#i wanna draw it out tbh but its long ish and its silly and i have other stuff i have to work on

[our-inspire-verse]

I've come to make an announcement: Lilith the she demon's a bitch-ass motherfucker. SHe pissed on my fucking wife. That's right. She took her demonic fuckin' quilly dick out and she pissed on my FUCKING wife, and she said her dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Lilith the Demon Woman, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no spikes, no boobs, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. She fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck hell. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on hell. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on HEAVENNNN! How do you like that, SERA? I PISSED ON HEAVEN, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit fucking HELL, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too! - our Lucifer at Lilith about Al

Original under the cut with a link

Link

I've come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch-ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right. He took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my FUCKING wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting. So I'm making a callout post on my Twitter.com. Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby. Tall points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife, so guess what, I'm gonna fuck the earth. That's right, this is what you get! My SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the MOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

[reinabeestudio]

The Fairytale Special (WH AU)

Last week or so I made a document explaining about that Welcome Home AU of mine you have seen me post from time to time (The Fairytale Special). It even explains why it's got such a goddamn long name!!

I updated it recently, so you can read it there (google docs)

Or you can read it here! Under the cut! (kinda long tho)

(^^^^ this was drawn in a magma with other people)

Summary

Sort of a "falling in love with your bodyguard" story, but set in a more fairytale-ish setting? This AU is rather simple compared to others. It doesn't have a well-written, complex concept you may have seen from other artists.

By the way the title, The Fairytale Special, isn’t meant to be pretentious (I swear my ego isn’t that big): it’s not special, it’s a special! It’s meant to be seen kinda like a TV special for Welcome Home! Everyone is still The Silly(™) deep down.

Whaddahell this is self-insert

Yes, I guess it is! The main topic is Wally Darling/The Guard (nickname for my sona in this AU lol). There's also a bit of Howdy Pillar/Eden Mawnten (my Welcome Home OC)

But if you know me, y’know romance is not all there is! I just self-indulged a bit, but I try to make this AU approachable to anyone that might be interested! (Fr I don’t bite)

Ok but what’s the actual goddamn story!!!!!!

Set in a Home that it’s divided in Houses (yes, they’re called the Houses of Home).

There's a celebration for the ruler of a neighbouring kingdom, Queen Eden and Lord Pillar’s engagement in the caterpillar’s land. Obviously everyone has been invited— including Lord Darling! After learning that the most powerful leader in Home would attend their celebration alone, Queen Eden decides to send her personal escort to keep Lord Darling safe: The Guard.

Imagine a road movie but there are horses instead (?)

What else?

I guess I can share some bits of trivia (。・∀・)ノ

The Houses are named after gemstones! Wally’s is called House of Sapphire :]

Some others are House of Spinel (Julie) and House of Chalcedone (Howdy)

Eden’s kingdom is an island!

Home is a mansion in this Special. It even has its own personal library (Wally likes to use it. He’s fallen asleep there more than once)

It was called The Fantasy Special at first, but there aren’t really that many fantasy elements so I changed it. Sometimes I keep calling it that on accident tho

I keep making Wally a bit of a bookworm on accident. Eager to learn?

Tbh I’m still figuring some stuff out, but let it be known not all the classic neighbors (Welcome Home cast) are House leaders

The Special is in written form (so like, a fic). I’ll share it on my personal website only. Yeah, not even gonna post it here (unless I change my mind). Sorry, too nervous lol

I use 🍎👑 when I talk about Wally/Neighbor (Wally/Guard in this case). But sometimes I use 🔖🍎 when I talk about Lord Darling himself (that’s a bookmark emoji!)

Neat I guess, anything more to say?

Ah, I guess we gotta talk boundaries now. I’m aware that my AU isn’t known, but better safe than sorry. It seems mandatory to be clear when it comes to these in this community! So much bitterness lately… let’s work to put it behind. That said, worry not.

Interactions! Feel free to draw your OC in this AU— just remember to credit me :]

If you make fanart/write/etc for it you are obligated by law to tell me (@ me!)

If you wanna do self-insert with this Special, go and be free my friend. True that there are confirmed(?) pairs in this case, but I’m aware how fun these can be! I won’t deny you of that harmless fun

That said, if you don’t like self-shipping and/or prefer canonxcanon, I… don’t think you’ll have a good time with this? Besides the fact that it’s literally a self-insert AU, this Special is mostly for the oc/canon enjoyers out there (platonic, romantic or anything else)

I don’t think this AU has horror elements? But feel free to do these if you wish. Just remember to TW properly!

Regarding NSFW (of the explicit kind, not horror): as long as you are an adult and tag it properly with the official tag (#/PlayfellowXXX), I’m fine with it! Or you can send it to me directly if you want

⚠ However, I don't want any of that weirdo shit near me (inc3st, p3dophilia, wallyc3st/applec3st, you know what I mean).

Can I leave now

Before you go: Lord Darling has a Character AI! (No one asked for it but I made it anyway)

If you talk to him, I’d love to be see it. Mostly outta curiosity but also to configure him better (rizz him up if you want I don’t mind lol I doubt there’s anyone that wants to do that, but it has been stated)

Have fun. Thanks for your company!

[criminally--reid]

library lovers

I h8 the title- n e ways... here's the fix that's been promised to be posted at least twice a week for the past month 😌✋🏽also if u want untagged yk who u are smsbsj lmk,, i just thought id use the anon tag so u could see it snsbsj n e ways let's get on wiv d shit show

warnings: awkward chaotic gay, general smutty stuff y'know, mutual masturbation, i’ve never written mxm fic before so yonkers :| 

word count: 2.6k

Pairing: bi!spencer x (dom-ish)male!reader 

//a.n.\\ somehow the reader ends up in charge and i kinda like it tbh. i'm shit at storylines,  but honestly,, highschool homophobe masturbating with spencer reid? Call that character development 

`°•○●○•°`

You hadn't seen Spencer in years. Remembering the terms the two of you ended on, you weren't surprised either. All throughout highschool, you were the movie-esque tormentors of the frail, nerdy kid. The bully that wasn't actually supposed to exist. The absolute nightmare that had kids like Spencer trembling, dreading to relive the same terror another day. 

Shock couldn't even begin to cover what you felt the day you watched him walk into the library you now owned. You had been working on forgetting him since graduation. Just when you thought the remnants of Spencer had dripped entirely from your memory, everything came flooding in the matter of milliseconds the moment he walked through your door. All the times you watched him eat alone, pick his things up alone after someone had thrown them out of his hands; all the times you could've stepped up and just chose not to. You promised yourself you'd be different. Now was your chance. 

You subtly watch Spencer as he looks through the many isles of books. Beginning at young adult, trailing quickly to non-fiction, and eventually ending up in the classic section. He doesn't spend much time amongst the books - 5 minutes at the most since he walked in - before bringing a stack of 6 books up to the counter; you anxiously waiting to scan him in. 

"Did- did you find all your books alright?" You manage to ask. Spencer merely nods his head, crossing his arms and bringing one of his hands up to his mouth, chewing on his fingernails. His brows furrow and you're worried he's about to say something. 

"I'm a little surprised to see you working here actually." This throws you off. You did not plan for this- this confrontation. 

"I take it you remember me?" 

"I'm not really one to forget things, you know." Fair enough. 

"Well, yes. I actually run the place now. My grandfather had passed it on to me." 

"Oh he's…? I'm so sorry for your loss." 

Spencer's look of sincerity throws you off. After all the years of you being his worst fear, he still had room in his heart to be genuinely kind towards you. 

"It's fine, really. It was so long ago now. And besides- now I have this grand, ancient bookstore." You end with a chuckle and finish scanning the barcodes in each of his books. 

"Thank you- uh actually, could you help me find something else?"

"Of course! What're you looking for?" 

"Everyone keeps recommending me Donna Tart, where could I find some of her work?" 

"Follow me," you gesture and move from behind the counter. 

You walk him over to the very back of the store where all the dark academia-esq books are. While sifting through the books, he asks you a question that catches you completely off guard; his voice nothing above a whisper. 

"And I take it that you don't still hate me-" 

You immediately know what he's talking about. How silly of you to think the past wouldn’t be brought up.  

You clear your throat before speaking up. "I- n-no of course not. I- I uh- I know this is extremely cliche, and I'm not trying to excuse away any of the horrible things I did to you but- I was hiding." 

"From what?" Spencer chimes in quietly. 

"I just didn't know how to feel about myself. Gay this and gay that- it was all so negative. I didn't want to be known for something that was apparently so wrong. I definitely couldn't let the football playing circle jerkers I called my friends know about how I felt towards other guys. An-and I saw how they treated people like you and I didn't want that, so I joined them." 

"So you're gay?" Spencer asks, and you nod slowly. "And you and your 'circle jerking buddies' tortured me because you all thought I was gay?" 

"Well- I- we uh- that's what they said. I knew it wasn't good, but I didn't do anything because of what I was. I know the word 'sorry' will never make up for anything I've ever done or said to you, but I am so so sorry, Spencer." 

"You guys just knew I was gay? -Gaydar that strong, huh?" Spencer ends in a chuckle, easing up your tension, allowing you to slip out a soft laugh, too. 

"Obviously, it wasn't too good. I somehow managed to skate by for four years." 

"That you did." For the first time in years, when you look at Spencer, he doesn't look upset. A content, lazy smile accompanies his happy eyes as he. "Well- actually, I'm not entirely gay so I guess their gaydar needed some tweeking, hm?" 

"Oh, you're-" you attempt, but get cut-off. 

"Bi? Yeah. I realized I was bi when I realized I had a crush on you and your tenth grade girlfriend. What about you?" 

Still skimming the pages of a Donna Tart book, never looking up from it. So nonchalant. Him being so upfront with you was honestly exciting. You never imagined that you'd be remotely friendly with Spencer Reid, let alone him revealing he had a crush on you. "Ah, about junior year, I figured out I kinda had a thing for you." 

"Say, uh," Spencer started, tucking his hair behind his ear and slipping the book back onto the shelf. "I liked you; you liked me. Why don't we hang out sometime or something-" 

You could tell Spencer was trying hard to mask his enthusiasm. You were too. 

"Erm- yeah totally! I get off in about an hour actually; I could call you, and we could grab coffee or something." 

"Sounds great," Spencer says hurriedly as he fishes around in his pocket, drawing out a small slip of paper and drawing the pen from his shirt pocket. He hands you the freshly used paper with his number inscribed on it in smudged black ink. 

The next hour, excitement coursed through you. You're bustling around, fidgeting, unshelving and re-shelving books, sweeping, mopping - anything to keep your mind off of the end of your shift. The busiest yet slowest hour of your life. Your shift ends and your excitement reaches its peak. Your finger hovers over the call button at the bottom of your screen, hesitating. For a split second you get the courage to press call, but then you immediately regret it - that is until his hurried, excited voice slips through the speaker. 

"Hey, y/n! It's Spencer! Uh- you know.. that.. of course. Anyways, uh there's this coffee shop about a block away from my place. I wondered if maybe you'd wanna go and have an early dinner or something." 

You can't help but chuckle at his excitement; trying to calm down your own. "That sounds great, Spencer. What's the place?" 

"Café Negra-" 

"What?!" you cut him off "I go there all the time! How have I never seen you?" 

"What? That's insane. How have we not crossed each other there?" 

"No clue.. Anyways I'll meet you there- uh about 20?" 

"Perfect." Spencer hangs up without any formal goodbyes, but you couldn't care less - you couldn't wait to meet him at the coffee shop. 

The date - which neither of you bothered to assign that title to the event, but you both knew it was, in fact, a date - went impressively well. It's like you two had never been enemies in the first place. Those four years in high school wiped clean of any hard feelings as the two of you drank coffee way too strong for 6p.m., ate double chocolate muffins, and laughed away. 

When it comes time to leave, Spencer stands up first, throwing away his cup and muffin wrapper; you follow quickly and do the same. 

A mutual agreement was somehow made to take it back to Spencer's place. Maybe it was the lack of goodbyes that he seemed prone to. Whatever it was, the evening didn't feel finished. 

Once inside his cozy apartment, he welcomes you to his couch before maneuvering to the tv stand, kneeling down and pulling out three movies. He gestures for you to choose one, and you choose Titanic. Not the greatest choice of the three, but you had a feeling you wouldn't be focused on the movie too much anyways. 

He puts the disc into the player before joining you on the couch. About twenty minutes into the movie, he moves closer to you, resting his shoulder slowly, cautiously as if asking permission. You ease his nerves by welcoming his head on your shoulder and leaning against him in return. The next half an hour is full of stolen glances, light touches, and snuggling. All innocent until Spencer slides his hand up your thigh. You try not to mind it much. Maybe he's just absentminded in all the contact. He doesn't know what he's doing. You try to focus on the movie and not on his hand getting ever so dangerously close until you just can't anymore. Looking down at him, he's already making eye contact with you, driving you wild. Instinctually you connect your lips with his. 

Spencer shuffles over and straddles your lap, never disconnecting your lips. Your hands roam around his shoulders and back before dipping underneath the hem of his shirt and pulling it off. He makes quick work of returning the favor. After a few more chaste kisses, he stands up, pulling you up with him, and pushes his pants to the floor with you following suit. Spencer places his fingers under your chin, bringing your face up to his in an attempt to place another open-mouthed kiss on your bite-swollen lips. However, you muster up a burst of courage and manage to flip the script. Placing your fingers on Spencer’s chest and holding him at arm's length, you keep eye contact while you take a seat on one end of the couch. You motion for him to take his seat at the other end. 

Spencer, still unsure of the current situation, watches you move. He watches as you run your fingertips up and down your thighs. As you wet the palm of your hand with your tongue before running it up and down your shaft. Lightly tracing your fingertips over your reddened head, hissing at the contact. 

“Your turn,” you say barely above a whisper. 

Spencer’s eyes go wide, but he still obliges, wetting his hand and repeating your actions on himself. Hissing and cursing at the contact with his eager cock. He soon gets lost in his own world of pleasure. Moving faster and moaning barely-there profanities. Watching the show, you bring your hand back to yourself. Your eyes shut as you listen to Spencer; his pretty gasps like music to your ears. 

“Y-y/n? I’m- I’m close.” 

“Awh, so soon? You sure you can’t hold on for me just a little longer?” 

Spencer lets out a strangled moan and forces himself to slow his pace. Watching him struggle to contain himself turns you on even more. His desperate whines and pleas for release getting you closer to the edge. “Look at me, bubbas,” you coax. 

Spencer looks up at you, pushing a tuft of hair from his eyes. His other hand still desperately attached to the base of his cock, awaiting further instruction. 

“Listen.. We’re gonna cum together okay?” Spencer only manages a nod in response so you continue. “I want you to move faster again; get closer. But I want you to let me know when you’re about to cum, okay?” 

You’re met with a furious nod for an answer as he works at his waist, bringing himself closer to his climax; you simultaneously doing the same.

“F-fuck fuckfuckfuck! -M gonna cum. Shit! I’m cumming!” Spencer's cries of pleasure send you over the edge and you both spill over together. Your head dips back over the armrest of the couch as you try to catch your breath. You bring your head back up and look at Spencer, only to see him leaning sideways against the back of the couch, still out of breath and coates in a layer of sweat. 

“Why don’t we go get cleaned up, hm?” 

Spencer nods his head in agreement before getting up off the couch and leading you to the bathroom. You definitely aren’t going home tonight.