in the name of ‘protecting’ him. Plus, it’s winter right now and the pool is out of bounds for the students.

“Are you Mr. Jeon’s ex-girlfriend?” one of them asked. She was the supposed leader of the fanclub, a self-proclaimed fan of the Math teacher. You remained stoic, showing no emotions on your face.

“I knew you were childhood friends with his brother, Seokmin. but , you dared to flirt with him too? And even broke his heart? And now you’re dating his brother?” another voice condemned.

“What has all that information has anything to do with you guys?” you questioned, unbothered.

“Aren’t you being a bitch right now?! You hurt Mr. Jeon’s feelings and now you’re playing with his brother. You think we’ll let a girl like you get close with them? Who do you think you are?” the leader yelled.

“Damn girl, your voice,” you winces, glaring at her. You stood up straighter, raising one eyebrows in a challenging manner.

“Do you think Mr. Jeon would appreciate you harrassing his ‘ex’ like this behind his back? Do you actually think he’d thanked you guys for dealing with his ‘ex’ for him? At the place he fears the most? Stop being delusional” you scoffed.

“We don’t care what he thinks. We’re dealing with you here because you don’t deserve to be around them at all. Not a poor girl like you with no dad! Mr. Jeon and Seokmin are precious, someone as disgusting as you doesn’t deserve to hover around them. We’re protecting them!”

“You don’t care what he thinks and yet you say you’re protecting them? What a contradiction. How can you guys be so selfish? It’s embarrassing” you chuckled, sarcasm heavy in your tone.

“Who do you think you are, you rude bitch?!” the leader screamed in your face, tugging at the collar of your coat harshly.

“I’m his student, who actually cares about what he thinks unlike you guys” you spat, successfully irritating the girls more. You only managed to hear the door to the pool bursts open and a shout before you were thrown into the water, your heavy backpack and thick coat pulling you down even more. Shucking off your backpack to lessen the weight, then you tried to remove your heavy coat. But you realized you’ll be drowned even before you manage to unbutton the fabric.

“Seungkwan-ah!” you gasped, hanging off the edge of the pool. You noticed it was Mr. Yoon who was scolding the girls and no Wonwoo in sight.

“Gosh, what happened to you?” Seungkwan muttered angrily, hauling you out of the water like a fish caught. You panted, breathing heavily as you lay down on the edge, gulping as much air as you could.

“What happened here? This is a prohibited place during winter. Did the school not tell you that? You are seniors already,” Mr. Yoon scolded, looking between you and the groupies.

“I don’t have anything to say. I was dragged here without consent” you answered, trembling from the cold of the wet clothes. Soonyoung burst in through the door a second later, towels and your gym clothes in his hands.

“What happened? Seungkwan told me to bring you your gym clothes and towels here?” he rushed, panicked to see your state.

“Go change first, we’ll talk after that” Mr. Yoon ordered. Seungkwan pulled you up to stand on your feet, then helped you shrugged the heavy fabric off your shoulders– leaving you in your uniform. You trotted to the bathroom with spare clothes in hand.

“You’re lucky its close to graduation that these kind of things happened. Or else, I’m not sure what the principal will do with you. Y/n, go collect your things from the pool, the rest of you go straight home” Mr. Yoon sighed. You just nodded and walked away, fetching your stuff that the janitor had helped fished out of the pool. You thanked them, wished them a happy holiday and began dragging the wet stuff behind you.

You told Seungkwan and Soonyoung to go first since they had to run errands for their family and Seokmin has gone home with his brother. You’re glad that the brothers weren’t around when something like this happened, because to you, it’s embarrassing. To be bullied at this age, and because of something so ridiculous. You’re used to be mocked as poor girl without a dad, you can take it all and it wasn’t as bad before because Seungkwan and Soonyoung were always there to chase off anyone who dares to open their mouth to insult you. But now that Wonwoo is here, it became terribly worse, just because you have that ‘childhood friend’ connection with him.

You won’t tell him what happened today either, because you refused to make him worry and blame himself. Wonwoo doesn’t deserve that. So, when Wonwoo appeared in front of your door teary-eyed that night, you knew things are about to go down real bad.

“I’m in love with Y/n”

Jisoo, who had just came home that day for Christmas went silent. His smile fell and the air around them hangs heavy. Your mom was with them in the living room too, while you were out with your friends for Christmas shopping. Wonwoo, who was sitting on his knees kept his head low, eyes staring at his fists that were clenching the fabrics of his slacks tightly on his lap.

“What? I didn’t catch you” Jisoo questioned, trying to put a smile on his face again.

“I’m in love with Y/n. I’ve been dating her for almost 3 months. And, I know that I shouldn’t keep this from you because you are my best friend. I’m sorry, Jisoo” Wonwoo explained. A punch was thrown, and the younger guy ended up on the floor, clutching his bruised cheek.

“She’s a minor, you bastard! And your student! Are you crazy??? She’s my baby!” Jisoo yelled, throwing punches after punches until he ended up straddling Wonwoo’s torso and hit him continuously.

“Jisoo! Stop, you’re hurting him” his mom called out.

“I trusted you! And this is what you did to me? You’re sick! Going after my sister behind my back?!!” Jisoo yelled, still punching him– not caring about his mom's cries. His best friend laid there, just taking the hits given to him without any fights at all.

You ran back home after getting a call from your mother, saying your brother is livid and has been beating the living out of his best friend, with your best friends in tow. As soon as you opened the door, your heart broke at the sight of Wonwoo, bloodied and pliant under your brother who was still screaming at him and punching his face.

“JISOO! ENOUGH!” You screamed, pulling him back by his shoulder only for you to receive a punch on your face too, making you stumble back.

“Jisoo! What are you doing?! It’s your sister!” your mom screamed, rushing towards you to make sure you’re okay. You stood up quickly, pulling your brother off Wonwoo with all your might and threw him on the couch.

“Take Wonwoo away, Seokmin. Call an ambulance, make sure he’s okay” you say before Jisoo yanks your hair harshly.

“YOU’RE SIDING WITH HIM?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” he yelled in your face.

“I should be the one to ask that! What’s wrong with you? He’s your best friend” you shouted back, trying to get him to release you.

“I have no best friend who’s a sicko like him! And you shouldn’t be around someone like that!” he exclaimed, throwing you away harshly until your side hits the coffee table.

“I’m turning 18 in 2 weeks! I can do what I wish. You have no control over me” you argued, only to earn you a harsh slap to your left cheek, making you fall to the floor, your lips cracking from the impact. You wince in pain, but the stinging in your scalp is back when your hair is pulled harshly again, to make you look at your brother. His eyes are crazy right now, it scares you to the core. Your mom froze on her spot to see his son beating up his sister for being in a relationship with his best friend but at this point, she wasn’t so sure what was the reason behind this fight anymore.

She looked to her right, to your three best friends, who was busy tending to Wonwoo, while waiting for the ambulance to arrive. Her eyes made contact with Soonyoung, who came up to her and pulled her into an embrace.

You didn’t realize how long had you been fighting with your brother, you feel lightheaded after bumping your head on the drawer when you’re struggling with Jisoo who went insane.

“I SENT YOU TO SCHOOL FOR YOU TO STUDY! NOT FOR YOU TO FLIRT WITH THIS MOTHERFUCKER! HOW MANY MORE BEATINGS SHOULD I GIVE YOU FOR YOU TO GET THAT IN YOUR STUPID BRAIN?!” another punch to your right cheek this time, before the weight on your body is pulled off of you.

Jisoo is being pulled away by police officers from what you could see with your blurry vision, Wonwoo being taken away into an ambulance with Seokmin following him. You saw Soonyoung who was patting your mom on the back to calm her crying, then you saw the phone clutched tightly in her hand. You heard Seungkwan calling for you from your side but your eyes locked with your mom's.

“I’m sorry, mom” you breathed before your vision turned black.

…

You opened your eyes three days later, in a hospital with only your mom with you. She looked sad and stressed. Her eyes are tired, there are bags under them. She told you that Seokmin, Seungkwan and Soonyoung had testified against Jisoo, for assaulting them and the judges are waiting for you to release his verdict.

“Are you sure you want to do this, mom? He’s your son” you say quietly, toying with your food. Your mom stayed silent, folding the towels and clothes into the cabinet as she tidied up your space.

“We can drop the charges and let him free, if you want. I mean, being in the prison must be hard for him–”

“And what? Let him hurt you again? He may be my son, but you are my daughter too. He went on about Wonwoo betraying his trust but he betrayed mine too! He hurt you behind my back. No, actually, this is my fault for always absent. For not being there for you, I was afraid that we wouldn’t get enough to eat to abandon your safety. You must have been so scared, my baby” your mother broke down. Her hands clutching at your shoulders tightly.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry…”

“Let’s get you to testify, okay? He deserves a punishment” your mom sobbed, and you only nodded.

When she learned how long you had been beaten by Jisoo, your mother broke down.

At the age of eleven, you had to face your brother's wrath even though it was never your fault to begin with. You had shielded your friends from Jisoo's assault when they accidentally knocked over a plate one day when they came over. It started light, with just a cane but Jisoo eventually lost his control seeing how well you took the beatings.

Seungkwan had begged you to tell your mom and asked for help, but you refused because you solely believed that might hurt Jisoo. You believed that Jisoo had become like this because he's been exhausted and overworked since you came to live with them. So the only way to help him is to let him punish you.

But what you didn't know is that he became addicted with that power he had over you. He had someone he can lash out to when something goes wrong.

"He told me it was for my own good, it was my punishment for being naughty. So, I gladly accepted it and kept quiet," you said silently, not looking the police officer in the eyes. Your mother felt like her heart had been ripped out of her chest, punching the air out of her lungs.

"What's the worst injury he inflicted on you?" The officer asked, jotting down on his notebook.

"I broke my arm once when I tried to cover myself. Twisted my ankle when he pushed me down two flights of stairs and hit my head on the dresser a couple times" you tried not to look at your mom, when she let out a shuddering breath, she was seated on the chair next to your bed, trying to hold back her tears from falling.

The police officer turned towards your mother with a grim expression coloring his face. You knew it wouldn't be good news, Jisoo might be prisoned for more than a year, if you're well averse about the law. The two adults walked out of the room, to talk amongst themselves and you found yourself reaching for your phone on the side table.

There was a text from Seokmin, saying he's there too in the hospital with Wonwoo but his parents won't let him see you due to the situation with Jisoo.

'But, they're not here now,' was all it took for you to make a mad dash towards the upper floors where Wonwoo's ward was located. You got a stern scolding from the nurse to be careful which you only apologized sheepishly and continued your journey.

You saw Seokmin standing in front of a door to a ward room, scrolling down at his phone, with a worried look on his face.

"Seokmin," you called out weakly, feeling your muscles burn from your sudden spree. He saw you and quickly rushed towards you to pull you into his embrace. Seokmin was crying, apologizing for not coming to you quickly.

"It's fine. There's nothing you can do. Your parents must have their reasons to not let me see you anymore" you say but he shook his head, pulling away to look at you with teary eyes and a pout on his pretty face.

"You know you'll always be my best friend right? I'll find a way to go see you after this, so don't be sad, okay? I'll bring Wonu too" he sobbed, unable to stop the tears streaming down his cheeks. He said that, but he's crying harder than you are. But, only because Seokmin is such a pure soul who is so sensitive about everything, and tends to cry easily, especially at other people's misery.

You followed the boy into the ward room to check on his brother, and your heart broke yet again at the sight of your boyfriend. His beautiful face was littered with red and purple bruises everywhere, lips cracked at the sides, cuts on his forehead and the underside of his brow.

"I'm sorry that I let this happen to you," you croaked, gently caressing his face with your knuckles. Wonwoo stirred in his sleep, brows furrowing. You reached for something in the pocket of your coat, something that you stuffed there in a rush to get home from shopping the other day.

It was a box of a silver bracelet that you bought for him. It wasn't really expensive, but you still worked your ass off for it. It was a simple silver bracelet, with a diamond shaped piece with his name and a cute cat as charms.

You put it on him, loving the way it dangles around his left wrist prettily. Seokmin was guarding the door, constantly checking his phone in case his parents decided to come back.

"I have to go now. I'll come back to you again, when the time is right, I promise. I love you so much" you sobbed, kissing the crown of his hair and forehead. Seokmin, who heard what you said, turned his head towards you so quickly he almost gave himself a whiplash, eyes widening in terror.

"What… What are you saying? You're talking like you want to go somewhere far. Like you won't see us again. What are you planning?!" He urged, panic lacing in his voice. He grabbed your arms, squeezing them tightly without meaning to and only stopped when you wince in pain.

"What are you planning? Don't go, don't go anywhere. You know none of this was your fault right? You couldn't have guessed he would do that to my brother, to his best friend! You did everything you could, Y/n, don't go" Seokmin pleaded, fat droplets of tears rolling down his face again. He's hiccuping now, from how bad he's sobbing, shaking your smaller form to listen to him.

You don't say anything, only smiling sadly at him which made him break down even more. You pulled him into a hug, rubbing circles on his back as he sobbed.

"I'm sorry, Seokmin. Please tell Seungkwan and Soonyoung too. I love you guys so much. Thank you for being my friends" you choked, voice breaking at the end.

Just like that, you disappeared from their life.

10 years later.

You arrived at the lobby for the engagement party that will be held on the garden rooftop of the hotel. Nervously, you stood in front of the large mirror to check your outfit and makeup. You were wearing a long, backless, black satin slip dress with cowl neck, and spaghetti straps. There's a slit up to your thigh, and you wore a pair of black pumps to match the dress, and a small clutch bag in your hand.

You haven't attended an engagement party in a while, much less one of your closest friends is the host so you're very nervous. You took a very long time to choose the outfit, until you thought black is the safest option, so you went with it.

Glancing at the mirror one last time, you sighed heavily before making way towards the elevator. It was early spring, still a bit chilly but the weather was so nice and the flowers started to bloom already, decorating the glass hall with beautiful colors.

Pushing open the heavy set of doors, your eyes met with the ones you haven't met in 10 years, one of your best friends, Seungkwan.

“You bitch, is that really you Hong Y/n?!” He screamed, gaining the attention of the small crowd who was already there. You cowered, not liking the attention, pressing your pointer finger on your lips to shut him up.

“Did you know how long I've been trying to find you?! You didn't even tell me you're leaving, you nasty piece of shit and now you're suddenly back?! How dare you, you bastard–” Seungkwan cursed before he practically bawled his eyes out right then and there.

“Seungkwan-ah, no! Not now, please, I'm sorry” you begged, pulling him into your arms trying to hold back your tears. You know you will cry tonight, the only reason you're putting on absolutely waterproof makeup tonight, but you still try not to cry, at least not this early into the party.

“I miss you, you piece of shit. How are you alive without me? Who reminded you to take all those vitamins if it's not me?! At least you're looking so snatched so I'm not gonna be ashamed to admit you as my best friend” He grumbled, pulling away to look at your face as fat tears still rolled down his eyes.

“It's you, I was reminded of your voice nagging me all the time, if I dared to skip my vitamins. Thank you for keeping me alive, even from far away” you laughed, wiping his tears with your thumbs. He rolled his eyes at you, while muttering a small “of course”.

“Come on, Soonyoung's with the DJ. He needs to see you” he said, tangling your arms together and navigating you through the hall to go meet Soonyoung. But, you bumped into someone you missed so dearly on the way there. The reason why you left South Korea in the first place to study abroad.

“Wonwoo-hyung! Y/nie is back! See!” Seungkwan chirped excitedly. Wonwoo was frozen in his spot, eyes wide open as saucers. He still looked dashing as always, in his black suit with black tie, hair slicked black neatly with black horn-rimmed glasses decorating his handsome face. His obsidian jewel met yours, there's flashes of emotions in them and you could even see them turned glassy before someone interrupted your moment.

“Wonu, who's this?” Someone asked, it was a woman's voice and you barely managed to hold your glare before turning towards the voice. She was standing close to Wonwoo's side, looking up at him before turning towards you, giving you once over.

“It's my best friend, Y/nie. Y/n, this is Yul-noona. Wonwoo-hyung’s… er…” Seungkwan trailed, looking everywhere until the lady connected the sentence.

“Future fiancée. I'm his future fiancée” she answered, holding out her hand for you to shake. A smile curls on her lips. You could see Wonwoo's jaw tightened, the look in his eyes hardened, like he didn't want to be there, as if he wished the ground would just open up and swallow him.

“I'm Hong Y/n. The old friend. Nice to meet you” you smiled, it was fake, but still a smile– shaking her hand. You swore you could see the hurt in the older man's eyes when you introduced yourself as the old friend, nothing more than that. She couldn't see this, but you know Wonwoo's hinting something towards you, he's letting you see the emotions in his eyes but there's nothing you can do.

Of course, you expected this. No one is willing to wait for someone that long. People are bound to get tired at some point. It wasn't Wonwoo's fault that he found someone to replace you. In fact, you dated some guys too, when you're trying to move on from him. But you broke it all off because it wasn't fair for them. But still, it still hurts like a bitch to see him with a woman that's not you. Wonwoo is making plans to have a family with a woman that's not you, and you couldn't do anything about it.

You excused yourself with Seungkwan in search of Soonyoung, and you could see the latter was babbling nonsense at the DJ who looked so done before the party even started. You laughed.

“Kwon Soonyoung!” Seungkwan called out, pointing towards you as soon as the said male turned towards him. Soonyoung visibly gasped, before jumping off the stage to make a dash towards you. He practically swept you off your feet as he twirled you around before embracing you in a tight hug.

“I miss you!! How the hell did you end up here, not that that matters because I'm so happy to see you again but how the hell?!!” he cried, pulling away, squishing your cheeks with both of his hands.

“I met her at a conference 2 years ago and have been in contact since then. So I invited her today,” a voice answered from behind Soonyoung. It was the soon-to-be groom himself, Seokmin.

“Minie~” you coo, moving to give him a hug too which he gladly accepted with tiny jumps.

“WHAT THE FUCK?! 2 YEARS?? AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO TELL US?!” Seungkwan barked, pulling you away from Seokmin to nag at him, eyes blazing with betrayal.

“DID YOU NOT TRUST US TOO JUST LIKE HOW Y/NIE AND WONWOO-HYUNG KEPT THEIR RELATIONSHIP A SECRET FROM US 10 YEARS AGO?!” Soonyoung added. You flinched from their loud voices, and you could feel all eyes looking at you, including Wonwoo and Yul’s.

“Let's not do this here, I was just respecting Y/n’s decision. She wasn't ready to come back so I wanted to give her time” Seokmin reasoned. The two calmed down almost immediately, frown disappearing as they looked over your form and crowd over you to pull you into a hug.

The rest of the party went smoothly, it was fun. As it turns out, Seokmin's fiancée was your roommate back in college. She went back to Korea as soon as you graduated and you haven't had the chance to reconnect with her until now. You were really happy for them, because they really suit each other, and are so sickeningly in love. What a small world.

You were just sitting at your table, watching the couple dance to the slow beat of the song, while your other two rowdy friends were going around practically everywhere, hyping up the crowd.

“Can I sit next to you?” A voice asked and you just agreed without thinking, only to see that it was Wonwoo. You froze.

“They're still rowdy as always, aren't they?” He chuckled, trying to make a conversation with you. You just smiled and nodded.

“How are you doing? I haven't seen you in so long” he inquired, slowly swirling the glass of red wine in his hand.

“I'm fine. Just alive and breathing,” you say with a sigh. You couldn't understand why it hurts to talk to him again. Maybe because your heart still yearns for him but he doesn't reciprocate that.

You were the one who left him– your mind supplies helpfully.

“How are you?” You asked, wouldn't want to seem rude and uncaring. He was silent for a while before letting out a rather heavy exhale.

“To be honest, when you left, I wasn't myself. I went insane. I went crazy, I was mad. I cried every single day. I can't accept the fact that you left me. But then I remembered I was the one who left first. I remember Seokmin telling me how sad and heartbroken you were. Even at that time, it must have been very heartbreaking for you too, wasn't it?” Wonwoo said, his voice was soft and soothing and you missed it so bad. You were silent, so he continued.

“I'm sorry that I didn't notice you were in pain. I'm sorry that you had to go through all those painful moments alone. You were so small, but you're so strong at the same time. Seokmin told me that you protected me with your body that day too. Thank you, for being so brave, Y/n” he added, his voice faltering, dark eyes glimmering with unshed tears under the lights. He reached out to give your hand a squeeze, and immediately, droplets of tears fell on his knuckles when you looked down to see how easily he covered your smaller hand in his bigger ones.

Wonwoo almost wants to pull you towards him and give you kisses until you calmed down. You were whimpering sadly, like you're in pain but he had to settle with just squeezing your tiny hands for comfort.

“I'm going to the toilet, please excuse me” you stood up abruptly from your seat to leave the hall in search of a washroom. You left your clutch bag on the table so Wonwoo took it to bring it to you.

–

“Why are you doing this?! She's your sister!”

“It's not about my sister. It's about you! Stop dragging her into this!”

“What about me? Why can't you understand that I don't want him? I love you! And I know you do too,”

“No! Why are you settling for someone like me?! Wonwoo is a good guy, he can take good care of you, you two can be happy together–”

“We can't! We've tried this for almost a year, Jisoo. It won't work. Our hearts won't let us be together. I don't want him and he doesn't want me too. He loves someone else and you know that too!”

You froze when you heard Jisoo's name. You turned around to see Wonwoo behind you with your clutch in his hand. He had a sullen expression on his face. You turned back to confront the arguing pair, your eyes widened when you saw your brother.

“Y/n why– how are you here?” Jisoo stuttered, his eyes not believing what he saw in front of him.

“Why?” You asked., trying your hardest to stay calm despite your almost leaping out of your chest.

“Why what? What are you saying?” He questioned.

“Why did you say ‘why are you settling for someone like me’? What's wrong with you?” You retorted fist clenching at your sides to hide the fact that you're still shaking at the sight of your brother.

“Everything is wrong with me! You out of all people should know that. You didn't remember what I did to you? To your friends? To my best friend?” He asked.

“Mom told me you've been reflecting on yourself, going on therapies and you've been doing so well. So what's with you degrading yourself like this?” You gritted out. Jisoo was taken aback that you've been keeping up with him through your mom. He didn't think you'd care about him anymore after what he did to you. He thought you'd hate him.

“I don't deserve to be loved anymore after what I did to my baby sister, Y/n” he croaked, trying to hold back his tears.

“Who said that? These people know you're trying, I know. So what else matters?”

“Y/n…” Jisoo called, taking a step towards you which you responded by jumping back involuntarily, startled.

“You're still afraid of me,” he frowned.

“I- I do. But it doesn't mean that I hate you. I don't. And you're still my only brother. But give me some time to be able to be near you again. So don't do that, don't push the people who love you away. You've suffered enough” you rushed to answer. Jisoo's frown melted into a soft smile. His hand reached out to hold Yul’s, squeezing it softly.

“Do you still love him?” Jisoo asked you. You were silent for a bit and you could hear a breath hitched from behind you.

“I do. Even after all these years, all these mess and pains. I still love him very much. Even if I tried dating other guys, I only ended up breaking their hearts because I couldn't let him go. Even if he doesn't love me anymore, I still do” you breathed, the tears that had stopped a while ago coming back, wetting your cheeks.

Your brother stared at the person behind you, a soft and apologetic smile pursed on his face.

“You have your answer,” he said. Immediately, that person is intertwining his fingers with yours, tugging you along with him to who knows where. You arrived at the parking lot, and before you could comprehend anything, Wonwoo is shoving a helmet on your head, buckling it securely. He then zipped up a leather jacket around you that he stored under the seat of his big motorbike.

“Hop on,” he called out, staring at you with shiny and hopeful eyes but you're not entirely sure if your dress tonight is made for bike riding but who cares about that when you have gleaming kitten eyes in front of you.

Wonwoo made you wrap your arms around him securely after you finished tucking your skirt so the fabrics won't get caught in the rims.

“What the fuck!! Wonwoo, too fast!” You screamed as he zoomed away through the night, passing buildings and trees. You're not sure where he's taking you but you just got to trust him. You ended up in another parking lot, this time it was in an apartment complex.

It was somewhat familiar, maybe you have been here before but you’re not remembering it clearly. But then it came back to you in slow motions, as Wonwoo guided you through the hallway towards his apartment. He let you in as you took hesitant steps, removing your heels at the doorway as he shuffled inside, turning on the lights to illuminate the dark apartment. It was just as you remember, the change being he has more shelves now and there’s cat towers, box houses and playpens.

“I’m home,” he said and a bunch of furry little kids, three to be exact– surround him in an instant. They were all black. He immediately took a seat in the middle of the living room to let those kids hover around him, asking for attention. A curious little one sneaked on you, sniffing at your legs who was still standing awkwardly at the doorway. A thought appeared in your head and you looked at Wonwoo who only smiled as if he understood what you were thinking.

“Are they Mong’s family?” you asked, remembering the black cat that you picked up from the street on your way home from school back then.

“Yeah. One of them was her child. The other two, I adopted them 3 years ago,” he explained. You looked around, for a sign of Mong, thinking she might be sleeping or hiding as she’s a senior already.

“Mong had passed. Last week. She had missed you terribly ever since you left, barely survived when she was delivering, only one of her litters survived, who are looking at you right now. We stayed together comforting each other these whole time but I think she needed to rest now. I kept her ash after cremation in case you’d want to see her when you came back,” he says, standing up to take your hand and tug you towards the glass shelf next to his TV. he showed you the small urn that kept your beloved pet’s ashes and the small memorial space he made for her.

“I’m sorry I was so late…” you croaked, choking up on your tears again.

“Since when have you become such a cry baby? My Y/n was very brave back then” he chuckled, teasing you as he pulled you into his warm embrace. You love the way he called you as ‘his’, your heart fluttering in your chest. Inhaling his musky scent, you let your head rest on his broad shoulder.

“It’s you. For me, it’s still you. The one for me, it’s still you. It has never changed, after all these time, no matter how far apart we are, for me it’s still you. Even when you weren’t here with me, the way I live resemble you. I was able to be brave because you taught me to, and that I knew you’ll come back, eventually. I won’t let you go anymore, not anymore, ever. I love you, Y/n. i love you very, very much. Will you please be mine again?”

He was hugging you so closely to his chest, letting you hear his frenzied heartbeat, large hands at the small of your back and one your nape. You were silent because you’re basking in his warmth but he mistook it for disagreement so he pulled away, to look at you, panic in his eyes.

“I’m sorry for proposing like this, I promise I’ll buy you rings, I’ll buy you a house, a car if that’s what you want, anything, can you please let me be yours again? I promise I’ll bring you a ring next time, tomorrow even! Please be mine–” he rambled, eyes looking everywhere until you squish his cheeks with your hands. His eyes blinked in confusion.

“Nonu, calm down!” you laughed softly at his panicked state, your eyes crinkling. Thumbs gently caressing his handsome face as you stared at him. Wonwoo calmed down when he saw the look in your eyes.

He realized you weren’t planning to go anywhere anymore, that you're right there, in front of him, ready to listen to whatever he has to say. Not moving even an inch away from his hold. You're there, with him, at last.

The dam to his waterlines broke, clear droplets streaming down like waterfalls. The relief washing his form to know that you're finally there, in his arms is beyond his imagination. He couldn't utter how happy he is at the moment, how grateful he felt.

“It's still you” he choked out, pulling you flush against him, face hiding in the crook of your neck. Hands resting on your hips, he let out shuddered breaths, before wrapping his arms tighter around your torso, engulfing you fully in his warmth. You curled your own set of arms around his neck, fingers playing with his hair on his nape while your other hand patted his back comfortingly.

“It's still you for me too. I love you, Wonu. I'm all yours. Has always been and will always be,” you whispered into his ears. He pulled away again to stare at you, your eyes twinkling under the dim lighting of his living room. You wipe away his tears with your thumb, cooing at how cute he looked, like a lost kitten and he pouted, before a smile crawling across his features again. He nuzzled his nose with yours, slowly leaning and capturing your lips in a soft kiss, sealing the vow of love you shared.

He misses this, misses your touch and your lingering scent floating around him, burning his skin. Before he could deepen the kiss, you pulled away in a hurry, scrambling to find your clutch bag that you've forgotten.

“What's wrong?” He asked, tone heavy with concern as he eyes your form crouching down on the floor to pull something out of the bag. His eyes widened when he saw a black velvet box with matching rings in it. The design was simple and elegant but he could tell how much thought you put into it. To say he was impressed was an understatement, because it was beyond that. You never fail to amaze him.

“I did say I'll come back to you again when the time is right. So, I've been preparing these for almost a year and got this custom made to our sizes and designed it according to our preference. But you were planning to get engaged with someone else?! I almost threw it in your face!” you say before ended up grumbling cutely at him, a pout on your lips.

He laughed at you, no wonder you were trying so hard not to glare at Yul when she came to him earlier. Instead of being disappointed, you were actually mad that someone tried to take him away from you. This side of you has always been amusing to him.

“Why are you laughing? Did you not see how close she was standing next to you? Are you sure you deserve this? Or, I will return it to the store later–”

“We love each other right? We just sealed our vows with a kiss. Am I not the rightful lover of yours? I wanna be yours, so you should put a mark on me so that today's incident won't happen again. If it did, you can just give them your hardest glare, babe. You looked so hot earlier,” he snickered, arms coiling around your waist.

“Are you playing with me right now?” You eyed him suspiciously. He grinned lopsidedly, before shaking his head, then planting kisses all over your face.

“I'm all yours, baby. But, I'll buy us our rings next time. I can't let my baby be my provider even though I know you're more than able to afford it now. But, give me my chance to pamper you like a spoilt princess you deserve to be” he coos. You finally laugh, finding it ridiculous how you're all tears earlier and all of sudden, bickering like you used to be out of jealousy and adoration. He smiles when you slide the ring onto his ring finger and he does the same to you, ending it with a kiss to your ring finger.

You kissed again, passionately this time, with a promise to stay together through life, never running away from each other again. Promising to still be each other's lover until the end of time.

-Fin-

#seventeen wonwoo #svt angst #seventeen x reader #svt fanfic #wonwoo x reader #wonwoo #wonwoo angst #hongmingoo #wonwoo x y/n #wonwoo fluff #seventeen angst

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naamahdarling · 3 months ago

Note

My dad and I are planning to go to the Tulsa zoo for the first time in 20 years, what are your can't-miss zoo exhibits?

You're in for a treat, they've done a lot to make it a lot nicer than it was.

Right up front: You can rent wheelchairs or electric scooters now if you need one. It's $30 for a scooter which is more than I think it should be, but at least they're there. Bring some $1 and $5 bills and some quarters if you want to get souvenir coins or pressed pennies. Gift shop employees usually know where the machines are, there's multiple throughout the park but they move occasionally. (I collect these so I plan around them.)

The new elephant habitat just opened, a BADLY needed improvement, I was very uncomfortable with where their male was housed, he was showing stereotypic behavior. They knew it was an issue and instead of halfassing something they just made something totally new and apparently really amazing. I haven't been to see it yet, but we are going very soon. They're redoing a big part of that side to be a better savannah exhibit, actually, so the east side of the park is a bit sparse.

The rest under a cut. I love our zoo.

Definitely hit the Malayan tiger exhibit, which is close to the front and can be easily visited no matter what other parts of the park you want to see. The female just had babies and I think the daddy is still there too, so even if she isn't out, he might be. The tigers are very comfortable with people. Genuinely. They are often very close to the glass. I have seen them almost every time I have been. Also close to the entrance are the snow leopards, siamangs, and red pandas/binturongs. One siamang female had a baby early last year and they are both beautiful, I got to see the baby when she was VERY NEW. Such tiny hands! Perfect little thing!

The old old old string of four(?) connected buildings devoted to different habitats and stuff have undergone some light remodeling, but last I saw were still rather underwhelming and the exteriors are pretty decrepit now. They were blocked off last time I was there for some repairs and renovations so IDK what they have done or if they are open yet. Ask at the front if you intend to go through but I wouldn't necessarily plan on it unless it's significantly nostalgic for you. The Arctic building is open AFAIK and the zoo's brown bear is out front for the time being, and you don't have to go inside to see the outside of the enclosure. She REALLY likes hanging out near the window and scaring children by opening her mouth suddenly so you might see her.

Hit the Amazon rainforest. It's really nice, and the old lady jaguar auntie besties/girlfriends are there. Chel has been there since she was a baby and I had a really cool interaction with her when she was young so I feel personally attached. Not sure if you ever were there, but they have done a little work on it inside and it's even nicer than it was. There's a part with dart poison frogs! Just hopping around in the open!

The reptile and avian building way in back needs expanding, I think they are redoing it soon? Don't wear yourself out going there. There is however a quiet indoor area right near there for families with autistic kids who need a break and I think also nursing parents?

We are freshly down to one lion who I think is elderly and doesn't come out much, and that whole run of exhibits that used to have bear, lion, tiger, and snow leopard is sort of abandoned right now as they have plans to redo it all, so don't go that way. There are some animals there, I think a bear and one other critter? But it isn't the best use of time.

On the east or southeast, the meerkats are lively and curious and actively seem to enjoy coming over to look at humans. Penguin exhibit is good, and the sea lions. I have never seen the African painted dogs, their area has a lot of cover.

If you have limited time or just tire easily, USE THE TRAIN. Rides are not too expensive. Either take the train to the very back and walk out, or walk to the back and take the train out. Riding TO the back takes you east, it's a pretty ride past a lot of stuff you might want to skip on foot, riding FROM the back takes you west, past a lot of stuff worth seeing, so I recommend going from back to front. It's less tiring anyway. Once you're tired you're already headed out.

Museum gift shop staff are predominantly queer and in my experience they know a lot about what is going on in the zoo in general and probably that day. They might have local zoo honey available right now. Ask, and if they do, get some, it's incredible. The flowers there are abundant and lovely and the honey is incredibly flavorful in a layered way that single-crop honey isn't.

If you see a docent in a building, please talk to them. They LOVE their job and AFAIK are still all volunteers. They have their speeches they give to groups, yes, but if you catch them alone they have even more interesting stuff to share that isn't calibrated for people new to the basics and is more entertaining. The elderly white lady often near the tigers and Komodo dragons is just great. She loves those lizards so much.

If you are on SNAP, you get in I think free, and with a guest.

I have to say and want to acknowledge that the Tulsa Zoo used to be terrible. Jane Goodall shit-talked it, okay? Like, I won't repeat what she said because I don't think it was on record and if it wasn't intended for the public I don't want to put it out there, but it was savage, and painfully accurate. (My ex and I did some docent training there, until I had to drop out because I caught a cold. The Goodall story was relayed by the head primate zookeeper.)

But because they have been CONSTANTLY devising new exhibits and finishing very cool improvements I am comfortable supporting them even though parts of it do still need work.

There's a couple of very wealthy donors and organizations that contribute IMMENSELY to the zoo and to our museums and parks and libraries, and most of the big renovations were done with those grants. Those donors aren't going anywhere, they are genuinely behind the things they support, so it will just continue to get better, and patronage helps show donors and investors and the zoo itself that the work they have done is appreciated. The Tulsa Zoo's rejuvenation is a real success story and I am very proud of them.

It used to be so bad but now they have stuff like the Lost Kingdom with the tiger skybridge and the Komodo dragons and the beautiful architecture and landscaping, and you can see what they're consistently moving towards. More room, and more room back where you can't SEE it so the animals can chill away from people (if one of the newer enclosures look small, there is probably a lot of room in back). The bigger animals are never forced to be close to people. (For reptiles and other smaller critters this is not universal, but they are working on it.)

Anyway yeah it's not that big or flashy I guess but it's ours and I do love it and it keeps getting better.

I hope you have a great time! Let me know!

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abibliophobiaa · 1 year ago

Note

a little blurb about babys first halloween? from daylight?

baby blurb from the ‘daylight’ universe, wherein one night stand on halloween changes everything.

dad!eddie munson x mom!reader

——

“I can’t believe you made our baby dress up as a rat,” you grumbled, adjusting the little hood on your daughter’s more-mouse-than-rat costume. A gummy smile greeted you, something she’d only recently started doing. “Eddie, are you almost ready? Chrissy and Steve will be here with Melody soon.”

“One second, trying to recreate the magic of the night we met, you know? Needs to be perfect.” He thundered down the hall to where you stood in the kitchen, Elena curled into your side. “Minus the making of party favor number two, obviously.”

“Party favor number one needs to be sleeping through the night and walking before I even consider it,” you teased, grinning into a kiss as your “Westley” leaned down to press a lingering kiss to your lips.

“We had to stay on theme,” he argued, in reference to the baby rat/mouse on your hip. “And she’s the cutest little ROUS I ever did see. Isn’t that right, Elena?”

Her reply was a coo, and you watched as Eddie’s heart melted all over again for his little girl. Smitten, he was absolutely smitten with her and didn’t care who knew it. His hands reached out to curl beneath her arms, drawing her up and out of your hold and into his, where she immediately tucked herself into like it was her favorite place in the world to be.

You understood completely — the cradle of Eddie’s arms, the feel of his chest beneath you at night everything you could have ever dreamed of.

She was your daughter, after all.

And had her father wrapped around her tiny little finger from the moment she entered the world.

“Although…” you trailed off, eyes roaming over Eddie’s form in the same costume he wore the night you met him. That mask tied around his head, the tight pants hugging his thighs, the tunic tucked into them, the leather boots and gloves. Heat simmered in your belly, and lower, the burning behind your eyes making Eddie’s jaw tick.

“There are young eyes and ears here,” Eddie warned, leather gloved hand curling around your waist to tug you in close, “need I remind you?”

He paused, kissing his daughter’s still semi-wobbly head as she shifted against him, nearly thumping against his cheek. “Later, sweetheart. You know how much I liked seeing that dress on the floor last time.”

He winked, and heat flooded your chest and cheeks, heart thrumming at the mere notion, disrupted by the insistent knocking at the front door.

——

Halloween looked a lot differently this year, you realized, walking beside Eddie as he pushed the baby’s stroller along the bumpy Hawkins streets.

Instead of parties with blaring music, you paused to give Elena a bottle while Steve and Chrissy helped Melody hobble up to house after house, coming back squealing every time with her spoils of trick-or-treating.

Instead of sipping drinks at a table with Eddie as he danced his way into your heart, he leaned over to draw you in for a kiss, clutched your hand in his, whispered he loved you every chance he got.

Different, and yet perfect, your heart light as Elena babbled from within her stroller, grinning up at her dad as Chrissy and Steve skipped back over as a little trio, the three of them dressed as Woody, Bo Peep, with Melody in a makeshift Slinky dog costume.

“‘Lena!” Melody squealed, practically climbing up Eddie’s thigh in order to look over at her tiniest best friend.

Eddie grunted, hoisting the little girl up onto his hip, blowing a raspberry into her cheek when she leaned down to hand a rattle toy to the currently cooing little one.

“Melody, ask Uncle Eddie please,” Chrissy admonished, pinching her brow. “Poor Uncle Eddie is going to run out of arms soon.”

“Huh?” you asked, pulling your eyes away from the very attractive sight of the man you loved with one (now bared, since he got warm) tattooed arm curled around your daughter’s stroller, and the other filled by a toddler.

Steve grinned. “In about seven months soon.”

“No way!” you shrieked, arms curling tight around Chrissy’s neck, wide smile pressed into her neck.

“Congratulations,” Eddie said, clapping his best friend on the shoulder.

So, yes — Halloween looked quite different this year. But different could also mean perfect, and standing there on that busy sidewalk, with your best friends, and the two loves of your life, you realized it was just that.

And later, after Elena had gone to sleep down the hall, Eddie made good on his promises to reenact the night you met — your dress discarded at the edge of the bed, where it remained as he showed you over and over and over again just how much he liked it.

——

#lunaloveseddie #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #dad!eddie munson #dad!eddie munson x mom!reader

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months ago

Note

AITA for telling the upstairs neighbor to be a little quieter at night?

I (26nb) live in an apartment complex. I am on the first floor. This apartment has a noise curfew of 10pm. I have a kid (5) who sleeps at 8pm. We have neighbors around us who also have kids around the same age who go to bed roughly around the same time (we've talked from time to time) including a new neighbor with a young autistic kid. My kid is also autistic. I am also autistic and schizophrenic. The neighbor directly next to us has a dog who tends to bark and howl whenever he hears loud noises. These are important to remember.

This girl moved in some handful of weeks ago right above me. Some days during the day I hear her stomping around REALLY loudly like crazy, and at first I thought that's fine because its just during the day no big deal. But then she started doing it late at night. First night I thought maybe she was still unboxing and stuff, nbd. But this kept going on for weeks from 8pm until nearly 2am every single day. And around 10pm-1am she would play loud music with heavy bass. This would keep me awake at night and prevent me from sleeping, and would cause me to have sensory overload very easily. My kiddo said it scared her to hear the banging and stomping and music upstairs late at night. One night at about 9:30pm, she started banging something FIERCE up there to the point where I actually started having an episode. I thought we were being broken into and I fell into a delusion that was remedied by my partner coming home and helping to ground me. That was my breaking point, and I ended up leaving a note saying, "hi! I wanted to ask if you could please keep the noise a little lower at night, we have young kiddos that live here too. Thank you!" I didn't leave anything to indicate who we were.

The next day she brought back the note to MY door saying "I'll try to be quieter. I didn't think I was that loud. I come home late. It was a Friday night and I was banging chicken at 8pm so I didn't think it was an issue. I just moved in and I'm trying to live my life. Sorry" and left two stuffed animals. Weeks passed and she is still, up to today, being loud late into the night and early morning. My partner can also hear it loud and clear and has complained to me about how disruptive she is. Some other neighbors have come forth saying she's so loud THEY can hear her when they come in through the main door. She's so loud that she's been causing the dog next door to bark like crazy, which is disturbing that poor neighbor as well. We are all kind of fed up with this girl.

Recently, there was a bunch of people who got their packages stolen... Her included. She left a note in the main lobby saying to bring her packages back. Today, we could hear her loudly talking on the phone outside while we were also outside, and she was talking to someone about available renting places outside of our city. We think she might be trying to move out already even though she just got here.

I think I might be the asshole because, between my note and her packages getting stolen, she probably felt unwelcomed here. I don't want people to feel unwelcomed, but I also want to be able to exist in my own home safely and comfortably. Maybe I should have left her alone and just dealt with the noise. My family thinks I was being rude to say anything at all, and my mom said I lost a potential friend by doing that. AITA?

#aita #am i the asshole

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filmbyjy · 1 year ago

Text

COLLIE DUTY

SYNOPSIS > being the new CEO to the ‘Sim Corp’ was hard and stressful. jake didn’t have much time to spend with layla and so he decides to get a dogsitter, you. though, you were originally already his secretary. how will dog sitting bring you two closer?

THIRTY - layla the puptress

WARNINGS: none :D just Layla being a good girl🥹

MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT

Why were you so nervous?

Your hands trembled as you scanned through the most appropriate outfit you could find to just ‘casually’ hang out with jake. Which was weird to say considering he is still your boss.

Oh god, he’s still your boss…This was so wrong!

Maybe it was because you two almost kissed which made you forget he was your boss. Either ways, this wasn’t right but Jake was expecting you so you had to go over. As per usual, you made your way past the community gate and parked right outside of Jake’s house. Mrs.Matilda wasn’t at the porch so you assumed she must be having her afternoon nap.

You could feel the way your hands were starting to sweat. The nerves getting to you the closer you stepped onto Jake’s porch. You clicked on the doorbell. You nearly winced at the loud (fancy high end) doorbell he had, like a complete horror movie kind.

The black haired boy opens the door, a cute smile adorning his face. As he was about to say something, Layla perches at your legs and tries to somehow climb at you. Which was impossible considering how big of a dog she was.

“Layla, (name) is our guest. We don’t climb our guests.” Jake warns the puppy. The small whimpers Layla gave out was obviously hurting Jake’s heart so he gives a small ruffle to her fur and turns to look at you.

“Sorry, she’s umm…really excited to see you.” He says as he scratches his nape in shyness/awkwardness.

“is Layla excited to see me or are you excited to see me?”

“umm…both? god, I’m sorry.” Jake groans.

you chuckled, “it’s fine. this is our first time actually hanging out causally. usually, I would be over to puppy-sit Layla.”

“oh, right. wanna order something to eat? unfortunately, as you know…from jay, that I have zero idea how to cook.”

“sure, why not.”

This was very awkward…

You were sure Layla could feel how awkward it was because she started getting a little rowdy. Just as you sat down, she jumps onto your lap and starts licking your face.

“Layla.” Jake warns her a little. The puppy doesn’t stop until you were smiling genuinely. Jake pats the empty spot beside him to get Layla to sit next to him but she doesn’t listen.

She only whimpers trying hard to get you to feel comfortable. Ah if only she understood how hard it was to act around your boss who you were pretty sure knew about your crush on him. Maybe she knows.

“I’m sorry about her, I have zero clue why she’s acting this way. She usually listens to me very well.” Jake apologises.

“it’s alright.” You held Layla close and hugged her. She calms down a little. Her heavy breathing dies down due to her excitement. “She’s just really good at reading emotions sometimes.”

Jake tilts his head. He didn’t understand what you meant but it’s fine. Maybe when the time comes. For now, he could only hope for you to actually notice him making a move.

Or was it too quick? Was he moving too fast? Oh god.

Jake was internally panicking. Why was he so nervous around you? You were his secretary for 4 years now, he shouldn’t feel scared or nervous. It’s not like you were going to bite him.

Just as jake opens his mouth to utter something, his phone rings. He looks at you apologetically and goes to answer the call. You were waiting for him. It took longer than you expected and so curiously got to the best of you.

“Dad, no. I am not marrying her. She’s not the woman I like. What? What do you mean, I have no choice? That doesn’t make any sense. Yeah, I am growing old but I want to find a woman I like to marry. Not be arranged to marry.”

You felt sad. Well not for yourself but for jake. Why is it that rich young people always have to be arranged for marriage. You couldn’t help but wonder. The way jake paced back and forth while on the call with his dad only led you to do one thing…

“baby?” you called out. Jake turns around in shock. “you were taking too long, even Layla was getting riled up.”

You looked down at Layla and she seemed to get the note. She whimpers a little at jake. Her tail drooping and wagging slowly. “You said you would take 5 minutes…it’s been almost 15 minutes. I was worried sick.” You jutted out your lower lips, giving Jake a small pout.

Jake was frozen, he couldn’t say a single word. All he heard was his dad blasting him questions and demanded answers. However, that went a complete blur since his brain sort of short circuited.

Did you just call him baby?

“Sim Jaeyun.” His dad on the call says in a stern voice. Jake finally gets back from his little moment. He felt his face heat up.

“yes, dad?”

“who was that?”

“umm.”

“don’t ‘umm’ me. was that a girl? or more specific, was that your girlfriend?”

“well…she’s umm…” Jake looks up at you. “yeah…”

“shes my girlfriend.”

a/n: OOOOOOOOOO THE SPICE🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻

taglist[open]: @svarcq @wooonkies @ajayke-reads @peachysunooooo @xiaoderrrr @viagumi @lunakua @bubblytaetae @aureliaxuuu @nikiluvr16 @sngvhs @watermelon-sugars-things @bldelaine @enhaz1 @yeoungie @heart4hees @mimimovv @enczen @enhastolemyheart @woon2u @kyanmeai @4townn @skzenhalove @s00buwu @ce1ight @markleepooh @sparklingsjy @rizzshimura @bluxjun @beomgyusonlywife @jyndre @blamemef0rit @fanfangying1304 @kwiwin @heart4hees @luxurystark-jackson @yunjardi @ioszzn @mrowwww @hyhees @25dejulho @neoculturewhat @wtfhyuck @dianzed @143lele @ajybeo @teddywonss @nyfwyeonjun @alwayswook @shinrjj @manooffline @heavenhannie @bmnyy17 @jayujus

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ctrl-alt-em · 4 months ago

Text

Communication is Key

AO3

Robin

I am Morven Hellwain. You have carried my spirit in your body for the last two months. As I am sure you have not figured out, when you lose consciousness, I gain control of our shared vessel. I need you to sleep as frequently as possible. Additionally, avoid bodily harm. I do not appreciate having to cast Cure Wounds when I wake.

Dear Morven Hellwain

Are you the reason for all the strange happenings? Did you explode the wolves? Lug says you killed that monster in the bunk house.

I go to sleep every night. I guess it is every other night? I don’t think I can sleep more than that and still help.

Thank you for healing my leg. Happen says he did not aim for me. His sprites played a mean prank.

From Robin Oatcake

Robin

I cannot fathom how you think you, the village idiot, can be of any help. The only way you can help is by ensuring I am in control as much of the time as possible.

As for your initial questions, yes, I am. I cannot imagine anything of note occurring in your proximity without my influence. I am not directly responsible for the wolves’ destruction; the recent unpredictable outcomes of spells is to blame. You need not concern yourself with magic.

Dear Morven Hellwain

I was not the village idiot. That was Young Man Dan. I was the spit-turner before I lost my job seven weeks ago.

I can be a great help! I helped save Lug from those men. I even injured one! And I was the one that got help when that man turned into a monster. Happen said I did a good job. I even helped us meet our friends and join our adventuring party. You are just upset that I can help just as much as you. I understand that. I was jealous of Tilly the spitturn dog too at first.

From Robin Oatcake

Robin

From the other's accounts of the confrontation with the mob, it does not sound like you played a needed role. It is no show of strength or skill to hit a blinded, maimed man with stale bread. As for the combat at Folkmoot, others surely would have heard and come to our aid, supposing I did not defeat the abomination before their arrival. You did nothing a dog would not be capable of. A dog likely would have been of greater help and less of liability.

Robin

You will get us both killed if you disregard my advice. Your 'help' is not needed nor wanted, I assure you.

To Morven Hellwain

I was thinking about back home, all the weird things people kept telling me. Leslie, the head cook, was cross with me. She said I missed work twice and that I insulted her in the market. I had no idea what she was talking about. I assumed she mistook me for someone else and I tried to tell her so. She said I was lying and fired me! It occurred to me that she might not have been lying. Was it you she saw? Are you the reason I lost my job?

From Robin Oatcake

Robin

Of all the things you could waste my time with, you chose this? Your 'job' is hardly worth the ink we are wasting writing about it. I will acknowledge that I was in control of our body several times before our departure. I did lose my patience with several of the dimwitted residents of the village so I very well may have offended the head 'cook'. I would not consider the loss of any great consequence. If anything, it is beneficial. Your 'occupation' would have delayed your departure for Folkmoot. You may thank me for my help in your next note. Hopefully, the writing will tire you.

To Morven

And what about my house? Did you tell the apothecary she could give it to her goat? If you wanted to run me out of my village so bad, you could have written to me earlier.

From Robin

Robin

If I recall correctly, and I do, the old hag asked me, "How I am supposed to keep a roof over my goat's head if you don't pay?" To that, I said, "Give the fucking goat my roof. I don't care." And I continue to not care. Your hovel was little more than a goat's shelter anyway.

I have spoken with Happen and he is aware of a root that induces a harmless sleep state. I have procured some. It is in the outer pouch of our bag.

To Morven

It is not our bag. It is my bag. And I don't need anything to help me sleep. A long day of traveling with my friends does that enough. Seeing as I have no work or home to return to, I will be with them for the foreseeable future regardless of our mission.

If you want to be helpful, Morven, you will tell me how to use magic myself and how I get you out of me.

From Robin

Robin

You cannot use magic. It would require innate talent or years of study, neither of which you have. Unless such fantasies lull you into a slumber, do not concern yourself with such endeavors.

I am looking into potential methods to separate us. However, until magic has been returned to its original state and I gather more information on what caused my spirit to enter your body in the first place, no significant progress can be made. You need not be involved.

To Morven

How can I not get involved when I already am? You’re in my head! You walk around in my body half the time! I should be the only one in my body!

And how do you know I don’t have inate innate talent? Maybe I just haven’t had need to use it.

From Robin

Robin

Knock yourself out as soon as you see this. Lug, Cressida, and Willowfine have been captured by a group of zealots and I need to go save their skins.

To Morven

No need to worry. Me and Happen did it ourselves. You should have seen how far Lug hit this one guy with his hammer once we got him out.

From Robin

Robin

That is not what I told you to do. You will get us both killed.

Willowfine said she saw you use magic. I can only assume you located a scroll and stumbled your way into using it correctly.

To Morven

You were wrong, Morven. I do have a talent for magic, no scroll needed, whatever those are. Mine is not as pretty or orderly as yours but I can cast spells. Cressida thinks that might be why you didn’t have trouble casting in my body.

You may thank me for my help in your next note. I will not ask you to knock yourself out because I have manners.

From Robin

Robin

I have spoken with Cressida and Willowfine regarding your spelling casting. As must I detest to acknowledge it, I suppose it makes sense. Either my spirit brought my magic potential with it or my spirit was attracted to your magic potential. I do believe the first one is the more likely of the two. It still stands that between the two of us, I am the more proficient and thus should handle any and all confrontations.

To Morven

Willowfine says we should try to come to a compromise. She said our attempts to screw with each other and limit the other’s time awake is annoying.

How about a deal? If I find myself in situations that I cannot handle, I will find a way to allow you to take control if you agree to cease trying to stay awake for days on end. If the group stops to sleep, you sleep and let me take control.

From Robin

Robin

After much strong arming from the others, I agree to your terms.

Robin

Why am I not surprised you have Wild Magic? Of all sorcerous origins, you draw power from the most unruly and unpredictable.

With that said, I request that you cast something that will offer you improved defense or evasion when in a confrontation. You cannot rely on Acid Splash only.

- Morven

#oxventure wyrdwood #oxventure #fanfic #robin oatcake #morven hellwain

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sapphim · 3 months ago

Text

Since everyone's been so nice about the other snippet I posted 👉👈 here are the good bits from sth else with the warden squad I wrote last year (since I might never get around to sprucing up the long and boring bits). Right after Lothering before anyone involved knows how to get along with each other so they're all kind of just standing around being assholes 🩷

—

"Not to catastrophize," Alistair says, to nobody in particular, "but when they find their way back and inform us with deep regret that they have no idea where we are or where we're going and we all die in the woods after wandering in circles for weeks, I'm going to say 'I told you so'."

"That's not going to happen."

Alistair twists around to gawk at Sten. The Qunari soldier has been standing at the outskirts of the group, stone-faced and completely unmoving—as far as Alistair can tell—since they paused their slow march through the woods.

"I think that's the first thing I've heard you say all day," he says incredulously. "Humor me. Why won't it?"

"Because in this scenario you've crafted in your mind, you'll be too dead to say 'I told you so'."

"They'll be my dying words," Alistair insists. "As I lay dying in the underbrush I'll croak, 'I told you this is exactly how it would happen, Sten,' and then I'll perish on the spot. See if I don't."

"I look forward to it," Sten says. "At least then you'll be quiet."

"It'll be a touching moment," Alistair says, settling back down into his seat at the base of a tree and staring up into the canopy, "and you'll miss me when I'm gone. You'll see."

"If it will make you feel any better," Zevran pipes up from his seat on low branch a short distance away, "if the end does come—which I very much doubt, mind, given what a capable group you have assembled here—I can swear that I will ensure you a swift and dignified death."

"Absolutely not," Alistair growls.

"My apologies," Zevran says mildly, as he has found himself doing not infrequently over the last few days since his initial ill-fated encounter with the wardens. "The offer was meant with no ill intent."

"Do not stab me."

—

"What's that?" Micah asks, pointing upward. Alistair and Rafael crane their heads to look at the rustling tree branch she's indicated.

"That, my dear, is another squirrel," Zevran says.

"Squirrel," she repeats under her breath.

"Don't have squirrels in Orzammar?" Alistair says, conversationally.

"We've got nugs," Micah says. "And moles. Mice. Deepstalkers. No squirrels."

"I guess everywhere has mice," Rafael muses.

"The one thing that unites us despite all our differences," Alistair agrees. "Mice in the larder. Hey, Sten, do Qunari have–"

"They're returning," Sten interrupts, nodding curtly in the direction of more rustling brush, where glimpses of Leliana's pale skin and vivid red hair can be caught through the trees.

The mabari crashes out of the underbrush first, panting and wiggling with an excess of excitement. A few moments later, the rest of the wayward scouts rejoin the waiting party.

"We have determined the proper course to reach our destination, and located a camp site for the night," Morrigan announces. "No need to thank us."

"And we saw the fattest squirrel I've ever seen in my life," Leliana adds cheerfully. The dog barks in agreement.

Morrigan sighs. "Yes. And—more importantly—a sight which has never before been witnessed by man nor beast. A fat squirrel. Again, no need to–"

—

"Could you tell if something is possessed by a spirit?" she asks.

The young mage twists the cuffs of his sleeves between his fingers, chewing on his lip. "I– I should be able to," he says. "Yes. I– Yes, I can do that."

"Spoken with remarkable confidence," Morrigan says dryly, earning her a reproachful glare from Alistair.

"Not all that many haunted trees in the middle of the lake, I'd think," he says.

"There was a cat, once," Rafael says, "that got possessed by a demon and went on a rampage through the tower. It killed three templars before they brought it down."

"Ah, 'tis a heartwarming tale that would bring a smile to anyone's face, would it not?"

The mabari huffs and snorts in response.

"Aw, I bet a nasty demon cat would be no match for you," Alistair says, crouching to scratch the pleased mabari vigorously behind the ears. "Isn't that right, Barkspawn? Because you're a good boy! Yes you are!"

"We weren't allowed to have cats in the tower after that," Rafael mutters in conclusion.

"Not allowed," Morrigan repeats derisively. "'Tis a wonder that anything would be allowed to begin with."

"For the mice," Rafael says glumly.

Alistair extricates himself with some effort from the wet, sloppy kisses the mabari is determined to plant all over his face. "Did you get demon mice after that?" he asks, with the gleeful tone of someone who has only just considered the possibility of demon mice and finds it funnier than they probably should.

—

As they fall into line behind the Dalish elf, Micah muses aloud to no one in particular, "So, I'm not entirely sure what a cat is."

Eydis snorts derisively. "It's a surface animal with four legs and a tail. I've been here as long as you have. How do you not know that?"

"Excuse me?" Micah snaps. "You just described every surface animal. They all have four legs and a tail. Or they're birds."

"It's got fur."

"They've all got fur. You're just describing the dog."

The dog in question barks.

"Smaller than the dog. And with a fluffy tail."

"That's squirrels."

"Bigger than squirrels," Eydis huffs. "They were all over the human settlements. Pay more attention next time, brand."

"Watch it, salroka," Micah growls.

"Perhaps I could draw some pictures tonight," Leliana says appeasingly.

"Perhaps you should write a song in memory of the princess, in case I finally kill her tonight."

"Don't be so sensitive," Eydis chastises.

"I've been lead to understand that we are all strictly forbidden from killing each other here," Zevran interrupts cheerfully, "or is that just me?"

"Do not stab me," Alistair repeats.

"I swear on my life," Zevran says, "I will make no attempt to harm you unless I am paid a great deal more coin and I have reason to understand that forsaking your company would be to my overall benefit. Neither of which I forsee happening in the middle of a haunted forest. Perhaps that may set your mind at ease?"

"That doesn't set my mind at ease! Why would that make me feel better?"

"Because I am being extremely honest right now," Zevran says. "Unless you would prefer I lie?"

"I would not."

"Nobody is killing anybody," Leliana says.

"Only a fool would do the work of his enemy for him," Sten says.

"Oh! That's very wise, Sten."

"It is not. It's common sense."

#oc blab #rafael #micah brosca #eydis aeducan #can't tag sulina she's not in ANY of the good bits lmao #sir not appearing in these excerpts

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backjustforberena · 2 months ago

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Ok, so this question may not be that specific and all but:

What do you think of Meleys's relationship with Seasmoke? Specifically, them at Driftmark?

Ooooh that's a good question. I'm sticking with show, and, I suppose, I'm guided by three things.

The first, and most important is the very brief interaction that they share in 1x5, where they arrive with the Velaryon ships. The first shots we ever have of our Red Queen.

The second, would be timeline facts - the idea that Seasmoke is, more than likely, a cradle egg, the idea that Seasmoke has known Meleys all his life and then after Laenor's "death", Seasmoke doesn't go to Dragonstone (where his "family" go and his most recent home) or to the Dragon Pit (where he spent the last ten years) but does, instead, remain on Driftmark. That suggests it's a safe place to be and it's allowed by Meleys who could have turned territorial.

And then third is just the general vibes we get from their personality. Going with the idea that a dragon is similar to their rider. Seeing them interact with other dragons in particular. So, for example, seeing Meleys flying alongside Vermax and Arrax.

With Meleys and Laenor, I hesitate to go fully with "mother and son". Dragons don't seem to be attached in that particular way, we have no knowledge of them actually being related in any way and a dragon has no predisposition to be maternal or attached. There's no expectation to be maternal.

I suppose the way I look at it is it's like introducing any new pet to an established pet. So you put a puppy with the dog. That relationship depends entirely on what those dogs bring to it, they're not instantly bonded and they're not driven by the age difference.

So, I don't think I view it as mother and son. I do, however, view it as teacher and student. Wise old master and young padawan. I think Meleys liked Seasmoke and was extremely tolerant of the young upstart, taking cues from her rider. I think Rhaenys would be as close to Seasmoke as anyone, helping to rear Seasmoke. And you have got the mirroring of Rhaenys teaching Laenor to ride and I imagine they'd take frequent rides together, especially when starting out, then that gives you something else to work with as well. A nice idea of a possible dynamic that would blossom.

The clip we have of them in 1x5, it's Meleys taking the lead with the divebomb and Seasmoke following with a sweep of his own so I would say there's a hierarchy there. There's leadership. There's also the idea of Meleys instructing Seasmoke or keeping him in line, with the exchange of noises they have.

The clip of Arrax and Vermax, leaving Dragonstone, you have Meleys taking up the rear, again, being patient with the speeds of younger dragons. She could have zipped off but both she (and you can debate how purposeful it was by Rhaenys and whether you can distinguish her actions and thoughts from her dragons) and Rhaenys stick around, leave with them yet also stay with them until it's time to diverge onto their different paths.

All of this to say is I imagine Meleys is as she is: regal, intelligent, mature. I don't think she's overly affectionate or invested in Seasmoke (she's happy enough with her own company) but she will be happy to see him, fly with him, teach him. She will guide him and welcome him. She would be a dragon that he could look up to and feel protected by.

#house of the dragon #Bad meta #<- tag is ironic now

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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year ago

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Request: steve having 4 rabbits (all male) as pets bc he loves them. They are super rambunctious aside from his last one which he recently adopted from a shelter. But HE SPOILS THEM??? He refers to them as his kids???? The party doesn't know what kids he is referring to until they see him with his babies. Thats all just pure flufff

First of all, title on AO3 is from Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter because Steve loved that story as a child and that was the inspiration behind most of this. Second of all, this is ridiculous and fun. It's so very unserious. I cannot stress enough how much this is just absolutely silly. As with any of the stuff I write, there's some emotions and discussions of Steve's shitty childhood, but the rest is just some hilarity between Steve, Eddie, and Robin with a guest appearance of the party. - Mickala ❤️

---------------------------------------------------------------

Steve’s parents had never bothered with a pet, had never even thought about the fact that most kids got to have a dog or a cat or a turtle when they were young.

They didn’t think about how much Steve needed a companion of some kind.

It didn’t stop him from always playing with his friends’ pets, or stopping at the pet store after work sometimes to show some love to the ferrets nobody seemed to want. He volunteered at the animal shelter when he had time, always getting too attached to the dogs coming and going.

When he moved into a house with Eddie and Robin, they all agreed he could and should get a pet, as long as they could all agree on what it was beforehand.

The problem was, he knew he didn’t have time to commit to a dog, not with how often he was working and taking the kids where they needed to go and helping Eddie with his band. He knew Robin wouldn’t admit it, but being around cats for more than a few minutes left her stuffed up and teary-eyed. He didn’t really want fish, or anything that he couldn’t hold or cuddle with. Birds were out because they were loud and on his migraine days, even the tiniest hint of sound would make him nauseous.

He’d never even considered rabbits.

But on his way home from work on his birthday of all days, he passed a truck with a cage full of bunnies in the back.

He pulled over, not thinking about what he was doing, just knowing that he wanted to hold one.

Robin, who was in one psychology course at the community college, called it healing his inner child.

Eddie, who liked to get on Robin’s nerves as frequently as possible, called it being his inner child.

Steve, who loved them both very much, thought they were maybe both right.

“Can I hold one?” Steve asked the older woman who was sitting on the tailgate of her truck.

“Sure. You have any rabbits?” she asked as she grabbed one from the cage.

“No ma’am.”

“Lovely pets. Unfortunately, we didn’t know one of ours was a male and now we have about 22 of these suckers to get rid of. You got room for one?” she watched him carefully as he held the baby rabbit to his chest.

All of the rabbits were gray except for four, which were an off-white color with speckles of brown. Steve didn’t know how genetics worked, especially not for rabbits, but he knew they were unique.

“I got room for four.”

He didn’t.

Not really.

But he would make room.

The woman only charged him for two, said he was doing her a favor by taking four anyway. She gave him a bag full of some food pellets, but told him they would probably still prefer to get lettuce and other vegetables often.

“I guess I should think of some names,” Steve said out loud on the way home. “I should probably also warn you that I didn’t talk to Robin and your other dad about this yet. But they won’t mind. I can build you guys a home in the backyard! And during the winter, you can stay in the shed.”

He had it all planned out in his mind, and nothing would ruin it.

—------------

“How many?!” Robin exclaimed.

“Rabbits?” Eddie asked, surprised, but not quite as shocked as Robin.

“It’s four males. They’re still babies, but they grow quick. They’re pretty low maintenance, and they can live outside so you won’t have to worry about allergies or noise or anything. And they can eat a lot of vegetables and some fruit so I won’t have to spend tons of money on special food.”

Eddie cupped his cheek in his palm and smiled.

“You don’t have to defend your choice to us, sweetheart. If you’re happy, I’m happy,” he kissed him on the lips quickly before pulling away and giving Robin a look that said she better agree.

“I’m happy you found pets?” Robin said, still clearly unsure about it, but giving a genuine smile.

“Okay, now names!”

It only took five minutes for Eddie to excuse himself from that conversation to start working on their enclosure.

“Steve, you cannot name a rabbit Edward.”

“There are no rules when it comes to naming rabbits. If I want to name the one who doesn’t stand still after my boyfriend, then I will!”

It went on like that for nearly an hour as Steve took turns holding each of the rabbits, keeping them close to his chest and petting them, giving them all a little kiss on the head before he put them back in the box they were temporarily in.

Eddie came in not long after they finally settled on names, giving Steve a kiss on the cheek and grabbing a glass of water.

“So? What are their names?”

Steve picked them up one by one, showing them off as he spoke.

“This one is Marty, and this one is Hobbit, and this one is Bard, and this tiny little guy is Pierre. Robin insisted on it because the speckle on his face looks like a mustache and goatee.”

“I hate to say it, Stevie, but I don’t think I’m the father,” Eddie teased as he rubbed Pierre’s head.

Steve gently pushed Eddie’s chest, but smirked at him.

“Despite your best efforts, I don’t think actual children will be biologically possible for us,” he said as he put Pierre back in the box and picked the entire thing up. “Now, show me their home!”

—----------------

Steve was a natural caregiver, had always been one even when he was alone.

Everyone knew it, everyone loved it about him.

But no one had expected him to treat his new pets as his actual children, not even Eddie.

He knitted them sweaters.

“They have fur already, Steve,” Robin said.

“But they’re so cute in them!”

Robin and Eddie shared a glance as Steve handfed them some lettuce.

—----------------

No one expected him to also come home with a fifth one right before Christmas.

He was holding it against his chest, under his jacket, whispering to it.

“Stevie? Whatcha got?”

“Don’t be mad. He was dropped off at the shelter with a few puppies and they said that they couldn’t keep him. I couldn’t-” Steve’s sharp intake of breath made Eddie drop what he was doing and get closer. “We have room or I can make room. He’ll fit right in! I think he looks like a Frodo, don’t you?”

Steve unzipped his jacket and a completely white rabbit shuffled around so it’s head was nestled further in his shirt.

“Sure, Stevie. Hi Frodo, welcome to our home. Rent’s due on the first, lettuce is available for free, and bath days are every other Saturday,” Eddie said quietly as he petted the rabbit’s back.

—---------------------

The first time the kids held the rabbits, Steve hovered like a worried parent.

“Just relax, love. They’re being careful,” Eddie whispered in his ear.

“I know. I just don’t want one to get loose and end up hurt or stuck somewhere,” Steve said, keeping his eyes on a constant rotation between all five rabbits.

“Can we feed them?” El asked with a beaming smile.

“Yeah, please!” Will said excitedly.

“Sure. But everyone only gets to pick one thing so they don’t overeat and get sick,” Steve agreed.

Eddie watched as Steve continued to hover, physically biting back comments about the way the kids were feeding them.

Eddie could sense his anxiety getting to a boiling point, knew he would probably explode in a minute if he didn’t intervene.

“Alright kids! Time for us to put the rabbits up for the night. They like to cuddle before they sleep,” Eddie said, reaching for the closest one to him, Bard.

They slowly put them all back into their enclosure, and Steve stood outside of it for a moment making sure they were all okay.

They were still a bit over excited from being out of the cage, all except Frodo, who had never been excited about anything.

“I’ll take the kids home,” Eddie said as he kissed Steve’s shoulder. “Staying out here for a bit?”

“Yeah, just until they calm down a little. Tell the kids I’ll see them tomorrow.”

Eddie nodded once and made his way back inside.

“Steve isn’t coming?” Max asked.

“Nah, he’s making sure the little ones behave. Everyone ready?”

The kids looked at each other, then back at Eddie.

“He’s making sure the rabbits behave? What are they gonna do, steal a carrot from the fridge?” Mike asked.

“Tone, Wheeler,” Eddie reprimanded. “And everyone leaves Steve alone about this, got it? He’s being his inner child.”

“Healing his inner child,” Robin said from the couch, focused on her word search.

“Right, that’s what I said,” Eddie clapped his hands. “Kids in the van or you have to scoop the rabbit poop!”

A chorus of “ew, gross!” rang out as the kids scrambled to run out the front door and to his van.

“Can you make sure he comes in in a few minutes?” Eddie asked Robin. “He doesn’t have a jacket on.”

“Are you his boyfriend or his mom?” Robin asked, still not looking up from her word search.

“I’m gonna be your problem if he gets sick from sitting out there in the cold too long.”

“Fine,” Robin rolled her eyes. “But if he makes me bottle feed Hobbit again because he ‘won’t eat the pellets and he has to eat something’ I am locking him out there to become one of them.”

“Fine.”

Eddie glanced out the window of the back door, smiling to himself as he watched Steve talking to the rabbits, like he did every night.

Whatever they called it, Eddie was just glad Steve was getting something he’d always wanted.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #ficlet #request #fluff #kind of a crack fic tbh #this is just fun and silly #i needed some fun and silly today

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zombiee-reviews · 3 months ago

Text

Ronja Character Discussion / Breakdown

• The Damsel • The Unfit Leader • The Clueless

Y’ALL HAVE BEEN PATIENT, SO HERE IT IS FINALLY!

- What we will be going over

• Her early history.

• Read along breakdown / discussion of her character in the comic.

• Why she is clearly unfit / clueless af running MT.

• Early History

From what we know about Ronja, she was born in Kiques first comic, Asmundr. She was born around the time Kainan finally rescued Lifa and returned to Asmundr, only to find out the territory has been claimed by strangers. A pack, sort of similar to MT in their way of thinking and beliefs.

Ronja is born to an old female named Zita, presumably the result of a possible unwilling pregnancy, but who knows. Ronja is also the niece of Raela.

It is also interesting how Ronja looks nothing like she does in Home, picture(s) for examples:

Even though Ronja now has an interesting coat color, she did look better in Asmundr. Only reason I say this is because, judging from how Raela looks, I’m sure her brother ( Ronja’s father ) looked the same. Kique seemed to have a better understanding on how genes worked, back then at least lol. Otherwise, can someone explain to me how you get a rip off ridgeback dog from a dark wolf ( Zita ) and a dog similar to Raela?

Continuing.. Kainan managed to kill the leader of the pack and free Ronja and her mother. Zita died shortly after their rescue and Johaan ended up adopting Ronja as his own.

In Asmundr, Ronja is shown as a childish pup, of course. She is still rather young and learning her environment, under Johaan. In my opinion, Ronja seemed more promising in Asmundr and had more personality than the yes man she is now. She was even more willing to hunt for christs sake, instead of hide behind walls and feed off a dying herd.

Then came the time the war of the shield wolf broke out, I wouldn’t say Ronja was useless, but more young and inexperienced when it came to dealing with Ranulfr and trying to cut his ankles. I mean hell, it was pretty brave of her to offer herself to help out with Ranulfr and the shield wolves.

Unfortunately Ronja stumbled on cutting Ranulfrs ankles and managed to get grabbed by Ranulfr. In early home, the scar was still seen on Ronja, but eventually Kique got lazy with details and removed everyone’s scars they once had.

Then Ronja was tasked with watching Raela and staying behind with her, while everyone else went out to fight. Eventually, a shield wolf spots Ronja and Raela and Ronja quickly reaches for her weapon. And in a very non-dramatic, rushed as hell fight scene, Ronja managed to kill the shield wolf.

And that about sums up all I have to say about “Asmundr” Ronja! Imo Ronja was very promising in the first book, but in Home she has unfortunately become a slave / yes man to the god awful RxR couple…

• Read along breakdown

So now we will continue with “Home” Ronja.

Ahem, we’re not even through the first chapter and already Kique is trying to throw a potential ship in our direction. It’s obvious that Ronja has a fling for Roamer, considering he’s the only one that she is not related too. Still, Kique sums it up to Ronja not having enough “options”. Okay, weird. Roamer should have been treated like a cousin, not a suitor for Ronja. ( Page 8)

Skipping ahead, I would just like to note.. It is nice to see Ronja retain some of her personality that is established in the beginning. When Ronja watches Ferah murder an MT dog right in front of her, she is bewildered that someone would do this over a hare. ( Page 34 - 35 )

Again, suddenly Ronja is a love sick teenager over Roamer. When Roamer decides he wants to stay with Kargo and Ferah she suddenly turns into this jealous fool, that immediately goes on the defense, throwing out her last words and then walking away. ( Page 55 )

Now, here comes the part where Ronja becomes full fledged idiot! She runs into Ranach, while crying her eyes out over someone that should have been treated like a cousin? She literally helped RAISE Roamer? I also don’t know why she feels the need to approach a stranger like that and not be the least bit of cautious? Or scope him out before making an appearance.. But anyway. Ranach works his charm on her, course it works. Ranach offers to meet up with her again and she’s already giving him a time and date! Damn girl you move fast! You didn’t even stop and ask yourself if this dude was truly safe to be around lmao. ( Page 58 - 61 )

I think about 2 days after Ronja and Ranach met, she’s already horn dogging with Ranach. Talk about rebounding, am I right lol. ( thankfully she does admit to this later, but still, ew lol. ) Ranach then gives her an ultimatum, to join his tribe - or never see him again. Back then, one would think she would deny this, because she doesn’t know who tf he is buuut… ( Page 83 )

Without any hesitation, Ronja it seems like agrees to join MT, hell we’re not even given a scene where she talks to her family about it. We’re just shot over to a scene of her and Ranach standing outside the walls. I guess we’re forced to assume she wanted to join MT? It would have been nice to see her speak to her family and the Asmundr pack fighting her on it, or even a lick of hesitation on Ronjas part. Ronja just mindlessly joins a tribe with a male she hardly knows, which is incredibly idiotic, considering she’s in a world she knows NOTHING about. She should have also paid attention to that “Unfortunately” Ranach said, when she asked if something was wrong. Why would nothing being wrong be unfortunate? Hm.. But I guess d*ck was the only thing on her mind. SIGH. Anyway, Ranach manipulates her and tells her that he fears she’ll find someone better. Ok buddy, you know that’s BS. Ronja doesnt have the slightest clue she’s being used and is being too overly trusting. Of course she ends up mating with Ranach, cause fuck Roamer right? THAT’LL SHOW HIM lmao. ( Page 88 - 89 )

Of course, Ronja waltzed right into the trap, immediately breaking her trust in Ranach right? WRONG! Then she is dragged to the Jarls den, basically preparing to get r*ped without her knowledge on it. God this story arc is already going to hell.. ANYWAY. Thankfully, she is saved in the nick of time because Arenak was poisoned by Rogio, at Ranach’s request. Then somehow, without asking ANY questions, or fighting Ranach on what tf just happened, she goes in for a comforting hug because she’s “confused and scared” ok, but why aren’t you more irate? Why aren’t you questioning Ranach on where he brought you?? Why are you HUGGING HIM? ( Page 99 - 102 )

Adding on to the next page, why is Ronja still sticking around? What she just endured and witnessed I would think be traumatic AF to her. And yet, she’s sitting there like NOTHING just happened. ( Page 103 )

Then she is seen later that night sleeping in Ranachs bed, still not making a peep about what she just endured. Granted, it could be argued that she is traumatized beyond belief, but nothing shows this. She hasn’t questioned anything yet, she hasn’t even tried to put a fight / argument about anything. Ranach then tried to consult her, but she just ends up walking away and sleeping in a corner. GIRL LEAVE? It is obvious she is UNCOMFORTABLE! ( Page 107 )

Ranach then bestows the title of Viscountess to Ronja.. Again, nothing from Ronja. She didn’t even question Ranach on how much responsibility is on her shoulders or what the actual hell is going on.. She still hasn’t shown any emotion / trauma from anything she has just endured with MT. Hell she hardly knows ANYTHING about MT why is she just accepting this? Why would she want to lead in a place that confused and scared her? DUNNO MAN. Poor thing is a plot slave at the moment to Kique. ( Page 110 )

I am unsure why Ronja is waiting to get the word about Roamer, for her to be able to leave MT. She tells Jonna that she was too embarrassed to leave, but considering how much she saw and went through, one would think she would high tail outta there at a moments notice. It’s not like Ranach is really holding her down, like Arenak would have. Then she says she really wants this to work. GIRL WHAT. What exactly do you want to work? Did Ronja really not factor in what happened to her upon her arrival to MT, STILL? ( Page 133 )

Even though Jonna was a decent character by Home standards, her behavior is a strange one to endure for Ronja. Ronja talks about leaving, but for some damn reason hasn’t yet and Jonna basically tells her she isn’t going anywhere. ( Page 153 )

All of a sudden, Ronja grew some big ol golf balls when she confronts Ferah. Ronja went from hating MT, wanting to leave it, to suddenly puffing out her chest and telling Ferah she rules the tribe together with Ranach. But I thought you wanted to leave? You are also extremely uncomfortable in MT, so why are you acting all high and mighty here? Now I’m confused. Anyway, Ronja doesn’t seem to ask a whole lot of questions about Roamer, aside from asking if Ferah killed him. And that was about it. So I guess Ronja actually doesn’t give a shit about Roamer, cause she sure doesn’t seem like she does in this scene lol. Also Ronja is still clueless AF, saying that Ranach cares about her. Girl, if he cared he wouldn’t have brought you there in the first place. She never even factors that clue in! But honestly, this whole time Ronja has been ignoring every red flag that is MT, so not surprised really. Also, why isn’t Ronja looking further into why Ferah is being held hostage in a cave? ( Page 156 - 158 )

Looking deeper into the beginning times of Ronja’s “leadership” it really confuses me. Because how is it she goes from being traumatized, not questioning anything, just accepting whatever Ranach says, even talking about leaving to suddenly acting like a mini Ranach, when it comes to the second rebellion. Why is Ronja not asking ANY QUESTIONS in this point of time? She just suddenly took on the role of viscountess ( which she wanted to be short lived apparently ) and is suddenly against Kargo and Ferah and not asking why Ranach is hunting them down? She wanted to leave MT herself, so why is she alerting the guards? Hell, she could have joined them? Maybe even ASK QUESTIONS to Ferah and Kargo where Roamer is / was? It’s kind of funny how she’s trying to kill the only two dogs that know where Roamer is lol. ( Page 173 )

Quickly we are blessed with a scene where Ronja ALL OF A SUDDEN wants to know everything about MT. Well that was a quick 180 and I’m not even sure what changed her mind from leaving there. ( Page 183 )

Right here, Ranach pretty much opened the door for Ronja to leave, but yet she decides to stay anyway. Again, this whole plot line to this point, is very poorly written. Ronja was thrown into MT’s arms and not in a very good way.. She just basically accepted whatever was thrown at her, with no reaction / questions to anything. She is brainless to Kiques decision making with the plot. ( Page 193 )

Little bit of world building as we get a grand poetry about the Matriach from Axi. Ronja handles herself well and is at least honest from the get go of where she comes from. It’s also interesting that Ronja doesn’t ask if she has potentially seen a dog named Roamer, since that’s pretty much the only dog that’s had her attention this whole time. ( Page 194 - 196 )

Going forwards, we see Ronja sitting upon a rock, gathering the tribe around. She announces the game changing rules for the Tribe, under her reign. Unavoidably, some members are opposed to her rules, but she sets some ground work and goes from that point. Axi was kind enough to attend, casting Ronja a smile before leaving. Ronja shares the smile, but quickly retracts it when Axi is no longer looking. Assuming that maybe Ronja isn’t so confident for this after all. ( Page 233 - 234 )

It’s kind of weird how Fuss jumps around a lot, at first. Why didn’t he confront Ulfr before Ronja came up to him, to talk to him? He was obviously against everything Ulfr stood for. Idk just weird. I don’t really have much to say about this scene, minus that Ronja is obviously too timid and naive to deal with the tribe as a LEADER at this time, nonetheless. I mean hell, she’s basically giving females their freedom / rights around a bunch of unwilling to change rapists lol. There is going to be a lot of drama involved. ( Page 263 - 267 )

I suppose this scene shows that Ronja can in fact handle MT. Though, prior, she didn’t really have a reason or drive to stay and change sh*t around in MT, until Ranach basically passed off leadership. I mean hell, she DESPISED MT. Anyway. Ranach reveals to Ronja that she is pregnant and then Vigr suddenly decides AFTER KNOWING THIS WHOLE TIME, to spill the beans to Ronja about Zilas. Although tbh, I don’t know how Vigr even got that information, or even put two and two together that Zilas and Ronja were even “friends.” Ahem. Ronja suddenly grows baseballs and threatens Ranach, even though later comic she is a hopeless push over that wishes no harm on anyone! ( I suppose this was an out of character thing of her to say to Ranach. ) Of course, Ronja never asks anyone why they kept that info about Zilas away from her. ( Page 295 - 297 )

All of a sudden, freaking Ronja wants to see her family, though she had many chances before to LEAVE. Well guess what! Ya can’t do that now because you decided you wanted to help lead a tribe that wasn’t even your responsibility to begin with! So! Planning family trips won’t be so easy! Aside from that, Ulfr and Ranach are basically waiting for her to come out anyway. ( Page 309 )

Here we have Jonna asking Ronja a very solid question. Why in the hell DID she mate with Ranach? Ronja’s answer is that she was basically acting like a jealous fool over Roamer, even though she basically helped raise Roamer and turned into a cougar over him. F*cking weird, but anyway- This gives her the justification as to why she did what she did. She just brainlessly left with Ranach without questioning anything. And this is how women in real life die :). ( Page 318 - 319 )

Finally Roamer and jackass Rogio arrive in MT. Roamer is worried that Ronja wouldn’t want to see him, but Ronja quickly rushes to Roamer and hugs him. Roamer then discovers that Ronja is pregnant, his facial expression here looks more disgusted than surprised / shocked, not quite sure why? Ronja then asks Roamer to stay with her and here is where the clown show begins!

Real quick though, wtf is that anatomy?? I pulled every disk in my lower back just looking at Ronja here lmfao. ( Page 349 - 351 )

One thing that bothered me about Meteor was how different the territory became. When we are first shown what Meteor tribe looked like, the tribe was in an actual crater. Here, we can kinda see that idea was scrapped and now it’s just a regular area that has a fence around it. But anyway.. ( Page 353 )

Why tf is Rogio asking Ronja this question? “Ronja is the leader of this ever expanding group, correct?” No shit idiot, you were there when she got coronated??? Don’t you remember casting a jealous gaze over to her and bitching at Ranach about it? Oh! Guess not. ( Page 353 - 354 )

Anyway, here comes the part where Ronja suddenly shows favoritism / friendship for Rogio. I mean hell, I understand her being grateful for Rogio helping Roamer, but to literally let him basically do whatever he wants when no other tribe member is looking is KINDA overstepping the grateful-ness?? Then without Ronja fully assessing Rogio, she decides to brainlessly offer him the Baron rank. She should have taken into consideration how he took over the Baron rank previously. Obviously Rogio just wants power, he doesn’t care to actually do the work with that power. Not only this, but Ronja needs to think about her tribe and who should be her second hand. This rank should take some time to THINK about, not just throwing it at the first body she sees. ( Page 363 - 365 )

I know that I’ve said this before in Rogio’s breakdown, but it still annoys me that Ronja says “And Rogio deserves someone like you, after everything he’s been through.” GIRL you don’t know shit about him! Just because someone apologizes to you on how they acted before, doesn’t just magically fix everything. I get why Ronja would want to give Roamer the Baron rank, but you ever heard the saying you don’t mix your family with business? Well clearly she didn’t get the memo lol. Roamer is not qualified for the Baron rank either and plus, none of the tribe members know him nor even got to know him yet and they’re suddenly suppose to listen to what Roamer says? ( Page 393 - 394 )

I also don’t know why nobody told Ronja that the Novas needed to be moved pastures, I know that at least SOMEONE knows, why does it wait until Rogio says something? So sure, all the blame can’t really be put on Ronja because she didn’t know that the Novas needed to be moved and she is still fairly new on how things run in MT. ( Page 403 - 404 )

So Ronja gave this prodigal speech a few pages back, where she would sit on the back of her nova and lead them into battle. Sure this isn’t a battle, but why isn’t Ronja being that “strong, brave, courageous leader” that we’re SUPPOSE to see? She should definitely go into the woods with her tribe members and help sort the mess out that SHE created with Ranach and Ulfr, but no, she won’t do that. ( Page 406 )

Then comes Rogio’s fake ass panic attack and Ronja asks him what happened. Rogio tells her and she ends up agreeing with them, that she won’t use Rogio as bait for Ranach. Then she chases down Vigr, then agreeing with HIS plan, suggesting they use Rogio’s scent instead. ( funny, because this was never done. ) I’m going to assume that Kique wanted Ranach to find out about Rogio at this point in time, but decided nah, imma drag this story out further. ( Page 416 - 417 )

Again, Ronja decides to sit on her ass and let her tribe deal with the mess SHE caused. ( Page 421 )

I also don’t know why Ronja is letting her two barons borderline f*ck in front of everyone. That would be high key embarrassing lol. ( Page 495 )

I also think it’s funny how Ronja can thank Rogio for helping Roamer, but screw Ferah and Kargo! Not a single thank you, or any other question for them! ( Page 498 - 499 )

Idk why Kique always makes his characters hide / lie about shit, Ronja included. Sure it’s hard for her to throw Ferah and Kargo out, because of what they have done for Roamer. But she needs to put her tribe first, knowing that Kargo is a wanted man will put her tribe first on the chopping block, with SolarStag. All SolarStag knows is that MT is harboring a fugitive, so that gives them validation to break down the walls and kill if they wanted. But as usual, Ronja has to talk to someone about her decisions, because god forbid she makes one on her own lol. ( Page 507 )

Okay so why the hell is Ronja not doing anything? Kargo just went ape shit and beat the hell out of Rogio, though it was highly justified lol. Ronja doesn’t ask anyone what happened, she just stares at Roamer and Kargo and then turns around and leaves two panels later. NOTHING! You’d think as a LEADER she would be wanting to know why the hell Kargo just attacked her tribe member? Especially after given the reason why he returned?! Gonna assume that she thought Roamer could handle it, but still, you have drama going on in your tribe that you’re aware of. Why not at least ASK what’s going on? Do your own investigation?? At this rate, Ronja is just dumb as bricks. She never asks or questions anything. ( Page 524 )

So instead of putting responsibilities first, Ronja thinks it’s a great idea to throw a party, instead of figuring out why they may starve soon, or keep eyes outside the walls for Ranach. Basically what I got from this scene was, hey guys! Let’s celebrate starving to death with a maniac outside the walls! Idiotic! And look where that got her! Ranach ends up attacking the walls! Then Ronja spews out the most idiotic sentence in this entire comic. “Rogio you are the strongest here next to Kargo, go protect the cave entrance!” GIRL WHAT?? If you feel that Rogio is the strongest alongside Kargo, why aren’t you sending his dusty, crusty self out there with them to attack Ranach?? I STILL can’t get over that line lol. ( Page 539 - 542 )

Ronja then has her pups and we all already know who is Kiques favorite lol. Anyway, I hate that Ronja acts like she gives a shit about Zilas, mentioning how Naeva reminds her of Zilas, girl shut up lol. And another thing, she gives them nicknames but I have never once heard her use them. And why isn’t she keeping the pups close to her body? Already she’s a clueless af mother lol. It’s also kind of funny how we get this random af time skip and Ronja is like OK! GET OUTTA MY HOUSE! She doesn’t even bother to go show them HERSELF the rest of the territory lol. Or seizing the opportunity to spend quality time with her kids. ( Page 557 - 559 )

One thing that bothers me, is Ronja hardly knows Rogio on screen. She DOES know that he was part of MT’s rapist days, so what makes her think he’s changed and won’t try to go after her while they’re alone? Nah buddy, it’s cool, take me to the meeting spot ALONE. Besides, Rogio has shown how unwell he is, is it really a great idea to take an unwell member with you? Hell if I know anymore. ( Page 571 )

Skipping ahead to Tinget, I don’t know how Ronja managed to be late for the meeting here. I would say that this goes in her “unfit leader” folder, tbh. Even though Ronja is shown to be nervous and timid, she does actually end up standing up for herself in the meeting, after everyone throws what they can at her. I have to say, she handled this pretty well, under Kiques writing, lol. Cant forget, that she also got to re-unite with Jahla and her new lover boy. But first, she is able to hold a conversation with Fraujar. Fraujar is understandably concerned, since he lives so close to MT. Ronja is able to shake some doubts. After this, she then meets Fjordor, telling him that Kargo died. Fjordor then extends an alliance deal to Ronja and she accepts it. Jahla then re-unites with Rome and they share a boring conversation. ( Page 617 - 630 )

Skipping ahead to another judicial moment, where Fraujar brings Keirr back to MT. This was Ronja’s face exactly:

So they’ve been apart, at least 100 or so days, not even knowing whether Keirr was alive or not. And her face is so expression-less and bland, it’s super hard to enjoy or even put yourself into the scene. Probably the WORST reunion known to comic history, here. ( Page 645 )

Skipping ahead, because I might as well crush all the previous Ronja scenes into this one paragraph. We’ve obviously been thrusted into a Ronja x Fraujar ship and I must say, the build up was lame. Even though.. In Kique standards, it was better laid out than how he handled RxR. But really dude? ANOTHER relationship? It’s only a matter of time before he figures out what he wants to do with Keirr, what, with him being the only single one now. I mean hell, he even tried to push Raun onto him at one point. It’s sickening really, not everyone needs someone. Kique could have made Ronja an epic, independent, single mother character and I personally would have killed for that. But no, instead we get a frail, can’t make any decisions, co-depending character like Ronja. Ahem, anyway. Fraujar here states he wants to get to know Ronja more, if Ronja was actually the badass I WISH she was, she would have told Fraujar no. Simply because her tribe comes first, she doesn’t have time for a relationship. Especially considering the fact that she put MT on a hot list, during Tinget. But what do I know about story telling?! Might as well hurry up and merge Whispervale with Meteor and just save us the next 200 pages that are coming about that! ( Page 735 - 737 )

Ok, I get it, Kargo was resurrected. But I feel that Ronja shouldn’t seem so… Happy? Maybe shocked? She should say something else like, “Roamer.. You won’t believe this..” instead of just “Roamer!” With her stupid looking face LMAO. And then the introduction of Diarko? This is another mouth she has to feed? Which speaking of, whatever happened to her issue with the herd? What even HAPPENED to her herd? I know that Fraujar brings them food and what not, but what is she now? A moocher? Is she even giving Fraujar anything in return that’s not booty? IDK. Feels a bit unfair to have an entire other tribe take care of yours and you AS THE LEADER don’t try to help them back out, or find differing ways to help your situation. ( Page 740 - 742 )

Even though Ronja is suspicious, she just willingly said she’ll put her tribe / pups at risk for protecting Kargo FROM THE CAPITAL. Then of course she just trusts whatever Rogio says, again not making a self coherent thought / decision for herself. ( Page 747 - 748 )

Now this whole scene was just dumb. Why does Ronja have to approach Roamer, like he is the leader and announce that some members are leaving? It would have been better for Kargo and Roamer to stumble across them as Ronja tries to sort things out. But as a leader, why tf are you going outta your way to cut the conversation you’re having, sprint away and tell your SECOND IN COMMAND, that tribe members are leaving? God she is so helpless. And honestly I’m surprised Vigr is still in existence here, this is the same dog that literally held her down to be r*ped. Adding to this, Ronja hasn’t done shit, aside from rely on Fraujar to feed her tribe. ( 762 - 763 )

I think my biggest gripe about this scene, is how Axi is acting. One thing I have noticed about how Kique writes her, is she is always extremely suspicious and like she subtly knows what’s going on. Why is that? Why is she looking around all suspiciously, like she KNOWS Kargo is around. Is she a damn mind reader? I understand writing a suspicious character to be.. Well, suspicious, but she acts like she knows what’s going on, but is playing dumb. But, adding to Ronja’s case, here she is actively lying about Kargo and further digging her tribe into a hole. ( Page 769 - 770 )

Here we have a crucial role in Ronja’s leadership but in typical fashion Ronja doesn’t do SHIT. Her Tribe is under attack and she gives a direct order to Roamer to NOT hurt anyone, but make them leave. So what does Roamer do? Goes against her word and KILL the dog he was ordered to not kill! And what does Ronja do about it? NOTHING! That’s right! Still to this day, Roamer does not suffer any consequences from this! So now Ronja has an unhinged as hell Baron and she doesn’t do anything about it! ( Page 802 - 805 )

Another crucial part, where she renames and relocates her tribe. Guess what happens! She doesn’t decide either of these! Yup! She doesn’t come up with the name, or where the new territory is! Kargo, Roamer and Rogio all make that decision! This is just proof that that Rogio and Roamer run the joint, Ronja is a measly side kick at this point, even though she is the leader. ( Page 831 - 832 )

In conclusion

I’ve decided to cut off to this point, because I feel like I have stated enough about Ronja.

Ronja is a simple minded, unfit leader with unused potential. Kique missed a mega fat opportunity with Ronja. He could have shut us all up by making her a head strong, single mother that leads her tribe with pride and confidence. Instead, she is a watered down pathetic, plot slave to Rogio and Roamer.

She is extremely unfit because she relies on everyone to do her decision making. Hell, she has another tribe feeding her! I haven’t once seen a confirmation that they’re using their own herd yet!

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