#i view sex as another metric to see if we’re compatible but i’m happy not to rush it
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#saw D again a few days ago#it was confusing lmao he didn’t want to hook up because he said he ‘def wants a relationship but isn’t sure about me’#and i’m like THANK GOD? don’t be sure about me after 4 dates in 1.5 weeks??#i view sex as another metric to see if we’re compatible but i’m happy not to rush it#it’s just not something i’m used to#but i will say we did make out and the kissing was MUCH improved we just needed a sec#but now he’s away for 3 weeks so i told him to text me if he wants to when he’s back#but i don’t want to anxiously maintain object permanence for 3 weeks#but honestly the fact that this man can be hard and be offered head and say NO for emotionally legitimate reasons#IS SO SEXY???#but my goblin brain is of course saying that he doesn’t want to fuck me bc my body is gross#she’s always saying shit#and the taylor swift album drop wants me to text T SOOOOOOOO BADDDDDDD#oh also when D was over even tho we had that weird convo he was so snuggly#which also makes me furious with T#this near stranger can hold me in a fulfilling manner but he couldn’t even spoon me#but yeah he stacked himself on top of me like both on our stomachs and i read something to him#it was lovely
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