#i was at a funeral this weekend i thought i was gonna be next | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alchemistc · 6 months ago

Text

goon | bucktommy | chapter two

check out the hockey glossary here (updated for chapter two) Prologue | Chapter One

Chapter Two

“That’s a very nice suit,” Josh says instead, phone between two fingers and tap-tap-tapping against his palm. “Also I need you and Buck to do an interview for me when we get into Utah.” Tommy and Eddie both shoot him looks, although Eddie’s is significantly less polite than Tommy’s. “Why.” He doesn’t really frame it as a question, but as they approach the stairs leading up to the plane Josh continues his backward walk, seemingly uncaring of the significant difference in their heights as he keeps pace. “Yeah, you haven’t won a face-off in a year and a half —” “I haven’t taken a face-off in a year and a half,” Tommy amends, but Russo either isn’t listening or doesn’t particularly care about the details.

When Tommy was eleven, three important things happened.

The first — the most important one, had been the birth of his younger sister. He’d spent the months leading up to it pressing his ear to his mothers growing belly, giddy with possibility, talking to her for hours and hours while his mom got pale and tired. He’d been eleven, though, and she’d done everything she could to hide that from him, always happy to wrap him up in her arms when he got home from school, always ready to throw on her game face when Tommy sat on the bed at her hip with one hand pressed to the bump as he told the baby all the cool things he’d learned at school that day, and the games they’d played during recess, and the thing Robert Duncan had said that had made Tommy laugh so hard his teacher had sent him off to the principals office for disruptive behavior.

The second had been the day his mom took him to the mall and bought him a pair of rollerblades — black leather with neon green wheels, even cooler than the ones Chris Harper had gotten for his birthday. He’d spent a month eating shit up and down the cul de sac until he was steady on his feet, and then the next six months spending every weekend with all the rest of the kids in the neighborhood, two nets set up at he end of Cherry Avenue, two streets down from Tommy’s house, borrowing Judy Green’s older brothers retired equipment, setting up pick up games and driving the whole neighborhood a bit mad as they all taught each other whatever arbitrary hockey rule they’d learned watching the latest Devil’s game before their parents sent them off to bed.

And then, at the peak of it all, the day after baby Abigail had been born, Tommy’s dad didn’t come home from the hospital with her or Tommy’s mom. In fact, he barely came home at all, other than to let him know his aunt would be by in a few hours to pick him up, and then he’d been gone again.

The third, as he’d found out six hours later, anxious and fretful in the passenger seat of Aunt Stacy’s station wagon, was his mom dying.

Eleven, and a week later he’d donned his first suit and tie, feeling sad and tired and worn and grown up, peeking over his aunts shoulder at the bundle of wrinkly baby in her arms. His dad had shown up to the funeral late, drunk, and angry, and Tommy — in his infinite wisdom, six days into a world without a mom — had tried to comfort him.

Eleven, and he’d gotten his first black eye to match his first black suit.

Tommy hasn’t worn a black suit since.

Diaz catches him halfway across the tarmac, fingers reaching out to pinch at the collar of Tommy’s burgundy plaid jacket. “Snazzy,” he says, tugging, wheeling his bag behind him and matching Tommy stride for stride, which Tommy finds a little strange until he remembers that Diaz has been keeping up with Buckley’s gazelle-legged pace for going on six years now. “And here we all thought you were gonna rock the henley-jeans combo until coach called you out in a team meeting.”

“I’m not a caveman,” Tommy rebuts, shaking his head to hide the grin. “But I do have to get all my suit jackets altered before I wear them. Not all of us have trim little waists and a forgiving shoulder line.”

Eddie pauses just long enough to twist his wrists and point two fingers at himself, grin a little wide. “Hey, if Buck tries to hand you one of his little cakes, just, like, take it and pretend you’ll try it,” he says, darting a glance behind him, no doubt looking to make sure the coast is clear. Tommy shoots him an amused look.

“What’s wrong with the cake?”

“He’s been trying to crack a gluten free dairy free cupcake. They’re... he hasn’t cracked it.”

Tommy bites his lip, rolls his tongue alongside the inside of his cheek, nearly runs into Josh Russo as he shoots his own look back to try to find Buckley’s mile-long legs amidst the group trailing along behind them towards the team jet.

When he reaches out to steady Russo, the man gives him the bitchiest fucking look Tommy’s ever seen, and completely ignores Diaz, walking backwards and turning his phone screen. “It’s fine, your profile in this lighting is gonna make people absolutely feral.”

It’s a good picture. Tommy doesn’t exactly have too many hang-ups about his appearance, but he used to, and this one is getting all his best angles. He holds up a fist for Josh to bump, and Josh stares at it for a moment like Tommy’s presenting him with roadkill.

He can’t decide whether or not Josh has clocked him, yet. There’s been a few instances where he’s tilted his head a certain way, or made an off-hand comment at the end of practice while he’s mining for content, that makes Tommy wonder if he’s seeing behind all the machismo to his soft underbelly and recognizing something of himself.

“You send me a single screenshot of someone on any social media getting thirsty and I’m shaving my head,” Tommy warns, just to watch Russo’s face flicker through all the stages of grief in about five seconds flat.

Tommy won’t ever admit this, but he’s never seen anyone crack social media interactions like a gay man in a toxic cesspool of a sport, and Josh Russo knows his shit. How often to post his stupid little thirst traps, what sort of questions to ask them when they’re sweaty and tired and ready for a fucking shower, which matchups the fans are most looking forward to, when to leak not-quite-secret shit to give fans a glimpse into the humanity of everyone’s favorite recalcitrant player.

“That’s a very nice suit,” Josh says instead, phone between two fingers and tap-tap-tapping against his palm. “Also I need you and Buck to do an interview for me when we get into Utah.”

Tommy and Eddie both shoot him looks, although Eddie’s is significantly less polite than Tommy’s. “Why.” He doesn’t really frame it as a question, but as they approach the stairs leading up to the plane Josh continues his backward walk, seemingly uncaring of the significant difference in their heights as he keeps pace.

“Yeah, you haven’t won a face-off in a year and a half —”

“I haven’t taken a face-off in a year and a half,” Tommy amends, but Russo either isn’t listening or doesn’t particularly care about the details.

“—and the first one you took as an Av resulted in a brilliantly stellar wrister from our star defenseman through, like, six men in front of the net —”

“Four bodies tops,” Tommy continues, even though at this point he’d be better just accepting that he’s going to be talked over.

“—and with the fight, too, the fans are abuzz, so I’m taking the initiative to lean into some new dynamics —”

“You’re pimping me out because I look good with blood on my knuckles.”

Russo pauses. Takes a deep breath. “Yeah, it was more the absolutely manic smile on your face all the way to the box, that people were talking about. On that topic, how do you still have all your teeth?”

Tommy considers popping out his partials to show Josh exactly how many teeth he’s actually missing, but then Josh will make a face, and Diaz will feel the need to antagonize him, just a little bit, and Tommy would really like to settle in his seat and decompress. He ignores the question entirely. “Can we do it tomorrow morning?”

Russo tilts his head back and forth, considering. He eyes the cut Hen’d taped up after todays afternoon game like he’s trying to decide if he can makeup it away before he remembers that that’s sort of the draw to late season hockey players cropping up for dumb social media shit. “I’ll ask Buck,” he commits, and Tommy sneaks past him up the stairs before he can wheedle any more favors off of him.

Inside the cabin, the broadcast crew is already settled in to their seats, and he takes a few spare moments to say hello. It doesn’t do shit, really, except show respect, but he’s been around the block enough times that acknowledging the staff of any given organization has become habit.

By the time he finds a seat, the rest of the team has already boarded, and Tommy settles in next to Panikkar, who looks about ready to pass out. He’d done half an hour on the bikes after the game while Tommy iced the bruise he’d gotten courtesy the crosscheck he'd received from Eberle while they battled in the corner for the puck.

Tommy pulls out his phone to find a new message waiting for him.

Nash says you’re sticking around, the message from Sal reads, and Tommy opens up the thread to take a look at the last few messages from one of his oldest teammates.

It’s a short turnaround of a travel day, Sunday afternoon game just finished and a quick flight into Salt Lake where they’ll pass out at the hotel (Buckley and Russo willing, anyway) and then be up with enough time for an early morning practice, lunch and a nap before they head to the arena. Tommy is realizing he’s hemmed himself in to a 5 am wakeup at the latest, if Josh is actually serious about mining Tommy’s temporary fame for content.

In the seat next to him, Panikkar mumbles something, already fully asleep in the time it had taken Tommy to fasten his seatbelt and scroll up to Sal’s last few messages, and Ravi’s head is already drifting toward Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy rolls his eyes, but he still ends up shifting his weight to allow for easier landing, when the inevitable trajectory of Ravi’s slumping skull meets its destination.

A year ago, Sal had sent him a random screenshot of the infamous Seguin tweet and a link to an Oliver Peck music video, and then, three weeks ago when the news of the trade broke: See you in a few weeks

Tommy’d replied with a selfie of himself holding up a middle finger, but at the time he’d been pretty sure Sal was right. That was typically what happened — Tommy was used to being the weight that shifted midseason when contenders wanted to make a big move and didn’t have the cap space to do it. It was early — early enough that most trades were still a glimmer in the eye of most agents, the All-Star break still looming, the perfect time to make a move that didn’t mean much, in the scheme of things.

Only that hadn’t happened. The Avs were undoubtedly the team to beat in the conference this year, so he’d expected maybe a week or two up and down the lineup before they shifted him off to Loveland, only playing up if someone was injured. He was a shit defenseman but he knew enough to move from his typical forward position, and he was used to that steady grind, easy to slot in if they needed to reassess an early season injury in the ramp up to playoffs.

And he was hanging it up at the end of the year, anyway, and the foothills of Colorado were a hell of a lot nicer than —

Not the point.

Only.

That hadn’t happened. Instead he’d hopped the first flight out and found a car waiting for him at the airport to take him directly to the arena. It’d been an off day, two days in to a three day stretch of them, actually, so even the team rumored to have one of the most strenuous practice schedules in the league was off that day, when he’d been escorted through the building and straight up to the GM’s office.

Sorry, Tommy shoots off, as the plane starts to taxi. I know you were looking forward to checking out my tits in the locker room, Deluca.

Ravi’s head finally touches down against the meat of Tommy’s shoulder, and he snuffles sneepily before nosing in, a bit. Tommy wishes he’d thought to grab one of the shitty pillows from the overhead bin: Panikkar’s cheeks are sharp.

Just the left one, Sal shoots back. Keep an eye out for 27, he’s had it out for Diaz since ‘21.

Tommy is aware of this. Perhaps a little more incidentally than he knows some of the conflicts Buckley has gotten himself wrapped up in, but he’s done the research on all the little shits on this team who like to chirp and then get their asses handed to them.

He closes out of the thread in time to catch liftoff, and an up close and personal serenade of light snores from the man who has, in three weeks, gone from passive aggressively mentioning all the routines he has in place to work on his speed to being comfortable enough with him to fall asleep on his shoulder.

Two rows up, Cameron has his overhead light tilted over his latest trashy pulp fiction novel, and up another three, Greenway is sulking. He’s been on the outs for weeks, now, and Tommy doesn’t know the exact details, only that he’d thrown a quiet little fit over Tommy’s sustained minutes (all seven a game) and that Chim hates him.

Quietly, Tommy suspects that he’s the piece the front office is trying to move out before the trade deadline, but he hasn’t said a word of it yet. Better to keep his mouth shut and his head down until he’s got better feel for the dynamics. And Christ are there a lot of dynamics on this team.

In the row next to him, Diaz and Buckley have their heads bent over an iPad, one earbud each and their eyes flitting across the screen with an almost disturbing synchrony — two halves of a whole, those two. He likes them both, and not even just because they are a large part of the reason he’s getting enough ice time to justify keeping him on the bench.

Tommy’s caught staring when Buckley flicks his gaze up and over, and there’s a moment where Tommy holds his breath, just like always — twenty-year career and no teammate has ever questioned why he doesn’t have a girlfriend, a bleach blonde wife popping out kids, he’s not about to lose that streak now over an intriguing birthmark and a megawatt grin.

Buck smiles, tilts his head a little, returns to his screen. They have multiple iPads, but these two are practically attached at the hip, and he’s yet to see them reach for a second one when they could just tilt their heads together over game film and discover some weakness they can exploit that even Karen Wilson hasn’t discovered yet.

Tommy, like an idiot, doesn’t look away. He’s got a snoring Ravi nuzzling into his shoulder and he’s still nursing the bruise on his thigh, too wired to sleep and too tired to realize how long he’s been looking at the side of Buckley’s skull until Buckley is saying something softly, and Tommy watches Diaz knock their shoulders together. Too late, he realizes Eddie is shifting, turning his head — he catches Tommy’s gaze with a raised brow.

Tommy feels caught out, but Eddie just tips his chin at Ravi wheezing against his shoulder, grin going wide.

He makes an aborted half-shrug of a movement, reeling it back halfway through so as not to jostle Ravi, and misses the moment Buck turns his camera on the tableau.

Behind Tommy, Chim is in the middle of one of his batty post-game cooldown routines, and he can hear the faint sounds of whatever ballad he’s currently listening to — Celine Dion, maybe? The air is on, and Tommy’s skin feels tight, and the ambient noise is doing nothing to help the squeal of tinnitus he’d never fully lost after his last fight with Deslauriers. He chokes down the urge to reach over and snatch the phone right out of Buckley’s hand — cheeses it up instead, knowing Buck’s snapped probably twenty pictures already.

He can’t prove it, but he’s absolutely certain there are pain inhibitors in Evan Buckley’s smile. When he lowers his phone and grins bashfully, the bruise on Tommy’s thigh fees a little less achy, and the buzzing behind his ears fades enough that Tommy barely notices it.

When Buck turns away again, Tommy makes a concentrated effort to focus on the pattern of the seat in front of him.

He doesn’t grin at all when his phone lights up with four notifications in row: Buck’s curated glamour shots of Ravi drooling on Tommy’s shoulder.

---

"You're good at those," Buckley says, skidding to a halt next to him at the elevators, and Tommy tips his head side to side, twists his neck just enough to catch his profile in his peripherals.

"Twenty years in the league," he intones, trying hard not to smile at how fucking antsy this kid is, shifting foot to foot as they wait for the doors to slide open.

"No, yeah, I just mean --" Buck shifts his weight, tips his chin. "You've got, like, personality and shit, in those. I always feel like a robot trying to figure out genuine human emotions when Josh asks me to do that stuff. But it -- I mean it was nice, to just... You made it easy, is all I'm trying to say."

"You didn't seem remotely like a robot, to me," Tommy teases, watching the numbers above the elevator doors drop. He's a little startled when Buckley smacks at his shoulder, but by the time he's had the chance to do more than blink about it Buck's already moving on.

"It's like you weren't even listening to me, I just said you helped me not be."

"I mean, if you did, it was very subtley implied, actually, so you can't blame me for the misinterpretation."

At his side, Buckley glances up at the numbers, too. "Do you want to grab coffee? I feel like we should grab coffee."

"Aren't you vehemently against caffeine on game days?"

Buckley looks both pleased he'd remembered, and a little bashful, which Tommy can't parse for a minute. "Everyone has cheat days. Besides, it's just Utah."

"Famous last words," Tommy warns, but he's already turning back in the direction of the conference room they'd just left, towards the Starbucks he's pretty sure is on this level. He checks his watch - if they mosey, maybe the place will even be open by the time they get there.

Buckley falls into step beside him and without missing a beat continues the conversation. "Sounds like there's a story to that."

Tommy can see him working through the math in his head. Kid's like a Roledex for NHL facts and stats, so it doesn't take him long to divide by two and get to the conclusion that they'd been playing Philadelphia at the tail end of their worst season on record.

"First full season in the league my team went on a tear. I'm talking barnburners every other night, fifteen home game wins straight — real mensch shit. We were on top of the world. But... season’s winding down, you know, and we didn't start out great, so we're chasing every point we can just to scrape a spot in round one." Buckley's eyes are sparkling the exact same way they'd been, all through Josh's weird word association game he'd had them do for warmups before actually getting into his little question and answer session. "And me — I'm playing fifteen minutes a game against guys like Sid and Ovi, I'm one hundred percent sure this streak is never gonna end. So - two games left in the season, we're scheduled to play the Flyers."

"Coach pulls us in for a huddle before pregame warmups and he tells us to keep our heads down, shoot for the net, get back to basics, don't underestimate them. But half their team are call-ups, at that point, a good third have never played at this level before, right?"

Buck chuckles, clearly already reaching the conclusion, but Tommy forges on ahead anyway.

"So I just say it. Come right out and say the words: Coach, it's just Philly." He gestures wide, hands out in front of him, like he can conjure up the words that had been painted onto the inside of his eyelids for a good four months, after.

"So what happened?"

"We got shut out. Five nothing. By their third string goalie. Guy’d never even been on the bench as a backup before, and he stood on his damn head all game.”

Buck laughs. It’s a sweet sound, echoing off the walls of the corridor they're strolling through, and Tommy feels the edges of his grin going wide, digging crevices into his cheeks as he shakes his head at the memory. They’d scraped the two-seed that year, and gotten slaughtered in the second round, and Tommy had spent the entire summer hearing it’s just Philly parroted back to him by every single member of his team.

“Eddie doesn’t believe in curses,” Buck admits, once his laughter has died down. “He’s the least superstitious person I know.”

“Hope he doesn’t get voted into the All-Star game, then. Sid might read him the riot act.”

Buckley stops dead in his tracks, eyebrows both dancing up his forehead. It brings his birthmark into stark relief against the shitty lighting of the corridor. He shakes his head like he’s clearing a thought. “I forgot you played with him.”

Tommy has to remind himself that Buckley probably knows every team all of his teammates, current and former, have ever played for. “For a year and a half, back when the jock strap was still mostly white.”

Buck grins, again, blue eyes gleaming as he twists himself sideways, sort of grape-vining down the hall for a few moments, body facing Tommy’s. “What’s he like to play with?” he asks, and Tommy barrels on ahead, desperately reminding himself that Evan Buckley is exactly like every other long-legged, bright-eyed, shockingly sweet attractive man he’s ever played with.

Off-fucking-limits.

#bucktommy #bucktommy hockey au #bucktommy fic #tevan fic #guys they INTERACT IN THIS ONE FINALLY

58 notes · View notes

mymoodwriting · 11 months ago

Text

Request for Anon (Yandere Demon Chanhee) 4.2k, yandere, supernatural, demons, soul contract, possessiveness, manipulation, kidnapping, magic (@starillusion13)

“You called?”

You and your sorority girls screamed, immediately moving away from the strange guy that had suddenly made his presence known. You were all in one of the bedrooms, having a little sleep over and playing games. Of course the others decided to try some darker things, turning off the lights and getting some candles, chanting weird things. You didn’t participate in any of this but now there was a stranger in the room. He chuckled at your reactions, looking around the room while remaining in the shadows.

“You summoned a demon.” He stated. “Did you think I wouldn’t show?”

“You… you’re a demon…” Sal stuttered. “Like… for real…”

“As real as it gets. So, what is it that you want?”

“Wait, so you’ll grant our wish?” Yaz asked. “Anything we want?”

“For the right price of course.”

A flame apparead from the palm of his hand, leaving behind a scroll when it disappeared. He unrolled the thing, holding out a contract and his hand, baring his claws.

“A wish, in exchange for a soul.”

“We sign with blood?” You questioned.

“Of course. So, who shall pay?”

You didn’t like any of this, but before you could voice your concerns your friends grabbed you and pulled you forward. You cut your arm on the demon’s claws, bits of your blood splattering onto the contract. Your eyes went wide, and when you looked at the demon you could see a satisfied grin on his face. You were still processing when your friends pulled you back.

“I want to get into my dream job!” Sal exclaimed.

“And I want to get my inheritance early!” Yaz added.

“And you?”

“Please leave…” You breathed out. “Now…”

“Of course.”

The candles went out, plunging the room into darkness. Then you gasped awake in bed. You looked around in a panic, able to confirm you were in your room and calming down. Last night lingered in your mind, but it all felt like a dream. You quickly checked your arm, and to your relief there weren’t any marks. It really was just a weird dream. You took a moment to compose yourself and then got out of bed, getting ready for the day. As you went downstairs you greeted your sorority sisters, wanting to grab something from the kitchen before going to class. When you heard screaming coming from that direction you rushed over, but you merely jumped to conclusions. You found Sal and Yaz cheerfully yelling and jumping about.

“I got in! I got in!” Sal chanted. “I got accepted as an intern at my dream job! I’m gonna get to work there!!!”

“Yas! I’m so proud of you1”

“I’m so excited! I start tomorrow.”

“I’ve got good news too!”

“For real? What is it?”

“I woke up to a very important call this morning. My mother told me that my grandfather passed away last night.”

“Oh my gosh, Yaz, I’m so sorry.”

“I know. I’ll be going home this weekend for the funeral, but you know what else this means?”

“What?”

“They’re gonna read the will.”

“Wait, you’re gonna get your inheritance? Aren’t you?”

“Yes.”

“Yaz! You’re gonna be rich!”

“Right!”

The two started screaming again and you decided you’d skip breakfast today. You made your way out of the sorority house, heading to your first class of the day. You were kinda lost in thought over what you had seen. Last night was a dream, but it was such a coincidence that Yaz and Sal both got what they had wished for the next morning. You had to remind yourself that demons and all that stuff isn’t real.

“Morning, did you sleep well?”

Some random guy pulled you out of your thoughts, trying to initiate a conversation with you. Of course you ignored him, not wanting to give a weirdo like him attention. You walked right past him but he was soon to follow and get in your way.

“Don’t you think you’re being rude?”

“Do I know you?”

“You don’t remember?”

“Can you just leave me alone?”

“Nope, you’re mine now.”

“Excuse me!”

The boy gave you a big smile, baring his sharp teeth, his eyes turning black. You inhaled sharply and took a step back. Fire emanated from his hand and he held up a contract with blood on it, showing it to you.

“Last night wasn’t a dream.”

“You… you… you can’t…”

“I’m very real.” His eyes returned to normal, and the contract went up in flames. “So, have you thought about your wish?”

“My wish?”

“Yes, you signed the contract after all.”

“You granted Sal and Yaz’s wish.”

“I did no such thing.” He chuckled. “It’s just a coincidence, but between you and me, this weekend is gonna be very fun.”

“What are you talking about?”

“That girl won’t make it to the end of the week at her internship, and the other, she’s gonna be very upset when she finds out grandpa left her a penny.”

“You’re lying.”

“Just wait and see, but back to you. What is it that you desire?”

“For you to leave me alone.”

“Ouch. Like I said, I can’t do that. Your soul, your very being, is mine now, and I take care of my things.”

The boy stepped closer, brushing his fingers along your cheek before you slapped his hand away. He chuckled but stayed put.

“The name is Chanhee by the way.”

“And you’re a demon?”

“In the flesh.”

“What if I don’t wish for anything?”

“That’s your loss. In ten years I’m taking your soul, regardless of where you’re at in life.”

“Then I wish to keep my soul.”

“Sorry, you already signed a contract, and you can’t wish to undo it.”

“I didn’t do it willingly!”

“Your blood sealed the deal, all that’s left is for you to make a wish.”

“How do I break it then? Everything has rules, so there must be a way.”

“I’m afraid there isn’t. You can’t wish for anything that would break the contract, and you can only wish for things that would directly affect you.”

“Then I wish you never existed.”

“You wound me, but like I said, you can’t wish for anything that would break the contract. You’re stuck with me.”

“I hate you.”

“Well you have to get to know me first. Now that we have eternity together we-”

“Eternity?”

“Yup.”

“So… what happens when I die?”

“I take your soul.”

“But what happens… to me…”

“You’re mine, so I can do whatever I want. I can blink you out of existence and use your soul for power, or… you could roam the Earth with me as my companion.”

“So I am stuck with you.”

“Forever.”

“I’m gonna kill those girls.”

“Oh, do you wish to get away with murder?”

“Fuck off.”

You shoved Chanhee aside, not wanting to think about any of this and focus on something else. For now you were just a normal student with nothing supernatural going on. You had some time between your first class and the next so you went to the library, wanting to go over your things. It was still early so it was mostly deserted, but you weren’t alone for long.

“Hey y/n, you busy?”

You looked up to see one of your classmates, offering them a friendly smile. Before you could answer their question Chanhee had appeared, shoving them to the side and pulling up a chair next to you. He draped his arm across your shoulder, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“She’s busy, and taken, so get lost.”

“What the fuck, Chanhee!?”

“I… I’ll message you later.”

The boy awkwardly excused himself, leaving you alone with Chanhee. You were quick to shrug him off, glaring daggers at him after you wiped away his saliva from your cheek.

“What are you doing?”

“Protecting what’s mine. Can’t just have some random guy try to hit on you.”

“He wasn’t hitting on me.”

“Are you sure? Cause that’s what-”

“He’s my project partner and we need to get together to work on the presentation.”

“Ah, so he is trying to get some alone time with you.”

“For fucks sake, leave me alone.”

“You should really stop saying that, cause it’s not gonna happen.”

“A girl can dream.”

“Or make a wish. You can have any career you want right now, you’d just have to wish for it. I think ten years is long enough to make a name for yourself.”

“But I don’t want ten years, I want my life.”

The library wasn’t the place to be, so you packed up and left, grateful that Chanhee got the hint and didn’t follow. You waited in the empty classroom for the rest of your peers and for the professor to arrive. For the rest of the day you didn’t run into Chanhee, but he was still on your mind. When you got back to the sorority house you tracked down Yaz and Sal. Although you could only find Yaz, as Sal had her first day at her internship and wasn’t around.

“Yaz!”

“What?”

“How did you know about a demon summoning ritual?”

“Why? Do you have regrets now? You should have made a wish when you had the chance.”

“I don’t care about that, just tell me how you summoned a demon!”

“It was Sal’s idea. She got a book from one of her classmates.”

“Where’s the book?”

“No idea, her room maybe, unless she gave it back.”

“You two are unbelievable.”

You went up to Sal’s room, going through her things until you found a very odd book at her desk. There was no title and the cover was made of black leather. This screamed danger, but Sal didn’t seem to care. You opened it up, seeing all kinds of demonic drawings, the writing in a language you understood although there were some parts you didn’t. You really couldn’t believe those two thought it was a good idea to actually follow one of these rituals. Eventually you found the bookmark Sal had left, seeing the instructions for summoning a demon. It was stated there that any wish could be granted in exchange for a soul.

The book didn’t specify if the wish maker had to give up their soul, but you weren’t sure who to trust between a book and a demon. Still, you took the book with you, needing to examine it some more and figuring out whether or not it could help you. That night you looked over the entire book, but it was nothing but rituals and spells with the bare minimum of information. It was a dead end, but then you realized that other books like this might exist, and those could have the answers you’re looking for. You continued your search online, looking for any other source of information, even checking your own school library to see if they had such books.

No luck on that, but you found a bookstore nearby that carried what you were looking for. The next day during your free period you went to the bookstore, keeping to yourself as you browsed the shelf of demonic books. You were trying to see if there was any similarity between the one you had and the ones here. You thought you were alone until someone appeared and snatched the book out of your hands. You were ready to explain yourself, and that all this was just for a research paper, but you merely glared when you saw Chanhee flipping through the pages of the book he took from you.

“I didn’t think you’d be interested in all this.”

“What do you care?”

“Well, I’m touched, you’re doing research on me.”

“As if.”

“You know, you didn’t need to go looking, you could just ask me.”

Chanhee gave you a smile as the book in his hand went up in flame, disappearing into nothing as if it never existed.

“Why did you do that!”

“Cause I’m an open book, so tell me, what do you want to know?”

“What is wrong with you!?”

“I’m a demon, I’m not exactly a nice person. I’m from hell after all.”

You were so done with Chanhee at this point, but it wasn’t like you could do anything to him. Still, if he was so willing to talk, maybe you could get some information out of him.

“How old are you?”

“Don’t you think it’s rude to ask such a question.”

“You said you were an open book.”

“Touché. Let’s just say I’m hundreds of years old.”

“Woah, so you’ve been around to witness a lot of things.”

“I have. It’s a good life, just going around making deals, getting more power, and I’m very handsome. Sounds cool, don’t you think?”

“Cool? You’re going around ruining people’s lives.”

“Quite the opposite in fact. I grant people’s wishes. They get whatever they desire, and the same applies to you too. So, you should make a wish to better your own life soon, time is wasting.”

🖤

Despite losing the book, it didn’t deter you from continuing your research. The bookstore was a bust as all they had there was legends and vague information. In all honesty none of those books were like the original one you had, so that meant you had to move your search to the internet. Although you couldn’t fully immerse yourself in that as you still had to focus on your own studies. The extra work certainly exhausted you as everything was important. By the end of the week you were completely spent. You got back to your dorm room and collapsed on the bed. You thought you’d just fall asleep, but you had an unexpected visitor.

“It’s way too early to go to bed, especially on a Friday night.”

“Fuck off, Chanhee.”

“Awe, I love the way you say my name.”

“Go away!”

“Are you gonna make a wish?”

“No.”

“Hm, then let me grant you one anyway.”

“Huh?”

When you opened your eyes you were no longer in bed, but found yourself seated at a table, Chanhee across from you. He had his elbows on the table, fingers interlaced as he rested his chin on them, a big smile on his face.

“How about a delicious dinner?”

“What?”

You looked around and realized you were at some high class restaurant, and most importantly your clothes were different. You were in a fancy dress, and Chanhee matched your outfit. This place was way beyond you, and not somewhere you would go on your own.

“Chanhee, where the heck are we?”

“It’s nice right.”

“How did you change my clothes?”

“I didn’t peek, I swear.”

“Take me back.”

“We just got here. Besides you must be-”

“I don’t wanna be here. Please.”

“Fine.” Chanhee sighed. “Something else then.”

Chanhee snapped his fingers and then everything changed in the blink of an eye. You weren’t back in your room as you wanted, but somewhere else. The whole change was disorienting, but this place looked familiar.

“How’s this?”

“Where…”

“It’s your favorite, right?”

“How did you know?”

“You’re mine, so I know everything about you. Let’s order, and it’s on me tonight.”

Before you could say anything more a waitress came over to the table. Chanhee ordered and then he looked at you. This was your favorite place, so you didn’t need to look at the menu, but you weren’t sure this whole thing was a good idea. It was quiet for too long so Chanhee just ordered for you instead, giving the waitress a smile and thanks.

“Why are you doing this?”

“You looked like you needed a break, so I figured I’d provide. If you make a good wish you wouldn’t have to work so hard, you know.”

“Yeah, you keep saying that.”

Even if this wasn’t your plan, you actually quite enjoyed the night. Some good food after a long week, and it being free, it was nice. Afterwards Chanhee walked you back to the sorority house. You still had homework to do, but when you got to your room you noticed a note on your desk.

Get some sleep.

You were confused, but then you noticed all your things laid out on the desk were complete. He had done your homework for you. It sounded ridiculous, but you double checked everything, and it was good.

“Unbelievable.”

A demon did your homework, that was certainly a first. Since you had nothing else, and it was late, you got ready for bed. For once you’d have the weekend to yourself, and you couldn’t help but feel grateful to Chanhee, not that you would tell him. If anything, this gives you more time to focus on your research and find a way out of that stupid contract.

🖤

The weekend was nice, but come Monday things fell into chaos. You were woken up by Sal and Yaz screaming in your face.

“Y/n! Where is that damn book!”

“Huh… what are you-”

“The demon book!” Yaz yelled. “Where is it!?”

“Uh… I lost it…”

“How!?”

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“We need to talk to that demon, it tricked us!”

“What are you talking about?”

“It lied!” Sal screamed. “I lost my internship this weekend cause apparently I’m not a team player, whatever that means.”

“My whole family got screwed over with the inheritance.” Yaz added. “We just got a couple pennies.”

“Well… can’t you-”

“No! Since he left us something, we can’t contest the will, this fucken sucks!”

“I… I don’t have the book.” You stated. “But maybe you can ask the guy who gave it to you? He might know something.”

“I haven’t seen him since that day.” Sal said. “He must have dropped the class or something.”

“Oh…”

“Gosh, you don’t remember the spell, do you Yaz?”

“Why would I?”

“Ugh! What are we gonna do?”

“At least you still have your souls…” You commented.

“Whatever. Never trusting a demon again.”

That was quite a wake up call, but you were also very surprised to learn that Chanhee had been telling the truth. The two of them getting their wishes was just a coincidence, and false hope at that. Your name, your soul, was on the contract, so the wish was really yours to make. Still, you wanted no part of this, so you’d continue looking for your way out. As you were walking to class Chanhee suddenly appeared next to you.

“Did you have a good weekend?”

“I spent my time well.”

“I see. And how was this morning? Anything interesting?”

“Why are you asking when you already know the answer?”

“Cause I’m curious to know how you took it?”

“Well the girls were upset they lost everything, and I told them I lost the book since someone swallowed it up in flames.”

“If they had the book it wouldn’t do them any good. The spell just summons demons, there’s no guarantee the same one will show up.”

“I’m sure they’ll figure something out.”

“And what about you? Any wishes yet?”

“You know you can just drop that. I’m not gonna make a wish.”

“You’re wasting a great opportunity.”

“I am trying to save my soul here.”

“Why? Are you so sure you’ll get into heaven?”

“I’m certainly not gonna go to hell with you.”

“We’ll see about that.”

It was a slow Monday so after your classes you returned to the sorority house to relax and continue your extra curricular activities. Searching the web for information on demons wasn’t any easier, but at least there were more options. Most websites seemed to be for show or people interested in the occult, but nothing concrete. That is until you came across an interesting file. It seemed to be a scanned copy of a book, and just by the look of it you had hope. You could tell the pages were old, and there was no proper title.

This actually looked like the original book you had, so you paid close attention as you read the pages. It was a large file, but given the detail you were very hopeful. Other types of rituals and information on the supernatural were mentioned here. It seemed legit, and then you found what you were looking for. This was a different type of spell to summon a demon, but it spoke of the contracts one could make. It specified that one had to give up their own soul, and that they could only make a wish that would directly impact their lives. The biggest point to note was your way out. Even if a contract was signed, if a wish isn’t made within the ten year time frame then it is rendered void.

“Oh my gosh…”

You read it over and over again, unable to believe your eyes but also feeling such immense relief. No wonder Chanhee kept pushing for you to make a wish, without one the contract isn’t technically sealed. You were so excited to know you could keep your soul.

“So, what are we celebrating?” Chanhee asked, randomly appearing on your bed. “Do you finally know what to wish for?”

“I know you’re a liar.”

“Huh?”

“Y/n!”

You heard someone shout your name and then Sal burst into your room. She immediately started asking you about the book again, wondering how exactly you lost it, but stopped when she noticed Chanhee.

“It’s you…”

“Yeah, he’s the-”

“You gave me that book!”

“I’m sorry, he what?”

“You’re the guy from my class who told me about the spell to summon a demon.”

“Awe, you actually remember my face.” Chanhee giggled. “And how’s life treating you?”

“You lied! The demon didn’t grant my wish!”

“Well, to be fair, the wish was never for you.”

“Huh?”

“You gave her the book… why?” You questioned. “What reason do you have-”

“What are you talking about, y/n?”

“He’s the demon you summoned! And he’s the one who gave you the book, I just don’t understand why he’d do that.”

“You’re the demon?” Sal asked. “You tricked us!”

“I am a demon after all, and I’m done with you.”

“Well I’m just-”

“Shall we change things up?”

Chanhee raised his hands and snapped his fingers, taking you somewhere else. It took a second to settle down, taking in your surroundings. You had been at your desk a moment ago, but now you were sitting on a bed. The sheets were smooth and red, and the room itself seemed very luxurious. It was just you and Chanhee here.

“Where am I?”

“My room.” Chanhee explained. “In hell of course.”

“What! No, I can’t be in hell!”

“Well, you already have one foot in the grave.”

“I don’t.”

“You signed a-”

“The contract is incomplete.” You stated. “Unless I actually make a wish, my soul is still mine.”

“Hm, what makes you-”

“That’s why you keep pushing a wish on me, you don’t actually own my soul yet. The only thing I don’t understand is why you would trick the others into summoning you and making a deal.”

“The answer is quite simple love. Who did I make a deal with after all? Who signed?”

“I did but-”

“Your little friends forced your hand.”

Chanhee came over and sat beside you, leaning in close. His hand gently caressed your cheek and the grabbed your chin.

“Such a pretty and intelligent girl can have whatever she wants. There’s no need to ever summon or make a deal. It made me want you so bad, but I had to use other means. Your little friends weren’t hard to trick into doing what I wanted.”

“You’re crazy.” You pulled yourself away from him. “I’ll never be yours! You’ll never have my soul! As long as I don’t make a wish, the contract is void.”

“Is that so?”

Chanhee suddenly pinned you down, black eyes staring back at you with a sinister smile. There was this dark aura around him, and for once you actually felt scared. Next thing you knew you felt chains around your wrists going taut and keeping you in place.

“It was very annoying to get those two to offer you up to me, and I expected us to be having a good time by now, but instead you’ve been looking for a way to get rid of me.” Chanhee growled. “I spent months watching you, waiting, and I won’t lose you over a fucken technicality. The best wish you could make is to be mine, so you won’t suffer in hell and live like me.”

“I’m not making a wish!”

“Is that so? Are you so sure that you’ll never utter the words ‘I wish’ in the next ten years? I’ll be watching closely, and accept whatever wish you make as sincere. So it’s better if you make a good one now while you still can.”

“Fuck you! Now that I know the contract is void, I’ll focus on finding a way to kill you, then I’ll truly be free.”

“If you’re so hell bent on denying me, then I’ll take matters into my own hands. I won’t lose you!”

Chanhee pressed his lips against yours, kissing you deeply. Your eyes went wide and you squirmed beneath him, but that didn’t get him off. Instead you felt something thick and irritating going down your throat, as if you were breathing in smoke. Your head started to spin, and when Chanhee pulled away you took in a deep breath.

“Y/n, can you hear me?”

“Uh… what… what did you…”

“All I need you to do is to repeat after me.”

“Hm…”

“I wish to belong to Chanhee. Now you say it.”

“I… I…”

“We’ll be the perfect companions. Now say it.”

“I wish…”

90 notes · View notes

tiny-buzz · 1 year ago

Text

Nice dinner party. Great ambiance, jazz trio, gorgeous women and powerful men. But, let me ask you this, person to person, as we sit down to sup . . .

Was this delightful capellini finished with "Brand X" clam oil?

Because, friend, if you cheaped out on the clam oil, then buddy, you're missing the point

Thankfully, I brought a flask of my own. Top shelf, the best there's ever been.

Regis Philbin's very own REGIS PHILBIN'S AUTHENTIC ITALIAN CLAM OIL. And before you interrupt me to ask, yes, friend: it's "Italian-style." Frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way. Take a sip, and let's pass it around the table.

See, Regis Philbin was content with life. He was a man of influence, power. He alone decided who lived and who died within a beautiful system of machinery. His body glistened in the Santa Monica sunrise. But, like all men do, he sought something greater.

A few phone calls later, and Regis was talking to the Pope, his Holiness.

"Pope, listen," Regis said, with candor and excitement. "We're gonna shake up the stodgy clam oil market. We're gonna take it back to the way things used to be, Papa."

"Holy moly," said the Pontiff, saluting everything Regis was running up the flag pole.

A few months later, the finished product was unveiled to a municipal gymnasium of earthquake survivors. "The rich velvet of the clam stands in playful contrast to everything I THOUGHT I knew about Italian-Style Italian Clam Oil!" said a grieving mother who just hours prior had lost her only Nintendo.

So, listen, friend: next time you hold a little get-together? A little congregation? A little State dinner? A little shindig? A little Tweetup? A little funeral? A little fistfight? A little soiree? A little cult orgy? A little board game night? A little solstice? Make sure not to humiliate yourself, and spring for the bottle made by Regis, endorsed by the Church, and individually kissed by Madam Wolverine herself.

Now let's all raise a bucket of the good stuff (clam oil) and cheers our imperfect host as we celebrate Regis Weekend being extended through and including the day of Tuesday, October 17, 2023.

#regis weekend #honor the man #regis clam oil #regis ass oil #clam juice

70 notes · View notes

translucent-at-best · 10 months ago

Text

Scatter-brained...

I told myself I'd start back on dating apps on April 13th. I've also told three friends. I'm like... 50% ready and 50% regretting mentioning it to them because I know they'll hold me accountable (which is, of course, why I told them in the first place). Welp. We gon' see.

Bought myself a vacuum mop combo cleaner that got delivered today and I'm irrationally excited to use it. This feels very 30s of me. I also made myself an Amazon wishlist of things I want to get for my apartment and am going to buy myself something off it every month. Next month, I'm looking to get a stool for my shower (because I've had one too many close calls standing up and masturbating with my shower head). Shit, maybe I'll get two things since it'll be my birthday month. We'll see.

I really live in LA. I was driving on the freeway over the weekend, on the way to visit a friend, and it was warm enough to roll my windows down. It's March. And this is my reality because I live in LA now and not the east coast city I grew up in. I wanted to do this shit and I did it. And I've built community out here. That thought hit me hard the other day. Thank you, God. Thank you, me.

I need a new job and I don't want one doing what I went to school for. Fuck. I'm over having a front row seat just to watch all the ways this world and this government are fucking these kids up every chance they get.

I said I was going to schedule and go to all my doctor's appointments this year. So far, I've had two appointments and I've got more scheduled. I said I was going to travel and see my family more this year. So far, I've gone home for my uncle's funeral, I'm going to Hawaii with my family next week, and in May, I'm traveling to NM for my cousin's college graduation. I said I was going to join a gym and I did that. I said I was going to start taking more walks and I've been doing that. I said I was going to get my retirement accounts in order and I've done that. I said I was going to get a travel credit card and I did that too.

I trick myself into thinking that I'm not making any progress on my goals just because they're not all accomplished right now today and that's not fair to me. I be doing shit.

I miss watching it grow from soft to hard. I miss a lot of things, to be honest.

These stores really just up and stopped selling plus sizes without a word about it. Now it's, "not in store, but we have them online." Fuck good is it doing me there? Especially when there's no uniformity in sizing. Ugh, they make my ass itch. I'm trying to shop for vacation clothes and this shit is blowing me.

Listen... I ain't never had any interest in dating outside of my race, but uh... if I get to Hawaii and a tall and sturdy, bearded Samoan get to winking at me I'm gonna need y'all to mind your business, hear?

This is long as shit, ain't it? I don't know why I have it in my mind that these Scatter-brained posts have to have at least ten bullet points. Who is that rule for? I don't even know when I came up with it. I can literally not do it at any point, but for some reason...

#scatter #scatter-brained

9 notes · View notes

altschmerzes · 1 year ago

Text

for those of you playing along at home, i made it through the funeral/memorial/whatever. honestly could’ve been worse.

this is long and probably tmi but im processing out loud ig. probably should just keep a journal instead but here we are.

yesterday sucked ass mostly because like. at some point in the last two years since i started law school/moved to canada my father sent me some package at my grandmother’s house. yes this is after i made it very clear i did not want to see or hear from him. years after i made that clear. he did this fairly regularly - tried to give me things or pass messages through my sister or my mother or grandmother. anyway she asked if i wanted it, i was like. uh. No. and i guess she kept it for Some Reason because when i was very briefly at her house before heading to where the memorial happened today she pointed me at a pile of my things she wanted me to look at and there was a package. and on autopilot or something because ive been completely f r i e d out of my gourd this weekend i made the mistake i havent made in YEARS and opened it.

and i gotta say if i were going to ignore my daughter’s very clearly communicated boundaries and attempt to get in touch with her after she made it extremely clear she did not want me to do that SIX YEARS AGO at the time my go-to method of somehow persuading her to drop her decision to go no-contact wouldn’t involve [checks notes] a pearl necklace and a three-plus page letter about how nothing was ever my fault.

threeeeeee and then some pages of self-pitying guilt trip about how everyone turned their backs on him and other people kept us apart (as if that was the problem, the years of his absence rather than the years of his abuse) and how he knows the alcohol was bad but he’s off it now! he’s had such a hard life! i should stop punishing myself and other people! he won’t be around forever! (ISNT THAT IRONIC. LMAO.) after finishing this letter he TWICE decided he needed to add extra bits about how things don’t have to be like this, they can be better, and how im making “uninformed decisions” about him without knowing “the whole story.”

yikes.

anyways. that sucked and fucked me up real bad but my fiancé and i burned it last night on the beach and i threw the pearls (pearls? really? PEARLS?????) into the pacific.

then today. it was honestly fine. none of his friends seemed to even know i refused to speak to him, as they talked to me like they were assuming i was around all the time and super involved in his life. not sure what to make of that but it made it very easy to smile and nod and thank them for coming and not worry about anything further than that. he knew some cool people honestly. they were pretty neat, and his partner of 11 years, effectively my stepmom, is kind of awesome tbh. no idea what she was doing with him. and also my sister only yelled at me in front of some 50+ people once. for my sister this was a win.

and my brother came.

that was….. shocking. i had been in contact with his mom on and off about this but it was NOT clear at all if he was gonna show up. i figured not, honestly, because he’s so hard to get ahold of and none of us have seen him since 2016. but he came. and he brought his kids. my nephew is going into fifth grade and my niece is starting second and oh my gd they’re great. they’re adorable and funny and such sweet kids and i hand to gd thought id never see them again. now it looks like they’re going to come to my wedding reception when we have one out here so my family can attend something. it’s…. i didnt think id ever see or speak to him again and definitely not the kids. but there they were. i stood next to my brother with his arm around my shoulders and mine around his waist while my mom gave a little speech to everyone who was there thanking them for coming and felt him breathing and couldn’t believe it was real. i dug around in the sand with my niece and my nephew must have hugged me about a half-dozen times. they’re good, sweet kids and my brother is a kind, patient father.

tomorrow’s gonna suck, taking a redeye home, gonna land at like 5 am tuesday and then have to cross my fingers and hope border control is chill with me, this whole situation has been a complete nightmare (except for my wife being there, thank gd) but today was as good as it possibly could’ve been. it’s probably gonna take me a while to really like….. even out from this, i think, but it’s almost over and then i get to live the rest of my life without worrying about ever seeing that man again.

what he did to me is going to follow me the rest of my life but HE won’t because he’s fucking dead and im alive and that means i won.

#gav gab #death cw #abuse cw #goes into some addiction stuff too

28 notes · View notes

castielsprostate · 1 year ago

Note

I'm nosy af. I want to see Misha's bank statements and tax returns. I genuinely wonder (like, all the time) what decent rich people (not asshole rich people.. i know what they spend their money on) actually spend their money on. I've never had money. I spend everything i get on food and rent. I go into debt buying shampoo and deodorant. my laptop is 12 years old (and i had to get a loan to buy that and pay it off over five years.) My phone is newer (2016) but was a secondhand gift. I don't own a car. I don't have any pets. I've never in my life been on vacation. I have no insurance, I'll never be able to afford a house and I will almost certainly die tens of thousands of dollars in debt. (I looked into funeral expenses recently and thought FUCK i can't even afford to die!) I wonder what it feels like to.. not live like this? Misha was poor as a kid. I wonder if you get used to wealth if you've been dirt poor? Like i wonder if Dolly Parton is used to being rich now, decades after growing up in a shack with no electricity or running water. I can't even imagine ever getting used to not worrying about having enough food. If I was ever that rich (don't have to worry about food or rent money) I think i'd feel like the wealthiest person in the world. I legit can't even imagine it though. It would take me 20 years to earn $250,000, but Misha can do it in a weekend. Crazy world. (This is not a criticism of him. I love him. I bet he spends a lot of that money doing good things. I'd love to see his receipts, tho.)

oh anon i feel you!!!!! i grew up with literally eating 50p macaroni every day for WEEKS. in the winter we didn't have connected heating because we just couldn't pay for it so we had a diesel generator (this was in 2006). it got better, we got heating (sort of lmao) and we could afford wayyy more when my mum got a job. the little bits of money i got, i never got used to it, it always felt like this is the last im getting i need to save this and not spend that but it didn't go away but the feeling stayed. the feeling of "you're gonna lose this next month" doesn't go away. and we're talking an amount of 1k a month here lmao sjsjsjs i could NEVER imagine having to not worry about rent or food or getting clothes i need or new shampoo. right now i'm worrying about the 15€ i need for some things i genuinely need, but literally dont have the money for. the world would seem so much brighter if I wouldn't even have to look at my bank account and just put the card down yknow?

i dont think anyone that grew up poor, even misha or dolly tbh, every get used to having money :/ and as you said, he makes that in a weekend now (though he also donates a lot of money and uses it for good, a lot is going into investments, his kids' funds etc) but i still think he has that underlying worry gnawing at him that this is it and he's gonna have to do xyz and sell yzx and take up zyx job. it's a never ending pool of anxiety and stress that never ebs and it probably hits him right before going to bed

but then again, i'm just tumblr user castielsprostate what do i know

#sorry anon this probably makes no sense jsjsjsjsjsj but i think i got what you're saying yknoq #i love misha (and dolly) and im honestly happy that they got out of it yknow? i hope to be there one day too #it takes a lot. mentally especially. because there's also the added guilt? whenever i get money. even from jobs my mind #always goes “someone else can use this” or “someone else is in need of it more”#the guilt of it all. i wonder how they deal with it to be honest #anon's notes #notes #mishameta

7 notes · View notes

she-karev · 10 months ago

Text

Aftermath

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: Three of Three

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

AN: Here’s the final chapter guys, I hope you like it and I’ll try to post most stories by next weekend.

Summary: Amber gets a feedback from Webber about the meeting when her friends barge in.

Words: 2920

I stand by the nurse’s station outside Paul’s ICU room drinking my water to relax. Alex, Jo and Jenny are right outside the door waiting for Dr. Shepherd exam to determine if he’s brain dead. Grey and Jo were able to bring him back but they had to intubate him on a ventilator. Shepherd diagnosed him with second impact syndrome which never ends well in this case.

It’s weird him dying was something I thought would bring me joy but instead…it made me feel defeated. Paul died before we could press charges and expose him for the misogynistic, abusive low life he really is…was. In the end it just felt pointless everything he put us through when he’s not gonna pay for it. I can only hope that hell is real and he gets a special seat. I see Andrew entering the ICU and walk to me relieved.

“You’re okay.” Andrew exhales relieved.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” I put my water down to face him, “I take it the grapevine heard what happened.”

“Only that Stadler tried to attack Dr. Wilson and an intern. I came up as soon as I heard. Do I need to kick his ass?”

I look at him touched but point at Paul behind him. He looks and see’s the damage, “Even if you could kick his ass, I don’t think his brain would register it.”

Andrew looks back at me with a slightly feared look, “Did you do that to him?” I lightly smack his arm.

“He fell and hit his head after his fiancé told him she was gonna turn him in.” Andrew nods relieved, “His first concussion barely healed so the impact caused a brain bleed I think, we’ll know more once Dr. Shepherd confirms it.” I see Dr. Shepherd coming out and we stand by the others to get the news.

“Is he brain dead?” Jo asks plainly.

“We can’t say for certainty for a few more hours, but it appears the way.” Amelia explains and looks at Jo conflicted on what to say, “I’m-I’m very…I’m sorry. Are you comfortable talking to her about her options?”

Jo nods, “Yes.”

Amelia leaves us as Jenny asks Jo, “What does she mean by options?”

Alex explains, “Well she means you have to decide if you want to withdraw his life support.”

“Alex.” Meredith calls him and he turns to her, “It’s not up to her.”

I look at her confused for a second until I realize what she’s saying. Since the divorce wasn’t finalized before Paul went on a vent, Jo is still legally his wife. Which means this depraved shell of a man’s final wishes falls on her. I shake my head at the cruel outcome of this and Andrew realizes it too as he rubs my back in a futile attempt at comfort.

“Oh my god.” Jo makes the realization too, “It’s me. I’m still legally his wife.” There’s a tense second of silence until the next sound out of Jo catches me completely off guard. She laughs out with a smile, “Oh my god!”

I look at Jo startled by her reaction as she continues to laugh hysterically despite the tension. I wonder to myself if this is what I looked like last night to my friends after Paul came to me. If I was I’m embarrassed I looked this insane. I see the others looking at Jo concerned except Alex who grins slightly. To keep her from being sent to psych I explain.

“Laughter relieves tension.” I hope they can hear me over Jo who’s still laughing like a hyena, “People laugh at funerals all the time, it’s okay she’s okay.”

Jo starts to calm down, “Oh my god. I’m so sorry.” She stops for a second to laugh before composing herself, “I’m so sorry. Crap. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Jo finally stops laughing and now she’s sobbing cradling Alex’s face who looks at her with love.

I feel bad for Jo’s predicament and try to remedy it, “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“She’s right.” Grey chimes in, “You have power of attorney you can hand the decision off the someone else.”

Jo sniffles and fully composes herself before responding, “Thank you both…but this is my decision and I intend to make it.” I suddenly get an alert on my phone and look to see a text message from Webber saying, ‘Meet me in my office.’

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the ICU I gave an excuse that the office needed more information for my keycard. They buy it except for Jo who looks at me in pity and I shook my head to keep her quiet. Now I’m sitting in a chair across from Dr. Webber waiting to hear what this is about. I already know what this is about so I remind myself that I have nothing to be ashamed of.

If they want to fire me for my past then I’ll go on a rant and tell them I am not that angry teenager anymore. I am a surgical intern who has experienced pain that doesn’t make me crazy it makes me more able to connect with the next foster kid who got beat up by their guardian. Or a wife from a lowly neighborhood who can’t afford good healthcare. Or a teenage girl who has to pay for rent and take care of her family.

I am not gonna be ashamed of my past anymore. I think I came to this conclusion when I heard Jo and Jenny talking. Those two went through the ringer and instead of being beaten down they grew stronger and showed Paul that he didn’t break them. I went through hell but it didn’t break me, it made me stronger and I am not gonna let these guys judge me anymore.

Webber clears his throat, “Karev, I called you in here because-”

His words are cut short as his door bursts open and Dahlia comes in looking peeved. Behind her, Parker, Helm and Schmitt follow all standing by Webber’s desk like a small, baby blue army. I look at them surprised that they barged into our residency director’s office after spending the last month kissing up to him.

Webber looks at them stunned as well, “Dr. Qadri, Parker, Helm and Schmitt to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“You can’t do this.” Qadri starts, “You can’t fire someone for having a few scars and yes a few tiny arrests in her record before she was a C cup.” I widen my eyes at her and Parker steps in.

“It’s unlawful, and unjust and frankly sir it’s a bitch move to pull off this century when every little workplace incident is reported.”

“I can already see the headlines now.” Helm speaks next, “’Top Hospital Fire’s Surgeon for being Low Class.’ And that’s a nice one.”

“I-I don’t really want to say something to get me fired.” Schmitt stammers nervously and I roll my eyes at him, “But sir with all due respect she does not deserve to be fired for something out of her control…respectfully.”

“All right people I appreciate your input and this united front is something I hope for with my classes but-”

“If you fire her then I quit.” Qadri throws in and I look at her shocked.

“Are you stupid right now?” I ask her, “Don’t quit just because unlike you I have a problematic past.”

“A past you’ve worked hard to overcome.” Parker states, “And now you’re here in spite of all the obstacles and your superiors shouldn’t be another one. If that’s the kind of workplace I signed up for…then I’ll quit too.” I see Parker nudging Schmitt with his elbow and he gets the message.

“Um I’ll quit if you fire her.” I look at Helm to see her reaction and she doesn’t relent until Dahlia glares at her causing Helm to roll her eyes.

“Fine I’ll quit too.” Helm says without feeling.

“Damn it you guys we’re not doing Spartacus.” I say frustrated that they cut me from making my case to Webber, “I don’t need people from Mensa to defend me and quite frankly I don’t think the hospital will lose much from four interns quitting. I mean let’s face it my money was on Blood Bank getting kicked out the end of the year.”

Schmitt looks at me offended, “I was gonna lose my job for you!”

“Nobody is losing their jobs!” Webber yells out, “I called Dr. Karev in here to tell her that her job is safe and she is not fired.” I look at Webber in shock and I am silent for a moment before speaking.

“…What?”

“You’re not getting fired Karev.” Webber repeats, “Now listen Jennings pulled that meeting and told all of us to call you in so we can get an explanation for how this file came to our desk. After you explained that it was an attempt of harassment by Dr. Stadler after he cornered you yesterday, we decided to investigate further and see if the allegations were true. When we heard from the ICU nurses how he verbally assaulted his fiancé and moved to attack her it was clear there was nothing left to investigate.”

I exhale in relief at my good fortune for once, “So you all decided then to let me continue here?”

Webber winces, “Jennings was still insistent on letting you go and was gonna peer review it with the medical board.” My joy deflates, “But Dr. Avery went to the bat for you.” I look at him confused at Avery standing up for me and he explains, “He told Jennings that if he got the medical board to contact you, he would hire you the most bloodthirsty attorney out of his own pocket and make it so Jennings would lose his job and more.”

I widen my eyes at a plastic surgeon I’ve barely interacted with suddenly fighting for me to keep my job, “He really said that?”

“Word for word.” He turns to the interns who look relieved for me as well, “As for all of you there will be no need to quit in solidarity. I commend you for it though, not a lot of interns bond to the point of standing up to their residency director for a friend. It’s inspiring, loyalty is something I respect very much. It’s something people like Jennings could learn to adapt.”

“…So can I go then?” I ask him.

“Yes you may go.” I stand up and exit the room with the others and we all stand there frozen not knowing what to say. I clear my throat, “Thanks.”

Dahlia nods and the others grin appreciatively after that we go our separate ways.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After my first bit of good news today I stand next to Alex outside of Paul’s room while Jo and Jenny are inside no doubt wondering Jo’s next move as Paul’s power of attorney. We stand by each other tensely letting it sink in that this nightmare of ours is finally over.

Alex exhales, “I’m sorry.” I look at Alex confused by his apology and turns to me with guilty eyes, “I heard what you said in the lockers this morning.”

It takes a moment for me to remember one moment after this grueling day and simply say with a blank face, “Oh, you heard that.”

“Yeah I did. Look I’m not sorry for falling in love with Jo but I am sorry I made you feel like I ruined your life again.” I can tell that he’s being genuine, “Believe me if I had the chance again I would have killed him back at that damn conference I tracked him to.”

I inhale and exhale before responding, “If you did that he would win and Jo would be as scared of you as she was of him. I was angry and pissed off when I said that and I just wanted to lash out at the world instead of the one person responsible for it. But if I lashed out at him I wouldn’t be better than him either.” I sigh at that bitter truth, “I’ll tell you this though at least one of us got a good punch in before the lights went out.”

“Damn straight.” Alex agrees, “Listen I want to say thanks for standing by Jo when she confronted Paul so…thanks. I’m glad you were there if I couldn’t be.”

I look at Alex appreciatively, “Your welcome.” I decide to add one more thing, “She is way too good for you.”

Alex snickers quietly, “I’m glad I got your approval. And as of yesterday, DeLuca’s got mine.” I turn to him with shocked eyes. I don’t need my brother’s approval of who I date but oddly it makes me feel warm inside to know that he does.

“Thanks. I’ll pass the message on to him.”

“Not just yet.” I look at him curious and he grins, “Let him fear your big brother a little while longer.” I smack his arm even as he grins at his own joke. Meredith approaches us with a grin.

“It was a drunk driver.” We turn to her in shock over this news.

“What?!” Alex asks happily.

“They found the guy who hit Paul.” Meredith explains, “It was a drunk driver. So nobody has to go to Canada. She’s free.”

I exhale in relief for all of us not going to jail, “Thank god, I hate the cold and the Canadians are annoying as hell.” Alex chuckles lightly as Meredith leaves us to bask in our collected joy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Jo decided to donate Paul’s organs, I saw that as my cue to leave them to it and head to Joe’s with my friends. I owed them a drink for standing up for me earlier even though I acted like I didn’t need it. It was still nice and they’ve been good to me throughout this whole ordeal so it was the least I could do.

The bartender lines the shots for me, Taryn, Levi and Casey at the round table. Dahlia is with us but she can’t drink so I opt to buy her a coke instead. We grab our shots and they pause the drinks in midair to which I look at them confused.

“Don’t you want to make a toast?” Casey asks.

“No I don’t want to make a toast I want to drink.” They look at me annoyingly and I relent, “Fine here’s to the interns that were willing to quit for their friend even though she wouldn’t have done what they did.”

“Your horrible.” Helm tells me amused.

“I’m kidding.” I rectify, “I appreciate what you guys did it was ballsy, a little reckless but I don’t exactly have a high ground on that so cheers!” We clink out shots and swallow them down our throats. Helm and Schmitt groan and hiss at the burn causing me and Casey to look at them amused, “Wimps.”

Casey joins in, “Yeah can’t you guys handle your tequila?”

“Maybe if She-Karev didn’t spring for the cheap stuff I could.” Helm says.

“I said I was buying you a drink I didn’t say it was high quality.” I signal the bartender who looks to refill our shots but I speak out, “Oh no, not them just me my tab ended.”

“Figures.” Casey says knowingly, “I guess quantity is limited too.”

“Amber can I say something?” Schmitt asks me and I nod, “I think your totally amazing.”

I look at him surprised by his flattery and feel the need to point out, “Schmitt. I have a boyfriend and even if I didn’t I’m sorry but you’re not my type.”

“Ouch.” Casey whispers.

“I didn’t mean it like that.” Levi glares at Casey and turns to me, “I just mean…I-I look at your in the pit and the locker room and I used to think you had this most perfect life. In a million years I never would thought you had one single problem.”

I nod bitterly, “Well obviously I do.” Dahlia squeezes my hand in comfort as Schmitt continues.

“I know…and that’s why I think you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.” I look at Schmitt appreciative of his compliment. I look back at my shot glass in thought.

“No one’s ever really said that to me before.” I admit softly, “I mean being the freak with the psycho for a mom leaves you with the lifelong impression that your broken. And the teasing and bullying didn’t help either.” They look at my sympathetically which I also point out, “And the occasional pity stares weren’t a favorite of mine either.” They all stop staring.

Dahlia speaks, “Well hey I think it’s safe to say you showed all of them after getting an MD.”

I nod proudly, “Yeah I did, didn’t I?” I swig my beer and decide to change the subject, “Why do you think Avery stood up for me in there?”

Helm snorts, “I can think of one reason.”

“Is sex always the reason for you?” I ask her and she shrugs, “It doesn’t matter as long as it got me to keep my job. Just as long as he’s not expecting a special favor in return.”

Dahlia chuckles, “I think that would end with him worse off than Stadler.”

“You know that’s right.” I clink my beer with her glass and resume back to drinking with the others looking to end this horrible week.

#greys anatomy #amber karev #alex karev #jo wilson #andrew deluca #elizabeth gillies #liz gillies #giacomo gianniotti #headcanon

5 notes · View notes

theamazingmrcat · 4 months ago

Text

I went to college in 2010. Here's some of my takeaways.

Make notes of due dates and assignments IN PENCIL. Some professors CAN AND WILL change due dates with little notice, and the changes will sometimes NOT BE IN YOUR FAVOR. I once had a professor move all the due dates up two weeks. She mentioned she was doing that a grand total of one time.

If you notice that a ton of your classmates dropped your class in the first week, especially after going over the syllabus, THAT IS A RED FLAG. 10-20 students don't just all drop a class at once because they're feeling lazy or have other things to do. That's the canary in the coal mine.

Talk with friends who had that professor previously and see what they say. If the professor's name causes them to wince, that's probably not a good sign.

Get assignments done early, and try to space out your workload and studying. Otherwise, it all piles up and hits you like a freight train.

Don't pull all-nighters studying. You won't retain anything and will do worse in classes the next day. Instead, study during the day when you have some time. That way, your evenings and nights can be spent unwinding and relaxing. Also study on weekends during the day. Again, ALL-NIGHTERS ARE BAD. DO NOT DO THAT.

Seek advice from older friends. Don't try to get by on your own without some help. Otherwise, you'll have some fun mental breakdowns and burn out in a bad way.

Don't drink and party on school nights. You thought that one professor was bad on a good day? You haven't had them while hungover.

Some professors are genuinely bad people and are in fact looking for reasons to target certain students. It's not paranoia if they really are out to get you. One of my professors blatantly targeted the only black girl in our class. She had to go to two funerals because she lost her brother and father in the same car accident, so she missed two classes. The professor failed her for missing two classes and told her she, and I shit you not, "should have had both funerals on the same day." Meanwhile, the white student who missed a week because she went on a family vacation was told it was no big deal and to get notes from someone else. That professor was also friends with the department head, so she was untouchable.

Back up everything. Make copies of everything. HAVE A PAPER TRAIL. COVER YOUR ASS.

Get stuff done early in case you need to change anything or there's a processing issue.

Stay fed and hydrated.

STRIP CARD GAMES ARE A VERY BAD IDEA. The less said about "Strip Apples To Apples" the better.

Expect your school's internet to be a fragile thing held together by string. Local libraries are your friends, especially since your school's internet will crash or slow down a lot, especially when a new "Call of Duty" drops or one old professor accidentally uploads a crippling virus. I worked in tech support in college. I have horror stories.

Carry snacks in case you don't have time for a full meal, but don't forget you have the snacks. Otherwise, a semester goes by and there's something in your bag that needs to die by fire. That one didn't happen to me, but it did happen to the guy who sat next to me in my Communications class. I saw things I can never unsee.

For Christ's sake, PRACTICE BASIC HYGENE.

Use the restroom before class. Some professors will try to stop you from going during class and will lock the doors. Yes, that is illegal. No, they don't care. Yes, they have tenure and probably about 30 complaints against them. If you find out they pull that shit, that's a sign it's time to gtfo.

Communicate with your roommate when you're gonna have someone over for sex, and try not to be a dick about when you have someone over. It's your roomie's room, too.

Your freshman year, especially if you go to any cons as a college freshman, you'll probably blow through a ton of money. I'm very much the wrong person to ask about what to do if that happens, but know it will probably happen.

It might take you a little while to find your people. Join clubs, talk to people, and you'll find your friends.

Nobody drives worse than school security. Look both ways before crossing. Our school security t-boned at least one student a year. They were not good at their jobs.

If possible, try not to get the dorm next to the bathroom. The sounds and smells will haunt you. Had to spent a damn hour listening to a woman faking an orgasm in the shower because her partner had no idea what the hell he was doing. IT WAS 3AM AND I HAD A FINAL THE NEXT DAY!

DO NOT KEEP IMPORTANT PAPERS OR TECH ON THE FLOOR OF YOUR DORM ROOM. Our hall's restroom flooded one year, and that toilet water went into almost every room except mine, since mine was next to the stairs and the water went down the stairs instead. Guy I knew spent the next two months hunting for whoever caused the flood by clogging the toilet so badly.

If your dorm floods or anything along those lines, the school will tell you they'll reimburse you for damages. They will not. That is a lie they told so you won't sue.

Anything at the school store is overpriced.

I got a million more tips like this, especially for senior year.

Actual good first-time college student advice:

Wear jeans/pants that “breathe” and bring a sweater, even if it’s scorching hot out, until you know which building blasts the AC to 60 degrees F and which feels like a sauna

Backpacks with thick straps are your friend! Messenger bags are cool and all but if you’re commuting with a lot of stuff, symmetrically styled backpacks are better for your back

You are your own person and you can walk out whenever you need to or want to, so long as you’re not disrupting the class. Meaning you can go to the bathroom without permission, take a breather if you’re anxious, answer an important phone call, etc.

If you don’t like the class on the first day, if you can- DROP THAT CLASS AND TAKE ANOTHER ONE! It’ll only get worse from there!

If you can, take a class outside your major; it’s a good break from your expected studies.

You are in charge of your schedule. Your adviser and guidance counselor is there to ‘advise and guide’ but if you don’t like certain classes and you can substitute for others, that’s your choice.

Consequently, if you are changing anything drastic in your plan, talk with your adviser and instructors.

Pay attention to your credit hours and grades. Never leave this to the last week of school, you will be sorry and stressed beyond belief!

Unless it’s a lab book or otherwise specified, go to the class for a week or so before buying an expensive textbook. Some classes, while having it on their required list, do not actually use the textbook a whole lot and you might find some of it scanned online. Rent if you can or buy used online (schools actually don’t give discounts). Use your best judgement on what you think you need.

Tell the people who go up to you selling or advertising things you are not interested in that you are in a rush to class and don’t have time to listen to them. It’s less rude and they’ll leave you alone.

The smaller the class, the better it is to have some sort of acquaintanceship with a couple classmates. They might save your ass if you are absent one day or need to study. And talking with them makes the time go by faster without it being so insufferable.

You don’t need to join a club or sport, but internships are cool and useful!

If you can afford it, take a day off once or twice each semester if you’re too exhausted. Just be aware of what you missed and if it was worth missing!

Your health is the most important, this goes for mental health too!! Note: College-age/upper teens is when mental disorders like depression and anxiety are most commonly diagnosed. Most schools have therapy services, especially during exam time. Look into it if you need to!

Communicate with your professor if you are having trouble with something. Anything.

Eat and stay hydrated. Bring a water bottle and snack to class.

All-nighters will happen but never go over 36 hours without sleep.

It’s going to be hard and there will be times you might think about giving up. This WILL happen. You just have to make sure what you’re doing isn’t making you absolutely miserable and/or there is something rewarding and positive to look forward to at the end!

334K notes · View notes

miguelschamp · 1 year ago

Text

marjorie

pairing: conrad fisher x fem!reader

summary: after your grandmother’s passing, conrad’s the only one can who make it a little easier

warnings: mentions of death, very sad :(

you were numb. even with all the movement around you, you felt like you weren’t even here. just a shell of yourself. almost like you were outside of your body looking down at yourself.

you were at your grandmother’s funeral reception and you just wanted to get out. you missed her like crazy already and to see so many people trying to make light of her death made you sick to your stomach.

you couldn’t count the amount of times that people have come up to you to offer some pity comfort. you couldn’t even muster up a polite smile. just raising your brows in acknowledgment before they eventually walk off.

conrad watched from across the room as another person you barely knew came up to you. he could see your eyes looking elsewhere as they spoke to you.

he hated knowing that no matter how much anyone tries, they wouldn’t really be able to help much.

when his mother died, he felt his whole world collapse around him. he couldn’t stand everyone coming to him and trying to offer words of comfort. he knew in a way they were just trying to be nice, but it just made things worse. he knew exactly how you felt.

he remembered listening to your different stories each summer about your grandmother. how wide your smile was each time you recounted the trips you would take and the weekends you would spend together. he never actually got to meet her, but he knew if he did, he would’ve loved her.

“how is she?” someone says. conrad turns as laurel and steven walk over. your mother inviting them and belly and himself and jeremiah. he turns back to you.

“not good i’m guessing.” conrad says, “i’m too nervous to check on her. i’ve seen so many people pity her today.”

“well, i’m sure she’d enjoy your company.” laurel says softly, “you two have always been the closest.”

conrad turns to them as steven nods, “it’s true. if there’s anyone she’s gonna wanna see right now, it’s you.”

conrad sighs as he turns back to you. your eyes staring ahead of you. a very blank expression covering your features. before his mind could convince him any different, he makes his way over to you.

you’re too into your own thoughts to notice conrad standing right beside you. he looks you over before gently placing his hand on your shoulder. your head snaps up before your body relaxes slightly.

“hey, how you holding up?” he asks hesitantly. he knew it was a stupid question, a question he too hated, but he just needed to hear your voice.

he sees your eyes begin to shine with fresh tears as you shake your head, “it’s too much.”

conrad’s brows furrow slightly as you look down. he squats beside you placing a comforting hand on your thigh.

“you wanna go outside? we can get some fresh air.” he suggests. you nod softly as you wipe under your eyes, “okay.”

he stands up taking your hand to help you up. he places his hand on your back as he gently leads you to the door.

on the way out, he catches your mother’s eyes. she was now standing next to laurel and steven. the woman gives an appreciative smile with a nod, but sadness was very evident in her features. he returns it as he follows you out.

he sits beside you on the step placing his arms on his knees. you look down at your hands as you pick at your fingernails. you sniffle before taking a deep breath.

“i don’t know if i can do it, conrad.”

“do what?”

“go on without her.” you say looking over at him, “i don’t think i can do it. i don’t want to.”

his heart broke as he listened to you, “y/n/n, it’s gonna be okay.”

“no, it’s not.” you snapped, “everyone’s been saying that all day and i’m so sick of hearing it.”

conrad didn’t take your tone to heart. he knew you weren’t angry with him. just sad that someone so important to you was gone.

“i know. look, at first it’s going to be really hard. really fucking hard.” he nods, “but you know that your grandma wouldn’t want you to talk like this.”

you scoff, “so what am i supposed to do? just act like everything is okay?”

“no.” he says simply, “mourn her. be as sad as you want to be for as long as you need to. but don’t give up on yourself because you know she wouldn’t want that.”

you blink rapidly as you wipe more tears from under your eyes, “how am i supposed to do that?”

conrad sighs softly, “there’s not really a written guide on to do that. you just do it however you need to.”

you look over at him with sad eyes. and for once, someone wasn’t looking at you with an overwhelming amount of pity. just genuine concern and support.

“i can’t do that by myself.”

“you don’t need to.” he shakes his head, “i’m right here. okay?”

you nod softly as he wraps his arm around your shoulder. he pulls you to lay your head on his shoulder which you gladly accept. he rubs your arm while placing a small kiss on your head.

your eyes shut as another tear escapes. you knew this was probably going to be the hardest thing you’ve had to go through. but knowing conrad would be by your side through it all, made it a little easier.

#conrad fisher #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher imagine #chris briney #tsitp #tsitp imagine #the summer i turned pretty #miguelschamp

191 notes · View notes

survey--s · 1 year ago

Text

630.

What does the shirt you are wearing look like? It's just a pale grey knitted jumper.

What was the last thing that stressed you out or upset you? Not getting much sleep last night.

How do you stay positive with all that life throws at you? I mean, I just keep going. I have bills and shit to pay so opting out isn't really an option at this point lol.

What quality do you admire most in other people? I really admire creativity. <--- yeah, let's go with that.

What is your most prized possession? I don't know, the house and car I guess lol.

Which youtuber do you feel like you could be friends with easily? I don't watch YouTubers but there's a guy called Richard something on TikTok who seems really funny and nice. He does commentary on those ASMR and restocking type videos.

Do you like your natural hair color? I like it more now than I did when I was younger.

Do you think you will dye your hair when you start going gray? I always thought I would, but lately I've been thinking that natural grey/white hair looks better.

Are you pale right now, or do you have a tan? I'm pale as always, lol.

Do you think you look best with a tan? Yeah, I like how I look with a tan.

What is your favorite app on your phone? TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Spotify and various games.

How old were you when you got your first smartphone? They didn't really exist when I was a kid so I was probably 18-19.

Do you ever meditate on Scripture? No.

Are you living a life you want to escape from? or do you love your life? Life is pretty great, I'm not gonna lie.

When was the last time you felt that life was good? Right now. I'd be happier if I wasn't absolutely shattered though lol.

Do you have one big mistake that you’ve made that you want to fix? No.

Do you wish people would forgive you for your past so you could move on? I don't really feel the need to be forgiven.

Do you wear green on St. Patrick’s day? No. St Patrick's Day really isn't a thing here.

Are you Irish at all? No.

Do you pray to God every day? No. I'm not even a little bit religious.

What are three things you are currently looking forward to doing soon? Going away for the weekend next month and that's about it at this point lol. I have some time off in December but I have another few months to go yet.

Do you ever dance in the rain? I have done before.

Have you ever sat on a rooftop? Yeah.

Who is that last good musician or band you discovered? Taylor Austin Dye or Kylie Morgan.

Do you like to watch talent shows like America’s Got Talent and X Factor? No. I think the beginnings of them are really horrible, honestly.

Have you ever tried avocado toast? I have - it's pretty good, I'm not gonna lie.

Name three items on your wish list right now. I don't really have anything on there right now, to be honest.

Are you more talented musically or artistically or neither? Neither, really.

Are you better at English or math? English, for sure.

What were your best subjects in school? English, History, languages.

What was your favorite subject in school? History and French.

Have you ever visited a teacher at their home? Yeah. I was friends with a girl whose dad was a teacher at our school. Our headmistress in primary also used to throw BBQ's at her house.

How many windows are in your bedroom? One.

Who was your first roommate? Kirsty.

Who was your first best friend (besides a sibling)? Lucy.

Do you have a sibling who looks like you? I don't have any siblings at all.

Name three women you know who have lost a child. Talk about insensitive -_-

Whose was the last funeral you attended or watched? I've never attended a funeral or watched one either.

What types of cancer are in your family, if any? Bowel and prostate on my dad's side. On my mum's side I think her mum had breast cancer? Maybe.

Do you have big dreams for your future? Not really. I just want to be happy and to enjoy my time.

Do you feel alone? Nah, I wouldn't say that was an emotion I really struggle with these days. I certainly have struggled with it in the past though.

What is this month’s calendar picture? I don’t have a calendar.

What is the theme of your wall calendar for this year? ...

Have you ever seen a double rainbow? Yes. Just yesterday, in fact. I saw tons of rainbows at work.

How old will you be on your next birthday? 35.

Which nationalities have you been told you look like? (i.e., Asian, Irish) I haven't really been told I look like any nationality, I don't think.

Have you ever had an outstanding library fine? Sure.

What book are you currently reading? I'm not reading anything at the moment.

Are you poor/broke right now? No. Financially we're doing pretty well.

Have you ever received any scary, threatening messages on social media? Not threatening ones, but unpleasant ones.

What is the name of your youtube channel? I don't have one.

How many subscribers do you have on youtube? Zero.

Do you wish that life were more fair? I mean, that would be nice, but I can't see it ever happening.

Who was your first kiss? A boy named James.

Do you feel you have found your soulmate yet? I don't believe in soulmates.

Are you single or in a relationship? Married.

If you’re single, do you want to be, or do you wish you weren’t? ...

Ever collected shells at the beach? Yeah, I used to do that all the time. I had quite the collection at one point but I think my dad made me chuck them when we moved house lol.

Would you rather paint or carve a pumpkin? I've never done either, but probably carve one.

Who are three of your favorite youtubers to watch? ,,,

What year did you graduate high school? 2007.

What do you miss about high school? Nothing much, hahah. I miss the school holidays and the social/free side of being a teenager but overall I'm much happier as an adult.

What do you miss about college? Again, the freedom and the lack of real responsibility.

What color was your first car? Bright red.

Do you have a car now? Yeah.

What color was the house you grew up in? Grey brick with white pannelling is the best way to describe it.

Growing up, what floor was your bedroom on? On the first floor, then we moved to a three storey house when I was eleven and I had the top floor to myself.

What is your birth order in the family? I’m an only child but the second born.

What would your name be if you were the opposite gender? Alexander.

What were you almost named? I don't think they came up with any other options.

Does your bedroom have carpet? Yes.

Best camping experience? I've never been camping before.

What are the top three travel destinations on your bucket list? Japan, Iceland and Canada (again).

Do you get heartburn? I haven't had it for ages.

What are three things you are known for in your town? Uh, being a dog walker I guess. Also being married to my husband as everyone knows him/his family. I can't think of anything else. Maybe for having a gobby beagle LOL.

What are three things you are known for on social media? Posting cats/dogs and that's about it, lol.

What is your Instagram account name? I'm not putting that here.

Have you ever used Snapchat? I used it for the filters a few years ago.

Did you want to be famous when you were younger? No. I've always hated the idea.

What show did you most want to be on as a kid? Get Your Own Back.

First celebrity you were obsessed with? Josh Hartnett.

First celebrity crush? ^^

What was your first favorite stuffed animal? A bear named Cameron and a white rabbit named Beauty. I think I still have Cameron somewhere but I have no idea what happened to Beauty.

What was something unique about you as a kid? I have autism so I guess that.

Were you ever goth/emo? Not really. Emo was kind of after my time.

Do you want any more piercings? I would happily get more but I'm not keen enough to go out of my way to get them done, if that makes sense.

How many tattoos do you have? One. Do you want more tattoos? Yeah, I'll probably get more at some point.

If you had to get a tattoo, what would you get? A pawprint.

Do you mostly write in cursive or print? Print.

Were you ever homeschooled? No. I always wanted to be, though.

Describe your dream wedding in five words. ...

Pick three animals that you think resemble you, and why? ...

Are you unique? Everyone is, in their own way.

Do you get called a free spirit? No.

What day of the week were you born on? Saturday.

How are you feeling right now? Tired, but otherwise pretty good.

#survey #surveys

0 notes