#i want to talk about duras

[nuooage]

[glidingsilvery]

69th San Sebastian Film Festival

(📷 Gari Garaialde)

[toshkakoshka]

ingraining this in my mind forever

[danobaggins]

"tu vais amar-me toda a tua vida. porque vou morrer muito mais cedo do que tu, daqui a pouco tempo, e porque a nossa grande diferença de idades funciona como tranquilizante do teu enorme pânico de enfrentares uma mulher."

[iluvjeffbuckley]

And I’ll always have regrets for everything I do, everything I’ve gained, everything I’ve lost…

— ‘The Lover,’ Marguerite Duras 🪷

[nikikikiko]

ok we did some cooking here

AFK Arena - Forbidden Family Odyssey AU !

Premise:

The Invasion upon Gavus and Eugene's family home proved... semi-successful. Eugene had been captured, and Liberta was acquired quickly by the Goddess, Morgana, but Gavus managed to escape with Lucilla. 10 years later, imprisoned, Eugene catches wind of a suspicious lack of guards. Using his wits, and some of his power, Eugene broke out and began his run for home.

Unluckily... He runs right into a Commander Dawn and the kid's Adventurer companion, and that's only the START of his bad luck on this journey. Let's hope that this journey home doesn't take a ridiculously long time! (It does.) (Horrendously so.)

--

So !!! AU time !!!

Eugene (and somewhat Liberta) - Odysseus's role

Gavus - Penelope

Lucilla - Telemachus

The idea is that Eugene and Liberta were both taken when Conrad and Morgana made an... oh-so "civil" visit to the family home. Liberta, who has no memories unsealed because he never fought Lucilla, is taking the company of soldiers back home with the Adventurer he befriended when they run into Eugene. After a brief fight, Liberta and the Adventurer put 2 and 2 together and realize this is the same Eugene from the diary, and they propose to help him get home (much to the issue of .... literally every soldier there but that comes up later<3)

Essentially, this AU will focus on four-ish storylines... sort of?:

Eugene's story on getting home, his journey back to his family and all the perils it will have.

Liberta's story on finding out who he is, because Lucilla never fought Liberta, undoing the seal is taking a long ass time. He will be named "Commander Dawn" until a certain point in this AU

Gavus's story on protecting Lucilla, since the Hypogeans didn't really stop after they didn't get their Weapon.

Lucilla's story on finding out where her brother and father are, since she wants to see her papa happy again, and he's always looking mournfully at a red diary.

Will I make a fanfic ??? Possibly !!! It's sitting in my mind a lot and I have a bit of the story figured out, but I also might just leave this as a Tumblr-only AU where I just occasionally post content for it instead depending on where my whims take me.

Now, there is a whole lot more planned out for this AU [just not... indetail bUT I HAVE BARE BONES] so if you have any questions, I am more than happy to answer!

take this concept eugene art as compensation for ur time

thank you!

[coldfanbou]

Saleswoman

Who would've thought Yuna made a good saleswoman...Well, I would have. Anyway, here's the fic for the week; originally, I was thinking of doing a Yuna gangbang fic, but then Eros presented a saleswoman concept I liked in a writer discord and thought would be easier than a gangbang.

Length 2.1K

Yuna X Mreader

Having seen good reviews about the new mattress store, you look up the location. Your mattress has had a depression in it after years of use, and you needed another. The reviews praise the staff for their help in deciding. You set aside time to head out, ensuring you researched the different types of beds beforehand. You arrive at the store just a few minutes after they open; you take in the grand scale of it. You next notice how empty it was, considering the many reviews you thought the store would be full. You don’t even see any workers as you walk through. 

Shaking your head, you move through the store and look at all the different bed models. They had various kinds of technology, all meant to aid sleep, or so they claimed. You tested a few beds laying on them to see how they felt. You had decided beforehand you wanted something that was a little firmer, so you focused on those. As you tested another out, you shut your eyes, imagining what it would be like to sleep on it for years. This one was too firm, having very little give. You open your eyes to see the face of a young woman staring back at you. “Hi! Welcome!” She greets you. You jump, shocked that you hadn’t noticed her walk up to you. “Oh, sorry for scaring you. My name is Yuna, and I’ll be your special aid today.” She says with a wide grin. You look the woman over as she fixes her hair. Yuna didn’t look like someone who worked her. She wore a white sleeveless crop top from a nearby university and matching white shorts. Her red hair stood out against her clothing, attracting attention to her face. 

“I saw you lay on a few models. Did any of them interest you further?” Yuna asks, her hand behind her back as she listens to your response.

“Well, there was the smart bed and one over there.” You say, pointing out a mattress that wasn’t too firm or soft. “The second one is what I’m leaning toward. It’s a lot cheaper.”

“That’s true, sir, but the smart bed is much better for your sleep and other activities.” She states. 

You find her comment odd, “Other activities?” It takes you a moment to connect the dots; when you realize what Yuna meant, she nods.

“Yes, sir. I did mean that.” She states, “Now, if you’d like to test them out, please follow me.”

“But I already did.” You’re confused again, not understanding what she means.

“For the…other activities. You need to follow me.” Yuna says, walking ahead of you. She checks to make sure you are following her, smirking as she sees you are. Yuna stops at a door at the end of the building, picking up a mounted phone. “Hello? Yes, we’d like to test out the Genie smart bed and the Dura hard mattress. Okay, thank you.” Yuna hangs up and spins around on her heel. It’ll be just a moment; they have to set everything up. You see the hunger in her eyes as she looks you up and down. She licks her lips and smiles at you. “I’m sure you’ll like the Dura brand, but the smart bed is the way to go. I’m sure your girlfriend would love it.”

“I don’t have a girlfriend.” You respond, fixing Yuna’s error. “Why do you recommend it so much?”

“It has a lot of nice features; I can show you soon,” Yuna says just as the phone on the wall rings. She picks it up, talks to the other person on the line, and grows her smile as she places the phone back on the hook. “Everything is ready; please come in.” Yuna opens the door; the room is decorated like any regular bedroom, with only one thing standing out: both beds you had been thinking about were set up in the middle. Yuna grabs your hands, taking you to the cheaper bed, placing her hands on your chest, and pushing you onto it. She lifts her shirt, her perky breasts bouncing slightly. “First one of the day,” Yuna whispers to herself as she places a hand on your crotch. You’re taken aback at her advances but willing to go along with it. You wouldn't, couldn’t deny her. She feels your bulge grow larger, her eyes widening for a moment as her lustful smile appears.

She unbuttons your jeans, pulling them down. Yuna giggles as she sees your bulge being held back by your underwear. She bends over, planting a kiss on your cock through your underwear, “You’re so big,” She says with a giggle. Yuna pulls at the hem of your underwear, feigning shock as your cock pops out. You see her shining teeth as she smiles and grasps your cock. She strokes it gently, watching it fully harden in her hand. Yuna kisses the tip of your cock before tracing her lips with your cock.

You grunt her name; her warm lips surround the head, wrapping around it as her tongue moves across it at an agonizing pace. You’re squirming, wanting her to do more. “Relax, baby. I’ll give you what you want in a minute.” She says, her hand pumping your cock as she moves closer to your ear. “Once your cock is in my pussy, you’ll see who I really am.” Yuna’s low, sultry voice sends shivers down your spine. She runs a finger down your chest until she returns to your cock, her lips pressing against it before separating and taking you in. Her tongue runs along the underside of your cock, slowly moving from side to side as she strokes the base of your cock. 

“How are you so good?” You moan out, throwing your head back as she takes more of you into her mouth. Yuna ignores your question for the moment, too focused on your cock to answer. Your hips buck, sending your cock into the back of her throat, surprising Yuna. 

She pulls back, her saliva dripping onto your cock. “Ah, if you wanted more, you could have just said so.” She pushes herself back onto your cock, making it disappear. You feel Yuna’s throat tighten around the head. You fall back onto the bed, lying down as you explode in Yuna’s mouth, sending waves of cum down her throat. Yuna’s cheeks fill with your semen, puffing up as she pulls away. You sit up slowly, watching her as she lowers her jaw to reveal a mouthful of cum. Yuna swallows it, moaning slightly as she revels in the salty taste. 

Yuna takes a step back, undoing the button on her shorts and pulling them down, shivering as the cold air hits her cleanly shaven pussy. “Move back a little.” You follow her orders, centering yourself on the bed. Yuna crawls over you, her modest breasts swaying. She reaches down, grabs your cock, and runs it between her wet folds. Yuna’s soft moans arouse you further, making you want her more. She Presses the head against her entrance, slowly dropping on it. She takes a deep breath, groaning as she feels your cock stretching her. Yuna places one hand on her lower abdomen, feeling your cock make its way through her until it knocks against her womb. “You’re tearing me apart,” She whimpers. “I need a moment.” Yuna focuses on the sensation caused by your cock. 

You sit under her, desperate for more, her tight cunt feeling too good to just sit there. You grab her hips and begin thrusting, surprising Yuna. “I’m sorry, but I need you.” You moan, thrusting into her quickly. Yuna places her hands on your chest, trying not to collapse on top of you as you split her apart. You catch her expression, her furrowed brows and shut eyes showing slight discomfort as you knock against her womb. Yuna’s expression soon softens as the pleasure overcomes her. 

Yuna’s moans echo in the room; her head tilts back. She looks to the ceiling as she feels her climax approaching. “I’m gonna cum.” She mumbles. You were still a little ways away from your climax. You speed up your thrusts, trying to cum with her. Yuna felt your cock piston in and out of her; she felt like a toy being used and was loving it. A delighted smile appears on her face as she cums on your cock, her walls tightening around you as you continue to ruin her. The young woman’s strength gives out, sending her onto your chest as you near your climax. She mumbles something; it’s inaudible initially, but Yuna repeats herself. “Cum- cum in me,” she says. You moan Yuna’s name, repeating it as you impale her and shoot your cum into her pussy.

You feel Yuna’s walls milking you for your cum as you both start to relax. She stretches out her hand, pointing to the other bed. She gulps softly, saying, “We have to try out the other one.” You nod your head, already tired. Running your hands along her back, Yuna shudders as she feels your hands come to a stop on her ass. You sit up, struggling slightly as you move over to the other bed with Yuna still having your cock inside her. She grabs a remote and holds down one of the buttons, causing the back to raise and letting you be in more of a seated position. You found it convenient. Yuna gives you a dreamy smile as she tosses the remote and begins moving. 

You’re seated position puts you much closer to Yuna’s breasts. You notice now her small brown nipples; they move softly as Yuna bounces on your cock. You lean in, dragging your tongue over one slowly, flicking it with your tongue at the end. She gasps, and her body shivers at your tongue's warmth. 

“W- What do you think?” Yuna mumbles as she rides you like her life depended on it, her walls squeezing you as you hit her womb. You can tell Yuna is trying to speak more, but the pleasure she’s receiving is making it difficult. Moans flow out from her as her walls tighten around you again. Yuna could give you no warning as she came. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as she reached her second orgasm; her voice was becoming hoarse from her moans.

You get Yuna off you, laying her beside you. The moment you do, she turns to you, “You didn’t cum.” She says softly. “I want to feel your cum.” Yuna’s hand slithers down her body, spreading her lips for you. You stare at her glistening pussy, it makes you hard, and you find yourself unable to resist Yuna’s invitation. She grabs the remote, lowering the bed back to its original position. “There, easier for you.” She says, licking her lips as she imagines you inside her again. “Go on, fuck me.”You align yourself with her cunt and push in quickly, feeling like you’re being sucked in.  Yuna’s moans bounce off the walls, fueling you to start thrusting. You lift her hips off the bed, giving yourself a better position and allowing you to go deeper into Yuna’s cunt. Each thrust creates a bulge that Yuna presses down on, making her walls tighten around you. Her moans grew louder; she was getting more pleasure out of it, too. Neither of you last long, your quick thrust making you both cum again.  You collapse on top of Yuna, feeling parts of the soft mattress. 

You watch her grab the remote, feeling the bed become firmer. “So what do you think? How was the smart bed? Better, right?” Yuna mutters, slowly regaining her composure as time goes by.

“I think you’re right. It is better.”

“I told you.” She replies, a smile on her face.

You and Yuna hammer out the details as you lay beside each other, your cum oozing out of her cunt, and you end up buying the smart bed. You don’t know if Yuna being naked at the end helped her convince you, but you were buying the bed. Yuna felt satisfied with herself. After you had left, she went to the staff room, skipping all the way there while still naked, happy to have made a good piece of commission on the sale. She showed off, annoying the others as they stood there watching cum run down her legs. You write a review for the store, writing about the helpful staff much like the others before you.

[sweet-child-of-night]

I want to talk about duras (2021)

[threewaywithdelusion]

Alec Lightwood Not Giving a Single Fuck About the Law

(Spoilers! So many spoilers! For everything except Secrets of Blackthorn Hall, because I haven't read it yet)

I'm not too clear on what the Accords say about Shadowhunters policing Downworlders/what Downworlders are not allowed to do. But I'm pretty sure all of these must be illegal (or at least frowned upon):

Not reporting that Magnus started a joke cult that turned in a real cult that was killing people and worshiping a Greater Demon

Letting the person actually running said evil cult go free after they had captured her because he knew the Clave would execute her and even though Shinyun was literally responsible for several murders, he thought she deserved a second chance (and Magnus related to her, and Alec wanted to spare Magnus pain)

Never reporting Elliott of the New York Vampire Clan for literally everything he has done, including biting several Downworlders at a party, having multiple incidents with faerie fruit, "accidentally" biting 17 mundanes while under the influence (including at least one time where Lily had to stop him from killing the mundane in question), and cheating on two Selkies who then caused property damage in a fight with each other

relatedly, not reporting Mordecai, the faerie fruit dealer

(I just love this entire exchange: "As the current head of the New York Institute," Maryse said, with an attempt at firmness, "if there is illegal Downworlder activity happening, it should be reported to me." "I do not talk to Nephilim about Downworlder business," Lily said severely. The Lightwood parents stared at her, and then swung their heads in sync to stare at their son. Lily waved a dismissed hand in their direction. "Except for Alec, he's a special case.")

Watching Juliette, Werewolf Queen of the Buenos Aires Shadow Market, kill a Shadowhunter and just lightly suggest she try to take the Shadowhunters alive (and then not punish her in any way for killing that one guy)

Not reporting that Ragnor Fell had found a realm for the Greater Demon Sammael and also worked for him for a period of time (I don't think the Clave would care that Ragnor didn't had a choice because of the sventhorn)

Suggested in the final battle in Queen of Air and Darkness that an effective way to render opposing Shadowhunters unconscious would be to have vampires bite them and drink enough of their blood that they passed out

Protecting Marcy, the werewolf who transformed at a club during a full moon, and never reporting her for almost revealing the shadow world to Mundanes and injuring several of them

Breaking the Cold Peace several times by visiting several Shadow Markets, interacting with faeries, and pretending not to know about multiple illegal Shadowhunter-faerie relationships (Tian/Jinfeng and Mark/Kieran/Cristina)

Not illegal but probably seen as outrageous by other Shadowhunters:

marrying Magnus in Shadowhunter gold

traipsing into a hell dimension to save Downworlders

letting a vampire (Simon) drink his blood

offering his blood to a different vampire (Lily)

raising a Downworlder child as his own (and also training that child like a Shadowhunter)

raising a Shadowhunter child that has a Downworlder parent

Basically, Alec Lightwood is a badass and the fact that he went from the type of guy who said "sed lex, dura lex" to the man who did all of this is the reason he is one of my favorite characters ever

[nonnieapple]

Can I request for afk journey reinier x reader sfw and nsfw relationship headcanons. Love you work:⁠-⁠)

⛈️⚡️Reinier x g/n!Reader Headcanons⚡️⛈️

• (Reinier x g/n!Reader Headcanons)

• r a t i n g: m a t u r e • 1 4 1 2 w o r d s

• p o s t e d: 10.10.2024 🌧️ navigation

n o t e: thank you~ this was fun to write, i love this guy. he wasn't technically on my req list but i'll allow it, he should've been.

SFW:

• Dating, or even befriending, Reinier would be a miracle and a curse. You'd have to get over the whole... symmetry thing. I've got plenty of ideas and if anyone wants I'll expand on them, but I chose this one. 

• The "Fix This Guy's Perfectionism OCD" route! 

• You, the illustrious and eternally errand-running Magister Merlin, keep running into cases of things being duplicated for symmetry. 

• At first, it wasn't too detrimental. It was a slight bit stressful for the people who had to watch their town statues disappear. With the exception of Lyca, who found it beautiful. Good for her...? 

• Along the way, you met Talene and found the perfectionist culprit- Reinier. His obsession with symmetry ran deep, and even if his arrogance was understandable due to his good looks, his personality made him hideous. 

• Talene had chased him for a while. You ran into her many times more, and eventually, he duplicated buildings and entire towns.

• Reinier needed an intervention.

• How do you do an intervention on a demon? 

• You summon him, of course! 

• With the (totally not coerced) help of a farmer, you made patterns in Ryeham fields. Beautiful patterns, nearly perfect, yet slightly off. 

• Reinier appeared ENRAGED. 

• You had to restrain him, which almost took you and him out in the process. 

• You told him he did not have merely an obsession, but an illness of the mind that humans dealt with, too. (Humans didn't have the power to do the shit he did. Thank Dura for that.) 

• What ensued was the strangest thing you remembered doing. 

• His progress was slow. For the first month, you thought you'd go mad. Not to mention his mysophobia which was also an issue to get through. 

• You were not his therapist, you were his "handler"- keeping a muzzle on him with your magic. Besides celestials, no one was powerful enough to do so. 

• When he made enough progress, he was still himself (annoying & hot), though his murderous and more destructive tendencies were curbed well enough. 

• Point out his mismatched shoes and he will lose it.

• Point out his mismatching colors and he will try to break through the bonds on his magic to kill you. 

• You're not sure how it happened, but along the way, you tripped and fell in "love". 

• At first, it was pure physical attraction. Obvious and cheap. 

• But when you saw the way he admired snowflakes and the "perfect" knit of your clothes, you found him endearing. Make sure not to let him see the snow melt or a hem get frayed- that's a recipe for an episode. 

• Reinier used to be cool due to being a demonic being. Now, with his magic being held back, he accumulates it and it builds up as heat. He can't hold snowflakes anymore.

• You make some out of magic and hang them in his room. 

• His room in the Mystical House is asymmetrical. Exposure therapy and all. The therapist said it'd help him, but he still arranges the furniture weirdly. It can't be helped...

• Reinier LOVES hearing himself talk. He will yap on about actual nonsense and will repeat phrases in a symmetrical way, with perfect rhythm and syllable count. Unfortunately, he has no mouth to cover. 

• The way Reinier fell for you? Well...

• He did not confess until he was several months into living in your house. 

• You had to torture it out of him, going softly first, only asking him how he felt to various insulting answers. You started making his room uneven to piss him off.

• He clawed at your cloak, praying you to stop, and he finally spat out the words like they were poison.

• "Fine! I- gag- well isn't that a pretty word- I... 'like' you!" 

• You put the dresser back to where he had it. "I'm listening."

• "I see, now, that symmetry is not all there is to life. I'll never rid myself of the way I think, but, you're the second best thing to perfection, and I... feel what you humans would call love, towards you."

• You halted, something blooming in your chest. 

• That was the day you got together. You never put much of a label on your relationship. It was beyond simple words. 

• Reinier admires your magic. He says it's organized and the neatest, warmest magic he has ever encountered. Even though you're used to compliment his feel special because that bastard doesn't bother to lie. He supposed that that's what made him gravitate towards you, along with your unending patience and wisdom.

• If you do makeup (especially more artsy things) and mess up even a little, Reinier will offer- no- INSIST on fixing it. You'll usually accept because it's cute and he focuses hard. It's one of the only times he's truly calm. 

• Sometimes he adds different shapes to each side. Each time you celebrate internally. Therapy was worth it!!!

• You have to remind him that people are not less worthy due to being imperfect. If he gets stuck in one of those loops you bring out... The Spray Bottle (which is filled with water but is a reused vintage perfume bottle. You know the one, with the thang) 

• Long after he gets better (but he isn't cured. He's just Like That) you let him out of his quarantine. He'll tag along with you and you only. He doesn't care for other people.

• He's nice to the hamster familiars because if he isn't it's over for him. They're mildly scared of him. 

• If you let him out of his bonds your opponents will be COOKED. 

• And no one wants to mess with a 6'5 tall floating demon anyway...

• If you choose to get gay demon married Berial will try to crash the wedding and Reinier will be a bridezilla. The wedding? Immaculate. His attitude? Spray Bottle worthy. 

• He is terrible at cooking. He will summon an eldritch horror if in the vicinity of a kitchen, and he hates touching food with his hands and is generally sensitive to sensory input. That's why you shower daily and clean the house often, his fear never goes away completely and you accommodate it, sharing some similarities with him in that regard. 

• If you cuddle it has to be symmetrical. You are laying ON HIM and nowhere else, too bad that he's like a rock in softness.

• Hates kids. Too chaotic.

• Everyone is horrified at the pairing of Reinier x Magister Merlin. All that matters is that you're happy. 

• You act like an old couple. Constantly. 

• He might make jewelry for you similar to his if he gets bored. Which is often. 50% of your wardrobe is now created by him, not that you mind. 

• Temesia is especially horrified by your relationship. Dionel isn't surprised, and Valen finds it funny. Talene is glad he's domesticated because she doesn't have to deal with his BS.

• Reinier is all bark and no bite. With you around him, being cruel is not an option.

NSFW:

• The reproductive systems of (most) humans are symmetrical... Which fascinates him.

• He has no mouth, so it's mostly his hands doing the work. 

• Reinier can create genitals for himself if you're into that. He's in control of what they are, but they'll always be demonic in a way- spiked, shaped strangely, segmented, tentacles, etc. 

• If you're into degradation/praise you've met your match. Either dynamic works. 

• His horns look pretty pullable 

• TWO SETS OF ARMS??? TWO SETS OF A-

• Since he's strong and TWO SETS OF ARMS, he could easily hold you up in any way and position, and restrain you easily. Two sets of arms, guys. 

• Since he has claws, I imagine he'd be into scratching you and sadism. It fits his lore.

• Hear me out- he likes bondage, creating patterns out of rope or magic on his partner. Non-sexually, too.

• If he takes longer to work through his mysophobia, he might use magic and not touch you at all to please you. 

• He doesn't have an inherent drive to have sex, he does it for you, and you're the only one who makes him feel any of that attraction and desire.

• As a stickler for rules, he can be rather obedient. 

[cleo30300]

M.A.A.D CITY. CHAPTER FOUR! MONEY TREES.

warnings : mention of drugs (1), violence ( extremely minor ), cursing, arguments.

previous part. | next part.

Knock Knock.

Your knuckles hit the door in a rhythmic pattern, the door to the Morales’ home, that is. You would think that maybe you’d have a key by now since you visit so much, but Ms. Morales doesn’t like you that much, you guess.

There are a few beats of silence before you hear shuffling approach the door and the tired voice of your best friend.

“ Who is it? “, he grunts.

“ Me. “

Miles’ voice doesn’t reach your ears again for a few minutes before he’s sighing and unlocking the door.

The wood swings open to reveal him, Voltron pyjama pants and all. His hair is the same as when you last saw him, a little frizzy at the top, but neat braids brushing his collarbone. He needs a haircut.

“ What’s up? “, he says blankly.

“ You’re not gonna let me in? “

“ I don’t gotta let you in. You don’t live here. “, he stares at you like he can’t believe you just asked that question. Like you just asked for a brick of crack. “ What’s up? “

You’re starting to get a little irritated. Barely any communication for a week and when you show up to see what the deal is, you’re met with a grumpy teenage boy who looks like he’s about to break apart into glass shards.

“ I just wanted to see what you were up to, Miles. Don’t get so upset. “

“ ‘M not upset. I haven’t been up to anything, so you can go now. “

“ What’s wrong with you? “

“ Nothing’s wrong. You show up at my house and then you keep on asking me stupid questions like I don’t have anything else to do except talk to you. “, his eyes narrow. The once gold specks in the hazel colour are gone and replaced with anger. Your fist clenches, like he just punched you in the gut and you’re about to reel your own hand back and sock him with it.

“ What the hell is your problem? You barely even talk to me anymore and then when I try to be a good friend, you catch an attitude! “

“ I don’t have a problem! Estas Sordo? “ Miles moves his hand from the doorknob, reaching to grab your upper arm and push you back from the frame, not hard, but enough to get you to move out of his personal space. That you’ve hardly even invaded.

“ Go somewhere else. “, he spits.

“ Fine. “, your eyebrows are furrowed together. You’d been holding a sour expression for so long that your face was sore when you dropped it as soon as the door slammed in your face. Your feet automatically move to the exit of the building. A lump of guilt and anger welling up in your throat while you walk.

What the hell is his problem?

——

Miles swears he wants to choke you out. You’re so nosy. Can never mind your own business. He bounces his leg up and down, cracks his knuckles, drinks tons of water, tries to watch television, anything to get that conversation off his brain. So annoying. You should’ve never even come over. He wasn’t going tell you what was going on anyway, and you know that because you know him. Maybe you don’t know him, since anyone who knows him knows not to show up at his house uninvited.

Hard Headed. Cabeza Dura, whatever you want to be called. It doesn’t change the fact that you don’t listen, ever. It’s not like he ever told you not to come over, it was an unspoken rule!

I am avoiding you. Do not come over.

Easy as that.

You act like one dollar will turn into a million if you come over and act like the mediator between him and his thoughts.

But when he thinks about it, is it really as easy as that?

Of course, you’d come over.. but— not to argue with him. He didn’t want to argue with you, there was no point. He should’ve just said “ Okay. “ and left it at that. Maybe tell you the truth while he’s at it. The truth.

It’s Friday. The trip is next Sunday.

He hasn’t told you, he hasn’t told his mom, he hasn’t told Uncle Aaron and he certainly won’t be telling his school counsellor what the hell was going on in his very busy life. It’s eating him up on the inside. Tearing him apart and pulling out his hair. What will he do?

What would you do?

Tell the truth.

Shut up.

He has to tell his mom. Mama first, then everything else. She’s the only parent he has left. That makes his heart ache thinking about it. He should get over it, nothing is going to change the fact that he’s gone.

Why is every thought he’s ever had coming to the front of his mind right now when he’s about to tell his mom the craziest information? That he’s going on a trip 2244 Miles away from Brooklyn to Vegas of all places?

Right.

His fingers are shaking, he’s going to drop his phone or something. Just get it over with.

He messes up the passcode two times before getting it right, and then he mistypes, “ Mama “ in on the contact list once before he gets his shit together.

Do it.

The call button is right there.

Just do it.

Shut up.

translations:

Cabeza Dura. — hard headed.

Estas Sordo? — You’re deaf?

[nuooage]

[glidingsilvery]

69th San Sebastian Film Festival 2021

(📷 Jorge Fuembana,Gari Garaialde)

[elmaxlys]

The Line™: Analysis

The Line™ is from :re 107, Donato talking to Urie as he's about to dismember Hige. It is as follow:

English (mangastream): "Taste how it feels. How I feel. How cruel it is. Cruel to be one of those who can only but watch over others."

Italian (J-pop): "Proverai quello che ho provato io. È dura assistere senza poter fare nulla." (You will feel what I (emphasis) felt. It's hard to spectate without being able to do anything.)

French (Glénat): Tu vas sentir ce que j'ai éprouvé. C'est si cruel d'être un simple spectateur. (You will feel what I endured. It is so cruel to be a mere spectator.)

As I do not know Japanese, this will not be an analysis about the accuracy of these translations but rather of the stylistic choices and the different messages they convey despite being translations of the same line.

Disclaimer, I first experienced this chapter through Mangastream's translation.

Second disclaimer, I am still learning Italian.

Let's see together why:

One of the strengths of the Mangastream translation of that line is the repetitions: "Taste how it feels. How I feel. How cruel it is. Cruel to be one of those who can only but watch over others." That makes the pronoun change only even more glaringly obvious and I love it. We go from general to personal to general again and it can be seen in the words used I LOVE IT. It's all woven together.

The use of imperative instead of the 2nd person indicative like in French and Italian makes the power Donato has over him in that moment so much stronger. Sure, the Italian uses the future, which can have an imperative value - but the correct mode slaps you right in the face with it. It's brutal, like Donato is being. The future, here, softens the blow. And the French? Near future with "aller". In terms of imperative, I want to say it's a slight step above the future simple, but more than that, near future with "aller" in the 2nd person sounds like a threat.

Why my beef with it, then, you might wonder. Well it sounds (as in the actual spoken sounds) weak and soft. "tu va sentir ce que j'ai éprouvé." Too much softness in there, you can't feel the threat. At most, you can feel a hissing sound and get reminded of a snake -> sly -> the devil etc but, mostly, it sounds weak to me. Compare with the English "Taste how it feels. How I feel." Donato is spitting these words, they're whistling between his teeth. He's angry.

And the "it"? Neutral pronoun. Abstraction. It's a general feeling that comes with the situation Donato is describing. Anyone can feel it. But then we redirect it! Straight at Donato. It becomes personal. We readers were not yet aware of Donato's grudge toward Mikito. But we know it's personal from that line only. And it's in present tense!! In French and Italian, it's a past, finished, tense (which also disconnects from the earlier use of future in that sentence, which can be interpreted several ways). But in English he still feels that way. Why? Because at the time this scene takes place, Koutarou is still out of his reach.

About the disconnection between the future and past tenses in French, here are my thoughts:

if I'm generous, it shows the distance Donato puts between himself and Urie. Donato is so much older, he has lived so many more things, has felt things Urie can't even begin to imagine.

what actually comes to mind when I read the sentence: the distance feels physical. It has no bearings. Donato has felt that before. Big deal. And now Urie will feel these. Wow. Nothing is anchored in the present so why is it relevant.

Another thing with the French is how it changes the verb. In English, we keep "feel"; in Italian, we keep "provare". In French, we go from "sentir" (feel) to "éprouver" (suffer, endure). This breaks what I said about the threat. Not only does "sentir" feel extremely soft, it is also extremely underwhelming, especially when put next to motherfucking "éprouver". With éprouver you can feel the pain, the weight. It's a miserable verb. And on top of that, with the "pr" it sounds wayyy more harsh than sentir. So with all we've said, here's how I'd rephrase the French:

Tu vas éprouver ce que moi j'ai éprouvé. (you will endure what I (emphasis) have endured)

"But Max, you kept the opposition future/past you complained about!" Nicely caught! See, with the repetition of the same verb but mostly with the emphasis on "I" ("moi"), it redirects the feels onto Donato's. And it instantly becomes a big deal. There's no distance anymore. Donato is involved. We breach straight into my generous analysis, only thanks to that "moi". Languages, amirite?

And you know one thing? That French sentence I just wrote is the direct translation of the Italian line. So while I think the Italian line isn't as strong as the English one for stylistic reasons that were my first point, I think it's still way more solid than the French.

Now let's delve into that second panel, shall we?

As a reminder:

EN: How cruel it is. Cruel to be one of those who can only but watch over others.

FR: C'est si cruel d'être un simple spectateur.

IT: È dura assistere senza poter fare nulla.

First thing we notice is English made two sentences. The repetition is, again, a strength. Second thing we notice, the English is twice as long. What's up with that. (spoiler: writing skills)

Now I want to bring to your attention the verbs used to describe the powerlessness. In English, "watch"; in Italian, "assistere" (spectate, witness, so really just watch); in French, "être" (be). I am assuming you all know what dynamic and stative verbs are so with that out of the way, you'll notice that the French is, out of the three, the only one to use a stative verb. This reinforces the powerlessness. It is not an action that is being done, it's a state of being that is being imposed on him.

What about the adjectives? In English, we have the intensive "how" on top of the repetition of the adjective "cruel". In French, we have the intensive "si" to insist on "cruel", again. In Italian, we have no intensive and we have an adjective that means "difficult" instead of the "cruel" we can find in both French and English. To what effect? In the English, this act of watching comes off as crueler and more painful than what Donato is about to do to Higemaru. In French, it's way less intense but we still understand the affect tying Donato to what he's saying. In Italian, however, it's a mere formality. It's a game, almost, and Donato has no involvement, no tie, which is sad because he had established one in his previous line, albeit briefly, through "io".

And now the rest:

In Italian, it's about the impossibility of action. It's about the immobility. This is interesting because the previous panels, when Donato describes what he's about to do, the Italian translation puts a lot of emphasis on this immobility "senza muovere né braccia né gambe" (without moving either arms or legs). For Italian Donato, what was the worst part of Cochlea was being confined and having had his freedom taken away.

In French, I like it a lot because it contradicts directly what Roma says later: "Je préfère rester dans le public, à huer, comme une simple spectatrice qui détruit les acteurs quand le numéro est nul." (I prefer to stay in the audience, booing, like a mere spectator who destroys the actors when their act sucks.) Here, Donato uses the same words Roma will later use in 135: "simple spectateur" (it's in feminine form for Roma, of course, but you get it). While Donato resents the cruelty of it all, the inaction of it, Roma basks in it. But Roma also acts on it, she's not a powerless spectator, despite her words. No, she's a spectator who destroys. It's that opposition between "simple" and "détruire" that defines Roma: even outside, she still plays a role - and she doesn't like it when she does have to act. Donato, on the other hand, through this sentence, comes off as the very opposite. Staying outside, alone in this experience, is painful. Here, it joins Uta's words in ch116. In French, "J'aimerais être plus impliqué. La solitude me pèse. Toi aussi, n'est-ce pas ?" (I'd like to be involved more. Loneliness weighs on me. On you as well, isn't it?) which Donato refutes immediately, like the liar he is. I would have liked more emphasis on the cruelty because as it stands, this line is pretty good in its implications but it's not perfect in terms of weight.

Now onto the English. "one of those who can only but watch over others". "one of those" humbles him but also implies he's not alone in this situation. Is he referring to other Cochlea prisoners? Is he referring to God or a divine plane? Honestly, I lean toward the second one. Why? Because of "watch over". For a second as I planned this whole analysis I became worried that it didn't mean what I thought it did, as one does. So I went to look in online dictionaries and I turned to Oxford and Cambridge dictionaries, and the former gave me this definition: "to exercise protecting care over; to keep in constant view in order to preserve from harm or error." while Cambridge gave me "to protect someone and make certain that they are safe" and I don't know for you guys but it sounds more like something divine than something Cochlea prisoners would do. On top of that, but maybe this is reaching too far, is the literal meaning of "over" when Cochlea is underground. And a final word on my favorite part of that sentence "only but". Even in French I have a weak spot for the restrictive negation, as it so elegant, but "only but" sounds so pretty, this is the shittiest argument in this whole thing and I had to end with this but Oxford dictionary lists it as poetic so I stand my ground.

Thank you for reading until here, don't hesitate to tell me what you think - and if you're Italian to correct me on anything I might have gotten wrong 🥰🥰

[bonny-kookoo]

Hi, if you're okay with it I'd like to request Jungkook somehow finding out about the part he played in the pudding incident (maybe overhearing them talking about it again or her mentioning it to Yoongis hybrid so she's more careful around him)...so he can finally punch him 🙃 sorry, but I just think he needs to get set straight to realize he can't keep doing stuff like that and just get away with it.

I really enjoy your writing btw, thank you for sharing your works!<3

The tension is high in the apartment, Jungkook breathing heavily as he's held back by Yoongi, who's clearly struggling to keep the youngest of the group in his hold. While yes, Jungkook is and will stay the maknae, he's grown up at this point, physically superior to a lot of the members at this point- Yoongi included. He's already landed a hit on his bandleader's face; its clear that the only reason he doesn't continue being you and Yoongi's hybrid a little further away, hugging each other for comfort at the sight of everyone being so on edge.

"I deserve that." Namjon nods, holding his jaw. He's lucky his bandmate couldn't really land a full on hit on his face, as Yoongi had been quick enough to react in time.

"Of course you fucking do!" Jungkook yells out. "You almost killed her! And as for his-" Jungkook looks at Yoongi next to him before his heated gaze returns to his leader. "-You almost got her taken by authorities! What if she had run on the streets, got hit by a car, huh?! Would that have made you happy?!" He barks.

"Absolutely not. I.. didn't know she'd react like that." Namjoon offers defeatedly. "The same with yours. I wasn't.. aware that there was such a high amount in there, if I did I wouldn't have done it." He tries to explain himself, looking over at the two hybrids a little further away. "I'm sorry. I hope you know that." He offers.

"You don't even have the right to look at her-" Jungkook starts again, but Yoongi chimes in now.

"Alright, let's calm down here." He says calmly. "What I'm failing to understand here, is just why?" Yoongi wonders, looking at his bandleader, who turns to the side again, watching both hybrids become more calm now. "You're not a bad person, Namjoon. Why do this then?" He asks, letting go of Jungkook now so he can go and comfort his own hybrid.

"In this industry.. it's best if you, you know, surround yourself with people who won't be taken away from you. Who won't leave you, you know." He simply explains, as both hybrids slowly begin to explore his home after he nods in approval once they look at him as if to ask. "It'll just.. I just wanted you to realize that you're playing with fire. Like water in your hands- it will drip out between your fingers at some point, no matter how hard you try." He says, walking to sit down on his couch.

It doesn't take long for both Idols to follow him, their hybrids close behind, sitting close to them. Everyone doesn't understand, still. It feels like there's more to it than the bandleader lets on. It's only when Yoongi's hybrid finds a worn-down tiger plushy on the edge of the couch, that Yoongi seems to understand-

simply from the hurt that flashes in his friend's eyes as he gently takes it away from her, to place it somewhere out of reach for both hybrids.

"You've had one yourself." Yoongi says, and Namjoon sighs. "What happened?"

"Management happened." His leader defeatedly explains. "I trusted them like.. Jungkook did. Told them about her. Explained how I'm taking care of her, how I'm planning to solve issues like tours, and so on." He shrugs. "But back then, they weren't so lenient. It backfired, simple as that." He says.

"Backfired how?" Jungkook asks now, realizing why his friend might've been so hostile especially towards him. He's got something he never had been granted- the freedom to bring his partner to work with him, to have them protected just as well as they are themselves.

"Told me they'd help with the tour stuff. That she'd be given into a carecenter for the duration, and the company would cover the costs even." He recalls the events. "It sounded great. Not perfect, obviously- but it was a solution I could work with. So I explained to her the night before we had to leave for tour, that she'd stay at the center just for a few weeks until the tour would be over."

"But they never gave her back." Yoongi finishes, and Namjoon nods, clenching his jaw.

"I came back home, and she wasn't there. I talked to management about when I'd be able to pick her up- and they just told me 'never.', that she's staying there, forever." He explains further, both hybrids clearly distressed at the story he's telling. "And when I tried myself to get her back somehow, I couldn't find her. Nothing. Not under her name, nor her ID. She's gone, because I trusted management to handle it." He says. "I don't want you to go through that. I don't.. I wanted to protect you. All of you." He says, now looking at the hybrids as well.

"You could've simply talked to us." Jungkook mumbles, pulling his hybrid onto his lap. "We could've just spoken about this like now."

"Would you have believed me?" Namjoon questions. "You would've simply thought 'oh, that will never happen to me!', and then move on." He chuckles dryly, Yoongi sighing.

"Oh man, this is one big mess." He shakes his head. "Now what do we do?" He asks, and Jungkook puts out his hand.

"I accept your apology." He offers, and Namjoon nods, shaking his friend's hand. "It's.. not okay, but I can understand it, in a way." He says.

"Same here, by the way." Yoongi nods.

"I'll try and help you protect them." Namjoon says, sternly so. "I don't want you to go through this, and I understood that I went at it from the wrong direction. I'm really sorry." He says, and everyone nods at that, Yoongis hybrid even doing so much as to reach out and hug him- Jungkook's soon to follow.

It does bring the bandleader to tears a little bit- but it also shows how truthful he meant his words.

And on the sidelines, both Jungkook and Yoongi already think of how to maybe help him.

[thegeminisage]

whoops, i almost forgot about the star trek update. tuesday we watched tng's "firstborn" and "bloodlines" and last night we watched ds9's "the wire" (honorific)

firstborn (tng):

i was actually bracing for this one to suck ass bc everyone says worf is a bad dad. and i dont think he is!!! like, it doesn't come as easily to him as it does to sisko, and he sometimes forgets to be gentle or kind with alexander because he's so laser focused on how things SHOULD be he forgets to the importance of taking others' feelings into account, but that's how he is ALL THE TIME with EVERYONE not just his kid. considering the circumstances i'd say he's doing well

before we get started, GREAT cameo from the duras sisters. i was initially really annoyed with their tit windows but im becoming rather fond

i really liked "the family protector guy "k'mter" at first because he said all the right things to alexander...like, it's scary not being able to defend yourself, etc. then he also was a dick to alexander and i was really exasperated...but then he IS alexander so that totally fixes it. he's angry with himself and conflicted and just wants a HUG FROM HIS DAD and that FIXED it!!! like when he said "nobody will look at you and see a human you are alone on this ship" initially it felt like racism but it being like, not quite self-loathing but just bitter experience...that's actually so clever

this is the only episode where they brought up alexander's mom kind of hating ""klingon stuff"" and how that could possibly have negatively impacted him and it only got two lines of dialogue but still. i think it's really damning that she hated her own heritage and also brought her kid up to hate it and now he's sort of out here...pretending to be human, almost, to the point where he doesn't want to participate in hsi own culture or even bond with his own father (a klingon). like it sucks so bad for him

i was afraid that the plot twist would be "k'mter talks alexander into wanting to be a warrior after all just when worf realizes he doesn't have to be" which would have been sad but a real "oh shit" of an ending. mixed feelings about them not doing that but i understand why they wanted to properly wrap things up for s7

i almost forgot but rare w for picard for bending the rules a little bit to give worf time to go to the klingon festival with his kid. credit where it is due

bloodlines (tng):

i have never been so BITTERLY DISAPPOINTED.......................

they gave. picard. an affair baby.

THEY GAVE HIM AN AFFAIR BABY!

what have i been saying since farpoint! he has an affair baby! AND THEY GAVE HIM ONE

AND THEN TOOK IT AWAY

what was the POINT OF THE EPISODE

if that's not his fucking affair child

pussy ass little FUCKS couldnt commit to changes...

i can't even remember what else happened in this episode i was so disappointed about this plot twist

oh yeah actually i do remember picard made a bald joke which i THINK was the only time he's done that in seven seasons? i think the only time ANYONE'S done it? please correct me if i am wrong but i was so shocked it got a big laugh out of me. also a rare w for picard. if he made bald jokes more often i'd hate him less maybe

oh yeah i'm coming back to add this later but it was really hilarious that picard was so torn up over his not-son being a little criminal. his horrific unforgivable spelunking crimes. so true.

the wire (ds9)

ooohhhhhhhhhhhh my god. oh my GOD. let's fucking...get into it

i rly thot garak was just a guy but not only is he a former assassin he's a current junkie. A JUNKIE! he's just like me fr

also, he can act? like that scene where he was withdrawing and saying horrible shit to julian......i was on the edge of my seat.

i love that he gave us 3 different stories about how he got kicked out. i'm gonna be honest, i looked it up, and apparently we never find out the truth? that is a bold fucking move. a daring choice. we, like julian, will never have any certainty. like, sure, i WANT to believe he released some kids from being tortured, but it's also equally as likely that he killed civilians or did a number of other horrible things

like, the fact that he can lie about it even while under significant distress.........king. like you could say oh that's the true one because that's the one where he was physically unwell but he also referred to "elim" in that one which gives it the ring of a potential falsehood

julian forgiving him anyway, even after all the horrible stuff he said, even after being physically ATTACKED (WHICH WAS SCARY!!! i was scared of him!!!!!) for "whatever he did," just because garak said "i need to know someone forgives me"..........AUGHGHGH JESUS CHRIST

THE FACT THAT HE WON'T TALK ABOUT IT. he won't tell even US what he did. eliot spencer core actually. i am beside myself about it all

maybe he's right and it is all true. maybe he destroyed a ship and framed a friend AND let some kids go. it's literally none of business though like he's not gonna tell us

anyway, i heard the term "brain implant" and nearly died on the spot, so 10/10 episode

honestly, they should have just upgraded this guy to a regular. he is so good

NEXT TIME: tng's "emergence" and ds9's "crossover" AND YES I KNOW THAT'S MIRRORVERSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!