#i think maybe like 2 people ever bother to read these though lol so it's w/e
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on the subject of old ships DO YOU remember our old drrr ship. mikado x aoba. i still have fanarts saved somwhere i think
YEAHHHHH ofc i remember!!! also kida x mikado for me ahahaha oh man :") i still have a tender spot for these ships too......... never 4get
(also the fact that toyonaga toshiyuki voiced both mikado and yuuri is NOT lost on me lol I WONDER IF IT'S A COINCIDENCE THAT I IMPRINTED ON BOTH OF THESE CHARACTERS HMMMMM)
#i used to think my favorite VA was miyano mamoru (COINCIDENTALLY KIDA'S VA DON'T LOOK AT ME) and he's still up there#i do love that man's voice. but. b u t. after yoi i think my fav VA is tosshi for sure. he was always up there w miyano mamoru though#YEAH I TEND TO FALL IN LOVE WITH THE VOICES OF THE CHARACTERS I LOVE WHAT ABOUT IT#god i also used to really love nakamura yuuichi bc he voiced ikuto tsukiyomi in shugo chara......#still a great voice but i don't recognize him as readily#god you do NOT want to know how insane i was about ikuto. i deadass had the biggest goddamn crush on him when i was like 12-13. no joke#i used to write his name near my ankle w a ballpoint pen very night (like rewrite it so it would stay there) bcs somehow i genuinely hoped#that that would summon him into my bedroom.... like.... i would even leave my window open for him to come through#HOW RIDICULOUS IS THAT LIKE I FOR REAL 1000% HOPED THIS WOULD HAPPEN SOMEHOW. MAGICALLY.#god i love my younger self. a lovable nutjob fr#well. i said you don't want to know and then i told you anyway. oops?#i think maybe like 2 people ever bother to read these though lol so it's w/e#endoyamato#the ghost talkshow
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You're jealous but you can't do anything because you're not dating him (Part 7) - Wakatoshi Ushijima
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
Pairing: Ushijima x Fem! reader
Genre: Angst to fluff
Warnings: none, really? Reader calls him Toshi.
Requested by: @ushisrever
A/N: Can't believe I posted the last update to this more than two years ago. Has it really been that long???? The incomplete series has been bothering me for two years now lmao. Didn't think I'd ever find a fitting scenario for Ushiwaka but thanks to @dira333 helping me sound off some ideas, I was able to get that perfect "snap!" you get when you fit a puzzle piece in perfectly. Gave me enough brain juice to write this out before going back into hibernation.
Serving you some fresh, hot angst and then some lol. Enjoy the burn and then the healing. For someone who was as far removed from Ushiwaka (emotionally) as one can, writing this actually made me see him in a new light. Loved writing him. Hopefully, it stays as true to his canon nature as it can. Hopefully I don't trash this before it's out💀 but if you're reading this, it's good lol.
It feels like the entire Shiratorizawa is at the gates of the school.
"I can't believe she's coming to our school!"
"AAA I can't stop imagining how she'll look in our school uniform."
"Do you think she already has a boyfriend? Maybe I have a chance?"
"I don't know about a boyfriend but you certainly don't have a chance with her."
"Must you always be so cruel?!"
"If you think a star child actor who has made it so big in the industry is going to date a simpleton like you, you're delusional."
You sigh, annoyed, as you try to make your way through the babbling crowd. You're already late for your morning classes and you couldn't care any less about Hoshiko Nakamura. Or any celebrity for that matter.
"In fact, I don't think any boy in this school has a chance with her. Hmm... except maybe Ushiwaka? Not that he'd be interested in dating her anyway. Sometimes I feel like that guy doesn't have any emotions at all."
Your ears perk up at the Ace's name.
Wakatoshi Ushijima has become somewhat of a celebrity at school ever since he was selected for the under 19 representative for Japan in the Youth World Championship.
He was already well known as the formidable volleyball player who crushes any team that he takes on. However, his serious and stoic nature has kept most people from approaching him. Till now, at least.
The girl was right. Wakatoshi wouldn't even think about dating anyone. You seem fairly sure of that. However, the suggestion still leaves a bad taste in your mouth.
You're wrong about him not having any emotions you think as you finally break free from the crowd and sprint towards your classroom.
You've known Wakatoshi for as long as you can remember. You remember when his family moved into the house next to yours when you were just little kids. You remember watching the reserved, determined figure of the boy practicing volleyball all by himself in the nearby park. You remember going up to him and offering to play with him. Out of all these memories, the most vivid of them all was the way his eyes subtly lit up when you said you wanted to play with him.
Time has blurred into a haze since then. Even though you both went to different schools all through junior and middle school years, you both kept alive the tradition of playing volleyball together in park.
"You should come to Shiratorizawa," he had said that fateful day. You both were in the last year of middle school. It was a beautiful evening as you both walked back home from the park, the setting sun throwing hues of red and gold across the partially cloudy sky.
"That's not in my hands. I tried in middle school, remember? I want Shiratorizawa but Shiratorizawa doesn't seem to want me," you said, kicking a pebble on the road. Funny how I could say the same about you.
"That was three years ago. You have grown," he said without pause.
"We'll see. I don't want to get my hopes too high. You know just as well as I do that they give preference to athletes over normal students like me. Casual volleyball games with you are just about as sporty as I get," you said as you reached out to open the gate to your home.
You turned to say goodbye to him and found him looking at you, his expression more serious than usual.
"It's not about athleticism."
"Shiratorizawa only accepts the best. Be it volleyball or anything else. I believe you fit into that category. You should come," he says, looking straight into your eyes.
Your stomach flutters. How could he have so much faith in you? There is no doubt that he believes in you because Wakatoshi Ushijima always means what he says. Almost 5 years of knowing him had taught you that. You still found it hard to digest, though.
"I'll try my best, I promise."
"I know you will."
"Class, please give a warm welcome your new classmate, Hoshiko Nakamura!"
You can't help but gawk at her. Saying she is pretty would be a severe understatement. If she looks pretty on screen, it is nothing compared to what she looks like off screen. You look at your desk partner to see if he is thinking the same. Wakatoshi, however, seems to simply be listening to the teacher.
"Miss Nakamura, I'm sure you will have no problem settling in here. To kind of help you settle in this new environment, I was thinking of seating you next to Ushijima as I believe you two have met before at some of the national events."
The teacher might as well have thrown a bus at you and it would have felt just about the same as you do now.
Hoshiko's face lights up. "That would be great. Wakatoshi-kun has always been a delight to be with. Thank you for having me," she says and bows.
Did she just call him by his first name?
"Ah, Y/N, sorry for springing this on you so suddenly. I wanted to get a hold of you before morning class but couldn't. I hope it's not a problem," the teacher says.
You force a polite smile. "It's not a problem at all," you say and start packing your bag.
Hoshiko walks up to the desk and waits patiently for you to gather your stuff, thanking you again.
Your legs feel heavy as you take the empty seat diagonal to them in the adjacent row.
I'm panicking for no reason. They just know each other from an event. It makes sense to make her sit with a familiar and safe person, given her popularity. Yes, Wakatoshi is definitely the ideal choice in this scenario. He is not someone who would be creepy in any sense. He's also strong and intimidating so it would keep the creeps away. It's fine. It'll be fine. Nothing is going to happen between them... right?
"Wakatoshi-kun, I'm so glad I got to sit next to you," she says, smiling at him, speaking loud enough for people sitting nearby to hear.
"Actually, if I'm being honest, when I decided to come back to my hometown to complete my studies, I knew I wanted to go to Shiratorizawa immediately," she continues.
"Of course. Shiratorizawa is the best school in the prefecture. It's only natural to want to study here," Ushijima says, completely seriously.
Hoshiko blushes. "Ah... that is not what I meant... nevermind," she says, causing the guy behind them to burst into laughter.
It seems like the hollow sensation growing in your stomach is here to stay.
It has been two months since the day Hoshiko joined your school. With Ushijima going to school earlier than usual and practicing late into the night for the Inter High preliminaries, he hasn't been able to spend much time with you lately. Normally, this wouldn't have bothered you because you could see him in class everyday but with Hoshiko now taking your place, you barely get to say more than hi to him.
However, with the prelims now over and the upcoming week-long break ahead, you're hoping to get some one-on-one time with him once again. All these years with him have made him such an intrinsic part of your daily life that it feels like something big is missing when he's not around. To the world, Wakatoshi Ushijima might be a lot of things. But to you, Wakatoshi Ushijima is home. He is comfort. He is strength. He is someone that you know like the back of your own hand. He is someone that your heart always keeps coming back to. He is the only love you have ever known.
You know that he doesn't share the same feelings for you. But that doesn't stop your heart from longing for him.
The lessons for the day are over and you walk back to your class, eager to pack your bag and go home with Ushijima. You wonder if he'll want to go to the park in the evening.
"She's asking him out! She's asking him out!"
"No WAY! I am SO jealous."
A small crowd has gathered around the window and they're whispering amongst themselves as they look outside.
"Man, that Ushiwaka is so lucky! He gets to date the most beautiful girl in the entire country."
"I mean… he is in the nation's top 3 aces and an under 19 representative of Japan. Not to mention he's tall and strong and good looking. They're actually perfect for each other."
Your heart drops down to your feet.
You look out the window and find yourself looking at Hoshiko and Ushijima standing a ways away from the school building. They're in a quiet, secluded spot and Hoshiko seems to be blushing as she says something to him. You see him nod and say something in return. Hoshiko's face lights up in pure delight and even though they are at a distance, you can hear the joy in her voice.
"No way!!!! He said yes?? I thought he wasn't interested in girls!"
"Goddamn it! There goes my chance!"
You feel dizzy as you watch the two of them walk back to school together.
No. This can't be. You have always known that he doesn't like you that way. But you thought he wasn't interested in dating at all.
No. You shouldn't make any assumptions just yet. These gossip mongers are messing with your head. For all you know, he could have said yes to being in a show or something. You shouldn't despair before you hear the truth from him.
You blink back your tears and run to your class. Thankfully, it's empty. You take a few deep breaths to calm yourself and wait. Both of them soon appear in the hallway. The crowd surrounds them instantly, wanting to drown them in questions but Ushijima breaks away from them easily and walks towards the class. He comes up to you.
"Y/N. I'm sorry I won't be able to come to the park today."
It's true.
"Hoshiko and I are going to watch this new movie playing at the theatre-"
He's going on a date with her.
"Apparently it has a lot of volleyball in it-"
He's going on a date with h-
"You should join us."
Huh?
"What?"
"I figured you might like it since you play volleyball with me even though you don't play it otherwise."
What? What? What?? What is happening right now??
Ushijima patiently waits for your answer.
"Uh... Whose idea was it to go to the movie?"
"Nakamura's. Why?"
"And how did she bring up the idea?"
"Well, I was returning from the club and she asked to speak to me in private. And then she told me about the movie and if I wanted to watch it with her."
He didn't get it.
"Ah... Toshi... I'm pretty sure she was asking you out on a date."
His eyes widen with surprise.
"A... date? But she never said she had romantic feelings for me."
Could this mean...? Can I hope...?
"Well, her asking you out on the date was her way of saying it."
"I see. I didn't realise. Thank you for telling me. In that case, I should tell her my feelings for her as well."
He has feelings for her.
Your heart shatters.
You're glad that he walks out right away because you couldn't have stopped your tears from coming out even if you wanted to. You run out of the back door, desperate to get far away.
I guess I was the problem all this time. I just wasn't someone you could look at that way.
You had always known that. You had always known that he didn't feel for you the way you did. But that hadn't stopped you from falling for him. Hard. How could you have not? Eight years of knowing him... You didn't even realise when you fell for him. Loving him just came so naturally to you.
Logically, it makes sense. They make sense. She is beautiful and tall and smart. And so is he. They are the type of couple who would be featured on the cover of a magazine. Which, given their career trajectories, is bound to happen sooner or later.
But the heart doesn't care for logic and at this moment you feel like it will actually burst from the amount of pain you're feeling.
You spend the rest of the evening and the entire night crying in your room.
Morning comes and you feel worse than ever. Your head is throbbing, your nose is stuffy and your eyes are swollen. You decide to skip school. It's the last day before break anyway. Maybe this break will be good for you. It will give you some time to adjust to everything and compose yourself.
You go back to bed and sleep through the entire day.
You thought you'd feel better after getting some rest but you still feel like shit.
You drag yourself out of bed. Your entire body feels like it weighs ten times more.
Maybe a shower and some fresh air will do you good.
You head out.
No matter how much you try to think of something else, your mind keeps coming back to him. Your eyes keep searching for him. You look in the direction of his room. The curtains are open and you can see it is empty.
Of course he's not home yet. He's probably out with her again.
Even though it's barely a minute away, you feel exhausted by the time you reach the park. Thankfully, it is empty.
You sit on one of the swings and look around. Most of your memories with Ushijima are tied to this park. This is where you both have spent the majority of your last eight years together.
All the sweet memories make you tear up again.
"You didn't come to school today."
You were so lost in your head that you didn't realise when he walked up to you. You blink back your tears.
"Oh... hi. Yeah, I - I wasn't feeling very well today," you say, not meeting his eye.
"You seem upset."
He noticed.
"Oh... I'm fine. Really. It's just been a rough day. It's nothing to worry about," you say, still evading his gaze.
He sits on the swing next to you. You look to the side and see he has a volleyball in his lap.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
You quickly avert your gaze again.
"No."
"I see. Well, would you like me to distract you? Talk about something else?"
It is getting harder to keep your tears in check. You're sure your voice will crack if you speak. You just nod.
"You would've liked the movie. It wasn't as focused on volleyball as Nakamura said it would-"
Great. He's chosen the worst topic he could have talked about. You don't want to hear about his date. You need to change the topic. Quickly.
"What are you doing here?" you blurt out the one question that has been weighing on your mind ever since he came here.
"What do you mean? I came here to play volleyball with you."
"I- I mean... I thought you would spend your free time with Ho-Hoshiko from now."
"Why would I do that?"
"B- because you're d-dating her?" Your voice cracks.
"I am not dating Nakamura."
What?
"What do you mean you're not dating her? I thought you liked her. Didn't you go on a date with her yesterday?"
"I do like her. Just not romantically. And no, I went to watch the movie with Tendou. She had already bought the tickets so I bought them from her. I wanted to watch it with you but you went home. "
"But... you left to tell her your feelings for her..."
"I did. I wanted to clarify that I only feel for her as a friend. It was only thanks to you that I was able to tell her in time before I ended up hurting her unintentionally."
"I...see..."
Relief floods your heart. You suddenly feel a hundred pounds lighter. You finally gather the courage to look at him. He is looking right back at you.
"Can I ask you something?" you say, your lower lip trembling.
"Of course."
"Do you have romantic feelings for anyone?"
You instantly regret speaking up as soon as the question leaves your mouth. You know he never lies. And if he doesn't feel the same w-
"Yes. You."
You stare at him blankly.
It's subtle but his expression has changed from completely serious to something a little softer. You can't quite place what it is. Is it concern? nervousness? Adoration?
"R-really? You like me? Romantically?"
"Yes."
"Since when?"
"Ah," he rubs his chin, "I'm not sure..."
You're still having difficulty believing that any of this is real.
"You know," he continues, "After my father, you were the first person who ever wanted to play with me."
He points towards the corner of the park. "I was practicing against that wall that day when you came up to me. Do you remember?"
"Of course I remember. I can never forget that day."
"So many people have come and gone from my life but you have been with me for so long that, I guess somewhere along the way I just assumed you would stay forever. Which, I now realise, I shouldn't have."
He feels the same. He has always felt the same.
"Toshi?"
He turns to you again.
"I love you."
He breaks into a soft smile.
"I love you too."
Holyshit this was a ride. I'm glad I wrote this and I hope you guys enjoy.
Reblogs appreciated. Please do not steal or repost.
Taglist: @pinkiipeachiikeen @duckymcdoorknob @kakiwrites @ebiharachan @r0binscript I wasn't sure if you guys still want to be tagged for this series, seeing that it has been over two years so let me know if you want me to remove you from the taglist.
Check out THIS POST to know what all characters I have written for in this series.
MASTERLISTS | If you enjoy my work and want to, you can Buy me a Kofi!
#wakatoshi ushijima#ushijima wakatoshi#Haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu!!#ushijima x reader#wakatoshi x reader#ushijima wakatoshi x reader#wakatoshi ushijima x reader#ushiwaka#jealous series#ushijima headcanons#ushijima imagines#shiratorizawa#hq!!#haikyuu imagines#Ushijima x you
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hi there,
thank you so much for all the voicelines you post !! if it’s okay, can i request subaru’s ?
thank you again !
You're welcome! At some point I might go back and put in the ones I leave out because they don't appeal to me as much lol but since i always end up posting 99% of them anyway I think it's enough for most people hahaha. It's all of them now! Sorry for the delay.
I WAS GONNA OMIT ONE OR TWO BECAUSE OF SPOILERS but eh i'll just warm for like. extra spoilers. since after doing more code peeking it wasn't the spoiler i thought it was. SUBARU IS A SWEETIE THOUGH. I also read Subaru's chats which were put in the code recently and. Man this guy needs anxiety meds. I have a small guess as to what his stigma is, but we'll learn in a few days anyway.
Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)
"I'm very sorry to have kept you waiting. It's wonderful to see you again."
You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)
"It looks like there's a notice for you. I'd be happy to go pick it up for you if you've got your hands full. Oh, forgive me if I'm overstepping."
oh no he's anxious about helping--
Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)
"I really am so lucky to be surrounded by so many kind people like you."
"I never thought I'd get the chance to enjoy the lifestyle of a student until I came to Darkwick. Every day truly is fulfilling here."
it feels like subaru is like. . .the only one who actually enjoys school life here. . .or who really enjoys being here period lmao. . . .
"You think I'm always smiling? Ha ha, I hear that a lot. It just happens when I'm around all of you."
"I may be the captain, but it's just in name. I think Haku is much better suited for the job than me."
"I've been working since I was four, so people often said I was mature for my age. But the truth is, I've still got a lot to learn."
that makes two characters whose parents have essentially been keeping them from normal life and normal childhood for work reasons since they were four year olds. . . .
Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)
"I tend to just have hot water for breakfast. I know it would be better for me to eat a proper meal, but it's just so much effort."
DO WE REALLY HAVE TO START WITH "I NEED THE GHOULS TO EAT PROPER FUCKIN MEALS". . . .
Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)
"I'm sorry I'm so late. The campus is so crowded I can never manage to walk in a straight line, so it always takes me longer than I think. Silly, isn't it?"
baby you're hardly the first person i've met with anxiety about crowds. you're fine.
Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"What would I do without Haku's help? Hotarubi would be a mess without him."
Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)
"I wonder if I should apply early to take out any common artifacts I might need for this mission. I'll ask Haku what he thinks..."
Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)
"Ah! You surprised me there... I just got back from a small errand. Do you need something?"
Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"Ever since I was a child, the performing arts were my only focus. Maybe that's why people always say my mannerisms are so peculiar. It bothers you too, doesn't it?"
poor boy doesn't know how to act if he isn't acting. . .he doesn't know how to exist off-script. . .no wonder he made a deal with a demon. it's probably the first thing he's ever done for himself.
Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)
"I'd like to go to the cafeteria, but the line is always so long. I feel bad taking time to choose while people are waiting behind me. The bar of entry feels a little high."
i am once again suggesting subaru get anxiety meds. hell go to sinnostra and get some weed, i bet they sell that. i hear it can help.
Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"I'm just about to go and meet a friend. I hate to inconvenience you like this, but if it's something urgent, could you speak to Haku about it instead?"
Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)
"What am I going to do? We're supposed to be meeting up in an hour... If I cancel now, they'll hate me..."
Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)
"Whew... I'll walk you back to your house, {PC}. Oh, it's no problem at all, I assure you! I wanted some fresh air anyway."
Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)
"I have an Anomalous Ecology test coming up. It's such a fascinating subject, I couldn't help but stay up all night studying. Now I'm a little sleep-deprived."
Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)
"I'm going to stretch my legs a little. I might not have a show to practice for right now, but I need to keep putting myself through my paces. I'll get rusty otherwise."
Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"I'm sorry my phone's been making so much noise. I recently downloaded an app by mistake, and it won't stop sending me notifications..."
awww he's also technologically incompetent. . .poor guy was probably raised with such a heavy focus on his career he just. never needed a smartphone. anyone he needed to contact or who needed to contact him was probably always very close by. it sounds like he didn't even properly go to school before going to Darkwick. Somebody please take this boy on a walk. like anywhere. take him to a library. buy him a churro. can sho make churros? this is somebody who's never had any sort of normal social experience and sees how different he is and wishes it weren't the case, unlike Ritsu who assumes everyone else is like him, i think he'd like to have some more Experiences.
Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)
"... ...Oh! Hello, {PC}—I didn't even notice you there. My mind was somewhere else."
Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)
"Good morning! Sorry? My hair's messy? You're right, it's sticking right up at the front... That's embarrassing. I'll fix it right away."
Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)
"I usually have lunch in the dormitory. I do eat on the terrace with Lyca every now and then, but he seems so busy these days..."
Lyca is one of the members of Obscuary, btw! Seems like he and Subaru are friends.
Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)
"I didn't take you for a night owl, {PC}. Since you're here, I suppose I'll stay up a little longer. You're sure you're okay? You're not sleepy?"
Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)
"Do you visit Sinostra very often, {PC}? I see... Oh, no reason. I was just making conversation. Ha ha."
why do you ask that. . .a certain mafioso captain wouldn't happen to be suspicious of you would he. . .or maybe you owe them money. . .or maybe you used to be part of Sinostra and moved to Hotarubi. . . .
Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)
"It's getting late, {PC}. How about we finish this tomorrow? Thank you for keeping me company all this time."
Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)
"Oh, I couldn't ask you to come all the way to my room to wake me up—I'd feel terrible. I do very much appreciate the thought, though."
it's okay buddy jin already makes them do it, one more pit stop won't hurt.
Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)
"Oh, hello, {PC}. Sorry, I was actually just on my way out. I should be back by evening—do you mind if we speak then?"
Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"Lyca has seen my message, so why hasn't he responded to it? I hope nothing bad has happened to him..."
Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)
"Lyca will adapt well to human society, I'm sure of it. I'm so relieved that Darkwick chose to trust him. I can't thank you enough for your help."
he really likes Lyca huh? that is his dog.
Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)
"You can't sleep? Then let me tell you some stories. Legend has it that evil spirits appear once you've told a hundred. Now, what number was I up to..."
BOY IS TRYNA GET YOUR ASS HAUNTED.
Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)
"I don't want to seem like I'm testing you, I just... I get really anxious sometimes... I'm sorry. I'm being weird, aren't I?"
he's the type to ask 'are you sure you love me? are you sure you wanna be with me?' after you get married and move in together and own a house and have two kids with another on the way. he's the hyper anxious 'i'm sorry we disagreed about our favorite colors do you hate me?' friend(affectionate) I wonder though, is he apologizing for seeming like he's testing you because he's using his stigma to see what you've been up to or something. . .? Probably not lol it's more likely he just keeps asking if you like him
Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)
"There is no time like spring. Everyone seems more relaxed this time of year. It's reassuring to see."
(between 11am and 4pm)
"I have some sakura mochi. I was just about to prepare some tea to go with it—would you like to join me?"
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"They have no control over whether they bloom, and yet they get made a spectacle of nonetheless... Oh, sorry—I was talking about the cherry blossoms."
(between 8pm and 5am)
"There are many different flowers growing in Hotarubi, but I think the wisteria are my favorites. This is the best time to see them, so you should take a walk around."
Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)
"Hot today, isn't it? It's always raining in Hotarubi, so it does provide a little escape from the blazing summer sun, but... Ha ha. It is very humid, isn't it?"
(between 11am and 4pm)
"Summer makes me think of the ghost story Yotsuya Kaidan. The scene where Oiwa becomes hysterical, having realized her her face has been disfigured— incredible."
Yotsuya Kaidan is one of the best known japanese ghost stories! It's extremely violent, so read the summary at your discretion. The scene in question has Oiwa shown her reflection by her sister's boss to see that the cream she was given by a woman who was in love with her husband was actually some sort of poison that instantly scarred her face. She grabs a sword and goes to kill her, only for her to accidentally slit her own throat.
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"Hotarubi House holds regular festivals during the summer months. If you need a yukata to wear, I'd be happy to pick one out for you."
(between 8pm and 5am)
"I don't mind scary stories, but when that biwa in the tea room started playing by itself, it did make me jump a little..."
slight spoiler, although you can probably figure it out from this but. . .Zenji is a ghost. Subaru currently can't actually see him or hear his voice. . .only Haku, the pc, and, perhaps not so oddly, Towa can afair. All of his youtube content doesn't have him or his voice in it because he can't be recorded by cameras. So Subaru doesn't realize that the biwa playing on its own is actually Zenji playing the biwa.
Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)
"The air has gotten crisper, and the leaves are changing color. I know it's only natural for the seasons to shift, so why does it make my heart ache so much?"
(between 11am and 4pm)
"Oh, these? They're some chestnuts I found. I know—I should give them to Sho. I'm sure he'll be able to make something delicious with them."
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"That's another kuchikiri tea ceremony under my belt. It's an annual tradition where one cuts open a tea jar to reveal the tea that was preserved from the first harvest."
(between 8pm and 5am)
"On long autumn nights when the moon is shining beautifully in the sky, it's hard to resist taking a walk outside. Don't stay out until too late though, {PC}."
Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)
"...Oh, {PC}. Good morning... I had a hard time getting up today. It must be the cold... Ha ha. Not very captain-like, is it?"
Jin, Taiga, and Ed are all prone to not getting out of bed. and Yuri falls asleep on operating tables when he has down time. Trust me Subaru you are perfectly captain-like.
(between 11am and 4pm)
"Today, I'm going to order ingredients from one of my favorite stores so we can all make negima—tuna and scallion—hot pot together. Please, do join us."
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"It's cold out today. I was just thinking about lighting the fire. Would you like to come and warm up with me?"
oh subaru you don't even know how that sounds
(between 8pm and 5am)
"People say winter makes you want to snuggle up with someone, but I find that a good blanket does a much better job."
i agree that blankets are much easier to manage than people lol. probably warmer too.
His birthday: (February 20th)
"A present? For me? Thank you... I didn't expect you to do anything for my birthday, so I'm a little caught off guard. I really appreciate it."
Your birthday:
"Um... Happy birthday. I really hope this year will be a wonderful one for you."
New Years: (January 1st)
"Happy New Year. I hope I can depend on your guidance and support again this year."
Valentine's Day: (February 14th)
"Chocolate? Oh, It's Valentine's Day, isn't it? Does that mean these are for me...?"
nah i just wanted you to look at them. YES THEY ARE FOR YOU BBY. why would you be showing him chocolate if it wasn't for him! On any day, not just valentine's day!!
White Day: (March 14th)
"These are for you, {PC}. I put in a special order for monaka from my favorite confectioner in Ginza. They're wafers filled with bean jam—I hope you like them."
April Fool's Day: (April 1st)
"Earlier, Haku told me he was switching houses. It gave me a real shock— I'm very relieved that it wasn't true..."
i bet subaru made the most scared kicked puppy face and started apologizing for being such an awful captain and blamed himself for that haku would go to a different house and haku had to quickly explain it was just a prank for fear that subaru might burst into tears.
Halloween: (October 31st)
"Happy Halloween. I know it's nothing special, but I've prepared some treats for the occasion. Oh... But you're more than welcome to play a trick instead."
please don't trick him. april fool's day was hard enough for him.
Christmas: (December 25th)
"Merry Christmas. We already have our New Year decorations up in Hotarubi, so it has a real east-meets-west atmosphere now. I hope everyone is okay with it..."
Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)
"Everyone seems busy at the moment. Maybe I should use this opportunity to tidy the garden..."
(13 affinity and above)
"{PC}? Oh... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you. I was just worried because you were so quiet..."
Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)
"You're back... I'm so relieved. I was worried I'd done something to make you feel uncomfortable..."
this man shakes like a chihuahua 24/7. like you can taste the anxiety coming off of him. i love him. he's so pathetic(affectionate). i wanna squeeze his hand reassuringly and tell him everything's gonna be okay. i wanna hug him and pat his head. i wanna take him places so he learns more about the world outside of working. i wanna watch him do schoolwork excitedly because he's never really gone to school before and it's a new and exciting experience. i want him to experience the most mundane aspects of life with wonder.
good boy. yeah. get him anxiety meds /nodnod
#subaru kagami#tokyo debunker#danie yells at tokyo debunker#danie yells answers#danie yells with anons#tokyo debunker spoilers#datamining cw#OKAY TIME FOR BED WHEW
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let’s do some autistic meta knight headcanons!! over explaining my interpretation of meta knight yet again wooooo
this orb has NO idea how to talk to people!!! outside of work anyway. a lot of this is partially due to upbringing (suppressing his emotions all the time) but he does not know how to express emotions, like…at all.
this goes into a few things
1. yeah talking is hard. even after figuring out what he wants to communicate he will struggle. conversation can be so overwhelming, especially under pressure. he will need time lol
2. because of that, forming connections is hard. i really don’t think meta is much for shallow relationships, and certainly not early in the timeline. which also means he has very little experience with friendship. so a lot of the relationships he did have went kinda neglected, and issues that probably could’ve been worked on by talking became…*cough romk* escalated.
3. honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if meta convinced himself he couldn’t feel emotion (anymore) until like. katam-ish. he tried very hard lol
vulnerability is terrifying. (though this gesture here is also just comforting, like his little cape cocoon thing he does.)
unmasking—yeah im taking the mask thing very literally here—is a big deal and a very slow process for mk. i’m sure he has a lot of feelings on that lol. it served as a way to ensure no one could ever, y’know, see him.
i can’t say i think he’d ever fully ditch it—there’s always gonna be some days that are more stressful than others and if having it could help him get through it, it just makes sense. mainly when working.
it really is about vulnerability. granted, i don’t think he has the most expressive face (in my head every astral just tends to stare at things) but i doubt he has much control over it. can’t fake a smile but also can’t hide it. probably blushes easy because yeah, astrals; just look at kirby’s face.
just the idea that someone might be able to read his expression and know what he’s feeling before he’s ready for them to (or even understands it himself…) yeah he doesn’t want that
but emotional turmoil aside, i think his mask also hides a lot of his stims
remember that whole “suppressing your feelings” thing? yeah turns out that ignoring half your instincts isn’t a good idea. so in true meta knight style, he tries to stim as subtly as possible
1. he has the least control over his wings, so they will flick and twitch on their own. they’re usually a good indicator of how he’s feeling, not unlike the body language usually seen in cat ears and tails lol. flapping is also an extension of this of course, though he probably suppresses it more.
2. this also effects when he takes his wings out. pretty much every time he’s excited or nervous it just happens. kinda makes me wonder if his wing cape ordeal might also go into the suppression thing… (i’d say yes, but using a cape is also very comforting so it’s not necessarily a bad thing)
3. going back to the mask thing; he stims a lot underneath it. think like biting or pursing your lips. he bites his tongue and clicks his mouth. that sort of thing. his mask also makes it harder to notice that he is constantly sighing, humming, grumbling…all that
one nice thing about the mask though is that it helps a little bit with lights!!! woo
(look at him and his magically floating glasses)
sensory stuff—i think he’s mostly bothered by light and sound. maybe a bit of texture. he’s pretty sensory avoidant and perfectly happy standing off to the side not touching anything.
the one exception to this is physical affection, which is, despite all of this, most of how he shows affection. it’s a lot easier to hug someone than to try to explain your feelings for them, after all.
i think he would like pressure though. so that’s probably part of it. and i’m pretty sure there’s some connection in here to fighting (dang, is that the only way he knows how to get his energy out?)
anyway, pretty much all of this is in contrast to kirby, who i would gladly nominate as the champion of Doing Whatever He Wants. he might pick up a few bad habits, but he will never mask the way meta knight does. he might not understand how he feels, but he’s in tune enough to express it…usually.
this is a very good thing for meta because it helps him to do the same thing. kirby’s so energetic, it’s hard to not want to stim with him. it reminds meta to be kinder to himself and explore his own emotions. he can also help kirby understand themselves, so this connection is very important.
yeah, at the end of the day, everything kinda just boils down to kirby and mk as parallels
this is the conclusion i promise
to me, meta’s arc is about growing stronger by growing kinder, and this is mostly by learning to be kind to himself. letting himself be a person again, loving and understanding other people, and eventually, letting go of all the expectations placed on him and doing the things he’s always wanted to do…
autism headcanons are fun for me because it’s cathartic to write, but at the same time, it just makes sense in this sort of narrative. meta is, to me, inseparable from these things. and so is kirby! that’s a dynamic that’s a lot of fun to play with, and it’s at the heart of my kirby interpretation.
if you actually read all this WOW thank you
#i almost considered not posting this on a wednesday but then i wrote everything and uhhh yeah i think i gotta so#happy cringe day wednesday#for as many notes as i have on these characters i really don’t talk about it much#but meta knight is a special case because i am terrible at subtlety and he wouldn’t be meta knight without it#so this is to contextualize some things#because of what ill have in the next few days haha#basically these are just things i consider when writing meta#but a lot of it is subtextual and i dont know how well it comes across#kirbyposting#kirby#meta knight#headcanons#autism headcanon#this is practically an essay lol oops#i have like 2/3 of a fic that explores most of this in a way i probably won’t do again#but we’ll see if i ever finish it#god kirby concepts are so fun to chew on#i overthink everything i make so much lol
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1-7, 14-21 and 28-35
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gonna combine all of these, dears!
1. Who is the better cook?
Leland. Sometimes, Adrian doesn't quite manage to get the food ready on time. he doesn't like some spices and if he does like some, he only adds those lol. if one side is slightly burnt they'll go hungry xD.
2. Who gets up to cook at 2am?
Maybe Adrian?? maybe meal prep 🤔. Leland wouldn't wake up cook at 2am even if you held him at gunpoint lol.
3. Are they into PDA? Who initiates most?
Not particularly into PDA but they don't avoid it. I think they both have times where they initiate it but most likely Leland who initiates it. Adrian never stops blushing whenever he holds his hand in public and kisses his cheek grateful years later.
4. Their favorite show to watch together?
@s-misaki said cooking shows! and i went :0 gasp, agreed. Hell's Kitchen to be specific (it started airing in 2005). plus, i think Leland would love it and then Adrian would get drawn into it.
They could also watch Deal or No Deal + Who wants to Be A Billionaire :D. I think Adrian would love those shows.
5. Who is the cheesier one of the two?
Leland. He is so cheesy. But Adrian is cheesy too. All those cheesy apology cards, birthday cards, valentine cards 😭😭💕.
6. Who is always, always running late?
Leland. Comes with the job. He hates when he is cause he knows Adrian gets all nervous and likes people to be punctual. he makes up for it, though.
7. Who's clumsier?
Adrian. It's the anxiety 😔✊️.
14. Who falls asleep during a movie?
Both of them xD. i don't think they watch movies together very often cause they're tired. and when they do, they're so comfortable they fall asleep against the other.
15. Who's the first to cry during movies that don't seem sad?
Adrian. He can find the smallest thing and make it absolutely morbid...
16. Who hogs the covers?
Adrian. They each have their own covers though, honestly. Leland spends too many nights grumbling about having ¼ of the covers xD.
17. Who is more competitive?
They're both competitive but Leland has the streak more than Adrian does. Adrian does win a couple of times though.
Don't ever ask them to play scrabble.
19. What do they fight about most often? (Alternative: what was their biggest fight?)
Oh this is loaded xD. I don't think they fight often. i think Leland has learnt that it's best to confront issues there and then - and since it's Adrian, he does.
i think they'd bicker and maybe get a bit irritated eg: when Adrian keeps tidying up Leland's office. Leland has his own system and he likes his office the way it is. it's his space.
Adrian would probably grumble about a few things like keeping the house clean and the carpet nicely vacuumed.
the biggest argument they might have is Adrian putting himself in harm's way during a case or Leland taking on too many cases all at once and thinking he can do it all on his own.
the biggest argument they HAVE had was definitely about Linda -> i think after that episode they took a while to get back to the usual flow.
20. Who randomly brings home a stray puppy/kitten to adopt?
Adrian rarely does. Leland would only do so once in a while. Because he kept feeding this little kitten on the way home... I like to think they eventually get a dog :3c.
21. Any routines one has that the other had to get used to (ex. morning, nighttime, sleeping habits)?
Leland has more nighttime routines than daytime. He likes to come home, occasionally have a beer which Adrian takes to restocking on often. before bed, he likes to read a book - he does so in the sitting room because he doesn't want to bother Adrian in the bedroom.
😂 there's a lot of routines Leland has to get used to for Adrian. garbage day, cleaning day, laundry day...
@s-misaki also suggested the days/times Adrian gets all the fire alarms in his house rechecked and re-installed xD.
28. Who always steals the other's food? How does their partner react to it?
Hm. I think Adrian might steal Leland's food - maybe some parts of Leland's food is perfectly done more than his. Maybe he just didn't feel like ordering and now that Leland is eating in front of him NOW HE'S FEELING PECKISH.
30. Pet names? Yes or no?
Leland for Adrian? yes.
Adrian for Leland? yes and no?
i've tried out 'dove' for Adrian a few times. i think it works best. i think honey could also work, ha. Adrian would probably call Leland -> 'Lee' :D.
31. How do they spend their anniversary?
Probably doing or going somewhere simple. if they go on a vacation its to somewhere they can both enjoy and offers things they both like. they just want to spend time together. without having to worry or think about a case.
maybe they go to the theatre. or they go out for dinner or Leland claims his free days and they stay home and enjoy each other's company and time.
32. Who's so affectionate they can't stop touching the other?
Both of them. They are both affectionate and affection seeking men.
Leland just doesn't hesitate to take it and reach for it. Adrian does, he sometimes takes it slowly because he isn't sure or he's thinking about something but eventually it becomes pretty natural.
They love leaning against each other. They're in each other's space often. Reaching and holding and pulling and- ahhhhhh.
another friend of mine said that Leland definitely has tiny cues as well -> grabbing a cuff, hand on his shoulder. it means a lot more than you'd think :3c.
33. What is their wedding day like?
quiet. small. just a few people. people they love; close family and friends. they cry at their vows. sure, Adrian cries more because he's finally in love again. but Leland cries too because he can love Adrian in all the ways and spend the time they have left
(╥_╥) oh.
34. How do they cheer the other one up during sad times?
Adrian plays a few songs Leland likes in the background. He records shows and games Leland misses. He pops over to the office with lunch or to get him to take breaks.
Leland talks to him. Lets him know he's always there to listen. He buys him these silly cleaning supplies even though Adrian has them. He keeps this little rock collection that he occasionally gives Adrian some of.
35. What are their tastes in music?
Adrian is definitely a classical music guy and occasionally soft jazz plus country. Leland is classic rock and roll :D!
#anon asks#otp game!!#sorry it took so long i wasnt feeling well ;-;#stottlemonk#i loved all of these
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Remains of Spring - Chapter 2
Part 2/?
I lied!
This is my last contribution for @tamlinweek, lol.
As always, biggest thanks to the loml @cauldronblssd for being the best cheerleader, beta reader, and friend ever.
This Chapter occurs sequentially after Chapter 7 of Hope of Spring.
To begin with Hope of Spring and read sequentially, start here!
Tamlin pretended to paint the silver Penny chose across the walls of the study, but really, he was spending his time stealing glances at Penny every chance he got.
He had put off cleaning this room for years, even telling the staff not to bother. When Feyre had left with Lucien, he’d torn this room to shreds and sat in the dark in anguish for days. Before things had entirely fallen apart, this room had already symbolized all they had lost–Feyre’s paintings hanging on the walls to mock him. Now, though, it was time to move on.
Penny had been wonderful, helping him clear the room out, clean it, and organize the remainders. She’d washed the walls with the staff, assisted with repairing the furniture, and then picked out this lovely, bright paint for the walls. Tamlin was so astonished at how far above and beyond she always went; it left him reeling that she was just a genuinely good person, always looking for the ways that she could help. Tamlin honestly didn’t know if anyone had ever cared for him at a base level the way that Penny did, other than perhaps his mother, or maybe Lucien, but definitely never someone who wasn’t under obligation to do so.
More than that, she made him laugh. He honestly couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed as much as he had in the past few weeks. She was so incredibly funny–her sense of humor as grating and brash as it was humorous.
“You see, I know you’re a shapeshifter already, so I only ask because I am genuinely curious.”
“You’re a smart ass, is what you are, Penny.”
“Listen, I think that you would be a simply wonderful puppy. I could carry you around, give you treats so you learn to stop acting like such a dumbass when you’re cranky.” He glared at her, but the amusement kept him from avoiding the smile blooming on his face.
“Careful, or I am going to pick you up and start carrying you around when you tick me off.” He pointed the brush at her accusingly.
“You can’t just remove me, Tamlin. You’re stuck with me harassing you endlessly, that’s the deal. I don’t make the rules.” He sighed audibly, but his mind focused in on her word ‘endlessly’.
Gods, I hope so.
He was so dazed by her throwaway comment that he didn’t notice when he accidentally bumped into her while dipping his brush. She stumbled over her own feet and landed, back first, against the wet wall. He couldn’t stifle the laugh that bubbled up through him at the shock on her face.
Her eyes had gone wide, her nose scrunching immediately when she saw his laugh.
She’s so beautiful.
“Tamlin. Did you just get paint all over my back and hair?” Her voice was so low and calm, meant to be threatening, but it sent his stomach flipping over with the timbre of it.
“Of course not, my lady. It would appear you got paint all over your back and hair.” He couldn’t help but tease her. The banter between them had become so natural–so second nature to him–had it ever been that way with Feyre?
Feyre had never been a friend.
He couldn’t hold his laugh anymore. “Truly, silver is a wonderful color on you. Really brings out your ey–” Before he could finish, he felt the cold slop of the paint across his entire face. She’d painted him, the High Lord of Spring, who people still feared to look directly at, and she was now giggling. He felt the joy bubbling within him as he raised his hand to wipe his eyes.
If she wanted to play, he would play.
She cackled, running out of the room, but he was already on her heels. The part of him controlled by that deep, endless fae magic loved this chase, couldn’t stop his heart from nearly thundering through his chest as he chased her through the halls and to the stairs. She was amazingly fast, honestly far faster than he’d imagined, but it only made this more fun. She was sunshine personified–a bright ray of charm, and cheer, and revelry in a life that had been so sorely lacking for so long.
He was closing in, and her shrieking laugh pushed him to close the final gap as they descended the stairs, pulling her by the waist back into him in a move that felt more possessive than he intended. Suddenly, she was all he could smell, all he could see, feel, touch her, taste her, claim her.
He leaned in to whisper without thinking “caught you”, and he heard her sharp intake of breath–the racing of her pulse echoing his own. She smelled like sage and spearmint, still, but now with something so undeniably Spring…
But Tamlin scented someone else and drew up abruptly, those predatory instincts snapping him to attention as he realized they were no longer alone. He’d recognize that scent anywhere, and it made him bristle. Lucien. He was standing in the foyer, shock painting his face as he tried to collect himself, as Tamlin remembered he was covered in paint and cradling a stranger.
“Tamlin,” Lucien said cautiously, and even his voice sent waves of rage through him.
Traitor.
Tamin swiped over his face with his sleeve to remove the paint, the magic of the moment gone as every nerve ending sizzled with fury.
Had Rhysand truly no shame? Could he not simply leave him be? He’d done everything they’d pushed him to do, and now his reward was supposed to be never having to see or deal with any of them ever again.
“Why are you here, Lucien?” He hated how his voice, meant to be authoritative, still shook with the tension of betrayal. Hated that Lucien was here. Hated that he’d always known him as funny, smart, and kind, and now only knew him as his enemy.
“Rhys sent me. He got your letter.”
The letter. The fucking letter he’d all but begged her not to send.
He’d forgotten in the last few weeks. They’d been getting to know each other, becoming friends, and he’d forgotten all about that fight on the first day. He would pay for it now.
“I don’t know what you could possibly be referring to,” he gritted out between clenched teeth. “Now, I must ask that you leave my court. Certainly, you remember how.” He hated the hurt that reflected in Lucien’s eyes at the comment, hated how he could only lash out, could only hurt others.
“Feyre recognized the smell of Spring on the letter. Your scent, among others. We know it came from you, from the manor. I assume the letter came from you.” He looked at Penny, then seemed to second guess. For a second, Tamin thought he could sense anger flowing off Penny, but before it formed fully, she was stepping forward to introduce herself. She awkwardly shook his hand, and Tamlin was in awe of how she directed the conversation, making the typically unshakable Lucien seem flustered.
“Hello, Penny. It’s wonderful to make your acquaintance. How do you find yourself here in Spring?” That rage again from Penny, but Tamlin only heard the barb in the words. The accusation.
“She is my guest.” He could feel the talons threatening to burst through his skin. All that work in the last few years, and for what? He still couldn’t control himself. He wanted to scream, cry, rage. He had to remove himself from the situation before he escalated it. If they chose to continue only seeing him as the beast, then that’s what they could have. “I want you out of my house, Lucien. Now.”
Penny spoke up, but he could hardly hear it. “...so, you may tell Rhysand that Tamlin’s guest is here of her own free will, and not a hostage of any sort.”
Was she defending him?
“My lady, I did not mean to imply–” She was standing up for him. But he could already feel the change coming. His veins sizzled with the magic, tasting his beast form and starting to force the transition.
“I am here of my own accord, and here I will stay as long as Tamlin will allow me to.”
She would stay. She wanted to stay.
“You know I will have to inform Rhysand of what I’ve seen here, right?” It was the last thing he needed to hear, and the magic roared within him, barely contained. He hated himself–hated this lack of control. He would never be someone worthy of her. What had he been thinking? He would always be this monster–this horror that they all expected him to be. He had moments at best.
“I told you I didn’t want to send the letter.” He gritted out, then turned back to Lucien. “I won’t tell you again to get out.”
Then he all but ran out of the doors, the beast within him taking over and pulling him to escape into the dark forest amongst the vicious creatures where he belonged.
___________________
He’d roamed the forest for hours, running until he was breathless and exhausted. He had let all the horrid thoughts run through him over and over.
Monster. Traitor. Failure.
The thoughts pounded through his mind like a mantra as he ran and ran and ran. He could never be worthy of someone to love him, to care for him in any way. He’d driven Feyre away all on his own, failure by failure. Lucien, too. They’d both betrayed and left him, but he’d made them do it. He was every bit the monster they painted him to be. All that work and grief and processing and self-reflection meant nothing at the end of the day. He couldn’t even control his shifting, something that a youngling should have been able to do.
Panting and burned out, he shifted back to his fae form and dropped to the ground, letting his chest rise and fall on the forest floor as he watched the stars emerge.
But she said she wanted to stay.
The voice whispered from somewhere deep inside him. She had. She’d told Lucien that.
He groaned and rubbed his eyes, feeling the leftover magic swim in his veins. The Spring magic liked her, for whatever reason, humming wildly whenever she was nearby. He knew that she was powerful, but she seemed eternally unaware. His magic, however, recognized that vibration within her and always responded like it wanted to play. He didn’t know, truly, what he felt for her.
At first, it had been nice just to have someone to talk to. When she’d put him in his place without a lick of fear her first day here, he’d been entranced by her. She was so brave, so honest. He couldn’t remember the last time someone hadn’t feared him, or hated him, but just treated him as an equal. Every day, he found himself so thankful she was here, so grateful that she had stayed. And to hear her say how much she wanted to stay was like feeling the manor had spun around him.
And he’d Ieft. He sighed, the familiar disappointment and shame welling inside him.
Why was he so incapable of just doing the right things?
He had been trying to get away–trying to keep them from seeing him erupt–but in the end, he’d left her there. She was probably furious with him; who knew if she even did still want to stay? He sat up, pushing up from the ground. He needed to get home to her and apologize. She didn’t deserve this. If she wanted to stay, she deserved someone who would stay, too.
He walked as he formed a plan. He’d go back, maybe get some flowers from the garden and some sweets from the kitchen, knock on her door, and tell her how sorry he was for leaving. He’d tell her he was working on it, and that he would do better. That he wanted her here, wanted her to stay, and that he wouldn’t leave her again. He cleared the treeline, tripping over brambles and staggering towards the house as he tried to calm his nerves.
“Tamlin?” He was shocked to hear her familiar voice call out across the grass. In the twilight, he could see her running across the yard to him, and his heart leapt into his throat.
She was here. And she’d been waiting for him.
She halted just feet away from him, so close that her abrupt stop caused her scent to swell forward and cloud around him, almost bringing him to his knees.
“Penny.” Her name came out as a whisper on his breath. He took a step forward.
“Yes?”
“I am so sorry. I am so sorry I left.”
“No. Tamlin, I’m sorry. I put you in such a shit position. I should have listened to you.”
She was sorry?
“I shouldn’t have left. You had every right to write to them. You have every right to everything. I would never stop you. I would never hold you back. You know that, right?” He would never make those mistakes again. He would never force someone’s hand when it came to choices, or their affections. If it wasn’t freely given, he didn’t want it. He hated the sting of tears that burned at his eyes at the admission. He so badly wanted to reach for her, to feel her hands in his, but he had to let her be the one to choose.
“I know, Tam. I know. It’s alright.”
Tam.
She’d called him Tam, in her voice like bells. "I am here because I want to be. I am here with you.” She grasped his hands in hers, bringing him closer, allowing her to embrace him, and just in time, because he felt like he might actually fall to his knees in front of her. She’d pressed her beautiful face to his chest, his heart beating right in her ear.
Could she hear how it was racing?
“Are you hungry? I was having a picnic.”
“Sure, Penny. Show me to your picnic.” He couldn’t let go of her hand now that she’d offered it. He wanted to feel the solid warmth of it in his forever.
She led him to the garden gazebo, a little dinner set out around her with enough food for two.
Had she known he would come back? Had she just been waiting for him the way he had been waiting on her?
Tamlin worried about the dangerous hope that bloomed in his chest as he sat next to her in the gazebo under the stars, feeling that hum in his veins call out for hers like it was calling for home.
#acotar x oc#acotar#a court of thorns and roses au#a court of thorns and roses#hope of spring#tamlin oc#tamlin x oc#remains of spring#tamlin week 2024
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Hey! Just a heads up, I'm sending this to multiple people, since I wanna get as many different viewpoints on this as I can. I hope this doesn't bother you. Also, this is pretty long.
So, I have a question about gamedev, but more on the marketing/presence side.
Most gamedevs I know, even hobbyist ones, keep their accounts relatively professional. Sure, they may shitpost here and there, but it's mostly in relation to their games, the gamedev sphere in general, or very general inoffensive stuff. And, most importantly, I've seldom seen my favorite gamedevs (or any of my favorite internet personalities, for that matter) comment on random videos unrelated to what type of content they usually post.
All of my social media accounts are quite unprofessional. I've also had them for a long time, so there are a few things on my digital footprint that I'd rather people not see. I also, for lack of a better way of explaining, watch and read random shit and like to leave comments on it sometimes.
I feel like, I were to become a gamedev, I wouldn't be able to do that anymore. I'd have to treat my internet presence as its own balancing act, rather than a place for me to express myself unabashedly. I know this is working under the assumption that I would get big and that people would give a damn about me, but there is always the off chance of that happening. Of a random game you make suddenly blowing up because it hit the algorithm just right. So it's better to be prepared. And even if I don't get that big boom in popularity, I still plan to at least make games consistently enough to build a community of their own. Nothing like, huge, but I really enjoy the idea of people enjoying my work and sharing that enjoyment with others. But I don't want that to cross over into my personal life!
I know that's not an impossible feat, but I feel like it kind of destroys the purpose of the internet for me. To me, it's always been a safe space where I could express myself and easily connect with people with similar viewpoints, but I am now coming to odds with this concept as I consider how I want to become a gamedev.
There's also the side note that I don't wanna rebrand. At least not completely. I don't mind cleaning up my accounts or deleting some old ones, but I've grown very attached to being "Quamai". I can't imagine myself having any other online identity, even if there are some cringy moments attached to it.
So, do you have any advice for my situation? How did you personally go about your own online image, and what do you think is the best course of action?
Thank you in advance!
oh gosh what a question ldkjfadl
hmmmm
putting this under a cut because it got long and rambly lakdfa
for me personally i don't think i've ever made that many "right" choices when it comes to how i handle my online presence in game dev, it was mostly just me doing what seemed like the right thing to do at the time. it's also changed a lot all throughout my time as a dev
tho i guess the main thing is that i did create a whole new game dev online identity, so to speak, when i first got into game dev. this wasn't really due to any purposeful thought put into it though and was more just because 1) i didn't really have much online identity anyway at the time and 2) in the beginning i was trying to be more "professional" LOL
when i released easter, i did it without any presence at all. i had no accounts or anything. i literally just finished the game and threw it up on itch and gamejolt using the new studio name i had come up with based on an inside work joke. it wasn't until i started to get a few people talking about the game or linking to it/making vids that i was like hmmm i should have a twitter maybe LOL so like a week later i made a twitter. but i barely posted on it, it was just responding to other people. a year later when i released the 2.0 update i also made a few posts. then thought i might start using it more so started posting just a few random updates of new stuff i was trying out/working on (this was when i made my first couple of posts about early OW stuff)
but then when i shifted out of game dev again for a while, i abandoned it
it wasn't until august of 2021 that i began actively using my account again to post production updates for work on ow. but back then i was a lot more "emotionless" for lack of a better word. like i approached it in a more no-nonsense way than i do today. i also never got that much response from it either, usually lucky to get like 2 or 3 likes on stuff 🤣 over the course of that first year or so though i would change a lot in how i handled my online stuff, acting much more like myself, interacting a lot more with people, and getting increasingly more unhinged(???) LOL perhaps because i'd begun to see that being "super professional" when i'm just a little random person making a game all by myself there's no reason to be so stiff (and it's just much more fun and genuine to not be afraid to be myself and be a bit silly). over this time was also when i'd shift away from using my studio name and just taking the "carrot" identity. because i realized i didn't like people thinking about me as an impersonal studio and wanted to just be me, carrot, interacting with people, making games, and getting unhinged about my chars and stories
is this the right way to do it???? i have no idea. but perhaps since i never have any aspirations of grandeur and don't plan to be any kind of business, it's fine for me. and while it's true that i don't like to post, reblog, interact with, content unrelated to my games or other VN stuff, that's mostly because i don't want to annoy people who i know only follow me for game stuff (i worry about annoying people a lot, actually, it might be one of the core foundations for how i handle myself online LMAO). i don't have any other presence online though. once i started my game dev stuff, carrot became me, and it's all that's out there. so it's not like i need to "separate" anything. but also i'm not a very avid user of social media in general so it's not like i have an active desire to have different accounts so i can tweet about or comment on other stuff lakdjfasd i'm an old socially anxious duck who gets mentally exhausted just scrolling my feed. i don't need to spend any more time online than i already do with my game dev stuff hahaha. i do know some other devs though for instance that have private accounts on twitter just for their friends and more personal thoughts. so that's always an option too
as for what you should do in your own situation with your own online presence, i'm not really sure, as it all comes down to what you want. for me, since i didn't have much presence anyway, and because i wanted my game dev stuff to be its own thing, it made sense for me to create a new presence just for game dev (that eventually evolved into my entire self LKDJFAS). so it's hard for me to say what would be the best course of action if you already have an online presence that forms a core part of your identity that you don't want to lose. it also depends on what you want to eventually do with your games and if you see yourself really wanting to pursue it actively and make it a big part of your life. most devs that i know do have "game dev" presences for lack of a better word, where if you go to their accounts, it's just for game dev. or they create studios and studio accounts. i think no matter what you decide to do, even if you keep the name the same, it would probably be best to at least keep your game dev stuff separate, because people could potentially be put off from following an account for games but then their feed gets filled with a lot of non-game stuff from you that they don't care about
no matter what you decide to do though, i recommend being yourself no matter what. whether you keep with your same identity or craft a new game dev only one, still do what feels right for you on that account and be yourself and have fun with it!! game dev can already be such an isolating and hard experience, so creating a space where you can be silly and have fun with other devs and fun with your chars and ideas can really help so much to give you motivation and just enjoy your time creating games!!!
(sorry if this was a complete ramble that didn't even still fully answer the question; i can only speak from my own personal experiences that i went through after all and i don't really have any good or professional answers since i also have no idea what i'm doing most of the time 🤣)
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Fic Author Q&A
Tagged by @cicaklah - thanks babe! (sorry if my answers end up vague or unsatisfying, it's past midnight and i would be in bed if there wasn't a music festival currently happening outside my window - I"m not exactly at my best lol)
1. Why do you write fanfic?
It started from the desire to make fictional characters kiss, which is still a large part of why I do it, so let's go with that.
2. Which of your posted stories do you think about the most, even though the story is “finished”?
I don't really know - I tend to think about a lot of my stories pretty often after they're finished, I'm not sure that there is a specific one I fixate on. They all get a bit of time in my brain, and i tend to go and re-read stuff too.
3. If you could give yourself fic advice from when you first started writing fic, what would that advice be?
S l o w d o w n. Don't be afraid of big word counts, it'll take as many words as it takes, and rushing toward the finish line will just make the pacing suffer. Make room for the moments in between, let the story breathe.
4. What’s your relationship to fic stats?
Lately I've found that not looking at them in too much detail is better. Over the summer I found myself looking at my stats for validation, and of course, not finding it there. But the problem is in my head, not on the stats page. So they are just numbers that are there, and if I need to check something specific, then that's a useful thing to have.
5. Is there a pairing or scenario or friendship you miss writing? If so, why? If not, why not?
I've really fallen off of writing for Hitman over the past couple of years, with only one short ficlet as a recent offering. It's one of the fandoms were my muse has been fleeting, but the fandom is so wonderful that I miss being a more active participant in it.
6. What motivates you to write?
Lately I have a pretty hard time writing without having clear inspiration, so that's the most surefire motivation is just being struck by an idea that grabs me and won't let go until I get it down on the page. But that sort of inspiration is hard to come by, so I haven't been writing very much in its absence.
7. Why do you write for the fandom(s) that you write for?
In most cases it's because I have a ship I'm obsessed with, and if not that than just general love for the game (it's almost always a game, let's not kid ourselves) and the characters. It's hard for me to write for a fandom unless I'm at least a little bit unhealthily obsessed with it.
8. If you’re stuck writing a WIP, what do you do?
Normally I will take a break, and some of those breaks have turned out longer than others... I have a few unfinished wips that are an albatross around my neck, and I'm not sure how to go about finishing them.
9. What do you wish people knew about comments?
They are all an author wants! We want to hear about what you liked and why, and given the chance we would talk your ear off about our fics, so don't ever feel like you're bothering an author by commenting something nice on their fic, we are looking for that engagement and validation.
10. Maybe there’s a question you wish had been on here. What’s that question (and answer)?
What's something you've been excited about/feeling good about recently with your writing? One thing I will mention is that a few days ago I went back and read a bunch of free writing exercises I did for a class last semester that i hadn't looked at since - I had completely forgotten about most of them, but when I read them again the majority of them were so good! It kind of bolstered my confidence that I had that kind of quality output from 10-minute warmups where I wasn't thinking too hard. Like, even though I haven't written much lately, I still know how to write!!
Not tagging anyone specific, just whoever want to do it because I am too tired to think and decide :)
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
thanks so much @cha-melodius and @stereopticons for the tags! i am very late on this but also i mostly use tumblr on mobile and they make it impossible to copy & paste these things lol
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
18! it feels like it should be less though, i swear ive only written like five
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
288,090. Let's not talk about the word count of my wip folder.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Right now, Red, White and Royal Blue. I have a couple Top Gun wips I still hope to publish and I used to write for Schitt's Creek.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
I'd Swing With You for the Fences (Schitt's Creek, E, 87k; celeb/baseball AU)
Even If it's Just Pretend (RWRB, E, ongoing; exes-to-fake-dating-to-lovers canon divergence)
You and My Hometown (Schitt's Creek, E, 38k, holiday exes/fwb AU)
I'll Keep Your Brittle Heart Warm (Schitt's Creek, E, 13k, sequel oneshot to ISWYFTF)
A Simple Complication (Schitt's Creek, E, 8k, fwb singles week AU)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yep! I am behind from a couple fics but I've been responding on my current multichap and i WILL one day catch up, even if it'll be two years late.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I haven't written a single angsty ending lol
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Currently, I'd say You and My Hometown just because it's the angstiest complete fic I have and the end goes a few years ahead in their happily ever after.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Yeah sometimes. A couple backhanded compliments, too. Sometimes I wish people would just stop reading it, and if they feel like they have to finish, at least stop commenting if they're not liking it.
Also like... authors can see your public bookmarks. If you're gonna be even vaguely disparaging in there... maybe click the "private bookmark" checkbox.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I don't consider myself a smut writer, because I tend to think of smut as a separate genre, if that makes sense? I definitely write some smutty scenes, but I don't write pwp or smut for smut's sake (thank you to those of you who do, truly doing the lord's work).
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I don't, but there is a Descendants AU in my Schitt's WIP folder lmfao.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
No, thank god.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No, but that would be so lovely!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, but I have written as part of a group project where we each wrote a chapter: The Blouse Barn Divorce Ranch.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
It honestly is probably firstprince. I've been so in love with them for four years, the book truly changed my life.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
The Schitt's Creek superhero AU. When I tell you that the plot twist I had planned for that was gonna be so good... RIP.
Also my Schitt's Creek apocalypse AU that I had written the beginning and ending for and could never get the middle right ugh.
Also also my Top Gun wrong number sexting WIP.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Working in canon elements. Which, maybe I should focus on plot and characters instead if I ever want to publish original work whoops.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Descriptions. I don't visualize when I read, so I never really bother with mundane descriptions when I write. I need to remember some readers do need those details when reading, even if I don't.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I won't do it unless it's something I can run by a native speaker.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I honestly don't even know. Maybe Buffy?
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Even If it's Just Pretend. It's been such a labor of love and some of my absolute favorite lines are in it.
But also the Schitt's Creek Penelope AU, The Rumors Are Terrible and Cruel. I love Penelope so much and weaving that in with some of my favorite characters was such a blast. I wish more people had read it lol.
Okay like I said, I'm super late to this, so no idea who has done this yet. Tagging @lilythesilly, @maxbegone, @roseapothecary and @kiwiana-writes just in case any of yall haven't done it!
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HELLOOO its the one who ask about your fics again lol (sorry if I'm bothering you )
Since it's Ukyo's birthday, please tell me what make you like Ukyo as a character ( why notice him in a vast amount of people in dr stone and when did you know that you like him) have a nice day (can we please have an estimate time when you'll post a new ff - if there isn't it's fine! Please take your time!! And I AM SOOOO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT you will consider writing a sequel to Ocean Tide! I can wait for a year or 2 tbh as long as you're still writing and okay in life)
(Don’t worry about it, I love getting asks!)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE CHARACTER EVER!!
As for why I came to like Ukyou so much—it’s kind of related to writing him. Me and a friend were co-writing something for fun, and he turned into a major character. I ended up in love with writing him and his perspective.
I got attached to him because (in my interpretation of him) he is a character that values peace above all else—to the point of refusing to engage in conflict and looking for every alternative possible, which is something that can end up a flaw (backed up by his actions in Tsukasa’s Empire and to an extent in the treasure island arc). While in Tsukasa’s Empire, he never really had his allegiance questioned—something I like to attribute to his ability to keep his emotions in check and hidden behind a mask (or a smile). In that arc, his moral code gets backed into a corner. He turns a blind eye to Tsukasa shattering statues and, knowing he was horribly outmatched if he were to act out, tried (and failed) to tell himself it wasn’t equal to murder.
That kind of leads up to one of my favorite scenes in the manga: Chapter 73 and 74, when Ukyou talks to Senkuu over the phone. I feel like that scene is where Ukyou knew that his only chance at doing the right thing and succeeding, rather than opposing Tsukasa on his own and recklessly, was to hope that Senkuu was someone good. (I tend to have this in their dynamic when I write them a lot, with Senkuu being Ukyou’s hope and lifeline and confidence that they could do anything (even saving the world). And with Ukyou being Senkuu’s reassurance and the calm to his chaos.)
I think I loved Ukyou when I realized he was a character that understood the world’s darkness and was afraid—not of the darkness, but of the harsh decision between self-preservation and honoring his own beliefs and morals. He’s surprisingly realistic as a character, who keeps hoping for the best even when he falters, but can tell the difference between realistic and unrealistic expectations. (Which, when Senkuu promised, delivered, and then kept going far past the bar and the standards Ukyou held while at the same time working hard to make his goals happen, makes Ukyou feel grateful to have met Senkuu at all. He doesn’t admit it, but I like to think Ukyou felt like Senkuu saved him. And maybe that’s how Ukyou starts to fall a little bit in love with him.)
That turned into an essay, but I’ve been thinking about them for way too long and they continue to surprise me. Ukyou especially is just a character I’m forever going to be attached to. I love the entire Dr. Stone cast, but I just eat up the crumbs from the manga and anime, haha
As for when I’ll have a new fic, I can’t really give an estimate on that. I’m definitely a planner, but I’ve also been unable to write a lot lately (I’m hoping to work out a better pace with writing and work, since I’m a little bit sporadic despite all the planning I do). I’ll definitely remember to post here when I have a new fic, though! I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed reading them <3 It makes my day.
I hope you have a wonderful time, whatever part of the day it is for you! It’s a good night for me, thank you for the ask!
#dr stone#happy birthday ukyou#I’ll never get tired of putting them in situations#also every time I talk about him I end up with an essay and I will never be embarrassed about it#asks#ukyo saionji#senku ishigami
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Rules and brief about!
Welcome! This is a rp blog for ygo characters. Probably going to just stick with mostly Yami Bakura right now. But I might add others later.
Here are some general things you should know:
- I am very new to rp still. And still not super familiar with Tumblr. Still a lot of things I don't know or have never done before, so please keep this in mind
- It almost feels like my first time ever encountering ygo.
I've just picked up the manga for the 1st time about three days ago too.
- I am an adult and would prefer characters and muns to be 18+. No nsfw stuff with minors
- I really do try to read and remember everyone's rules, but sometimes I forget my own rules, so please forgive me if I forget something
- On that note, I am pretty forgetful, in general. I try to jot down notes to help with this, but there is a chance I may forget an ic interaction
- Try to give me about a week before giving me a reminder, though.
- I am VEEERY slow a lot of the time. Like, many days, maybe a week, slow. Sometimes more than a week. Not always, but just giving you a heads up.
- I try not to spam notifs or dash, but, it might happen, occasionally. I will always reblog from the source, unless the mun has made it explicitly clear that they actually prefer it be from them or don't care either way or, for some reason, I can't get to the source.
- I am kind of the exact opposite of most people, it seems. I actually would LOVE it if you went on a like spree. And I actually prefer it if you reblogged memes from me (as long as we have spoken at least once). And dash spam almost never bothers me. You can also come into my ims, that doesn't really bother me either.
- I'm not the best at # tagging stuff. I haven't really got a system going yet
- I follow #omi-nor and #ominor, but I don't look at tags very often
- Please don't be afraid to @ me for dash games, lmao. I usually love those. May not always do them, but yeah.
- I am a very heavy cell phone user, but, so far, I don't think I've run into trouble because of this. Trimming is the only big thing I have doubts about still right now.
- Rules could change. I tried my best to give some solid info here, but it could change. I'll probably make a post if there is a change?
(I really hope I'm not forgetting something because I am writing this from memory.)
- I am pretty anxious about stuff. I'm trying not to be, but it's hard.
Like, sometimes I look at a meme and there's a part of me that wants to do it, but there's also a little pang of anxiety a lot of the time. Lol, I dunno, man..
- I may not answer every ask or do everything thing. And I'm trying to get better at sometimes saying no to things. But I don't want people to get discouraged about interacting, either, lol.
I also try not to pressure other people and a lot of stuff coming from me doesn't have a whole lot of expectation attached to it. (Like, if I @ you in a dash game, for example)
- One important thing about communication: I always feel like I'm in a tug of war of trying not to talk too much to people because I'm worried I'm bothering them just a bit and then realizing I may not be talking enough, so I'm basically a stranger to them.
- "Plot something out" kinda scares me a bit, cause all the rp I've ever done - I think - was just off the cuff. Maybe it's not as scary as it sounds and maybe I've technically already plotted without knowing it. But yeah.
- I might need to take 2 or 3 weeks off from time to time. Just giving you a heads up. I'll try to say something.
- Going by Rainy for mun name. It just kinda stuck, lol.
- It's very easy for me to feel a bit overwhelmed. A part of me hates to do this, but I may need to temporarily shut down my ask box and not accept @s or #s for a bit if I feel like I have too much to do. I may need to make a very short ooc post just to let people know?
- I'm going to say, yes, all my memes have no expiration date, though.
- On a similar note, I think it's very possible I will go through your posts and send in stuff from a very long while back, in some cases. I usually assume there is no expiration date for other people's memes, but I usually try to ask first. But if there is, please feel free to ignore.
- I may or may not use icons
- If I see a reply to a thread and I am super tired, I won't read it until I've slept long enough for me to feel better (which could be a long time). I feel like being tired while reading really distorts things, so I like to only read it after I've gotten some sleep.
Honestly, the same is usually true for even ooc conversation. I just don't do well when I'm sleep deprived and sometimes I will just pass out for, like, 12 hours. (I LOVE it when this happens, though. I feel great afterwards.)
***ABOUT YAMI BAKURA***
My Yami Bakura is, right now, based off of anime English dub canon, for the most part. But now that I have the manga, it might slowly start to change a bit. Not sure.
I kinda wanted to try Ryo, but I haven't found Ryo in the English dub to be very inspiring, so far. A lot of his screen time was him just kinda flatly explaining the duels. Poor Ryo. You see glimpses of an actual character, at times, but it's rough, man.
I was debating keeping Ryo or not, but just to avoid confusion, I'm gonna wait to see what the manga has to offer.
Can I lastly just say? I really like the ygo rpc so far.
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Thanks @chaniis-atlantis for the tag!! ❤
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
currently 66 though next month I'm hoping to have time to finish transferring over the rest of my old fics from FFN
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
1,495,124
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently, Stargate Atlantis previously (deep breath): Star Wars (OT & the novels that are now called Legends [I think]), X-Men, Kiesha'ra, Valdemar, Pet Shop of Horrors, Fruits Basket, Inuyasha, Saiyuki, MCU/Avengers, Avatar: the Last Airbender, Angel the series, The Last Unicorn, Lord of the Rings, Dead Poet's Society, Homer, Gargoyles
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1- "Nemo" (SGA) 2- "Nykteridolotry" (SGA) 3- "One and One and One is Three" (MCU) 4- "Regina Donum" (SGA) 5- "Your Prison is Walking Through This World All Alone" (MCU)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yes! I've met some great people through comment discussions. 😁 Probably the only time I don't is when someone comments on multiple chapters at a time on their read-through; in those cases I tend to only respond to the comments that I find the most interesting rather than to all of them, though it depends on my mood.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Um probably "Beast of Venery" (SGA) though it is part 1 of a series that ends much more happily. Oh! I forgot about "Lie Still" (AtS)! It's a character profile of Wesley Wyndham-Price that literally no one has read (the only fic of mine at FFN that has 0 interactions). Very angsty, and probably very "in my own head" which is why no one else liked it lol.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I am an absolute sucker for happy endings, so this is like choosing... i dunno, a best flavor of ice cream. They're all happy. I might say "Ivory Fanged" (Kiesha'ra) is the "happiest"? Or maybe "One and One and One is Three" (MCU)? Just because the first involves 2 kingdoms worth of people celebrating, and the second like 5 realities/multiverses of people being (relatively) happy at the end.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not really? I do get weird comments sometimes. I got a comment on "Reunion" (IY) where the reader complained about the story being unfinished (when it was clearly marked that it was unfinished/abandoned) and that it had ruined the series to finish it on that note. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
lol. Yes. A lot. Mostly m/m, though I've occasionally branched out into m/m/m, m/m/m/m, and f/m. As far as kinks or types of smut, I honestly don't think I could remember all the scenes I've written, though I love power dynamics so I play with that a lot. And I've written both rape and incest, if by "kind" you mean the stuff that really gets people hot and bothered.
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
LMAO. Crossovers are the reason I write fic in the first place. My favorite characters meeting each other is like... the shit. The craziest one (that ever made it to being partially posted anyway) was called "Twenty-Four Hours of Midnight," and was a crossover between The Three Musketeers, Dragonheart, X-Men, and Angel the series.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I'm aware of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No. I don't think so? But that would be awesome.
13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
No, but sortof? Eos (Eos_x) did illustrations for my fic "Aubade" so we are credited as co-authors.
14. What's your all-time favourite ship?
I don't know if I can answer this. I ship whatever smashing together of my favorite characters works for me at the moment, and I have a lot of favorite characters. And do you mean to read, or to write? Conceptually, in my head? Or best execution, either in fic or canon? Because I feel like these would all be different answers for me...
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
I have a fic currently working-titled "Though Far Away, We're Still the Same" which is a multiverse John/Todd/Rodney fic. I realized I wanted to change the arc of an OC, which will require rewriting the whole thing, and I'm realistically never going to have time for that.
16. What are your writing strengths?
For 3 fandoms now I've written snarky asshole/ancient villain as a ship, and I think I've gotten pretty good at the dynamic lol. I'm pretty good at dialogue I think, and while it's a bitch to write it I'm pretty good at action (as far as making everything make sense spatially).
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Conflict. Usually I start writing a story knowing how the conflict will be resolved and then I lose all interest in it and have to keep reminding myself that the characters are still in it, they don't have resolution yet.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
Author's discretion (because you write fic for you) but in general I don't care for reading it unless it's short endearments, non-plot relevant, or well known information. (Or the meaning gets otherwise explained in the surrounding text.) I never liked it in old books where the author will just throw in lines of French or Latin and expect you to know what it means. I think it pulls the reader out of the story, so I don't recommend it unless that's your intention. If you have two characters who are speaking a foreign language to each other, fully understanding each other, you should write the dialogue in the same language as the fic (because in the reality of the fic, everything is happening in that same language, if that makes sense). Though there are definitely some concepts that don't translate well; when I was writing a lot of anime fic I experimented by having one fandom where I stripped out all the Japanese honorifics and one where I kept them in, and I feel like it gives a different vibe to the fic. I've recently been reading a lot of Mandalorian adjacent Star Wars fics and I have to say I do not care for uses of excessive amounts of Mando'a. A few endearments, concepts that are very common knowledge, fine. But whole sentences? It better not be anything I needed to know for the plot because I am not looking that up. (lol I did not expect to have such opinions on this topic 🤣)
19. First fandom you wrote for?
OT Star Wars. First posted fic was "The Secret Life of Harrison Ford." Don't read it, it's not good. (Unless you like the same high school humor that me and my high school friends did?)
20. Favourite fic you've ever written?
Technically, this is a fic that isn't posted yet, but it's 90% written so it counts... lol. It's called "Circumvolution" (SGA) and I've been writing it in the background over the last few years whenever "Regina Donum" started giving me fits, so it's very much a work of love and a story I wrote for me. It was originally conceived as the ending of the "My Name Forevermore" series, but it's done (mostly), so I've moved it to be the next big fic I post after I finish "Regina Donum."
Npt: @tiltingheartand @judgeverse @only-in-december @lord-aldhelm @anomalousrobot @ladyofparchments @anyone i missed who wants to join in
#tag game#my writing#apologizes if this comes out looking weird. tumblr's formatting and i HAD WORDS today
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no i agree with you i'm just suprised they're not even bothering with the surface level representation. i feel like they did put some effort in season 1 (which was super misguided ultimately). they did already change stuff from the books they could easily change benedict and sophie's story, although they should probably scrap the whole thing go in a different direction. the whole lead of color quota thing they've written themselves into is very bad don't get me wrong but i don't really think switching over to all white main couples is any better.
I think season 1 did make an attempt, which was bad lol, but I also think that was done with the very clear mindset that they were going to get over the hurdle of stuffy period drama perceptions and the general manner in which people look down on historical romance (historical romance is one of the most dragged subgenres these days, even other romance readers often act like they're "better" than it lmao) by going "BUT LOOK! REVOLUTIONARY! THE DUKE IS BLACK!"
And at first, that was working, largely because of Rege being Rege and owning that shit, but you then had the plot point they didn't change from the book being WORSE because of the race change, them not realizing that... The "one of them fell in love with one of us" conversation, which I remember feeling so shocked by in real time--that NOBODY caught that, NOBODY was like "oh, let's retool that line and maybe this entire concept". Which made more sense when it was revealed that the writers' rooms for that show do not reflect the diversity they claim to tout (and much of this was brushed away with "but Shonda"... And like yeah, but Shonda, because many Black critics have been scrutinizing how Shonda handles race and interracial relationships especially for YEARS, since Grey's Anatomy, and Bton is absolutely in line with those criticisms).
The issue is that it fell apart further in season 2; I mean, they cast an Indian lead and made India a huge part of her personality, scraping, by the way, a lot of her independent backstory from the book because we needed more time for white people drama, creating the most surface level read possible.
That SAID, though I suspect there was a lot of bts drama that affected the s2 final product (which I've stated a lot so I won't get into it) and made it quite different from s1... The CVD guy whose real name I now forget, imo, seemed to have more of an interest in this weird racial utopia mindset of the show. Like, not enough to get it right, by ANY means. But I'm not surprised that now that he's gone there is even less of a care for it.
I just think the entire thing is bad; it's bad that the show is so straight (and hey! You sure could do something else with Benedict there!); it's bad that the show mishandles race at every chance it gets; it's bad that the show's writing is kind of like, abysmal. The show doesn't even reconcile with the genre it claims to adapt, nor does it attempt to. Throw the whole thing in the trash.
But yeah, that's really all I've got. I think this was a poor choice to adapt, I don't think they ever had any intention to do right by their concept, and everyone should just watch Mr. Malcolm's List and move on. I'm done with it, and I don't super have any other thoughts on it besides "it's bad and it's not going to improve".
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Yeah as you said, I'm sure some of them have mental health issues which may give them a pass for the military, though I'm a bit curious how bad should it be for you to be exempt?
I personally don't think Giriboy is going to serve, I think his case is a bit similar to Simon D with the eye problems. But I'm very curious about the 92, 93 line rappers who seem like they have no thoughts on going haha
I wonder if they asked for a longer period before enlistment, cause I know some idols did that and it could be extended until they hit 30 or smth like that (not very sure how it works). I was thinking now that SK doesn't have that law that adds 1 year to their age anymore, maybe the period men can enlist has been extended as well?
The things I read said that condition has to have the (strong?) potential of declining during service. That's pretty...lenient? Cause I feel like that's anything mental health. Obviously someone's mental health is gonna decline if they know they have to leave their life behind for 2 years by force LOL. I'm sure in the official terms (I couldn't really find them, only some summaries from news sites) the rules are a bit stricter.
It must not be that lenient because Swings was able to get in with OCD, Major Depression, Bipolar, and PTSD that he's been getting treated since he was young. Like how the hell did HE make it past the screening? Was he some special mistake? Did he not initially disclose cause he didn't want to look "weak" or something? Was he able to "pass" the screenings cause he was getting adequate treatment at that time so they didn't think he was sick "enough"? Maybe they just generally took mental health less seriously back then and they've since revised the rules around mental ailments cause what the hell?
Yeah, the last anon brought up Justhis. He's the same age as Giriboy. Giriboy has already talked a bit about his mental health. I can't even recall Justhis even ever mentioning anything about enlistment.
I can't really find too much information on the specifics. Everything is probably in Korean and people haven't really bothered to translate it in detail since it doesn't really affect foreigners.
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This fireangelsstuff lady is unhinged. So is she Newbae? I remember reading that Newbae was from NZ and had a baby girl. I went to fireangelsstuff's blog after the Scammer Squad fiasco and I think I read some stuff about her losing the love of her life and living in the English countryside.
Tbh Idk how Chris manages to live knowing there's so many crazy,delusional stalkers of him out there. I remember reading last year that Newbae flew to the U.S to stalk him in MA.
Also this is before the pandemic but anyone remember this lady on twitter who'd spam him in the replies when he would tweet. The details are hazy as she disappeared after 2020 but I last remember her threatening to shoot him and that she's in MA looking for him. Most stan twitter kids made fun of her and didn't take her seriously though.
Also I remember in 2019 coming across 2 weird af videos.
One was of this lady claiming that she's Chris's twin flame and it was a lot of gibberish tbh, I was weirded out by the video and didn't bother watching it as it was pretty long. A minute was the most I could take lol.
The other one is a real doozy. I was so fucking weirded out by it and still don't know if it was a bad joke or if the lady was serious. This lady posted a video on YT claiming she was being stalked by Chris Evans. So her overall behaviour really made me wonder if she was joking but idk maybe she was doing it for attention. Like she was claiming that a recent interview he had done(the video from from mid 2019 so I'm assuming it was Avengers Endgame era) was him talking about her and giving signs, threatening her. Then the video moved on to her opening her front door and acting frantic saying she knows he was here just now as she was making this video. She looked to both sides of the hallway and then (this is part that makes me doubt it was serious lmao) picks up a DVD of Push from the hallway to show he was here and was threatening her💀💀💀
Look either that lady had severe mental illnesses or it was a joke that was executed verrrrrry badly.
Either way...….he's surrounded by so many crazy people and now I wonder if someone ever got successful enough to get close to him while concealing their crazy ass💀
Sorry for the longass rant mod but this shit's bananas and I just needed to let it out🤣
The video you’re talking about sounds exactly like Fireangelsstuff
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CORYNN HI
belated merry christmas if u celebrate!!! wow im so late but let's pretend im not 🙂
i hope that you're doing well and enjoying the rest of this year!
also a question that has been on my mind lately, what is the inspiration of your username? i'd guess it's because of that book, 6 of crows? maybe i got the title wrong woops hehe but yeah!! feel free to explain it or not :) and also, if you'd like to, recommend us some books!! i'm not a native english speaker so i'm looking for a few books to read in english :^)
take care of yourself! and have a good day <3
so I had just finished typing a giant response to this when my laptop died and deleted the whole thing💀 so here we are for round two.
if you were late for christmas wishes, then I am like, horribly horribly late. so instead.. happy new year! hope it treats you well ash <3
as for my username, yes it is inspired by six of crows hehe. I made this account way back in 2017 and didn't rlly use it, but when I came back to write fanfic I thought it was kinda cool and kept it even though the blog has nothing to do with the series lol.
but as for book recs, ofc I have some! admittedly I haven't read much in the last year or two, so some of these I read a while ago and am not sure if they still live up to how much I loved them years ago, but I figured i'd include them anyway:
all time favs:
the secret history by donna tartt: this is like, my all time favourite book, when people ask this is what i say. it's the only book i've bothered to read twice. admittedly I know it isn't for everyone, as it's highly satirical and slow-paced, but if you're alright with that I can't recommend it enough. i'm low-key an avid hater of first person narration 99% of the time, but richard's perspective in this book is so deliciously horrible I can't help but love it. honestly i could talk about it forever. highly recommend.
the way of kings by brandon sanderson. this book is literally everything I could ever hope to achieve with my writing. so complex. such amazing characters and development. insane world building. and so massive. it's like 1200 pages, and there's four more with the same amount that are already out, of what will become ten. it is a commitment, but I think it's so worth it (I'm currently almost done book 2, and will be immediately picking up book 3). if you like fantasy this is my number one rec.
the grishaverse by leigh bardugo. given my username i'm sure this isn't a surprise lolol. this series includes some of my favourite characters across any form of media. it includes the shadow and bone trilogy, the six of crows duology, and the king of scars duology. personally while I think the shadow and bone trilogy is the weakest instalment (mostly bc I don't like first person narrative) it's where I would start. fun story, great cast, and a good way to settle into the world. they're also YA so they read pretty easy.
some other books/series I recommend (with variety for your reading preferences):
an ember in the ashes quartet by sabaa tahir
the raven cycle by maggie stiefvater
1984 by george orwell
turtles all the way down by john green
they both die at the end by adam silvera
the troop by nick cutter
illuminae by jay kristoff and amie kaufman.
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