#i was at red rocks and holy fuuuck

[carlos-in-glasses]

Carlos-in-Glasses Goes to Paris

For prosperity I’ve written up my experience of the First Responders Reunion Convention – which is my first convention experience. And what an overwhelmingly good and stressful time it was. Under the cut is my attempt to capture my memories and the essence of it, rather than a transcription of panels and meeting rooms, as others have already done the good work (or will be). I hope you find this interesting and useful if you do read, and if you have any specific questions (including about travelling alone/logistics/issues I had) I’ll do my best to provide a coherent answer.

I am very tired and this is slightly manic but here we go:

Friday: If you are among those who waited in line for three hours to register for the convention, even if I did not see or interact with you….I feel we are spiritually bonded forever by the experience. Blimey, crikey, and bloody hell. It was not clear at all how long the wait would be, but I was not expecting that! However, there was an undeniable thrill in the air. I was in pain all over, yet happy. By the late evening, dinner was half a tube of Pringles and a glass of red wine.

Saturday: Breakfast was four croissants. I actually recommend this because they really did carry me through until lunch. Not long after arriving, we were milling about in the lobby waiting for the opening ceremony to begin - when Ronen walked past up on the mezzanine/ balcony thing, waving to us, all fabulous and just….there in the flesh?!!!...and revealing his hair. We’d speculated that he’d dyed it pink or the bisexual pride flag colours, or “wouldn’t it be funny if it’s just brown?!” And it was brown! And it WAS Funny.

The opening ceremony was a trip lol. Holy shit. They played a music video compilation of the actors from each show (I never want to hear How to Save a Life by The Fray ever again. Jk jk don’t come for meee). There was an undulation of incredibly loud screaming whenever particular actors popped up on screen, so it was like being on a rollercoaster that wasn’t moving. Adrenaline was high by the time all the actors walked out on stage and say hello. It’s hard to explain exactly how bonkers it is to be in the same physical space as Ronen, Rafa, Sierra and Natacha and see their non-TV dimensions… TANGENT TIME:

….Speaking of dimensions! I tried to pay close attention to the height difference between Ronen and Rafa, but it’s also an optical illusion in real life? FYI, I’m 5 ft 7 – Ronen didn’t seem massively taller than me, Rafa did seem massively taller than me; next to each other it was like there was nothing in it. But in my photos they’re both much taller than me and Ronen looks slightly the biggest I think 🤔 So I have no clue what’s going on. In fact, I’m more confused than ever.

After the opening ceremony (which I fled from because fuuuck) I was waiting around due to rocking up early for my meeting room by accident. The schedule was a confusing design and I was far from the only person who was doing a sort of 'hit-and-hope' when it came to figuring out where to be and when, especially as things almost immediately overran, so other activities got moved around/ postponed. ANYWAY – Ronen walked right past with a member of staff who was instructing him. I overheard him tell her “It’s okay…I’m a pro at this.” He really did wander around like he owned the place. At one point he strolled through the lobby with an unlit cigarette in his mouth.

My first activity was the meeting room with Ronen and Rafa (ie. a group of a set number of people in a room with actors for half an hour). By chance it turned out that I was sitting almost right next to them, with a gap left for the door between us. So, super close. And obviously they were both mesmerising. This was the meeting room where Rafa said “To catch the murderer, Carlos has to behave like one”, and explained that Carlos would have to murder parts of himself. His emphasis was on how Carlos’ innocence has been taken from him because his father’s life was stolen. For what it’s worth, I interpreted this as Rafa viewing the whole thing very much from an dramatic actor’s standpoint, and how he needs to get into the mindset of Carlos’ particular grief metaphorically, rather than meaning anything literal. He speaks quite intensely and thoughtfully and his choice of words is often bold. For anyone concerned about it, just remember he was asked a question and responded off the cuff the best he could in the moment, with limited time. He doesn’t write the show and I guess he’s making assumptions based on how season 4 left off, like the rest of us, unless he’s had very specific conversations with Tim (which, maybe! But he wouldn’t be able to give anything away. We don’t know anything). Then, when Ronen brought up TK dying (because Ronen always dies in the films/TV he does – using an axe to the chest as an example) it was pointed out that Tarlos is endgame, so he can’t die. Cue Rafa being like “Carlos could die with him! They die together!” I was like goodness me lads it’s early in the morning for this. I needed a brandy afterwards.

Next up was my Tarlos Duo Photoshoot. As noted above, everything had fallen behind schedule, and things were starting to get switched around. Honestly, it was confusing, daunting and stressful (please note: Am VERY easily confused, daunted, and stressed). But thanks to the power of following others and asking questions, I ended up where I needed to be. When it was my turn, Rafa immediately and warmly put his arm around me to pose but Ronen was talking to a staff member, so Rafa and I were just… touching each other for a good few seconds before Ro joined us! I took the opportunity to thank Rafa for doing this for us, but I can’t remember how he responded. Then the photo was taken. I told them they’re both amazing, they said “aw thanks” at the same time, and again I fled the scene. As there are so many people, the shoot you have is super speedy. I advise really trying to keep your cool even though it’s a highly flustering situation. You don’t want it to become a total blur or something you regret, because it really is lovely to be next to them and quickly say a few words and get a keepsake afterwards.

My next activity was autographs and selfies with Natacha and Sierra. A super lovely thing. I gave them cards I'd written (as I also did for Rafa and Ronen the next day). Sierra was an absolute highlight for me. Just the warmest, kindest person. A total joy. She opened her card in front of me and I was like nooooo don't. It truly felt like she’d come to the convention for the opportunity to meet us, rather than the other way around. She told me she liked my outfit and said I look beautiful in pink. Similar to what I said to Rafa, I thanked her and told her I can’t imagine what it’s like for them to do this, expecting her to quickly say “oh you’re welcome” or something. But she started having a mini-philosophical conversation with me about the nature of fame and fandom! Then she said “it is overwhelming in the best way” because she gets to see the human heart behind all the messages etc (I’m paraphrasing). I said “it’s all about love” and she said “yes! It’s all about love, absolutely.” She was a true delight. And Natacha is a blast. She also complimented my pink outfit and I was like ???? Thanks????!!! Gahhh. The selfies came out way more flattering than the photoshoot. The lighting. Oof.

The last Saturday thing for me was the panel with Ronen and Rafa. It was quite brief but there were some real gems. Rafa saying he only has eyes for Tarlos. Ronen saying “Safe in their apartment holding on to each other. I think Carlos is TK’s honeymoon.” I melted. I let our an audible aww.

Sunday: The first thing was a Lone Star quiz in the panel room with Natacha and Sierra. They were so fun and such good sports. Then it was the Lone Star panel, where Natacha, Sierra, Ronen and Rafa were all on stage together answering fan questions. It was really nice to see them all interact, banter and laugh together. Sierra made a point of saying they’re all close in real life and hang out in their free time. There was a great vibe between them and such a good atmosphere in the room. I loved it when Rafa told Ronen that he was out of rhythm when it came to learning the pilot episode line dance; Ronen argued that he smashed it and there's video evidence. Rafa's response was "Sweetie, no."

I then had the autograph and selfie sessions with Rafa and Ronen, but because the Lone Star panel overran, suddenly Ronen had his photoshoot session instead, so I had a clash between going to that or staying downstairs for Rafa. I was trying to figure out what to do until the queen that is @actuallysara got some clarity from a staff member and we went up to Ronen, but by that point the upper level by the studio was crowded and chaotic. Be advised to prepare for disarray if you’ve never been to a convention before. It might be that you experience no scheduling issues or confusion, but just be prepared for the advent anyway. As it happened, I was through quickly for my photo with Ronen – again thanks to Sara locating the door! Ronen, hungover, was wearing his sunglasses, so I wore mine. He did a dumb pose without saying anything; I grinned at the camera and then thanked him and ran off again to get back downstairs where Rafa was still signing autographs. I got to tell him he plays my favourite character of all time and we took a selfie I really love ahhhh. Then Rafa had to leave for his photoshoot – which was my next thing – so I ran back upstairs and was one of the first in line! So I was like “heeey nice to see you again so soon…!” He remembered my name – I guess because he’d only just written it down 😅 I thanked him for the 10th time – just couldn’t stop thanking everyone like I’d caught a disease where the symptom is permanent gratitude. THEN I ran downstairs to do the autograph and selfie with Ronen, who was running late – so that got postponed to the afternoon after we’d already waited a long while. When it did happen it was great - I can't remember what I said to him but I assume it was polite and made sense – although a chaotic queuing system again ensued. A whole long line of us were crushed together in the heat. I had an Aperpol spritz after and when I tell you I’d never needed a drink like that more…

That was it for my paid activities! Unknown to me at the time, my final glimpse of Ronen, Rafa, Sierra and Natacha was when I was sitting on the floor eating Ritz Crackers while they were wandering past on their way to/from whatever they were doing next. It felt so normal to see them around at that point. We gathered for the closing ceremony, thinking we’d see all the actors on stage once more for a goodbye, but the ceremony had to happen without any of the actors because of running late. So, I cherish my ‘seeing them in the hallway’ memories.

Overall feelings and would I do it again? If you’ve never been to a convention before but want to, do go into it with open eyes: There’s potentially a lot of waiting around and standing in line for a long time in a hot space (sometimes the line is more like a shapeless crowd and you don’t know where it begins and ends). Some of the activities are quite rushed. They fall behind schedule easily and you have to be agile about where to go next and what to do. The Dream It team worked super hard and could do with employing more staff in stewarding roles, ideally wearing something that identifies them as such (the staff blended in with the visitors of the convention). But I don’t know the economics of their staffing situation so maybe they can’t grow the team. Anyway, having more signs up also would have been useful. When you do get your moment with Ronen, Rafa, Sierra, Natacha though – or whoever you have come to see – it really is beautiful and meaningful.

Right now, I’m flipflopping – but mainly I think once is enough for me, unless they come to a convention the UK. There’s a couple of aspects I’d like to ‘do over,’ but perhaps not enough to try to recreate the magic a second time, given the expense of it?? That might change over the coming months – we’ll see! I went to this convention with the goal of meeting Ronen and Rafa (with Natacha and a Sierra being a glorious bonus as I booked it long before they were announced as guests) to tell them in person thank you and I love you – and I achieved that. I do think it was worth my money, but it is very expensive and tiring. I was lucky to be in a good position to pay for it this year, which might not be the case going forward. You really need to be able to afford to do it, and genuinely want to do it, knowing you’re paying money for something that is going to have some hard and challenging aspects as well as the amazing and joyful. Personally, I love that I went once. I didn’t love the Super Endurance Test of 2023 that was standing in line for three hours on Friday after travelling hahaaaaaa god. I loved the selfies and autograph sessions. I didn’t love the photoshoot outcomes but I loved that I’ve had Rafa’s large hand on my shoulder because I'm slutty so. I love that I looked into both his and Ronen’s eyes and told them how great they are. I love that I uploaded my selfie with Rafa to my instastory and he viewed it, so there’s just a line of my friends’ names, then actuallyrafa, then a line of my friends’ names 🤣

I also want to note that in real life, compared to footage of them in interviews/insta lives/wherever, I think you get even more of a sense of just how different they are to their characters. It made me respect them all even more than I already did, which I didn’t think was possible. They are SO talented.

BUT most importantly: The reason why this was so brilliant was @actuallysara, without whom I wouldn’t have thought I could travel alone to Paris and do this at all. Sara, meeting you and giving you a big hug was also the dream. You are so helpful and knowledgeable and kind ,and once again your flags were a fantastic idea and I’m so happy I got to sign them. I hope I get to see you again very soon. Thank you from the depths of my soul. @meditating-honey-badger (and your fabulous companion…!) it was a true delight to hang out, and chill out, and have such funny and deep conversations. You are an absolute light and I loved meeting you. I hope so much to see you again too. Like Sara, it could never be too soon. And @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut. What can I say. What can I possibly say. I want to make drinking on rooftop bars while talking about writing our thing. I’ve never done that with anyone else. We really went through this side by side and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I already miss you and I thank you too. You are, in fact, the warmest doughnut in town. All of you, forever ❤️. You made it what it was.

(Digitally applied giant aviator sunglasses and some editing so the Tarlos duo photoshoot doesn't count as a face reveal. Thank you also to the lovely people who made bracelets and handed them out.)

[animesmutfest]

So is noone else going to acknowledge how fine this man is? No? Okay I’ll do it for you. ✍🏽

Vulcan (aged up to be 21 since he’s 18) x Reader

This is much needed personally...

Prompts: “I thought we could do more than just kissing” and “don’t run from me baby girl, take it”

Type: Needy sex

It was a nice day outside so you decide to hit the park for a bit to get a good run in before getting cozy at home. You throw on your shorts, sports bra, and shoes before heading to the park near your house. About a mile into your run you see your best friend Vulcan running your way. He flags you down as you remove your headphones and halt your running. “Hey y/n! How it’s going he says panting. Hands on your hips you reply with “it’s going... how about yourself?”you say panting yourself as your eyes trail down his shirtless body. And good God he was never lacking. His abs has a sheet of sweat on them causing his skin to have a glow to it. You snap out of it and ask what he had said, you weren’t paying attention. “Oh I was just saying we should catch up tonight. How about I come over and we can do dinner and a movie.” He says smiling. “How about dinner and wine?” You ask lifting an eyebrow smirking. He chuckles and agrees “well it’s a date then, I’ll see you at my house around 5:30” you say before jogging away. He smiles to himself happy to get to hang out with you. You both have been best friends for over 6 years and there had been several times where you both felt that you wanted more but shoved aside your feelings as to not effect the friendship. Typical love story I know but not every love story includes a drunken make out session a month before this day. You both had had one too many and one thing led to another and then you found yourself on is lap making out with him. He stopped himself from going any further with you and had a taxi take you home so you didn’t have to have regrets (such a fucking gentleman). Anyway back to today. After your run you go home to shower and think of what to cook. You decide on a really nice vegan meal you tried a few weeks back. Turning on some music you as you get dressed throwing on some shorts and a oversized sweater with a turtle on it. You make your way to the kitchen as you get out all the things you’ll need as well as pouring a glass of red wine and changing the music to something more sensual. While cutting up the veggies you find yourself dancing a bit so you don’t even hear the door open and close. Vulcan walks towards the kitchen as the music plays with you singing along. He admires the view of your curves and how they moved to the beat before sneaking behind you, he bends down behind you a bit. “Nice moves” he yells loud enough for you to notice him. You jump hard turning around and playfully hitting him in the chest. He grabs your wrist and pulls you into him chest looking at you. You hug him pressing your face into his shirt. “I missed you” you say. He hugs you back squeezing tight as he kisses your head. You look up at him meeting his blushing face. Your face red as well from being held by him. Without thinking about it too much you grab his face caressing it before wrapping your arms around his neck pulling him into a tender kiss. He pulls away slowly seeing your eye lids low and filled with lust. He kisses you again with more passion than before with his hands rubbing up your sides. After making out a bit he pulls back again, both of you panting. “I-im sorry y/n I’ll stop now before things escalate” he says looking away blushing.

You grab his gaze before he could put distance between you both “I-I though we could do more than just kissing” you say seductively grabbing a fist full of his shirt with your hands. He grabs you by your neck and kisses you passionately, sliding his tongue in your mouth, and you happily accept it. You moan into the kiss and throw your arms back up around his neck biting his bottom lip. Wasting no time your hand slides down his sweats as you palm his dick. Your eyes widen at how big it was making you flinch a bit, he smirks kissing you harder. You couldn’t even hide your fear of his size but it was also exciting to know this monster was going to be inside you. You trail kisses down his jawline to his neck leaving marks everywhere you could to lay claim on him. He grabs your hand from his pants and picks you up aggressively, walking to the bedroom. Kicking the door open and getting on the bed with you under him. Releasing your grip you start pulling his shirt off. And he does the same throwing both on the floor. Vulcan takes off your bra tossing it as well before attacking your neck with his mouth. You moan lightly as he kneads your breasts with his huge hands. “I wanted you so fucking badly y/n and for so long” he growls in your ear. You feel your pussy throb at his voice as you push him off you and tug at the waistband of his sweats and boxers. He tenses up as his dick jumps out of the fabric meanwhile your drooling over it. You tie your hair back with the holder on your wrist as he watches somewhat nervous. You get on your knees and arch you back down licking up his long shaft before grabbing it and pumping him slowly. “Fuck” a low groan leaves his lips as you flick your tongue on his aching tip. He gently grabs your ponytail and you suck him down half way before bobbing slowly up on his dick. His moans were so sexy, so honest he was being as his grip tightened. Being a brat you go as deep as you can on his dick until it hits the center of your throat. His muscles tighten up and he throws his head back. “Holy s-shit baby~” he moans bucking his hips into your throat. You deep throat him moaning while doing so driving him absolutely insane. “Mmmmph yes baby girl suck it just like that~” he moans panting heavy. You speed up your actions and gently rub his thigh as you do so. You feel him grip the sheets next to him from the pleasure and you reach down with you other hand rubbing your pussy through your shorts. “Baby girl~” he cries out indicating he was close to cumming. Your sucking him harder than before while slamming him into your throat humming in satisfaction. “Fuuuuck baby~!! I’m cumming!” He yells as his hand leaves your head and rubs his own. You don’t stop though. His breathing all over the place as you continue to slurp him down. “W-wait baby aaahhh fuck~!” He moans as he pulls you from his dick. You keep your tongue out as spit drips from it. He throws you on your back and pulls your shorts and panties off. “I bet you taste as good as you look” he groans licking his lips at your wet pussy. Kissing your thighs softly before kissing your pussy lips. He slithers his tongue through your folds and on your clit sucking it gently. Your hand grab your breast as you slightly arch your back. He watches you from below as he devours you. “Mmmmph~” he moans as he laps at your clit. “Damn baby~” you moan loudly enjoying his mouth on you. “Tastes like honey baby girl” he say smiling at you. You feel your orgasm approaching swiftly as his tongue dances with your clit. “P-please baby~” you cry out egging him on. He understand and speeds up his movements throw your legs over his shoulder and spreading you further apart. Your pussy now throbbing as you grind your hips on his face. You orgasm was so intense from just his mouth. “Yesyesyes fuuuck~” you scream as he licks up your juices. Setting your legs down he proudly watches your body twitch before putting you on your stomach and moving your leg up towards your body. He climbs on top of you kissing your neck and back.

He takes some of your juices And rubs it on his dick, holding your waist with one hand he uses the other to rub his dick on your pussy. “I’m going in...” he says before moans escape his lips as he pushes the tip in causing you to gasp and grip the bedding. “Just relax baby” he moans rubbing your back for comfort as he slides the rest inside you. “FUUCK~”you scream as his tip kisses your cervix. The only thing you could think to do was close your eyes tight to cope with the pain from being stretched. Vulcan slowly rolls his hips into you making sure that you’re taking in all of him with each stroke. “Your doing so good baby “ he moans throwing his head back as another orgasm nearly rips through your core. “Oh no~ I’m.... im c-cumming again~” you cry out. He increases his speed just a bit to help your get there and only after two strokes you scream as your pussy clenches down on his dick making it hard for him to move. “Damn baby girl~ you look so gorgeous when you cum for me” he says before running his hands up your back. He then puts you on all fours for better support as he deepened his thrusts entering your cervix. You feel yourself pulling away from him clawing at the bedding, he noticed and grabs your hair pulling your face close to his. “don’t run from me baby girl. Take it!” He growls in your ear as he grabs your waist and fucks you with your back to his chest. He rubs your clit with one hand and wraps the other around your small body. Sucking on your neck leaving marks everywhere his mouth could reach in the position. “I’m going to make sure I take care of this beautiful body of yours from now on~” he moans into your skin. Your legs shake and tension builds up in your stomach as your pussy throbs on him. “I-I can’t take I-it anymore Vulcan... oh no~” you cry out as you knew what was about to happen. “Yes you can baby” he moans as you throw your head back on his shoulder as scream as you squirt on the bed gripping his arms. He had never seen a woman do this so it just turned him on more. “Damn that’s so sexy~” he moans and after a few more stroke he releases inside you becoming a panting mess. He lays back and you fall with him, dick still throbbing inside. After a minute or so you turn around on him and rock your hips slowly back and forth with him still inside.

He grabs your hips tightly trying to get you to stop but you just keep moving and moaning on top of him. “Y-y/n what are you doing mmmmph~” he moans gritting his teeth. After gaining some control over his breathing he sits up and grabs your legs putting them around his waist and wraps his arms around you pulling you down hard on his dick repeatedly. You lean down and kiss him as you both become a moaning mess from the pleasure. “I’m l-losing my mind baby~!” you cry out as you clench down once more. “It’s okay baby girl just let go.. a-and cum on daddy~” he moans in your ear speeding up. Throwing your head on his shoulder you scratch up his back from how intense it was. Your moans become whimpers and sobs as your body is overstimulated. He pulls your head to force you to look at him as he wipes away your tears slowing his thrusts down. Youwas drowning in emotions you had never felt before. “I-I love you Vulcan~!” You sob to him still making eye contact. His eyes widen and he lays you on your back without removing himself from inside you. Placing a gentle kiss on your lips before throwing your legs on his shoulder and pounding into you. “I love you too princess~” he moans as your minds melt into bliss. “I- I’m gunna cum again~” he growls as his pace quickens. You dig your nails in the backs on his arms as your were close again as well. Your pussy clenches down on him as if it were life or death. “Aahhh god~” you yell letting the pleasure wash over you. Big daddy Vulcan wasn’t too far behind as he slams into you a few more time before unloading inside again. “S-so fucking... good~” he moans as he rides out his high. His movements come to a halt as he releases your legs and lays on your chest panting with you. Your eyes flutter realizing what just happened. “T-that really just happened...” you say panting. He weakly looks up at you “any regrets?” He asks with worry on his face. “Are you kidding me?! Hell no. I’ve waited years to have this with you” you say chuckling a bit. “Well then I don’t have any either” he replies leaning up and kissing you tenderly. “Your mine now” he says. “And your mine” you reply.

Great... now I have to do more with him🤧

[buriednurbckyrd]

Necessary Paradox (11)

***Smut, ahoy! 

.

.

Y/N's symptoms were mild while she was still wearing the patches, but they both knew that her impending heat would likely be intense so they spent the first few days just relaxing enjoying each others company.  The first day was spent exploring all the rooms of the cabin, still in disbelief that it was now theirs.  The second day was cold, but clear and sunny, inviting them out to investigate the outdoor property. There was a path in the back of the house that led to a serene duck pond. A stone patio beside it would be shaded by the trees in the spring and summer, making it an ideal place to lounge.  Steve snapped a picture of Y/N looking out over the water, her face turned to the setting sun.  Her peaceful expression painted gold with the light was an image he wanted to treasure forever.  

When she peeled off the last patch and threw it away she insisted they open a bottle of sparkling wine to celebrate.  They drank the expensive alcohol with frozen pizza in front of the fire.  Steve told her stories about growing up in the 40s, the war, and Peggy.  Tears rolled down her face as he described how it was to see her again after being unfrozen, how her memory had faded in and out when he visited her, and the heartbreak he felt when he helped carry her casket into the church for her funeral.  

He even told her about the complicated and brief relationship between him and Sharon. Y/N's past had been laid bare from the beginning, and he felt guilty, like he had been hiding things from her.  She assured him that that wasn't the case.  It hadn't felt right until then to tell her; the two of them stretched out on the plush rug soaking up the warmth of the fire.  The nearly empty bottle of wine on the coffee table with the few remaining crumbs from their dinner.  

...  

Two days later and Steve woke up drowning in her scent.  She had always smelled amazing, but now it made his mouth water like a starving man being given a feast.  His eyes opened and he looked down at her, she was curled up at his side, bare arm thrown over his stomach.  Her brow was furrowed in her sleep and her hips moved restlessly against him.  He groaned softly and rubbed his hand over his eyes.  

He was hard and throbbing in his pajama pants.  It was much more than a normal morning phenomenon, it was unbridled lust for the Omega squirming in her sleep and smelling like sex and every delicious thing he could possibly fathom.  If he moved he would wake her and half of his Alpha brain thought that was an excellent idea.  But the other half, the protective and nurturing half was loathe to pull her from her slumber.  He probably could have laid there and suffered in silence if it weren't for the soft, breathy way she called out his name.

“Steve...��� She tipped her head back as if she were looking right at him, though she was still lost in her dream.  Her fingers dug gently into his skin.  

“Y/N.” He answered in a long moan.  Before he could stop himself his hips jerked, searching for friction.  The movement jolted her from sleep and her eyes blinked open.  

“Steve?”

“Good morning,” he said weakly.  “I didn't mean to wake you.”  She smiled dreamily and stroked her hand over his chest.  

“I don't mind, this is better than any dream.”  She stretched herself to reach his lips and gave him a long lingering kiss.  “Don't get me wrong,” she began.  “Any dream you're in is great, but it doesn't compare to the real thing.”  

“Dreaming about me, Omega?”  His hand crept under the tank top she had put on to sleep in.  “What were we doing?”  Her skin was warm and smooth and a little shiver went down her spine from his touch.

“Several things,” her fingers teased down his belly.  “Which culminated with this inside of me,” she gripped him through his pants and he let out a surprised gasp.  “While I rode you.”  She clenched her thighs together and gave his erection a playful squeeze.  

“We c-could...oh fuck...reenact that if you'd like.”  She kissed up his neck and nibbled on his earlobe.

“I thought we were holding off on that while we were here until my heat comes, Alpha.”  He groaned and nodded.  He wanted to kick himself for suggesting that on the drive to the cabin.  They both agreed it would be best to let her body adjust and for her heat to begin before they had sex again.  And the temporary abstinence would make the mating a little more special in his mind.  He wasn't ashamed of their previous activities, but there were several good reasons to wait.  Even if he was finding it more and more difficult to remember what those reasons were.  

“You're right.”  He croaked.  He covered her hand with his when she didn't stop.  “The next time I make love to you I want to mate you.” She shook away his hold and pushed her hand into his pants.  

“Okay, glad you cleared that up.”  He yelped and tried to wriggle away, but she swung her leg over him and sat on his thighs.  

“I thought-”

“You said the next time we have sex, Steve.”  There was a wicked gleam in her eyes.  “I can take care of you without having sex with you.” Her head fell back and she inhaled deeply.  “I feel more like myself than I have in years.  It's like I can feel everything more clearly.  I can smell your scent and it's like smelling you for the first time.”  She looked down at him with a gently smile.  “But if you think this is stepping out of bounds I'll stop.  We can walk away from each other for a little while and go on with the rest of our day.”  She took his hand and held it to her cheek.  “This isn't just about me, I want this to be special for you too.”  She kissed his palm.  Steve chewed at the inside of his cheek and thought about it for a few moments.  

“I don't think I could bear it if you walked away from me right now, please just touch me.”  She started to pull down the waistband of his pants and then paused.  

“Are you sure?”  

“Anything but actual sex.  I gotta stand by something, right?”  He joked and she grinned.  “But please, just fucking touch me or I'll lose all conviction.”  He huffed out a laugh.  

“I've got you, Alpha.”  She cooed.  “Just lie back and let me take care of you.”  The two of them adjusted so she could maneuver his pants down his legs until he was fully naked.  His cock was red and leaking and he hissed in arousal when she skimmed her fingertips over it. “I'm kind of glad we're doing this,” she wrapped her hand around him and began to stroke him.  “I haven't had much of a chance to pleasure you before.  And who knows how much I'll be able to do when my heat fully hits.”  She swirled her thumb over the weeping head and he bucked up into her hand.  “You're so exquisitely beautiful, Steven.  And I don't mean just your body.”  If they weren't in their current position he would be protesting her praise, but she just kept stroking and touching and all he could do was take the pleasure and the praise.  “From day one, you've been exactly who I needed.  Falling in love with you was the best thing that's ever happened to me.”  

“Y/N,” He moaned.  “I...”  He wasn't sure what he was going to say.  

“I've got you,” she said again.  “I never thanked you for telling me about your past the other night.”  She leaned down and left little open mouthed kisses over his chest, licking and biting as she went. She sucked a small bruise on his collar bone before pulling back to meet his eyes.  His were glazed over with arousal, but she could tell she had his full attention.  “I love that we can be vulnerable with each other.  We can trust each other with our pasts.  I love you with all of my heart, Steve.”  Tears stung the backs of his eyes.  

“I love you too, Y/N.  My Omega.  My Soul Mate.”  She kissed him, rolling her tongue against his.  He let her take charge and submitted to her ministrations.  Maybe other Alphas would have fought back, but Steve didn't mind one bit. Her confidence was beautiful to him.  He knew how it felt to have her melt in his arms, and in his mind there was nothing wrong with letting her return the favor.  She sat back to catch her breath.  

“I want to taste you.”  She said and he let out a whine of approval. Wasting no time she moved down his body and closed her lips around the head of his cock, lapping at it with her tongue.  She sucked gently, but it still sent shock waves through him.  Her hands twisted along his shaft.  

“Oh, fuuuck.  That feels incredible,” he groaned.  “Please!  Massage my knot, please!”  She followed his request and her fingers kneaded the sensitive flesh at the base of his cock, where his knot would inflate when they mated.  It throbbed like a heartbeat and the way she massaged him had his eyes rolling back in his head.  “Omega,” he gasped.  “If you keep that up I'm gonna come.”  She paused long enough to lift her lips away from him.

“Do it.  Come for me, Alpha.  Give in to me.”  She sunk back down over his length and increased her speed and pressure.  He was lost when she moved one hand away from his knot and cupped his aching balls; and then flicked her tongue against the sensitive spot right below his head at the same time.  He came with a long strangled moan, spilling his seed into her mouth.  He heard the tearing sound of a sheet ripping in his fist, but he couldn't have cared less.  “That's it, god you're breathtaking when you come.”  She purred and continued to caress him through the aftershocks of his orgasm.  All he could do was lie there and pant with his heart racing.  

“Holy shit.”  He gasped.  “I really hope that wasn't a one time thing.” Y/N chuckled and rocked her hips against his thigh.  

“Oh darling, that turned me on almost as much as it did you.”  She leaned down and kissed the side of his neck.  “I'm wetter than I've ever been before in my life.  I think it's safe to say my heat is coming very quickly.”  

Next

[erlangs]

kpop recs

okaaay so i was bored and wanted to procrastinate so i thought why not??? keep in mind that this list isn’t exhaustive and there are probably more recs out there but here are just some of my favorites + why i would rec them!! a lot of the recs are on the popular side of things too but i also tried putting in groups that not everyone know of / listen to already ( i put the more popular groups down the bottom btw ).

day6: day6!!!! day6!!! i got into them like over a year after their debut lmao so i was a lil late but damn am i glad that i started listening to them?? they’re more krock than kpop probably but honestly....pls listen to day6.... a lot of people have been saying that some of their songs feel like anime intros too and i would agree?? like some of their songs would fit v v well into shonen anime intros tbh esp probs like sports anime? ANYWAY, they have a variety of songs like they have different sounds for some of their things but i think they still have a v distinctive day6 feel it’s just a matter of preference which sort of sound you like better? honestly, i would rec all their songs but i think for the purpose of this list my rec for them would be letting go (놓아 놓아 놓아). even without context the music video feels so Raw and Deep too imo but...with context lmao they left a keyboard untouched whenever there are scenes of them playing as a band and that’s bc one of their members left and that always makes me emotional. also, congratulations was their debut and you were beautiful is a continuation of that mv wise which i think is cool af. personal rec though? both tracks from the every day6 march ( how can i say is the title track for that one ). 

dreamcatcher: ok so as i write this they’ve only debuted like a couple of months ago but goddamn i love their concept. here’s a fun fact: they debuted on friday the 13th with a song and mv bearing a horror concept which is??? sick af??? their debut mv chase me basically is about the girls as ghosts haunting this place and it is SO COOL. ofc tho, trigger warning for horror!! i believe that the mv is part of the trilogy, and here is the second part of it called good night. the chase me mv i think is the BEST but i really really love good night as a song too. also !! they have rock sounds which is really cool!! ( also, pls listen to yoohyeon, sua and siyeon covering winner’s really really. )

laboum: MY GIRLS WHO DESERVE SO MUCH. i....honestly don’t even know what to rec for this list just bc i like everything they’ve done?? some i do like more than others though, but i think it also kind of depends on your taste and what you like?? if you like kinda like that cute concept then i would def recommend shooting love?? honestly, i myself am kind of like...picky about cute ish concepts just bc a lot of them seem to blur together but i really like shooting love?? it’s such a fun mv and is such a bop. if you’re here for something slower, though, give fresh adventure a listen. and pls support their latest mv ( as i write this ) hwi hwi which is such a catchy song i’m crying.

loona: they’re doing this thing where they’re releasing info about a member every month this year and they’re letting their members come up with a debut song and mv one by one until all their members are out to public. i think it’s a really cool concept too and they seem really really promising. i would recommend watching each of their individual debut mvs ( hyunjin’s around you is my favorite, but watch them all tbh ) and i still can’t get over how much i love their mv ( not featuring all their members tho as not everyone is “released” yet ) love & live.

pentagon: i....love them??? HONESTLY i have no idea what it is about them that makes me love them so much?? sometimes i’m like pls @ them but i really love them and i think their debut was really Solid too?? it’s an mv called gorilla and it just....really impressed me for a debut mv?? their second title track is called can you feel it and they also they have a super cute mv called pretty pretty lmaooo. in their second ep though ( five senses, with can you feel it as title track ) i really like the song engine!! if you like slower and chiller songs, give beautiful a listen too. the mv isn’t like a Spectacular concept or anything but i just love these boys and how much of cute losers they are.

kard: as i’m writing this they have currently not yet debuted but !! they released three project singles that are all such BOPS HONESTLY. kard is a coed kpop group with some really cool sounds. i’m just gonna list all three project singles here because i def think you should listen to all of them esp bc they’re kind of a trilogy song wise?? their first one is oh nana, followed by don’t recall ( a personal fave ) and their most recent one is called rumor. there are v interesting fan theories about the mvs too, especially for don’t recall.

triple h: they’re a project unit featuring hyuna and pentagon’s hui & e’dawn and their debut is!! really something!! their debut mv is called 365 fresh and holy fuuuck. trigger warning for blood, bruises, violence, murder and suicide, though, so please keep that in mind if you plan on watching. if not, the song in itself is such a Fresh song. i love the entire vibe of their entire 199x ep too.

vixx: kings of dance and vocals, ngl. i swear that they just get better and better and better and every time they have a comeback ever since like chained up they just get even fucking better somehow??? fantasy i really really love too and for the longest time it was my favorite song of theirs but then they recently dropped shangri la which is honestly....quite Something Else. i have admittedly not listened to many of their non title tracks either but i really like black out!!

f(x): i’ll be honest and say that i haven’t really listened to much of f(x) other than their 4 walls era but i love that era?? i love the mv to 4 walls too and i would 10/10 rec it. though honestly pls give the entire album a listen and personally, my favorite song from the album is deja vu.

blackpink: goddamn these girls got popular real quick. honestly one of my fave girl groups though I LOVE THEM SO MUCH and though boombayah i think is officially their debut mv whistle is honestly such a bop and also has a bomb ass music video?? their other two mvs playing with fire and stay are also sick af i just really love them. they got the #aesthetic.

seventeen: i’m just gonna keep this short bc i don’t think i know nearly enough about svt just yet but mansae is suuuch a fun mv imo as a whole group that’s their best mv just because it was really fun?? the song is super catchy too. but give their hip hop unit’s check in a listen too bc it’s Iconic tbh.

bts: they honestly deserve the hype they get?? so much?? you’ve most likely already heard about them but if you’re not into them yet or have yet to listen to a song and don’t know where to start my number one rec is blood, sweat and tears — which is also what got me into them — ( and here’s the japanese ver but keep in mind there are triggers for blood, murder & allusions to drugs, i like to think that the japanese ver is an alternate universe/continuation of the korean one and there are lots of theories on this that you can read up ). althouuugh bst especially the mv would set your standards very high i think?? but honestly....that’s a Must Watch if ur getting into bts. i know that it’s already v popular but it really really deserves the attention it gets imo. BUT the entire wings era is worth listening to and also pls listen to all their solos in the wings album ( my personal favorite is rap monster’s reflection ).

red velvet: probably another name that pops up a lot too and they have a really interesting concept tbh?? they have like this duality where red is like a more playful and fun concept and velvet is more classy and elegant in a way?? dumb dumb is a really fun example of the red concept and be natural for velvet!! russian roulette seems like a hit or miss for people too but i think the song is really cute!!

exo: again, who hasn’t heard of them?? monster was a Hit and deservingly so too. i honestly really really love the entire lotto / ex’act album too and i especially really like can’t bring me down from the album. but honestly, as much as how big of a hit monster ( and some of their other mvs like overdose and call me baby, amongst many others are huge hits too ) was, i think my favorite mv they did was sing for you. boy that made me feel things?? many fans speculate that the mv was kind of a tribute to kris, luhan and tao ( three members who left ) too and that made me even more !!! about it. ALSO ALSO they have a sub unit called exo cbx and i just rec everything cbx does tbh but before they became an official sub unit they did this song as an ost for a kdrama and i LOVE it so much it’s called for you.

got7: another really popular group so imma try not talk too much about them but honestly...i think just right is p much an insight into got7′s personality LMAO aka adorable losers. everyone loves all three of their flight log trilogy eras too but my favorite is the flight log: turbulence era. hard carry is a masterpiece that i keep on coming back to and skyway is my other favorite song on the album, followed by boom x3.

bigbang: i’m not even gonna get into this one because chances are you’ve heard fantastic baby or bang bang bang. listen to anything in their made album, basically. but i’m just gonna leave last dance here it was a Masterpiece.

2ne1: a disbanded group, which is really sad lmao. you’ve probably heard i am the best too but i just wanna rec come back home and falling in love. 2ne1 was what got me into kpop in the first place too and i love them.

soloists: i’m too lazy to link all the mvs and all but look into seo inguk, kim chungha, lim kim, ailee, lee hi, park jimin ( of 15& ), amber liu, kisum, dean, heize and i’m probably missing a lot of people.

[punishercoded]

“Adventures in Undertale” Frisk had just fallen down and was in the process of getting up, and looked around in slight boredom. They had seen all this before and were ready to do it all again. Finally raising from the golden petals they started walking,“Time to do this all again.” Frisk said as they started to go to Flowey. Frisk was going to the next room when suddenly a green portal appeared above their brown haired head, two people soon falling on top of them, shooting guns into the portal. Frisk fell as a boy and man collapsed onto them. Their hp decreased dramatically from the impact due to the combined weight of the people, causing the vibrant red soul of themselves to break into multiple pieces. Frisk’s last thoughts before the darkness consumed them was simply,“That’s new…” as they fell into the dark abyss. “G-God dammit Morty!” The older man with blue hair yelled as he drank from a silver flask,“Do you realize what the fuck you just did?!” “M-Me?! You did it! You shot the portal! I d-didn’t do anything, Rick!” The brown haired fourteen-year-old looking boy studdered towards Rick. Rick rolled his eyes and mumbled, “At least I don’t bitch about everything, you little shit.” Rick then decided to look around and noticed the cave walls and the flowers on the ground,“Oh Fuuuck Morty! Do you know where we are?! This is baaaaad Morty! Y-You fucked up biiig time!” Rick mumbled drunkenly as he stumbled to begin the process of hiding the body of the departed Frisk, pausing every once in a while to drink from his flask. “W-What do you mean Rick? Where a-are we?!” Morty yelled gripping what little brown hair he had on his head. He was genuinely confused and was really close to possibly shitting his pants again. “W-We’re in Undertale M-M-Morty! And you just killed the main character!” Rick studdered and belched, throwing the body into a corner of the room. “I-I-I didn’t kill nobody! Besides… i-i-isn’t Undertale a video game or something? H-How are we in a video game?!” Morty was looking around wondering what the hell Rick dragged him into this time. Rick looked at Morty with a look of pure annoyment in his beady eyes,“Multiple Realities MOoOorty, including one where video games are actual places.” Morty’s head tilted,“Why would you pick this dimension to hide in Rick? S-Seems like a bad place h-h-hide.” He honestly didn’t really understand this at all, why out of all places to hide from their enemies… “Because MoOoOorty, it happened. The writer of the story we are in decided to put us here.” Rick burped and drank his flask some more. He threw Frisk behind a rock in the very dark depths of the room, their body already seems to show signs of decay,“Alright M-Morty, we have to get the hell out of here. L-Let’s fucking gOoooO! "Wait R-Rick! What do you mean story?! And where d-d-do we go?!” Morty studdered and yelled. “Shut the f-fuck up Morty, your being reaLly annoying. Just calm down and go check t-this place out for cool shit, the fAaaLl broke my portal gun and I n-need to fix it before the counsel of fucking idiots shows up.” Rick pulled out some glowing crystals and a screwdriver then took a seat on the pile of flowers beneath the opening of the hole. Morty looked around nervously,“O-Ok Rick, I’ll see what I c-can find."He then proceeded to look around the room, not seeing anything of interest or desire,"Maybe there is something in the next r-room.” Morty spoke seemly to no one. “Then go check it oOUtt then and stop being weird MoOorty.” Rick mumbled,“I w-want this damn story over with so this fUucking writer will stop telling everyone e-every damn detail of our lives.” Morty walked into the next room and glanced around again, the room was all pitch black except for a spotlight-like thing showing a small green grass circle. He stepped closer to the circle and suddenly a small golden innocent face appeared seemly from nowhere,“H-Holy shit! w-w-what the hell is that?!” Morty screamed slightly, already regretting coming out of the room he and Rick fell into. “Howdy! I’m Flowey, Flowey the Flower!” Flowey Observed the smallest boy and was perplexed, this was obviously not Frisk. So what was this child doing here?,“You must be soooo confused!” “You c-can say that again…” Morty spoke to himself, wondering how he could get away from this creepy ass flower. He tried stepping away before realizing he seemed to be in a white battle box. Looking in front of himself Morty saw a gray dull looking soul in front of him. Flowey giggled at how wimpy this boy must be all the time, it was glorious. Morty, on the other hand, was even more terrified,“W-What the hell is this?! L-L-Let me out!” Flowey smiled,“See that heart? That’s your soul! the very cumulation of your being! Your soul starts off weak, but can become stronger will more LV!” Morty studders grew worse from fear,“W-W-What do y-you mean LV? Wh-What’s that?” “Why LV stands for LOVE of course! You want some love don’t you?” Morty shook his head,“Actually n-no thanks, I’ll j-just go now!” Morty tried to get away before becoming surrounded by little white pellets,“W-What the hell?! HEY! LET ME OUT!” Flowey giggled,“Nah, you’re much more fun than Frisk ever was!” He laughed with menace before sending the pellets closer and closer to a trembling Morty. “RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK! HEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLP!” The pellets grew and closer towards Morty, Morty himself assuming that Rick didn’t hear him or didn’t give a shit, the latter most likely being the answer. Morty didn’t think being killed by a video game character would be how he died, an alien or shoot out yeah. But a fake yet real game flower? Not really a memorable way to go. He curled up into a ball on the ground, waiting for his death. Time seems to go by in slow motion before the devil of a flower froze. Not in fear or surprise, but in actual ice. Morty glanced up to see his grandfather holding a freeze ray towards Flowey with a look of disgust on his face,“JesUuUs Morty, you were gonna let yourself d-die by a flower? That’s fucking pathetic.” Morty ignored Rick’s insult and ran up to him throwing his arms around the older man,“T-Thank you grandpa Rick! Thank you!” Rick was nervous at first from the interaction but slowly hugged his grandson back,“SuUure Morty, your mom would have murdered me if you died so once again, hAad to s-save your ass. Now c-come on, let’s go home b-buddy.” Rick grumbled pulling Morty away to the wall. He shot a green portal onto the surface of the wall not too far away from the now frozen Flowey. Rick took some pellets into a vial,“Might be useful for something.” and proceeded to pull Morty into the portal, it soon closing afterwards. Not too long after this whole ordeal, Frisk finally loaded their save. Looking around once again at the golden flowers and the doorway to the next room they wondered,“What in the underground was that about?”

UNTIL NEXT TIME, WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!