#i wanna continue working on it so bad but i need 2 SLEEP
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spaciebabie · 2 years ago
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2 spoinger doodles i did. 2nd one i did 2day in Preparation for Spinger Maid Outfit
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getosbigballsack · 7 months ago
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Random thought! - Husband Gojo x Wife Reader-chan #inside the diary
Hear me out! Gojo read your thoughts in your diary and came to realize that he was a terrible husband to you.
He knew he was a good lay, hence the reason he managed to knock you up three times. But as of lately, he came to realize that you weren't interested in having sex with him.
At first, he thought it was just because you were too tired, having to take care of the kids while he works, all day by yourself (in which he understands, and he praises you for being such a wonderful mother).
But that wasn't the case. He just happened to come home early from work while you were out shopping with the kids, and he got a hold of your diary.
Interestingly, he took it upon himself to skim through the pages of your book, just to see what's inside your little head. Nothing out of the ordinary, just little notes and reminders to yourself about the task you had to complete and a few words of encouragement here and there.
He usually doesn't read through your thoughts, always thinking that if you had an issue you'd come and talk to him, so he was about to put your diary back where he found it because he didn't want to pry further into your thoughts, but that's until one page in particular caught his eye.
I find it difficult to enjoy sex with my husband nowadays and I don't know why?
Words in blue handwriting are written beautifully on the paper. He kept on reading, and as he continued to move further down the line, he felt his heart break.
It’s just me, but I don't think I'm attractive enough to have sex with my husband.
I wanted to suggest the last time we had sex [that was a month ago], but I didn't wanna ruin the moment for him because he looked like he was having fun.
Satoru came home today and wanted to have sex. I told him no. He never forced himself on me. He only kissed me goodnight and left to go sleep in the guest room. I know he was upset but did he really have to leave?
It's been 2 months, and Satoru hasn't tried touching me since that night. Am I not worthy of loving anymore? He doesn't even buy me flowers anymore or take me out on dates.
He doesn't compliment me anymore, doesn't tell me that I'm beautiful. He doesn’t even call me baby girl, doll or even honey.
No more I love you, only kisses to the forehead and peck on the lips before he leaves for work in the morning.
He comes home late, I'm always alone with the kids, no more family dinners, no more kitchen, bedroom, and bathroom conversations. No more late-night kisses, no more holding me tightly in his arms while he sleeps.
Does he not want me anymore?
Sometimes I wanna visit his office with the children but I’m afraid that he’ll find my presence a bit annoying. I feel lonely without him here with me.
I should've said yes that night and spread my legs for him,
That's my duty as his wife.
To have fulfilled all my husband's needs without complaint.
But it hurts to have sex, I'm just not in the mood. I'm too tired, I just need my husband to hold me, but he's not there.
I can't complain, he's the reason I don't have to work.
But is it so bad to ask my husband to love me without having the need to touch me?
The last entry to your diary reads.
I'm going to do it today, bare the pain and have sex with my husband, just so that I can feel his love once again. 
Now he knows the real reason you won’t have intercourse with him, or let's say the reason you don’t enjoy having sex with him. You feel as though he doesn’t love you anymore, and he needs to fix that. So, until he can figure out a way to prove to you just how much he loves you, he’ll have to deprive himself of your warm loving touch. 
Later in the day when you came home with the kids, you saw your husband cooking up a storm in the kitchen. “Hey baby girl, want something to eat? It’s been a while hasn’t it.” too stunned to even say a word, you just watched as your kids, ages 3, 4 and 6 ran over to their dad and engulfed him in a big hug. He giggled and stopped whatever he was doing to bend to his children’s height and kissed every single of them on their cheeks. “Hey boys. Did you all take your mom out shopping today?” Oh, that’s right you’re a boy mom. You managed to pop three boys, all of them came out looking just like their dad, especially your eldest son. 
The boys chatted away with their dad until he excused himself and walked over to you and wrapped his arms tightly around your body. You're in a state of shock, unable to move for a moment until he whispers, “can I get a hug back?” and you did give him a hug. 
“Welcome home, have a seat, dinner’s almost ready. I cooked vegetable curry today, I know it’s your favourite,” and indeed it is your favourite. For the rest of the day, he spent time in the kitchen cooking while chatting with his kids, not without taking small glances at you. You all ate dinner together, got the kids ready for bed when night falls, before preparing for bed yourselves. 
You remembered that you wrote in your diary that you were about to try and have sex with your husband, all for the sake of feeling his love again, but that didn’t happen. Instead, you found your husband already waiting for you on the bed, fully dressed in pjs, a cup of your favourite tea in his hand and a warm loving smile on his face. 
He immediately started up a conversation with you, asking you about your day and your trip to the shopping centre. You had no clue what was going on inside your husband’s head, but it’s been a while since he last sat down and had small conversations like these, and you weren’t about to miss this opportunity. 
So with a smile on your face, you told everything that happened today and even the fact that you had to buy a bag of grapes you had no intentions of buying, but you did so because your 3 year old son stole and ate a few while you picked up a bag of oranges. The conversation went all a while until he sighed. 
“Y/N,” he whispered in a serious tone. “We need to talk. I was going to wait until tomorrow, but I can’t bear the fact that my wife would be going to bed with doubts about our relationship and my love for you.”
You swallow thickly and rest your now empty cup against the nightstand before turning to face your husband fully. He reached his hand out for you, and you gently placed your left hand in his. He wrapped his large hand around your finger and gently pulled you until you were straddling his lips. You swallowed that thick lump yet again, before whispering, “So what is it that we need to talk about.”
“Why do you always refuse to communicate your feelings with me?” he asked as he let go of your hand and wrapped both hands around your waist and rested his head up against your chest. “I know I haven’t been a good husband to you these past few months, but I don’t want you to think that I don’t love you or that you’re not worthy of loving.”
“I don’t understand what you mean.”
He sighed heavily before taking a deep breath. “I found your diary in the living room when I got home, and I read through your notes.” Your body tensed up in his lap, your mind immediately racing towards negative thoughts. Is he angry? Why did you have to carelessly leave your diary out in the open for him to see. 
“Oh!”
“I’m sorry for reading through your diary, but I’m happy that I did because my wife won’t communicate with me,” he said with a frustrated sigh. 
You frowned, “Would you have listened even if I tried?”
“I would’ve dropped everything and listened to whatever it is that you have to say. I know it's my duty to ensure that my wife is living her best happy life, and that it’s also my responsibility to take care of your wellbeing, but I can’t always know what's going on with you if you don’t communicate with me.” 
Communication on your end has always been a big issue in your relationship with your husband. It bothered him and he’d hope that after a while you would’ve grown out of your bad habit, but he guess he’s wrong, because here you are now after 8 years of being a relationship total and that includes the four years of marriage, and 3 kids later, you still struggling to figure out a way to communicate your feelings with him. 
“I broke my heart when I read that you thought that as my wife, your duty is to only provide for me sexually or even the fact that you don’t think that you’re attractive enough to have sex with me. What hurts me the most is that you have so many doubts about my love for you. Y/N you know that I love you right?”
“I do,” your voice trembled slightly as you answered. 
“Then why are you doubting my feelings for you? I apologise for leaving you to sleep in the guest room that night, it was wrong of me to be upset all because you told me no.” There was a moment of silence, you figured he was waiting for a response in which you never gave.
“I know I don’t say this as much as I need to, but I love you. I LOVE YOU so very much. I love you as my best friend, my wife and I love you even more as the mother of my children.” Tears started to obstruct your vision as you stared off at your wedding portrait that was above your bed and listened as your husband poured his hurt out to you. 
“I need you to stop thinking that you are not worthy of loving because you are more than worthy. You’re an amazing woman, an amazing wife, and an amazing mother to our children. Just the fact that you're a mother makes you worthy of loving.” 
“Satoru… I- I,” you stuttered, trying to formulate the words inside your mouth, but even if you did, what are you going to say to your husband? You had not one clue. 
“I’m not a mind reader Y/N, so you need to start communicating your feelings with me, because if you don’t tell me, I’m not going to always know,” he said to you as he snuggled his head against your chest. 
“I- I’ll do better.” 
“I’m happy to hear that, and I promise to show you just how much I love you and do whatever it is to ensure that my wife is happy, because your happiness means the most to me. I’ll get you those flowers you want, and I’ll try my best to buy you loads of flowers in the future. And about visiting my office.”
“Yes?” you said. 
“I would love for you to pop up at my office one day with the kids and surprise me. My workers have been dying to meet my beautiful wife and children. And about the late-night work meetings. I can’t promise you that there won’t be any more late-night meetings, but I'll do my best to get home as early as I can to be with you and the kids. I don’t want you to feel as though I’ve abandoned you with the kids. I’ll take a few days off from work too and take the ends out. You’re right we barely have family time.”
“Thank you,” you said smiling as you allowed those tears to run down your cheeks. 
“I’ll do better as your husband. It wasn't my intention to not cuddle and hold you tightly while we sleep. Baby you know you can always smack me in the head or do that cute silly little thing you do and crawl underneath my arms if you want to cuddle with me,” he said to you, and you let out a small giggle. 
He chuckled too as he removed one hand from around your waist to cradle your cheek. “Lastly, this is about our sex life. If I make you feel physical pain, or uncomfortable at any time during intercourse you need to let me know because the last thing I want to do is hurt you. In your diary you said that you wanted to suggest the last time we had sex. I want you to tell me what it is.”
Your face heated up immediately, why would he have to bring that up now. Couldn’t he have waited until a better time. But nonetheless despite the obvious look of embarrassment on your face you whispered, “I was wondering if… if…”
“Yes?” 
“I was wondering if we could try something outside the usual vanilla sex,” you said to him, and he cocked his eyebrow towards you. “It’s not that I don’t enjoy vanilla sex, I love having vanilla sex with you and you know how to be rough when you need to be. But I thought it would be nice if we could do something different.” 
“What do you suggest?” he asked with a sunning grin on his face. 
“Maybe we could try using some sex toys.” 
“Sex toys heh?” he said, and you quickly covered up your face with your hands. “I’m open, I don’t mind getting a few sex toys here and there for us to use. I can order us a few online on another day.”
“Ok…”
“Good girl. I love you.” he whispered as he kissed your lips. "I promise I'll be a better husband for you."
“I love you too, Satoru.”
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evanpeterspeter · 1 month ago
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Kinktober day 2
Alex (Adult world) - Deep throating - wet dream
Cw: M receiving, wet dream, 5 in one male soap and etc
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You had stayed over at Alex’s apartment, due to not having anywhere to stay for the night… Well, maybe a few nights, but other than that you had a roof over your head. The night was calm, You and Alex just finished having some cheap Chinese food and you borrowed his shower. Unfortunately, you did have to use his Irish Springs 5-1 soap. (Oh God) After showering you were wearing one of his borrowed band tee’s. “Hey, I hope you don’t mind, if I don’t have a couch,” Alex said while awkwardly rubbing the back of his head. He was shirtless and had some navy blue boxers. You shook your head with a slight giggle. “That’s okay, I could just sleep on the floor.” You shrugged. “NO! No no no. You don’t need to, I can sleep on the floor instead.” “Alex, I don’t mind. You already did me a favor in letting me crash at yours.” You grabbed the blanket you had brought from your old house and placed it on the floor. Alex quickly scooped it up from the floor, and tossed it on the bed, then proceeded to scoop you up over his shoulder and tossed you on the bed. You let out a small yelp and giggled. “Alexxx!” You proclaimed. “Nope, don’t wanna hear nothin’.” He grabbed his blanket and tossed it on the floor next to the bed. “Alex, you don’t have to sleep on the floor. I feel bad.”
“Why feel bad? I offered, even though I tend to run hot in bed.” He said with a wink at the end. You couldn’t help but turn red. “Well, I tend to run cold in bed.” You felt smart with that response, even though that was mid. “Yeah?” Alex shed a smirk as he stood up, towering over you from the side of the bed. You smiled widely as he plopped next to you. “If you say so.” He said as he turned off the bedside lamp. “Again, Thanks for having me over, Alex.” You said pleadingly. “Yeah of course, what kind of manager would I be if I didn’t.” You slapped his arm. “Oh shut up, that’s weirdddd.” You said in a whiny tone. “Oh, you love it,” Alex said while lying down and turning his body away from you. You rolled your eyes with a playful scoff. “Goodnight, work, boss, manager.” You said sarcastically and with a small laugh to it at the end. “Goodnight, Beautiful,” Alex mumbled. You felt your heart fall out of your ass, slightly turned on but flustered by the surprise comment.
The night slowly went by, it had to have been around 3 am, and you and Alex’s limbs were entangled together, you were facing each other, his arms wrapped around your waist, his arm under your body, holding your lower back, and the other on your ass cheek. Your arms were curled to his chest and you had his thigh in between your legs. Your soft and soaked core rested against his bare thigh, grinding against his thigh. You let out some gentle moans in your sleep, which had woken up Alex. Alex woke up kinda groggy at first but immediately realized what was happening. He was becoming very flustered and turned on. He started complying with you, by gently moving his thigh and pulling your hips forward with each grind you made. You let out some louder whimpers, with your mouth agape. Alex couldn’t help but let out some low moans, as he had an aching hard-on.
You continued rocking your hips messily and making sloppy moans, as you felt your core tighten more and more. Alex’s tip was rubbing against the top of your cunt, making moans escape from his lips. “F-fuck..” He whispered. You kept riding until you finally broke your edge, creaming onto his warm thigh as you let out soft whimpers. Your whimpers had woken you up from your wet dream. You heard Alex’s breathing heightened, causing you to shift up to see if he was awake. As you moved to look up, you felt a warm puddle of some sort of fluid you thought, was in your underwear and on his thigh. ‘Oh my God his thigh!’ You screamed in your head. You looked up at him. “A-Alex.. I’m so sorry. I-I don’t know what came out of me but I’m so so sorry.” You started to become embarrassed and turn red. “Hey, it’s okay. You only had a wet dream, love” You felt your heart sink. “I-I what? You’re lying..” You said in disbelief. Alex chuckled. “Yea, you did.” You resulted in covering your face with your hands. “It was cute… Don’t be embarrassed.” You looked up slowly with a flushed face. “Noooo”
“Yeahhhh.” He moved the blanket off of himself, keeping it on you to stay warm. Alex came back with a clean pair of boxers. “Here, these might be more warmer.” You were careful not to sit up completely on the bed so you wouldn’t get any more of your wetness on the sheets. As he crawled back onto the bed you noticed his boner and it was very prominent. You bit your lip, and gently placed the given boxers of his on the side of the bed. As he laid down and was about to grab the blanket, you stopped him. “Alex?” You said innocently. “Yeah?” He said in a very seductive tone. “C-Can… Can I fix it?” Alex tilted his head and had a soft smile on his lips. “Fix what?” You pouted knowing what he was doing. “You know what I mean.” He tilted his head, pretending not to know. “No, I don’t. What do you want to fix? And how will it be fixed?” He said teasing you at this point. You groaned and had an irritated laugh. “Oh my God..” You pulled down his boxers abruptly, causing his cock to spring up. You did not hesitate to kiss the tip of his aching tip, looking up into his eyes. Alex let out a breathy moan and his eyes were fluttering. “F-Fuck.. You can fix anything you want.” You nodded with a big cheeky smile and took his hard cock into your mouth. He was so big and girthy. It even strained your jaw from how thick he was. You started to bob your head up and down, taking his whole length down your throat. You gripped your thumbs on the inside of your palms to prevent gagging. He politely grabbed the back of your head, bunching your hair in a makeshift ponytail, and pushed your head up and down. He let out a mouthful of profanities as he tossed his head to the baseboard of the bed. “Fuck, beautiful. You’re so good at this.” You looked up at him with big doe eyes, which was the final doing to make him cum. “I’m gonna cum.” Alex said as he spurted his hot white ropes into your mouth.
As you pulled away, you swallowed his cum and wiped your mouth. His eyes widened with shock. “Damn, that’s so hot.” You gave an innocent giggle and got up to change into his boxers. You finally made it back to the bed and Alex pulled you into a little spoon position. “Thank you.” He gently spoke. “Anything for my manager.” He rolled his eyes. “Bitch, shut the fuck up.”
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Taglist: @evansonlylove @xrag-dollx @warrenlipkaswife @jazz-berry @am3ricanh0rrorwh0re @fear-is-truth
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writing-rat · 8 months ago
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Midnight Snacking
Pairings: Jenna and Aliyah, Jenna x Reader
Content Warning: None, just fluff
Summary: Aliyah wants chicken nuggets but doesn't want to drive so she asks Jenna. She gets sassy when she says yes to you however.
WC: 651
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It was a warm Spring night and you were at the Ortega household. Jenna was on break and she was happy to be. Sometimes work exhausted her but she loved it and she would never stop. When she had breaks, she prioritised family time and hanging out with her friends. You were happy to be included. When she announced her next break, you were immediately contacted by Natalie. “As a surprise for Jenna, do you wanna come over for the next few weeks while Jenna is on break?” Natalie asked. 
“Yeah! I would love to,” you immediately responded, in shock admittedly. 
That led you to be at the Ortega household for a few days before Jenna would come home. Aliyah wanted you to come early so you had, sleeping in Jenna’s room and then help cook breakfast. Safe to say, Aliyah loved you even more for that. You would get her snacks whenever she asked, mainly when she was on live. Luckily Jenna didn’t go on social media much so she didn’t know you were there. When she arrived though, she was shocked and hugged you immediately, kissing you before even greeting her family. Safe to say she missed you.
Now, you were currently on the bed, a laptop in between both of your legs where you were watching Breaking Bad. She leaned into you as she held your waist gently. You also leaned into her, holding her hand gently as you were relaxed, happy to be watching the show with her due to never seeing it before. That made her say you needed to watch it, so you decided to while cuddling her. 
Aliyah soon opened the door after a few knocks. “Jenna, can you get me some chicken nuggets from McDonald’s?” Aliyah asked, draping herself over the bed. “Or I will starve to death,” she added dramatically. Jenna rolled her eyes.
“Get it yourself. You can drive,” Jenna spoke with a smile.
“But I don’t want to drive, I want to stay in bed while you get it,” Aliyah whined more. You couldn’t help but laugh as Jenna kept bickering with Aliyah.
“I will be honest… McDonald’s does sound good,” you admitted.
“What would you like?” Jenna asked immediately. 
“Nuggets and fries,” you immediately spoke.
“I’ll be back,” Jenna confirmed and got up, letting you have control over what you watched.  
“No fair, get me some too, please,” Aliyah begged. 
“Fine, thank Y/N for this,” Jenna spoke before she left. 
“Thank you,” Aliyah spoke before she was going next to you. “What do you want to watch?” Aliyah asked with a grin. 
“I don’t mind,” you hummed as you let her take control. She immediately put on Netflix before she put on Yes Day with a smirk.
You regretted telling her you had first gotten a crush on Jenna when she was on Yes Day when you watched it when you were younger. “Fuck you,” you spoke, glaring at her. 
“Not my type,” she sassed and you rolled your eyes, continuing to watch the film while waiting for Jenna. Soon enough Jenna came back and Aliyah immediately spoke. “I thanked my saviour, she can confirm. I love you too for getting me food and not denying it to me,” Aliyah spoke with a smirk. Jenna just sighed. “You have put on Yes Day, huh?” she asked, recognising the scene she was on. It was the Kablowey scene. 
“Yes,” Aliyah responded, grabbing her nuggets and smiling as she ate one. “I will leave you 2 be now,” Aliyah confirmed as Jenna turned off Yes Day, cringing at her scene. “Goodbye, never ask me for food again,” Jenna said. Aliyah laughed, approaching her room.
“I lied, I didn’t crave these but thank you baby,” you spoke to Jenna. Jenna slapped your arm as you just laughed before you both relaxed again, continuing Breaking Bad while sharing the fries and nuggets.
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artificialbreezy · 3 months ago
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AN: this has been in my head for days, weeks, months even. then @as-above-so-below1000 brought it up and i said fuck it i’m posting this.
CW: somno (i swear both parties consented before never fear) husband matt gets his own warning, dirty talk (Matt the yapologist), some pet names. the usual breezy shit
Taglist - @thefallennightmare @xxkittenkissesxx @as-above-so-below1000 @abiomens @alloraiona @itsafullmoon @english-fucker @shilohrosechicken
You can join the taglist here.
WC - 929
NSFW under the cut ◡̈
You always told Matty, once there were those 2 rings sitting on your finger you didn’t care what he did. The first month of marriage was sweet, soft, loving. enjoying each other's company as much as possible before he had to leave again. you never minded, this was his job and you loved him anyway. 3 days was all this time, not bad at all. 
When he texted you that his flight got delayed and he’d be home around 3am, you were determined to stay awake. Kiss your husband, tell him how much you missed him and listen to him ramble about the shows. But when you put on Totoro at 2, you accepted fate and fell asleep on the couch. You’d definitely hear him come in. 
Matt was met with no dogs and no little wife when he walked into the house. Just the subtle sounds of the totoro credits. 
Setting his bag down, and kicking his shoes off he worked his way towards the living room. He smiled to himself when he saw his wife on the couch, half on the throw pillow, his old bloodline shirt and some knee high socks. 
She looks so soft, he thought to himself while he bent down to rest his hand on the soft of your bare thigh. 
Moving his hand slowly towards the inner part of her thigh, watching her body automatically adjust to his touch. The soft hum that came out of her mouth was all he needed. 
“Hi, pretty. Missed you so much,” his hand moved slowly to the inside of your thigh. Soft circles, watching your face for any sign of discomfort. His hand moving up and stopping right at your clothed core. “Gonna show you how much I missed you, bet she’s crying for me. Can't just leave her needy.” 
His hands ran across the lace on the band of your panties, debating with himself if he should keep them on you or ruin them. Moving down, he stopped before he could pull them away. Pressing a soft kiss to your inner thigh, “love you, so much.” He saw your eyes flutter open, “Matty?” smiling up at you he spoke - “Hi baby, go back to sleep. Just loving on you a little.” Your eyes closed with a soft hum, signaling he could continue. 
He presses his nose against your core and inhales, “fuck - this is what heaven is huh?” His tongue licks a stripe upwards, pressing a kiss to your clit. Groaning against you as you grind against him. He watches your sleep ridden state tremble against his mouth. He pulls back a little, and runs his finger through your folds before slowly pushing his finger into your crying hole. “Jesus baby, don't think you even needed to be stretched out first,” he spoke while he started to curve his finger upwards. 
His eyes were trained on your cunt swallowing his finger, nothing was more attractive to him than you sucking him in anytime he wanted to feel you. He was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard the soft whimper fall from your mouth. “Mmmm, Matty-” as your hips started moving against his hand. 
“What baby?” His tone was loving, soft. He looked up to see your eyes heavy, cheeks flushed. You've never been more pretty, than right now. “You need more?” Nodding your head, “please, ” your eyes starting to close again. His hand came up to rest on your cheek, tapping gently “cmon, open your eyes pretty. Wanna see ‘em when I sink into you. Can go back to bed after that.” 
He pulled his shorts down just enough so his cock was freed, he brought his hand closer to his mouth and spit. Wrapping his hand around his cock, he stroked himself once before lining himself with your entrance. “Matty-” he cut you off by pushing just the tip in. “There you go, c'mon honey, relax for me. Gotta let me in.” He watched you take a breath, as he sank further in. 
“Look at you, sucking me right in now. She missed me huh? God, you're such a mess.” He groaned as he ruts his cock against you. He pulls his hips out, before driving in again. “Fuck, squeezin’ me so good. Look at that, you just open up for me huh?”
You nod, drool starting to form at the corners of your mouth. 
He moves forward, pressing his lips against yours. There’s no fight, he’s taking full control. He bucks his hips a little harder than usual, just enough that you gasp into his kiss. Giving him full access to explore the inside of your mouth. 
He bites down on your lips, “missed you so much honey, so fucking much. Never leaving you again, you’re coming with me from now on.” 
His hands falls in between you two, starts rubbing soft circles on your sensitive bud. 
“You can cum, don’t gotta ask. Wanna feel it baby. Need to feel it, yeah? Please honey, i’m so close.” 
There’s no words that fall from your mouth, just frantic nodding and a whine. 
“Fuck, you’re close huh? Cmon, give it to me. I’m right here. Be my good little wife,” you cut him off with your lips against his. Grinding harder against him. With a groan, he stills his movements. Coating your walls with him. 
“Missed you so fucking much, honey bee. Gonna clean you up, go back to sleep. I’m right here.” He presses a soft kiss to your head and that was all you needed before sleep took over again.
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mikajunie · 5 months ago
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how to deal with failure when all you know how to do is beat up yourself (as an adhder)
please read this if you are a chronic self-loather like myself.
i used to hate myself for everything i did; the way i talk and walk, my accomplishments, my daily activities, how i cannot keep up with my peers, all that jazz. and especially as a late-diagnosed adhder this gets worse overtime. i ended up getting into a 6-month burnout, failed 3 classes and have to extend one semester, and i had lost my identity as a person.
overall i was just a breathing, walking flesh with depressive thoughts every day.
but after many many months of rediscovering myself, i have come up with the conclusion that life gets easier when i don't fucking hate myself.
shocker, right? ik this is probably like a 'obviously' type of thing, but i think many ppl with adhd can confirm that this is one of the hardest pills to swallow.
but trust me, you don't need to feel bad!!! and i will tell you how to do it down below. pls read, i hope it helps.
(keep in mind im not a psychiatrist or a therapist btw i just wanna help fellow ppl with adhd)
reminder #1: adhd makes you more prone to making mistakes - beating yourself up for every failure is torture.
as people with adhd, we are more prone to making more mistakes and questionable decisions. we are just built that way. we can work on it, but that's our baseline.
self loathing encourages you to beat up your baseline. your default state. your non-productive mode.
beating yourself up for making a mistake is literally like beating up a cat for sleeping. humans are bound to make mistakes, and us with adhd are bound to make more. it's fine, let yourself breathe. im not saying we cannot do anything right or that our mistakes are permissible, but missing an alarm clock or forgetting things we want to say are not surprising. it's just embedded inside us, so either be miserable for the rest of your life or work on reframing your thoughts on failure in general.
reminder #2: you can learn how to be better even if you don't beat yourself up for it
these neurotypical adults who tell you that you should feel bad about failing are stupid. and whoever tell you that negative reinforcement is needed for you to get better are the dumbest motherfuckers ever.
you don't need to feel bad to ge better.
in fact, once you don't feel too bad about it, you can focus more on how to do better in the future instead of replaying the past over and over again.
literally after almost failing college, i only realized that i should not be hard on myself. literally. i remember deciding i should try being nice on myself and now boom! i feel better AND i actually have been working towards fixing my life more and more.
and you know whats the best part?? i can finally start enjoying my life again!!
reminder #3: not everything you do is a failure. seriously.
this is a thought pattern i keep seeing in every person with adhd.
"nothing i can do is right" WRONG!!!! you do some things wrong but you also do some things right!!!! quit discrediting yourself
now try acknowledging your failures:
cry about it first. let yourself sit in and feel your feelings first. you can continue after you finish crying about it
do some form of meditation that helps you clear out your mind. i suggest just 5 minutes or until you don't feel as heavy anymore
let yourself know that failing is an action and consequence, not a part of your identity. it is not you: you are someone who succeeds and fails sometimes. you can fail, but that does not mean everything you do will be a failure.
identify what kind of failure you're thinking about , why you feel so shitty about it, and what you should do for next time. it'd be good if you could write this down. here is an example from me:
failure: failing out of class
what happened: i failed bc i kept procrastinating and ended up sleeping in, so i could not submit on time
consequences of event: i had to retake the class, paid a significant amount of money, and now i cant graduate on time with my friends
why i feel shitty: i feel so left behind and stupid. i feel like this is such a stupid mistake that was easily avoidable.
and now i have so many thoughts in my mind right now, like "how can i be so stupid? how can i be so careless? this is such a stupid mistake."
now notice. if you also think like this, you are actively judging yourself. you are being so mean to yourself, and for what? would you ever told your friends they are so stupid and dumb for making careless mistakes? even if it's stupid, you wouldn't say it to their faces.
after identifying everything, confirm what actually happened, reframe your thoughts, and apologize to yourself:
"How can I be so careless?" -> It's not intentional, and I did try my best to work on it. It's not my fault my executive dysfunction took over the better part of me.
"How can I be so stupid?" -> Just because I cannot initiate tasks as well as the others, it doesn't mean i'm stupid. i am pretty good at other things, i cannot expect myself to be good at everything.
"This is such a stupid mistake." -> It is stupid, and that's... okay. It's fine. I accept it, I'll work on how to make it better in the future.
when you combat negative thoughts, make sure you combat them not only with facts but also with empathy and future action-focused thoughts.
the key is to focus on what you can do now, not what you should have done.
because focusing on the past is very very unhelpful.
now please focus on what you can do now:
Make small goals for the future.
What you should not say:
"I promise I will try harder to focus" -> Nope, you are relying on your ADHD symptom to not be ADHD anymore... which is impossible.
"I promise I won't forget next time" -> Same thing.
"I promise I will make a routine that I will stick to" -> This is too idealist, don't commit to anything for a long run, it's just setting yourself up for more failure.
What you should say instead:
"Next time, I will try to write it down so I won't forget next time" -> Tell yourself the clear steps on what you need to do. You cannot rely on your brain to just be better, come up with actions that can support you!
"Next time, I will set more alarms and ask a friend to remind me. In fact, I will do it now" -> Commit to things you can do immediately! The faster, the better so you won't lose this momentum. Stop thinking that your future self is 100% reliable. Always assume you need to do it as soon as possible to help yourself in the future.
"Next time, I will try out this routine and see if it works or not" -> Experiment with routines. Routines don't last long, so don't give youreelf empty promises. Instead, accept that your routine will chance every once in a while so you need to learn what works or not.
Apologize and forgive yourself
Say sorry to yourself.
It's normal to make mistakes, and it's unrealistic to think you won't make more.
Move on
Seriously. Don't sit on it too much.
Once you know what you need to do to not fail in the future and you have written it down... just let it go.
You don't need to feel bad to grow. You don't need to feel bad to be better.
You are allowed to feel good about yourself.
In fact, you should feel better about yourself now because you are showing your commitment to getting better by reading this long ass post.
Pat yourself in the back.
Failure has its consequences already, you don't need to punish yourself more. Please get something nice.
Failing is EXHAUSTING. Please give yourself a snack or some gaming time.
Allow yourself to breathe.
We are humans, we are not failures. We succeed and fail sometimes, not all the time.
Be nice to yourself, you have been through a lot.
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hawkinsquarry · 2 years ago
Note
❝  please don’t go—  i need.  i need someone—  i need you.  ❞ and ❝  it doesn’t have to mean anything,  i just don’t wanna feel lonely tonight. and i want to feel good for once.  ❞ is making me feel things. honestly needy steve begging to not be lonely sounds lovely but either way ❤️
how could i say goodbye? - steve x gn!reader
no pronouns for reader used; fluff, angst; hurt/comfort; sharing a bed; friends to lovers; love confessions; steve cry :(; brief mention of p*rn section at fam video but nothing in depth!
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You’ve seen Steve like this before. Beaten up, bruised, a bit bloody. You’ve seen him wear the scars after. Borrowing Robin’s concealer for a cut lip and making up lies about being a klutz. You’ve bandaged him up, grabbed an ice pack and a handful of ibuprofen and sat them down on his bedside table, taking in his sleeping face before shutting off the light and going home.
This time, he’s scared. Everyone is. The world’s up in smoke and fire and tens of people are missing or dead. You’d wrung your hands the entire walk to Steve’s at 2 am, just as big military vehicles are pulling in. You couldn’t sleep, not knowing what’s become of him, and you’re relieved when his big, dumb house is in view, intact. A warm light on in his bedroom window. His car in the driveway, his dad’s car not.
Steve’s terrified when he opens the door, but his features soften immediately. His shirt’s off. You notice the lacerations on his torso immediately, but Steve’s pulling you in and locking the door before you can ask.
“Did you walk here?” is the first thing he says. You shrug, and he sighs loudly before wrapping you up in his arms. He smells like earth. “I’m sorry I didn’t call.”
“Lines are down anyway,” you mumble into his shoulder, trying not to kiss the skin as much as you want to. “What happened?”
He sighs again. “Not an earthquake.”
“I know.”
“Guess you could tell I needed a nurse, huh?”
You don’t think it’s very funny, but you lead him to the bathroom, picking out the first aid kit you’d last restocked in July. “Think you’ll need to lay down,” you say, gently kicking the cabinet under the sink shut. “Bedroom.”
You work gently and diligently on his stomach. He’d sworn to you it was already disinfected by the same people who partially cleaned him up after Starcourt. You still apply alcohol, much to his dismay. But even when he’s wincing, he’s quiet. Steve’s not known to be quiet. Your anxiety nearly gets the best of you, almost screaming at him when you ask again, “What happened?”
He stares at you for a long time, brown eyes starting to wet. “Not tonight,” he says.
“Robin?”
“She’s alive, too. Almost -“ and he takes a deep breath, pauses when you dab some more isopropyl on his spent skin. “Eddie.” It’s all he says. You bite at your cheek. You didn’t know Eddie well, and you’ve still got a lot of questions - but it’s a confirmation that those you know who usually get into these kinds of messes are okay.
You’re not unaware of the pointed use of the word alive and not okay. He was okay after 1984, and okay again after 1985, but 1986 only brings the word alive.
You use gauze to wrap the cuts on his stomach before taking another once over of him. He’s still so beautiful, even caked with mud and dirt and some weird thick gross slime that he’d only moaned a little don’t ask about. “Your neck,” you whisper, brows furrowing.
He nods a bit. “Hurts.”
You disinfect it, too, gently dabbing him with a cotton pad. “Hurts to swallow? To talk?”
“Mhm.”
“That’s okay,” you soothe, “I’ll stop askin’ questions now.”
“Don’t,” he whispers, suddenly grabbing your wrist. “Keep talking. Please.”
You swallow and nod before continuing your work. “My house is fine. It looks most bad in downtown - I guess you already know that? The phone lines - I said that already. Guess what I did today?”
A hint of a smile. He shrugs a shoulder.
“I finally checked out the porn section at Family Video.”
His smile grows.
“Which I guess was really good timing. But Keith was there - something about how his employees didn’t show up? Do you know anything about that?”
“Nothing,” he mouths.
“I didn’t rent anything,” you continue, “I just wanted to look. And I guess - I guess I just wanted to see you, too.”
His big eyes get all soft again. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry.” You dab away the last remnants of blood from his neck and pull back to throw the cotton pad in the trash. “Shouldn’t apologize for saving the world.”
You’re prepping a band aid for a cut on his head when he whispers, “We didn’t this time.”
You look back at him in a little bit of shock. Yes, the things always come back. But he’s never come back and said “yeah, we really dropped the ball this time.” He’s always been relatively confident, giving it “an eighty to eighty-five percent chance” that this was the last time.
“Zero percent,” he says, like he’s reading your mind. “We didn’t.”
“Let’s worry about that tomorrow, okay? I saw those big government vehicles - they’ll help.”
He makes a face that tells you everything. They won’t. They don’t know how.
“I’m sorry,” you say, leaning back towards him and resting your hands on his chest.
You see his adam’s apple bob. “I’m sorry I couldn’t make it safe for you.”
Steve has never cried before in front of you. He’s gotten close, but just walked away, pinching his nose and coming back a few minutes later like nothing ever happened. But now, he’s crying. It’s soft, a few tears riding down his cheeks.
“Steve.” Your voice cracks. “None of this is your fault. None of it. You can’t save the world. I’m - I’m so happy you’re safe.” You press your tongue to the roof of your mouth, trying to fight off a sob. “I’m just glad you came home.”
He closes his eyes and bites his lip. You move away with your kit, placing it on his desk before moving back to him. You push his hair out of his face softly. “Get some sleep. Okay?”
Steve’s eyes shoot open and he looks scared again. Panicked. He shakes his head and grabs your hands, pulling you into him so far that you almost trip and fall on top of him. “Please don’t go. I need - I need someone. I need you.”
Your heart jumps up to your throat and you swallow thickly. He’s never asked you for this before. And he’s genuine - his eyes are wild and still wet and he looks so, so scared. Scared of losing you.
“Okay,” you whisper. “I’ll get some blankets and -“
“Here,” he says, tugging you in again. “I - look, I know. But it doesn’t have to mean anything. I just don’t wanna feel lonely tonight. I want to feel good for once. I - goddammit. I want you. Please.”
I want you. It rings in your head. I want you.
You move to the other side of the bed and slide under the covers, cuddling up close to him. Steve turns onto his side as best as he can - you’d chosen his good side to lay beside. You wrap him in your arms as he rests his head on your chest. His grip on you is tight and it has to hurt. His muscles have to be screaming at him to stop and rest. But he holds you like you might get taken, too, along with all the others.
And he cries. You feel the tears soaking through your shirt. He tries his best not to make any noise, but he still sniffles and clears his throat. You rake your hand through his hair and hold him as tight as you can, too.
“Steve,” you whisper. “I love you. I just - I had to say it.”
There’s a pause, a shaky breath, before he pushes himself up to kiss you. It’s small and otherwise insignificant, but warm and sweet and what you’ve wanted for years. You’re surprised when he pulls back, but you melt as he whispers, “I love you, too.”
He settles into your chest again, and you resume combing his hair, heart pounding. “I’m here. Okay? I’ll take care of you. Just rest. I love you.”
He sighs and relaxes. “I love you, too.”
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whumpsoda · 1 year ago
Text
Fixed part 2
Fixed Part 1 Fixed Part 3  A lot of people liked the first one so I really wanted to continue it a bit!!!
———————————————————————
Villain was at his house.
Villain, his sworn enemy, was in Hero’s house. 
What was worse, was the fact that he appeared ecstatic to be there. Villain was in a kneeling position, the same he had been in at Superhero’s home, a wide smile plastered across his face. He peered eagerly at Hero.
Villain had only gotten on two feet once Hero had rushed out of Superhero’s home, desperate to escape, and It had been evident from the look of awe on Villains face that he wasn’t let outside much, if at all. His sickly pale skin was a telltale sign of that fact.
The entire car ride was silent, Hero fixated on his thoughts, and Villain with his cheek pressed to the window.
Hero now leaned against the cluttered countertop, trying to gather his thoughts. Villain sat right at his feet, eyes piercing into him, which did not help. 
“Sir?” Hero stiffened.
“Yeah, man?” Hero kept his eyes fixed on the wall.
“What are, um, what work do you require of me?” 
In confusion, Hero shifted his gaze to the other man. “Work?” He questioned.
“Yes, sir,” Villain maintained a genuine smile. “Work. That’s what I’m trained for, helping you! Superhero sir helped me so much, so I can help you now.” 
“Oh, uh, no Villain, I’m not like Superhero, I promise.” Hero crouched down, placing a gentle hand to Villain’s shoulder. “You’re okay now. You’re not with him anymore, he can’t hurt you, ‘kay? You don’t need to pretend anymore.”
Unlike Hero expected, Villain did not relax, nor did he begin acting like Villain. Instead, his brows furrowed, and his face fell to a state of confusion and worry. “I- sir, I’m not pretending, I promise! I really, really wanna serve you, please!” Villain was practically begging, his strained smile sending shivers down Hero’s spine.
Hero sighed, slipping his hands over his face. He stood up again, leaning his back against the counter. “Look, I know… you’ve gone through something, shitty, but it’s all fine now! I’m letting you go, Villain. So you can be evil and stuff again, okay?” His eyes met with Villains, and the look of terror on Villain’s face did nothing to ease his nerves. 
“Y’know, I think I’m just gonna call Assistant, your friend, y’know? Maybe she can help you-”
“No! No, sir, no!” Villain was yelling, his weak hands frantically clinging to Hero’s ankles. He pressed his forehead to the cold tile floor. “Please, I’m a good boy, I promise! I’m not evil anymore, an’ I’m not bad! I promise sir, I wanna be a good boy for you, please!”
Hero stared down, mouth agape and wideyed. 
“Please don’t send me back, with- with the villains. I’m not evil anymore, Superhero helped me! I’m made to serve you now, sir, I can’t go back. This is my purpose.”
Hero stared back, slack jawed, as Villain gazed up with pleading eyes. For a moment, neither made a sound.
“Villain, let's get you to bed.” Hero pushed his weight back onto his feet, standing up straight. Hero leaned down slightly, stretching out an open hand to his nemesis.
“But- sir- what about work?” 
“No work, Villain. It’s ten at night, and you look exhausted. I need you to sleep.”
“So I can work super hard tomorrow?” The words made Hero stiffen.
“Yeah, dude, whatever. Just… go to bed now, ‘kay?” Villain timidly curled his fingers over hero's, pulling himself onto shaky legs.
The two carefully made their way to Hero’s bedroom, which was not exactly what one would call clean. Clothes, papers, and unrecognizable items littered the floor, making it increasingly hard for the two to navigate the room without stepping on anything. When they made their way to the at least nice looking bed, Hero gestured to it.
“You… want me to sleep in a bed? In you’re bed?” Villain hung his head low, greasy strands of hair falling in front of his eyes.
“Yeah, sorry, I guess I need to order a bed for you tonight.” Hero chuckled slightly.
“I, um, I sleep on the floor sir.” 
“Villain. Bed, now please.” Upon the command, Villain carefully stepped to the bed, next to Hero, and fixed his eyes on the pristine sheets. He knew it would be so wrong. He should be cleaning, not sleeping, let alone in Hero’s bed.
Hero pressed a tender hand to Villain’s back, steadily shifting him onto the mattress. Villain sat down rigidly, his hands folded tightly in his lap.
“C’mon, lie down.” Hero coaxed. Begrudgingly, Villain placed his back against the blankets under him. Hero leaned to the floor, grabbing a large, fluffy blanket and placing it over Villain’s body. It enveloped his small frame, making it so he was almost completely unnoticeable underneath.
The warmth and comfortability of the blanket felt foreign to him. Drowsiness began to seep into his brain, taking a hold on him. As much as he needed to fight it, part of him didn’t want to. Hero was rubbing his shoulder, sweet, circular motions. “Just sleep now. I have to leave for a bit, but I’ll be back as soon as I can. Goodnight Villain.”
Hero received only a tired hum of recognition in response. As he walked out of the dark room, he watched as Villain snuggled deeper into the soft bed.
Hero held his fist to the door, hesitantly knocking his knuckles against it. He had no idea if anyone would answer. He wouldn’t have blamed them if they didn’t. They definitely didn’t know that he knew where they lived, and they definitely would not take kindly to that fact.
Especially since he not only knew where they lived, but he showed up to their place of residence. In the middle of the night. Unannounced.
Yet, moments later, the door opened, but only a sliver. “What are you doing here?” Hero felt his throat run momentarily dry.
“I-I need your help.”
“And why the hell would that be? I’m not coming out so you and your Hero friends can capture me, just like Villain.” A strike of guilt struck through the hero's body. 
“I’m not going to arrest you.”
“Then there's no reason for you to be here, and I’m sure there's no possible reason you could ever need my help. So leave.” Hero watched as they went to shut the door.
“It’s about Villain!” The door opened a smidge more, allowing a faint outline of the figure to become visible.
“What?” Hero swallowed.
“I need your help. For Villain.”
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massivedrickhead · 8 days ago
Text
Pitch Perfect SpookFest Day 2 - R is for Run
Words: 3282
Summary: Chloe goes out for a run, but soon wishes she’d stayed in bed.
Notes: A vague summary, but I’m honestly not sure how to summarise this one other than a run from hell. I started running this year, and I came up with this fic while on one of my first 5K outdoor runs. 
A million apologies because obviously I’m several days late on this one. I’d hoped to have it done by Saturday but I was nowhere close, and both Saturday and Sunday turned out to be pretty busy days.
Trigger warnings may contain spoilers so if you want to avoid those, skip past them.
Trigger warnings: Themes of depression and suicide
Read on AO3
@pitch-perfect-spookfest
-
“It’s Sunday,” Beca groaned, rolling over in bed at the sound of Chloe’s alarm. She grabbed her phone from the nightstand, one eye closed against the sudden bright light. “It’s 7 am, you animal.”
“I’m just going for a run,” Chloe replied, quickly silencing her alarm and getting out of bed. “Go back to sleep.”
Chloe whipped off her pyjama top and began pulling on her gym clothes. Beca blinked a few times and propped herself up on her elbows. 
Chloe rolled her eyes and smirked. “Go back to sleep,” she repeated. “I won’t be out long.”
“You went for a run yesterday,” Beca replied. “I thought you were meant to take breaks?”
“It’s fine, it’s not like I’m running a marathon or something. I’ll just do 5K.”
“She says like it’s nothing,” Beca said, shaking her head. “You said your ankle was hurting.”
“I didn’t,” Chloe replied, pulling her hair into a tight bun. 
“You said it felt spongy,” Beca countered, cringing at the thought. 
“I mean…” Chloe tilted her head and lifted up her leg, rotating her foot. “It feels a little weird, but it doesn’t hurt.”
“Don’t you think that’s maybe a sign you should have a day off? If you wanna work out so bad, I can think of something for us to do.”
Chloe laughed. “And who says I can’t do both?” she said. “You aren’t going to talk me out of this, so are you gonna go back to sleep?”
“That depends, are you gonna stretch before you go?”
“I always do,” Chloe said. 
“I think I can stay up for a little longer,” Beca replied, settling back into bed. “Wouldn’t want to miss the show.”
“You’re a dork.”
“Uh huh. Less talky, more stretchy.”
Chloe disappeared into the bathroom once her stretches were done, and Beca began dozing again almost immediately. 
She was woken up by the feeling of Chloe pressing a soft kiss to her cheek.
“I’ll be back soon,” she said. 
Beca caught hold of her wrist and pulled her back for a kiss on the lips. 
“Is everything okay with you?” Beca asked. “Like, really okay?”
“Yes,” Chloe replied. “Getting outside and exercising is all part of the plan. It’s good for me, it helps clear my head.”
“I know,” Beca said. “And I’m glad you have something to help you do that now, I just…” she trailed off, her brain still half asleep. “You’ve been running like every day this week. I’m worried about you, that’s all.”
“You don’t need to worry,” Chloe replied. “I’m fine.”
“And you’d tell me if things got bad again?” 
“Of course,” Chloe said. She kissed Beca again. “I love you.”
“Love you too,” Beca said, finally releasing Chloe’s wrist and sinking back into her pillows.
-
After a five minute warm up walk, Chloe’s pace picked up and she started running. 
When she had left the house, it had been the perfect October morning for a run. Clear skies, bright sun, and a crispness to the air that Chloe knew would become welcome as soon she started running.
But by the time the walk had ended, the clear skies had been replaced by grey, and a mist had started rolling in off the sea. 
Chloe didn’t mind though. She’d never run in fog before, and liked the idea of doing something new today. 
They hadn’t lived in this little seaside town long, but Chloe had already established a 5K route. It started in the park and then continued down a stretch of path covered either side by trees and grass. At the end of the path was a road that, once crossed, would lead her to a promenade along the seafront. From there was the pier - which she ran up and then down - and then it was onto the more uneven sand-covered tracks which led all the way to the beginnings of the cliffs. The sea on one side, and the grass-topped dunes on the other. From there it was back to the sidewalk and a straight run home. 
The playlist Beca had curated for her was a perfect mix of musicals and pop to help keep her tempo up, and at this moment Chappell Roan was singing Red Wine Supernova over the sound of the waves crashing in the distance.
Chloe wasn’t sure if she’d ever felt better. 
She knew Beca was worried, but Beca didn’t need to be worried. 
Chloe was better now. She was good. She was outside and exercising and that darkness that had begun consuming her in New York was gone. 
She didn’t even think about it anymore. 
The path took a sharp right and Chloe followed it down the hill and beneath the canopy of trees. 
The leaves had begun falling in the last few weeks, and the normally clear path was now almost completely covered in hues of orange, yellow, and green. Beneath her feet, the leaves were slick and slimy, almost pounded flat against the path, like they had been painted on. She slowed her pace, careful not to slip, and followed the path down and around until she reached and crossed the road. 
The move to this town had been Beca’s idea.
“Are you an old timey doctor sending me off to convalesce by the sea?”
“Yes,” Beca said. “You have a case of the melancholies so we need the sea air to blast it out. I was thinking of getting some leeches too, since you have sad blood.”
“You’re a dork.”
Beca had suggested this place because it was quiet and calm, and no one was likely to know or care who Beca was. 
She had blamed herself and her overnight rise to fame for the resurgence in Chloe’s anxiety and depression. 
Chloe hadn’t agreed - this had been something she’d dealt with since she was a young teen after all - but she couldn’t deny that the sudden appearance of paparazzi everywhere they went, and seeing her wife’s name plastered over every gossipy news site, had made it worse. 
The final straw had been an article Chloe had seen written about herself, with a picture of her and Aubrey holding hands outside a bar. The headline implied cheating, and her social media had been flooded with hate messages only hours after it had been posted. Chloe had been told to kill herself no less than 52 times. 
She had counted.
Like tally-marks in a column, she had counted.
“Beca, I swear I didn’t-”
“Please don’t finish that sentence. Jesus, you do not need to justify holding your best friend’s hand to me.”
The wind had picked up slightly by the time she had hit the promenade, and Chloe was grateful for it. 
It slowed her pace, made her work harder, and cleared out any spiralling thoughts she might have hypothetically been dwelling on.  
She smiled at an old man walking his dog, and gave a nod to the runner coming in the opposite direction. 
She was good.
She was feeling good.
She increased her pace again, and felt the ache in her legs.
Good.
This was good. 
She had gotten into running in college but had fallen out of the habit in the years they’d lived in New York.
At a suggestion from her therapist she’d started up again in this new town, and the bug had quickly taken hold.
The fog was thicker now, and she couldn’t quite judge how far along the promenade she was, but she knew she was approaching her favourite part of the run.
The pier.
It was a mile long stone structure, and at the very end was a lighthouse. One side had a wall that came up to Chloe’s hips, and the other was completely open. It was wide enough for four people to walk comfortably side-by-side, but there was still the thrill of danger that, with one wrong foot too close to the edge, you could slip off and into the sea below. 
There was a moment when running along it that Chloe looked forward to every time. When the beaches on either side would fall away into the sea, and there would be nothing but open ocean around her. 
Chloe loved it. It felt like the whole world dropped away from her leaving nothing but the pier beneath her feet and the infinite ocean stretching out all around her. 
It was addictive, this feeling of breaking free and escaping. 
Today it would be different, she knew. The fog - which had steadily gotten thicker - made it impossible to see the pier stretching out ahead of her, and the ocean either side was completely hidden too. 
Never mind, she thought. I can do it again tomorrow. 
She took a sharp left and began the run up the pier. 
It was a strange feeling, running in the fog. Chloe likened it to running on a treadmill. There was no sense that she was making progress. No idea how far she had come or how far she had left to go. It was like running in a dream. In a void. 
The fog closed around her and, without the usual warning tone that let her know her earphones had died, her music stopped. 
“Shit,” Chloe muttered aloud. 
She was sure she’d charged her earphones the night before. She was sure she’d checked them that morning. 
She didn’t want to stop running to investigate, so she decided to just endure the rest of the run in silence, or as silent as it could be being so close to the sea. 
It was then that, without the music to drown it out, Chloe realised that she couldn’t actually hear the sea. 
She had done this walk with Beca a number of times, and you could always hear the sea. It crashed against the rocks at the base of the pier, and was often louder than their conversations. 
Chloe couldn’t hear any seagulls either, which was also strange. Chloe couldn’t remember the last time she hadn’t heard one squawking.
Then Chloe realised she couldn’t hear anything at all.
Not the sea. Not the birds. Not the occasional bark of a dog, or a parent calling to their child. Nothing. 
It’s early on a Sunday morning, Chloe reasoned with herself. Everyone is probably still in bed. 
Even the birds? Came another voice in Chloe’s head. 
Chloe shook her head, and kept up her pace. 
Her ankle had started feeling weird again, and there was a slight twinge in the side of her knee. 
Maybe Beca was right. Maybe I’m pushing too hard and I need to take a break. 
There was a sharp pain in her back. An old injury she had sustained building IKEA furniture when she and Beca had first moved to New York all those years ago. She aggravated it sometimes by sleeping in a weird position, or spending too long sitting in one spot, and now it seems she’d done it by running. 
Annoyed with herself, and with how the run was turning out in general, Chloe decided that once she got off the pier, she would keep running forward, instead of left and down towards the cliff. She would cut the run off early. Go home and take a shower and then crawl back into bed with Beca. 
She judged she had maybe another few minutes left before the pier would end and she’d run around the lighthouse and then back the way she came. 
She kept running, the only sound coming from her feet hitting the ground. 
She waited to see the lighthouse loom into view. 
She’d expected to see flashes from it long before now. It should have been on, warning the ships of the rocks and shore ahead. 
But there was nothing. 
Just the endless grey of the fog. 
Assuming her pace had been much slower than she’d thought, Chloe checked her watch. 
She didn’t like doing this in a run, because it made her too aware of her speed, her form, and how long she had left to go. She liked to just run and then check out her stats when she got home. 
Now, however, she wanted to know how fast she was running. How long she’d been on this pier. 
But her watch didn’t show that. 
It didn’t show anything, not even the time. 
The screen was a jumble of shapes and colours, as if she was trying to read the time in a dream. 
Great, first my earphones and now this. 
With the intention of pulling out her phone from her running belt, Chloe slowed to a walk and then eventually a stop. 
The fog closed in around her, and suddenly Chloe felt white hot pain. 
It was everywhere, all over her body, and it startled Chloe so much she let out a scream. 
The only feeling she could relate the pain to was when she’d once ran along the beach on a windy day, and had been blasted by sand that had been picked up by the wind. Except now the sand felt closer to glass. 
Chloe looked at her arm and saw pinpricks of blood begin to bloom on her skin. 
Run, an urgent voice in her head said. Run! 
She turned on her heel and started running again, back in the direction of home, and the pain on her skin eased. 
What the fuck is happening?
-
There was no way to know how long she’d been running, but it was long enough to know she should have been home a long time ago yet here she was still on the pier.
She didn’t dare slow down but she knew this pace wasn’t sustainable for much longer. Every part of her was aching, and her exposed arms were covered in a coating of dried blood and tiny cuts.
Blood had begun blossoming through the toes of her white running sneakers, and her heels felt like they had been rubbed down to the bone.
Surely she would reach the end of the pier soon.
Her breathing was laboured and there was a painful stitch in her side. Tears had been falling steadily down her cheeks for what felt like the last hour.
She didn’t know what to do. Didn’t know how to get home.
She wished she’d stayed in bed that morning.
Was Beca worriedly pacing their home right now?
Was she out looking for her? Calling her name into the fog?
Chloe felt a jolt of fear at the thought of her wandering out onto the pier and getting trapped just like Chloe had.
She tried to pick up her pace - to force her legs to move faster - but her body simply refused to cooperate. She had no energy left to spend.
Her left foot hit the ground and then her ankle rolled.
She hit the ground hard.
Elbows and knees hit first, the impact reverberating through her arms and legs. Beneath her leggings, the skin on her knees tore. Her chin scraped against sandy concrete.
And the fog closed in to rip up the rest of her skin.
This is how I go, she thought. A literal death by a thousand cuts.
She curled herself into a ball, eyes squeezed shut to protect them, and she thought of Beca.
Thought of how she’d looked that morning, half-asleep yet still beautiful. A crease of worry between her eyebrows that had been there for a long time now.
Ever since that night.
The night that prompted Beca’s sudden hiatus from work and eventually their move.
Chloe remembered the whirr of Beca’s printer that she had borrowed for the occasion as she printed off all 52 comments telling her to kill herself.
She read them through again, organised them in a neat pile, and placed them under the note she’d written her wife.
Chloe remembered pills. The smear of her blood against the side of their bathtub.
The sound Beca made that she wished would get out of her head.
Maybe I died that night, Chloe thought, as the tiny shards of glass reopened the barely healed scars on her arms. Maybe this is hell.
She tried to move, tried to stretch out her arm to push herself back to her knees, but it was difficult. Her hand slipped against the sand beneath it - a new graze to add to the collection - and she fell again. She stretched her arm out to try again, but felt open space where the ground should have been.
I must be near the edge.
It dawned on her that this was her way out. A faster end than being sliced up by a million shards of glass. 
Who knew how long that would take?
All she needed to do was roll to her right, and she would crash against the rocks at the base of the pier.
If that didn’t finish her off, the sea definitely would.
She felt… disappointed.
She really had wanted to get better.
She didn’t want to hurt Beca like this. Not again.
No, there had to be another way.
It would be easier to stop.
No.
Just one more roll and you’ll be free.
No.
No more pain. No more guilt. You’re allowed to stop fighting when it gets this hard.
“No!”
Chloe yelled the word until her voice was hoarse. The fog filled her mouth and cut into her tongue and throat but she didn’t stop yelling.
She spat out a mouthful of blood.
She had fought hard to get here and she wasn’t giving up now. 
If the sea was to her right, that must mean the wall was to her left. 
Maybe there were two ways off this pier, and she didn’t have to choose the way that ended her life.
Instead of rolling right, she rolled left. Again and again and again until she hit the 2 foot wall. 
She kept her eyes closed as she began pulling herself up the wall.
Her hands gripped the top, and she pulled herself into a standing position. She knew she must be leaving bloody smears against the stones. Once upright, she tried to lift a shaking leg over the wall, but it wouldn’t go high enough.  
She moved her hands until they were gripping the other edge of the wall and she pulled herself over, not caring she was about to drop head first into sand and rocks and tufts of razor sharp grass.
Her music came back on in a deafening blast as Chloe hit the ground on the other side of the wall.
One earphone was gone, and through that ear she could hear the sea and birds and sounds of life.
She started to cry.
Tears ran down her cheeks and mingled with the hundreds of tiny cuts on her face.
The pain was blinding, but she didn’t care.
She didn’t care because she was alive.
Chloe opened her eyes and saw the fog was gone. Her body was awash with dried and fresh blood and the cuts stung in the cold October wind.
She lifted her arm to check the time.
The screen of her watch was cracked, but she could see it was only 7:35 am.
She started to laugh but it quickly turned back into a sob.
She pulled herself up on shaky legs and began a slow walk back home.
Beca was in the kitchen when she got back.
“Oh hey, you’re back earl- Oh my god!”
The mug she was holding hit the ground and shattered, but Beca didn’t even notice because she was already hurrying towards her wife.
When Chloe spoke, her voice was rough as sandpaper.
“Bec, I don’t think I’m okay after all. I think I need some help.”
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igotbloodonmyhands · 8 months ago
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Nightmares / Part I
Note: I made this two parts since I really wanted to post this but couldn't find the energy to write for the others tonight. Tomorrow you'll get Price, Rudi and Soap tho (I used alphabetical order, that's why they're last). Trope: Fluff, angst, hurt comfort Word count: 1.303 Trigger warning: Mention of torture
Alejandro: Alejandro was no stranger to sleepless nights. It took an eternity for him to fall asleep, worries and sorrows keeping him awake. When he did finally fall asleep, the nightmares came. He'd stand in the town square of Las Almas, having to watch as his family, friends and comrades were put against a wall. He couldn't run or scream, just stand there. When he suddenly stared in the barrel of a gun he finally woke up, shirt wet with sweat, the rooms silence filled by his heavy breaths. "Joder (Fuck)", he mumbled, getting up and putting on a new shirt. It was 0200 (2 am). He decided to get a tea. As he stepped in the community room he was surprised to see the lights on, you standing in pyjamas in front of the boiling kettle, a mug in your hand. "(Name)? What are you doing in the kitchen an two in the morning, tesoro?" You turned around, grinning but tired. "I could ask you the same, Ale" He sighed and grabbed a mug and tea bag (Spanish orange) "Can't sleep. You?" "Same. Do you... Wanna talk about it?", he shook his head. "Not right now, I think.... Just need to think about something else" You shrugged. "Understandable" You two sat down on the couch, sitting in silence, drinking the tea, each lost in their own thoughts. "Would you rather fight one hundred duck sized horses or one horse sized duck?", you suddenly asked. He looked at you like you had grown two horns. "Ehhh, madre mia, the horses, I think?", he answered. "Me too. Even though it would depend on the horse" He chuckled. "Are you trying to distract me?" You grinned "Is it working?" He rolled his eyes "A bit". You leaned you head on his shoulder, and after a moment he put his head on yours. "Good" You continued to banter about random nonsense until, finally, fatigue overcame you and you finally fell asleep. It was the best sleep either of you had gotten in a while.
Gaz: Falling asleep wasn't the problem. But as soon as Gaz drifted off into dream land, he was haunted. Faces of fallen comrades screamed at him for not saving them, the screams of agony of their last moments, the pleas of enemies he tortured filled his mind. With a muffled yelp he shot up in his bed, chest heaving. "Fuck", he muttered, getting up and pacing up and down in his room. His heart was beating like a racehorse. He grabbed his gym bag and decided to head to the training rooms. He was surprised to see the lights on, the thudding of fists hitting the punching bag filling the room. "Not bad, (name)", he stepped closer, looking at you. You sighed. "Can't sleep either?", you asked. He nodded. "Yea. Damn nightmares", he punched the bag, making it swing violently. You stepped back, sitting down on the mat and leaning against the wall. "Wanna talk about it?". He thought for a moment before turning his attention back on the bag. You thought he'd just ignore you and stay quiet, but as he started punching the bag, he muttered under his breath. "I couldn't save them. I killed them" His punches got harder and more aggressive. "It's my fault. It's my fault". You weren't sure who he was talking about, but it didn't quite matter right now. "Hey, hey, Gaz", you tried to calm him down. "Cmere", you patted the mat next to you. He seemed to contemplate for a moment, but then finally sat down next to you. A shuddered breath escaped him as he slumped in on himself. You opened your mouth, but quite honestly you weren't sure what to say. So you just sat in silence, but it wasn't an awkward feeling. It felt... Safe. Suddenly, you felt his head on your shoulder, and smiled, leaning yours against his.
Ghost: For Ghost, a good nights sleep was as common as a unicorn. Everytime he closed his eyes, he was there again. Buried alive, in a coffin, squished next to a decaying body. But this time, he didn't get out. He thrashed and screamed, unbeknownst to him not only in his sleep, but it was no use. He was trapped, he was trapped, he was trapped. Panic flooded his every fiber, but he just wouldn't fucking wake up. His eyes widened when he finally woke up. His breath came in short, shuddering gasps, tears staining his cheeks. He wanted to run, he needed to run or else he'd suffocate. He almost fell over putting on his pants and running shoes before he ripped open his door and ran. He didn't know where, he just needed to run. The sky was still dark, with the faintest shimmer of violet light creeping up the horizon. He aimed for the woods behind the barracks, mindlessly running along the paths. "Fuck, Riley, watch your step, big boy", a sudden voice squeaked. He opened his eyes which he didn't remember closing. He looked down, seeing you knocked over on the ground. "Sorry", he mumbled, giving you a hand and pulling you up. "What are you doing here at this time of night?", you raised an eyebrow. He shifted his weight. "Can't sleep". "Me too...", you looked at him. His gaze was weird... Dead, somehow. "Do you... Want to talk about it?", you asked carefully. "No", he said, voice firm. "Come with me", you grabbed his arm, leading him to a bench nearby, guiding him down and plopping next to him. "I'm here for you, you know that, right?" He gulped. "Yea..." A deep sigh escaped him. "...Thank you". You smiled, leaning your head on his shoulder. "No problem", you mumbled, feeling him relaxing under you.
Horangi: They were here, they'd kill him, fuck, he needed to hide, he needed to hide. Horangi panted, clenching his fist in the sheets. His eyes opened wide and he rubbed the scars on his face. He grabbed a pack of cigarettes and stepped outside, sliding down the wall. He lit it and took a deep breath, letting his head roll back and closing his eyes. "Whatcha doin there?", you voice suddenly sound beside him. "빌어먹을!" (Fucking hell, may be a bit wrong since I don't speak Korean) He had jumped up, sighing when he saw it was just you. "Stop sneaking up to me like that, (name)". You chuckled. "Heh, sorry". You sat down next to him. "Can't sleep?", you looked up at him. He nodded. "I don't wanna talk about it". "Then lets just... Sit" You leaned against him, feeling the tension melt slightly from his form.
König: As soon as he closed his eyes, the memories came. He was strapped to a chair, only dressed in boxer shorts, his hood gone. He felt exposed. They whipped, beat and cut him, the scars still evident on his skin. He stood up on shaky legs, the scars on his body aching. A small tin of ointment stood on the table, which he grabbed and carefully rubbed it in. He was not gonna fall asleep anytime soon again. With a heavy sigh he put on his clothes and shuffled towards the armoury. He plopped down on a bench and started cleaning his guns. "Hey there", he hadn't heard you, and immediately pointed the empty gun at you. "Scheiße! You scared me!", he mumbled. You giggled, sitting down next to him. "Sorry". He rolled his eyes and watched him clean his weapons for a minute. "Can't sleep?", you asked. "Nightmares", he answered shortly. You leaned your head on his shoulder, feeling his muscles move under it as he wiped down the barrel of his gun. "You can always talk to me, you know?", you mumbled. "Yea... Danke"
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ricegobbler · 8 months ago
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TFP Ratchet x Fem!Reader who’s trying to make him sleep😴
Ok I’m actually busy today. So ima just leave this short post here for yall for the time being. I’ll try making the Part 2 of the TFP Cons x Fem!reader soon😢
Anyways, like I said take this food before I go☺️
Warnings: None!! Mainly just fluff.
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One night at base, Y/N was awake while everyone else recharged. Well, not everyone. Of course the “sunshine” was awake. He was just typing away on the computer, face covered in a green light. Y/N just sighed and watched him as he continued his work, not a word from him.
She honestly felt concerned for him, he’s always working and never recharges. She did leave him alone though, she didn’t wanna bother him.
Eventually, Y/N felt tired and ready to recharge. As she started walking to her quarters(or berth idk) she heard the medic yawn. She quickly turned her helmto look at him covering his mouth as he slowly turned his helm to look back at her.
“Ratchet..” You started, fully turning around to look at him and crossing your arms.
“Not a word.” He grumbled, going back to the computer.
You groaned and just walked behind him, quickly pulling his servo and grasping it into yours.
“You are going to recharge tonight, whether you like it or not.” You hissed, narrowing your optics at him.
“But my work! I must finish it! I need this!-“ He was then shushed by your finger which was literally up to his mouth. “And I need you to rest…you work too much..” you say softly. “Come now.” You then start to gently and slowly drag him to his quarters(or berth)
She then gently lays him down and sits next to him as he laid down and breathed softly. “Better?” You ask, “Mm..” he grumbled.
You just giggled and hummed a soft lullaby to help him sleep.
Good thing is it worked! But you were too tired to even move at this point. Before you could at least try getting up, Ratchet quickly took your wrist in his servo and pulled you into him. Cuddling and big spooning you while he slept peacefully.
You didn’t squirm nor surrender, and took it with no hesitation <33
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Kinda in a rush, sorry if it’s bad🙁
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nor-4 · 1 year ago
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For the first time.
I wanna cry so bad tumblr didn't post the part two this just because my net is slow n now i have to restart over again. I'm so disappointed, this will probably the bad version of pt 2. :(
Pairings - Mike Schmidt ft Mean!Reader.
After learning about the whole animatronics thing it weirded you out but yet you are curious, after seeing how they act it made you think that maybe they are just a child.
You headed home from the pizzeria, you just knew that you had a strong bond with abby. Everything that came out of you when it comes to abby is just normal.
As you were about to go to sleep you decided to snoop around the old box of your belongings when you were a kid, you found a crayons and a empty drawing book.
You love to draw when you were a kid so your mom used to spoil you with them, you wanted to give this to abby. Never in your life have you ever really cared for a child.
A whole 12 hours had just passed and it's your shift again, you were walking to work until vanessa saw you and gave you a ride since she is about to go to that old pizzeria anyways.
"Hi vanessa, hi (y/n)." Abby greeted as she started running on where the animatronics are, "Mike.." Vanessa said as you turned at her hearing her tone gives you heart attack you just knew that she is mad. "So you knew about the animatronics?" Mike asked as both of them started talking about the animatronics as you continued sweeping the place.
Suddenly abby asked for help and started making a plan about doing a really big fort for her and her friends, "Maybe we can use the table as a fort.." Vanessa said as an idea for the fort.
They started working on it same goes the animatronics helping as you are still cleaning after the fort was finished abby started calling you so she can lay down beside you.
Vanessa excused herself to go get a cloth because it's about to rain and we need a "roof" mike followed her to the stock room as i sighed staring at the ceiling.
Being left out like this makes you heart ache, you always hated this kind of feeling especially when you were a child.
"okay everyone. Now pick your partner for the project." Your teacher joyfully said as you were at the corner of the room watching your classmate scattered around looking for their partner, disclosing their hate with each other if needed just so they won't be partners with you.
You bite your lower lip thinking someone will ask you if you wanted to be their partner, but sadly you were placed on the room where students are on an odd number.
"Hey (y/n) you don't have a partner. Do you want to have a group project with the others." your teacher asking you if you want to push yourself over people who doesn't even want to be close to you, "No ma'am I'll just work by myself." You politely said through the loneliness you are feeling.
You hang your head low playing with your fingers holding back your tears as you feel their eyes burning into you as if you did something unforgivable.
"Hey (y/n) are you okay?" Abby asked concernly as she sat up to look at you, "I'm fine abby don't worry about it." you reassured abby with a smile.
"How about we go for a dance?" Abby asked as she stood up same goes the animatronics as the bear type of robot started singing as abby is dancing while holding your hands.
Abby stood up to the stage as you told her to be careful as you were distracted by hearing vanessa and mike fighting over something that you don't want to know. It's your first time again hearing someone fight so seeing it makes you feel like you wanna cry.
You grew up with an alcoholic father and a workaholic mother, they often yell to each other, destroying things and almost killing each other.
Everything happened so fast you heard vanessa yelling something as you felt something hot hit your face almost hitting your eyes, you ran on where abby was as you saw her laying down on the ground.
"Abbyy.." you said as you lightly shake her hands as a cough escaped her mouth from the smoke, "What happened?" abby asked as she stood up as you scoop her for a hug reassuring her that everything is an accident.
You guys packed up your things because vanessa had said that mike and abby needs to go home and get abby some rest. You are on the car with abby as she hugged you from your tears on hearing them yell outside, she doesn't understand what is happening at the moment as she just comforted you based on how you feel.
You wiped your tears as you feel mike had entered the car, "She looks angry.. Why does everyone look at you that way?" Abby asked on sight after seeing vanessa angry, you wanted to dissappear on sight but mike insisted that you shouldn't be out walking this late.
Drive home is quiet since abby had already fallen asleep and you are still a bit awkward around mike, you carried abby to her room as soon us you guys got home cause abby was clinging into you.
You set her down to her bed she looked at you as if she wanted to ask something but just let it go, "Goodnight (y/n)." abby said as she closed her eyes from her tiredness. "Goodnight abby.." you whispered as she was already asleep.
You are about to left the house since your home is just near here might as well just walk it, until you were stopped by mike who is sitting outside looking at the sky as if something miracle is about to happen.
"i didn't hear anything from you earlier.. Everything all right?" mike asked as you sat down beside him and was taken a back by his question, you never thought you'd have this kind of conversation with him it feels so cozy, comforting and peaceful.
"I'm gonna be honest with you.. I feel left out earlier." You said as you were playing with your fingers again, "I know, i wanted to help you but i couldn't.. It's vanessa." mike sighed as he stopped in the middle of the conversation.
He started talking about his brother and everything they went through he feels like vanessa is stopping him from finding out everything, he describes his trauma to you as if he had met you for a very very long time.
"And you know.. I really liked you, i thought i was just going crazy until i started thinking about you the most random times.." Mike said as he looked at you as you look at the moon as it lights up your beauty, "I liked you too mike, you are a very nice man. I thought i was just bored and then i started feeling something as if I'm jealous." You stated as you looked back at him.
He wanted to cherish this moment with you, if he had a three wishes from a genie he would wish two times to comeback to this moment and the third wish is he wanted to live every years he had with you.
"Since you had confirmed that i have a chance with you. (Y/n) will you go out with me, i know i won't be a perfect man for you but i will do my best. I promise i will never disappoint you (y/n) just plea-" You cut off mikes speech mid way with a kiss as you hold both of his hands. "stop it you dummy, yes i will go out with you." You said as you smiled at him while he looked like he is about to cry.
"(Y/n) i really love you. I will earn your reciprocation of my love." Mike said as he kissed both of your knuckles as you giggled on how loser he is being, "I know you will mike.." You laughed as he admire you gosh he is about to melt.
"Can you please stay just this once?" Mike pleaded as he wanted to cuddled you up and make everything up to you since you confesses that you feel left out earlier, "Yes mike.." You stood up as you brushed your pants.
"And it won't be once mikey." You told him as you pressed his nose with your point finger as both of you giggled like a high school lovers.
Mike guided you to his room as he pulled out a shirt and pajamas for you since he doesn't want you to sleep on a work shirt, unexpectedly you stripped infront of him as he closed his eyes as if he doesn't have any permission to see you.
"Mike stop being a coward, we are together now." you remarked as you put on the pajamas as you helped him get his vest off so he can change his shirt, he was still shy so he changed pretty fast which made you giggled.
You lay down on the right side as mike was on the other side, he cuddled up to you it's not like those tensed up cuddle this one is the comfortable one. Both of you have been longing for this a very long time ago plus both of you are tired so the sleep is very cozy for mike. Pretty much he sleeped through the night without taking a sleeping pill.
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chaotic-orphan · 1 year ago
Note
Hii! So I was wondering if you can do this Sick and Delirious Villain x Hero Story! If you do, there can be a part two. You don’t have to tho but this is what it’s about if you decide to do it. If you don’t wanna read all of it, there is a shortened version of both parts at the very bottom. (But you kind of have to read Villains past to understand)
TW: Panic attacks, SA, Vomit/Throwing up
Villain backstory: Villain had a terrible family. Their parents were neglectful and their brother was absolutely horrible. He would SA, torture (you can decide), and make Villain throw up. Sticking their fingers down their throat and then pulling out just in time to punching their stomach so hard and so many times that they throw up. And Villains parents stood there and did nothing. When Villain was able to leave, they were messed up in the head by the things their family did.
Part 1: Villain and Hero and secretly dating and Hero still doesn’t know how Villains past, and they never pushed. Villain was sick, a fever of 103 and delirious (preferably Hypoactive Delirium), and Hero was at work. Villain woke up from bed feeling really bad and ran to the bathroom to throw up. Seeing their past with throw up, they didn’t want to do it anymore and started crying and hyperventilating. Hero got home five minutes after and was on the phone with Superhero. They heard the villain throwing up and crying so they told Superhero they needed to go. Hero forgot to end the call and shoved the phone in their pocket.
Hero walked into the bathroom and saw a vulnerable, sick, mid panic attack, Villain. Hero tried to comfort them but the were so scared and acted like they didn’t even see Hero. Villain being delirious accidentally told Hero everything that happened in their childhood through sobs and vomiting.
After hearing that, Hero tries to coax Villain back to bed but they felt like they couldn’t move, so Hero carried them. Hero ended up calming Villain down and putting them to sleep.
All while Superhero was still on the phone, realizing Hero and Villains relationship.
Part 2: After last night, Hero decided to take the day off to take care of Villain. Villain was asleep but Hero was up and they got a phone call from Superhero, telling them that they have to come into work today because they are short staffed. Hero tried to protest but Superhero wasn’t hearing any of it. Villain eventually woke up while Hero was trying to sneak out Villain started whining and crying that they need Hero with them but Hero left, but not before putting Villain back to sleep.
While Hero was working, Superhero broke into their apartment while Villain was awake. Villain, being delirious enough as it is, thought it was Hero coming home from work but soon realized that it was Superhero, but it was too late. They were on the floor because Superhero sedated them to drag them out the house. But hero walks in on it.
Short story of it: Part one: Villain and Hero are dating and Villain is sick and delirious and has to throw up, causing a panic attack. Hero walks in on it while on the phone with Superhero and forgets to hang up before helping them. They put Villain back to bed and the next day they decide to stay home.
Part two: Superhero said they have to go in today so Hero does. Superhero brakes into their apartment and give Villain a sedative so they can take them back to their base, but hero walks in on it.
Delirious Villain x Hero, part One:
Anon, talk about putting in the work! This isn’t a prompt but itself a fully plotted out story that you should be proud of thinking of, I would never have imagined this no matter how hard I tried! It is such a fun concept to explore, and I basically have it roadmapped for me— so seriously, thank you for this prompt, it is my honour to put my spin on it <3
I hope you enjoy~ and very sorry for the hUUUUGE delay but part 2 + 3 will come, I will continue this, it was very hard to get the emotion right, so sorry for the delay again I just wanted it to pack the right punch
CW: vomit (described in disgusting detail, it made me a bit queasy ngl), general sickness, fever, hallucinations, distraught whumpee, villain whumpee, past abuse implied, past abuse described, PTSD, panic attacks, hyperventilating, anxiety, past fear, fear of being sick, past trauma, traumatic sickness, forced caretaking, Whumpee doesn’t want caretaking, hero caretaking, hero caretaker, hero x villain, weird listening superhero, being spied on, worried Hero, worried caretaker, familial abuse, abuse of power, vulnerable whumpee, past whump implied, past whump, invasive whumper, invasive Whump (making whumpee vomit physically)
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Hero was checking their phone every five seconds. Villain was currently at home, burning up, after having barely slept last night. Everytime Hero tried to bring them a cool cloth, or ibuprofen or paracetamol, Villain batted their help away, saying with their usual reassuring smile it’s just a cold. I’ll get over it. It’s just a 24 hour bug, I’ll be fine in the morning.
The metro doors opened and the announcer chimed that they were below Hero Tower HQ, South. Hero put their phone away, worrying their bottom lip as they stepped out onto the platform and walked with the crowd up the steps. The bustling streets of Central buzzed around Hero as they ascended to the busy streets of the city.
Hero pressed the button for the traffic light, waiting for the green man to turn on. Hero pulled their phone out of their pocket again.
Still no messages from Villain.
Maybe Hero shouldn’t be here. Maybe they should call in sick and go home and look after Villain. Villain hated being sick, and not in the way that most people did. It was more than just an inconvenience that it would have been to Hero or anyone else. It was an absolute denial and fear, because Villain didn’t want to get sick so they never got sick. It was out of sheer force of will, that in all the four years Hero had known Villain and the last few months they had lived together, last night was the first time Hero had even known Villain could get sick.
The traffic lights changed to red, and the green man for walking turned on and Hero walked across the road, debating whether or not to go home and be with Villain.
“Don’t be dramatic,” Villain had said, their nose stuffy. “You have to work. You like working.”
“Yeah but I like you more,” said Hero. Villain smiled, put a hand on Hero’s knee and squeezed. “Vil—“
“You’re going. End of story. I’ll just be at home making soup and watching Judge Judy or something, I’ll be fine.”
“Why won’t you let me look after you?”
“You can look after me, after work, okay?”
“Vil—“
“Why are you arguing with a sick person?” Villain asked with a lacklustre grin. “Tell you what, if I get bad tomorrow and I need you, I’ll text you, okay Mom?”
Hero rolled their eyes when Villain leaned over and kissed their forehead, as if that was the end of the conversation and Villain wanted Hero to drop it. So Hero did.
And now they felt terrible. They should really go home. Hero turned to cross the pedestrian crossing again when they saw Superhero on the opposite side, grinning at them. Superhero raised a hand in a wave and said: “Hero! Glad to see I’m not the only one running late today.”
Well they were fucked. Now they had to go into work. Maybe they could fake an illness later and get away early. Superhero was beside them then and Hero naturally fell into step with them, turning to walk towards the Hero Tower that rose higher than the buildings surrounding it.
“That villain on twelfth by the docks, Patrelli got a lead in the case so we got a debrief on that this morning,” said Superhero in his thick Italian-American accent. “Plus the mayor has summoned us to City Hall for god knows what—“
“Probably giving out that he’s forced to pay a parking fine,” Hero grumbled, their eyes still glued to their phone as Superhero laughed. A booming, happy sound. Superhero opened the door for Hero and followed through to the foyer after.
“Probably,” Superhero agreed. The pair were stopped at the reception by Conny who held up a pen and a card. “It’s for Creta,” said Conny and Superhero nodded, taking the pen and signing his name.
“She still in the hospital?” Superhero asked, concerned, handing Hero the pen absently. Hero took it and signed their name beside Superhero’s. Then handed the pen back to a sad looking Conny.
“Yeah. She is furious. She hates being useless.”
Superhero nodded sympathetically, saying: “well tell her from me that she wasn’t useless when we put that maniac behind bars.”
“I’ll tell her,” said Conny. “It will mean a lot to her.”
They said their goodbyes and walked to the lift. When they got in, Hero took their phone out again after the doors slid closed.
Then the lift stopped. Hero looked up to see Superhero’s finger on the stop button, and raised an eyebrow in question.
Superhero nodded at the phone in Hero’s hand and said: “what’s wrong?”
Hero straightened on instinct, putting the phone down at their side. “Nothing. Nothing’s wrong.”
“Then why’re you checking your phone every five seconds?” Superhero asked, arms folded over a broad chest, moulded from years of gruelling training.
Hero thought about lying and playing it off, but they thought of Villain at home alone, sick and they had to tell the truth. Superhero already suspected something was wrong anyways.
“My partner,” Hero sighed, rocking back on their heels and slumping against the metal wall of the lift. “They’re sick at home right now, and they hate being sick and they wouldn’t tell me how bad they were yesterday but I know they had a fever last night and—“
“Okay, Hero,” said Superhero gently. “It’s okay.”
“They never get sick though, and they’re so stubborn that they refuse to accept any help. Last night they wouldn’t even take any painkillers and—“
Superhero put a hand on Hero’s shoulder and squeezed reassuringly. “It’s okay, Hero,” Superhero said again. “It’s only natural to be concerned about the ones we love, especially in our line of work where we can’t exactly turn the hero thing off.”
Hero laughed weakly at that, mumbling a breathy “yeah.”
“And some people are also just bad patients,” Superhero continued. “Some people don’t want others to see them sick because they’re vulnerable and weak—“
“But I don’t think that,” said Hero.
Superhero nodded with that same gentle smile and said: “but your partner probably does. It must be hard for them to know you’re a strong Hero saving people everyday, they don’t want you to feel you have to save them.”
“But I want to help,” Hero pouted and Superhero nodded again.
“I know. So here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna go upstairs and attend the debrief from the docks and after you can go home and look after your partner.”
Hero’s eyes lit up at that, “really?”
Superhero nodded with a slight laugh and dropped their hand from Hero’s shoulder, turning to press the start button on the lift again. “Yeah really. You never take time off, I’ll tell the boss you weren’t feeling great.”
“You’re a good friend, Superhero,” said Hero softly. Superhero shot a grin back over his shoulder, “yeah you’re not too bad yourself.”
*~*~*~*~*
Villain woke from their fitful sleep in a panic, peeling themselves from the sticky sheets beneath them, their body slick with sweat acting like an adhesive with the bed. The movement was too sudden, too much, Villain’s entire world spinning as their knees hit the ground beside the bed.
That horrible, familiar warm feeling crawling up their throat and threatening to burst, but Villain didn’t… they didn’t want to. They didn’t want to.
“I don’t want it,” they said their speech slurred and far away as they swallowed and shook their head, trying to swallow to stop the inevitable. “I don’t want it. Idonwanto please… please don’t…”
A sudden rush from their swirling stomach climbing hot up Villain’s throat and despite themselves they pushed up off their knees and into the bathroom. Bare feet padding against the tile. Villain grabbed the lid of the toilet and yanked it up, along with the seat and grabbed the edges of the bowl, the cool porcelain barely offering any comfort. They were still too hot. Too warm. Burning from the inside out.
“No… no… no… please don’t…I’m sorry for eating, I said I was sorry…. Please…” Villain sobbed to the empty room, snot running readily down their lips and dripping from their chin into the toilet bowl.
A hand settled heavy on Villain’s shoulder, burning them with the touch. “If you don’t throw up in the next five seconds you’ll be sorry, Vil.”
“No,” Villain wail, then gagged on their own tears and saliva and shoved it down their throat again. “Please… I’ll be good. I don’t want… I donwantople—“
Another hot hand on the back of Villain’s neck and their head was slammed over the toilet bowl, pinning them against the bowl and with the force of it, Villain couldn’t fight the feeling that crawled warm and thick up their throat and despite every fibre of their being fighting against it Villain vomited violently into the bowl.
Villain threw themselves back with a sob, their back hitting the porcelain wall of the tub, legs bent beneath them on the cool tile as Villain wiped their mouth with the back of their arm, panicked sobs wracking through their body.
“You have to do it again, Villain.”
“I can’t please—“ Villain begged, pleading with air.
“You can and you will. Look at you. You’re pathetic. Crying and covered in your own snot and sweat.”
“Please brother, please,” Villain croaked. “Please I don’t—“
“You don’t want to?!” Brother snarled, and Villain shrunk back on themselves. Shivering on the floor and hugging their arms around themselves. “Were you going to tell No, Villain?”
“I—“ Villain began then they were on their knees, hugging the toilet as another wave of vomit slid vicious up their throat. They coughed and spluttered and still it came. All the while Brother stood beside them, phantom hand in Villain’s hair, screaming: “I decide what you do and do not want, Villain. You think you can look after yourself? You’re so weak you can’t even fight me off. Can’t even think about trying to fight me. So weak you can’t even tell your beloved Hero about any of this.”
“Leave… them… alone,” Villain said, then hurled for the third time into the bowl, hacking and gasping. Villain sucked in a breath through their clogged up mouth, because their nose was filled with still streaming snot. They were disgusting. They looked disgusting. They should be able to fight this, but no. Brother is right. Brother’s always right.
A phantom hand began petting Villain’s sweat slicked hair and it made them want to gag again. “It’s so cute how you defend your little Hero. You used to do that with Mom and Dad too, do you remember? They still abandoned you after you did that. Just like Hero will.”
“No,” Villain sobbed, their voice a strangled cry as a fresh wave of tears started rolling down their cheeks. “Hero love me.”
“Parents are supposed to love you too, Vil. You’re just… unlovable. Don’t worry, though, when I find you again I’ll love you how you should be loved. We can pick up where we left off… would you like that?”
“NO!” Villain screamed, throwing a weak arm behind them and wacking it off the radiator instead of Brother. “GET AWAY FROM ME! LEAVE ME—“ Villain descended into another coughing fit “—ALONE! Leave! LEAVE! You’re not REAL!”
Villain started coughing again, their chest rising and falling heavy from the effort of screaming and they moaned into the bowl of the toilet seat as they felt another gurgling in their stomach and knew they would be vomiting again in a minute.
They were miserable, and feeling sorry for themselves and all they wanted was to be healthy. They didn’t want to dredge that dark hole of their childhood up again. Didn’t want to hear Brother’s voice so clear… warmth creeped up their throat and this time Villain didn’t fight it.
*~*~*~*~*
Hero unlocked the door to the apartment finally. Their phone was between their shoulder and their ear, grocery bags hanging out of them filled with chicken and vegetables, chicken soups and more painkillers. Hero threw in a couple of those gel ice packs too just to make sure Villain would cool down and feel more comfortable.
“No, Superhero, they’ll be fine. You don’t need to come over…”
“Why not?”
“Because they’re sick and they don’t even want me seeing them like this,” said Hero, dropping their bags and their keys on the kitchen counters. “Thank you for the sentiment really— I’ll just need a few days.”
“Of course, Hero—“ Hero blanked the rest of whatever Superhero said as they heard Villain screaming from the bathroom then coughing up a lung.
“GET AWAY FROM ME! LEAVE ME—“ Villain cried, descending into a fit of coughs and Hero ran to the bathroom, giving Superhero a hasty goodbye and dropping to their knees beside Villain who was draped over the toilet bowl, vomit crawling thick up their spine like an alien followed by the unpleasant sound in the toilet.
“Villain! Villain! I’m here—“
“Alone! Leave! LEAVE! YOU’RE NOT REAL!” Villain cried, shaking their head and hugging the toilet bowl tighter.
“Vil…” Hero said softly, but they didn’t put a hand on them. Instead they ran back to the kitchen filling a glass with water and took the half melted gel ice packs from the bag and ran back into Villain. They grabbed a towel from the wall and draped it over Villain’s shoulders gently.
Villain flinched at the contact, jerking back violently and swinging a hand out aimed at Hero. Hero dodged it and sank to their knees beside Villain, gently pushing the ice pack to Villain’s forehead. Villain let out an audible sigh and let their weight fall into Hero’s hand.
“Vil… it’s me. It’s Hero. I got off work.”
“He… Hero…” Villain croaked and then broke down into a fit of sobs. Hero didn’t know what to do. So they just gently pushed them away from the toilet seat, let their back lean against the back of the bath and sat across from them, keeping the ice pack on Villain’s forehead.
“You’re burning up, Vil,” said Hero. “You should’ve called me!”
“Didn’t…” Villain said, out of breath and exhausted. “Didn’t wanna.”
“Why?” Hero implored, voice bordering on desperate. Villain put a clammy hand over Hero’s on their forehead and opened their eyes, looking at Hero.
“Didn’t want you to see h-him,” said Villain with an effort. “To see me like this.”
As if on cue Villain jerked forward and hugged the toilet bowl as another round of vomit wracked Villain’s body. Hero put a hand on their back and rubbed soft circles in their back as Villain groaned and spit. Then they started shaking over the bowl, and Hero whispered soothing sweet nothings to them.
Villain shook their head, sniffing. “You don’t know.. you don’t know,” Villain wailed.
“Don’t know what, Vil?”
Villain cried harder at the question, shaking their head.
“I can’t… I can’t… I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I don’t want to vomit again please brother, please—“ Villain mewled, sobbing and shaking their head. Before Hero could say anything Villain gagged and another wave of vomit tore through them, shuddering and sobs followed the particularly violent attack.
“Just hit me,” Villain whispered, coughing into the bowl and spitting out phlegm. “Just beat me today, please. Just hit me. I’ll be good. I’ll be good. I’ll be good, Brother, please.”
Hero was sitting on their calves, rubbing soothing circles on Villain’s back and stunned into silence. Hero didn’t know who Brother was. They had never heard that name before from Villain, but whatever they did to Villain clearly traumatised them.
Shocked tears refused to fall from Hero’s eyes, but Villain wasn’t the only one feeling sick as Villain continued to babble and plead between bouts of vomiting. It must have been an hour or two they spent on the bathroom floor, Villain begging with ghosts to stop hurting them, to stop making them throw up. Forcing them to vomit.
It became so heart wrenchingly clear why Villain didn’t like being sick, and didn’t want Hero to be there when they were.
Hero was glad they were there. Helping Villain, being there for Villain trying to comfort them in whatever way they could.
After what felt like years Villain sat back against the bath, smacking their tongue against their dry mouth. They found Hero’s eyes and they tried for a smile, a bit more clarity and recognition in their gaze.
“I… I think it’s finished now,” said Villain and Hero nodded, still frozen in place, but they forced their limbs to move forward. “Hero…”
“Let’s get you to the bedroom, Vil, then we can talk,” said Hero. Villain didn’t fight them, they didn’t have the energy. Hero put an arm behind Villain’s shoulder, gently placing Villain’s heavy arm around Hero’s neck, then under their knees. Villain let out a groan as Hero hoisted them up. “Are you okay?”
“Mmm,” said Villain. Hero didn’t know if that was a yes or no but it was okay.
Villain was dead weight in Hero’s arms, not even having the energy to hold themselves and lighten the burden they were putting on poor Hero. They shouldn’t be sick and they hated themselves for feeling like this, but having Hero see them like this.
They would never forgive themselves.
Hero drew the bedsheets back and lay Villain down on the mattress and pillow. “I’m going to get the ice packs, are you okay?”
Fresh tears were streaming down Villain’s face at the embarrassment… but they croaked out a hoarse: “yeah.”
Hero nodded, going back to the bathroom and picking up the stray ice packs before returning to Villain’s side. When they got back Villain was already asleep. Hero let out a soft sigh, worrying their bottom lip as they watched Villain’s chest rise and fall peacefully.
The ice packs were still cold in Hero’s hands but they were dripping, and they didn’t want to put them on Villain and risk waking them up. So they put them back in the freezer and walked back to the bathroom to clean it up.
They flushed the toilet and opened the window to let out the smell, gathered the damp towels from the ground and put them in the laundry hamper. They cleaned the toilet, and mopped the sweat up from the floor with a towel. They’d actually mop later. They didn���t really want to be away from Villain right now.
Before Hero left the bathroom they saw their phone on the ground and picked it up pocketing it.
They thought they had ended the call with Superhero so there was no need to check the phone.
No need to check the call logs and see that in their panic over Villain’s screaming, they didn’t actually end the call when they thought they did.
If Hero did check their call logs they’d have realised that Superhero didn’t end the call either. A two minute call turned into a forty-five minute call, Superhero too shocked to drop the phone from their ear when they heard Villain’s voice.
Villain.
Their enemy.
The person Hero was so worried about being sick, that they rushed home and left work early for. When Hero never left work early.
It all suddenly made terrible, awful sense to Superhero why they had never met Hero’s partner. Always an excuse made to stop them from meeting.
The betrayal stung in Superhero’s chest and when they finally ended the call, they nearly crushed their phone in their hand with how tight they were holding it.
*~*~*~*~*
Continued here.
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dollfacefantasy · 6 months ago
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WORKS IN PROGRESS ♡
resident evil: 🝮 and i want it all - leon kennedy x fem!reader ⤷ you're the first lady, and leon is one of the secret service agents assigned to protecting your husband. why is he spending so much time around you then?
🝮 pound puppy - resident evil men x puppy-hybrid!fem!reader ⤷ an incident has occurred in d.c.'s military hybrid shelter. this is the report detailing that case.
🝮 room for one more part 2 - chris x fem!reader x leon ⤷ after last night, the mission commences. chris is more occupied with picking up the pieces between you and him.
🝮 needy girl part 2 - leon kennedy x fem!reader ⤷ wedding bells are ringing in your and leon's near future.
jujutsu kaisen: 🝮 on a short leash - satoru gojo x puppy-hybrid!fem!reader ⤷ assigned to a mission he believes is below him, satoru gojo struggles to get along with the girl he's been tasked with protecting.
🝮 so this isn't just puppy love part 2 - satoru gojo x fem!reader ⤷ suguru's back home. you and satoru have to manage your new connection with your owner overseeing the both of you again.
🝮 lost in the fire - yakuza!sukuna x fem!reader ⤷ no one rips off ryomen sukuna. after your father tries doing just that, you're offered up to the king as penance for his crimes.
the walking dead: 🝮 good cop, bad cop - rick grimes x fem!reader x shane walsh ⤷ the group on the farm can't decide what to do with you after catching you out on a run, so shane takes matters into his own hands. he can't let a pretty thing like you go to waste.
marvel: 🝮 i wanna be yours part 2 - logan howlett x puppy-hybrid!fem!reader ⤷ logan and puppy girl continue feeling out their relationships as new obstacles arise with her being part of the x-men.
🝮 lucky charm - logan howlett x fem!reader ⤷ there's always room for the wolverine at the table. and with him, always comes his lucky charm.
🝮 kick back and relax - old man!logan howlett x fem!reader ⤷ logan can't sleep so you gotta show him how to kick back and relax.
🝮 we can't be friends - logan howlett x fem!reader ⤷ for the last time, you and logan are JUST friends. why can't everyone else understand that already.
🝮 i'll make it feel like the first time - logan howlett x fem!reader ⤷ you were never close to your universe's logan. that doesn't mean you can't be close to this one.
🝮 true love waits - scott summers x yandere!fem!reader ⤷ for as long as you've known scott summers, you've known he's the one for you. he might not know that yet, but it's ok. because true love waits.
🝮 girl talk - ororo munroe x fem!reader ⤷ you and storm are so close. even if you weren't a telepath, you're pretty sure the two of you wouldn't need words to communicate.
🝮 and i mean that - matt murdock x fem!reader x elektra natchios ⤷ it's been years since you've seen matt and elektra, your two lovers from college who burned bright but fast. tonight you spot them at a party. together. without you.
🝮 i wish i hated you - frank castle x fem!reader ⤷ frank cannot stand you. the fact that he can't stop hanging around you doesn't make that any less true.
dc: 🝮 undone - jason todd x fem!reader ⤷ it's the end of the night, and it's jason’s turn to take you apart.
🝮 where you lead - jason todd x fem!reader ⤷ you finally have the chance to make your dreams reality. why does jason have to be so hellbent on getting in the way of that?
the boys: 🝮 collared & leashed (not clickbait) - billy butcher x fem!reader ⤷ when billy finds out his baby likes the idea of wearing a collar, he does what any man in their right mind would. he goes out and buys one for you.
🝮super fan - soldier boy x fem!reader ⤷ as soldier boy's biggest fan, he lets you stroke more than just his ego.
death note: 🝮 spin the bottle - light yagami x fem!reader x l lawliet ⤷ you wanna play spin the bottle with the two men handcuffed together. they indulge you for reasons of their own.
works not yet titled: 🝮 arranged marriage with gojo one shot 🝮 toji and gojo pornstars 🝮 toji and gojo mma 🝮 satosugu hybrid freaktacular 🝮 rick grimes wedding ring drabble 🝮 dry humping w/ jason todd 🝮 dollification w/ dick grayson 🝮 stepdad!leon & his bestie chris 🝮 satoru gojo x clingy!reader 🝮 rookie munch leon drabble 🝮 chris & leon polycule fic
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teaxeee · 10 months ago
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MeanDom!Jiwoong x Sub!Reader - Fisting, toys, overstim, dumbification, slight bondage (only really mentioned once), stop light method, aftercare, lover!reader, gn!reader, GoodDom!Jiwoong
Reader being needy and subby so Meandom!Jiwoong leads them to the room, ass up and hands tied behind their back.
Unbeknownst to reader, meandom!Jiwoong isn't letting them cum and instead works reader up to his full fist and two fingers in the ass, overstimulating reader to the point of going dumb and begging to cum.
Meandom!Jiwoong denying reader's release so he pulls them back toward him by their hair, stops his fingers and whispers
" are you questioning me slut? and if i pull my fingers out and leave you here all dumb and useless? then what? are you gonna be needy and come crying to me again?"
"no sir.." reader says in a whisper, tearing up but not forgetting his 4 fingers burried deep inside them,
"no what exactly?" meandom!Jiwoong says, looking like he's losing his patience,
"no i'm not questioning *hiccup* you sir.."
Meandom!Jiwoong lets go of reader making them flop down into the pillow and continues fingering both of their small tight holes.
He finally makes it to a full fist and starts mercilessly pounding into readers hole while reader starts screaming and crying tears of pleasure and overstimulation
"please sir please can i cum sir PLEASE sirrr"
Meandom!Jiwoong ignores their begging and pulls his fingers out their ass, replacing them with a long thin silicone vibrator custom made to reach the prostate and plug the ass in the process. He puts it in slowly and continues fisting the reader,
After a while of fisting, the reader can no longer form coherent sentences. All thats coming out their mouth are please and mumbles. Meandom!Jiwoong stops his fist and leans down to the reader
"color baby?" he says in a sweet whisper, drastically different to the last time they spoke.
"green honey please don't stop" reader says back gently, but he notices how worn out they sound.
Meandom!Jiwoong slowly starts his hand up again, this time going in deeper and more toward the g-spot, having reader moaning and begging again in no time.
He starts up the prostate vibrator on high level making the reader scream. He starts pounding the readers g-spot accurately at a good pace,
"cum when you like, i wont be holding back" He says shortly.
"please sir please sir i need to-" reader gets cut off by a harsh slap on the ass
"cum i said." Jiwoong says, speeding up his hand.
Reader cums, eyes rolling back, spasming and squirting all over when Jiwoong pulls his hand out. Jiwoong leaves the plug inside, turned off, because the reader likes feeling nice and full.
Jiwoong gets the reader nice and cleaned up, peppering them with kisses and cooing. He gets in bed alongside them, pulling the plug out and putting his cock in, cockwarming while cuddling them to sleep.
"did i go too hard baby?" Jiwoong says softly, trying not to disturb readers peace.
"no my love, it was perfect" reader reassures him, kissing his nose bridge and cuddling closer to his neck. "you know i'd always tell you if you were making me uncomfortable"
"i know honey" Jiwoong says falling asleep with his content lover in his arms and a smile on his face.
·͜·ᰔᩚ omg i hope this wasnt too much.. i was flooded with Jiwoong brain rot 💀 i was wondering if you could maybe rewrite/refrase and expand on this a bit? I'm a really bad writer lmao 🫂
( i love your work btw, you always end up having something in looking for 🙈🫂❤️)
HELLO?! YOU SHOULD BE A WRITER THIS IS PRE GOLD!! Also I wanna apologize for not answering your ask so soon anonnie, had a lot going on.
I feel like Jiwoong really likes seeing you unable to move as he uses both of your holes. He'd start off slow at first, 2 fingers inside your ass and his cock in your cunt, as he fucks and preps you at the same time, watching how you fall apart from the double penetration. He slowly works his way from 2 fingers, to 3, 4 and finally a full fist, which makes you scream and cry out from the sudden feeling of being full, becoming overstimulated and overwhelmed with pleasure. After a while he pulls out from both of your holes, leaving you empty and begging for more, as he replaces his fist with the plug, as he assaults your hole, his other hand moving to toy with your clit, causing only pleas and soft cries to fall past your lips. He asks and makes sure you're alright, before he allows you to cum. After he's finished with you he makes sure to be very gentle with you, as he kisses all over the places he bruised as small apologies leave past his lips, before he pulls you close and lets you cockwarm him, as you both fall asleep.
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natriae · 1 year ago
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All a bad dream
megumi x reader
im so sad abt megumi rn so imma pretend it's not happening
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screaming
screaming that's all you can hear. Your body is trapped unable to help your boyfriend as he screams in pain. You love Yuji, but they should have killed him the minute he ate that finger. Now your left banging on the barrier that holds you away from your lover.
Your body thrashes in your bed as the moonlight peaks through the blinds. Tears escape your eyes as you're unable to awake up from the nightmare that holds you. Small whispers of '..gumi' left your lips as your conscious brain attempts to wake you up.
Gasping, you were finally able to lift your body out of the dream and into the real world. Tears didn't stop streaming down your face as your heart broke remembering the pain megumi was in. Attempting to suck in air through your whines you turn over to see the red lights of you clock read '2:37'. Slowly you wiped your eyes and got off your bed to place your slippers on.
You know your not allowed to go to the boys dormitory, but you can't be alone right now. As a jujutsu sorcerer you should know this comes with the job, but as a human you can't let yourself accept that. Sliding open your door you cautiously step out, wiping tears along the way, and slowly make your way down the halls getting scared at any small noises.
Once at Megumi's door your body hesitated. This was stupid. It clearly wasn't real, but why can't you stop your heart from beating so fast? You left small knocks on the door before sliding it open. The sight alone of your boyfriend's bed head as he twists under his covers was enough to open the flood gates again.
The young boy's head turned towards the moonlight after he heard the fimilar small wimpers and sniffles. Rubbing his eyes he noticed his girlfriend sobbing at his door clearly worried if she angered her boyfriend. Quickly he got out of bed and ran over to her.
"what happ-"
However, before he could finish his sentence her arms wrapped around his body and loud sobs became muffled in his chest. Slowly, he stepped back, closing the door as they entered the room, and held his girl close.
Megumi wasn't one to know how to comfort people, but this felt right. One hand on her back while the other held her head to his chest. He waited till her sobs quieted down before asking what happened. It was almost three am and she's at his dorm crying in his arms.
"i had a bad dream.." she whispered, slightly muffled by the boy's shirt, but he understood her perfectly.
"do you wanna stay here?" he asked calmly. He pet her head as her hurt eyes look up at his like a puppy. She nodded slowly as he led her to his bed. Slowly he laid her head on his chest as his hand rubbed up and down her back.
"you were hurt-" a quick breath in, " and i couldn't do anything but watch," she continued, shaking her head trying to hold in the tears as she spoke.
"shh, you don't need to tell me right now. I'm here" the ravenette responded, leaving a feather light kiss on her head. Quickly he summoned one of his demon dogs to lay on his chest and leave a big kiss on his saddened girlfriend face. It worked because she let out a soft giggle as she pet it's back.
"thank you gumi," she whispered before falling a sleep. He would have a lot to explain to Gojo tomorrow.
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