#i was thinking of buying them a nice weekend somewhere since they love that but don’t money to go often | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

punkscowardschampions · 10 months ago

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Sylke final & Slaggie & Sick Kids

Sylvie: [me like hmm, how are we cockblocking y’all, might have your parents drive past you and see you running with your school bag on a weekend no less, like, hello? and thus you gotta go with them because you’re clearly up to something suspect lol, so give her longer than it would take her to show up clearly and no response/no show]

Jake: What happened to you?

Sylvie: I’m sorry, my damn parents saw me

Jake: What did you say?

Sylvie: I’m not saying anything, I am mortified at their attempts to be nice about all this

Jake: Should I come over and talk to them?

Sylvie: And tell them what? We were going to leave the country

Jake: I don’t know, enough truth they’re satisfied with it without outing our entire plan

Sylvie: It’s okay, I’m just not going to make it, that’s the not okay part but I looked too suspicious, whatever I’m not saying

Jake: I didn’t buy the tickets yet, we’ll try again another time

Sylvie: I’m really sorry

Sylvie: I’m mad, again

Jake: It’s not your fault, it was my meeting spot, I should’ve picked somewhere else, nearer the airport and away from everyone we know

Sylvie: We’ll get it right next time

Jake: Lesson learned, it’ll go without a hitch

Sylvie: I feel like this was my fault

Jake: It wasn’t, and I swear I don’t blame you

Sylvie: As long as you don’t, I’ll get over the rest

Jake: We’ll plan better, make sure nothing can stop us

Sylvie: They can’t keep treating me like I’m a normal kid when we’ve found out I’m not

Jake: They haven’t caught up to us, they’re still coming from a place of wanting you to be and everything to be like it was

Sylvie: I don’t know how to deal with them being so far behind, everyone, it’s driving me insane

Jake: We won’t let it hold us back

Jake: I’ll come ‘round later, bring everything you were most looking forward to about Paris with me

Sylvie: I don’t deserve you

Sylvie: but my family absolutely doesn’t deserve [the food and drink y’all discussed] so they’re not invited

Jake: If they get a song written about them right now it’s probably not one I’ll play for them either

Sylvie: 😏

Sylvie: It would blow their minds, I think, hearing how you think of me

Jake: It blows mine how you are

Sylvie: I will have to get better at being deceptive though, note to self

Jake: You can practise by sneaking me in

Sylvie: Come on, I’m pretty good at that already

Jake: Pretty good meant we had to stop at [wherever they got to in fucking all over the house before we said they got caught/thought they were]

Sylvie: And that was your fault, I remember vividly

Jake: I don’t think so, I remember you [vividly just relive her being loud and feral, we know the vibes]

Sylvie: Yes and that was entirely down to you

Jake: [blame her back by being like I did that because you did xyz feral thing to me beforehand, we’re just having a lovely time remembering to cheer y’all since Paris was thwarted, and we love a loop to get stuck in]

Sylvie: [do it back, obvs, like and I only did that because you were- pop off girls]

Jake: [shamelessly keep that going until y’all are literally at the start and there’s nowhere to go and nothing left to relive, we know what y’all are like]

Sylvie: You should stay

Jake: There’s no reason not to, at home everyone’s mad at me

Sylvie: Are you waiting for them to catch up too or trying to make it right?

Jake: I don’t know what to do

Sylvie: No, it’s trickier than my situation

Jake: Some of my friends are [somewhere in town he can get to from where he was], I guess I’ll hang out until my sister’s ready to pick me up, and I’ll talk to her then, but I’m running out of shit to say

Sylvie: She’ll process this break up eventually, it’s a bit rich that she’s taking more time than China herself but you know

Jake: Apparently she doesn’t like who I’m turning into, whatever that means

Sylvie: Literally, what does that mean…

Jake: Maybe she’ll calm down when we go to school, I know my mother will, she thinks that’ll solve everything

Sylvie: We can let them think that, until we leave

Sylvie: if it gets everyone off your back

Jake: When are your parents sending you back, is it still [however many days she has left of the week off she was taking for Sam gate]?

Sylvie: Yeah

Sylvie: I’ll be there for you Monday, I know it’s going to be awkward

Jake: I can’t decide if reaching out and talking to China before would make things better or worse than having to sit in [whatever lesson you have with her first] and just see her

Sylvie: I think it’ll just be as bad as it’s going to be, whatever you say or do

Sylvie: so, flip a coin almost, you know?

Jake: Yeah

Sylvie: What would you say, do you know?

Jake: Fuck you, that’s what I wanna say, but there’s no point to it

Sylvie: You’re allowed

Sylvie: sometimes people need to hear it, what they’ve done, it would allow her to level her own shit at you too

Jake: I don’t know where to start, I can’t believe she’s been with him this whole time

Sylvie: Just because you deserve a why, you may not get one, but you can try

Jake: Even less about my life makes sense if she’s not who I thought she was and it’s mixed up enough, I don’t want to hear that I was wrong

Sylvie: Yeah, I get that

Jake: I’ll ask my friends, the ones who really know her, what they think and hope they aren’t telling me what they assume I wanna hear

Sylvie: I’ll let you go so you can talk to them properly

Jake: Let me know when you’re cool to sneak me into yours

Jake: [the time that your poor sister is free to chauffeur your ass around, cos clearly any time from then, being the vibe]

Sylvie: ‘Course

Sylvie: what do you want me to do, if she talks to me?

Jake: What do you want to do?

Sylvie: Depends what she says, I suppose

Jake: I won’t force you to give my chain back if you don’t behave every second you’re wearing it, I’m not a monster

Sylvie: No, you’re not

Sylvie: and I certainly don’t intend on being perfect

Jake: It looks too good on you not to let you keep wearing it

Sylvie: I’ll only wear it Monday if you want me to

Jake: I do, and my jacket, it’ll make us both feel better about having to be at school

Sylvie: I’m going to have to give you something to remember me by in [the lessons y’all don’t have together]

Jake: You’ve got [a countdown to the time he said earlier about getting picked up] to think of your something

Sylvie: Narrowing down what you’d look good in is impossible but I’m on it

Jake: I don’t mind trying things on for you, if that’ll help

Sylvie: Here he goes, being motivational again

Jake: Being the boyfriend you deserve is important to me

Sylvie: I hate sharing you with the world, especially [the school]

Sylvie: staying in bed is always going to be the better idea

Jake: [the teacher who stopped him when he was trying to check on her the first ever time] isn’t guarding all your classes

Jake: tell me you miss me and I’ll show up

Sylvie: How wasn’t that years ago?

Sylvie: it feels like it

Jake: It explains feeling older than all my friends now I’m here

Sylvie: I feel like everyone's got infinitely more annoying since this all went down

Sylvie: How do I interact with people that aren’t you, again?

Jake: When I work it out, you’ll be first to know

Sylvie: I’m proud of you, even if I want nothing more than to monopolise your time and thoughts

Jake: It’s really hard, but I do want you to be proud of me

Sylvie: I want to tell my parents I’m your girlfriend just so I get to say the word to someone

Jake: Tell them, you are

Sylvie: They’d be irresponsible parents if they didn’t let you stay ‘round more then, have to keep an eye

Jake: We’ll probably have to keep your bedroom door halfway open

Sylvie: That’s okay, there’s a lot that we can do only halfway visible

Jake: Loads of things

Sylvie: We’ve done more entirely exposed

Jake: You’re really good at being motivational

Sylvie: It was my turn

Sylvie: and I’m in my room so I’m thinking about when you’ll be here too

Jake: I’m thinking I should be there already

Sylvie: I miss you like crazy

Jake: The only thing keeping me vaguely sane’s that they all want to talk about you

Sylvie: Do I want to know?

Jake: It’s cool, I swear, they loved the song

Jake: I mean, they’d be dumb not to, it’s my best

Sylvie: It was perfect

Sylvie: a hard act to follow, I don’t think anyone paid attention to… whoever went on stage after you

Jake: You’re a perfect muse, I’ve never been this inspired before

Jake: I wrote half a song on the way to meet them

Sylvie: You won’t show them before me, will you

Jake: It’s for you

Sylvie: I’m for you, I don’t care what anyone says

Jake: You should be sat with me listening to what they say, it sucks you’re not

Sylvie: On Monday, I’ll be good and be social, I wanna get to know your friends better than I do

Jake: Let’s have everyone over, your friends and mine

Jake: [a day/time when your poor mother is clearly working late and won’t know about this cool kid party, it’s giving literally monday after school tbh like they need it after going back because such is the level they don’t want to and obvs he wants to get to know her friends too]

Sylvie: That’s a brilliant idea, bring everyone to us

Sylvie: everyone will be satisfied we’re trying but we can still go off to a dark corner whenever we need

Jake: Do you want to go shopping tomorrow? I feel bad you didn’t get to before [the cool kid event]

Sylvie: With you? Obviously

Jake: Cool

Sylvie: I’ll try on anything you pick out, as a treat for tolerating the rest I also do

Jake: Anything?

Sylvie: Yes, Jake

Jake: Deal

Sylvie: Now you better concentrate on what’s being said about me

Jake: And you better find something for me to remember you by on Monday

Sylvie: I’ve already thought of what I’ll give you

Jake: Tell your parents about me instead then

Sylvie: Right this second?

Jake: While I’m concentrating, at least

Sylvie: Okay, that is fair

Sylvie: how do I make it less blatant I’ve been touching myself thinking about you?

Jake: Take a shower you can touch yourself as much as you like in, but you come out looking like nothing happened, it’s what I’d do

Sylvie: but you can’t, I’ll stop being mean and I won’t tell you anything else about my shower

Jake: That’s meaner

Sylvie: You can tell your friends I’m teasing you if you have to

Sylvie: [send him a picture of you about to get in the shower that shows you’re just wearing this chain without being a nude]

Jake: I have to tell my friends I’ve got somewhere else to be

Jake: they’ll understand, what you’ve just sent me is an album cover

Sylvie: You’ve got work to do

Jake: Not without my muse

Sylvie: I want to make art with you

Jake: I’ll make art of you

Jake: and all over you

Sylvie: I don’t want the shower to wash it away, record it

Sylvie: you only cum in me, it feels too good

Jake: The shower can’t wash away everything

Sylvie: Everyone at the gig knew, it’s so obvious

Jake: [a picture of his lovebites, as if he’s not with his friends rn, excuse him everyone]

Sylvie: Mine

Jake: Yours

Sylvie: [sending him an insta post where the thigh lovebites are peeping casually]

Jake: Mine

Sylvie: Yours

Jake: Say you miss me so I can leave

Sylvie: [voice note say it]

Jake: Stay in the shower, your parents’ll let me in

Sylvie: You’re such a nice boy, of course they will

Jake: The nicest

Sylvie: they’ll send you upstairs like I’m not waiting for you with my legs spread

Jake: They like me almost as much as you do

Sylvie: Then they’ll let me go on birth control so you can keep fucking me raw in their house

Jake: You’re not on it

Sylvie: I got the morning after pill, my auntie went for me, it’s cool

Jake: I didn’t even think, obviously you’re not, why would you be?

Sylvie: I wanna be, I’ve got it under control, you don’t need to think about it

Jake: I don’t want it to fuck you up, my sister says it does

Sylvie: There’s different kinds, right, I’ll find one that works

Jake: I’d take it for us if that was a thing but nobody has figured that out yet

Sylvie: I know, you’re sweet

Jake: It’s my responsibility too, I know that, but I’ve never needed to take any before

Sylvie: Don’t, it’s boring, I don’t want us to change

Jake: Your parents will sort it, like you said

Sylvie: An injection, a pill, whatever it is, it’s nothing to keep doing what we want

Jake: What’s some more boring medical shit, yeah? We’re already dealing with it, appointments, pills and whatever else doctors decide we need

Sylvie: Exactly

Sylvie: it’s nothing compared to the shit we’re on, whatever horror stories people have

Jake: I’m sorry I forgot though, that wasn’t cool of me

Sylvie: Debatable

Jake: You know what I mean, I care what happens to you, I should’ve thought about it

Sylvie: Thanks

Sylvie: I don’t really know what else to say

Jake: I don’t wanna embarrass you by turning this into a whole thing, wouldn’t be cool either

Sylvie: You aren’t

Sylvie: it’s way too late for me to have shame around you anyway, yeah

Jake: I just really do care about you

Sylvie: I care about you too, I’m not looking to make your life more messy

Jake: I know you wouldn’t

Sylvie: We want the same things

Jake: Yeah, we’ve got the same dreams

Sylvie: Who’d have guessed

Jake: And I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone

Sylvie: That’s mutual, if that wasn’t obvious

Jake: To everyone, while I was playing your song for you and anywhere else we’ve been or are going to go

Sylvie: We can’t help it

Jake: Since our first time I haven’t been able to

Sylvie: I’m not going to apologise for wanting to be around you, if anyone expects it, they’ll have to keep waiting

Jake: My friends maybe do for how abruptly I walked off, but they can wait too, I need you not them

Sylvie: I’ll consider sending a blanket sorry for that but only after I’ve seen you

Jake: Monday’ll fix it

Sylvie: I better invite my cousin too, if we’re talking of fixes

Jake: You can stay mad at her if you want, I’m the pacifist

Sylvie: She’s judging me but she won’t say it, I don’t know how to get past that, like with your sister and you, there isn’t a solution

Jake: Reach out but don’t get too in your head about how it goes, if she’s that judgmental she’s not coming to mine anyway

Sylvie: Maybe she won’t want to, who knows

Sylvie: I’ll reach out, like you said

Jake: My sister takes things out on me that aren’t about me, or are, but it’s not the thing she’s yelling about at the time

Jake: your cousin could be doing that

Sylvie: She just doesn’t agree with cheating

Sylvie: unless China is doing it, I guess, then it’s fine

Jake: Neither did I

Sylvie: As if we set out to do that

Jake: I’ll try and give her a better impression of me, if she does come Monday

Sylvie: It is what it is, you’re not going anywhere until we are, she can get used to it

Jake: I can get her to like me

Sylvie: Can you?

Jake: Yeah

Sylvie: I’m not taking up the challenge

Jake: All you have to do is believe in me

Sylvie: I mean your sister is never going to like me

Jake: It isn’t your fault that she’s stopped liking me

Sylvie: A little bit though

Jake: It happened when I got the diagnosis not when we got together, you didn’t get a chance

Sylvie: She probably feels like she didn’t protect you

Sylvie: irrational though that is

Jake: Totally irrational and totally accurate

Sylvie: She’s got to blame you for how mad and dumb this all makes her feel

Sylvie: at least you see it, you don’t have to hold it against her when she finally gets with it

Jake: I might let her visit us in Paris when she does

Sylvie: Be tourists for a weekend

Jake: It’d be cool

Sylvie: Yeah

Sylvie: We’ll plan properly, make sure we get there

Jake: We don’t have to rush, I freaked out a bit but I’m okay now

Sylvie: Warranted, all things considered

Jake: You’ve been the coolest again today

Sylvie: A bad habit, I guess

Jake: I don’t know how I’ll ever get used to being supported the way you do

Sylvie: You went to [the class she wasn’t in the day of the Sam drama], before anything

Sylvie: I’m only returning the favour

Jake: It’s like, for all my mother and sister’s feminist leanings, my role is still toxically masculine

Jake: I’m meant to be strong for everyone, however I feel

Sylvie: Who wants to be a burden? No one

Sylvie: but you can’t be to me

Jake: With you’s the only time I’m not stressed out

Sylvie: Me too

Sylvie: I barely think about it, the shit I spend the rest of my time thinking about

Jake: Yeah, that’s it exactly

Jake: it basically goes away

Sylvie: You’re the cure

Jake: I’m yours and you’re mine

Sylvie: You’re mine and I’m yours

Jake: [me like show up please sir before you say anything more extra, I love that you blatantly got a bus or something despite what you said to China about them being a waste of money cos worth it to you now and I also love that you’re shamelessly gonna get in this shower with her, no fucks given]

Sylvie: [just y’all living your best lives once again, can only be so sad about your Paris thwarting for so long]

Jake: [soz not soz Tomeena who are in because they let him in and had a nice lil convo with him before he ran up the stairs lol, maybe her brother too who defs also could be, at least your hater sister isn’t because she has her close friend group and is either out with them or at one of their houses rn, y’all are welcome]

Sylvie: Do you want to come over Jake’s on Monday after school? [then list who is going to be there, giving mutual friends, obvs not just like everyone lol]

Maggie: I’ll be there, ‘course

Sylvie: Cool

Sylvie: Are we good then?

Maggie: Are we? I’m in the wrong, do you seriously forgive us?

Sylvie: I guess I’ve been talking about nothing but him, you weren’t wrong about that

Maggie: You weren’t with your read of me, or the nerve wouldn’t have been touched that made us fly off

Sylvie: I’m not praying for her downfall

Maggie: I know

Sylvie: It just makes me think you think I actively intended to ‘steal her man’ or whatever when I didn’t even like him and you know that

Maggie: I didn’t mean to come down that heavy on her side, I’m happy for you, and you can’t steal nobody, whoever goes is after going, like

Maggie: honest, it wasn’t about you or Jacob Cohen, I was troubling myself over [the lad she fancied who did not show up to this cool kid event hence her calling him a saint and a good boy before lol] and his bother for a curfew, even though he didn’t make no promises to us and I had my mates there who are, any day, better craic, so’s the fucked priorities you called out are showing themselves there

Maggie: then something else, bigger, I’ve been busying myself with I’ve not told you of and what you said about all the hero shite had me doubting if I’m doing it for the decent reasons I reckoned or you’re right

Sylvie: What’s the bigger something?

Maggie: I’ve been visiting my nanny more than the weekly go with my daddy since [whenever Sylvie nearly died]

Maggie: she’d for sure not piss on me if I was on fire, on a good day she thinks I’m [one of Johnny’s sisters] and on the rest she’s not to know us from one of the girls who works with her

Sylvie: Why do you think you’re doing it, going to see her, like?

Maggie: Maybe I’m that arsehole and it’s to make myself feel better, but when I took myself it was cos we don’t none of us know how long we’ve got, do we? She might not be here tomorrow or I might not and we’re the only visitors she gets, for what, an hour or the half of?

Sylvie: I think it would make most people feel worse, that’s usually what I hear so

Sylvie: by default, it sounds like you’re doing it for the right reasons

Maggie: All to say, I’m sorry I acted up how I did

Sylvie: Well, if I’d known any of this, I would have chosen my words more carefully too so

Sylvie: let’s call it even

Maggie: Nobody does, in fairness

Sylvie: Not your parents?

Maggie: Not how often I’ve gone

Sylvie: They may worry about your sanity

Sylvie: God knows mine act like everything I do is some coded cry for help now

Maggie: Right

Maggie: but at least yours’ll be buzzing the boy’s the sort he is

Sylvie: Sounds like [her crush boy] is even 😇

Sylvie: If you can convince him to leave his house every once in a while

Maggie: I can’t with a lad like that, I swear, he’s to look at us how Jake looked at you up on that stage or he’s not to at all

Sylvie: I had a feeling you’d say that

Sylvie: but I get it, you can’t settle, it doesn’t work

Maggie: How’s [crush boy] to run away with or put a baby in us if he’s too set on minding his ma and her word’s final? Nah

Sylvie: You’ll have to find yourself a boy like your da

Sylvie: Boys are terrified of babies until they’re like 30, normal ones

Maggie: I’d get myself down the site but there’s no telling which I’m related to

Sylvie: Um, all of them? That’s how it’s done, is it not

Maggie: True enough 😏

Sylvie: Not that our family is living all that differently sometimes 🤮

Maggie: We’re the start, someone has to be

Sylvie: I bet our parents said the same

Sylvie: and to be fair, one thing right there, well done

Maggie: Give ‘em that 👏

Sylvie: The bar is in hell 🤪

Maggie: You’ve found heaven though, everybody in a room together Monday giving you and JC your chances to sneak off

Sylvie: I do have to beat the homewrecker allegations with his friends

Sylvie: but I don’t think that means I have to play hostess all night, nah

Maggie: Loads of his friends are a hang away from keys in a bowl, amount of swapping I’ve heard they do between themselves

Sylvie: 😷🙃 I’m good

Maggie: Me too, like

Sylvie: Are there any you think are cute though?

Maggie: [drop those peeps because you’re 12, of course there are, tis your boy crazy era]

Sylvie: Then you’re so welcome

Sylvie: I’ll give you a suitable introduction

Maggie: Oh will you now?

Maggie: I can intro myself, you know

Sylvie: You have an in, why not take it?

Maggie: Yeah, my outfit’ll do the chatting, as always

Sylvie: What’s the plan?

Maggie: I’ve to think, which of them lads am I dressing for?

Sylvie: 🤘 or ✌️

Maggie: Something like that

Sylvie: I’m going shopping but Jake is taking me

Sylvie: you aren’t going to want to third wheel that

Maggie: Ah no, I’ll get dressed without showing my face in [the shops you know these cool kids are going]

Maggie: mammy’s wardrobe’ll have just the thing if mine don’t

Sylvie: No doubt

Maggie: I’m on it

Sylvie: I might have to lift my outfit from [this cool kid establishment]

Maggie: I could get yous a discount but it’s only the standard staff 20%

Sylvie: I’m trying to save up right now, that’s all

Maggie: Leave the tags on, I’ll take it back for you Tuesday

Maggie: unless you’re after keeping it for the memories of yours and Jake’s first couple hang 🥰

Sylvie: God, that sounds cringe 🤦‍♀️🥴

Maggie: Sure, but I would

Sylvie: I don’t know if this is who I am

Maggie: He’s your first, it’s alright to lose yourself a bit, under and over him

Sylvie: Maybe a bit but

Sylvie: It’d be pretty rich if I lost my personality, I can’t let that happen, don’t you let it happen either

Maggie: You’re not her and we’re not saying he has that effect on ALL the girls as a blanket statement, like

Sylvie: When I’m back at school, I’ll be forced to have thoughts that aren’t about him, that should work

Maggie: School hasn’t forced us to have one thought ever I didn’t already want to, good luck with that

Sylvie: Hmm, you’ve got a point

Maggie: Don’t let my shots fired put you off, thinking about him isn’t some great big sin, nor’s talking about the lad

Sylvie: Being dull is

Sylvie: we should hang one night, just us

Maggie: Okay

Sylvie: Just tell me when you wanna, you can come here, or I’ll trek

Maggie: How’s [a day that I won’t commit us to] for you? I’ll 🚲 to yours from [something you’re doing, cos you’re always doing things is the vibe]

Sylvie: Cool

Sylvie: I’ll get [something that is her favourite whether that’s food or renting a movie, whatever]

Maggie: And I’ll bring [one of her faves so it’s mutual]

Sylvie: ❤️

Maggie: 💞

Members List:

gotspoons [Mod] (Rosie, 17, Chronic Fatigue)

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously [Mod] (Rich, 18, Multiple Sclerosis)

brainpain (Lauren, 19, TBI)

tigerbalm (Robyn, 15, Arthritis)

sonmychest (Kara, 13, Cystic Fibrosis)

princemyshkin [New Member!] (Jake, 14, Epilepsy)

ihatemyguts [New Member!] (Sylvie, 14, Ulcerative Colitis)

injectme [New Member!] (‘Denis’, ‘14’ = Margot, 12, ‘Diabetes Type 1’)

injectme: I’m new, I don’t know if the rules are I announce that and do some cringe intro, like at school, or what happens? 🙃

gotspoons: 😊 Welcome, welcome, always good to see a new face!

gotspoons: and you are totally free to intro (or not) yourself however you see fit, there’s certainly no hard and fast rule there

injectme: Wait, I don’t have to show my face, do I? I thought this was anon

gotspoons: Some of the group has shared their real name but no, you’re free to be your username and whatever you choose to share with us

tigerbalm: OMG! There’s SO many new people atm! 👋 I’m Robyn but yeah, you don’t have to tell us, like Rosie said 😸 we’re glad you’re here, that’s all

gotspoons: 👋 Exactly, truly no pressure, we swear

gotspoons: How are you feeling today, what made you decide to sign up and on?

injectme: I’ve been debating doing it for a while, going back and forth

injectme: the time feels right, my friends don’t understand what’s happening for me, and my family, the less said the better about them

gotspoons: There is a certain level of understanding that only people in the same boat can give, I think

gotspoons: I’d say that’s the ethos behind this group, even if we don’t all suffer the exact same symptoms, the experiences and feelings are often shared

tigerbalm: Agreed, my parents can be A LOT, they’re super strict & I don’t have friends anywhere else, but I’ve found them here 😻

sonmychest: Aw, Robs 💜💜💜

sonmychest: It’s real though, it’s cool to be able to come in here and know you’re not going to get one of two looks for whatever you have to say 🤨😬

injectme: I’ve been getting more than my fair share of those looks lately 🛸

sonmychest: People think they’re SO stealthy with it too, like

injectme: My sister isn’t with anything, she could pick a fight in an empty room

tigerbalm: I used to beg for a sister, but now idk, I’m not so sure tbh 😹

brainpain: I regularly feel like unaliving mine 🔪🔪 can’t lie

brainpain: + hiya new newbie

sonmychest: I’m so lucky mine is a they and not a nightmare, obvs, damn

sonmychest: Sister hate support group though, I approve

injectme: Oh, I’m a they too, that should’ve been in my intro

sonmychest: Cool, as long as you don’t mind how overwhelming she/her this group is

sonmychest: we have… is it like 2 active he/hims at last count guys?

injectme: I don’t, I’m still a she/her to most people

sonmychest: People you can’t be bothered having the convo with? Yeah, relatable

injectme: It’s a weird convo to have, sometimes I feel like a she, want to look like one 🎀 and everything, sometimes I feel the complete opposite

sonmychest: It’s all performative anyway, right?

sonmychest: Why not choose, if that’s how you feel

injectme: But different mes on different days of the same week doesn’t help the 👽 or imposter syndrome in every room, if that’s even the term

sonmychest: Some people seem so sure

sonmychest: 🎀s all the way, all the time

tigerbalm: Sorry, that’s me 🎀

gotspoons: Guilty…

brainpain: 🌈 but

brainpain: can relate if we move onto getting with girls

brainpain: still am 1 though ✌️

sonmychest: lol, this convos taken a hard left

brainpain: my bad 😝 there I go making everything queer again

brainpain: none of yous breathe a word to my future husband (unless he’s into it)

sonmychest: That’s definitely giving #yesallmen

sonmychest: limited as my experience is

brainpain: you’ll summon him with a political # in my experience

brainpain: 🤞😍🤞

tigerbalm: Wow 🙀 you guys make me seem SO boring in comparison

gotspoons: No one’s identity is any better than anyone else’s, you can be as proud of yourself, Robyn

tigerbalm: Thanks 😻 I’ll try

gotspoons: And no one here would want to invalidate you, I’m sure

tigerbalm: Everyone here’s the best, ILYSM all of you

brainpain: ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍

brainpain: couldn’t resist

sonmychest: allies deserve love too, babe 😽

injectme: I came in serious, should’ve been in my intro as well

sonmychest: soz newbie, we are capable, honestly

brainpain: I was about to come in aggy like speak for yourself Kara 💥👊

brainpain: but LOL nah we can

sonmychest: lmao post up

sonmychest: Rich would deffo show to break it up

brainpain: if only 🥺

brainpain: out here living like a war wife

sonmychest: watch that horizon, so cute

brainpain: every 🚂 that’s every film or tv ref I’ve got

gotspoons: Oh, I love The Railway Children

brainpain: shout daddy at him he’ll come speeding to me

gotspoons: Please don’t taint the wholesome memories for me

😫

brainpain: oops

ihatemyguts: This feels like you rubbed a lamp for a genie and a fairy godmother popped up in a cloud of smoke instead but lol

ihatemyguts: lurking has been amusing me in [a boring lesson you’re evidently in]

brainpain: story of my life

ihatemyguts: 💔

brainpain: + where have you been? lost your 🍒 newest newbie status it’s that long

ihatemyguts: That is devastating, like

ihatemyguts: already - points for not being a boy

ihatemyguts: my absence has been for fun, not health-related reasons though, don’t worry

tigerbalm: YAY! LOVE that for you

ihatemyguts: Thanks, the [cool kid event] was great, btw

ihatemyguts: What have yous been up to?

tigerbalm: OMG! You went 😸😻

tigerbalm: I have to know EVERYTHING, sorry guys…

brainpain: we all wanna hear what was great about it 🍿

ihatemyguts: Sorry, I didn’t get there early or stay late, or I’d have way more fun stuff to tell you

ihatemyguts: but I did get to dance and this guy played a song about me

tigerbalm: 🙀🙀🙀!!

tigerbalm: idk what The Railway Children is btw (sorry!) but that’s like ALL the films & TV I do 😻😻 you’re literally in an irl K-Drama

ihatemyguts: It does feel a little like that

ihatemyguts: and things like that don’t happen to me all the time, btw, I’m not that interesting

tigerbalm: Is that boy your boyfriend now?

ihatemyguts: Yes

ihatemyguts: funny as a bit it would be to turn him down after that, there was no way I was committing

tigerbalm: WOW

brainpain: take a deep breath or your finger off caps

sonmychest: 💨💨💨💨💨💨💨 I won’t be jealous of your lung capacity or anything

injectme: I’m jealous I didn’t get to watch [a band that was playing this cool kid event earlier or later, clearly doing more than one song, no offence Jake], their sets get better and better each time they play Dublin, wherever the venue

ihatemyguts: [linking an insta/socials somewhere that lowkey records entire sets even though you’re not meant to do that, sure people do] I bet they’ve got it

injectme: It’s not the same but beggars can’t be choosers fresh out of hospital

brainpain: been there felt that

brainpain: it’s sh*t* soz newbie

gotspoons: I do hope you’re feeling better after your treatment though?

injectme: They let me go

brainpain: Rich would sign in for a bed shortages rant

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I feel as though I must end your waiting

brainpain: finally

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I apologise, I was helping my brother with his Uni assignments

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: My ‘free’ time being anyone’s to monopolise as they choose

brainpain: brothers can be dikcs too good to know

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Undoubtedly the accusation would have him shocked and confused but yes

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Confirmed

tigerbalm: By me too

tigerbalm: that’s why I spend all my free time here, there’s way more girls

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I apologise again, Robyn

tigerbalm: not YOU Rich, boys like my brothers ONLY

brainpain: I’ll be on the floor if she calls you 1 of the girls

sonmychest: 💅🤪

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I’ll have you know I’ve been told numerous times that I have hair any girl would be envious of, so, perhaps I am better qualified than you presume

brainpain: pics or you’re a tease

brainpain: nervous newbie excluded there’s no time like the present for a mass face reveal

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I think that may be against the rules, Rosie?

brainpain: they can’t kick us all out

ihatemyguts: Mutiny lmao

brainpain: live a little it’s our flesh prisons not our bank deets

ihatemyguts: I’ve already been outed in the local community, like, makes no odds to me, honestly

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Rosie may be asleep currently…

brainpain: make the call babe

brainpain: you gonna boot me for this?

brainpain: [and drop a pic of yourself like a rebel]

princemyshkin: If Lauren has to go then so do I

princemyshkin: [a pic of yourself because you love a cause so obvs you’d come in rn to do this]

sonmychest: 🤯 omg how long does it take to get your hair like that Lauren

brainpain: hours but what else am I doing

brainpain: + people watching my 🎮 stream are into it 🤑

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Well, as it’s done now, I’d say it is up to your/your parents if you are under 13 discretion

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: In the halcyon days when we received funding, this group would have been an in-person support group, so

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Anyone not comfortable, understand the ‘mass face reveal’ is not mandatory, however much enthusiasm it’s met with

brainpain: can’t resist me even when I break the rules

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: They aren’t my rules, technically, I have slightly more authority and trust to uphold them but the admin/big bosses will undoubtedly decide… if they’re ever actually in here which I have my doubts about

brainpain: they’re yours to break

brainpain: your turn to stick it to the man 📸

sonmychest: Super subtle lol

brainpain: you too new boy’s put you all to shame as the only 1 standing up for me

sonmychest: Before you put us all to shame by being model attractive, casually, nbd

brainpain: @ him I’m hiding behind hair dye 🌈🦄

sonmychest: Well sure, I can imagine how often you’d get hit with the ‘but you don’t look sick’ new boy

princemyshkin: When I’m outed in the local community I’ll let you know

princemyshkin: And my name’s Jake, by the way, since us troublemakers are still here right now

ihatemyguts: [post your pic because direct callout to what you said like hey]

princemyshkin: There you are

sonmychest: FFS, no, I’m literally finding the nearest belltower

tigerbalm: I don’t look like a model, but I’ll post my face if you do, Kara

tigerbalm: count of 3?

sonmychest: Okay, I’ll do it if you do, Robs, someone count us in, not that I’m being dramatic or anything

brainpain: 3

brainpain: 2

brainpain: 1

tigerbalm: Okay, UM… here goes

tigerbalm: [the shyest selfie of all time]

sonmychest: [also post yours, no need to cheat lol]

sonmychest: You look exactly as adorable as I would imagine, HOW 😸😻

tigerbalm: I thought you’d be ginger idk why 😸

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Without sounding like a creep, I hope, you’re all very pretty and have no need to be insecure about your appearances

sonmychest: Thank you for the diplomatic dad answer, appreciate it for real

sonmychest: I WISH I could pull off ginger, I’d look so weird

tigerbalm: I wanted to be BLONDE when I was little

tigerbalm: imagine 😹

injectme: If everyone else is doing it

injectme: [a pic that we know isn’t you but we’re pretending is, if only because this person clearly has an insulin pump visible]

sonmychest: It would be giving [some k-pop idol who’s got that platinum blonde asian thing going on]

tigerbalm: & I’m more of a [different k-pop girlie who’s more your vibe]

sonmychest: Wow, we’re all so cute, love that for us, guys

sonmychest: Rich (and Rosie, if you are lurking disapprovingly) you’re the only ones left to go

brainpain: he’s back on his keeping me waiting bs 😭

ihatemyguts: The hype is real, smart move

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I assure you, I’m not playing chess or being in any way tactical here

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I am somewhat of a luddite when it comes to the social side of social media, I don’t know if I have any recent pictures of myself

brainpain: 👶 pics are fine too FYI

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: The mental image it would create would be amusing, undoubtedly

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: [but take a very boy who does not care and does not take selfies selfie of yourself now]

brainpain: f 💣

brainpain: if any of you kids need me don’t for a minute 👋

sonmychest: You did NOT lie about your hair, I cut mine off recently and now I’m so sad about it 😭😭

tigerbalm: I was debating it before my bday party BUT 🙀

tigerbalm: if it doesn’t suit me I’d have to photoshop my pre haircut head onto ALL the pictures

sonmychest: I think it would be chic, Robs

sonmychest: You can always fold half of your hair under and clip it in place, see if you vibe or not

tigerbalm: Amazing idea! BRB guys

sonmychest: Uh-oh, everyone is taking a minute now…

injectme: …

sonmychest: Did you share your name with your pic, newbie? I’ve forgotten in the excitement

injectme: No, I forgot too

injectme: I don’t ever go by it in full

sonmychest: What do you go by then

injectme: Nicknames

sonmychest: We can stick to your username then, if that’s what you want

injectme: I’ll think of a new one for here

injectme: if anybody has any ideas, all ears

sonmychest: I’ll ponder

injectme: Shuffle has spoken [and drop the song]

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Ah, excellent taste

brainpain: not their best

brainpain: no offence newbie

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Ms Harry’s French leaves something to be desired

injectme: Yeah, but I couldn’t ask you to call me Atomic and keep a straight face

ihatemyguts: Maria is a better song but worse name, kinda, Catholic vibes pervading at least

tigerbalm: I never know ANY of the songs you guys mention

sonmychest: Have you started working on your bday playlist yet?

tigerbalm: Not yet

sonmychest: You better get going, girl

tigerbalm: I wish you guys could come but that HAS TO be against the rules, right? 😿

brainpain: I’ll come if you’re serious about the invite

brainpain: give a 💩

princemyshkin: Me too, if you want

tigerbalm: 🙀🙀🙀!!

sonmychest: It’s never made sense to me, anyway, why can’t we make friends, it’s what people do when they join any other group…

tigerbalm: OMG it would be the best bday EVER

sonmychest: You are so cute

brainpain: sweet 16 cos I’m there LMAO 🥳

brainpain: + Jake’s jawline

tigerbalm: He has a gf, Lauren, that’s like the first thing he said to us!

brainpain: + he’s a 👶 more importantly

brainpain: 👀🚫✋

princemyshkin: I’ll ask her if she minds me dancing with the birthday girl, I don’t think she will

sonmychest: Your parents will be cool with it, right?

tigerbalm: idk they’re never cool with anything

sonmychest: It’s YOUR party and YOUR birthday, you should have friends there

brainpain: I’ll go boring brunette if it helps

tigerbalm: I COULDN’T ask you to do that

sonmychest: 💔 left wounded

brainpain: oops

brainpain: I can’t do ginger my b@tch sister would flip

brainpain: blonde so no one’s triggered

ihatemyguts: f me I guess

brainpain: I didn’t say boring with it

ihatemyguts: jurys still out on if triggers are real anyhow 🤷‍♀️

princemyshkin: The word trigger is actually a bad one in itself for some of us

brainpain: he’s got jokes now 🧠🔫 welcome to the club

sonmychest: y’all are gonna scare the newbie off

injectme: I’m not squeamish

brainpain: then I’ve got a story for you

sonmychest: Oh, God…

brainpain: check your pms newest newbie 💌😘

injectme: Oh, yeah, okay, I spoke a bit soon

gotspoons: What’s going on? I just woke up to all these messages

brainpain: nothing

gotspoons: 🤨

gotspoons: I’m going to catch up myself then…

tigerbalm: You’re invited to my bday party, that’s something

tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Ah, Rosie, let me PM you, save you some time

brainpain: I’ll say my goodbyes now 🧳🚪 slan everyone (add the accent in yourself I’m not doing all that)

ihatemyguts: 😬 Yikes

sonmychest: imma peace out too

brainpain: [drop your twitch deets so peeps can find you in case you aren’t allowed back lol, even though we know you will be]

gotspoons: [Private @ injectme]

gotspoons: I’m really sorry that this is your first impression of this group

gotspoons: and even more so that you were sent inappropriate material

gotspoons: Is there anything we can do/you wish to be done to remedy the situation?

injectme: It’s what happened to her, that’s what this place is for

gotspoons: Graphic content should never be directly sent to anyone, it’s far better we use our words to explain, in the group setting

gotspoons: It wasn’t appropriate to haze you like that

injectme: I’m here to get to know people not cause trouble for them

gotspoons: You’ve not caused any trouble, let me assure you

injectme: I don’t snitch, I’m not going to

gotspoons: No one is asking you to and it isn’t needed, Lauren made her intentions clear

injectme: I don’t think she had bad intentions

gotspoons: I am glad you’re okay

injectme: I am

gotspoons: If you’re sure there’s nothing I can do for you then I will mark this particular issue as resolved?

injectme: Yeah, I’m good

gotspoons: Brilliant, thank you for your cooperation on this

1 note · View note

theretirementstory · 2 years ago

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Ooh, bonne journée, has it really been a week since I last “spoke” to you? Goodness these weeks are flying by, it will be a new month tomorrow and we are hurtling towards the time of year that we all look forward to; summer 😊.

I visited “le médecin” this week, had a few things to discuss, was pleased to receive the form to be registered with him. My visit to the pharmacy saw the “new lady” spot a prescription that had not been paid for 🙄, I paid and received the necessary feuille de soin to apply for a refund.

I think I read somewhere that it takes a while for some French people to “accept” you. Where I have been happy to give gifts to people who have helped me with things, I notice a hesitance towards friendship sometimes. Such is the case with Monica; she is an estate agent, I corresponded with her way back when I lived in the UK, she was very helpful when I first arrived here showing me properties, even coming and moving the big stone cover on the water pit and climbing inside to read the meter ( I didn’t even buy the house through her 😳) , the first Xmas I made gifts and took her a bag of edible goodies, she was appreciative but I did feel I had overstepped the “friendship” mark. Anyway, I saw her the other day and she asked if I walked to Fontaine (where she lives) she told me her house number and said if her car was there to ring the bell and we would take tea or coffee together. How nice is that?

Had the monthly chat with my friends in Bristol, I am now booked on a flight in June. I am going to stay 4 nights then head up north to see the family. As always I am happy but anxious, especially after last years fiasco when the first train was delayed which meant that subsequent trains were all obsolete and new trains had to be booked “en route”. However, that was last year, we can only be hopeful.

Has Anie returned from her “trip” ? I don’t want to intrude on a bank holiday weekend so will wait until Tuesday to message her.

I was happy to see broad beans, rocket and lettuce coming through in the potager and so I removed the grillage. The following morning some of the broad beans had been dug up and a cat had 💩 in the bed. I was so upset! I don’t grow these things to have oodles of produce, I do it for my own well-being, getting outside, talking to the plants, watching them grow and produce, really really helps me through the year. I poured a potful of black pepper all over said potager, recovered with the grillage but will have to see about weaving string across it in the hope it will deter it again. As if to repay me for doing that, after spending Thursday cutting grass and tidying up in the back garden the cat decided to leave me a mangled corpse of a bird and on Saturday morning a pile of 💩 on the grass 😭. My sister said it was a shame that I didn’t have a sprinkler system, my goodness no! 😱 water is too precious a commodity to use up spraying at a cat, which would probably be wearing a wet suit anyway 😂😂. It’s going to be the old “scoot” type stuff I think.

So after clearing up after the cat, I have seen peas and beetroot shoots appearing, that put a smile on my face. I found the peony, which I knew was round by the forsythia bush, it’s leaves were taking in the sun and I am hoping against hope that this year it will flower. The two I picked up in the gaspillage last year are really doing well, the one I bought, not so! Unfortunately the beautiful hibiscus from last year looks dead, no green life in it at all. I am quite sad as it was beautiful but it obviously didn’t withstand the winter weather.

Of course, I have been to the bar this week. I love going in and reading the newspaper, of course I could go into the médiathèque and do the same but I find the bar more relaxing. I even had a non alcoholic cocktail one day, it was a Sandy Island, very tropical and fruity I really enjoyed it.

I turned up for “Knitting with refugees” only to find that the girl I had messaged was now on holiday and she hadn’t passed the message on. No harm done! Restarting May 15th 🤞. It was the knitting group with the French ladies and a couple of people took the items to be displayed and offered for sale…… I am still stitching mine up 🙄, so need to get them finished for next time.

It’s a busy next couple of weeks, but more about that later. Until then let’s have a look at an excerpt from “Days” by Philip Larkin

“What are days for?

Days are where we live.

They come, they wake us

Time and time over.

They are to be happy in:

Where can we live but days?”

Now I am ready for a cup of coffee, so I will wish you all a “Bon week-end” enjoy the Bank holiday on Monday 😊.

#france #nature #trees #barsuraube #photography #springtime #livingthedream

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aetheternity · 3 years ago

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Draken, Chifuyu, Mitsuya, the Kawata twins and Kazutora in:

When they see you with your ex.

Disclaimer: E/N means Ex's name. The ex changes gender for each one to be more exclusive I'm sorry if it feels confusing. Kazutora's has mild angst but otherwise this is really sfw.

🌟 Draken

☆ He'd kinda crashed Mikey and Emma's day out. You'd told him you had something to do this weekend so what else was he supposed to do with his free time? The three of them had stopped to eat on the outdoor patio at a nice restaurant and while Emma and Mikey chatted away about something school related. Draken sat quietly sipping his tea.

☆ You'd been kinda weird when he'd asked why the two of you couldn't hang out today. You didn't even tell him what it was you were doing instead. And you always told him literally everything about your life. Sometimes unprompted.

• "Hey, isn't that Name?" Emma's voice suddenly caught his attention.

• "Who's the guy?" Mikey questioned in between bites of his food.

☆ Draken's head shot in the direction Emma had pointed in. Sure enough there you were, talking with a guy who was about the same height as Draken. Weirdly enough Draken felt like he'd seen this guy somewhere before.

• "Is that?.. E/N?"

☆ Draken squinted still staring at the two of you talking. You didn't exactly look happy but you and your ex were standing way too close. He felt a little pang in his heart.

• "Maybe she just.." Emma cut herself off. Your arm came up to wrap around your ex's neck. Pulling him in for a hug which he just as soon reciprocated.

• "Let's just go." Draken said and Emma seemed to immediately agree. As soon as Draken and Emma squeezed back into the open doors of the restaurant Mikey hightailed it in the opposite direction.

• "Dammit Mikey!"

• "Mikey!" Emma called but it was definitely too late for that.

☆ Mikey ran up behind you tapping your shoulder as Emma and Draken made their way down to the scene that was now forming.

• "Are you cheating on Ken chin?" Mikey questioned with zero hesitation. His face stern and his shoulders bared.

• "Mikey.." You said

• "I would've preferred to do this later." Draken grit. Though Mikey didn't even spare him a glance.

• "This is.. your new boyfriend right?" E/N asked

• "Name." Emma began "I know you wouldn't cheat on Draken.."

☆ You sighed putting some space between Mikey who looked two seconds away from punching someone and your ex whose confusion seemed to grow the longer this went on.

• "I'm not, I would never.." You sighed before continuing on. "He's dating my friend now and since we had some bad blood between us.. I figured I should try to get along with him since he's staying in my life. But I'm so sorry Ken Ken, I should've told you yesterday when you asked."

☆ Mikey stepped to the side as you held out your hand for Draken to take. He wasted no time pulling you into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of your forehead.

• "Don't ever do this again."

• "Go out with my ex without explaining myself? Or get caught going out with my ex without explaining myself?"

• "All of it." Mikey interjected, hands placed in his pocket but his normal smile was starting to reappear.

• "Go home you two. I'm going to spend the rest of the afternoon with these two."

• "Oh? Is it because you're worried something will happen?" You asked Draken laced your finger tips slipping your hand into his pocket.

• "I was never worried, I just wanted to spend time with you." He explained

☆ Definitely should've just invited him in the first place because within a couple hours your ex and Draken have become better friends than the two of you were supposed to be.

🌟 Chifuyu

☆ Him and Takemichi decided to spend the afternoon in Chifuyu's favorite manga shop since sitting at home had become tiresome.

☆ Takemichi had organized a small pile of books around his body like a nest while Chifuyu just searched the aisles aimlessly. He didn't have a book in mind before coming here so he figured he'd pick one out from his favorite section once they got there.

• "Hey Chifuyu?" Takemichi looked up as Chifuyu flipped through one book while he held another in his hand.

• "I can't buy both of these. Takemichi which one do you think is better?"

• "Isn't that Name?" Takemichi pointed over the stack of books on his left sure enough just outside the aisle was you with a girl chatting away.

• "Who's the girl Name's talking with?" Takemichi asked looking up at Chifuyu, though Chifuyu had already ducked his way behind the bookshelf peering out of the aisle at the current scenario.

• "What the hell are you doing?" He asked coming over.

• "That's Name's ex."

• Takemichi fell in line next to Chifuyu peering over his head, "I didn't know Name dated girls too.."

• "Yeah.. it's not a big deal.." Chifuyu said as the two of you giggled about something a couple feet away.

• "If it's not a big deal why are we hiding?"

• "Shh!" Chifuyu ducked back as you and your ex walked a little ways away. "Come on let's follow them."

• "Why don't we just go talk to them?" Takemichi followed reluctantly.

• "I don't want Name to think I came here because I was stalking-"

☆ Just as Chifuyu had made it to the next aisle he tripped over a snag in the carpet causing an oblivious Takemichi to bump into him. A loud oof from both of them alerting you and your ex of their presence.

• "Chi?" You called annndd now you were coming over. "Hey Chi, what are you doing here?"

• "This is my favorite manga place." Chifuyu answered with a grunt, stepping into the aisle.

• "I know.. I just thought you and Takemichi would be at your place."

• "What's going on?.. This is what you were busy with?" He gestured between the two of you.

• "Chi." You stepped forward and Chifuyu took one step back. "You know how me and, E/N are childhood best friends and how my grandmother is sick right now? My grandmother is basically a second mother to her so she invited me out to take my mind and her's off things, She suggested we come in here and I said ok but it wasn't right of me to not tell you, I'm sorry baby."

☆ Chifuyu looked between you and your ex his eyes slowly beginning to soften.

• "I'm not mad love. It was just weird you don't normally do underhanded things like this." He pulled you into his chest for a hug and you wrapped your arms around his waist.

• "You should come with us." E/N said pointing to Chifuyu and Takemichi. "Name won't stop talking about how wonderful you are as a boyfriend anyway."

☆ A bright pink flutters over both you and Chifuyu's cheeks as Takemichi snickers behind you both.

• "Next time you can bring Hina and we can make this into an outing." Chifuyu said, poking Takemichi in his side with his elbow before wrapping his arm around your midsection.

☆ You guys probably end up staying in the store for a couple more hours honestly because if there's anything you and Chifuyu have in common it's your love for manga.

🌟 Mitsuya

☆ He'd been running errands for his mother all morning so by the time he reached the supermarket he was completely exhausted. He pushed his shopping cart through the aisles with a long sigh, checking off items as he went.

☆ He rounded the last corner glad that his day was nearly over and already thinking about what he was going to prepare for dinner when the sound of your voice caught his attention.

☆ His first assumption was that he was so tired he was imagining it but the airy ring of your laugh soon validated his suspicions. You'd told him you were hanging out with friends today after all.

☆ He grabbed the last thing on his list deciding to go say hi. He wheeled the cart directly into the next aisle walking up as you and a person he didn't recognize were having a chat with an elderly woman.

• "You two are so cute together." The woman gestured with a small smile.

• "Oh.. no we're exes and friends." E/N explained

• "Aw I'm sorry things didn't work out for you two." The woman nodded

☆ You opened your mouth to respond but Mitsuya's warm gaze caught your attention first.

• "Suya, hey!" You greeted, walking over to greet your boyfriend with a small hug.

• "That's the actual boyfriend." Your ex explained to the woman.

• "This is the friend you told me about yesterday?" Mitsuya asked looking at your ex with a blank expression.

☆ The tension in the aisle could be sliced with a knife and the lady from before quickly walked away to another side of the store.

• "We are just friends now I promise. There's nothing going on between us and they're having a party tonight that's why we're here." You gestured to your ex who awkwardly waved back. "I was going to invite you later so that you could sneak out when Luna and Mana are asleep."

• Mitsuya nodded his expression softening as he reached up to cup your cheek, "I wish you had just explained that earlier, next time just tell me I won't be angry."

• "I will, I promise." You gave him a quick peck which he reciprocated. "I'm going to head with Suya but I'll see you at the party later?" You asked turning to your ex.

• "Yeah, I'll see you then." They replied as they left.

☆ And yeah sure Mitsuya said he was cool with it but you two ended up skipping the party and after dinner you both stayed in bed all night.. (Do with that what you will. 🙃)

🌟 Nahoya/Smiley

☆ You'd only been dating Nahoya for a month and everyday you two met up at the same place after school.

☆ Sometimes (like today) he'd grab Souya/Angry and head out to meet you. Today the three of you were just supposed to grab a quick bite to eat before heading to the Toman meeting.

☆ The second the two of them had stopped their bikes Souya pointed you out where you were holding a box and talking to some stranger.

• "Who's that guy?" Nahoya's grin tightened as he watched the way the guy yapped away while you just silently listened.

• "He looks like somebody." Souya pondered for a second before his gaze fell on his brother. "I recognize his face he was in some picture on Name's wall."

☆ Nahoya didn't wait another second to storm over to the situation Souya trotting along behind with his teeth grit.

• "What the hell is this?" Nahoya grunted though his smile never wavered. The indent of anger extremely noticeable on his forehead.

• "Hoya, this is E/N he-"

• "E/N as in your ex?" Souya chimed up before you could finish.

• "You invited your ex here when you knew I was coming? What kind of shit are you pulling here Name?"

☆ His smile began to dip at the edges but it was obvious he was trying to keep up his natural facade. His fists clenching at his side, book bag carefully slipped into Souya's arms behind him.

• "I just needed my stuff back, I promise." You tried to explain, shaking the box in your possession for Nahoya to see.

• "I didn't mean to intrude on your-"

• "You shut the fuck up!"

• "Hoya!"

• "So you thought you should invite him on our date? Are you trying to piss me off?"

• You stomped your foot exasperation slowly starting to take over in your face and tone. "Hoya, I didn't invite him! I told him I was here and he's gonna be on vacation for three weeks but I needed my camera back." You hold up the camera that you'd fished from the box, Desperation thick in your voice. "So he decided to drop my stuff off with me and you just happened to get here before he could leave." You rest your fingertips on the bridge of your nose. Glad for the silence that soon arises.

• "I should go." Your ex whispers doing a little scoot around Nahoya who still hadn't completely cooled off.

• "Hey, stop it." Nahoya grips your chin pulling your shaky form closer to himself. "You should've just asked me to get your shit for you."

• You muster a little giggle, sniffling and wiping your face with the back of your hand. "You would've kicked his ass then brought me my stuff."

• "He would've deserved it."

☆ You pull Nahoya closer though he's still a little hesitant to return your affection.

• "Let me make it up to you please? You and Souya." You turn to Souya who's still holding both his and Nahoya's backpacks.

• "You're paying for lunch today." Nahoya replies pulling you into his side. He lowers his voice leaning into your ear as Souya walks ahead to his bike. "And if I ever see that jackass again I'll break his jaw."

🌟 Kazutora

☆ Baji and him had spent the day riding their motorcycles until they decided to take a break not too far away from the shrine where Toman meetings were always held.

☆ They soon found themselves parking their bikes and skipping stones by the riverbed.

• "So, why is it that you're hanging out with me instead of your partner today?" Baji asked as his stone plopped into the water.

• "They said they had something going on." Kazutora replied

• "If I was with someone that gorgeous I'd be willing to go with them but whatever."

• "Maybe you should have someone before you start dishing out relationship advice."

☆ Baji grinned wide throwing a soft punch which Kazutora caught with a snicker pretending to right hook him. It soon lead into a chase with Baji dodging all of Kazutora's playful jabs walking backwards and making sound effects to go along with each swipe of his fists.

☆ Baji grabbed both of Kazutora's fists pushing him back until he nearly tumbled onto his ass. His laugh unbridled in its volume.

• "Come here Kazutora I'll show you how to throw a real punch."

• "What the fuck.." Kazutora's gaze followed two people walking along the path that went just overhead.

☆ Baji's head whipped around to track Kazutora's gaze stopping on the two people walking side by side almost out of sight at this point.

• "Is that-" Kazutora was nearly gone by the time Baji had processed the words. "Hey!" He called out running to catch up but Kazutora had already sprinted to the top of the bank, jogging along to catch up to the people they'd spotted.

• "Name!" His voice boomed closing the distance scarily quick.

☆ You'd stopped dead in your tracks, turning to face the chilling look in your boyfriend's eyes as he stood before you. Baji right behind and practically out of breath.

• "Who is that?" Kazutora pointed

• "Tora.. baby don't freak out.."

☆ His earring clinked against his face as he stared into your eyes.

• "Are you leaving me now? Is that it?"

• "Tora!" You huff, putting your hands out.

• "Kazutora.." Baji called out already sensing the weight of the situation.

• "She's my ex but listen-"

• "So you are cheating on me.." Kazutora's jaw locks and when you reach out for his sleeves with pleas of his name he just slaps your arms away.

☆ When he leaves he runs for his bike. His leg anchored over the side already gripping the handle bars tightly when Baji's loud scream of his name rips through the air.

☆ He's got his bike out of park but just as he starts to drive away you dash out from nowhere and yank his handle bar.

• "Dammit Tora listen to me!!" You beg, he can clearly see the beginnings of tears stinging the corners of your eyes as you hold onto the hand still clutching his handlebars.

• "What could you possibly say? That it didn't mean anything? That you love me?!"

• "Yes! I do love you! You mean everything to me! I needed to be with E/N today because her mom went missing a couple days ago! The woman that took me in and loved me all my life is out there somewhere and no one knows anything about it so dammit Kazutora if you love me even half as much as I love you, don't leave me right now!"

☆ You latched onto his jacket letting your loud sobs fill the now quiet air.

• "You told me.. You love me.." His whispered tone barely reaches your ears as you continue to choke on your own tears.

• "I.. love you.. Tora.." You hiccuped

☆ His arms wrapped gently around your waist, face deep in the crook of your neck as you slowly began to relax.

• "I'm sorry." You felt him tremble as he held you closer than he ever had before. "I love you.." He reciprocated. "I'm here.."

🌟 Souya/Angry

☆ Souya tended to listen more than you realized. Like when you go on and on about a band you absolutely adore to the point where he stays up until almost 12 am to snag tickets for the two of you to go see them on the weekend. And this was that weekend.

☆ He'd been nearly bursting with excitement over it and now he could finally surprise you with the news after holding it in for a solid week.

☆ He parked his bike across the street from your house, reaching into his jacket pocket for the umpteenth time to check that both tickets were there. After a few more minutes of preparing, blowing into his hand to check his breath, smoothing his sweaty hands over his jacket. He rung your doorbell. The heel of his toe tapping against the floor as he waited for you to answer.

☆ When the door finally opened a person much taller than Souya answered.

• "Yup." The person pursed their lips one hand on the tool belt wrapped around their waist. For a second Souya pondered if he'd somehow rung the wrong doorbell until he looked at the number in plain view embellished on your door front.

• "Who are you?" It definitely came off more aggressive thanks to Angry's naturally violent resting face.

☆ Before the person could answer you came bounding down the stairs, pulling the door open wider.

• "Why the hell would you answer my door?" You spit at the person standing beside you as you pull your boyfriend inside, shutting the door behind him.

• "I think you mean thank you."

• "Fuck off." You tell the person who was already walking back to the kitchen.

☆ The naturally angry imprint on Souya's face seems to deepen as he makes eye contact with you.

• "I wish you had called." You sighed, tugging Souya into the living room by his jacket sleeves.

• "Who the hell is that?"

• "You remember how I said my ex is in the remodeling business.."

• "That's your ex?"

• "Yes but listen! If I work with him I can get a discount, I just want that wall taken out to open up the space a bit more." You gesture to the kitchen where your ex is currently examining the wall. "I would've told you sooner but between my friend coaxing me into doing this remodel and that drunk night with you and Nahoya it was hard to find time."

☆ Souya dipped his hands into his pockets, staring blankly into the distance. His brow furrowed deeper than normal and his foot tapped against the hardwood.

• "If you're uncomfortable with this I'll get someone else.."

• "Get someone else."

• "Wait before you answer." You scoot closer to your still ticked boyfriend and he makes eye contact with you again. "This kind of remodel normally costs way more than the bargain I'm getting with them."

☆ Souya blinked blankly at you.

• "Sou plllleeeeaaasssee, you can be here whenever they are." You gesture to the kitchen.

• "No I can't I have a job."

• "Fine.. I'll call you the entire time." He sighed with a roll of his eyes. And you rubbed both his arms with a long groan of his name. "How about this, I bring you and them to dinner. Once you see how disinterested I am you might be more for it."

• "Not worried about you, I'm worried about them." His forehead rubbed against yours and you giggled.

• "I promise I only love you."

• "Would you love me more if I got tickets to your favorite band for today?"

• "I'm never leaving you." You proclaim wrapping your arms tightly around Souya's midsection. "That's a proposal by the way we're engaged now. I don't make the rules."

• "E/N I'm engaged now!" You yell towards the kitchen.

• "I heard, congrats!" They yelled back

☆ Souya just scoffed but his cheeks bloomed into the deepest shade of red as he walked upstairs with you to your bedroom to help you pick out an outfit for the concert.

#gender netural reader #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers x reader #draken x reader #chifuyu x reader #mitsuya x reader #nahoya x reader #kazutora x reader #souya x reader #draken hcs #chifuyu hcs #mitsuya hcs #nahoya headcanons #nahoya hcs #kazutora hcs #souya hcs #souya headcanons #Kazutora when he sees you with your ex: This is all Mikey's fault

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kpop---scenarios · 3 years ago

Text

Cravings || One

Pairing: Vampire! Hongjoong x Reader

Warning: None Yet

Word Count: 3.1k

A/N: If you would like to be tagged, let me know!

"Babe, hey babe." Your boyfriend, Chad calls out to you, as you're sitting at the kitchen table, running over over bills again and trying to figure out how the fuck you're going to try to pay everything. You worked damn hard, and barely had anything to show for it. Ever since Chad had moved in a few months ago, without an invitation, you were stressed. Everything had gone up and doubled since he hadn't left, and he also hadn't contributed anything financially towards the household. You paid for rent, utilities, groceries and you even paid when the two of you went out for dinner. Chad worked full time, but where his money was going, you had no fucking idea. He constantly went out with his 'boys' , often coming home obliterated, and just expecting you to have your legs spread open for him when he rolled in, apparently that was your duty as his girlfriend, according to him. As if not contributing and acting like a man child was such a turn on. Not to mention the countless hours he spent on your gaming console, yelling and talking to his friends, leaving you no time to play any games that you like, unless you wanted to wake up a few hours before you had to work to sneak on it. But by the time you got home from work, cleaned up the messes he made throughout the day, made yourself dinner, showered and got into your PJ'S, you were too damn tired to do anything. You knew you had to wake up the next day and do it all over again, so any sleep you got was precious.

A part of you often wondered why you were in this relationship with him. Maybe you were scared to be alone, maybe you didn't think you could do any better than him, but you stuck with him, because for some reason, you loved the guy.

"What do you want, Chad?" You sigh, walking into the living room where he's sprawled out on the couch, headset on and his match paused. "I'm trying to figure out bills, you know that thing that keeps us warm, and with light and hot water, that you said you'd help pay and haven't."

"Yeah, babe, can you go to the corner store and get those Takis, you know the ones I like? The not so spicy ones though babe, cause remember I have acid reflux, and a diet coke." He says, turning back to the screen, laughing at something said through his head phones.

You could feel the rage building up inside of you, awfully quick, and it was seeping out of you even quicker.

"Are you going to pay for said snacks?" You ask, trying to keep your voice calm.

"What?" He laughs. "Babe, no, come on. I'm broke. I don't get paid again for two weeks. You know this."

"You just got paid yesterday." You breathe through gritted teeth. "Where the hell did all your money go?" You ask, your hands balled into fists.

"You know babe, I had the fantasy football league entry, plus I owed Kyle money for the keg bomber last weekend, and I took the boys out for supper yesterday. Shit adds up." He says, never looking at you, only focusing on the game.

"And that's my problem, why exactly? Why is it always on me just because you're not financially stable. Grow up, you're 35 for christ sakes!" You yell. You stomp to the kitchen, grabbing your purse and slipping on your shoes before heading back into the living room.

"Yeah, she's got her shoes and purse." He laughs. "She's definitely going to get my stuff."

"You know what Chad? I'm definitely not going to get your snacks, get your own fucking snacks, Chaaad. I'm going for a drink, with my own goddamn money." You spit, storming out of the house.

You're wandering down the street, like you had been for the last thirty five minutes, and finally you found somewhere that looked decent enough. You walk in, and the lights are on very low, the place is almost dark, had it not been for the red lights swinging above tables, or the string of red lights wrapping around the ceiling. Your eyes wander the open floor of seating as a soft beat vibrates through the building. Every person in here who was sitting with someone was leaning closely to that person, seemingly having an intense conversation. The vibes felt dark and eerie, but you welcomed it, you enjoyed it instead of being around Chad's fuck boy mentality. You walk towards the bar, sliding onto one of the empty bar stools and setting your purse on your lap. Your eyes were looking down when you felt a presence standing in front of you. You look up and see quite possibly the most beautiful man you have ever seen.

"What can I get for you?" He asks, his voice is deep, yet so smooth and calming.

"Double vodka and coke please, and for the love of god, keep them coming." You sigh. After your comment you see the slightest hint of a smile appear on his lips, disappearing even quicker than it came.

"Bad day?" He asks, beginning to pour your drink.

"Bad relationship." You groan. He nods his head as he slides your drink towards you.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asks, leaning on the bar with his chin resting on his hands as he waits for you to speak. You look into his eyes, and they're so warm and mesmerizing, you felt safe and secure, like you could tell him anything. Which is exactly what you did.

"What's your name?" You ask.

"Hongjoong." He replies. "You?"

"Y/N."

"Okay Y/N, what's bothering you?"

"My boyfriend, we've been together for just over a year, and well.. he's something, and not the good something like people usually say. He moved in with me, without even asking me if I wanted to, and I just kind of accepted it. He doesn't pay anything, no bills, rent, groceries, nothing. It's all on me, even though he does work full time. He forgot my birthday, went out and got absolutely plastered with his 'boys'. On Valentine's Day, he took me out for dinner, and can you guess who was there?" You ask.

"His boys?" He answered.

"You sir, are correct. I was ignored the entire evening, and then he and his boys left, I ended up paying the bill, and I had to uber home because he had driven us there. Not to mention the fact that he assumes I'm just there for his pleasure, expecting me to be spread eagle for him whenever he decides to show up." You finish, chugging your drink as you try not to gag on the strong taste of vodka.

"Why are you with him then? He doesn't sound like he contributes to the relationship at all, so why do you stay?" He asks.

'Honestly, I'm not entirely sure." You answer as he slides another drink in front of you.

"Now that's a bullshit excuse." He replies. "There's a reason that you clearly don't want to admit."

"Do you ever smile?" You ask him.

"No." He answers. "Now, why won't you leave him?"

"Because it's safe, I guess? I don't know if I can do any better than him." You shrug.

"Y/N, you have no idea how much better you could do." He says.

From the moment Hongjoong had a whiff of the scent that was coming into his bar, he knew that it was the scent of the one. He intensely watched the door, waiting for the one it belonged too to walk through the door. As soon as you did, it was almost as though his heart could have started beating once again, the ice cold blood that ran through his body could have turned warm just by the sight of you. He isn't sure what it is about you, but he had always been told that he would know when he found the one, and having been alive for over a century, he had just assumed that it wasn't in the cards for him, and now he knows why. Because all his life he had been waiting for you. The person that he would do anything for, the person that he would be anything for had finally walked into his life, and for once he felt an ounce of hope, until, you had mentioned the filthy human you were in a relationship with, not to mention one that treated you like absolute garage, and you had assumed that no one better would love you, but shit were you ever wrong. He was standing right in front of you, and though you had just met him, he loved you with everything he had and would do anything and everything to protect you.

"I appreciate your advice, Hongjoong, but it's getting late and I have to work tomorrow." You sigh. "How much do I owe you?" You ask, grabbing your card from your wallet.

"It's on me." He tells you, grabbing your empty glass.

"Well thank you." You smile. "It was nice meeting you." You tell him as you slide off the stool.

"You too." He says, watching you walk away from him.

That night when you got home, you couldn't get Hongjoong off your mind, a smile spread across your face as you walked through your front door, and headed into the living room, then it instantly dropped. Chad had not moved from the spot you had previously left him in a few hours ago. "Oh, babe." He says, sucking the cheeto dust from his fingers. "Kyle brought me some snacks, since you threw a huge temper tantrum about my snacks, you can just venmo or cash app him, k?" He says, going back to playing his game.

You went to bed that night, dreaming of one man, who was not your man.

Over the next few weeks, you had absolutely no desire to be at home. So you headed to the bar that Hongjoong worked at, everyday after work for a drink, or two, or four. In those weeks the two of you spent an ample amount of time getting to know each other, you were sure he knew you better than Chad ever did. You didn't want to see Chad, you didn't want to be near him and it was bad enough that he constantly texted you throughout the day, sending you lists of things to buy from the grocery store, as if he wasn't able to do it himself. But much to your surprise, he didn't text you when you never came home with his snacks, he didn't check in with you throughout the day, and honestly it no longer bothered you.

You felt your feelings for Hongjoong deepen with every encounter the two of you had, every time you saw him it was like nothing you had ever felt with Chad, your emotions were amplified around Hongjoong and you weren't sure how much longer you could keep them hidden.

"One more." You tell Hongjoong, as you set down your fourth glass.

You can tell he wants to smile, but he's too good at controlling his emotions. "You've had enough, I'm cutting you off." He tells you.

You pout, trying to give him your best puppy dog eyes, but absolutely nothing got to the man and it was frustrating as fuck.

"A bad storm is coming, you should probably get home." He tells you, drying off some glasses.

"I don't want to go home, he's there." You scoff, just thinking about Chad made you want to vomit. "I guess I could just get a motel room, at that place across the street." You say, pointing over to the run down motel, that had flickering lights, and probably a rat and cockroach infestation.

"You will do no such thing." Hongjoong replies. "You can stay at my place." He says. "Give me a minute." He walks from around the bar, towards the back of the building, and you can't help but to turn in your stool and watch him walk away, damn he looks good.

Within seconds he's back, grabbing your bag and scooping you up into his arms as he effortlessly carries you out the door.

"I can walk." You object.

"I know." He says, his face stone cold.

"You're very pale." You tell him, as if he didn't know.

"I know." He replies, unlocking the door to his car.

"And you're very cold." You say.

He sighs. "I know." He finishes as he slides you into the passenger seat of his car.

As soon as he started his car, the rain began pouring as thunder and lightning jolted the sky.

"You were right, there's a storm." You say, watching out your window.

"I know." He replies, this time it sounded different. You turned to look at him, hoping you'd catch him smiling but no such luck.

He continues driving, taking you out into the middle of nowhere, out of city limits, this was it, this was probably when you died. You panicked slightly but you felt it in your entire body that he was not going to murder you, at least not that night.

Hongjoong pulls up to a gate, punching in a few numbers to open the gate, which just blocked off a winding road. You squinted as you tried to see where you were going but it was far too dark for you to see anything, until you pulled up to a beautiful mid-century mansion that made your mouth drop. It was absolutely stunning and you couldn't believe that he lived there.

"Seriously? This is where you live?" You say.

"MY family, but yeah." He answers, parking the car near the entrance.

He hops out of his seat, walking towards your side to open the door for you, pulling you inside before you get too wet. He dragged you up a large flight of stairs, not letting you admire the inside of his house. He put you inside a large room, with a large bed and a bathroom ensuite. "There's towels if you want to shower, I'll be back in a bit to check on you." He says, avoiding all eye contact before walking out of the room.

You let out a deep breath as you take off your heels, unbutton your pants and unhook your bra, placing it all next to the bed. You sit down on the bed in your underwear and t-shirt, wondering what to do, until your phone rings.

Looking at the caller ID, you didn't want to answer it, but you felt it would be unfair for you to do so.

"Hello?" You answer.

"Hey babe, it's me.. it's Chad." He says.

"I know who it is." You sigh.

"Look.. I know you've been terrible, oh, wait, I mean I've been terrible in our relationship lately but I want to make almonds." He says. "No idiot, it's amends." You hear from the background.

"Are you kidding me right now? Do you seriously have Brad over to help you?" You yell.

"Well yeah, he noticed that we were drifting apart and offered to help me get you back." Chad explains.

You get up off the bed, pacing on the hardwood floors as you tried to process what he just said to you.

"The fact that you didn't even notice that we were drifting apart is all that I need to hear. You know what, Chad? I'm done. I'm done with this relationship, I'm done with you. Just get out of my apartment, I'm over it." You yell, hanging up the phone.

You stand there, taking deep breaths as you replay the conversation you just had, he didn't even care enough to notice that you'd been pulling away. That kind of hurt, but then again it was Chad. He was never very perceptive.

A knock at the door before it suddenly opens, reveals Hongjoong, walking into the room. He tried to play it cool with the fact that you were practically naked in front of it.

"I heard yelling. You okay?" He asks as lightning strikes, causing the power to flicker.

"Chad called, he had his friend Brad over to feed him lines because Brad noticed we were drifting apart." You explain. "But I did it. I ended things." You proudly admit.

"Good for you." He says, staring at you, while you stare back at him. A crack of thunder hits loudly, making you jump, and within seconds Hongjoong's arms are wrapped around you, like he was protecting you. You look at him and he looks at you, and before you can tell yourself not to, your lips are pressed against him, and he is kissing you back.

The kiss turns passionate and needy in seconds, both of your desires for one another coming out without any control. He moves you both to the bed, laying you down as he hovers over you, his strong arms keeping him above you. You wrap your arms and legs around him, pulling his body closer to yours, feeling him near was all you'd wanted. His ice cold fingers touch your stomach as he begins to lift your shirt up, you can feel his cock slowly becoming harder. You begin lifting his shirt, when his phone rings. He stands up, whispering an apology before answering his phone, barely speaking any words.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I have some things to take care of." He says.

"Oh, yeah, no problem." You say, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Get some sleep." He tells you before walking out of the bedroom door, leaving you alone once again.

You tried to fight the exhaustion you felt, but it was far too hard. You got snuggled underneath the blankets, watching the door, hoping he would come back but your eyelids got too heavy for you to keep open, and you swiftly drifted off to sleep, finally feeling some peace.

The warm sun was shining into the room, waking you up. You let out a little stretch before opening your eyes, only to see five men standing around you. You sit up, moving to the wall, as these men stare at you. You looked at them all, and they all looked similar to Hongjoong. Pale skin, dark eyes, dark head, blood red lips.

"Who are you?" One of them asks.

"Y/N." You whisper.

Another one speaks up, looking at the other four men. "Who the fuck brought a human home?"

#kpopscape #noonasinnetwork #ateez hongjoong #hongjoong #kim hongjoong #vampire hongjoong #ateez #vampire ateez #ateez imagines #ateez smut #hongjoong smut #kpop fanfic #kpop scenarios #kpop writing #kpop icons #kpop imagines #kpop smut

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boldlyvoid · 3 years ago

Note

no but trying to convince (s5) spencer to grow a stash, but he doesn't feel convinced as he thinks emily and derek are going to tease him about it and your answer "what does it matter? if it get you pussy" "i already get pussy..." he smirked but then "...alright you do it" so you you take a bath together and in there you shave him, leaving the stash (cos if if he changes his mind he has your tits to distract him) ... and you know what? maybe he can't use his leg or his knee but he can use his pretty mouth👀

you know me so well, just look at this and tell me he shouldn't have a stash? no one will laugh cause he looks surprisingly amazing with just a stash

NSFW under the cut

it doesn't take much convincing. since his accident, she's been taking care of him at home. including hopping in the bath with him, washing his hair, shaving for him. the whole shebang. and she'd do it for the rest of her life if she had to, it honestly made their bond stronger and she loved how cuddly he was when she took care of him.

sometimes he let his facial hair grow in on long cases, or on weekends between cases when he didn't have the energy to do anything. she'd carefully sit in his lap in the bathtub, and cover his cheek and neck in shaving cream and carefully run the razer along the curves of his face.

he would try and keep a straight face for her, staring up at her, adoringly, like she's the only woman in the whole world. his hands rest on her back, slipping down to her butt where he takes a few handfuls just because he can. she would giggle, shaking her head as she continued to shave his face, often trying out new beard and moustache designs and laughing at him until he kissed her to shut her up.

pulling her in close, getting shaving cream all on her face and neck and he covered her in kisses, keeping her giggles going because it was like medicine to him. he could do anything as long as he could hear her giggles.

"what if we left the stash as is for a while?" she whispers, enjoying the tickle that the hair on his upper lip made. sending a shiver through her as she imagined how good it would feel elsewhere.

"why?" he looks up at her, wet hands still wandering her body.

"I like it..." she shrugs slightly. "it feels nice."

he smirks, "I can shave it in the morning before work," he gives in easily.

"nooo," she whines, "I love it, actually. it's my favorite thing down there," she points down at where their bodies meet.

he laughs, unable to stop the smile that erupts on his face, he continues kissing her neck to hide it. "I'm serious," she whispers. "keep the stash, please? and you can do me whenever you want..."

he laughs again, "you're more insatiable than me."

"yeah, especially when you have the stash..." she carefully grinds against him, teasingly, "you can't tell me you don't love spreading my legs and eating me out whenever you want?"

he groans, pulling her even closer to him and nudging his hard cock against her under the water. "fine, but if I get bullied at work I'm telling them why."

"I don't care," she smirks, winning like normal. "we could buy a billboard for the building that says 'I like when my husband eats me out with a stash', why would I be embarrassed by the best orgasms in the world?"

"the best?" he let her stroke his ego when he wish she was stroking him somewhere else.

she nods, moving to sit on the edge of the tub, she spreads her legs and shrugs, "care to demonstrate?"

it wasn't the first time they did this, letting his leg float weightlessly in the water as he turned to the side and buried his face in her pussy. she gripped the tub with one hand, holding his wet hair out of his face with the other and tugging on it as he fucked her with his tongue. the feeling of his top lip on her clit, the way her cum glistened against it, the tickle it left and the way just having a stash made him 10x more aggressive down there.

she tossed her head back, moaning as she got closer and closer, noticing his hand had moved to his own cock. Stroking himself as he worked, moaning against her, enjoying it just as much as she did.

"fuck, right there baby," she's so close, pushing his face against her more as he flicks his tongue on her clit. he drops his cock, pushing two fingers inside he rather easily, curling them to rub her g spot and send her right over the edge.

her moans echo along the porcelain tiles of the bathroom as he continues to fuck her through it. he groans against her, and she knows he just finished as well, untouched, he cums just from the sounds she makes.

"see," she pants, "best. orgasms. ever."

#i love him so much it makes me go insane #ask #spencer reid #blurbs #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid smut #spencer reid imagine

385 notes · View notes

bumbleklee · 4 years ago

Note

Maybe a Childe x reader x Zhongli (poly) domestic fluff/parenting headcanons? (Fem pronouns preferred)

poly parenting is very rare but i feel like it’s going to become more common as we progress as a society :)) hope u enjoyed

before reading: usual cut for baby/child/parenting lol, also there’s no mention of who the father is (could be whoever u want)

babies

you were married to your husbands for a little over a year before you surprised them with a pregnancy announcement

all of you were excited to start your family and were elated to find out you were having twins, a little girl and boy

though they both loved each child equally, zhongli tended to spend more time with your daughter and childe your son

your family was untraditional but you made it work

having three sets of hands around really helped alleviate the stress of being a mother (you had to feed your children and there was a special connection and bond you had with them that your husbands didn’t)

zhongli had no problem getting up at night to help with diaper changes or fussy dreams and childe liked to take your babies on walks through liyue during the day

when your babies grew old enough to start doing things on their own, it was a race to see whose name they were going to say first

your son blabbered out “mama” one day and childe pouted for a week straight

your daughter fell behind your son for a while, becoming the second to roll over or start crawling or talking so zhongli took extra time to sit with her at night and help her catch up

so it really wasn’t a surprise she said “dada” to him (childe was very upset again)

zhongli or you are in charge of dressing the babies since childe literally forgot to put on their onesies once

childe is the warmest though and sometimes when he falls asleep on the couch, you and zhongli will lay the babies on top of him because he’s like their personal heater (it’s also really cute)

lots of family cuddles in your big bed

your husbands on either side of you and your babies somewhere in the middle

children

cue childe running through the house with your son on his shoulders and your daughter nearly falling out of his arms

zhongli is the type of dad to scold his kids for sneaking snacks before dinner but absolutely cracking when they give him puppy-dog eyes (you and childe are the ones who sneak them the snacks)

sometimes zhongli is a little hard on the kids, making them do their homework as soon as they get home or making them read chapter books early

he just wants them to be smart and excel but you and childe often have to remind zhongli that they’re kids and they have their entire life to prepare for the future

your daughter is still infatuated with him and it’s nice to have intimate moments with her and zhongli when childe takes your son out for the day (you have intimate moments with childe too)

zhongli has tea parties with your daughter and childe teaches your son how to use a bow at a much too young age

you have family nights every weekend, whether it’s zhongli sharing a story from his past or childe giving the kids a new game to play together

you have a heart attack anytime your kids do something reckless and since childe is one of their fathers, they’re constantly doing reckless things

one time you came home to zhongli tied up to a chair and both of your kids circling him thrusting empty paper towel rolls into the air

their excuse was that daddy said dad was a dragon and we were the knights that needed to capture him

zhongli was not amused

this is obvious but these kids are SPOILED

you and zhongli definitely try to ration gifts and presents but if your kids really want something, they go to childe who they know will buy it for them instantly

your daughter becomes a bit of a diva because of this, demanding new cor lapis earrings everytime you all head down to the harbor (and childe always gets them for her)

the most important thing the three of you agree on is that your kids can be whoever they want - they’re allowed to wear any style of clothing that makes they comfortable, cut their hair or grow it out, experiment in their gender expression and sexuality

you know liyue is changing and your kids are going to be the future

you get very emotional the more milestones your kids reach because you know it means they’re growing up and they’re not your little babies anymore

The day your twins start their first day of school, you’re an emotional mess. You were an emotional mess the night before and no matter how much your husbands consoled you, the feelings carried over.

You were helping your son put on his jacket when your eyes filled with tears again and you found yourself crushing the little boy in your arms.

“Mama, I can’t breathe,” He said quietly. The five year old wiggled in your arms and you finally let him go, wiping your eyes. Childe was beside you the second he heard you sniffle and took over dressing your son.

“Isn’t it too hot for a jacket?” Zhongli commented from across the room where he was tying your daughter’s sneakers. Her outfit was very cohesive (and very expensive).

“What if it starts raining? Or what if it’s cold in the classroom! Or what if there’s a sudden snowstorm-”

Your ramblings are interrupted by Childe wrapping an arm around your kneeling body. “It’s going to be fine,” He says, “If you get too hot, you can take off the coat. Alright, bud?”

“Okay, daddy.”

Zhongli finishes stuffing the kid’s backpacks with their school supplies and helps each child slip their arms through the straps. He was hesitant to send your children to a school at first, wanting to homeschool them, but you insisted that it would be better for them. You had gone to school in Liyue and the people that taught you were the same people that would be teaching your children.

“We’re going to be late,” Childe said, checking the time, “Everyone ready?”

There was a chorus of “yes” and Childe gathered your children at the front door. Your bottom lip was still quivering at the sight of the twins in their new clothes and little backpacks. Childe grabbed each of their hands and Zhongli trailed behind, opting to wrap an arm around your waist in case you started crying again.

“Whose more excited?” Childe teased, starting the short walk to the school building.

“I am!” Your daughter cheered.

“No, I am,” Your son said quieter. Childe only laughed and flexed his bicep, pulling both kids off the ground for a moment. They giggled.

“They’re excited!” You blubbered to Zhongli, unable to control the tears. Zhongli wiped away your tears with a small smile.

“Isn’t that a good thing?” He asked.

You nodded and repeated, “They’re excited.”

“Daddy, are you and mama and dad going to go to school too?” Your daughter asked. Childe peered over his shoulder and shared a cheeky grin with you and Zhongli.

“We’re too old for school,” Zhongli answered.

“Oh,” She said, “Then what are you going to do?”

The question made you and your husbands freeze. What were you going to do? You had dedicated the last five years of your lives to spending every waking moment with your babies, what were you going to do now that they wouldn’t be with you for hours at a time?

“I think mama is going to miss you,” Childe answered cheekily, “And me and dad are going to practice sparring. Root for daddy, okay?”

Zhongli rolled his eyes but was too tired to counter. The kids laughed again and cheered for Childe until all of you arrived at the school building. It blended right into the city of Liyue and you would have missed it if it wasn’t for the familiar woman standing outside. She greeted you, ecstatic to see a former student of hers now had children of their own.

Childe and Zhongli said goodbye to the twins first, kissing their cheeks and ruffling their hair. They moved to the side and let you crouch down to their level. You bit your lip to hold back even more tears and wrapped your arms around your kids. You pulled them into your chest and they snuggled right in.

“Be good to Madam Changyang, okay?” You whispered into their ears.

“We will, mama,” Your daughter answered and your son agreed. Finally, you pulled away and Madam Changyang gave you a sympathetic smile before ushering your kids inside the building.

“You did good,” Zhongli told you when you stood back up. “They’ll be back in your arms in no time.”

It was Childe’s turn to hold and kiss you. “Would a nice lunch at the Pavilion cheer you up? My treat.”

928 notes · View notes

57greenstreet · 3 years ago

Text

Gossip Guy podcast with Willem De Schryver

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYjtRYOGS00

translated by @jackfrostsander @bruisingknees @lblogss @yousmina and me :)

E: I do have another present for you.

W: Oei oei oei, presents.

E: I do that every week. I give something to my guest of the week.

W: Oei oei oei. Do I slide it?

E: Here in the front is a flap that you have to fold upwards…

[Intro]

E: Wassup people, welcome to a new episode of the Gossip Guy podcast. My name is Ender Scholtens and today I’m here with Willem De Schryver. Everything ok?

W: Sure sure (In Dutch sure is used as a confirmation to a question).

E: Is this your first podcast?

W: Yes, this is my first podcast.

E: Stress?

W: No, it will be fine, right? Relaxed.

E: I don’t know… (laughing). For the people who don’t recognize you, from where could they know you?

W: Hmmm, probably from the youth series WTFOCK where, in the third season, I play the role of Sander.

E: And we are allowed to talk about it in this podcast.

W: Yeah I also heard that. Yes, it’s over.

E: Was it a difficult chapter of your life to close?

W: Yes, I still clearly remember the last moment… Like really the last last scene at the sea… That was an emotional moment because you went through a lot as a group, you did a lot together, and emotional scenes, intimate scenes. But yes, I think, if I speak for the whole group that it was a goodbye to the series but not a goodbye from each other. We still keep in contact. Mainly through WhatsApp.

E: Yeah, the end of the series was beautiful. I sat next to my girlfriend when it just came online. Because there were a few scenes that we hadn’t seen yet and we were just watching them… And we refreshed and the last episode was online… The last piece was online… So, I thought… I really cried… It caused quite some emotions.

W: For many people… Also under the cast and even the extras that were present for that last scene… Even among them. I can remember that they got emotional because it really was over over. I think that we, WTFOCK, have been able to impact a lot of young people in Belgium. So, it’s beautiful… We closed it beautifully…

E: I don’t doubt that. I really liked the end. What is your favorite memory from your whole WTFOCK experience?

W: Hoh, hmmm. Do I have to choose one? Difficult to choose one… I think that the most enjoyable moments… At the end of each series… Almost… We were at the sea or in the Ardennes, as a group, for a vacation. Away together. And those moments… Away with the whole cast and crew… Being away for a whole weekend. And in the evening, talking late into the night and that creates a special connection and I think that, in general, was the most enjoyable… Yes, it affects me… You share, as a young person, a common dream or something we want to realize as an actor to succeed and everyone who works so hard for that… That’s nice to see.

E: I recently talked to Veerle and I know that if she sees Nora, like somewhere, say at a party… Then they stay together for the whole evening… Do you have that? With who did you have the best connection throughout that whole experience?

W: Yes…

E: That doesn’t mean that the rest is not chill or so…

W: No the rest is all stupid… There’s only one person… I hate you all! (joking) No! Yes, hmmm, I think that I definitely have the best connection with Willem. Just because we have been through a lot… I always compare the WTFOCK crew a bit to my own friend group, aside from the cast. I mean, I know to whom I can go for what. I know I can go to some if I feel sad, to talk and I know who I can go to to have a laugh. And who I can go to to have a general chat. And everyone has their qualities or like their own aura around them… Where I love to hang around. So, it differs from person to person. So, it’s hard to choose one person but Willem then in the sense that, if you jump naked together in a swimming pool and if you have intimate scenes together… That creates a connection, of course. So, yes, if I have to choose one person…

E: Is there a barrier that you have to overcome to play such scenes? Because they are very intimate, indeed. And I, personally, couldn’t imagine… I can’t act… But, to empathize with a role… To play such scenes… Is that difficult for you?

W: Huh, yes, that’s a question I get often. I mean like… Yeah and you have to empathize with that character… But yes, you step into that project with a certain professionalism and you say “okay, we are going to create a story and bring it to the public with certain values and that we want to tell something and show something” …So, yes, you don’t really think about it. So, it’s not like I thought “Ooooo, I am kissing with a boy but I am interested in girls”. That was not a problem for me because it really is about telling the story and making that together and if the story requires that then you just completely go for it.

E: That’s cool. What are your future acting ambitions? You now have played in a series, is that something you want to do more in the future or do you like theatre more or movie or…

W: I find it difficult to choose between theatre and film, for example. After WTFOCK I played in Déjà Vu, which you can see on Streamz and later this year on Channel 4… And I study theatre at KASK. And I notice the difference, due to the recordings, I am really in the field and I am busy and I work, while at school I learn new things about theatre… So, in my opinion I have more experience in television work because I actually have done projects for that and I haven’t yet for theatre, which is still school and learning. So, I think it’s currently hard to choose but I think, maybe it’s a cliché answer, but the combination is maybe ideal, of course. But I am still exploring and I will see how it goes…

7:02

E: What is your favorite food?

W: My favorite food?

E: Yes.

W: Hmmmm, in the past I was really a basic guy… Like spaghetti bolognese or so… But now, generally after my exams, I go to a restaurant with my grandma. She always buys. That’s always amazing. I am a fan. And I always take steak tartare with fries. That remains a bit of a guilty pleasure.

E: How long, do you think, would it take you to eat five full plates of spaghetti bolognese?

W: Hoh, hmmm. The thing is, my stomach is rather small…

E: Small?

W: I think that I would have to schedule in… Okay, after a certain time I would have to throw up and then eating further…

E: You’re allowed to take a break. You’re allowed to say… Okay, I take a few days…

W: No, no, not that…

E: You’re going to do it in a day?

W: Look, two plates… Three if I really push…

E: You get preparation time so you know like a week before… So, you can like…

W: Train yourself?

E: Yes, train…

W: Hoh, alee say about four hours…

E: Four hours?! Five plates, he? Like five really big plates…

W: Yeah but yeah, four minutes… I am exaggerating… Let’s say a day… In a day five plates…

E: Ok, that should work. Then you basically have every meal… Breakfast… Lunch… Dinner… and in between… pasta…

W: Pasta as breakfast…

E: One day should definitely be feasible.

W: Yes, indeed.

8:49

E: What is, according to you, the reason you were placed on this planet?

W: Fuck (laughs).

E: Existential crisis, okay? Have you never thought about what the purpose of life is and what…

W: Yes, certainly… Hmmm, I'm someone who worries a lot. When I'm in bed in the evening I start to think about questions like that and then I think “what am I doing? Willem… where do I want to go to and…” Hmmm, why was I put on this planet? Hmmmm… (speechless followed by laughing). This is really bad… It’s like I don’t value myself…

E: Noooo, but I didn’t expect a deep philosophical answer. Well, if you had one… really good but…

W: Okay I’m going to think about my philosophical answer… but no. If you want… No! Yes, now I'm really going to sound philosophical but… (crosstalk) Everyone who is on earth has a certain reason to be here and everyone… I for example have that… I really feel that… I never liked going to school. Especially, in lower and high school. I… I actually, on purpose, put my fingers in my throat in the morning to throw up…

E: Wow, that’s heavy…

W: And then going downstairs to say “papa I’m ill, can I stay home?” I don’t know why but that whole system… Sitting behind a desk all day… And those classes… that was not for me. And then I discovered my passion for acting and discovered that it really suited me. And that’s the thing… A lot of people often ask me like “how did you start?” and “I also would like to do that and where do I start and I have been rejected does that mean I am not good enough?” but I think that sometimes you shouldn’t rush to find your passion. It can take longer then you would like it to take. I think that if you too intensively search for "what am I good at?" and “I have to find something that I am good at” and… For me that’s happened unexpectedly. I did take acting classes on Wednesday afternoons after school and I kind of got into it like that… I think it differs for everyone and that everyone has their own purpose here on earth.

E: And would you say your purpose is acting?

W: Yeah…

E: There isn’t a right answer but how does it feel for you at the moment? Is that the thing you love doing the most or do you see yourself doing for a long time?

W: The thing is… I’m a person who gets tired of things very quickly. I’ve had a lot of hobbies.

E: So maybe next week you want to garden or something?

W: No, no I wouldn’t say that. No the thing is, with acting that isn’t the case. Since I was twelve… well first on amateur level…

E: How old are you now?

W: 19.

E: Oh wow I thought you were my age. 19… damn bro you’re three years younger than me.

W: 2001 represent.

E: That’s literally… you’re the same age as my brother! What the shit. Alright, no okay.

W: In November so almost 2002. I’m really a latecomer.

E: What?! You look like you’re the same age as me and everything.

12:14

W: But that’s honestly – thank you for saying that! I always used to be the “little guy.” None of the girls wanted to be with me cause they just thought I was cute.

E: I see.

W: And they came to me to talk about their love lives.

E: Oh, okay.

W: So I was always that guy who was like: “I’m in love with you.” “Oh, how cute! You’re so cute!” So I was always like: “Okay then, I’m never going to find anyone, I’m always going to stay… short. I’ll be all alone.” And then all of a sudden I –

E: Do you think height matters in regard to your chances with certain… people?

W: At this age I don’t think it does anymore, but I do think that – I think at – I just remember in high school that the romantic idea of what love was supposed to look like was very: a boy and a girl, and the boy has to be taller and stronger and bigger than the girl. But I think that now it’s more… I mean, at my age I’m convinced it’s more fluid than that, and it doesn’t have to be that way. So it doesn’t have to be an issue anymore.

E: But still, when you go on Twitter, short guys are still –

W: Yeah.

E: Totally annihilated.

W: I have notice – I have noticed – Yeah, it’s still… It’s still this… general thing that people get stuck on. Like: “Oh, a short dude. That’s not okay.” Or whatever.

E: Or like the guy has to be taller. But no, we’re – we’re – not… not all relationships… we’re really generalizing here. But I get what you mean.

W: Yeah.

E: No, it’s – I do think it’s still important. I think that when you’re, and this is really harsh, but that a lot of people look at you differently when you’re taller. I have this dude in my friend group, Louis Ledegen, and he’s close to 2 meters tall, and just some girls look at him and they just think that’s so… attractive or whatever. And I just can’t even imagine.

W: I don’t get that either.

E: That that makes them go like: “Wow!”

W: I was in the train just now and this dude walked by me and he was honestly like 2 meters tall and I was just thinking: “When you’re that tall, and you’re with…” I mean, the girl almost has to get on a stepping stool to reach him for a kiss! And girls are like – I mean, I’ve heard before that girls think it’s attractive when a man is really tall.

E: Yeah.

W: And yeah, I don’t know… I don’t totally get it.

E: No.

W: Maybe it’s cause I’m not that tall myself, that I’m like trying to protect myself and be all: “That’s not necessary!”

E: Yeah! If anybody knows the answer, do we, being shorter guys, have less of a chance?

W: Let us know, please.

14:53

E: Please let us know! We need some answers! Now in the show, wtFOCK, your hair’s a different color.

W: Yeah.

E: Yeah. Is that something… So that was actually – it wasn’t really blonde?

W: It was completely bleached.

E: Bleached.

W: It was more to the… But the thing is that they had to do it twice, cause the first time… I got there, for the first table read with the director and Willem [Herbots] and they were like: “Hey, Willem. We wanted to ask you something. We’d like to bleach your hair for the role.”

E: Yeah.

W: And I was like: “… Okay.”

E: Okay.

W: “And why?” No. “Just for the character and stuff.” So I was like: “Okay. That’s fine.” The thing is I had to be at the hairdresser for 4 hours for this.

E: Oh wow, heavy.

W: It was like this and this product, and it had to sit for a long time. It had to be bleached all over. And I got out of there the first time and I was completely yellow – but yellow like an egg.

E: Oh, shit!

W: And I… My mom dropped me off, and I texted her: “I’m done, will you come get me?” And I saw my mom approach and she just passed me by.

E: Oh wow.

W: She didn’t – she almost didn’t recognize me anymore. Like halfway - she was like – and then she was like: “Oh! Willem!” Like she hadn’t seen –

E: Oh shit.

W: That it was me. That I looked completely different. And then I arrived for another table read and Tom [Goris – director] was like: “Yeah… We’re not gonna go this route… This is too yellow.” So then I spent another 4 hours at the hairdresser. After that I had to be there for four hours almost every month. I did think it was cool to have bleached hair, but… You have to be at the hairdresser for so long, so that really wasn’t… my thing. I mean, I had some really cool moments with Mitch [Fabry – hair & make up wtFOCK]. Thanks, Mitch.

E: Would you ever dye your hair again?

W: Uhm.

E: Maybe another color?

W: Yeah, I don’t think so. I’m quite happy with my hair color, actually, I don’t know.

E: Alright.

W: Now it’s also like… Everyone always asks me: “So this is your natural hair color?”

E: Yeah.

W: And then I have to tell them: “Yeah.” And it’s like: “Oh, okay!” It’s this switch. But no, I’m happy with my hair. It’s fine.

17:03

E: I can also tell that you’ve got an earring? You can’t really tell on camera, but –

W: I’ll come a little closer [to the camera]. Yeah, I only got it recently, four weeks or something.

E: Yeah. Was it an impulsive, drunken decision, or something you wanted… for some time?

W: I’ve wanted it for a long time, but I was a little anxious about it like: “It’s not gonna look good on me,” and then after a while, a couple of months ago, I was like: “Fuck it, I’m just gonna do it.” And if it didn’t look good I could still just take it out, so it doesn’t really matter. But all in all I was pretty happy with it. My father, my parents – my mom: “Oh, so nice!!” And it was like – at first they give you a stud and then after four weeks you can change it to a hoop. And I really wanted a hoop, and I even asked the people in the (piercing) shop: “Can’t I please just get a hoop straight away?” And they were like: “No, sorry, it doesn’t work like that. For hygiene reasons that’s not okay.”

E: Okay.

W: But okay, so I had to wait four weeks and then eventually I could change it to the golden hoop. So I get home and the first thing my father said was: “Wow, you look like a douchebag.” That was the first thing out of his mouth, that I looked like a douchebag.

E: Is that the look you were going for?

W: No, not at all! Not at all!

E: I think it looks cool.

W: Thanks.

E: Cause a little while ago I wanted one, and so I put on my girlfriend’s earring – because even if your ear isn’t pierced it sticks a little –

W: Yeah.

E: And so I just put it on there for a day or something, and then I was like: “Okay, that’s quite enough.” I don’t know if I’d want it for longer than that. Recently I’ve been getting into rings and stuff though.

W: I wore rings for a long time, but I don’t have any anymore. I actually want – I like them too. But I have to –

18:47

E: If I’d known, I would’ve brought you a gift!

W: Go shopping. Goddamn!

E: I did bring you another gift though!

W: Another gift? Oei oei oei, gifts!

E: This is something I do every week, I give my guest of the week something.

W: Oei oei oei.

E: It’s just…

W: Do I just slide it –

E: There’s a little hatch over here, that you have to lift, and then you can just lift it like that. There we go.

W: There we go.

E: White hairspray.

W: If I’d want to go back to – there we have it. Too good.

E: It can be washed out really easily as well. So this way you don’t have to be at the hairdresser for like four hours. And then when you’re sick of it, you can just get rid of it again!

W: That was the thing… Thank you, by the way.

E: You’re very welcome.

W: Now I can go back – Now I can go back to my past life. No, that was the thing as well. People who – people who - after wtFOCK came online, people really recognized me with the white hair. I mean, it’s pretty noticeable, when I’m walking through Ghent station – if someone with bleached hair. I mean, if you watch the show, I can imagine that when you see someone with bleached hair, you immediately connect the two and think: “Oh, that could be him.” And then you run in to some people who ask for pictures. After that my hair was really short, cause the people from Déja-Vu were like: “We’re not gonna do this, just go back to your natural hair color.” So I cut it all off, and there was this time where… nobody came to talk to me anymore. I was able to just be myself again. It was as if – looking back on it, it was actually really nice that for wtFOCK I was able to completely get into a different character with different hair. And the first time I got rid of the hair I really noticed that was no longer being associated with the character.

E: Hannah Montana vibes! Your hair changes color and nobody knows who you are anymore.

W: “Who are you?”

E: “Who the fuck are you?!”

W: “Does anybody want to take pictures with me? It’s me! It’s me! I swear!”

E: “I’m that dude from wtFOCK! I’m that dude from wtFOCK!”

W: So if people don’t recognize me anymore I can just… *pshhht* in the morning.

E: Exactly! If you want to take some more pictures, you can just…

W: No, no. That’s fine. No, yeah.

E: It’s kind of crazy, actually. Because, honestly? The very first time I saw a flash of you, with this hair color, I also thought: “I recognize you from somewhere…” But I think I’d already gotten in contact with you through social [media] and I didn’t put two and two together that you…

W: Yeah.

E: “Aaah!”

W: “Aaah! You’re that guy!”

E: Yeah, so…

W: But that’s the whole thing. If someone recognizes me, which doesn’t happen that often by the way, it’s always – I think it’s funny to be like: “No, that’s not me.”

E: No.

W: People really start doubting themselves, it’s very: “Uhm, can I ask you a question? Are you that guy from wtFock?” “Me? No.”

E: “No!”

W: “That’s not me.” And people will often be like: “Oh? What? But I recognize you…” That doubt on their faces is pretty funny but yeah, then I tell them it’s me.

E: Just the reaction of someone being like: “Huh, do I know you from somewhere?” “Do you watch porn?”

W: The confrontation.

E: “Oh… qmdkjg.” And it’d be even better if the parents were right there as well. “Argh!”

W: “Yes, Jürgen, care to explain yourself, young man?”

E: No, it’s just funny to joke about. But you’ve never – Do you just get: “Hey, are you that guy from wtFOCK?” Or have people also asked you: “Do I know you from somewhere?” Or: “What do I know you from?”

W: Yeah, it depends. The thing is – I go to school in Ghent and when the [popular place where college students go out] was still open before Covid-19, not that I went there often because I didn’t really like it there –

E: No.

W: - in the sense that the combination of young people who –

E: Watch wtFOCK.

W: - watch wtFOCK and alcohol – and people who’ve had alcohol to drink –

E: And are horny?

W: - their limits or boundaries are just gone. “Oh my god!!! You’re that dude from wtFOCK!! Can I kiss you??” Things like that!

E: Oh, fuck!

W: And I was really like: “Okay…?” I’m just a regular dude and I’m trying – and I actually thought it was less annoying for myself, but I thought it was more disruptive for my friends. Like even when we were just walking down the street, we got recognized a couple of times, and I was just like: I just want to have fun with my friends, and not have to spend too much time thinking. That’s another thing I was subconsciously thinking about. Imagine I drink way too much.

E: Yeah.

W: And I end up in the gutter somewhere, and people start filming that… So yeah, that made… So because of that I spent more time in friends’ dorm rooms just having dorm parties.

E: And since your bleached hair is gone, have you gone to a party?

W: When my bleached hair was gone corona was already a thing so I haven’t been able to enjoy it. But it’s starting to come back [the parties] so that’s nice. I’m looking forward to… tomorrow I’m going-

E: Are you going as well?

W: Are you going to Plein Air by Fuse?

E: Tomorrow I’m going to Jaimie Lee who-

W: …Is going to DJ at three festivals.

E: Yeah at three festivals and I will be backstage I guess.

W: Okay.

E: One of those festivals?

W: Yeah I don’t know. I have tickets for Fuse Open Air in Brussels.

24:19

E: I honestly have no idea where I’m going. Anyway, I’m excited. And I always asked, what’s the first event you went to ever since it’s allowed? Did you go to We Can Dance festival?

W: No I was studying.

E: Was today your last exam or yesterday?

W: Yesterday was my last exam in the morning. I was stressing so much, because I thought I would fail, but eventually I think it went relatively well. If you’re watching professors, let me pass please. No I think it went well.

E: Are you someone who is stress resistant?

W: Uhh no.

E: No?

W: I let it take over my body.

E: You get physically unwell?

W: I will be laying in bed and I’m tossing and turning and sweating. And I think about how I’m not gonna pass tomorrow. And the combination with my worries is really not good. It makes me stay up really late. The thing is with stress resistant, I for example made my own play at high school about a kid with divorced parents for my final work and the whole audience was filled with my family and my parents. That’s pretty confronting to tell a story that’s also a little bit of their life and is pretty personal. I’m always stressed for things like that. Then it’s weird – from the first word I spoke I had a lot of stress and worries and the first sentence that I said was something like “I don’t know what to do”, and then it’s all of a sudden poofff. The train has left.

E: You said you didn’t really know what to do now.

W: That’s the first sentence of the text that I wrote and the moment I said that sentence I thought in my head “the train has left, there’s no way back now” and then the stress disappears automatically. But before the final rehearsal there was a moment that I was moving around heavily and I was throwing with chairs. And afterwards I had to pack moving boxes, which was okay. But from moving around and the combination of stress it made me almost gag in the box from the stress so I almost puked. So at these moments it gets pretty heavy.

E: Did other people notice or were you hiding it?

W: Yeah the final rehearsal was luckily not with an audience, but my teachers were like “Everything alright?” and I was like “Yeah I’m good. It’s a bit much”. But when it comes to stress, a lot of people always say – I’m even a little stressed right now actually.

E: Really?

W: Podcasts, oh no no.

E: Oh shit. You have to be (stressed)

W: A lot of pressure on my shoulder here. No, but a lot of people say that it doesn’t look like that I’m stressed even though I really am dying from all the stress.

E: Only now you can hide it really well. You should become an actor.

W: A lot of people have said that to me often, but it’s not my interest. Also not much work in the field.

E: That too, fuck. Are you someone who constantly pretends like you’re okay?

W: Yes.

E: Even when you have a lot of shit going on in your head and you’re processing other things?

W: I'm one person. One person?

E: "I'm one person" [laughs]

W: I am one person. No, but I'm someone who often keeps their stuff to themselves, so that I can listen to what others need.

28:15

E: That was my next question. You listen more to other people’s problems and you’re the person people come to with their problems?

W: I think, at least I hope, that a lot of my friends do know that they can always come to me for a talk or a phone call. I'm someone that will shove away their happiness for someone else, which isn’t always positive of course.

E: It is a beautiful characteristic, but it shouldn’t take over indeed.

W: In the past it has happened that I was falling apart, but I kept pushing it away, because I wanted to take care of someone else. I noticed this a lot during the divorce of my parents. My parents had a hard time with the divorce and I remember that I came home as a little boy and I saw my mom sitting and I felt the duty to comfort her and to be there for her, even though I was 8 or 9 years old. That’s not something you expect to do or think from an 8 year old. It really broke me and now I can openly speak about it, because I have had enough conversations with my parents about it, about how it was for me. And I made a play about it, as I told earlier, so it’s been a whole process and that has scarred me till at least my 16th. My parents got divorced when I was 5 or 6 years old. It took me a long time to open up because of that. I notice it a lot in previous relationships, that I walk away from fights, because I would find the confrontation too heavy to get into a fight and to discuss. The divorce and fights with my parents scarred me so hard that I didn’t want that again. I wanted everything to be rainbow and sunshine, but life doesn’t work like that. And that was partly a misconception from me, that I thought that a relationship had to be perfect, if there is a fight, then it’s not going well. Now I realize that fights are part of a relationship. And also part of steps you take into accepting each other, listening to each other and understanding each other. It’s needed for a stronger connection. You can’t, well you can, but in my eyes you can’t be with someone for a long time without ever having had a conflict. Even if it’s a discussion, because then you’re adapting too much to the other, and then you say okay, I’m adapting to the demands of her and I suppress my own things or things I want to do, only to avoid the discussion, and that’s something I learned. And that’s how everyone learns their own things along the way.

E: You still see it in the youth, those romantic movies, where everyone is so in love and it always ends with a kiss or something and it’s always good and then you think, this must be the case in real life. Why can’t I find Gabriella Montez for my Troy Bolton. Even though that was a shitty relationship too, they were constantly fighting. No, but that gives a wrong image about relationships and for other things because of movies. And the reality is just different.

32:16

W: Yes. I recently for the first time -this is kinda embarrassing because it’s a must see- watched The Notebook.

E: Me too! What did you think?

W: It has been a few weeks ago. Or a few weeks, maybe 3 or something.

E: I watched it last weekend.

W: I almost cried.

E: Really?

W: I’m a really emotional person. I can really cry. I can really get lost in a movie. “No not the puppy, why?!” Those things, where I think "Willem, act normal". But no it was a beautiful movie.

E: Yeah I have a different opinion, because I just fell asleep. I fell asleep, because it all went so slow, it started so slow. I didn’t even watch the kiss in the rain scene.

W: The moment. It’s in literally every romantic movie. In the rain, it happens everywhere.

Ender: Yeah mate, it’s such a cliché actually, but yeah.

W: I bet you that they’re just standing there with a garden hose.

E: Definitely.

W: It can’t be that they’re waiting, “is it gonna rain today? We need to do that scene now”.

33:27

E: Checking the rain alarm while everyone is inside. There are definitely sprinklers there. It’s in a lot of romantic movies. Now that we’re talking about it, the filming you did with wtFock, you sometimes had scenes outside. Here we have those (light) spots, I assume that you don’t carry them outside. How do you guys do that?

W: Sometimes we do have spots outside, but as long as the light from the sun is okay – with a binocular (telescope), well it’s not a binocular, it’s a round thing you can look through and with it they can determine the brightness of the sun and if the sun is too bright for the lightning they need, then it gets shielded, the same that is in front of your lamps. With that they can dim the lights. Or when there is not enough they use isomo plates, that’s really weird. Sometimes there are really intimate scenes in a series where it looks like it’s really close to the skin of the actors. There is a camera with a plate on it and a stick for the sound above it, it sometimes made it really hard for me to focus, because everyone is sitting there and the director and I’m like “yeah, okay okay”. So it takes a lot to get it all professional.

E: Was there a crazy moment where you forgot your lines? That you’re laying in bed and you’re like “which sentence do I have to say now?”

W: Yeah we’ve definitely had a lot of bloopers. Yeah forgetting lines or.. the thing is, as long as the director doesn’t say cut, you have to keep going. It’s a matter of "how do I improvise myself around this scene to get to the point we actually have to get to", because you have a scene and you have your lines, but if you forget something, then you do know the main lines of where the scene has to go to. You know the scene will end in a kiss or something and these subjects will be spoken about in the conversation, so when you forget your lines, you try to work your way through it as best as possible. And when the director says it wasn’t good, then we’ll do it again. I’ve had a lot of moments where I forgot my lines and I was laying in bed with Willem and we would look at each other and we’d know that I had to say something, but I was stuck, so there would be a 10 seconds silence, hoping for them to say cut. Yeah so those kinds of moments a lot or moments where I… I also had that with Déjà Vu. I remember… by the way it was amazing to work together with such big names as Natali Broods and Koen De Graeve. And Koen, lovely person, was kind of the father figure on set and we had a scene, next to the bed, a quite emotional scene. And the camera was focused on me, close up on my face. And I still remember that, the sound was going, everything, and Koen had just told a joke, or made a face that made me laugh. So, I had to laugh really hard, but I had to act very sad. It was an intense scene of goodbyes. All the time, starting to laugh about everything. I still remember for wtFock we made a video with bloopers and those are very fun to watch back.

37:03

E: Are those bloopers ever published somewhere online?

W: I don’t think so.

E: I think if you’d be able to release them somewhere that a lot of people would be interested in them.

W: Yes, yes. I don’t know why, indeed. The fans would be happy with those.

E: I think a lot of people- because we were just talking about your biggest fan.

W: My biggest-

E: Your grandma.

W: My grandma, yes. Big shout out to my grandma.

E: Do you think she’s watching right now?

W: She’ll definitely watch, I hope so.

E: What’s your grandma’s name?

W: Micheline.

E: Micheline, thank you very much for watching Micheline.

W: Micheline.

E: I appreciate it.

W: Women in power. She deserves a special place. No really, she follows all the fan accounts of wtFock. And then sometimes, or very often, we call and she gives me an update of what’s being said on the internet. Or yes, I also remember, when scenes come out and there’s things being said and she’s like "Willem, is that true, what are they saying?" And I say "Grandma, it’s nothing, it’s all from the show." "Ah okay, okay." So yes, very sweet grandma. She’s like the grandma where everything was allowed. I think that’s the same for everyone. At home, there are a lot of rules, and then you got to sleepover at your grandma’s and it was like: "Oh, I get to stay up later, and she made pudding for me." Her vanilla pudding-

E: That good?

W: Grandma, if you’re seeing this, please make some vanilla pudding when I visit.

E: Dude, everything’s falling out of my pocket.

W: You’re letting everything fall out of your pocket? Maybe you need to buy another pair of pants.

E: The chair is too comfortable that I’m kind of sinking in it, and now I constantly get-

W: The conversation’s too comfortable-

E: It’s just my phone, it’s vibrating, I think it just vibrated out of my pocket. So, silent, great. Eh, what were we talking about? About your grandma.

W: About my grandma.

38:46

E: Now, totally different subject. If you were a fish, what color fish would you be?

W: A fish?

E: Which color do you identify most with?

W: Eh.

E: And you’re a fish too of course.

W: Identify with which color. The thing is, I’m in the scouts. And in the Jins, that’s the last year before you become a leader, we were given a color totem, and the whole group decided on a color that fits you.

E: All right.

W: And mine was mango orange.

E: Wow, that’s cool.

W: Yeah, I thought it was cool too. And it means, if I have to think back, mango has quite a hard peel, relatively, but the fruit itself is quite soft. And that refers to my personality. I’m someone that lets people in fast, around me, but in the beginning, suspicion is a little strong, but kind of like, testing. Let’s say that. But once- From the outside I might look a bit hard. A lot of people say that when I have my straight face-

E: Resting bitch face.

W: That I’m angry. I was once told on the subway by a dude, and I was just listening to music, staring in the distance, and I think, suddenly a dude comes up to me, in French: "C’est quoi ton problème, heh, tu regardes come ça, c’est quoi ton problème." And I was like: "I’m sorry". Apparently, I was looking in his direction with my-

E: Bitch face.

W: Bitch face. He must have thought I was looking for problems. So yeah, that’s why the mango, a little hard on the outside, but once you get to know me better, a soft, sweet boy. So that’s why, orange. So, an orange fish then.

E: A little bit of Nemo vibes.

W: Yes, Nemo then. But let’s, what’s that theory. Did you hear that?

E: Theory?

W: About Nemo.

E: What’s the theory?

W: Haven’t you heard that? I keep seeing that online. I’m having a crisis. So the thing is, your childhood will get ruined.

E: Fuck man.

W: The thing is-

E: But there really are, no keep going, I have something I want to say afterwards.

W: The thing is, I’ve heard, that Nemo is Latin for nobody, and that the father is imagining that he still has an egg left, but that that fish doesn’t actually exist.

E: Oh fuck.

W: And that Dory joins him, and he sees, we’re actually not looking for anyone, but because he has memory issues, he constantly forgets that they’re not looking for anyone. So, they’re actually looking for nobody. And I saw that online and I was like.

E: Damn, so all the eggs are eaten, but he imagines that someone still has to be there.

W: Yes, something to keep living for.

E: Fuck man, that’s very brutal. That’s very fucked up.

W: Sorry to everyone for who Nemo is ruined now.

E: There’s a similar theory about Phineas and Ferb, and then Candice, their sister, is based on a true story about a girl that lost her brothers and still imagines that they're still doing stuff in the garden. And she keeps telling her mom: "Look, look, they are still here, they’re doing that." And that the mom says: "They’re not there." And that’s why she can never see that. You get it? Brutal right?

W: My whole childhood is ruined. Fucking hell.

E: That’s going to be the title of this podcast.

W: Childhood ruined.

E: We’re ruining your childhood.

42:17

W: We’re ruining your childhood. No but that’s good because, thankfully, I have a half-sister, but I say sister because I think half-sister is an ugly word, of seven years old. She thinks she’s 16. She’s a real diva.

E: Oh wow, okay.

W: She’s very, I’ll tell you a story later, but the thing is, I experience all those things with her again. In the beginning it was like, turning the tv on, Bumba, again. And I could secretly watch with her without feeling guilty. I was like, I’m watching Bumba and secretly I’m enjoying it, but sssh, I’m just watching it with my sister.

E: That exactly.

W: And now it’s Ketnet, like Hoodie, those series that she’s watching. And yes, I notice that because of all the technology today, she has an iPad, she’s on YouTube, she’s watching those self-made crafts.

E: 7 years old?

W: 7 years old, yes.

E: Wow.

W: She watches those- where people are playing with Barbies and they make a little play with them online on YouTube and they do stuff. Yes, a tablet. She has an iPad that’s bigger than her head. That makes me think- well, an iPad is usually bigger than everyone’s head. Or well, almost.

E: Not if you have a mini of course.

W: Her head isn’t that big.

E: Okay.

W: She’s on it a lot though. But she’s a real diva. I think the best story I have, there’s multiple. I remember the story, we were sitting at the table and she was having another moment of "I’m the princess, and everyone can leave because I do what I want and fuck you all". But the thing is, there’s five kids at home. I have a brother and two stepbrothers. So, she has four brothers, and she knows very well that she has four brothers. And that makes her feel even more like she’s the princess at home. So, we were sitting at the table. And she kept staring at my dad like this while throwing her cutlery on the ground. Like "what are you going to do". And my dad was like: "Liv," because her name is Liv by the way, "stop that."

E: That wasn’t nice of Liv. (Liv sounds the same as lief which means nice in Dutch.)

W: No. Not nice of-

E: Haha. Sorry.

W: Badam pam ts. Can’t we put that under here. Yes.

E: No, sorry, keep going.

W: So, he was like: "Liv, stop that, stop that." He started to get annoyed, because she kept going. "Liv, what is so hard to understand about no." And then it got silent at the table so I thought, okay, it’s done. The o.

E: Oh wow.

W: 7 years old and she drops that.

E: Oh wow.

W: And I thought, okay.

E: Damn bro.

W: The o. That she even dares to say that. Yeah, and she has those moments. She was sitting at the table, with her mask on, eating. So, she pulled her mask down to eat, and then she was chewing with her mask on. And then I asked: "Liv, why are you wearing your mask?" "Yes, you came back from Ghent, you’re not in my bubble."

E: Okay, okay.

W: So, then I said: "Okay, that’s fine." It’s crazy how that goes around among young children. Because my sister came back home from school crying once. And I asked her: ‘Liv, what’s wrong?’ "Yes, my friends didn’t let me play with them." So, I was like: "Why?" "Margot says I’m not allowed in her bubble."

E: Oh wow.

W: See, that’s becoming the new- we played with Pokémon cards on the playground and now it’s about playing games in bubbles because it’s so-

E: Damn.

W: Yes, you’re only allowed to have four people in your bubble so we don’t play with more than four.

E: Oh wow.

W: So I found that kind of crazy, or confronting that it made me think like, even at such a young age it has an impact. And I know that the-

E: That it leaves an impression.

W: Yes, and I know that my dad-

E: It’s sad that children have to think about it.

W: Yes, exactly.

E: Well, it’s not that- everyone should think about it of course.

W: Yes, yes, of course. It’s also that I know the way my dad feels about raising, that he tells Liv straight up about things that are happening in the world. He doesn’t make things seem nicer, or saying, eh, yes, no, but that’s- The classic story of how babies are made, with the cauliflowers, and what not.

E: I also just think-

W: How am I going to explain that to my kids?

E: If you don’t make it a taboo to start with, is it that bad? It’s just- it’s just. Oh well, that’s a whole other conversation.

W: Yes, no, definitely.

E: But straight up just telling what’s going on to your kids. I think I would prefer that to making up a story about the flowers and the bees.

W: Yes, yes.

E: Because the story about the flowers and the bees, I don’t even know how you actually- pollinating and stuff, is that what that means?

W: You do it like this, pollinating.

E: Yes, no, exactly.

W: Yes, but well, children, that’s still a long time from now.

E: Do you want kids, you think, later?

W: Yes, please.

E: Do you think you would be a good father?

W: I hope I would be a good father. Despite my parents’ divorce, I really do… I do look up to my parents. I’m proud of the way they raised me. So yeah if I would be a good father… sometimes, but maybe that’s the age, kids frustrate me. I’m a leader in the scouts for the Welpen and Welpen -great guys- but they can also be annoying and say “I’m not participating” and “that’s a stupid game, can we do something else?” and I’m like “we invest so much time in this and so much preparation, please participate” so sometimes that bothers me. But I would prefer not to have just one (child). Certainly more than one because… are you an only child?

E: No I have a little brother.

W: Yeah only child… with all due respect to people who are only children but sometimes I think… for example, I’m very happy that I have a brother. Not that it wouldn’t be fun without a brother per se, but I don’t know, the contact I have with my brother is nice.

E: The thing is, you don’t know what you’re missing so it’s hard to miss it I guess. But I do think that my brother has been a great added value to my life.

W: Yeah, yeah.

E: In the same way, I never really had grandparents. They all died before I was born and the grandfather I did have was quite old when I was actually aware that I had a grandfather. So I’ve never really had the grandparents experience that you see with family gatherings and stuff. But I don’t feel like I’ve missed anything but I still know how much other people benefit from having grandparents. Also what you just said about how often you call each other and stuff. I think that’s the same with being an only child. If you don’t have any brothers or sisters, you don’t know what it’s like to have that, what you’re missing. But if you do have it, it’s an added value I think.

W: Yes, exactly. No that’s true. My brother is very helpful to me now. I know that I can count on him.

E: Older or younger by the way?

W: Older.

E: A lot older?

W: 21.

E: 21.

W: Oh boy I had to think about how old my brother is. Embarrassing. Love you man. No but we had - maybe you had that too – but when we were younger, we really fought.

E: Physical?

W: Real fighting. Yeah, it’s has now gotten much better. I think we understand each other a lot better, but it used to be real… we had Catch WW on the Wii and we reenacted that on the couch so that was… “In the right corner Ramy Stereo” and we were bare-chested and both had one boxing glove on and fighting each other until one of us cried, bled or gave up. Usually it was me.

E: That’s just the fate of the little brother.

W: I always went… I’ve never admitted that actually, [whispers] it’s a confession. I’ve never admitted it, but afterwards I always went to my parents and cried “Kwinten hurt me”.

E: That’s really… that’s the moment, you feel it coming and you think “ah fuck no, if I hit again it’s probably over but I want to…” [cross-talk] “no no no don’t tell mom! Don’t tell mom!” I think I was a pretty nice big brother. We often did shit together. We were at home playing on the couch together and Olaf bumps into a large box that was standing there and the box, bigger than Olaf back then, fell down on his hand.

W: Oh shit.

E: So Olaf broke his hand. And I thought “I made him jump over those chairs” and then you have to say “sorry sorry don’t tell them, don’t tell them!” but yeah if your hand is fucking broken, you’re not gonna stop crying because your big brother says “don’t cry”. Yeah, that are…

W: Yes, but the relationship [between Willem and his brother] has improved. Okay we still have our discussions but... I think moments like when we’ve both been to a pub or something and we come home at the same time and we’re always hungry and standing in the kitchen making sandwiches. Those are great moments. I don’t necessarily need to have emotionally heavy of deep conversations with my brother to know that he’s there and that I can have a good time with him. So I think that’s the added value of having a brother or brothers in general.

E: Do you guys also have a specific sense of humor? Or like those moments when the two of you are laughing and your parents or people around you think “what the fuck is going on?”

W: Yeah we speak some slang to each other for fun. Like “stu stu” and [my slang knowledge is very limited so I have no idea what he’s saying here lol], those kinds of things. Typical slang from Brussels and Leuven. It’s funny because my parents are always like “why are you talking to each other like that?” and recently, I was leaving and my mom said “stu stu!” so they are adopting those words and then my brother and I can’t stop laughing.

E: Also if your mom suddenly says “are we going to chill later?” and I’m like [laughing] “what? Mom!”

W: “Okay??”

E: It’s kind of cute. Yeah it’s fun. And what are… I almost want to go deep like…

W: That’s okay.

E: Is there a particular interaction or experience you’ve had with your brother that sums up your relationship right now? Or are those the moments when you’re laughing and eating at night? It doesn’t have to be a super deep or emotional moment.

W: I think it’s an accumulation of those moments and emotional moments too. For example, after it was over with my ex. I was really down back then, it hit me pretty hard. Those are the moments when I can walk into my brother’s room in the middle of the night and he’s there for me. I know that dude is always going to be there when something’s wrong, no matter how much we argue or how much we shit at each other. I just know, and I hope he does too, that I can call him 24/7, walk into his room 24/7 and he will be there or ready to listen. I think that’s just something… the fact that we know that about each other, that creates that bond. And the thing is, if only he would do his best and go to work, earn real money… because we went on holiday together and he still hasn’t… he still has some work to do but we’ve already planned something. I’m really looking forward to it. We’re planning to go surfing in Portugal together. Those are moments I just know I can go somewhere with him and have the time of my life without-

E: …That you can remember for the rest of your life what you did together.

W: Yeah, absolutely. Those moments that I want to cherish or want to keep or experience.

E: My little brother is also just the most annoying dude on this planet who I love the most.

W: Exactly that combination. Annoying, but you love them.

E: Of course. The cameras are back on. That means we’ve been at it for over 50 minutes.

W: 50 minutes? It feels like we’re chatting for 20 minutes.

E: Exactly.

W: Pleasant.

E: That’s good. If it’s pleasant and the stress is gone.

W: Do you actually like me? “No I hate you. We’re going to finish. It has been good.”

55:29

E: No we’re not going to finish yet, but before we do, is there anything you’d like to send out into the world before we finish? On average there are 10 to 50 people watching. Is there anything you want to say to them?

W: To the 10 to 50 people?

E: Yes.

W: 10 to 50 people, you are awesome. No, what I’m saying… maybe a little deep but it doesn’t matter. Very often in your life you are going to encounter that you run into a wall, that you’re going to have setbacks, that you think “I don’t want to anymore, I can’t to this anymore, life is all one big shit show” but I think that there is a certain… at least I believe that – everyone has their own opinion of course- that a certain path has been mapped out for everyone. Not necessarily that things are set in stone but there is a road that you are going to take and that road is going to have curves, is going to have hills, is going to have valleys, is going to have everything. Maybe it’s a gravel path, maybe rocks you stumble over but -it sounds a bit stupid- put on your best walking shoes and just walk that path the best way you can. Just try to live life with complete joy and euphoria because you’re 100% worth it. No matter what other people say or think about your ideology or style or way of life. Everyone is entitled to it or should be given the opportunity to be appreciated for who they are. I think that’s something we do too little in this society, but yeah.

E: Just don’t be too hard on yourself in the end?

W: Yeah, don’t be too hard on yourself. A lot of people blame themselves too much. Or “oh I’m like that and I don’t fit in because of that” or something. Then I think: so be it.

E: Do you sometimes feel that you should do more or have achieved more at this age? Of course you’re already doing a lot of cool shit but social media, I know there is a highlight reel of all people’s achievements and that sometimes it’s very difficult to filter between what is real and how much is that person actually sitting on the couch doing nothing. Do you sometimes feel that because of social media of because of your environment or I don’t know, that you’re not doing enough?

W: Gosh, sometimes I think my life is too full.

E: Too full?

W: Not that I’m saying “oh I have so many things to do” but I’m like... I’m letting that grow organically or so.

E: Not putting too much pressure on yourself?

W: Not putting too much pressure on yourself. I’m doing a course now that I’d like to finish because I’ve had those two projects and there are friends of mine who say “why are you still studying? You’ve had your opportunity, you’re going to get new opportunities right?” and I say “hey! I’m also only 19”. Sometimes I think “fuck Willem you should have achieved more already” but I also think I’m only 19. There was a conversation at school… I really think that’s one of the added values of the course. We receive an observation report twice a year, 5 pages where the teacher writes about you and how they see you, what they think about you, what your qualities are, what you still need to work on. It’s always spot on. So strange how they can just see right through you, even though I sometimes try to hide it. Yeah, where was I going with this… we had subsequent conversation about it and I said to my teacher “sometimes I feel like I’m too young for this course” that I have too little life experience. There are people in my class who are in their 20s or older, who have already studied something else before this, have read a lot more, seen a lot more than me, a lot more experience and I think “fuck, I don’t have anything”. People talk about certain topics and I don’t follow at all. I mentioned that I felt too young and she [the teacher] said “you’re young, but that also has its advantages. Your youthfulness can actually be an interesting tool in this course and look at it from a different perspective”. So I’m convinced: don’t be too hard on yourself, don’t think “whew, I’m already 20 and I haven’t achieved anything yet” so to speak. I even saw a video recently where… “if you don’t make it in your 20s, you might make it in your 30s and if you don’t make it in your 30s, you might make it in your 40s”. There are so many… there really are a lot of people… people often forget that there are people who only find out what they want to do or discover their passion later in life.

E: And also just… I think it’s so ridiculous that you set certain goals for a certain age or something. That it’s so expected that by 18 you must have completed high school and by 25 you must have had your first job interview, by 28/30 you must have a house and a serious relationship where you’re committed to for the rest of your life and by 40 you must have already had a promotion, that you can provide for yourself and fix your pension. All those fucking predetermined milestones. I think that’s kind of bullshit, you know?

W: Absolutely.

E: If that were the case, then I should graduate in a few years so to speak while I’m clearly not studying here because I have – fuck normally I have a re-exam today. And here we are.

W: Here we are.

E: I knew I was doing this but I mean that’s just… there’s so much time. I’m 22 now and I’m doing some shit, if I go nuts now or people don’t want to listen to this podcast anymore, don’t want to see what I do online, okay then I have to look elsewhere. But I did this and I went for it and I tried. I’m 22. Even if I go nuts now and it’s all gone, I’m only 22. There are still so many ways it could go. A lot of people don’t have a job at 22. If I started looking for a new job or something now, hopefully I’ll have one by 25. Then it’s still okay because I’m only 25. I don’t know, I always find that… I could go on for a long time about this. I think those predetermined milestones/goals of things that you must have achieved by a certain age, I just think it’s bullshit.

W: I sometimes make the comparison that people too often see life as the sports world. Football players who are good until 35 and then they are done. As if you must have already performed before that age. That’s not how it works. You really have all the time and you really don’t have to stress. I also notice that many people… you mentioned re-exams. That people say “fuck I have re-exams, oh no I’m not going to pass, oh no you have extra…” chill. You do your best, but suppose you have to repeat a year, that’s not a disaster either, is it?

E: What I also think is crazy is how many people have studied law and you eventually hear that they ended up in a marketing agency because they found it much more interesting. When I talk to some people who… I was seeing a social media manager recently [laughs] “seeing”, I was talking to him.

W: “seeing” okay [laughs].

E: I was talking to him.

W: [joking] Ender has something to say.

E: And I asked “what did you study?” and he said biochemistry. “How the fuck did you end up here?” Him: “uh yeah that just wasn’t the right fit for me. I have a master’s degree but I started working here because I found it much more interesting”. I thought: why am I pretending that the degree I’m trying to get is going to determine the rest of my life, you know?

W: Absolutely.

E: If there are so many people now… because he was only 28 or something. So I thought “aah okay so you’ve been studying biochemistry for so many years and now you’re here – I don’t know if I’m talking about the correct position – but now you’re just sitting here making content. Cool. But why do I attach so much importance to that one direction I’m studying right now that doesn’t even have anything to do with media or anything. I mean I’m very interested in media, I’m studying economics. Which is also interesting, but that’s not what I see myself doing in the coming years.

W: Yeah, yeah.

E: Anyway enough about me. Do you think you could win in a fight against a cow?

W: [laughs] I really like that. You can switch to totally different shit like that. Like before you suddenly asked what color fish do you want to be. Okay. That’s nice. Win… I’ve heard if you knock over a cow it dies. That it has a heart attack then. We don’t want to kill cows okay!

E: And purely hypothetical, you’re just standing in a kind of meadow so it’s not super big so you can’t go in all directions. There is a limited domain. You come face to face with that cow and you have to begin. No weapons. You’re standing there and the cow stands there and you both know you’re going to fight.

W: It knows that too?

E: It knows that too.

W: [makes mooing noises] okay ca va.

E: It’s not a bull but it does have horns so in fact it would-

W: I would shit my pants. I’d give up already. I would lie on the ground, come on. Really crazy, I saw Jackass recently. Those guys, that Wee Man, who was in that link with the bull and he’s being catapulted, so to speak.

E: I don’t understand how those guys aren’t all dead yet.

W: Yeah they are really crazy.

E: There was also a rumor that Wee Man died from a bowling ball during… but apparently that wasn’t true.

W: I don’t know.

E: Fucked up shit. Would you win against a cow?

W: Would I win against a cow? No, I wouldn’t win against a cow. I don’t think I would win against a cow.

E: I think I would. I think just like with a bull I would try to jump out of the way like that and once you’re on the side it’s just a matter of pushing. If what you said is true, it’s game over when it’s down and you know, that’s your tactic.

W: But the thing is, a cow is heavy, isn’t it?

E: True.

W: You can’t just push it over like that, can you?

E: Sure, but it’s a matter of life or death, isn’t it? The adrenaline rush. You have to image, a cow just comes running towards you. The adrenaline that goes through your body. You shouldn’t underestimate the power you have then.

W: Just find the best patch of grass and when it’s there, sneaky knife in the back. No, now people are going to think I’m that kind of person.

E: That you’re just a snake.

W: Snake. Definitely and I admit it. No, that would be fucked up.

E: I’m going to do one more thing that’s important. I’m going to find a Twitter shout out and in the meantime, I already asked you what your message is to the world and that was a beautiful message. Got something more banal that you’d like to share? Something that you want to share from your social media or something?

W: What do you mean from social media?

E: Where they can follow you. You can say something if you have a really good video that you want to share. “Check me everywhere”.

W: No I don’t have… people should do what they feel like doing. Do you think I’m cool, do you think I’m fun, follow me on Insta. No really doesn’t matter. Doesn’t really matter.

E: Alright, I’m just going to scroll and you say stop. I’ll go back and forth and you have to say “yes that’s the one who gets to have this week’s shout out”.

W: Exciting huh. Stop.

E: [reads twitter account] M. Verschuren.

W: M. Verscheure.

E: Is that…

W: [reads quote] “If you were never sad, you wouldn’t know you could be happy”.

E: Wow. Damn bro.

W: I’m going to edit my quote.

E: “If you were never sad, you wouldn’t know you could be happy”. Wow. If you didn’t have shitty days, you wouldn’t know what the best days of your life were.

W: Exactly. But what if you get stuck in your shitty days for the rest of your life?

E: That won’t happen. That’s my biggest fear.

W: Me too.

E: Looking back at your life and thinking-

W: …Fuck I’ve never been there again.

E: …That’s where I peeked. Hope that doesn’t happen. Anyway M. Verscheure thank you very much for listening, I really appreciate it. You as well, I think?

W: Absolutely, absolutely. How much were you going to pay me?

E: 50 euro.

W: Then I’ll come… awesome. Super cool.

E: Thank you so much to everyone who listened. I appreciate it. If you want to hear more you can always subscribe to this channel. It’s also good for my ego. I’ll just put your Instagram link in the description, for people who are interested. Okay, that was it.

W: Thanks, it was fun.

E: There’s an audio only episode on Spotify every Sunday and the video comes out on Monday. That’s it. See you next Monday. Or Sunday. Peace.

#wtfock #willem de schryver

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