#i wanted to get a little tipsy for therapy tonight and then i had to deal with the consequences of that decision:

[sob-dylan]

I’m the passenger ending anon and I was more curious abt the last 3 minutes or so that’s all in a rosy “things are fine :)” kind of glow, it just seemed so disconnected from the rest of the movie. I LOVED bensons end scene I was eating it up Then hard cut to Things Are Ok :) Idk ! that’s why I asked bc ur no 1 passenger scholar on my dash

lol my bad, i probably should have realized that by "the ending" you meant the part that comes at the end 😅

i'll give a middling answer: it's alright. i mean, let's be honest, the passenger's strength isn't it's screenplay. there's a lot of good story in what mr. jack stanley wrote, but some of the pacing's a little bit awkward and a few things here and there don't make a ton of sense. that all kinda comes to a head in the last scene. but i don't want to throw too many stones, because i'm definitely no great writer, and i've alway found endings especially difficult. and ultimately, i do think the ending works.

even though it's a rough transition from the penultimate scene to the final scene, i appreciate that they took some time to show the positive aftereffects of randy's no good very bad day. there's a definitely a lot of information packed into that very short scene, and some of it feels cool, some of it feels weird. i'm glad that randy's standing up to his mom and going to hang out with friends. but who are these friends? did he have friends before that he just didn't mention? or did he make new ones between his kidnapping and now? his arm's still in a sling, so it feels like not that much time has passed . . . i like that he's kept in touch with ms. beard, but i hope he's doing a little more job-wise than just babysitting for her. his scene with hardy in the beginning showed us that he's in dire need of imagining a substantial future for himself. maybe he could teach! or become a librarian! i do like that they brought in ms. beard's daughter tessa, because for me the movie is all about children. it's about hurt children! and it's about how we need to do a better job of loving and helping and protecting our children! i know some people think it's pretty morbid and fucked up that randy teaches tessa the game that took her mom's eye out, but i actually think it's great that randy can accept that, yeah, it was just an accident, and he can trust himself to play this game for children without history repeating itself. and if it does, if tessa takes his eye out, then he can help her be strong and forgiving of herself like he's learned to be.

i'll admit that's it's all a little bit too tidy and saccharine. so i'm grateful that there are hints that randy's isn't totally fixed. if anything, he's got new, sexier, and possibly even worse problems. this is evidenced in three ways: he's got benson's jacket, someone was doodling a picture of two guys in a car (i've seen some people posit that randy drew the picture, but i hear that and think *jenna maroney voice* "did you draw that, randy? you might need help, because that is awful for an adult." i also think it's hilarious and sad and wonderful if randy found a way to tell tessa about him and benson and she illustrated it), and then finally we get the last shot as icing on the "oh boy this guy's gonna be fucked up forever" cake.

yes the ending is a bit clunky and perhaps even tonally out of step, but the last shot kinda made the whole movie for me. when i first saw the camera pan over to the stuffed animals and "supersoaker md50" kicked in, i SCREAMED! that was so killer! it was heart-wrenching! it was funny! and it was a good time! just like the whole movie! so yeah, the entire end scene maybe isn't all that great, but that last shot was. idk how i would have made the ending any better, so one great final shot is good enough for me.

[gleefullypolin]

Stacy's Tipsy Musing's - Colin Bridgerton Hot Takes - Part 4

Ok boys and girls, we need to have a little chat about Colin Bridgerton.

Part 2 has been out now for a couple of days and there have been a lot of hot takes to come out of the season. A LOT of hot takes. I’m going to break this down into 4 parts. 4 questions that I'm seeing really bad hot takes about Colin.

Now none of this is new, I gotta say before Season 3 aired Colin was a hot button topic anyway. He seemed to be the Bridgerton brother that lots of people love to spew hate takes on anyway. But damn I gotta say its painful seeing the Polin fandom have so many bad takes falling from their lips.

So, I figured...having a little drink tonight, sitting down for Father’s Day (Happy Father’s Day, Colin) I’d give you the opinion on some of these takes that you didn’t ask for...Mine!

Last time we talked about Colin’s entrapment statement to Pen and if he truly meant it.  Question 1, Question 2, Question 3, now lets get to Question 4:

How could Colin refuse to listen to Pen and just jump in to fix the situation with Cressida?

Colin “Hero Complex” Bridgerton to the rescue! This one is the easiest to answer because it has been coded throughout all 3 seasons to his character.

Season 1: Needed to save Marina from ruin. Even after finding out that she lied to him, tricked him, was pregnant with another man’s child, he STILL would have married her if she had told him she loved him. Like the boy had hero written on his chest and wanted to rip his shirt and fly into the sky to save her. He was the star of his own action story until it all came crashing to the ground the moment the damsel told him she didn’t love him. She thought him a foolish child.

Season 2: We have a couple of hero moments in season 2. He’s still stuck on there being a chance at redeeming himself at saving Marina, visiting her to see if she is happy, if there is anything he could have done differently for her. And once again he is told to stop living in a fairytale. The damsel is not in distress.

Our second hero moment comes in Jack Featherington. This time he gets to be the hero; he saves the ladies Featherington from his schemes. He proves him to be a fraud and runs him out of town. He has no idea that Portia is actually in on the scheme or that it has put the Featherington house into its own ruin at this point, but he rushes in to save the day without thinking ahead of anything else. Damsels in distress, Colin to the rescue.

Season 3: Ok, Pen needs to find a husband, Colin to the rescue. Balloon in Pen's path, Colin to the rescue. Pen is in danger, the Queen has advanced on her, and now Cressida is threatening. Colin does not even hear Pen the moment she speaks, all he hears is danger and he begins to act. His wife is in danger, and he will protect her. Hero mode activated. Again, Colin does not think ahead, he only thinks that his purpose is to protect. So he does not stop to listen to reason, he doesn’t hear Pen’s words or even sense, he just takes action.

The action at hand was apparently to go have a therapy session with Cressida Cowper, because that is what he did. A passionate plea with a woman who had no empathy. It was one of the best scenes however, because it was interesting to me that Colin was unable to tell Pen how he was feeling, but he opened up to Cressida and spilled his thoughts. Why? Because he did not care about her judgement, he did not care about her feelings toward him.

He admitted to feeling loss when Pen did not respond to his letters, he admitted to becoming a fraud, a shell, a person who closed himself off to feelings because he lost the person who opened him up to that piece of himself. He spoke of Pen’s treatment, he also tried to separate her once again from Lady Whistledown as if Pen was simply working for the woman and not actually the person holding the quill.

But Cressida was quick to pass her judgment, she clocked his jealousy immediately. He tried to appeal to her about love, family, fairness, and loneliness. Things he incorrectly assumed she would understand, but Colin, just like Eloise, is a sheltered Bridgerton’s who do not always understand how lucky they are, and he misjudged her reaction.

And our hero returned defeated by our villain. He faced the consequences of rushing in without listening to his wife. She thanked him for his counsel and his heart sank. Once again, the damsel did not need him. Once again, his purpose was gone.

It is only when she tells him she does not need him to be her hero, she simply needs him by her side that he understands his purpose. He doesn’t need to rush in to be her hero. He simply needs to love her. Sometimes the damsel saves herself. Colin truly is that wonderful romance hero I dream of.

Stick around for a bonus question....

I can’t believe Colin was going to just take 20,000 pounds from the Bridgerton funds, he doesn’t even have a job to take money from the family?

[dirtybitfic]

Therapy pt.3

Matt sturniolo x y/n / fem reader

Smutt, kinks, dom matt, punishments, a lot of crazy shit to do with the kinks discussed in the two therapy sessions. Lots of dirty shit honestly too much to put in the warning so … 🫦

Matts pov-

Im so worked up right now. After her saying she likes a challenge I just could not handle it anymore. I know its not appropriate to have sex with a client but fuck me with y/n I just cant control myself.

Since the first session she's been running through my mind. She is absolutely beautiful for one and the kinks she has are music to my ears whenever she reads them off. Ive had multiple dreams about the nasty depraved things I want to do to her and after tonight I don't know if we’ll be able to go back to just a therapist client relationship.

I see the way she looks at me when she thinks im not paying attention and fuck the way she bites her lip nervously after reading her kinks is so hot to me. She is such a dirty girl but hides it all under this sweet innocent persona and it drives me wild. I want to see her brake for me ... hear her begging me to let her cum and watching her unravel over and over until she's crying and begging for me to stop.

Tonight I will finally get what ive always wanted and the best part is I know she’ll let me . I don't think she caught it but when she described her type in our first session she pretty much described me perfectly. The tattoos , dark hair , blue eyes, a dark mysterious persona and not too mention her size kink.

Y/n is not super short but compared to me she looks so small and it drives me wild anytime she looks up at me when I stand in front of her . She constantly has bedroom eyes and thats one feature I love on her gorgeous little face . Im 6'4 and she's probably around 5'7 so as you can imagine the height difference is a good amount . (Ik this man’s is a cool 5’8 but we gonna act like he ain’t alright)

As she sits next to me in the car I cant help but watch her as her thighs squeeze tightly together and her breathing is slightly fast. I wonder what her gorgeous little mind is thinking knowing im taking her back home with me. I know she was tipsy when she said those words to me but drunk words are sober thoughts and im so glad she finally made it clear she is also attracted to me .

These 15 minutes need to go bye quick ... because once I get her inside this damn house she in for a very long night.

Your pov-

Your going crazy in his passenger seat your mind is running wild with possibility’s of what is going to happen.

The thought of him above me with his hand around my neck as he fucks into you so hard your crying is on a non stop loop in your mind you’ve been clenching your thighs for so long they are cramping . You’ve tried to think about anything else but every time you try every thought turns into him again. He's consuming your mind and you cant wait for him to consume every other part of you.

The fact he is in a high class b.d.s.m club also tells you a lot . All the men there are dominants of high power and class . Your mind wanders back to the two men Matt had introduced you to and honestly you feel bad that they will probably never hear from you but now that you know you can have Matt you don't even want to look at them again.

You were sonly entertaining them just incase u had to settle for the next best choice but you know Matt is going to ruin you tonight and after this there is no going back and you pray this car ride is almost over.

How much longer do we have

About 10 more minutes ... why

I just really have to pee this isn't a lie I do have to pee but we all know the real reason I wanted to know

don't worry were almost there

he sets his hand on your thigh causing your breathe to hitch , even the smallest touch from his hand has your pussy clenching and pulsing. he rubs small circles with his thumb causing you to let out a soft sigh but it came out more like a moan.

you don't try to cover it up you just keep looking out the window as the trees pass by and you finally pull up to a large black gate.

It opens when he presses a button and he slowly makes his way up the very long windy road leading up to what you can only guess is the house.

There are lights lining the road every few feet and there are old looking willow trees scattered along the sides . It's beautiful yet creepy at the same time.

The car come to a stop and you look through the front windshield at a beautiful modern gothic mansion

Wow Matt your house is just ... wow

Thank you me and my brothers have a love for gothic style architecture

god you drive my dream car and live in my dream house could you be more perfect

he laughs softly Well if you like the outside you’ll love the inside come on

you smile at him as you rush out of the car excited to see the interior of his gorgeous home

he gets out locking the car and taking your hand in his as he leads you to the front door and unlocks it letting you enter first .

you walk into the most breathe taking foyer.

Holy fuck you look around already involve with the house and this is only the entrance

im guessing you like it

LOVE it

he smiles and chuckles

wait till you see the victorian greenhouse in the back he says smiling at you leading you into the living room

God this house keeps getting better and better you say as you take in the dark interior of the living room.

I think your gonna love the kitchen come on he says leading you down a dark emerald green hallways into a large kitchen.

You're right I do love it . You guys love dark colors huh

yeah I guess so he says looking around actually realizing most of the house is black with dark accent colors.

I like it a lot even though its dark it doesn't feel depressing

yeah I agree . Okay time for the greenhouse

Oh . my .god this is beautiful . I have an entire Pinterest board for my dream house and i've always loved the idea of having a interior greenhouse but this is just beautiful you start walking around looking at all the flowers and plants they have growing around .

Yeah My brother nick loves this part of the house he actually does most of the planting and stuff

he has great taste in flowers night rider lilys are my favorite flower

He would talk your ear off for hours about all these flowers if he could

I would probably love that actually I mean this is just beautiful . Your lucky to have this in your house I hope you know that

oh I do trust me but lets go upstairs I wanna show you my favorite room

okay you say taking his hand as he leads you down another dark hallways leading to a spiral staircase .

As you reach the last step it enters into a large library

wow this is by far my favorite room

I knew you'd like it go up those stairs and look on the middle 3 shelves I think you'll like that section he says smirking

you take the staircase up and go to the shelves he told you too . You look at the books noticing they are all dark romance books . They are all hard covers and you trace them with your fingers landing on one in particular . Haunting Adeline by H.D Carlton your favorite book you've read by far.

Matt steps behind you placing his hands on your hips .

You read haunting Adeline?

multiple times . I love this book

is that what started your stalker fantasies

It didn't start it but it definitely made it 10 times worse

what did start them he asks as you traced over other books that you've read

Honestly from a young age I always had thought in my brain that someone was or could be watching me through my window . My childhood home had woods behind and around the right side so I was always paranoid someone was out there but I guess... as I grew up the idea became appealing instead of scary.

mmm you like the cat and mouse game don't you... he moves closer to you as his lips brush your earlobe you like feeling like prey being hunted by a large ... scary ... predator hmmm . Don't you ?

you moan at the feel of his hands on you and the dirty words he said too you

I asked you a question he says as one of his hands travels up to your neck gripping it and spinning you around .

Now answer it... he says in a deep husky voice

y-yes I like it

mm such a depraved little slut aren't you

you moan not knowing what to say

never being satisfied ... having to come to me he says as he steps closer making your back hit the wall of books and you have to arch your neck that his hand is still around to look up at him towering over you.(again were pretending that this man isn't 5'8 alright) Telling me all the dirty ... depraved things you crave

you moan.

im gonna give you everything you want ... and your gonna thank me over and over

Jesus Christ you moan as you feel the wetness pooling in your underwear and slightly dripping down your thigh. You've never been so aroused in your life and all you want to do is beg him to touch you

his hand that was on your hip travels under your dress and up your thigh as his long fingers reach the inner of your thigh he groans

Such a little slut . Your so turned on its running down your thigh and I haven't even touched you yet

you whine as his hand slowly inches closer to where you need hm most

your gonna have to wait... the house tour isn't over yet

oh fuck you you sigh out. You're so turned on its driving you crazy .

excuse me he says gripping your throat even tighter and grabbing your face with his other making you look at him. You whine as you feel your teeth pressing into your cheeks from his tight hold.

you might want to watch your tone with me he says staring intently in your eyes.

yes sir you bite back your words laced with attitude

he lets go of your face and yanks you by your hand after him.

You make your way into a long hallway with a couple doors on each side

He opens the first one and its a fairly large bathroom

nice bathroom okay next room

someone is eager huh he says as he leads you to the next door

this is my brother chris's room

oh nice

then he walks to the next door farther down the hall on the left

and this is my brother nicks room

do you all live on the same floor ?

no my room is on the basement level

oh ... why?

you'll see he says as he leads you to the last room.

this is chris's at home studio he says as you let go of his hand and walk around looking at all the equipment.

does he make music ?

Sometimes yeah but he's more into producing backtracks and beats and stuff

that so cool

yeah the man loves his music . Come on I wanna show you the backyard

he leads you out of the room and down another flight of stairs leading out to the backyard.

This is one of my favorite parts of the house

wow the pool is amazing

yeah its great. and its heated so you can use it all year round

damn thats nice

yeah its pretty great but come on I saved the best rooms for last

he leads you back inside the house and leads you down a dark flight of stairs to the basement level .

The stairs lead into another living room

wow its dark down here

yeah I like it dark it feels ... cozy to me

mmm you hum as you look at the dark blue couch and the nice fire place behind it.

he leads you down another long hallway to the room at the end.

This is my room he says before opening the door

mmm its dark but cozy I like it

and that is my closet over there and this is my bathroom

mm its like your own apartment down here

yeah I love my brothers a lot but I like to have my own space

I get that , do you mind if I use the bathroom real quick

not at all go ahead he says as you swiftly make your way into the bathroom closing the door behind you. You had been holding in your pee for the entire house tour.

you make your way to the toilet and finally relieve yourself with a sigh. As you sit you look around the large bathroom noticing the nice ass shower. Your mind wanders to things you'd love to do with him in that shower.

You finish up and wash your hands and make your way back out into the room .

Matt is in the middle of taking off dress shirt and you cant help but watch the way his back muscles tense as he pulls in off and sets it in a laundry hamper.

he pulls on a black sweatshirt he must have changed into his sweatpants while you were in the bathroom .

He turns around noticing you .

Feel better

yes much better. I held it in for a while

he chuckles and then walks closer to you as he bends down and lifts one of your feet you balance yourself by placing a hand on his shoulder. He takes of your heel and then the other.

You sigh feeling so much more comfortable .

Go into my closet and grab a sweatshirt I know you probably want to get out of that dress

as you make your way to the closet he slaps your ass causing you to gasp.

you smile as you make your way into the large walk in closet and finding a line of sweatshirt hung on the top rack .

you grab a grey sweatshirt and start undoing your dress as it slips off . You weren't wearing a bra under the dress so all you have under his large sweatshirt is your lace thong that is soaked with your arousal from earlier.

you walk back out and he smiles at you .

You look good in my sweatshirt

yeah its comfy too to say as you hold your arms out looking down .

its fits big on you since he's significantly taller than you.

I have a feeling I won't be getting it back anytime soon

yeahhh don't hold your breathe you say smiling back at him.

ready for the last room

mhm you smile knowing you're finally going to be getting what you want after this last room.

he leads you out of his room and down a small hall leading to a large door at the end .

I think you'll like this one he says with a smirk on his face.

he opens the door and turns on the light . Your mouth drops as you see what the room is.

A fucking sex dungeon

you walk around the room looking at all the whips and ropes that line the left wall. The right wall is adorned with blindfolds and other kind of restraints .

you still think you can handle me he says in your ear as he swiftly walks around you with his hand on your waist

you make eye contact nodding your head hoping hell finally touch you.

take the sweatshirt off he says sternly.

you slowly lift it over your head as your nipple immediately harden since this part of the house is cooler than the rest.

he groans at the sight of your bare body in front of him.

he slowly traces a hand down your face then neck and then he reaches your tits as he pulls on your nipples causing you to moan from the pain and pleasure.

he pulls on them harder making you gasp for air .

his hands move to your waist as he effortlessly picks you up and holds under your thighs to keep you up as you wrap your legs around his waist.

he brings his mouth to your neck biting and sucking leaving marks as you moan from the feeling.

you sound so beautiful he goes back into your neck leaving more marks.

your legs tighten around his waist as he bites down harshly on your shoulder

fuck you gasp as he lets go and kisses it softly

he sets you down and spins you around walking you over to the couch and bending you over the arm rest .

he bends down so his mouth is at your ear

I think you need to learn some manners hmm

you know that he's probably referring to the library when you coped an attitude with him .

all you do is shake your head yes

use your words y/n . he says in a harsh tone that has you pulsing around nothing.

yes you say sounding out of breathe .

yes what ...

yes sir

good girl

you hear him walk away but stay where he put you .

you hear him step back behind you and feel something cold run along your left ass cheek . You lay there waiting for what he's going to do .

Something slaps down on your cheek causing you to gasp . It didn't hurt but it definitely would leave a mark if he smacks harder.

you know what this is ? he asks seeing if you'll guess correctly

ummm I don't know

he smacks down the object again with more force causing your hips to buck harshly into the arm rest.

take a guess and maybe ill go easy on you

fuck umm I... a crop wip

he smacks down on your other cheek

such a smart girl

you moan at his praise as he smacks down again.

he tosses it on the couch and grabs you to stand up by your hair causing you to whine.

You have no idea what I want to do to you right now

you let out a quiet moan .

Please . Do anything you want .use me

yeah you want me to treat you like the dirty little slut you are his tone making it evident he's smirking.

yes... fuck please

he lets go of your hair and walks over to the wall of blindfolds picking up a blue satin one and walking back over to you .

turn around he says as he stands in front of you .

You do as he says and he ties it around your eyes and nots it at the back securing it tightly .

you run your hands over the silky cool material smiling .

he guides you by your waist until he pushes you down to sit on the edge of the couch your back arching into the back of the couch.

his hands move up and down your sides until he reaches your panty lines and pulls them down your legs slowly .

spread your legs for me show me how much of a mess i've made you

you spread your legs and he groans

such a pretty little pussy he says before placing soft wet kisses on your inner thighs causing you to squirm in anticipation.

his breathe hits your sensitive clit and your hips buck . You want him to finally touch you so badly you just cant help yourself .

he places a soft kiss on your clit causing you to moan .

fuck... please

tell me what you want

please I need your mouth so bad

mmm he groans before diving into your pussy as he licks and sucks .Fuck he's good at this . Your breathing is erratic as you squirm under him .

oh- my god fuck

yeah ... am I making you feel good he says before going back to sucking your clit

yes fuck so good you moan out . He starts flicking his tongue in the perfect spot that has your legs trembling.

Oh FUCK oh my god right there

he smirks against your pussy as he inserts a finger inside your gushing entrance eliciting a loud moan from you.

Oh my god fuck im so close

Cum for me sweetheart cover my mouth with it

his words immediately send you tumbling over the edge as your legs tremble and you're gasping for air .

such a good girl for me he says as you come down from your high and he pulls his finger out of you .

your catching your breathe as he licks his fingers clean.

such a sweet little pussy he groans .

get up he says in a raspy tone you immediately obey standing up and waiting for more instruction.

he walks over to the wall of restraints and ropes he picks a set and walks back over to you .He pulls off the blindfold and throws it down.

you blink adjusting to the lights then looking down at what's in his hand.

you smile and he notices.

come on he says making you walk in front of him .

he watches the way your ass moves when you walk making him even more painfully hard than he already is.

you make it back in his room and he shuts the door harshly then grabs you buy the back of the neck.

hands behind your back

you hold them behind your back and he puts the wrist restrains on securing them enough they won't slip off but not tight enough to hurt.

walk to the end of the bed

You walk slowly to the end of the bed as he trails closely behind.One you reach the end he moves your hair and tells you to hold it . He then secures the neck piece of the restraints. It holds your head at and angle that is slightly uncomfortable but you enjoy it.

He pulls his sweatshirt off and he spins you around to face him.

You look so beautiful all restrained for me

you smile up at him as your eyes trail his upper body the best they can with the restraints .

he pushes your shoulders down as he makes you sit on the edge of the bed.

he slowly unties the string of his sweatpants and slides them down and kicks them off.

Your gonna be a good girl and let me fuck that pretty little mouth

you moan in agreement.

his bulge is right in front of your face causing you to gulp. He is definitely not small and that makes you slightly nervous.

He starts pulling down his boxers causing his rock hard dick to pop out and slap you on the face. You jump not expecting it which makes him chuckle.

Open .

you open your mouth and he shoves his middle and ring finger into your mouth you gag slightly as they hit the back of your mouth and your eyes water.

mmm were gonna need to work on that he says as you gag on his finger the farther he pushes back.

He pulls them out and strokes his long thick length a couple times before looking down at you smirking.

he taps his dick on your lips telling you to open your mouth .

The second you open your mouth he slides into it and slowly thrusts in and out . His girth has the corners of your mouth stretching and your jaw hurts from how wide you have to keep your mouth open .

he grabs the back of your head and starts thrusting hard and fast. You're gagging and coughing around him causing him to groan .

Fuck look at you drooling and gagging . Such a fucking mess for me

you moan around him as tears roll down your face and spit is dripping out of the sides of your mouth and down your chin and neck. His thrust get harder his tip bruising your throat with each thrust. You're crying as your eyes get foggy from your mascara bleeding into them. You're gagging loudly as he goes deeper down your throat.

You try moving your hand to his thighs only to remember they are secured behind your back. So you try the next best thing and start trying to inch further up the bed and away from him which only seems to make him thrust more aggressively.

nahuh don't try and get away ... you said you'd be a good girl for me he grunts out horsly as his breathing is loud and curses pour out of his mouth signaling he's close.

I'm gonna fill this pretty little mouth and your gonna swallow all of it you understand he groans out as you nod your head the best you can .

he harshly thrusts a couple more times before burying himself as deep as he can go and fills your throat and mouth with his cum. He pulls out and slaps his hand over your mouth.

You better fucking swallow it. he says in a harsh tone that has your pussy gushing.

you swallow down the thick liquid furrowing your brows from the weird texture. He takes his hand off your mouth .

good girl listening so well he says before gently stroking your lips with his thumb. You hum at the soft touch and lean into it.

stand up you immediately stand up and look up at him with teary bedroom eyes.

he spins you around and bends you over the side of the bed .

He runs his hand down your back and grabs onto the chain connected to the back of the collar pulling your head back so you're looking at him. You whimper at the way the collar part tightens with the angle.

You want me to fuck you dumb he asks with a cocky smile on his face.

you nod and he slaps you on the ass with his free hand.

Use your fucking words when I ask you a question

y-yes I want you to fuck me

tell me how bad you want it ... beg for it he says making the chain a bit tighter in his hand.

p-please I want it so bad please your voice coming out broken and raspy.

mmm beg louder i wanna hear the desperation int that pretty little voice of yours

please Please fuck me I want it so bad PLEAse

mmm you sound so pretty when you beg he says as he lets go of the chain and your head falls onto the mattress .

his hand runs further down your ass to your throbbing core.

he slides a finger in causing you to whimper .

Fuck you're so wet. You like having my dick down your throat don't you

you moan in agreement causing him to slap your ass hard.

don't you he says deeply .

y-yes I love it

such a little slut he says as he adds another finger and starts moving them in and out at a pace that has your toes curling.

f-fuck oh my-

yeah you like my fingers

y-yes sir f-fuck I love them

he groans at you calling him sir and he speeds up his fingers curling them to hit the perfect spot that has your legs starting to tremble and your orgasm building at a fast pace.

oh- fuck I-im gonna cum

not until you beg for it

f-fuck oh god

don't even think about cumming without my permission he says slapping your ass as you loudly moan into the mattress.

F-fuck please can I cum fuck please please

hold it

b-but your breathing so hard as you try on focus on not cumming.

I know you can do it

fuck I- cant please let me cum fuck please

no your gonna hold it until I say you can cum

you whine in protest as your eyes swell with tears and your legs are shaking as your hands ball into fists

f-fuck I c-cant you cry out as it starts to get painful holding it back

yes you fucking can his pace gets faster and you break not being able to hold it anymore.

did you just fucking cum after I told you not too

you orgasm so hard around his fingers you don't even care he's angry you couldn't follow directions.

I t-told you I could hold it

he pulls you up by the chain causing you to gasp and cry out from the force.

he sits down and throws you over his knees.

you are going to learn to follow directions

you whine knowing he's about to make you regret that last orgasm.

his hand comes down on your ass causing you to whine

your gonna take as many spankings as I see fit and your gonna thank me for every single one

his hand comes down harshly causing your ass to sting

f-fuck thank you sir

his hand comes down on the same spot at least 15 times before you're crying and begging him to stop .

m-matt please it hurts you cry out as his hand comes down again.

im sorry who his hands come down at a fast pace hitting your stinging red cheek at least 5 times.

OW F-fuck sir please I- cant t-take anymore please im sorry I won't do it again

he rubs his hand softly over your red and raised ass cheek admiring his large hand print that is now imprinted in the skin and tracing the blood vessels that burst around the print smiling to himself.

you think you learned your lesson he asks in a softer voice.

yes sir I promise I will listen from now on you sigh out . Your ass cheek is stinging so much and your breathing is erratic from crying.

he helps you stand up before he pushes you back over the edge of the bed again . His strokes. his rock hard dick a couple times before he runs the tip through your wet folds .

he slowly pushes in causing you to hiss from the stretch he's so big that you know no matter how slow he enters you it'll hurt.

ahh shit you whine out as he pushes a little deeper.

I know sweetheart you're doing so good for me he says running his hand down the small of your back trying to sooth you.

mmm you whine as he still pushes in .

You're doing so good . Only half more to go

Thats only half you loudly cry out . You already feel so full and you don't know how you're gonna handle all of it .

he chuckles at your reaction ad he pushes deeper and deeper .

fuck you're so fucking tight .

You whine and squirm as the stinging gets worse when his thickest part enters you .

Jesus c-christ your so big you cry out as you try and calm your breathing.

I know baby but you're almost there he groans as he pushed in until he is balls deep .

you cry out as he fills you up fully with his entire length staying still letting you adjust. You knew he was big but you dint expect him to stretch you this much but you also haven't had sex in a while so its not that shocking . You've also never taken a dick this big , he's a good 9 inches and girthy as fuck.

fuck okay you can move but please go slow

he starts to slowly thrust in and out as you continue to adjust .

mmm you whine as the pain fades into pleasure

feel good he says as as he speeds up the pace ever so slightly.

y-yes sir

he groans as you pulse around him .

can you handle it if I go faster he grunts out. The slow pace is not something he enjoys. He likes to be rough and hard but he doesn't want to hurt you.

yes fuck please go faster the second these words leave your moth he starts thrusting faster . Your gasping and moaning as he hits your g- spot over and over.

h-harder fuck please sir fuck me harder

god you're such a little slut he grunts as he starts going harder and your eyes rolls to the back of your head as you feel your orgasm building.

FUCK O-OH MY GOD Y-YOU'RE SO DEEP

Yeah you liked being fuck like a dirty whore

ye-yes I love it FUCK

I can feel you pulsing around me sweetheart . You gonna cum all over my cock like the good little whore you are

Y-YES SIR. FUCK CAN I CUM P-PLEASE

yeah cum all over my cock

FUCK you scream as you cum all over him and your legs tense and shake under him .

You come down from your high as he still pounds into you as your entire body trembles under him.

MMm f-fuck you pant out as he continues pounding into you relentlessly.

so fucking wet for me he groans out as he takes a hold of the chain and yanks your head back to look up at him. Your breathing becomes scattered as the collar cuts off your air way.

You feel how deep I am hmm

you furrow your brows in pleasure but maintain eye contact and nod your head as moans slip out of your mouth.

he lets go of the chain as your head drops down and you regain a normal breathing pattern. He grabs the small chain that connects the cuffs together and starts pounding into you deeper causing you to scream out.

AHH FUCK S-SO DEEP I C-CANT

mmm you can .he grabs you by your hair and lowers himself over you so he's right by your ear , and you fucking will

he lifts off of you continuing to thrust so hard and deep your legs lift off the ground and kick the back of his thighs.

MM j-jesus christ m-matt His movements stop and pulls yanking you up by your hair causing you to cry out from the burn .

he unhooks your hands and spins you around to face him as he rebooks them in front of you.

Lay down for me he says and you climb back onto the bed laying down.He climbs back onto the bed and settles in-between your legs as he pushes them apart as far as they go and he pushes back into you .

Fuck oh m-my god you whine as he thrusts roughly into you and your eye close as the pleasure runs through you.

he slaps you causing you to wince.

look at me while I fuck you dumb

your eyes open as you moan and shake under him..

oh f-fuck im g-gonna you cry out before juices spray out of you all over his dick.

Thats it squirt all over me .Fuck your doing so good for me

you whine as your legs start to shake and you start to feel overstimulated from all the other orgasm you've had.

F-fuck I c-cant take -I-it

he grips your face tightly as he brings his face closer to yours.

well your gonna have to. Im not nearly close to being done with you he says before he lifts your legs over his shoulders and starts thrusting rougher and deeper causing a bulge to show in your stomach.

FUCK d-daddy I he cuts you off by pushing down on your stomach feeling himself in you.

call me daddy again and you'll regret it he groans out.

y-yes sir im s-sorry

He pushes down harder on the bulge in your stomach causing you to scream out as you squirt again.

Fuck keep fucking doing that your so fucking hot

mmmm f-fuck you whine as tears start streaming down your face

your entire body is shaking from the overstimulation you're feeling.

FUCK I CANT PLEASE I ... you squirt again . He has to pull out from how much is coming out.

He pushes two fingers into you causing you to scream . He curls them and moves them so fast your entire body is rocking . He hits your spot over and over until your squirting again all over his fingers and the bed.

J-jesus christ its t-too much you cry out as you they to move his hand away but failing since they are connected to the chain that isn't long enough for you to reach him.

I guess ill just have to force you take it then huh he says before replacing his fingers with his dick and fucking you so rough your seeing stars and all you can do is moan and cry .

the tears are streaming down your face as shake under him.

who's pussy is this he asks as he thrusts into you at a new angle that takes your breathe away. You want to answer him but no words are coming out of your mouth.

He slaps you across the face two times before he grips it and makes you look at him.

Whos fucking pussy is this y/n

Y-YOURS ITS YOURS FUCK you scream out as you cum all over him

that's it such a good girl he groans as you shake under him .

His thrusts don't let up if anything he starts going harder.

You're crying as whining under him unable to get words or moans out all you can do I breathe hard.

Look at you . Fucking you dumb hmm he says with a cocky smirk .

mmmmm you whine and kind of cry out as you lift your hips from the bed trying to get away from him but he grabs your hips hitting you at a different angle that has you choking on air.

so pathetic trying to run away from me he says as he grips your hips so tight there will be bruises Tommorrow.

F-f-fuck you you cry out . You're so overstimulate it hurts .

he slaps you across the face then shoves his fingers into your mouth causing you to gag and couch as he presses down your tongue.

watch your fucking mouth he says as he pulls his fingers out of your mouth and starts rubbing circles on your clit as he continues pounding into you.

MMM N-NO I CANT I-C-CANT you scream out as you feel another painful orgasm building.

oh but you will he says as he feels you pulsing around him signaling your close.

F-FUCK MMMM you scream in a horse shaky voice as your orgasm all over him so hard your entire body shakes and lifts off the bed as he continues rubbing your clit until you come down from your high as your brain goes fuzzy and your vision blurs.

your body is exhausted and your non stop shaking as he continues thrusting into you.

Fuck you gonna let me fill this pussy with my cum hmm

y-yes p-please you whine knowing that he's close brings a smile to your face you don't know how much more you can take.

yeah such a little cum slut aren't you

mmm y-yes sir you moan as his thrust get sloppy .

f-fuck he groans as he fills you up .

you lay there trying to catch your breathe as he pulls out and pulls you up unlatching the collar and handcuffs . you let out a sigh and stretch your arms since they are locked up from the position they were forced into for so long.

You okay he asks smiling softly at you .

you look at him softly smiling before climbing into his lap and holding onto him .

mmhm just... tired you say smiling against his chest. He rubs your back softly as he holds you tight.

lets go get cleaned up hmm he coos in your ear.

mmhm you sigh into his chest but don't have the energy to move.

he stands up holding you as walks to the bathroom and sets you down on the toilet letting you pee as he starts the shower .

once you finish your business he picks you up and walks you both into the shower and under the water.

you sigh as the water runs over your exhausted body . He slowly sets you down but still holds you tight knowing your legs are not very stable right now. He grabs some body wash and doors it all over your body before rubbing it in and letting in rinse away . You wash his torso and then rubs it all over his back then he rinses it off.

You smile to yourself feeling so taken care of at the moment and it makes you happy .

what you smiling about he jokes as he smiles down at you.

nothing your just... I just feel taken care of thats all

aftercare is very important to me you know that

I know its just not something i'm used to so.. thank you

of course beautiful he says as he runs his hands through your wet hair and places a kiss on your forehead.

he turns off the water and helps you step out as he wraps the large towel around you and wraps his around his waist.

you both make your way back into his room after drying off most of the water . He grabs a shirt for you to throw on and he throws on some boxers and sweat shorts .

you okay ... hungry thirsty ?

yeah both actually

alright lets go to the kitchen i'll Make something

you make your way up the two flights of stairs to the main floor and walk through the halls to the kitchen.

what time is it you ask as you reach the kitchen

4 am a voice says from further in the kitchen making you yelp and jump in surprise .

matt laughs as he makes his way over to the fridge grabbing things out as you stand there clutching you chest trying to catch your breathe.

sorry sweetheart I didn't mean to scare you the other one says as he approaches you with a small chuckle.

no no its okay just wasn't expecting anyone to be in here.

im Chris he says offering a hand for you to shake .

y/n you say with a smile as you shake his hand.

ahhh so your y/n he says smirking and looking at matt

what's that supposed to mean you ask slightly confused.

oh nothing me and nick have just heard a lot about you over the past two weeks

Oh really you ask with a smile looking at matt who's rolling his eyes.

Mhmm he says winking at you causing you to blush.

what are you doing up anyway

Couldn't sleep . I was gonna go for a swim but then I got hungry he says walking over to the fridge and pulling out a water.

he looks over to you . Want a water

oh sure thank you

You walk over to the island and sit down in one of the chairs.watching as Matt cooks . Chris comes and sits next to you placing the water down in front of you.

so y/n what do you do for work?

im a stylist you say smiling at him

ah so thats why you always have good outfits.

you smile at him from the compliment

yeah I guess so

do you like it

yeah I love it most of the time

why most of the time

well I work with celebrity's a lot and some of them are complete assholes so you know

ahh yeah I get that some of them just act so entitled

right its ridiculous . Matt said your a music producer

yeah I am its pretty cool

I bet id love to be able to make my own music

Matt smiles at you as he admires the way you get along with his brother .

do you sing?

yeah a bit

you should totally record in my studio sometime

id love that but you know thats only if Matt keeps me around

Trust me I will Matt says smirking at you making you smile

well im gonna go for a swim and then probably go to bed .

bye it was nice to formally meet you

yeah you too he says as he walks away down the hall to the pool.

so you sing Matt says smiling

yeah not but only really to myself im kinda awkward when people watch me

well maybe one day I can get you too sing for me

mmm yeah maybe

he finishes plating up the chicken and potatoes he made and slides u a plate and some silverware across the island.

you immediately cut off a piece and take a bite as he wits for your reaction.

oh my god this is so good you say as you lean back in your chair with a smile .

im glad you like it he says smiling and coming to sit next to you.

this is another reason I love older guys

food..? he asks chuckling a little bit

no like you actually cooked me something not just fell asleep and left me to fend for myself

I mean its a pretty easy thing to do he says smiling and taking a bite of his food

yeah but guys my age just arent like you

well then im glad you found me

oh trust me me too you say with a smirk .

okayyy eat your food he says laughing

you laugh a little before finishing the meal he cooked .

that was so good thank you

of course

he gets up and puts the plates in the dishwasher before coming back over to you.

you know what im craving

hmm

desert he says with a wicked smile on his face...

part four coming since I feel like this one is already way too long and took me forever to finish.

💋

[scarrbatt]

Friendly Banter⋆

Pairing!: gn!reader & Kyle ''Gaz'' Garrick

Rating!: It's pure fluff sooo

Warnings/tags!: Mentions of drinking!, tipsy reader, and tipsy Gaz, if you squint slightly jealous lieutenant ghost, Gaz flirts with the reader but they are oblivious to it, Gaz is also a gentleman bc yes, Gaz calls reader hun, love, and some other pet names, reader is a lightweight and has no filter when drunk Summary!: After a successful mission 141 has the whole weekend free, and reader decides to head into the city to check out a nice fancy restaurant that opened recently, Gaz coming with them. (oOoOo it's a date) Word count!: 996 words!

A/N!: First time writing in a looong time so beware! I know nothing about the military, so it might be wrong! don't be afraid to correct anything it's all appreciated!! (っ＾▿＾)

Long missions always ended with everyone sitting around in the living room talking about how it went, with a couple bottles of whiskey it often became some sort of therapy session for some but tonight was a bit different, the whiskey was definitely present but everyone was calm mostly chatting about anything.

Did you guys hear that a new restaurant opened downtown? heard its fancy and all. you said, nails tapping the almost empty glass in your hands, most of the team was completely unaware of most things that went down downtown never mind what new restaurants were opening up but one person did speak up The one near the fountains? yeah, heard it even has a dress code, we should go this weekend, it's not always we have a whole weekend free. The person was Gaz, he was the closest to you in age which meant you two were pretty close, you always thought he was pretty attractive but you never acted upon that thought, never wanting to make your nice little friendship into something nonexistent with such words, that didn’t stop your heart from skipping a beat at his offer. Too fancy for me, I'll stay. Soap said followed by a couple agreeing nods from the rest of the squad sitting nearby. Heh, what about we go Gaz? you and I? you said, expecting him to say no or something along those lines Oh yeah, that'd be nice! You felt your cheeks heat up, you were just friends but it still made you blush.

Some time passed after you two decided that you would go out to that fancy place, after some playful teasing from the team and some death stares from you Gaz had decided to make the reservation.

Done, tonight at 7:25 sounds alright? Gaz said, a small smile adorning his lips, you nodded excitedly Yeah sounds great. the rest of the afternoon was spent hanging out with everyone, except for Ghost who was probably hidden in his office finishing paperwork or just plain hiding from everyone else.

6:35 PM Most of the squad had already excused themselves heading to their personal quarters to sleep or just left to who knows where, but you and Gaz were still talking, not even about the date but just about anything, he was one the only people here who you could talk with for hours and not get bored. It's already six? we should get ready y/n don't wanna be late do we? Gaz said followed by a playful wink making you blush, you nodded. Y-you're right I'll go get ready see you here in a bit ya? After you both said you're goodbyes you headed to your room to shower and change. 7:00 PM

Once you had finished getting ready and had blow-dried you're hair you headed to the living room to wait for Gaz, walking into the living room you saw Ghost sitting on a chair reading a book. Oh hey L.T! You said with a small smile, the scary man looked up from his book at you. You are going out? It's late no? He said followed by a small stare as he examined your appearance. Oh yeah um, Gaz and I are going to check out a fancy restaurant that just opened up near downtown. You said fidgeting with your fingers. Hmmmm a date? before Ghost could finish his question you quickly interrupted him A-as Friends! Gaz is cute but I’m sure I'm not his type, he just invited me because he saw I wanted to go... that's all. The smile that had been on your face became a more serious one, you were one of the prettiest people gaz and for that matter, ghost had ever seen, your self-esteem or your lack thereof always made ghost confused but before Ghost could say anything else gaz walked in. Ready y/n? Gaz walked in doing that guy thing where they place their hands on your waist before they move past you he then noticed ghost, and after they exchanged a couple words you and gaz walked out, getting in gaz´s car but not before bickering over who would drive, gaz convincing you to let him drive because ''You where wearing heels it's not safe'' you rolled your eyes playfully agreeing to sit copilot for now. 7:20 PM Once you guys arrived at the restaurant, he quickly ran to open the door of your side of the car, making you chuckle. Such a gentleman huh? You said with a small playful smile I mean what can I say? it's the minimum I can do for someone so stunning as yourself Gaz said followed by a wink, your cheeks burning red. Once the two of you had walked inside and sat at your table you two had ordered some food accompanied by some wine which you gladly drank, maybe a bit too glad because soon enough you were dizzy and talking a bit too much for your own good. D'you remember that time soap was sleepwalking and fell on top of Ghost? You were talking and talking, gaz didn’t mind necessarily he loved the sound of your voice and how it sounded so cheerful even when intoxicated. Honey, what about we stop drinking...don’t want you getting hurt, do we? Gaz was joking, partially, he really didn’t want you getting hurt and less when you were out with him he would feel terrible for weeks if that happened. I’m a-alright…not even that drunk! You mumble shouted catching Gaz off guard and making him chuckle Shhhh love don’t be so loud. He said watching you pout like a little kid, he found it adorable, he found everything you did adorable, well except when you guys are on the field then he thinks you are and look badass, a bit scary but mostly badass he was quickly pulled out from his thoughts by the small whisper of words that fell from your lips. Make me Kyle.

AAAAAND THATS A WRAP

Should I make a second part!? lmk!;)

Hope you enjoyed reading!

[theladyofdeath]

Heels {Rowaelin}

The prompt: walks in front of their crush in stripper heals and a short skirt because they want their attention

Rowan x Aelin os

Written with @snelbz​

There was no way this could be a good idea.

Aelin was sitting on her bed, watching as Lysandra flicked through her closet. She had told her that tonight was the night and had recruited her to help her do what she considered nearly impossible.

She was going to get the attention of Rowan Whitethorn.

It wasn’t that he didn’t know she existed, it was quite the opposite. He was one of her friends, having met during orientation week their freshman year, and as their group grew, so did their friendship. But after three and a half years, she had very solidly gotten her stuck as just that: his friend.

“You’re wasting your time,” Aelin crooned, flipping through the timeline on her phone. 

“Bullshit,” Lysandra muttered, flipping through the clothes in her closet. “You need to feel confident, Aelin. Rowan is obsessed with you, and you’re obsessed with him. This whole thing is ridiculous.”

Aelin rolled her eyes, but remained quiet. 

“How about this?” Lysandra asked, pulling out a denim mini skirt and black halter cropped top. As Aelin was about to reply, Lysandra said, “Say nothing. Put it on.”

With a roll of her eyes, yet again, Aelin did as much. Once she had the skirt and top on, she looked in the mirror. 

And she looked hot as hell.

“Shoes?” Aelin asked, despite herself. 

“Oh, I have the perfect heels,” Lysandra said, fleeing from the room. She came back a moment later with a pair of black stilettos that were Aelin’s  size. 

Scoffing, Aelin held them up. “I’m going to break my neck.”

Lysandra snorted and flounced back into the bathroom where she continued to straighten her hair. “You’re exaggerating.”

“Fine,” Aelin amended. “I’m going to break my ankle.” She set the shoes on her bed and joined Lysandra in the bathroom to finish getting ready.

She let Lysandra curl her hair, but drew the line when she offered to do her makeup. They had very different styles when it came to that and while Lysandra looked drop dead gorgeous with her cat-eye liner and ruby red lips, Aelin would never be able to pull it off.

“Where is this party even at?” Lysandra asked, pulling her hair back into a stylish ponytail.

“Lorcan’s.” Aelin was trying to keep her hand steady as she applied the thin line of liquid eyeliner to her upper lid. “I think Elide convinced him to throw it.”

Lysandra snorted, applying her mascara.  “Sounds right. Lorcan isn’t exactly the host-type.”

Aelin grinned, tossing her eyeliner in her makeup bag. “Alright, hurry up. I want to make my entrance.”

With a roll of her eyes, Lysandra took one last look in the mirror and declared herself ready and they were off.

Lorcan’s apartment was just on the edge of campus, so the two girls walked and earned the eager glances of many as they did so.

Aelin took it as a good sign.

“Will Aedion be here tonight?” Lysandra asked, shooting a glance over at Aelin.

She groaned. “Probably.” She still couldn’t believe that her roommate actually had the hots for her cousin. He was practically her brother and the thought of him in any sort of compromising position made her want to gag. “If you hook up with him tonight, please do it at his place. I can’t afford therapy on my barista’s salary.”

“Trust me,” Lysandra said, adjusting her ponytail as they approached the steps to Lorcan’s. “I plan on giving you complete privacy at the apartment tonight. And you better take advantage of it.”

Butterflies grew in the pit of Aelin’s stomach. 

She planned to, hoped to, wanted to…but, she had to catch Rowan’s eye first - something that made her nerves go haywire. 

Lysandra must have caught it, because they stopped outside of Lorcan’s door and Lysandra made Aelin face her. 

“You look gorgeous,” she said, and brushed Aelin’s hair back. “He’d be an idiot not to come after you.”

That was the goal, after all. Aelin was not going to be the one doing the chasing. She wanted Rowan to see her, want her, not be able to take his eyes off of her. She knew he’d be here, the party was at his best friend’s apartment, knew that everyone from their friend group would show up. Yet she was absolutely fucking terrified he’d see her and have zero reaction.

She played it off with a joke though. Scoffing, she tossed her hair over a shoulder. “He’d better. I didn’t book an emergency appointment with my waxer for nothing.”

If Lysandra noticed the fake bravado — which she absolutely did, she and Aelin had become as close as sisters over the past three years — she didn’t call her out on it. Instead, she smirked, smacked Aelin on the ass, and said, “Then let’s go get your man.”

The music could be heard from a block away, and when they opened the front door, the apartment was already packed.

People definitely noticed them come in, though, including Elide who was running towards them, a drink in hand. “It’s about time you two showed up!”

“The host himself isn’t here to greet us?” Aelin mocked, giving Elide a hug.

Elide chuckled as she rolled her eyes. “He’s been out on the balcony for about a half hour, avoiding all human interaction.”

“Sounds about right,” Lysandra replied, rolling her eyes, but then she began looking around the spacious townhouse Lorcan and Elide shared. “You haven’t seen Aedion tonight, have you?”

Elide gave Aelin a knowing glance, but said, “Last I saw, he was playing beer pong with Fenrys. Don’t know who the poor bastards getting their asses handed to them were, but they’re probably still in the kitchen.”

Lysandra gave Aelin a wink. “Good luck.” And then she was gone, lost in the bodies dancing to the music.

Her part in tonight was done, to help Aelin get Rowan’s attention. It was all up to Aelin now, so Lysandra was free to find someone to occupy her own time. Even if the thought of who she’d be with made Aelin want to shudder.

Alone with Aelin, or as close to it as they could be, Elide let out a low whistle as she finally took in Aelin’s outfit. “I have a feeling that outfit isn’t just to impress me.”

“Does that mean you’re not impressed?” Aelin asked, pretending to pout. 

Elide looped her arm through Aelin’s and led her to the bar. “I’m always impressed, but I don’t think you care so much about my opinion, do you?”

Aelin snorted as she began to look around, but Elide saved her the struggle.

“He’s on the patio with Lor,” Elide said, simply. “Don’t worry. I’ll drag his ass back in here soon and Rowan will follow.”

Elide poured them both a shot, which Aelin gladly took and even asked for another. But when Manon and Asterin Blackbeak showed up, she waved Elide off to go greet her friends, and leaned against the bar, debating on a third shot.

She wasn’t trying to get shitty tonight, just a little messy, but her nerves were beginning to grow again.

Just as she decided to say fuck it, and get another shot, and heard a whistle from behind her. She turned and found Dorian Havilliard staring at her legs.

Or maybe he was staring at her ass.

They had messed around her freshman year, when his dorm room was just down the hall from hers, but it had never been anything more than that between them, and they agreed that they were better as friends. It didn’t mean they didn’t have fun though.

She smirked as she tossed the glass back and set it down on the bar top, before turning to him. “See anything you like?”

“I see quite a few things I like,” he said, raising his drink in salute. “Then again, only a fourth of your skin is covered, so there’s a lot to look at.”

Aelin laughed, quietly, and clinked her empty shot glass against his full bottle. “Gotta show off what the gods gave me.”

“As you should,” he agreed with a wink. “Haven’t seen you around in a while.”

“Well, it is school, and I actually study,” Aelin said, turning to refill her shot glass.

Dorian had the audacity to look offended. “Hey, I study, too.”

Aelin laughed as she turned back around. “Reading a bunch of books that have nothing to do with any of your classes doesn’t count as studying, Dor.”

“But they’re so much more interesting,” he replied, chuckling as he thought of the boring curriculum he studied for his pre-law degree.

Aelin rolled her eyes as she tossed back the shot and set it behind the bar. Four shots was enough. She’d be fun, she’d be confident, but she wasn’t tipsy enough to make an ass of herself.

Yet.

“I assume all of this skin isn’t for me, so who are you trying to impress?” Dorian asked, and then added, with a wink, “Chaol?”

Huffing a laugh, Aelin shook her head. “Absolutely not. That ended in a disaster and I’m not inclined to repeat it.”

The sliding glass door opened and Aelin’s eyes snapped to the door, before she quickly turned away before Lorcan and Rowan stepped inside.

“Oh,” Dorian chuckled, softly. “Whitethorn then.”

It wasn’t a question.

He had moved imperceptibly closer and she knew how it would look to Rowan. For whatever reason, she decided she wanted him to be jealous she was talking to another guy.

Even if she had no idea whether or not he’d even noticed her.

“Is this who I am now?” Dorian asked, quietly, leaning into her ear, fully aware that it looked like he was coming onto her. “Your super hot wingman?”

Aelin snorted, and didn’t bother moving away. “My overly cocky wingman, maybe.”

Dorian huffed a laugh. “I still take it as a compliment.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be flirting up Manon instead of fake flirting with me?” Aelin whispered, quietly. She glanced at Rowan, who was filling up a red solo cup.

“I like to make Manon wait,” Dorian said, running a finger up Aelin’s forearm. “She gets jealous, too, and it makes things so much more exciting in the bedroom.”

“Thanks for the image, Dor,” Aelin said, pushing away the need to roll her eyes and flick him in the nose.

He and Manon weren’t exclusively in a relationship, but everyone knew they hooked up with each other, and only each other. But, again, totally not exclusive.

“Besides,” Dorian mused, his finger skimming Aelin’s arm. “She’s busy doing body shots with Asterin. I’ll enjoy her later.”

Aelin snorted, reaching behind the bar and pulling an ice cold beer from the open cooler. She handed it to him and he opened it for her, flicking the cap in the air as if it were a coin.

He let it fall to the bar top as he leaned in to whisper in her ear one last time. “Pretty sure that’s my cue.”

She followed his gaze across the room, and found Rowan looking at her. Watching her and Dorian both.

“Have fun,” he added, before sauntering off towards the kitchen.

Rowan watched Dorian walk away to the other side of the room where he sat to watch Aedion and Fenrys continue to dominate in beer pong.

When Rowan’s eyes trailed back to Aelin, she was already watching him, a slightly-forced mischievous smile on her lips.

On the inside, she felt like she was going to puke.

He made his way across the room, pausing in front of her and slipped his free hand into his pocket. “Hey.”

“Hey, yourself,” she said, and she wasn’t sure why it sounded so breathless.

“I didn’t see you get here,” he said, taking a sip of his beer.

She did the same, fighting the urge to toss her hair over a shoulder. “You were outside.” She realized that told him she was keeping tabs on him and she quickly added. “I mean, Elide told me Lorcan was outside, so I assumed you had to be with him.”

He smirked. “Right. Well, I was. It’s a little crowded in here.” She nodded, but he went on. “However, seems like you didn’t mind when Havilliard was over here with you. Not too crowded for you, then, huh?” 

Aelin slowly lifted a golden brow. If Rowan wanted to play, she would play. “Not crowded enough for someone to be blocking your view of me with Dorian, apparently.”

A light lit up Rowan’s green eyes as his jaw twitched, suppressing a grin. “I can always count on you to manipulate my words and their meaning, Galathynius.”

Aelin’s grin was wide. “Someone has to keep you in your place, Whitethorn.” 

“And is that you?” He asked, voice low as he took a drink from his cup. “The person that’s going to keep me in my place?”

Aelin’s eyes glittered as she took another drink. It was always easy with Rowan. They could talk for hours, that witty banter, back and forth. But, that’s all that had ever happened between them: simple conversation. 

From the way she caught him watching her legs as she took a drink, though, she thought tonight may just end up as she planned.

A hell of a lot more than simple conversation.

“Want to dance?” She asked.

His eyes slowly slid up her body to meet her gaze. “You know I don’t dance, Ace.”

She took a long, slow drink from her bottle. “Not even with me?”

“Not with anyone,” he said, crossing his arms and resting a hip against the bar.

It was a miracle no one had interrupted them, but the bulk of the drinks had been set up in the kitchen.

“That’s a shame,” Aelin sighed, finishing off her beer and tossing the empty bottle in the trash can. “I would love to dance, but I don’t have anyone to dance with.”

Rowan said, “I’m sure you can find someone, especially with how you’re dressed tonight.”

She raised an eyebrow and looked at him. “And how is that?”

“Don’t get me wrong, you look drop dead fucking sexy,” he replied, without missing a beat. “I just don’t get why.”

“What do you mean?” Aelin asked.

“Why try so hard?” He asked, head cocked to the side. “Who are you trying to impress?”

Cocky bastard. She could see it in his eyes, he knew what he was doing and she hated him for it.

Hated that she loved it, anyway.

“What need would I have to impress anyone?” Aelin asked, chin raised. “I think I’m naturally perfect in every way.”

Rowan chuckled. “Then you should’ve come in your sweatpants and a tank top.”

Aelin rose a brow.

Rowan shrugged. “I think that’s when you’re sexiest.”

With that, with his cup pressed to his lips, he turned and walked away.

Aelin blinked after him, not sure she was sure she heard him right. He made his way through the people and headed back to the door leading out onto the balcony, stopping to say something to Lorcan. He waved him off and then Rowan was slipping back outside, while Aelin just started after him.

She pushed her way through the crowd, which was easier said than done when you weren’t a six-foot-four giant who mildly scared the shit out of everyone by scowling at them, but she eventually made it to the door. Sliding it open, she stepped out into the balmy night air.

“You can’t say shit like that and then just disappear,” Aelin said, finding him exactly how she’d expected to.

Rowan was leaned against the wall, the sole of one booted foot pressed against it as well. A lit cigarette dangled from his fingers. She gave him shit about smoking all the time, but knew he only did it when he drank.

Or when he had something on his mind.

He held the cigarette out to her, but she gave him a look. “You know better than to offer me that.”

Rowan just grinned and put it back between his lips. “You’re missing the party.” 

“What did you mean?” Aelin asked, standing opposite of him, leaning against the railing. 

“When?” he asked, looking up at the sky.

“Don’t bullshit me, Rowan,” she snapped, and it got his attention. 

Blowing a puff of smoke into the cool night air, he met her gaze and slowly shook his head. He gestured to her outfit, to the heels that were making her feet ache. “What is this?”

“They’re clothes,” she said. “For a party.”

“They’re Lysandra’s,” he replied, simply. 

“I can’t wear my roommate’s clothes?” Aelin scoffed. “What the hell is wrong with you tonight-.”

“Why can’t you just admit that you’re just trying to impress someone?” he interrupted, watching her, that light in his eye fading. “You’ve never been not-confident a day in your life. Whoever it is that you’re trying to impress, he obviously isn’t worth it if it causes you to be someone you’re not.”

Aelin looked down at the cropped halter top, the skirt that hardly reached her thighs, the heels that she was certain would cause blisters. “This is someone I’m not?”

Rowan slowly shook his head. “Last time we went out, you wore that little golden slip dress….” He shook his head, reminiscing on the memory. “That was you. You wore sneakers and you were still barefoot halfway through the night, dancing on the patio. What you’re wearing now - yeah, you look gorgeous - but I can tell you’re not comfortable in it.” 

“If I’m trying to get someone’s attention, maybe my usual isn’t best. Especially if it pushes me out of my comfort zone,” she snapped back, her hands on her hips. “And why is it such a problem if I’m trying to impress someone? Dorian was impressed.”

“Dorian doesn’t drool all over you like a dog in heat,” he replied. “He respects you, regardless of what you’re wearing, how much skin you’re showing off. But if you’re trying to impress some D bag who will only notice you if you’re dressed like that, you might want to reconsider.”

“And what if I was trying to impress you?” She asked, getting in his face, cigarette smoke and whiskey breath be damned. “What if I was trying to get your attention, Rowan?”

His jaw locked and his eyes searched hers, as if he was trying to find the underlying meaning in what she was saying, even if there wasn’t one. 

“Then you’d be wasting your time,” he said, at last.

It felt like a knife had been shoved into Aelin’s ribs with every word that had come out of his mouth. Begging herself not to cry in front of him, she went to take a step away, but Rowan grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to him.

Their chests were nearly touching, and his hand trailed from her wrist, into her hand, interlocking his fingers with hers.

He took the cigarette from his lips and said, “You’d be wasting your time because you impress me every time that I’m around you.”

“You never act like it,” she breathed, shaking her head. “You never do anything, and you’ve never tried to make a move. What the hell else was I supposed to do?”

He flicked the cigarette over the rail and let go of her hand, only to frame her face with both of his. “This.”

And then his lips were on hers, and Aelin didn’t care that she could taste residual smoke or stale beer. She knew she didn’t taste much better. All that mattered was that Rowan was kissing her and his hands were on her face and hers were tangled up in his shirt. His tongue slid against hers and she had to fight to stop the moan that threatened to slip out of her.

He pulled back, resting his forehead against hers. “That,” he said, breathlessly. “That is what you should have done to get my attention.”

Aelin swallowed, harshly. “Do it again.”

Rowan didn’t have to be convinced. His hands slid down her back as he brought his mouth to hers, and he pulled her body uptight against his. They stayed out there for a long time, for hours, uninterrupted. 

At one point, she saw Dorian come by and lock the balcony door, so everyone else would get the hint to stay the hell away.

Wingman of the year.

They stayed on the balcony, kissing and laughing and kissing some more, until the party wound down. Around two, Lorcan let them inside, and Aelin pulled Rowan out of the apartment and across campus to her own. 

True to Lysandra’s word, she was nowhere to be found.

The second Aelin stepped into her apartment, she kicked off her heels and was swept into Rowan’s arms. He carried her into her bedroom, where he stripped her down, out of her roommate’s clothes.

Rowan Whitethorn saw all of her.

She had his full attention. 

[plaidbooks]

Liquid Courage

A/N: Okay, so, this Sonny Carisi x reader fic was literally just an excuse to write drunk!Sonny. Idk how it got so long, but here we are. My headcanon is that Sonny is...touch starved is the wrong adjective. Affectionate? Touchy? Something. Hope y'all enjoy!

Tags: SVU talk, alcohol mention

Words: 3270

Taglist: @witches-unruly-heart @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @stardust-fray @permanentlydizzy @infiniteoddball @ben-c-group-therapy @glowingmess @whimsicallymad @storiesofsvu @lv7867 @cycat4077 @barbasimp @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @reading--mermaid @glimmerglittergirl @alwaysachorusgirl @detective-giggles @crowleysqueenofhell @dreamlover31

You were standing in the vast hallways of the courthouse, waiting to hear if your testimony helped at all. You were a Medical Examiner for the Manhattan NYPD, meaning you couldn’t tailor your statements like the detectives or victims could; you only spoke about the facts. And the facts were simple; with the injuries the deceased sustained, they died from asphyxiation. Could it have been caused by their husband wrapping a soft material around their throat? Of course. Could it also have been caused by the victim hanging herself in her room? Yes, it could. The same could be said for a thousand other scenarios. The difference was the husband was found to be abusive, and it was highly suspected that he killed her. But that was the detective’s job. Yours was to give them the facts. Did you want the sick fuck behind bars? Of course, but that wasn’t what you were called for—no opinions, just facts.

The SVU squad caught up with you quickly; Olivia, Amanda, Fin, and Sonny. You adverted your eyes when you saw Sonny; you had a crush on him, though you were only friends. At first, you were just the ME, hardly talking to him…or any of the squad, really, outside of work-related things. But he was charming and made it a point to talk to you every time he visited about, well, everything. Soon enough, you knew all about his family, and he knew about yours. He even invited you over for game night with the squad a few times.

“Jury back yet?” you asked as they got closer. You asked Olivia, but your eyes darted to Sonny a few times, your cheeks burning. He, of course, decided to stand right next to you, close enough to touch.

“Not yet; it’s only been a few hours—” Olivia was cut off as her phone pinged. She pulled it out of her pocket, glancing at the screen. “Never mind; jury’s back now.” You followed them to the courtroom, and congratulated them all, including Barba, when the jury came back with a guilty conviction.

“Celebratory drinks?” Amanda asked, grinning. Everyone agreed with that…except for you.

Sonny looked to you expectantly, but you shook your head. “I’d love to, but I’d rather decompress at home,” you replied, smiling sheepishly.

The detectives all nodded in understanding. Sonny patted your arm lightly, muttering a, “you’ll be missed. See ya on Monday,” before following his coworkers. You trailed behind before splitting from the group, heading home while they headed in the direction of Forlini’s.

*****************

You were at home, reading a book while soft piano music played softly on your speakers. You jumped as your phone rang. Looking at the id, you cocked an eyebrow. Sonny was calling you?

“Hey, Sonny; everything okay?” you asked as you answered.

There was loud music playing and voices before Sonny’s voice overpowered them all. “Heyyyy doll! I hope you’re doing okaaaay.”

Oh god, he was drunk. You let out a little huff of laughter, shaking your head. “I’m doing just fine, Son. How’re you?”

“I-I miss you,” he hiccupped, and your cheeks burned. “I wanted to l-let you know….” He pulled away from the phone for a moment, talking to someone before he was back. “I app-appreciate all you do, and I-I looooove youuuu~.” He dragged out the last two words, saying them in a sing-song voice.

Your heart leapt into your throat. He was obviously drunk; he didn’t mean it like that…or did he? “Do you need me to come pick you up?” you asked, concerned.

Sonny’s words all melded together and you couldn’t understand what he was saying anymore.

“Okay, I’ll be right there. Stay. There,” you ordered, pulling your shoes on. At least he was with his squad. He slurred something else unintelligible before hanging up, and you rolled your eyes, a small grin on your lips.

********************

You made it to Forlini’s in record time, glancing around at the patrons, looking for the lanky detective. He wasn’t too hard to find; in the corner of the bar was the whole SVU squad, and Sonny was loud. He was laughing at something, pounding his hand on the table, his head thrown back as he guffawed. Picking out a path towards him, you weaved through the crowded bar feeling completely out-of-place in your sweats and loose shirt.

Once close enough, you reached a hand out, laying your hand on Sonny’s elbow. He jumped, whipping around to look at you and almost falling off his seat in the process. His cheeks were rosy, and he had the widest grin on his face as his watery eyes focused on you.

“You came! Can I b-buy you a drink?” Sonny asked loudly, his voice carrying over the rest of the cacophony in the bar.

You gave him a soft smile. “Actually, I think it’s time to take you home, Son,” you replied. The rest of the squad seemed to be in various states of sober or tipsy, but Sonny was obviously the one that was gone. He didn’t object as you helped him stand, waving a goodbye to the rest of the squad, and pulling him through the bar.

“Guys! The hot ME is taking me home!” Sonny yelled, and you ducked your head, your face on fire. Other drunks in the bar congratulated him, and you as well, as you made your way through the throng. You just wrapped an arm tighter around Sonny’s waist, pulling him towards the exit.

Once outside, Sonny wrapped his arms around your midsection, pulling you close to him. “Have I told you how much I love you?” he asked, resting his head on top of yours.

“You may have mentioned it on the phone,” you commented, trying to drag him towards your car.

Sonny was having trouble walking straight, mostly because he was trying to wrap himself around you. “I mean it, d-doll. You’re so fuckin’ smm-art and pretty and funny and cute and beautiful…” he trailed off, leaning almost completely on you now, his weight crushing you.

“Uh huh,” you replied, smiling despite yourself. You knew he was only saying this because he was drunk; sober-Sonny would never be like this. It left a pang of sadness in your heart, because you really did like him. But come tomorrow, he’d remember none of it, and life would go back to normal.

You made it to your car and deposited him in the passenger seat, buckling him in. Sonny attempted to get out, but the seatbelt held him down. He seemed confused, pulling at the material across his chest as you slid into the driver’s seat. You cracked his window so that he’d get some fresh air and pulled away from the curb. You knew where he lived, so you headed in that direction.

“Love you,” Sonny muttered, his eyes glued to your face. You smiled, ignoring the fluttering those words made burst forth. Only in your wildest dreams did Sonny say those words to you, but he’s said it so much tonight...at least it would fuel some late night fantasies. You jumped as his hand connected gently with your head. You were about to ask what he was doing until you realized; he was petting your hair.

“So soft…” he breathed, his fingers twining through the strands of hair. Your breathing hitched slightly, and you tried to focus on the road.

“Is there a reason you’re petting me?” you asked, chuckling lightly.

“Cause your hair is so soft, so pretty…feels so nice,” Sonny replied. You were thankfully getting close to his place when you noticed him moving; it seemed like he was trying to fight the seatbelt, but couldn’t quite figure it out.

“What are you doing?” you asked, alarmed.

Sonny grunted against the impossible belt holding him down. “Wanna cuddle. Wanna hold you.” He said it almost angrily, but that was directed more at the damned seatbelt holding him from you.

“Sonny, stop struggling; wait until we’re not in the car,” you instructed. He let out a huff of defeat, sinking into the seat grumpily before dissolving into giggles.

You pulled up in front of his apartment complex shortly after. As you got out and came around to his side, you let out a chuckle, watching Sonny fight and lose against the seatbelt. You hurried to open his door, leaning across him, and clicking his seatbelt off.

“Freedom!” Sonny cheered as you helped him out of the car. Though, now free of the car, nothing stopped him from draping his body over yours, leaning over your back.

“Sonny, this isn’t helpful—” you started before he cut you off.

“Mmm cuddles,” he murmured, his voice directly in your ear, slurring even worse than before.

You struggled under his weight as he forced more of himself on you, wrapping his arms completely around your torso and arms, leaning almost completely on top of you, forcing you to bend forwards under his weight. “S-Sonny…I need you to walk with me, man,” you huffed, trying to take the few steps into his building.

“Can we cuddle, though?” Sonny asked, wrapping a leg around your waist.

You had to stop walking, spreading your legs so that he didn’t completely throw you off balance. “Oh my god; yes, we can cuddle. But let’s get inside first.”

Reluctantly, he peeled himself off you…mostly. He kept his arms around you as you tried to hurry to his door, before he changed his mind and rewrapped around you.

“Keys?” you asked as you made it to his apartment.

Sonny seemed barely conscious at this point, leaning fully on you again, but from the side this time. You had to lean partly against the wall to keep from falling. “You’rrrrre prettyyy,” he hummed in your ear.

“Yes, thank you. Where’s your keys?” you repeated. Sonny swayed on his feet, blinking slowly, showing no signs of hearing you. You sighed, reaching into his pockets, searching for any kind of jingling. You found his phone and wallet easily enough before your fingers closed around his keyring.

As you pulled your hand out of his pants pocket, he said in a low voice, “I like when you touch me.”

Heat rushed to your face, and you ignored him, as well as the rush of arousal you felt, and unlocked the door. “Come on,” you grunted, dragging him over the threshold. You half led, half carried Sonny back to his bedroom. Once his bed was in sight, Sonny extracted himself from you, moving to collapse onto the mattress, face-first and laying diagonally across it, legs dangling off the side. Bending down, you were able to get his shoes off quickly before he rolled onto his back.

He reached out for you, muttering, “cuddles” over and over again as you shook your head at him.

“Hold on, Son. Let me go to the bathroom really quick,” you lied. You had no intentions of cuddling with him, nervous about what he may do. Sonny was a good guy, but alcohol was a hell of a drug.

He nodded to you, letting his arms fall to his sides. You quickly leaned over him, loosening his tie and pulling it off. “Be right back,” you said, leaving his room and closing the door behind you.

Searching in his kitchen, you quickly found glasses. You filled one with water before heading back towards his room. You debated finding food for him, but water seemed more important right now. That is, until you opened his bedroom door and found him passed out. Sighing once more, you deposited the glass on his nightstand, then reached into his pockets, pulling out his wallet and phone. His charger was laying on the floor by the nightstand, and you plugged in his phone while he snored loudly. Then, as gently as you could, you lifted his legs and pulled them to the bed, angling him so that his head was on the pillows…more or less.

Shaking your head slightly and fighting a smile, you crept out of his room, letting him sleep it off. You wondered if you should just go home, but you were worried about him; he had gotten pretty drunk. Making your way back to the kitchen, you glanced in his fridge. He kept it well-stocked, and you vaguely remembered him telling you he liked to cook. Nodding to yourself, you went to the couch in the living room, making yourself comfortable, and falling asleep quickly.

********************

You awoke early in the morning. The apartment was silent, and you stretched before getting up. After splashing some water in your face while in the bathroom, you made your way to the kitchen. You took out the eggs, bacon, sausage, mushrooms, cheese, and salsa you had found the previous night. You weren’t a whiz in the kitchen, but you could make an omelet easily enough. Searching through cabinets for pans, you also found a cheese grater. You glanced at the potatoes in a basket on the counter, deciding to add some hash browns to the mix. Greasy food was the best for hangovers. Finding the pans, you started grating the potatoes, letting them cook a bit before starting on the meat.

There was a beep behind you, and you jumped before you realized it was the automatic coffeemaker. You searched until you found mugs, then made yourself a cup as you cooked. Once the meat and potatoes were done, you turned everything to low, waiting for Sonny to wake up. Eggs don’t take much to cook, and you could make them as he showered or drank coffee.

As if your thoughts summoned him, you could hear Sonny shuffling about in his room. The door slowly opened, and a very disgruntled-looking Sonny stumbled out of his room. Since waking, he had stripped down to his boxers and undershirt, making your cheeks burn. His eyes were barely open, and his hair hung limply on his face as he rubbed his head.

When he caught you in his kitchen, he froze, eyes going wide. “Wh-what are you doing here?” he muttered. His eyes traveled over the various pans on the stove before coming back to your face. “Wait…please tell me we didn’t….”

“N-no! I just gave you a ride home last night, then slept on your couch to make sure you didn’t die from alcohol poisoning,” you explained. Though, you were slightly disappointed with how upset he seemed about potentially sleeping with you.

Sonny nodded, moving to make himself a cup of coffee. “And the breakfast is just a bonus?”

“I figured you’d need the help. You were pretty…fucked up last night,” you smiled, and he groaned.

“Please tell me I didn’t do anything too embarrassing,” he mumbled as you cracked the eggs into the pan.

You salted and peppered the eggs, then moved to poke at the hash browns, making sure they weren’t sticking to the pan. “I wasn’t there at the bar, so you’d have to ask your squad for that story. But, uh, I did watch you lose a fight to a seatbelt.”

“Fucking fantastic,” he replied, letting out a soft chuckle. He came over to you as you flipped the eggs, watching you work. “That it? Nothing else? Because I did wake up fully clothed, minus shoes and a tie.”

Your cheeks burned and you kept your eyes on the eggs as you put the mushrooms on top. “I’ve learned you really want cuddles when drunk…and that you think my hair is soft.” You didn’t dare look at him as you sprinkled some cheese on the mushrooms, then folded half the eggs on top of it. You plated the omelet, pouring some salsa on top and adding more cheese. “The tie just seemed like a safety precaution.”

You kept your eyes on the food, even as you felt Sonny staring at you. Once you had scooped hash browns, sausage, and bacon onto the plate, you chanced a glance at him, offering him the plate. Sonny’s eyes bored into yours, holding you there for what seemed like forever before he took the plate from you.

“Thank you,” he murmured.

You gave him a small smile. “Anytime,” you breathed back. Sonny moved to a free spot on the counter, taking small bites of food. But his eyes went wide as he tasted it, and he started shoveling food into his mouth. Grinning, you scooped the rest of the food onto another plate before moving to soak the pans.

You ate in silence, pausing only to drink coffee. Having less food, you finished first, then moved to start doing the dishes.

“No, no. You made this amazing food; I’ll do dishes,” Sonny said, swallowing hard.

You shook your head. “It’s fine, Son; I made a mess of your kitchen. I’ll clean it—”

“Like hell you will. First, you made sure I made it home safe. Second, you stayed the night to make sure I didn’t die. And third, you made me the best breakfast I’ve had in a long time—I swear my hangover is gone. You are not doing dishes.”

You smirked. “Okay fine, you win.” Instead, you finished your coffee, rinsing the mug out in the sink. Sonny continued eating, and you felt awkward standing in his kitchen. “So…I guess I’ll see you at work?” you said as a way of goodbye. You grabbed your phone off the counter, slowly making your way to his door.

“Wait!” Sonny called out, following you out of the kitchen. You cocked an eyebrow at him, and he shifted on his feet. “I-I feel like I should give you a better thank you for all you’ve done for me.”

“It’s fine, Sonny, really. That’s what friends are for, right?” you shrugged.

Sonny seemed to fight with himself for a moment before he muttered, barely audible for you to hear, “what if…I don’t want to be just friends?”

“What?” you asked, your heart racing. He wasn’t drunk anymore, and if what he was saying was true….

He came closer to you. “What if I don’t want to be just friends?” he repeated. “It seems like…drunk me was at least trying to flirt with you…. Something sober me is too damn nervous to even attempt.” When you still didn’t respond, he let out a huff. “What I mean is, I-I like you…a lot. And I’d, uh, I’d like to get to know you better?”

“You’re not still drunk, are you?” you asked, half-joking. Sonny shook his head, eyes wide. “Okay, good. Because you kinda did profess your love to me last night…but I was afraid that it was only because you were drunk.”

Sonny ran a hand over his face. “Did I really? I’m…so sorry if I made you uncomfortable—”

“No, it’s fine, really. I, uh…I’ve liked you for a while now. I was just worried that it was your drunk self that liked me, and not, uh, you,” you explained.

Sonny smiled sarcastically. “Drunk me says what sober me is thinking…most of the time.” He rubbed his neck anxiously. “So, uh, can we go on a date? No alcohol, I promise.”

You chuckled. “I’d like that. You obviously have my number—call me?”

“Of course. Let me clean up here—myself as well as the sink—and then I’ll give you a call,” Sonny grinned genuinely this time, and you melted.

“Sounds good. Talk to you soon.” You made your way out of his apartment, giving him a small wave. As he closed the door behind you, you broke out in a wide grin, excited for a date with Detective Carisi.

[misslilli]

Felix Felicis

MSR. AU. PG-13. | tagging @today-in-fic | read on AO3

Chapter 21 - The Halloween Fair

[ DS ]

On the afternoon of the Halloween fair, I take out the costume that Miss Hannigan picked out for me from the closet. Ever since I’ve got it, I’m beyond excited to wear it. It’s a black low-cut shirt, a white, checkered suit with a blazer that ties at the waist and a flaring skirt. As I put on the blonde wig and the black beret, I turn to the mirror channeling my best inner Faye Dunaway and say to myself in a breathy, southern lilt: “My, my, don’t you just look dandy, Miss Bonnie Parker!”

My friends have been roped into manning the booths of the fair and somehow, I’ve slipped under the town people’s radars, which leaves me able to roam around the fair, albeit alone. Since I’ve known most people in this town ever since I was little, I’m never actually alone at these happenings, people tend to just pull me into their conversation as I walk by. But as luck will have it, as I’m rounding one of the booths of the fair, I find myself face to face with the one person I had secretly hoped to see.

He’s wearing a brown tweed suit with a matching waistcoat and over the white collared shirt he’s tied an emerald green tie. Perched on his head is a white fedora. ‘Shit. He’s Clyde. What the fuck?’

We stop in our tracks and stare at each other for a moment, taking in our respective costumes. He’s the first one to regain his ability to speak.

“Hey Bonnie, the laws are outside, they’re blockin’ the driveway!” His Warren Beatty impression is perfect right down to the Texan drawl. ‘God help me…’

“Gosh, I hope you’ve parked the getaway car around the corner, Clyde!” I’m putting on my best Faye Dunaway impression again as I add a wink to my statement and just continue to walk past him. My heart thumping hard against my chest betrays my cool exterior, but that’s my secret and my secret alone.

----------

[ FM ]

When we finally get to the Halloween fair that Felix has roped me into, dressed up in a costume I didn’t even pick myself. We trail the grounds together and we’re drawn to the candy apple booth. Well actually, Felix draws us to this exact booth, the little sneak, but I can’t resist his pout and pleading eyes, so we end up getting an apple each. Munching away happily, his mouth full, he asks the question I’ve been too scared to ask myself: “Hey dad, do you think Miss Scully is here too with her friends?” I hope she is, if only to see what kind of costume she has picked out for herself, but I can’t tell Felix that. Instead, I just shrug and we continue our stroll across the town square.

When we round another booth, we both stop in our tracks as we see a blonde woman appear before us , dressed in a checkered suit and a beret on her head. ‘Bonnie. She’s the freakin’ Bonnie to your Clyde. Your sidekick. No, your partner in crime. The woman you love. In the movie of course. Insert awkward cough.’.

Felix is oblivious of course, he hasn’t seen the movies and I doubt he even knows what my costume is, let alone Miss Scully’s. I scrape together the last braincells that are left in my head and a stupid movie quote is the only thing I can think of at this moment.

“Hey Bonnie, the laws are outside, they’re blockin’ the driveway!” The retort she gives me combined with her wink render me speechless until she’s well past me and Felix, mingling with the small crowd that welcomes her into their midst just a few feet away from us.

Felix does the thing I wish I could bring myself to do, staring at her retreating form in wonder and he also speaks the words that have sprung to my own mind.

“Wow!”

----------

[ DS ]

Countless conversations later and a little tipsy on the delicious apple cider they always serve at the Halloween fair, I wander along the booths when I hear a voice I haven’t heard in over a year. And could’ve gone forever not hearing again. It’s my ex-whatever Steve, talking to one of his friends.

I’m hidden pretty well in the crowd of people due to my shortness but I can still catch flashes of their conversation. When I hear my name, I stop, straining my ears.

“Dana? Oh God, no. She’s not even close to being a serious contender for a relationship.” I wince at his statement as well as the tone of his voice. “She’s just always there, you know? Like a well trained Golden Retriever, I say the word and she comes running. Such an easy lay!” When they share a laugh I can feel the flush of shame and anger crawl up my neck.

The situation he describes is exactly what I’ve spent countless hours in therapy getting over. But what he says next really drives a stake through my heart. “It’s so pathetic, but if it’s what I have to do to get laid, whatever. She’s even dirtier in bed than any hot teacher fantasy you could ever imagine and what they say about good Catholic girls is very, very accurate, if you know what I mean!”

If he weren’t the demon I have to face every time I try to get over my past, I would’ve revealed myself and give his ass a good kicking for talking about me the way he has. But not knowing how I’ll react to being face-to-face with him, I stay hidden behind a group of mummies and zombies like a fucking coward.

I’m so furious with him and myself for not being able to stand up to him. Where the hell are my friends when I need them? I haven’t seen them all evening and I could really use their company to talk some sense into me. Since they’re nowhere to be found, I head towards the bar set up in the back and slide onto a stool, ordering a shot of Tequila. ‘Fuck it! That low-life is not even worth your time of day!’

On the surface, I’m so angry I want to set this whole damn place on fire, but deep down, the past hurt resurfaces to join the hurt from his words I just heard.

By the time I’ve downed my second shot, I’ve repeated the mantra that I’m a strong woman who’s better off without men in my head about a thousand times. I see someone slide onto the stool next to me out of the corner of my eye as I order another shot of Tequila to keep the two empty glasses in front of me company.

“A third shot of Tequila is just asking for trouble, if you ask me.” I turn my head slowly towards my bar-mate to tell him exactly where to shove his smart-ass remark when I’m faced with my supposed partner in crime, the charming one with the disarmingly innocent smile on his stupid face. I’m staring him down defiantly, my eyes never leaving his while the bartender places my glass in front of me and I grab it, downing it in a swift motion, daring him in my mind to say anything else. He doesn’t comment, good for him, and orders a shot for himself, just raising his glass silently and I clink it with my empty one – I’m tipsy, not insane, chasing one shot with another.

We’re staring straight ahead during our conversation, turning our glasses over and over between our fingers.

“Which guy seems to be the problem and how many rounds of ammo do I need to take him out?,” he asks after minutes of silence. I want to lean into him for just assuming that it’s a man that has me sitting here seething, but unfortunately, he’s right. This one time.

“How many rounds you got?” He scoffs at that.

“Plenty. And I know of exactly eleven ways to get rid of a body without raising suspicion.”

“And here I was thinking the FBI frowned upon their employees giving out top-level secrets on how to hide away evidence of a crime committed.”

“I’m not going to tell you, I wouldn’t want you to be held in contempt of Congress when questioned.”

“How do you know I wouldn’t rat you out when questioned by Congress?”

“Just a hunch… Talk to me, Red. What happened tonight?” He turns towards me and I can feel his gaze dancing over the skin of my face.

“You really want to know? Well, turns out the asshole of an ex of mine decided that today might be the perfect time to make an encore appearance in my life and reminded me again why I should’ve kicked him to the curb a long time ago instead of hoping I could change him.” Looking down at the bar, I trace my finger through the condensation drops, my anger slowly dissipating and my voice growing more and more quiet. “I heard him say some pretty awful things about me tonight.”

I relax into his hand when he places it comfortingly on my back, right between my shoulder blades, and huff out a sigh. “I’m sorry.,” is the only thing he says, but doesn’t add anything else, giving me the choice if I wanted to elaborate or not.

“What I witnessed today was the way he’s always been but I just couldn’t see through the masquerade of the sweet guy, he was so kind and said all the right things and he quite literally wooed the pants off me from the get-go.”

“Love bombing.” ‘Oh yeah, I forgot, you’re a profiler. You probably already got one worked out for me, trust-issues, anxious attachment style, possibly daddy issues, in short, a hot mess. Avoid at all costs.’

“Pretty much, yeah. And I was stupid enough to believe it.” I raise my hand to call over the bartender for another round.

“You’re not stupid. It’s hard to tell the difference between genuine interest and love bombing in the beginning.” ‘Yeah, no shit Sherlock. It’s exactly why I’m sitting here torn between wanting you to make a pass at me and being absolutely terrified that you actually will.’

“How about we pass on the shots and get some water instead before calling it a night?”

“I think that’s probably a good idea, Mr. Mulder!”

“You know, after tonight, what do you say we just drop the Mister?” I nods slowly, pursing my lips.

“So just Fox?” He makes a pained face.

“No, please don’t. Just Mulder is fine.”

“Mh-hm. I guess since we’re dropping the titles, that that makes me Scully? Little odd, but alright!”

We get the check and argue back and forth about who gets to pay, him putting an end to it with a firm “Will you give it a rest, you’ll get to pick up the next check!”.

In my attempt to slide off the barstool gracefully despite three tequila shots, my heel catches onto the rail at the bottom and I stumble over the stool, knocking it over in the process. I have only his quick reflexes to thank that I don’t follow suit, his arms catching me around my waist and pulling me upright again.

He has the audacity to laugh, the bastard, and I’m beyond mortified. “Easy there, partner! Do you need a ride home? Felix is at a pajama party at his friend Suzie’s house, so I’m free to be your pumpkin carriage for tonight.” ‘NO! Yes? No. Get your hands off me. Don’t let go just yet.’

I’m so confused at the tug of war in my fuzzy head but I hate getting a cab alone and I’m in heels on top of being tipsy, I don’t want to walk home alone at night.

As we walk out, his hand finds his way to the small of my back guiding me through the crowds while making sure I don’t stumble again.

On the drive to the beach house, I manage not to fall asleep despite how tired I feel, too afraid of snoring or, God forbid, drooling onto myself. His hands find my back again guiding me up the stairs to the front door and I turn to face him at the top, even more nervous.

“Thanks for the ride, Mulder. And for listening.”

“Anytime, Scully. Good night!”

When he leans in, I start to panic that this is it and I think it shows on my face, because he only kisses my cheek, just like I did after the birthday party before getting back in the car and heading home. I can’t decide if I’m relieved or disappointed.

I can’t ignore the flutter of excitement every time his hands land anywhere on my body but what I will absolutely deny, even to myself, is the way my heart constricts in my chest when he gazes at me that way and the sense of comfort that settles over me when we’re together.

Bodily reactions I can deal with, it’s when it comes to emotions is where it gets scary.

I just don’t think my heart can survive another Steve.

[nightowlfandom]

Min Yoongi- Sweet Therapy

So one of you messaged me saying you needed a pick-me-up. Girl I got you! Hope this boosts your mood chica.

And yes I was totally jamming out to Ryuji Imaichi’s song “Sweet Therapy” (If you wanna get your thot on, listen to that song I swear- That man’s voice is like warmed honey on cold skin...)

CHECKOUT MY MASTERLIST/PROMPT LIST HERE!!!

Leggo!

...

You walked out the front door, slinging your bag over your shoulder. You let it swing shut as you stepped down. You’ve had enough with the outside world for the week and you just wanted to be alone with the only other person you cared about and that person just so happened to seem like the only person who cared about you.

But then again, you can’t choose your family, right?

You saw Yoongi leaned up against his car. He was staring looking down at his phone while he waited for you. He had no interest in talking to anyone other than you and knocking on the door put that at a huge risk. He’d probably be arrested if someone other than you answered. He wouldn’t go to jail over something as stupid as one of your siblings looking at him to wrong way, but it was tempting as hell.

 The second he looked up, he walked towards you. The somber look on your face told him all he needed to know. He met you halfway in the parking lot. He wasted no time in grabbing your free arm and pulling you to his chest. You squeezed your eyes shut to refrain from crying. You didn’t want to let them linger in your head anymore than they already have. Yoongi however, was no idiot. He could see the tears form before you even tried to blink them back. Luckily you were able to remain silent. He gently scratched the back of your head with his fingertips.

“Hey.” he finally greeted, stepping back from you. He kissed your forehead then grabbed your overnight bag that had a shirt sleeve hanging out of the side zipper. He could only smile at your half-effort. “Home alone today?”

“Mhm.” you nodded, letting him take the heavy duffel from you.

“Good.” he grumbled. “I don’t want to have to put up with those fuckers today. I’m in a real good mood.” he could feel his blood boiling at the thought of even speaking to one of the assholes you lived with. “You gonna kiss me, or what?” he smiled cheekily at your shyness. 

You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks. He was always like this when he came over to get you. You stood on your tip toes and gently bought your lips to his. He used his free arm and hooked it around your waist. He kissed you back with a hunger you could only read as ‘horny bastard’. When he pulled away, he saw the corners of your mouth turn up a little. Good, this mission was turning into a success already. 

“Come on.” he began walking you to his car. “We’re goin’ out tonight.” 

“Where?” you spoke real words for the first time since you stepped outside.

“I was thinking somewhere where we could chill. Rent us a booth where we’ll be alone, away from all that noise. Spend some quality time together?” he smirked. “Get into some trouble-.”

“Aaaah! Don’t be dirty!” you whined as he opened the passenger door for you.

“Nah.” he burst out laughing. “Your reactions are too cute.” 

“Jerk.” you scoffed as he shut the door. He tossed your duffel in the back seat and walked around to the drivers side, getting situated himself. Yoongi had a nasty mouth. It always made him wonder if he had to have his mouth washed out with soap.

“Don’t act like you don’t love it.” he bit his lip mischievously as he started the car. He laced his fingers in yours as he drove off. You wordlessly stared out the window, feeling his thumbs trace over your knuckles.

...(Le time skip!)

“Thanks babe.” Yoongi winked as you poured his another shot. “You want another?” he got ready to take the bottle from you.

“No.” you shook your head, placing the bottle on the table. “If I have anymore you’re gonna have to pick me up off the floor.” you giggled, covering your mouth to stop from getting too loud.

“I wouldn’t mind that.” he replied with his own laughter. “I should stop too, I guess. I’ve probably had too many already.”

“Well we almost finished the whole bottle.” you said. “I’d say we’ve had well over our limit. You still need to drive tonight, dude.” you leaned on his shoulder. “What should we do for the rest of the night?”

“What do you want to?” he asked as he downed the shot. “It’s pretty late, isn’t it? What do you say we... Go back to my place.” he bit his lip with a sly smile on his face.

“And just what are we gonna do at your place?” you raised a curious brow at him, already having a good idea of where this was gonna go.

“We could relax...have a nice drink.” he bit his lip, obviously forgetting you two were just drinking now. “Maybe have a bath together?” he ran his fingers up your thigh. “Help you forget about the day you’ve had.” he bit his lip.

“Yoongi are you trying to get me naked?” your legs shook a little under his touch.

“Is it working?” he leaned forward to press his lips against your forehead.

“Maybe.” you tried to hide the smile rising on your face. “If you can convince me.” you shrugged innocently. 

“I think I can be really convincing.” he whispered.

...(Another time skip!)

You were the first to stumble through the door of his room, him trailing behind. His chest was pressed flush against your back, his mouth whispering dirty sentences in your ear. You could feel his hands trailing under your shirt. Both of you were a tiny bit tipsy, so you were a giggling mess. You both were now completely sober, and all you could focus on was each other.

“So how about that bubble bath?” he began leading you towards the bathroom. He tugged at the hem of you shirt. 

“Lead the way.” you bit your lip to keep from smiling.

“Give me a second.” he briefly kissed the side of your head. Without another word, he walked ahead of you to the bathroom. You heard water running, followed by the movement of things. You took the time to look around the room. His place looked just like the stereotypical men’s room. There was a little bit of messiness here and there. His blankets and pillows were everywhere. You had spent the night before, but not to this degree. You eyed his open closet, looking like it had exploded in an array of clothes and shoes. If he was freaking out as much as you were, then it was perfectly excusable why his closet looked like a tornado flew threw it.

Before you could look around any more Yoongi came up behind you. You turned around to face him with a shy smile. He took your hand, leading you in the direction of his bathroom. 

As you got the the bathroom, there was a strong flowery scent wafting through the air. You looked at the bathtub, which was covered in a mountain of suds. You felt his hands under your shirt. “Can I help you out of these clothes?”

You wordlessly lifted your arms above your head, allowing him to help you out of your shirt. You usually weren’t this shy, but there was a pit in your stomach. “Get these pants off.” he fumbled with the button of your jeans. 

You playfully stepped away from him and rid yourself of the rest of your clothes, bra, panties, down to your socks. Yoongi could feel himself growing hot and bothered by his clothes and made short work of them. You had no idea where his clothes landed, and you didn’t care. 

Soon enough, you were leaning against Yoongi’s chest, relaxing in the hot water. It was like everything melted off, the stress, the headaches. You could feel his fingertips drawing patterns into your back. He knew how much you loved it. You could hear his steady heartbeat which lulled you into a calm trance. You began playing with the hill of sweet smelling bubbles like a child. 

It had been a while since you relaxed, going as far as to not even leave bed somedays. You felt happy, you felt like you could actually sit down and breathe without being hated for it. Yoongi held you close, pressing kisses on the back of your head as he watched you carry on. Yoongi’s kisses suddenly moved down your neck, to your shoulder, and up your jawline. 

You ceased your activity, nearly going limp in his arms.”Y-yoongi.” you whined. Yoongi began exploring your body, not leaving an inch of your torso untouched. “That’s not fair.”

“Hm. Why don’t we cut this bath short.” he whispered in your ear.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

...

[seancekitsch]

Heat

Diego Hargreeves x Reader filth but also its kinda sad ngl

warnings: unprotected m/f sex, emotionally stunted idiots, set in the same universe as prize buck, sadness, one half of a whole fic

It was hard to believe that Diego could hit it off with one of Klaus’ friends, let alone be friends with her for about a year now, and have her fall into his bed with him for the past five months on a poorly executed friends with benefits arrangement. She wasn’t a maniac, and even though that Indiana Jones chick from rehab Klaus was playing house with was nice, he couldn’t handle yet another person with a personality like his brother. And actually how Klaus had met this new friend of Diego’s was through a therapy program, so he was sure there was something wildly inappropriate about their friendship, but he would look the other way because Diego knew calling that into question would be calling her into question in general and she didn’t need that because she was good. She was really fucking good. He was crazy about fucking this girl with a great ass and a fire that matched his own, but it was more than that. She was a good friend, the kind of friend Diego needed. The kind of friend that would patch him up after getting into a scrape and not lecture him on it, but still call him on his bullshit and push him to do better for himself.

Like tonight, you come to him wearing no panties under your short tight skirt, animatedly telling him about an empty warehouse with cheap rent he could probably turn into his own boxing gym like he told you he was considering one morning. You’re so excited about this business opportunity because when does cheap easily renovated business space just fall into the lap of someone looking to start a business? But in the back of your mind you know it crosses a line that each day was getting harder to navigate. Yeah, that’s probably more than what “just a friend” would be doing for him. But then again, “just a friend” wouldn’t be beckoning him to strip with his hand up her skirt, deftly making all the right moves. This arrangement started a few months ago, actually in the very room you’re in now. You had both had a few beers, the conversation traveled towards relationships, and you made an off-handed comment through loose and tipsy lips that you were lonely, you forgot what a man’s touch felt like after your last break up. And, well, Diego? He offered to remind you. And then the next weekend he reminded you again. You’d made up a “no attachments” rule and said that this was temporary, just friends lending one another a helping hand or mouth or every body part, but would end whenever either of you found something “real”. But somehow as you woke beside him morning after morning, you fell in love. Love love. Real “I want to fuck you and then I want to open a business with you and make you breakfast and write my stupid first name next to your stupid last name” love. And fuck, did it hurt. But being close to him and having it feel like torture was worse than not having him at all. Actually, that thought process is shit, you think, you’d never let a client think like that about their personal relationships. So why were you? Why were you hurting yourself? Why would you...

The thought dies in your mind and is replaced with Diego. Everything is Diego when he’s got two fingers roughly working you over from the inside, calloused fingers such a drastic contrast from the soft smoothness of your cunt. He knew exactly how to work you, knew exactly what to do to have you begging and crying out his name long into the night.He keeps you on edge giving you enough to have your legs shake and for you to have to lean your weight on his shoulder, but not enough to be what you need. No, that was a job solely for Diego’s cock. He brings your right to that moment before sweet release and then usually impales you on his cock. His idea of reminding you of a “man’s touch” which has kind of become a macho competition against himself, but you wouldn’t complain if it meant he kept making you scream like this. Tonight he’s determined to put in the effort, to really have you screaming as you come around him, because theres something to celebrate and not because he has this desire to make you happy. Diego loves nothing more than to see you like that, like it’s just you and him in the world, and nothing exists outside the two of you in his bed. He loves the sigh that falls from your lips as he makes quick work of the skirt, but refuses to let you sit down. He loves the way you laugh when his kisses tickle your hips and stomach. He loves the way you get impatient and crawl into his lap on his cot of a bed while he continues to undress you. He keeps his fingers moving, thrusting in and out and scissoring them within you, adding pressure from his thumb making light circles on your clit. You unbutton your shirt but then when he looks back up your head is hung to the side, watching him through mascara covered lashes and parted lips. God, you’re flushed and panting already, he thinks, it’s so fucking sexy. The hand not fucking you travels from the top of your ass to your breasts, groping and squeezing earning him little mewls of approval. He could listen to that for the rest of his life. 

Your hands reach to his scalp and he groans as your nails rake between his hair. His hands and mouth feel like fire against your skin but you want more and more and more. The heat is inside you as well, pooling deep and threatening to escape your very being. But as always, Diego doesnt let you have it that easily. No, his hand slips from under you and instead he takes those two fingers that were just fucking you and wraps his lips around them. A dramatic moan as he licks and sucks all traces of you off his lips.

“Girl, you taste so fuckin good.”

You cant formulate a response to that, so instead you pull him as close as you can as he puts the other arm around your back and bends until your back hits the bed. He wastes no time leaning back up to whip off his shirt and haphazardly wiggle his pants down to his ankles before kicking at them until they are no more than a heap at the floor. 

This was Diego at his most desperate to be inside you. He loved the way that your eyes fluttered closed and your entire chest heaved. He loved how your legs and arms would wrap around him and hold him so intimately close, like he anchored you to the earth. 

When he thrusts inside you, you do exactly that. His pace is rough, but not fast. He’s strong and deep, the way that it feels like he's inside all of you. The friction, the rocking, its a delicious fire that nips at your entire being. He kisses and bites at your shoulders and breasts, like hes trying to memoize your skin with every part of him as he fucks you into the mattress. In out in out harder harder harder. Thanks to his game, you're already clenched around him and close to coming, but judging by the sloppiness of his thrusts, he probably wouldn't last that long tonight either. Theres something all consuming about tonight. About the way he holds you so tight he could break you, the way hes as deep as possible and your bodies meet at every seam. About the way your skin burns hotter than any other time. 

And the dam breaks. Your skin is so hot you're sure he can feel it too, youre screaming, you can feel in your throat, but all you see and hear is white. He holds you and shakes, and the way you feel him paint the inside of you makes you shudder again, aftershocks or another orgasm, too hard to tell the difference. And you're breathing. And hes sliding out of you. And you see the ceiling. And then you see his face.

“Oh, shit…” Diego mutters, looking worried, “Did I hurt you or something?”

What did he mean? What… oh. You were crying. Tears were streaming down your face. Suddenly the room feels small, cold, anything but a room with someone you love. And you know you have to get out. You are officially in too deep. Without even responding you get up and start to fiddle with clothing, shaking hands buttoning haphazardly all to just get free of this room and Diego as soon as possible. 

“Sh-sh-shit, Y/N, I’m s-sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you or anything, p-please”

“You didn’t hurt me, Diego,” You refuse to meet his eyes, its easier that way, “I just can’t do this anymore. This can’t happen again.”

“What, like y-y-you f-found someone? You c-could have told me.”

Fuck fuck. Fuck! You know he only stutters when he’s upset. And he's upset. Why was he so upset? You were just fucking. You were the one throwing love away. You. He was just having fun with a woman in his bed three or four nights a week. 

“I just, I can’t sleep with you anymore, Diego.”

I can't sleep with you anymore. That was it, he thought, he was the problem. You can't sleep with him. 

Before he responds, you’re already up the stairs and out the door. You're gone. 

On his bed is the address of that gym, intentionally left. 

Next to it is a hair pin, unintentionally left.

[phoneybeatlemania-bit-the-dust]

Number 2 on the angst/fluff prompt list

2. “I’m worried about you.”

CW: Disordered eating

Scotland, sometime in the 70’s

“Hiya, love.” Paul said as he entered the kitchen. He’d just come back from the shops, grabbing a few groceries; he enjoyed the simple tasks such as shopping and even, to some extent, cleaning, because it balanced out well with the chaos of navigating celebrity life.

“Hiya.” John returned, scarcely looking up from his book, of which he read sitting at their kitchen table. As Paul walked past him, he stopped in his tracks to plant his hands around his partners shoulders, hugging him, and giving him a tender kiss on his temple. John in return cupped Pauls hands with his own, giving them an affectionate squeeze. They had built a small life for themselves in recent years - it was nice.

After setting his bags of shopping down on their kitchen table, Paul motioned towards the TV that sat in the corner of their kitchen. He switched it on, not so much to watch it, more so just for the ambient sound. Some sort of cricket game was on, neither of them cared.

“Anything happen whilst I was out?” Paul asked casually.

“Not much. Cyn’ rang - she wants to know if we can take Jules for the week next week, cause he’ll be on half term, y’know-like.”

Unloading the bags, Paul replied, “Course we

can; he can stay here anytime!”

“Yeah, well, thats what I told her.”

Opening the cupboards and noticing little, perhaps even none, of the food had been touched, Paul muttered softly, “Have you eaten today?”

Not batting an eye from his book, John responded, “Not yet - no.”

“Oh.” He hoped that this didn’t mean what he thought it meant, and so he insisted, “Well ill make you something.”

“‘M fine Paul…” he grumbled back disdainfully.

“But you didn’t eat much for breakfast either; ye must be starving-“

“‘M fine, alright,” He growled with a little more intent. “just let me be, will ye?”

“I only want you to eat, love; I worry about you when ye don’t.”

“Ill eat later.” John replied coldly.

“But thats still not a lot; ye have to eat more then one meal, y’know.”

“I am Paul - just drop it, alright?” And with that, he closed his book, and abandoned Paul in the kitchen.

After a few minutes of contemplation, Paul followed John over to where he was sat at the sofa, placing himself down beside John. John payed him little attention, still staring intently, at the television, and so Paul took the others hands into his own, and stated bluntly, “John, im worried about you.”

“Paul…” he groaned, but Paul wouldn’t allow him to dismiss him like that, and so he interjected. 
“No, listen, im worried yer stressing about yer weight again; and I dont want you to do this to yourself again.”

“Im fine, Paul.”

But he ignored Johns protests, continuing, “Are ye stressing about that TV interview yer doin’ in a few days time? Cause we can cancel it if you are - id rather cancel it then have you hurtin’ yerself over it.”

“Don’t worry about it Paul - ill be fine.”

“I want you to be happy though, not fine.”

“Paul. ‘M okay, im just not hungry today, alright?”

“Alright…” Paul whined defeatedly, realising he was not going to get through to John at this hour. “But you know ill love you regardless of how you look. You know that right?”

“Yeah, I know that.” John said acceptingly, but he didn’t sound convinced.

He never knew what to do with John when he would get like this: self-conscious, and insecure about his weight. John would never really talk to him about it, other then the occasional comment when he was a little tipsy - but even then, John would change the subject before Paul had the chance to enquire too deeply into what he was saying.

But he could see the ways his other half would look at himself in the mirror, and he see the glances he’d give his food when he felt he’d eaten too much that day. He wished he could help, but he didn’t understand. He made sure to shower John with love and affection, always reminding him of how handsome he still thought he was - even in their old(-ish) age - and some would even say he coddled and cared for John too much! But still, it appeared to make little difference to Johns confidence.

Later that night, as Paul was on the phone to George, and John was in the shower, he complained, “D’you know, I just dunno what to do with him when he gets like this.”

Sternly, George said in response, “Ive told ye before Paul, ye coddle him too much. Ye gotta face the facts - you cant help him, he needs sort of therapy-like.”

“I know, I know. But he’s convinced he’s fine - he thinks he’s mellowed out, y’know, with old age.”

“Old age? Yer only in yer thirties. ‘Sides, he hasn’t ‘mellowed out’, the problems still there, he’s just a little less…” he struggled to find a kind word to describe him, eventually he came across, “y’know, a little less emotional. Little less enraged-like.”

“Yeah, I suppose yer right. I guess ill talk to him about it tonight - but I don’t think he’ll go for it.”

“Give it a go, he’ll come around sometime.”

“Yeah…” Paul sighed. “Listen, ill let ye go now - give you a ring sometime tomorrow. Give my love to Olivia, will ye?”

“Yeah, alright. Bye.”

“Bye.”

***

Sometimes a girls gotta write herself a comfort ED fic instead of actually dealing with her FUCKING problems

[sapiowoman28]

Try (Chapter 6): Madam's Party

Pairing: Mark x Y/N x Johnny

Genre: smut, fluff, undercover au with cranky undercover agents

Warnings: mentions of Mark's mental health issues, brief mention of bathroom sex, drug use, Jaehyun is miserable, Doyoung is back, Taeyong saves the day, mentions of a fight. Oh, and Ten doesn't like women hitting on him.

Note: the next few chapters after this one and the next will focus more on the relationship between Johnny and Y/N as well as the dynamic between Doyoung and Y/N.

Mark watched the screen as his online payment went through. He had just booked his tickets for his trip to London. This time he planned to stay 2 weeks.

He had learned his lesson. That one time a year or two ago he stayed there for a month, and it was a total disaster. He came back with his head all messed up, panicking about life in general.

Then both Taeyong and Y/N convinced him to do some online therapy thing and things got better. He was in a better head space now. He was no longer a nervous wreck, overthinking his life and his future. But he kept his trips short. The London weather just didn't agree with him, and he didn't really enjoy the vibe there.

His phone beeped. He picked it up to see who had texted.

"Hey." it was Y/N. He missed his best friend terribly. But he wasn't sure if he was ready to talk.

"Hi." he replied after 2 minutes of staring at the message.

"You going for the party?"

"Yeah. With Kun and Lucas."

"I'm going too."

"With Doyoung?" he smiled to himself. "I heard he's going."

"Mark Lee! You never change do you?" he could imagine her looking exasperated. He giggled to himself.

Silence. He put his phone back down.

It dinged again a minute later. It was her.

"I should have used the safe word when you did what you did. Instead i just continued and got resentful. And made you leave after that."

"I should have been gentle.... I'm sorry Y/N."

"Maybe we need to talk about no go areas. Johnny thinks three of us should have dinner next week and talk. We're all new to this you know."

"I'm going to London next week. For two weeks."

"Can I go too? I really want to meet that weird uncle of yours who believes in aliens."

They ended up talking on the phone, catching up about life the past 2 weeks. Neither of them mentioned the incident again. The discomfort was still a little too fresh in their minds. But they were glad they were talking again.

The party was in full swing when Y/N arrived at half past 11. Yuta had indeed booked the entire VIP section and just about everyone was there. A small group of people had formed around Doyoung, fussing over him and his crutches and he was enjoying every bit of attention he was given. She rolled her eyes.

She wasnt sure if she was ready to face him yet. Their relationship had been terse since that incident where she punched him in the face during a heated argument. in the middle of an operation. in fact when Doyoung got into an accident during the next operation she was a little relieved he would be out for a while to recover. Now he was a little more mobile, it sure looked like he would be back sooner rather than later.

But having to deal with Taeyoung was worse. At least Doyoung recognised she was the best person to get advice on technology matters, and respected her recommendations. So maybe Doyoung being back would be a good thing. She decided to walk over. Doyoung had spotted her, and there was no escape now anyway.

"DDDDDDD!!!!!!" she shrieked excitedly hoping she was at least a little convincing.

"Oh my! Y/N! You are looking good! Must be the glow of love?" Doyoung winked as they hugged.

Stupid Taeyong. He couldn't ever stop talking about Johnny to everyone.

"I see Taeyong's told you."

"Yes, of course, he really really approves." Doyoung whispered. "I just hope you're behaving?"

Y/N sighed. The legacy of her and Mark was always going to be there. No escape. She wished they'd get over it for once. It only happened the first 6 months of her joining the unit. They had already declared each other as best friends a year ago. But everyone still insisted they had a thing for each other.

Some other person faked shrieked at Doyoung and she left as soon as she could, taking a seat at the bar to people watch, ordering a drink. She scanned the room, cursing silently as she saw Ten approaching.

She wasn't in the mood to talk about work now. He wasn't pleased with the first draft of her report, and wanted to make changes she didn't approve of. The guy had something stuck up his ass. It always had to be done his way, but it just wasn't always the best way to go about things.

"Hi my dear!" Ten gave her a kiss on both her cheeks. "Looking good! Heard from Taeyong you have a boyfriend now."

She was going to kill Taeyong.

"You look hot, Ten. I love your shirt! Are the girls throwing themselves at you again?" she grinned.

Ten grimaced. "I seriously don't want to talk about it."

"You're so handsome, I don't blame them you know." she pinched his cheek. He laughed.

"About the report you emailed me." he started.

"I saw your email. But i don't wanna talk about work tonight, Ten. Can we just have fun?" she pouted.

"Fine. I'll call you on Monday. Anyway i just came over to say hi and tell you how good you're looking. I've to go back to the guys. I've been tasked to keep an eye on Jaehyun tonight. He's being a little heavy with the drinking."

"I'm sorry, is this seat taken?" they turned to look. Mark.

"Hello stranger." Y/N grinned. Mark looked adoringly at her.

"I promise I won't tell anyone." said Ten, slipping away. "Your boyfriend won't ever find out!"

"What's wrong with him?" mark asked.

"He's been tasked with babysitting Jae."

"Oh man. Dude must be in a totally angsty mood now."

"Yeah this party isn't helping, you know. It's like Yuta rubbing in his face, 'I got a promotion, Jaehyun! I got a promotion! Yay!!!'"

"And you're drinking?" he tasted her gin and tonic. "You can't even handle the alcoholic content of Kombucha."

"Mark Lee! I swear to god! I was not tipsy on Kombucha that time. You need to stop telling that story to everyone. I can hold my liquor!" Y/N faked strangled him as he giggled.

Their eyes met. And the laughing stopped.

"I missed you." he said.

"You were the one who refused to talk to me. For two fucking weeks, Mark Lee! Two weeks!" she chided.

"You didn't talk to me either."

"I wanted to give you space."

"Thanks. I needed time to think."

"Are you done thinking?"

"Yeah.

"What's the conclusion."

"I agree with you guys that we need to discuss no-go areas. We can do that when I'm back."

"Ok. As long as your mind is not fucked up like that time... "

"It was just one time, Y/N! Just one time!"

"I'm just teasing you baby. Im glad therapy has helped you feel more grounded." She smiled. "I'm proud of your progress you know."

"I miss you calling me baby." he grabbed her hand.

"Mark, people are watching. I bet Kun's watching us now." she scanned the room, catching Kun's eye at the other side of the bar where he was with Lucas and Doyoung. Kun, realising he had been caught watching, looked away after shaking his head.

"Idiot." she cursed. "Maybe we should put on a show to irritate him."

Mark giggled.

"I can't believe Lucas and Doyoung are hanging out." Y/N nudged Mark, whose eyes grew huge upon realising that they were indeed siting together.

"Lucas fucking hates him, yo!"

"Well Doyoung doesn't like Lucas much either. Which makes this funny."

"Half the people here don't like the other half. They're all pretending."

"So are you pretending to like me too Mark Lee?"

"What do you think, Y/N?"

"You love me." she grinned.

"Well you love me too." he winked then stiffened. This conversation was getting odd. Y/N looked away.

They spent the evening in a comfortable silence, watching the party get rowdier and rowdier as more people joined. Some people started to bring out the magical stuff and it was downhill from there.

Y/N knew she was done for the night when she needed the rest room, only to enter it and find Yuta with his lady bent over the sink, him screwing her. She froze, they stopped to look at her, eyes dilated from whatever drug they had taken.

"Er. Hi guys!" she chirped awkwardly.

"Y/N!!!" Yuta exclaimed excitedly as Madam giggled. "Hi Y/N!"

"Bye!" she grinned.

she turned around stomping off. She needed to pee. Badly. There was only one person who could help her.

"Taeyong!" She yelled as she stomped towards him. He was talking to Mark and Taeil. All three of them looked at her.

"Hmm. Someone looks crossed." Taeyong teased. She wasn't in the mood for teasing.

"I need to pee urgently, but your two best friends are in there screwing. You're the only person who can sort this out, Tae! Please, put your tyrant nature to good use?"

Mark laughed hysterically as Taeil shook his head and smiled.

"Your wish is my command, Miss Y/N" Taeyong laughed before strding to the female restroom to scare them out.

"And you thought your unit was dysfunctional." Taeil said to Y/N who burst out laughing.

Taeyong came back after completing his task, and Y/N raced to the washroom, glad to finally be able to pee. She washed her hands, and was touching up her lipstick when she heard Mark's voice.

"Er. Y/N?" He stood at the door awkwardly.

"Mark, what the heck?"

"I think we should leave. A fight broke out."

"what happened?"

"I think Jaehyun challenged Yuta to a fist fight."

Y/N sighed. Maybe Taeil was right about his unit. And yes, it was time to call it a night. But she was hungry.

"Supper?" she asked Mark. His eyes lit up as he nodded his head.

[nieladasdenani]

Supercorp where kara hints that she loves when Lena waers suits and continuously tries to be sneaky in getting her to wear them. I think it would be adorable if it was set before they are dating but honestly do whatever you think is better😇😇❤️❤️❤️❤️

Hi, Anon! Thank you for the prompt! I hope you enjoy it! (You can read it on AO3 if you prefer)

------------------------------------------------------

“You’re wearing a dress”.

It’s not a question, but a statement that comes out of Kara’s disappointed? outraged? mouth. So Lena frowns down at her very sexy, very expensive designer dress.

“Yes?”

“Huh”

“What...” the fuck? 

Lena looks down again. And, she’s sorry, but she actually looks pretty damn good in this dress. She spent the better part of her before-bed-routine thinking about what she would wear today. And she specifically selected this dress because of how well it hugs her figure and because of the color. Because Kara, herself, has told Lena time and again how good she looks in this color. How pretty her eyes shine next to it. So, yes, what the fuck?

“Nothing just... Nothing. You look gorgeous!” But Kara is frowning. No, pouting. And Lena knows she’s not an expert on Kryptonian culture or social etiquette. But she knows this Kryptonian very well. And Kara is upset because Lena is wearing this dress.

“I could change?...” With no superpowers, Lena just saw a flash of hope in Kara’s eyes. She’s sure of it. Before:

“No! No? No, no. Lena, you look amazing. I’m sorry. I guess I’m just tired”

“Are you all right?” Now she’s worried. Maybe Supergirl had some sort of top-secret mission.

“No. Yes, I’m fine. Just... It’s nothing. Promise.” And, finally, she smiles a genuine smile. A Lena smile. One that Lena can’t help but return, despite being a bit confused about her friend's behavior.

“Very well. Shall we?”

“Of course!”

And off they go. They’ll be joining the rest of the group at the new and improved alien bar. M’gann’s alien bar. It’s a sort of inauguration, but a more private one, before the grand opening they’re planning for next week. Lena is delighted that her dark chapter with Kara is in the past. They both worked really hard to mend their relationship and themselves. Years of traumas definitely influenced the terrible outcome. But neither could avoid their responsibility nor blame it all on their respective pasts. Therapy and hard work from them both have not only reanimated their friendship, but Lena would dare say it’s better than ever. They are better than ever, So much so that Lena is hopeful for more. She’ knows Kara feels the same. But they’re cautious of not rushing into anything.

It’s why she thought so hard on her outfit for the celebration tonight. She’s supposed to be wooing Kara and instead she, apparently, disappointed.

“Do you think I’m overdressed?” Lena asks, just to try and see if she can figure out what the deal is. Because Kara herself is looking very fine in her own dress. Her lovely hair curled up in a simple but fancy bun, exposing her strong neck, which makes Lena wish she was a vampire, so she could sink her teeth in it.

“What? No! Lena! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude before. You look beautiful and perfect, as usual.” At Lena’s raising eyebrow she keeps going, a tad nervous. “I just thought you, uh, would maybe wear a suit? I mean, you, ah, you said they’re more comfortable, and I want you to be comfortable. Because it’s a celebration between friends! So you should be as comfy as possible, right?” And she lets out that adorable nervous little giggle she does, that never fails to make Lena smirk (or smile... or melt)

“Huh. Well, I didn’t even think about a suit for the occasion. I usually wear them for business. You know, intimidating CEO and all.” Lena teases, hoping to lighten the mood and move on but, oh. Kara is blushing?

“Yeah” Is a breath more than speech. And Lena’s brain is working at a speed that would leave Barry behind. But they’re here. They have arrived at the bar, and she has to let it go. For now. The best thing about M’gann’s bar is that it serves alien alcohol. Which was exciting before. But now? Now she’s eager to get in and let a couple of hours pass.

A couple of hours had passed and Kara is wonderfully tipsy. Most of them are, actually. But Lena had a new goal in mind for the night, so she refrained from consuming too much, or too fast. She’s watching Kara like a hawk because she doesn’t want the alien to get drunk. Her blue eyes are just barely glassed, her cheeks tinted the prettiest pink, and she can’t seem to be able to stop smiling. Or giggling.

They have sung, they have danced, laughed, and eaten. Now, Lena knows, they’re close to ending the night. They have spread in little groups, conversing. So she waits for the moment Nia leaves Kara to go in search of Brainy to sit next to her.

“Hello, darling.”

“Lena!” Kara beams at her. Lena wants to kiss her.

“Enjoying yourself?” Kara nods and lets her eyes roam over Lena’s whole body. “Enjoying the view?” She tries, because, why not?

“Yeah”

“I thought you didn’t like this outfit”

“What? No! I love it! You look so pretty!”

“Huh. I don’t know. You seemed disappointed I didn’t wear a suit?”

“Yeah.” Kara exhales and looks down at Lena’s body again. “You look so sexy in your suits”

“Is that so?”

“Uh-huh. So badass. And sexy. Did I mention how sexy you look in your suits?”

“You did” Lena's smile is so big she’s worried she might dislocate her jaw. “I wish I knew before how much you wanted to see me in them.”

“Why?”

“Eyes up here, Supergirl.”

“Uh... sorry”

“See? You can’t see my breasts as well in a three-piece suit.”

“So much sexy”

“The dress or the suit?”

“The suit! Always the suit, Lena. So sexy”

“God I want to kiss you” And, oh, Lena did not want to say that out loud. At least not here or now. But now Kara is looking her in the eye. Her smile is so bright, it could probably recharge her Kryptonian cells.

“Yeah?” At Lena’s nod, she confesses: “I want to kiss you, too. I want to kiss you all the time. Especially when you’re wearing a suit.”

And that’s it. Lena takes Kara’s face in her hands as if she’s made of glass instead of being one of the most powerful creatures on Earth, and kisses her senseless. Or she would if it weren’t for a pointed clearing of a throat, right behind her.

“Come on, Luthor! Really? You’re going to kiss my little sister on a bar for the first time?” And Lena leans back, not letting go of Kara’s face, closing her eyes to savor the fact that she kissed her. She did. And it was all she ever thought it would be. But better. So Alex’s purposed dig is not going to ruin this for her. Kara, however...

“Alex! Go away! Don’t you have a girlfriend to kiss yourself?”

“Oh, you think I’m not going to take the chance to annoy you guys on your first kiss? What kind of big sister do you take me for?” And Lena chances a look at Alex over her shoulder because she doesn’t sound drunk at all. Not even tipsy. And Lena’s glare softens when she thinks of Kara worrying over her sister's drinking problem. Thinks of how much Alex has worked on her own issues. And of how much the fact that both Danvers sisters had worked so hard on themselves has made their bond all the stronger.

“The best sister!” Kara says, solemn, not a hint of tease in her voice. And then is Alex softening. And Lena is so grateful that Kara has this. That she worked on fixing things with Alex, too. Because she could not get in between these two. 

“Come on, you dorks. We’re all leaving.”

And yes, there’s only the three of them inside. The place looks kind of tidy. Which, when did that happen? So, they gather their things and get outside with the rest. 

“You’ll take her?” Alex asks Lena once they have all shared good-bye hugs. And Lena turns to see Kara squishing M’Gann, again. Smiles:

“Always”.

[flashbackharry]

You need sleep

Prompt 21

21.“You need sleep”

sorry couldnt sleep and ended up yearning. 

Masterlist:

You can request a prompt from this list.

It was game night. There was never really a true schedule to game night. Usually it was whenever everyone had one too many drinks in their system and were down to play some games for too long before someone got particularly heated and then everyone would go to bed. Tonight the living room was filled with snacks and possibly every kind of alcohol you could name. You were at Harry's house, all his band mates were in attendance, and few other people you've met a couple times as well as some new faces.

The game you were all currently playing was charades musical edition. It was your turn and the artist you got out of the hat was Bob Marley, you tried miming smoking a joint and instantly everyone screamed a billion names at you, it was hard when you yourself were a little tipsy having about 13 people who were also drunk yelling incoherent things at you. You were about to give up when you felt your phone vibrating in your pocket.

“No showing us pictures on your phone” Someone yelled from the audience.

You ignored them because your sister was calling you. She never called for no reason. You picked up as you were walking out of the living room to go someplace quieter, paying no mind to the boos that followed.

You took a deep breath and answered.  

“Hello?”

“Moms in the hospital agai- are you at a party right now?” Your sister said, her voice going from grave to vaguely annoyed. That was her alright, ever the queen of passive aggressiveness.

“Yeah, believe it or not my life continues on without you guys, and is she okay?” You said, your heartbeat quickening.

She let out a huff of air before speaking again.

“She escaped the facility she was in and they found her 4 miles away in some run down part of the city, trying to check into a hotel under the name of Audrey Hepburn.” Your stomach clenched a little at the sound of the news.

“They gave her some sedatives but doctors are thinking it's only going to get worse from here. They didn't say that exactly because they're doctors, they kinda have to be optimistic but I could tell from their facial expressions.”

You didn't respond to her. Partly because you didn't know what to say. You took your mom in when things started getting bad 4 years ago, but once she tried setting your apartment on fire in the middle of the night, you realized you couldn't help her to the best of your ability anymore. So you checked her into a mental health facility and made your sister her health care proxy. She's resented you for it ever since, but you couldn't bear making life changing decisions on behalf of your mom, you just couldn't stomach it.

“Hello? Did you even hear a word I just said? God y/n, I don't have to call and keep updating you on her, I can just leave you in the dark but I'm sure you'd actually prefer that.” She said, her tone growing more and more impatient with every second that passed.

“Don’t say that, of course I care, what do you want me to say? I’m sorry?” You pleaded, tears threatened to spill from your eyes now.

“Forget it y/n, go back to your party.” And with that, she hung up.

You felt your insides tighten and suddenly it felt like you couldn’t breathe. You were full on having a breakdown in Harry's back patio. You sat down on the stoop and pulled your knees close to your chest. Trying to remember the breathing exercises you learned in therapy but when that failed you resorted to slowly counting the number of times you exhaled.

You heard the sliding door open and Harry walked over to you and sat down, worry laced his facial features but you could tell he was trying to mask it. He was your best friend after all, whenever either one of you were hurting, it was like a visceral reaction in the other.

“Missed you out there, they got the karaoke machine out.” He said softly. You closed your eyes and he was right, you heard the music playing in the distance, followed by a random off key voice.  

“Is it your mum again?”

Harry was well versed in your family drama. He knew you when you took your mom in, knew the physical and mental toll the role of being her caregiver was. You never got enough sleep when caring for her, always afraid she would do something while you were sleeping, until one night she did. It was Harry who encouraged you to check her in somewhere, pleading with you to do so, he was so worried she would end up being the cause of your death.

After the incident with your apartment happened, Harry took you in. He never formally asked you to move in, it was just understood between the two of you that that was what was happening. He helped you find a therapist, to help with anxiety attacks and insomnia you had. You didn't feel guilty for doing what you had to do, but God did your sister make you feel like the worst person alive.

You filled Harry in on the phone conversation you just had. He listened intently, never interrupting and holding your hand whenever you got to a particularly difficult part to talk about outloud. You didn't know whether it was the alcohol or the exhaustion that usually followed from having an anxiety attack but you wanted nothing more than to go to sleep and forget this all happened.

As if reading your mind, Harry stood up, grabbing your hand and murmured against your ear,

“You need sleep, let's get you into bed.”

Harry walked behind you and led you up the stairs, past the group of people still lingering in the living room.

“Were gonna call it a night but you guys have fun, keep it down a bit though.” Harry said to them. His friends began to woo after him, assuming you were going up stairs to fuck. It was hard to explain to them that you guys weren't a couple, you just had a connection so strong and went beyond the basic labels of “boyfriend” and “girlfriend''. Simply put, you were never gonna love any one more than Harry and the same went for him.

When you got upstairs, you walked into Harry's room instead of yours. He helped you get out of your clothes for the day and into something more comfortable. He dug into his drawers and after some rummaging he found an old band tee for you to wear. You took your jeans off, your bottom half in nothing but your underwear.

He turned around towards you and tugged at the shirt you were wearing and you put your arms up as he lifted it off your shoulders, frizzing your hair in the process. Goosebumps raised on your skin as the room got colder and Harry pulled the oversized long sleeve tee over you quickly, when your head emerged from the hole you both paused as you looked at each other for a moment. A small smile appeared from his lips and you returned it. He wrapped his arms around you, a tight hug, the kind you could feel deep in your bones. He walked you back towards the bed, never breaking the hug until you were both under the covers.

He pressed a kiss into your temple, his arms still wrapped around you. You couldn’t sleep most nights, and when you did, it was never for more than a few hours at a time. But when you slept in the same bed as Harry, you slept through the whole night. Rarely any intrusive thoughts, when you did happen to get them, Harry always reassured you you were safe and softly, he would soothe you back to sleep. You felt the way he cared about you in every crevice of your body, and you were so glad to love and be loved by him.

[theonetheycallhannah]

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter 10: Myofascial Release

Characters: Captain Syverson x OFC (Shane Benton)

Summary: Shane and Sy decompress after an emotional evening, Shane finds it difficult to get out of her own head and live in the moment, but Sy knows exactly how to help her, and not to be a complete hoe and spoil things, but…things get steamier than ever between our favorite therapist and patient duo.

Oh snap! You’re behind! Get on track here!

Word Count: 3.4k

Warnings:  Language, mature themes, alcohol consumption, the smut you’ve all been waiting for so patiently! (I hope it lives up to your undoubtedly high expectations!)

Author’s Note: Oh gosh, y’all, I am so nervous to post this. Somehow it doesn’t feel like my smuttiest smut. And like, all previous chapters have been kind of leading up to this moment. The good news is, I’ve decided to continue writing this story after the sex. I’ve got some ideas about where to go from here, and I want to keep it going. Plus, it feels wrong to write all of this and then just drop them without a big picture resolution. They’re gonna go through some shit, though. You have been warned.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism.

Tags: 

@onlyhenrys

@cavillryarchive

@summersong69

@titty-teetee

@bloodyinspiredfuck

@agniavateira

@oddsnendsfanfics

@omgkatinka

@thisismysecretthirstblog

@misslaland

@speakerforthedead0

@tumblnewby

@suavechops

@radkesgirl83

Hope I’m not forgetting anyone! If you want to be notified when I post a new chapter or work, I’ll be happy to add you to my tag list! Stricken blogs are getting personal messages from me when a new chapter is uploaded because Tumblr’s faulty tagging system will not stand in the way of me delivering what the people want!(?) lol! (Although…their lackadaisical notification system might…sorry for that. I have no control. lol!)

X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@

Her living room was cast in the low light of the floor lamp she had left on. Intending to come home after dark. Alone. She hated walking into a dark house by herself.

Well, tonight, she wasn’t alone. And although Sy had been to her house before, this was different. They were officially a couple, and they were no longer waiting to express, to the fullest extent, their true affection for one another.

Ever the hostess, despite her nervous tension, Shane asked Sy if he wanted anything to drink, rambling off several options somewhat awkwardly.

“I’m fine, darlin.’” He assured her, stopping her at some point in the rant, before she was completely done. “Do you need something?”

“Umm, I think I should have a glass of wine.” Her eyes darted to the kitchen across her serve-through counter space and landed on her fridge. “I’m…I’m really nervous.”

"Why don't we watch a little TV for a while? You get you some wine, and I'll put somethin' on. What are we watchin', sunshine?"

"Ummmm, something light? Funny? Something I've seen." She wouldn't be able to process anything new or heavy right now.

"I'm on it." he kissed the top of her head and left her side for the sofa, where he plopped himself down like a comfy hound dog, and picked up the remote to her Smart TV.

She smiled as she busied herself in the kitchen. She decided she wanted a snack with her wine. She got a plate of cheese and crackers together first. Then she remembered she had some venison sausage one of her coworkers had brought in, and put that on the plate, too. She got out a chilled bottle of her favorite, cheap moscato and a stemless glass. She couldn't go in there without something for Sy, so she also got a glass of ice water ready for him. She put the whole spread on her big serving tray and took it to the living room.

Sy was already halfway through the first episode of Parks and Recreation.

"I saw this in your 'Watch it again' group, and thought maybe you'd like to re-watch it. I've heard you talk about it a lot, and I've never seen it." He didn't complain at her for taking forever. He just lit up when he saw her. Like it was the first time. And not the hundredth.

"That's perfect, babe. I brought some snacks out, too. Some cheese and crackers, and this really good sausage one of my coworkers brought me. You like deer?" she asked.

"One of my favorite pet names." he teased. "I do, though, yes."

They ate, and laughed, and watched about four or five episodes, it was hard to keep track. But after approximately half the bottle, Shane had summoned some courage. She started playing at the texture of Sy's jeans, running a fingernail across the coarse fabric.

"Hang on, love bug. I want to know somethin.'" she looked up at him, mildly confused. "I'm trying to think of a reason you need to get tipsy to sleep with me that I shouldn't take personally." he rubbed her upper arm, comforting her as no one had done since she was a small child. At least not that she could remember.

"No, Sy. It's not like that. You aren't the problem at all!" she paused. He let her gather her thoughts. She appreciated that he knew she intended to continue and that he didn't rush her to do it. He was patient. And kind. And all of that should have made this whole night easier. But somehow it didn’t.

“I’m the problem." She confessed after a long pause and a deep sigh. "I mean, I’m in my head about it all, I know. But it’s been…almost six years since I’ve slept with anyone, five and a half, at least, and I can’t seem to wrap my head around it now that I know it’s going to happen again.”

He pulled her body into his, squeezing her tightly for one of his soul cleansing hugs.

“Sunshine. Everything will come back to ya. We’ll just go as slow as ya want. I got all night.”

“Okay. Well, I guess, since I’m a bit sleepy from the wine, we should head to bed.”

Sy affirmed the idea, and made to help her put their snacks away in the kitchen.

She got out containers for their leftover food while Sy stoppered the wine, put it in the fridge, and washed their glasses.

She felt his warmth before she felt his touch. He stood behind her, radiating his particular brand of heat for a moment, and taking in the scent of her hair near her right ear. She heard a low rumble from someplace deep in him which slowed her efforts at the counter. His hands were light but very much present on her hips. A whisper against the fabric of the casual but feminine floral dress she’d chosen for the night. But she felt it like the weight of her favorite old blanket, heavy with years and warm comfort.

He kissed her temple, chaste and unassuming. But still full of desperation. She could tell that he was ready. Even without the alignment of their bodies completely giving him away.

“Don’tcha think this stuff can wait a couple hours, darlin'?"

His baritone, breathless in her ear, was soothing her back into the mindset of being with him. His feather touch still lingering at her hips and waist. She thought back to those seminars she'd gone to on manual therapy where the speaker talked in depth about the fascial tissues running all across the various muscles in the human body and how trauma to one part could cause tension in another like a snag in a sweater and how he taught the participants techniques to undo that trauma through myofascial release. Sy was slowly managing to unwind and unbind the taut fibers of her heart and relieve that pain that Elliott, in particular had set into place so firmly when he'd hurt her. Lied to her. Cheated on her. Gaslit her. Made her feel like she'd never be loved if she left him. Made her question the very idea of what love meant. Because if what they'd had was truly love, she didn't want it. Wanted no part of the games or the abuse or the manipulation.

Without fully realizing it, during this time of reflection and healing, Shane had given up the task at her hands and turned to Sy, open to his treatment, as he'd always been so open to hers…or mostly. And she let him kiss her, reciprocating. And hold her, returning his enveloping embrace. She even let him pick her up, wrapping her legs around his waist, resting them on his…all too well-defined bilateral gluteus maximus that she'd had to pretend to ignore for weeks. In the therapist side of her brain, alarm bells were going off. "His knee isn't fully healed! You're gonna undo all of the work you've both done so far! He's gonna hurt himself carrying you around!" but she ignored them and trusted him as he walked to her room.

Shane wanted to say that her bedroom was one of splendor. Immaculately made bed, and overall, the picture of tidiness. The reality was much, MUCH different. Glasses half full of water were everywhere (she may be forgetful, but at least she was optimistic), at least one coffee mug sat on the nightstand from the previous weekend when she took a morning cup of tea in bed with her George Harrison biography. Laundry overflowed from a sorting hamper in the corner, and her bed sat, unmade, littered with crumpled pillows, sheets, blankets, and the pajamas she'd slept in last night. She wasn't the kind of person to make her bed for reasons other than having company over, like the fancy company you had to give a tour of your whole house. She'd tried to be that person numerous times, but it never seemed to stick.

Tonight, though, the guilt that came with sub-par housekeeping skills wasn't plaguing her. Right now, all she felt was the weightlessness of being with Sy, wrapped in him, kissing him, and fully ready for what was about to happen between them, as he fell with her onto her bed. Their heads clunked together awkwardly, invoking a mutual wince, followed by bouts of laughter and playful kisses.

He hovered over her a moment, just taking her in. His fingers ghosting her forehead and cheeks to clear it of the whisps of hair obscuring her face. He seemed to examine her in methodical quadrants. Learning the curves and colors and every wrinkle, freckle, and pore. She was still fully clothed, but she'd never felt so bare and vulnerable.

He left her eyes for last. His gaze drowning her delightfully. Random song lyrics came to mind, "the serenity of a clear blue mountain lake" and she thought yes. That is the precise aesthetic of this man's stare. His expression was inscrutable. She wanted to say he looked happy and content, but she didn't want to presume.

He began tracing the floral pattern on her dress with his fingers, and said, "I really like this dress on you."

She laughed, "Oh, that's the beginning of the oldest line in the book. You know you've already got me in bed, right?"

"No, I…" he chuckled, embarrased. "I mean it sincerely. Seeing you in flowers like this…makes me think they bloom right from ya."

She propped herself up on her elbows, dumbstruck by this uncharacteristically poetic side of him she'd just been shown. She stroked the side of his face.

"The man who came up with the original pickup line is rolling over in his grave attempting to kick himself for not thinking of something so beautiful."

"Yeah?"

"HELL yeah. He would have gotten WAY more lucky with a statement like that."

"You're probably right." he said, pulling her up to hold her in his arms.

"If for no other reason that it would have landed him a higher caliber woman than the floozies that he probably got."

He moaned his ascent against her neck, and continued, "Which would have meant a lot more getting lucky down the road, right?"

"Traditionally speaking, I'd say yes." she laughed, her fingers in his hair, which was barely long enough for the action.

"Okay, I know I said I liked the dress, but…" he tugged at the hemline tucked just under her hips and pulled it off her willing body.

"About time, cowboy!" she smiled, breathless.

He continued kissing her as he unhooked her strapless bra and tossed it aside, into the abyss, where the dress had gone. She was so dizzy from him that she barely noticed he was laying her down until her warm back hit cool sheets. She could feel his touch everywhere at once, despite the fact that he was really only making two or three points of contact.

Shane trembled as Sy peppered her soft body with kisses. She couldn't recall shivering like this before, especially when there was nothing but warmth, even heat, around her. His beard grazing her hips and thighs was sending tremors through her unlike anything she'd ever felt. She was a goner, and he hadn't even truly begun.

His breath against her skin was like lightning in the clouds. A storm began forming within, and all around them from his work on her…and eventually in her. He took the time to remove both of the shirts he was wearing--plaid cotton blend and thick white jersey. She reached out to run her fingertips over his chest, covered in a manly stand of thick, dark hair. It ran over his pecs and down his abdomen…farther, she knew, than was exposed right now.

She wanted to touch him. To return the favor. To stir in him the same tempest he'd stirred in her. She unbuckled his belt and unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans. She was a little surprised he wasn't resisting her, but pleased, all the same. She took the heavy weight of him out in some shock…she'd caught outlines and silhouettes often since they'd been together, but he hadn't let her go this far yet. It had made her feel a little slutty at the time, but now, she understood. He was…protecting her, in a way. She handled him curiously, gently, as he'd been with her. Her apprehension, however, grew with him.

"Sy, you're…I…" she wasn't sure what to say. But she had concerns about being rent in two by him.

"I think I remember tellin' ya you wouldn't be laughin,' sunshine." he grinned at her, breathless as she stroked him.

"You were right. But don't get too used to me saying so." she smirked back at him.

He pulled away from her, reluctantly, but eager to get back to tasting her.

She couldn't comprehend what he was doing. But it felt incredible. No one she'd ever been with had made her feel like this. Like her blood was effervescent and her body was aglow like embers. His reaction to her was as much a part of the pleasure as his ministrations themselves. She could tell he was enjoying himself which fed her desire.

She felt a tension coiling inside her, something similar to climaxes past but she could tell, much more intense. What was different? Other than Sy, she didn't know. But it was working. She moaned and writhed into him.

"Yeah, sugar. Let that out. I wanna hear it." he quickened, driving her mad and sending her spinning into her bliss, incomprehensible words and sounds escaping her, growls of satisfaction escaping him, but he didn't stop.

She felt his fingers working inside her to pull another climax from deep within her. This was new for her, as well. Not only was he putting her first, but he was making her a priority in double measure before taking anything for himself. As that pressure built in her again, she felt his gaze on her, hungry and adoring, and she heard his grunts of exertion and she thought, lust. She wasn't sure how many of his digits he'd managed to slide into her, but it felt splendid, and she wanted more. She gripped his arms to convey this desire, words caught in her throat. He dove headlong back down to her, adding his mouth to the onslaught of his hand, and before she could get out more than a "Fuuuu" she was falling apart again, her body spasming and writhing beneath his utter oral perfection. Eventually, she finished the word when she ran out of air and had to take in a large gasp on the "uck."

She watched him kiss around her thighs and hips, in awe of him in his entirety.

Breathless, she asked, "Why are you so good to me, Sy?"

"Well, a wise woman once told me, 'good go to heaven.'" he looked coyly up at her. "I think I'm there, sunshine."

"Ya know, you're the best patient I've ever had." she smiled.

"Well, I should hope so." he boasted as he kissed at her breasts, nipping at the taut, dark bud in the center. She gasped. He let go and continued his ascent.

He had a point. Who could have qualified as a "better" patient than him when he'd given her so much? Even more than what they were doing tonight. His kindness. The love he had always shown her, even when she wasn't ready to see it. His strength, but also his vulnerability that she seemed to be the only one ever to see. Combine that with the fact that his mind was basically a steel trap for her every word and it would have made him more than perfect enough for her.

But as he broke away from her kiss to take off his jeans, she marveled at the shape and size of his whole body. Those thick, strong arms, the broad, defined torso, the massive, powerful legs of an avid runner, and a face that God Himself would probably be jealous of, if He was capable of the feeling. This gorgeous exterior that Michelangelo would have killed to sculpt, combined with all of his other amazing qualities, and he was almost too perfect.

He cuddled up next to her, reached up, and caressed her face, still flush with pleasure.

"I could look at this face, and nothin' else for…damn… hours. Maybe days."

She blushed and cast her eyes down, and half whispered, "The feeling is mutual."

"Then why're you lookin' away, darlin'?" he tilted her chin up. "That shy business is cute and all, but you don't have to hide from me, sweetheart."

"Again, it's not you, it's me." she chuckled, nervously.

"You wanna call it a night, for now?" he asked without a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"You're kidding, right?" she raised her eyebrows. "You did all that work getting me ready for you, and I won't let that be a wasted effort." she pulled him to her and into a deep kiss, rolling onto her back and bringing him with her.

"Oh, sugar, that wasn't no wasted effort. That was time well spent. No matter what." he said in short bursts when he could pull away from her lips.

He lifted himself up and over her, kneeling between her legs, already open for him. She thought he should know how ready she was. Thought it should be painfully obvious. But he asked anyway.

"You ready, sunshine?" he asked, as he opened the condom and rolled it on…damn he was slick! She hadn't even noticed him get it from wherever he'd had it. She presumed his jeans pocket, which would explain much. She had been very distracted by his naked perfection.

"Yes. Please." she had been struck with an urgency as they stood here on the verge of everything.

He sunk slowly into her, the contentment of coming home spread over his face, the bliss of being whole spreading over hers. No, she thought. She was more than whole. She'd always felt mostly whole during sex. Sy made her feel as though she was overflowing with herself. And not just because she was overflowing with him. The way he moved in her, over her, with her, it was like he was afraid she'd turn to vapor around him before he could finish. Like she was nothing more substantial than a bubble full of smoke, and he thought she may burst and disappear. Although, you couldn't tell from the tight grip he kept on her. A bruising grip that she thought might have had a chance of popping a football. She didn't care. She wanted him to touch and hold her like this until they had no more to give each other.

As they built toward their mutual undoing, the world and everything in it faded away. There was no personal drama or injury. Nothing but the euphoria of this newfound oneness. The caresses and thrusts and groans of pleasure were the only things that mattered. Each other, and what they found therein.

“Shane.” He whispered to her, his pinnacle nigh.

“Sy!” She whimpered, that familiar tension approaching its apex.

He kissed her, as if he meant to permanently emboss her onto the bedding and onto his lips. She reeled as she came undone, little sparks of light obscuring her vision for a fraction of a second. He followed her closely, breathless and spent.

He laid down beside her, as close to her as possible, and began drawing mindless circular patterns on her stomach and around her breasts.

“Wow.” She said, almost under her breath.

“How ya feelin,’ sunshine?”

“Mmm, boneless. Dazed. Half wishing we’d done that weeks ago. I didn’t have a clue what I was missing.”

“Oh, I think you had an idea.” He said as he neatly doffed and disposed of the prophylactic in the waste can by her bed.

“Okay, a bit.” She chuckled. “It’s not like you can hide that…thing.”

“And I don’t try to, darlin’!” He kissed her forehead “Well, I don’t hide it just anywhere, put it that way.” He smirked at his dirty joke and she swatted him for it.

“You’re bad!”

“And you love it.”

She couldn’t argue. She loved his badness and his goodness and everything in between.

Up Next: Chapter Eleven- Discharge Plan 

[svu-ncis-criminalminds]

Undercover Part 1

Hey all, I’m really really excited about this piece and I hope some of you are too! There will be some adult themes and some possible triggers. So warnings for mentions of canon typical violence including domestic violence, possible verbally abusive family trigger, and scenes with adult sexual content. That all being said please let me know if you enjoy it and a part two will be out soon. 

---

Your phone began to ring in your pocket and you fished it out in case it was Liv with orders or Rollins with the update from the lab. Unfortunately it was neither. Just that guy you saw last Friday calling for the umpteenth time this week.

“Do ya need to take that?” Your partner looked at you with concerned eyes, why did he always have to look so concerned?  

“No,” you assured, tucking the phone away again, “Nothing important,” Sonny tried to find your gaze but you avoided it, quickening your pace as you walked towards the witnesses apartment complex. Why did Sonny always have to worry? You got to the door and rang the bell next to their last name.

“Come on, whats up?” He asked and you merely glanced at him over your shoulder with a firm ‘drop it’ look. He grabbed your elbow anyway, grip gentle, “You can talk to me,” You felt bad now for shutting him out over such a stupid little thing, your partner was used to you telling him damn near everything. Well besides the minor detail that you were in love with him.

“Just some stupid failed Tinder date, level ten clinger.” You made a face and shrugged, “I told you it was nothing important.” Sonny’s face went neutral for a split second before smiling and opening his mouth to say something. Fortunately the conversation was cut short by the door opening. You turned and reentered professional mode, happy to leave that conversation about your ever failing date life behind.

Sonny had been your partner for a few years now, and you’d had feelings for him nearly the entire time. For a while you didn’t date, unable to try and find a connection when you knew there was one you wanted more. However, you had no possible chance with Sonny. Almost daily he reminds you that you're his best /friend/. And that would always sting a little.

But about a year ago you made a vow to yourself to try and stop loving Sonny, at least in that way. You began dating again, nothing serious ever came from anything. You kept comparing them to Sonny. They didn’t make you laugh like him, or feel safe like him.

And now? Now your sister was getting married at the end of the month, and you had a plus one that your parents expected you to fill. That was your fault for mentioning a possible future with a boyfriend who would end up being a douchebag. And now you were dateless and hopeless and wanting nothing more than to crawl under a rock.

---

“You wanna come round to my place for beers tonight? Or do you have a hot date?” Your partner asked, voice teasing. You know he wouldn’t do it if he knew it upset you, but you were a coward and couldn’t tell him it did. Or why it did.

“No hot dates for me, I’m swearing off men,” You joked back, leaning back in your chair to crack your back. You checked your watch and hummed slightly. “Time to go?”

“Time to go,” He agreed, “Does that mean you’ll come over?”

“Begrudgingly so,” You let out a drama sign and Sonny pouted at you from across your desks.

“You love me!” He proclaimed and you felt the heat rise up your neck at the words.

“I tolerate you.” You grumbled, not making eye contact as you packed your paperwork away. Sonny chuckled and did the same with his own work.

“Did you drive today?”

“I never drive.”

“Just checking,” He refuted.

You walked to Sonny’s car together, a modest smaller car, but still in good condition, Sonny was an expert at taking care of his things and making them last. You’ve seen the man keep a pen until it was empty. The drive was alright, traffic wasn’t bad and you talked about the ballgame Sonny had watched the night before. He had very strong opinions on everything, and you just enjoyed listening to him talk about something besides work.

Sonny kept a clean apartment in the sense that nothing was dirty. The kitchen was clean, the floors always swept. But the man still had clutter. Knick knacks he picked up in his college days and law books littered book shelves. You loved Sonny’s apartment. It was an extension of the man who stood in front of you opening beers with a butter knife.

“One day your gonna cut yourself.” You smirked, leaning against the counter as he struggled.

“It’s my party trick, open a bottle with a knife”

“You're not impressing me,” You grinned, and Sonny pointed the business end of the butter knife at you.

“Watch it, I’m armed.” You snatched the knife from him and hip-bumped him away from the beers popping one open then the next before handing the knife and one beer to Sonny. Some men you’ve dated would have grumbled at your display, but Sonny grinned like you’d just won a nobel prize.

“Incredible!” You shook your head before turning to go plop yourself down on Sonny’s couch, followed closely by the man. You watched some old cheesy movie that Sonny insisted was good (it wasn’t) but you enjoyed yourself, laughing and making jokes together. The credits rolled and a slightly tipsy Carisi tossed his arm around your shoulder to shake you slightly.

“Enjoyed it?”

“Oh yes. Especially the car chase, as cops we know that's exactly how that works.”

“Shut it,” Sonny laughed, “It’s a classic!” The room was quiet for a second too long, his arm still around your shoulder. Your lips felt loose from alcohol and you opened them before quickly clamping them shut again. “You okay?” the body beside you asked.

“I’m fine,”

“I mean.. In general.” He cleared his throat, “You’ve seemed down lately.” You smiled tightly and shrugged.

“I guess I’m just stressed out.”

“And if there was something else-”

“I’d tell you,” You promised the promise you always gave each other. But you were lying to him and that hurt you more than you could admit to even yourself, “I mean..” /what were you doing, abort mission, shut up!/ “I’ve just got this stupid family thing coming up.”

“Care to elaborate?”

“My sister is getting married.” You pulled a face. Your perfect little sister was marrying her douchebag high school sweetheart. Something about her being the youngest and getting married before you hadn’t been sitting right with your mother so she’d been even more intolerable lately. “And my mom is being.. Well, you’ve met her.” Some would call it being a strong type A personality, you called it lots of years of therapy.

“I’m sorry,” Sonny squeezed you into him, hand firm on your shoulder. You wanted to turn into him, embrace him and maybe even cry it out.

“Not your fault, at least it’s in the Bahamas. Maybe I’ll get a tan.” He laughed.

“Always a bright side.”

“I have a plus one.” What were you doing? Why did you just say that to him? Next time you were going to cut yourself off after 2 beers because obviously you couldn’t be trusted. You sat up slightly, playing with the hem of your shirt. “When I was seeing.. Adam, I told my mother I was bringing a boyfriend.” Sonny was always so patient with you, letting you get the words out as you collected your thoughts. “I haven’t told them what happened yet. And now I’m showing up alone, and they’re all gonna ask.” Your last relationship ended poorly. And that was being generous.

“That’s not their business if you don’t want it to be. Tell them he couldn’t make it. Tell them nothing, tell them whatever you want.” Sonny assured you.

“Do you want to be my plus one?” the words fell from your lips before you could stop them and the backpedaling started immediately. “I mean, as friends of course, moral support, you don't have to. Work is busy. It’s a weekend thing, I shouldn’t have asked.”

“Give me the dates, I’ll ask Liv tomorrow.” Was the response, and that shut you up.

“Really?”

“Of course! I’d love to, I’ll have to get a new bathing suit.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Sonny you don't-”

“Y/N. I know, I want to. I’d never send you into the lion den alone. I’d happily be your boyfriend for the weekend.” Boyfriend? For the weekend. Your brain felt like white static for a second.

“Boyfriend?”

“Well, that’s who you told them you were bringing? I’ll be the best damn boyfriend any of them have ever seen.” He promised and you gave a tentative smile.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“If you say that to me again I’m proposing during the ceremony.” He threatened and you laughed. Sonny squeezed your shoulder again before withdrawing his arm and standing up to clean up the coffee table. “Guest room is all yours.”

---

Liv had told Sonny he could have the weekend off for the wedding as long as the days counted towards his mandatory 7 yearly vacation days and not as a personal day. He was more than happy to oblige. You were leaving right from work on Thursday and meeting your brother and his wife at the airport, they were living in Jersey and you were all flying out of JFK. And even though your brother was less than a three hour drive, you hadn’t seen him since the holidays the year prior. You sat at your desk, nervously shuffling papers around.

You were about to pretend to date the man you loved, for an entire weekend. Just to avoid telling your family you’d been cheated on and ruthlessly dumped in your previous relationship. Now it was setting in how this was fake and you’d eventually have to lie and tell them the best man you’d ever known had ‘dumped’ you. Because this fantasy was just for the weekend.

You looked up as Sonny came out of the bathroom now wearing casual clothing for the flight. Your heart nearly stopped seeing him in jeans and a light sweatshirt. ‘Planes are always cold’ he had informed you the night before ‘don’t forget a sweater’. He always was looking out for you. You yourself had changed before starting paperwork, into a pair of leggings and an oversized sweater, planning on sleeping for most of the journey.

“Are we ready?” He asked, grinning as he approached your desk, “I’ve never been to the Bahamas before.”

“Keep rubbing it in Carisi,” Fin grumbled, “You two get to live it up at the beach while we all double our load.” You stood up and went to Fin’s desk patting his head.

“I promise we owe you one.” He smiled and nodded.

“Just make sure you have fun for all of us, alright?”

“Alright. See you all Monday morning.” Your flight there was Thursday night, Rehearsal dinner was Friday, Wedding on Saturday, and then Sunday. Glorious sunday was freetime with a flight home after dinner. That was the time you were looking forward to the most.

Sonny insisted on carrying both suitcases downstairs and into the cab, and again when you got to the airport.

“We’re meeting my brother at the gate.” You informed him, “give me my bag.”

“A gentleman never lets his lady carry her bag.” He smirked.

The elderly lady ahead of you on the escalator turned her head and smiled. You felt yourself flush. Being Sonny’s girlfriend was the hardest undercover work you’d ever been tasked. You were far past ‘in over your head’ and it was way too late to turn back.

“Y/N!” A familiar voice called across the crowded room full of chairs that were full of families with screaming children heading on vacation.

“Cody,” You breathed, “That’s my brother.”

“I think I could take him,” Sonny joked and you laughed.

“I think you could too.”

You got to your brother and his shiny trophy wife and the man threw his arms around you in a hug you’d think you’d give to someone you actually spent time with. She hugged you next and you awkwardly accepted it patting her back.

“So good to see you!” She squealed, “I’m so excited for the wedding! It’s going to be lovely don’t you think.”

“Oh, sure.”

“Aren’t you going to introduce us?” Your brother asked, eyes trained on Sonny who was still holding tightly to both of your bags.

“Right. Cody and Anna this is Sonny, Sonny this is my brother and his wife.” Cody was the oldest of the siblings and to your parents he was the most perfect. Straight As, football star all American golden boy and all that bullshit. Now he was a doctor and had some pretty wife and a nice car and a big house. Still the perfect son. It was a large ego to live beside and your parents often had trouble seeing past him. Unless it was to point out something you could be doing to be more like him.

“The boyfriend,” Cody extended a hand signature condescending smile in place.

“Yup!” Sonny grinned back genuinely and took the hand shaking it, “Pleasure to meet you,” He then turned to Anna and extended his hand to her as well, “and you too.” She didn’t take the hand but she managed a polite nod and a smile. You watched Sonny drop his hand to his side, grin not faltering as he nudged you slightly.

“Ready?” You nodded stiffly and collapsed into a chair to wait, Sonny settling in at your side and your brother and his witch of a wife perching on your other side.

“Sonny what do you do for work?” Your brother asked across you and Sonny threw an arm around your shoulder as he turned to talk.

“I’m a detective with Y/N, it’s how we met.” Your brother was better at hiding his judgment but his wife pulled a face.

“Two detective salaries, it’ll be hard to continue living in New York, especially if you want a family.”

“Oh god,” You grumbled, briefly pinching the bridge of your nose. Sonny moved his hand to rub small and comforting circles into your neck with a good natured laugh.

“We’re a bit away from all of that I think,” You sat there impressed as Sonny continued to answer questions and dodge backhanded remarks with such a positive air. If this interrogation had been directed at you, you’d have snapped already and been accused of being in a bad mood like always. You weren’t always in a bad mood, they just always managed to put you there. But Sonny was an expert.

“So how long have you been dating?” Anna asked.

“About six months.” Sonny replied and you began to try and do the mental math.

“I thought you told mom you felt like things were getting serious about six months ago.” Cody started, turning to look at you. /Shit./

“Well that’s when I officially asked her to be my girlfriend, We’d been seeing each other for a couple months before that.” Sonny easily saved, using his free hand to brush some hair from your face. “I couldn’t believe my luck, I didn’t want to ask too soon and break the spell.” You flushed. Suddenly you needed to get out of there.

“Flight 307 to Treasure Cay Airport boarding in ten minutes.” The flight attendant announced. You stood suddenly.

“I have to use the bathroom.” Before the She Devil could offer to join you you were off. Ten minutes, you had ten minutes to get yourself under control. You got to the bathroom and almost fell into a stall, closing it and locking it before taking deep gulping breaths. You shouldn’t have done this. Why did he have to be so good at this? A fake boyfriend for the weekend shouldn’t be making you feel more loved then any of your previous relationships combined. You shouldn’t love Sonny and you shouldn’t be tricking yourself into thinking he loves you too. After several more deep breaths you left the stall and washed your face in the sink. “I can do this,” You told yourself, “I can do this.” You straightened your back and did your best to look casual as you returned to your group waiting to board.

You thanked god your brother had opted for more expensive seats and that that meant they were not sitting with you. Sonny ‘let you take the window’ as he put it, but you both know he wanted the isle for his long legs. You were fine with it, as long as he was fine with you crawling over him to pee. He said he was.

“Your brother is..”

“A piece of work? Wait no, that’s his wife. My brother is just an asshole.” Sonny chuckled.

“I wasn’t going to use that word but since you said it… he is a bit ass-y.”

“I’m sorry. It’s going to get worse. They scared off all my boyfriends I had when I was still living at home.” Not that he was really your boyfriend.

“I’ll be fine, I’m good at being questioned, my ma is italian all she does is ask me things.”

After that you put on the sleep mask you’d bought for the occasion and tried to get some sleep. You’d get to the hotel late and would probably only have time to eat and then go to sleep since you had to be up early, so might as well nap now. Next thing you knew someone was making an announcement and someone else was fiddling with something in your lap. You woke up more at that, hand going out and head jerking up off the thing it had been resting on.

“I’m sorry.” Sonny. You lifted a hand and lifted the sleep mask looking around groggily. Sonny was currently trying to do your seatbelt with one hand, the other hand belonged to the arm wrapped around you. And the surface you’d been resting your head on had in fact been his shoulder.

“ ‘M sorry,” You murmured sitting up more.

“I didn’t want to wake you up until I had to, you were out cold.”

“I’m okay, thank you,” You yawned. He didn’t have to buckle you, or let you sleep, or let you rest on him, your brother was nowhere to be found. And yet he did it anyway? You sat up fully and stretched before dropping your hand to fiddle with your own buckle, getting it done. When you looked up Sonny was watching you, his own face tired, but there was something else in his eyes.

“What?” You asked.

“Can’t I look at you?” He asked grinning and you rolled your eyes.

“Nope. Never actually.” Sonny laughed at that, and the plane shuddered slightly as you began what felt like a descent into hell.

---

@impossibleblizzardstudentposts

[mimssides]

Life on Crow Avenue: Part 16

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___

Remus had researched PTSD, ADHD, depression and anxiety. He had started doing so a few months after the car crash, when he had noticed the changes in Roman’s behaviour. And as he did so he had seen the changes within himself as well. He had noticed patterns which were new, feelings that started to disappear.

Quite honestly, Logan was impressed. Impressed by Remus’s sharp perception. By his own introspection and his findings. And the fact that he was critical of his own analysis and tried to not be too wrapped up in them.

What had Logan worried though was how often Remus mentioned his fear and worries about Roman. How much seemed to be focused on him and not on Remus himself. And while Remus’s worries might have been warranted, Logan knew that he could not only focus on Roman. That he needed to look after himself.

Carefully, Logan tried to steer the conversation in a direction, where he could talk about Remus’s fixation on Roman. As Remus mentioned once more how long it took Roman to even mention the accident after it had happened, Logan took his chance and said: “I understand Roman is important to you, but he is not the only person to worry about.”

“It’s hard not to worry about him… He – He struggles a lot and he doesn’t admit most of it. I know I’m not one to talk about my mental health either but he’s in deep denial and-” Remus said but was interrupted by Logan.

“I understand your concerns, Remus,” Logan reassured Remus not wanting to talk his worries down, “I truly do. And I know your brother is fighting with a lot as well but maybe you might need to stand back a bit from him. Not abandon or leave him. But you need to take care of yourself first and you cannot do so if you are constantly worrying and playing therapist for Roman as well. You can only do so much for him. And he is a grown-up too. You need to trust him and make the right decisions for himself.”

Logan watched Remus run his fingers through his hair. He was thinking of a fitting retort but Logan knew he was right and that Remus was indeed smart enough to know that too. He just had to admit it to himself.

“Yes, right but I don’t think he always makes the right decisions for himself…” Remus argued weakly.

“That might be true but it is not your responsibility to fix that. You cannot support him so much that it exhausts you, Remus. You need to learn to have boundaries and let other people take over.”

Logan knew that his advice was a lot harder to follow through than it sounded. He knew Remus would struggle. He knew he would not know what healthy boundaries felt like at the beginning of all of it. He knew he would not trust anybody to take care of his brother at first.

“… then would you help me get him into therapy, if I were to go to therapy?”

Not the offer Logan had expected. Not at all. But it was quite welcome.

“If you go, I certainly would try and help you convince him,” Logan said carefully watching Remus’s reaction.

He was tense. His shoulders stiff and his hands twitching minimally, almost too unremarkably to notice. But as he was breathing in and out his eyes began to focus. Began to focus on Logan he met Logan’s eyes evenly with a gulp. There was something so incredibly intense and real about him in that very moment. So much energy and force just peeking out for the fraction of a second and Logan did not know what to think of it.

“Thank you. You’re a really good man.”

Remus’s voice was warm and far more trusting than it was ought to be. But Logan did not get to muse about that. Remus was taking his phone and checked the time, making a surprised expression for a moment. Then he shot shy look to Logan.

“Would you mind us checking in on Ro and the J-man? We’ve been talking for a good hour or so and I think I want to make sure how they are doing. There’s only so much they can be doing in a greenhouse for so long and I don’t think they’ll start fucking anytime soon,” Remus finished with a shrug.

Logan let out a huff and answered with an eyeroll: “Don’t underestimate Janus’s ‘seducing’ skills.”

“Don’t underestimate my Roman’s need for a slow burn romance. This kind of fuckery isn’t up to his standards, trust me, bicho.”

Logan tried to overhear the nickname once more by steering the conversation into a new direction: “Where exactly do you have a greenhouse? I was not aware that you had one on the lot.”

“Backyard. It was already part of the building and we have a small collection of flowers there. Actually, do you think Patton would like to see that? Like, he loves colourful stuff, right? Do you think he would - would like to check it out with us?”

Adorable.

Wait. No. Remus was not adorable. The way he asked Logan if they should invite Patton to see the greenhouse was maybe a little endearing. But not cute. Decidedly not adorable.

Clearing his throat, Logan got up from his chair and said: “I think he would appreciate the invitation. I can text him and he might join us downstairs?”

Remus smiled wildly and nodded as he got up himself. Logan put on a forced smile and sent Patton a text, while he and Remus started to get out of the flat climbing down the stairs. Logan was lucky, for once in his life Patton had already seen his text and answered quickly that he would be outside in a minute. Logan told Remus so much and both men got outside to wait for the third one to join them.

___

Roman had not been kidding when he told Janus that he had a very low alcohol tolerance. The small amount of rest alcohol in one can of alcohol-free beer had been enough to get him tipsy. Which was why Janus now knew that Roman got giggly and rather affectionate while slightly inebriated. The tall man was laying to his feet, constantly reaching for the seams of Janus’s pants and mumbling little nothings to himself.

It was somehow endearing seeing him so soft and unapologetically warm hearted. At the same time Janus did not feel entitled to see him like this. To see him in such a moment of vulnerability despite Roman having chosen to drink in his presence. It just rubbed him the wrong way.

Janus’s phone buzzed and he quickly took it out to see a message from Virgil where he was at.

“Who’s it? You’re frowning.”

Janus looked down to Roman who was holding onto the bottom of his pant leg after having asked his question.

Janus couldn’t help himself but answered gently as he would to one of his younger nephews or nieces when they asked him things: “Virgil wants to know where I am. He probably wants me to come home soon.”

“Tell him he can come over. Wait, I’ll write him myself,” Roman promptly replied and took out his phone from one of his pockets.

Janus wanted to intervene when just then the backdoor to the store opened and Remus, Logan and Patton emerged. Both Logan and Patton were rather taken aback by the amazing visuals of the greenhouse while Remus obviously looked around for Roman. They entered the greenhouse and Janus waved at Patton, who waved back happily before his eyes fell down on Roman lying on the floor.

“Did you have to?” Remus moaned as he saw the beer cans and walked up to Roman.

Softly Remus kicked Roman into the side, to which Roman barely reacted as he was still focused on his phone.

“Roman!” Remus said with more emphasis and Roman finally put his phone down and looked up to Remus.

“I only had one. And I’m not taking more. Just one. I swear!” he defended himself and Remus rolled his eyes.

Begrudged Remus stretched his hand out to Roman, as offer to help him up. Yet Roman did not budge and Remus sighed. He could be such a little shit when he wanted to. Annoyed Remus turned away and threw his hands in the air while mumbling something under his breath.

Meanwhile Patton and Logan came further inside the greenhouse and Patton steered towards Janus. They exchanged a look and wordlessly Patton motioned towards Roman to which Janus only shrugged and then looked back down to Roman, who was putting away his phone.

“Virgil’s coming over by the way,” Roman declared and turned a little to face Remus more clearly.

Remus just groaned and scratched his forehead while Roman giggled a little. Janus was simply amazed. By the fact that Roman had managed to convince Virgil to come over and by the fact that he was so nonchalant and carefree about it. It was so strange seeing the otherwise so prideful man present himself so silly and undignified.

“Okay, please stand up because we have guests. Can we do that?” Remus tried once more to get Roman to stand up.

With a frown Roman finally sat up and looked over to Patton and Logan with a wide grin. Patton gave him a confused wave while Logan just furrowed his brows and looked over to Remus in slight confusion. Remus just massaged his temples and shot Janus a venomous look before suddenly a thought crossed his mind.

“I didn’t do anything to deserve that look!” Janus shortly interrupted Remus’s thought process.

Remus just shot him a look and waved him off with a quick: “Well, you don’t have to deal with him tonight when he needs to go to bed. Do you know how energized he’s now? He’s got the idiocy and determination to try and walk up walls! But that probably doesn’t matter to Jazz Daddy.”

Hearing the nick name Janus scrunched his nose in disgust to which Remus just retorted with a little giggle and shifted his attention back to Roman. Quickly Remus crouched down a bit to get on Roman’s eye level, who now suspiciously stared at him. Roman could almost sense his brother’s inpatient energy and felt himself starting to fumble with the seams of his pants.

“So, I need you to tire yourself out. Otherwise I’ll lose my mind trying to get you to bed tonight,” Remus started while watching his brother making the most offended pouty face he could. “So, I thought you might wanna sing? Disney?”

There was a visible shot of energy rushing through Roman’s eyes before something clouded the sudden excitement and the man looked down to the floor. Remus put his hand on Romans shoulder and he glanced up at him again.

“My voice is shitty right now. After crying and all,” Roman meekly said while holding his hand against his throat.

Remus raised an eyebrow.

“Look at me and tell me that you actually care enough to not sing right now.”

“… I kinda don’t care…”

Remus nodded and stood back up with a grin. He chuckled a bit and said to Roman: “That’s what I thought. Go and let Virgil inside, while I get the speaker.”

Just a second after Roman agilely jumped onto his feet and patted down his pants before marching outside the greenhouse into to the store to open the door for Virgil when he came. Remus just shook his head and then walked to the other side of the greenhouse where they had a different gardening tools stored in a wooden box.

Quietly Remus began to rummage through the box and turned back to the three other men after a while. He held a little green Bluetooth speaker in his hands and turned it on to connect it with his phone. Staring down on the screen he sighed and walked over them.

“Sorry, for the accusation Jan,” Remus said at once while the speaker beeped signalling it had connected to the phone. “I know you’re not responsible, he’s his own man and all. I’m just. I’m very exhausted.”

Remus lifted his gaze from the phone and shot Janus a look before he sat down on the chair next to Janus. Quickly he waved for Logan and Patton to take a seat as well, Logan taking the last chair while Patton sat down on a wooden crate. All three watched Remus and when he sat his elbow down on the little table and laid his head in his hand Patton leaned over to him and softly patted his back.

A shudder ran down Remus’s spine and he hastily looked up to Patton. Patton looked like he wanted to pull back but Remus held onto his arm before he could do so and looked back down to the floor. Patton watched him and continued to draw circles on Remus’s back. It was a little concerning how stiff he felt and how much he leaned into the contact. But Patton was considerate enough to not mention it.

“He just gets a little much when he’s drunk,” Remus said suddenly and looked straight forward not focusing on anyone next to him. “And loud. And it’s nothing bad or horrible but I’m just worn out. By – by feeling so much. So fucking much. I don’t know how he can do it all day everyday…”

What to say to a statement like that? What to say to a man like Remus after such a long day? Neither knew and somehow, they all felt relieved when he exhaled and straightened his back, lips slowly forming a smirk. Mischievously, he glanced over to Janus who felt a sense of threat overcome him.

“You didn’t hear him sing before, right?”

Janus furrowed his brows and said cautiously: “No, when would I have had the chance?”

Remus chuckled and rolled his shoulders amused.

“Boy you’re in for a ride then!” Remus laughed and before the others could ask what he meant Roman came back with Virgil in tow.

The two came inside the greenhouse and a few words were exchanged before Virgil settled down on the box beside Patton and Remus and Roman had a small dispute about which Disney playlist Remus should put on, after which the discussion about which language Roman should sing them in followed. The choice fell on the Happy-Go-Lucky playlist in English and Roman walked a little away from the table to have more room to move around. Then looked back to the group and shot Janus a short glance before he batted his lashes and gave Remus the thumbs up for him to press the play button.

And with that the music began to play. A soft melody started and just a few moments in Roman began to beam. A second after he began to sing:

“I have often dreamed, of a far-off place Where a hero's welcome, would be waiting for me Where the crowds will cheer, when they see my face And a voice keeps saying, ‘This is where I'm meant to be’”

Roman continued, eyes closed, feet moving softly to the words and hands following the picture he painted with his voice flawlessly. It wasn’t perfect by any means, on some notes he let himself linger a little too long, some of the higher notes scratched a little as he sang them but watching him perform, watching Roman engulf himself completely in this song was quite spectacular. Spectacular in a way that one forgot that they sat in a greenhouse. Spectacular in a way that one forgot that the singer was florist. Spectacular in a way that one forgot that their nephew had a phone with which he could make pictures to bribe one later on.

Remus leaned back enjoying his brother’s little show. He watched how Logan’s surprise slowly ebbed away and how he watched his brother quite interested. Patton was bobbing his head along with a big smile and Virgil did so as well after he had taken a picture of Janus.

Janus who was completely thrown off guard by Roman’s flair and stage presence. Well, greenhouse presence but Remus believed that Janus didn’t care that much about it, not when he sometimes got to look at Romans wide grin and almost glowing eyes from all the excitement and joy just to be able to performing in front of a few people.

The song ended and Roman gave a little bow to which Patton clapped enthusiastically, making the others join him out of amusement. The next song started just right after and after a few beats the all recognized “A Spoonful of Sugar”. With just as much enthusiasm Roman began to sing the song, while his mimic and movements adjusted to the mood of the song.

Halfway in, Remus heard a second voice slightly humming and mouthing the words. Unsure where it came from, he looked into the round and found that it was Patton who slowly began to join Roman in his singing to the amusement of Virgil next to him. Remus couldn’t help himself but smiled at Patton’s happy face while more and more joining the song despite missing a few words then and when.

Remus found himself admiring the small singing attempts and didn’t notice how Roman as well caught onto Patton’s singing and walked towards him before the song ended. As it did Roman stretched his hand out for Patton and asked with a wide smile: “Wanna join me? You seem to have fun.”

“Oh gosh,” Patton said flustered and rubbed the back of his neck, “I’m by far not as good as you. I don’t want to ruin your singing.”

“Not good? How does that matter now! This is just for us and singing with people is awesome! Just join me!”

Roman was energetic and optimistic and despite Patton’s reservations he got up and joined Roman reluctantly beginning to sing as “Bare Necessities” began to play.

Remus was amazed. Patton was not one for showmanship but he adapted and matched Roman’s energy with seemingly no effort. His voice was raspier than Roman’s, some notes he sang sounded scruffy but the joy he found after getting over the first inhibitions was mesmerizing to him. The way he giggled over the words he missed or when he forgot to join Roman in a line because he got distracted watching him, was just too admirable to not smile at.

The next song that came was “Under the Sea”. And it was the song where Roman decided Patton should dance with him. After a short-lived protest of Patton Roman took him by the hands and began leading Patton a little. It took them a moment to figure out what worked with the music and their skills but then they somehow fell into a rhythm and Roman even managed to spin Patton around once, which led to the latter having a laughing fit.

Logan smiled at Patton’s blush and Roman’s childish excitement. Patton was not one to move around often and his dancing was a little stiff while Roman made quite a good figure in the whole process. He moved in steady flow, quick, charming and joyful. And in a way Patton’s clumsiness but genuine effort complimented the impromptu dancing session.

They continued dancing when the next song began, “Be Our Guest”, and Logan thought about the chubby boy, always wearing light blue polo shirts and trying to not stand out too much back from high school. Young Patton would never have dared to stand out like this. To dance and sing like this. To have cyan hair and colourful tattoos. To be amongst other queer people and be proud of it.

Roman might have had similar fears and reservations, Logan assumed concluding from what Remus had told him, but right in this setting it seemed as if they did not matter to him that much. It seemed he was quite content and happy with himself and this kind of confidence helped Patton relax as well.

It truly was endearing, Logan admitted to himself and looked to the others. Remus and Janus were very obviously love-struck by Patton and Roman respectively and Logan just rolled his eyes at that. What was to expect from two dramatic queer men in love? Lastly his look landed on Virgil, who amused raised his eyebrows at his uncle to which Logan responded with a mocking eye roll.

More songs came; “Almost There”, “Friend Like Me”, “Hakuna Matata” and “You’re Welcome”. The mood was light but the evening got older and they had to get to bed for tomorrow. To open their respective stores and a Goodbyes were exchanged.

It wasn’t lost on Logan how reluctantly Janus parted from Roman, how soft his otherwise ever so cool look was. Neither was it lost on him how surprised Remus was when Patton hugged him as a goodbye, and how grateful he looked at Logan when he wished him a good night.

It had been a heavy evening but the end was rather sweet. Especially considering why everything had started so solemnly. Nevertheless, Logan found himself cautiously optimistic when he wished Patton a good night as he walked up the stairs into his own apartment. Hopefully, Remus could take the advice he had given him and hopefully this would not be the last night they had had fun together.

___

It was almost an hour later, Roman had showered while Remus would do so in the morning. Both had put on their pyjamas and were now laying in Remus’s bed. Roman had offered to leave him alone, had said that his ask from before was not fair and that he trusted Remus enough to stay in his bed alone overnight. But Remus let him come into his room and sleep beside him. It was less lonely and somehow, he felt saver with Roman around. And he knew that Roman shared the sentiment.

They turned of the light and Remus laid there between the wall and Roman’s back staring at the ceiling. He was unsure what today had been. He was unsure how he should sleep.

The light was flicked on and Remus blinked against the sudden brightness. Roman moved and turned to face him already signing.

“So, why are you not sleeping?” Roman signed

With a sigh Remus retorted: “Why are you not sleeping is the better question. You can always sleep.”

I can. But I’m keeping myself awake to figure out why you’re not sleeping yet. ‘Cause I’m a good brother.”

“Sure-” Remus rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest – “You won’t turn off the light until I answer right?”

“Correct,” Roman signed with a fat smile on his face.

“Shit.”

“Shit indeed. What is it?”

After a moment of hesitation Remus said: “You know Pat.”

“In fact, I do. I sang and danced with him like not even an hour ago.”

“Yeah. Right. You were doing that.”

Remus noisily gulped and felt himself already getting flustered.

Roman sat up and wiggled his eyebrows teasingly while signing: “Oh?”

Desperately Remus buried his face in his hands and moaned: “Yes, oh. Like fuck-me-he-is-so-adorable-and-wonderful-and-in-need-to-fucking-hold-him-in-my-arms-in-this-very-instance oh. The kind of oh like, like in the stupid love-on-the-first-sight looks! The ultimate fucking I’ve fallen far too quickly for this adorable, kind, wonderful and stupidly caring pastel punk oh!”

Roman shook him at the arm and Remus glanced through his fingers to see him smiling widely while once again sighing: “Oh!”

“And to make it even worse-” Remus gave up trying to protect his dignity – “The nerd is just as bad! Like, he is very awkward but I totally get it and know what he means and now I have the feeling that he’s, he’s kinda impressed with the things I know and fucking- fucking cares about what I say? And it’s confusing and stupid and so freaking HOt, Roman! He’s so hot and I don’t know what to do with that!”

Roman laughed a bit and then laid back down.

Gently he signed then: “Well, I don’t know either but for the first time in ages I think your crushes are not the shadiest people I’ve ever met in my life so you have my blessing! I’ve you’re in need of a wingman, or best man, I’ll be your man!”

Remus rolled his eyes.

“Thanks, oh most gracious Roman.”

“You’re welcome my trashy brother dearest,” Roman retorted with a triumphant smile.

At once Remus had a thought and began to grin. That might be a good way to get a payback from his far too cocky brother.

“Talking of shady people though…” Remus began and watched the unsuspecting face of Roman.

“Yeah?”

“Janus is possibly the shadiest man you’ve ever fallen for, you know?”

Now it was Roman’s time to fluster. Defensively he sat up again and signed agitatedly: “Hey! He’s not that shady! He just – just looks a little shady. But he’s, he’s very cute. And patient. And being around him is very easy, you know? Like he just accepts what I throw at him and goes with it. Just. Just takes me as I come. It’s nice. Really nice.”

Remus smiled a little and let out a soft laugh as he glanced at Roman smiling and clearly thinking about the Jazz man.

“… You know what?” Remus said eventually.

“What?”

“He has my blessing. If you wanna fuck him you might continue. I won’t threaten him or cockblock you again.”

“You’re stupid,” Roman said and shoved him with a half-hearted offence.

“You’re welcome.”

“… Thank you. I really like him.”

“I get it. He’s classy.”

“Yeah, and Pat’s fun. And Lo might actually be able to match your fucking intellect. He’s smart.”

“Mhm.”

“Yeah… Ready to sleep now?”

“I’ll try. Te quiero.”

“También te quiero. Sleep well.”

Remus made an agreeing noise and Roman turned the light back off. After a few minutes Remus felt how Roman put his arm around him and how the weight and warmth slowly lulled him to sleep. Surprisingly he would have a rather regenerating nights rest for once.

___

@varthandi

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