#i thought abt rejecting him but i was like nah i dont have that kind of emotional capacity

[etoiile]

RAINY REDEMPTION

synopsis: your ex-boyfriend shows up at your doorstep, soaked from the rain and hoping for a second chance.

starring mikage reo!

genre(s): angst/comfort, fluff at the end, exes to lovers wc- 1.4k

notes: first time trying angst like this. hope you enjoy!!

the last person you had expected to see upon opening your door was your ex-boyfriend of 2 months, mikage reo. he stood before you, soaked from the rain from head to toe, wearing a sheepish smile that contradicted the unease in his eyes. "can i come in?" he asked, his voice laced with uncharacteristic hesitancy. "it's really pouring outside."

stunned and speechless, you merely gestured for him to enter, an invitation he swiftly accepted. as you darted wordlessly to fetch a towel, a tumult of thoughts stormed your mind, each raindrop that fell echoing a question.

what was he doing here? why was he out in the rain? he never ventured into this part of town. what's going on?

shaking off these thoughts, you handed him the towel. grateful, he quickly began drying his hair – the beautiful, fluffy hair you used to run your hands through, to which he'd almost purr as he melted into your touch. the hair that had been long enough for you to braid and accessorize, filling an entire album on your phone dedicated to the different looks you'd given him. it had been months since you last saw it, and now, with no explanation, it was in your apartment.

breaking the silence, you questioned, "what are you doing here, reo?" your voice, calm and level, carried a coldness unfamiliar to him. he disliked it greatly.

"i was taking a walk, and it started raining." he answered simply.

you knew immediately and without a doubt that he was lying. you knew him best, after all.

eyeing him, you demanded, "what are you really doing here?"

a chuckle escaped his lips. that low, boyish chuckle that still sent shivers down your spine. he scratched the nape of his neck before nervously joking, "you got me. you always did know when i was lying."

"what are you doing here, reo?" you snarled, a sharp edge to your voice.

panic and fear washed over his features before he blurted,

"i still love you, y/n."

you took a moment to process his words before your entire world began to spin before your eyes.

your heart pounded, and your vision got fuzzy. your knees went weak, feeling like they might give out. nausea hit you hard, and you wanted to faint, cry, and run away—all at once. it was like a rainstorm of emotions hitting you like a torrent, messing with your whole system.

"..no."

"no?"

"no!" you screamed, tears flowing. instinctively, reo reached out to wipe them away, but you slapped his hand away, making him wince.

"you cannot," you sobbed, "break my heart, tell me it's over, and not talk to me for months,"

reo's eyes began to water too.

"and then come marching back to me, and tell me you fucking love me, reo. no. you cannot do that to me."

"y/n," reo started, but you cut him off.

"i," you breathed through tears, "was just starting to get over you, to come to terms with the fact that you didn't want me around anymore."

by now, reo was freely crying too.

"and then you just waltz through my doorway to tell me you love me? are you kidding me?"

"y/n," reo tried to start again, coming as close to you as he thought you'd let him. "i'm so sorry."

"you're sorry? that's it?" you spat angrily.

"hurting you," he uttered, "was the greatest mistake of my entire life."

gently, he took your hands in his, relief washing over him when you didn't push him away.

"i did so much to tell myself that i'd be fine, that you were just another girl, and i'd find someone else." you almost rolled your eyes.

"but it wasn't true," he breathed. "not one bit. not even close. no one," he squeezed your hands, "could ever come close to you."

"i miss your voice. i miss your laugh. i miss waking up in the morning and seeing you smile. i miss spending time with you doing anything: cuddling and a movie, buying groceries, baking things, going to restaurants. y/n, i miss you so much my entire body hurts when someone mentions your name. i miss you, y/n, and i'm so, so sorry that i hurt you."

you're sobbing uncontrollably now, and his heart aches, knowing he's the one who made you this way. he'd always hated seeing you cry, but he hated it a thousand times more when he was the cause. he vowed to never make you cry like this ever again if you decided to let him back in.

hesitantly, he reached up to your face, fingers trembling with the fear that you'd push him away once more. luckily, you don't. you don't slap him, nor do you yell at him. instead, you let him tenderly wipe the tears from your skin, a silent ode to his love. it felt like a soothing melody in the midst of chaos, a gentle reassurance. you allowed him to cup your tear-stained face, a silent acknowledgment that, in this fragile moment, a sliver of hope had found its way into both of your hearts.

"y/n, i need you. the months we've spent apart have torn me apart completely. so much so that i couldn't even get out of bed to get to practice. nagi had to come get me out of bed, and that should really tell you something."

he winced as he observed your unamused expression, then took a deep breath.

"i know i can't change the past. no matter how much i wish i could, i will never be able to take back the harsh words i said. i will never be able to undo my horrible actions. i know i was a terrible boyfriend to you, y/n, but please. i love you. i know i need to respect your wishes and boundaries, but if you still love me too, i'm not going anywhere." he looked at you desperately, his purple orbs silently pleading with you. "do you?"

silence lingered, the air thick with trepidation. then, you broke down again, burying your head in his shoulder. "of course i do," you mumbled softly, sobbing. relief deluged his body, and his hold on you tightened ever so slightly.

"reo, i love you with every fiber of my being. i love you so much that i never stopped thinking about you for a single minute since we split. i love you so much it took all of my willpower not to jump into your arms the moment i opened the door. reo, i love you so much that it scares me." you confessed, your voice no higher than a whisper. if he hadn't been desperately clinging onto your every word and move, he wouldn't have heard it.

"then please. one more chance. we can make this work, i promise. i swear to you with my life that i'll be better. i'll make you happy. i'll do everything in my power to be the best lover you've ever had." he looks at you anxiously, trying to read your expression. "we can take it slow. ease back into it. but please don't give up on me, on us, just yet. im begging you."

in the quiet aftermath that followed his plea, a heavy silence settled. the air thickened as his words lingered, creating an atmosphere filled with uncertainty and anticipation. your contemplative gaze met his desperate one, and for a moment, time stood still.

"please, y/n. i need you."

you stayed silent for a bit, and he held his breath the entire time. his heart was beating so fast he thought it'd leap out of his body.

"ok." you finally sighed. "let's give it another shot."

elation, bright as the sun after rain, soared through his body as he engulfed you in his embrace. the warmth flooded all your senses as he squeezed you tight, never wanting to let you go.

"thank you," he whispered, tears soaking your shirt. "thank you so, so much."

a nod subtly affirmed, an unspoken acknowledgment of the gravity in the air. "yeah," you breathed gently, taking in what had just occurred. "it'll be ok. we'll be ok."

"i love you," he sobbed, the words pouring out in earnest. "i love you so, so much."

excitement and joy rushed through his body like a heavy downpour upon hearing the four magical words you next uttered:

"i love you too."

© 𝐄𝐓𝐎𝐈𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 please do not copy or repost my work on any other site. interactions appreciated! 🤍

[razzmothazz]

random thoughts with razz

i saw some people talk lately abt who would get abnormality dancin girl in pjsk and i get why most people say n25 should have it because of mafuyu.. uhhh nah i disagree heavily on that one

[rant below]

like most people say the song should go to mafuyu but it doesnt work for her at all imo, shes not getting rid of her nice girl persona because its like a safety net for her she can fall back on [im not sure how to explain what i mean here exactly but you get the point], if anything many parts would fit ena more especially the ones about feeling like youre average at best at anything you do, but even then the rest of the song doesnt really work besides that. some parts may fit mizuki better as well, rejecting normality etc. but definetly not mafuyu

since the song has a pretty clear theme of school the obvious group would be l/n, which i think somehow works! they got the lost ones weeping already which deals with similar stuff as this song, tho im not sure how well the lyrics fit them exactly.. the sound of the song in itself definetly fits them imo, i could see it being another ichika and shiho cover maybe [i just love their voices together sorry im biased]

my next best pick would probably be vbs tho, an and akito seem to work pretty well since theyre not doing the best at school and often mention how tired of it they are, im not sure if the sound of the song itself fits them that well but i can definetly see it. the theme of feeling like youre never good enough work wonderfully for them as well, most clearly for akito but an deals with that too.. but even then i dont feel like the lyrics themselves fit them that well, but thats kind of the case for every group when i really think about it, the parts about going absolutely bonkers insane is especially difficult to place for me

i also saw someone say they can see wxs covering this one which i didnt even think about tbh.. i can kind of see certain lyrics fitting tsukasa, especially with the context of whatever the hell was going on with him in his latest focus event..a lot of them fit rui as well, the theme of rejecting being perceived as normal works with him just as well as it works for mizuki, tbh i can even see nene singing it somewhat, but im not sure about the sound of the song.. doesnt really have a wxs vibe but thats not a huge issue

anyway rant over if u have thoughts abt it please share because i actually love speculations like these !!!

[jul-bilant]

Prince!Seungcheol

prince seungcheol

he was always the buzz around the whole kingdom *i mean y wouldnt he?? have you sEEN the guy????*

he’s always going around town, supervising incase any dumbass decided to sell drugs around the block or smth

(he once caught one and he didnt kno seungcheol was the prince and offered him marijuana and got arrested bc of tht and bc seungcheol got offended lmao)

and whenever he passes by, theres always gonna be some thirstyass girls staring at him like

“oMF SAMANTHA ITS PRINCE SEUNGCHEOL”

“SHUT UP JESS HE’S GONNA HEAR YOU DIMWIT”

or like

*runs up to him* “cAN I BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND??”

and tbh seungcheol just deadass rejects her but like,,, politely bc pRINCE MANNERS

and thats why he has two bodyguards with him at all times outside the palace now

anyways;;; prince seungcheol’s rlly rlly rLLY polite and well-mannered

he’s also a smart boi like

8 yr old seungcheol can solve 10th grade algebra, write a whole 10+ paged essay abt cytology and find the cure for cancer

kidding lol *nOT*

but srsly, this boi is smarter than yo algebra teachers like bi h

and he’s also sort of leader-like, so people already know he’ll be a great king one day

but he also has a kind heart and cares for everyone he loves and the whole kingdom

a 5 yr old girl once tripped over a rock infront of him and he took her to a bench, bought a bandage and aided her scraped knee ;-;

you can tell im soft for seungcheol hhhh

anyways, he’s been stressing out for a while because his coronation as king is nearing and it’s in a few months since his father died a year ago

and he needs to find a suitable partner

thats where you come in

you’re a maid in the palace

the maids have a thing where they check on seungcheol every two or three hours to see if he’s hungry, needs smth, or anything like tht

and this time, you were assigned to check on him

tbh you’ve never been assigned because it’s always the head maid that checks on him or that one maid thats always been the head maid’s fave

but not today

it was 10 pm and you went to see if seungcheol needed anything so you go to his study room

but before you knock, you hear something from inside his study room

it sounds like crying

and you know for a fact that thats seungcheol’s voice thats crying

you were at a loss of what to do, so it took you a while to do anything, but you decided to go down and tell the chefs that he was hungry just so you could bring him his favourite food to cheer him up

when you went back to the study room, you knocked

but he didn’t answer

it was quiet now, no more sobbing

so you opened the door

and saw seungcheol with his head down on the desk

you quietly wheeled the food towards his study table and put the tray on the other desk near the couch

you carefully approached seungcheol out of curiosity

his cheeks were stained with dried tears, but other than that, he still looked as handsome as ever

you grew concerned and took of the blankets from the bigass closet near the prince’s room and draped it over him

i mean, you were already there so why not lol

the next morning, seungcheol awoke to the smell food and a blanket around him

he grew confused but shrugged it off, he expected one of the maids to do these things

but he smiled knowing someone cares

meanwhile, the head maid came up to you and told you that you’ll be the maid who’ll regularly check up on seungcheol from now on since she was, quote-on-quote, “busy”, and her favourite maid had to retire for god knows what

you didn’t know why but you felt a sense of happiness and anxiety at the same time

so in the afternoon, you go to check on seungcheol as he’s in the study room, sorting out papers

when you enter the room after knocking, seungcheol kinda stares at you

not in the bad, offending way, nah m8

but like

‘holy shit this woman looks better than a grilled cheese sandwich’

which roughly translates to “prince seungcheol is making googly-eyes at maid y/n” ty v much

and he blushed a bit but hid it well when you approached him

“good afternoon, prince seungcheol.. i am maid y/n, i’ll be the new maid who’ll check on you from time to time from now on..” you inform him

he smiles

s m i l  e s

“thank you for informing me, miss y/n,” he replied

“may i ask you a small favor?”

you were like

‘w8 boi whut-’

but you just replied with an “ok”

“please tell the maid who draped a blanket over me and brought me food last night 'thank you’, and tell her it’s from me.” he smiled

you contemplated on telling him whether or not it was you,

which would be odd for other people, since they would of cOURSE take the chance and say that they did

but you had a sense of not taking credibility in most cases bc you like being humble and shiet so you nod and telling him you’ll inform her

“thank you, it means a lot to me..” seungcheol smiles

a few months after, you hear his royal adviser, which no one rlly likes tbh (tht includes seungcheol), scolding him because he has yet to find a partner

so you go check on him in his bedroom after knocking, and he let you in

you two had, undoubtedly, grown close

which is weird bc he doesnt really make friends w/ workers in the palace, much less be best friends with them

but thats what happened

he basically tells you everything from his dreams, to when his father passed, to how his cat scratched the curtain of the theatre room and etc.

so naturally, you started liking him

but of course, why’d the prince like a maid like you????

yall were just best friends

(like any other ff pfft)

you sat down on his bed, a concerned look on your face as he was on the verge of tears

“whats wrong?” you asked, even if you already knew what dampened his mood

“Mr. Song is pressuring me into getting married again, but this time he told me other things..”

you watch as a tear or two falls from his eyes

its really painful to watch him cry

“its okay… you dont have to tell me if you dont want to..” you reassured seungcheol but he just shakes his head

“no.. i think you deserve to know”

and he told you about how his adviser called him a worthless prince for not being able to even court a girl, telling him that if he was this indecisive, the kingdom would fall, and other hurtful things like that

at this point, he was crying the whole waterfall somewhere in the deep woods near the kingdom

“cheol.. i’m sorry you had to endure that…”

without thinking, you gently pulled him into your arms, pulling him into a warm hug

both of you were surprised, but didn’t waver away from the hug

for a second you thought 'omf why the fu c  k did i do that’

but you just shook the thought away, telling yourself that your best friend is in emotional pain and you did that for moral support

(which wasnt the only reason but you wanted to deny the others hhh)

but seungcheol on the other hand was lo si  n g his shit

on the inside, of course

he’s like 'omg omg omg she’s hugging me mOM-’

but thats where it dawned on him

he likes you

the next day, you knocked on the door of his study room

but it was silent, just like that one night when he cried himself to sleep

so you opened the door,

but he wasnt there

you panicked a little, thinking about where on palace grounds he couldve gone to

so you checked his bedroom, the kitchen, the theatre room, the throne room, the royal gardens, everywhere

but aside from finding his cat scratching the theatre room curtains, they were all empty

you asked the head maid where he was and she answered you with a shocked expression before replying

“you mean to tell me you didn’t know he was in the neighboring kingdom, meeting up with his arranged fiancee?”

fiancee

arranged or not, it still hurt to know that he was with the woman who he was going to marry

and that was not you

the head maid gave you the day off, since seungcheol wasnt here for the day

you dressed casually, a white, plain, sleeveless dress that goes to your knees, instead of the regular, convervative, longsleeved maid uniform you were obliged to wear when you had work

you took a walk around the palace grounds, eventaully stopping when you reach the rooftop balcony

the moon was already making an appearance, the night ready to take over the sky

you stay there for the time being, finding the night sky, stars and a few blobs of clouds enticing to the human eye

moments later, you find yourself holding back tears

you let out a few stray tears drip down your cheeks as you sniff, not bothering to wipe them away

you were surprised when a blanket was wrapped around you, and a familiar pair of arms pulling into a hug

“its cold, you shouldn’t be out here at this ti- ….why are you crying?” you heard him voice out the last part in a soft whisper, contrasting his normal tone of speech like how he talked a few moments ago

“n-nothing… its dumb..” you tell him, dismissively

but he wasnt having it

“come on, i’ll listen to you.. tell me whats bothering you to the point where you’re crying..” seungcheol wiped a few of your tears away

“i’ll be fine, cheol.. and.. aren’t you supposed to be in the neighboring kingdom until tomorrow?..” you asked

“yes.. but there was no reason to stay if i rejected the marriage.”

what

w h a  t

“you- what?!” you turned to him, dumbfounded

he chuckled

“yeah, i rejected the marriage. i have my eyes on another girl..” he confessed, not breaking the eye contact you both shared

“…quite literally..” he grinned

“she was there for me through everything, comforted me at the toughest of times, and brought me food and a blanket when i fell asleep at my study room..”

so he knew

you blushed, knowing exactly what he meant

he approached you slowly, and once he had you in his field of reach, he cupped your face and pulled you closer to him

“would you…” he paused

“…marry me?”

you smiled a gentle, assuring smile

“..of course.”

and in a fit of smiles and small laughs, seungcheol kissed you

[nintxndos]

an nsfw ask meme (hide ur eyes kiddos)

I was looking through my blog and saw I answered this ask meme back in 2016 and the answers are preeetttyyyy different so I thought i would give it a go again

1. Are you a virgin? nope havent been for a hot minute now

2. Does anyone besides you know your bra/penis size? Yes ive mentioned it to my bff a few times lmfao

3. Do you know anyone who has any STDs? Yeah my fucking dad (actually it may have been an sti but still)

4. Were you married when you first lost your virginity? nope lmfao

5. Do you swear under celibacy? nah man

6. When did you first lose your virginity? If you haven't, when would you like to? ugh back in 2016 not a good time tbh

7. Have you ever gotten tricked into aphrodisiacs or alcohol for sex? nope

8. Have you walked in on someone masturbating/having sex? Yeah my parents when I was 5 amd I still remember it vividly

9. Have you ever seen someone masturbate or have sex with their permission? yes I quite enjoy it tbh

10. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex? the couch in my boyfriends parents house when everyone was home

11. If you had to chose one, would you have outdoor sex or car sex? car sex bc I dont want grass in my asshole

12. When was the age you first masturbated? Whether you knew it or not? probably 14 or 15

13. Have you ever helped someone "finish"? yes I really love it too

14. Have you ever had an erection in the past month? (clitorial counts, too) I dont know?

15. When was the last time you have had an erection? (clitorial counts, too) didnt know this was a thing tbh lmfao

16. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed? gonna take a guess and say no

17. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate) clitoral

18. What is your bra/penis size? 38DD

19. Has anyone seen your private parts other than yourself or a family member? yes

20. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus? a boys dick ayyy

21. Do you like rough sex or intimate sex better? rough sex gets me fucked UP (though intimate is nice too)

22. When was the last time you masturbated? uhhh 2 days ago maybe?

23. When was the last time you had sex? god two weeks ago and im dying i swear

24. When was the last time you watched porn? a few days ago maybe

25. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do? yes i have y first was a little blue bullet and the most recent is a vibrating dildo

26. Guys: Circumsized? not male

27. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched? thighs and neck fuckkk

28. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched? the clit baby!!

29. Girls: Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation? nope though wow good for the ladies who can

30. What color/type of underwear are you wearing? blue panties and a floral bra

31. Have you ever sent someone a picture or video of you in the nude? Did it include sexual actions? absolutely

32. Have you ever posted a picture of image of you in the nude on a website? Did it include sexual actions? nope

33. Have you ever anonymously sent/posted a picture or video of yourself in the nude? Did it include sexual actions? nope

34. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr? nope

35. When was the last time you have had a wet dream? maybe a week or so ago?

36. Which wet dream was your favorite? not sharing lmfao

37. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with? well im currently dating my best friend of 7/8 years

38. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with? yes

39. Have you ever masturbated with someone? yeah

40. Have you ever took a shower with someone that is not a family member? no :'----( I dont even wanna fuck in the shower I just want my back washed

41. Favorite sexual position? If you are a virgin, which position interests you? honestly i love missionary

42. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed? Fuck yes

43. Are you into any BDSM? god yeah

44. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why? yes because we live 3 hours away 😪😪

45. Turn on's? choking, spanking, being called names, ropes

46. Turn off's? age play is a no go

47. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy about someone? Was it about anyone other than your lover? yes i have and since we started dating absolutely not

48. Have you ever had phone sex? Video sex? Chat box sex? yes like all the time the (since he lives 3 hours away)

49. What was the weirdest thing that has ever turned you on? uhhh I cant think of anything right now tbh

50. Do you like dirty talk? oh fuck yeah

51. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation? usually quiet bc i have to but I love being loud for my boyfriend

52. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what? yeah someone came downstairs and started yelling abt something, also my bf and I were fucking on the couch and the remote fell over

53. Most embarressing sex/masturbation story? god my exs mom walked in right after I gave him a blow job and she was like "what are you kids doing?"

54. Most hilarious sex/masturbation story? bruh my bf and i were trying to fuck and we had to watch his sisters dog (like in the room) and she started trying to sniff his ass it was so fucking funny he jumped off me

55. What kind of porn do you like to watch? I dont really watch porn anymore tbh

56. First type of porn you have ever watched? (ie. lesbian, hentai, threesome) leabian for sure

57. What was the most recent type of porn you have ever watched? What category was it under? uhhh threesome I think

58. Most hilarious/stupidest porn you have ever watched? dude this man had a pizza around his dick and the chicks grandpa deadass had a heartattack and she still rode him

59. Have you ever fantasized over someone older than you? How much older? Younger? How much younger? chris evans tbh (older by a hot second)

60. Favorite sex toy (if any)? I quite like my purple dildo

61. Have you ever had to break up with/divorce someone because you weren't satisfied with their sex? nah

62. Have you ever used anything/gotten any surgeries to improve sexual performance/feel? nope and probably never will

63. If someone you knew asked for a nude image, would you do it? What about a tumblr follower? yes for my boyfriend anytime but not for any of yall sorry

64. Have you ever told someone any wet dreams/fantasies you've had about them? yes my bf is a fan of them

65. Do you like to have sex like they do in pornos? no bc I have real orgasms (finally!!!)

66. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them? yes I tell my bf and we have phone sex at least once a week

67. Are you able to be secretive when you masturbate? (like able to be quiet so no one can hear?) yeah I kinda have to

68. When was the first time you achieved orgasm? when i was 15 I was literally sitting on a closed toilet in my house bc I shared a room at the time w my sister so i had no choice

69. Is there only one way so far that you have been able to achieve orgasm? (ie. only by using toys, only from 1 positon,only from masturbating a certain way) nah I can do clitoral, clitoral/penatrative, and just penetration

70. Favorite type of oral? the kind w his tongue on my pussy?

71. Strangest sexual positon you've tried? havent really done any strange positions

72. Have you ever made up a sexual postion? not that I'm aware of

73. Girls: During sex, vaginal or anal? vaginal i fucking hate anal

74. Girls: During masturbation, clitorial, vaginal, or anal? clitoral

75. Do you like to be dominant or submissive? I love being a whiny sub

76. Have you ever masturbated to someone? yes

77. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn't there when you needed them? god yes that is why I usually masturbate

78. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them? yes and absolutely not

79. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial? yes and no

80. Have you ever had sex with someone who wasnt your partner? not while we were dating no, but ive had sex w people who arent him

81. Has any of your partners had sex with someone else? yes

82. Have you ever gotten pregnant? Were they your lover's or someone else's? nope though ive had a scare or two

83. Birth control or condoms? birth control

84. Do you ever masturbate to porn? not really anymore

85. Does anyone know you masturbate? Did you have to tell them? yes and not really?

86. Did your parents ever find out you were sexually active? yup

87. Do you have any STDs? nope

88. Have you ever masturbated to a fictonal character or celebrity? yeah when i was like 15/16

89. Have you ever had sex during "7 minutes in heaven"? nope never even played bc its lame

90. Spit or swallow? Or do you not like oral? I swallow if he cums in my mouth but i love getting it on my faceeee

91. Have you ever been rejected for sex? Have you ever rejected someone else? nope and yes

92. Do you have someone who said they are willing to take away your virginity if you havent lost it by a set age or if you just want to have a good time? no

93. Have you ever experimented with the opposite sex? yes

94. When you first lost your virginity, was it intended or spontanious? intended bc thats the only way we ever had sex unfortunately

95. Has anyone ever walked in when you were taking a shower with someone? nah

96. Did you ever tell someone once you lost your virginity? yeah I literally called my best friend (current boyfriend)

97. Does your lover know if you have masturbated? yes

98. Does your lover know that you want to have sex with them but cant? yes!! we dont live together and we are constantly horny it sucks!!!!

99. Do you like masturbation? eh

100. (Asker's ask) If i were to ask you if we could have sex, would you say yes? nope sorry

[toldentops]

so uh

there’s this dude that i’ve been talking to for a bit and he was a nice guy and all but he keeps being whiny on deviantart about getting rejected by girls and he calls girls “females” and I honestly feel uncomfortable about him?? he made a journal abt how he’s been miserable and nobody likes him and the girl he liked rejected him. deadass this was the second time he asked this same girl and she rejected him again like dude can’t you take a hint?? This dude asked a girl out, she rejected him, he made a journal about “hmm maybe I should take a break” the writes another journal about how miserableh e is because he asked the same girl out and gets rejected. Honestly what the fuck man, you expect me to feel sorry for you?? then he writes a journal about how he got a girlfriend after he talked about “getting one” like he told me he was just in a rush to have a girlfriend and that honestly bothers me bc he actually confessed to me once about liking me. It was flattering, yes, but it felt so unreal and made up. He just. acts so desperate and yknow I was skeptical about him getting a girlfriend and he told me yesterday “yeah I just want one in the future” like man I get it but that’s all it seems like you’re focused on. dude, like let love come to you don’t go asking for it. 

deadass he mentions everyone in the discord group “hey im single now” and it’s like bitch????/ it hasnt even been a week and he’s just BEGGING for attention.... and I told him “buddy why am I not surprised” like judging by the was he acts in his journals and when he talks to me, he just wants a girlfriend for the sake of having one

he just makes me uncomfortable in general because every time I get onto discord he messages me like “hewwo” or smthn and sometimes I just don’t feel like talking to him but it’s like he messages me the moment he knows I’m online...

I don’t feel sorry for him one bit. First of all, he’s got to get over rejection and not be whiny about it. He’s got to learn when to just stop. I’ll say that he’s admitted to his mistakes before about rejection but the moment he said that he had a girlfriend I just kinda was disappointed. 

deadass his deviantart page says single:looking  like buddy. come ON did you not learn anything at all??

More gripes down below, I just really wanna say everything

See the first time I ever talked to him was him asking for an art trade. He wanted an anthro milotic(which I said in my commission page that I did not do) and he asked if I did fetish art.  I don’t know why I took it in, I just felt kind of uncomfortable about it. I asked him for a mlm scrafty and eelektross couple and he OK but in the description he said male scrafty and ambiguously gendered eelektross. Now, it wasn’t much of a problem but still. I had learned later from him that he doesn’t care for mlm porn, even though he was fine with gay. Here’s the thing, I wasn’t asking for porn, and if he was ok with gay ships, then he should have been fine putting “hey look here’s some gay pokemon” in the description.

He’s also said to me multiple times about how hot lesbian porn is and I’m like “OK” but it’s so clear that he’s fetishizing them. He’s got mostly female pokemon anthro ocs in skimpy outfits and to me, that’s a red signal right there. it literally says in his deviantart “i  like to slap tits on pokemon” and I’m like, OOF....

it’s just so obvious that he fetishizes women., it’s gross.

he’s also got a foot fetish and yknow at the beginning of our conversation I was like well ok, and we both shared what turned us on and there was that mutual trust but one day he asked me to share photos of my feet and just the thought of him jacking off to my feet made me really uncomfortable. Every time I draw his characters he asks if I can show their feet. he’s also asked me to draw nsfw of his characters multiple times, Although I admit I never explicitly said “no” I always said that I was busy or whatever. I was never really against it but he’d always say u don’t have to if u don’t want to” and I’d say “yeah no i dont want to” but he’d ask again at some point like bro dont’ you know how to take a hint

there was always this uncomfortable tension in the conversation, it was always something along the lines of “hey (insert sexual thing here), and then Id be like “nah man im not up to it” and then hed be like oof ok sorry if u don’t wanna do it then u don’t have to but i’d love if you did” and it always felt like guit tripping of some sort. I don’t feel comfortable talking to him and I’d never know how to directly tell him “look I don’t wanna talk to you right now” and I didn’t want to make him feel like I hated him or didn’t care about him. but the more I interacted with him the more I began to feel skeptical of his character despite the many journals about how thankful he is about the people in his life and the apologies

idk if those apologies are good intentioned or just a tactic to guilt other people into feeling sorry for him or whatever. 

So, jump to yesterday where he announces that he was single. all trust in him and his relationship just. dropped. He DID say that the girl just wan’t ready to have a relationship so based on what he told me it’s not really his fault, but just based on the way he acted he acted more liek “hhhhhH she dumped me lemme make everyone feel bad for me Hey guys i don’t wanna talk rn but i feel horrible and  lemme just disappear” instead of “well she just wasnt ready and I understood that so we broke up” 

Buddy if you were really sad and you really loved her you wouldn’t put “single and looking” on your fucking deviantart page. That’s honestly the last straw and I’ve given up on trying to deal with him. I told him straightforward “hey buddy you need to take a break” and he said something like “now’s not the time to tell me this u made me feel worse now” tell me that’s not guilt tripping. THis event is what made me tell you this, I felt the need to address this to you, listen here buddy you need to take a break. That is the point I was trying to get to him. I told him he comes of as desperate, straight and to the point. He told me that other people have told him that too. Buddy can’t you take a hint, like, at all?? 

To be fair, he does make journals saying “oh im sorry about the way I acted and I need yalls help for recovery” and my only thought is “hey maybe if you changed the way you act then maybe this wouldn’t happen again, hence me getting pissed at his “single and looking” status.

also, he kinda just turned 18 so he’s pretty much an adult. I just feel like he shouldn’t feel inclined to have a girlfriend, and the fact that we talked about nsfw stuff at all makes me feel uncomfortable.

the time when we talked were nice, but I just don’t want to talk to him or deal with him, but I also don’t want to regret it.

If anyone wants to see him journals or our conversations, PM me because I honestly don’t know what to do rn and yknow he seems to be completely over it now

the least I can do is protect his name

[partlycharlie-archive]

gender? who is she? (they???)

chapter two: hey, uh . dad? link to prologue link to chapter one

summary: papa,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, oooOoOoo,,,,,,,,didn't MEAN to make you CRY (thaaaaank fuck i didn't!!!!!!!) word count: 1,796 warnings: coming out a/n: yeet yeet comin out bois

read on ao3

[SUNDAY; 10.21.18]

  harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

 [14:06] harry?: luna luna luna

[14:15] luna!: hello harry! what is it you wish to talk about?

[14:16] harry?: i think im gonna come out 2 dad

[14:19] luna!: oh wonderful! i wish you the best of luck, harry. do you know if you will come out to your mother, as well?

[14:20] harry?: oh shit [14:20] harry?: nah i dont think so [14:20] harry?: im a little more scared abt her than i am abt dad [14:20] harry?: idk y lol

[14:21] luna!: okay! that’s perfectly fine, harry. you only have to go to the limits that you are comfortable with! <3

[14:21] harry?: tyyy <3

 ---

 “Hey, dad?”

“Yeah? What’s up, Su?” James settles into the chair across from his daughter, who is sitting (with the worst posture ever - he really needs to start reminding her to keep her back straight, even if that’s the only part of her that’ll ever be straight) slumped over the table. As he speaks, she props her head into the palm of one hand to look him in the eye.

“Do you know what the word nonbinary means?”

He raises an eyebrow and frowns, considering. “A number that’s not a power of two?” he tries, offering a cautious smile.

She snorts with a quirk of her lips. “Close, but not quite.” She starts to pull out the pins holding her hijab together, placing them in a small bag in front of her. The layers of the scarf unravel around her face.

“It, uhm, well. It kind of means someone that doesn’t feel like a girl or a boy? I guess you could say that nonbinary people are, like, in between being a girl or a boy, even though I’m pretty sure some people don’t feel like that? Like agender people, y’know? I mean, I’m pretty sure they fall under the term of ���nonbinary’ or ‘genderqueer’ or whatever, but they don’t really have a gender? I guess? Yeah.”

She’s rambling, pulling the sleeves of her shirt down so that they wrap around her fingertips in that way she always does when she’s nervous.

Huh. She’s nervous.

He tilts his head. “That makes sense, yeah. Why bring it up? Is it part of your homework?” He can’t help but notice the way her shoulders noticeably relax when he confirms what she’s saying.

“No, but - uh. I think I might be? Nonbinary, I mean?” She curls in on herself, shoulders hunching in towards her chest as if she expects some sort of rejection. One of the layers of her hijab covers her expression.

He raises an eyebrow. “Okay, cool. What does this mean, then?” James’ tone is filled with relaxed confusion, and he watches with the tiniest of smiles as Sumaya lights up, breathing in deeply.

“Oh! Yeah, okay.” She cuts herself with a shaky hand wiping itself across her mouth. She starts fidgeting again, pulling at the strings of her scarf and rubbing the skin of her thumb and index fingers together.

“So, uh, maybe different pronouns? I can explain that to you later, hah. And- uh, I’ve been thinking about a new name, maybe? I’m not sure about it, but. Definitely a consideration.” The words fly out of her mouth like spitfire, each one landing in front of him as if she were afraid they’d burn her tongue if she didn’t speak fast enough.

“Huh. Okay. I mean - I get what pronouns are, no need to explain that, but I’m guessing you wouldn’t want to use guy pronouns-”

“He-him. That’s what you’d say.” She replies instantly; it sounds like a reflex. “Sorry.”

James smiles softly. “No need to apologize, love. He-him, okay - so you wouldn’t use that because you don’t… feel like a guy, right?”

Sumaya nods hesitantly.

“But not she-her, either, because you’re not a girl.”

Another nod.

James’ eyes flicker around the room as he considers this, and he misses the shaky breath Sumaya lets out. “Okay. So what pronouns would you use, then? Not ‘it’ or anything like that, right? Because that seems kind of, uhm. Dehumanizing.”

She laughs, just a bit, and her shoulders relax from the subconsciously hunched position they were in before. She pushes the remains of her hijab down so that they rest around her neck. “No,” she corrects with a smile. “That’s only for inanimate objects, I’m pretty sure. I would use they-them, probably.”

“Huh. That’s not… singular, though, is it? Correct me if I’m wrong, obviously, but isn’t that pronoun only used for a group of people?” She - they - laugh.

“Nah, it’s been used as a single-person pronouns since, like, the 1500’s; it just hasn’t really been recognized until recently. You can look up the timeline, it’s actually pretty cool. But, uh. Yeah.”

James scrubs his face with his hands. “Okay. It might take a little while for me to get used to it - feel free to correct me if I fuck up, pardon my French - but thanks for telling me, hun.” He smiles in a way that he hopes is reassuring, and Sumaya lets out a shuddering breath, looking vaguely like they’re about to cry.

“Whoa- whoa, what’s up, love? What’s wrong?” He leans forward in response to grasp one of Sumaya’s hands that lays, stationary, on the table. They shake their head quickly, breathing in another stuttered breath.

“No, I just. Fuck. I’m so happy, I’m sorry, I know it’s dumb, I was just so worried, god, I’m sorry, I’m just so happy,” she they ramble, using their free hand to wipe away the tears threatening to spill from their eyes.

“Aww, love, that’s okay.” He stands up, careful not to dislodge his hand from their tight grip, and walks around the table to envelop her in the tightest hug he can manage.

“I love you,” they whisper.

“I love you too.”

 ---

  harry? (SumayaPotter), luna! (LunaLovegood)

 [17:06] harry?: LUNA I DID IT OH MY GOD FUCK

[17:15] luna!: you did what, harry? [17:15] luna!: oh my goodness! congratulations, harry! i’m so proud of you, love.

[17:16] harry?: I CANT BELIEVE I DID IT SLFNEISLNFKESN FUCK [17:16] harry?: I CRIED BUT IT WAS OKAY [17:16] harry?: HES OKAY WITH IT [17:16] harry?: FUCK [17:18] harry?: fuck [17:18] harry?: hes [17:18] harry?: hes okay with it oh my god hes okay with it

[17:20] luna!: <3

  everybody but sumaya [longbottom (NevilleLongbottom), parkinson (PansyParkinson), weasley_2 (GinnyWeasley), lovegood (LunaLovegood), weasley_1 (RonWeasley)…]

 [17:22] lovegood: hello @everyone ! [17:22] lovegood: i would appreciate it if you all would send your congratulations to sumaya!

[17:23] weasley_1: for what ?

[17:23] lovegood: i’m afraid i can’t say, but rest assured the congratulations are deserved.

[17:23] zabini: bet

  blaise (BlaiseZabini), su (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] blaise: yo congrats

[17:23] su: ????? [17:23] su: 4 wht

[17:23] blaise: idk bro just congrats

[17:24] su: ok

  tinychild (GinnyWeasley), onlychild (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] tinychild: hey yo congrats on whatever just happened

[17:24] onlychild: ?????? thanks ??????????? [17:24] onlychild: wtf

[17:25] tinychild: i dont know

  ibelieveicanfly (SumayaPotter), ibelieveicantouchthesky (NevilleLongbottom)

 [17:23] ibelieveicantouchthesky: congratulations!

[17:24] ibelieveicanfly: what the FUCK [17:24] ibelieveicanfly: y r yall congratulating me ???????

[17:24] ibelieveicantouchthesky: i’m not sure, but i’m sure whatever you did was amazing.

[17:25] ibelieveicanfly: csdkjrhoewsdnck okay,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  motherfucker (HermioneGranger), bitchass (SumayaPotter)

 [17:23] motherfucker: Hey why did Luna just ask me to congratulate you

[17:25] bitchass: IT WAS HER????? [17:25] bitchass: ofc it was that sweet hoe

  luna! (LunaLovegood), harry? (SumayaPotter)

 [17:26] harry?: luna

[17:28] luna!: yes, harry?

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!! [17:28] harry?: sry forgot abt that 4 a sec

[17:28] luna!: no need to apologize, harry!

[17:28] harry?: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [17:28] harry?: okay im fine [17:28] harry?: anyway [17:29] harry?: did u ask all of our friends to congratulate me

[17:29] luna!: yes! [17:29] luna!: even if they don’t know why they are congratulating you, i thought it would still be a nice feeling to have them be proud of you. [17:29] luna!: also, it is a nice demonstration of their trust in both me and you, harry. [17:29] luna!: me, because they trusted me enough to know that i was not lying! [17:30] luna!: and you, because i’m sure most of them said something along the lines of “i’m sure whatever you did was worthy of my praise” when you inevitably asked them why they were congratulating you for seemingly no good reason!

[17:31] harry?: omg [17:31] harry?: ilysm [17:31] harry?: god ur fuckin right too jfc [17:31] harry?: u absolute blessing u [17:31] harry?: srsly tho thank you luna tht was rly nice of u

[17:31] luna!: of course! [17:32] luna!: i love you too, harry. <3

 ---

  the Tea TM [f (FredWeasley), g (GeorgeWeasley), s (SumayaPotter)]

 [17:25] f: hey broski [17:25] g: hey . hey . hey .

[17:33] s: what

[17:33] g: congrats [17:33] f: also y is everyone congratulating u

[17:34] s: oh [17:34] s: luna told them to

[17:34] g: y tho

[17:34] s: i came out to my dad

[17:34] f: ?

[17:35] s: wait shit

[17:35] g: ur gay?

[17:35] s: no [17:35] s: kinda [17:35] s: its weird [17:35] s: thats not what i told him

[17:35] f: oh [17:35] g: whatd u tell him

[17:36] s: um [17:36] s: shit okay ig im doing this

[17:38] f: no pressure [17:38] g: NOSE pressure

[17:38] s: shut up [17:40] s: do u k what nonbinary means

[17:41] f: oh bet [17:41] g: yea man [17:41] f: uk charlies trans right??

[17:43] s: w h a t

[17:43] g: ya [17:43] f: well agender rly but ye [17:43] g: we all read up on a bunch of gender stuff when he came out [17:43] f: p legit [17:43] g: u got a new name or r u sticking w su

[17:43] s: god thats so wild [17:44] s: oh uh no [17:44] s: uh [17:44] s: harry i think [17:44] s: idk

[f (FredWeasley) changed s (SumayaPotter)’s name to h] [g (GeorgeWeasley) changed h (SumayaPotter)’s name to h]

[17:44] g: goddamnit fred [17:44] f: ;)

[17:46] h: welp

[g (GeorgeWeasley) changed chat name to ‘ mlk but better’]

[17:46] g: get it [17:46] g: bc our names go fgh [17:46] g: and mlk was mlk

[17:46] h: pls stop