#i think last time the M was mothers talk tears for fears so we got mustapha this time

[mhaccunoval]

@jaybirdsdelight tagged me in the spelling urls with songs game!!!

(M)ustapha — Queen

(H)old Me Like a Grudge — Fall Out Boy

(A)ll Mixed Up — 311

(C)ome in Closer — Blue October

(C)leopatra — The Lumineers

(U)nderground – Adam Lambert

(N)ever Do Anything — Barenaked Ladies

(O)restes — A Perfect Circle

(V)icarious — Tool

(A)llison Road — Gin Blossoms

(L)ook at Your Hands — George Michael

💞 being evil and tagging people for once: @alonetogether @butchybats @breadboylovin  @corvusossifragus 💞

[guess-my-next-obsession]

The Stable Girl: Finale

pairing: joel miller x f!reader (Sunshine)

chapter rating: M (mild descriptions of gore, death, grief, depression, a happy ending of course)

word count: 3.3k

a/n: oh my goodness! what a fun time it’s been writing this story. this was my first joel work i’ve created so it’ll always hold a special place in my heart, but i’m so so so excited for all the Joel content to come in the new year. thank you so much for the love on this story and all my stories. you make my world brighter. i love you all!

series masterlist

Over the last forty or so years of his life, Joel Miller had become quite close acquaintances with death. It was the most sure thing he ever knew—until he rode into Jackson and met you.

His first meeting with death was when he was ten. Butch, Joel’s childhood shepherd, had been adopted by his parents only weeks before his birth, allowing the pair to grow up together, in a way. The two were thick as thieves. Wherever Joel went, Butch was sure to follow, leading his parents to nickname their son “Sundance”—an ode to Joel’s favorite Western.

“Butch and Sundance were at it again,” his mother would lament after the duo would return from an afternoon of playing outside covered in dirt and scrapes. “Boys’ll be boys,” his father would respond, no doubt flipping back in time to relive his own memories from boyhood.

When Butch got sick, it tore Joel to pieces. On one hand, it was a fast death—Butch passing in his sleep as Joel held onto him for dear life, his tears falling onto the pup’s fur.

But while the death was quick, the grieving was anything but.

Joel didn’t go outside to play for at least six months afterwards, choosing to shut himself away in his bedroom and practice his guitar instead. It took nearly a year until he resembled the boy his parents knew and missed, but even then, for the rest of his life, whenever he saw a dog, all he could see was Butch.

His next meeting with death was shocking and sudden, his heart and mind taking weeks to accept that the event truly happened.

When Joel was twenty-one, Sarah was four, and Tommy was eighteen, his parents passed away in a car accident—another quick death that was followed by insurmountable grief. This time, Joel was too busy being a father and an older brother to process anything, his responsibilities preventing him from locking himself away in a room to come to terms with it.

If he were being truthful with himself, he still hadn’t dared to touch that wound.

And his third encounter with death…

Joel didn’t like to talk about his third encounter with death.

After losing Sarah, every life lost, every death, simply felt like a reunion with an old and loyal friend. Every kill, every loss, none of it affected him for a long time. Until he found Ellie, then you, and now the family you so generously chose to give him.

Death was no longer a friend. Now, he was an enemy that Joel Miller feared more than anything. In fact, it may have been the only thing he feared.

“Check over there! Thought I heard somethin’ move.” Joel called out into the cold night, his horse trotting slowly up a hill while he scanned his surroundings with a flashlight. Tommy and a few other rangers were out with him searching for Matthew, or at least the supplies he’d stolen. They’d searched for at least five miles, but he was nowhere to be found.

“Hey, Joel?” Tommy shouted from across the snowy hill. “I think we found him.”

“You think?” Joel asked with a quirked eyebrow, changing course to join his brother who stood about a hundred feet away, shining his flashlight into a ditch.

When he arrived to where the small search party had all gathered, Joel hopped off his horse and walked over to the ditch, sighing at the sight of Sunshine’s brother bloodied and torn to shreds by infected. Though he was used to such gruesome scenes, he couldn’t bear to look at Matthew’s body for too long, thoughts of having to tell Sunshine consuming him.

“What do you think she’d want us to do with his body? Burn it, bring it back to Jackson?” Tommy asked in as gentle a voice as he could muster, watching as Joel slowly made his way back to his horse.

“I don’t…it ain’t the kind of thing we talk about, Tommy.” Joel sighed, clicking his tongue at his horse, Callus. “Burn it, bury it…don’t matter. Her brother is dead and I gotta be the one to tell her.”

“Joel,” Tommy tried to call out but Joel and Callus were soon flying through the woods to get back home, his eyes staying vigilant now that he knew infected were very recently in the area. The last thing he needed was for you to lose a brother and a partner tonight.

Paul was the one to greet him at the gate, their typical short exchange made even shorter by Joel’s refusal to stop at the stables, bending the rules in order to get home faster.

From the living room window, Joel could see you laying on your back on the sofa, reading a book to his children, both babies asleep on your chest. Though the moment looked tender, he knew your mind was a flurry of anxious thoughts and fears. He felt a pang in his chest as he realized he would have to be the one to worsen your mood even further, but at least he was here. At least he could hold you through it.

“Hey,” he exhaled as he stepped through the door, keeping his voice low as to not wake the twins.

“Joel,” you seemed to breathe properly for the first time in hours, Joel’s face soothing all of the sickening anxiety and concern away. He walked over and grabbed Luna off of your chest, carefully resting her to lay against his as he carried her on one hip. You stood up with Lucas and did the same, the two of you keeping as quiet as could while walking them upstairs to their bedroom. Once the babies were in their cribs and fast asleep, Joel walked you back downstairs with his hand in yours.

Something was off about him. He was too quiet, too stiff, too…scared? Why did he look scared?

“Joel, what’s wrong?” You finally broke, keeping your voice soft but the concern in it was obvious.

“Come sit down with me,” he husked as he walked you to the couch, pulling you down onto his lap so that he could hug you close. Your brows furrowed as he rested his cheek against your chest and squeezed you, your hand reaching to scratch at his scalp. “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” You asked, your voice hardly a whisper.

“Your brother, baby, he, uh…” Joel took in a deep breath as he lifted his head from your chest to look into your eyes. “Infected got to him.”

“What?” She asked with a disbelieving skeptical chuckle, though there was no trace of humor on her face.

“He’s gone, baby,” Joel exhaled, his chest tight as he watched you come to terms with the news, his eyes able to spot all the emotions that came with a loss like this—emotions he’d known so well. Your throat seemed to be swelling, your thick swallows inability to verbalize even a sound giving you away. Your stunned eyes welled with tears, eyelashes blinking them away until they fell down your cheeks. “I am so sorry.”

“Matthew’s dead?” You asked again in pure disbelief, standing up and cupping your hands over your face as you paced around the living room. Joel leaned his elbows on his knees as he watched you, unsure of what to say. “I can’t believe this…I…am so mad at him!”

Joel nodded at you as you finally dropped your hands, looking at him with a scowl.

“Why did he have to do that? He could’ve been happy here! He could’ve found love and settled down and—but he chose that ending!” You ranted and Joel listened patiently even though your volume was too loud, but he didn’t dare silence you. With a sob finally breaking from your chest, you covered your face and rushed to where he sat, straddling his lap as you shook with emotion. Joel held you close, stroking the back of your head with one hand, your fave buried in his neck, and using the other to rub circles on your back. “I just wanted him to find peace.”

“I know,” he cooed, resting his head against yours as he held you. “He’s at peace now.”

“Do you believe that?” You lifted your head to look at him, studying the hesitancy in his hazel eyes.

“I try to,” he whispered.

You hugged him close again, needing his warmth to soothe the ache that filled every single dark corner of your soul with grief. Your mind and body couldn’t understand this sort of loss—it didn’t know what to do with it. It seemed the only thing you could do was cry, so that’s what you did.

All night.

All week.

All year.

November 25th, 2038

“Hey, El,” Joel called out into the busy house as he held Luna on his hip, Tommy’s family over for Thanksgiving. Ellie walked in with a two-year old Lucas on her hip.

“What’s up?”

“I need to go upstairs. Could ya watch Lulu?” He asked with a calm urgency, Ellie nodding in response. Joel set his daughter down and mumbled a thanks before rushing up the stairs to his bedroom where you were getting changed out of your messy cooking clothes into a nicer set. With a knock on the door, he cracked it open and saw you sitting on the floor, silently crying as you held an Arizona keychain Matthew had found and gifted you ten Christmases ago. “Baby…”

“I’m sorry,” you apologized, wiping your face before stuffing the keychain back in a wooden box full of momentos. You stood up and shoved it back in the dark corner of the closet before turning to him.

“Hey, stop. Why are you apologizin’?” He rushed to you and cradled your face in his big, rough hands, his thumbs wiping the tears that remained on your cheeks away.

“I wanted today to be happy…and I fucked it up.”

“No, you did not.” He lovingly scolded, pressing his lips to your forehead. “You’re allowed to grieve, baby.”

“I know, but…I just wanted one day where I’m normal again. Where I can pretend to be normal with all of you and instead I’m up here crying on the floor,” you almost whined, leaning your head onto his collarbone as you hugged him close. Joel kissed the side of your head as he swayed you back and forth, his hand rubbing your back.

“You’re with family, darlin’…you don’t gotta pretend to be anything. We all love you here.” His voice did so much to soothe you that for a minute you wondered if he had a secret superpower he hadn’t told you about. You lifted your head and nodded at him, allowing yourself to buy into what he was telling you. With his thumb stroking over your cheek, he leaned down and placed a soft kiss to your lips. “Come on, the Turkey’s almost done.”

“Okay,” you slid your hand in his and allowed him to walk you downstairs to join the rest of the family.

“Mama!” Lucas called out as soon as he saw you, squirming in Maria’s lap to get down so that he could run to you. Your smile was genuine as you scooped up your son and placed a kiss onto his cheek. “Mama, I hung-y.”

“Dinner’s almost ready,” you informed as you walked further into the room, Joel’s hand resting on the small of your back as he followed you to the couch. He was the first to sit down and to save room on the singular sofa, you sat on his lap with your son on yours.

For a minute, you could see everyone trying to figure out something to say to you. You didn’t blame them for it, after all, you’d pretty much disappeared besides fulfilling your duties at the stables and taking care of your family. There wasn’t much to talk about because they didn’t really know much about you anymore. You didn’t know much about you anymore.

“Vivi was doing great at her horse riding lessons last week,” you started, taking the burden off their shoulders.

“Really?” Tommy chuckled, looking at his daughter who was sat on the floor with Ellie and Luna, playing with some building blocks Joel had made her. “She came home begging us to not make her go again because the horse ‘didn’t like’ her.”

“Well, Snow doesn’t like anybody,” you chuckled. “But they were doing good with each other.”

Another awkward silence passed over the room but was thankfully interrupted by the bell going off on the oven.

“Turkey’s done,” Joel tapped your hip and you stood up, choosing to walk with him, your son still perched on your hip.

“It’s so awkward,” you whispered to him in a whine as he pulled the turkey out. “They don’t know what to say to me. I feel like a sad little alien.”

“No,” he was quick to shake his head as he set the turkey down on the stovetop, peeling off his oven mitts and setting them down on the counter. “They just don’t wanna say the wrong thing, is all.”

“I know,” you sighed and leaned over to peck your sons cheek again out of a need for comfort. “I wish everyone didn’t see me as this fragile thing.”

“I’ll…try and start the conversation, then.” You guffawed at his proposition, watching as he gave you a playfully narrowed look. “What? I know how to keep a conversation goin’.”

“You? Joel Miller? Baby, you’re great at a lot of things, but small talk has never been one of them,” you reached to stroke his beard, earning a chuckle.

“Well, for you I’ll try,” he promised, pinching your chin before turning to the turkey and clapping his hands. “Alright, let’s get carvin’.”

In fairness, Joel had turned out to be quite the conversationalist when he put his mind to it.

As the family sat around the table eating the small feast that you, Joel, and Maria had helped whip up, there was no more awkward silences. Joel kept the conversation going with stories from his childhood, Tommy eager to chime in with his side of each story. Eventually, Maria started to share some of her own memories of holidays pre-outbreak before eagerly turning to you with a smile.

“What about you? Did your family have any holiday traditions?” You sucked in a breath as you cut up the twins food into more manageable bites.

“Uh, I was a little too young to remember much of it, I think,” your eyes flickered to Joel who was already looking at you. He cleared his throat before changing the subject to football, the Miller boys and their father sitting down in front of the TV every thanksgiving with round bellies and heavy-lidded eyes, watching the game.

“Tommy always passed out before halftime,” Joel added with a chuckle, his brother throwing a piece of stuffing across the table at him.

“And you were asleep by the third quarter.”

“I remember my dad and Matthew used to watch the game every year,” you spoke up, causing every set of eyes to turn to you. Joel gave you an encouraging nod as you looked at him, his boot touching yours beneath the table.

“Who was his team?” Tommy asked as he lifted his glass to his lips.

“The Cowboys,” you answered with a shrug. “I don’t know anything about football besides that people either love them or hate them.”

“Well, you’ll find you’re amongst friends,” Tommy gestured between himself and Joel. “We’re Texans, after all.”

“Well,” Joel interjected, earning an eyebrow raise from both you and Tommy.

“Well what? You jumped ship in the twenty-three years since football ended?” Maria asked with a chuckle.

“I’ve never been a Cowboys fan,” he chuckled his response, glancing between each shocked face. “I’m a Texans fan! Tommy, you know that.”

“No the hell I didn’t.”

“So wait—there’s a Texas based football team called the Cowboys, and then there’s another Texas based football team called the Texans?” Ellie asked with a confused look.

“Yes,” Joel and Tommy answered simultaneously.

“Well that seems like an oversight in planning.” She commented, earning a laugh from you. Everyone at the table looked stunned for a moment at the sound before easing into it and joining you.

For the first time in a long time, you felt like things were normal again. You felt like things would be okay. And while that sounded like very little to ask for, to you—in this world—it was everything.

After locating the football he’d found a few month back while on a supply run, Joel and Tommy attempted to show Ellie and Vivienne how to play football out in the snowy back yard. You sat by the fire with a big blanket wrapped around you, the twins upstairs taking a post-dinner nap.

“Tommy’s gonna throw his damn back out,” Maria lamented as she sat down beside you with a spare glass of wine in hand, handing it to you.

“Thanks,” you accepted it and took a swig of the dark red liquid. “Joel’s so sure he’s still a thirty year old. Poor guy is gonna be in pain in the morning.”

“Those Miller boys,” she sighed with a chuckle. A moment of comfortable silence passed over the two of you as you watched Tommy try and fail to tackle his older brother, earning a playful shove into the snow. “Are you doing okay? I know it’s not an easy thing to talk about, but…I just want you to know that I’m here. I know what it’s like to lose a sibling like that. And…I’m here. That’s all.”

“It’s so strange to describe to other people, you know? Even to Joel,” you paused, basking in the sight of the love of your life laughing with his head tipped back as Ellie tackled Tommy into the snow. “It’s not even about me being sad that he’s gone—he was an ass. But he was also the only thing I had left from the world before all of this.” You gestured around. “You asked me earlier about my family’s old holiday traditions and I couldn’t remember anything. But Matthew would have.”

Maria nodded, reaching over her hand and squeezing your knee. The simple gesture was enough to have you crying again, this time out of sheer gratefulness for the family you’d stumbled onto in all this horror and strife and grief. In all of this bliss and beauty and belonging.

Joel’s head whipped over at the sound of a single sniffle, his smile fading into a look of concern for a moment before he saw it—your smile. He watched you lean over and hug Maria close, and he watched as you wipes your tears away with the heels of your palms. And when your eyes met his, he saw you for the first time in a long time. You. His Sunshine. The woman responsible for everything bright and blooming in his life. The woman he thought he might have lost to the darkness of this world, who’s light had almost gone out for good. But here you were again, beaming and warm, full of life again.

With a smile on his face, Joel walked to you, his feet moving slowly and carefully through the snow until he stood in front of where you sat, your eyes locked on his. Joel leaned down, his gloved hand cradling your jaw, his thumb stroking over your cheek, his lips close enough to feel the warmth of yours. Before he leaned in to kiss you—to show you that he missed you—you halted him with your voice.

“Thank you for the life you’ve given me,” you whispered, just for him to hear, and even then, he thought he might have imagined it. “Thank you for being my light, Joel.”

“Oh, Sunshine,” he exhaled, overwhelmed by his love for you. His lips pressed against yours, your hands resting on his head to keep him there until everyone started to boo at their display of affection. Joel pulled away with a chuckle and rested his forehead against yours. “I’m so glad I met you.”

“My cowboy,” you whispered, running your thumb over his cheekbone.

“My stable girl.”

taglist: @uselsshuman @joelmillerscoffee @wildemaven @axshadows @sherala007 @browneyes-issac @kimm4710 @stxrrylunatic @sara-alonso @paulalikestuff @chxpsi @auberosier @mashomasho @harriedandharassed @trickstersp8 @trinkets01 @jlmaddinson @laureliciousdefinition @oh-no-a-whovian @buoyfriend @chorraich @extraneous-trip @oliviajdjarin @wumpsquill @love-affair-with-fandoms @graciexmarvel @amb11 @t0fudaddy @reigndropss @wondeerfull @multifand0m-gal0re @bfences @hypnoash @chronic-aly @wheresarizona @pedropascalsx @xocalliexo @myswficlist @untitledarea @lexloon @bbyanarchist @alwayslurkinginthebackground (sorry if your tag isn’t working! and let me know if you’d like to be added!)

[hummingbird-of-light]

In Our Favor

Part 347

McCoy

McCoy held tight to his husband. Robbie’s proposal hung in the dark silence of the cave.

“Oh Robbie…”

Somehow the silence grew heavier. McCoy could feel his heart pounding in his chest. What was Leah going to say? She couldn’t be so cruel and break Robbie’s heart…

The wait was becoming unbearable, when finally Leah choked out a sob. Her hand, which McCoy had been holding, pulled away from his.

“Of course!” The words came out in a tight whisper.

McCoy felt Scotty relax and his own pulse began to slow to normal. Another sob, from Robbie, and then the shuffling sounds of the pair hugging each other tight. Around McCoy Scotty’s arm tightened and he returned a squeeze to Scotty’s hand.

“N-n-now we have to be rescued,” McCoy said. “The g-g-galaxy will expect a w-w-wedding.”

He let out a cry as Leah swung her arm at him in the dark.

“I th-th- think we have t-t-to t-t-try digging now,” McCoy said after some time had passed from the proposal. “Any longer and w-w-we won’t be able.”

Shifting around he reached in his pocket to find his comm. The small light would show them where they needed to dig. And one of them could watch it in case it finally got a signal.

“It’ll w-w-warm us,” Scotty agreed.

McCoy could finally see his husband in the dim light and Scotty’s expression was grim. On his other side, Leah and Robbie had mixed expressions of joy and fear.

“Here.” McCoy shoved the device at his sister. “You watch. We’ll dig.”

He moved clumsily as he got to his feet, his body feeling stiff with the cold.

“I c-c-can help dig,” Leah protested.

“We can t-take turns,” Scotty suggested.

“Our h-hands are going to g-g-get colder,” Robbie said.

“We’ve gotta do something.”

“It sent!”

Three young men jumped at Leah’s exclamation.

“What lass?” Scotty found his words first.

“A signal!”

“My m-m-message?” Scotty’s eyes widened.

Leah nodded.

“They’ll f-f-find us!” Robbie nearly yelled in joy.

Leah was jabbing at the comm. Her face in the small light from the comm looked relieved. They all jumped as the comm chirped.

“It’s Father!” Leah said, tears welling in her eyes.

McCoy’s heart soared. He wanted to grab Scotty and dance around the small space.

“We’re the only one s-s-still missing! They’re coming!”

Robbie grabbed Leah as her tears began to fall. McCoy’s own eyes began to prick. He was exhausted and half frozen. He wanted to be in his own bed, close to Scotty warming up together. He grabbed his comm from Leah’s hand, and read the message.

Help was coming. They’d be safe soon. Relief flowed into McCoy and he pulled Scotty tight. His husband’s lips were cold as he met them, but the prince didn’t care. They’d be warm again soon enough!

Part 348

Scotty

"How l-l-long d-d-d-do you think it will take?"

After receiving the message from David, the boys had rejoined Leah instead of digging. Even though the positive news from the king had been a reason to rejoice, it felt like an eternity before anything happened.

When daylight finally penetrated the cave and the masses of snow in front of the entrance were moved out of the way, the rescued lads and lass could hardly believe it for a moment. Slowly, they helped each other to their feet and were soon surrounded by first aiders who asked them how they were and whether they were injured.

But it wasn't just the rescuers who rushed into the small cave, but also two very familiar people.

"Leonard! Leah!"

"Monty! Robbie!"

David and Francine!

Both the father of the royal children and the mother of the two Scottish brothers quickly ran towards their children, embracing them.

"Oh, thank God! Ye're all right," Francine tearfully exclaimed, as she showered kisses on her boys' faces.

"Aye, m-m-mum. We a-a-are fine."

"E-e-everything's o-okay."

Robbie heard David talking to Leah and Leonard as well, but he couldn't quite make out the words. Only Leonard's last statement was clearly audible.

"C-c-can we p-please go somewhere w-w-where it's warm now?"

He didn't need to say that twice.

It wasn't long before the four of them were sitting in the living room of the chalet. They had wrapped themselves in blankets and were now snuggled up close together on two sofas.

Robbie glanced at Scotty, who had his head on Leonard's shoulder and his eyes closed. It almost seemed as if he would fall asleep at any moment.

And Robbie also felt sleepy. The whole situation had been incredibly stressful and the warm blankets and crackling fire in the fireplace made it incredibly difficult not to fall asleep immediately.

The young Scotsman's gaze wandered over to Leah, who was sitting next to him and holding his hand tightly in hers. Her eyes were fixed on the fire, but she seemed to notice that Robbie was looking at her, because she quickly turned her head towards him and smiled gently.

Robbie's heart beat faster. He could still hardly believe his luck. Leah had actually said yes. She was going to marry him. And yet something was bothering the Scotsman.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly and Leah tilted her head.

"What do you mean?"

"The proposal. I... I had planned it all differently. It was supposed to be beautiful and romantic and–"

"Shhh." Leah put a finger to Robbie's lips, interrupting him. She smiled. "What's more romantic than proposing in a situation where everything seems hopeless?"

Robbie shrugged his shoulders. His original plan had been so perfect, but perhaps this situation had been much more extraordinary.

Before he could say anything in reply, however, the door opened and their relatives came in.

David and Eleanor. Francine and Alasdair. Even Dr. Boyce was with them.

"Here. Some tea and hot chocolate for you." Eleanor placed a tray on the table. By the time Robbie and the others had arrived at the chalet, the queen and Alasdair had been overjoyed to receive them. They, too, had been incredibly relieved that the youngest of the family were well.

"That must have been a very scary situation for all of ye. How are ye feeling?" Granddad looked from one to another.

[denimbex1986]

'A few days after the marriage equality bill was passed, Andrew Haigh's 'All of Us Strangers' started making its rounds again on social media, since it arrived (just in time, one would say) in Greek theatres. The film, which was one of the last screenings at the "Premiere Nights" held at the IDEAL cinema, is now also being screened at Cinobo Opera and belongs to the fantasy romance genre . Between us, there is so much more.

I won't lie. When I found out it was a fantasy romance, I had no idea that I would end up with tears in my eyes and so emotionally charged. Haigh's magical realism beautifully embraces the central theme and opens up a huge conversation about queer identity. As Christos Politis (aka Christos doesn't live here anymore) said on LIFO's 'The Review' podcast: “I wanted to see a queer film but luckily I didn't just see a queer film. If I had to put it somewhere, I would definitely put it very high on the lists of the best queer films ever made […] Combined, it blew me to pieces.”

Same Christos, same 🥲

When the broken fire alarm goes off, Adam (Andrew Scott) , a lonely screenwriter, descends on the entrance of the apartment building. Looking up at the other apartments, he sees only one has light: Harry's (Paul Mescal) . He shows up drunk at his door and jokingly says "should I come in?", to which Adam replies "no" (seriously, who would throw a package at Paul Mescal?!). From there begins a strange, sad and bittersweet journey of self-discovery and exploration.

Everyone's performances (well, 4 people were all) had something unreal: You could understand everything from their eyes! With the feeling of loneliness overwhelming every frame of the film, Andrew Scott was the personification of a tragic character; the viewer knows everything, but the protagonist discovers it along the way. On the other hand, Paul Mescal brought an air of melancholy as Harry, portraying a young man both full of love and sadness.

' All of Us Strangers ' explores queer sexuality, both from the protagonists' conversations and from a parent's perspective. First spoiler: ours turns out to be little delulu as he sees the ghosts of his parents when he visits the house where he grew up. Based on this, he begins to reminisce about his childhood with the help of his parents, in the style: "Do you remember when...". We've all experienced it with our own parents and we've all stopped them from saying it. This movie, however, made me want to listen to it again.

One of the many conversations he decides to have with his parents (Claire Foy and Jamie Bell) is that of coming out . Being almost 50, Adam has relatively recently discovered and embraced this side of himself. So when he decides to talk to his parents, he does it piecemeal: first to his mother and then to his father. Somewhat stereotypically (although the percentages also speak), mothers tend to accept their child's "difference" more easily than fathers. The punch that this film has in store for us, however, is the immediate acceptance of the father.

In an incredibly touching scene, Jamie Bell apologizes to his cinematic son for not protecting him from bullying at school, culminating in a hug. But in the reflection of the mirror behind them, we see the father embracing a younger version of the son - when he needed him most.

Adam's conversation with his mother is a great parallel to the conversation with older generations. We see her fearing the outcry, talking about illness and lonely life, expressing prejudices that have been cultivated in the way of thinking of many older people. In other words, a man can be lonely, as long as he is straight. In this case, it's typical. But if someone is homosexual, then this is the cause of his loneliness.

The discussion in question:

Adam: “Men can get married. And the women."

Mom: "What, between them?"

Oh yes"

M: "Why?"

A: "What do you mean why?"

M: “Isn't it like you want it all to yourself? Do you want to get married and have children?'

A: “I don't know. It wasn't possible for so many years that I thought it wasn't worth trying to get married and have children."

That sentence hurt 🥲

Overall, the whole movie is a trip down memory lane. With every flashback of Adam, I find myself in my father's house, with all the beautiful memories. It is still a heartbreaking story that belongs to the spectrum of the fantastic, but it makes you feel very familiar. Perhaps one of the best films of '24.

PS: And a fan fact: The house where the scenes with Adam and his parents were filmed is actually the real house where the director of the movie grew up!

Tissues, sweet and good viewing 🥲'

[charcharrealsmooth]

Don't fear the Reaper (or werewolf)

Summary - The Marauders find out about Remus' secret, and Sirius doesn't take kindly to it.

Mainly centered around Remus, Sirius, and James because I didn't know what to do with Peter and I'm sorry- This is my first time writing something like this, I hope it's okay

The lights are too bright and the footsteps walking toward me and the nearby whispering are too loud.

“Oh, you’re awake, how are you feeling, Remus?” Madame Pomfrey hands me a potion, smells metallic, must be a healing draught.

“‘m fine” my voice is hoarse, god, was I howling?

She looks down at me, and gives me a sad sort of smile, “You’ve got some visitors, are you okay to see them?”

“Uh… okay?”

Quick footsteps rush towards my bed, Sirius and James push through the curtains.

“We know.”

“You… know? Know what?” I ask, looking between the two. They can’t know, how could they?

Sirius keeps silent, fidgeting with his sleeve’s cuff. 

“Why you’ve got all those scars, where you’re going each month,” James says.

“I get colds often,” I defend, there’s no changing James’ mind, I know, but maybe it’s not too late. Maybe if I can just convince them that I’m not a… 

Maybe I won’t have to leave?...

“You’re a werewolf.” It’s not a question, but it’s not not a question, Sirius still hasn’t said a word, but he’s staring at me expectantly.

I take a breath.

“Yeah.”

Sirius’ stare immediately turns to one of hurt and disgust. He’s still silent, and honestly I think I’d rather him just curse me.

“Okay…” James mutters. “Okay, this is okay, right Sirius?... Sirius?”

Sirius continues to glare at me, like he wants me dead, and I can hardly blame him for it. I’m a monster, always will be one. I don’t deserve friends or acceptance, or anything really. 

“No, James. No it’s not bloody ‘okay’, he’s a werewolf. A werewolf, James!”

“He’s our friend, he’s still Remus,” James assures him warily, but I don’t think it will do much. 

Sirius tears his eyes away from me, taking one last look at James before he storms off, slamming the hospital wing door shut on his way out. 

“Sorry about him, mate, he’s just a bit… surprised. We all are, you’re still a marauder though, werewolf or not,” James puts on the type of voice you'd use to comfort a child, I mean, I appreciate the effort, truly, he’s trying more than I’m worth.

“It’s fine, you don’t need to act like it’s okay. I won’t be offended,” I mumble. Who would want to be around a monster, especially one so dangerous, for any reason other than to sell their teeth or pelt. 

But this is James Potter. 

James is safe.

“Remus, don’t say that, you’re our friend, Sirius is just being a prat, Pete and I don’t mind, you’re still our Remus.”

Why is he being so kind?

“...Thanks, I don’t deserve you guys.” I look down at the bed covers, wincing when James puts his hand on my shoulder.

“Oh, sorry mate-” James takes his hand away, “But don’t say things like that, please, you aren’t suddenly worthless or anything because you were bit when you were… How old were you?”

“I was four.” 

“Bloody hell, that’s young… Are you okay? Like, right now?” James looks down at me in concern, taking a seat in a nearby chair.

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

James seems to pick up on my unwillingness to discuss this topic further. “Oh, uh, okay, well, I’m going to go back to the dorms, I’m going to see if I can talk some sense into Black, I’ll see you in a bit?” He looks at me, hopeful.

“Yeah, see you.”

“Sirius, he’s Remus,” James pleads as they hide behind the curtains of Sirius’ bed. They think they’re being sly, whispering, but I can hear them loud and clear, blame it on the wolf, I guess. 

“No, he’s a bloody monster, how can you act like anything about this is okay, he’s a half-breed and, need I remind you, extremely dangerous!”

A slap.

“What the hell was that for you wanker!” Sirius whisper-yells.

“He is our friend! You sound just like your bloody mother,” James shoots back. Sirius snorts at him before ripping open the curtain and hurrying out from the room. 

“Bloody hell,” James mutters under his breath before returning to his own bed.

Sirius has been avoiding me like the plague, who could blame him, really. Every night, James would go to Sirius’ bed to try to talk to him, convince him why I’m not completely terrible, I suppose.

And Sirius’ responses to this have ranged from “He should be hunted and killed” to quiet sobs in the dead of night. I guess it can’t be easy to realise your second-closest friend of 2 years is a werewolf, can’t expect him to be happy. 

Tonight’s another one of those sobbing nights, however he’s not in his bed this time. I find him in the little nook hidden behind a tapestry near the dungeons, he’s thrilled to see me. 

“Bugger off,” he says through sniffles, trying to make it seem he wasn’t just crying his eyes out. 

I look at him for a second before climbing up onto the ledge with him, sitting on the opposite end. “No can do, d’you want to tell me what’s wrong or?...”

“Nothing’s wrong,” Sirius mumbles. I don’t buy it.

“Mate, you haven’t so much as waved to me for the past 2 weeks, something’s wrong.”

Sirius doesn’t answer. 

“You don’t have to tell me, but I’m not going to judge you, I’ve no room to judge, as we both know.” I laugh awkwardly, trying to bring some levity to this situation before it becomes too dire. 

“You’ll hate me.”

That takes me by suprise, I could never hate him, I mean, sure, he gets on my nerves constantly, but he’s Sirius. 

I could never hate Sirius. 

“No,” I say, trying to sound comforting. Tears return to his eyes, threatening to fall once more. He wipes them away quickly. I look away until he's got himself composed. 

“You should, if you knew what- if you-”

“I won’t hate you, Sirius. I promise,” I interrupt before he can go on about why exactly he thinks I ought to hate him, it doesn’t matter what he says, I’ve made up my mind already.

“Oh,” he says, nearly inaudible. “Uh, okay then…”

I glance at him, urging him to go on.

“I don’t deserve you, y’know. I just… well, you know how my family doesn’t take well to half-breeds and such?” I nod. “I suppose I just kind of took some of that in. When we found out you were, y’know… I was terrified of you, I thought you’d hurt us… I genuinely hated you,” he trails off before rushing to say, “And I know that’s so bloody stupid, you were one of my best mates and I had to go and just ruin it because you’re a…  a werewolf,” he says, more confidently. “I know I don’t deserve your friendship, you can leave if you want, hate me too, I deserve it.”

I don’t respond for a moment.

“No you don’t, you didn’t choose to be born into the ‘Noble and most Ancient House of Black’ or whatever. It’s not your fault they poisoned your mind, made you believe their lies, y’know?” I look at him, offering a small smile. “If you’re done hating me, I’d love to be your friend still.”

He perks up like an excited dog when the doorbell rings. “Really?”

“Of course, mate,” I nod, grinning.

“Thanks!” He throws himself toward me for a hug. After a moment, I let go of him.

“C’mon, we ought to get back to our room before James has a fit, I swear, he's bloody insane sometimes.” Sirius chuckles.

“It’s his motherly instincts, what can I tell you.”

[bajishoe]

Hi, can we get a part 2 of the Baji and chifuyu scenario…would chifuyu and Baji would accept to see reader again after what happened they feel too guilty

Tokyo Revengers Scenarios

Characters: Baji and Chifuyu.

Genre: angst to fluff

warnings: mentions of rape, trauma.

Plot: Aftermath of the traumatic(rape) incident.

part 1

requests

You woke up with a severe headache, opening your eyes to a blinding shade of white. You were sure you heard a door close but you convinced yourself that you were only imagining it. Your whole body screamed at you as you tried to sit up.

Once you did, you looked around recognizing the room to be one you’d most likely find at a hospital.

But what were you doing here? Why don’t you remember?

A nurse suddenly came into the room, holding a clipboard. She looked at you surprised that you were awake.

“Hold on, i’ll get a doctor.”

You were confused about all the bandages wrapped aroung your arms and legs and that excruciating pain in your lower abdomen.

The nurse came back with the doctor and they started to do their thing. One the doctor left, the nurse stayed behind.

“You’ve been here for 2 days.” She said looking at you. “A boy was here with you. Most likely your lover. He was injured too, but as soon as he got his injuries treated he came to see you.” She sighed. “I don’t know much of what happened but he looked completely distraught. He was by your side for the entire time you were here so his mother had to stop by to take vare of him. He even stayed after visiting hours, refusing to go home…He was crying.”

Your eyes widened as you recalled all the events before you passed out.

Just thinking about it made you shake in fear.

You were used. infront of him.

Your first thought was that Baji left because he was disgusted by you but you threw that thought out the window since you knew that he knew you did nothing wrong. you knew he trusted you.

You had to see him. You had to see your boyfriend.

Was he okay? was he hurt? you saw him tied up too and injected with that syringe even if it was a small amount, you couldn’t help but be worried.

“He just left. right after you woke up, i guess.”

You looked at her.

So the door did close.

“D-do you know where he is?” You gulped before asking, not trusting your voice.

You wanted to break down and cry because you felt so used. so worthless. But you wanted to meet him more than anything.

“He’s outside. Probably listening to us. I’ll get him for you.”

You nodded at her, wanting her to do so.

The nurse smiled at you reassuringly as she head outside.

In a matter of seconds Baji came inside and took a seat beside your bed.

“H-hey..” Your voice cracked from the soreness of screaming from 2 nights ago.

You frowned, realising he was making no effort to look you in the eye.

“K-Kei..” You reached your hand out to touch him but he pulled away.

“Don’t touch me.” He said, eyes still downcast.

“H-huh?” You took back your hand to not make him uncomfortable. “i’m sorry. i was helpless. you’re the only person who should be able to touch me. i’m so sorry that he laid h-his hands on me. please forgive m-” There was no mistake that you were crying, but what had cut you off was the sound of your boyfriend’s sobs.

“shut up.”

You backed away just a bit by how low his voice was.

You saw him visibly freeze at your actions.

“Blame me, you idiot. why are you apologizing? you should be ashamed of me. why the hell do you still want to talk to me- no- why would still even want to see me after all that? i promised i’d protect you but i was too useless to do that. so why? why are you- so- nice…?” He choked out a few sobs by the end of his sentence.

“because i still love you.” you smiled at him, fighting the urges to break down infront of him.

He finally looked up to meet your gaze.

Tears had stained his cheeks as his eyes were all puffy and his cheeks, nose and eyes were red. but despite all that, he still narrowed his eyebrows at you.

“then why the hell are you hiding your true self right now?”

his question was your last straw.

you completely broke down infront of him.

“is it okay if i hug you?” he asked, still keeping his distance.

once you gave him a small nod, he let out an extremely relieved sigh as he wrapped his arms around your shaking figure.

“i’m so sorry, princess. i’m so…so damn sorry.” he’d keep whispering into your ear as you cried on his shoulder, tightening your grip on his shirt.

“hurts…it hurts, kei… he- he just used me infront of everyone- infront of you- i can’t feel my legs- i feel so sore down there- my wrists hurt, my head hurts. Why didn’t he stop, Kei? w-why didn’t he…..i told him i don’t want to…why…”

the both of you felt so devastated, clinging on to one another for comfort.

“they picked war with us, baby. don’t worry. i’ll kill them. i’ll kill them all.” baji felt his world crumbling when all he could hear was your weak sobs as your grip loosened a bit.

“i feel numb, kei.”

“i know. i’m sorry. i’ll fix this. i’ll leave you alone.” Baji stood up as he headed for the door but you caught his hand.

“Don’t leave me. Don’t run away. Face this. Help me face this.” You yanked him back into your embrace.

“Please help me.” You whispered into his ear followed by a broken sob.

Ah…that feeling where your stomach pools with regret, anxiety and remorse. he felt like throwing up. but he knew that now would be a good time to man up, stop the waterworks and actually be of some help to you.

“We’ll get through this, y/n. together. we’ll get throught this together.” he said, pecking you on the forehead. “no more tears, love. it’s all over now. we’ll take baby steps, kay?” He asked you, cupping your puffed up cheeks whilst looking at you with pure love.

“Yeah.” You smiled a little as you wiped your face.

His admiration just grew so much for you. You were so strong. It made his heart swell that you weren’t denying his help.

—

Mikey, Draken, Pah, Takemichi, Smiley, Takashi and Chifuyu came rushing into the room, interrupting the scene of Baji feeding you peyoung yakisoba.

They all started to ask how you were. Everyone was told that you had been jumped on by the men of moebius by Mikey and Draken. They wanted to keep the real incident behind covers since they thought you wouldn’t appreciate smth so embarrasing to be out in the open for everyone to gossip about.

Mikey and Draken made sure that none of the guys touched you since that could trigger something.

Baji fed you the last of the yakisoba before standing up and looking at his friends.

“Mikey, I have a favor to ask of you.” Baji bowed his head at Mikey.

Mikey looked a bit surprised by the sudden formality.

“What is it?”

“I want all of Toman to kill Moebius.” Baji said with the most ferocious look in his eyes. “Slaughter eveyone.”

“We won’t be slaughtering anyone, Baji. Calm down.” Draken said as he placed a hand on his shoulder.

“But we will leave them on the brink of death. how does that sound?”

Baji’s eyes lit up at Mikey’s proposal.

“Let’s kick some ass.”

While you were passed out, you started to imagine stuff. The whole scenario kept replaying in your mind while you were at the brink of waking up. Your eyes filled with tears in rememberamce of the horrible and utmost traumatizing incident.

You gasped softly yet roughly because of your sore throat as you slightly jerked awake. You felt your entire being trembling as your vision didn’t quite return to you yet. When it did, you looked around, not moving from your position considering you were in a lot of pain.

“Y-y/n…?”

You whipped your head towards the direction of the voice.

But what you saw…. the same man who played you like a toy, not giving a damn about how much you were hurting physically and mentally.

You eyes widened in fear as you tried to back away when he reached out his hand to grab onto you. At least, that’s what you thought.

You had been mentally scarred from the experience of your cries of help being ignored.

“D-don’t come near me…” You said as you got off the bed and slowly started to back away no matter how much it hurt, no matter how much you wanted to scream in pain.

But you kept seeing that man trying to close that gap between you two.

You couldn’t yell out a cry of help both because 1. you didn’t have the power to and your throat hurt like hell, 2. you were afraid that even if you did muster up the strength to call out for help, it’d just go unheard. ignored.

You couldn’t help the panic arising in your system as he came withing arms length.

“It’s just me. Let’s have some fun.” He said as you saw him reach out to you once more.

“Ple-ase! i-i don’t want th-this.” You suddenly kneeled infront of the man, begging for mercy.

“No more…please. please!”

“Y/n? It’s me- Baby! it’s me, Chifuyu! Matsuno Chifuyu….”

You raised your gaze to see that the man’s face morphed into Chifuyu’s which held the most concerning look ever as his cheeks were stained with tears while his hands were reached out towards your figure but never going further than that 10 cm distance as it just stopped there, shaking.

“Baby…it’s me….Chifuyu. Your Chi.” He said as more tears started to run down his cheeks while he sobbed, looking at you desperately.

“Chi..fuyu….?”

——

Your small gasps and pants woke Chifuyu up from his slumber on the couch of the hospital room. He had stayed overnight, looking after you. He went to sleep just 2 hours ago, not feeling sleepy because of the regret he was feeling as he cried for the majority of the time he stayed by your bedside, talking to your unconcious figure, repetedly apologizing.

He quickly but quietly got up, wanting to know how you were.

“Y-y/n….” His voice came out raspy from all that crying.

But his mind turned balnk when he saw your expressions change from confused to absolutely frightened when you looked at him. His heart broke even more than it already had when he saw that you were trying to back away from him. He did smth wrong, didn’t he? You were scared of him too. He couldn’t thinknof anything else but to assure you that he won’t hurt you.

“D-don’t come near me…” He watched you as a fresh new stream of tears flowed down his face when he saw you get up a back away from him.

He stood there frozen as he knew you were in immense pain because your facial expressions reflected that. as well as your shaky legs that were about to give in any minute.

“Baby…I won’t hurt you.” He said as he took small, slow steps toawrds you, trying his best to not scare you.. But it seemed like you hadn’t heard him at all.

Paying close attention to your eyes, he noticed that you were looking at him but they were defocused.

His heart clenched hard as he realised you couldn’t recognise him.

“Baby…y/n… it’s me..” He said reaching out to you as your face contorted in fear as if you heard something completely different. What really crushed his soul, was when you got on your knees and started to beg him to not hurt you.

He took in a deep breath to calm his ragged breathing from all those sobs and knelt down infront of you, calling out to you as his hands froze in that 10cm distance.

“Baby…it’s me….Chifuyu. Your Chi.” He had never felt this devastated in his life, ever. He was literally all broken in pieces infront of you, begging to be recogised as your boyfriend and not as a monster.

“Chi…fuyu…..?”

His eyes widened as he retracted his hand, touching his head on the floor, as if submitting to you.

He did it so you wouldn’t see him as some sort of threat, since you wont be afraid of someone who was benath you and not above you.

“Yes, my love. It’s me. It’s only me.” He raised his head slightly, raising it more, gradually with time.

He looked you in the eyes with a soft gaze.

“I won’t hurt you, love.”

His heart hurt when he saw your lips wobble, looking into his eyes, but also swelled with relief when he realised that you could finally recognise him completely.

“May i please touch you? i’ll just help you get on the bed. If you want me to stop touching you after that, it’s completely fine with me.” He said with his hands by either side of his head, in a surrender positin as he held his intentions clear.

He helped you up after he gained your approval. Although you did panic slightly at his touch at first but then remembered that it’s just chifuyu.

“Are you hurt? Feeling hungry? I’ll get some water first.” He starting pouring some water in a glass that was on your nightstand.

“‘m fine, babe.” your voice still rasped.

He handed you the water, watching you drink up.

You two sat there for a while after that. just letting the situation sink in. none of you saw this coming. but now that it already happened, both of you need to be strong.

“So…should i call a doctor for you?”

You shook your head. “A bit later. i don’t want to see anyone else right now.”

He nodded, understanding your situation.

The waterworks had stopped and you guys just sat there, emotionless.

You suddenly felt the need to hold your boyfriend. He must’ve been broken completely by not being able to do anything about the situation.

His figure instantly relaxed when you hugged him close, inhaling your scent even though most of it was gone.

“I wish i could’ve protected you, love. It’s all my fault. i’m so sorry i let that happen. i understand if you want to leave me. but please know if i could, i would 100% take away all your pain and have myself bear it instead.”

You chuckled a bit at his monologue.

you came to terms with it.

the past cannot be changed, and you might need therapy to improve your mental health but it’s all worth it as long as you had your loving boyfriend by your side. The tears had seemed to lighten the weight on your chest as you felt yourself grow a bit positive.

“Would you not overthink so much for once? Of course i’m not going to leave you. It wasn’t your fault. We’re going to be okay. aight?”

He cracked a small smile.

“What in the world did i do to deserve you?” He ran his fingers through your hair letting the last of his tears fall.

“Promise me one thing, Chi.”

He pulled back, looking you in the eyes.

“Yes?”

“Kick their asses.”

He smirked. “There’s no way in hell i’m going to let them go after what they did to you, love.”

He pecked your forhead.

“I love how you’re so strong, love. I’ll defenitley avenge you.” He smiled at you in adoration.

“That’s my baby.”

———

It’s been 3 days since you were released from the hospital and Baji had called him over to question his absence in the gang while he was taking care of you, not leaving your side during the day and being there for you when you needed him at night.

Chifuyu didn’t tell him all the details but Baji knew exactly what went down by the vague description.

“Hah?! So they’re asking for war, huh?” Baji smirked with a menacing look.

“It seems so.” said mikey coming out from the bushes folllowed by the rest of the founding members (except for the 5th division’s captain 💀✋)

“They wanna lay their hands on a lady? They sure do got hell to pay then.” Said Draken.

Chifuyu was startled by their presence but also relieved that he wouldn’t be needing to repeat himself.

“Mikey.” Chifuyu said, raising his fist out, pointing it at him.

“Let’s kill them.”

[kookiecrumb]

jjk|| Your Head

"tags": @kazthebrekkerofinej

word count: uhhhh

summary: Jungkook is the heir to the throne of your Kingdom! In this tale of duty versus heart, will love prevail victorious?

tags: Royalty!Jungkook x Peasant!Reader, oneshot, smut, fluff, slight angst, some crack, pining, forbidden lovers, Jungkookie has a sweet tooth, strangers to friends to lovers

warnings: explicit language, impact play, birthday sex (technically), fingering, oral (m receiving*), love marking, alcohol consumption, s&m themes, horny grinding, praise kink/body worship

a/n:

hey guys!

Firstly, I want to say how proud I am of myself for growing so much during this fic. I learned a lot about what I'm comfortable with, what I'd like to work on, and where my confidences lie.

I won't lie and say it's been easy, because writing this meant dealing with a lot of my fears? I'm excited for all the works that are to come.

The only thing I can do is be as receptive to growth as possible, so I'm looking forward to learning...

*I actually learned that Vaseline wasn't invented until like the 1870s? The fic is written in the 1810s, so I actually had a choice between having them do it with vegetable oil or spit. Spit won.

◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇

5 years ago

You bend over to pick up an apple that had rolled over under your father's produce cart, praying that it isn't bruised so that you have to pay for it out of your dinner, when a crumpled piece of paper hits you in the ass.

Confused, you crawl out from under the stand and unwrap the paper.

The paper itself is of the finest quality you've ever seen. It's a sturdy cardstock, bleached white with gold etchings on the borders. The print on the top of it reads "His Highness Jeon's Royal Study," and scribbled in some kid's amateur cursive below, "Nice butt."

You directed your gaze upwards, towards the towering castle walls. Sure enough, a boy no older than 15 had his noggin popping out from the top of the rampart, with two wide eyes staring down, curious as to your reaction. This was Prince Jungkook, heir to the throne of your kingdom.

"Shouldn't you be equestrian horse riding or playing polo or something?" You shout. He furrows his eyebrows, apparently offended at your assumption, and then disappears behind the edifice.

Moments later, another paper hits your shoulder as you're practicing your caligraphy behind your cart. It lands between the apples, so you reach your hand over and fish out out.

You glance up at the anticipant, and sure enough he's there with his doe eyes and his coconut head, ogling.

"No, dumbie. That's at MID-day." Well how were YOU supposed to know the royal schedule of the crown prince, it wasn't just common knowlegde you learned from being a humble farmer's daught--

Ah!

"Will you STOP?!" You put your foot down. "Unless you're here to buy my apples, then you're not getting ANY, little Prince." Oh, shit. You gave him ideas. Now it was really over for you.

In less than half an hour, half a company of men arrived at the marketplace, asking about your little old apple stand, and sure enough, Jungkook had bought out the entire cart so that you were forced to help with the transaction.

The young prince had eyes frankly too big for his head, with the most prominent cupid's bow you've ever seen. His nose slightly outgrew his face and his ears were hidden away behind his short, black hair. "Now you can talk to me." He gave you a rose he'd stolen from the royal garden. "I am Jungkook, heir to the throne of--"

"I know who you are." You interrupt him, documenting His Highness' total in your calligraphy book.

With a hand perched on his chest from surprise, he scoffed. "And I happen to think you're really pretty, so I was going to ask you to be my very first consor--"

"You're 15, you have playmates not consorts."

"And how old are you?!" He's had it, raising his voice and taking a bite out of one of your apples with force.

"16, old enough to have suitors." You tease. Jungkook hangs his head a little. He just needed someone to talk to, it would seem. Reluctantly, you scribbled down your address down on a piece of note paper and handed it to him.

"Look, if you buy more of my apples, I'll have an excuse to tell my Dad so I can hang out with you." You spoke in a low voice as to not raise suspicion.

Your dad is standing negotiating with the guards about prices, his usual embarassing haggling gruffly overpowering the guards elegant twiddle-tones.

"Wonderful! See you soon, my sweet!" He resumes his confident demeanor, tucking the paper into his overcoat with a small smile. He salutes you boyishly and marches away with a year's supply of apples.

For the next week, the royal kitchen had baked 3 apple pies, made 5 fruit salads, 4 batches of apple muffins, and threw the rest of them in Sangria; that's the same Sangria as King Jeon finds himself drinking in his wife's drawing room on Sunday.

"Call Chef, fetch him up here." He waves to his assistant, keeping his eyes on the outside. He was deep in thought, his hands stoicly behind his back.

The Kingdom had been prosperous for over many years now, and war had not come close to threatening its borders in a lifetime. Negotiations were always successful, and quality of living was high. The work of a King, in a situation such as this, was to perfect the image of the royal family as strong rulers, and to paint his daughters as desirable to foreign heirs.

"Your Grace," the assistant called his attention, "Head Chef Sung." The dainty man bows and scurries off somewhere else.

Chef Sung is a portly man, who carries himself heaving with every step, his great belly inflating with each hefty inhale. He approaches the King, and kneels down to kiss his hand with his fat lips.

The King recoils in disgust, but quickly collects himself and his words. "Where are these apples from, is it France or Spain?" He demands.

"Neither, Your Highness." Mr.Sung lifts up his eyes. "They are from our Holy Kingdom; by order of Prince Jungkook, an entire cart was purchased of these apples and we have not been able to get rid of them." Tears threatened Chef Sungs eyes at the very mention of the fruit.

'Well, there's one thing the kid's done right.' King Jeon now faces the Chef, setting down his drink on a mahogany table, leaning against it casually. "Well! Good. I'd like to meet the owner of that cart, invite him to my Sunday brunch."

"Oh, yes, of course sir! You'll never see them in our kitchen aga--What?" Chef Sung takes out his handkerchief, waving it around in the air and drying his tears at once. "So you like them! Why...Yes! Yes, of course!"

Your father thought it would be valuable to have you around the kitchen, learning from the skilled men and women employed by the Jeon family. He only visited once a week to drop off fresh produce, (he'd been officially hired to handle restocking of goods) but you, after showing promising signs of being a gifted baker during one of your father's restocks, were granted scholarship by Ms.Kang to be her aid.

You were now, officially, a resident of the Jeon Estate, residing in the servant's quarters, immediately adjacent to the kitchen. This was convenient. It was far too convenient for a certain little Prince to get the idea of wanting a midnight snack and wandering downstairs.

One day, he does just that. He finds his way into the first bedroom to the right of the stairs facing the kitchen, and that happens to be your bedroom.

He pokes you awake. "Ow! Ow, whyyy~" You whine and toss yourself over to the other side of the bed. His irritating poking persists. You grab his fingers and your eyes shatter open.

You sit up, alarmed. "You could have me arrested, what the fuck are you doing?!"

"I wanted a midnight snack! Besides, I wanna talk to you." He pouts, still holding a small teddy companion.

"Fine. I'll bake you ONE sheet of cookies." You slip on your night shoes and shuffle to the kitchen, and Jungkook tags along.

By the time Jungkook's 18th birthday comes around, he's in the kitchen helping you whisk buttercream to top his cake while having a tease at the Austrian Princess' mole.

"You have one right under your lip, look!" You take a little buttercream from the bowl and stain the dark spot with it.

He licks it up and hastens to add, "it needs more sugar, lady!" as he turns to grab a puffy bag of confection sugar.

"You're impossible to please." Snatching the sugar away from him, you smirk. "You can gobble down as many sweets as you want when the ball commences. Remember, this is the year you're supposed to be keeping your eye out for a girl of a good fam--"

"Yada yada, must have hips for childbearing, yada yada yada..." He mocks the speech his mother had told him that morning when he got dressed.

"Exactly." You set your bowl aside to fix Jungkook's tie. "Yes, and that's your duty, as our heir."

You step back and examine Jungkook one more time. He'd grown so tall in the last year, his legs like spider's and he was just beginning to grow into his features. Handsome boy.

You, too, had grown into an elegant young woman. You had a poised complexion, ready-mannered and graceful. Your hands seemed out of place in your otherwise feminine frame, carrying an extra bit of girth from baking. You were 19 years old.

Marriage was becoming an uncomfortably frequent topic during your visits home, as your mother had married young, herself, she expected the same of you.

Truth be told, there were plenty of offers for your hand. You were a skilled and very esteemed individual, who had broken into thr artisinal class. But your father knew better than put a dowry on your happiness. So long as you worked, he saw no reason to marry you off just yet.

"Now, go. Your sisters must be worried sick! Go out there." You shoo him, pushing him out the door of the kitchen despite his flailing arms.

Throughout the party, you'd been carrying a platter of your own baked goods, serving them to the aristocrats attending the Princes' coming-of-age ball. Accents from all over Europe and some from Kingdoms as far East as Cyprus jubilantly engaged in artful conversation which filled the air with good spirits.

Jungkook, himself, was busy being introduced to as many women as possible, a medley of presenting duchesses, ladies, and even Princesses of your Kingdom. They were each more qualified than you'll ever be, ten-fold.

One was a Greek Princess, her hair cascaded in darling curls down her shoulders and her eyes were deep-set, her voice a flirtatious trill.

Another, a Prussian Princess', posture radiated excellency, and whose complexion sparkled like powdered snow. Jungkook greeted her warmly, pleased with her appearance.

Distracted, you tripped up your skirt and dropped the remainder of your pastries. With that, you stepped off to use the restroom.

The sound of Strauss' Rosen aus dem Süden faintly loomed in the air as you wiped tears from your waterline in the mirror. That was just the way it was, wasn't it? Princes come of age, and they find wives who they commit their lives to.

"Married men don't have friends who are girls." You say out loud, just to realize it. Jungkook was now expected to find a mate within the season, and he was, in fact, quite the eligible bachelor.

Little did you know that Jungkook had been keeping an eye out for you throughout the party, not only because you were carrying his favorite Danish pastires, but because he knew your company was his greatest comfort.

He's in the midst of greeting the Duchess of Kent when he excuses himself to go look for you. He finds your mess first, frowning as he realizes something has gone terribly wrong.

He catches you in the hallway, face puffy and shaky. He grabs your wrist to keep you from darting back to the kitchen.

"Please don't do this, it's my birthday, y/n." It's as if an unspoken rule had been broken between you, and he feels it. Something is making you uncomfortable. "Was it the girls? You told me about this, it's my duty to at least greet them and--"

"Yeah, you sure did greet the Prussian woman nicely." You speak through tears. "She's the girl you were born to be with, huh? Your birthright?"Jungkook is silent. "Every girl at that ball wants to be your wife, want to have your children. They haven't known you for a day and yet they're ready to be your bride."

You search Jungkook's eyes for any sign of coherence, hoping that he would defend against you, that he would speak up and tell you otherwise. No such argument comes.

You yank your arm from his grip and march to the kitchen to remake the pastries you spilled.

You had the job of clearing off all the tables upon the departure of the last guests. It is midnight, and the windows of the castle stream moonlight down on the carpet beneath your feet. The glow of candles soothe you as you hum the waltzes which echo in your mind. It's a brilliant evening.

The centerpieces of the tables were gardenias, lush rose-like flowers with yellow pistils.

Summer, 1809

"Jungkook, wait! You're going to make me trip!" You shout from the top of the hill.

"You've gotta come see before the sun sets! It's the only way we'll get there on time, now run!" Jungkook's speeding down the terrain towards the Sycamore tree which grew deep and wide beneath the banks of a great rushing river.

You groan and throw caution to the wind, rolling down the steep mount in your Sunday dress. Jungkook turns to watch you, a grin spreading across his handsome face. "Look at you!"

You land on your feet at the bottom and scurry off to join Jungkook under the grandfather tree, out of breath entirely. "Now, look what you made me do. You're such a boy, you know that?! Making me come out here just to see some bloody--"

Jungkook has plucked a gardenia and placed it behind your ear. "Would you shut up? We got here on time. Behold."

In all its glory, the sun bathes you in its vivacious rays, creating a feeling of heavenly bliss as it dips below the horizon. The sky blushes pink, its clouds mere whisps above you. Wind rustles the leaves of the grand tree, rousing the birds to chirp their afternoon song.

"Mom used to come here all the time with my Dad, because of these." Jungkook clasped the blooming flower in his tender hands.

After a while, he says "the bugs will come out soon, so we ought to go back," as if he's trying not to scare something away. He helps you up, and with one last look across the valley, you walk next to each other back to the East Quarters.

You take all the silverware and plates by the tub to the dish-washing station and toss all of the linen napkins into the washing machine. All you had left was to blow out the lights in leading upstairs.

"Prince! It is very late, and there are no guests left for you to entertain. What troubles you?" Jungkook's sitting on the stairs with his head in his hands, still wearing his best suit.

"I disappointed you, y/n...I didn't like any of them." He admits, lifting his head up to sulk at you. "I should have told you then, but I didn't want to make you upset!"

Did Jungkook mistake your jealousy for disappointment?

"I'm not upset because you didn't hit it off with the girls..." You sigh. A confession is due, and he's ready to hear the truth from you about how you feel about him.

"Well, the truth is, I didn't like any of the girls because I like you, y/n. But you know that, don't you?" You pause, asking him to elaborate.

"Remember when I bought all the apples because I wanted to be with you? Like...I told you that you were my consort and I kind of meant it?" He felt pathetic now, realizing that you weren't just ignoring his advances. "So you didn't friendzone me for 2 years, you actually didn't know that I liked you."

It was almost laughable, a situation you would read in one of your illegal novels which you kept tucked away in your pillow at night. "No, Kookie, I didn't." You admit to your insolence.

You can't bear to lead him on any longer. You needed to put duty over your own self interest for the sake of the kingdom, even if it shattered his hope. It was better this way.

"But, you do know that we can't ever be a thing, right? It's just silly." Your heart tightens with the words which fall out of your mouth. "It is. Nevermind what your parents would think, what would it do for your image? You're on the world's stage, Jungkook, and you're a selfish person if you think you can just throw all of your duties away to date a scum of the Earth like-- like me!" With your heart in your throat, dry your eyes with your sleeve. "And...I want to, I really really want to, more than anything else to love you, Jungkook. I love you! I...can't." Through the blur of your tears, the shapeless blob that Jungkook has become stands up.

Taking his thumb and swiping it under your eyes, he sighs. Words escaping him, he takes your trembling body against his chest and nestles his head in the crook of your neck. Your cold hands travel underneath his overcoat to hold his waist. The Princes' lips plant a gentle kiss on your neck, chaste yet deep and satisfying.

"I will not accept any bride if not you, my love." He draws back, meeting your fervid gaze. "To the world, I remain a bachelor for a few years."

"And after those years, Jungkook?" You ride your hands up to caress the man's jaw. "You will still love me after those years, and then what?"

"I don't know," he says, voice as soft as powder. "I don't know many things, y/n, that's why I need you to teach me." His palms are rubbing at your waist, beckoning you closer.

His breath quickening as you lean your body against his hold, and you figure it must be the wine he drank to calm his nerves. That was it, wasn't it? He was drunk.

"You're not drunk, are you?" Your face sours, really hoping it's not the case as you feel your body temperature rise.

"Y/N, I've only had a glass. You saw I was a wreck back there." His lips kept chasing yours in a dance you can't quite describe. "I have wanted to hold you like this since I saw you selling apples on the street. Give me the honor..." His forehead against yours and his strong hands supporting your back, he's already fucking you with his eyes.

"The pleasure of being your lover." He squeezes your waist tight with his forearms, planting brisk kisses behind your ear and breathing in your scent. He smiles against you. Your skin pebbles at his affectionate touch, purring softly as your eyes roll back in delight.

"Kookie..." You breathe, leaning on his broad chest. "Kook, the maids are wondering where I am, I have to go..." You slur, tugging at his collar.

He grunts in protest, taking your ear between his teeth and nibbling it.

"If you let me go, I'll steal some cake for you tomorrow at breakfast." If there's anything Jungkook likes more than Cream Ice, it was cake. He unravels you from his arms and nods, his eyes softening.

"Request my service tomorrow, from Ms.Kang. She's been sweet on me lately." You peck his cheek before stepping back. Your rouge has embarrassingly stained His Grace's cheek.

Jungkook bows and presses a kiss on your hand, eyes rising to meet yours. "Til' morrow, babe."

Jiyoo shakes you awake the next morning, handing you a cake and a note that reads: "Prince Jungkook has a commission he must discuss with you. Meet him at his chamber immediately."

Lacing on a simple corset over your nightgown, you try not to look too red in the face as you climb up the stairs to His Majesty's room. You'd be up there alone, as requested. The girls would absolutely start rumors based on that alone-- rumors which you realize are probably totally true. This was stuff of scandal, after all...

'There shouldn't be anything scandalous about love.' You decide as you rap on His Highness' door.

"Please enter...but only if you have my cake!" Jungkook says in his morning voice. He's so cute.

The simplicity of Jungkook's abode takes you by surprise. His bedroom is very well lit, a capital display of the flowered valley through his bay windows washed the room in gold, painting his porcelain white carpets and his cotton sheets a warm creme color. His drawers and vanity were etched in gold, with breathtaking detailing.

The Monarch himself was splayed across the bed, laying on his side casually. He held a glass in his hand, holding a white wine. He puts down his glass and sits up as your presence.

"We both know that you didn't come here as my servant." You lock the door behind you. "And I have no such commission to give you, darling." The innocence which undertones his usual speech is missing as he coaxes you towards him.

"This much I know, Your Majesty," You say, taking a bit of frosting on your index finger and smudging it on the Princes lips. His black eyes, as cunning as a viper, watch you dangerously as you push two fingers past his plush lips. He wraps his hands around your wrist and draws your hand away, his gaze fixating on you.

"Set the cake down." At his command, you carefully place the confection down on a nearby chest, feeling Jungkook's eyes on you, drawing you back towards his grip.

"Let me pull your laces apart," with your waist held by his Herculean hand, he hums "and then let me pull you apart. I want to memorize your pleasures and gratify your desires, I need it, y/n..." Your back flush against his chest and your thighs split, his hands knead into you as he litters your collar with his mark.

You gasp softly against the crook of his neck, giving into his hold of you. His hot tongue spreads under your jaw, closing into a hard kiss as his hands travel back up to undo your corset and free your tits.

One by one, his fingers pop open the buttons left on your gown until the collar hangs off-shoulder to expose your collarbone. At the sight of new skin, Jungkook's tongue darts to stain it.

His hands stagger above your breasts. "Is it okay if I touch you here?"

"Oh, Kookie, touch me everywhere~" Your hands form fists around Jungkook's shirt, beckoning him impossibly closer.

Grasping one ever so carefully, his thumb grazes your bud as he playfully bites under your ear. "ah-- ahh,"

Jungkook groans in response, he can't believe how cute you sound. Curious, he wants to hear more, so he traces your thighs and experimentally pushes up the outside your cunt.

You squirm, tensing up immediately in response. You bring your hands down to find the latch on his trousers and dip your hands below to rub him through his undergarments. He heatedly bucks up to meet your touch, a panting mess.

You face him now as he watches you ride his fingers while you grip his girth through his clothes. He takes you by the ass and places you on his prominent bulge, hips rolling into you as he hungrily kisses you, his firm hands grinding your core on his cock.

His face is a sinful red, panting under you desperately.

"I've been wanting to do this," His voice warbles through your touch, running your thumb along his underside. It's his turn to gasp. He sits up and collapses his lips into yours, softer than rose petals and his taste faintly like wine.

You place your hand on his chest, and his heart is pounding, a thin layer of sweat already forming on his honeylike complexion.

Hastily, you pull your dress over your head and lean back to allow him to familiarize himself with your stark form, a dainty chain hanging between your bosom. Jungkook bites his lips as he wriggles out of his clothing, desposing of it beside the bed.

He's giddy behind those sultry eyes, you know him well enough that he's overexcited to get inside of you. It goes straight to his cock, your playfulness as you feel up his bare shoulders and discover his abdominals, your fingers tracing his ridges with a sense of innocent wonder.

He takes your hands and looks at you in this way-- Butterflies fill your stomach instantly. Jungkook's thumbing at your pout with his intrepid fingers.

His eyes flutter when grip his base and submerge your upper body below his hips. You lick a long, thick stripe up his underside, causing his breath to hitch and his head to fall back on to the bed.

Those goddamn cupid's bow lips of his would whisper the dirtiest things under his breath, lewd thoughts that sounded completely alien coming from His Majesty's mouth, he said for you.

"Oh, such a pretty mouth~ It's so good, y/n, you swallow me so good--" he moaned like a mantra, trying to keep his hips from snapping up into you. Your hot, wet tongue wrapped around his throbbing cock was only a fantasy to him for years.

He fills your throat with his girth, his taste tantalizingly smooth. It leaves your mouth with a 'pop.' You struggle to keep your legs apart as you crawl up to kiss him.

He takes those fingers of his and slides his index and middle into you and languidly thrusts them, smirking against your lips. "Shit, you liked that, hmm..."

"Kookie...please," you whine as he squeezes your ass hard before smacking it. You yelp, the sting of his fingers radiating from your skin.

"I like it when you beg, y/n, it's so cute..." He pulls your ass up to his thighs. He's flush hard against your abdomen, already sticky with his precum and your spit. You marvel at the self control he has.

You don't finish your thought before he has his head inside of you, impaling you on his cock and stretching your entrance, hissing at how incredible it felt to have you around him.

His shaft reached pleasure points within you had yet to discover. You clench, feeling his tip brush against your cervix. "Wh... hngh," he groans, "how did you do that, do it again--" You wrap your legs around his thighs and clench around him, biting your lip. You watch as he shivers from pleasure, feeling his skin horripilate under your touch.

His thumb is softly circling above your clit as he pulls out of you carefully. He swirls back in, nestling himself inside your heat, hissing. "Ahh~ Jungkook~!" At the sound of his first name moaned out of your mouth, he groans and rolls his hips up to create messy friction. That familiar knot in your stomach tingles as he plays with the bundle of nerves buried within you.

He glances up at your ruined lips, clashing with them again as he lifts your knees up with his hands and thrusts nice and rough, making you yell with every jolt of his cock. The smell and sound of sex fills the room as he experiments with positions, laying you on all fours.

"Get your ass up for me." You obey, ever servile. You're reminded-- you're his servant. He owns your work, he owns your services, and now he wants you in the most lucrative way, he wants your soaked cunt around his imperial cock. He gets what he wants.

Jungkook's palms smack against your ass one more time, just to watch the way it jiggles for him. He smirks a little before he shoves himself into your pretty little cunt. You bury your face into the pillows in pelasure as he chases your orgasm with vigor, fingering your clitoris while you move your hips back to meet his hard thrusts.

You whine like a harlot, his cock allowing you every satisfaction as he works a head-spinning orgasm out of that cunt. "I'm gonna cum, Kookie~!" you warn as you spasm against his length, moans ripping from your throat as you coat him with your thick juices.

His hips stutter up and he just barely pulls himself completely from you as he paints your back white, a guttural groan escaping his mouth.

After a while of loud panting and scattered giggling, Jungkook reaches over for a wet cloth and cleans the both of you gingerly. You trail your hands up to caress his jaw and kiss his lips softly.

"You need to tell everyone that I had a long and extensive request for the Harvest party, that I wanted a lot of fall fruits and vegetables featured in the baked goods, make it as specific as possible and make sure that you mention that I want to meet with you again, over dinner." His labored breathing punctuate his words, as youd kisses consume him. "And..."

"And?" You cock an eyebrow, simpering.

"Doyouthinkmaybeyoucouldbringmesomemilktogowithmycake?" He mumbles, eyes glued on the bed.

"What?" (If you give a Kookie a Cookie...)

Disgruntled, he sighs and repeats: "Milk! Milk for my cake. I know it's moist cause you made it but I'm really thirsty, especially after..." His cheeks flush a cute pink. You wait for him to continue just to fluster him a little more. "Y/N, just please!" You can't ever refuse his pouty face.

Next week, Jungkook's got you pinned against the hallway wall, making out with you hungrily as his hands ride up your dress. Just across the hall, his Dad is negotiating war with Portugal over land in the West.

The next month, you have his cock buried in your throat underneath the table at an important conference about how to create jobs.

All this while the pressure for Jungkook to find a bride continues to rise as he reaches seniority, and as his father's grey hairs pronounce themselves.

Warm touches are always hidden away to the public eye, but often shared between two kindred spirits underneath the man in the moon's watchful eye. Jungkook, as he reaches his maturity, grows strong. His jaw sharpens, and his eyes darken. His hair grows long, and he gains weight. Now at the proud age of 20, Jungkook had become a man before everyone's eyes, including the eyes of foreign monarchs and their eligible bachelorettes.

One day, you're serving the Royal family at a private dinner, when the topic of marriage comes up for the first time since his birthday.

"Your mother has made friends with the mother of the Austrian Princess, and she's invited you to the cordial ball to introduce yourself to the Princess. An allyship with Austria would prove advantageous for our relations with France, so you are to make your best impression." The King wipes his mouth. Setting his fork down, he continues: "It is in the family's best interest for you to marry her, if the French Princess, Anastasie, does not present this season or the next." The Queen holds the King's hand firmly, reassuring him from his shoulder. She wears a slight frown on her face, her eyes worrisome, somber. The King hides his anxiety, as he's been accustomed to from decades of responsibility. Would this be the face of Jungkook soon?

For now, Jungkook's face is scrunching at the thought of marrying Anastasie. She's not the most delightful young woman, her imprudence ruined her enjoyment of any event. She couldn't keep an intuitive conversation about regional politics and domestic policy for the life of her. Her people were on the brink of overthrowing the aristocracy, he was sure of it.

"Yes, father," is what you hear from him before you disappear down the stairs to fetch desserts.

Jiyoo interrupts your quest for sweets with a letter, signed by His Grace. She has a naturally innocent demeanor, her cheeks rosy and her frame as delicate as a feather. "Y/N, you have another special request from His Majesty...can I ask you why you get so many of these?" She looks genuinely curious, not a single menacing thought behind those eyes.

"It's because the Prince really really loves his cake." I mean, technically it was true. Jungkook never passed up an opportunity to squeeze, smack, or dig his fingernails into your ass during your sessions.

"Oh." Jiyoo pouts. "So it's not because you're like, in love or anything?" Her eyes are glued to the floor. You were expecting this question eventually, as the other girls in the kitchen were already suspecting it. It was only a matter of time before word slipped into the girl's ears.

"As much as I enjoy the Prince's interest in my baking, it isn't my place to confess any sort of feeling for him." Your answer is straightforward enough, so Jiyoo nods and hands you the letter. Another request.

Outside the Palace, Winter came like the wind. Lakes froze over, and couples tied up their skates and danced on the ice. The trees were bare and brown, not a single leaf persisting through the chilling breath of Jack Frost.

Jungkook had left for the Winter Palace, to volunteer and raise spirits up in the North. As heir to the throne, he was to be Commander in Chief of the Royal Armed Forces, and therefore needed to undergo intensive training in order to boost morale.

You're back home, and in your wake is your father, who has now grown tangibly tired. He's been on a strict diet of warm vegetable soup for about three months, now. His eyes are sunken, but he still wears a subtle smile even during his most trying days.

Match girls make their rounds at night, you watch as the lamplighters illuminate the streets with their tall ladders and their taller peacoats. Shop windows glow warm shades of yellow and creme; inscriptions on the glass create shadows on the white snow.

"Wow. It's almost as cold as the King's heart out here." You step outside one day with a cup of tea, sneaking in a cheeky smirk. Yeah, good one.

"I heard that!" You turn towards the little voice. A child, maybe about 9 or 10 years old is pointing at you. You squint at it.

"Well, it's true..." You mumble. You have a bit of change in your pocket, so you walk towards a stand to buy a hot bun and a paper.

"Chilly today, hon...Best you take this on the house." The tenant hands you a steaming cake wrapped in a simple cloth and your paper. You stick the paper in your dress pocket and take back your change. You nod a 'thank you.'

You spill the contents of your pockets on the dining table and snatch the paper, snapping it open. Your eyes eagerly skim the headline: "Prince Jungkook Fires Up Royal Army." Below is an article detailing the happenings of His Majesty. All of it sounded very intense, the running, strategizing, first aid training...Was there anything Prince Jeon couldn't nail on the first try?

You set the paper down and pick up your now lukewarm tea. In the back of your mind you're coping with the fact that the Spring Solstice is next week, and that marks the beginning of Jungkook's last season as a Prince.

The King is ill with tuberculosis, and recovery is unlikely. If Jungkook is to marry, it is next season and that was final.

Sitting at the window of his Winter Castle study, Jungkook plays with a ring nestled between his fingers. He looks out onto the lake, as if he's trying to reach you with his gaze. His heart is tight knowing that it would be the season he chooses his bride. Actually, he'd already made up his mind long ago. If his duty was to marry, there was no way to evade such a responsibility. He had to fulfill it, despite his anxieties.

He straightens up and walks out of the hollow room with a firm step.

You awaken with the sound of horse's hooves thudding against the Earth. It is yet to be dawn, and in the distance, thunder roars mightily.

A figure wearing a long, black hood hoists itself off of the animal, tying it to a nearby post. It walks towards an obscure entrance, unknown to many staff.

Intrigued, you wrap a blanket around yourself and peek out at the stranger. His fingers are shorter than his palms, and that's when he tosses of his hood, his eyes set on you. "Y/N..."

You're bewildered by his guise, questions filling your head.

"I was horny, so I left camp" He sits down at the counter, catapulting a cookie into his mouth.

You roll your eyes. "And the guards let you?! Jungkook!" You whisper-yelled at him, readjusting your makeshift blanket-dress.

"Obviously not!" He puffed out his chest with pride. "I bribed them," he smirks.

"You're insufferable," you scoff, your eyes wandering down to observe his physique. His shirt is anything but conservative, highlighting the muscle he'd earned through laborious, sweat-inducing drills. You can feel his eyes on your face as you observe him.

"You can't hide it either," he crosses his arms. "You're standing in the kitchen with a blanket around your naked body." He flicks his tongue. He steps forward, putting a finger under your jaw so you're looking him in the eye.

Your eyes fill with lust as he speaks over your lips. "Look at yourself..." A crash is heard in the other room.

Jungkook's head darts up and in a flash, he disappears into the night.

'Fuck.' You gather your dress from the floor and shuffle back to your chamber.

The first event of the season commences with the most exaltant of spirits as friends of old greet each other with youthful smiles. Juicy exposés, enticing tales, and thoughtful greetings are exchanged in the most formal manner, and the conversation is lively; the most controversial topic of conversation, however, is the rumor that Jungkook is to marry this season.

So far, he's been to four different private residences within his own Kingdom and has been invited, by the secretary of King Louis XVII to meet their daughter. It would be an understatement to say that stakes were high for the pending King.

You were kneading your dough a little too hard thinking about it. "Not so rough, y/n!" Ms.Kang snatches the mixture from your hands. "What is up with you lately, you're so tense! It's really disrupting the kitchen's dynamic."

You shrug it off. "It's going to be hard sedating Anastasie's sweet tooth, I suppose."

"Well, you seem to be doing just fine dealing with Jungkook's addiction to cakes...She's perfect for him, really." Ms.Kang throws more flour on your kneading table and steps off. You give up on the dough, covering it with a cloth and letting it rise.

Jungkook is tapping his feet, munching on finger sandwiches as he waits on you to make an appearance.

"Dearest Prince, look, I am wearing Mediterranean violet!" A duchess shouts as she passes by him, to which he raises his eyebrows at. Another, with dark green eyes approaches and begins speaking rapidly in French at him. Frightened and undereducated, his canned response was: "Excusez-moi, Pouvez-vous répéter plus lentement s'il vous plaît," to which the duchess furrows her eyebrows before something else catches her attention, elsewhere.

Truth is, Jungkook is incredibly shaken at the thought of announcing his engagement tonight. Well, that and the fact that you had yet to pop out of the kitchen. Man, those finger sandwiches were good.

As the night progresses, Jungkook realizes that if he doesn't get up on that platform and say what he needed to say, he'd have to say it in London. Setting his fears aside, he plants himself on top of the orchestral stage and taps a champagne glass with a cheese fork. The music comes to a stop.

With conviction, he begins: "The time has come that I announce my engagement. To all of my beloved friends, who have introduced me to the most beautiful, talented, diverse, and benevolent ladies I've come to get to know over the years, I thank you from the depths of my soul." He swallows and continues, his confident voice masking his trembling. "The life of a Prince is defined by the virtues presented to him at birth. Those virtues are: duty, responsibility, grace, kindness, mercy and integrity." Here comes the part, oh shit.

"I am abdicating my throne to my Cousin, the Duke of Namseong."

Silence sweeps the room. You poke your head out to see what was going on.

"...to marry the love of my life, y/n." He points at you. Your face is cherry red, and you find yourself dropping those same Danish fucking pastries all over the carpet.

"Shit," you fall on your knees, plucking them from the ground one by one. You don't know whether to run as fast as you can or to present yourself, but your body seems to be currently doing the latter. You go along with it.

Jungkook takes your hand tenderly on the stage. "I am unable to perform my duties as King, and therefore am ineligible for the throne." His touch gives you the will to continue beside him. You feel the pure fear rushing through your love's veins, and he knows that this is the hardest thing he'll ever have to do, yet he stands by his announcement.

So, if Jungkook doesn't get to be King of this World, he at least will forever be the King of Your Heart.

But all this, of course...is all in Your, dear reader, Head.

~

a/n:

hope you enjoyed.

[nastybuckybarnes]

In a Heartbeat  -  Six

Pairing: Fireman!Bucky X Reader 

Summary: You’ve always been careful with your heart. With your condition, you don’t exactly have any other choice. The last time you let someone in, you paid the price. A price you don’t plan on paying again. Until Bucky comes in and shatters your carefully crafted world.

Warnings: Fluff, Language, Implied Smut, Angst, Injuries, Angst,

Word Count: 2.9K

A/n: hi here’s the second last part! I hope you guys enjoy. I’m in a weird place mentally right now because there’s been so much going on in my family life that I have no idea how to process. But I hope you guys enjoy this because I really enjoyed writing it. We will have one more part and then this series will be finished!!!

Series Masterlist

~*~

The smell of coffee pulls you from your sleep.

Eyelids flutter open and you’re confused for a moment until you remember last night. A small smile spreads across your face and you stretch in Bucky’s bed, taking note of the sore spots on your body.

You push yourself to a seated position and take a look around the room.

Bucky’s gone, but you can hear him rummaging around in the kitchen.

You slowly leave the bed and walk to the bathroom, stopping on your way to pick up your discarded clothes.

After you’ve finished, you make your way to the kitchen, your heart filling with warmth when you see him.

He’s got his bare back to you as he prepares something, wearing nothing more than a pair of sweatpants.

“Morning,” you whisper, trying not to startle him. He glances over his shoulder and smiles at you. “Good morning.�� You walk over to him, wrapping your arms around his torso and pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

He stops whatever he was doing and holds your hands, leaning into your touch and sighing.

“How’d you sleep last night?” He asks after a moment of silence, pulling a pan off of the hot element then turning around to look at you.

You smile up at him and he swears his heart melts.

You're so beautiful. Glowing and angelic in the early morning sunlight peeking through a partially opened window.

“Not too bad at all.” He smiles, leaning down to press a soft and sweet kiss to your lips.

“Yeah, same here. Got far more sleep than I should’ve, though,” he murmurs, trailing kisses down your neck. A soft sigh slips past your lips and your head falls back, granting him more access.

His hands find your hips and he hoists you up onto the counter, knocking a glass off and sending it shattering to the floor.

“Jesus!” You exclaim, jumping at the sound and hitting your forehead against Bucky’s. The two of you groan, the brunet’s eyes widening with fear.

“I’m sorry!” He exclaims, looking between the broken glass, your face, and your chest as if to see if your heart’s about to give out.

You smile softly at him and cup his cheeks gently, pulling his face up until he’s looking at you.

“It’s okay, James. I promise I’m not as fragile as you think. I can handle a few loud noises.”

He sighs and bumps his nose against yours a few times before lowering his head to the crook of your neck.

“I just don’t want anything to happen to you. I worry about you, (Y/n).” You wrap your arms around his torso tightly, one hand finding its way into his hair to massage his scalp.

“I worry about you too. Of the two of us, I think you’re more at risk than I am.” He chuckles against your clavicle and shakes his head, pressing his lips against your skin while mumbling “it’s not a competition to see who’ll die first.” Then he pulls away to stand upright and look at you with those piercing blue eyes of his.

“But just because my line of work is dangerous doesn’t ever mean that I don’t worry about you.” You lean up and kiss him softly, ending the conversation as your lips move more passionately against his.

He pulls away after a long moment, eyes dark and lips kiss-swollen.

“You stay up here while I clean this up. Then... how about we take this to the bedroom?” You nod, bottom lip pulled between your teeth as you watch his muscles flex while he cleans up the broken glass.

~*~

You sit in front of your apartment in Bucky’s truck, his hand in yours as the two of you talk about your heart.

“I’m not as fragile as you think I am, James,” you reiterate for the thousandth time. He sighs, thumb rubbing over the back of your hand.

“I just want you to be safe, doll. I want what’s best for you.” His words anger you far more than they should and you pull your hand from his grasp.

“I wish everyone would stop assuming that they know what I need. Everyone always thinks that they know what’s best for me but they don't! I know what’s best for me. I’m sick of being treated like a child because of my illness. I just want someone to take my side for once and let me be me and live my life the way I want to! Is that really so much to ask?!”

Your outburst has your heart beating hard and, as if sensing that, Bucky tries desperately to defuse the situation.

“Doll, I do have your side, I just-”

“No! That should be it! If you had my side you wouldn’t be justifying treating me like a child, James.” He frowns, reaching for your hand only for you to pull it out of reach.

“I-I’m just gonna go.” You leave his truck without another word, frustrated and flustered but not willing to go back on what you said.

He sits in front of your building, three little words on the tip of his tongue and absolutely flabbergasted with the way the day has taken a turn. Things started off so well this morning.

You rake your hands through your hair, glancing at your phone as it starts to ring.

You can’t talk to him right now. Maybe later, but not right now.

Half an hour later, Natasha is blowing up your phone too.

You don’t want to talk to them.

You feel like shit for blowing up on Bucky like that but you needed to get your point across. All your life you’ve been treated like a child, even into adulthood. Nat hovers around you like a mother hen and now Bucky’s doing the same.

It absolutely isn’t unreasonable of you to want them to treat you like an equal. As much as they say that you’re more than your illness, you know that they still see it whenever they look at you, and you absolutely hate that.

~*~

“Miss (Y/l/n), can I use the washroom?” You glance over at the little girl before smiling softly.

“Not until Tommy comes back, Sammy. We can’t have too many of you out at one time, okay?” She nods, thumb in her mouth as she resumes her colouring.

You’re doing your rounds, making sure all the students are doing well when the blaring of the fire alarm goes off.

A few kids scream in fear, but you shush them quickly, eyes finding Wanda’s as ice shoots through your veins.

You’re not supposed to have a fire drill today.

“Okay everyone, single file. Follow me. Leave everything where it is, okay? We’ve gotta get out just like we always practiced. Right outside onto the field, c’mon,” Wanda says, standing up and leading the way out of the classroom. You stay at the back, waiting until all the children are out of the room before closing the door and following after them.

You descend the stairs, dark clouds of smoke already filling the hallways and making kids cry.

The school is hectic and chaotic as all the teachers try to get their students to safety.

As you reach the field you stop dead in your tracks, looking at Wanda with wide eyes.

“Tommy’s in the bathroom,” you whisper, horror plain as day on your face as you turn back to the burning building.

Smoke is pouring out of a few open windows, and the last few people are trickling out, some of them crying, some of them laughing, thinking it’s a game.

Sirens fill the air but you’re already running back to the building, knowing he’d be far too terrified to leave the safety of the bathroom.

“(Y/n) no! Wait for the fire department!” She shouts, but it’s too late. You’re already back in the building, a wall of heat slamming into you.

You take a few careful breaths then take the stairs two at a time in your haste to find the boy.

Your heart is already beating far too fast, you know that, but you can’t stop. Not now. Even as the smoke rises and the air gets stuffier you continue up the stairs.

Tommy’s somewhere in the burning building and you’re not going to leave him.

“Tommy!” You shout, squinting as a cloud of black clouds your vision right as you reach the second floor.

You crouch down, pulling the hem of your blouse up to cover your mouth and nose. It’s both a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, it prevents smoke inhalation, but on the other hand, it’s preventing you from getting the oxygen you need.

“Tommy!” You try again, pushing your way through the familiar halls until you get to the boys’ bathroom.

You hear faint crying and you swear your heart shatters in your chest.

“Tommy!” You push into the bathroom and find Tommy cowering against the far wall, tears staining his cheeks.

“M-Miss (Y/l/n)!” He scrambles to his feet and launches himself at you, hugging you around your waist and sobbing against your chest. You kneel down with him, hugging him tightly and rubbing his back.

“I-I didn't know wh-what to d-do and I was s-scared!” He cries, sniffling against you and holding onto you for dear life.

“Shh, it’s okay. I’m here. You’re okay. But we need to leave. Do you remember what your daddy told you about fires? Cause I’m gonna need you to be my personal fireman, okay?” He sniffles a few times then nods, pulling away to wipe the tears from his eyes and take a few deep breaths.

“Alright. Let’s go.” You push out of the bathroom and are instantly hit with intense heat and the stench of smoke.

You push Tommy’s head down and as out of the smoke as you can and lift your other hand to shield your eyes as you try to find an exit.

The staircase has been engulfed by the fire, the flames devouring the only exit besides a window. But those are bolted shut to prevent any accidents.

Your chest tightens and your vision blurs, heart hammering much too hard in your chest. Your ears begin to ring and your knees buckle and you know you need your pills. Or at the very least, you need to sit down.

“The art room! It has the big windows and the heavy doors! Daddy says that heavy doors block out the smoke better!” You nod and follow him into the art room, collapsing on your knees as soon as the door is closed. You can’t breathe. The air just won’t find your lungs.

“C’mon miss (Y/l/n)! The window! We need to break it cause then they can hear us.” He grabs your hand and yanks with all his might, and his determination is enough to have you forcing yourself to your feet and banging on the window with as much strength as you can muster.

Tommy’s pounding against it with all his might, and you can’t help the tears that finally fall down your cheeks as your legs give out.

“Keep trying, Tommy,” you rasp, chest aching and heart pounding. He looks at you in complete fear, not sure what to do.

“Miss (Y/l/n)?” He asks softly, crouching down next to you as you cough softly. You take a few slow breaths, your heart stuttering in your chest.

“Keep going, Tommy. You’ve got this. You’re a fireman, just like your daddy and your Uncle Bucky.” Bucky. More tears fall down your cheeks at the thought of him.

Your eyes fall closed, head lolling to the side as the last of your energy leaves you.

You wish you could apologize to him. Tell him that you love him, that you appreciate everything he does for you.

The ringing in your ears grows until it’s deafening. Until the sound consumes you and pulls you gently into darkness.

~*~

The fire bell rings and the men are all on their feet, grabbing their gear and pulling it on as swiftly as they can.

“Rogers! I want you to sit this one out,” Chief Fury says, his arms crossed over his chest. The men all slow for just a moment before resuming their haste, Steve the only exception.

“What? Why?” He’s never been asked to sit out of a job before. Fury waits until the other men have piled into the firetruck.

“Now, it could very well be nothing but the call... it’s for the elementary school. I know your little one goes there and I can’t have you on the cal- Rogers!” Steve’s got his suit on and he’s in the truck in record time, jaw clenched hard and hands balled into tight fists.

The men are silent, having pieced it together and not wanting to argue with their captain.

Steve will take the heat from Fury after. All that matters is making sure his son is safe.

Almost as if realizing that there’s not one, but two people emotionally invested in this case, the eyes turn to Bucky. The brunet has his own eyes pinned between his boots, fingers of his flesh hand trembling slightly.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Sam whispers, his usual joking demeanour long gone.

The rest of the ride is silent, but as soon as they pull up to the school the men are jumping out and Steve is barking orders at them.

“Sam, you go make sure the building’s empty. Buck, you-” but the brunet is sprinting over to Wanda, a look of desperation on his face when he sees the tears on hers.

“Where is she?” He demands, his chest heaving and his entire world on the brink of collapsing.

“Sh-she went back inside to find Tommy. They never c-came back out.” He stumbles back a step, directly into Steve who waits impatiently for the news.

“She went in to find him,” Bucky whispers, the world around him going quiet as he turns and focuses solely on the burning building, searching for any possible sign of you.

Steve’s face falls, his heart crumbles and his whole world shatters.

“Tommy.”

The two race to the building only to be stopped by Sam and Clint.

“Entire entrance and staircase are up. There’s no way to get in there unless we break a window.”

Steve takes a few careful breaths then nods.

“Work on getting it as contained as possible. We’ve got at least two still inside.” Sam’s heart hurts for the blond as he races around the building like a chicken with his head cut off.

“Tommy!” He shouts, hands cupped around his mouth to amplify his voice.

“Wait, Steve! Look!” Bucky points to a spot on the side of the building where a second thinner stream of smoke is leaving the building, this one in a different direction than the others.

A second opening in the building.

The two are running to investigate, and Steve’s heart bubbles.

“Tommy!” The little boy is crying in the broken window, head completely out to suck in as much fresh air as he can.

“Daddy!”

“Hold on, Tommy! We’re gonna get you!” He drops his head to his radio and calls for the truck to be pulled around.

“Daddy, Miss (Y/l/n) won’t wake up!” The little boy cries, his face dirty with tears and ash.

Bucky can’t breathe. He thinks he might be sick.

He’s definitely going to be sick.

He stumbles away from the building, away from the people and anyone who can see him and collapses on his knees, dry heaving into the grass while the others pull the truck around.

Steve's up the ladder and at the window, telling his son to move out of the way so he can break the window further.

“C’mon Buck. We���ve got a job to do. C’mon.” Sam helps him to his feet and Bucky nods, grinding his teeth together in a pathetic attempt at hiding his tears.

“Sam! Come give me a hand!” Steve’s voice says through the radio. Bucky follows to the truck, mind numb, body numb, and ears ringing.

“She’s in here, but her pulse is sporadic. We’ve gotta get her out now.” That lights a fire under the brunets ass and he’s nearly throwing himself to the truck right as Steve starts climbing down, Tommy clinging like a koala to his back with one arm, the other wrapped in a sloppy sling.

The ambulances are ready, lights flashing and stretchers at the ready.

Steve rushes his son over, his oxygen mask pressed against the six-year-old’s face.

“Set him down, c’mon.” He does as instructed and takes a half-step back to allow the paramedics room to inspect him.

Bucky’s eyes move from his nephew up to the window where Sam disappeared, his heart in his throat as he finally sees movement.

Sam emerges, his oxygen mask on your face and your limp body strewn over his shoulder.

A familiar head of red hair is pushing a stretcher right to the ambulance, ready to take your body as soon as Sam’s down.

He lays you down carefully and Bucky’s immediately at your side, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Buck, give us some space, okay?” Nat whispers, her voice fully professional, though he can see the pain in her eyes. He takes a deep breath but nods, stepping back and watching as you get rolled away.

A hand is on his shoulder and he glances over at the person.

“C’mon. We’ve got a fire to put out.”

[jae-daddy]

Stuck (M)

im jaebum oneshot

masterlist

pairing: im jaebum x reader genre: angst, smut, fluff? plot: after a terrible incident you and jaebum feel stuck in a relationship rotting away. you can’t take a step forward or a step back, you’re only stuck  a/n: I felt like writing something that I can put out instantly so here you go. I feel like I've written smut after so long... oh well, hope y’all like it <3 not edit

You sat by the window sill, your eyes followed the raindrops, slowly tracing the glass. You brought a finger up and placed it where a drop lay resting, waiting for another drop to come and propel it down to the rest of the droplets that disappeared. 

You wondered if it wanted to stay there, remain there untouched until the sun came out and dried it away into non-existence. Or if its waiting for that one special drop, maybe its the one above it, just a few centimetres away, or maybe it’s still to fall from the heavens. 

From the other side of the glass, you felt the droplet. It was just like you; stuck. It didn’t know what it needed, but it needed something, like you needed someone. 

You gaze adjusted to the red car that pulled into the driveway. You watched him, stay in the drivers seat for a moment too long. His eyes were trained on the rain beating against the window of the car. 

He couldn't see you, or at least he didn’t notice you. 

He didn’t look towards the house. 

He stayed there, and you watched him, waiting. 

You shifted your finger from the droplet to where Jaebum was, and he felt the same; stuck. 

You took in a deep breath as he finally found the strength to get out of the car. You didn’t blame him; you didn’t want to be here either. You didn’t want to come back to this house. 

You looked back at the droplet to find it gone as a new trail started down the window. 

You got up from your seat as Jaebum opened the door. He shook the rain of him, and you wondered if he remembered that you hated it when he did that. It reminded you of a dog, all wet and smelly, but he did it anyway. 

You didn’t say anything about it. You hid away your frown and instead smiled, as you walked towards him, “Welcome back, Jay.”

Jaebum gave you a tight line smile, and you were already tired. You knew exactly how this night was going to go. It had been the same for weeks now, probably a month, you couldn’t remember. 

It’s all a blur how this started or when this started. All you knew was one morning Jaebum was kissing you goodbye, and the next day he just stopped.

“How was work?” You asked, but regretted it instantly. You bit your lip wondering if you were being annoying, bothering him after a long day of work.

You knew how stressful work got sometimes. You used to work together until a few months ago, until you stopped bleeding. 

You would never forget the look on his face when he saw the pregnancy test in your hand. When he took the it from you and stared at the positive sign for minutes. You sat next to him, not touching him. 

You were scared; frightened that he didn’t want this baby. You hadn’t planned for a baby until two more years, but now that it was here, earlier then expected, you were scared. 

But then he finally turned towards you. 

The tears ran down his cheeks, blurring his vision as he tried to hold them back. And then he smiled so brightly, that all the tears he was holding in those beautiful eyes spilled out. 

“We’re going to have a baby,” his voice was barely above a whisper. You nodded, tears falling down your cheeks. You were so relieved Jaebum wanted this child. You were so happy you were going to be a mother, you were going to have a child with Jaebum. 

You wiped Jaebum’s cheeks as you held his face in your hands, but it was pointless. New tears came down and wet them instantly. Jaebum fell off the bed as he went down on his knees. He wrapped his arms around your waist, hid his face against your stomach and cried. 

You fell on him, hugging him back as your own tears soaked through his shirt. 

He looked up, his eyes red and cheeks swollen, “I love you, y/n.” 

His voice was raspy and raw, and you smiled. Your was voice just as trembling as you answered, “I love you too, Jaebum.” 

You remember the golden lit in his eyes. The way it used to sparkle and shine when he looked at you. You remembered the way he would walk home everyday, hold you in his arms and litter you with kisses. 

Jaebum didn’t hum anymore, and you didn’t ask him too. You would just end up crying if you did. You weren’t ready for that, you weren’t ready for Jaebum. 

As much distance Jaebum put between you two, you didn’t do anything to lessen it. You wanted to remain on the other side of the shore and see him from the distance. It hurt to much to see him, to talk to him, to pretend that such a big part of you both was now missing. 

Your gift from the universe was taken back. 

Maybe it wasn’t their time yet. They will come back one day, and once again bloom in your belly. One day, when it comes back, you will love it all over again, just the same, but right now it was gone, and you missed them. 

Jaebum missed it too. 

And now you mourned the loss of someone who never even properly entered into your life. But it was already a part. 

They were in the buckets of paint Jaebum had bought. In the wooden crib he had started on. In those moments where you both lay in bed together, thinking of names, thinking about what kind of parents you will be, thinking about how much love you would give to the little bean. 

And now those memories haunted you both. 

Jaebum simply shrugged like he had for days now, and mumbled, “It was normal.” 

You didn’t sigh.

You walked back to your seat, and went back to watching the rain. 

It was raining a lot today. It didn’t seem like the rain will stop anytime soon. It was early evening, but the low hanging clouds already made the world shadowed in darkness. 

You missed the sunshine. 

You missed Jaebum too. 

“I think you messed up,” you whispered to the dark stormy clouds, but you were taking to whatever was beyond it. 

“Did you say something?” Jaebum asked from the kitchen. You blinked, remembering Jaebum was there; that he was actually there and not a mirage. Things can change, not everyday has to be the same as yesterday. 

You swallowed, suddenly feeling nervous to talk to Jaebum. You had told this man every last one of your secrets, there was nothing about you that he didn’t know, but today you were nervous. 

it used to be easy back then. You never had to think twice, you wouldn't even consider the thought and just blurt it out to Jaebum as soon as it came to your head. Jaebum would laugh, agree, or call you crazy, and then tell you his thoughts. It was so easy back then. 

“I think they messed up,” you said a bit louder. Your fingers fidgeted in your lap as you waited through the silence that followed your words. 

Jaebum didn’t say anything for a long minute. He didn’t say anything, but you heard his movements stop as he took in your words. And then you heard his footsteps approach closer behind you. 

“Who did?” He asked, stopping at the doorway of the kitchen. This was the closest you two have been in weeks. For once you were looking at one another, seeing each other, talking to each other about something that wasn’t mundane like closing the toothpaste lid. 

You didn’t reply instantly, so Jaebum took a hesitant step closer to you, “It happens sometimes, y/n. It’s more common than we think.”

“I know,” you nodded, content and understanding. Jaebum frowned, and you wondered if he thought your calmness meant you were loosing it. But you had come to terms with it, it was okay. 

But it wasn’t. 

“They took too much,” you whispered, looking out to the skies again. 

“Y/n, are you,” Jaebum walked closer towards you, he bent onto his knees in front of you, and for the first time in a long time, his skin touched yours, “Are you okay?”

His brown eyes bore into yours, and you finally breathed. It felt as if the clock finally began to tick again. It felt as if the time that had been frozen was finally melting and moving forward. Jaebum’s eyes finally looked warm and golden instead of the darkness that had been haunting him. 

You placed your hand over his. Jaebum flinched, but then softened as his eyes looked into yours. You took in how sad he looked and your heart hurt. There were no smiles, no dreams, nothing. Only lips pulled into a line, and eyes lined with dark circles from sleepless nights. 

“They made a mistake,” you could barely hear your own voice, but in the silence that filled your lives, Jaebum heard you. His brows furrowed, his lips tighten, and you saw him be stricken with fear. 

He was scared he was going to lose you to insanity. 

“They took too much from us.” 

“I...” Jaebum spoke softly, his thumb caressing your cheek. He bit his lips, scared, as he continued, “I don't understand.” 

“The universe,” you told him, tears filling your eyes, “when they took our baby, they took a lot more with them.” 

Jaebum didn’t say anything as he wiped the tear that fell from your eyes. You saw Jaebum’s eyes also get teary, this was the first time you were talking about it to each other after weeks. This was the first time since that first week you found out, first week since your grieving became mourning, that you mentioned the baby. 

“Jay, they took us too,” your chin started to tremble. 

“Hey, baby,” Jaebum spoke, holding your face up in his hands. He shook his head as he swallowed, “I’m right here.” 

“They took our love too, Jaebum,” you whispered, your nails digging into his hands for strength to continue and not fall apart. “We don’t love anymore.” 

A tear slid down Jaebum’s face, “Do you not love me anymore?” 

You snorted at that, genuinely smiling for the first time in weeks, Jaebum’s lips quirked. 

“I do,” you swallowed the lump in your throat, “I love you just as much, if not more, but Jay, you don’t...”

“I do.” 

“You don’t,” you shook your head away from his hands. You stared at your fingers that fell onto your lap, “You don’t look at me anymore. You don’t talk to me anymore. I see you everyday, and you just don’t care anymore... 

“I feel stuck because I don’t want to freak you out by reaching out before you’ve healed. But every day, I can feel you drifting away, and I... I can’t stop thinking... that maybe somewhere.... deep down-”

“No.” Jaebum said, firmly, “Never.”

You looked up at Jaebum, and found him staring at you with fire in his eyes, “I have never, and I never will. The doctors said it wasn’t anyone’s fault, nothing caused it. You didn’t do anything.” 

“Then why don’t you talk to me?” You asked, softly. 

“I’ll talk to now, if that’s what you need.”

“No,” you shook your head, as more tears fell from your eyes. “Do it because you want to, because you want me to be a part of your day.”

Jaebum didn’t say anything, and after a moment he got up and walked away. 

You leaned back into your seat, drawing your knees to your chest. You buried your face into them as your body began to shake. The rain wasn’t stopping, and the winds were causing the rain to loudly fall against your window. All the droplets that were waiting washed away. 

You felt the seat next to you sink, and you lifted your head to find Jaebum in front of you. Your chest hurt, it felt as if someone had stabbed a knife into and kept on turning it round and round, taking pleasure in seeing you wither in pain. 

“I went to get tea,” Jaebum spoke as you watched him, “Have you eaten today?” 

You thought about it, before shaking your head. 

Jaebum nodded, before lifting up a plate of sandwich towards you, “Here.”

You wiped your runny nose on the long sleeve of your hoodie before taking the plate, “Thanks.” 

Jaebum’s eyes remained on the sleeve of your hoodie and you gasped, “Oh, sorry I completely forgot that you didn’t like that.” 

“It’s okay,” Jaebum managed a smile, “you don’t like it when I shake water out of my hair.” 

You managed a smile back. 

You took a bite of the sandwich and chewed it slowly, watching Jaebum as he ate his in small bites, “Are you okay?” 

He sighed, before placing his sandwich back into his plate, “I just feel so... I don't know how to describe this feeling. It’s not sadness, not as much anymore at least. It’s this feeling like I’m waiting for something, or more like someone is waiting for me. And it feels weird in my chest, like I have to be somewhere, but I don’t know where.”

You smiled at that. 

“You’re like the rain,” was all you said. 

Jaebum looked over at you, and after a long moment chuckled shaking his head. 

“And what are you?” 

“A droplet, waiting for you to get to me,” you placed your plate on the table, as you sighed. “I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I wasn't there for you.”

“It’s okay,” Jaebum placed his plate down too, “I wasn’t there for you too, I should’ve fought harder to be next to you.” 

“I hated coming home. I hated waking up and being in this house, in this room,” you told him, and Jaebum’s eyes shone with hurt. “I hated everything about this life, except you.”

“I hate coming back to his house everyday,” Jaebum said, and your heart sunk. You knew that though, you had guessed that much. He would hate this place as much as you, “Every time I thought of not coming back, I thought of you. And as soon as I thought of you, I only saw you.”

“I only see you too,” you whispered back. 

You and Jaebum remained like that for a long time, watching each other as the rain gently fell outside. There were no more words said, no more actions done, but somehow you both were in motion. 

Jaebum watched as you got up and leaned closer to him. You watched with hesitant eyes, your gaze drooping to his parted pink lips, almost waiting for you. You placed a hand on his cheek as you softly placed your lips against his. 

“I love you,” you said, looking into his eyes as you leaned back. 

Jaebum pulled you back in as he whispered, “I love you too.” 

Jaebum kissed you, and you had to hold back the moan at the back of your throat. He placed a hand on the back of you head, pulling you in as he deepened the kiss. 

You let him pull you against him. Your chest meeting his as you settled onto his lap, straddling him. Your mouth opened as your tongues collided. A moan left Jaebum as your fingers gently pulled against his hair. 

Jaebum’s lips shifted from your lips, and towards your neck. You arched your head to the side as he kissed your throat, his tongue licking your skin with every kiss. You moaned, your eyes rolling back, as you closed your eyes. 

Your body burned for him; you burned for him. 

You wanted him closer. You wanted him inside you. You wanted him intertwined with your soul. 

Your fingers reached down touching his bulge beneath your hips. You ran your fingers over the shape, and Jaebum groaned as you pressed your hands against it. 

Jaebum’s hands removed the sleeves from your shoulders, making the loose dress fall, revealing your breasts. He wasted no time as he took a hard nipple in his mouth. His hot tongue swirling around the hard bud, making your mind blur with pleasure. 

You moaned, as he other hand held the other breast, rubbing the hard bud between his fingers. He kissed your breasts all over, worshipping every inch of it. You moaned; a hand in his hair, tugging it slightly whenever he drew the buds between his teeth. The other hand expertly unzipping his pant and freeing his strained cock. 

You held it in your hand, running your thumb over the tip, spreading the pre-cum over the tip. Jaebum hissed, throwing his head back as you touched him. You ran your hand over his length a few times, before positioning yourself over him. 

You rubbed his dick dripping in premium against your wet slit. Jaebum’s hips bucked feeling how wet, hot and ready you were for him. You placed him at your centre before slowly sinking down on him. 

You gasped as he slowly filled you in, as Jaebum let an out a throaty, “Fuck.”

You rested your hands on Jaebum’s shoulder, and sat down on his dick completely. You moaned, your eyes rolling back as you felt Jaebum completely inside you. 

You missed him inside you. 

You opened your eyes to find him watching you already. Your lips parted in a silent prayer, as you rose on his cock before sliding back done. Your body melted into his, your chest pressed against his, your eyes focused on each other. 

You went slow at first, slowly taking in the feel of him. Your hands running along his chest, his back, into his hair. His hands feverishly touching your everywhere, as if he was trying to remember every part of your body. 

Jaebum leaned forward, bringing your right breast into his mouth. You gasped loudly, as a hand gripped his hair while the other arm wrapped around his shoulder. You began to go faster, getting an approving groan from Jaebum. 

His hand went around, squeezing your ass and helping you find a faster and better rhythm. You gasped, groaned, and cursed God’s name again and again as you felt something tighten in your stomach. 

Jaebum moved away from your chest, and brought a hand to your hair. He pulled your hair back, making you look into his dark eyes as your face contoured in delicious pain. 

“Fuck, I missed you,” Jaebum groaned, as he sloppily kissed along your neck. You moaned, your nails digging into his back. Jaebum leaned back, watching you for a moment, making your cheeks flush. 

“I love you, y/n,” he leaned up kissing you as if the end of the world was near. His arms tightened around you, his fingers wrapping tighter around your hair as he pulled you in closer. You kissed him back just as harshly, holding him just as close. 

Jaebum leaned his forehead against yours, and watched you get closer to the edge. His fingers tightened around your hair as he grunted, “Come for me, y/n.” 

A loud groan left you, as you entire body tightened. Your fingers latched onto his tresses, as your nails bit harder into his skin. Jaebum didn’t mind, he continued moving his body, letting you ride out your high as your body began to shake. 

Your pussy squeezed him in tighter, and Jaebum grunted reaching for your lips again as he kissed you harder, and became undone. 

You both remained in each other’s arms as Jaebum fell back against the sofa. You lay on his chest, hearing his heart beating loudly. You placed your hand over it, letting its heat sink into your skin. 

It felt just the same as you in this moment. 

“I love you, Jaebum,” you whispered, snuggling in closer to him. Jaebum slid his pants and underpants off, and took your dress off before laying on the sofa. He pulled the blanket you had been using alone for weeks, and covered it over your tangled bodies. 

He placed a kiss on your forehead and wrapped his arms around you, “I love you too, y/n.” 

After a moment, he added, “More than anything, no matter what.” 

“No matter what,” you echoed, placing a kiss on his neck. You closed your eyes, tired, and took a deep breath in. You missed his scent, his heat, you missed everything about him. 

As you lay in his arms, as the heat from his skin seeped into yours, you finally left alive. You had finally began moving. The sun hadn’t come out yet, but you were already home, with him. 

[farfromharry]

I like it when you hold me | Roommate!Harry fic

Summary: the three times you needed harry to hold you and the one time he needed you to hold him.

Word count - 3,251

Warnings - language? anxiety attack, brief mention of painkillers

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Your day today didn't consist of much. You’d gotten up early this morning along with your roommate to help him prepare for a high profile photoshoot he’d had booked for weeks. You knew he was nervous, panicking so much for the past few days as the day grew closer.

You made sure he ate breakfast and checked he had all his equipment before he left, helping to take that burden off of him.

He’d kissed your head as a thank you for the help just as he left, and then you were left to yourself for the rest of the day.

“You’re an angel, I’ll see you later.” You forced another hug out of him, wishing him good luck again, not that he’d really need it.

“Can’t wait to hear all about it.”

After that, things started to go south for you around eleven, your stomach beginning to cramp painfully as you tidied up the mess you’d left in the kitchen with Harry the night before. To try and settle the boy's nerves you may have had one too many alcoholic drinks while having a film night, but now being the one to clean it all up you were definitely regretting your drunk selfs actions.

You didn’t normally track your periods as frequently as you should, so this definitely caught you off guard, but you knew now any plans you had for the rest of the day were ruined.

After you sorted things out and took some painkillers, you crawled into your bed with your heating pad, pressing it up against your lower stomach with hope of at least some relief.

You didn’t even get a wink of sleep, the painkillers not working strong enough or long enough to make sure you were deep into a nap before your cramps began again.

You ended up spending most of the day staring at the different views of your room, just waiting and counting down the seconds until your roommate got home.

When he arrived back a few hours later, Harry expected to find you somewhere about the apartment, possibly expecting to find you watching a film on the couch where he’d be able to tell you all about his day.

When he didn’t find you he called out for you, getting a quiet ‘here’ in response from your room. He trudged to your room with a grin on his face, ready to see his favourite person’s face after a long day of going without, but he was instead met with the sight of you curled up in bed with a look of pain plastered all over your face.

He pushed down any excitement he had for the job he’d done today that he wanted to tell you about, deciding it could wait and you should instead be his priority right now.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, kneeling beside where you were laid in bed, gently stroking your hair. You gave him a weak smile, lifting your blanket to show him the heating pad you had pressed against your abdomen.

He pouted sympathetically, knowing exactly the time of month when you’d get that out, placing his lips onto your head lovingly.

“Do you need anything?”

You adored how attentive Harry was to you at this time of the month when you really just needed some extra loving.

“Painkillers and cuddles, please.” He thought you looked so innocent wrapped up in the covers of your bed just asking him to give you love and it made his heart ache.

“Coming your way.” You smiled as you watched him walk out of your room, leaving you to your own devices for a few minutes. He came back no longer than five 5 minutes later. A mug of tea in his hand, some painkillers and a change of clothes for himself.

“Take two of these, ‘m just gonna change and I’ll be back.” You nodded your head, shifting from your comfortable position to do as he instructed. He came back in much comfier clothes than early in no time, climbing underneath the covers of your bed beside you.

“Now, someone said they needed a cuddle?”

You laughed, curling into the man’s body as his arms snaked around your form. You had to wait a while for the tablets to begin to do their job, so your stomach was still aching despite the little things Harry had done for you.

“Do you need anything else?” he asked, looking so softly into your eyes. You smiled, taking the hand that was resting on your cheek and guiding it to your lower back.

“Can you just rub my back please? Hurts there too,” you explained. He hummed, carefully slipping his hand just under the bottom of the hoodie that was swallowing your body. His thumb rubbed circles across your skin and just the heat coming from his hand was enough to soothe you.

Your eyes began to feel heavy again, your head nuzzling against him, his chin resting on top of your head.

You were in that headspace right between being awake and falling asleep, completely in a daze when you remembered that Harry had come straight from his work, reminding you to ask him how things went.

“How did your photoshoot go?” you asked, burying your head closer to his chest. He could hear how tired you were in your voice, especially since you hadn’t been able to get any sleep during the day due to the continuous ache in your lower abdomen.

“I’ll tell you when you’re feeling better, get some sleep.”

He didn’t allow you time to protest and with one last kiss to your forehead you were out like a light in the man’s warm arms.

»»——⍟——««

You were a frequent guest at the Holland family events due to being so close to Harry, and it was a plus that his family loved you. This time around you’d been invited to a garden party, showing up with Harry and instantly being whisked away by his mother.

You didn’t get a chance to speak to him again until around an hour or so later, stumbling over to him feeling much more bubbly than when you’d arrived due to your constant intake of alcohol.

Your arms wrapped around the man with no hesitation, your body leaning against him for extra stability.

His arm wrapped around your shoulders, placing a greeting kiss on your head that didn’t go unnoticed by the men he was talking to.

“Hi,” he mumbled, confused as to why you’d suddenly become so clingy. You flashed him a happy smile, tightening your arm around his waist as the two of you broke from his previous conversation into your own little bubble. “Hi,” you giggled.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked, chuckling towards the end of his sentence when your smile just got wider.

“I love your family, d’you know that?” You rested your head on his shoulder, your eyes scanning the garden as the party progressed. You finally noticed that Harry had been talking to Sam and Harrison, the two watching you both now with smirks at how close you were being.

“You do?” You nodded your head, a silly grin on your lips as you looked up into those warm brown eyes. His attention was torn when he heard a snicker from his twin, his head turning to look at the pair in front of you.

“What are you two looking at?” he asked, furrowing his eyebrows in slight annoyance. He barely went a week without hearing from them at least once how whipped he was for you, and they were never happy when he didn’t do anything about it.

“Nothing, nothing,” Harrison mumbled, hiding his smile behind his beer bottle. Harry rolled his eyes, swallowing the last swig of his own beer.

“Come on,” he mumbled, tugging you in the direction of the drinks. “‘m too sober to deal with them.”

By the end of the night you were more than a little tipsy, clinging to Harry’s arm with a certainty that you’d fall over if you didn’t. This wasn’t the first time he’d seen you in this state, having had many nights at the pub with a much worse result than this.

“I think we need to get you home,” he said. You pouted like a child, wrapping your arms around his waist again.

“Don’t wanna go home yet,” you whined. He placed his hands on your cheeks, gently lifting your face and looking into your slightly glazed over eyes.

“You’re drunk, bub.”

You seemed upset at his accusation, shaking your head against his chest. You couldn’t see the amused smile on his face as he watched you try and work your way around his words. You did give up after a few seconds, your intoxicated mind finding it too hard to form a well thought out lie right now, so you took the easy way.

“‘m not drunk.” He rolled his eyes, running his fingers over top of your messy hair.

“D’you wanna know how I know you’re drunk?” he asked, flashing you a smile that made your knees weak. “You get clingy when you’re drunk.”

You gasped, feigning offense as you realised he was right. Not wanting to further prove his point, you willed yourself to pull away from him, but right now all you wanted was to be in his arms.

You eventually sighed, accepting your defeat when his thumbs stroked your temples.

“Fine, but please just keep holding me.”

Harry’s heart swelled at your words, his arms snaking around your neck to hold you close to him. He had absolutely no issue with holding you close to him for the rest of the night, even if he was getting those looks from his family.

“I’ll always hold you,” he promised. “Whenever you need me.”

»»——⍟——««

You startled, jolting awake in a cold sweat as you stared into the darkness of your room. Your heart was racing against your ribcage, making it difficult to catch your breath, especially through the few stray tears that rolled down your cheeks still.

Every tiny sound you heard had you jumping in your place, the fear surrounding your nightmare still very present in the front of your mind. It took a few minutes for you to gather the courage to actually up and move enough to turn on your light, but even that wasn’t enough.

You were still shaking even as the lamp illuminated most of your room, scared of being alone where anything could get you when you closed your eyes.

It took you short of a minute to decide you needed Harry right now, but psyching yourself up to move the distance to his room took a little bit longer.

“You can do this, there’s nothing there,” you whispered, reassuring no one but yourself. You took a few deep breaths as you opened your door, staring into the intimidatingly dark hallway that housed Harry’s room.

You could see the faint light under his door, hoping he was still awake and hadn’t just fallen asleep with the light left on. You raised your hand and knocked quietly, trying not to disturb him if he was sleeping.

“Harry, are you awake?”

Now if the boy hadn’t been on his phone, still sorting some things out for his older brother, then he probably would’ve missed your ever so gentle knock on his bedroom door.

“Yeah, come in.”

You pushed open the door to his room with shaky hands, spotting the man laid in his bed, the light from his nightstand and his phone illuminating his face. He noticed the distressed look on your face, pushing himself into more of a sitting position to help you feel more welcomed.

“What happened?” he asked, rubbing his tired eyes as he watched you nervously shift your weight from your right foot to your left in his doorway. You sniffled quietly, adding on to the man’s worry about your wellbeing.

“Nightmare,” you simply mumbled. He frowned, shifting slightly under his covers to make more room for you to climb in. He lifted them up and with a ‘come on,’ you were already crawling in with him. You laid with your back to him, not wanting all the sympathy you’d surely get if he saw the dried tears on your face. Harry put his phone down and turned off the light, making the decision himself that you’d probably just want to go straight to sleep.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, letting you get comfortable in his arms and against his chest. He was always glad you were able to feel calmed by his presence, and he would never turn down helping you after a nightmare because he knows you’d do the same for him.

“No,” you whispered, nuzzling your face in his arm. “But, thank you.”

You adored being Harry’s little spoon, for the sole purpose of feeling the way your bodies perfectly molded together. He was happy to tangle your legs together, one of his arms being thrown over your waist and the other being used as a pillow for your head. It often meant he was left with an ache in his arm but seeing how comfortable it made you was enough for him to deal with it.

You didn’t fall asleep straight away, neither did Harry, the two of you just laying in one anothers embrace. You felt him pull you even closer, your heart swelling as he did so.

“Harry?” you said, catching his attention. He could hear how shaky your voice still was from your nightmare. He heard you let out a whimper, tears now threatening to roll down your cheeks.

He cooed, letting you roll over and hide yourself in his arms. He ran his fingers through your messy hair, careful not to catch and accidentally hurt you.

“You’re okay.” He didn’t let up comforting you until he was sure you’d at least stopped crying. Your thoughts were now overwhelmed by Harry, your nightmare being pushed further and further to the back of your mind.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he whispered, pressing a final kiss to your head. You smiled softly, allowing yourself to drift off in his arms and in his bed once again.

“Goodnight Harry.”

»»——⍟——««

The slamming of the front door let you know that Harry was home. For the past week he’d been working extra late with Tom, always coming home tired and almost always going straight to bed with as little of a greeting and a goodnight to you.

This was his final straw though, he and Tom had gotten into an argument today that left him mentally drained for the rest of the day. He was at his breaking point and he didn’t know how much longer he could hold it together.

He was unusually quiet as he strode into where you were sitting in the kitchen working on some things for your own work.

You watched as he headed straight to pour himself a glass of water, the glass almost slipping from his hands at how sweaty they’d become.

“Hey, you okay?” you asked, you didn’t have to be a genius to notice that Harry clearly wasn’t feeling himself. He barely even spared you a glance, the man was much too caught up in trying to calm all the racing thoughts in his mind.

“Harry?”

“‘m fine,” he choked out.

You could see the way his hands shook as he tried to take off his jacket, tears of frustration building in his eyes the more difficult it got. You watched as his chest began to rise and fall much quicker.

Harry felt like he was suffocating, his body temperature trebling in such a short span of time that he felt like he couldn’t breathe anymore.

You’d seen Harry have a few anxiety attacks in the few years you’d been roommates, so you knew the obvious signs of when things were happening in his mind, usually happening after he’d overworked himself.

You headed over to him and helped peel the jacket off of his body, helping lowering him to the floor when his knees buckled beneath him.

“Hey, hey,” you whispered, taking his shaky hands in yours, holding them close to your chest so he couldn’t hurt himself. Your eyes were focused on his face as he teared up, nervously biting his lip to try and contain the sob threatening to escape his mouth. “I’ve got you,” you promised.

He let out a whimper, squeezing his eyes shut as the tears began to fall. You placed a kiss on the back of one of Harry’s hands, keeping your distance so he didn’t feel as though you were overwhelming him too much.

“Like we practised bub, need you to tell me three things you can see.” You needed him to open his eyes, trying to coax him into doing so. It took a few moments of you rubbing your thumbs along the back of his hands for him to finally look at you, a look of uncertainty and fear in his eyes.

You hated seeing him like this purely because of that scared look you could see in his eyes. It broke your heart how scared of everything and himself he became in these situations.

“There they are, there are those pretty eyes,” you said, flashing him a warm smile. Your smile seemingly being enough to encourage him to listen to you. His eyes darted around nervously at first before trying to find somewhere to settle for a second or two.

“I-I can see my phone, y-you and um-“ he paused, taking a few deep breaths.

“Take your time, it’s okay.”

This attack seemed to be resolving itself quicker than the ones you were used to helping him through, his breathing beginning to slow rather rapidly. “And m-my jacket. Can see my jacket too.” You grinned, making sure to tell him how proud of him you were.

You were more than happy to let him crawl into your arms, his head tucking itself under your chin. You stroked his curls for a while in a comfortable silence, the pair of you still not moving from your space on the floor.

Your other hand ran up and down his back while he clinged to you. At one point he shifted slightly, brushing your cheek with his hair, creating a ticklish sensation that had you holding back laughter.

You moved your hair out of the way so it’d stop, but he only seemed to do it again and you weren’t sure if he was doing it on purpose or not.

The next time it happened you couldn’t contain the snicker, prompting Harry to glance up in your direction.

“Why are you laughing?” he asked, burying his head in your chest insecurely, thinking you were laughing at him.

“Your hairs tickling me,” you admitted with a small giggle, pushing his hair out of your face for the third time. You saw the ghost of a smile threatening to form on his lips, warming your heart a little bit.

“Come on, we’re going to go watch a movie and take your mind off of everything.” You left no room for protest from him, and he didn’t seem to mind one bit.

“C-Can we still cuddle? I like it when you hold me,” he muttered innocently, blushing shyly under your gaze.

You grinned, nodding your head. “I like it when you hold me too.”

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[absolutelyfizzing]

hole-y

George x reader angst/fluff

description - Y/N and the Order head out to deliver Harry to the burrow on the night of his seventeenth birthday. Chaos ensues and when you reach the burrow, you couldn't be more thankful for your friends and family being safe.

warnings - minor talk of gore and injuries, death, general warning for george being an absolute angel. Fem pronouns and reader gets picked up

A/N - so this is the first time ive posted in like months i think which is a little crazy, im so sorry for the delay. This is something that i just really wanted to write, i will be posting some requested writings soon as well as hopefully some more writings outside of just harry potter and marvel. 

word count - about 3600

MASTERLIST

You were terrified. The feeling in the pit of your stomach made you want to cry but you pushed it down. There were bigger matters at hand. Bigger things to worry about. One of those things being the possibility of you never seeing your best friend or your boyfriend again. The thought made you shake and when you looked over at Fred and George you knew they were thinking the same thing.

You had been friends with the twins since as long as you could remember. Well actually, you had disliked them when you first met them, they were much too loud for you to get along with and they frustrated you to no end but you somehow had all of you classes and activities with them. They accidentally let loose a prank on you in your third year and you screamed at them before going up to the astronomy tower and crying. They followed you a few minutes later and apologized and sat with you until you stopped crying. Actually they stayed with you until they could make you laugh. From then on, you had a soft spot for the twins and the same happened to them.

You didn't know when you started to have romantic feelings for George, he always said that he started to feel something for you when he was in fifth year and you sneezed so hard you made a nearby owl fly away. You thought that was rather ridiculous but it made you blush all the same. You started dating in sixth year when Fred nearly shoved you two into a closet and told you he wouldn't let you out until you talked to each other about your feelings. Since then you had been the happiest you had ever been in your life and you were forever thankful to Fred who took 100% credit for your relationship. They were your family, all the Weasley's were. Now, looking at everyone you loved in a room, you felt worry rise in your throat. No, worry wasn't the right word. Terror.

George pulled you into his side and he kissed the top of your head deeply.

"I love you. You don't have to do this." He mumbled into your hair and you sighed.

"You know just as well as I do that we both have to do this. It's okay, I'll be with Moody. He won't let anything happen to me." You muttered and then turned so your face was pressed into his chest. "But I love you too." You whispered and a tear fell from your face and into George's shirt. You then pulled away and pulled Fred into a hug. He groaned dramatically.

"No, I'm hugging you. No complaining." You grumbled and he complied, his hand going around your back and smoothing out your hair. You knew he was looking at George, some sort of twin telepathy going between them but you didn't care. When you pulled away, both of them smiled gently at you. Then before you knew it, the polyjuice potion was being passed around. You gave one last look at George and drank the potion and he did as well. It was the worst tasting thing you'd consumed in a long time and as you were keeping yourself from throwing up at the taste you felt yourself get a bit taller. You looked to your side to see two more harry's. You smiled at them and began to change your clothes.

You had agreed to go as Harry with Moody, Mundungus would also be there as himself. You had decided to switch last minute. You all walked out of the house as the minutes ticked by waiting for Harry's protection charm to end. Eventually you all were off with one last longing glance at George.

The battle was one that would haunt you for the rest of your life. As soon as you left there were death eaters on you. All you could do was hold onto your broom for dear life, Moody on the broom behind you and Mundungus on a separate broom right next to you. Before you could think, there was green all around you and screaming from every direction. You just focussed on getting to the Weasley's, a route you knew by heart, and let Moody do the protecting. At some point you looked to your right and Mundungus was gone. When you looked to your left you were horrified to see the dark lord flying next to you. Tears came to your eyes at the realization that you would probably not be making it out of there. Moody quickly began sending spells his way but it was not an even fight. He held off Voldemort for an impressive amount of time but all good things end. You heard the killing curse and saw the green light and you expected it to hit you, you were the target. Somehow Moody got in front of you to stop you from getting hit and you screamed. When Moody's body fell from the broom, yours did too. You hit the ground with a thud and your body immediately screamed in pain. You looked to the side of you and saw Moody's body. Tears were falling from your face but the shock running through you prevented you from feeling whatever damage you took from the fall. You took a breath and gathered yourself. You needed to get out of here. You would have time to scream and grieve later if you made it out of this alive. The death eaters obviously thought you to be dead and Voldemort had fallen back for some reason. You feared it was because he realized you were not the real Harry. Your tears stopped, face hardened, and you stood with slight difficulty. You would have to get to the Weasley's and you prepared yourself to apparate. When you did, your aim had been a bit off. You were in the bog outside the burrow and you could see the light in the distance. There was a panic at the house and you realized that the others had all arrived. Despite the pain in your legs, you began to sprint to the burrow. You noticed that you were yourself again, your hair getting in your eyes as you ran.

"Y/N?" You heard Remus yell and you kept running. Someone pulled you into them and you looked up to see red hair. You had arrived at the burrow and the tears had begun as well.

"Fred, Moody is dead. Voldemort killed him. Mundungus disapparated right at the beginning, I don't know where he went. It was just me and Moody and then he just-"

"Shhh, hey you're safe now, it's gonna be okay." He muttered and you noticed the break in his voice. You suddenly realized that you didn't feel George near you. You pulled back quickly. "Living room" Fred stated and you headed in, Fred following behind you. When you saw George though, you were not filled with relief. In fact you were so filled with dread that you thought you might just throw up.

"Is he..." you whispered. You couldn't finish your question, dreading the answer.

"m' not dead" Came a whisper from the man you loved and tears began streaming down your face as you collapsed next to him and buried your face in his chest. Your breathing was rapid and your heart was racing. It only slowed when you felt a familiar hand brushing through your hair.

"Fred, I'm saintlike." you heard George whisper and you looked at him questioningly but he was looking across the room to his brother. Fred looked concerned and dropped down next to you, a hand going to your back.

"What's wrong with him? Is his mind affected?" Fred asked his mother worriedly. You were also looking to Molly for reassurance but she looked just as concerned as you.

"Saintlike. You see...I'm holy." George spoke again and all attention was on him. "Holey, Fred. D'you get it?" The relief that you felt was overwhelming and you laughed deeply before burying your face once again into the chest of the man you loved.

"Pathetic. Pathetic! With the whole world of ear related humor before you, you go for 'holey'?" Fred laughed with you, his voice cracking with emotion and the tears streaming down your face were now happy ones. You were so thankful that the man you loved was okay and unchanged besides the trauma he would likely carry. And of course that he only had one ear.

The rest of the night would go by in a blur. You were debriefed by Remus who tried to be as gentle as possible in his questioning. You did not leave George's side and neither did most of the Weasley's. However hours later you still hadn't moved or eaten, too scared to leave George. Enough time had passed that everyone told you George was out of the woods and most people had gone to bed. You couldn't leave though. Molly walked toward you, a plate full of food with her. George was asleep and you were staring at him fearfully, making sure that his chest was moving with life.

"You need to eat, dear." Molly whispered and you sniffed a bit.

"I cant." Was all you could say and she sat next to you.

"Well either you need to eat or I will wake George up so he can make you." At this you looked at her. She had unshed tears in her eyes and you suddenly tackled her in a hug.

"I'm so sorry, Molly." You whispered into her neck where she was holding you.

"What on earth are you sorry for?" She asked.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect him and that I wasn't here to help when he got here. I'm sorry I didn't convince him not to go. I'm sorry-"

"Hey, stop." She asserted and you did, pulling back to look at her. "Now you know why you went. George went for the same reason. You were both very brave and it could have been either of you who got hurt out there. Now you are both alive and okay and so are the rest of my children. I will be thankful for the rest of my life for that. But I still seem to have a kid who isn't taken care of and I need to make sure that she is. So will you please take a breath-" she paused to wait for you to take a deep breath, which you did, "and eat something. Or else I fear my son may have a heart attack when he wakes up. Okay?" she questioned and you sniffled and wiped your nose.

Making one last glance at the movement of George's chest before looking to Molly and nodding. She handed you the tray of food that instantly comforted you and she sat with you while you ate. You were both silent but you were thankful she was there to watch over George while you were distracted. When you were finished she took your plate and stood.

"Now I am going to get some rest. You should consider doing the same." She whispered and patted your hair. You watched her walk to her room and you looked back to the man in front of you.

You weren't sure how long you were sitting there but by the time you came out of your trance to a hand touching your face the fire was nearly out. You looked up at George and he looked sad.

"Are you okay, baby? Do you need anything?" You started to stand up, worried he was uncomfortable. He pulled you down on top of him on the couch and you squirmed, worried you would hurt him.

"Honey, I need you t' stop moving and let me hold you please." He sounded serious so you stopped trying to get off of him. Instead you sighed and moved to straddle his hips and then lay the rest of your body on top of him, your head going to his chest. "Thank you." he whispered. You lifted your head to look at him and he had tears in his eyes.

"Are you in pain, bubs?" you tried to be quiet so you wouldn't disturb the peace in the room.

"No. I'm just glad you're okay." He whispered and a tear fell. You reached up to brush it off and you smiled at him.

"Of course I am, you're the one who got hit by a spell." You reassured but he shook his head.

"You're right that I'm the one that got hit by a spell but Voldemort tried to kill you. You could have died tonight, Y/N." He seemed so sad but you didn't know how to comfort him. You hadn't really thought about it since you got to the burrow, too focused on George. You had yet to really process the fact that Moody had died to save you and without his sacrifice you would not be here with your boyfriend.

"I didn't though. I'm okay." You moved up a bit to kiss the cheek on the side furthest from his injury. "We are both okay." You put your head in his neck and sighed deeply. He took a deep breath into your hair and wrapped his arms around your back.

"We are never doing that again." He grumbled and you chuckled.

"Really? I was planning on taking some polyjuice tomorrow, maybe having another go at it." You smiled and he rolled his eyes.

"I thought I was supposed to be the comedian."

"Not when your last joke was 'holey'. Your comedian title has been revoked."

"Oh shut it, I'd just taken a curse to the head, give a guy a break." He smiled but you both stopped and the smiles dropped while remembering the reality of the situation. "How long have you been up watching me?" he asked gently and you sighed, preparing for your scolding.

"Probably 6 hours or so."

"SIX HOURS? You haven't slept since you got back? Darling you need to go to bed, why on earth did you stay up that long?" he practically screeched and you shushed him as best you could so he wouldn't wake the whole house. You didn't answer his question, instead looking at his chest. "Y/N why wont you sleep?" He asked again, this time more seriously. You felt tears come to your eyes.

"I couldn't-I had to-" you were cut off by your own tears.

"Hey, bubs, whats wrong? I'm sorry, didn't mean t' upset you, bunny." You shook your head at the thought that he had made you cry.

"I was just worried that-" You paused to take a breath, "I thought if I went to bed I might wake up and you wouldn't be..." You felt him shush into your hair. He hadn't really thought about it that way and he felt bad for keeping you up like that.

"Bunny, I am fine. I pinky promise." He pulled away to do just that. As your pinkies were interlocked he made decisive eye contact with you. "I promise nothing bad is gonna happen to me if you sleep, okay?" You nodded a bit and he leaned in to kiss you. "How about we both go to sleep and you can stay right on top of me so you can be with me if anything happens." He mumbles against your lips and you nodded again. He pulled you snuggly into him and put a hand on the back of your head to hold you there.

"I love you." You whispered into his chest, not even necessarily trying to get him to hear.

"I love you too, bunny. Now you need to shush and get some sleep." You huffed and finally settled into him. He couldn't sleep for much of the time you did, he could never admit it but he was quite scared as well. He shared your fears. He was worried he would wake up and you would no longer be with him. He got bits of sleep now and then but he couldn't sleep through the night. You stayed asleep on top of him until he saw the sun come up. He knew you were vaguely awake as your breathing wasn't as slow and you curled into him tighter.

"M' gonna get up to make us some tea, yeah?" You nodded slightly and he took that as an okay to get up. He picked you up gently and brought you to sit on the counter in the kitchen. His head didn't seem to hurt at all which surprised him a bit but he knew his mother was a gifted healer and she worked her magic on him to make sure he would feel okay the next day. He tried to step away from you to make some tea but you did not release him. Instead he was trapped standing in front of the counter, you clinging to him tightly. It was at that moment that the other twin decided to come into the kitchen.

"How's the hole?" He nudged George with his elbow and he chuckled.

"Not bad at all, don't even really have a headache." He muttered, still trying to be moderately quiet as you seemed to be in a half asleep state and he knew you needed all of the rest you could get.

"She doing okay?" Fred whispered, nodding toward you.

"Restless night." George replied and Fred nodded in understanding, moving to prep the tea for George seeing as he was trapped at the moment. When the tea was done, George rustled you awake slightly. "Would you like some tea, m'love?" You nodded and moved to sit up a bit, releasing George and catching Fred making gagging noises next to you.

"Oh shove off." You grumbled and he chuckled. You made a move to get off the counter and George grabbed your waist to assist you. As soon as you were on the ground you made your way over to Fred to hug him properly. You were just so relieved that your favorite people made it out of yesterday alive and Fred sighed and hugged back.

"Y/N, this is 3 hugs in 24 hours. I'm starting to worry about your head. There isn't a hole in it is there?" Fred questioned and you rolled your eyes. You lifted your head and turned it to look at the other twin across the kitchen who stood with tea in his hand, gazing at both of you with a calm and content look on his face. You smiled at him before releasing his brother who gave your hair a ruffle as you turned to look up at him.

"Thanks for being okay." You smiled at him and his gaze softened a bit.

"Right back at you."

The rest of the morning was spent drinking tea and talking, thankful just to be alive. As the family woke up there was more relieved exchanges without the shock and stress that had been present the night before. You rarely left George's side besides to let him get changed and have a private talk with his brother. Eventually Ginny dragged you away to get you cleaned up and changed into clothes that weren't covered in blood and grime. As you walked away the boys began to gather around George. Ron looked at the twins expectantly with a glint in his eye.

"Well? Show us then!" He got out a bit excitedly. Harry smiled as well and Bill seemed to have some jitters. George smirked before a ring appeared in his fingers. It was modest but it was all he could afford and he knew it wouldn't make a difference to you anyway. The boys all shoved each other in excitement and Fred clasped a hand on George's shoulder.

"I know you know this already but I just want to remind you that if you hurt her, all of us wouldn't hesitate to beat you to bits." He smiled but there was not so much humor behind his statement. The rest of the boys mumbled in agreement. George gave them all a look.

"Okay, first of all, I nearly died yesterday. I think you could all stand to be a bit nicer to me."

"We all did, get over yourself buddy." Bill joked and George rolled his eyes.

"Second of all, How come I'm the one getting threatened? I'm your brother."He looked around the group.

"'Cause she's the favorite, obviously." Ron stated simply before leaving the group, Harry and Bill following him, both giving George a teasing smile before they left.

"I think that was rather rude." George grumbled, though there was no malice behind it. He looked over at his twin who simply shrugged and patted him on the back.

"Just the way it is. If you two were to break up, I'm pretty sure she's the one who stays in the family." Fred winked before heading out of the room as well and George took a second to look at the ring in his hand. He heard footsteps and quickly shoved it into his pocket. You appeared in the doorway, hair matted down with water and in comfy clothes, fuzzy socks adorning your feet.

From the doorway you smiled at George who beamed back at you. You felt around in your pocket for a moment where your hands were shoved and when your hand hit the hidden ring there you let out a breath. You stared at each other for a moment, just content to be near each other without thinking about the war for a moment, warm light filling the room and calm in the air, both planning on later asking the other to spend the rest of your lives together.

[honeyhenry]

Captain Confusion

A/N: Inspired by this video that makes me weep with its cuteness! I just had to write this okay 🥺🥺🥺 This is in the same universe as Homeward Bound, which happens after this story. Feel free to give it a read after this, if you haven’t already! ALSO should note that the lovely @ohmygoodie​ is my Sy partner in crime and without them this fic would not be made possible :)

Warning: mention of operations/hospitals, and a whole lot of fluff!

It was a simple procedure and so it hadn't worried you too much, other than the usual fears when a loved one is under the knife while in the hands of trained doctors. Sy’s hernia had been authorised for operation only five minutes into the doctor’s appointment you had all but dragged him to, and scheduled for 4 days later. Not really much time to prepare mentally, but you knew it was necessary with your big bear of a man in pain. Despite the painkillers prescribed, he was walking with a limp and groaning in bed for all the wrong reasons.

In the waiting room, you and his Ma kept busy during the 45 minute wait by looking through magazines, talking about how the Captain’s quality of life will improve, and what kind of minor jobs you’ll have him do around the house while he’s recovering as you continue to work.

“I hope the recovery isn’t as long as some people have said. I know for a fact he’ll not want to be cooped up all day. If he’s anything, he’s stubborn” you sigh, knowingly.

Ma smiles, looking at you pointedly, knowing that she is in the presence of the only other soul who knows what is best for her son. “He knows better now that his health is his wealth. He’s got a lot more riding on being well now. After all, it’s not just him he’s gotta be there for anymore.”

“Yeah, I mean I always tell him, he’s not 25 anymore. Or even 30. I’ll need you to back me up, he does anything you say. I’m his equal, you’re his Mom.”

You both laugh a little, hers warm and kind, while yours tinges with the remaining hopeful nerves of an army Captain’s wife. You don’t like not knowing about your Sy, especially since you spent all those years apart, not knowing if he was safe, or even alive. The waiting, in any capacity, is the hardest part.

You’re flipping through a random tabloid magazine, when the surgeon in charge walks through to the waiting room.

“Everything went really well with Captain Syverson. He’s coming to from the anaesthetic and asking for his Ma?”

Ma grins before sucking her teeth between her lips watching as your mouth drops. You both move from the waiting area to follow the surgeon towards where your husband is resting. You speak under your breath, only wanting Sy’s Ma to hear you; “I hope he still remembers how to grovel after this.”

Ma enters the room with you following her, arriving only a couple more corridors along from where you’d last seen him earlier that morning. He may not have asked for you but you were going to see Sy whether he wanted it or not. A grand push of the door allows it to swing open, and suddenly there he is. A little disoriented but has a large dopey smile plastered on his face as soon as he sees his Ma. His heavy head lolls to one side as he rests it on the plush hospital pillow.

“Hey Ma” he groans out as she bends over her large son to give his forehead a kiss, taking his hand in hers. He spends a moment just gazing at her for a while, the love he has for her evident on his face, as she tells him that everything went well, and that he can go home tomorrow.

It’s only after this tender mother and son moment, that he notices you.

“Ma.... why ya bringing a beautiful girl here when I’m like this...oh god I’m not wearing underwear Ma!”

His feeble attempt at trying to cover himself means that you actually end up seeing far more of him than you expected. Nothing you hadn’t seen before, but it definitely hasn't happened in front of his own mother before. The whole situation makes you blush and giggle a little as you try your best to avoid eye contact with Ma. You can only imagine the look on her face, and you don’t want to get any more involved with Sy’s naked form than you need to right now.

Rather than put you and your poor Sy through any further embarrassment, Ma speaks up.

“Oh darlin’, this is y/n. You remember her, right?”

And while he’s listening - or at least pretending to listen to his Ma fussing over him again - he’s just staring at you, gazing in awe as if you were the one to hang the stars in the sky.

“You are.... so pretty” he slurs, making you break out a genuine smile that he mirrors, glad that he was the one to make you look even more pretty.

“Well thanks handsome. How do you feel?” you perch on the edge of the bed and hold his hand. To him, the gesture feels warm and inviting - even if he doesn't know you, he recognises something about you in the comfort that you bring.

“Feel like shit. Oh fuck i said ‘shit’ in front of the lady” he whines again, scrunching his eyes closed as hangs his head in shame. It looks like he might even cry with the realisation that he’s made such a foolish impression of himself. It takes Ma shushing him and making him take a sip of juice from his bedside to calm down, dabbing his face with a cloth when his juice spills from his mouth.

“Oh Logan Daniel Syverson...what did they do to ya?” she lightly scolds as she helps clean up the mess he’s unknowingly created around him. That’s your Sy, a hurricane of mess that somehow fits into order just how he likes it.

You giggle a little more at his shameful expression, before he refocuses, giving you his undivided attention once more.

“How is it that ya know my Ma and we’ve never met? Or have we? ‘Cause I think i’d remember a face like yours” 

“Well...” you start, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear to let him see your entire face, hoping it would jog his memory. As you do so, the ring on your fourth finger glints in the hospital light, and for the first time since you've entered the room, he’s noticed.

“Oh...man...knew a girl like you would be snatched up already. Whoever has the honour of being yours is a very lucky man.” He smiles softly, a wistful look in his eye, while makes you realise that you can’t wait for the drugs to leave his system, you have to remind him who you are and who he is, right this very moment.

“Sy honey... we’re married. You’re my husband, and I’m your wife. I think the drugs are making you more than a bit loopy.”

It’s his turn for his jaw to drop, his eyes are unblinking as he takes in what you’ve just said. He turns sharply - more than his doctor would have probably liked - to his Ma, and then back to you, and then his Ma again, waiting for one of you to burst out laughing at the prank you surely must be playing on him.

“Wha-? A wife? I have a wife?” you nod and he exhales a deep breath of air in amazement. 

“YOU’RE my wife? Really?” you nod again and Ma smiles at you as she watches the scene of Logan meeting you all over again.

“Am I still in the army? I’m a Captain ya know”

“You left just a few months ago. You still work in the local camps, of course. You like it there, and you’re home every night and most weekends.”

“Does Ma like you?” You don’t even get a chance to finish as he turns to his mother “Do you like her? is she nice? Does she like your new kitchen? I built it y’know.” 

You knew when you met, dated, and married him, that Sy was a Momma’s boy. He loves his mother so much, that her opinion will always mean the world to him. 

Ma nods “You two are the sweetest couple. She’s the best addition to the family, gives you a run for your money alright. She’s my new favourite.” You get a soft hug from her as she says this, with her wrapping her arm around your shoulders and pulling you close. She’s always felt so grateful that her Logan found you, because my goodness did he love you ferociously, and he needed you in his life. You were the making of him, and the whole Syverson clan will forever be grateful to you for it.

"And where did we get married? If we really are married.” He continues his line of questioning.

“At the ranch, on your family’s land. it was such a special day. We had the reception there too. And we went to Italy for our honeymoon.”

Sy is basking in every word you say, praying it to be true, as if he could will it into existence if it hadn’t already happened, wanting badly to remember sunset kisses and italian food and beach days all spent with you. He perks up at the last thing you say, taken by complete surprise.

“Honeymoon?! Oh my god have we...ya know..?” A blush fades over Sy’s face, and even though you love his Ma, you really wish she wasn’t finding out so many details about your personal life today, like how your son rails you on the regular in many ways, and in many places. He must somehow remember or at least accurately imagine your past endeavours, as he grins like a little shit. 

You smack his arm, lightly but with a firm hand.

“Be quiet, or the whole ward will know about our sex life” you threaten. “Yes we’ve had sex. i’d hope so given that we have a kid on the way.”

If Ma had had to deal with her son getting horny over his “new”wife, she was being fully compensated for it as she witnessed him fall head over heels in love with you, all over again.

“A kid?...Tell me ya not messing with me...are we really- I-” he swallows and his tears come even easier than before “We’re havin’ a baby?” With the sudden realisation, he turns to his Ma. “This beautiful woman right here’s havin’ my kid, Ma?” He looks between the two of you again, watching as you both nod and beam from ear to ear.

“You know you cried just as much when i told you for the first time too. i promise when the drugs are out your system it’ll all make sense again.”

Sy smiles, clutching your hand in his warm palm, almost scared to let go as the door is knocked and he feels you might be taken away. Instead, it’s a welcome visitor.

“Hey doc,” Sy greets the man who reenters the room, now freshly out of scrubs  to visit his patient - who if anything is now simply love sick, no hernia to be found. “This is my wife, and she’s having a baby.” he looks back to you with a quirk of his eyebrow “My baby?” You roll your eyes and he confirms it; “my baby.”

“Oh, congratulations...again.”

The doctor’s evaluation and explanations don’t take long, and while Sy is being informed, you start rubbing your belly as a form of self-comfort. You will need to remind your child that while their father looks incredibly stern and impossibly large, he is silly and goofy and already loves them with his entire being. Over the course of the afternoon, Sy talks with you while the anaesthetic wears off. It turns out they had given him a pretty high dosage based on his height and muscle mass, so he would be out of action for a couple of hours at least.

“Oh, i have your ring” you pipe up before he starts getting too sleepy again, taking the thick gold band off of the necklace around your neck, placing it on his finger carefully.

“That feels better already” he sighs, as he begins to doze in and out of consciousness. Before he closes his eyes once more to rest peacefully, a small tear slides down his cheek, which you of course, notice. Sy has cried maybe 5 times in the time you’ve known him and three of those times have been in this very room.

“Honey what’s wrong? Are you in pain? i can call the doctor-” 

“No i’m fine i’m fine i just-” he sniffs and tries to clear his throat from the sad, heavy pain he feels in his chest. “I’m gonna be real sad when I wake up from this dream. What if I can’t find you when I wake up?”

Oh your sweet, silly man.

“Bear it’s not a dream, I’ll be right here when you get up properly and we can go home and cuddle and I’ll heat up your favourite meal. I’ll be right there with you.”

“And the baby?” he asks, eyes wide. almost nervous to ask.

“Well they have to come too, they're with me. We can look at their pictures again so you can get reacquainted. And Aika will be so happy you’re back. We’ve been gone the whole day.”

“Aika!” your husband perks up, “Oh Aika, man....I love that dog..”

“I know you do bear, you just get some rest for now and then we can go home.”

Before you know it, he’s fallen back to sleep, his mouth wide open as he slumps against his pillow, completely out of it.

It’s dark outside when Sy opens his eyes again, watching as his Ma passes you a small herbal tea in the dimly lit hospital room. Technically visiting hours are over, but no one was going to argue with the Captain’s family. You smile, and he feels like he can finally relax, in your presence

“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes” he growls lowly, and you look up at him from your phone, beaming in surprise, glad that your husband had woken up feeling a bit more like himself.

“Oh hello again” you smile and squeeze his hand, his slow blinking already indicating a much clearer mind, and that he knows exactly who you are.

“Again? What’d I miss?”

“The drugs” he stops you mid-sentence for a sweet kiss, acting as though a minute more without your lips would be the source of his downfall. “Mmmh, the drugs made you so loopy, it was the sweetest thing, Sy.” You grin as he pulls you up beside him on the bed.

He raises his eyebrows, clearly with no recollection of any of the past events. Yet still, he smiles.

“Yeah? How’s baby?” he holds you close to his side, wrapping an arm around your waist so he can cover your tummy with his palm.

“They’re great. Glad to have daddy back and sane.”

You swear that as you say that, he starts tearing up again, this time however he doesn’t let them fall. He was openly weeping earlier, but you won’t tell him that. Not yet.

“Damnit. Must be something in these drugs they got me on.”

“Mm-hmm sure bear.”

You stay close that evening, both curled up on a hospital bed that is already quite a tight fit for your husband alone. But as always, he makes it work. You’re half on top of him, both of you fast asleep, when the nurses come to do their rounds. Ma had left just after he had woken up, sneaking off into the night to let the rest of the family know how her most middle son is keeping after the operation. You’d cuddled and doted on each other until you’d fallen asleep, Sy following not long after as he bid goodnight to you and your precious cargo with a soft kiss to your lips, and protective rub of your stomach.

He counts himself more than lucky to have something so good, that it would pain him to forget. He was living the life that he’d been too scared to ever dream of, and he couldn’t be more grateful.

taglist: @ohmygoodie​ @michelehansel​ @la-cey​ @palaiasaurus64​ @sassy-pelican​ @brandycranby​

Masterlist

feedback / ask me a question here!!

[chil2de]

Hii! It's me again, the "teasing mom's broyfriend" anon. I just- you about killed me with that sequel. Hot doesn't even begin to describe it, really 🥵🥵

I have more :))

------------------------

Megumi knows. He knows what a slut you are, knows you've been fucking his father behind his and your mom's back. He knows you only got with him to provoque his father. He knows all of that. And yet, he can't let go of you. He won't do his father this favour.

He avoids going to your mom's house with you as best he can, bc he just can't stand the two of you doing this to her, the poor woman doesn't deserve it. He never touches you when you come back from your mom's, bc he just knows you've been with him. There is, however, an exception. The only thing that can make him help you tease his dad is when they fight.

When it happens, Megumi goes visit your mom with you, and whenever she can't see it, he makes it a point to touch you a little more than would be appropriate in front of Toji. The mix of Megumi's hands all over you and Toji's warning glare could probably make you cum right then and there. Once, when your mom was out doing grocery shopping and Toji stayed behind with the two of you, Megs was all to eager to fuck you, make you scream his name, all for Toji's benefit.

Oh, you do so love it when they fight. You know you should hope for peace and harmony between father and son, but you have much more fun when they are at each other's throat.

You wonder what you would have to do to have both of them filling you up at the same time...

ugh okay sorry if this post is just a massive wall of text i had to cut down on spacing because i kept reaching tumblr’s limit on characters, and uh... incase you couldn’t tell, shit’s about to get serious if i wrote this much LOL this probably looks so clunkyyy :(( i apologise but i have like a line left or two? so i’ll compress everything by saying a massive thank you because this would not have been possible without your sexy ass intellect. i was seriouly fucking dying writing this, it might be the first or second piece i’m genuinely proud of and i thank you :) i hope you enjoy it as much as i did writing it

this piece makes sense as a standalone, but works a lot better if you read the previous piece! read my disclaimer here if you’re new <3

w.c: 2.8k / characters: 15k (incl spaces) and a special thank you to my beloved anonie. couldn’t have done it without you ❤️

day and night: two.

your bedroom door shuts with a quiet ring. you can only slump down against it, knees held into your chest. your thighs are still quivering like a poor little lamb.

as you move to type out a text for megumi to not come over, there’s a faint knock at the window. your heart burns, throat clogged and knees weak.

you don’t know if you can get up. hell, you don’t know if you should get up. there’s another few delicate rips against the glass and you manage to stumble over in fear of attracting toji’s attention.

“megumi?!” you mouth his name in alarm, dismay crawling onto your features.

your boyfriend gives you a dead once over, noting your matted hair, smeared mascara and weak posture.

of course he knows.

you can discern it clearly from the way he refuses to meet your gaze.

“can you just let me in?” he whispers, tone flat as his index motions over to the lock of the window.

you don’t know what to do.

after all, you’ve still got toji’s cum flowing inside you from earlier.

you fumble backwards, moving to allow his lanky figure to slip inside. megumi manages to hoist his leg up and over, squeezing inside with ease. he closes the window shut behind him, pulling the curtains.

“m-megumi? what are you doing he-“

he doesn’t have time to waste.

megumi knocks the wind out of your lungs as his cold hands seize the sides of your head, stealing your lips for a kiss. he tugs at your bottom lip, tongue drinking you in for a couple of moments like you’re the last meal he’ll ever eat.

“shit.” he hisses, pulling his face back and screwing his eyebrows in mutiny.

oh, but if you didn’t love the way he looked at you like you were pure filth.

“you taste like him. it’s disgusting.” he spits, wiping his delicate lips with the back of his hand.

he knew, but there was always a part of him that wished you wouldn’t submit yourself to the likes of toji. he just had to see it for himself.

“come on, megumi-chan~ thats no way to talk to your girlfriend, is it?

your mother doesn’t deserve this. megumi doesn’t deserve the heartache, either.

megumi can’t see anything but the spitting image of his father all over your body, licking and fondling all the same crevices that he has. but he can’t get enough of you. he can’t stop, can’t turn away from you. he knows that at the end of the day you're spoon-feeding him phrases he wants to hear.

but you’re so good to him.

your pussy fits him like a glove. your hand intertwines with his perfectly. your head is the perfect size to cuddle onto his chest.

there’s something about you that makes you more addicting than nicotine.

bony and slender fingertips ghost over your thighs. you can’t help the squeak that hiccups from you. megumi raises an eyebrow in scepticism before flipping the hem of your miniskirt up.

he scoffs, slicking his long middle finger against your hot cunt.

“don’t hold it in.” he reprimands you, flashing a grimace as you squabble with him.

“b-but toji-“

“but what? am i not good enough for you?”

you swallow thickly, chanting a small prayer before allowing toji’s cum to drip out of your pussy. you shiver, goosebumps licking your skin when you can feel the warmth of his seed ooze and coat your soft thighs. you can’t avoid the burn of megumi’s regard as he watches the cum slowly flow out of you.

he’ll make you want him.

megumi can’t fully comprehend why you keep running back to his father instead of him, why you choose toji over him. like father like son, it evokes a bubble of magma in the form of competition and jealousy.

he’ll make you beg for him. that’s for sure.

“get on the bed.” he whispers, tone cold and even. there’s no warmth to his voice, even with his usual monotonous tendencies you can tell you struck a nerve. it makes your stomach churn, butterflies swooping in and adorning your vital organs.

like a moth drawn to a flame, as though you have no mind of your own, you step backwards until the back of your knees kiss the metal frame of your bed. megumi towers over you, pushing you backwards as he crawls in between your thighs.

the crisp ring of his zipper sliding down clashes against the room. why should he undress himself properly for the likes of someone like you?

“there’s no point in prepping you. i think you know that.” megumi sighs, relieving his twitching cock from the confines of his painfully tight boxers.

you can feel the avarice swirl in your abdomen, cold fear stilling in your veins at the mere thought that you could get caught by toji at any second. it makes your fingertips tingle and stomach churn. when you wail a needy whimper, megumi only shakes his head before plastering his icy cool hand against your wet lips.

a part of megumi wants to let all hell break loose. if he allows you to moan as you please, it won’t be just toji hearing your cries of ecstasy. knowing your mother, perhaps she’d be a little glad to know that your boyfriend is meeting your needs sufficiently. whereas toji?

it puts him in a predicament. from a bystanders point of view, toji has no right to storm in here and to shriek at megumi for blowing your brains out.

why?

because he’s not your dad.

he’s not a paternal figure in your life. there’s no right for him to say what you can and cannot do. he won’t hold that kind of reign over you like your mother does. and megumi likes that. he relishes the idea of toji being forced to listen to you babble megumi’s name, to mewl and cry for him to hit it deeper whilst he can’t do anything but complain.

it’s not like you haven’t heard your mother with other men plenty of times. it’s only natural, right? hell, she’ll probably gossip with you about it.

a carnal desire glosses over megumi’s steel blue gaze. like a wolf waiting to pounce onto a hare. he can see the way your thighs squeeze, how you gulp before him with those doe eyes of yours. you’re practically purring underneath him. for once, megumi gathers the reasoning to understand why his father finds you so intriguing. there’s nothing better than having your own toy melt and oblige under every command.

your boyfriend’s hand finds its way to your chest, where he rests the palm flat underneath your breasts. he steadies himself, using you as leverage as he guides his dick through the cum stained mess of your cunt. your heart pounds in anticipation, drool coating the back of your tongue as your pussy throbs around him. he manages to fit his tip in, dragging the enlarged and sensitive muscle against your walls. your ankles flutter around megumi’s waist, lower body strength trembling as you attempt to pull him in further.

“m-megs- please..”

“what?” he screws his eyebrows, staring you down. you can’t find the words in you to plead for him.

“what the hell? why act all coy now?“

“that’s not how we do things around here, is it? so spit it out. i won’t get what you’re trying to say otherwise.”

megumi slips his dick out, grinding against your clit as his torso flushes against yours. he pulls you in for a quick kiss, enough to relinquish his appetite, but not enough to taste the filth that corrupts your sweet and innocent lips.

“those cute little whines of yours won’t help you, either.” his breath flickers against your skin, sticky tongue licking trails as he works to mark up your neck. you can feel the tears prick your eyes already. you’re suddenly hyper aware of your heartbeat pounding in your ears, how it throbs against your cunt and the droplets of perspiration trickling along your skin. you can feel megumi’s pulse heavy against your clit, the way his dick twitches as he smears the tip through the folds of your slick. it’s slowly driving him insane. but that’s okay. even through the static that bounces around in his skull- he knows that you hate it more.

after all, your boyfriend knows best.

your fingernails soar around to megumi’s back. you want to scratch him, but you can’t access his toned skin through the layers of his jacket. instead, you’re left fumbling and scrunching the fabric like a feline with an insatiable desire to itch its claws.

“megumi- please, it’s too much-“ you huff through laboured breaths, peering up at him through tear stained eyelashes.

it’s almost enough to make him melt. almost.

“what is?”

“this?”

he shifts himself back up, grabbing his dick and slipping only the tip in once more. he allows you a few centimetres extra before dipping back out and repeating the process again. megumi’s gaze locks with yours, as though he’s asking ‘is this what you want?’

“s-stop teasing me.. just put it in alreadyy~” you choke out a groan of frustration, ready to slam your hips down onto the full length of his shaft.

“why should i?”

“megumi, i swear to god- if you don’t fuck me right now-“

“-or what? you’ll go to my dad? good luck, when you couldn’t even fulfill your duties as being his toy.”

so fucking humiliating.

the way megumi instantly stands up and proceeds to stuff his still hard and leaking dick back into his boxers.

he’ll deal with it later.

you’re left stuttering, unable to form any coherent words, thoughts or insults to spew back at him. legs wide open, cunt empty and glistening in the blue tint of the moonlight.

he leans over, swiping some of your excess drool with his thumb before dipping it into your mouth. he half expects you to lick at his thumb, convince him to stay a little longer, but his skin sits in your mouth like a forgotten thermometer for a couple of seconds.

“if only you could see your face right now.” he hums, tone flat with a certain mockery.

sometimes, as the days pass, you can notice his resemblance growing closer and closer to toji.

-

the following day

you haven’t left the quarters of your room for the entire day. you’re stuck in bed, face mushed into the confines of your pillow. you’ve always held high regards of the fact that your libido isn’t necessarily extremely high, but when you’re promised dick just to be neglected of it? shit feels like you’re in heat. you can’t go to toji, because you’re mother’s home. not only that, but he’d be sure to teach you one of his lessons. you’re already shivering thinking of the conversation with him, how you’d even try to dig out of that hole you were already so deep in.

you can’t call megumi either… at least not for now. you sigh wistfully into the pillow, kicking your legs about on your bed as you hiss a groan of turmoil.

there’s a sudden knock at the door that snaps you out of your haze. it leaves you pumped, blood coursing through your veins and you shoot up like an attentive little puppy about to be taken for a walk.

“it’s open!” you clear your throat, humming.

the disappointment rocks your features so clearly that it’s embarrassing. it’s just your mother.

“you okay? thought you died in here, baby. lunch is ready, and your lovely megumi-kun came to say hello.”

what?

“megumi? that’s nice. did he leave a message or anything? like he just dropped by to say hello or-“

“hm? oh, no. he’s having lunch with us.”

“is everything okay, dear?”

“yeah! yeah, i’m good. sorry, i spaced out a little bit. small headache, that’s all. i’ll change clothes and i’ll come out to eat.” you dismiss your mother, keeping in the hyperventilation you’re about to undergo. she gives you a small glance of concern before returning to the dining room to serve her guests.

“(y/n)! we were just talking about you!” your mother hums, gifting you a smile of warmth and radiance as she pours drinks into some cups.

you can feel toji’s mocking stare dig holes into your skin.

you can fucking feel it.

you can imagine him saying it.

“slut.”

at the six chaired table, you scurry to sit the furthest away from megumi and toji. your mother shoots you a sideways glance, motioning for the seat between toji and megumi. you swallow thickly, awkwardly striding over to take a seat.

your knee accidentally knocks into toji’s and you instantly utter an apology.

“you should be.” he mutters underneath his breath, disguising the words as a sigh.

“so? you said you were talking about me?” you straighten yourself, perking up a semblance of cheerfulness and perfect innocence.

“oh, right! toji was just telling me how stuffed you were yesterday!”

your lids flicker in shock and you abruptly stare at toji, whose half lidded jade green eyes slowly land on yours before locking to meet your attention for a few seconds.

“sorry, what?” you stutter, finding it difficult to believe the situation.

“you know, the food? are you sure you’re alright, honey? you’ve been acting strange since this morning.”

“i’m fine, i swear. just some painkillers would be nice.”

when your mother turns around to rummage for some painkillers, she emits a squeak of alarm at the lack of them.

please. you’ll do anything to get out of this predicament.

“are we out? i can go grab some-“

“-no, that’s okay. i’ll head out. i need to grab a few extra things for dinner anyway. you three, make nice with each other!”

sure.

when the door shuts, you realise you’re out of options.

you can’t run away.

“so, megumi. how’s eating up after my leftovers feel?”

“leftovers? because one woman wasn’t enough for you?” megumi scoffs, averting his gaze.

“it’s not my problem that your woman came running to me. doesn’t that say something about you?”

“like what?”

“like, you can’t fuck her properly?”

“i can’t fuck her properly? but you’re telling her to keep your cum inside her? don’t you care what’ll happen if she gets pregnant?”

“see, megumi. she’s on birth control. you didn’t know that? and besides, if i didn’t know any better-“

toji finally allows you his undivided attention, staring right through to your soul.

“-i’d think your little girlfriend here likes walking around with my cum inside her.”

you’d be able to run a butter knife through the tension hanging in the air. the room holds its breath, and as do you in compliment of trying not to set things off into a piping hot mess.

“isn’t that right-“

“-princess?”

your fight or flight response kicks in at the malicious tone that coats toji’s tongue. you swallow thickly, throat parched and lips cracked.

but fuck.

if it isn’t the most arousing thing- the two of them squabbling over you.

toji screws his face at you, features lighting in a mix of awe and delight.

“really? you’re seriously enjoying this?” toji hums with mockery, eyebrows perking at your unusual behaviour. he can smell the sweet nectar of your arousal slicking against your underwear.

you abruptly stand up, ready to leave.

megumi’s hand curls around your wrist. he slings your hand behind your back, slamming you over the table. some silverware and plates clatter and dash against the hardwood floor.

“answer the question, (y/n).” he hisses.

you whimper a soft whine. there’s no way you’re answering that.

“get your fucking hands off of her.” toji barks, kicking his chair back.

“try me.”

something washes over you. a premonition, say. that if you don’t speak up, someone will end up seriously injured.

“i can’t choose between you two. i just can’t. so i think it’s the best option if we just stop this completely.” you sigh, prying megumi off of you. his stance relaxes and you wince at the pain in your spine. you rub your wrists in slight agony, refusing to meet either of their gazes.

“it’s been fun, but i think it’s time to draw the line-“

“no.” toji remarks offhandedly.

“huh?” you contort your face in offence. there’s something thick on megumi’s face, too. it almost looks like determination?

“i said no.” toji reiterates, taking a stride towards you.

his index and thumb caress your chin, tilting your jaw up to look at him.

“i don’t care how long it takes. whether it’s me or him-“

“-i’m making you choose.”

[etherealeeknow]

vocal lesson

• rated m for mature, slight angst

• pairing: vocal coach!seungmin x fem!reader

• wc: 2.3k (confession: writing long fics isn’t my forte)

• tw: underlying toxic relationship, masturbation (m), grinding, groping, unprotected vaginal sex, explicit language, creampie- i think that’s all, please do tell me if you find more c:

• note: i have a love hate relationship with this fic. i have a few goals i’d like to achieve from this fic and whether or not i’ll succeed is based on your feedbacks 🥺 so please don’t hesitate to drop them! also, enjoy!

• tag list: @es-kay-zee @formidxble @bobateastay @vogueinnie @sailorhyunjinz // leave a comment, dm, or an ask to be tagged! thank you ♡

—

seungmin despises the way his heart dropped when he sees your name flashing on his phone screen instead of you flashing upon his eyes. by this time, he’s fully aware that a chatty girl like you isn’t the type to text. in fact, you only do it on one occasion, which is when you’d like to cancel the class. just like what he has expected, the text says you won’t be able to make it that day and that you’re sorry; but he knows you’re not sorry. he knows you’re doing this on purpose—to torture him—and it’s working perfectly.

honestly, the suffocating pain in his chest isn’t because he has been losing sleep, tossing and turning in his king size bed for hours over the thought of you being all dolled up in the baby blue dress he has gifted you; neither is it because he missed his favorite orchestra playback this morning just so he could find the most perfect white shirt out of his collection of other white shirts just so he can appear pleasant for you, but because you’ve been cancelling the lesson for three times in a row. if your mother ever finds out about this, she would definitely fire him. to prevent that from happening, seungmin has been silencing your maids with credits, but he knows too well they’d soon go for more if you keep this up. 

fiddling with the handkerchief that you had purposely left for him a few weeks back, seungmin gloomily shoves it into his pocket before dragging himself to the grand piano to warm his throat up. the first few notes started off slow and stable according to the piano keys, but with constant fear running on his mind, his fingers slipped and pressed the wrong one. the awry sound makes him cringe and shuts his eyes in annoyance. he hates it, mistakes, he hates it to the fullest, yet he has managed to keep up with it all this time just because he adores you more than anything, even when your cracked voice sometimes haunts him at night. see, seungmin’s giving his all to you,

but why are you doing this to me? where are you? i miss you.

“heh, pathetic,” he mutters to himself as he slowly lies down onto the piano bench, facing the chandelier which lights would usually illuminate you when sitting on the same bench while waiting for him to get to the music room, running your delicate fingers along the black and white wood. your side profile’s exactly like a goddess—breathtaking.

sighing over the imagery of you, he begins unbuckling his belt; eyes closing momentarily when he slips a hand into his unbuttoned pants and starts palming his clothed member. three weeks. it’s been three weeks since he last got off, since he last felt your touch, and he’s been trying his best to hold back because he believes you’ll eventually come around. he believes you won’t leave him just like that, yet you aren’t here again today, and he’s dying to release his pent-out frustration.

a heavy sigh escapes his lips when he takes out his dick, the tip leaking from precum and it makes him let out another sigh when he begins pumping it; another one follows, then another one, and it carries on as seungmin’s hand goes faster by each second. even in the peak of his pleasure, all he can think of is you. oh, how heavenly it would’ve been to have both your soft hand and pretty lips around him instead. his free hand is quick to slip into his pocket, snatching your handkerchief. despite only briefly smothering himself with it, your lingering scent alone is enough to make his head spin. with the sateen now wrapping around his throbbing cock, it feels as if you’re there, skin to skin with him.

“fuck!” he hisses, but eyes widening right away over his own volume as he quickly raises his head to check on the slightly opened door.

he’s so close and pausing in the middle just to lock the damned door would ruin everything. should he just bet on his luck today? it’s not like any of his well trained maids would rudely barge into his music room, right? but who knows?

screw it.

his back automatically arches when he feels the increasing tension in his pelvis, and it pushes him to fasten his hand move—pumping his dick rapidly to release. with eyes rolling to the back of his head, seungmin begins chanting your name desperately and that’s your last straw. the moment seungmin ejaculates is the moment you slam the door open and run towards him. the poor guy who’s barely riding out his high jumps on the bench as he sits up.

“y/n—”

“shut up,” you cut him off and crash both of your lips and body together, causing him to fall back down onto the bench, and creating a somewhat deafening screech on the floor, but it’s nothing compared to his loud moan in between the kiss.

the feeling of you straddling his lap instantly makes him hard again; the feeling of his warm hands running wild all over you and the stickiness on your inner thigh coming from your ruined handkerchief has you wetting your already damped panties—the effect of rubbing yourself when peeping on his little show. as the kiss deepens, so does your hunger for each other. of course, there’s no way you’ve gotten over what he did, and he’s surely still upset for being ghosted too, but for now, lust is winning. one squeeze on your thigh is all it needs for you to throw your baby blue dress across the room.

“you’re always so hot when you do that,” says the now naked seungmin who gets back onto the same position, looking at you with his half lidded eyes as his arms stretch out to fondle your breasts, his favorite part.

“the only time you’d compliment me is when we have sex,” you scoff before going back down on him, slowly yet easily pushing his cock inside of you, and both of you grunt in unison.

“y/n, ah— shit! i told you it’s because i know you can do better.”

snorting, you call him a liar before grinding mindlessly, movement starting off slow just like how your breathy moans starting off low. as much as seungmin enjoys being taken care of, patience doesn’t exist in his dictionary today. his hands leave your chest for your hips, guiding you to slip in and out of him at a faster pace. but that’s still not enough—he needs more. in a blink of an eye, you go from being on top of him to under him. seungmin bangs you down loudly on the grand piano, your buttcheeks and hands hitting the keys and filling the entire room with jumbled notes while you yourself are filled by him to the fullest, right at your g-spot.

“seung— fuck!” 

“louder,” he commands while thrusting into you, hips moving in a rhythm, and strong hands bringing your legs up to rest on his shoulders before holding onto your ass, supporting you from slipping down—multitasking is indeed his second best talent besides singing.

“what’s the p— point?” you breathe out, trying your best to sound coherent while maintaining eye contact, “so you’ll compliment karina instead again? pat her on the head and caress her cheek again?”

“you know i only did that to motivate you.”

“bullshit.”

if seungmin has to name anything you can do best, it’ll definitely be your ability to drive him crazy—disobeying him. again, he believes he has been going all in, keeping up with your lack of talent and bullshit for the past half a year; the way you’d fight, then fuck him, and fight again only to fuck him again, and the cycle continues. whenever he tries to talk things out, be it about your vocal lesson or your tangled relationship, you wouldn’t give a damn. today, that has to change.

“and i’m the one to blame? karina always listens to me,” he replies, slowing his thrust as he can feel your walls clenching around him even more and more.

“faste—“

“i said louder, y/n. tear your mouth wide open,” he grunts, thrusting into you so strongly that you jump and land back on the piano, creating such messy harmonies.

“seungmin, faster!” you yelp, voice raspy yet a little louder this time with your hands finding their way on his shoulders, and it makes him sneer as he leans in to kiss you, biting your lower lip before he lets go, and stop dead on track.

“hoarse voice, dry lips. don’t i always tell you to stay hydrated?”

you find it unfair. seungmin’s energy doesn’t make sense. the fact that he still has the power to put up with fucking while carrying you even after his solo session is unfair. and the way he has the audacity to give you a vocal lesson in the middle of everything, then stopping just because you aren’t complying is way too cruel, but perhaps, this is what you deserve.

“i’ll never cancel our lessons again. i’ll— i’m sorry. i will really listen to you,” you beg desperately, almost sobbing as you grind on him, refusing to let the tingling sensation on your core die down.

seungmin shakes his head. he knows you too well. normally, seeing you surrender like this softens him and makes him think that perhaps, he’s being way too demanding, or maybe, he should be even more understanding.

“that’s not what i asked for, love.” is what he says before resuming, putting all the remaining pressure he has left to snap his dick deeper into you.

that’s when his name falls out of your lips ever so gracefully, followed by endless ah’s, jaw hanging open. this is the loudest and clearest you’ve ever been—no holding back, no hitching breaths, no cracking—pure perfection. 

seungmin doesn’t even need to ask for more because you’re already repeating it on your own.

“fuck yes. just like that. such a good girl,” he grunts right beside your ear, picking up his pace.

it only takes a few moments till you feel the familiar knot in your abdomen coming back along with him twitching inside of you, and this time, you make sure to hold onto him so tight, afraid he’d pull the same stunt again.

“shit— please let me cum. please cum with me, come inside me, please, please, please,” you blabber, voice turns husky once more, but seungmin couldn’t care less, there’s always another chance for another vocal lesson. right now, all he wants is to,

“cum.”

the two of you reach together. name chanting, legs shaking, fingers digging, and body fluids mixing into each other—drenching not only your lower bodies, but also the extravagant bösendorfer piano seungmin shipped all the way from austria. but that’s another thing to worry about. right now, he can barely keep his eyes open while you can barely feel your stiff spread legs across his shoulders. once he’s made sure you’re over your high, seungmin gently pulls out and lets you down. he sits himself first on the bench before pulling you by the waist to seat you on his lap, and the two of you let silence take over for a little while.

“i know you’ve been bribing my maids,” you start off, “they have a big pay, but it’s impossible for their designer bags to double up in just a week, you know,” you continue while pushing his damp hair aside, revealing the remaining half of his sweaty forehead.

“they were gonna snitch on you to your mom,” he replies, pausing in the middle to mirror your action, pushing strands of hair to the back of your ear before averting his gaze back on your eyes.

even with your smudged eye makeup and cracked lipstick, you’re still as shining, dilating his pupil.

“and?”

“and she’s gonna fire me.”

“isn’t that what i should worry about? you’re a world winning award soprano. there are hundreds of talented people waiting in line to be your students. money isn’t the problem. plus, i know you hate my voice. i also never listen to you, never call you sir, and am ninety nine percent horny throughout our lessons. in short, i’m a bratty and disrespectful pain in the ass.”

your punchline makes him snort and he can’t help but to pull you into a hug, closing the already small space in between so he can indulge in your body heat and feel your chest beating calmly alongside his.

but what happened to changing things? don’t you wanna be in charge? you can’t just let her have everything she wants. 

despite hearing the faint voices in his head, mocking him for having the weakest heart for you, seungmin doesn’t care. for all he knows, he was a train wreck earlier this day; he surely didn’t expect he would go from reminiscing the memory of you under the chandelier to it actually coming true. 

“this is real, you’re here.”

“it is. i am.”

“and you’re gonna—“ pausing, he breaks the hug to cup your cheeks, “you have to stay.”

“what for? for you? for the vocal lessons? for… what?” you question, unconsciously tilting your head as you place a hand over his, slightly squeezing it, hoping he wouldn’t let go.

silence.

“i might be a bitch, but i’m not dumb. it isn’t about money and it isn’t about sex either. so what is it, seungmin?” you ask, eyes searching for an answer before adding, “i bring no good to you.”

you’re right. his best friends have said the same thing. they can’t seem to wrap their heads around how a collected person like him can break so easily over a random, spoiled, daddy’s little princess. it doesn’t make sense, he knows—i know. he’s been trying to figure it out, only to meet the same dead end.

“i’m a mistake.”

yes—yes you are, and seungmin hates it, mistakes, he hates it to the fullest, yet he has managed to keep up with it all this time just because,

“you’re the only mistake in my life that i can take, y/n.”

—

gen’s masterlist

[natache]

Ita Rina

First and Forgotten Yugoslav Film Star who provocated Gestapo

Ita Rina was born on 7 July 1907 in the small town of Divača (then Austro-Hungarian Empire, later Yugoslavia, now Slovenia) as Italina Lida Kravanja. She was called Ida Kravanja for short. She was named after a journalist Finzi Haydée, Jewish family friend from Trieste. The first daughter of Jožef a railroad worker and Marija Kravanja, Rina had a younger sister Danica. Shortly after the outbreak of the World War I, the family moved to Ljubljana, where Rina matriculated in 1923. She was not a good student; she repeated the third grade of elementary school. However, her dream was to be an actress.

In October 1926, Slovenski narod (Slovenian People) magazine organized a beauty pageant, and Rina entered the competition. She was crowned Miss Slovenia and was to travel to the final event for Miss Yugoslavia, which was supposed to be held on 20 December 1926 in Zagreb. However, her mother did not want to let her go to Zagreb. After a group visit from the Slovenian delegation, Marija Kravanja relented. Unfortunately, when Rina arrived in Zagreb, the jury was already choosing the most beautiful of three finalists. She was, however, noticed by Adolf Müller, the owner of Balkan Palace cinema in Zagreb. He immediately sent her photographs to German film producer Peter Ostermayer. As her mother did not want to let her go to Berlin, Rina ran away from home.

Her escape was enabled by a family friend, a painter Alojz Malota and his wife Hedvig Šarc. They invited her to come with them on a trip to Austria, and instead she went to Berlin. She has said that she felt very lonely and scared during the train ride and thought about returning home.

“That was my longest and hardest journey. I huddled myself in a corner of a coupe and looked around myself in fear. I only knew few words in German...”

Rina arrived in Berlin in 1927. Shortly after she had her first audition, following which she had classes in acting, diction, dancing.

"They would shine a spotlight on me" she later said "cameras would buzz. There were cables everywhere. Some complete strangers would stare at me, whispering amongst themselves. They told me to scream, to laugh, wave and cry. I think I looked most natural in scenes where I was crying. All I had to do was remember how far away from home I've gone and how I've deceived my mother."

"You don't know how to walk!" a director was yelling. I've dedicated all my strength on walking as gracefully as possible, and I thought to myself "how's it possible that I, who have climbed Triglav thrice, all of sudden am incapable of walking." I must admit, first few steps on film were harder than any danger definitely mountaineering.

After several small film roles in 1927 and 1928, the critics finally noticed her in the 1928 film The Last Supper. The same year, Rina met at a Yugoslav embassy party, her future husband Miodrag Đorđević, a shy engineering student from Belgrade, son of a general director of the Royal Post Office.

He asked her out to dinner in a little more upscale restaurant. What he would find out later is that his students account was not enough to pay for the meal. He went to the phone in an attempted to call a friend who could lend him money. Ita figured out what was going on, and since she was already rich, secretly passed him a few bank notes, to spare him the embarrassment. She always liked him, and they understood each other well.

 

Around that time newspapers in Yugoslavia started to sensationalize her love life, as a counter she published an open letter.

Cenjeni g. urednik!

Vsikdar sem bila ljubeznjiva napram g. dopisniku Vašega lista. Želela sem na ta način izražati simpatije, ki sem jih gojila do “Vremena”. Toda nežentlementski dopis Vašega dopisnika od 15. t. m. je zlorabil to mojo ljubeznivost in me prisilil, da Vas naprošam zaradi istine za uvrstitev naslednjih vrstic: Prišla sem domov na oddih, da se pripravim za bodoče delo, ne pa da se zaljubljam kakor goska. Zaradi tega ne potrebujem nikakih senzacij, zlasti pa ne senzacij, ki gredo preko meja dopustnega. Čudim se prostosti, ki si jo jemlje g. Ambrož, da izmišlja kar imena mojih idealov. Prava senzacija bi bila šele, ko bi g. Ambrož nekoliko srečneje uganil moje ideale. Kar pa piše g. Ambrož, je bilo doslej meni in vsem mojim znancem docela neznano. Odpotovala bom tedaj, ko me pokliče novo delo. Senzacijonalni odhod avtomobilov itd. je prosta glupost. 

Da končam. Žal mi je, da se je edini g. O. Ambrož smatral za najpametnejšega od vseh tukajšnjih novinarjev in da je segel po tako nehvaležnem poslu. Naši javnosti je treba servirati resnico o mojem delu in moji osebi, ne pa glupih izmišljotin. Prejmite g. urednik izraze itd.

Ita Rina.

Her breakthrough into European stardom came after taking a role in a controversial film Erotikon by a Czechoslovakian director Gustav Mahaty. As soon as she read the script about a seduced and then abandoned daughter of a guard of a railroad station, she understood it as her big chance, and she was right.

Erotikon premiered in Prague. Czechoslovakian censors cut out the scene of her giving birth to a child, but the movie garnered great success with film critics and audiences across Europe. At the premiere in Paris in Moulin Rouge and the film goers carried her out of the theatre on their hands.

The films success angered the puritans. Especially the french catholic theologian, abbot Betteleme who wrote: "... First, they lie next to each other, and then one to another ... It is true that the cover hides their figures, but it certainly does not hide their movements... The protagonists are shown in particularly long shots, especially Ita... A viewer can recognize her excitement, then her expression of anxiety mixed with longing, then the pain and at the end... I blush while describing the scenes". He went though streets of Paris tearing down the posters that were plastered all over. That only raised the popularity of the film.

In 1930, Rina acted in three films, most notable being the first talking Czechoslovakian film Tonka of the Gallows, which is often named her best role. Meanwhile, she married Miodrag Đorđević in 1931. Although she had announced her retirement from her film career, but she actually continued her acting until the outbreak of World War II. Her last prewar film was crime drama Zentrale Rio.

The situation in Germany was getting tense, especially for anybody who was considered undesirable which included actors who were foreign. She left Germany on the insistence of the then ambassador of Yugoslavia Ivo Andrić. In 1939, very close to the start of WW2 every time she went to work or went home, there was a man who sat in the car. In the beginning he was very quiet and she thought he was an assistant of the producer and that he might represent some new custume, a way of saying thanks to the actors. And then he spoke. At first there were talks of the superiority of the German race, but later his changes because more apparent. "I argued with him in that car" she told to the operator in the studio and retold him the whole conversation. "How could you have dared, that man is from Gestapo." said the operator. The story was retold to Ivo Andrić, and he ordered her and her husband to urgently leave Germany. The taping of the film was mostly done. That night they packed all of their belongs. In the morning she taped a few leftover scenes and absconded for Belgrade that same day.

"Only on the road I understood what's going on. Tanks everywhere, soldiers."

They went to live in Belgrade. She didn't act as the war was starting to rage and had her first child Milan in 1940 and thee years later a daughter Tijana. Her in-laws disagreed with the marriage to a controversial actress at first. And they had a permanent table for themselves and their friends at the local tavern.

After the bombing of Belgrade they moved to Vrnjačka Banja. Life during wartime was hard and she laboured and sold all of her possessions to keep family fed. She even rescued her husband from jail where he landed after he, in a tavern proclaimed that Hitler will have the same fate Napoleon did in Russia.

They moved back to Belgrade after the end of World War II in 1945. Although she was promised several roles in Yugoslav films, all projects were cancelled and she was treated unfavorably. After receipt of a letter she had written to President Tito, Rina began working as a co–production advisor in Avala Film. But she soon left Avala Film and moved to Lovćen Film.

She returned to the silver screen once, in the 1960 film War, about nuclear war fallout, directed by Veljko Bulajić. This was her last role. She got her role not though a studio, but through her husband asking nicely.

“Before the shooting of the film War began, I was approached by a very likable gentleman, that was the husband of Mrs. Ita Rine Miodrag, and in a very discreet, shy way, asked if we can talk and during that conversation, suggested to cast Ita. Honestly speaking, I have already completely forgotten about her. There was war, and they she didn't work for a very long time. She wasn't listed anywhere in cinematography as an active actress. I remembered her from her films. I suggested we meet. So we met, I don't know where in Zagreb or Belgrade, I cannot remember, but she impressed me. She made a strong impression, of a smart woman, an actress who didn't want to be in a film for no other reason, but to be filmed. She wanted to know about her role. I really liked that, so we made a deal.” 

As she suffered from asthma, Rina and her husband moved to Budva (then Yugoslavia, now Montenegro) in 1967. There, she took care of her husband, who was ill with sclerosis. Rina died on 10 May 1979 from an asthmatic attack during the great earthquake that leveled the capital of Montenegro. She was buried a few days later in Belgrade, in the presence of numerous film artists, admirers, friends and family. Her husband died next year.

Best source is in Slovene here:

[ilove-cedricdiggory]

I love you, mum

Remus Lupin x Reader

Requested - Noppe

Summary - Remus Lupin was the love of your life, right? You thought so, that was, until he came home from an order mission finding you pregnant and hating it with his entire being. Can you handle that?

Trigger Warning - cursing, mentions of abortion, mentions of pregnancy, rude as hell Remus.

This one is kinda lengthy, so, fairwarning. I'ma make it a series, so, Part 1!

There he stood, right before you, his bag packed as your eyes watered. "I know 'm love, but you know how the order is. I don't get to pick when I go." He took you into his arms, his hand immediately running through your hair.

You both were 24 now, honestly surprised with the way time had flown by even with the pending war surrounding you. He, James, and Sirius were going to investigate a lead, one that involved the fourth member of their family from Hogwarts, Peter.

The night Peter was trusted with James, Lily, and Harry's lives, Voldemort had shown up, prepared to murder them in cold blood. The only thing stopping him that night was that you, Remus, and Sirius paid a surprise visit to your favorite new family, wanting Harry to experience a Halloween as normal as you all could make it.

Harry had been zooming through on his broom in his Kinmare Kestrels costume, the five of you cheering him on as if he was in the middle of a quidditch game himself. Voldemort had made himself known quite quickly, assuming the three of them were on their own, but was met with a small army, prepared to protect your family.

Now, Remus was leaving to go find Peter, along with looking into how deep his dedicated now lied with the monster attempting to rule your world.

"I'm going to be back before you know it. I'll be nice and safe, and I'll be home after this months turn, so we won't even have to worry about that when I come home." You nodded, but teared up at that.

"But, who'll patch you up and kiss all your bruises?" You asked softly, pushing back some of his hair to gaze into his eyes. "'M sure James and Sirius will be more than happy to help me out like they used to, although I don't think either will kiss the bruises - not that I'd want them to." He grimaced at the thought of one of his two best friends kissing each healing wound on his skin after a horrible night of turning.

"Just, come back safe, okay? Don't do anything stupid, don't let Sirius talk you into doing something irrational, don't let James cry too much about Lily and Harry either, please. I can't even imagine how they're doing. Just come back safe to me." You kissed him softly, pulling him closer to your body, only wrapped in a robe, holding him as close to you as you could.

"Of course sweets. You be safe too, go see Lily and Harry, go see Molly and the kids, don't stay cooped up in here missing me. I'm sure Molly would love to bake with you and I'm sure Lily would be more than happy to eat at much as she can, especially now that we all know she's pregnant again." He laughed softly, kissing your forehead.

"Okay, okay, go, before I lock you in the house and break your wand so you can't leave." He chuckled, wiping a few stray tears from your face as he kissed you one last time before moving to leave the comfort of the home the two of you built together.

Five minutes without him had you sobbing and feeling empty.

Six days without him had you throwing up.

Two weeks without him had you taking a pregnancy test.

Two weeks and three minutes without him had you sobbing as the plus sign on the test.

Three weeks without him had you hiding it from your best friend.

Four weeks without him had you looking for the baggiest of his sweaters and wishing he would finally come home.

Five weeks without him had you shaking in fear, fear of your growing stomach and fear of the second turn he would be fulfilling away from home.

Six weeks without him had you going to the appointment without him, without anyone knowing.

Six weeks and two days without him had you sobbing.

Six weeks, two days, and thirty four minutes had you screaming in joy as you wrapped your arms and legs around his warm hold, clutching onto him with dear life.

"Remus John Lupin!" You yelled, tears falling harder as you felt the worries of him being dead in a hole left your shoulders.

"Oh my sweet love, I've got you, yeah? I've finally got you." He whispered. Your arms were tight on his frame, holding him like you were afraid this was a dream, for him to fade away and leave you once more.

He had walked you to your bed, sitting on it with you set in his arms, his nose sniffing your hair, letting your scent calm him and moony. "Oh my girl, I've missed you so much." He whispered, your tears finally slowing. "I've missed you, bubs." You whispered, your eyes meeting his to press your lips upon his, holding his face close to yours.

Silence filled the room, his hands wandering your skin, making sure each inch of it was the same as he remembered. He didn't falter, until his hands slipped under his sweater, feeling the bump under his hands.

"The fuck?" He whispered, pulling away from you. "What's going on?" He asked you, his eyes sharp on your own.

"Um." You said, your head falling and you stared at your hands. "'M pregnant, Moons." You whispered, moving off of his lap to lift up the warm fabric, showing him your bump. "Twins." You said softly, looking up into his eyes.

"You're joking." He said, his voice void of emotion, it staying the same pitch with each syllable.

"Does it look like I'm joking? You're staring at the bump. I haven't told anyone, waiting for you to get home." You were waiting for a smile to break out on his face, for his eyes to light up, for him to wrap you in his arms once more and spin you and gently as he could before bending down and kissing your belly once - twice - three times.

But, it didn't happen.

Two minutes after he knew had you silent.

Three minutes after he knew had you shuffling back from foot to foot.

Four minutes after he knew had your eyes welling up with tears.

Five minutes after he knew had you breaking the silence, your voice louder than expected.

"Say something, Rem!" You yelled, flinching at the sound of your own tone.

"I - uh." He said, one of his hands moving down his face to attempt to shake the shock from it. "No." He said after another moment, standing up and moving across the room.

"No, we aren't having a kid, let alone two! No!" He paced back and forth, shaking his head. "No way. We're gonna have to figure something else out." He spoke, stopping to think, his face pointing up at the sky. "I'm sure there's something we can do to fix this." He said, finally turning to look at you.

"Fix this? There is nothing to fix, you prick!" You yelled, tears falling once more, but for a much different reason. "I'm fucking pregnant, this isn't something you fix!"

His eyes grew angry, glaring at you like never before. "You know how I feel about having kids! No!" He shouted, his tone matching yours.

"Fuck you." You whispered, shaking your head. You picked your wand up from your bedside table, flicking it once before a suitcase appeared and clothes began filling into it.

"What are you doing?" He asked, his voice monotoned once more.

"Leaving." You spoke the word, shivering at the idea of it. But, once the bag was packed, your hand wrapped around it's handle, you quickly turned on your heel, unsure of apparating out of the flat while pregnant.

"Where are you going?" His voice was slightly softer now, the actions of the moment catching up to him.

Before exiting the place you called home, more so, leaving the person you called home, you whispered. "I dunno."

Your wand was held out, summoning the Knight Bus, letting you onto it and paying the fee before looking at the man before you.

"Where to?" He asked, his left eyebrow raised at you.

You didn't think you could go to Lily and James, not wanting to face Lily's wrath towards Remus along with her hurt for not knowing about your pregnancy. You couldn't turn to Sirius, knowing he would hate his best friend in a way you could never want for the man you loved.

"The burrow, please."

The bus took you there after dropping off the two people before you, assisting you with your bag to the front door before disappearing.

Your hand shook as you knocked, but heard the pitter patter of the feet of her many children before a yell from the woman herself. "I don't know who's at the door! Charlie can you please change Ginny!"

The door flung open, revealing the woman to you. "Oh! Y/n!" She spoke, her face breaking out into a warm, wonderful smile before letting you in. "I haven't seen you for a little while, I was about to send an owl your way." She said, leading you into the home and back into the kitchen where the smell of Mince Pies filled your nose.

"'M sorry, Molly. A lots happened."

With tears in your eyes, you stood before Molly, the woman you saw as your own mother. The woman who celebrated with you when Remus asked you out. The woman who held you when you cried after your first argument with the man. The woman you had planned to tell about your pregnancy, but feeling your heart break each day you waited to tell her.

You had it all planned out. You were going to show up with Remus, once he found out and the two of you celebrated, wearing a sweater that covered your bump - much like the one you still wore. You would be holding two bags, one for each of the parents you loved so much, with a shirt for them both with the words "first time grandparent" on it.

But now, you had to tell this woman that you had kept your pregnancy from her for this long, your spouse had practically told you to get rid of the babies, and that you had left him.

"Molly, I'm pregnant." You whispered, pulling his sweater up to show the adamant bump. "And Remus wants me to get rid of them, so I left him." Your voice was breaking, shaking, and terrified of what you were to do now.

Her eyes filled with tears of her own, her arms wrapping around your frame and holding you to her. Molly Weasley: Best Hugs. She held you for a minute, letting your sobs fall from your body, holding your shaking frame. Once you calmed down as much as she thought you would, she sat you down on the kitchen chairs.

"Oh, sweet girl. I'm so sorry." Her wand flicked, bringing you a warm cup of tea before she settled in the seat beside you. "You're more than welcome to stay here. We can move Charlie in with Bill and you can take his room. You know you're more than welcome to." Her voice was soft and sincere, looking at you with the look you wished your fiance had looked at you with. Her hand reached to tuck a stray piece of hair behind your ear before moving it down to press softly against your growing stomach.

"Molly, you know I can't do that. I wouldn't want to put Charlie out of his room. Plus, I'm going to be getting bigger and eating more soon, I don't want to be in the way." You explained, watching as she shook her head. "In no way would you be in the way. Plus, I'd love to be here with you through this!" She exclaimed, taking your hand in hers.

"Honestly, Molly, I don't want him to find me." You admitted softly, your heart hurting at the truth. You hated how he had talked to you, how easily it was for him to suggest he "took care of it". It hurt you to your core. He was the man you thought would stand beside you through everything. Through the fears of financial trouble, through the happiness of your own home, through your pregnancy. But now, you were all alone. Your soul felt cold, the warmth he provided now long gone, leaving a feeling as cold as the harshest winter in it's place.

"Oh, honey, I understand." She said softly, nodding.

After another minute or two with the wonderful woman, you looked at her. "Molly, could I use some parchment and a quill? And your owl? I wanna write to Lily." You said softly, hating to intrude, but knowing that with one person told, that would soon turn into two, then 9, then everyone else you could imagine.

"Of course love! Of course! Bill, bring me some parchment and a quill please, y/n needs it!"

Bill soon came in, hanging you the items you requested before rushing back outside to play with his siblings. "You can go sit in the living room and write, okay?" She pushed back your hair, smiling at you before allowing you to walk off, going to write a letter for James and Lily, along with one for Sirius.

Your hand was shaking as you pondered what to write to your best friends. How do you explain that you're pregnant with their best friend's kids, that he doesn't want them, and that you've left him, all in the same day that they got home?

You set your fears aside and wrote to your best friends, letting everything out that you could.

Dear Lily and James

I'm so glad you're safe, James, I was so incredibly worried. I'm so happy you're back home with Lily and Harry.

You guys might be wondering why I'm not using our owl, that's actually what I was writing you about. I left Remus. Before you're freaking out and such, I'm also pregnant. He wanted me to "take care of it". His words, not mine.

It's twins. I don't know the genders yet, but I'm 6 weeks along. Absolutely huge though. That's a lie, I just feel huge. I can still wear one of his sweaters to cover the bump. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you, Lils. I wanted to wait until Rem got home and us be able to tell you both together. Don't worry, I'm writing Sirius about it too.

I don't know where I'm gonna stay, if I'm being honest with you. I'm at Molly's right now, but I'm not staying long. I'm not staying at yours either - especially not with you pregnant too Lily, and with Harry. I can't do that to you guys. Plus, like I told Molly, I don't want Remus to know where I am.

I know that might seem wrong, but he wants me to get rid of them. I can't ever do that. They are apart of me, apart of us both. I'm growing these two precious beings that are half of us and full of our love - well, my love. How am I supposed to look him in the eyes and see him hate me as I grow our kids.

I'll write you both after I'm settled somewhere, but this will be my only letter until then. I love you both so, so much. Give Harry a kiss from me.

You folded the letter up and wrote one quite similar to Sirius before tying them to Errol and sending him off to your three best friends.

You stood and waddled back to find Molly with Fred and George outside, scolding them for attempting to get Ron to fly on their broom and hit the Bludger before it hit him.

"This is what I have to look forward to, huh?" You asked, a light smile on your face.

"Oh yeah, they're twice the trouble." She laughed, smiling. Fred and George smiled at that, proud to have caused Mischief in their family. "But they give you twice the love." She spoke, watching as they ran off while their mother was distracted.

The two off you walked towards the house once more, talking. "Did you decide what you want to do?" She asked finally, looking at you.

"I'm going to the states. I have some family there that I want to go visit, one with a guest house that I can stay in. I owled to them when I sent Lily and James one." You stood before her, tears welling up.

"You better come see me all the time still, send me pictures of you growing. Send me the address so we can come see you, especially in America! Don't let me go without seeing you growing my grandbabies." You nodded, wrapping her up in your hold.

"I won't, I swear. I'll send you so many owls, you're gonna think I am living with you." She kissed your temple, holding your cheeks.

"Okay, I put your bag upstairs in Bill's room, just as a precaution. Do you want me to go get it or-" she was cut off with a frantic knock, the hits not stopping.

"I'll go get it, that sounds urgent." You both laughed softly, your swollen feet carrying you up the stairs and to Bill's room, grabbing your suitcase before heading down the stairs.

"Molly, where is she. I just want to see her." You heard Lily speak, her voice hurried.

"Sirius, let me go! She's in there, I know she is!" Remus yelled, his voice carrying up the stairs.

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit." You mumbled, looking around the stairs for some kind of hidden passage. It's a wizard and witch house, how is there not a hidden passage?" You reached for your wand, your eyes squeezing shut as you realized you set it down to write to your friends.

"Stop it! All four of you!" Molly yelled, her voice sharp. "There is a woman in my home who is pregnant and does not need this kind of stress. Now, I will ask her if and who she would like to see."

While she was speaking, you creeped down the rest of the stairs and slipped into the living room, grasping your wand.

"Worse than my own kids, I swear." You heard her mumble before walking towards the living room. "Y/n, dear? I'm sure you've heard them by now but the boys and Lily -" she cut herself off, her eyes finding you holding your wand and suitcase, your eyes welled up with tears and your lip between your teeth.

"I love you, Mum." You whispered, before clutching your belly in protection with your arm holding your suitcase, apparating from the warm home.