#i was out all day sorry for the wait LMAO

[darlingdaisyfarm]

Listen I’m going insane from how you write Stan and been rereading your spicy chatting headcanons and…. Am I too greedy if I’ll ask for sex call with him?? 🥲

when the pervy old man meets his match

tags: smut, nsfw, fem reader, phone sex, competitive dirty talk, established relationship, reader is just as much of a menace as Stan

hey honey thank you so much! here it is! it's honestly just full of dialogues lmao. sorry i wrote this in a depraved frenzy and did not look back. if there are mistakes, pretend you don’t see them. if it’s too filthy, no it’s not<3 mb I'll correct it later

your phone rings and it's midnight. a little devilish smile appears on your lips. you know exactly who it is.

“finally,” you purr, picking up. “was wondering how long it’d take for you to crack, old man.”

“tch. crack?” Stan scoffs. “sweetheart, i was givin' you a chance to call first. figured you’d get too desperate to wait.”

you smirk, rolling onto your back. ”oh, is that what you think?”

“i know it.” he laughs. “ain’t had my hands on ya in three whole days. bet you’re losin’ your goddamn mind over it.”

cocky bastard.

“hmm,” you hum in amusement. “who said i haven’t had my hands on myself instead?”

“heh, sure, doll, then you just laid there all frustrated, wishin’ it was me instead of your hand.”

“oh, no, Stan,” you interrupt innocently. “i came.” he stops breathing. “mm, and it felt so good, too, made such a mess. you would’ve loved it.”

Stanley goes silent. oh, you’ve got him now. “. . . the fuck’d you just say?”

you stretch out on the bed, imagining the look on his face. jaw tight. eyes dark. grip white-knuckling his phone.

“you heard me,” you coo. “been keeping myself nice and satisfied while you’re gone.”

a lie. a blatant, filthy lie. of course you want him. but you won’t say that. not yet.

“what’s the matter?” you murmur, teasing. “dont tell me. . . you jealous of my fingers?”

Stan lets out a harsh breath. “yeah, actually,” he growls. “bet they don’t even get the job done right and you still finish all needy and desperate, just wishin’ it was my cock instead.”

fuck. your breath hitches slightly, so tiny, but Stan hears it.

“. . . ohhh, that gotcha, huh?” his voice dips, turning low. “ya can play all confident, sweetheart, act like ya ain’t fuckin’ sufferin’ without me, like ya ain’t practically drippin’ just hearin’ my voice—“

you swallow. hard. your smile fades from your confident face

“but we both know the truth, don’t we?”

no, you don't give up. “you sound real worked up, Stanley. do you need me to take care of it for you?”

a sharp inhale from the other end. “heh,” he grits out. “you wish.”

“yeah, sounds like you’re getting all hot and bothered over there. you’re already touching yourself, huh? couldn’t help it?”

“hah,” Stan scoffs, but his voice sounds weaker now. oh, you’re winning.

“c’mon, baby,” you whisper in a honey-sweet voice. “tell me. are you hard?”

he exhales through his teeth. “maybe.”

“aw, poor Stanley, been away from me too long, huh? you must be so worked up, all desperate and aching. . .”

Stan grins. “sweetheart, i’m a grown-ass man. i ain’t desperate for anything.”

you pause long enough to make his skin prickle. then softly and slowly you say quietly “so you’re not hard right now?”

fuck. his body betrays him instantly. because, obviously he is. painfully so. has been since the second he heard your voice, if he’s being honest. but like hell is he gonna admit that to you.

“nah,” he lies too quickly.

you giggle. “liar.”

“shut up,” he mutters.

“sorry, Stanley, i cant shut up, thinking about how i’d drop to my knees for you, pull your pants down real slow, press my tongue right up against that thick cock and—”

“oh, for fuck’s sake—“

“you’d be so sensitive, all needy and throbbing for me. i could get you begging in five minutes.”

“like hell you could!”

your laugh is pure evil. “oh, really?” Stan knows that tone, he’s in trouble. “wanna prove it, old man?”

Stan grits his teeth. “you little minx,” he growls. “fine. you wanna play? we play. wanna know what i think?” your stomach tightens, you're so not ready to hear that. but it's so damn sexy when he gets like that. “i know you’re sittin’ there all wet and needy, waitin’ for me to take over.”

your breath catches as your fingers start moving faster.

“aww, see? can hear it in your breath, baby. you love lettin’ me take control, huh? love bein’ my little plaything?”

you grip the sheets.

“y’think about my cock, huh?” that bastard teases. ”you ache for it and dream about me splittin’ you open, fuckin’ you deep ‘til you cry.”

your thighs press together as you try to bring yourself to orgasm while he talks.

“tell me, baby, what’s your favorite way for me to fuck ya?”

you stop for a second, breathing. “. . .i dunno, you tell me.”

Stan groans and laughs. “that’s what i thought. you like it every way i give it to ya. you like gettin’ thrown around, pinned down, bent over. like when i take my time, when i tease, when i make you beg for it. like when i spread your legs and fuck ya slow, so deep your little cunt flutters around me, just tryin’ to suck me in.”

you let out a quiet sob, rubbing your clit harder. shit. okay. he came prepared.

“remember the last time i had ya?” fuck. he's dirty for this. “spread ya out on the kitchen table, pushed those pretty little legs open, had ya beggin' for my cock while i just tapped it against that messy little cunt.”

heat spikes through your belly. your brain melting

“and you were so fuckin’ wet, so messy for me. couldn't even hold still. had to pin ya down, keep ya in place, make ya take it nice and deep. and god, the way ya screamed when i finally gave it to ya,” he groans, pumping his twitching cock. “cried so pretty for me, took every single inch like a good fuckin’ girl.”

you exhale.

“aw, babyy,” Stan mocks. “gettin’ all squirmy over there? miss me poundin’ that tight little cunt open? miss feelin’ my cock knockin’ up against your cervix?”

oh, this bastard. he knows exactly what he’s doing. knows how to talk you into a goddamn frenzy, how to drag you through every memory, making you feel it all over again. but you won’t let him win.

“eh, big talk for a man who passed out immediately after a blowjob.”

Stan huffs.

“it's just,” you muse. “i think i might need to find someone who can actually keep up with me.”

“sweetheart,” he growls. “don't fuckin' start with me.”

you grin. “what, old man? afraid someone else could fuck me better?”

“honestly, you're such a fucking brat.” he mutters resentfully.

“and you're all alone, jerking off to the thought of me like some pathetic old pervert.”

Stan groans and that sound makes you clench around nothing.

“hehe, you stroking it, old man? pumping that fat cock real slow, thinkin’ about how tight my pussy is?”

his eyes widen. wow. . . you're too brave today. he likes that. “sweet moses,” you hear him groaning.

“tell me, baby, am i right? it's throbbing? just begging to be buried inside me?”

“fuckin’ hell,” Stan hisses. “fuck, f-fuck, shit. . .”

wide cocky smile appears on your face. oh you love this. love how you can hear the tension in his breath, imagining how he’s gripping himself too tight, trying to hold on, trying not to lose.

but he’s gonna. he’s so gonna.

“y’know what i was thinking about earlier?” you murmur.

Stan swallows. “wh-what?”

you grin. “how deep you get when you fuck me.” Stan's response is low whimper when he circles his leaking tip with his fingers. “no, seriously, you stretch me so wide, Stanley. get all the way up against my cervix, push me down into the mattress, just ruining me. i love hearing your groans when i bite your shoulder.”

his breathing is much heavier now, he's already so close.

“Stanley? you close?“

“y-you’re gonna fuckin’ regret this,” he grits out.

“what’s wrong, old man? you were all big and bad a second ago. now ya can’t even keep up? i know how bad you want it, how much you miss the way i take you so deep, so tight”

Stanley is so fucking close.

“you’re leaking, huh? and you’re still trying to hold back,” another mocking sympathy from you. “so stubborn, determined not to let me win. guess i’ll just have to break you, then. oh yeah,” you laugh when you hear another moan from him. “that gotcha, huh? i know you’d love that, you’d love me getting on top, riding you all slow and deep, keeping you right on the edge ‘till you’re begging me for it, begging me to let you cum inside of me.”

“f-fuck, baby, just. . . just like that,” his voice is shaking.

“you gonna cum, Stan? gonna make a mess all over yourself just from hearing my voice?”

“you—fuck—you little—”

suddenly his phone vibrates with a notification. you just sent him a photo.

he barely has time to open it before he sees you, spread out as you fuck yourself open on your fingers.

Stan sucks in a sharp breath. “what. . . the fuck”

“somethin’ wrong?” you coo.

silence, hes silent until you hear choked loud “oh oh oh, fuckkk” and you know he lost, so fucking hard. his orgasm hits hard, violent, brain-melting, his body tensing, groaning your name through gritted teeth. you hear the sharp inhale, the shaky breath, the low, drawn-out moan as he spills messy over his fist.

“awww, couldn’t hold out, huh?”

Stan pants, breathless. “fuck you.”

“you wish,” you smirk, giggling.

“okay okay. you won.” Stanley admits, rubbing his sweaty forehead. “you won, baby.”

“but you put up a good fight, old man!”

he groans. “hot belgian waffles, what the hell am i gonna do with you?”

“maybe bend me over the second you get home and teach me a lesson?”

Stan chuckles. “oh, sweetheart, you have no idea what you just signed up for.”

[nickeverdeen]

Hey♥️can I request a birthday request? It's for the last day of January. It's early, I know, but I'm requesting it now so you have your time to write it and don't feel pressured.

I wanted an imagine with JJ from outer Banks and a female reader (with female body parts), and it's an imagine where is JJ's birthday (the irony, since it's mine🤭) and he's coming home from some hard work where he's all tired and sweaty. He hasn't had time yet to do anything for his birthday and is content with the fact that the pogues will only be in the pool at night. So when he's coming home in that afternoon, to the small house he and reader are living together at, he's surprised to find Reader is waiting for him by the kitchen with a birthday cake she baked for him. She's holding there a cake for him, with a frost smear on her cheek, smiling at him and... For a moment, he only knows how to look. He was never a person who received much affection from anyone, he's not used to that, and then this beautiful, sweet girl he calls his girfriend spent her entire afternoon making something... For him?

So let's say he's now who surprises reader when his first reaction is to basically "attack" her on a makeout session. She's like "ew, hold on, you're sweaty" but he ignores it, because his heart is so bursting of love out of his chest he's desperate for her. Yeah, so basically a s.mut with him, but so I don't end up being too vague, maybe him giving her head on the kitchen balcony and then they f-ing against the fridge? God I'm so embarrased writing this lmao I read a kitchen s🐣x scene like that in a romance book once and never forgot😭srry

Birthday Suprise | JJ Maybank x fem!reader

Pairings: JJ Maybank x reader (romantic)

Type of fic: Smut, Bit of Fluff

Warnings: Smut

Summary: JJ is not used to any kind of special things on his birthday as it’s just another day, but after seeing what you made for him he knows he needs to thank you properly.

Ps: I hope it’s JJ in the gif - I’m not sure, but it looks like him and if it’s not please let me know. Also I’m sorry if the smut part isn’t that great as I’m not really good at writing any kind of smut with a guy.

————————

The house was quiet when JJ walked up the front steps, his muscles aching from the long day. Work had been brutal—long hours under the hot sun, drenched in sweat, and covered in salt and dirt. But he wasn’t expecting anything different. It was just another day. His birthday was just another day.

The Pogues had promised a chill night in the pool later, which was more than he usually got, so he was content with that.

What he wasn’t expecting was to walk into the kitchen and see you standing there, holding a cake.

A homemade cake.

His brain stalled.

You were leaning against the counter, waiting for him with a soft smile, a smudge of frosting on your cheek. You looked so fucking pretty, standing in his kitchen, looking at him like that.

“Happy birthday, baby,” you murmured.

For a moment, he just stared, heart hammering against his ribs. No one had ever done something like this for him. He wasn’t used to this kind of love, this kind of effort.

For him.

Something inside him snapped.

You barely had time to process before he was on you, mouth crashing against yours, hands grabbing at your waist, your hips, your face—everywhere he could touch.

You let out a surprised squeal, pressing against his chest. “JJ—you’re sweaty.”

“Don’t care,” he muttered against your lips, kissing you deeper, needier, his hands sliding up your sides. “You made me a fucking cake.”

You giggled against his mouth, squirming slightly. “Yeah, I did.”

His hands dropped to your thighs, gripping tight before effortlessly lifting you onto the kitchen counter. The cake was long forgotten.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you know that?” he murmured, kissing down your jaw, down your neck. His voice was hoarse, desperate, full of something raw and real.

You softened under him, fingers threading through his damp hair. “You deserve it.”

His breath hitched. And then he was moving lower, lips trailing down your collarbone as his hands pushed up the hem of your dress.

“JJ,” you breathed, a mix of anticipation and amusement.

He grinned against your skin. “Lemme say thank you properly, yeah?”

Before you could answer, he dropped to his knees.

His hands spread your thighs apart, pushing your panties aside. He didn’t hesitate, didn’t waste a second before licking a broad stripe up your slit, groaning as he tasted you.

“JJ—fuck,” you gasped, hands gripping the edges of the counter.

He moaned against you, the vibrations sending a shiver down your spine. His tongue worked you over relentlessly, fingers digging into your thighs, keeping you open for him.

You tried to fight it—tried not to let go too quickly—but JJ knew you. Knew how to break you down, how to drive you crazy with just his mouth. It wasn’t long before you were falling apart, back arching, legs trembling around his head.

He licked his lips, grinning up at you, eyes dark and hungry.

“God, I love you,” he murmured, standing up and kissing you again, letting you taste yourself on his tongue.

Then, in one swift movement, he spun you around, pressing you up against the fridge.

Your breath hitched.

“You good, baby?” he murmured against your ear, hands sliding under your dress, gripping your ass.

“Yes,” you breathed, grinding back against him.

“Good.”

Then he was pushing inside you, stretching you open, filling you completely.

You moaned, forehead pressing against the cool metal of the fridge.

JJ let out a choked groan, fingers digging into your hips. “Fuck—so tight,” he panted, thrusting deeper, harder.

The fridge rattled with every movement, the kitchen filled with the sound of skin against skin, your breathless moans, his ragged curses.

He was relentless, desperate, like he was trying to show you how much this meant to him without words.

And God, you felt it.

You lost track of time, lost in the pleasure, in him.

And when you both finally came undone, collapsing against each other, breathing hard, JJ let out a breathless laugh.

“Best birthday ever.”

You giggled, turning in his arms, brushing his damp hair back. “Happy birthday, baby.”

And when you giggled again, he just grinned, thinking for the hundredth time that he was the luckiest guy in the world.

[aerynwrites]

sorry I'm just spouting ideas since I have no time to write them at the moment lmao -

Warnings: Major character death, canon typical violence, hurt/no comfort, angst.

------

imagine a reader x 141 where they have basically a clairvoyent ability - they can see the future but only sometimes - but enough where they have to work to hide it.

tugging Ghost back by his tac vest rather harshly to avoid an enemy bullet from where he was hiding in a closet. moving slowly towards a new target intentionally to slow the group down and damn you arrive just a few minutes too late - just in time to watch the building you were to enter blow to bits - Gaz making a sly comment about how you picked one hell of a day to be slow. Faking an injury to force Captain Price to drag you out of the room instead of charging head first into an ambush. and soap...

You've saved your team more times than you can count, your dreams, this visions - something you once thought a curse - now a blessing as you're able to save your team over and over again. gaining the affectionate call sign - Rabbit.

you remember the day it was given to you, it was only your third mission with the team but also the third time you managed to help soap avoid a rather trick-ily hidden trip wire. after disarming it Soap had turned to you and the rest of the 141 smile wide as he grasped your shoulder firmly.

"yet another save," he says, eyes bright, "Yer like a damn rabbit's foot. lucky."

he stared at you for a moment, before price called for you all to move forward and the seargent smiles wider, takign his rilfe in hand once more.

"Let's go, rabbit."

you though that this dream would never come true, the nightmare occuring almost since you started with the team. but now...now you know it's true. The dark and damp of the tunnel is suffocating, choking you as you and the team search, flashlights bouncing harshly off the walls until you come out into a large concourse.

Price is first to spot the bomb, and it all comes rushing back to you as he all but rushes towards the apparatus.

"Price wait!" you call, follwoing him as you notice Soap do the same.

"No time!" he calls back already moving to kneel beside the large explosive, "We have to disarm it-"

His words fall on deaf ears, the blood pounding as you look all around you, eyes searching for the threat you know that's here.

you must miss it, eyes moving to fast to notice the shift in the shadows. and it's like your dream all over again - except this time your here. And when Soap's call of - Captain! - rings out in the carvernous you are already sprinting towards the pair, catching sight of the man standing over Price and Soap pulling him off.

and you see him, the one pulling a pistol, the one you know will kill Johnny. Put a bullet in his head, paint the concrete red -

NO!

you reach the man before he can grab Johnny, stopping the sickening crunch that would have occured from his broken arm and instead swing his arm out behind your friend.

the bullet goes off, but instead hits concrete instead of delicate skin and bone. You hear the sound of a struggle behind you, sounds of more bullets and fists meeting flesh. And for one second, one tiny second you let yourself get distracted, eyes flitting over to Johnny - releived to see him safe.

but a second it all it takes.

one second for the man you stopped to have you turned in his arms.

one second to have you on your knees.

one second for another bullet to go off, and this time it does meet it's target.

you don't hear Johnny's scream of your name as you fall lifelessly to the ground. Don't see the moment Gaz and Ghost enter the tunnel just as you fall, their bullets taking out the rest of the threats.

you don't see the way Johnny drops next to you, pulling your head into his lap, his tears joining the crimson streaks on your temples as Price moves to diffuse the bomb, his entire world crumbling down around him the moment you fell.

you may have been clairvoyant, but you never saw this. never saw your own death. And maybe you should have questioned it, maybe you should have wondered more. but you didn't because as long as they were safe...

that's all that mattered.

----

idk what this is lol. Just word vomit.

[motof1bfs]

abt the poster requests....can u do one with pedro acosta? I love his silly ass and I love ur work too

Pedro Acosta

In a world full of fish, you must be the shark

TY FOR THE ASK! and the compliment awe shucks .. but anyway here you go its kinda basic but alas - 🏁

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

i realized they had the same birthday (dec 21st) so i was like "yoooo i should draw them together"

silly bonus:

[blindmagdalena]

really obsessed with soulmate au’s recently and it got me thinking… what if john’s soulmate was part of the boys? a girl trying to kill him with an entire group of people also trying to kill him… and he’s fated to her? could picture him finding out and just putting his hands on his hips while turning his back to her and doing that click chuckle thing. just in utter disbelief but it is definitely on track for fate’s little play with him and his life lolol

Oohhh, you know, I've never played much with the soulmate au concept, but this struck me just right because I can so clearly see the slow, building meltdown that strikes him when that reveal drops.

The mirthless laugh, shaking his head, the hapless gesture to the ceiling before his hands drop. "Of course. Of course it's you. Why wouldn't it be? I mean—Christ, it makes sense, doesn't it? Every single person who was supposed to love me has-has fucked it, so why—" he keeps cutting into this escalating, unsettling laughter. There's nothing funny about it: you're sure that you're watching someone lose the last shred of their sanity in real time. "Why would my 'soulmate'-", he says, miming big, dramatic quotation marks. "-be any different?" That manic grin has shifted into tight baring of his teeth, a vicious sneer. He closes in on you, stands so near you can feel the heat of his breath when he hisses, "I should put you in the fucking dirt with the rest of them."

It should be terrifying, but it's hard to focus on anything other than the glassiness of his eyes. The sheer devastating heartbreak of it all, telegraphed clear as day in the way he carries himself. His eyes flare red, sizzling up the tears before they can fall. "And then you really will be all alone," you say. Maybe it's the hopelessness of the moment, maybe it's the shock of learning for yourself that he's supposed to be your one and only, but you feel numb. Frayed in a way you didn't know you could be. The crimson light of his eyes disappears in an instant, revealing surprise, followed by a wounded kind of look, before that familiar seething rage returns. "We'll see about that."

[safyresky]

Jacqueline kicking Jack's butt at Mario Kart?

WHEEZING

Scrimbly Jacqueline 51/52: Jack's off his GAME okay? It's been a VERY long night, this, this never happens, he swears—

He is a liar. Source: Jacqueline, who has not once lost double dash to Jack. She gets a lot of practise playing newer Mario Kart editions with the twins, who CREAM HER every goddamn time. But she gets her vengeance in smash >:)

Thanks for sending this one in @someheroescarryfloss! It was a fucking DELIGHT 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Mario Kart: Double Dash on GameCube is the one I played the most so it's the one I pictured lmao. Daisy's my fave character to use! So I bequeathed that to Jacqueline! Same with Toadette who is usually my second if Daisy gets yoinked (which does not happen often as my mom always plays as Toadette lol)

Dw tho! Jack will get his vengeance in the Double Dash Battle Bomb stage. He'll destroy Jacqueline! >:D!

(she lets it happen since she's kicked his ass so much during the main races >:). They've done the all cup tour like 4-5 times at this point lmao)

And a fun bonus for you:

hehehehehe >:3

[Hello tag crawlers! New to SafyreSky industries? Hi! Jacqueline's my OC. Jack's younger sister, next in line for his title. You can read all about her in Crystal Springs on ao3 and fanfiction dot net if your vibe is gen fic with heavy oc usage 😘😘]

[puhpandas]

as someone who isnt super excited for sotm for certain reasons I am really glad that like. it's clear that since ruin theyve been setting up for carnival and sotm IS carnival. so now that carnival is finally coming out, afterwards theyll be moving on to other plotlines since the main villain stuff is sorted out

I'm just rlly happy to finally see a clear direction for how the story is gonna be playing out with like "okay these games were leading up to this so after this will be open possibilites" instead of like. absolutely no info about each upcoming game and being left guessing before it releases and just having to wait and see what's in it and if anything you're looking forward to will be in it

it feels like they have a plan and a solid direction for what they're trying to do and after carnival releases thatll be all that buildup coming to fruition. & we already know from the Scott interview that theres another release 'beyond sotm' that's 'super exciting' so maybe thatll be focusing on another big currently untouched (which is basically all of them) plotline, or even the big campaign game that dawko has been calling security breach 2

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[memento-morri-writes]

So, it's been a million years since I've done any real writing, but I was toying around with potential descriptions for one of my dnd campaigns, and I'm really proud of how it turned out:

tw for graphic description of an injury

Every inch of [Rook's] back and shoulders is raw, covered in dozens, maybe hundreds, of small cuts. They overlap and merge so that his entire back is one giant wound. But you can't even get a good look at the cuts, because they are covered by a thick layer of dried blood, almost black in some places.

This will be part of the description the party gets upon seeing Rook for the first time after he was kidnapped by Captain Wolf, and dear god I can't wait to see their reactions both in and out of character. :)))

[daily-lightbulbii]

(//i don't normally do text but cw in the tags erm. i went a little off track)

[deus-ex-mona]

goodxnight guys~~~

[ronansslynch]

no cuz they rlly put jesse pinkman in a HOLE in the GROUND and those n*zi fucks YELLED at him and TORTURED (!!) and ENSLAVED (!!) him after he’d already been through hell and back like ????? the writers were genuinely so sick and twisted for that 😭

[donnyclaws]

I was gonan make a post apologizing for lack of regular art but I feel like jts already clear im sporadic and in and out of it bc chronic pain and circumstances. So for now I'm gonna hibernate, get my health steady again, deal with money issues, and art will happen when it happens.

[eskititgay]

fengqing + pork soda - glass animals

[chisungie]

.