#i think what the rabbi is referring to here is more yirah than pachad

[jewish-privilege]

When Queen Vashti married King Ahasuerus, she, like all Persian wives, promised to love, honor and obey. Yet, when her husband commanded Vashti to dance before his drunken guests wearing only her royal crown, Vashti refused.

How did she get the idea that a wife could and should refuse to follow her husband’s instructions when they were disrespectful and stupid?

Vashti overheard a young woman named Hadassah giving advice to her much older cousin, Mordecai, a successful merchant and a leader of the Jewish community. Vashti was amazed that Mordecai would listen to and indeed follow the advice of a younger woman.

Vashti asked them about their relationship. Mordecai replied, “We are Jews, descendants of Abraham and Sarah. God told our ancestor Abraham that ‘whatever Sarah tells you to do – do as she says.’ (Genesis 21:12) Thus it is a mitzvah for Jewish husbands to follow the advice of their Jewish wives, especially concerning family and personal matters.”

Vashti asked Hadassah, “Don’t Jewish brides promise to obey their husbands?”

“Of course not,” answered Hadassah, “Jewish husbands and wives are partners who are consecrated to each other according to the rules of Moses (the Jewish religion) and the people of Israel (the Jewish community).

Jewish women never promise to obey their husbands. Jewish spouses should love and respect each other, but no one should blindly obey anyone else, even the King.”

Vashti was so impressed by what Mordecai and Hadassah had told her, that she began studying Torah with them and later with other Jewish teachers. After a year of study, Vashti decided to become Jewish.

She did not tell Ahasuerus that she had become Jewish because when she told him that she was studying the Torah, he was uninterested. Ahasuerus never paid any attention to Vashti’s opinions or ideas, relying only on his seven advisors, especially Memucan whom everyone called Haman.

Vashti had noticed how Haman often manipulated the King to increase Haman’s power. Now that she was Jewish, Vashti felt more self-confident and empowered, so she tried to warn Ahasuerus about Haman’s devious plots against people Haman thought were his rivals, and his tendency to avoid solving problems by finding scapegoats.

...Vashti was divorced and banished from Shushan, the capitol of the Persian empire to a small town in Southern Syria where she married the King of Massa, one of the local towns.

Her son Lemuel always remembered how his mother, Queen Vashti, admonished him that wine is not for kings since it impairs their judgment, and that the most important thing in life is to marry a woman of valor and respect her capabilities...

Vashti’s words were incorporated as the last chapter of the Book of Proverbs which speaks about the virtues of a strong, active Jewish wife.

The reference to a Torah of kindness being on her tongue (Proverbs 31:26) refers to the many good teachings that Vashti learned from Hadassah and that Vashti passed on to her son Lemuel.

...Why was there such widespread conversion to Judaism? The text says, “Because the pachad of the Jews fell upon them.” Pachad is usually translated as “fear.”

But why would people fear the Jews who had just recently escaped being plundered and looted? Perhaps the sudden reversal of Jewish fate filled many sensitive non-Jews with awe for the God of the Jews.

The Hebrew word pachad, also means remarkable and “awesome.” It indicates the stunning and overwhelming experience of the Divine, and the stupefying and daunting reaction sensitive mortals have to a Divine eruption.

...The commitment of converts to Judaism to the Jewish people in times of woe as well as times of wonder is why the Book of Esther explicitly states that Jews, their descendants, and all the converts who had joined themselves to the Jewish people, took upon themselves to celebrate Purim. (9:27)

...In later centuries, Vashti’s conversion to Judaism was forgotten. That she was the Jewish mother that Lemuel referred to was also forgotten. It is my honor to restore Vashti’s contribution to the Book of Proverbs.

[Read Rabbi Allen Maller’s full d’var torah.]