#i want them to be friends soooo bad. I’m delusional about it. sorry. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dadsbongos · 4 years ago

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Alright, so, I'm well aware that the antag series revolves around her and Hajime, but I kinda wanna know more about her relationship with Nagito, Mikan, and Kazuichi during the tragedy and after the neo world program

I'm really hooked to this series, but can you blame me lmao-

i can’t blame you nonny, antag reader series is literally all i think about anymore, literal brain rot. this is basically just like?? a character analysis essay type thing? i’m so sorry it’s so long, i just got soooo into it

Request for: antag reader (Mikan Tsumiki, Kazuichi Souda, Nagito Komaeda) Warnings: despair things, face swap mention, spoilers, manipulation and bad friending :( ~~~

Mikan Tsumiki (and like a pinch of Junko Enoshima):

The Tragedy: So basically the whole thing with (Y/n) is that her parents were just so overcritical to the point where it rooted her complex and felt like they never loved her, right? So basically, Junko was able to attack that by showing her the bare minimum affection and introducing Mikan into the mix, who was in a similar boat with being unloved. Junko made them both feel as though she was the best love they could ever have and then made them compete for it at any opportunity she could.

Mikan always loved Junko but she doesn’t love (Y/n) the same way and vice versa, despite that, they do both care for each other very deeply. They desire no relationship in each other and even view each other as rivals who happen to find somewhat of a friendship together. Mikan thinks, and always has, that (Y/n) is much more talented and worthy of Junko than she is. However, (Y/n), being deeply insecure far below the surface - never stopped thinking that Mikan was more beautiful and worthy of Junko than she was.

They find both comfort and hatred in each other due to Junko making them act as competition. They both know the pain of Junko’s rejection but they also both know that if the other was out of the way, they could have Junko all to themselves.

When (Y/n) found out Mikan took Junko’s womb, it was a betrayal due to the fact that she didn’t know beforehand, Mikan had never said anything about taking Junko’s uterus. And on top of that, she found out that Mikan had tried conceiving a despair child during their separation. Even though neither of them loves each other, they know their relationship can be viewed as lovers - they often view it as such themselves - and so, (Y/n) felt as though Mikan had cheated on her. She basically had. Even so, she still knows that nothing could make her hate Mikan, she doesn’t love her as she did Junko, but she loves her more than any other woman she’d ever known. Mikan is the only grounding she’s ever known and the only person to ever relate to her on such an intimate level.

Going back to the feeling of Mikan being prettier than her, (Y/n) stole Junko’s face entirely because of that feeling of inferiority. She never told Mikan because she was ashamed to admit that she was insecure, it would make her imperfect to be insecure.

Overall, she’s never loved Mikan as a girlfriend but they’ve always been all the other had during The Tragedy despite their ‘rivalry’ and insecurities surrounding the other.

After Neoworld: (Y/n) is definitely nervous to be around Mikan because of their history with each other and Junko. Before Mikan wakes up from the program she’s constantly worried about if the nurse will hate her or be disgusted by her. The way Mikan had treated her right before her execution hinted at some tenderness buried beneath discontent, but that could always change. When Mikan wakes up she immediately looks for (Y/n) on pure instinct.

They definitely try to help each other heal and cope with Junko’s manipulation and lies. They both have come to realize that Junko never loved either of them and they didn’t love each other - any of the comforts they had gathered in The Tragedy was a lie and they help each other through that realization.

“You’re more than what she made you.” is a common phrase between them because they know she only made them compete for her own entertainment and their despair.

It was cruel and they have to live with every emotional and physical scar from that time. But they still have each other.

Any sense of rivalry has dripped away from their bond and is now wholly intertwined by genuine friendship and connection. By their experiences and how they’re growing away from Junko and into themselves. Eventually, all their conversations stop being about Junko and healing and start being about a pretty shell Mikan found on the beach. Or how the water looks so inviting, they should go for a swim.

Or how the chairs need repainting.

Or how some flowers outside the front door would be lovely.

Or how good breakfast was this morning.

Kazuichi Souda:

The Tragedy: Kazuichi wasn’t as “enamored” with (Y/n) as he was Sonia, but he respected her Ultimate and higher intelligence enough to also refer to her as ‘miss’ when they went to school. Though he largely stopped calling her ‘Miss (Y/n)’ during The Tragedy he still respects her a lot and is even a little scared of her sometimes. Again, she’s way smarter than he is - she’s not a super genius like Izuru but she’s a smart cookie and he’s not so delusional to think he’s near her in intellect. So the fact she can copy his Ultimate status and be smarter than most people in their class is quite intimidating for him at times.

Because of the confidence she projects and her charisma and, again, higher intelligence than his, he often follows her word and example without much thought. Like if he saw her jump off a cliff, he would probably go along with it because he knows she probably has some plan to get out of the situation safely.

(Y/n) views Kazuichi sort of as a little brother - but one that follows you around like a puppy and always bugs you. She doesn’t expect much other than blind support from him and kind of accepts that he’s her “sidekick” so to speak. They didn’t view each other as equals or even true comrades - (Y/n) was always just better and that went unquestioned. She definitely used him to gain without putting much thought into the long-term of their relationship.

After Neoworld: Kazuichi had regained his memories in chunks as they left the program and at least could recall being so-called friends with (Y/n). When they awoke, they didn’t talk to each other that often since Kazuichi was extremely bitter about how she’d treated them all in the program (and him as a Remnant) and so she was left alone with Hajime.

It’s only as she actually begins healing and expressing more humane traits that he starts talking to her again. Neither apologizes for anything specific, they just aren’t those kinds of people and both parties can let it go easy enough - they’d both done horrific things and they know that. He invites her into his warehouse to take apart the Monokumas, he offers to go on walks along the beach with her - he finds it nice to be in her presence again.

Because even after what they’d been through, I feel like he does still deeply respect her due to her talent. He just also has gained more confidence in himself while in the program and therefore has more sense to not let her control his actions. Which, he finds that she hasn’t tried doing and that always encourages him to keep coming back.

Kazuichi thrives on positive feedback and (Y/n) knows this, so every time she can she’s expressing how much he means to her as a dear companion - both of them being hesitant to actually label themselves friends. Especially Kazuichi, who had already been hit by poor friendship and trust issues, remembering that (Y/n) used him during The Tragedy makes his brain go fuzzy on how he feels about her. Sometimes he’s angry and other times he forgives her wholeheartedly because he knows she’s sick and he wants her to be able to maintain the friendships that he’s able to.

I think it’s after she apologizes to everyone, pre-Nagito waking up but post Gundham and Nekomaru, that he really just lets go of everything.

It’s not easy to forget that he was just her tool but he knows that she’s better now and they start hanging out more often, by themselves, having a good ol’ time talking about absolute nonsense.

Respect turns into admiration.

Nagito Komaeda:

The Tragedy: So I’d already mentioned that (Y/n) influenced him into becoming Servant, but I wanna expand on that before digging into anything else. At heart, Nagito is a people pleaser to the Ultimates, and none more than the copycat who can master pretty much anything she wants. During their school years, she didn’t see anyone as her equal and that resonated with Nagito’s inferiority complex and while she hates people who have no confidence, she would hate to be like everyone else more. So she kinda just accepted the servitude that came with befriending Nagito on the first day of school up until The Tragedy where he practically begged her to take him with her wherever she went.

She was the first one to really hold onto his chain, both literally and metaphorically. He joined the Ultimate Despair with Junko to create a despair to overcome, but only (Y/n) was allowed to actually touch him - or else he started throwing a huge fit.

In order to spread despair and crush Nagito’s everlasting obsession with hope, she probably intentionally ignores and neglects him when he needs her.

This largely means when he’s mourning/remembering his parents and dog or his illnesses or when he’s falling into despair and needs her to pull him out, she’s just watching and doing nothing.

In fact, when Nagito had brought up his plans to join the Warriors of Hope he was really hoping she’d speak against it, and she didn’t. She actually encouraged it. Pushing him to leave her alone and join the WOH. It hurt, of course, it would, but he left all the same and they hadn’t spoken since despite their ‘friendship’. (Y/n) never bothered going after him, again to crush his love of hope.

She left him unhinged, alone, sick to fend for himself until he found the WOH, and even when he found them - she didn’t seem to care whether they let him live or killed him.

After Neoworld: Honestly? To say that she mourns Nagito, and her entire relationship with Nagito, is a huge fucking understatement. Especially as the others begin waking up and Hajime helps her grow, she just gets more and more depressed over her situation with Nagito. And as he takes longer and longer to wake up, she begins to accept that she was horrible to him and doesn’t deserve his forgiveness.

Before The Tragedy even, since they’d met. She always treated him with as little human respect as she could - she did it with everyone but especially him. He was basically just a little errand boy she liked to talk to and she didn’t treat him as more. During their time in despair, she was barely around for him, only holding him together when the others pushed her to do it because he was being annoying. She was so awful to the man she always claimed was her closest friend. And she wants him to hate her for it so bad.

Then he wakes up and he sees her and he smiles. He could never hate her and it only makes her feel worse.

Nagito sees how much she’s changed and he begins changing too, she tells him about how Hajime has helped her so much and he begins to follow her around with Hajime. She’s worried he’ll consider himself her lapdog again but it’s cleared up when he doesn’t run to her side one morning out of the few left before they leave.

In fact, it’s when he doesn’t speak to her for hours on end she realizes that every interaction they had was under his free will and choice.

He doesn’t do her chores for her. She doesn’t watch him fall apart silently. They talk like friends do. Not about how talentless people are worthless or how hope is all that matters but about how they can’t wait to rebuild their favorite hangout spots and make better memories there together.

They sort of have an unannounced “restart” where they just wipe the slate clean, mostly on (Y/n)’s part so she can treat Nagito how he deserves. As a true friend rather than a pawn.

#sdr2 x reader #nagito komaeda x reader #mikan tsumiki x reader #kazuichi souda x reader #anon chatter :)#antag reader

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whumpmatsus · 3 years ago

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Atsushi x Todo. Maybe Todomatsu has a ankle dislocation after a bike crash and Atsushi being the supportive boyfriend brings him to the Hospital and stays overnight?

aah, I don't really ship them?? I mean, I like them as friends, but for some reason I don't ship any of the canon characters together/like any of the canon ships and I like to focus on reader inserts and family fics with the brothers XD

but I'm fine to write these two in a shippy thing though, interesting dynamic to explore, and I headcanon Totty as pansexual, so, no problems writing it occasionally!

I hope it's okay haha, I've never written Atsushi before and he's not my usual 'type' so it might not be that great, hopefully still enjoyable tho <3

“Totty…”

“Yeah?”

“Are you sure you should be taking pictures of it? … And posting them??”

Totty snaps one more photo of his injured foot, giving a small cringe as he looks at the screen to put a filter on it. “Well, yeah… how else are people gonna know that I’m in pain and need attention?”

Atsushi rolls his eyes and pulls out his own cellphone. Far be it from him to tell his boyfriend what to do online, but… “The drugs are probably kicking in. You’re delusional.”

“Noooo…” Totty frowns as he glances away from his phone to focus on his ankle for a minute. Although they did give him some painkillers, and it feels better than it did when he first got here, it’s not great. This serves him right for thinking only shoulders could get dislocated, doesn’t it? “It still hurts. Look at it!”

“Yeah, I’m looking at it, babe.”

“Ooh, perv.” He wiggles his toes with a playful grin. “Is this what turns you on? Feet? And just when I thought I had all your kinks figured out. Hey, you can touch it, if you really want.”

Atsushi’s response is to, with the most deadpan look on his face, poke a single digit against Totty’s ankle. Not enough pressure that someone could accuse him of being cruel, though it might get the point across.

Predictably, the other man jumps about a mile. That simple touch sent an electric shock through his body, like someone had just rubbed salt in an open wound. “OW! Oh, my God, that hurt!!”

“Kind of my point.” To apologize, he reaches over to take Totty’s hand, rubbing the side gently with one thumb. “Do you really need to be giving your almost-broken-ankle a photo shoot and scumming for sympathy online? I’m right here to give you some, and you’ve also, you know… got five brothers who are gonna swarm all over you when I take you home.”

Totty huffs and brings Atsushi’s hand up to press against his cheek. He’s partially right, anyway. “Yeah, okay. Karamatsu’s gonna write an entire Greek tragedy about my suffering, Ichimatsu’s gonna withhold an ice pack till I’ve sufficiently begged for it, Choromatsu’s gonna lecture me about wearing fucking ankle pads, Jyushimatsu will end up hitting it with his baseball bat, and Osomatsu will make me hobble to the fridge and get him a beer. They’re pricks.”

“Tch, they’re also your brothers. Don’t forget you’re a prick, too. You belong to them, so they won’t be that bad. They’ll circle around you chanting, ��One of us, one of us’ and shove aspirin down your throat.” Atsushi’s eyes drift back down to the injury, and he finds himself wincing.

Honestly, it looks like Totty’s ankle went a few rounds with a sledgehammer. It’s swollen all the way down to the base where his toes meet the rest, and mottled with purplish-blue bruises. Despite the fact that it looks a lot better than the bloody, twisted mess it was when he first got Totty to the hospital, it’s certainly not any less painful.

Seems like Totty is thinking the same thing, because his hand drifts down for his fingertips to brush against it. He jolts again, just like he did when his boyfriend touched it. A tiny whimper slips out and a shoulder catches his head when he leans over for a pity party. “Owwww… dammit. This sucks! How am I supposed to do anything like this? I’m gonna be useless for… how long did the doctor say? Six to eight weeks?”

“Yeah, well, everyone else is gonna have to pick up the slack. I’ll do what I can, you know? At least you don’t live on your own.” Atsushi circles an arm around Totty’s shoulders with a sigh. “And I’m sure your boss will give you a break since you’re, like… broken bone adjacent. It’s not like you’re gonna be sitting around in pain and unable to do anything. You’re so dramatic.”

Totty hums. “You wouldn’t have me any other way, though, right?”

“Yep.” Atsushi kisses his cheek, prompting Totty to melt into the embrace fully, complete with fake-flustered cooing noises. “If you really feel like you need to take pictures and beg people to feel sorry for you online, go ahead and do it. But just remember who’s feeling the most sorry for you, who’s here in real life, and who’s willing to kiss the pain away.”

“Awww… so poetic. Huh, maybe I can take some pictures later and show people how great you’re taking care of me! Right? That would be fun.” Totty grins and pulls his injured ankle a little closer, still pouting at it.

Atsushi snorts as he takes another look at the injury. “Damn. Guess that’s the last time you try to show off for the ladies at my office by showing them how environmentally conscious you are, riding a bike to visit me. Why are you even trying to impress other people, anyway? I’m, like… right here. Perfect hair and all, you know.”

“Wow, who’s being dramatic now?” Totty laughs. “I’m happy with you. Buuuut, if we impress girls, we get a chance at a threesome. Huh, gee, though… you’re right about how we try to do it. The bike thing is played out. Who am I trying to fool? I already go to the gym and walk most places, I don’t need to ride a bike.”

Geez. “Never a dull moment with you, Totty.” He leans over to shut his boyfriend up with another kiss, this time on the lips. “You’ll apparently have plenty of time to brainstorm strategies, lazing around with that hurt foot and all. Luckily, though, the only person who’ll be around to take advantage of your stupid puppy face is me.”

Totty raises an eyebrow and flutters his eyes to get another kiss, humming into the contact. “Oh, good. Because I was thinking, my brothers will probably fawn over me for the first day or so, I can milk it that long, I think, but… after that, they’ll get sick of me asking for stuff pretty quick.”

He hooks both arms around Atsushi’s neck. “Soooo, after those first few days… they’ll be pretty happy for me to go sleep over at your house so you can deal with me. Hell, I bet they’ll send you a fruit basket for putting up with my needy ass! Maybe after I’ve gotten a bunch of pity from them, I can crash at your place for a few days.”

“Hm.” Atsushi presses his forehead against Totty’s with a devious smirk that shows they’re definitely on the same wavelength. “Then after a few days with me… they’ll be missing you and wanting to fuss over you again. Rinse and repeat. You get literally all of the attention from everyone, your brothers treat me like a saint for dealing with you, and they’re all way too dumb to realize they’re being yo-yo’d into taking care of you and your ego.”

Totty squeals and snuggles close, being careful not to bump his foot when he moves. “Oh, my God. I knew there was a reason I loved you!”

“Besides my ass, you mean?”

“… Oh. Yeah. Besides that, uh-huh.”

#Osomatsu san #whump #Totsushi #Totty #Atsushi #dislocation #bruises #hospital stay #these two are awful they deserve each other XD #go on Totty.......... go home and get bounced between your brothers and your boyfriend fussing over you haha

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mikauzoran · 4 years ago

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Platonic Alyanette/Adrienette/Ladrien: Drunk Ladybug on My Balcony? Yeah. This is Fine.: Chapter Five

Read it on AO3: Drunk Ladybug on My Balcony? Yeah. This is Fine.: Chapter Five: Horrifying Realization

Marinette looked up from her sewing machine and noted that Alya was still glaring at a mostly blank page on her laptop screen, her cursor blinking tauntingly much where it had been fifteen minutes ago when Marinette had last checked on her brooding companion.

“Everything okay?” she tentatively called to her best friend. “You don’t look like you’re making much progress on that article.”

Alya growled softly, sinking back into the cushion of Marinette’s chaise longue and gripping her hair with both hands at the roots. “Ugh. I just can’t focus right now.”

Marinette spun around in her chair to face Alya and give her her undivided attention. She arched an eyebrow concernedly as she inquired, “Anything in particular on your mind? You seem kind of irritated. If you need to vent, I’m all ears.”

Alya blew out a sigh and sat back up, gently closing her laptop and setting it aside. “I’m just…baffled, and, you know me, I can’t stand a mystery that resists solving.”

Marinette cocked her head to the side, intrigued. “What kind of mystery are you trying to crack?”

Alya bit her lip, hesitating, not wanting to tip her hand. She shook her head and waved dismissively in an attempt to minimize the significance of the problem to Marinette. “Oh, it’s just something I’m investigating. It’s driving me nuts because…has Adrien made you watch Kurosawa’s Rashomon?”

Marinette pursed her lips and wrinkled her brow as she silently repeated the film’s title to herself, trying to summon up some recollection. “Maybe? Sorry. Which one is that again? He always refers to them by their original Japanese titles, so sometimes they kind of blur together in my head.”

Alya smiled affectionately, explaining, “It’s the one where the characters all give their accounts of the same events, but their stories are all different and contradict one another.”

Marinette’s eyes widened. “Oooooh. Yeah. Is that the one where the guy takes home the abandoned baby at the end?”

The smile melted off of Alya’s face, turning down into a frown. “That’s the part you remember?”

Marinette shrugged simply. “That’s the most important part of the film, isn’t it? After watching the ugly sides of humanity portrayed in the rest of the film, the guy taking the baby home is something that inspires hope for the future. I really liked that.”

“Huh,” Alya replied thoughtfully, seeing Marinette’s point. “I mean, yeah,” she chuckled. “I guess you’re right.”

Marinette nodded, a self-satisfied grin just peeking out of the side of her mouth. “Of course I’m right. Adrien really likes that part too.”

“Nino likes the cinematography,” Alya snickered. “After Adrien showed it to him, he went on and on and on about the camera angles for three solid weeks.”

“Typical Nino,” Marinette laughed fondly. “So…what does the movie have to do with your investigation?”

Alya sighed as the frustration came rushing back. “The people I’ve interviewed’s stories aren’t lining up. They can’t possibly both be telling the truth, and yet, I don’t think either of them is lying to me. At least, they don’t seem to think that they’re lying, so…I just don’t know what to think, Marinette, and it’s making me want to scream. I’m going to figure this out,” she asserted, fire behind the declaration. “I am fueled by sheer annoyance!”

Marinette nodded encouragingly. “You’ll get it eventually. I’ve never known anything to be able to stop you once you set your mind to something, so I’m not holding out hope that this mystery will stand a chance against you for long.”

“You better believe it,” Alya snorted and then took a deep, cleansing breath so that she could appear to switch topics. “…So…”

Marinette’s head tipped to the right. “…Soooo?”

“Bear with me,” Alya requested, “but I just had movie night with Adrien, and we were talking about some things.”

Marinette shifted uncomfortably, eyeing her friend warily. “What is it?”

“I was just wondering…have you interacted much with Adrien as Ladybug?” Alya put it out there and then held her breath, eager for the results that would crack her case wide open.

Marinette blinked in surprise and then seemed to consider, searching her memories.

Alya frowned slightly.

Adrien had said that he and Ladybug interacted regularly, that they often had conversations and hung out, that they were close. If that were true, it wouldn’t be taking Marinette this long to come up with an answer…unless she was hiding something from Alya. But why would she do that now that her identity as Ladybug was no longer a secret?

“No,” Marinette finally answered. “Not really. I mean, no more so than any other Parisian who gets caught up in the akuma attacks as much as he does.”

“So…you two haven’t, like, had any lifechanging heart-to-heart talks?” Alya verified.

Marinette gave her a strange look. “Nope. When I’m transformed, I have a job to do. We’ve made chitchat while I’ve carried him to safety from time to time, but I don’t recall anything revolutionary or earthshattering ever being discussed. I think I would know if I’d reached that kind of romantic checkpoint with my crush.”

“Well, you have as Marinette,” Alya reminded encouragingly.

Marinette deflated, head dropping to her chest as she moaned, “Yeah, after a year of acting like a complete idiot in front of him.”

Alya rolled her eyes. “He thinks you’re adorable.”

Marinette scoffed, just as Alya had anticipated she would, and looked up. “Why are you asking about Ladybug and Adrien, Alya?”

Alya shrugged, playing it off casually as she switched the cross of her legs. “So, you don’t ever use your superpowers to go visit civilians and befriend them?”

Marinette gaped at Alya as if she suspected that her friend might be going insane. “No? How irresponsible would that be? If Papillon ever found out that Ladybug visited civilians, he would target them. I would never take that risk,” she stressed.

Alya quirked an eyebrow. “And yet, didn’t you tell me the other day that Chat Noir has been coming to visit Marinette for years now?”

Marinette averted her eyes, a soft blush flooding her cheeks. “That’s different.”

“How so?” Alya chortled. “Because you like it when the guy you love comes to woo your civilian self?”

“Because he’s lonely,” Marinette answered defensively. “I can go out as Marinette pretty much whenever I want and interact with whomever I want, but it’s not like that for Chat Noir.”

Alya’s grin faltered. “It’s not?”

Marinette shook her head vehemently. “Don’t breathe a word of what I’m about to say to anyone, but he has a really restrictive homelife.”

Alya’s eyes widened in surprise, and she leaned forward. “He does?”

Marinette sighed ruefully, “His mother died a while ago, and his father has been a really controlling jerk since then. He reminds me of Adrien’s father, actually, so imagine Gabriel Agreste, but, like, three times worse.”

Alya winced in sympathy. She knew how bad Gabriel Agreste could be to Adrien. She didn’t want to imagine worse neglect and abuse than that.

“So you see why it’s a different matter entirely for Chat Noir to use his Miraculous to get out of the house and go interact with other humans,” Marinette summarized, with a decisive nod.

Alya’s lips rounded into a pensive “O” as she took stock of this information. “Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense…. So…Ladybug doesn’t have any civilian friends?”

Marinette pursed her lips. “Civilian acquaintances, yes. Chat Noir and I get ice cream sometimes with Monsieur Ramier after he gets akumatized, but I wouldn’t consider us ‘friends’. Just friendly acquaintances.”

Alya nodded, trying to assimilate the additional facts she had gained.

So far, Adrien’s story was falling through, but Alya couldn’t bring herself to throw doubt on him yet. He’d been far too adamant about being close to Ladybug, about it not being a celebrity crush because he’d been on the receiving end of that much of his life and knew how horrible it could be.

Alya couldn’t make herself believe that Adrien was just delusional. There had to be something there.

“So…keep humoring me, but has Adrien ever told you he loves you?” Alya moved on, digging deeper.

Marinette gave her a bland, unimpressed look. “You mean other than in my dreams? No, Alya. What the heck is up with all the bizarre questions?”

“The why isn’t important,” Alya insisted with authority. “Just roll with it. I’m coming up with new tactics to get you and Adrien together.”

Marinette’s eyebrows slowly came together into a “V” of confusion. “But I decided to give up on Adrien.”

“Yeah, but if you change your mind, I’ve got it covered,” Alya explained, not convincing Marinette. “So Adrien’s never confessed his love for you?”

Marinette gave a longsuffering sigh. “Only to tell me what a great friend I am and how much he treasures my friendship.”

“Be nice,” Alya chided. “Friendship is a heck of a big deal to him. All he had was Chloé for thirteen years.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Marinette grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. “It just stings to get passively rejected like that over and over.”

“I know, Girl,” Alya cooed sympathetically. “I’m sorry. I know it’s not what you want, but try to take solace in how important being his friend makes you to him.”

“I know.” Marinette clicked her tongue in frustration. “I’m just sick of trying to make the best of things and looking on the bright side and taking the high road.”

“I get it,” Alya assured, “but I think we can still get you where you want to be.”

Marinette gave her a skeptical look. “Oh, yeah? How…if we overlook for a minute that I’m giving up on Adrien?”

“Has anyone ever confessed their love for you as Ladybug?” Alya tried a different route, trying to root out the truth.

Marinette sank petulantly in her desk chair. “Yeah, like, everyone and their dog. Ladybug is pretty universally loved.”

“No, like, seriously,” Alya clarified. “For real. Not just some crazy fan. Is there someone who actually loves Ladybug?”

Marinette almost replied automatically but then paused and considered. “I mean…if you’re asking about a civilian who loves Ladybug, then, no…but…there’s Chat Noir. I know that’s probably not what you mean, but…”

The gears in Alya’s mind caught on a snag and abruptly stopped, unable to keep turning as she came to an alarming solution that she wished she could dismiss out of hand.

She gulped, took a deep breath, and carefully inquired, “In the beginning, did you think Chat Noir was just joking when he told you he loved you?”

Marinette groaned, hiding her face in her hands. “Yeees. I know I’m the worst, but he was so over-the-top that I couldn’t take him seriously. It wasn’t until Glaciator when Chat Noir showed up on my balcony feeling all heartbroken over Ladybug that I realized that he was actually for real, and I felt awful, Alya.”

“But then you two talked and got things straightened out,” Alya added breathlessly, in a state of shock as she recalled what Adrien had told her.

“Yeah,” Marinette sighed, dropping her hands to her lap. “I still felt really bad for not returning his feelings, though, but I explained about how my heart was with someone else because I was pursuing Adrien at that point, so…”

Suddenly, things made too much sense, and Alya wished that they would stop because the solution she’d come to was just too ridiculous.

If Ladybug had been turning down Chat Noir because Marinette was in love with Adrien who was in love with Ladybug who was Marinette who loved Adrien who was Chat Noir…Alya was going to scream and pull her hair out and eat Nino’s hat or something.

Marinette jumped as Alya let out an involuntary curse. “W-What? What happened? What’s wrong?”

Alya cursed again, louder and more indignantly.

“Alya, what?” Marinette demanded. “You’re freaking me out.”

“Give me a minute,” Alya groaned, picking up the pillow on Marinette’s chaise and pressing it to her face, yelling into it.

Marinette sat staring at her best friend, utterly perplexed and not a small bit concerned.

Alya lowered the pillow about half a minute later, took a deep breath, and explained, “My life is dumb. Everything is so stupid and dumb, and my life’s work has no meaning because secret identities are infuriating.”

Marinette blinked uncomprehendingly. “Alya…are you okay?”

“No,” Alya replied calmly. “But you know what?”

“What?” Marinette played along, hoping that things would start making sense soon.

“It’s going to be okay,” Alya assured, fueled by a new sense of determination. “I’m going to fix everything, and it’s going to be fine.”

“Oh. That’s good,” Marinette replied, not so sure.

“New plan,” Alya announced, clapping her hands as she got to her feet and went over to Marinette, gently pulling the other girl up to standing and placing her hands on a very confused Marinette’s shoulders. “Step one. We need to make things right between you and Chat Noir.”

Marinette’s brow scrunched up, eyes narrowing. “Between Marinette and Chat Noir or Ladybug and Chat Noir? Because everything’s fine between us, Alya. Our partnership is great. Our friendship is great. Everything’s great. No fixing necessary.”

“Wrong,” Alya countered, pinning Marinette to the spot with an intense gaze.

Marinette saw the drive in Alya’s eyes and knew better than to argue.

“Girl, I know you told Chat Noir that there was someone else and that nothing was going to happen between you two, but your words and your actions aren’t lining up.”

Marinette’s frown deepened, shifting from confusion to apprehension. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you’ve unintentionally been leading the poor boy on for years now,” Alya explained patiently yet decidedly. “You’re really bad at hiding your feelings, Marinette. The only reason Adrien doesn’t know is because his father kept him locked up the first thirteen years of his life, so he has zero understanding of social cues. You may have told Chat Noir that nothing was going to happen, but your actions have been hinting at the fact that you have feelings for him, so he’s been stuck in this loop of you telling him no with your words but then turning around and telling him maybe with your actions.”

Marinette’s face blanched in horror as she thought of her behavior around Chat Noir. Part of her wanted to tell Alya that she was off base, but a larger part knew that what Alya was saying rang true.

She had told Chat Noir in no uncertain terms that there was someone else and that they could only be partners and friends, but…there was the platonic flirting, just to start with. It had only been platonic for a short while. After Marinette had started to reciprocate Chat’s feelings, the flirting had ceased to be in jest. She hadn’t told Chat that she was serious, but…maybe there was a part of him that could tell.

And then there was the way she was so handsy with him. It was true that friends could be physically affectionate without there having to be romantic feelings, but…the hugs and the snuggling on rooftops and the casual touches…it had meant something to her, and she knew it had meant something to him. The only thing was that he hadn’t known what she was feeling, but…what if Alya was right and he had picked up on her romantic interest in him?

What if she’d unknowingly been giving him false hope all this time? It had never been her intention to lead him on. She wanted him to find someone to love him, find someone who made him happy. What if he’d pushed pause on all of that while waiting for her?

She felt sick, thinking that she’d been keeping him waiting, keeping him trapped because she knew he would wait forever for her if she gave him the slightest sliver of hope.

It was Marinette’s turn to curse loudly.

“Yeah,” Alya sighed in agreement.

“Alya, what do I do?!” Marinette demanded, gripping her friend by the arms, beginning to freak out.

“Deep breath,” Alya coached, inhaling and exhaling slowly so that Marinette could follow along.

They repeated the process several times until Marinette had markedly calmed down.

“Okay. Now what?” Marinette urged. “How do I fix this?”

“Call him,” Alya instructed. “Right now. Transform and call him and ask him to meet, and then come clean. Tell him what you told me the other day about how you love him, but it can’t happen because of your duty to Paris and the Guardian thing and the other guy you’re in love with and all that. Be honest with him and tell him you want him to give other people in his life a chance because you want him to be happy. Encourage him to move on. Give him the closure he needs, so he’ll know once and for all that nothing is happening between you two.”

Marinette blinked owlishly. “You want me to call him right now?”

Alya nodded. “Did I stutter? ‘Right now’ means right now, so hop to it. Put your spots on, call your cat-boy, and get this sorted out.”

“Like…right now?” Marinette gulped.

Alya stepped back, crossing her arms in disapproval as she gave Marinette a look that clearly begged the question, “Seriously?”

“I’m just…not prepared,” Marinette tried to finagle. “Usually, before I try to confess my feelings to Adrien, I come up with a plan and a script, so I’m prepared. Tikki and I practice roleplaying, and I memorize my lines, and—��

“—And that never works,” Alya cut in, not taking no for an answer.

Adrien had waited long enough. It was time Ladybug let him off the hook so that he could move on and be happy with Marinette.

Marinette’s shoulders rose up to meet her ears as she grumbled, “You never know. It might one of these days.”

“Tikki,” Alya called out for backup, “could you please tell her to get her butt in gear already? She’s stalling.”

“Tikki,” Marinette whined, “Alya’s being brutally honest, and I don’t like it.”

The kwami gave a soft, affectionate sigh as she flew down from her perch and nuzzled Marinette’s cheek. “I know you don’t think you’re ready, Marinette, but, if you wait until you do feel ready, you may never tell him how you feel at all. Maybe extemporaneous speaking would be good for you,” she encouraged, ever the optimist and cheerleader.

Marinette looked almost persuaded, but a hint of doubt remained, pinched between her eyebrows.

“After all,” Tikki continued, “do you really want to keep Chat Noir dangling in the dark for any longer than you already have? It has been six years since you realized you had feelings for him, Marinette. I think it would be best to tell him sooner rather than later.”

“Oh, all right,” Marinette sighed, sinking back down into her desk chair. “You two win. I’ll call him and figure out what to tell him on the fly. Tikki, transform me.”

#Alyanette #Platonic Alyanette #Adrinette #Adrienette #Ladrien #Love Square #Miraculous Ladybug #Miraculous Ladybug Fanfiction #Alya Césaire #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #Ladybug #Adrien Agreste #Chat Noir #Tikki #Friendship #Fluff #Mikau's Writings #Drunk Ladybug on My Balcony? Yeah. This is Fine.

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facepalming-since-chernobyl · 5 years ago

Text

Why SC shippers are still pieces of crap, episode 249276187329432

So, Jeremy and Chris joked about MonWinn being married and here we have vultures having no lives. Or having lives, but focused on shitting on others because, guess what, they can’t be happy without it.

Case, number 1

So what we have here? A bunch of homophobes? Last time I checked we KMs were all called like that, because we didn’t ship their precious crack ship, but here they have a problem with people shipping two guys.

oh sure, Kara doesn’t do anything else just stares at Lena’s boobs, especially when she is TRAPPED IN A KRYPTONITE CAGE AND TORTURED BY LENA. I guess they ignore the tiny, tiny, tinyyyyyyyyy argument why we don’t ship SC - because Lena is a fucking TOXIC PIECE OF CRAP AND NO ONE SANE would ship Kara with her. As for people who scream about toxic ships and why it’s so wrong about shipping karamel or guardiancorp it’s quite amazing how they ignore their OWN FUCKING STANDARDS since season 3. So, what double standards, sweethearts???

Case 2

Here we can only pray I’m afraid, because the amount of shit these two people have in their brains is quite amazing.

Calling Mon-El “ex-slave” owner while stanning Lena is the best joke in SG fandom, too bad Scs are too dumb to realize the irony (maybe in some years, Rao knows). Also, saying that someone is a rapist, with basically zero evidences is one of the most disgusting shit you can say, but well - SC shipper, what to expec? It’s like saying that Lena killed homeless people to get the hearts she experimented on in s4, the problem is she murdered Adam and then Lex, so you can start to wonder :)

Case 3

Yeah, and they gave Lena a villain story, including enslaving people and aliens, raping (oops!) their minds, murdering them with cold blood and torturing the main hero of the show. Irony, again, especially because Mon-El created Legion in Kara’s memory and put a COMET on the Legion rings. While Lena TORTURED Kara and wanted to made her a robot.

Case 4

The hypocrisy is that for YEARS now SCs have been moaning how disgusting we are for shipping Karamel, how we can’t do it, how much we can screw ourselves with our “ex-slave rapist white privileged fuck boy”, how Karamel is over party blah blah, while HATING ON ACTORS for basically breathing and sending them DEATH THREATS and other shit and they say we are mad because they ship Kara and Lena - look at my dead body rolling on the floor, crying from laughter. Woot, woot!

Case 5

Is Sc/Lena fandom going to call Melissa homophobe again? Call her a whore? Send her and Jeremy death threats? Try to make their career flop? Cancel almost whole SG cast for calling their ship FRIENDS like they are in the canon? Made fun of real life relationship? Because oh boy, do we really want to come back to sweet SDCC17 where SC fandom showed the most disgusting face of the fandom?

Case 6

Oh look, real representation fighters have spoken, because they know shit! Bow to the queens and kings, guys! And awwwww, they allowed us to ship mm ships! We are soooo fucking thankful! Like I don;t know, should we sent them baskets with fruits? Roses? Unicorns????

Once again, why we think SC is so toxic? Lena just tortured Kara with kryptonite, manipulated her for months, plotted revange, shot her with misseles, yelled at her, accused of doing shit, produced kryptonite, lied, manupualted blah, blah, I mean, relationship goals???

Case 6 continues

*Takes a deep breath*

*Laughs like a mad hyena*

*calms down*

*nope, laughs more*

Ok, so here we have the example of the hmmm, shippers who... ship two, white, so far straight, privileged, WHITE, hot, young, pretty woman, who so far are not representation, ignoring TWO canon lesbian couples (SS and AK) in favor of their delusional white bread? :)))) Also, friendly reminder that, both Alex love interests were POC characters - real representation. Plus, Lena’s two male LI were POC guys who were horribly hated by basically whole SC fandom, so what? Following this amazing logic of the idiots above, scs are racists?

And, no matter how many times I said I ship/like/support SS or AL I have heard it doesn’t matter, I’m still a homophobe, so you can’t win as long as you are not SC, huh?

But to sum up, let me say that fucking once.

SCS, do you know why we don’t ship Lena and Kara? Why a lot of us want to throw up every time we see Snowflake Luthor’s face on our screens? Why we don’t give a FLYING fuck about her privileged white ass? No, it’s not because we are homophobes - sorry to dissapoint you. You know why? It’s because of YOU :)

Yes, you and your constant fucking moaning about how Mon-El was a rapist, fuck boy, toxic piece of crap everywhere, under every SG official account and post, in our fucking tags, under ACTORS’ posts on twitter and instagram, while your fave piece of crap has done 100 times worse shit than he ever thought about doing.

You and your constant bitching about karamel being toxic and a bad example for little girls, while your fucking ship is made of a main hero of the show that you treat like a shit, becasue she “betrayed” (HA HA HA HA for repsecting the main character of the show) your precious murderous, toxic, slave owning, abusive idiot, who TORTURED, YES TORTURED Kara FOR KEEPING A SECRET.

You and your fucking “joking” about meltie, body shaming actors, shitting on every male character who is an obstacle for your shit, harassing cast, producers and writers to get your ship, bullying actors out of the show and CELEBRATING IT, bashing people, KIDS!, for liking something else than you. For doing and posting such disgusting shit that I can’t fucking believe someone with one decent cell in a body could have done that.

You know what you did? Every time I see someone with an avatar of Katie/Lena I immediatelly suspect this person is a piece of crap. Every time I see SC scene, gif or a post I’m disgusted. Not because it’s a ship made of two women, but because I associate that with a constanf fucking BULLYING and other disgusting shit I have been seeing for the past 3 years.

And you know why we ship MonWinn? Listen, because this is going to be a surprise of your lives- because we want our fave characters to be happy, you fucking morons. Got it? Or do I need to draw you a fucking comic book, because I suspect reading is too advanced for you all.

And now you can go fuck yourselves, because this and hating on others is the only thing that keep you alive. Without it you have no fucking idea what to do. What is absolutely HILARIOUS. And the fact you think we call you delusional, because of shipping SC. Nah, you are delusional because you think that after THREE FUCKING YEARS of you harassing and molesting whole SG crew and other fandoms, you are going to get your ship.

#antilena #gmo lena #my shit #gofuckyourselves2020 #na pohybel skurwysynom #veni vidi vici #anti sc fandom

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yaboylevi · 5 years ago

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What about this chapter did you not like? love your art btw ❤️

Thanks!

Sorry for the wait, I wanted to read the official chapter and wait for a bit to see if my feelings changed (spoiler: they didn't).

It would be way faster to list the few things I enjoyed but alas.

VERY negative opinions under the cut. Seriously, if you liked the chapter, don't read this, I don't want to spoil your fun or upset you. I didn't bother to write this in a respectful tone, it's not an analysis, it's just me venting. That being said, if you guys read this ignoring my warning and get upset, it'll be your fault and responsibility, yeah.

The Annie's father stuff was okay, though I hope it's gonna be explained why he was the only one in Liberio running against the flow of the screaming crowd.

Then we get Reiner being pathetic once again, I am so tired of this. What's his purpose in the story aside from killing people, being a nuisance and or dead weight to others and feeling sorry for himself? I would've appreciated if he had had some introspection on how his rushed plan was partially the cause for Porco's death and Falco's transformation (and all the other deaths bc Zeke would've never screamed in Shiganshina if Reiner hadn't pushed for another attack there). But anyway if he'd had introspection, it would've been about self-pity and NEVER growth because he seems unable to have that, so I would've disliked it anyway.

If I wasn't already rolling my eyes this hard at Reiner, then I would've started at Gabi. She's all over the place and I guess it's understandable since she is a kid and also deeply shocked and in pain. I understand it. But I don't like how Isayama made her go from despair, to murder instinct, to calm and collected in 2 pages. It's just ???? Then we have the Eren parallel and I groaned out loud. Whatever its meaning is. It's just forced.

One of the things I hated this chapter for and that I'm becoming so annoyed at in general lately, is that EVERYTHING parallels something that has already happened, and I don't understand if Isayama thinks he's being smart or if it has some deeper meaning like "oh see, history repeats itself!! wow!! a concept that is not being repeated ad nauseam in the series, not at all!! /s". I don't need it to be shoved into my face.

Idk. Also Reiner, of course, being safe in a house amongst titan territory...of...course...

Then the 104th scene. Ugh. Jean's delusion is so annoying. One moment he's rational, the other is like "muuuuu ereh is doing this for us!!! we couldn't do anything!!!", then he's rational again. Maybe if they had paid attention to Eren, and didn't only take into consideration stupid ideas that would've never worked for 4 years, maaaybe yeah, this wouldn't be happening. Who knows. I'm just tired of the 104th whining about their situation. I understand where they're coming from, their feelings, etc, I understand it's a crazy and emotional situation and all, but we already have SO MANY CHAPTERS about it, it's time to move on at least with the plot. It's just so pathetic and annoying. It makes me angry how he's basically trying to avoid responsibility or rationalize genocide like all the Eren goat stans in the fandom. I hate this mentality so much. "if they disappear, so will all the hatred! Do we really have to stop him?" JESUS CHRIST JEAN..............yikes

And then of course they (and Isayama) had to ruin chapter 108.

Then Jean also had the guts to say they should kill a kid so they can revive a commander, just bc he's too scared to take the reins of the situation. Again, I understand the struggle, it's the same as Hange afterall, it's just very, very ugly how he didn't even waver. Connie's been acting irrational, and he's been swept up by his anger for a while now, so I understand his development. Plus I find it more relatable to wanting to make a big sacrifice for someone you love, rather than someone you (think you) need. But Jean???? wtf. He doesn't even think back on the sin he was willing to commit, he isn't ashamed.

Armin as well doesn't even care that it's a kid they're talking about, he's only strategizing. And here's another annoying point: he's able to make these calculations now but when it comes to Eren his brain freezes and he becomes a delusional kid. Where were his brains when he had to think up of ways to negotiate with the world? Anyway, I get it, it's because Eren's his childhood friend and family. I am just so tired of seeing this again and again, and again. We've been stuck on this for over a year... Nothing has changed, they're just dejectedly going back and forth on their opinions and feelings. Really goes to show that Eren was the real heart of their group...

Connie flying away from the battlefield, effectively splitting again the povs we need to follow is...big yikes.

Parallel to Trost, parallel to Serumbowl. Yeah wow so interesting.

Nile dying so quick like that was also underwhelming. And it was unnecessarily cruel, imo, that as a titan he tried to kill children when as a person he was so sweet with kids (except with Eren, of course...).

The Gabi-Sasha parallel left me a bit confused. On the one hand, I don't like the killer being paralleled to the murdered. But on the other hand, I understand why that is [/inserts meta that i don't care about writing]. The Kaya-Gabi moments were also cute + Nicolo's little speech was nice, though a bit awkward, imo. I bitterly laughed at Gabi finally admitting that she mindlessly killed people just to be praised. At least she can better herself from now on! If only her cousin could take his self-pity and do something to change himself with it, but no, he just wants to change others or run away (and this is why i don't like reiner anymore).

Shadis saving these ungrateful kids was pretty cool.

I felt bad for Yelena, I want to see more of her (and maybe Mikasa+Louise), but instead, we have Jean vs Floch angst and I'm already sleeping, because I care so little about both of them.

Isayama painting Jean as a cool leader is just embarrassing when moments before he was pathetically whining and trying to kill a child (to which there was no setup, especially comparing it to the setup for Connie's plot thread. The last we saw of Jean with a kid was him wondering if he hesitated in killing the Cart because of Falco 15 chapters ago...and that was a compelling doubt but I guess he hadn't hesitated at the time, after all lol). The pages dedicated to the killing of the titans were boring, occupying space for nothing imo. Glossing over them would've sufficed, there could've just been the Pixis stuff, and it would've been fine. Which, btw, made me laugh a little in retrospect, because Armin is once again involved in the death of a Commander. Oh well.

I also didn't like that mini-flashback with Eren&Pixis. I guess Isayama wants to ruin every single nice moment Eren had with other people, because Eren is soooo so so bad now uwu, for no good reason, and it's only his fault right? people were nice to him and look at how he repaid them uwu. Big yikes for me.

I expected more from that Louise panel because it made me go [EYES EMOJI], but I guess I'll have to wait.

It's also unbelievable that NO ONE IN THE WHOLE STORY has thought of stopping Floch, when last time they arrested him, so technically why would they even leave him running around NOW? It's beyond me. Do they have a brain?

As for the basement conversation with Gabi, I hope that "I won't give up on Falco" panel + Armin looking at Gabi thoughtfully will start a "We can't give up on Eren" mindset for the 104th, but I doubt it's gonna be handled in a non-pathetic way, considering how's been done as of late.

Gabi screaming to talk to Eren was also very embarrassing from a reader pov (well, my pov). Because she was RIGHT THERE when EMA talked last time, and she should know that would most likely not work (I guess she's talking out of desperation but still...ppl be like "yeah!! they should talk to ErEn!1 why didn't they think of it!?!?!" and I mean it's probably gonna come down to that if the final audio is of any indication...I just find the presentation of this concept awkward and forced).

I really disliked most of Gabi's part, even though she's a character I have learned to enjoy. I guess what shined through in this chapter is exactly what I don't like about how Isayama uses Gabi's character: it seems like she's just there as a fast-paced mini representation of the story themes, so she's just an instrument to the story. Sometimes I feel like she's a real character, sometimes I feel she's just a tool for the story and the themes.

Armin's reaction to hearing about Annie is...I don't know. aruani has been one of my first ships and I used to be obsessed, but this is just awkward and forced, just like the previous aruani scene that made me angry at Armin. I don't even understand if Armin's shocked, scared or happy. All of these don't make sense to me, because I have no clue what he even expects from her.

Annie's release from the crystal happened in an unexpected way which i appreciated, though I would've liked it more if she had decided to get out on her own. But it depends on if she was stuck in there or if she was still willingly escaping from reality. If she was stuck, I will love this a lot more, because basically Eren set her free.

Also, Eren's radio podcast was longer I guess ("Eren said he would undo all the hardening"), and I wonder why we couldn't hear it all. Sigh.

In general, the "theme thread" of the chapter (adults & kids) felt really pushed in our face. I appreciate when things are a bit more subtle, this just came off as...boring, because every scene made me go "well, of fucking course this scene would end like this...". The only tense moment was the Connie part, let's be real.

And yeah, my perception may be also partially because I am so tired of no Eren pov and "eren is the evil, evil villain" rhetoric, so maybe I will appreciate this chapter more once we get his pov at the end of the story (bc i have no illusions left that this won't happen anytime before the finishing line). For now, I'm just frustrated because I didn't care about ANY of the things that went down in this chapter. Like, okay, let's move on, ffs.

Everything felt forced and contrived, like, Isayama must know that nobody cares about this stuff that much and everyone would prefer to see literally anything else amongst Eren, Historia, Levi&Hange, the Colossals. Hell, imagine if this chapter didn't have Annie at the end. That was the only thing that made this chapter barely worth the read for me. I hope the next one will at least follow Connie and Annie, if I can't get any of the other things that interest me.

#salt and character hate I'm so sorry hhhh #don't read if you get v upset @ ppl's opinions #and if you enjoyed the chapter #really #if you liked the chapter don't read this #if you read this and come cry in my ask box or replies I'll block you #if you read this and feel the need to rant on your blog (or your discord chat lol) about me you're just a loser bc I warned you #dl #shingeki asks #Anonymous

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blatherkatt · 6 years ago

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i just started reading your blumenthal kids reunionfic and i LOVE IT! Its so good and so full of potential and angst and I LOVE IT!!!💞💞💞 The way you write Eodwulf is soooo good hes such a mess and so gay help him. and Astrid Omg... I cant wait for more of her i checked out some of your posts on here and shes just great??? You've clearly put a lot of thought into them with the child designs and stuff, did you have any major inspo for the two of them like songs or other characters and stuff???

hey tumblr dont…delete part of my answer what the heck

anyway!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH,,, ed ( @tactfulgrimalkin ) is the one doing the actual writing but we plan everything together and i edit and do artwork so he deserves lots of love for the great writing…i dont remember what else i had here before tumblr deleted it so i hope thats the gist of it

eodwulf is a gay disaster of a bastard man and astrid is SO fun and im SO GLAD UR EXCITED TOO BECAUSE WE SURE ARE

anyway you just opened pandora’s box and i’m very sorry for the length of the rest of this answer but here we go prepare for some cursed content necessary to answer that question ( | ) w ( | ) it was a Wild Ride getting these two characters to where they are boy howdy

so the thing is in order to explain how we created these characters i actually have to get into the origins of the fic on the whole because the two are inextricably linked, and also, the origins of this fic are incredibly cursed and you can send all ur hatemail right here go on blast us we’re ready

but we were talking about caleb and how we’re both excited for whenever astrid and eodwulf turn up, and the thought came up for basically the rough skeleton of that scene in chapter 2:

“hey how messed up would it be if instead of them both hunting him down like we’re expecting…one of them comes in with a huge savior complex and sincerely thinks he’s delusional and should still be in the asylum, how MESSED UP would that be”

…and then shortly after that, this happened

thats the cursed part dont say i didnt warn u but listen you know we’re right

also that pic of caduceus didnt exist back then i went back and got this screenshot just to share the curse with you all

ANYWAY

in classic us format we got carried away and eodwulf got slotted into the role of that scene in chapter two and his character was largely developed around that scene, like, what kind of person would still be clinging to caleb after all this time to that degree to make that happen? and what was come up with was an extremely avoidant person clinging to a fantasy version of things wherein they don’t have to fight

(eodwulf was developed into a Person before astrid, i should note at this point, and ed did most of that developing; i took point on astrid later on)

but around this time i went “screw it im gonna do some concept art we’re both in too deep now” so here’s some of that for u guys

started with them all as teens and did a couple sketches as well as one of baby (well. teen. so baby) caleb/bren/we were calling him felix at the time as some of u probably already know

first draft had astrid with longer hair than eodwulf lmao check this out

flipped the hair length on those two which was for the best because at the time we were imagining eodwulf as a bit more mischevious which is another thing that got reversed over time now astrids the prankster and eodwulfs the overworked mom friend because bren takes astrid’s ideas and makes them SO MUCH WORSE but he still looks better with longer hair and then i played around w/ colors for a while and wound up w/ this

voila, the initial kid concepts, to which subtle yet vital changes were made after time. if any of you are curious about if im frustrated that that’s still the best i’ve ever drawn eodwulf’s nose the answer is yes. yes i am.

astrid’s hair is not messy enough, theres not enough freckles, and she does not look ready to fight the entire world for a dare. 0/10.

anyway then i did adult versions which look WAY OFF NOW LMAO

eodwulf with way too much beard, looking far too messy when he ought to look very clean so that he can hide how much of a disaster he actually is, and also a glimpse into the very boring Ice Queen/Heartless Bitch we vaguely had astrid as to start with. even more out of character tho is the earring, astrid as she is today would absolutely never tolerate an earring unless she absolutely had to, girl’s got sensory issues but she didn’t back then. ALSO STILL NOT ENOUGH FRECKLE

anyWHO a while after this it was decided that eodwulf has ADHD, something both the authors have a whole lot of lmao, and that was the point where ed REALLY took off and developing eodwulf went out of control and we both went Well I Guess We’re Gonna Have To Write This At Some Point Now

and with that happening is when developing astrid took more priority i think, because man, at that point in the game she came way too close to that really annoying trope that shows up in fanfic a lot wherein The Girl is A Bitch who is Getting In The Way Of ~*The Yaois*~ and thats like, thats bad. we knew from the outset we were absolutely not setting this up as a love triangle because we both hate those but even w/ her having no romantic relationship to either of the two, like…she was kind of just There and the one who was most loyal to trent (the only thing of her original characterization that really stuck, honestly) and sooo boring????

so like, and i say this honestly, i managed to COMPLETELY FORGET that “reverse sasuke” cursed comment from the beginning of all this and STILL go “well what if we made her more like caleb’s rival that’d be fun”

and that’s how astrid sorta wound up accidentally morphing into the Scrappy Underdog of this anime trio and calling her a naruto analogue is extremely cursed but also not inaccurate tbh

started out with the concept of her popping into bren’s window because she heard they were doing magic and wanted to learn it too and evolved from there; we decided that she was gonna be neurodivergent too but, hilariously, initially that she was “the best at pretending to be neurotypical” (WE COMPLETELY REVERSED THAT AND IT IS FOR THE BETTER. SHE’S SO MUCH MORE FUN NOW) and made her also autistic because it one meant she could be like SAME HAT at bren really hard which’d make her feel more like part of the group instead of just the odd one out, and two because it fits with the whole rivals thing

branching off of that we made her just. INCREDIBLY direct. like. astrid’s thought process is “how can i accomplish what i want accomplished with the smallest number of steps? what are the consequences of doing it this way? do i give a shit? no? im gonna do that.”

(which is why she climbed a tree to get into bren’s attic instead of using the door because that way she just completely skipped having to convince his mom to let her in)

i cant get into it much here because so many spoilers and we’re gonna explore it all, but like, astrid’s backstory turned into this exploration of the intersection of sexism and ableism especially as applied to a medieval-esque society in which the word “autism” doesn’t even EXIST and in which a convenient double standard exists Right There in the form of bren and like,, its gonna be good guys im excited for it

as far as characters tho she does also have just a touch of Vimes from discworld to her, albeit like, she’s lawful evil to his lawful good, but she’s got the same tendency to stick REALLY FIERCELY to the rules that she thinks are important, even when they inconvenience her, even if it’d be so much easier to bend them just this once

and for songs i cannot link like any astrid songs because they all might accidentally give away so much BUT I CAN LINK AN EODWULF SONG

youtube

this one was HUGE for him

uhhhh i think that’s everything i can think of that we can say right now unfortunately so i’ll end this with a comparison to the current teen designs we have now that are being used in the actual fic, even tho im not fond of how bren came out in this picture, but like, for the sake of comparison

lets see how far we’ve come

I N C R E A S E F R E C K L E

#longpost #SORRY TO PEOPLE ON MOBILE #zemnianghosts #i also got a lot better at drawing them all over time #just like. so much

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