#i was listening last night and the part about the thing with the thing about that other thing was soooo

[nezuscribe]

as somebody who was raised differently, there were certain things your sisters got than you. sure they had better tutors and trainers, but they always had the best of the best. the best dresses, shoes, friends, the best attention.

and they always got complimented. you would listen and observe, wondering if you looked or acted so inherently different from them that caused people to totally brush past you. for a while you felt like a ghost, wandering around life as people ignored you. your sisters were the light of everybody’s life, and you were just there. always in the back.

but with arranged!gojo, it’s so different.

he always finds a way to say something good about you, things you never considered before. sure he compliments your baking (a part of you wonders if it’s only because he wants more), but he tells you that your horsemanship is stellar or that your penmanship is amazing. it slips out to, as if he actually meant it.

you’ve spent your entire life believing that you weren’t remarkable. you spent years trying to mimic the way your sisters talked or acted, hoping that maybe if you were like them people would notice you. but with gojo it seems like the more you you are, the more he enjoys your company.

one day when you’re trying on some new gowns, courtesy of him of course, he happens to find you in your shared bedroom, having a little break in between his counsel meetings and training.

your eyes meet his in the mirror, widening as you turn around with a bright smile.

“satoru! you’re here! how’d you get here?” you ask, happy to have seen him in between his busy schedule. the tension in his body melts upon seeing and hearing you, eyes softening at your genuine excitement.

“i had some time to spare, decided to drop on by,” he answers nonchalantly, but you can tell with the slight blush on his cheeks that he intently came here, knowing you’d be trying on your new garments because you told him that last night.

you roll your eyes, looking back to the mirror as you survey the gown, pursing your lips. you feel him coming closer, close enough until his hands wrap around your waist and he’s staring at you staring at yourself.

“i liked those ones,” you point to the pile of gowns on the bed, “but i think i look ridiculous in those,” you point to the ones on the chair. alina offered to help you, but you promised you’d be fine. bedsides, this was something you preferred doing in your own.

“ridiculous? nonsense,” gojo snorted, his fingers tracing the beaded work on your stomach.

you lean back into his chest a little, silently looking at yourself in the mirror.

“i don’t think i look pretty in this,” you mutter, tugging at the sleeves.

“what?” gojo frowns, looking down as you and the clothing your staring heavily at, “i think it looks gorgeous on you.”

you huff, chewing on your cheek.

“i don’t know,” you murmur quietly, feeling embarrassed, “my fathers wife always said i looked worst in red.”

gojo feels his brows furrow even more.

“the old hag?” he tries to tease but there’s an underlying bite in his voice.

he’s watched you for a while now, silently. though you talk about your old life here and there, there are some things that have weighed in on you that you never voice.

he’s aware of how your fathers wife and sisters treated you. he knows you were just the spare, an extra part of the family they never liked to include. you told him once how your excludes from the family portrait that hangs tall in the foyer, or how you’ve been erased from the will. he can’t do anything but listen. and he knows he’ll never understand just how badly they treated you there, but every passing day he seems to find out more and more.

“i think you’re very pretty,” he whispers softly, kissing the side of your head as his hands squeeze your waist, his eyes catching yours in the mirror, “and i think you look beautiful in red.”

your gaze wavers from his and to the table, not used to this.

gojo sees the way you fidget with your fingers and the way your breathing hitches. he can only imagine how many times you’ve been told otherwise, forced to think the opposite.

because he wasn’t just saying it to say it. gojo truly believed you were the most beautiful person he’s ever seen. he knew it from the moment you met when you were teenagers, and he knew it now. there’s a certain beauty that you possess that everybody else lacks.

“thank you,” you say, swallowing thickly as you smile a little at him, “i think you’re very pretty too.”

gojo feels his heart clench at the quietness in your voice, the unassuming way you thanked him, not filling believing his words. and sure he’s been called all sorts of good things under the sun, but to hear the genuine kindness laced in your tone, it made him want to bottle you up and keep you everywhere he went.

his hands squeeze your wait tighter, pressing more kisses to your neck as your squirm, smiling widely at the feeling.

“you are always pretty,” he says as he turns you around, leaning your back on the drawer, “always.”

his hands rest on your hips, blue eyes searing through yours.

you duck your head a little bit, heat biting at your cheeks.

“really?” you ask, looking up at him as he sees a shine in your eyes, trying your best not to shed those tears.

gojo feels his hands tighten on your dress, the fabric snagging under him as he breathes deeply through his nose.

he wonders if this is the first time anybody’s ever told you that. he doesn’t want to know if that’s true.

“really,” he repeats, his voice caught in the back of his throat. sometimes, you find a way to reduce him down to a few words. this man who’s been trained to sway others with his speeches, and he can barely speak around you.

you smile again, bashfully, your eyes creasing and cheeks full. gojo chases after your smiles, your happiness.

because though people might’ve whispered nice things when they know you couldn’t hear, those words never reached your ears. they never drowned out the waves of things you heard around your old house or from your family. and perhaps you spent a while thinking that you were just okay, never pretty or smart or funny enough, just okay.

but gojo says it all, and he says it loud. and you lived in the quite for so long that loud is strange. but it’s new, and you think you like it.

you look down at the gown, admiring the bead and needle work. it truly was a beautiful gown.

“i think i’ll keep it,” you say after a beat, and gojo smiles, a happy smile that he only shares with you.

he leans down, pressing a soft and sweet kiss to your lips, feeling the way you melt into him, holding him close to your chest. you hope he can’t feel the sting of tears at the corners of your eyes, or hear the way your heart beats erratically.

“good,” he murmurs as he pulls away for a second, “good.”

you smile.

“good,” you say, tilting your head a bit to find his lips again.

[coryndoll]

lover of mine

drew starkey x actress!reader au

— in which drew and y/n, secretly exes, must fake date in order to keep the peace at a mutual friend’s wedding, but the forced proximity makes them question whether they ever truly moved on.

warnings: rly small scenes tbh, main focus on drew n y/ns progresssss 🤗 theyre so cuteness (i need him so bad)

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authors note: i didnt rly wna focus on the ‘day with the group’ idea bc i just wanted more reader x drew content tbh. if u still arent part of the tag list, feel free to lmk thru replies, dms, anons, or reblogs !!

there’s still a week left until the wedding, but the tension has been building like crazy. you can feel it in every interaction between leila and theo—the quiet murmurs, the shared looks, the way one of them constantly pulls out the ipad to check something, asking the other if they’ve handled this or that.

every day, it seems like there’s another task or decision weighing them down, and it’s starting to get to everyone. the carefree, beachy vibe that should have been surrounding this pre-wedding stay feels more like a weight pressing down on the entire group the longer you’re there.

the morning after, as you step into the kitchen, you find leila already there, sitting at the counter with her phone in one hand, absentmindedly twirling a strand of hair with the other. she looks up at you with tired eyes, offering a small, forced smile that doesn’t quite reach her face.

“what’s the plan for today?” you ask casually, though your mind is already racing with alternatives.

leila sighs deeply, scrolling through her phone for a moment before responding, “another beach day. at least that’s what’s on the list.”

you can see the exhaustion written all over her face, and just hearing the words beach day makes you cringe. it’s the last thing anyone needs right now. without missing a beat, you scrunch your nose, shaking your head as you push off the counter.

“yeah, we’re not doing that,” you say firmly, already turning away before leila can question you.

she raises her eyebrows, confused, but you don’t offer any further explanation. you’re on a mission now, a plan forming rapidly in your mind as you stride out of the kitchen and head toward the backyard.

if anyone needs a change of pace, it’s all of you. and if anyone can pull it off, it’s going to be you and your partner in crime.

outside, the boys are lounging around, laughing and joking about something you don’t quite catch. drew is among them, sitting on the edge of a chair, his head thrown back in laughter at whatever ridiculous story oscar is telling. but you don’t have time for the details—you need to get him on board with your plan.

drew notices you the second you step outside. his eyes flicker from the conversation with the guys to you, and without even thinking, you raise your hand, giving him a small motion to come over.

there’s no hesitation in his response—he stands up, leaving roman mid-sentence on the couch as he quietly makes his way over to you. there’s something different in the way he walks toward you now, something softer.

ever since you two made up last night, there’s been this shift—almost shy, like he’s tiptoeing around you, unsure but sweet in a way that makes your heart melt just a little.

when he reaches you, he leans forward slightly, his voice quiet, almost hesitant. "what’s goin’ on?" he asks, his eyes searching yours with that same gentleness, as if he's still figuring out how to be around you again. the shyness is adorable, and it makes your chest warm just looking at him.

“so, listen,” you begin, your tone shifting into something more determined, “leila and theo are getting way too stressed with everything. and she had another beach day planned today? no thanks. we need to do something else. something fun, and i was thinking . . . i don’t know. ziplining?”

drew freezes and stares at you like you’ve just sprouted a second head. “ziplining?”

“yeah,” you say, nodding enthusiastically now that the idea is out there. “something different, you know? something adventurous to shake everyone up and loosen them up.”

he blinks, leans forward, and crosses his arms across his chest. “ziplining,” he repeats slowly, dragging out the word like he’s trying to fully process it. “you’re insane.”

“no, i’m not!” you protest, crossing your arms. “think about it. when’s the last time any of us did something that wasn’t, like, lying around the house or stressing about wedding details?”

he shrugs, smirking. “the beach was fun. volleyball wasn’t bad.”

you roll your eyes. “the beach doesn’t count. it’s safe, predictable. this—” you gesture with your hands like you’re painting the image in the air “—this is exciting, unexpected. people will have to face their fears, step out of their comfort zones, and actually have fun.”

drew leans back, eyeing you with a mix of amusement and curiosity. “and you think ziplining is the way to do that?”

“yes,” you say firmly. then, softer, “come on, star. you can’t tell me it wouldn’t be fun. imagine leila screaming her head off halfway down the line, theo pretending he’s brave but secretly terrified, libby and oscar bickering the whole time, roman threatening to cut the rope somehow that we all genuinely get scared, i mean, it’ll be a memory!”

he lets out a low chuckle, shaking his head. “you’re crazy. but . . .” he pauses, meeting your gaze, “. . . you’re also kinda right. it would be fun.”

you grin, victorious. “so, you’ll help me?”

he sighs dramatically, running a hand through his hair. “fine. but if someone has a panic attack or refuses to go, i’m blaming you.”

“deal,” you say, reaching for your phone. “okay, we need to find a place that can take a group our size on short notice. preferably this afternoon so we can bribe everyone with dinner afterward.”

“bribe?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

“yes, bribe,” you reply matter-of-factly. “they’ll whine less if there’s food involved.”

drew seems to mull it over for a second, glancing back at the guys, who are still in their own conversation. then he turns back to you, a playful glint in his eye now. “okay, but . . . with what money?” he teases, quirking an eyebrow, clearly just messing with you.

you don’t realize it at first so you shoot him a look, half-amused, half-annoyed, and without missing a beat, you say, “i’m paying.”

he lets out a light laugh, shaking his head. “i was joking, i got it.” there’s this soft edge to his voice, like he’s trying to show you that he’s here, that he’s all in, no matter how small the gesture.

then, as if to seal the deal, he leans forward and presses a kiss to the top of your head, something that feels so natural but makes your breath catch anyway.

for the next hour, the two of you sit shoulder to shoulder, scrolling through options, debating logistics, and sharing quiet laughs when you come across reviews like, ‘this was fun, but i cried the entire time’. you’re so caught up in the planning that you don’t even realize how close you’re leaning into him until his arm brushes against yours.

when the booking is finally confirmed, you both let out a shared sigh of relief.

“we’re really doing this,” he says, looking over at you with a small, crooked smile.

“we are,” you reply, matching his grin. his eyes flicker to yours, and for a moment, there’s this feeling bubbling up inside you as you think about it—enjoying each other’s company, letting loose, and having fun. the kind of fun you’ve been craving, the kind that would remind everyone why they’re all here together in the first place.

you know it’s going to be exactly what the group needs.

you’re suddenly jolted from your daydream by something soft hitting your leg. “ow,” you hiss, even though it doesn’t hurt at all. you glance down and see a pillow lying at your feet, and you reach down to pick it up.

when you straighten up, you and drew find the boys sitting there, grinning like they’ve just pulled off the greatest prank of all time. their laughter fills the space between you, and you immediately know who the culprit is. roman, sitting back with that mischievous look on his face, the slight arch of his brow giving him away.

you narrow your eyes at him, muttering, “dick,” under your breath before tossing the pillow back onto the chair.

with a shake of your head and a half-smile, you turn and head back inside the house, leaving their laughter and drews behind. you can still feel the energy of their playful teasing lingering in the air, but it doesn't bother you.

after all, you’ve got bigger plans in mind.

the group is gathered in the living room eventually, all of them looking at you and drew like you’ve lost your minds. you stand at the front of the room, arms crossed confidently, while drew leans casually against the wall, throwing in the occasional thumbs up.

“ziplining,” leila says, her voice flat. “you want us to go ziplining?”

“yes,” you reply, smiling brightly.

“you’re insane,” theo says, echoing drew from an hour ago. “like, are you serious?” he asks, leaning forward.

“completely serious,” you say, nodding. “drew and i planned it today. we’ve got a reservation this afternoon, and afterward, dinner’s on us.”

drew, standing beside you, throws up two thumbs and adds, “it’s gonna be fun. trust us.”

gia looks hesitant. “i don’t know . . . i mean, heights? we don’t go well together. neither do me and helmets. they’re so unflattering.”

“yeah, but exactly. it’s different. it’s exciting. it’s—” you pause, looking at everyone. “—something none of us would normally do. and that’s the point. come on, libby, you’re always saying we should push ourselves, pride ourselves to go extreme. think of it as . . . wedding prep stress relief.”

she glances at oscar, who shrugs with a small smile. “what do you think?”

“i think we should do it,” oscar says. “and, c’mon, if they’re paying for dinner, how can we say no?”

gia perks up at the mention. “and you’re paying for everything?”

“everything,” drew confirms, smirking.

slowly, the group comes around to the idea, though roman continues to grumble about it as everyone heads to change into comfortable clothes. you and drew share a quick glance, both of you grinning like you’ve just pulled off the biggest surprise.

“this is gonna be great,” you whisper to him.

“you sure about that?” he teases.

“completely,” you say, and for the first time in a while, you actually feel it.

the drive to the ziplining park is filled with nervous energy. leila and libby are exchanging anxious laughs in the back seat, while theo tries to lighten the mood by joking about who’s most likely to chicken out. drew is driving, his hand resting on the center console near yours, and every now and then, he gives you a little reassuring squeeze.

when you arrive, the towering platforms and crisscrossing zip lines above are enough to make everyone pause. the guide meets your group at the entrance, going over the safety procedures and handing out harnesses. you’re already buzzing with adrenaline as you step into your gear, tightening the straps and adjusting the helmet.

“you okay?” drew asks, leaning in close as he helps you with one of the buckles.

“yeah,” you say, though your heart is pounding. “are you?”

he grins. “i was born for this.”

once everyone is suited up, the guide leads you to the first platform. it’s a steep climb, and by the time you reach the top, the nerves are palpable. gia is clutching the railing, and oscar is muttering something about how this is definitely not in his comfort zone.

“remember,” you say, turning to face the group. “this is supposed to be fun.”

“easy for you to say,” oscar mutters, earning a laugh from drew.

one by one, the guide hooks everyone up to the zip line. theo volunteers to go first, his bravado earning him cheers from leila as he zips across the line with a whoop of excitement. next is leila, who screams the entire way but laughs as soon as she lands on the other side.

when it’s your turn, drew steps up beside you. “ready?” he asks, his voice low and steady. “i’ll go right after you.”

you nod, taking a deep breath. “ready.”

the moment you step off the platform, the wind rushes past you, and the world blurs into a mix of treetops and sky. it’s exhilarating, freeing, and everything you hoped it would be. when you land on the next platform, your laughter is contagious, and drew’s whoop of excitement as he follows only adds to the thrill.

by the end of the course, everyone is buzzing with adrenaline and smiling like they haven’t in days. leila and theo are holding hands, their earlier tension forgotten, and even the others admit they had fun, though claim they’re never doing it again.

the night air is cool but not biting, the kind of perfect that makes you want to stay outside forever. the moon hangs low, casting silver streaks across the dark waves, and the stars scatter across the sky like confetti.

the whole day feels like a dream—ziplining, laughing with everyone, and the kind of dinner where no one holds back, plates piling high until you're all practically bursting at the seams. it’s a memory already cemented in the back of your mind, glowing and golden.

you and drew step out of the house hand in hand, the muffled sounds of snores and low murmurs drifting behind you. everyone else is sprawled out in food comas, barely able to move after the feast. but not you. not drew.

“leila really said we should host more,” you laugh, your voice soft but laced with pride. “can you believe that?”

drew chuckles, shaking his head. “honestly? kinda shocked she’d trust us again. but i’ll take it. today was so good.”

“better than good,” you correct, squeezing his hand. “it was perfect.”

you both step onto the sand, the grains cool beneath your feet. the horizon glows faintly, the deep blue skies blending into the inky black sea, and for a moment, neither of you says anything, just soaking in the peace.

then, you stop. you let go of drew’s hand and start slipping off your shoes.

he notices immediately. “what’re you doing now?”

you don’t answer, kicking your shoes to the side and unbuttoning your shirt, then you toss your shirt onto the sand and start unzipping your jeans. you’re already smiling to yourself, feeling a little mischievous as the cool night breeze brushes against your skin.

“are you— are you seriously—?” drew stammers, his voice pitching higher.

now fully bare, you take a slow step into the water, the chill shocking at first but refreshing as it climbs up your legs. your toes sink into the soft, wet sand, and you keep walking until the water reaches your hips.

drew stands frozen behind you, hands by his sides, his jaw slack as he watches you sway gently with the rhythm of the waves. he looks like he’s trying to figure out whether to laugh, yell, or just give up entirely.

finally, you glance over your shoulder, your hair falling loose and wild around your face. “are you coming in or what?” you ask, holding out your hand toward him.

his eyes dart from your face to your outstretched hand, and something shifts in his expression. for a second, it’s like the rest of the world disappears—the waves, the sky, the house behind him. all he can see is you, standing there in the moonlit water, your hand reaching out for him.

it hits him like a punch to the chest. he knows that he’d follow you anywhere.

he exhales a soft, shaky laugh, tugging off his shirt and stepping out of his jeans with an ease that makes you grin. the hesitation he had just moments ago evaporates as he walks toward you, the water lapping at his legs.

when he reaches you, you pull him closer, your hands sliding up around his torso as you lean in and kiss him. it’s quick, almost playful, but the smile you press into it lingers. drew’s hands find your waist, steadying you against the soft push of the waves.

“we need to do this more often,” he murmurs, his forehead resting lightly against yours.

“and we will,” you reply, your voice barely above a whisper.

he lets out a soft chuckle, pulling you closer until your bodies are pressed together, his warmth cutting through the cool water. your chin rests on his chest as you look down at the water swirling around you both, the light from the moon catching on the tiny ripples.

you tilt your head up, resting your chin against his chest, the soft thrum of his heartbeat steady beneath your skin.

“i don’t even wanna leave,” you mumble, the words slipping out without much thought, your voice quiet but heavy with feeling.

drew's hand moves up to the back of your head, his fingers threading gently through your hair, smoothing it down like he’s trying to calm not just you, but the whole world around you. “i know,” he says softly, and there’s something so steady, so sure, in the way he says it that it makes your throat tighten.

it’s not just the water, or the waves, or even drew’s warmth grounding you—it’s the wine in your system, maybe, or the weight of these last few days. how good it’s all been. how good he’s been. compared to the storm you left outside of this trip, this feels like something you could stay in forever.

a tear slips out before you can stop it, and when you look up at drew, his face comes into focus in a way that makes your chest ache.

“hey,” you whisper, your voice cracking. “i’m glad we did this. all of it. the plan, the trip— just . . . us.”

he blinks down at you, the corner of his mouth lifting in a smile, but there’s concern laced in his laughter. “stop, are you crying?” he teases gently, his hand cupping your cheek. his thumb brushes under your eye, and you feel him swipe at the streak of mascara smudging there.

you pull back a little, suddenly self-conscious, your fingers brushing over your cheeks. “oh my god, is my makeup coming off?”

you consider dunking your whole body into the water—just to rid yourself of the smudged makeup, the makeup that’s probably ruining this intimate moment. but before you can, you hear him hum a soft, “mm-mm,” his voice quiet and soothing.

he pulls you gently back toward him, his hands cupping your face with tender care. you look up at him, his eyes soft, and for a second, everything else disappears for you. his touch is like a promise that you’ll always have someone to turn to. he rubs his thumb gently beneath your eyes, sweeping away the mascara with a careful, loving gesture.

“you’re perfect,” he murmurs, the words almost like a secret shared only between the two of you, like it’s a fact he’s known forever.

your breath hitches, and for a second, the world stills.

then you lean up, and he meets you halfway, his lips pressing against yours in a kiss that feels slow and endless. his hands hold you steady, thumbs brushing over your cheeks as your arms loop tighter around his waist, pulling him closer until there’s no space left between you.

you stare at your reflection in the mirror just hours later, when you’ve managed to sober up some, and you’re brushing your teeth vigorously. the bathroom door swings open. drew steps in without knocking, already knowing you’ve been in here, and immediately begins preparing for his shower.

“you look pretty,” he murmurs as he moves past you, earning a faint smile from your lips.

you pull the toothbrush from your mouth and fill it up with water, swishing it around before spitting it out, finally managing to say, “by the way, thanks for helping me today, star.”

he shrugs, his smile softening. “it’s no problem. i care about our friends just as much as you do. leila and theo are my friends too.” he steps away, turning the water on in the shower and letting it warm up while you finish. “plus that food we had tonight, thank god they picked a good place. i’m still so stuffed.”

he rests a hand to his stomach and it makes you grin. but what catches your eye is your phone lighting up on the counter, and you eagerly check the notification. leaning against the counter, you sigh when you see it isn’t from the person you’ve hoped for. drew notices the shift in your demeanor, his brow furrowing slightly.

“okay,” he says, his tone shifting to one of concern as he walks toward you and presses his hand to the edge of the counter, watching you intently. “so something is definitely bothering you.”

and you realize you haven’t told him a single time since you’ve been talking to him again.

“it’s, um . . .” you trail off, your voice faltering as you feel the weight of your disappointment settle in. “i’ve been sending in audition tapes for the past few months and doing callbacks for in-person auditions, but i still haven’t heard back on anything yet.”

you can feel the frustration bubbling beneath the surface, and it takes all your strength not to let it spill over.

drew winces, a sympathetic look crossing his face. “that sucks,” he says, his voice low. “i know how that feels. it can be brutal.”

you nod, feeling a lump form in your throat. “i just thought this time would be different. i thought i was good enough to get at least something by now,” you say.

his hand rubs up and down your back. “it’ll come to you when the time is right,” he says softly, trying to offer comfort.

your expression drops at his sudden change in trying to be some philosopher as you put your phone back down on the counter. “that’s so full of bull,” you mutter, heading for the door to leave but drew furrows his eyebrows at the abrupt switch.

“c’mere,” he says as he reaches for your hand and tugs you back into his chest, pressing your lips to his.

you’re happily returning the kiss as his hands running down to your backside. you missed this. the kisses, the fire that grows inside you when it happens. it’s still a familiar feeling. he grips firmly, pressing you against his hips, and his kisses are passionate, his breathing heavy as he walks you backward into the sink.

he breaks the kiss to trail his lips along your neck, and into the sensitive spot beneath your ear. although you’re enjoying this, you manage to break out of your high and whisper in his ear, “you’re getting hard.”

the kisses stop there.

and he detaches himself from you, heading for the shower. “shut up,” he mutters under his breath, though there’s a slight curve of his lips as he smiles. he’s turning red. “it’s the . . . water,” he says to excuse his rosy cheeks, knowing you’ll say something about it.

you tilt your head, watching as he finishes stripping and steps into the shower, “the water’s causing that when you’ve been out here?”

“it’s the condensation, asshole.”

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a/n: if i missed u or u changed ur user, lmk to add u next time !! <3

[senseandaccountability]

"I'm me again"

Yes well this is me getting a little sappy - again - about the spirits/demon thing as a metaphor for the human experience, must be Friday. 

(Yes, this is about Solas.)

Last night my Ingellvar was tending to the graves with Emmrich and she said “demons” and immediately corrected herself, because of course she meant spirits but people outside Nevarra so easily call them demons and Emmrich, one of the kindest and most insightful people in the entire DA verse, would of course never do that. Because he sees them all as spirits. Some of them may be twisted, embittered, furious and cruel but to him they are still, at heart, the same being as their more positive virtues. You are always you, as Solas tells Cole. 

Which is also what Solas argues for all of DAI.

Which is also what Solas personal quest actively shows us in DAI.

His friend, broken and twisted by the mages' bindings, dies a spirit of Wisdom, thanking him and telling him not to be sad. “I’m me again.”

Which is also a very strong theme in Solas entire arc. 

But it’s really not just Solas, or the elves. The eternal struggle of spirits is a reflection of the human soul and what it means to be human. What parts of you does the world let you cultivate, what parts are hidden and twisted in the dark, what virtues would you be remembered for if you died tomorrow? What sort of person have you become? What person could you be? DA is crammed with these themes.

Since the spirit reveal/confirmation, I’ve seen a lot of very detailed and very cool discussions about the specifics of spirit virtues and demon characteristics and that’s some good shit right there, but you can also be lazy like me and very much just read it as various aspects of human nature interacting with each other. We’re all so many things over our lifetime, to different people, in different contexts. We all carry such endless capacity for goodness and gentleness and we’re all so very capable of hurting each other.

In the codex entries we see Solas try over and over and over again to appeal to the better nature of the Evanuris. He is described as brilliant and wise, he is pulled out of the Fade specifically for his wisdom and he tries to get them to reflect that, to listen to his concerns, to use their powers differently. Why don’t you make creatures that can protect the People, he asks Ghilan’nain. Why do you need to push your power further, he asks Elgar’nan, the people are already submitting to your rule, why must you shackle them? War may have twisted him up already but there’s nothing he says that isn’t extremely valid and wise about the Evanuris’ approach to ruling.

But as we learn from the Spirit of Command in Crestwood in DAI, wisdom is considered a soft virtue in a world of war and hierarchy and his reasoning falls flat or gets interpreted as fear or insubordination. Unheard and undervalued, his wisdom grows sour and prideful. He isn’t wrong, he knows he isn't, and he will show them. You are not gods, I will make you see that you are not gods. I will humble you until you understand that I am right. 

This is a profoundly human experience.

The ancient elven empire ultimately falls to its own greed and hierarchies and lack of boundaries - all of which Solas pointed out, all of which he and his rebels opposed. But the Evanuris didn’t listen, they were caught in a power scheme where only individual power matters and everyone else becomes pawns. How ironic then that their empire falls to its own foolish pride and boundless cruelty against the Titans, the first children of the earth. They hurt themselves by hurting them. They wound the fabric that binds them all together. 

Solas as a character is an open, ongoing conflict between "spirit" and "demon" aspects, between light and dark, between identifying as a solitary creature or part of the whole. It’s never more visible than during the final act of DAV where he is at once Solas, standing with the Shadow Dragons against the blight. And also Fen’Harel, scheming to get there in the first place, treating people in his way like dehumanized pawns to reach his final destination, a goal that can be argued to be entirely tainted with pride at this point, a way to soothe his conscience and need to be right more than it’s a way to save the world. And he’s the Dread Wolf, physically embodying the struggle against the corrupt powers since he, unlike the Evanuris, doesn’t believe in binding creatures to fight his battles. It’s significant that while he fights alone, he cannot do it without help from Rook. Elgar’nan directs all of the blight at the Dread Wolf and it takes a sacrifice from the team to free him from its grasp. It’s a battle orchestrated by a god. 

And Solas, powerful as he may be, is not a god. 

That is why it’s so lovely to me that the ending isn’t just a matter between Solas and his conscience or between Solas and Rook or Solas and Lavellan. Because we are not single entities. We are not islands. That’s why we need each other, because we respond to each other, we affect each other, we abuse and love each other and we cannot really understand in which ways until we connect. We use each other to remind us of who we are, or who we could be. Every Benevolence needs a Wisdom, every Command needs a Compassion, every one of us needs someone else in some way, shape or form. We are not meant to be solitary. We all share Solas' deepest fear of dying alone. We all share Solas’ ongoing conflict with the better and worse parts of our nature. We all reflect each other. The ending brings in the past, the present and the person that knows Solas not as a god but as a person.

We are shattered fragments of a greater whole and it was, as Morrigan points out, Solas’s love for and loyalty to his people that set him on this course long ago. And he broke the world. He broke his people. He couldn’t save them, all the horrible things that he has done and he still couldn’t save them. Ultimately and emotionally to him, this isn’t about wisdom or pride or good or evil or any such dichotomy, this is about grief and regret and broken humanity.

That is why it’s so powerful to me that a romanced or friendly Lavellan is so kind to him in DAV. They approach him carefully, they kneel down beside him to make a connection, they are understanding and compassionate and it may not be what he deserves on some grand justice scale of things, but it is without question what he needs. Pride and regret and grief need compassion, hope and benevolence much more than it needs to be proven wrong or challenged, kindness breaks the cycle.

They reach out to him not the way one would reach out to a god, but to a person. Because that’s what Solas needs to be reminded of - his humanity. That’s what their love and friendship has always reminded him of, that's what the Inquisition taught him - that the world is worth caring about because broken as it may be, it is also full of people. 

And people matter. They might not matter to the Dread Wolf, but they have always mattered to Solas.

That's what the good ending represents.

"I'm me again." 

[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

I just love this fic! Jason is so sweet, and I wanna wrap him and the reader up in a warm blanket, give them tea, and kiss their foreheads. fr, OP, your work is stunning, and I'm devouring every line!! I talk about my favorite parts below the cut!

The quiet snores echoing in the air and the soothing rise and fall of his chest against your back would usually be enough to lull you into a gentle morning sleep. But usually you can breathe out of both sides of your nose.

Plsss, I was hooked immediately by this!! The relationship building in the first sentence and just how domestic it is has me clutching my heart! And then the next line actually had me giggling. We've all been there fr

You feel a sneeze coming on and try to stifle it, to keep it locked tight in your lungs so you won’t wake the love of your life from the rare bit of peace and quiet he gets. You make no noise, but the shaking of your body stirs him anyway. Damn vigilantes and their preternatural awareness. He hums lazily as he pulls you further into his chest.

ahhh, they're precious!! I know he's an unfairly light sleeper, and you couldn't get away with a thing.

“Then why do you sound like the Swedish Chef from the Muppets?”

WHEEZING!! He's gonna hit, and that's what happens when you mess around with someone when they're already sick 😤

You push yourself out of his arms and make it as far as the edge of the bed before he’s pulling you back to him again. “Aw, c’mon, ma. Don’t be mad. You are sick. Just admit it,” he says, voice kind as he runs his hand up and down your spine.

... he's forgiven, that's adorable, and I'm weak for pet names

He just squeezes you back, then manhandles your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. He rises from your bed like you weigh nothing to him, hefting you into the air so that you’re better positioned.

Jason Todd carrying people supremacy. I'm swooning over here!

You can see it in the fact that everything he needed for this was already in your kitchen, in the fact that none of it was there when you fell asleep last night while he was on patrol. Jason cares. He cares from the tip of the stubborn curl that sticks up on the top of his head to the soles of his feet that guide you in a slow waltz around the kitchen.

AHH! THIS!!! Jason Todd and slow dancing in the kitchen is my WEAKNESS!! And he cares so much!! Yes, yes, and yes, this is sooo him! Actually, I'm going insane over this paragraph! Just, yes, I looove the line about the curl of his hair to the soles of his feet, it's just so picturesque. 10/10 has my whole attention. 💙

You nod your head that’s tucked against his chest, sniffling as you feel your nose start to run. Without missing a beat, Jason pulls a tissue from the pocket of his pajama pants and hands it to you.

The sigh I just let out was soooo dreamy

He goes rigid momentarily before he relaxes against you. Then a soft smile breaks out on his face. He chuckles and shakes his head, turning his face away from you. But you can be observant too. You don’t miss the way pink dusts his cheeks and, oh, he looks so pretty like this.

Jason Todd is a pretty boy and I will never keep quiet on that fact!!

Jason reads the new book he was telling you about as you listen to music, dozing in and out of consciousness. It’s not your fault he makes such a great pillow; his large body is warm and soft as he lies relaxed on your sofa. Every now and then, especially when he thinks you’ve fallen into a light sleep, he’ll place a featherlight kiss on the top of your head.

SWOONING! Cuddling with him on the couch is just chef's kiss

Carrying you out of bed, making you soup, letting you rest on him, the soft kisses and touches he flutters over your skin; it’s all his way of saying he loves you when the words themselves are simply too much or not enough.

ugh, yes! Sometimes words aren't enough to get the feelings across, but he shows them with every action and look, and I love him, your honor

And maybe it’s the homemade soup settled in your belly, or the afternoon sunlight shining through the window, or the warmth of the man you love beneath you, but you soon find yourself lulled into a peaceful sleep that feels just like home.

This is the sweetest, omg, I feel like I just ate my favorite candy. Seriously, OP, I'm eating up your work!! It's fantastic, and I'm enthralled! 💙💙

darling, won’t you take me home?

jason todd x fem!reader

word count: 1.2k

warnings: reader has a mild cold, but nothing much else (lmk if I missed anything)

a/n: this is just a lighthearted sick fic that got real prose-y at the end bc I was listening to my Jason playlist and got all in my feelings while drowsy off cold medicine. again, i give thee my wares.

divider credit: saradika-graphics

You wake to soft light filtering in through the white curtains of your bedroom and the warm weight of your lover’s arm across your waist. The quiet snores echoing in the air and the soothing rise and fall of his chest against your back would usually be enough to lull you into a gentle morning sleep. But usually you can breathe out of both sides of your nose. And you usually don’t feel like there’s sandpaper in your throat. And your body doesn’t usually feel this heavy.

Goddamn it–you’re sick.

You feel a sneeze coming on and try to stifle it, to keep it locked tight in your lungs so you won’t wake the love of your life from the rare bit of peace and quiet he gets. You make no noise, but the shaking of your body stirs him anyway. Damn vigilantes and their preternatural awareness. He hums lazily as he pulls you further into his chest. You think he might be able to doze back off and you’re glad for it. Then your hopes are dashed. One, two, three sneezes wrack your body in succession and you are finally forced to admit defeat.

“Are you sneezing?” Jason asks, groggy but inquiring.

“…no.”

You don’t even know why you tried to lie to him. You’re a bad liar in most cases, and an absolutely abysmal liar when it comes to Jason. He simply sighs and you’d bet twenty dollars that he’s rolling those pretty seafoam eyes of his. He easily turns you in his arms so that you’re facing him. Great, now you really won’t be able to lie to him.

“I told ya that you were gettin’ sick,” he scolds gently.

“‘M not sick!”

He did. And you are.

“Then why do you sound like the Swedish Chef from the Muppets?”

“Oh, fuck you!”

He tries to keep his face serious, but soon the facade cracks and he lets out a deep belly laugh as you glare at him. You push yourself out of his arms and make it as far as the edge of the bed before he’s pulling you back to him again.

“Aw, c’mon, ma. Don’t be mad. You are sick. Just admit it,” he says, voice kind as he runs his hand up and down your spine.

“Okay. Fine. Whatever,” you mumble, your words trailing off unintelligibly.

Jason doesn’t miss it. He never does. Fucking vigilantes and their fine tuned hearing.

“What was that?” he smirks.

You whisper it again, quiet as a mouse. He shakes his head. You smack him in the chest.

“Ah ah, I wanna hear it,” he laughs.

“I said you were right! There! You happy now?” you pout, burying your head in his chest.

You can feel the giggles travel through his body and find it impossible to fight the smile it brings to your face, even if your head feels foggier than Gotham after a heavy rain. You squeeze him tight, a sudden aggressive love for him that you just need to let out. It does nothing to his strong frame. He just squeezes you back, then manhandles your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. He rises from your bed like you weigh nothing to him, hefting you into the air so that you’re better positioned.

“C’mon, we’re makin’ soup.”

One thing about Jason Todd is that he’s an amazing cook. He didn’t cook much for himself before he met you. He’s told you he didn’t see any point when cheap takeout would fuel his body just fine for whatever fight was inevitably coming for him. But now he has both the reason and the time to care. And he cares. So much.

You can see it in the way he sets the chicken to bake while he tells you about the new book he got from the bookstore down the block. You can see it in the way his skilled hands, calloused and bruised, slice the carrots razor thin because he knows you hate the crunch of them. You can see it in the barely noticeable look of pride on his face as all the ingredients simmer in the big metal pot, giving your shared home a warm aroma of comfort. You can see it in the fact that everything he needed for this was already in your kitchen, in the fact that none of it was there when you fell asleep last night while he was on patrol. Jason cares. He cares from the tip of the stubborn curl that sticks up on the top of his head to the soles of his feet that guide you in a slow waltz around the kitchen.

“I know you probably aren’t too hungry, but I need you to try to eat at least one bowl for me,” he says in his gentlest negotiation voice as he puts a bowl of chicken noodle soup on the counter.

You nod your head that’s tucked against his chest, sniffling as you feel your nose start to run. Without missing a beat, Jason pulls a tissue from the pocket of his pajama pants and hands it to you.

“And you’re takin’ cold medicine the second you get some food in you.”

He’s not asking anymore, just stating facts.

“Gonna stay up all night watching me too?” you ask teasingly.

“I might,” he retorts.

“I love you too, Jay.”

He goes rigid momentarily before he relaxes against you. Then a soft smile breaks out on his face. He chuckles and shakes his head, turning his face away from you. But you can be observant too. You don’t miss the way pink dusts his cheeks and, oh, he looks so pretty like this. You tell him as much just to watch the soft pink turn to vibrant red.

“Shut up and eat your soup.”

One bowl of soup and a disgusting shot of cold medicine later, you find yourself wrapped in the arms of your lover as you both lounge on the couch. Jason reads the new book he was telling you about as you listen to music, dozing in and out of consciousness. It’s not your fault he makes such a great pillow; his large body is warm and soft as he lies relaxed on your sofa. Every now and then, especially when he thinks you’ve fallen into a light sleep, he’ll place a featherlight kiss on the top of your head.

You may not be a vigilante or The World’s Greatest Detective, but you can put all the pieces of the day together well enough. Carrying you out of bed, making you soup, letting you rest on him, the soft kisses and touches he flutters over your skin; it’s all his way of saying he loves you when the words themselves are simply too much or not enough. But the words are enough for you. You swear that you’ll go to your grave finding all the prettiest ways to tell him just how much you love him. Because you do.

And maybe it’s the homemade soup settled in your belly, or the afternoon sunlight shining through the window, or the warmth of the man you love beneath you, but you soon find yourself lulled into a peaceful sleep that feels just like home.

[softspokendove]

It was me

pairings: bsf!matt sturniolo x female!reader

summary: after your one night stand with ghost face, you can’t seem to forget that night. you confide in your best friend about your experience and how it’s been driving you crazy, all for you to find out he was the mystery man.

warnings: SMUT (who would’ve thought), knife play, slapping, p in v unprotected, degrading, rough kinda, pet names (sweetheart, baby, etc), name calling (slut, whore, etc), biting, multiple orgasms, crazy matt kinda, fingering, little blowjob f!receiving.

Important note: this is a part two, part one is posted before this one it’s called “ghostface matt”. I do recommend reading that one before this one since it has important “plot”. I’m sorry I don’t know how to link it :(

“Are you listening to me?”

you try to rack your brain for anything that Matt has said to you in the past 10 minutes but nothing comes to mind. You’ve been too busy inside your own head replaying previous events of the party last weekend. The more you think about it, the more you can feel his hands back on you again making you subconsciously squeeze your thighs together on Matt’s bed.

You look at Matt and he has an agitated look on his face. He’s been ranting to you for the past 20 minutes trying to get your opinion on the new video idea his brothers have, he doesn’t think they should do it and he wants you to back him up on it.

You quickly nod your head trying to be convincing, “yes I’m listening.”

Matt raises his eyebrows challenging you while he crosses his arms, “okay then what did I just say?”

You don’t even think before answering, “you asked if I was listening.” A sarcastic smile written all over your face.

“Very funny.” Matt blows air out of his mouth and walks over to sit beside you. His back now rested against the headboard, you sitting criss cross while facing him. “So what’s got you in a pickle?”

You snicker a bit at his choice of words, “a pickle?” He just shrugs, not a hint of humor shown on his face. You can tell by the look he’s giving you that he expects you to answer him truthfully. You feel your face grow a tad bit warmer as you think back to what you were previously day dreaming about.

You’ve told Matt before about your past sexual experiences and he’s told you his, it was a normal thing that was brought up time to time. But this time it was different. It felt different. You truly felt like that was your best sexual experience of your life and saying it out loud to your best friend didn’t sound appealing.

“I was just thinking about the party last weekend.” It’s not a lie, more like a half truth. You could be okay with that.

“Oh? What about it?” You feel your stomach twist and try to think of something to say other than the truth. You see a small glint appear in his eyes as he adjusts himself, getting more comfy.

“Nothing. It was just fun.” You copy Matt’s movements and adjust yourself a bit too, trying to look unsuspicious. But Matt can see right through you.

He squints his eyes and tilts his head, “c’mon it’s me, you can tell me anything.” You appreciate his words but it doesn’t help with the racing of your heart or the small patch of heat beginning to pool lower and lower. You don’t trust yourself to answer him, to concerned that your voice might wobble, instead you just lower your head and stare at your lap.

Matt knows this move all too well. When you’re too embarrassed or shy to answer someone you avoid any and all eye contact. “What did something happen?” You feel bad ignoring him so you shrug your shoulders as a response. A few more seconds go by, “Did you sleep with somebody?” Matt sees you visibly stiffen and he lets a small smile slip.

He finds it adorable how open you usually are about your sex life, but you can’t stop getting flustered everytime he’s asked you about the party. He’s been prying at you all week to get your side on what happened. To his luck all he got was you either avoiding his questions or changing the topic. He’s not letting you slip away this time.

“What is that it?” You slowly pull your head up your eyes finally meeting Matt’s deep blue ones. A small ‘yeah’ escapes your mouth. “Was it that bad?”

You shake your head, “no it was good.”

Matt’s small smile grows, “How good?”

Your eyes widen in surprise at his constant pestering questions. He’s not usually this interested in sex. “Really good. Like the best I’ve ever had.” You mumble the last bit but Matt heard you perfectly. Matt feels his heart swell up in pride. He made you feel so good, more than any other man has. He knew you were made for him and this is just more proof.

“Soo do you know who the guy is?”

You furrow your eyebrows in confusion at Matt’s question. How’d he know there was a mystery guy. For all he should know is that you just had a one night stand. He couldn’t know that even you didn’t know who it was.

Unless.

Unless he was there. Or someone told him. Like the mystery man himself. No, if you knew who was under the ghost face mask you would’ve known right? I mean you must have felt that you knew the person. But then again you carelessly let that man use you practically, it’d be worse if you didn’t know him and let a stranger do that. Right?

Matt can almost see the wheels turning in your head. Your eyes are rapidly looking all around his face as your poor little brain tries to figure out how he knew. To be honest he wasn’t going to tell you. He wanted to see if he could run into you again as ghost face and see how’d you react.

He loved it. He loved seeing your pretty face all flustered and in bliss as his cock worked your wet pussy. He came home and jerked himself off before bed, replaying the whole scene again so it was fresh in his mind. He’s had so many boners this week alone. Every time he’d cum it’d be to you, your name effortlessly rolling off his tongue. He’s had to stay in his room for most the week so his brothers can’t see the state that he’s in.

He’s addicted and it’s bad.

All he wants is you. All he can think about is you. When you walked into his room earlier for your usual movie night all he wanted to do was practically pounce on you. To kiss you, feel you, hear your beautiful moans again. He can’t stop himself.

So is he upset that the mystery man won’t be much of a mystery to you anymore? A little. Is his cock straining so hard against his pajama pants that it feels like he might explode? Yes. And that is all he needs for him to lose track of his other plan and just let you figure it out.

“How’d you know I didn’t know who it was?” Matt’s whole demeanor has changed now. His legs are spread more apart. His pupils are dark and blown. His hair is sitting messily on his head. One hand is rested on his thigh while the other one fiddles with his pajama pants string. He just gives you a one shoulder shrug, trying to let you do all the work.

“Matt how did you know?” This time you sit up on your knees and give Matt the most serious face you can manage while you’re freaking out on the inside.

He doesn’t answer. Of course not. He knew he had to give you something to lead you to the right idea. But what would be the fun in saying it? No he’d show you. See that pretty shocked face again.

Matt ignores you and instead gets up walking over to his closet. He bends down to pick something up and then walks to the bathroom, careful not to show you what he has in his hands.

What is wrong with him? He’s been acting strange all week and this is just the cherry on top. You get up and stomp over to the bathroom door. “Matt!” You go to raise your hand up and knock on the door, right then Matt whips open the door.

Matt smirks as he sees your face, your eyes wide and mouth open ajar as your eyes take him in. He’s wearing the same pj pants as before but his sweater is now gone leaving him shirtless, his arm covered in tattoos on full display. As your eyes go up you feel your oxygen get knocked out of your lungs and your legs feel wobbly.

He’s wearing the mask. The same one from the party.

It couldn’t have been him. No it can’t. He was at home that day, he didn’t want to go. Besides he’s your best friend he wouldn’t want to sleep with you.

You want to believe that you truly do, until your eyes land on an object in Matt’s hand. A knife. The exact same knife from the party. That can’t be a coincidence. Oh my god you fucked your best friend.

“Wh-Matt? It was you at the party?”

“Surprise.” His voice isn’t his anymore. It’s the same voice from all the movies and the same voice you let turn you on while having sex with him. His hands are now those same hands that you can’t stop thinking about. His cock is now the same one you’ve been needing back inside of you.

This is wrong. You slept with your best friend and you loved every second of it. You’ve been day dreaming about getting another chance with that guy and now you finally have it.

As you begin to put two and two together you clench your thighs together, you can already feel your slick sticking to your folds. Matt notices this and starts stalking towards you. This makes you back up, not yet sure if you should be doing this. This all stops when the back of your knees hit his bed, leaving you pinned between them two.

“Don’t you want it? I know I do.” Your stomach churns at Matt saying the same thing you said to him last time, giving one last confirmation that this is the man. He doesn’t let you answer, instead he pushes you backwards, letting you softly hit his bed. His fingers slip past your waistband and pull your shorts down. A dark spot on your panties giving him all the confirmation he needs to continue.

He backs away from you, walking towards the door, shutting and locking it. Now it’s just you and him, and he’s never letting you go. You’re his. He’ll show you that.

“Did you miss me?” Matt tilts his head to the side and slowly walks back over to you, admiring how puzzled and adorable your face still looks. He runs a hand down your cheek before giving it a light slap, not enough to hurt you but enough to regain your attention. “I said did you miss me?”

You feel another wave of wetness at the familiar dominance from the man above you. You want nothing but to feel his hands back on you. To cum on his cock again. To be able to scream his name now that you know he’s your best friend. You give in and nod your head, “yes Matt.”

Matt groans at the sound of your whiny voice saying his name. God he’s waited so long to hear that. He quickly lifts up his mask and doesn’t waste anytime before connecting his lips to yours. Your lips are so soft and taste so good. His hand is still rested against your cheek as his other hand runs the knife down your body. Goosebumps erupt from all across your skin as you feel a shiver run down your back.

Matt is relentless with attacking your mouth. You start needing oxygen and go to open your mouth. He feels you open your mouth slightly and he takes it as an opportunity to slide in his tongue. His grip tightens on your face and he forces you to tilt your head to give him better access. You both moan at the new feeling of your tongues sliding against one another. The sensation was short lived as you both pull away gasping for air.

Matt starts attacking your neck, kissing all over your soft skin. He then starts sucking and biting, leaving marks all over. As he gets lower he gets cut off by your shirt, grunting he pulls away to slip it off of you and then continues. He reaches your tits and takes one of your nipples into his mouth, moving his tongue in a circular motion as he sucks.

You arch your back into his mouth and let out a moan. Matt can’t help but smile against your nipple at the noise, something he’s been longing to hear again. He lets go of the nipple with a pop and moves on to the other one, giving the same attention to it.

You begin to grow needier and the lust filled pit in your stomach isn’t doing much to help. You start squirming under the man and let out a pathetic whine, “Matt.”

He lets go of your tits and moves lower, his kisses getting lower and lower to where you desperately need him. He moves two of his fingers against your drenched panties, the slight pressure on your pussy causing you to gasp.

“Always so wet for me.” He moves your panties to the side and lets his fingers finally come in contact with your cunt. He gathers up some of your slick before inserting a finger into you. You moan at the sudden intrusion and let your head fall back against the bed, enjoying your best friend playing with you.

Matt feels his cock twitch at how tight you are. You’re perfectly sprawled out for him, your legs open wide to give him all the room he needs. He can see how beautiful you are when you’re so open like this. Can see your cunt clinging to his finger and sucking him back in as he motions his finger in and out. He leans down and applies a light kiss to your clit. This makes your head start to spin.

Matt wants nothing more than to insert his tongue inside of you and suck on that pretty little clit, but with seeing you subconsciously start rocking your hips to his movement he knows your not gonna last very long. That’s okay he’ll make you ride him later as a midnight snack.

He can feel your pussy start to relax a bit more against him so he inserts another figure. This time he curls them, hitting that spot deep inside you that makes you let out a high pitched moan.

“Shh baby, I wanna hear you, but you have to be quiet. Don’t want anyone hearing how much of a slut you are do you?”

Without thinking you let out a no and continue to rock your hips. Your movements are on key to his, letting him hit deep inside you with the tip of his digits. You bite your lip to hold in your moans at the intense feeling.

Matt kisses your inner left thigh, opening his mouth and biting down on your flesh. You squeal at the surprising pain. The pain of the bite and the pleasure of his fingers leads you to reach closer and closer to your peak.

Matt kisses the bite mark, soothing the pain. He feels your juices drip down his hand and onto the floor. He knows you’re close when he feels your walls start pulsating against him. He licks strips up and down your clit pulling you closer and closer to the brink.

“Look at me.” You’re too much in a mind fog to listen to him. All you can think about is how good he’s making you feel and how you really wanna cum. A gasp soon escapes past your lips at the feeling of a slap coming down onto your right thigh.

“I said look at me. I wanna see my pretty girls face when she cums.” You reluctantly lift your head up and meet his masked face. His mask is still covering his top face as he works on your cunt. You notice his knife is nowhere to be seen as his empty hand soothes your skin.

The pressure gets more intense as his motions continue. You let out small moans as your come close to your brink. All that keeps repeating in your head is Matt. His fingers inside of you. His tongue working hard on your clit. Your best friend making you feel the best you’ve ever felt.

Your hand reaches down towards his empty one and intertwines itself with his. You grip his hand tightly trying to ground yourself as you finally snap. The pressure soon turned into absolute bliss. Your cum soaking his hand. Loud moans leaving your mouth.

Matt can’t even be mad at you disobeying him. You looked so good while cumming. Your walls wrapped tightly around his digits as your juices seek out around them. He slowly slides his fingers out of you causing you to whimper in protest, he takes them into his mouth, swirling his tongue around his digits and groaning at the taste of you. “God you always taste so good.”

You feel yourself getting wet again at the view of Matt sucking his fingers moaning in delight at how good you taste. You buck your hips up towards Matt's hand wanting more, "please Matt."

"Always so needy baby." He avoids meeting your hips and instead stands up, sliding down his pajama pants and his boxers follow suite. His cock springs free making him sigh in relief. The veins of his cock are throbbing as his cock twitches staring at you. The reality finally hits him that he's about to have sex with you, his best friend. He can't believe it, but he also loves it.

"Turn around for me." You obey him and turn around now on your hands and knees. You feel the bed dip behind you and Matt puts his body against yours. He puts his hand on your lower back and pushes, forcing your upper body to lay flat against the bed, leaving your ass sticking up in the air ready for his cock.

Matt takes his cock and plays with your pussy teasing you. He slides himself repeatedly through your folds hitting your sensitive clit causing you to jump. He pulls you back towards him and slaps your ass, "stay still." He adjusts his cock to your entrance and slowly pushes himself in making you whine, "ah fuck."

He shoves in his full length making you feel so full again. Your walls spasm around his cock getting used to his size. Matt lets out a few groans, "You're so tight sweetheart." He starts to slowly slide out, almost removing his whole cock from your sobbing tight cunt, then he roughly slams himself back in. The tip of his dick hitting your cervix causing you to accidentally let out a loud moan, this earns you another harsh smack to your ass cheek. "Be quiet."

Matt starts pulling his hips back then roughly slamming them back in continuously, his pace slow but hard. The slow drag of dick having a big effect on you. You feel so good, all you can think about is Matt's cock. You grab a fistful of the bed sheets and tighten your hold on it as Matt keeps thrusting into you.

His bed starts to move and hit the wall along with his thrusts, causing him to groan in frustration. His hands grip your hips tightly, almost leaving marks as he pushes and pulls your body to match his pace. Basically using you as if you were a toy. You get caught up in the bliss of his cock that you let out a few small moan, still holding back the big ones.

Your cunt starts to leak out more liquid, it mixes with Matt's movements causing the room to get filled with the wet noises of you. This pushes Matt further, the fact that you get so turned on for him and only him. Only he can make you feel this good. He is the only one that can see and touch you like this, he'll make sure of it.

He increases his pace making you have a harder time of concealing your loud noises. Matt grabs both of your wrists and pulls them behind your back, holding them with one hand. He then pulls on those which forces you backwards, your back against his chest.

"I thought I told you to be quiet? Guess I'll just have to do it myself." His other hand that's on your hip moves and cups around your mouth. Your moans now getting muffled. Knowing that noise isn't much of a problem anymore, Matt increases the pace even more. The pressure in your lower stomach now returns as you practically scream into his hand.

Matt's hips constantly rutting into yours, his cock smoothly sliding in and out of you thanks to how wet you are for him. He feels your walls start to slowly clamp down around him, signaling that your getting close. "You gonna cum?" You moan back as an answer and nod your head. Matt feels himself getting closer as well, his cock gives a small twitch here and there while inside of you. He tilts his hips at a certain angle to hit just the right spot, making you scream into his palm.

"Cum around my cock. Show me how much of a whore you are for me and maybe I'll cum inside of you." Your eyes roll back inside your head at his words. You move your hips on your own accord and meet with his. You hear Matt's moans and grunts as his mouth is beside your ear. You roll your head backwards against Matt's shoulder, which he takes advantage of and bites down on your exposed neck trying to muffle his noises as he reaches his peak.

You let out a squeal at the bliss of the pain mixing with the pleasure of your best friend's dick forcing you over the edge. The pressure once again snapping and your cunt pulsating as you squirt all over Matt and his bed.

Matt realizing that he just made you squirt sends him over the brink, he lets go of your neck and groans out your name, his cum shooting out of his tip and inside of you. You whimper at finally feeling his cum fill and warm you up.

Matt lets you go to which you collapse onto the bed and sigh out in exhaustion. He watches as his cum and your cum slowly seep of your cunt. His cock twitching again at the sight, wanting more of you. He pushes it down and goes to put his boxers back on. He unlocks the door disappearing into the hallway and returns without the mask but with a wash rag to clean up the mess.

You hiss at the sensitivity which Matt apologizes for. He puts the rag on the floor to soak up that liquid, making a mental note to change his bed sheets later. He climbs into bed beside you and reaches over, pulling your body onto his. You feel yourself start to fall asleep as he plays with your hair. Before you fall into the darkness of sleep you hear Matt one last time, "You are mine."

a/n: sorry this took so long for me to post, I've been busy with work and I've been HORRIBLY sick. Hopefully I'll start posting more now and I hope you enjoyed!

tags: @hesvoid34 @sturnl0ve @princesspeachthefroggy @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut

[therealmylesmorales]

Loser!Vi Headcannons pt 2

Y’all gave so much love, I feel like I had to reward you guys ☺️

Warnings: uhhh same as last time, I guess. I’m too lazy to check what it was, masc4masc relationship

WC: 700

⭒ Vi is a chronic biter. You learned that pretty early in your relationship. And yet, you never know when it’s coming until it’s too late. She would act like she would be leaning in for a kiss…until she bit the closest part of your body; your cheeks, your arm, your ass

“OW— fuck Vi!”

”That didn’t hurt, you're being dramatic.”

⭒ Another cute but annoying thing Vi does is that she fake boxes you. Her fists will never come in contact with your face or body but she still finds it funny. She’ll even make sound effects while doing so. But the second you lightly punch her stomach to get her to stop, it’s the end of the world.

⭒ She cried like a baby when she got her nose pierced. You were with her and by how hard she clutched your hand, you would’ve thought she got shot. You made fun of her the entire time.

”Not only do you have a big ass back tattoo, you also have one on your face.”

“That’s DIFFERENT!”

⭒ Vi’s major changes every few months. She just loves doing new things and will get obsessed with it and unfortunately be bored with it in not too long after. However, she would probably get a degree in business so she could take over Vander’s bar once he decided to retire.

⭒ Sticking with the college theme for a second; you’re known around campus for being chill and somewhat friendly to others. Vi, on the other hand…people think she’s brash and her temper definitely doesn’t help. But people have noticed that when she’s around you, she’ll siphon off your energy and is a lot more pleasant to be around.

⭒ Vi likes kissing you more than actual sex. She’ll still never turn down the offer, but kissing you feels calming to her. After a day of classes or dealing with whatever, it is her favorite way to unwind.

⭒ Vi loves horror movies, and loves when you watch them with her (even if you hate them/are scared easily). Her favorite franchise is probably Friday the 13th but Ghostface is her favorite slasher. The only problem with her watching horror movies is her inability to easily fall asleep afterwards. Normally, it takes her five minutes to be knocked out.

”Cupcake, are you awake?”

”Vi, PLEASE go to sleep.”

⭒ Surprise to no one, she cuts her hair on her own. Every few weeks you’ll find her in the bathroom with scissors and a shaver in hand, trying her best to get her hair looking good. You help her with the back of her head and she appreciates you for that.

⭒ Vi is literally obsessed with you. Her entire camera roll is filled with pictures of you both or just you; pictures she took on dates or just candid ones. Her wallpaper is even one of you, a rare selfie you took and she cherished it as soon as you sent it. Vi even gave you a special ringtone and whenever you text or call her, she can’t help but kick her feet.

⭒ Like everyone, Vi has red flags. But her most noticeable one is that she’s hardheaded. She doesn’t like to listen, especially when she knows thinks she’s right. She will stand on business until she can’t…and when that happens, she’ll come back with her tail between her legs, hoping you’re not too mad at her.

“Hey…are you mad at me?”

”Did you learn your lesson?”

”I did. I’m sorry.”

A little something extra for my black!readers 🫶🏾

⭒ No matter how hard both you and Mel tried to teach her, she nor Jayce still understand Spades. Viktor got it down within thirty minutes, but those two were still clueless. So, you all decided on a more easier game, Uno!

Uno was banned that same night after you two almost broke up and she and Jayce almost got into a fist fight.

⭒ And someone said that Vi would take the fuchsia bonnet with the black headband, and that was totally the one I was talking about (cause I have the same one). She refused to give it back at that point so the only logical solution was to buy another.

[s3renascorner]

Have you ever tried this one?

MDNI!!

Noah Sebastian x fem!reader

Warnings!: oral (f receiving) p in v (don't be like them and use protection!) Pet names, cursing, mentions of being tipsy. I think that's it.

Not proofread! so sorry for shitty grammar.

You

"Noah are you finally ready!?" You yelled from your room to your roommate and best friend. You heard heavy footsteps approach your room as Noah walked towards your room, he stops right at your front door and says "damn can't you be a little more patient? I was just finishing up" you quickly grab your purse and put on your shoes, you open up the door revealing yourself to Noah. "no Noah I can't be, we have to be there early so we can get merch remember?" Noah's eyes slightly widen as he takes in what you're wearing, a very short light pink sparkly mini skirt with a matching top and platform boots resembling a stage outfit Sabrina carpenter wears. "You look, extremely good ya know?" He says looking at you up and down. "uh huh thanks now lets go" you say rushing.

After the concert had started Noah was definitely sure he was going to tease you at home after the concert especially after hearing you say "come right on me, I mean camaraderie" well, until the song 'juno' started playing and Noah quickly got what the song was about but what he didn't expect was the position part, Sabrina laid on the floor lifting one leg then swiftly going into the splits, you had jokingly told him that you had apparently "never tried that one in your life" obviously this was supposed to be a light hearted joke especially with the amount of teasing this man gave you every day, but he took it another way, those words making him feel warm and weak, in that moment he thought about you laying there for him completely at his disposal, doing everything and anything for him. He wouldn't lie and say that he's never thought about you in another way than more than friends or that he's never thought of you bare before him doing so many sinful things to-and with him but damn, right now he just wanted to take you away and fuck you til your dumb in the back of his car.

After the concert had ended and you guys got back in the car (well, barely since you were tipsy) Noah couldn't stop thinking about what you had said, it was stupid really, but the fact that just thinking about you in that same position, making you cum until you were seeing stars and just have you. "I actually think that this is the best night of my life" you slurred while giggling. "oh really? And why is that miss I love to scream horny lyrics?" You dramatically gasped and put your hand on your heart, "you wound me sir, and also you listen to the weekend, that's wayyyyy worse than just saying I'm so fucking horny"

sir. That word alone made his cock twitch, not because he likes being called that but because he wants to hear you call him that again and again. "I guess your right" he clears his throat "well, we should get going traffics gonna suck either way right?" He tries to change the topic, You hum in response "well I mean yeah but why don't we wait for a while? Everyone's gonna be headed the same direction and we don't have to be up early tomorrow, plus if I get motion sickness while being tipsy, well that's not gonna be pretty so lets just, wait it out." That wouldn't work for Noah, he just needed to take a cold shower and relax cause if not god knows he would be struggling especially with how you act while tipsy. Last time he was alone with you while tipsy it ended up in you talking about how no one was good for you and that you couldn't even have sex because it didn't feel right, and yes you did cry on him that day. Noah wasn't going to push the idea of going back home since he knew you were gonna make him agree with you either way. He just needed to figure out how to distract himself.

"you okay? You seem tense... Like a lot." You said putting a hand on his shoulder, "uh yeah I'm fine just a little tired that's all." "Um..." You said trying to come up with something. "well you can sleep in the backseat with your head in my lap for you to be comfortable" "um, sure" he said, he climbed into the back of the car and sat down waiting for you to come climb in the back, once you did you accidentally fell on his lap, your skirt rose up and you felt his semi hard on. "Shit, sorry noah" your faces had matching flushed cheeks and that nervous look in your eyes, you tried to move away so you could sit down on the seat but his grip was firm holding you in place. You looked at him nervous and slightly excited, he started lightly caressing your exposed thighs not realizing you half exposed ass since he was so focused on your face and on every little expression that changed. The air felt hotter and your senses had heightened feeling every bit of him covered body except for the hand that was on your thigh that's the thing you could feel the most. The moment felt like eternities but was actually mere seconds. "Y/n?" "yes?" You said barely above a whisper.

"hypothetically if I were to kiss you right now, what would you hypothetically do?" His question took you aback, was he actually going to do this? "Hypothetically, I think I would want more than just a kiss." His eyebrows slightly raised and he nodded just a tiny bit, he carefully but quickly lifted you up and positioned you so you were straddling him. "So... About what you said inside, you've never tried that? Ever?" He said a teasing smirk on his lips. You gulped trying to understand what he was trying to do, "no... I haven't like ever." "would you like to?" Your eyes widened, your breath got heavier, jesus this man could make you nervous in a second.

"What?" "Would. You. Like. To. Try. It?" He put punctuation at every word, soaking up the fact that he could get you like this without even doing anything. "y-yes" you said basically breathless, Noah didn't say anything he just slowly lifted your skirt and made sure that you would be prepared.

He leaned in leaving a peak on your neck going all the way up until he reached your lips and asked "may i?" After you nodded just wanting some kind of touch he leaned in, lips touching yours as if he was testing the waters first. you both had a good rhythm it was slow and passionate, god knows how long you've been wanting to do this with him, his hands started to ride up your thighs to grip your ass, once he did you slightly gasped which gave him the freedom to slip his tongue into your mouth tasting you properly. He slowly moved his hips against yours trying to get some friction as he couldn't get enough of you, your hands were tangled in his hair making it disheveled and messy but he didn't give a shit about that with you like this.

"Fuck Noah, I need you" you moan out breathlessly. "need me to what princess?" God that nickname could make you fold any day, "i... I need you inside me" he nodded quickly and laid you down in the backseat slowly stripping you of your clothes, every layer he took off weirdly felt like a layer of the feelings that you two had for each other was being exposed and shown, with no lies nor any doubts, and sure you could've expected this to just be another quick fuck but it wasn't, it was love and passion that you two had been holding on to and keeping a secret for the years and years of your friendship.

Noah gazed and admired your naked body taking everything in as if he were never to see it again, he softly kissed up your thighs and stopped at were your core is to ask "are you sure?" You nodded but responded with a quick yes because you knew he needed a verbal answer "green if you're okay, yellow if you need to slow down and red if you want me to stop. Ok?"

"ok." Noah placed a soft kiss on her core earning him a soft whimper from you a signal that he could keep going, he left kitten licks still just warming you up until you had finally had enough and had asked him for even more which was what he was waiting for. He, to put it bluntly, ate you like it was his last meal making you say his name like a prayer. You felt that familiar knot in your stomach tightening begging to release, "Noah I'm gonn- can i-" you barely muttered out "cum for me baby, let go." euphoria washed over you, making you feel like you weren't real. "you still with me princess?" Noah asked making sure you were ok, his hands rubbed up and down your thighs the feeling making the sense of touch come back. "Yeah, yeah I just I need you inside me noah." Noah smirked and for one last time kissed your thighs each two times, "your wish is my command doll."

He sat up and stripped himself of his clothes, you couldn't help but stare at his bare self, you'd imagined him before but god it was better than you'd expected. "take a picture it'll last longer" he teased "oh shut it" you said, he grabbed your legs and pulled you closer to him hooking a leg on his shoulder the other resting on the seat as you laid on your elbows, this was a surprise because you didn't think he would actually do the position you just thought he was joking or teasing you like always. "what are you doing?" He raised an eyebrow "I told you we would do it." You just shut up and bit your lip as he positioned himself to your entrance. He slowly slid in making sure you adjusted to his size before starting to thrust, when you gave him the signal he started moving at a slower pace but quickly picked it up when he heard the first whiny moan you let out, it felt fucking magical for a lack of words, every thrust and moan that you both let out was so intimate and special because you both knew that it was just for you two, not for anyone others ears to hear, not for anyone other to feel how deep he went and how fucking wet you were for him it was just, the two of you.

You could tell he was about to cum when his thrust got sloppy and fast, you weren't to far behind either the second knot in your stomach getting tighter and tighter waiting for you to cum, you walls tightened against him and you started basically chanting his name, your hands intertwined as your head fell back as your breath got unsteady. "Fuck doll, I'm gonna come." You squeezed his hand "come for me noah" you both let out groans as you came at the same time, his hot seed filling you up until you were leaking cum. He collapsed on top of you breathless but so fucking satisfied and so were you. "We- we should probably get home shouldn't we?" He held onto you tighter "in a bit"

The next day...

You were scrolling on your phone through tiktok while laying on Noah's chest when a video of the concert from yesterday popped up, specifically the juno position part, you watched as Sabrina raised her leg while asking the question "have you ever tried this one?" remembering last night. Noah spoke up as he heard and just said-

Yes we did.

[rottiens]

red in his cheeks, green in his eyes┊i. rin

✮ tags. . (18+), fluff (sfw), not established relationship, all characters are adults. no use of pronouns but afab!reader in mind, reader wears a dress and earrings.

✮ summary. . you always enjoy making your soon-to-be boyfriend blush; it's so simple that it's become a habit.

✮ wc. . 1k

✮ notes. . i want to make him blush and make him so uncomfortable that he doesn't know what to do with himself, my bad lskd | divider creds: cafekitsune.

Rin Itoshi is many things.

Some people may point out how good a soccer player he is, others will comment that he is cold and unfriendly. If you ask him himself he will tell you that he is (probably) resentful and vengeful.

However to you, while many of these things are true (especially the part about him being cold), you will highlight how good of a listener he is, especially since he prefers to stay quiet while listening to you direct the conversation where you want it to go and how you want it to go, providing occasional monosyllables or some vibration that comes from his throat rather than his chest. He will make contributions to the conversation about his personal life or his day exclusively if you ask directly about it.

Although the last few weeks, he has been a bit more talkative than usual (that is, complete sentences without you having to ask him about his day first).

Rin is someone sweet, at least in his own way. His good listening makes him surprise you with details you're not expecting, like remembering important dates or little details of what you told in a babbling outburst that you barely remember now and you like him, you genuinely do. You're able to see through him, really see what's hidden in his chest behind those layers of hatred and rancor that hide pain and Rin hates it.

Among the long list of things he hates, is your way of being able to read him so easily. Recognizing why there are wrinkles on his forehead, his wrinkled nose or pursed lips. He dislikes how gentle you are when you approach him, you treat him with the same gentleness in which a butterfly would sit on a flower and that settles his stomach, tightens his gut and makes him feel sick; to the point where he claims he has a fever, it's not normal the way his whole body suddenly starts to burn, his forehead and ears, his neck and chest tight, along with sweaty palms.

He dislikes how nice you are to others when most don't deserve it and also how pretty you look when you wear those summer dresses because they make others look, when no one else should be able to admire how beautiful you are.

There are many things Rin detests about himself, his brother and certain parts of your personality, but never you, or your presence in his room late at night or your high, excited laughter that comes straight from your stomach. He could never hate you, not when you look at him like you do now, with dilated pupils and eyes full of genuine concern. He didn't remember what it was like to be treated like that, not at least not since he was a child.

“You didn't have to come see me.” Rin says it more out of concern —you are sick, after all— but he tries to sound nonchalant, ignoring the incessant drumming of his heart. His crossed arms rest against his chest as he leans his body weight against the wall.

“Of course I had to, it's your last game, I had to come give you your good luck gift,” you say, a smile etched into your words and with a voice heavy with a cold, you almost sound like you just woke up.

It's halftime, and Rin has slipped out of the locker room so he can see you in the semi-dark hallway. Even in the poor lighting, the earrings he gave you for your birthday sparkle with excitement, a nice touch that goes so well with your impish smile and the outfit you've chosen for him.

“Gift?” His greenish eyes go to yours after scanning (he hopes slyly) your figure.

“Hm.” You purr as you lean in a little closer, invading his personal space. You take his arm, freeing it from the shield that covered his ribs, to intertwine your fingers with his. That simple contact is enough for the dizziness and numbness to take hold of him again.

His fingers tighten under the heat of your touch. And when you lean in for a quick kiss, his whole body stiffens, his eyes open wider, unlike yours. You're so close he can feel your chest press against his, as your perfume envelops him with a familiar warmth. Your lips linger together for an instant, not deepening the kiss that seems to be the promise of something more.

You've been dating for a few weeks, though calling it “dating” is debatable. You're still in that unlabeled limbo where you're two friends holding hands, shopping together, going to the movies, and occasionally sharing a kiss. Sometimes you'd like to know what Rin is thinking….

“If you win you'll have more of these,” as you pull away from him you lick your bottom lip, still tasting him in your mouth.

…Especially at times like these, where his cheeks are so red from a simple touch, where he knows how to hide his nervousness so well and yet his face always gives it away.

His eyes drift to the end of the hallway, to where the light of the stadium devours the shadows. From there, the bustle of the stands comes muffled, almost drowned out by the buzz of adrenaline coursing through your body.

Rin pulls away, pushing aside the fingers you had grabbed and allowing them to return to their usual space, on his chest. Then he heads toward the locker room, perhaps to wipe off his sweat and get some water before returning to the field. Before disappearing completely, he stops to look at you. Your hands hang clasped together, and your smile —that smile that warms his body— seems to light up as if all the lights are on you.

“Watch me score the next goal for you.” Your smile widens, revealing your pearly teeth, and Rin wants to die right there. The next words he tries to say get stuck in his throat a couple of times, as if an invisible hand is squeezing his neck.

“You look beautiful,” he says, with a heated face. “But I'm still pissed that you're here while you're still sick.” And maybe, just maybe, those are the most romantic words you've heard from him in weeks.

You know how hard it is for Rin to open up and express how he feels. Even so, you're willing to wait for him until he's ready to admit what you both already know. In the meantime, you'll continue to relish every opportunity to make him blush or feel uncomfortable in the sweetest way possible.

[the-winter-spider]

Invisible | Part 23

Bucky x reader AU

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: Tiny smidge of brief angst, but flufffff

A/N: Only a few more chapters to go..... 😭🫶🏻

The warm scent of roasted vegetables and garlic filled Sam’s apartment as he moved around the kitchen, Wanda and Natasha chatting at the table. A few candles flickered on the counter, their soft light casting a cozy glow. The night had started lighthearted, with jokes and reminiscing about old times, but there was an underlying tension—Sam had been quieter than usual.

As the three of them sat down to eat, Sam finally cleared his throat, breaking the casual flow of conversation. “So, there’s something I need to tell you both.”

Wanda and Natasha exchanged curious glances, but Natasha was the first to speak. “What’s up?”

Sam sighed, running a hand over his face. “I’ve been offered a big promotion at the VA. It’s… it’s a lot more responsibility, a lot more pay, and honestly, it’s kind of my dream job.”

“That’s amazing!” Wanda said, clapping her hands together. “Congratulations, Sammy! You deserve it.”

Natasha smiled, but her brow furrowed slightly. “That is amazing! Buuuuut, why do you look like someone just told you your dog died?”

Sam let out a nervous laugh, fiddling with the edge of his napkin. “Because there’s a catch. The job’s in Washington... I’ll be moving in a week and a half.”

The table fell silent. Wanda’s excitement dimmed slightly, her smile softening. “Oh, Sam… that’s… wow.”

Natasha leaned back in her chair, her lips pressing into a thin line. “That’s a big change.”

“It is,” Sam admitted. “But it’s the right move for me. And don’t get me wrong, I’m excited, but leaving all of you behind? That’s the hard part.”

Wanda reached across the table, placing a hand over his. “We’re happy for you, Sam. Really. We’ll miss you, but this is huge.”

Natasha nodded in agreement. “Yeah, we’ll miss you like crazy, but you’ve got to do what’s best for you, and we'll always be here you know that"

Sam smiled, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “Thanks, guys that really means a lot.”

Sam took a sip of his beer, his eyes darting between Wanda and Natasha as if he was working up the nerve to say something else.

“Who else knows?” Wanda asked cutting him off, taking a sip of her beer.

“Well, now that you both know, I should probably let you in on a little secret,” Sam said, his tone teasing but hesitant. “You two are actually the last ones to find out, don't hate me"

Natasha raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms. “The last ones?” she asked, her voice tinged with mock offense. “Wow, Sam. Save the best for last?”

Sam chuckled. “Exactly. Had to save the best for last, thats right!.... I told Bucky first—obviously…then Y/N, then Steve.”

Wanda leaned forward, smirking. “So, basically, you told everyone else first.”

“Listen,” Sam said, holding his hands up defensively. “I wanted to tell everyone together, but, uh, let’s just say there’s been a lot going on lately.” His gaze flicked to Natasha for a split second before he looked away.

Natasha narrowed her eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Sam hesitated, taking another sip of his beer. “Well, I, uh… I heard about what Steve said to her after the whole thing between you two.”

Natasha froze, her expression hardening. “What do you mean? What did Steve say?”

Sam’s lips parted, then closed as he struggled to find the right words. Wanda’s head whipped toward him. “You’re not just gonna leave us hanging, are you?”

Sam sighed, leaning back in his chair. “Look, it’s not really my place to say what exactly happened. But… yeah, I heard about it all"

Natasha’s jaw tightened, her fingers curling around the edge of the table. “We haven’t talked all week. After I told her we, I needed space, we’ve been taking that seriously this time.”

Wanda nodded slowly, her voice soft. “She hasn’t mentioned it to me either. We’ve just been talking about the little trip Bucky planned for them.”

"What trip?" Natasha questioned "I didn't know about a trip"

Wanda sighed "They're at that Cabin you all went to for summer when you were kids, and too be fair you asked for space from her not the other way around, probably why she didn't tell you...."

Natasja groaned rubbing her hands over her eyes. Sam’s gaze softened, his usual teasing edge replaced with concern. “Nat, I think she's been through a lot lately. She didn’t tell me much, but I know she ran into Steve after she left you, and well he said some pretty outta pocket things to her.”

Natasha blinked, her mouth opening and closing as if trying to process his words. “What… what things?”

Sam shook his head. “It’s not my story to tell.... But from what I’ve pieced together, She’s been carrying a lot on her shoulders—between the things with you, what Steve said both times, and just… everything.”

Natasha’s expression was unreadable, her eyes distant. After a long pause, she murmured, “I should’ve handled things better. I let my feelings get in the way, and now…”

Sam reached across the table, resting his hand on hers. “Nat, it’s not too late. You and her have been through worse and come out stronger. Just… don’t let this fester for too long”

Natasha’s lips pressed into a thin line, her voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t even know where to start.”

Wanda gave her a reassuring smile. “Start by talking to her. You know she’s always willing to hear you out, you’re besties for a reason”

Sam nodded, his tone firm but kind. “Exactly. You’ve both been through too much together to let something like this tear you apart.”

Natasha exhaled sharply, running a hand through her hair. “I’ll try. I just… I didn’t realize how much I let this all spiral. Ugh, thanks guys.”

He gave her a small grin. “Hey, what are friends for? Besides, I can’t move away knowing my kids aren’t playing nice.”

Wanda burst into laughter, smacking his arm playfully. “Your kids?”

“Yeah,” Sam said, shrugging with mock seriousness. “I need all my children to get along before I leave. I can’t abandon this dysfunctional little family otherwise.”

Natasha let out a reluctant chuckle, the tension in her shoulders easing slightly. “Okay, Dad. We’ll figure it out.”

Sam raised his beer. “That’s all I ask. Now, who’s ready for dessert? I made brownies, and I’m not letting you two leave without trying them.”

As the brownies were passed around the table, the mood lightened, but Sam couldn’t shake the subtle tension radiating from Natasha. He glanced at Wanda, who gave him an encouraging nod, as if silently urging him to address the elephant in the room, the one between him and Wanda, the one Natasha didn't even know about. Wanda only knew because she got here 30 minutes before Natasha and Sam thought who better to ask if he should tell her what he knew than someone who lived with Natasha 24/7 and knew her like the back of her hand.

Sam took a deep breath, setting down his beer. “Hey, Nat,” he started casually, but there was a seriousness to his tone that made her look up. “There’s, uh… something else I think you should know.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow, already bracing herself. “What now, Sam? You moving to the moon next?”

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Nah, this one’s not about me. It’s about Steve.”

Her posture stiffened at the mention of his name, but she tried to play it off. “What about him?”

Sam leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “When I talked to Steve recently, he mentioned something… about you.”

Natasha’s eyes narrowed, her lips tightening. “What exactly did he say?”

Wanda’s gaze darted between them, her brow furrowing with concern. “Sam, don’t dance around it.”

He sighed, running a hand over his face. “Look, she told Steve that you’re in love with him.”

Natasha froze, her eyes widening for a split second before narrowing into a sharp glare. “She what?”

Sam held up his hands defensively. “Hey, don’t shoot the messenger. She didn’t mean anything by it. It just… came out.”

Natasha pushed back from the table, standing abruptly. “Why the hell would she say that? That wasn’t hers to tell.”

Wanda reached out, trying to calm her. “Nat, wait—”

“No, Wanda,” Natasha snapped, pacing the length of the kitchen. “I didn’t want him to know! Not like that. Not—God, why would she do that?”

Sam stood, keeping his voice calm. “Because she thought he deserved to know, Nat. She wasn’t trying to hurt you. She cares about you, and she thought—”

“Thought what?” Natasha interrupted, spinning on her heel to face him. “That I needed her to play matchmaker? That I couldn’t handle my own feelings?”

“Natasha,” Wanda said gently, standing as well. “She didn’t mean to overstep. You know she’s just been trying to keep everyone together.”

Natasha scoffed, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. “Well, she’s doing a great job of it, isn’t she?”

Sam sighed, stepping closer. “Nat, come on. You know her. She’s not trying to make things worse. She’s just… juggling a lot right now. And so are you.”

Natasha shook her head, her frustration palpable. “I don’t even know what to do with this. Steve hasn’t said a damn thing to me about it. Does he know how humiliating that is?”

Sam hesitated, then spoke carefully. “Maybe he’s trying to figure it out... You’ve had feelings for him for years, and he’s been untangling his own mess with her. It’s a lot for everyone.”

Natasha’s jaw tightened, her emotions warring on her face. After a long moment, she sighed, her shoulders slumping. “I just… I didn’t want him to know like this. It feels so… exposed.”

The tension in the kitchen hung heavy as Natasha paced, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. Wanda, seated at the small dining table with her glass of wine, raised her hands to diffuse the brewing storm. “Okay, but to be fair, Nat… you meddled between Bucky and Y/N for years. You practically shoved them together.”

Natasha stopped mid-step, her head snapping toward Wanda. “That’s different.”

Sam, leaning casually against the counter with a brownie in one hand and a beer in the other, raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? How exactly is it different?”

Natasha’s jaw tightened, her voice clipped. “Because they were obviously in love with each other. Anyone with eyes could see that. They just needed a push—a little guidance.”

Wanda wasn’t buying it, her expression skeptical. “And what exactly do you think you and Steve are?”

Natasha rolled her eyes, exasperated. “That’s not the same, Wanda. Steve doesn’t…” Her words faltered, the usually sharp edge of her tone softening just slightly. “He doesn’t feel that way about me.”

Wanda sat up straighter, her voice gentler but still firm. “You don’t know that. You’re assuming, just like Y/N assumed with Bucky for years. Maybe it’s not the same, Nat, but… if you’re not even willing to try, how will you ever know?”

Natasha scoffed, clearly uncomfortable, her fingers tapping nervously against the counter. “It’s not about trying, okay? Steve’s not… he’s still hung up on her. Everyone and there pet knows that. I’m not going to be someone’s second choice.”

Sam, who had been quiet through most of the exchange, let out a low whistle. “Yikes, this got real heavy, real fast.”

Natasha shot him a look, but Sam raised his brownie defensively. “Hey, I’m just saying. All this angst? It’s like being back in college.”

Wanda couldn’t help but laugh softly, the tension breaking slightly. Natasha’s lips twitched, but her frustration still simmered beneath the surface.

Wanda placed a comforting hand on Natasha’s arm. “You have every right to feel the way you do. But maybe this is a chance to finally have that conversation with him. No more guessing, no more waiting.”

Natasha’s lips pressed into a thin line, her eyes glistening slightly. “Yeah, because those conversations always go so well,” she muttered bitterly.

Sam reached out, giving her shoulder a squeeze. “Nat, you’re one of the strongest people I know. If anyone can handle this, it’s you.”

She let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “Thanks, Dad.”

Wanda smiled softly, her voice teasing. “Hey, he’s just trying to get all his kids on good terms before he leaves.”

That finally earned a small, reluctant smile from Natasha. She looked at Sam, her anger softening. “I’ll figure it out. But if this goes sideways, you’re explaining to Steve why I threw his ass out a window.”

Sam grinned. “Deal.”

Before anyone could say more, the sound of a key turning in the lock echoed through the apartment. The door opened, and Steve walked in, looking tired but still managing to offer a small smile. “Hey.”

Sam perked up immediately, pushing off the counter. “Perfect timing Stevie. Brownie or beer?” He held up both as an offering.

Steve chuckled lightly, hanging his jacket by the door. “Why not both?” he replied, running a hand through his hair before stepping into the kitchen. “What’s going on in here?”

The three of them exchanged a quick glance before Wanda, ever the smooth one, piped up. “Oh, you know. Just solving the world’s problems over alcohol and baked goods.”

Steve’s brow furrowed slightly as he looked at Natasha, who quickly busied herself with clearing a nonexistent mess on the counter. “You okay?” he asked her directly, his tone quiet and concerned.

Natasha didn’t meet his eyes, her voice brisk. “Fine. Just tired.”

Steve didn’t push, nodding slowly before reaching for the beer Sam had handed him. “Well, I’m gonna chug this beer and devour some brownies, long day.”

As he moved toward the living room, Wanda watched him go, then turned to Natasha. “You’re gonna have to talk to him eventually, you know.”

Natasha shot Wanda a warning look, but her shoulders sagged slightly as she leaned against the counter. “I know,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

Sam, finishing his brownie, clapped his hands together. “Alright, that’s my cue. I’ll let you ladies work out all the feelings. Steve and I are gonna dive into this six-pack.” He winked and walked toward the living room, leaving Natasha and Wanda in a lingering silence.

Natasha finally sat down across from Wanda, swirling her glass of wine but not drinking. “I don’t know if I can, Wanda. Talk to him, I mean.”

Wanda tilted her head, her voice soft. “Why not?”

Natasha let out a bitter laugh. “Because I’ve been standing on the sidelines for years. Watching him pine for her, knowing I’d never measure up. How do you even start a conversation after that?”

Wanda reached across the table, her fingers brushing Natasha’s. “You start by being honest. No more sidelines, Nat. You deserve to be happy too.”

Natasha’s eyes shone with unshed tears, but she quickly blinked them away. “Easier said than done.”

Wanda smiled gently. “Yeah, but the best things usually are.”

As they finished dessert, the conversation shifted back to lighter topics. Sam stood to start clearing plates, and Natasha leaned back in her chair, glancing over at Steve. “Hey, you mind stepping out to the balcony with me for a second?”

Steve raised an eyebrow but nodded, grabbing his beer before following her outside.

The cool night air was a welcome contrast to the warmth inside. The city lights twinkled in the distance, casting a soft glow over the balcony. Natasha leaned against the railing, her arms crossed as she stared out at the skyline.

Steve joined her, standing a few feet away. “What’s on your mind?”

Natasha hesitated, her fingers gripping the railing tightly. Finally, she sighed and turned to face him. “Sam told me you know.”

Steve’s brow furrowed. “About what?”

She rolled her eyes. “About me, how I feel about you.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed, his expression softening. “So it’s true.”

“Yeah,” Natasha said, her voice quieter now. “It’s true.”

Steve stepped closer, resting his beer on the railing. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it didn’t matter,” Natasha said, her tone a mix of frustration and resignation. “You were always looking at her. Always chasing after her. And I was… I don’t know. Just there.”

Steve’s jaw tightened, his gaze falling to the floor. “That’s not fair, Nat.”

“No,” she snapped, “what’s not fair is sitting on the sidelines, watching the person you love pine after someone else. Watching them hurt over and over, knowing there’s nothing you can do because they don’t see you that way.”

Steve’s eyes met hers, guilt flashing across his face. “I didn’t know.”

“Of course, you didn’t,” Natasha said bitterly. “Because you were too busy looking through me.”

Silence hung heavy between them, the weight of her words settling deep in his chest. He opened his mouth to speak, but Natasha held up a hand, stopping him.

“I’m not saying this to make you feel bad,” she said, her voice softer now. “I just… I needed to say it. For me.”

Steve nodded slowly, running a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, Nat. For not seeing you. For making you feel like you didn’t matter.”

She offered a small, bittersweet smile. “I know you didn’t mean to. But it doesn’t change how it felt.”

Steve reached out hesitantly, placing a hand on her shoulder. “You matter to me. You always have.”

Natasha shook her head, stepping back. “I can’t do this, Steve. Not right now. You need to figure out what you want—who you are—before you even think about coming back to me.”

Her words hung in the air, final and unwavering. Steve nodded, his heart heavy with regret. “I understand.”

“Good,” Natasha said, her voice steady. “Because I’m not going to wait around forever.”

With that, she turned and walked back inside, leaving Steve alone on the balcony, the weight of her words settling deep in his chest. He stared out at the city, his mind racing with everything he’d lost and everything he might never have.

The cabin glowed warmly under the soft flicker of candlelight and the crackling fire. The bottle of wine between you and Bucky was nearly empty, the two of you leaning comfortably against the couch on the plush rug. You took a sip from your glass, savoring the quiet intimacy of the moment, when Bucky suddenly set his glass down and leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees.

Bucky pressed a kiss to your forehead. "Thank you," he whispered.

"For what?" you asked

"For loving me, for letting me love you."

You smiled, nuzzling closer to him. "There's nothing and no one i'd rather have than you, Buck."

“I need to ask you something,” he said, his voice steady but tinged with something you couldn’t quite place.

You tilted your head, smiling softly at him. “Okay. What’s on your mind?”

He hesitated, running a hand through his hair. “It’s about what you told me… about Steve. What he said to you. That you shouldn’t be with me, that you should be with him.”

You exhaled slowly, setting your own glass down. “Bucky…”

“It’s been bugging me,” he admitted, his eyes meeting yours, vulnerable and searching. “I mean, do you—do you think he really meant that? Or was he just… hurting?”

You reached out and took his hand in yours, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles. “Bucky, I think Steve was hurting. A lot. But there’s no way he really meant it. And even if he did… it wouldn’t matter. You’ve been my person since we were kids.”

His lips twitched into a small smile. “Really?”

You nodded, your voice softening. “Do you remember the first time you tried to push me on the swing? You said, ‘Sit here. I got you.’ Then you fell on your ass and scraped your knee.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “I wasn’t exactly smooth, was I?”

“No,” you teased, leaning closer. “But you’ve always been there for me, Buck. Always. I’ve never had a single doubt about that.”

Bucky’s shoulders relaxed, his grip on your hand tightening slightly. “Thank you. I just… I needed to hear it. With everything that’s been happening—with Steve, and now with Natasha.”

You hesitated for a moment before nodding. “What do you think is going to happen with them?”

Bucky sighed, leaning back against the couch and pulling you closer so you were tucked under his arm. “I don’t know. Natasha’s tough as nails, but Steve? He’s in his head a lot. They both deserve to be happy, though. Hopefully, they figure it out… together.”

“I hope so too,” you murmured, resting your head on his shoulder. “They both deserve a happy ending.”

The conversation lulled for a moment, the weight of the topic settling between you. Then you shifted, sitting up and looking at him. “Speaking of happy endings… Sam told me.”

Bucky blinked. “Told you what?”

“About his promotion, the big move.” You studied his face, waiting for his reaction.

Bucky let out a sigh, his thumb brushing against your hand. “I wanted to tell you, but he asked me not to. I’m sorry—”

“Absolutely not,” you cut him off, shaking your head. “You don’t get to apologize for that. Sam trusted you with something big. I could never be mad at you for keeping that promise.”

His shoulders relaxed slightly. “It’s gonna be weird, though. Him being halfway across the country.”

“Yeah,” you admitted, your voice quieter. “It’s going to be weird for all of us.”

Bucky shifted, his hand gently cupping your cheek and turning you to face him. “We’ll figure it out. Just like we always do.”

You smiled faintly, leaning into his touch. “You and me, right?”

“Always,” he said softly.

You let the moment linger before a thought struck you. “So… what’s our next step?”

Bucky frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” you said, gesturing vaguely, “we’re together, but we’re still living as roommates. Two separate bedrooms, two lives in one space. What do we want to do about that?”

Bucky tilted his head, his thumb brushing against your cheek. “What do you want, doll?”

You hesitated, your cheeks warming under the soft glow of the bedside lamp. “I’d love to get a house someday,” you murmured, your voice carrying a mix of hope and uncertainty. “Something with a backyard. Maybe even some space for… you know.”

Bucky’s lips quirked into a teasing smile, his blue eyes sparkling. “Kids?” he asked, his tone light but his gaze searching yours.

“Maybe,” you said softly, feeling your cheeks grow warmer. “What about you? Do you… want that?”

He didn’t answer right away, but the way his expression softened made your heart skip a beat. Slowly, he leaned forward, resting his forehead gently against yours. The weight of his next words felt like a vow. “A house, a backyard, a family. With you?” His voice dropped to a whisper, thick with emotion. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

Your chest tightened, the sheer sincerity in his tone leaving you breathless. But then, his lips twitched into a grin as he added, “But… in New York?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, your fingers brushing against his scruffy jaw. “Maybe… Boston?” you offered, the word feeling both foreign and perfect on your tongue.

He pulled back just enough to meet your eyes, his grin widening into something radiant. “I don’t care where we are, as long as I’m with you,” he said earnestly. Then, his tone shifted, a playful but serious edge creeping in. “But you know, we don’t have to wait.”

Your brows furrowed slightly, tilting your head in question. “What do you mean?”

Bucky’s hands slid to your waist, his thumbs rubbing slow circles against your sides as he leaned closer, his voice low and certain. “I mean, I don’t want to wait to start my life with you—our life. I think we’ve waited long enough. If we both want this, why not now? Time’s never on anyone’s side, and I don’t want to waste another second without having all of this with you.”

Your breath hitched at the raw truth in his words, your heart thudding wildly in your chest. “You really mean that?” you asked, your voice a shaky whisper.

He smiled, his lips brushing softly against yours before he pulled back just enough to answer. “I do. I just want to live my life with you already. So…” His eyes searched yours, his voice dropping to something intimate and vulnerable. “Boston?”

You felt the word settle deep inside you, grounding and exhilarating all at once. “Boston,” you whispered back, nodding as your lips curved into a smile.

Bucky’s grin returned, wide and boyish, and before you could say another word, he cupped your face and kissed you, long and sweet, as if sealing a promise. When he pulled back, his eyes shone with happiness. “You have no idea how good it feels to hear you say that.”

You laughed softly, running your fingers through his hair. “I think I have some idea.”

He pressed another kiss to your lips, this one lingering and slow. “Boston,” he murmured again, as if savoring the sound of it. “It’s going to be amazing, doll. Us, a house, a backyard…” His grin turned mischievous. “Maybe even a dog before the kids, huh?”

You giggled, your heart feeling impossibly full. “One step at a time, Barnes.”

[ohithankyou]

decided to watch all of buck’s breakups last night and here are (part) of the conversations/how each of the breakups played out to compare and contrast if you so desire. i didn’t include the entire conversations because it would be too long and i think the parts i included capture the core of the breakups well enough.

note: information in square brackets is just some context i included since i didn't add the full conversations

buck and abby, breakup, 1x10:

[after abby’s mom passes and she books a ticket to ireland in an effort to find herself and what she wants]

abby: “. . .i care about you so much. you’re amazing. and these last few months, i think you've gotten me, at least halfway, to the person i want to be. but I've got to do this [go to ireland/travel] so that i know i have something to give.”

buck: “i’m excited for you. almost as much as i am, um, sad for me. i’m gonna miss you.”

abby: “i’m gonna miss you, too.”

[when buck is dropping her to the airport]

abby: "you're not gonna come in with me?"

buck: "i learned a while ago, you never go beyond the glass doors."

abby: "i must be crazy to be leaving you behind."

buck: "you're not leaving anything behind. you're moving toward something. and i'm gonna be right here when you come back, okay? go on. you got this, okay?"

abby: "take care of yourself, okay?"

buck: "you, too, abby."

buck and abby, ‘closure’, 3x18:

[after abby and buck meet for the first time since 1x10 when she and her finance are in a train derailment and buck + the 118 save his life]

abby: “. . .i just had no sense of self. i had to leave everything that i knew so that i could remember who i actually am.”

buck: “and you did, right? i mean, you did remember, but you still didn't come home.”

abby: “yeah, i know. i think i was afraid that if i came back, i would become that person again. because i missed you. i wanted to see you. but i didn't trust myself.”

buck: “because being here, being with me, you might lose yourself again?”

abby: “yeah.”

buck: “i’m glad to see you happy, abby. you deserve it.”

—

buck and ali, 2x18:

[after buck’s leg gets crushed under the fire truck and it hits ali what it means to be with a firefighter]

ali: “. . .look, it’s not like i didn't know you were in a dangerous line of work when i met you, you know, ten stories up of a collapsing high rise.”

buck: “exactly.”

ali: “that was one day. one day of my life, evan. it’s every day for you. i’m just starting to really understand what that means.”

buck: “wait, so-so you want me to quit my job, that's what you're asking me to do?”

ali: “no, i would never, i would never ask you to do that. listen. i know it's who you are. i’m just not sure. if it's…”

buck: “…who you are.”

ali: “hey. i don't know yet. okay?”

—

buck and taylor, 5x18:

[after taylor publishes the story about jonah buck had asked her not]

taylor: “. . .i’m sorry you're still upset about the story.”

buck: “you’re not sorry for what you did, though.”

taylor: “the story was gonna come out regardless. if i hadn't have broken it, someone else would have.”

buck: “you couldn't have called me first? no. you-you just, you figured i’d be fine. i’d get over it.”

taylor: “buck, i wasn't trying to hurt you or anyone else. i was just trying to get the truth out there. a truth the public has every right to know.”

buck: “this is literally our first argument all over again.”

taylor: “which is why we shouldn't be having it. you knew who i was when we started dating.”

buck: “i guess i thought i could learn to live with it.”

taylor: “i don't want to be something you have to learn to live with.”

buck: “and i don't want to keep on making the same mistakes. i need things to be different, taylor.”

taylor: “okay. i’m willing to try that. clean slate.”

buck: “yeah. just not together.”

—

buck and tommy, 8x06:

[after bucks tells tommy that he also dated abby]

buck: ". . .my relationship with abby was—it was the most transformative of my life. until now. look, i-i think one of the reasons that i am so comfortable with you is-is 'cause you're so comfortable with you."

tommy: "i wasn't always that way."

buck: "i know, i-i do. and honestly, it just makes me admire you more."

buck: "i want you to move in with me. i want you to move in with me. i-'m ready to take the next step. and i'm not saying let's get married or engaged, even though we would have the right, thanks to the brave people who came before, including you. all I'm saying is, why be apart when we can be together?"

tommy: "evan, that is so sweet but I can't move in with you."

buck: "and why not?"

tommy: "because, i know how this ends."

buck: "uh, wh-what's that supposed to mean?"

tommy: "look, evan. you're an incredible guy. big-hearted. hot as hell. funny. impulsive. but what you're feeling right now is... is new. and it's exciting, and it feels like forever. but you're still figuring yourself out. and that's good."

buck: "what are you saying?"

tommy: "i'm saying no matter how bad i wanted to be, i'm not your last. i'm your first."

buck: "well, hey, they-they can be the same thing."

tommy: "but they usually aren't. if i were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it but you'd end up breaking my heart. and i, i don't think that i could deal with that."

tommy: "i should go."

buck: "wait, wait, wait, hey, hey, um... wait, d-did you just break up with me?"

tommy: "yeah. i guess i did. believe me, i didn't see it coming, either. should've known that parking spot was too good to be true. i'll see you around, buck."

[drewsbraziliangf]

there'll be happiness after you | Drew Starkey x black!reader

summary: what can you do when you're back in the same place where you had your heart broken for the last time? Is there any way to move past all the hurt and longing?

a/n: ok so I'm sorry for the long wait for this... This will be the last part of this story :'( I want to thank you guys for the love shown in this because this is my first time writing for anything other than House of the Dragon in a loooong time. I hugely suggest listening to "No Goodbyes" by Dua Lipa, "Funeral" by Zara Larsson or "happiness" by Taylor Swift during this read. I hope y'all enjoy it!

dividers: @/saradika

warnings: some cuss words, angst.

The morning after a was never my favorite. Always waking up with a pounding headache and lips as dry as a desert is not the best way to start a day. But there was something about today that made it all worse, for some reason, my brain decided to remember most of the events of the previous night─ touches, kisses, promises, apologies─ everything.

A part of me prayed that I'd forget about it and be able to sneak out without him noticing, but seemed like he was expecting that already and gotten up before I was even awake. The only thing that made it clear that he was indeed at home, was the soft sounds coming from the kitchen.

Okay... I know this apartment like the back of my mind, so since the kitchen door wasn't a direct line for the main door, maybe if I'm quiet enough I'd be able to leave without him noticing, right?

Dwelling on it would only make it worse, so I got up, picked up my clothes from the day before, and quickly got dressed again, this time feeling much more exposed than I did last night. I looked around for my phone, but it wasn't anywhere to be seen. Cursing myself, I remembered that I left it in the living room. Great, a detour.

Thankfully I didn't have to worry too much about how my hair looked as the braids did half the work in keeping it presentable. With a sigh, I walked out of the room with my heels in hand and kept quietly praying to the gods above to grant me this one wish. I just needed my phone and then I'm able to leave.

As I reached the main hall, I could see the bathroom door closed and the lights on. Great, this would be even easier. I quickly walked towards the living room looking for my phone, thankfully it was exactly where I remembered leaving it. It took me no time to grab the device and turn toward the door, only to have one of the biggest jump scares of my life.

"HOLY SHIT!" My left hand instinctively went to my chest as my heart rate increased.

Yeah, there goes my prayers. Drew was leaning against the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest. He was wearing a black tank top and a pair of grey sweatpants. His hair was messy and there was still a small air of sleepiness around him. He cleared his throat as he stared at me.

"Yeah, I knew you'd try to do that," he said with a shrug.

"Well, this is exactly what I was trying to avoid," I snap back after I'm calmer.

I could feel my hands getting sweaty and the weight of his gaze upon me was making me feel so uncomfortable. Like there was this white elephant in the room getting bigger by the second.

"Uhm, I kinda have to go-"

"Come on, let's talk over breakfast."

Without giving me a chance to answer he walked back towards the kitchen and I had no choice but to follow him. With a bit of reluctance, I dragged my bare feet after him. The cold tiles on the floor were not even bothering me as they were five minutes ago.

The worst kind of deja vu bathed me as I stood by the counter. The last time I was here was the worst day of my life, so I wasn't feeling great watching him move so effortlessly.

He filled two glasses with black coffee and the toaster with white bread before picking up some jam and cottage cream cheese.

I sat on one of the benches and quietly accepted the plate he handed me once it was all done, he then proceeded to sit by my side and we began to eat in silence, more like me watching him eat as I sipped my coffee.

"So you were just going to sneak out?" He asked casually after a few minutes as he coated his toast with jam.

"What did you expect me to do? I shouldn't even come here in the first place," I bite back and he places his mug down.

"Well, I thought you would at least grant me the chance to talk. We have a lot to talk about."

"No, we don't. We fucked and that's it. It shouldn't have happened and it won't happen again. It can't happen again." I confess, with the instinct of avoiding to meet his eyes.

"What do you mean? We have to talk this through and fix what happened. I know that I fucked up but you just left. As if it all meant nothing to you. We were getting married, for fucks sake." He says, throwing his hands in the air in annoyance.

At that, I stand up and begin walking back toward the living room. I had to leave. This could escalate and both of us leave even more hurt than before.

"I'm not doing this again. I didn't just leave. You pushed me away. You didn't give me a reason to stay. That's what happened."

"I love you! How can you say that?"

"Yeah, you might. But do you like me?" The words leave my mouth before a second to think them over.

He watches me for a second before running a hand over his face. All the traces of sleep were gone from his features now.

"Because I did. And I was so in love with you too," I continue, as my eyes begin to sting. "I was so ready to have the rest of my life by your side. So, how could you do that to me? When did I stop being enough?"

The questions kept flowing out and I couldn't filter my feelings or my words. I just wanted this to end once and for all. My brain couldn't stop reminiscing on last night's events. His touches, his kisses, him.

But being sober now and knowing it all was killing me. How could I be such a fool? After I tried so hard to erase him from my mind...

"No, baby, please listen to me, okay? Just let me talk," he pleaded taking a step closer.

"No, Drew. There is nothing to talk about. I shouldn't have come here and this shouldn't even be happening."

My voice is slightly pitchier than I'd like but I couldn't help it.

"Do you have any idea of how hard it was for me?" I ask looking at his glossy eyes. "I don't get to travel all around the world and the country so I can simply put what happened aside. I had to deal with pitying looks for weeks. I had to walk around the city remembering a life we planned together but wouldn't have anymore. I have to keep on living knowing that that the man I loved didn't choose me when I really fucking needed him to."

At this point, I wasn't trying to keep track of my tears or my words. I just needed that out of my chest so I could be free. I was so tired of carrying these in my heart that even if it hurt, it was freeing.

"So it would be so fucking unfair to me if I just walked back into this," I say as I wipe my face with the back of my hand. "I can't do this to myself again. No matter how much a big part of me still cares about you. I deserve better. I have to choose myself because you clearly didn't."

He didn't say anything at that because there wasn't anything that could be said. Both of us knew that I was right.

Seeing him cry was like picking at an open wound, it made me feel even worse. But, what else could I do? I could feel this eating me up inside and I couldn't look past all the suffering I went through just because he showed up again.

"Loving someone isn't enough to keep a relationship going. You have a lot to do and you didn't, you really didn't. So I'm sorry if I can't just pretend to be okay with everything after a few hours spent together after a few months."

"You think you're the only one suffering in this? I lost you and I had to wake up in our bed every day. I had to be in this apartment knowing that the person who made it a home wasn't going to return. And that no matter what I did or who came by, it was never going to be the same."

His confession made my heart clench but he brought this upon himself. It wasn't me who gave up on it.

"And who's to blame for that?" I say looking into his eyes.

"I know. Don't you think I've blamed myself enough for that?  Because I did, for all the days that you have not been here. This is the first time in seven months when I have felt a sense of normalcy and that's because you're here. Don't you see that?"

Now that the bandaid was ripped once again, the both of us were in tears standing in the middle of the living room. The walls felt like they were getting closer and closer each second that passed.

"Did you know that Frankie came by on the third month? She gave me the TED talk of my life."

That caught your attention, Frankie has never mentioned that. At all.

"She told me that she knew that I wasn't good enough for you from the start, but that she had never expected me to be a shitty partner too. That she had never seen someone disrespect their girlfriend as much as I did without even knowing and that now that I was single the reason for my breakup pushed me aside for someone more interesting. So that not only was I trash for  how I treated you but I was also dumb for not seeing it."

His words come as a shock to you. With shaking hands and deep breaths, you look around the room trying to focus on something that isn't his red face.

"And she's not wrong, you know? And I was also a coward for never coming to you and watching your life on the sidelines."

At this point, I was feeling the huge urge to sob. My hands were sweaty, my tears were not even drying in my face as new ones came down.

"So I'm sorry, okay? I'm so fucking sorry for it. But please, don't say that I didn't care enough about you. Because I did."

His words keep ringing in my ear for a while as I try to place my thoughts correctly. Seven months ago I thought that it would be the last time I would see him and then I'd be able to heal and move on, but now seeing him and hearing everything was bringing a new wave of unaddressed feelings that I have not dealt with yet.

"I can't." A whisper comes out of my lips after a while. "And you have to understand why I can't do this again. I can't ignore everything."

He looks at me with his lips trembling as his tears keep on falling down his face. In the walls of this apartment now the only sound that rang was defeat. This was a lost cause and no matter what happened, both of us would be losing today. 

"I'm sorry, Drew. I really am, but there's nothing that can be done anymore. " I declare as I finally feel like he might let me go. "I hope you find someone who's ready and brave enough to love you through it all, you deserve to be loved and the times that I felt genuinely loved by you were the greatest. That person just won't be me."

Like the first time, months ago, I turned towards the front door and walked out.  Knowing that he would not follow me and that whatever had remained seven months and thirteen days ago, was completely over this time. Even if a huge part of me kept screaming at me to forgive him, I knew I couldn't. Not only it wouldn't be fair to me but I knew what would happen. Of course she wasn't as present in his life anymore, she completely isolated him from any potential significant other he could have. And if we got back together, the cycle would repeat itself and I would never put myself in a situation where I had to fight for someone's attention just to be tossed aside as if I was nothing. 

In this story, there was ever only one winner and it wasn't either Drew or I. 

💖taglist💖: @emmaafinchh @rafecamerons-national-anthem @bvleeeeeee @a-j-stuffs @maybankslover @lovelylove268 @cooper8224 @esquivelbianca @dreamybabbyy @lulubabii @idiotussupremus @drewsphswife @ietss @noneofyabuisnezs @chenslucy @yvbe99 @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @theeternaloptimistt @roselibrary @daddydraco0 @iheartcats444 @allopathi

[nishimuraazr1zzkiii]

▸Blushy cheeks◂ ๋࣭ ⭑Y. Jw

🐇

༘⋆pairings: yang jungwon x reader

.ᐟwarnings: mentions reader biting jungwon's cheeks lovingly,

₊⊹notes: got this idea from a tiktok saying that jungwon had naturally rosy cheeks and it was in is family genes so his mother and sister has it too🧍‍♀️

Jungwon fiddled with his keys, trying to hastily open the door since his exhaustion was creeping up on him, eyes drooping as he dropped his keys. He let out a sigh, pushing his hair away from his eyes while he grabbed his keys from the ground.

His day wasn't the best. The day started off bad when he woke up late for rehearsal, and you weren't by his side, you were out to get groceries. Next, his clothes were wet since he forgot to dry them last night because he fell asleep as soon as he hit the bed and forgot to remind you. He than couldn't find his bag for rehearsal, making him more late by 30 minutes and getting scolded by their choreographer since he kept making mistakes. He couldn't even face time you since his phone had died in the middle of practice which made him incredibly annoyed.

After his tiring day, he wanted to lay down with you while watching the drama series you two were currently watching. When he finally got the door opened, he was greeted by the sight of you smiling at him while you wore your apron, indicating that you finished cooking dinner.

"Welcome home wonie! How has your day been? I've already cooked dinner for both of us" taking off your apron before running up to jungwon to greet him with a warm hug. Seeing him sigh and lazily reciprocate your hug makes your lips frown. Knowing his day would start off terribly when you left the house since he couldn't spend time with you as soon as he woke up, but you hoped it wouldn't be so bad.

Ruffling his hair when he didn't reply to you, just sighing in the crook of your neck. "Won~ why don't you eat before you fall asleep on me, I Already prepared everything. " jungwon sluggishly pulled away from you and slowly walked to the kitchen counter and started to eat slowly, you see his eyes droop each time he takes a bite of the food. "... How was your day? Did something interesting happen, won? " you try and lighten up Jungwons mood. "

"... Today was the worst. Everything went wrong, and every little Thing irritated me." jungwon continued to rant to you about how his day wasn't the best day he experienced, all the while you just sat next to him, listening him talk to you about his day.

"Well, the day is almost over now, and you can rest now. Do you wanna continue watch the series we're watching?" You suggest to jungwon while he finished the bite of his food before putting the empty plate inside the sink.

"Yes please" jungwon muttered out as he walked back to you, hugging you tightly before gently pulling you to the couch to watch the series you wanted to watch.

.

.

.

You layed on the couch while jungwon was laying on your chest, his eyes drooping while you both watched one of your favorite series all the while you stroked his hair gently, coaxing him to sleep, your steady heartbeat lulling him to sleep.

Halfway of the episode, you shuffled jungwon so you could be more comfortable and so would jungwon, but as you tried to move his body that was heavier and bigger than yours, you noticed how limp his body was against your chest, his lips slightly parted as his cheeks were smushed on your chest. Your heart melted at the sight of jungwon asleep on you, finally resting after a Rocky and hard day so you just let him be and adjust the pillow to support your neck and back before turning your attention back to jungwon, admiring his features, his lips, his lashes that were competing with yours in length, and your most favorite part of his face(besides his lips) his rosy cheeks. You never noticed it since it was super subtle, but his cheeks were lightly blushed on with a lightly pink dust.

You slightly remember jungwon mentioning how his mom has naturally rosy cheeks and so did his sister and he wasn't sure if he had rosy cheeks, you didn't even notice his natural pink cheeks since it was barely noticeable, and wasn't even more noticeable when he wore make up.

Jungwon's eyes twitched when he felt a hand caress his cheek gently, his eyes opened to see you smilling at him. "Slept well, won? Your cheeks are so cute!" You coo at jungwon as his eyes were drooping, still staring at you.

His hand reaches to hold onto your wrist "mm...y'er so pretty baby~" jungwon muffled out as his face was resting on your chest, his cheeks getting squished by your chest making his words becoming slurred.

You gently pinched jungwon cheeks making him push your hand away from his cheeks. "Stop pinchng my cheeks, baby~" he whined while you just giggled. "But your cheeks are so squishy, won~ they even have a pink color to them"

Jungwon's cheeks turned red as he buried his face in your chest again. "We-well, mom and my sister has it... " jungwon's voice trailed off. "How come I don't notice them? " you say with a slightly frown on your lips.

"Maybe since its always covered by my make up and it's really faint, you have to really get in my face to see it, and of course I won't let anyone but you and/or maybe the member to get so close in my face since why-" before jungwon could ramble why no one but you and the members could be so close to to his face, he was interrupted by you gently biting his cheeks.

"AHH! [NAME]?! WHY DID YOU BITE MY CHEEKS?! " jungwon sat up and held his cheeks that were bitten by you. "Hehe~ sorry, won, but your cheeks were so adorably squishy I couldnt resist biting them, I'm sorry, won~" you apologized to jungwon as he sat in front of you, still holding his cheek that you bit into, leaving a faint bite mark.

Jungwon rubbed his cheek as he stared at you with furrowed brows and a slight frown while you leaned closer to jungwon and pressing a light kiss on the spot you bit. "I'm sorry, won, did I bite to hard?" You rubbed his cheeks with your thumb as he leaned into your hand, shaking his head gently to your question. "I was just shocked you bit my cheeks...that's the first time someone did that to me." You let out a soft laugh as jungwon relaxed his body and layed ontop of you, his drowsiness returning. "We should head to bed, jungwon" you whispered while jungwon stayed still ontop of you, his eyes closed. "I'm tired, let's stay here for a bit, plus we haven't finished the series yet" jungwon mumbled out as he opened one eye to look at the TV, you sighed as jungwon didn't move so you put your hands on jungwon's head, stroking his hair gently as the two of you continued watching the series.

Extra notes: k so maybe I was gone for a few months, maybe even a year, but I'm trying to slowly come back, I have a lot of drafts rn so I just need to do them plus exams are coming up. I'll try to upload more🤞

Taglist: @thelost-in-time

Wanna get notified everytime I post? Send an ask or a comment to get added to the taglist!

[siriusgoneserious]

to be a better boyfriend

a/n: uh so not the best thing ever and this did not turn out like i wanted to but i had no energy to rewrite sooo this is the result of all the lyrason reqs in my anons and isn't based on one single bc like i said idk what i wrote myself.

words: 1,150

ships: lyra x grayson

enjoy ig-

Grayson Hawthorne was positively upset. Walking back to their apartment, hand in hand, Grayson still could not shake off the strange feeling of anger he felt when those random guys were flirting with Lyra.

He wasn't even paying attention while Lyra was telling him about a random incident that happened when she was 11.

He shook off his hand intertwined with Lyras' and instead snaked his hand around her waist and rested it possessively on her lower back.

He definitely wasn't jealous, why would he be jealous? Grayson was Lyra's boyfriend after all, not those unoccupied loafers roaming the streets harassing every girl they saw.

Grayson broke out of his trance when Lyra snapped her fingers in front of his face as he had not picked up her constantly calling his name.

"Were you even listening to what I was saying." Lyra remarked.

"Oh, my mind was somewhere else."

"Clearly." Lyra replied dryly.

"What were you saying?"

"Never mind, it wasn't that important."

"No, it was. Everything you say is important."

"You be honest with me, are you genuinely thinking about those guys who were testing their overused pickup lines on me."

Grayson's eyes wandered around to meet anything that weren't Lyra's amber orbs. "No, of course not. That would be so stupid."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night Grayson, you're forgetting that I know you very well."

"I'm not thinking about that." Grayson continued to insist his lies.

"If you don't want to talk about that, then sure. But you should know that I have standards and eyes only for you."

They both entered their apartment and Grayson closed the door from the behind, silently cursing how Lyra knew him so well.

She was right anyways, he should not dwell his mind to ponder over such unimportant matters. At least that was what he decided.

But needless to say, his brain did not stop revolving around the incident and when it was midnight and Lyra had long gone to sleep, Grayson would be highly reluctant to admit to anyone that he took out his phone and began searching. 

He clicked on the first website that appeared relevant to his query and skimmed through its content while making up scenarios in his mind about them. 

Would they even work...

He glanced towards Lyra sleeping peacefully on his right and for a while was caught off guard by her beauty. 

Her full lips slightly parted open and a few strands of hair were landed on her cheek which with a gentle movement of his hand, Grayson parted away. The right side of her face was illuminated by the moonlight entering through the open window and Grayson had to contain himself to not hold her close to him. He could count all the freckles on her nose if he leaned in closer-

Oh god, this girl would be the end of him.

He sighed and turned his phone off, lowering his body under the blanket to rest his own body and Lyra's face was the last thing he saw before he closed his eyes into darkness.

The next day was a Sunday so both Lyra and Grayson were present at home. It was a regular breakfast morning before Grayson decided to speak whatever had been going on in your mind.

"You look very pretty." 

Lyra stared at him, "Pretty? While I'm still in my night dress without my hair brushed?"

Grayson mentally facepalmed himself; he knew he shouldn't have said this.

"...You look pretty anytime, sweetheart."

Lyra chuckled as she flipped the omelet from the frying pan, "What's with you and these compliments."

"Can a man not compliment his beautiful girlfriend?"

"Yes he can, but these came out of nowhere and right now I feel suspicious."

"You're being dramatic, sweetheart, I have no intentions but the best."

Lyra eyed him suspiciously before saying, "If you say so." 

She then gave him his prepared breakfast and headed towards the table with her own cup of coffee.

"Do you have any plans for today?" Lyra asked him after a while.

"No sweetheart, all my day is for you and you only."

Lyra burst out laughing, "Why are you acting so flirty, Gray? It's so uncanny, did you stay up all night watching cheesy romance movies?"

"What's so wrong in being flirty?" Grayson smirked slightly.

Lyra moved closer to Grayson, "There's nothing wrong, but this," she tapped the tip of his nose lightly, "is highly out of character for you Mr. Hawthorne. Are you trying to seduce me with this behaviour?"

"Depends... Is it working?"

"Hm well, I think you'll have to try better than that." And with that Lyra got up from her chair and gathered the dirty dishes heading towards the sink as Grayson contemplated his own attitude.

.

"So that's why you've been behaving weird all day. Oh, you're unbelievable Grayson Hawthorne." Lyra said in a loud voice to no one but herself and Grayson sitting in the room.

Grayson gave her a confused look and his mouth turned into a small 'O' as Lyra showed him the screen on her phone which had "how to be a better boyfriend" searched on it.

He had completely forgotten that Lyra had his account logged in on her phone since a few days for work purposes. Shit. And his search history had shown up on her phone too.

"How to be a better boyfriend huh? Why do you even think you're not good enough in the first place." Lyra put down her phone and turned to face Grayson.

"It wasn't that-"

"Then what was it? You know I fell in love with the Grayson you are, not a Reddit made flirt."

"I just want to be better and more interesting for you, sweetheart."

"You are perfect to me." She said to him with her eyes reflecting sincerity.

Lyra got onto Grayson's lap and straddled it, "But I must say, I like you better when you're like this." She then brought Grayson's hands to her waist and her face millimeters away from his, smirking.

"Are you trying to seduce me now." 

Lyra pretended to think, "Depends, is it working?"

"You should know it works every single time."

And with that, Grayson was the one to close the distance between the two of them.

This was the feeling he could relate to the most, his lips pressed perfectly against Lyra's moving in sync, her fingers messing through his hair, and his hands moving underneath her shirt on her bare skin. Oh, she was a missing puzzle piece to him which he had connected to.

Screw those guys from yesterday.

Screw how to be a better boyfriend.

Screw those forced techniques to flirt.

To him this was better than everything.

[blackjackkent]

As I mentioned in my post last night, I love this cutscene between Minsc and Jaheira very much - and I also love the devnotes on it when looking through the parsed dialogue files, since they further emphasize all the things I love about these characters and their relationship.

So I have compiled all of it here because I need you all to experience the Emotions with me. XD

-----

MINSC: Jaheira... Boo is trying his best to explain, but I still do not understand your anger. (Devnote: Hesitant, a little apologetic - wants to get it but doesn't.) JAHEIRA: Do not hide behind your hamster, ranger. You do not understand, because you do not listen. We were the first to discover the cult. And if you had only waited, we might have marshalled our numbers and - MINSC: Good does not wait for evil to button up its britches - when it offers buttocks for the smacking, Minsc and Boo greet cheek with hand! (Devnote: Quietly scandalised at the notion that he should have stopped and waited for reinforcements, rather than wading into incredible odds alone.) PLAYER: That sounds like a fun evening. MINSC: It is well that Boo's innocent ears still ring from all this shouting. (Devnote: A little offended - the player is being inappropriate in front of his hamster.)

-----

JAHEIRA: You meant well, Minsc. But you exposed the city to harm. You helped the cult spread. And worse, perhaps, than any of this: You forced me to leave you behind. MINSC: But... this is where Minsc falls short of the understanding, Jaheira. (Devnote: Puzzled - a little wary to contradict Jaheira but working it out.) What else is a berserker for, if not to charge into danger ahead of his Wychlaran? (Devnote: Genuinely bemused. He would happily throw away his life to protect Jaheira, and takes it for granted that she knows this.)

-----

MINSC: Boo agrees, you are a queer kind of witch. But this city is a queer place. And Minsc, you may have noticed, is sometimes strange himself. (Devnote: Tone is "I know it's strange, I agree, but hear me out.") The titles matter not. Only this - when Minsc does as Minsc does, and charges in to make a mess: (Devnote: Brushing aside Jaheira's discomfort with the title of 'wychlaran', getting to the point of what he means.) Jaheira does as Jaheira does, and finds a way to save us all anyway. (Devnote: Absolute unshakeable faith that Jaheira can and will solve any problem.) PLAYER: Aw. That's actually kind of sweet. JAHEIRA: ...I fight alongside fools. MINSC: You hear that, Boo? We fight alongside a Wychlaran again. (Devnote: Utterly unconcerned by the "fool" part, quietly excited by the "Jaheira fights alongside us again" part.)

-----

PLAYER: Speaking of feelings - does Minsc know you were ready to kill the Emperor for him? [INTIMIDATION DC10] [CHECK PASS] JAHEIRA: ...My own foolishness does not absolve Minsc of his. [CHECK FAIL] JAHEIRA: A sad and desperate bluff. I need to be sure that Minsc understands I cannot make such a threat twice. MINSC: I have already pledged my sword and hamster both. What more does Minsc have to give? (Devnote: At a loss.) JAHEIRA: Your word, ranger - that next time, you will stop and think. I will not always be here to tell you what to do. MINSC: If not here, then where? Wherever there is, Minsc and Boo will go too! My hamster... he would not be parted from you again, Jaheira. (Devnote: Heavy emphasis on 'there' in second phrase. Jaheira has suggested she won't be around forever - Minsc won't hear of it. The last is the closest he gets to sincerely telling her how much he missed her.) JAHEIRA: ...I missed him, too. And try as you might, I know you have not missed my point as neatly as you pretend.

[yuomizuu]

⋆.˚ ᰔ . to be with you, is to sit in autumn sunlight !

[ kazuha. ] — just a couple of random hcs that suddenly came to me! it has truly been a hot minute since my last post but regardless, hope you enjoy the zuha brain rot folks ^3^

w.c: 945

➴ kaedehara kazuha.

if there’s anything that kazuha enjoys doing—apart from writing poetry, resting upon a warm rock, or indulging himself in a bit of sake—it’s your presence.

whether it’s taking a leisure stroll through the streets of liyue together or simply listening you talk to your heart’s content, kazuha finds your company to be as pleasant as a gentle autumn breeze. when the alcor is buzzing with an endless revelry that continues on into the late hours of the night, kazuha will seek you out, quietly taking your hand and leading you elsewhere, away from the festivities to instead pursue a secret rendezvous of your own.

if he’s not particularly keen on leaving the ship, then he’ll steal a bottle of sake and two cups and instead bring you up to the ship’s nest, enjoying each other’s company as you both silently admire the rolling ocean waves across the horizon.

but it’s also important to remember that kazuha is someone who enjoys his own solitude from time to time as well. therefore, his most prominent forms of love languages would probably fall into words of affirmation. you recall the time beidou had referred to his manner of speaking as having flowers come out of his mouth instead of actual words and honestly, you would have to agree. countless times has this charming wanderer left you with nothing but a racing heart and a hue of rose tinted cheeks from just a few cherry-picked lines.

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

“the sunlight is bright, the leaves are vibrant and yet, your eyes, your smile… when you look at me in this moment, the brilliance of flowers and daylight seem dull, as if i’m staring into the heart of a blooming star.”

“… kazuha!? where did that come from all of sudden??”

“hmm… just thinking of some lines to use in my next poem dove.”

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

kazuha will seldom chose to call/refer to you by your actual given name, not because he finds it awkward, but he simply prefers to use his own terms of endearments with you. the most frequent of which being ‘my love’ and ‘dove,’ however don’t be surprised if he suddenly throws in a new one into the mix. the times in which your name is spoken by his lips are the quietude moments beneath the viel of stars at night in which he recites poems to you in your honor or softly proclaims vows of forever being yours.

each time the young ronin prepares to set off on another journey, ready to follow wherever the winds take him, he leaves a token of himself with you. this token can end up being a variety of things: an item he procured on his previous travels, a simple flower or leaf ( though to him, they are anything but simple ), or even the red tassel on him with the ornamental maple leaf where his vision is tied to. whatever it is you end up receiving, it serves as a reminder that even though he may travel great distances, he will always return to you.

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

“they do say that distance makes the heart grow fonder.. so you need not worry my love. a part of me will always be with you, but i can only be complete if i am by your side.”

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

as if the token itself weren’t enough, kazuha will undoubtedly continue to keep in touch with you via written letters. he does this special thing where depending on the nation he’s currently traveling in, he’ll pick a local plant speciality and seal it with wax to the envelope — a way of letting you know where he was in the world. sometimes he’ll simply muse to you about his travels, writing about all the wonderful sights he’s seen and is certain you would enjoy. on days when kazuha is missing you more so than usual, his letters will consist of haikus/poems centered around you or just going on a lover’s tangent about how much he adores you.

you also write to him, and of course, kazuha finds immense happiness each time he receives your letters. if he’s having a hard time falling asleep at night, he’ll read through your letters, hoping your words alone will manage to lull his restless mind to sleep ( and they do ). back home, he’ll fold them into origamis in order to preserve them and from that alone he’s able to recognize what letter of yours it was in and what you’d written in particular. ( beidou is constantly finding random origamis scattered around her ship sometimes www )

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

“hey [name], mind giving this to kazuha and reminding him not to misplace them around the ship unless he wants a drunken sailor stepping on them?”

· · ────── ꒰ঌ·♡·໒꒱ ────── · ·

when the time of your fateful reunion finally arrives, it feels akin to a homecoming for kazuha ( although he would argue that it is exactly that because well.. you are his home ). the moment he sets foot onto the familiar grounds of liyue, his eyes seek you out instantly, knowing that you would be waiting for him just like you always do. some days he’ll surprise you, silently walking up from behind and wrapping his arms around your waist, burying his face into your neck and planting a series of kisses — ones that are so gentle and feather-like, it felts as though a butterfly had landed there. slowly, they’ll trail up until he reaches your ears where he whispers to you his greeting and how happy he is to see you.

you can most definitely expect to be showered in all his love and attention for the next few days so hopefully you won’t find yourself tiring of him too quickly :)

[fruvittea]

whispers in the rain part three ✧˚ · .

— ✺ pairing: jay x reader x jake

— ✺ genre: slice of life, angst, suggestive, fluff, childhood best friend, love triangle, college au, slow burn

—✺ synopsis: jay is your childhood best friend. that’s all he will ever be. a summer with jay and his friends changes how you feel for him when jake comes into your life. and jay begins to think that was a mistake.

—✺ warnings: also the members are aged up a bit, specifically niki, so he can have alcohol LOL

—✺ word count: 1.8k

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | ...

The vacation was in full swing, and Jay was happy—genuinely happy. He watched you laugh with Jake during breakfast, the two of you whispering about some inside joke from your trip to town the day before. You look radiant, your eyes shining with a sort of joy he hadn’t seen in a while. And for some reason he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. 

She’s finally having fun, he thought to himself, and the warmth of pride settled in his chest. You deserved this. You deserved to branch out, to meet people who made you smile the way Jake did.

The rest of the group buzzed with excitement about their plans for the night. “Let’s hit the bars downtown,” Jungwoo suggested, scrolling through his phone. “I found this place with live music that looks pretty fun.”

Niki, ever the instigator, clapped his hands. “Finally! Time to turn up.”

Everyone agreed eagerly, including you, and before long, the house was alive with the sound of showers running, music blasting, and the chaos of young adults rifling through their suitcases for the perfect outfit. 

Jay didn’t think much about the preparations until you emerged from your room. He was leaning against the counter, scrolling through his phone, when he glanced up and froze.

—

You had been having so much fun while on vacation. Being in a place you have never been before. With people you are beginning to know. It all has been wonderful—sun drenched mornings, lazy afternoons, and laughter filled nights. And tonight you were going out and having fun. But something felt off. 

Jake is so incredible—funny, kind, and so attentive it made your chest ache. He has a way of making you feel seen, his compliments coming so naturally. You couldn’t help but wonder if he memorized them or not. You couldn’t remember the last time someone had made you feel this special. 

And yet, there was a nagging thought in the back of your mind that refused to leave. 

You haven't spent much time with Jay. The whole reason you said yes to even going on this vacation. It was Jay. 

It wasn’t for lack of trying. He’d been around, always somewhere in the background, but things were different. Normally, the two of you would find little moments just for yourselves, creating a bubble that on one else could break into. Now with this trip, it had popped. He seemed content staying on the sidelines, happy to let Jake take over. 

It wasn’t like you wanted Jay to monopolize your time, but his absence felt strange. Unsettling. You…missed him.

Still, Jake made it hard to dwell on that too long. He had a way of drawing you in, whether it was with his quick wit or the way that he listened so intently whenever you spoke. He made you feel lighter, freer, and you couldn’t help but bask in his attention. 

But tonight wasn’t the night to focus on such things. Everyone had agreed to go out, you wanted to have fun and you spent more time getting ready than usual, carefully perfecting your look. A leopard print top that hugged your figure, a black mini skirt, and slim black boots with a thin heel. You took your time scrolling through Pinterest trying to figure out what makeup look to do until finalizing on a sultry smokey makeup look that was just enough for tonight. To save yourself time from curling your hair, you simply straighten it, letting it fall down your back. 

You gave yourself one last look in the mirror, put on some lipstick, and walked out into the living room where Jay was leaning against the counter waiting for everyone to come out their rooms. 

—

Jay blinked twice. 

He watched you straighten your skirt and adjust your bag. 

“Is it too much?” The nervousness in your voice made him take a deep breath in. Your eyes sparkled with your makeup. 

“Wow, y/n you look amazing,” Jungwon said, breaking the silence. You looked to your right to see him dressed in a simple black button up tucked into black pants with a belt. “Don’t worry you didn’t do too much, it is perfect.” He flashed you a smile putting his hand on your back before making his way to the living room. 

The whole time Jay had his eyes on you and couldn’t help but have a slight reaction to Jungwon’s flirtatious hand placement. He swallowed hard, quickly looking away. His mind wrestled with the thought that popped up unbidden: She looks beautiful. He shook it off. Of course you looked beautiful. You always did. That wasn’t new. What was new was the tight feeling in his chest, the inexplicable urge to tell you to stay home. He ignored it. 

“Yeah it’s not too much. You look good.” He said. 

“Alright, are we ready? The Uber is on it’s way!” Sunoo flashed his phone before making his way to the front door.

“Wait, I thought someone was driving?” You turned to go to the door.

“Pfft, no, we all wanna have fun tonight.” Niki gave you a wink before following Sunoo out the door. 

—

The streets were alive with the energy of the summer nightlife. Strings of lights adorned the lampposts, and music spilled out of every bar you all walked passed. The group was all smiles, dressed to impress and ready to have a good time. 

After a bit of wandering Heesung found the bar with live music and snagged a table near the stage. The bang was setting up, and the air buzzed with anticipation. 

Jake, ever the gentleman, pulled out a chair for you. You thanked him with a smile that Jay couldn’t help but notice lingered a second too long. The group ordered drinks, laughing and shouting over the noise as they debated what to get. Jay stuck to beer, while you opted for a fruity cocktail that came in a ridiculous glass. 

“Cheers to the best summer yet.” Sunghoon raised his glass.

“Cheers!” Everyone echoed clinking glasses. 

The band started playing, and the music was infectious. It wasn’t long before people were swaying in their seats or getting up to dance. Jake leaned in closer to you, his arm brushing yours as he pointed out something about the band’s ead guitarist. The way he leaned in to whisper jokes, his breath warm against your ear, made your cheeks flush. 

But even as you laughed, your eyes kept drifting to Jay. 

He was quieter than usual, sticking close to Jungwonn and Sunoo, his playful demeanor subdued. You couldn’t help but steal a few glances of him from across the table, the way his eyes lingered on the band playing, his fingers drumming his glass like he was lost in thought. 

Little did you know, Jay caught the little interactions between you and Jake from the corner of his eye. Jake wasn’t doing anything wrong—he was being a friend, perhaps a little more friendly to his liking, but still he wasn’t doing anything wrong and for some reasons he couldn’t stop watching. 

Sunoo nudged him. “You good Jay?”

Jay blinked, realizing he hasn’t said much in a while. “Yeah, just enjoying the music.”

Sunoo gave him a knowing look but didn’t press further. 

—

As the night went on, the drinks flowed, and everyone got a little tipsy. The shy inhibitions that had lingered earlier were gone now, replaced by laughter and the occasional bold move. The boys had gone all over the place, chatting it up with strangers, and ordering more drinks at the bar. 

Meanwhile Jake and you were laughing as something together not leaving the table ever since you entered the bar. And then he leaned in, his lips closed to your ear.

“I forgot to mention how beautiful you look tonight.” His voice so low only you could hear. 

“Don’t make me laugh Jake, thats the alcohol talking.” You turn you head to meet his eyes. 

“Partially so, but hey, drunk words are sober thoughts.” His smile sends a shiver down your spine. You couldn’t help but turn away bashfully as he reassured you he meant what he said. 

Out of your view was Jay sitting at the bar sipping on his second beer. Jay’s jaw clenched. “You’ve been staring at them for the last ten minutes,” Jungwon said, sliding into the seat next to him.

“What? No I haven’t.”

“You have,” Jungwon said plainly, sipping his drink. “You’re happy for her, right?” That she’s having fun?”

“Of course I am,” Jay’s response was immediate. Too immediate. 

“Hmm.”

Jay turned to him, frowning. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jungwon shrugged. “Nothing. Just…it’s funny how you’re the only one not having fun right now.”

Jay opened his mouth to argue, but Jungwon was already walking away to an almost drunk Heesung and Niki, leaving him with his thoughts. Jay downed his drink before quickly asking for another. 

He tried to focus on the band, on the rhythm of the music, on anything but the way Jake’s hand rested on the back of your chair or the way your laugh seemed louder when Jake was the one making you smile.

It’s fine, he told himself. He just missed his best friend a bit and that was all. This is what what you wanted. She’s finally branching out.

—

At some point, you excused yourself to go to the restroom. Jay saw his chance and followed, waiting just outside the hallway leading to the restrooms. When you emerged he caught your arm gently. 

“Hey, you okay Jay?” You smiled as you felt his hand reach for you. 

“Yeah, yeah of course! Are you okay?” He asked. 

You looked at him, surprised. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

He hesitated. “I just…you’ve been spending a lot of time with Jake. I wanted to make sure he’s not, you know, making you uncomfortable or anything.”

You tilted your head, studying him. Was this his jealous way of saying he missed you? “Jay, Jake’s been great. Why would you think he’s making me uncomfortable? 

“I don’t know. I just…I worry about you.”

You smiled softly, and for a moment, Jay felt like the two of you were back in high school, just you and him against the world. 

“I’m fine Jay. You don’t need to worry about me so much.” 

But I do, he wanted to say. The words hovered on his tongue, unspoken. Instead, he nodded, stepping aside to let you slip past him. You put a reassuring hand on his forearm giving it a gentle squeeze before making your way back to the empty seat beside Jake. He watched as you walked back to your seat, where Jake was waiting with that easy smile of his. 

Jay stayed in the hallway for a moment, leaning against the wall and taking a deep breath.

Maybe Jungwon was right. Maybe he wasn’t as okay with this as he thought.