#i want them and i want to be them | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

blueskittlesart · 3 months ago

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i’ve started babysitting for a VERY christian family which is great because they pay me a lot of money but as someone who was raised almost completely agnostic it’s kind of insane. the 2 year old keeps asking me to read her stories from the bible. (why are we reading david and goliath to a 2 year old????) the 5 year old told me today that he was going to bring his legos to heaven with him. he also has repeatedly told me that the lego spaceships he builds are stronger than jesus. (not sure what to say to that. do i deny it??? are things allowed to be stronger than jesus??) had to stop myself mid sentence today because i almost told them im not going to heaven which would DEFINITELY have caused several meltdowns. they’re also both completely fascinated by my nose ring

#i also had to tell them no today because mom said no tv and they DESPERATELY wanted to watch a 4-dvd set of recorded sermons #religious children are terrifying. i do get sundays off tho so #personal

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valtsv · 5 months ago

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stuck between "psychological horror statement" and "objectively the funniest thing you could say to your real flesh and blood dad" in the father's day card aisle

#🐉#im not gonna send either of them to my dad because i value my peace and safety but i really was tempted by the second one #'why do you have to send a card to your dad i thought you hated that guy' well the thing is one time i forgot #when i was like. ten. and his reaction was not something i ever want to relive.

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stemmmm · 28 days ago

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bad youtube clickbait thumbnail that reads "I think I just had a therapy session with a DEMON???"

#gravity falls #gf nevermind all that #the book of bill #bill cipher #dipper pines #theres a tag now so im not gonna link all the context in the post anymore #i have no confidence this one is even funny i just wanted to draw them #we talk about this all the time but its endlessly funny that stump made a billford au and both of us have been like.#so mabel and dipper right? how are mabel and dipper how are they handling the situations. just fine it seems

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tearosepedall · 1 month ago

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EDIT : THIS IS A MEME DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY (and seriously just don’t be Rude????? Like wtf lol)

#edit : Ok mabsifica shippers yall need to chill like…Wtf????#I saw this on twitter and wanted to take a spin on it #and I know mabifica shipper I hear your pled of putting them in the make sence but unpopular #but- I do not want take away the righfully holder of a yuri to a yaoi couple #also for those who are saying I skipped The Tw*nc*t ship YES I INTENTIONALLY DID SKIP IT- NOW PLS DO NOT TAG MY POST WITH THOSE SHIP NAMES #anyway ford face at the last one makes me laugh lol #(Oh god do I have to tag them individually...)#Gravity falls #Billford #Billstan #stanchez #fiddauthor #Mabifica #Dipcifica #fiddlestan #stanley pines #standord pines #dipper pines #mable pines #pacific northwest #bill cipher #fiddleford mcgucket #soos ramirez #melody gravity falls #robbie gravity falls #Sheriff Blubs #Deputy Durland #tambry gravity falls #tearosepedall

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great-and-small · 6 months ago

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Apparently the local university’s undergraduate entomology course sends students to catch insect specimens at the same place I like to go birdwatching, which explains why I saw three enormous frat looking dudes with tiny bug nets and overheard one emphatically say “bro BRO I told you we already have enough lepidopterans”

#I told my brother (in the ag field) this and he said ‘oh those are definitely turf bros’#apparently entomology is a required course if you want to specialize in golf course management which I guess is a career that some desire #and there is some Westside story type beef between the turf bros taking entomology for pest control reasons and future PHDs who love bugs #actually chatted with them later they were very lovely

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lgbtlunaverse · 7 months ago

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The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.

#it's bad if you want i have sex it's also bad if you DON'T want to have sex #god forbid if you're a woman in a heterosexual marriage and aren't in the mood #that's 'withholding sex' and you're clearly abusive scum who should be divorced and left without any of your shared assets.#but if you DO have sex now you're a degenerate freak plotting for the downfall of western society #i don't know what to say i'm just so tired #politics #culture #queerphobia #lgbtqia #misogyny #<it's not the exclusive source but let's be honest sooo much of this is integral to the patriarchy #patriarchy needs access to an underclass they can treat like sex objects but they also don't want them to have any human rights #so sexuality is both obligatory and stigmatized #purity culture #i'm really struggling with tagging this because most of the appropiate tags would- in a beautiful twist of irony- get me booted off tumblr

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titleofpersonage-p01 · 8 months ago

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#palestine #free palestine #israel #israel is committing genocide #i understand both sides of the argument in the comments #but the fact that this can even be some what believable is concerning in itself #always remember that an “us vs them” narrative is dangerous #we cannot deny that innocent lives are being slaughtered #i just want this war to be over #but thats not something thats going to be easily done

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velvetcloak · 3 months ago

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The Olympics but high fashion by Wisdom Kaye

#a very long post #bcs i don't want to part them #wisdom kaye #is a treasure #fashion #olympics #also the way he added palestine #and not the other #;)

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rovermcfly · 3 months ago

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proud to say that I have never once in my life figured out the whodunit in any crime story I've read or watched. I just let the facts and clues wash over me, absorbing absolutely none of it. I am the audience they think of when they throw in red herrings, in case you've ever wondered "who would fall for this obvious false lead". it's me. I am the idiot viewer/reader. not once has an obviously framed clue revealed anything to me. my head is completely empty when I consume these stories.

#rover rambles #I joke a lot about how stupid hastings is #but in truth I am about as good as solving these cases as he is #possibly even worse somehow #and it's not for lack of wanting to solve them #in fact I have attempted it many times #I simply am stupid

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months ago

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The math just adds up!

#dungeon meshi #falin touden #marcille donato #farcille #I always loved how chapter 27 ends with them both so bloody and 28 starts with them in the bath.#not just because of how iconic the bathtub moment is but because you know they had to scrap off so much gore first.#I think everyone in the party took a very long and methodical bath but Falin was basically *all* blood*.#Being covered in blood is one of those 'just girly things' that women deserve to stop being shamed about.#I just don't think Chilchuck is progressive enough. He probably made them take a bath first B*/#Okay jestering aside I want to just highlight -#The magnitude of Marcille's joy at seeing her dearest friend again! Of holding her and sharing her presence in the same room!#Something about this reunion feels like a beautiful dream you are afraid of waking up from...

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badolmen · 1 year ago

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People against piracy fail to realize that no, I can’t just ‘buy it.’ They stopped making DVDs and Blu-Rays. They’re barely offering digital copies for download. I am not spending money I could use for food or bills to pay for a subscription service just so I can always have access to a beloved piece of media. Especially not when the service will remove media on a whim without concern for how the loss of access to that piece will make its artistic conservation nigh impossible.

For example, I recently learned that Disney+ had an original film called Crater. It’s scifi, family friendly, and seems cool - I would love to buy it as a holiday gift for my little brother! But: it’s exclusive to D+ and THEY REMOVED IT LITERALLY MONTHS AFTER ITS RELEASE.

The ONLY way I can directly access this film is through piracy. The ONLY available ‘copies’ of this film are hosted on piracy websites. Disney will NEVER release it in theaters, or as something to buy, and it may NEVER return to the streaming service. It will be LOST because we aren’t allowed to purchase it for personal viewing. If I can’t pay to own it, I won’t pay for the privilege of losing it when corporate decides to put it in a vault.

So yes, I’m going to pirate and support piracy.

Edit: if you are able, use $5 you would otherwise use for a streaming subscription to donate to a GazaFunds campaign.

#edit: go to https://gazafunds.org/ and donate $5 you would otherwise spend on streaming services on a campaign!#ra speaks #piracy #media piracy #pirate to make hondo ohnaka proud #obligatory ‘don’t fucking pirate small authors/artists works wtf dude’ statement.#anyone who’s seen my media bitching before knows I’m a hype man for indie films this ain’t about them #this is about corporate streaming services killing physical media bc sales numbers are less impressive than number of streams #edit: USAmericans stop telling me to buy DVDs and blurays at Walmart. think outside your borders for a hot sec. fun thought exercise.#your experiences are not universal #edit: WHO GOT THIS TO 100k. I JUST WANT TO TALK (this post is my second to hit 100k woahg.)#in other news: fix your fucking posture. drink some fucking water. and go the fuck to bed if it’s late bc it’s for me rn. peace and light.

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lazylittledragon · 2 months ago

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