#i used to be actively involved in the perth polyamory scene

[not-poignant]

During these past two weeks I've had one hell of an emotional rollercoaster. First week I thought I'd be losing two people I hold really dear, because one of them is in love with me and I'm in love with the other one. And they're both best friends with each other. And then we decided, to my big surprise, that we'd try to make it work as a poly relationship. And since then I've been so happy... But also everything is much more intense. (1/3)

All positive things, all negative things... are multiplied. I haven't known I was poly before and never thought it even was an option, so there's a lot of new feelings to sort out. It feels like discovering a new sexuality kinda. So many things from my past make sense now. Either way, I almost broke down at work today, cause I thought I had missed an important meeting. Turns out I hadn't, but it completely exhausted me. // I think I'm stressed out and emotionally exhausted. In these times, I go to your blog to feel better, which is also why I'm here now. I love the characters you write. I love immersing myself in your universes. So, just, really... sorry for ranting and all but, thank you so much for everything you do. I hope everything goes well for you.

*

Hi anon,

Firstly, polyamory is an orientation for sure. But because monogamy is so normalised, people think of polyamory more as a ‘kink’ instead of a fundamental way of being. And just like other forms of sexuality, you can be wholly monogamous, or wholly polyamorous, or existing on a spectrum where it���s different for different people and relationships. There are also different types of polyamory, and well, yeah. :)

Poly is a huge spectrum, and it’s great that you’re exploring it for the first time (and yes, it can be very intense, especially when you have double the amount of ‘new relationship energy’ to deal with, which is intense for most people - communication and honesty helps a lot, and I don’t know how much research you’re doing, but there’s lots of blogs on successful polyamory that are incredible and I highly recommend googling for some support on that front; because you won’t get it in the mainstream media, which sucks).

So I have a lot of respect for what you’re going through! NRE (new relationship energy) does settle down and become less intense, and some people miss that, but honestly I like when the intense positive/negative phase relaxes and things become more settled and even comfortable, because you can trust in what’s happening a bit more. (Also can I just say how fucking happy it makes me when a situation like yours is solved with polyamory and communication but anyway).

I’m glad the blog helps as well! I’m sorry for not being very communicative this week! I’m actually catching up with my messages now. I like coming here too, everyone is awesome and I get to hear about all these different things and I know I don’t know all the details of your life or anything anon, but I wish you the best with what you’re experiencing!