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tachosnachos · 3 years

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LONG POST AHEAD

Hi guys! I’m glad a lot of people are enjoying my not-so-relevant reviews of the F4 series. I’ll get to answering comments just as soon as I fix my laptop (Fucking apple ugh)

Discussions are encouraged here! Please, please do. I would really like to hear your thoughts on the new series. What we are not going to do, however, is fan wars. NO FAN WARS. Please for the love of christ.

If you are a fan of brightxwin your opinion is valid. If you ship gorya and ren, your opinion is also valid. But please don’t berate, insult or disrespect a person just for having different views with you. I feel like I have to do this because unfortunately, from my experience of reviewing other drama (remember true beauty and start up. Smh. That was hell), I think I have the responsibility to remind everyone to be respectful. With peace and love. F4 is a fictional story. No matter how much you love these characters and fantasise them in your head, they are fictional. No point in wasting your energy fighting over fictional characters. Debate in respectful way.

Alright. With that out of the way. Let’s get on to the real juicy thing.

ml= male lead, fl= female lead, sl=second lead

So I watched this series with my baby cousin the other day (he’s not a baby, but he’ll always be a baby to me) and he’s the kind of person who shows all their emotions when they are watching. You know the kind who screams at the screen because the ml or fl is doing something stupid. Obviously his initial reaction was to hate Thyme and love Ren. He asked me if Thyme’s character will develop and I honestly told him I had no idea. At this point it was only the first two episodes but Thyme has proved so much after that two.

What’s funny is that I used to love Ren’s character in all the other versionas well because…well…if you’ve seen the other versions then you’ll know that Thyme’s character is frustratingly possessive and manipulative. So, naturally you gravitate to the other man. I don’t usually get second lead syndrome, I try not to, but this franchise is kinda an exception. I’ve been watching this as young as 6 years old, started with the Taiwan Meteor Garden and then the Japanese one, then korean, Shang Hai and finally thailand. Looking back, not sure why I didn’t like the male lead when all my babysitters who I forced to watch with me was all for the main ship. Maybe I was already a baby feminist in the making.

I guess what I’m trying to say is everyone always love the second lead first. But this? This series is hands down so different than the others.Where do I begin?

What’s frustrating about the other versions was the lack of communication, the lack of transparency between the two characters. Why can’t they just say how they feel? Why are they so frustratingly prideful? And why is she always belittling him or downplaying how she feels for him. We get it he bullied you, how long are you going to hang it over his head? In real life, their relationship won’t ever work out. The whole thing where ml was mad at fl and sl thing was so confusing in so many ways. Like what right did he have? when did she agree to this so called relationship? With the Thailand series, they gave Thyme and Gorya so much time to get to know each other and for Thyme to realise that he has fallen madly in love with Gorya that you almost have to get mad with Thyme when the fight with Gorya and Ren comes.

Just think about it. Thyme is trying so hard to get closer to Gorya, to get to know her and her life. Going as far as to coming to her house because he was curious to know about her when it is far from his usual character. Like he said, he doesn’t chase after a person unless he thinks that person is special. To Thyme, Gorya is special. She is his light in the dark world the weight of his family name put him in. He broke so many boundaries just to get closer to her. You can tell in the way he’s around Gorya, he jokes about her but he’s gentle about it. Almost like he’s scared that if he did one mistake, he would lose her. Probably why he kept repeating he was sorry like he was desperate for her forgiveness. Even though she didn’t verbally say it, he knew she forgave him when she leaned into his chest, cried and let him take her away. The look of relief on his face knowing he gained her trust again. BRIGHT IS SUCH AN AMAZING ACTOR I CAN’T EVEN.

“If you are far from me that’s an issue. I need you by my side.” YUM. FUCKING DELICIOUS.

They made Thyme into such a complex character and I admit, I am a sucker for complex characters, misunderstood characters or whatever you want to call them. I came in ready to cry for the second lead and then they gave me a little puppy boy who just wants a little love. Of course I’d root for him. They made him so self-aware of his ugly nature, they made him hate the person he was and I can only hurt thinking about the pain this series will put him through because of his mother. I thought the korean ml mother was scary, this one is scarier. Why? Because she speaks english 😂 jk (but really, she was really scary when she went on that tangent about firing employees) She keeps her words minimal, actions minimal. The only look on her face is either approval or disapproval. No wonder Thyme feels suffocated around her.

Now back to Ren and Gorya. The reason why I’m saying that I almost side with Thyme all the time in this series is because of how hard he has worked to even stand by Gorya’s side. Just when he thought he finally had her it all came crashing down the second Ren came. Now her attention is divided. If he’s not insecure already, he will be because he already put Ren on such a high pedestal and thought of him as someone Thyme could only dream to be. He already thinks that Gorya is better off with Ren than him, that’s why he says nothing when Ren is mentioned. Only watching her silently while his heart breaks to pieces 💔 You could see the confusion in his face, whether to be happy that his best friend came home or scared that there’s yet another threat to his and Gorya’s relationship, as if it’s not hard as it is. I’m actually about to cry.

Just thinking about how he would do anything and everything just to show Gorya how much he cared, to be so vulnerable in front of her and to desperately do anything to try to one up Ren. Then all Ren had to do was flash a sad smile to Gorya for her to come running back. In Gorya’s head, she was just being her usual selfless self. She would’ve probably done it whether it was Ren or anyone else but for Thyme it’s probably a terrifying thing to let her run to her first love. If I’m right with the timeline (spoiler alert) then we would most likely see a Gorya x Ren kiss scene in front of Thyme and MY HEART IS BREAKING JUST AT THE THOUGHT OF THAT. But that’s okay, because they will come out as strong as ever. Stronger than any of the other couples.

Side note, one thing I love from the korean series was the side couple. Kimbum was so…DROP DEAD GORGEOUS. I was mostly watching the series for those two. I really hope this series could give me that feeling once more with Kavin and Kaning. The chinese version was so dull and boring but let’s hope thailand won’t disappoint.

Next, I’m thinking of doing an in dept review of all the other version and rank them from top to last. But I might have to rewatch the Japanese and Taiwan one because that was far too long ago.

#f4 thailand #thyme x gorya

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marimopeace · 3 years

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there's a limit on how much you can be an isekai intellectual...

a bunch of analyses have been popping up before me all day so i wanted to throw my hat into the ring. all love to ppl who are exercising their creative minds + ppl like geoff here who just talk about these things because of fan interest but i feel like there reaches a point where exploring the "types" of isekai is pointless? i've seen ppl list out the different types of villainess revenge isekai or fantasy mmorpg isekai but eh why fit them all into separate boxes like that?

i think it's easier to think of isekai as a "type" (genre) of itself with only two categories: 1) a focus on isekai (lit. another world) 2) tensei (lit. to be reborn). this allows for a variety of applications and thus tropes that ppl see so many trends of!

with isekai - in another world

you see everything from:

pure fantasy (inuyasha, digimon wait maybe not the best example but in my childhood mind i count digimon as pure fantasy, fushigi yugi)

mmorpg inspired fantasy/adventure (.hack//legend of twilight, sao ugh, log horizon, overlord (LOVE OVERLORD!)

otome game-esque worlds >>> this is where it gets complicated with "villainess routes" since i admit there are multiple villainess tropes but this is why it's nice to not think of this as a "sub-type/genre" bc it frees you from those complications! (the saint's magic power is omnipotent, the white cat's revenge as plotted from the dragon king's lap soso cute!, the savior's book cafe in another world, i'm a villainous daughter so i'm going to keep the last boss wait i can't remember if she's reborn in this one lmaooo see this is why rules make everything hard)

with tensei storylines - being reincarnated/reborn in another world as *insert character/role*

you see...

the same tropes!!

pure fantasy (a returner's magic should be special, reminiscence adonis, the lady and the beast, light and shadow, i can't think of a manga off the top of my head for this ah)

mmorpg inspired fantasy/adventure (so i'm a spider so what i stan kumoko so hard, her majesty's swarm, can't name another off the top of my head ah i hate lists shorter than two things...)

self-insert based games/novels (fiance's observation log of a self-proclaimed villainess, who made me a princess, death is the only ending for the villainess, the villainess wants to marry a commoner, honestly games vs novels are different applications but i'm not in the headspace to try to remember a bunch of both lol)

*insert line break to give random ppl a break from scrolling but tl; dr just enjoy things for what they are no need to micro analyze*

similar variations occur in both genres (if ppl want to be super technical i guess i'm arguing that isekai itself is a massive genre that has the "another world" subgenre and "reincarnation" subgenre tl; dr) so i think it's honestly a huge pain to try to separate all these trends into so many different types of stories. for me personally it's easier to not get overwhelmed by this gigantic umbrella of "isekai" that spans light novels, manhwa, manga, and mobile games by just stripping each story down into its trademark tropes (aka character archetypes, story structures) and slapping "oh this is a person going to a world that's not ours" and "this person gets reborn as blank in another world". none of this "omg this power fantasy is such a this kind of isekai moment" or "there are 14 different types of villainess revenge stories and this series fits into this" bc AH labels! limitations! circle-jerks via ppl trying to compartmentalize everything and sound smart for leaving a comment on story analysis instead of ooh-ahhing over a character's face! dividing things into light novel manga vs manga vs korean manhwa ft. female characters!

the last bit is mainly why i feel frustrated by ppl's insistence to group everything?

the video linked at the beginning of the post (honestly good video essay, i enjoyed it, i just kept thinking in my head the whole time "marimo these are tropes do not take the genre talk literally") has a baby comment thread talking about "korean isekai manhwas" as a genre featuring nothing but reincarnated villainess' and i can't.

like i cannot acknowledge that as a genre of any sort. the energy i felt reading through some of those insights takes me back to 2012 when all yt americans discovered k-pop and deemed all korean music k-pop from then on! (ppl still do this now, yes you are seen and don't talk to me pls i don't like you. k-pop is korean pop music and nothing less and nothing more. take a few seconds and try to parse apart aspects of korean culture instead of slamming everything into a monolithic label that has the letter k and a hyphen.) it feels so odd to see a bunch of young ppl on ig and tiktok acknowledge korean media that happens to be in the form of a webtoon as "oh stories all about young girls becoming villains in stories they made/played" bc it feels so reductive u.u

(positionality disclaimer that i'm praying isn't actually necessary: i am a 3rd-generation korean of japanese descent do not fite me i am exhausted irl of ppl asking for validation/verification bc massive shove off.)

breaking news! korean manhwa...is just as multifaceted as japanese manga...bc how can comics as an art-form not have multiple genres...huh such a shocker?!?! same likely applies to media in other parts of the world like chinese manhwa and french comics--not my place to explain either of those i just know those industries exist bc of wakfu and donghua shows by Tencent.

at the end of the day it's not like analyzing any kind of isekai is wrong--absolutely not!! i think it can be super fun to think about how isekai elements complicate a story (MCs trying to go back home, ppl from the og world, reincarnation plot-twists) or maybe even bash a series for including some kind of other world element when they could have just written a super fun fantasy.

insert marimo's brief ramble that hey you can get sick of truck-kun's hitting disillusioned guys who happen to be super duper smart or girls who happen to be master chefs/craftsmen but transporting a fully-grown being into a fantasy setting is the ultimate cheat code for making mundane modern technology seem cool and overpowered, and being reincarnated as a fully grown person in a world with a pre-made story/game set-up completely bypasses the need for an author to slowly flesh out world-building in a natural progression so isekai is actually a really smart writing tool it's just that there are some series where the author didn't use it well at all and it's cheesy or clearly isekai was misused as a vehicle for character/story development and it was pointless *DEEP BREATH OUT*

in this essay i will argue...lol i am such a culture studies major!! if i were an english major i would be talking all about writing but here i am having a side-tangent about world-building via someone being reborn wow i love this for me (don't get me started on when an author has someone reincarnate as a baby and the story is mostly them having warm fluffy moments with their family--typically father figures--and getting lots of powers i could and would and probably will rant about east asian toxicity)

but anyway am i crazy????? like yes for being passionate about the technical use of a word like genre (i am a scorpio rising let me be fussy pls) but i don't think it's a lot to ask for ppl to not unironically see "villainess revenge isekai" as the definition of korean manhwa.

idk as someone who resonates with why japanese isekai is so popular domestically + why a lot of korean manhwa feat. the same tropes (it's not for great reasons lads it's actually depressing tbh) i'm just starting to feel kind of pained by the generalization and need to separate "cute japanese girl in an otome game"/"japanese boy finds a harem in another world" from "korean girl dies and comes back as a villainess" bc they are just! applications to the same story device!!

recommendations for any who makes it this far down below <3

// also gladly recommend any of the examples i've listed in the above rant as i've read/watched all of them and adore them v much! //

save me princess

super refreshing fantasy manhwa ft. a princess and her ex-boyfriend having to save the world!

the beginning after the end

an AMERICAN web novel turned into a comic (but see it being not korean/japanese doesn't really matter when you just consider isekai as a genre...isn't it nice to not overthink it?) ft. a super-powerful wizard king reincarnated into another world and starting from scratch--gives mushoku tensei vibes but huge twists!

the reason why raeliana ended up at the duke's mansion

love love LOVE this story--read the title and you'll learn how this girl reincarnated as the character raeliana in a book gets married to a duke!

trash of the count's family

such a good novel!! a guy gets reborn as a lazy oaf and he takes the hero of the story under his wing...plot twists come up later on!

this time i will definitely be happy!

v good and refreshing for a shorter series! she's been reborn 3 times and remembers every time the hero's stabbed her in the back, and now she just wants to break up with him!

silver diamond

older manga but v good adventure w intrigue! a boy who loves plants get sucked into a desert world with demonic lizards and a mysterious bodyguard by his side. shonen-ai not BL but wonderful vibes nonetheless + great side characters!

the princess imprints a traitor

adore everything in this from the world (not in that way this society makes me so angry) to the machinations at play and the dynamic between the fl and ml

#isekai #mother's basement #inuyasha #digimon #fushigi yugi #.hack//legend of the twilight #log horizon #overlord #the saint's magic power is omnipotent #the white cat's revenge as plotted from the dragon king's lap #a returner's magic should be special #adonis #the lady and the beast #light and shadow #kumo desu ga nani ka #her majesty's swarm #fiance's observation log of a self-proclaimed villainess #death is the only ending for a villainess #the villainess wants to marry a commoner #save me princess #the beginning after the end #the reason why raeliana ended up at the duke's mansion #trash of the count's family #this time i will definitely be happy!#silver diamond #see i normally put the raw titles for everything but the tiny korean/japanese part of my brain is so tired bc my english brain went off #the princess imprints a traitor #manga #manhwa #donghua

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luvreyn · 3 years

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My Manhwa List (2021) Part 6

Hi hi been a while! Hope you’re all okay so now onto the list ~

Your Majesty, Please Spare Me This Time

Source: https://www.tappytoon.com/en/comics/your-majesty

Description:

Following the emperor’s unjust massacre of her family and her own miserable death, Laliette Bellua wakes up to find that she is in the body of her 12-year-old self. She immediately sets her sights on a single goal: suck up to Emperor Rupert Edgar Laspe Vellelum and save her family. Laliette’s plan is foolproof, except for one tiny detail… In her present timeline, the future emperor is still masquerading as a princess named Rapertte! With only a single suitcase and some change in her pocket, she sets out for the capital to become the princess’s closest and most beloved attendant. Can Laliette prove her ability to keep a secret? And more importantly, will she be able to win the favor of the cruel and sadistic Rapertte?

THOUGHTS AND WHY YOU SHOULD READ

- mc is freaking adorable

- plot - 3.5/5

- art - 5/5

- she hates the ML sm omg like she often has thoughts of wanting to kill him and it’s so refreshing?? cause every fl in this type of story are like just scared so I love that she’s so scared but she also wants hurt him

- I know they’re gonna end up together but it’s nice to see her being so adamant and succeeding in hating him despite his sometimes humanity

- shookt at the revelations!!

- the ml... idk what to say about him but let’s hope he’ll freaking redeem himself

- conclusion: an okay read!

The Night When the Crow Caws

Source: https://www.tappytoon.com/en/comics/night-when-crow-caws

Description:

As the hottest actor in the action genre, the handsome and talented Woogang is always being chased by the women around him. But when a mysterious agent on a secret mission breaks into his home, he's the one who falls in love at first sight. Sadly, he has no clue who the beautiful stranger is... until she shows up at his workplace as Detective Park Taeyi to investigate a bomb threat. It turns out that she's no ordinary policewoman, but an elite member of the Secret Intelligence Agency who is after a criminal organization called "The Crows." Fate brings Woogang and Taeyi closer when the actor catches The Crows' attention and needs the agent's protection. Can Woogang break through Taeyi's cool exterior and win her heart as they face off against their dangerous enemies?

THOUGHTS AND WHY YOU SHOULD READ

- ml is kinda annoying tbh or idk maybe it’s just me

- badass female!!

- art = 4/5

- plot = ?/5 ‘cause I forgot lol

- I love the premise!!

- love at first sight? check!

- m y s t e r y

- action!!

- conclusion: an okay read

Saving the Villain from the Heroine

Description:

Sielle is an ordinary handmaid working for the Grand Duke Ferzei Yekarte. The thing is... she knows he's a villain of a story she read in her previous life on Earth. With her prescience, she managed to foil an assassination attempt on her master, only to be framed for the crime! Worse yet, when she drank the poisoned wine to prove her innocence, she turns into a little girl... And now the Grand Duke wants to ship her off to a notorious family of assassins? Will she manage to survive through all this, even if she knows how it will all end?

THOUGHTS AND WHY YOU SHOULD READ

- cute cute cute

- plot = 3.5/5

- art = 3/5

- the art is okay but the deadpan expressions ruins the story like it’s so fake

- the ml is prob one of the most extra ml ever lmao

- found fam!!

- an okay and cute read

Answer Me, My Prince

Description:

Cordelia Grey, a 22-year-old novice editor with many aspirations visited an antique shop to receive the manuscript for the sequel to the fairy tale novel, "The Princess and the Knight." But she ends up exchanging letters with Prince Archie, a character from the fairy tale, using a book chest she obtained through a twist of fate. To Cordelia, holding a conversation with a novel protagonist is like something that only happens in fantasies. To Prince Archie, Cordelia's advice is desperately needed, since she knows the future of the his world. The two continue sending letters to each other, not realizing how the summer nights are slipping by...

THOUGHTS AND WHY YOU SHOULD READ

- omg I'm so shookt

- the plot is = 5/5 chefs kiss!

- art = 4/5

- it’s so interesting and I'm pleasantly surprise when I read it!!

- ml is so smooth

- a lot of mystery and magic

- making its way to my fav list!

I Met the Male Lead in Prison

Description:

I met the male lead in prison.

Okay. I get that I transmigrated into an R-19 tragic romantic novel, but why is he like this?

“Arf! Arf! Arf! Grrrrrr…”

I can’t believe this guy is held by a curse that makes him act like a beast… And that’s not the end of it, because he then returns to normal for a moment.

“I-i-if you aren’t g-going to take responsibility for what you did to me, th-th-then don’t t-touch me!”

At any rate, I felt relieved that I probably wouldn’t have any sort of romantic interactions with this guy.

A year later…

“Th-th-the day I leave this place, please…m-meet up with me!”

Well, it wouldn’t be a big deal to meet him once. But then, when I was released from prison…

***

“Welcome back. My lovely younger sister.”

The day of my release, a man approached me. It turns out, I’m the villain’s sister.

“You must have suffered going to prison in my stead. I waited only for you.”

…F*ck. My brother is the male lead’s sworn enemy?

***

3 years later, I met the male lead again. He looked totally different than when I last saw him.

“It’s been a while, Iyana. I’m going to kidnap you now.”

THOUGHTS AND WHY YOU SHOULD READ

- I've been waiting for this since forever!!

- art = 6/5

- plot = 4/5

- ADORKABLE!!

- she’s so cool!!

- the ml is so cute and I just want to pet him!

- 2nd ml (?) is so whipped I cannot lol

- the bro is the most interesting ‘cause I don't know him yet but he hot!!

- conclusion: a new fav!

#I Met the Male Lead in Prison #Answer Me My Prince #reynlist #manhwa #Saving the Villain from the Heroine #Night Crying Crow #Your Majesty Please Spare Me This Time #reyn.manhwarecs #manhwa recommenation

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forgottenlivesobverse · 4 years

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Q&A with Paul Driscoll

Paul Driscoll is a writer, editor and publisher based in Leigh, Greater Manchester. He has been a Doctor Who fan ever since his parents took him to see the stage play The Seven Keys to Doomsday. He is the co-founder of Altrix Books, whose publications include his novel The Chronosmith Chronicles: After Vincent and the Doctor Who essay collection Army of Ghosts. Having written two books for Obverse Books’ Black Archive range, in 2020 he joined the editorial team. Paul’s work has also featured in various charity anthologies including You on Target (Watching Books), Whoblique Strategies (Chinbeard), The Unofficial 1987 Doctor Who Annual (Terraqueous Distributors), and The Curse of Fanfic (Obverse Books).

His story, ‘Doctor Crocus and the Pages of Fear’, stars the George Gallaccio Doctor, and it starts like this:

‘“Jack, it’s about to start, lad!”

‘Barney Forrester smiled as, with typical heavy-footedness and nearly tripping over his dressing gown cord in the process, his thirteen-year-old son Jack came bounding down the stairs to join his parents in the living room.

‘“Honestly,” laughed Barney’s wife, Mabel, who was furiously knitting a winter bedspread under a wobbly side lamp in the corner of the spacious room. “I don’t know why you watch that drivel.”’

FL: What attracted you to this project?

PD: The Brain of Morbius is one of my earliest Doctor Who memories. The six-year-old me wanted to know about the adventures of these other Doctors (it never once occurred to me that they could have been the faces of Morbius) and I even looked in the local library for them. I was fascinated by regeneration, having already seen two Doctors – Pertwee, of course, and Trevor Martin in the stage-play The Seven Keys to Doomsday. The chance to not only read, but to also write about one of them fulfils a 44-year-old ambition. I was so disappointed to learn they were never shown on TV.

FL: Each story in the book features a different incarnation of the Doctor. Tell us about yours.

PD: This Doctor is a showman with theatrical panache and a love of paradox and chaos. He styles himself as a magician and likes to make an impression. He is cheerful and optimistic by default. Scratch beneath the surface, though, and you will be left with the distinct impression that this is a man who has witnessed the most awful things. Wilfully unconventional, he thrives in places where censorship and conservatism are the order of the day. For that’s when he can best work his magic.

FL: These Doctors only exist in a couple of photos. How did you approach the characterisation of your incarnation?

PD: It started with a smile. That cheeky smile in the still of George Gallaccio set me on a path to imagining this incarnation as something of a trickster who likes to entertain only to pull the rug from under his unsuspecting victims’ feet. I decided to give him a pseudonym that he would use in a deliberately ironic way. Crocus was a slang Victorian term for a quack healer, a miracle worker suspected of being a con artist. Early on, before I started writing, I also wanted a catchphrase that reflected the fact that he styled himself as a Victorian gentleman (based on the costume Gallaccio was wearing), hence ‘dash my buttons’. That, and his rather unusual companion, helped to give me a voice for the character. Once I had established those basics, I was ready to put him into action.

FL: What's your story about?

PD: London schoolboy Jack Forrester is a comic book collector who strikes up a friendship with a mysterious new kid in town, Varne. When Jack’s father Barney, the local beat officer, arrests his comics supplier, Varne offers an alternative – pristine Penny Dreadfuls straight from the last century. The Doctor, stranded in the North London suburb, soon becomes embroiled in the censorship war and a frantic search for a missing child. But is history repeating itself?

FL: The stories are intended to represent a 'prehistory' of Doctor Who before 1963. How did that affect your approach?

PD: I wanted to make this the Gallaccio Doctor’s debut adventure, hence I set it around the time in which it might have been broadcast. From the mid-fifties there were a number of prominent campaigns to ban the sale of comics and graphic novels (mostly those imported from the USA). Although barely any prosecutions were made, the Harmful Publications Bill (Children and Young Persons) of 1955 sought to protect young people from any fiction that was believed to glorify violence and encourage criminality. The Doctor would have hated such a move!

I also re-watched a number of classic 1950s-early 60s UK television shows, including Quatermass II and Dixon of Dock Green. The former became a template for a fictional show in my story (you might recognise the words used by the announcer) and the latter is name-checked. Dixon of Dock Green is sometimes unfairly regarded as a poor representation of policing at the time (compared to say Z-Cars), but I’ve played on that tension between myth and reality in my characterisation of the police.

One of the challenges was in trying to show how Doctor Who even then might be ahead of its time, while at the same time making it something that could feasibly have got through the censors. If I was to rewrite it as if first broadcast today, I might, for instance, have reversed the roles of policeman Barney and his stay-at-home long-suffering wife Mabel.

FL: Who would be your ideal casting for a pre-Hartnell Doctor?

PD: George Cole. The kids would have loved him and he’d have played the Doctor as a rule-breaker with no heirs and graces – a true working-class hero – or Lionel Jeffries for a more eccentric take on the character.

FL: What's your next project?

PD: I’m currently on the home stretch of The Holy Hotel, my entry into Christopher Stone’s parody series Professor Howe. I’m writing Howe as Miranda Hart in what is effectively my take on The God Complex. Under the Altrix Books imprint, I’m currently editing a sequel to Master Pieces amongst other projects, and for Obverse I’ve just finished my first book as a Black Archive editor and work in progressing on my third contribution to the range – Vincent and the Doctor.

#paul hanley #forgotten lives #obverse books #fanthology #george gallaccio #the gallaccio doctor #morbius doctors #the brain of morbius #doctor who #dr who #doctorwho #drwho

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adozentothedawn · 4 years

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Winx Club Rewatch Log Part 6 (s. 2, epi. 1-8)

Side note, I’ll refer to Aisha as Layla, because that’s the name I grew up with. Also, I was informed that I’m wrong actually, and Nabu does stay dead. It seems the second movie is just set before season 4, for whatever reason. I’m not sure how I feel about that. It’s ballsy for sure, and I prefer it to the retconning I thought it was, but specifically giving them the power to stop death and then not letting them use it just seems meanspirited. I don’t know, maybe I’m just a wuss, but I think I’d have liked it better if they’d just made season 5 about saving him. Oh well. Then again I’m salty about them bringing back Daphne, so I guess I just can’t decide how I want it. Actually no, I could live with the Daphne thing, if her design wasn’t so atrocious. But that’s generally a late series issue. I still don’t like it. Especially because they did keep her ghost design! Why did they just abandon that! Okay, now I gotta stop and calm down again.

Very fancy opening shot. No, the character animation does not mash with the 3d background, but it's still impressive.

I like that who the elves bond with isn't completely obvious. The only one you immediately know is Digit, but the rest really isn’t that on the nose.

Layla is great. I love her.

I hate that the phoenix has a face under his helmet but even less of a waist than the girls. I don't know what he is, he creeps me out and he isn't really compelling. The only good thing about him is the voice actor, but to be fair the voice acting in the German version at least is really solid. The bird transformation is kind of cool as well.

j/ They really didn't try to hide this door, didn't they?

j/ Why can Kiko fl suddenly? xD

j/ Stella, fuck you, that headband was perfect! Also I love Riven clapping grumpily in the background.

That first lesson with Wizgiz about the whole no light without shadow is the only thing from season two that really stuck with me my whole life. It's a really cool way to demonstrate that principle.

j/ They never did explain how Layla knew four days had passed by looking at her hands.

I like the codex as an idea, but it's just not set up. Worse still is the phoenix. I don't like him. Yes, let's recruit three teenage witches. Yes, let's go with the weird skeleton man. Yes, let's give the teenage witches new outfits exactly like their old ones and also magical jewelry.

j/ Faragonda fell for the 'As you know' trap. Also sorry, lady, but it still doesn't make sense to send the students in. I do like demonstration of who would be a good idea to send.

j/ Are their midriffs allergic against clothes?

j/ I love that Riven didn't even fight Layla over the bike, he just went with it.

j/ 'You're the light of my life, but a torch has saved my life more than once.' Brandon, damn!

Oh no. I just remembered about the stupid subplot with the underground people. I hate them dearly. I hate their giant eyes. And their misoginysticly coloured culture. And the supid plot.

...They murdered the other elves. But yeah, pot made this show dark.

j/ I hate the mouth inside the snake's mouth.

I'm not a fan of the whole swap someone we don't even know yet, but I do like me a guy with wings.

Not really about this episode, but I just noticed I misremembered Bloom's dad's name. Whoops.

j/ Thank you Winx Club, I'm sure that Braveheart reference will be much appreciated by your target audience.

j/ Yes. Grapefruit juice is what he's drinking.

I love that we get dramatic sepia baby pics of Brandon. xD I hate everything else about this subplot, but that was funny.

I'm so mad that took out Palladium for Avalon. I mean I get what they were going for with him, but Palladium is so much cuter.

j/ Oh god, the monolith is from Winx Club!

Excuse me? I have no memory of this whole 'the original witches worked for Darkar' thing. They pulled this out of the nothing and after this season threw it right back, because it's stupid.

Soft boy Helia is a soft boy and I love him.

I love what they did with the Red Fountain school. This show has many issues, but creativity isn't one of them.

#winx club #my log

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apryllfool · 6 years

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So I saved the things I thought of a few days ago because I didn’t want to write them in disjointed bullet points... but here we are

* N.S.: The most interesting idea I considered was one Jazzy and Flame know, but I dunno if they told aku!! So, that one was about N.S. trying to transform himself-- and maybe first, his ‘new mother’-- into a dream person, instead of a nightshift. Probably painful, maybe impossible-- but you did tell him to find ‘another way,’ mother~! (Apparently dream people don’t really need to be sustained like the nightshifts, so y’know. If there’s another way, maybe he could try that too-- but we’ll see!)

* My magical sister girl to Aku’s bo y: (she needs a name r i p... maybe Electra...). But I still have trouble deciding on her personality. I think she’s pretty quiet in nature, but she seems to have fun with the magic and playing games and things! It’s not really a cold, quiet-- but after running away and being separated from her brother, that might change.

* Okay s o, I really already like the dynamic laid out of the Lolcatz and I really didn’t want to disrupt that,, , b u t, I heard the name Zenith or it fell out of the air, and I just think it’s a really cool name that deserves to be a hacker’s, thank you.

* I also like the name Axel, so I’ll see about that.

* Sophie: I wanna re-work her past! It does feel like she was orphaned, but it almost feels like that was for a super short time. And I know she was homeless for at least a day following that. She remembers that kinda vividly, before Jian came to help her. If anyone watched hetalia and know Lichtenstein and Switzerland’s first meeting, it felt kinda like that to her-- ? Y e.

Anyways, I was considering if one of her parents walked out on the other, and maybe she was pushed to live with a grandparent who later died. Feels like someone might’ve been loose with money around her so I dunno,,,,

But she also feels like she could’ve had a science-y dad who accidentally killed someone in her family-- (consider the mother, and maybe her having a burn and scars from it)-- and been jailed for manslaughter, but more on that later.

I alsoooo think she likes enclosed spaces, and if Jian is ever looking for her, she may be curled up in the closet, so there she b e. (I’m curious what his first thought may have been after finding her there.....) I have no idea what I’ll go with but ehhh! Maybe a combination of all of it,,

Also consider Riyu waiting in a closet... waiting for someone to ‘find her’. sm H Maybe she’d hide in Takumi’s closet, consider tha t,,,,, I also wanna rework her backstory but hhh more on that later also--,,

* Reina: I’ve noticed that she thinks alot about the past, and present (the most?), but isn’t too keen on thinking for the future. Some of her actions I think should reflect that-- though I can’t think of too many cases,,, but I think that’s where her temperament lies, at least?? The fact that she may not figure a problem would result from her actions, and those consequences catching up to her later. I think she has trouble owning up to something being her fault, too but I dunno.

And lastly, I don’t think she is one yet-- but I want to shape her into a more resourceful character. I mean nothing’s happened to her yet but-- Also, I’m still thinking about it alot but I want her to be hecked by ‘Suki’ alot, thank you flame for making me look forward to that.

* Shotaro: (y’all know some of these but, here I have listed): 1. Blood Weapons. (I don’t think he’s only getting his blood from Deja and Sorina-- if you know what I mean. Maybe he uses some of his own-- unlikely it’s alot, but I feel like he may go find bodies as well..... maybe some left behind by a few rasetsu.... though it seems gross to him-- it may be one of his only ways to get it, from the dead. Which he would do if he thought it’d get him closer to a. finishing his teachers work, or b. bringing his teacher back to life)

2. We’ve established that he’s not above drugging you guys’ food. (Imagine him standing over one of your beds and muttering an ‘I’m sorry’, but like is h e,,)

3. Newest info: I imagine he would use the fact that Sorina and Deja can’t read Japanese to his advantage. There’s no real need to hide most of that information, then, ya dig? And I feel like some of his pages have Deja and Sorina’s ‘stats’, or information like weight, height, how they react to this or that. I feel like it’s kinda creepy, but eh! I imagine he has some sort of desk in his room, but also in the living room. The one out in the open seems to have a lot of papers on it-- pretty disorganized. But in his room he may have organized notes... those may be his teachers actual notes. All neat and organized in his room-- treated with the respect they deserv e.

4. I considered him looking into the red-eyed rumors if he ever heard about it, or wanted to consider it ma y b e. I don’t know if he would hear about it since it seemed it was passing through schools, and he doesn’t really get around much so fl o p s. But if he found out anything about dead people coming back to life, I think that’s a route he could go down.

5. I think he is kinda focused on bringing people back too-- or one person in particular. But I dunno if that was part of the wizards goals with his experiments-- that can be for an aku to decide. But I know he wants to bring the wizard back, at least.

6. Consider Shotaro being a doctor to Deja whenever he gets sick tho. They can’t afford the medical bills, after all. Sure you don’t trust him, but what other option do you have? He probably will only pull minor tricks then.... and not at first. He’ll try and gain your trust. But-- seriously he would nurse them both back to health though, seriously. He’d read the medicine labels outloud and be like ‘well this s a y s it cures colds, and I hate Nyquil as much as the next guy but he y.’ For Deja, he may need to try some other medicines though-- which he would try and concoct safely. He should know a bit about what your body reacts to, so,,,,

7. He’s learning kinda dark magic-y stuff, but consider that he only teaches the small things to Sorina. When she wants to learn more it’s just like: ‘Sorry, teacher died before I could learn anything else from him, k b y e’

8. Last thing written was that he’s “not sure whether to love or hate his ‘new family’.” ...

9. But there’s also that fact that he’s a patronizing asshole? Well, I don’t know why because he seriously doesn’t judge them for not knowing Japanese that well or being able to read-- or for being ignorant to anything else. Like really, who would? Makes no sense to him for that to happen when they know two languages well enough to be fluent in either. But still... he might look down on them for something. It’s not like he thinks he’s better though, so.. hmnnn. Maybe it’s more of a superiority thing in thinking they need him... when deep down he’s sure they don’t. Or maybe it’s just jealousy. He feels separate from the two, a bit.

But anyway, enought on THAT loser! Moving on...~!:

* There was also me considering something of a military man whose wife and kid(s?) had been taken to be used as leverage during a war-- with only the kid being able to escape. I considered the possibility of either the kid escaping on his own, or staying with his mother and being killed... then maybe he could be a dream boy. Or maybe there were two siblings-- and one stayed while the other went...~

Also Ren’s been feeling really bad but he’s just stupid and won’t let me say why yet, it’s fin e. Has to do with Shio and Kyo tho so it’s probably kinda obvious but also ehhhhh

#But!!#That’s it! Sorry it’s long! Hope it’s easy/quick to read though-#tl;dr

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littleartistthoughts · 5 years

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Romeo x Juliet

Sooo. Sometime during my middle school years, I was on the AMV side of YouTube. I stumbled across an AMV of the anime, Romeo x Juliet, to the background song: “Romeo and Juliet.” Out of curiosity, I searched up the anime, and I found it on YouTube. I think I watched the final scenes of the last episode first, without any context. I guess I was interested enough to start from the beginning.

And I became obsessed. By obsessed, I mean, seriously, seriously, obsessed. I fell in love with everything -- the main characters, the music, the world. The romance was touching, the story was impacting, and it was just perfect. I cried sooo hard. It became one of those things that touched me so much to the point I thought about it for weeks and weeks. I searched up AMV’s and fanart and scoured the Wikipedia page over and over, so eager to have more.

I even tried to burn the entire series on DVD because I wanted to watch it whenever I wanted (so I had to learn how to burn a DVD, though I don’t think I ever actually succeeded). Eventually, though, by some luck, I found the DVD at Best Buy, and my dad bought it for me.

I shared it with my friends. I sent them all home to watch it, and I felt overjoyed when they came back to school the next day saying they binged it and cried and loved it. We became something of a fan club. Lol.

Then time went on and I thought of it less and less, though I was always fond of the memory of watching it. I remembered it as a sad, beautiful anime that I loved so much. Actually, it impacted me so much that I’m borrowing some elements of the story for my own works. To this day, I reference the show when I’m wondering about the design of my own fantasy universes.

These days, I’m slowly molding my Sol Verynda universe. I’ve been doing that for about four years now. I keep changing things or developing them further. Sometimes, I run out of inspiration. I’m still dragging details out of the world where I can find them. Sometimes you just need a giant push.

I don’t remember the reason, but sometime during this past week or the last, Romeo x Juliet popped into my mind. I think I was just reminiscing the story. And then I decided to just watch it. You know. For the heck of it.

So for the first time in a very, very long time, I watched the series.

I’m a lot older now and more mature than I was in middle school, which means there’s a lot more that I can understand now. That means I’m also a lot more cynical now. And critical. And the devil’s always on my shoulder. Plus this raging depression that just won’t go away is in my mind. So I re-watched the anime through a different lens.

Still me, but a different version.

I watched the series over the course of a few days (busy with school and work). I decided to watch it in Dub because that’s the original way I watched it, and I wanted to recapture that feeling I got when I watched before. Even though my sister gave me such a hard time about it. Like, seriously. She came into my room and slapped my phone out of my hands because she was so disgusted. I retaliated.

I like the Dub also because the script is so lovely in English. They incorporate some Shakespearian speak (I learned later that it’s really called iambic pentameter). So the characters sometimes speak like it’s the 14th or something century, and it’s pleasant to hear. I also just really like hearing them speak poetically in an American accent.

Buuuut, I caved out of curiosity. I searched the Subbed version on YouTube and watched a few minutes of the first episode, just to see the difference. And, well. I get it. The show was made specifically for Japanese, and so that version is actually very fitting. Buuut, I still continued on with the dub. I’m thinking now, though, that I’m going to rewatch the show in the Subbed version sometime soon. It’ll be like seeing the story again, but with a different feel. So, yeah.

Anywayyyy, so the story. The show takes liberties with the adaptation. I’ve never read the original play, but we all know how it goes. And I think I watched Romeo + Juliet with Leonardo DiCaprio, so I had an idea. In the original, Romeo belongs to the Montague family and Juliet belongs to the Capulets. Their families hate each other, but they fall in love anyway. After a string of events, Romeo and Juliet die together, and the family conflict is resolved by this tragedy.

In the anime, Romeo’s father, Leontes Montague, murders every member of the Capulet family so he can take over the city, Neo Verona, as ruler. Only Juliet, who was rescued by her family’s loyalists, escapes. She’s two years old. Fourteen years later, Montague is the tyrannical king of the city, and Juliet is forced into hiding. She disguises herself as a boy, named Odin, though she was never told the reason why she had to do so.

Montague is on the hunt to find her. In his tyranny, he allows his guards to torment the citizens. And so Juliet, disguised as a man, takes on the persona of the Red Whirlwind to defend the people.

Eventually, Juliet winds up at the palace, dressed as a girl, for the Rose Ball. And she and Romeo meet. And it’s a love at first sight moment.

Later, Juliet finally learns of her heritage, and her world becomes chaotic.

One thing I didn’t realize when I was younger was just how much of a sweetheart Romeo is. He lived a rough life in the palace. His father was emotionally and physically abusive. His mother left him to join a convent (though she deeply regretted leaving him). He was alone at the palace except for his best friend, Benvolio, and his Dragon Steed (basically, flying pegasus), Cielo. Despite that, he had a big heart. He was nothing like his father. He genuinely was a good person.

And Juliet just deserved so much better. The girl could never catch a break. She and Romeo had similar temperaments. She was really sweet and considerate with a good, forgiving heart. But she was also this badass swordsman secret vigilante who was a fearless leader and fought for justice. We see her character develop over the course of the series. She slowly matures after all her mistakes. And in the end she’s the one to save the world.

The love shared between these two is really the driving force of the story. It’s the reason the two fought so hard to create a world of love instead of hatred. Instead of revenge, Juliet’s focus was on freedom and happiness. Without Romeo, she might have actually killed Montague and gone with the route of hatred.

The series did get a little cheesy and naive sometimes, I felt while watching. That’s the cynical adult in me. However, the show doesn’t hesitate to admit that. For example, when Romeo’s trying to motivate a group of exiles to cultivate a dead land, his words do seem childish and idealistic. And several inmates point that out. But they do eventually try.

I don’t know. To me, it’s a reminder that the idealism of children is so powerful. Adults don’t have that same spirit. A lot of us are always worried about the bad outcomes of things. We’re always tired. We’re so used to seeing bad things that we become cynical. But kids aren’t so used to it yet, so they still have these grand hopes.

It can be a disadvantage, of course, such as when Juliet jumped into an opportunity out of her naivety, just to see her loyalists fall.

But, still. We get characters like William (a caricature of Shakespeare himself), who is so childish and idealistic and perpetually inspired.

When I was in middle school, I hadn’t yet experienced a real relationship. So it was fun to imagine what it would be like. Watching Romeo and Juliet’s relationship blossom gave me such a warm, fluttery feeling. You know. I wanted a romance like that.

Re-watching it, post-heartbreak from my FL and other “romantic” endeavors, I view love a lot differently now. Honestly, I haven’t felt fondly about it for a long time. I’ve come to a point where I almost detest it. I detest boys and the hurt they can cause me. It’s hard to imagine myself in a good, loving, idealistic relationship again after all the guys I’ve encountered.

Well. My heart is still too broken for a new love, but I still felt my heartstrings pulled by the anime. Maybe it’s too soon to tell, but I think my opinion has shifted a bit. I forgot, really, how amazing romantic love can be. How consuming. Even when I’m not a part of it, just seeing it unfold is so precious. It makes me feel all warm and happy inside. And inspired to write.

Anyway.

One other thing that I’m really noticing now that I just didn’t before is the symbolism. That scene where Romeo asked Juliet (without knowing she was present) what flower she would prefer for a garden, she answered with a “rose.” I remember feeling confused. The entire series, the white iris was the symbol of their relationship. But why would she answer a rose?

Well. The iris is on the Capulet family crest, and the rose is on the Montague family crest. Juliet was saying she wanted him.

Also, Leontes Montague entered the family by becoming a ward, and then poisoning his way to the top. Also, his father is a Capulet, meaning Romeo and Juliet are distant cousins. Oof.

Also, I know more about art and architecture now thanks to Art History courses. So seeing all the reliefs and structures in the series was astounding. Seriously. Astounding. There’s this constant image of a goddess with angel’s wings in prayer. It appears in statues, reliefs, statuettes, paintings, etc. There was a goddess statue at the fountain where Romeo and Juliet first met.

In the end, we learned this goddess is a symbol of Escalus, the grand tree that serves as a life force to the continent.

If anything, I really really really wish there was a prequel or something that went into the history of the Capulet family and the tree of Escalus. There were so many unanswered questions. Like, why was Neo Verona floating over the sky the whole time? How? Why did Escalus keep it afloat? Why did the Capulet family have to be the one to make sacrifices? Why the girls? Who was Ophelia, really? What’s the history? When they fell from the sky, did they just rejoin the larger world? They mention Christian and Greek mythos, so how do they know about it? They say Escalus is the patron goddess of Neo Verona, so are there others?

Sadly, we might never find out. But it’s all still very interesting.

Neo Verona is a living, breathing world. It’s a fantasy world that we fall in love with.

All the side characters make us care for saving the world, and Juliet mentions this, too. She decides her sacrifice would be worth it if it meant her loved ones would get to live. And we agree, too, because we come to love all the minor characters. Every single one. Even though we don’t want her to die.

Watching it this time around, I also started to understand Montague, and admire him as a villain. He’s layered. He’s vicious. He’s ruthless. He’s a little insane. He was never loved (he says this in his final moments). His mother died when he was young. He told Romeo he deeply cared for him, which I kind of believe. In a twisted way, I believe he did love him. I believe he also loved Romeo’s mother, Portia. When he visited her, he started by saying she could have lived in luxury with him if she didn’t leave.

Montague also seemed to genuinely care for Escalus. For some reason. Maybe he didn’t want to the world to end with him in it. He seemed to be searching for a genuine solution to the problem.

Anytime Montague was on screen, he was riveting. Truly terrifying. Charming with some, like Hermoine and other lady nobility. But murderous. And a swordsman. Underneath it all, all his heinous acts, he just wanted love. In the end, he died in Juliet’s arms.

The mythos of the world was incredible as well. I’m a sucker for fantasy, and the show really runs with all my favorite things. Prophecy. Ancient things. Sacrifice. Enhanced nature.

I haven’t watched anime in a long time. Honestly, I sort of shunned it from my mind when “Asian things” became more and more shameful. Well, that thinking is shameful. Because anime is truly beautiful. It captures humans in a different way. Anime knows how to do romance. It knows how to build tension and longing, it knows how to invest the audience. Every anime I ever watched has hooked me to the romance (something American TV can’t ever do with me).

I just love the tone of anime. The wittiness, the playful scenes, the heavy moods, the characters and their attitudes. It’s all entirely distinct. I don’t know why, but it really gets you wanting. Plus the expressiveness of 2D animation that can do absolute wonders.

I’m a really big fan of Game of Thrones, don’t get me wrong, and maybe the show just butchered the story, but for a while I just wanted to make a story similar in spirit to Thrones. You know. The realism. The darkness. The unfairness.

But I forgot that you can make your own worlds with fiction. And your own rules. Life is life. It’ll always be unfair and tragically beautiful, and there are lovely stories to capture that. But then there are those stories that are an abstraction of reality, like Romeo x Juliet. Not totally realistic, but spellbinding. You’re thrown into this world, and you just want to be a part of it. For a while, you can escape the real world and join this one.

It gets one inspired about living in a different world.

So while realism is great, fiction and world-building are just so much more fun. And impactful. And creative. And magical. And fan-service isn’t a bad thing.

I cried during the final episode, once right after Romeo died, and again during the Epilogue. Everyone who lived got a happy ending, and I was so sad and happy seeing them all enjoying life. After all the darkness that they went through, they all ended up living in the bright, joyous world that Romeo and Juliet dreamed of.

That’s fucking inspiring. To the max. A little cheesy, but in a way that feels so earned and so right.

So anyway, I’m glad I decided to rewatch it. I was in my early teens when I last watched it, and now I’m 21. Oh, and the decade is ending. Seems fitting. Maybe it’ll help me set the tone for the next decade, which I hope will be one of creativity. And maybe some romance. Maybe. Maybe it’ll have that attitude.

It’s still one of my favorite stories of all time, and I’m definitely going to rewatch it again in the future. Next time will probably be soon. I have to spend some time recovering from the emotional roller coaster that I went through. Maybe next month. I’ll watch it in Sub, the way it was meant to be, I guess. And I’ll see the difference. And I’ll probably write another post about how I felt about it.

Until the next time.

#121119

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airoasis · 5 years

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"Hell" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 1 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/hell-father-ted-series-2-episode-1-dead-parrot-8/

"Hell" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 1 | Dead Parrot

Younger Tom that is the primary time you can be entrusted with one of these enormous consignment or all three are typically over yet? Do not concerned about me is on an investor Tom that is the button that opens the doorways and that is the button that makes the so we shoot out this one for the doorways and this may increasingly shove the top and the other way around Rheya July the nineteenth. We that strike me main. Sure Tonight 19. I wouldn’t be aware of Ted you colossal trouble i am sorry. I mentioned i wouldn’t recognize ted you giant baller have you been reading those roddy Doyle box once more do I? Have but had a colossal ? So that’s all good, however you ought to take into account. They’re simply reviews typical people like us. Do not use that kind of language do not forget that is the real world. Oh, you are proper there ted Anyway, any proposal why july the nineteenth should be so fundamental would be the day of the ice age ended? No, it can not be that certain in regards to the ice age appeared it up on the diary July 19th on at the moment at Galway liberated from Indians Marathon turns into snickers Ha said, I say Jen Time for tea father Mrs..Doran whatever strike you is fundamental about july the 19th. It doesn’t matter. What day is his father there may be continuously time for a high-quality cup of tea mustn’t i know him sent from the go pause for a satisfactory cup of tea before giving him for the ? No, he didn’t Mrs.. Doyle some thing gear. That they had forty keep her without end speaking of cake. I’ve cake i am high-quality for cake with the toys is your father there is cocaine in it oh you’re not cocaine what am I a debauch? No? I named which referred to as them cause right won’t thank you don’t be small. It can be just a tiny little thing you is not going to even believe it getting into you is not going to even recognize your nation will recognize i am utilizing it mrs..Doyle appear at you. Will not you seem at this reisman? It is rarely even a cake it is an micro cake this is going. I rather will not have any position. Come on now. It can be got Raisins Cherry Cinnamon cinnamon oil, really I do recognize cinnamon. Ok, . Going what the heck? I’ll have one three no i am forcing it no, no you are no longer Why no longer cinnamon no? No, you are just being polite if you don’t want any all you ought to do is say, no just that one little word no it’s a beautiful phrase our lord gave to make use of here on this planet, but we don’t want any cake. Yes Justice i might clearly love some cake Mrs..Doyle when you can’t have any I? Was once cake no no i am just going out to have these destroyed Anyway, this spacing is bothering me now, july the nineteenth. That is anything. We constantly do on july the 19th this is some thing to do with Jack maybe oh, God. It can be now not is oh no? Wait, this turns unsightly recall just earlier than Christmas. Oh, thank God for that. Oh, God almighty You ok, I believe um So what could it’s? Vacation the place are we going how head God I don’t know pearson Pearson’s no, Mr.. Pearson doesn’t rather like men and women staying with him under vacations. It’s not without a doubt a visitor residence mouth no take into account the colossal arguments. We control them final year when we tried to remain at 2d studying good day, you recognize we might father o’rourke has that Caravan and he said we might users and he said we wish to oh no mentioned No, now not once more.It is very small that Caravan no he’s got a brand new one. Thank . It’s twice It used to be the one at the end there is seem big We’re right here father. Thank God. Consider the great Caravan in the whole world – girl where’s the trailer with all the stuff us? Next factor you can be telling me you didn’t lock the front door Ted come on right in minute father. I promise you that is very constrained. Good, you realize that is what it’s all about go to again. I’m wrinkling up your raisin in there the backing of sake underneath Ted Crilley Island Parochial condominium Craggy Island accident Cra Ggy island on she officer I can not make an apology sufficient God for ok. It can be now not one other one. Which one is So this is excellent. You are aware of it is better than a third one What we do first , I? Will take it convenient for a even as. I suppose we should simply get settled into the historic proper that is adequate of that where we go? Oh, this is the booklet eight? Oh? Locations of interest send Kevin Stomp hMM.Sounds excellent the Magic street, two places of interest what is the Magic road Ted? Some of these bizarre traditional wonders for everything’s gone haywire, and nothing works the way. It’s presupposed to it’s such as you Google besides at the street I still do not understand. It is a variety of a mannequin. Sure it is what’s known as a unusual phenomenon should you discontinue to coroner’s and took off the hand rig it could roll uphill and Water would glide place of job close to as mad as that thing you informed me concerning the lows in the that’s when our lord bought only one or two bits of food And was a whole pile of meals and every person has it for dinner. God. He was once top notch wasn’t I? He is awesome Father jack do you might have any preferences excursion? Sure? We’re on holiday would you adore to head wherever what? Would you adore to head somewhere? How are you ? Was simply asking would you adore to go someplace now that we’re here would you adore to head free beautiful walk? I admire cake sure, yeah discontinue talking to father Jack. Where are you? What’s that in there? Are mighty? God, let’s just get him to sleep and we head off ourselves, father into your box Let’s go seem for the Magic the vacation begins here doogal Come on.Let’s play Did you convey the travel Scrabble Duel I? Brought the natural Scrabble and the travel Scrabble ted the travel Scrabble for after we have been visiting and the usual Scrabble for after we arrived just right man. Comprehend wait a minute now that I feel of it. I failed to carry both them right automobile the Monopoly in order that uh what we do for the subsequent two weeks. We’ll put on the kettle yeah, go on need to be one of the ones that clicks off mechanically. Sure It seemed there incidentally did you convey any teabags no? Rice , head yeah when I put extra water in and turn it on again No, i am I preferred it nice the first time perhaps we would turn it on without striking any water in in any respect See what occurred? Don’t consider you will have to do this one of these is We just blow up and you’d be choosing lumps of metal out of your face for the 12 months and a half You get colossal pink blotches and the coffee fish lips greater than the leisure of your face like large precisely like father massive lee.Perhaps that’s what happened to him ninety six 97 99 a hundred coming competent or not one could sing five okay, one final time These are small, but the ones out there are some distance away some distance away, I overlook know the way your eyes frequently play a methods in it ? Recognize Father Larry Doff Larry yeah, he many times comes round to terry when he will get a destroy. He is tremendous enjoyable give him a call on his mobile cell. Received a month for Christmas. He is perpetually complaining that no person ring the monitor What time it switched off? Why is it calling Kevin discontinue? Does not say So this may all vacations are like head virtually yeah Anyway, we better get back to Jack I find. He stated it’s a foot by using the cliffs hi there can we go over to the rocking again head? Well Come on. Ted. We’re on vacations pay attention. All right. We higher get back to Jackson , proper? Good right here, we’re good, we go over to final time no ted. No, we could simply blow off the thrill if we did that now store something for next week father Eggy Island with out sea or She know I left listen you understand the whole business of reporting lacking men and women.We have heard of it. Sure good fee any money to file a lacking character no? Trish let you know . We appear to have lost one among our get together father Jack hackers. . How would you describe them? Mid-50s to mid eighties. She would simply spend a vegetable is as a rule for some motive very irritated man hates children likes the ah drink and if you in finding him don’t come up on them from at the back of you won’t like at all thing do you elevate those electrical Stunner gadgets, oh Boy, oh, no reason that’s right some thing else. I will do for you at the same time i am right here need to confess 80 unsolved murders or some thing ? We’re fine for you all unsolved murders Some vacation, that is growing to be come on. Please no Jack’s long past to be more space to Caravan oh Why? I have no idea like what a just right identify you doing right here good absolutely this is our caravan my father wrote that we could use us. Sure see I feel it was once there to each person today you can room for 2 more lisette appear adolescence crew Morton bast it down there.I mean I no stop fucking with the music desired to Noah Yeah, are you’re going to you alw voice very like Celine dion? We’re dancin come on Solomon Fl them genuinely you already know i am relatively tired What probably you’re right genuinely we’re calling it exhaustively all pondering? A few of us overdid it on regional that’s first-class Jerry knows who i’m speakme about Yeah you understand you’re proper back at us. What’s been 1/2 10? Johnny knows i am speakme available in the market. Don’t you don’t you yes i will see you are the just one to Kneeling Tommy lee. Can you already know all sweetness and light-weight? We need to like that wrap tightly O Southern for lunch you’re a best fella. What else would you say? I’m . What are you do they go together? We know that i do know you i’m wager. What ? How are you? The ancient city town oh, God does he have any worn out? There are mad drought? – yes, .We should all go to mattress. We’re so practically chopped Oh, but more commonly to get some heroin . I am just going to rest room father all correct anybody else must go hate google. Are you ok? We’re grams. Thanks. Nostril. Are you sure now ted you don’t want two distinct excellent matters i go once more the worst factor would be to keep it in considering the fact that you are better Google minkus yes, a buddy of mine father sweeney. He had an awfully small Gathering boat apart from, however Terry’s chocolate orange. No I really? I’m exceptional okay you adore a bunch of camels seem on the dozing bag condominium will it don’t be this comes no longer just a tune the extra the merrier on the grounds that Columns are a excellent soccer team in the mid 50’s take into account did they gained the father fitzgibbon law enforcement officials? Father would provide one other quit. He appeared like a cop loopy right here like control Delirium jed did did you see take into account yeah? I bear in mind him no Hmm.Who’s omit Anna Moaning Michael tonight? God almighty. It is close to o’clock in morning. I feel what we will have to all do now’s get up you go studies i am going mad let’s get overdoing it. Let’s go home Who’s that now? Is that is heading off to the Disco don’t handiest us. We’re simply heading out for some contemporary air recall to carry his back from right consume anything chances are long past back to Craggy Island is robust homing intuition Opens the prize wheeled in the entrance door to seek out him there with a significant smiley face his palms outstretched to welcome us again what? Well probably that is a smiley face Are the outstretched fingers or the welcome back? He’s customarily there? Oh God do get him out fast adorbs right here Open please open there all right there ted. A reasonable bit away. Yes, what you had been rushing up their mattress Sorry about that bloody pervert he is most likely very bloodless now that his home is going away each i will be able to feel about that for ages just i am certain he is gonna begin doing out to it appear at Amber did not see him.Do not you suppose it? , we higher let all of them get alongside Get out of the vehicle hiya again right I think he is down slightly. I know No sufficient no come on Davis proving talents that such nonsense the tires head i will tell you impressing no one with that type of thing? I’ll tear them so tired. Might be we must go back no no no. I’m not going anywhere close an old for long again knows what the youngsters must practice now that is giant. Talk. Thanks. Give us a elevate. Oh, God hello, Fellas. Oh. God um we want a lift. They are not fatter after I’m down and opened at all Sorry that fight Your valuable father your week, thank God play on boy you might have something drink 97 98 99 a hundred coming now competent or no you you .

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batterymonster2021 · 5 years

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"Hell" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 1 | Dead Parrot

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/hell-father-ted-series-2-episode-1-dead-parrot-8/

"Hell" | Father Ted | Series 2 Episode 1 | Dead Parrot

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innisffree-blog · 8 years

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2016

beginning: 2016 is shiny and new tommy and special k and liam--we drink tea and cuddle sem2 begins, ugh I dislike physics i dislike class idislike work (sorting leaves, grinding dirt) BUT there is late night penguin sliding in the arb, loitering about town, Sammy slamma jamma I grow closer to the mounge people we are so annoying and terrible as a group (sd io kds sm nm sp sb pl. nb. ss jp ck. ns sd sk sh ab. etc etc) but I like being a part of this and being emancipated from the cove, an increasingly toxic place Lovely lovely people but I think glory hates me and this is an internal barrier i hate physics i dislike class i hate work (I’m not getting paid for this shit wtf) but i keep going bc “It’s all about the experience.” -Sujay Sarah + wilbur, I do not like wilbur for many reasons. i start to feel weird about sarah, my sister figure. she didn’t even tell me. glory definitely hates me, no one wants to own up to it barrier grows: • the fucking tshirts • the special fucking breakfast club • the fucking group message barrier grows, I shrink. trying to claw my way out. took a risk, made a mistake (to be cont.)  soc anx creeps back in at increasing pace I am failing physics. v day song with Nathan is a seemingly insignificant bright point dark point=all the hours I spent sorting dirt in the lab and the horror and embarrassment that is being a lowly freshman in research time goes on soccer I want to be friends with grace and Hannah etc!! Talk with grace and jon before we all move out and they were like duh we felt the same about you and this makes me disappointed and pleased at the same time, there is hope for next year w these cool people (I’ve regressed to having friend crushes) passed physics, passed everything, survived the anxiety attacks, goodbye for now umich, lessons learned jeez sem2=done, year1=done bordines! I like it there, watering flowers and rescuing snails for money. FL Cameron hates me fr now. Still don’t know why. Picnic w Mack to get back in the groove of clarkston life, she has changed a bit ROCK CAMP ROCK CAMP ROCK CAMP  (june 10 - july 10) I meet ~22 strangers in an Ann Arbor ally and we depart for Wyoming. After 3 days of driving, we arrive as a family. I love it already, minus the altitudesickness. we laugh a lot and have a good time in the mountains. i like these people a lot but especially Brady and jack b and ***MERYN WHIMSY CAMPBELL*** she is a jewel, she is a ray of sunshine, she is a princess in overalls. why did I try to reject her at first? she is so generous with her love that I couldn’t keep her out. I learned the biggest lesson of 2016 from her and she doesn’t even know it. climb a giant loaf of bread in the middle of the night to see the moonrise, barefoot & blind & by myself, a “risky bitch” -Loafie Sutz I see my shadow miles away in the sunrise on that spire thing 3 weeks in: kinda blow up and leave, walk into the wilderness by myself (bad) and swim to an island where I climb a big boulder and make new friends. I calm down. The Grand Nips are the most beautiful place I have ever spent a month, but I never want to see another minivan in my life. I (Pepino) feel at home outside. Caterpillar fights, bfast burritos, stars. Don’t want to leave. back to Michigan to rot. Try to go to mopop with Alaina but sell my ticket to sean during unnecessary study visit to A2 for the class I eventually drop out of. Sushi with sarah (sarah - Wilbur = i’m so happy abt this event that breaks her heart, I am a selfish friend) Calc ii eats me alive, I give up. More rotting. pentwater w fam, Meryn shows up. golf ball incident: I let myself blow up at dad, but Lauren is there and Alan is there and I come back feeling stronger. more rotting in clarkston. sem3! year2! I’m a mentor! so good to see everyone, I begin to appreciate Nicco a lot, become good friends with kastriot (another jewel) and others (matt and jon, etc), trash candy in nicco’s room and HOLY SHIT I love Alex so much, she is another sister figure. It's foreign to have friends who are girls. so excited abt life in mrc, living with Sarah is good and bad. happy. CONFIRMED(co Nicco): glory hates me EXPLANATION: im too friendly(?????) stumble upon ivy and shouri and keilah and I learn more abt this, they hate glory now, I fucking won the battle w my patience and kindness lolol (I hope she's moved on, I feel neutral about her)(drama is foreign to me) get rejected from EH Things are good, hanging out w old crew and rock camp ppl and the boy who i Like and needs to stop acting as though he Likes me too, v misleading sean’s bday @ the trap house / wolf shirts Housing 2017 is a mess, I am a mess :’| this issue is the tip o' the yikesburg FALL BREAK oct 15 -going up to backpack at pictured rocks with camp ppl, but I realized that I don’t rlly fit w them and also they are s l o w so I split and hike alone for 13 miles in one day, oct 16 ****this is the best day of my life**** screaming and yelling out to Lake Superior in pure joy almost falling off the cliff, seeing aaron on the trail, passing the starburst men, getting lost in a soggy forest after dark (kept my cool), getting picked up by Alan: muddy, bleeding, sweaty, thirsty, wielding a knife (Pepino the Risky Bitch™ is back) high on the sublime beauty of oct 16, 2016 oct 17 - study day, drive around Marquette with my boy tommy, climb around on an abandoned aqueduct, talk about life/love. I am so grateful for this brother of mine. oct 18- south! Pasties are gross oct 19 - bad stats test (50%) (how am I this dumb?) (everything is bad again) (this is the beginning of the descent) I stop going to class bc I can’t get out of bed. I haven’t seen my friends in forever. I don’t have friends anymore. I am trapped in my room/head. I want to die. Dropping orgo Failing stats Dropping/failing friends I want this to end. I want to jump out the window of 479 jo and fall like that raven off the cliffs. I want to pull a Chris McCandless, but I don’t have a car. Alex makes everything better by not telling me that everything is going to get better. she’s been there, she’s failed. I love having her around. Bond with tim and eduardo (woops) and alec and jiten at Chris’s house, but sober erin remembers the barriers I’ve lived on this earth for two whole decades!!(Failed a test on the same day) sad bday churros w Lauren, spent the night on the floor at her place. Meryn brought me oranges and a book about glaciers <33 seds is taking up too much of my time but it’s kinda nice. stubborn boy named haydar tries to bring me pad thai and I say no but we become pen pals anyway, now he knows too much. a good character in my life. Nicco takes an absolute SHIT on me - with one statement he discredits all the friendships I thought I had at umich. It isnt a big deal to him, it’s in the past, but it isn’t for me. barrier is complete. The ghost of glory lives on. Same day- Lauren storms out (why doesn’t she want equality??? I thought she had changed) and Kastriot picks up the pieces Time goes on, erin fails stats sem3=done, but a waste of time/resources. I hate myself. Clarkston grandma is drunk and sad Alan is there with Lauren I am kind of there pickling eggs w Mack– I still love her but man oh man she has changed Royal w tommy and nick new years at konrad’s abandoned ghost house, liam dangles me over possibly the last of the giant ass bonfires, graffiti in the barn loft. learned some stuff about konrad, but he is truly a starfish among urchins. Faith in friendship is restored by him and others and myself. I think I’ll stop hating myself now. 2017 will be shiny and new end

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yeskraim · 5 years

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Beach widows: War, death and the battles of those left behind

I remember when the headstone finally arrived. I could see it from the street as I pulled into the cemetery, a grey rectangle above a patch of red clay.

My chest tightened as I walked up to his grave, the tiny American flags I had placed around it months before waving in the wind.

I sat next to the grave and watched ants march into a hole I imagined led straight to my husband. It made me think of disappearing, of his lifeless body, of the time that had passed since I buried him, and of the effect time has on bodies. I winced.

I began reading the words etched in granite, the same ones I struggled to write on the headstone paperwork months before. His first name, his middle name, his last, a sigh of relief. And then, my relief turned to disappointment. “Persian Gulf”, it read instead of “Operation Iraqi Freedom”. His Purple Heart had not been mentioned, either. I was devastated.

Neglect, I believe, is what killed my husband, and he was continuing to be neglected even after his death.

The bomb and the pain meds

My husband was born to a hardworking family, a pull your bootstraps up family, a God-fearing family.

His mama worked at Dollar General for as long as he could remember and loved him, her firstborn, more than anything in the world. His daddy was a truck driver and gone a lot to make ends meet. A quiet and kind man, he liked to remind us all how proud he was of his oldest son.

It is true that my husband, one of four children, was proud to join the Marine Corps after high school. It gave him purpose – great pride, even – to serve his country. But it is also true that, born poor, he was not given many options in life. The military had insurance, scholarships, decent pay, a steady home – things he was not used to having. The Marine Corps made sense for him.

Three years before he would sign his life away, the United States went to war with Afghanistan. And a year after that, he would go to war in Iraq. A bomb took his leg on his second deployment. The pain meds took his life. He was 25 years old when his body was found.

The headstone

I am unsure why I ever felt attached to that headstone. I remember the nerve it took to fill out the proper paperwork to get the headstone in the first place. I was 24, and the first question on the form read: “NAME OF DECEASED TO BE INSCRIBED ON HEADSTONE OR MARKER.”

I imagined my husband’s name, 22 symbols that formed three words meant to represent him. I imagined his face when I first met him, a 13-year-old boy born and raised in the same small town his daddy was, a gap-toothed smile, a Southpark t-shirt with one of the cartoon’s main characters, Cartman, on the front and the words “I’m Not Fat, I’m Big Boned!”

I wrote his name on the line, and it was official. He was dead. I was a widow.

Maybe I had been attached to the headstone before it even arrived. It took months if I remember correctly, and it felt like torture.

Day after day I visited only to find a blank grave. It looked so unloved. I hated myself for not filling out the paperwork sooner.

He had been buried for months before I had gathered enough nerve to even print it out. Then I had to read the questions. Then answer them. Then find a fax machine. Fax it. I could hardly feed myself after planning his funeral and burying him. It was all too much.

So when the paperwork was finally sent, it felt like a major accomplishment, something I could be proud of. I returned home, drew a bath, cried in it until the water went cold.

Maybe it is that his name was so permanently scrawled into stone, and that means something somehow. Doesn’t it? His name, a cluster of words that hardly exist in the world any more, exist so permanently on this otherwise meaningless artefact and somehow, somehow, somehow it brings him into existence again, too. Maybe? I know its weight like I know his hands on my cheeks before he would kiss me. I know the coolness of its stone-like I knew the warmth of his skin. The bright grey, the hard edges, his prominent nose, his deep, brown eyes. They are connected somehow.

[Illustration by Jawahir Al-Naimi/Al Jazeera]

The widows

I had to fill out the same damned paperwork I dreaded doing the first time. Print. Read. Answer. Fax. Wait. It was even more excruciating the second time, my sadness and dread now met with rage. Again, it took months for the new headstone to arrive.

I visited him as often as I could, each time hoping to find a new stone with the correct war on it. But then, when it finally arrived, there was no moment of relief, because the new error was immediately obvious: It had been placed at the foot of his grave, the original one still at the head. Now, he looked unloved, I thought.

I thought about the senseless war that led us here, about every doctor that ignored me when I said I thought he might be addicted to the pain medications they had prescribed him, about finally being told about his death almost 24 hours after they found his body.

Distressed or enraged or somewhere in between, I called the only two people I was certain would get it, Tara and Kristin, whose names I have changed for privacy.

I had met them on a retreat for military widows only months after my husband died. I had just turned 25, and they were both years younger.

We all went to New Orleans with a nonprofit called The American Widow Project. It was a “give back retreat” where we helped rebuild a house that had been ravaged by Hurricane Katrina. We put up drywall, we painted, we sanded and scraped, whatever we could with the limited carpentry knowledge we had.

We were very young women who had experienced great loss in a city that had experienced so much more of it. In New Orleans, I learned that helping others and finding a community are powerful when navigating immense sadness. We were there to rebuild a home for a stranger but, in the process, we also built bonds that would help us survive our own grief.

Though the widows in the group were from all over the country, Tara, Kristin, and I lived within an hour of each other so we not only stayed in contact but became very close. We gave ourselves a name – the beach widows – for our proximity to the Gulf Coast.

My husband’s honour

I felt nobody understood me like they did and nobody ever would. We shared something sacred: An understanding of the world that most would not learn until they were aged or, at least, until their brains were fully developed. We had buried our beloveds. We had had to say final goodbyes to our most important people then learn to navigate the majority of our lives without them.

“I need your help,” I told the beach widows. When I explained the problem with the dual headstones, they met my sadness and rage with their own and I suddenly felt powerful.

We would be like Valkyrie in the night sent by Odin to protect warriors and guide the worthy slain to Valhalla. If nobody else would protect my husband’s honour, if nobody else would fight for his peaceful rest, we would. “When are we gonna do this?” they said.

I arrived at the cemetery early. I wanted to spend some time alone with my husband. We took shots: One for me, then one poured over his grave.

An older woman walked by and nodded with a stiff smile. I watched her and wondered if she was there to see her husband, too, but instead of stopping at a grave, she just walked slowly along each row of them, reading about the people buried there. By the time the beach widows arrived, the woman was gone. Tara swung open her car door. “I have wine,” she said and I popped open my boot.

Trust and control

We sat around his grave, sipping Cabernet from red Solo cups, waiting for night to fall. We watched the sun set behind the pines, watched the pines transform from their familiar three-dimensional forms into smooth, black silhouettes, into ghosts. When only a glow was left on the horizon and we were certain it was dark enough that people driving by could not see us from the road, we got on all fours and felt around the gritty dirt for the bottom edges of the headstone. It was deeper than it looked and the dry clay proved difficult to penetrate with bare fingers.

“I should’ve brought a shovel,” I said, certain we had been defeated.

Tara, without flinching, pulled a wine bottle opener out of her back pocket as if she had done this before, as if this was exactly why she had brought it.

“Screw this,” she said, plunging the metal into the clay, removing one tiny shovel-full at a time – pieces of chestnut hair sticking to the sweat of her forehead – until we were able to fit our fingers underneath.

“On three,” I said. The widows nodded, then: “One, two, lift!”

It took all three of us to carry the headstone to my car. As usual, it was a mess, especially my boot, so I had had to push aside shoes and bills and purses and beach gear to make room. We stared at the headstone, our hands on our hips, Kid Cudi’s Day ‘N Nite playing so loud my car vibrated to the beat.

Seeing the block of stone with my husband’s name on it inside the boot of my car surrounded by so many of my ridiculous things felt wrong as if we had thrown his body back there. But it also felt powerful. For the first time after my husband’s death, I felt like I had gained some control over my grief.

Not only that, but I had trusted these women and they did not disappoint. I had been let down so many times that I was not sure I could trust anyone. I had felt alone for so long. I realised that night that I had just needed to find the right people. With the beach widows, I was not alone.

Widow humour

I carried the headstone with me for six years. I could not imagine it alone in a rubbish bin, alone in the woods, alone as I imagined him in that hole in the ground.

Instead, it stayed in my home, usually on the back porch next to a couple of plastic chairs the last owner of the place had left behind.

I made sure to keep it somewhere visible. I liked the weirdness of it. It made me feel safe, like admitting a flaw before someone calls you out on it.

When the beach widows came over, we would take turns making jokes about what I could do with it.

“I think it would make a great coffee table,” Kristin offered once. “I mean, what a conversation starter.”

“I say put it at your front door. F**k welcome mats. It’ll scare away the people you don’t like anyway,” Tara said. “It’s perfect.”

We all laughed. We called this “widow humour” and we mostly kept it to ourselves, only using it on others when we wanted them to feel uncomfortable or leave us alone.

It is true, too, that the headstone made me feel more normal. For so long, grief ran my life. I could hardly drive without having to pull over so the tears could dry up.

Everything reminded me of my husband, and sometimes the sadness was so vast I felt lost in it, like floating in infinite space, flailing for something solid to hold onto only there was nothing.

Everyone continued living their lives after his death, the Earth continued to orbit the sun, and I was stuck in a world of suffering and sadness.

Seeing that headstone weighted to the ground like an anchor, reminded me that my suffering was real. My husband did die. I did have a reason to be sad. It made me feel grounded, so I held onto it.

[Illustration by Jawahir Al-Naimi/Al Jazeera]

A bond of terrible circumstance

And then, six years after my husband’s death, I lost it when I moved across the country. At first, I did not notice. For years, I somehow forgot I ever had the thing. When I finally did remember it, I was devastated but not because it was gone. I was ashamed that I had become so detached from it that I had lost it.

What I realised was, in some ways, the headstone was entangled with my grief. As my grief disappeared so, too, did the headstone. I was shocked that I had hardly noticed that either had left.

I wondered if I was a bad widow to be happy, to be free of the weight I had been carrying for so long.

Everyone talks about how to deal with grief, but nobody talks about how to feel once it is gone.

My friendship with the beach widows faded, too. The life we shared together as young widows splintered into three new ones, all heading in different directions as relationships often do at that age. In that way, I suppose, we were very normal.

Tara found love again, had two beautiful children, and moved across the country to a large piece of land in the middle of the mountains far from where we first met. Kristin graduated with a biology degree but not before meeting her future husband in the university library. She stayed close to the beach we named ourselves after and gave birth to a chubby-cheeked daughter. I moved to my dream state of Oregon with a man I love dearly. I got my MFA in non-fiction and am pursuing my dream of being a writer and farmer. We are all thriving on our own.

Maybe we will find each other again in our new lives. Or, maybe we found each other exactly when we were supposed to and those few years together are all we will ever have.

Though it makes me sad to admit we are not as connected as we once were, I am also thankful. What this means is we made it. We survived the grief that bonded us, and we no longer carry the kind of weight it takes three people to hold. The hard truth is, we do not need each other any more.

Still, when I go back to visit my husband’s grave, I am grateful for the beach widows and our bond of terrible circumstance, those years of clinging to each other for hope, that night at the cemetery when we drank wine from red solo cups then dug up a headstone and carried it to the boot of my car.

The post Beach widows: War, death and the battles of those left behind appeared first on Gadgets To Make Life Easier.

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athompoprath-blog · 6 years

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The Journey of XXXtentacion

Jahseh Onfroy, or how he was better-known XXXtentacion, was the most controversial rapper in the hip-hop game in recent years. He became a mainstream artist with his first hit song “Look at Me”. The song at its peak reached 32nd on the billboard hot 100 lists, and would later be followed by his first studio album “17”. The album reached number two on the Billboard top 200 charts, but his next album “?” would finally reach number one. X was truly an enigma. He came from such a harsh background and had a career littered with controversy, yet he pushed forward and still managed to reach the top. Towards the beginning, his music was just another guy on SoundCloud trying to get people hyped, but towards the end of his time in the spotlight, the content of his music changed drastically. XXXtentacion’s music changed throughout his career and helped show how a teenager matures when entering adulthood.

In the early days of X’s career, he was either sole producer or collaborated with others on his beats. His first song to be released “Vice City” was co-produced between himself and Chriskentt. His early tracks showed that he was in touch with himself as he showed his feelings in the lyrics. Other songs that would follow before his blow up were songs produced with heavy drums, clattering hi-hats, and distorted sub-bass which was normal from SoundCloud rappers at the time. X managed to blend some of these bangers with ringing melodies that had a deeper meaning than the instrumental they were partnered with. A great example of this is the song “ALONE PART 2”. His music seemed like a way for him to escape from his reality and express how he viewed the world around him. Early tracks seem like he was in touch with his sentimental side and was not trying to appeal to a large audience for fame. All this would change with the release of his notorious banger “Look at me”

After the release of “Look at Me”, X’s name wasn’t an instant hit. It took some months for the song to even reach any charts and mainstream popularity. A crucial part of the success of this song came from the internet. Memes spread across social media using the song due to its intense drum and sub-beat leaving the audience in suspense as the beat cuts out and drops hard as it kicks again. Memes were the very lifeblood of this song exploding onto the charts. This very platform is exactly where most people first heard the song. After X saw that his song was exploding from this meme use, he followed the track with a track mocking a popular meme at the time “What in XXXTarnation”. Both songs were super harsh bangers just meant to appeal to a larger audience almost in the context of a joke. Due to X capitalizing on this, his image became one of a rapper who is just out here to capitalize on trends of the ridiculous internet. X became this character to the general public. The project to come out later named “Revenge” contained “Look at Me” as the first track along with a couple more tracks following in this same fashion. The project featured his close friend $ki Mask The Slump God, who made many of his hits in the same fashion as X. The album carries a consistent sound throughout and X never tries to break any barriers or expand on his current sound. All that changes with the release of his debut album.

X followed this album with an album that drew new fans into his music as it was so different from the popular X they had heard before. 17 was a ballad from X’s heart that showed just how human he was. In the first track, “The Explanation” he tells the audience that they will be entering his mind and is doing this for only acceptance and loyalty. The album was released solely for the purpose of helping those struggling with depression by giving them a work to relate to, and an album made to show they aren’t the only one struggling with these feelings of loneliness and sadness. The album as a whole goes through all the emotions one can feel in every aspect of life. From losing those closest you to just gaining the courage to step outside and face the world you dread living in. This album shocked many of his fans that were simply there to hear the bangers that were ridiculous and perfect for getting the hype. It was just so different from his hits audiences didn’t know what to think shortly after its release. I can remember the day the album came out. I had written X off as a ridiculous sell out of stereotypical bangers with no true content. I worked with a huge X fan who told me about the upcoming album weeks before it had come out. He brought a studio speaker to work and played the album for everyone as we opened. I’ll never forget the shock when he heard Jocelyn Flores for the first time. He expected to be treated to more of these bangers and was blown away by just how honest X was about dealing with his close friend committing suicide. As the album went on I was thoroughly impressed with this new sound of X. When it came to an end just 22 minutes after it began, we were all left with this feeling of unease and shock. The album had found a way to speak to everyone differently. We spent the day playing it over and over while working trying to dissect every little detail. This couldn’t possibly be the same artist who had been screaming “Can’t keep my d*** in my pants” on his breakout single. The album showed a sensitive side of this complex artist whose vision seemed scrambled and lost. It showed that X was human.

However, shortly after the release of 17, allegations of X abusing his pregnant girlfriend made the content of the album seem senseless. How could someone be so depressed and want sympathy while beating a pregnant woman he was supposed to love? The positive views of X’s new image were tarnished. He became an artist viewed as an abuser and a hothead who couldn’t handle the life he was living. During the same summer, video footage came out of X attacking a fan at a concert for throwing something on stage. His image was falling and falling. His fans remained his fans and tirelessly defended him for all the heinous acts he would commit. The music world was divided. Everyone had to either love or hate X. It was difficult to just be a fan of his music without supporting him as a person as well.

On March 16th, 2018 the world received “?”. This album was X’s first ever chart topper. In the first week, the album moved about 131,000 units. The album was the biggest step X took to becoming better. The album begins with X explaining why he felt he needed to create this album. He explains how the goal is to reach out for love and understanding of who he truly is. As the work progresses fans are treated to the X of new along with the X of old. He starts a with “ALONE PART 3” which is an instant call back to one of his classic records. The biggest hit from the album is the song “SAD!”. “SAD!” is one of the best songs of the summer of 2018. It was in constant rotation on playlists. The song has been in the top 100 for streaming on Billboard for 37 weeks and currently ranks at number 45. Songs like “Floor 555” remind us that X is in fact still the same artist who created “Look at Me”, but the rest of the album helps him show his talent and new image. The album was the start of something for X. It seemed like he had finally found a way to spread out his more positive message. If only he had the chance to do so.

On June 18th, 2018, X went on to Instagram live before going shopping for a motorcycle in Deerfield Beach, Fl. He went on about how if he is ever to die an untimely death or have to be a sacrifice, he just wants to know that he positively affected at least 5 million kid’s lives. Regardless of the bad talk around his name. No one knew that within 2 hours of him going live, he would be shot dead outside of the motorcycle shop in the same seat he recorded the live video in. X’s death was a shock to the hip-hop world. Artist such as J. Cole, Kanye West, and $ki Mask The Slump God went to social media to show their support to the late artist. X was a young talent that was taken from the world at the age of 20. He made mistakes in his life, but no one deserves to die at 20. His music had begun to spread a positive message and he was ready to become a more positive role model in an industry controlled by the gangster rapper stereotype. His music reflected his personal shifts throughout his career. With all the controversy around his name, he strived to become something better. We were beginning to see this lost teenager become a legend. Rest in Peace Jahseh Onfroy.

Works Cited

Staff, Billboard. “A Timeline of XXXTentacion's Career, From Soundcloud Rapper to Hip-Hop Sensation.” Billboard, Billboard, 19 June 2018, www.billboard.com/articles/columns/hip-hop/8461690/xxxtentacion-career-timeline.

“XXXtentacion - Discography.” Album of The Year, 2018, www.albumoftheyear.org/artist/30865-xxxtentacion/ .

Caulfield, Keith. “XXXTentacion's '?' Debuts at No. 1 on Billboard 200 Albums Chart.” Billboard, Billboard, 25 Mar. 2018, www.billboard.com/articles/columns/chart-beat/8260857/xxxtentacion-debuts-at-no-1-on-billboard-200-albums-chart.

Staff, Billboard. “XXXTENTACION Sad! Chart History.” Billboard, Billboard, 2018, www.billboard.com/music/xxxtentacion/chart-history/hot-100/song/1068732.

Vera, Amir. “Rapper XXXTentacion Shot Dead in Florida, Police Say.” CNN, Cable News Network, 19 June 2018, www.cnn.com/2018/06/18/entertainment/rapper-xxxtentacion-shot-dead/index.html.

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FICS https://twitter.com/yoonminet/status/734758544709451776 11 oktober 2016 Love at first sigh 4.2k words •Neighbor!AU/Shower duets• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4187631?view_adult=true + Paper Chase 9.3k words •Fraternity!AU/Roommates/Smut/Praise knk/Voyeurism• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5269130/chapters/12354437 Midnight Dreamers 14k words •Soulmates. They're something vague and the only clues to them lie within your dreams• http://archiveofourown.org/works/3546752/chapters/8024253 + Five times Jimin didn't know Yoongi was in love with him and one time he did 6.9k words •Fluff/Slight Angst/College AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/3648390 Untitled.mp3 13k words •College AU/Professor!YG/Student!JM/they move in together• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4593846 + "Yoonmin" http://archiveofourown.org/works/1456888?view_adult=true - I'm fully operational (and at your disposal 8.5k words •Collage!AU/Smut/Powerbottom!JM/5+1 things• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5846668/chapters/13538422 + _____ 17 oktober 2016 Soundtracks 38.8k words •Underground Rapper YG/Implied homophobia/Secret Relationship/Hate to Love/Smut/Fame• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7377988?view_adult=true 🎙💔 _____ 18 oktober 2016 Short domestic YM http://yoonminist.tumblr.com/post/151904404999/domestic-yoonmin-c Side Dishes 10.9k words •Actor!AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4352867?view_adult=true + ____ 19 oktober 2016 When you're in love all the lines get blurred 36k words •Pretend relationship/idk it's just fuckin lit• http://archiveofourown.org/works/3896845/chapters/8716723 ✨ I don't care if you're not sorry, I forgive you 3.8k words •AU/Bad Boy!YG/New kid!JM/Ice cream parlor/Slow build• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5815591?hide_banner=true Home is where the heart is 1.9k words •Fluff/YG sneaks into JMs bed/Non-AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4323231 Kissing Park Jimin feels nice, the way bubble baths and chocolate ice cream feel nice. ? Words •Idolverse!Yoonmin• http://1rapmon.tumblr.com/post/152015576946/jimin-and-yoongi-first-kiss-after-a-show ___ 20 oktober 2016 With pleasure 3.2k words •PWP/Daddy knk/Top!JM/Drunk YG/College AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8327047?view_adult=true ____ 25 oktober 2016 Look it up 17.6k words •Canon compliant/Fluff/Working through feelings/Ym celebrating chuseok was the sweetest I die• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8358208 💻✨ ____ 3 November 2016 F A V E S Studio Sessions 6.7k words •Smut/fluff/Non-AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8002540 👌🏻🍊 Tokyo Nights 15.9k words •Fluff/Working through feelings/SMUT/Both top:)• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8071891?view_adult=true Snatched me baLD💛🍊 Into the light 17.5k words •Drama/Angst w a happy ending/Smut/Fluff/Established relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8241053 💔🍊 _____ 4 november 2016 I want to wake up (I hate this dream) 2.5k words •Nightmares/First kiss/Mutual pining• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6732937 Sandalwood and Clove 27k words •Oracle!AU/Top!YG/Romance/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7968904/chapters/18410686 + ____ 5 November 2016 The five times Jimin called Yoongi hyung 3.1k words •Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/3919006?view_adult=true The 100 Day love challenge 19.2k words •Non-AU/Variety shows/Challenges• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6533389 Let me entertain you 3.3k words •Halloween/Lap dancing/DT• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8424292?view_adult=true Can I, hyung? 3.1k words •PWP/first time swallowing/rimming• http://archiveofourown.org/works/3943594 We pass in front of a flower shop (and I catch the scent of roses) 7.6k words •Flower shop AU/Fluff/Misunderstandings/Past homophobia/Light angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6027268 281 100k words worth so far _______ 6 nov 2016 Take my hand (take my whole life too) 1.9k words •Canon compliant/fluff/light angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7807564 Dangyunhaji 1.1k words •Rookie king/Bangtan gayo/canon compliant/Fluff n humor• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6199711 Unconventional 2.2k words •HJ/Exhibitionism• http://archiveofourown.org/works/1567112 Tied up (but far away) 1.7k words •Romantic fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8342944 _____ 7 November 2016 Pull me closer in the backseat of your rover 15k words •College AU/FWB• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8161895?view_adult=true Tattooed heart 3.5k words •Tattoo artist!YG/College student!JM/Fluff/implied smut/tattoos• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7236649 🌸 ____ 8 November 2016 Feel so hot on your lap (let me ride it out) 3.4k words •Wake up smut/BJS/Riding• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6049123?view_adult=true ✨ ___ 9 November 2016 Fall for you , do what I do (only fools) 1.8k words •Light angst/Hinted character death• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8421142 Bend me like a uttanasana 6.6k words •Yoga/Ass appreciation/Awkward boners/Smut/Frottage/Mirror smut/fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7404226 ____ 11 November 2016 Deeply addicted (to the prison that it you) 33.7k words •Romance/Fluff/Smut/Canon verse/a lot of smut tags yikes• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8238167?view_adult=true ______ 12 November 2016 Tell me (Now, now, now) 3.8k words •Endgame YM/Drama/Smut/Slight fluff/DT/Cheating• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5096189?view_adult=true ____ 13 November 2016 I'm outside the door (invite me in) 4.7k words •Neighbor AU/YG has a cat that loves JM• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6172717 My ears are ringing 2.4k words •College AU/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4752341 Experto crede 10k words •Assassins/Hitmen AU/Coffee shop AU sort of/Angst/Referenced abuse/Violence/Hitman!YG• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5798677/chapters/13432339 Give me a sign 11.5k words •Soulmate AU/Deaf!YG/Coffee shop/Café AU/Barista!JM/Set in Spain• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6706276 For you, Hyung 1.3k words •Mile high club/Airplane smut/Fluff/Non-AU/Light D/S• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5994607?view_adult=true _____ 14 November 2016 Where worlds collide and days are dark 17.1k words •Hitman AU/Action/Angst/OT7/it's really dark I didn't like this• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4519662/chapters/12194405 I'll be home for Christmas (Christmas shorts🎄v adorable) 4.8k words •Fluff/Christmas/Innuendo/Alcohol/First kiss/Smut/switch(?)• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5447030?view_full_work=true ____ 17 November 2016 A Busan Boy 2.2k words •Fluff/Slight angst/Astraphobia/Cuddles/Thunderstorms• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8553487 Indestructible 11.5k words •Zombie apocalypse AU/Child!JK/Platonic Jikook/Supernatural elements/Jimin centric• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6096010 Imprinted on my heart 2.5k words •Soulmates/Same fingerprints/First kiss/Enemies to lovers/Bad boy!JM/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6695896 _____ 18 November 2016 Knight 15.4k words •Royalty AU/Fluff/Smut w feelings/Violence/Archer!YG/Prince!JM/Kind of forbidden love• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8108881/chapters/19248976 👑🏹 ______ 21 November 2016 Wrong stop 5.7k words •Bus driver!YG/Student!JM/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/2329427 Hush 436 words •one sided/masturbation• http://archiveofourown.org/works/2079003?view_adult=true Accidents were made to happen (but dear god that is still embarrassing) 2.8k words •Humor/Text speak/Fluff/College AU/Crack• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8470597 THIS IS FUNNY AS DICKS Painting Planets 1k words •AU/Graffiti/"Bad bois"• http://archiveofourown.org/works/1371883 http://archiveofourown.org/works/4017505/chapters/9029788 Brown petals and broken stems 4.5k words •Bad boy!YG/Sweet boy!JM/AU/Mentions of underage drinking/non graphic description of injuries/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4115988/chapters/9300756 Cute K.O 1.3k words •Fluff/YG accidentally punched JM• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4909402 Our names 8.4k words •Fluff/Romance/High school AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4460210 We'll do the things that lovers do 3.8k words •High school AU/Romance/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5045428 ____ 23 November 2016 Speak to me 2.2k words •Soulmate AU/Deafness• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4805498 _____ 24 November 2016 Two bowls of jajangmyeon 15k words •You rub my back I rub yours/Platonic vmin• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4236240?view_adult=true 🍜 Put on a show 1.4k words •PWP• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8633266?view_adult=true _____________ 25 November 2016 Headphones on (don't talk to me) 1.4k words •Dancer!JM/Music major!YG/Fluff/College AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8638453/chapters/19810726 Hey moon, don't you go down 847 words •Non AU/Fluff/Established relationship/Cuddling• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8633083 _____ 27 November 2016 A crew of two (or three) 2.2k words •AU/Single dad!JM/Fluff/Comedy/First meetings/Grocery shopping/Protective!JM/Suspicious!YG• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6519814 daddies - LITERALLY _____ 29 November 2016 Yoongi and the real boy 88.6k words •Cyborgs/Androids/Smut/Bi!YG/ Implied biphobia/Cyborg!JM/Author!YG• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4725923/chapters/11229076☕️📚 __________ 1 December 2016 Been waiting for you to make a move 10.9k words •Fluff n Smut/Humor/Library smut/JM w sweater paws and glasses/College AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8667412?view_adult=true + ___ 5 December 2016 You caught my eye 2.1k words •Fluff/Optometrist!JM/Shy!YG/Awkward flirting• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8680414 ______ 6 December 2016 Playground 9k words •Single parent!JM/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5169815?view_adult=true + Hiraeth 27.3k words •Neighbor AU/Homesickness/Fluff/Angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4507467/chapters/11556592 + A galaxy of shooting stars could never compare to you (and darling why would they) 11.6k words •5+1 things/College AU/Fluff/Minor angst/Pianist!YG/Premed!JM/Astronomy/First kiss• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8663452 ☀️⭐️ ____ 7 December 2016 Body language 3.9k words •Touching/Fluff/Implied smut/• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6578932 + Too close to the sun (I fell for you, I always do) 10k words •Greek mythology/Soulmate AU/Icarus!YG/Sun!JM/Lots of fluff/BEAUTIFUL FUCKING POETRY• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8575900 ☀️🌊💞 ____ 8 December 2016 Why is a dude shopping at Victoria secret? 3.3k words •AU/Fluff/Awkward flirting n conversations/Bi!YG• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8767939 I want to tell you something 2.2k words •Bit fluff/Bit angst/Bit smutty/PWP/Coming out http://archiveofourown.org/works/8760661 - You're jealous (is it an inferiority complex?) 2.9k words •College AU/Fluff/Romance/Pining/5+1 things/Jealousy• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8750230 ___ 9 December 2016 Blame it on the elevator 3.7k words •College AU/Humor/Mild smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5740573?view_adult=true Where the heart is 16k words •Single parent AU/Fluff/Romance• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4305018/chapters/9769446 👨‍👨‍👧 Touches 2.8k words •Fluff/Smut/BTM!YG/Established relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4409756?view_adult=true + 2:58AM 2.3k words •Kissing/Fluff/Established relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7711195 Backtracking 2.6k words •Apocalypse AU/Implied minor character deaths/References to canon/Mentions of smut/Slow dancing• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4556580 ____ 10 December 2016 Blow 1.9k words •High school AU/Recreational drug use/Shotgunning/BJs/Smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8473114?view_adult=true _____ 11 December 2016 Make a move (before I make a move) 49.4k words •College AU/Road trip AU (on YGs motorcycle!)/Recreational drug use/Smut/Non penetrative tho/Toys/Inspired by music/Beautiful relationship tbh/YG calls JM angel n I melt/also JM strips on an actual pole• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7496595 🏍🏩🚬 ______ 12 December 2016 Because of you 37k words •College AU/I can't remember it very well but I think I liked it??• http://archiveofourown.org/works/2726624/chapters/6879479 ______ 15 December 2016 Some simple instructions (for a good a first impression) 2.3k words •Starbucks AU/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4376828 ☕️ _____ 17 December 2016 You wish I was yours (and I hope that you're mine) 55k words •Summer break/Friends to lovers/eventual smut/bad boy!YG/Soft!JM/Fluff/Crack/Angst/Coming of age/Smoking/Firsts• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6987934/chapters/20336239 💐🏞🏚 ____ 18 December 2016 Light, faded blue 1.1k words •Fluff/smut hinted at the end• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8868409 Finally (you and me are the lucky ones this time) 3.1k words •Blind date AU/Fluff/5 times• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4569573 ____ 19 december 2016 Hey Mr. DJ 2.2k words •AU Modern setting/Clubbing• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5533793 _____ 20 December 2016 The dutiful brother and his sister's way too handsome boyfriend 27.6k words •Fake dating(not on their part)/Misunderstandings/Fluff/Romance/Pining• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5924095/chapters/14398165 "👫"= 👭👬💛 ____ 21 December 2016 Bet on me 2.9k words •Fake dating AU/Fluff/Carnival• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6588661 Hold me tight 1.6k words •Established relationship/Kissing n cuddling/Fluff/Romance• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5881426 ____ 25 December 2016 Good morning, Hyung. 3.1k words •Fluff/Sleep talking• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6304234/chapters/15735664 _____ 27 December 2016 The sound of us 1.7k words •Fluff/New year's fluff/Piano lessons/Secret relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6118066 _____ 29 December 2016 You don't have to say I love you (to say I love you) 8.9k Words •Non-AU/Fluff/Romance• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5409530/chapters/12713525 + Don't tempt me, undress me 2.8k words •Angel!JM/Demon!YG/Humour/Tension/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6648937 + Too short 2k words •it's about JMs fascination with YGs fingers, go figure• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8488867?view_adult=true Tickle me pink 2k words •Fluff/Tickling knk(??)/Smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7892644 + _____ 30 December Cold nights 1k words •Non-AU/BJ• http://archiveofourown.org/works/1444315 Lost in lust 2k words •smut un public idk• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6421297 Out of your arms (I'm out of my mind) 6k words •Lob/Porn with Plot/Infidelity• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7266811/chapters/16499869 + _____ 31 December 2016 Whether it's a man or a woman, my tongue will send you to Hong Kong 2k words •Morning smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4324569?view_adult=true _____ 1 Jan 2017 The one with the hiding 8.6k words •Friends!AU/Romance/Humor/Secret relationship/Implied smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7432909/chapters/17206909 + ______ 2 Jan 2017 In black ink (My lust may still shine bright) 7.4k words •Tattooed!YG/Smut/DT/idk it's cute• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8735260 + ______ 5 Jan 2017 you and me (are the difference between real love and the love on tv) 5k words •Humor/OT7 funsies/They drunk/Of course-game/Fluff• https://archiveofourown.org/works/4820570 ______ 6 Jan 2017 The world, as viewed from a park bench. 8k words •Feelings/Romantic comedy• http://archiveofourown.org/works/2330381#main Make me your wish 12.2k words •Genie!AU/Romance/Fluff/Slight Angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7827214#main Chocolate baby 5k words •Vet!AU/Holly is ygs babby/Implied smut/Cute• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9213242#main + _______ 7 Jan 2017 Just kissing 2k words •Detention/and well u kno• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7124020?view_adult=true ______ 12 Jan 2017 The way I fuck him (you'd think I love this--) 4.9k words •never fucking ending/Soccer!AU/Rivalry/A LOT OF SMUT OK/Overstimulation/also rough and semi public and possessive• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9176971?view_adult=true#main + Min Yoongi never gets jealous! 1.5k words •Fluff/Drabble/Kindergarten teacher!JM• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4740140 Do you give in? 1.5k words •straight bois/HJ• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8071597 Pillow talk 1.3k words •Established relationship/Fluff/Smut/Humor/AMAZING• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7354612 + _____ 14 Jan 2017 Building Bridges 2.8k words •Smut/Canon compliant• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9091495?view_adult=true _____ 16 jan 2017 Step brothers, ... right? 4K words http://archiveofourown.org/works/9332048?view_adult=true _____ 22 Jan 2017 Are you real? 1.1k words •Fluff/Canon compliant• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8732437 _____ 28 Jan 2017 Keep your ring finger empty 1.3k words •Fluffff/pet names• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8772157 Milky Way 8.6k words •Art student!JM/Underground rapper!YG/fluff http://archiveofourown.org/works/8652664?view_adult=true Kill of the night 3.9k words •PWP/Dom JM b riding YG/Oversensitivity• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8172385?view_adult=true ✨ ____ 29 Jan 2017 The bitter taste of life (and coffee) 2.7k words •Fluff/Barista!YG/Sad!JM• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8725711?view_adult=true _____ 30 Jan 2017 Give me your full attention 3.6k words •PWP/Roommates/DT• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8027677 비가 오는 짙은 색 서울 그 위에 2.2k words •Fluff/Smut/Established relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9380624?view_adult=true Let's kick the tires and light the fires 9k words •humor/businessman!JM/Rapper!YG/enemies to friends to lovers• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9468698 + Just for today (if I can't help it) 1.3k words •PWP/Canon compliant• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9504230?view_adult=true _______ 31 Jan 2017 Strawberry Lube 82.7k words •Internalized homophobia/Slow build/Fluff&Angst/Smut/fucking unexpected twist lmao• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4527492/chapters/10301361? view_adult=true 🤧🍓🏫🏀✨ Wash away my loneliness 8k words •Car wash AU/fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6512506 Hey gentlemen (wait a minute) 2.5k words •Canon compliant/Petty YG/Very sorry JM/Established relationship/Fluff/HJ• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8604289?view_adult=true ______ 1 feb 2017 Moan it like you mean it 2.4k words •Mild voyeurism/pwp/mutual m• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6412825/chapters/14680699 + Birthdays come with great gifts 3.6k words •Lap dance/Frottage• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6412825/chapters/14986030?view_adult=true + Keep watch don't stray your eyes 2.1k words •Consensual voyeurism/Solo mstb/dillidoo• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6412825/chapters/16672387?view_adult=true ______ 3 feb 2017 Watch me pretty 1.9k words •Canon compliant/HJ/Mirrors/Praise knk• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6412825/chapters/16985202?view_adult=true Smoke me up, Turn me out 2.6k words •Recreational drug use/Fluff/Underage JM/Shotgunning• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7557202 The twelve cranial nerves 3.1k words •Science!AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4555767 ____ 8 feb 2017 Baby blue (I'll bloom for you) 38k words •Car racing!AU/Smut/BDSM/Strong(power ty) language• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4830902 _______ 12 feb 2017 Study break 3.2k words •PWP/Power btm!YG/breath play/College!AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6146298?view_adult=true I'll be a gentleman (cause I'll be your boyfriend 21k words •College!AU/Pretend relationship/Fluff/Smut/pining• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9658577#main 🏫👬👨‍❤️‍👨💛 _____ 14 feb 2017 Level me crazy 4K words •Gamer!AU/Fluff/Humor• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7330783 + There goes the carousel 3k words •Amusement park!AU/Crack/Romance/Misunderstandings• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7531432 + Chain me up, baby 1.5k words •College!AU/Chain letters/Fluff/Humor• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7282495 Cockfession 1.9k words •Fluff/Crack/A LOT of dick jokes• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5720689 Could I get a volunteer? 2.8k words •Crack/Weddings/Drama• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5399399 Beauty in all forms 4.7k words •AU/flower shop & tattoo parlor/tattoos/discrimination/shyness/fluff/smut• http://archiveofourown.org/collections/yoonminficrec_exchange/works/7401169 🌸 _____ 15 feb 2017 Just like a tattoo (I'll always have you) 2.9k words •AU/Tattoo parlor/Fluff/Implied sexual content/JM is a soft/tattoo artist!YG• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9487568 + Street race yoonmin? 2.6k words •Street racing/PWP• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9715952?view_adult=true ______ 16 feb 2017 See normal people (we're not part of them) 10.3k words •Vigilantism/Officer!YG/Thief!JM/Married couple/Domestic fluff/Humor• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9664037 ____ 18 feb 2017 Change (can be amazing) 5.4k words •Journalist!JM/Rapper!YG/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6352960 it's cute Hello, I'm Min Yoongi, and I'm not desperately in love with you. 13.4k words •Canon compliant/PINING/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9521771 + ____ 19 feb 2017 This town 13k words •Kindergarten teacher!JM/Single parent!YG/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9063571 _____ 20 feb 2017 Looking for a non-platonic hand holder 4.9k words •Blind date AU/Fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7360540 cute I really really want ya 2.5k words •College AU/Clubbing/Implied smut• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9727505?view_adult=true ________ 23 feb 2017 Love is not a coincidence (it's fate) 10.6k words •Child to Adult timeline/Fluff/Romance• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8445127#main + Singing myself (and you) to sleep 4.3k words •WWII AU/PTSD/Soldier!JM/Doctor!YG/Hurt|Comfort• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9873545 _______ 23 feb 2017 ???? Nice n short •PWP/Baths n shit• http://suga-beagle.tumblr.com/post/157144423108/nsfw-bathtub-sex-cause-why-not-happy-new ______ 24 feb 2017 I'm glad you're my first (first for everything) 12.8k words •Collage!AU/First times/Fluff/Smut/Opposites attract/Light angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/5902192 ✨ _______ 27 feb 2017 Your silence only makes me want to wreck you more 4.3k words •PWP/dom|dom/Control freaks/Ridin/JM in a garter only👀• https://archiveofourown.org/works/7080193?view_adult=true#main + ______ 28 feb 2017 Black gold 6.4k words •Neighbor!AU/PWP/Vibrators/BJ/After care/Power btm!JM• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6574981 ____ 2 mars 2017 You're my future 1.6k words •college AU/mpreg/fluff/light angst• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7849027 Backstage 5.7k words •Musical theater AU/actor!JM/Costume director!YG/BJ• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9652943?view_adult=true Sleepover 2.8k words •PWP/DT/YG's throat gets messed up• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6501511 _____ 4 mars 2017 4a.m 788 words •Mpreg/Fluff/Cravings/Hubby's• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7191521 cute As it comes 3.6k words •Mpreg/Domestic fluff• http://archiveofourown.org/works/6220174 Like a lollipop 1.9k words •Non AU/BJ• http://archiveofourown.org/works/4634481?view_adult=true Transparent 827 words •Ghost!JM/Exhibitionism/YG mustardb8• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8222078?view_adult=true _____ 5 mars 2017 It's you and me (but I'd like to be we) 7.4k words •PWP/Angst/They're bad at feelings• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7077769/chapters/16283561 Take me to church 5k words •Demon!YG/Student!JM/Smut/also a bit of actual feelings• https://twitter.com/artsytaetae/status/838300144231645185 I'm in love (cause I wanna love you, baby) 1.2k words •Non AU/FLUFF• http://archiveofourown.org/works/7703173#main tooth rotting fluff ok _________ 6 mars 2017 White Noise 55.5k words •Soulmates/Non AU/Pretend relationship/Fluff/Slight angst/Smut/Romance/Humor• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9194102/chapters/22007810 👨‍❤️‍👨🏋🏻💢⁉️☕️❤ _______ 7 mars 2017 Of thunder and lightning 5.3k words •First time/Tattooed n pierced!YG/Cute Student!JM/PWF• http://archiveofourown.org/works/9478199 _____ 8 mars 2017 Pillow talk 1.5k words •PWP/or JM pillow humping rly/DT/Canon compliant/Established relationship• http://archiveofourown.org/works/10082645 _____ 9 mars 2017 Dream team 4.7k words •ABO dynamics/Mating cycles|In heat/Knotting/College AU• http://archiveofourown.org/works/8886604?view_adult=true Give me more 2.7k words •ABO dynamics/Mating cycles|in heat/Knotting/Canon verse• http://archiveofourown.org/works/1240720?view_adult=true

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