#i think it's the 'main vocal curse'

[heeliopheelia]

GET HIM BACK! (s. jake)

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

includes: making out, skin marking, fingering, unprotected sex, riding, brief hair pulling, choking, slight bulge kink, degrading, praising too, slight exhibitionism, facial, cursing

word count: 3.3k

synopsis: 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘢 𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘳𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘨𝘶𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘦𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘰

note: i really hated the build up to the one i posted before so i rewrote it as promised... sorry for the confusion guys ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

guts event masterlist ⋆♱✮♱⋆ main masterlist

“Your parents home?” Jake breaths out the words right into your mouth as he runs his tongue over your bottom lip.

It’s been mere three minutes since you first heard his loud and obnoxious bike speeding down your quiet street. He’s careless and tact-less as always, and for some reason that’s what draws you in even more. 

He never keeps you waiting long. He doesn’t beat around the bush. He’s always one foot out the door of wherever he is, always waiting for a single call or text from you. He knows what he wants and is always vocal about it, a go getter type of a man. 

So it was expected to have him climb up the low roof of your porch and hear his gloved hand knocking on your window not even ten minutes after you texted him a not so innocent wanna come over?. 

As if that was even a question. Of course he wants to come over, wants to see you any chance he can get. He doesn’t need to think for a second to grab his helmet and ride to wherever you are, so needy for him. He’s known you for less than two months – met you at a party and kept hooking up weeks after, and yet here he is, wrapped around your finger, with nothing else in his mind but you.

You’re not much better yourself, dreaming of his beaming face every night that you somehow don’t end up spending with him. You’ve grown attached to him, so attached that the tearing inside your chest becomes more hurtful whenever you’re not with him, day by day he takes a firmer grasp of your feeble heart.

Your hands are grasping onto his worn out t-shirt, kissing him greedily and breathlessly as he giggles into your mouth, pulling you closer and closer into his chest. 

“They came back an hour ago,” you answer, raising on your toes to make the angle more comfortable for the both of you. 

Slowly, he pulls away and presses a gentle kiss to the corner of your mouth, then to the other one. “That’s kinda inconvenient, no?” He asks, nosing at your cheek and you close your eyes and nod your head, melting as the leather of his glove brushes against your skin as he lifts your chin up with his fingers.  

His warm lips are on yours again, hand pulling your face upward to leave you breathless in a matter of seconds. “Wanna go out with me?” He whispers in your lips. He hums when you shake your head. “No? Jay’s party’s still going. We could go, hm?” He kisses you again even when you shake your head no. “Wanna just stay here?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out quietly, eyes never meeting his. 

“Okay, as you wish, baby,” Jake smiles into your lips. “I don’t mind. Anywhere with you is good.”

Before you get the chance to swoon over his words even more, he’s pushing you backwards and against your dresser, putting his helmet down on it before caging you in between his flexing arms. He kisses you dizzy then, angling his face to the side to press and suck on your lips better.

It’s so Jake-like to make you forget about all of your surroundings, to kiss you into oblivion until your lips are swollen and burning. You never complain – why would you when you know you can only have him for this summer, before college starts again and you’ll be out of your hometown for another year. You always take him in, again and again, because you’re scared you’ll wake up from this dream too soon and never see him again. And you can’t let that happen. 

This time he pushes his tongue inside your mouth, the warm muscle working against yours. Your hands finally relax from where they’ve been clutching onto his black top so desperately, only to travel up into his hair. You tug on it gently, feeling the slightly sweaty strands underneath your fingertips. 

Jake pulls you flush to him, pushes his hips into yours for any type of fraction and groans lowly in his throat when he gets what he’s been craving for for the past hour. 

“Couldn’t wait till tomorrow to see me, baby?” He teases, but you’re nodding your head quickly before he even has the chance to finish the sentence. He smiles into your lips as your desperate fingers pull his shirt up and off of him, leaving you pressed to his toned chest. 

The two of you messily make your way to your bed, bare of any duvets and blankets as it’s too hot to sleep under any. You fall on top of him and part your lips only to latch onto his neck, tongue lapping over the bite marks you leave afterwards.  

Jake chuckles at your feverish suckling onto his skin, never objecting to being marked by you. He tugs on the leather gloves with his teeth, pulling them off and throwing them on the floor, fingers immediately going down to follow your lead and dispose of your top. You’re only wearing underwear underneath the big t-shirt you sleep in and the sight makes Jake’s mouth water. He runs his hands over every inch of your burning skin, impatiently unclasping your bra as you’re still busy with his bruised neck. 

You pull away, visibly pleased with yourself, then lift yourself on your arms and smother his swollen lips again. Jake grunts, kissing you almost just as fervently, hands going lower and lower until he grabs a handful of your ass and rolls his hips up into yours. 

You let out a whimper at that, an even louder one following when his slim fingers skim over the soaked cotton of your panties. 

“You need to be quiet, doll,” he chuckles breathlessly, drowning the sounds you make with his lips when he slips his fingers underneath the fabric and gets a feel of your slick pussy. “I don’t think we would want your parents walking in on us like that, hm?”

“Y-Yeah,” you stumble out, shifting as you’re laying flat on his chest, face buried in his collarbone and eyes fluttering when his moves only grow bolder. You shudder slightly, feeling his long digits teasing your clit with butterfly touches. 

“Ease up, pretty girl,” Jake coos, other hand wrapping around your waist to keep you steady when the first of his now soaked fingers slips inside your tight hole. You nuzzle into him further, breath becoming unsteady as you whine quietly. He moves his hand, burying it deeper and skimming it over your walls. 

Couple seconds later he adds in the second finger, the heel of his palm pressing to your clit and making you jolt slightly in his firm hold. He strokes inside you slowly, feeling you progressively getting wetter with his every push. You’re panting, hot breath hitting his skin and making his dick twitch in his pants. 

He’s plunging his fingers deep inside of you, your walls squeezing him and stretching out his lips with a satisfied smile. You can’t help but buck into the air in the little space that Jake gives you, when he picks up on his pace. His fingers thrust in and out of you, one by one, never losing their rhythm. 

Curving his fingers, his knuckles brush against the spongy insides of your hole, making you moan shakily. 

“You good?” He asks, the hand on your waist caressing you gently. 

You sigh, hands reaching up to squeeze his shoulders. “Yeah,” you whisper because that’s all of your voice that you can muster. 

“Yeah?” He can’t help but tease and you can hear the grin that’s plastered on his pink lips. But this time you only respond with a nod of your head. 

With your face buried in his skin, hands wrapped around his neck tightly, you know you’re cumming when the warm wave hits your stomach breathlessly. You’re whimpering in his collarbone, really trying your hardest to keep quiet, but with the twitching pleasure spreading through your body, and his hard bulge pressing into your stomach, it’s quite difficult to stay sane. 

Jake gives you a second to breathe before removing his dripping fingers and unbuckling his pants with it. He somehow manages to shake out of his jeans while keeping you steady on his chest and you shiver when you can feel his warm cock resting between your bodies now. 

“Stay still for me, baby,” he coaxes you before shifting you on his hips. 

Next second, you can feel his tip prodding at your sensitive pussy and he glides his cock between your glistening folds, coating it in your slick. He readies you with a squeeze at your waist, and slowly starts sinking his length inside of you.

“Wait, Jake-,” you choke on your words when he buries himself entirely inside of you, stretching you out and making you lose your composure completely. “I’m still s-sensitive,” you mumble out, about to nuzzle your face in his neck when his hands grip your waist. 

“Now, up you go,” he says and lifts you up, making you sit on his hips and take in even more of his cock. 

You moan rather loudly, sinking your teeth in your bottom lip to stop yourself from spilling any more sounds. Jake slowly rolls his hips up into you, quiet grunts leaving his own mouth as his hands settle on your hips. He starts guiding you up and down carefully until you’ve fully adjusted to him.

He only lets go once you’ve picked up on a steady pace, bracing your hands on his stomach, the feeling of his hardened muscles making your cheeks heat up. The way your pussy spreads around him is making him go crazy, and now and then he realizes that the combination of feeling you topping him and looking so fucking pretty at the same time, is nothing less than lethal. 

You’re so soft under his hands, soft around his cock, soft hands pressing on his abs – everything about you is so damn soft. You’re making him feel almost too good. To ground himself, one of his hands goes up to your hair and tugs on it slightly, making you arch your back and show your pretty, glistening with sweat neck. 

He grits his teeth when you speed up slightly, eyes misty and sparkling down at him in your dimly lit bedroom. You’re riding him so well, taking his heavy cock with little struggle.

“So good,” he pants out, fingers digging into your ass. “You’re doing so good.”

You can feel your muscles straining whenever you lift yourself up, tired legs making you drop down onto him a little more forcefully than you initially planned but you’re rewarded with his low moan and eyes shutting tightly, long lashes brushing over his cheeks. 

The room feels almost too hot, the house is too quiet for the lewd noises coming out of both of you. Your rhythmic bouncing on his aching cock soon changes to messy grinds as your knees give out and thighs burn. Your movements are shallow and visibly weakened, so to help you up, Jake brings his knees higher and roots his heels into your mattress only to thrust up into you, meeting your hips halfway.

You mewl, your legs twitching when he makes your hole take even more of him. He can feel your slick mixed with his precum seeping out and covering his stomach, and he desperately needs more. 

Swallowed by the haze, you push your hips backwards and try to meet his thrusts, making his moves stutter and a strangled groan bubbles up his throat.

“You’re so fucking tight,” he says through clenched teeth before grabbing you by your hips and pulling you off of him. Before you get the chance to ask what he is doing, you find yourself with your back slammed to the mattress, and Jake’s hands grabbing your calves and throwing them over his shoulders. 

When he enters you again, you feel your eyes rolling back a little but before any sound can make its way out of your throat, Jake’s veiny hand slaps over your mouth as he leans his face closely to yours. Your whimpers are muffled now as he picks up on his previous pace and the now changed position makes your walls clump down on him even fucking tighter. 

“Keep it down. We don’t want your mom barging in and seeing her daughter folded in half like a slut, do we?” His words only make you moan louder as your fingers dig into his toned shoulders. At your reaction, Jake’s lips spread with a sly smile as he raises his eyebrow. “Do we?” He asks breathlessly, watching as your eyes glisten in the dark room. “You really wanna get caught? To let somebody see you like that? Naughty, fucking, girl. Well, there you go.”

His hands leave your mouth and settle on your stomach instead. You just can’t predict his moves anymore, too absorbed in the pleasure spreading through your body, so when he pushes onto your stomach and presses you even deeper into the mattress, a loud moan ripples out of your lips. Jake groans too as he can feel himself moving so deep inside you underneath his fingertips. He pushes onto you even harder. Your head rolls backwards until you’re nearly facing the headboard.

It’s quite difficult to breathe and you’re not sure whether it’s from the stifling summer air that’s gotten into your room or the veiny hand that’s suddenly latched onto your throat. His hot cockhead seems to be hitting everywhere where you need it most. Nothing but dumb squeaks leave your parted lips and he thrives off of every single one of them, even deepening his thrusts to hear them grow louder.

His thighs clash into yours loudly and you yelp when he leans even more forward and the one hand that’s currently not on your throat clutches the headboard tightly. You can’t even do anything when the wood starts rattling against your wall. 

“You like getting fucked like this? Who would’ve thought,” he hums, grinning down at you with the teasing glimmer in his eyes. 

His thrusts are deep, making the tip of his cock kiss your cervix over and over again. The moans you sob out are like a shot of adrenaline in his veins, better than any drug he’s ever tried and suddenly the thought of having you to himself only for the next week crosses his mind. He’s not sure how he’s supposed to breathe without you now that he’s almost sure he’s addicted to you. 

He works his length deep inside you. Your vision threatens to turn black and you’re already out of breath when he presses onto your throat a little harder. You send him a half-lidded look and he moves his hand away from your throat to push your sweaty hair away from your forehead because nothing can fucking take the sight of your fucked out face away from him. 

Your lips are parted with the ragged breaths leaving them, hands fisting his hair and legs beginning to tremble against his chest.

“So pretty, all for me. All because of me.” You nod thoughtlessly at his words, mind taken over by the feeling of the soon to be approaching high. “So lewd too. Where did your shame go?” 

“C- Close,” is all you’re able to say. You can feel every vein on his cock more prominently with every next thrust of his, all of your senses besides touch evaporating. You can’t even hear any more of his dirty words when your climax hits you like a truck, making you let out a loud moan. 

Jake wraps one of his arms under your waist and lifts you up slightly, now folding you in half and making your orgasm hit twice as hard. He slows his hips down for a moment to help you ride it out, thrusting his dick with deep strokes. 

He’s letting go of you soon enough, quickly forgetting about your sensitive self as he feels the twitching and aching between his legs begin, waiting for his own release. With a groan, Jake braces both of his flexing arms on the headboard and ruts his heavy cock into you feverishly, making you see stars and cry out of overstimulation. 

You have to bite on his shoulder to stop the sudden scream from leaving your throat, your whole body ricocheting with his hard thrusts. Your thighs are drenched and so are his, so the skin slapping against skin sounds even louder than before, leaving the backs of your plush upper legs red and stinging. 

He loves having you like that, limp because he’s fucked you just that good but body no less responsive to all that he keeps giving you. 

“So fucking good,” he repeats himself before abruptly pulling out of your spasming pussy. “Get down here, baby.”

Your heart pounds in your chest as you only nod and eagerly pull yourself down on the bed with your wobbly legs. Once you’re lowered enough, Jake angles his swollen cock right above your face and strokes himself quickly, only to couple seconds later cover your face with the thick white ropes of his release. You flinch slightly, closing your eyes as the warm liquid hits your cheeks, lewdly licking everything that’s sputtered over your lips. 

“Oh, fuck!” Jake groans, a little pitchier than before, nonetheless just as pretty. You lift your head up from the mattress and swiftly engulf his leaking tip with your lips, milking him until he’s dry. Jake shudders above you and moans, watching you through almost closed eyes as you suck on his softening cock. 

You pull away when there’s nothing else to take from him and the doe eyed look you’re giving him makes him weak in the knees. He drops down next to you, brushing your hair away from your cum stained face before giggling and picking up the shirt you’ve thrown on the floor. He gently cleans you up with it, then leans forward to drown you with his lips. 

You could kiss him for eternity, be buried with his soft lips on yours. He’s gentler now, pressing his mouth on yours and leaving peck after peck on them.  

“I think I’m in love with you,” he whispers suddenly, hazy, nose brushing against yours and making you smile the softest smile at him. “There’s never gonna be anyone else like you, YN.”

And with your heart in your throat, you can only swallow harshly and speak through your clenched throat. “Love you too, Jake.”

There’s silence between the two of you for a moment as you just stay in the moment. Heavy breaths, gentle touches brushing against each other’s bodies and soft voices making promises you most likely won’t be able to keep.

“You won’t forget about me, right?” You whisper quietly, looking up at him with misty eyes as he glazes his thumb over your bottom lip. 

He shakes his head immediately, flashing you this charming smile of his you’ve gotten so used to over the past two months. 

“How could I?” He’s just as quiet. Then he gently takes your hand in his and presses it to his chest, allowing you to feel the hammering of his heart. “All of this is yours. I’ll wait for you.”

And that’s all you need to hear right now. 

The two of you get dressed, giggling and smiling like fools as there’s nothing much left to say. Your hip is leaning on your dresser when he steps closer and kisses you again, sucking on your lips sensually and slowly, procrastinating as long as he can only to not part with you yet.

His gloves are back on his hands, helmet under his arm as he turns back to you and tries one more time, grabbing your smaller hand in his. “Go out with me now?” 

You don’t know how you’ll be able to face your parents tomorrow. 

You don’t wanna say goodbye to him tonight. 

So with a smile on your lips, you nod your head and climb out of the window – hands intertwined together and his helmet safely tucked on your head.

But he was so much fun and he had such weird friends

And he would take us out to parties and the night would never end

taglist: @luvkpop @yannew @hoonxclsvly @jongseongslvr @beomgyusonlywife @starggukies @koizekomi @ineedsomezzz @starl1ghtsinthedark @enhastolemyheart @seokseokjinkim @parksunghoonsgf @skzenhalove @somekpopshiteu97 @enhypens-hoe @alpha-mommy69 @jwnzlvr @wondipity

permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @dilucsleftshoelace @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @seongiewon @nichoswag @s00buwu @mon2sunjinsuver @goreconsumer @i4kt @heehoonsnemo @seongslutt @criminalyun @kissestojapan

[ivyasproperty]

Hold me, console me.

natasha.r x fem!reader

summary — good things never come for ex hydra experiments, well that's what you had always thought. but a certain redhead is determined to prove you wrong.

warning(s) : cursing ( just a bit ), some mentions of anxiety

word count : 1.03k

A/N : istg this fic took me FOREVER TO WRITE because i was lazy ( oops ), so i hope you guys enjoy it cuz its kinda sloppy.....

You'd already been apart of the avengers for a few months now, and that meant living in the avengers compound. And even though you've been living with the heroes of New York for the past 7 months, you've always felt out of place in the team. Your team members worked in sync, always backing each other up without needing to vocalize it, but there was you, who struggled to even maintain a conversation with them. That was the main reason why you decided to take less part in missions, and of course Fury bit you in the ass for it, nothing got out of his sight after all, even after losing an eye. But there was also another reason, being an ex-hydra experiment took it's toll on you. You knew you were never the kind of person to harm others, but the words that the guards of doctors at the hydra facilities would yell at you always stayed in the back of your mind and gnawed at you.

ᯓ★

You had once again turned down the offer of helping out in a mission from Steve. He was a nice guy, so it hurt your heart after seeing the worried and upset look on his face. Steve Rogers was the person who had saved you from the hell hole you were raised with, alongside Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff. Speaking of Natasha, you may or may not have harbored a huge small crush on the said spy after staying at the compound. The confidence that radiated off of her had always inspired you to be better, but you guessed it wasn't enough since you've been locking yourself inside your room for the past few weeks. You could tell your behavior was worrying others, you weren't always the cheery type but you'd at least hang around in the kitchen or joined them for movie night, but as your anxiety became worse, you grew cold and snarky, barely coming out of your room during both day and night.

Tony Stark, being the person he was, wanted to barge into your room and confront you. The others protested but he wouldn't relent, not wanting to hurt his ego after shouting so loudly. But he seemed to shrink into himself a bit after receiving a glare from the redheaded assassin. She was the most worried one out of all your teammates, and rightfully so, considering how she was the one to take care of you after the avengers took you under their wing.

Natasha had knew long ago about the crush you had on her, you were discreet with it yes, but nothing could get past a highly trained assassin. Natasha had tried to brush the fluttery feeling she felt in her belly after finding out, thinking it was just her imagination. But as days went by and you not coming out of your room, she got even more worried, so worried that she had broken into your room once just to check on you. It was then that she realized that she liked you too.

"I'll talk to her, Tony," her voice left no room for an argument as she got up from her seat on the couch and left the room in search of you. Tony had wanted to tag along, wanting to see what was about to unfold but was stopped by a hand gripping strongly onto his wrist. "Leave her be, Stark. She'll know how to handle it, and you need to stop meddling in other people's business." Wanda knew of your struggles, considering how she was also an ex-hydra experiment, so she knew you needed time and space.

Tony being Tony, denied the accusation of meddling in other people's business. Your teammates groaned, done with his shenanigans and left the room, but not before a small banter between them and the big boss.

ᯓ★

Natasha walked to your room in a hurry, not wanting to waste a single second. She knew the way to your room by heart, she always visited you during the night and waited outside your door, just in case you decided to come out of the confinements in your room.

Once she had reached your room, she knocked on your door, calling out your name. She wasn't surprised that there wasn't a response and decided to just pick lock her way through your door. She knew it was wrong but she didn't seem to care anymore. She needed you to come out of your room, she needed to see you.

After she successfully pick locked your door, she was met with you under your covers with trash littered everywhere in your room. It was obvious you weren't taking care of yourself. You noticed a presence in your room and turned to look towards your door, not that surprised at the shocked look on her face that disappeared and was replaced with a worried look. You didn't know why but all the emotions that were bottled up inside of you suddenly burst out and you started sobbing like your life depended on it. Natasha, quickly breaking out of her stupor, ran to your side to console you.

"It'll be alright, I'm right here, malysh." You didn't know how long your cried for, you didn't care how long you cried for. Natasha was there for you and you didn't care about anything else but that.

After calming down and drying your tears, she cupped your cheeks and placed her lips on yours. Your eyes went wide in shock, not knowing what to do. You could feel her smile against your lips, amused in your reaction. "You'll be alright, I''ll always be here to help you through it, alright?" You could feel tears welling up in your eyes again, but for a completely different reason.

Even though you knew it'd take time for you to feel like you were a part of the team and open up about it to them, you didn't seem to dwell on the matter. Your mind was somewhere else as confessions were whispered into the dead of night into your bedroom with your lover, that you knew would be there to hold you and console you, even in your worse times.

A/N : NO BC THIS IS SO BAD IM CRYING, i regret being lazy and procrastinating on this one bc it turned out so rushed to me, but i hope you guys still enjoyed it >< feel free to leave requests anytime!!!!!

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

somewhere in the back of your mind, you know this isn’t how things should be.

your living room is dimly lit, illuminated only by the tv in front of you, and the moon is glowing a pearlescent blue. flimsy strings of moonlight spill over your floorboards, reflecting off the windows, and whatever you’re doing isn’t what you should be doing. you shouldn’t be awake this late, shouldn’t be gorging on sweets before bed, shouldn’t be having a rendezvous with an enemy — shouldn’t be watching movies with your ex of ten years. 

most of all, you shouldn’t be feeling nearly this content.

getō is seated right beside you, legs comfortably spread, popping a macaron into his mouth. chewing it slowly, savouring the flavour. or lack thereof, you suppose — he’s digested far too many curses for his taste buds to remain intact.

or so he says, anyhow.

this time, he brought pastries with him. expensive ones, you can tell, just from the package alone; a soft pastel pink box, wrapped up in silk, golden letters etched into the front. mont blancs, macarons, two slices of strawberry shortcake. carefully picked, suited to your tastes.

(you aren’t actually too fond of sweets, anymore, but how is he to know? he hasn’t seen you in years.)

”would you like me to make us some tea?”

when you turn your gaze towards him, getō’s wearing a smile. laid-back, the slightest upward curl, tilting his head in a manner you’re far too used to. eyes shining with something keen. somehow, it feels difficult to tear your gaze away from his.

but you manage, turning forward, grasping control over your sleepy vocal cords. ”no, i’m good.”

a low hum. he’s still looking at you.

”coffee?”

”the sweets are more than enough.”

this time, a smile — one you can’t see but still somehow sense. a little bit amused. getō gazes at you with a knowing look, watches you glance at the box of pastries on your coffee table; studying you under the monochrome flicker of the tv-screen. 

”understood,” he finally quips, leaning back into the leather couch. exhaling a little breath. ”eat as much as you’d like. i bought them for you, you know.”

you nod, nibbling at a macaron. not glancing his way.

being alone with him still feels a little awkward. a little tense — to be curled up on the same couch, watching the same movie, just like your old sleepovers in high school. there’s an elephant in the room that neither of you have addressed — not since he first showed up, just a couple weeks ago, waltzing up to your apartment with a plastic bag of dvds after a decade of estrangement. wearing heavy robes, and a familiar smile. asking to be let in.

and despite every single circumstance telling you not to, you did just that. you’ve yet to refuse. 

(satoru would hate you, if he knew.)

so he’s there, right beside you, and you don’t talk about it. not his choice, not your work, not anything except the movie playing on the screen in front of you. this time, it’s one he’s seen before. beautiful, he called it, and for once you think it might be a romance — if the kiss between the main actors is anything to go by. 

you wonder if that’s why he says it.

”say, do you hate me?”

you still. freezing in place, for a moment, discontent but not surprised. he’s always been like this; breaking any illusion of peace before you can find solace in it. 

you bite back a groan, and shoot him a glance out of the corner of your eye — but he isn’t looking at you. only at the tv, at the two men, holding hands and standing on a bridge in the rain, watching the stars twinkle in the sky. and you sigh, turning your head to look at him fully, parting your lips. your voice comes out frustrated. 

”do you really want to have this conversation now?”

”when else?” he chuckles, meeting your gaze with one brow raised. amber eyes gleaming with mirth, and something else, something less practiced. ”you don’t have to answer. i’m just curious.”

you gulp down the last of the macaron, licking your lips for any leftover crumbs — unaware of how his eyes follow the movement. ”are you?”

a hum buzzes in the back of his throat, a tiny rasp. you wonder if he’s tired. ”i hadn’t expected this, you know.” he taps at his knee with the pads of his fingers, rhythmic and controlled. ”i thought it was just wishful thinking… that you’d let me come this close.”

you feel his gaze on you. it’s heavy, heavy like lead, like a loaded gun. you feel it dissect you from afar, and can’t find it in you to reach for another pastry. 

”… would you have preferred being kicked out?”

”not at all.” a little grin plays at his lips, something in his voice betraying the face he’s making. ”are you avoiding the question?” 

another sigh. you’re painfully aware of how resigned it sounds, spilling out into the open air, already filling with a sense of dread — any leftover nostalgia bursting at the seams. you want to tell him so many things, but every thread inside your mind feels all tangled up.

and, as always, getō beats you to the punch. 

”that’s fine, too.” a brief pause, a twitch of his pinkie. he closes his eyes and inhales a breath. ”because i’ll keep waiting.”

for a second, you consider not taking the bait. 

then you’re giving in. because that’s what you always do, whenever he’s involved. you watch him in the dark, pale skin enveloped by moonlight, raven hair spilling across the headrest. he looks beautiful, like this, just resting his eyes.

”… for what?” you whisper, and his answer comes without a hitch to his breath.

”for you to love me again.”

…

getō tilts his head, opening his eyes, a golden brown dragging you into their depths. he looks expectant, selfishly awaiting a response, and you’re tired. 

(unbeknownst to you, he resists the urge to intertwine your fingers, to trace every ridge and dip of your knuckles with his thumb. to squeeze your palm like a promise, something concrete.)

when your mind has managed to untangle itself, something in your gaze turns sharp. frustrated, impatient, disappointed, looking at him with a raised brow. ”you really are stupid, aren’t you?”

as fast as it came, your gaze returns to the screen in front of you. monochrome, flickering, two beautiful men. one of them is holding a gun to the other’s temple, and the victim looks appeased. the movie’s almost over.

(how very like him, to find such violence beautiful.)

quietly, you swallow down the bile building up in the back of your throat. a decade of bitter flavours. clenching your teeth, nails digging into the couch beneath you, leather on your cold fingertips. it’s a little peeled.

you wonder why you even bother being honest, when he never quite seems to return the favour.

but the room is dimly lit, and the moon is big and bright, and your ex of ten years is sitting right next to you. in your apartment, on your couch, watching a movie on your tv. when he could, should be anywhere else. he’s with you, and he pulls the words out of your throat without trying. puppeteering your heartbeat.

”… as if i ever stopped.”

silence.

you hear a gunshot ring out. low, muffled, a crackle of static. one of the men falls down to the ground, and you can’t tell who's who. the actors are forgettable, but the soundtrack is pretty. it rings in your ears like a lullaby. 

getō says your name.

it sounds the same as you remember. honeyed syllables, spilling from his parted lips, silky and sweet. he says your name like he’s asking to marry you, and you can hear the smile he’s struggling to repress.

”will you look at me?”

it’s less of a question, and more of a demand. you wonder why he even bothers asking — but you’ve never really understood the way his brain works. never understood why a burglar would bother asking the shopkeeper for permission before reaching for the register, when they’ll be leaving with the money either way. 

and you’re paralyzed, stuck in place on the couch, gaze glued to the screen in front of you. but you aren’t watching, not really, just looking. and you don’t want to see what kind of face he’s making. so you whisper;

”.. no.”

”no?” he mimics, something like a coo on the tip of his tongue. as always, you can feel his gaze, travelling down your face like a trickle of honey. ”and why is that, my dear?”

you bite down on your lip.

a long, long moment passes, and neither of you say a word. he’s looking at you, and you’re looking down at your lap, at your clenched fists. a little meek. it’s quiet, the calm before the storm, and you know exactly what’s going to happen — it’s already set in stone.

”because you’re going to kiss me,” you exhale, finally, resignation on your breath. ”and i’m going to let you.”

…

for a second, you wonder if his silence means he understands. if he can hear the desperate plea in your voice, if he can translate it correctly. 

but his fingertips graze the lines of your jaw, his palm sneaks under your chin, and he keeps you in place. turning your head to meet his gaze, his amber eyes, dripping with something hungry; something pleading. 

this time, he doesn’t ask for permission. he leans forward until there’s no space between you, tips your head back, and kisses you with bated breath — as softly as he can manage, which is still too intense for your liking. still brimming with desperation, something carnal, like he wants to pour his everything into the kiss but knows he shouldn’t. he tastes like tobacco.

and it’s over. 

you know it is, because your senses are flooded with him, him, him. nothing but him, the strands of his raven hair ghosting your skin, his greedy tongue licking along your teeth, large palms resting on your spine and the back of your head. you’re pliant, surrendering yourself to his touch. he’s cradling you like he loves you, and you feel like you’ve done something awful, because you have.

because you’ve let him come so close, again, invited him inside — inside of your home, your ribcage. and he won’t bother making a home for himself there, because it’s already waiting for him, untouched, between your fourth and fifth ribs.

you never bothered to get rid of it.

(that’s your sin.)

getō hums, muffled by your lips. he sounds pleased. he sounds like he’s been waiting for this for decades, and you suppose that he has. he murmurs praise that you do nothing but swallow down. everything feels too perfect, too normal, and it’s too much, too much, too much. your lips pressed together, your chests pressed together, your noses meeting in a tender touch. you choke down the noise that threatens to push past your lips, and he kisses you like a starved man. like he’s trying to drown in you.

he only pulls away once he realizes that you’re crying, and by then it’s too late. his widening eyes don’t matter, your cold hands don’t matter, the tremble of your erratic heartbeat has never mattered less. he looks at you with remorse, and it doesn’t matter. 

(he’s yours, again. and you’re his.

you can’t stop crying.)

”… i’m sorry.”

in the background, you hear the sound of gentle whispers, an ending scene. the men are talking to each other, speaking softly, and your eyes burn with tears. geto catches one of them with his forefinger, and leans forward to plant a kiss against your nose. chaste, this time. still mumbling apologies.

it doesn’t matter, because a tiny sob still breaks past your throat — and you know the sound must hurt him. 

you hate that. you hate that you always hurt him, hate that you care, hate that you feel nothing but guilt when he’s around. you hate the movie still playing to your left, hate that he doesn’t hate it, hate that he loves you. hate that you love him, that you probably always will.

you hate that you blink up at him with glassy eyes, swallow down a shaky breath, and kiss him again. hate that it’s still the only thing you know how to do well.

he doesn’t pull away, only biting back a noise of surprise — but he makes sure to kiss you gently, as if you’re made of porcelain, slow and tender, cradling you closer still. he wipes away your tears with his thumb, one after another, and you hate yourself because everything feels so deliriously right.

somewhere in the back of your mind, you know that what you’re playing is a losing game. 

(he’s yours, and you’re his. it’s already set in stone.) 

[rin-solo]

I love. LOVE. Get In the Water

It's one of the objectively best songs in the musical; I will die on this hill.

Poseidon was always, despite being pretty much the main antagonist of EPIC, a really underdeveloped character in my opinion. He just needed a little more nuance, and the fact that one (+ kind of one more) song managed to add so much to his characterization pretty much exclusively through subtext and implications is incredibly impressive writing. Because it did!

At the start, he's yet again playing games with Odysseus, the way he did in Ruthlessness. In both songs, he could kill him easily at any point, yet he chooses not to for the sake of playing games. In Ruthlessness, this becomes his own hubris as it leads to Odysseus escaping.

If you listen closely, at the start of GITW he already sounds slightly different. He's still trying to keep up this "God of Ruthlessness" front that he's so proud of, but he's no longer more or less carefree the way he was in Ruthlessness. He's been obsessing over this feud for ten years, and even if he would never admit it, it's actually clear just from his voice that he really is tired of it too. Not in the sense of it emotionally draining him the way it probably does Odysseus, but in the sense that it's a bother, a loose end in his life, a book that he finally wants to slam shut.

But he still has a reputation to uphold, and he still cannot close this book until Odysseus is dead, so he keeps up the game. Instead of just killing him, he's taunting him to kill himself. He might associate the idea of just striking him down with a sort of loss, like then he'd have to get his hands dirty. Then he's rambling about killing his people, his family. He's provoking Odysseus on purpose, likely trying to get him to snap back, to hate and fear him the way that Poseidon would think any mortal who has consumed this much of his time should. In his eyes, Odysseus deserves nothing less than to curse him with his last breath as his "darkest moment," the god who became the bane of his life.

And Odysseus replies, of all things, with ... sympathy.

Honestly, I don't blame Poseidon for being speechless for three full seconds. He literally just threatened to gauge Telemachus' eyes out the way Odysseus did with Polyphemus, and this absolute madlad of a man replies with an acknowledgment that he (might have) caused Poseidon pain too.

Now, I don't really think Poseidon was particularly hurt over Polyphemus' loss, or hurting in any way in that moment (if he were, I highly doubt he'd still be playing games, and he would've mentioned his son as opposed to speaking about his reputation.) But just the fact that Odysseus acknowledges that he might be hurting too is probably something Poseidon hasn't heard in ... who knows how long? His family is the Olympians. I don't think I have to say more.

It's actually more of a genuine apology than Odysseus' explanation in Ruthlessness ... (even though that was also a perfectly fine apology by Greek standards, as far as I'm aware.) Now he doesn't say "sorry" because he's still not sorry for hurting Polyphemus, since he still needed to do that in order to escape. But he expresses regret over the pain he caused in a more genuine way than ever.

I am convinced that Poseidon is utterly unfamiliar with sympathy or mercy. He's lived by his "Ruthlessness is mercy" motto for centuries, and he doesn't know anything else. No one would try to teach him something different. The other gods all live by this logic, even if he's the most vocal about it considering he seems to have made it his whole personality. Mortals wouldn't dare to question Poseidon in the first place. And barely anyone would be willing to treat someone with kindness who is in turn treating everyone around them with ruthlessness.

It's very likely that Poseidon hasn't encountered anyone like this until Odysseus. Ruthlessness is simply how he treats people and also how he expects to be treated back. The fact that Odysseus doesn't, the fact that instead of hating, fearing, or cursing him, he acknowledges that they have both hurt each other and that it doesn't lead anywhere to still pursue vengeance, must have triggered Poseidon in an unprecedented way.

To him, this was probably the most outrageous thing Odysseus could have said in that moment. And it throws him off so much that he is genuinely speechless, and then simply replies, "I can't." ... his most genuine-sounding line in the whole musical.

I cannot stress enough how much it threw me off to hear this line; in the best way imaginable, it doesn't sound like Poseidon. It sounds almost vulnerable. Almost human. Because he is genuinely at a loss so much that he forgets to put up his "wrathful god" facade for just one second. Standing ovation to Steven Rodriguez for his whole performance, but especially this part.

And then Odysseus goes all out to say something even more outrageous: "Maybe you could learn to forgive?"

... Which is when Poseidon snaps.

Kind of understandable, honestly. There's this mortal whom he has likely fantasized about seeing pleading, hate-filled, and terrified, cowering before him for ten years now ... telling him that he ought to learn something. Even hijacking his own motif and his instrument in order to turn it on its head, "defile" it if you will.

This f*cking mortal pr*ck took his own "Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves" catchphrase and turned it into forgiveness ... Of course, Poseidon is no longer hesitating; of course, he is no longer concerned with getting his hands dirty or not. He yells "DIE!" and unleashes his ultimate move (which is really overkill for simply killing a mortal if you think about it) ... But he does it anyway because this time he genuinely means it.

... That, and I am also convinced he jumps to that in order to simply shut Odysseus up, fearing what he might do or think if he lets him go on. Because you cannot tell me that Odysseus didn't actually reach him for just one moment. He was far too thrown off guard, far too vulnerable in that one second. That moment of kindness did something to him, and he hated it. He also probably didn't trust himself to be able to keep listening to Odysseus speak like that. So, he abandons his (still very technically feasible!) blackmail/intimidation and just straight-up kills him.

This simple exchange (my favorite moment in the whole musical, actually) tells us so much about both of these characters that it makes me want to skitter and squeal in excitement.

Here is Odysseus—the very same one whom Poseidon specifically tried to teach ruthlessness—becoming the first person in a long time to offer him sympathy despite how Poseidon himself showed him nothing but ruthlessness. And then one song later, here is Odysseus showing him the consequences of not accepting said sympathy.

Six Hundred Strike and what Odysseus does to Poseidon would've not hit the same, in my opinion, if he hadn't made this offer, if he hadn't given Poseidon this way out, even if no one watching genuinely expected it to work (probably not even Odysseus himself.)

Six Hundred Strike is not Odysseus exacting vengeance If GITW proved anything about Odysseus, it's that he does not want vengeance. He wants all of the hatred and pain to be over, to the point where he is willing to let go of, and I am inclined to say forgive Poseidon for what he's done to him. Six Hundred Strike is simply Odysseus teaching him this lesson that Poseidon couldn't have learned in any other way, because he has proven in GITW that he genuinely does not speak any language besides that of ruthlessness (more on that in this essay!)

It's just the perfect representation of how Odysseus has now finally learned the balance between mercy and ruthlessness, which seems to be the core theme of the musical: Both have their time and place; one simply has to be willing to act in both ways and know when to use either. No one extreme is the solution. I am genuinely exhilarated that Odysseus finally seemed to have figured out that it's been both all along.

[777gojosgf]

THE SMALLEST MAN WHO EVER LIVED

777GOJOSGF IS TYPING…

777gojosgf: reader x ex!satorugojo

IN WHERE :: satoru gojo is indeed the smallest man who ever lived who has fucked it up with you beyond repair.

a/n: this hurts ANGST very ooc!satoru but i just wanted to write something like this for a while. and umm welcome back to me i guess…

ONE THING ABOUT YOU is that you didn’t like to give a show. no, instead you were always thinking about others and how they would feel if you were to say something. additionally you hated confrontation and especially those joined by others. it just wasn’t your style and added upon the anxiety you already felt on the daily basis due to the rocky situation you had with satoru.

you hadn’t asked him where he had been for the past week because you didn’t want to know. even though deep inside you knew that you knew enough.

there was no denying that he cheated on you with your best friend.

and perhaps that should have hurt you the most, the fact that he threw away a four year relationship just because he gave in to his desire. but it was the disrespect that hurt you the most. where did he get the nerve to treat you like that? you hadn’t done anything but love him truly for who he was and the smile he brought upon your face every single day. but you were afraid that those days had officially come to an end.

sometimes good things don’t last.

ever since shoko told you the news, you weren’t sure how to go about it. if you would wait until the both of you were back in the apartment you shared. where the memories and promises you had created with each other haunted the very same hallway where you broke down after seeing the photos of him and your best friend.

good riddance.

you whispered to yourself. good riddance.

but why was it so hard to believe?

and so, you hadn’t realized where your feet had brought you until you had found yourself on the grounds of jujutsu high. the anger that resumed inside of you made it seem as if there was a curse of a special grade roaming the area and the students knew better than to ask how you were doing. in fact, you looked terrifying.

your vision turned red and the only thing you could focus on was the terrible heartache that screamed for vengeance and an explanation.

for so far he was able to give you one.

the sound of the main door slamming in the teacher’s lounge echoed through the entire building, but unluckily for him his friends were there too.

but you didn’t care. not anymore.

because you have cared, you have been caring for years and apparently it didn’t mean shit.

the white haired male leaned against the wall as he watched you walk up to him, and some would say that he begged the gods above that he would make it out alive.

“baby—“ he started, reaching out to touch you like he always used to do but when you stood still in your tracks and flinched away from him…

he knew.

“am i a joke to you?” your question that desperately demanded an answer only made the entire room go quieter than it was before. the tension wavered through the air and he didn’t know what to say. perhaps because he didn’t expect you to ask him that out of all the things you could have.

why did you cheat? did you cheat?

but instead of that, you asked him if you were a joke to him.

“what do you mean? maybe we shouldn’t do this here—“ he once again miserably failed at trying to start his explanation because you took a step forward and all the words evaporated from his mouth while his vocal chords estranged. he didn’t dare to say a word.

“are you fucking kidding me, satoru? are you embarrassed that everyone is watching? because you didn’t care that you would embarrass me after fucking my friend, did you?”

you felt tears prickling in your eyes but not because you were sad. no, those tears had spilled in your apartment. instead, these were tears made out of pure anger. formed deep inside from the quiet resentment of him that you had tried to ignore and endure for days.

your hands trembled, “did you think i wouldn’t find out? do you believe i’m an idiot, is that all that i am to you? a pushover, a people pleaser?”

he didn’t say anything. there were tears streaming down his face as he knew that he had lost the one thing that mattered to him. four years of someone who loved him for who he was, and not for who he had to be.

someone who would have died for his sins.

and he threw it all away.

he knew that he couldn’t say anything that would change this and the way you felt, instead he was afraid that he would only ruin it. so he decided to take it.

“answer me.”

that made him snap out of his trance and he shake his head, stepping forward and meeting your eyes that were so full of fury he started to wonder if you weren’t a stranger.

“i fucked up, okay? i know that i did, and i cannot change anything that i did. and i know that it wasn’t right.” satoru muttered defeated.

but the only thing he heard was your laugh. it wasn’t a laugh he recognized. and it certainly wasn’t the one you let out the times before the two of you would go to bed but not before he made you laugh.

and at that same exact moment the two of you wondered the same thing.

do i know you at all?

but only one had the right to ask that question, of course.

“is that all you have to say for yourself? you can’t even apologize? because i have tried to figure out why you did what you did and if it was my fucking fault, satoru. after everything, i wondered if it was my fault. and i cannot believe-“ a sob made its way through your words and it was hard to keep the tears in now, but you had to. “i can’t believe this.”

“and i cannot grasp why you would. you deserve fucking prison for the way you have treated me these past weeks, making me wonder if i was the problem as to why you would ignore me in our apartment. ours! and i so desperately hate you for it.”

he leaned to touch your cheek, his hand rising and caressing it softly and you hated it that you let him.

“y/n, please. i can’t lose you. i am so sorry for what i did, but i can live with you hating me. i just can’t live without you.” his words embedded your skin and trailed up to your brain, almost planting it seeds and giving into his words,

but you had grown and knew better.

“maybe you should have decided that before you decided to throw this all away. i’m sure you have had a good laugh too considering the way you kicked the fucking stage lights. but you’re still performing, aren’t you? i would have given up my life for you every time. any fucking time. and while i was making promises and thinking about what the future upholds for us, you were busy giving into your desires.” your breathing had surprisingly calmed and the rational version of you had finally asserted itself into your veins as you wiped away the tears from your face and took three steps back.

“tell me. was it all worth it? was she good?”

what?

satoru couldn’t decide whether you actually asked him that or if his imagination was having its own little fun with him. but no, you truly asked him.

“baby don’t say stuff like that you know—“

“if you ever call me that again i will spoon the fucking six eyes out of you. now, tell me.”

fortunately the white haired male was wiser than to answer that question so he remained silent. his tears made its work onto his shirt and the crystal blue eyes that you had longed for since you laid eyes upon them, were now vibrant red.

you knew that he was feeling the same heartache like you were. the only difference however was that you were glad that he was.

“fine.“

and with that, you turned around to walk away.

but not before you stopped, turned around and threw the one thing that had mattered.

he caught the engagement ring mid-air that was a gojo family heirloom.

satoru swore that he loved you but the clues weren’t to be found.

perhaps you died dead at the altar.

“i’m leaving tonight.” you announced but it fell upon deaf ears and you let out a sigh before making your way back to the shared apartment leaving satoru behind at jujutsu high.

literally and figuratively.

after moving out the same exact day, having only taken a few personal belongings, you immediately booked the first flight out of tokyo.

that was the last time you ever saw him again.

©777gojosgf

[lionhanie]

boynextdoor playing minecraft! (ot6 hc)

what happens when boynextdoor starts a minecraft server?

word count: 1.2k i think

genre + warnings: crack LOL, cursing, written in lowercase, typos

a/n: this is so stupid LMAO. (i was playing mc earlier whos gonna match my freak)

reblogs ↺ + feedback always appreciated!

featuring… sungho as numberonecatdad! riwoo as LeeSanghyeok! (he didn’t know he was making his username when he made the account. literal full government name out there)  jaehyun as myungj4e! taesan as GiantMountain! leehan as 212121_! woonhak as xxBlockBeastxx2006! (he made it in 4th grade. says he keeps the name for the nostalgia he doesnt know how to change it)  

→ Join Server?

☆ sungho: the builder

i feel like sungho wouldn’t really be interested in playing mc “seriously” but BOYYYY get him into creative and he’s locking the hell in. ik he does NOT play when it comes to building The Ultimate Spruce Wood Base

he got sick of seeing jaehyun build dirt huts as shelter in their worlds so he took on the role of being the MAIN BUILDER… main vocal? yeah. main builder is his TRUE calling. but i genuinely think he’d be good at it LOL his attention to detail is insane

making entire mansions in survival except he doesn’t even collect the blocks himself. he just waits til people come home with them and he steals them for his builds

In the chat… numberonecatdad: who made this farm by my house 212121_: me and riwoo 212121_: y???? numberonecatdad: … LeeSanghyeok: wjats wrong with it :( numberonecatdad: it’s … so bad LeeSanghyeok: it took us 2 hrs to make btw 212121_: okay but it works numberonecatdad: HALF THE CROPS ARE TRAMPLED numberonecatdad: stay away. leave this to me

the next day its a full fledged farm. windmill in the background. beautiful fields of potatoes and wheat surrounded by a pretty fence. flowers adorning the whole thing. true masterpiece 

☆ riwoo: the noob

i think he’s not really the type to play games like mc. like give him tiny tower or something and he’s at like 400 floors.. neko atsume? he got all the cats unlocked. but MINECRAFT? idk i feel like he’s just 🙂 when he plays bc he has no idea what’s going on

everyone will be off adventuring on their own.. minding their business.. and then there's a death message in the chat saying riwoo died to something so incredibly random. everyone is just like ??? bc wdym you died to a berry bush

the members think its so cute how he’s just… there for the ride! but they can’t help but mess around with riwoo because he is truly lost  & blindly trusts everything they tell him bc he doesn’t know any better

In the chat… 212121_: riwoo stand right there LeeSanghyeok: why 212121_: ima show u a cool easter egg LeeSanghyeok: okie ^_^ LeeSanghyeok was squashed by a falling anvil. LeeSanghyeok: wat was the easter egg LeeSanghyeok: i dont get it xxBlockBeastxx2006: LKSJKJFHKJSnfd;sf GiantMountain: oh riwoo GiantMountain: if u left click u can pet the bees and they heal u LeeSanghyeok: rlly? thats cool i wanna try myungj4e: DONT DO IT LeeSanghyeok was stung to death. numberonecatdad: leave that poor boy ALONE

after that, riwoo learns to be cautious of the maknae line.... he just stays with sungho collecting flowers for his builds or lighting up the caves jaehyun explores and running from the mobs :,)

☆ jaehyun: the miner

jaehyun is definitely the type to go straight to mining when you start up a new world. the second everyone sees "myungj4e has just earned the achievement [Acquire Hardware]" they KNOW he's clocking into his full time job in the mines bye

it’s 30 mins in and he has half a set of diamond armor to his name and they’re like ?? bro we just started can you be fr rn… if any of the members ask for materials he won’t do it unless he’s getting something out of it (don’t tell anyone but he made riwoo a set of diamond tools when everyone is still using iron 😍 true romance i think)

lowkey everyone is convinced he has x-ray installed or something bc of how good he is at mining

In the chat… numberonecatdad: can i get three diamonds for a new pickaxe myungj4e: lmao NO  myungj4e: wat do i get in return numberonecatdad: how do you live in a dirt shack and have diamond armor GiantMountain: embarrassing.... myungj4e: okay making fun of the less fortunate now??? numberonecatdad: ill build u a house if u give me diamonds myungj4e: k fine  xxBlockBeastxx2006: OH BUT WHEN I ASK FOR DIAMONDS I DONT GET ANY

at the end of the day tho... he's lowkey a blessing bc if he's feeling nice enough he will hook u up with ANYTHING u need. the boys are spoiled w the way jae's chests are FULL of iron whenever they need it

☆ taesan: the fighter

unironically i think taesan would just be . oddly good at pvp. it’s like one of his random talents LOOOL "good at mc pvp" on his resume LOUD AND PROUD

like you load up into bedwars or something and he’s wiping out teams before you can even get yourself a proper set of armor. its lowkey attractive idk

in your survival world, he’s always instigating fights with the other members in hopes that they’ll want to fight. literally no one can kill him. he can probably 1v5 and still win

In the chat... myungj4e: WHO TOOK THE DIAMONDS FROM MY CHEST WHILE I WAS OFFLINE LeeSanghyeok: it was taesan GiantMountain: …what are u gonna do about it bro. huh. they’re mine now.  myungj4e: bro that was like a full stack. it took me like 3 hours to get them. where the hell are you  GiantMountain: why? you wanna fight for it? GiantMountain: whoever wins keeps the diamonds xxBlockBeastxx2006: oh ur cooked hyung myungj4e: OK DEAL myungj4e was slain by GiantMountain using Diamond Sword.

the way u can hear jaehyun RAGE through the dorm walls brings a smile to taesan's face bc he KNOWS he stays undefeated when it comes to pvp

☆ leehan: the troll

i think he’s similar to riwoo in the sense that he doesn’t rlly know whats going on but once they start their server you know DAMN well he’s looking up Top 15 BEST Ways To ANNOY Your FRIENDS in Minecraft! on youtube.,.. fucking loser (hearts in my eyes as i write this)

they’re usually harmless ones, like filling up jaehyun's chests with junk or renaming sungho's cat to something stupid like “Poopy Fart” or moving all of woonhak's cows from their pen

but ohh… if you piss him awf BADDD i think he would do some DIABOLICAL damage to the world. like imagine taesan is Also Trolling and he kills leehan before taking all of his stuff and running away into the distance. things would be quiet… too quiet…. until next thing u kno theres a whole trap waiting for taesan the second he walks into his house 

In the chat… 212121_: taesan do u still have my fishing rod GiantMountain: ye lol 212121_: can i have it back GiantMountain: LMAO GiantMountain: no 212121_: i think theres a creeper in ur house  GiantMountain: WHAT  GiantMountain was killed by magic while trying to escape 212121_.  numberonecatdad: LOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLL GiantMountain: when the hell did you set that up 212121_: >:)

OKAY YES he spent 46 minutes following a tutorial on how to set up a death chamber full of the WORST potion effects ever ... but it worked so he's sitting at his monitor feelijng like an evil mastermind

☆ woonhak: the sweat

he is like the only one i imagined actually PLAYED minecraft growing up. he unironically enjoys watching minecraft streams too LMAO much like jaehyun, i think woonhak goes straight to mining in survival. except rather than /just/ mining, he’s literally trying to beat the game 

he's usually off on his own doing something but ngl .. i bet he's a backseat gamer when he see's someone doing smth wrong. let's say he's out exploring w riwoo and he's falling SO FAR BEHIND he doesn't know how to sprint he will literally walk into his room to show him how to run

bro probably watched Ender Dragon Speedruns growing up idk i feel like he’s determined to beat the world record (he won’t, but he will definitely try) 

In the chat... xxBlockBeastxx2006 has just earned the achievement [The End?] numberonecatdad: ? 212121_: ?? 212121_: is that what i think it is myungj4e: ../?//???? ?  ??? LeeSanghyeok: wat is that LeeSanghyeok: whys the achievement purple GiantMountain: r u fr rn 212121z: LMAO tryhard alert... xxBlockBeastxx2006: yooo chill we can always respawn it dw myungj4e: HOW DARE U KILL THE ENDERDRAGON WITHOUT US myungj4e: UR FAKE AS HELL xxBlockBeastxx2006 has been banned from the server by myungj4e

woonhak doesn't talk to jaehyun for the rest of the night (he's unbanned the next day, but they force him to restart so he isn't absolutely STACKED)

taglist: @onedoornet @dongminz (ty saki for supporting me with my bonedo mc thoughts LMFAO) @gluion @icyminghao

© lionhanie 2024 ; all rights reserved!

[theyluvangel]

SVT - dom, sub, or switch

just a lil thought for now, I might add more later

i got carried away with a few of them

MDNI

S.coups

dom for sure

he'll be hard or soft, slow or quick

everything he does is up to you

he'd rather die than hurt you in an un-pleasurable way

probably has some hard kinks like spanking or bondage

Jeonghan

switch. either a hard dom or bratty sub

whether he's above you or below you, he'll always be teasing you

sometimes you'll have to lay there and take it, other times you have to be the one to fix his attitude

loves dressing up in more feminine clothes for you

loves giving and receiving degradation

Joshua

soft dom

i fully believe this man is a gentleman in and out of the bedroom

loves missionary

i don't really have much to say about him sorry guys

Jun

switch

this man is into softer things

praise giving and receiving

will let you peg him

lowkey has a thing for plushies being involved

probably one of the sweetest members to have sex with

Hoshi

complete 50/50 switch

will let you ruin him one day, then he'll ruin you the next

sometimes you'll both dom and sub in one session

main goal is for neither of you to be able to walk in the end

this man has incredible stamina, he could and would fuck you all day

gets so turned on seeing you on top of him

cowgirl is his favorite position

loud AF he has no shame

Wonwoo

dom but would sub if you asked very nicely

really caring and attentive to your needs

likes to cokwarm while he's gaming

doesn't make a lot of noise, only low groans and moans

is main goal is to fuck you so good you're shaking

likes watching you ride him

always makes sure you cum first

Woozi

switch

sex with him doesn't always have a strong power dynamic

but sometimes if he's tired or if he's super needy he just wants to be taken care of

or sometimes if he had a rough day he'll just come home and ravage you

studio sex at least 2 times a week

MUNCH

i lowkey think he has a high heel kink because he likes when you're taller than him

will get so turned on if you wear red lingerie

DK

switch but leans toward being a pleasure dom

all about you when it comes to sex

tell him what you want and you'll have it

if you want to dom him all the time, he'd love that! if you want him to dom you all the time, that's great!

if you're happy then he's happy

big on praise, giving and receiving

he's a silly guy, so chances are sex is full of giggles

also one of the sweetest to have sex with

Mingyu

so many people write this man as a dom, and I strongly disagree. this man is a sub.

he may look big and intimidating, but he's just a big baby

sure he could fuck you missionary or doggystyle, but you'd still be in charge

loves a mix of praise and degradation

there's a clip of woozi saying mingyu likes being scolded and embarrassed by the members soo....

big baby. golden retriever man all the way

he's so whiny

probably a crier

loves being edged or overstimulated

The8

dom

i think he's the traditional type of man that thinks the main goal of sex is the woman's pleasure

would not even think about letting you do any work

if you aren't already a pillow princess, well you are now

not very loud, but I think hes big on dirty talk

curses in Chinese

also loves bondage

seeing you tied up with pretty silk gets him so turned on

Seungkwan

sub.

this man is a pillow princess

makes jokes the whole time

loves wearing lingerie

VERY vocal

literally so loud

please praise him he deserves it

Vernon

see I can't see sex with Vernon having a strong power dynamic

hes a chill guy, he just goes with the flow

loves cowgirl and reverse cowgirl

he has a sex playlist.

swears so much

buries his head in your neck if he's in a position that allows him to

Dino

switch leaning sub

MOMMY KINK

calls you mama in and outside of the bedroom

could dom you, but why would he do that when he has you to take care of him?

probably doesn't have much experience

needs your reassurance

also needs you to tell him what to do to make you feel good

guided masturbation happens regularly between you two

gets turned on so easily

[princessanonymous]

Of Trials- Part 1/3 (Ask)

Platonic Yandere Vampire

Next Part

Story Chapter list

This is from an ask someone sent to me privatly. I liked the idea so much that I decided to make multiples little chapters. I think I will write two other chapters after this one. Keep in mind that you'll need to read the main story, When Night Comes (Linked aboved) to understand this. :)

┉┈◈◉◈┈┉

Reading under a dimly lit candle was an activity Dorian quite enjoyed when he was on his own. It gave him a moment to ponder on things and relax. As the night wore on and the hours melted away, he found himself lost in contemplation, the outside world a mere whisper in the recesses of his mind. His husband and daughter, out attending to their nocturnal needs, left him to his own devices, a scenario he relished.

Soon, however, his moment of quietude was abruptly disturbed by a person knocking at the door downstairs. Startled from his reverie, he glanced at the clock, puzzled by the uncharacteristically early return of his family. Concern etched his features as he pondered the reason for their abrupt return. He wondered if perhaps something had happened. Before he could ponder further, a soft servant's voice echoed from below, announcing the presence of an unexpected visitor. Setting aside his beloved books, he rose from his comfortable armchair and made his way down the creaking stairs, his footsteps echoing in the silence of the house.

The first thing he noticed was the lack of heartbeat. His senses on high alert, he tensed, his gaze narrowing as he assessed the stranger before him. The individual had yet to be invited in, but he knew that even an uninvited vampire was not to be trusted.

The woman's presence exuded an aura of refinement, her brown locks cascading gracefully around her face, which bore the hallmark crimson hue of a recent feeding. Despite the evidence of her nocturnal activities, she appeared immaculate, a testament to her self-discipline and restraint. Her poised demeanor hinted at years of experience, suggesting a vampire of considerable age and standing within their society. Yet, for all her apparent prestige, he found himself unable to recall encountering her at any of the prestigious gatherings that dotted their social calendar.

More striking, however, was the peculiar sensation stirring within him, a faint echo of recognition dancing at the edges of his consciousness.There was a form of familiarity there, he knew that woman. From where, he didn't know. And that was a scary thought.

He stood there in front of the door and she just looked at him and smirked, having seen a form of curious recognition in his eyes. "Leaving a guest outside, how impolite."

Summoning his resolve, he met her gaze squarely, his voice edged with a mixture of apprehension and defiance. "Who are you?" he demanded, his words echoing in the dimly lit foyer.

In response, she offered a chilling laugh, her demeanor unyielding in the face of his inquiry. Clenching his jaw in frustration, he awaited her response, steeling himself for whatever revelations lay ahead. "You may call me Elizabetta," she declared, her voice dripping with an icy arrogance that sent a chill coursing through him. "Your younger sister."

 It was as if all the air had been sucked out of his lungs, leaving him gasping for breath in the wake of her revelation. A sensation long forgotten, buried beneath the layers of his immortal existence, clawed its way to the surface, reminding him of the vulnerability that lingered beneath his immortal facade. His mouth went dry, parched as if he hadn't tasted blood in months. With each futile attempt to form words, his throat constricted, constricting like a vice around his vocal cords. Finally, in a barely audible whisper, he dared to voice the question that weighed heavily upon his mind.

"From the same sire?" he inquired, his voice barely more than a hoarse murmur. He cursed himself for stating the obvious, for grasping at straws in the face of this unsettling revelation.

She acquiesced curtly, "I was turned twenty two years after you. Mikhail took me in, taught me everything. May I come in? We have some matters to discuss."

The urge to slam the door shut, to banish this unwelcome intruder from his threshold, surged within him like a tide of fury. He harbored no desire to revisit the memories of his sire, to confront the horrors of his transformation that still haunted his darkest dreams.  Memories of the red glow in the night – the pain, the screams, and the thirst, and then the blood and rain on his shivering form – came flooding back in. 

Yet, somehow, with all that, he found himself inviting her in. With a grace that belied her vampiric nature, she stepped across the threshold, her presence casting a dark shadow over the once serene atmosphere of his abode. She looked around the entrance hall in wonder, appraising the manor critically. Seated in the tea room, the air thick with unspoken tension, they were served tea, a customary gesture of hospitality that she regarded with thinly veiled disdain.

"The food of mortals," commented his guest with a small sneer, "Whyever would you waste your time on such things, brother?" The taunting way in which she said the last word did not go unnoticed. She had been aware of his existence while he had never thought of this possibility. She tried to assert her dominance, even in his own home.

“I have the money to spend on such things,” he bit back easily, then he chuckled. “I suppose some aren’t as fortunate." His quip earned a sour grimace from his sis– the woman, a silent acknowledgment of his victory in their verbal sparring match. Yet, beneath her veneer of disdain, he sensed a simmering resentment, a jealousy that threatened to boil over at any moment.

As the silence stretched between them, punctuated only by the steady tick-tock of the grandfather clock, their gaze locked in a silent battle of wills. Dorian savored the taste of his tea, a calculated display of indifference in the face of her scrutiny. He set his cup down with a light clank and joined his hands together.

"While this meeting was pleasant, if you do not have anything to say to me – "

"What is so special about you?" she demanded, her voice tinged with bitterness as she voiced the question that seemed to have long plagued her thoughts.

He sneered, "What are you saying?"

"He speaks of you often, constantly, ‘My greatest creation.’ he says," she announced, jealousy contorted with her sharp features, "I have been present; you haven't. Why are you his favorite?"

Dorian's laughter rang hollow in the stillness of the room, a thin veil masking the unease that gnawed at the edges of his composure. The notion that their sire maintained a watchful eye over him sent a shiver down his spine, stirring dormant fears that he had long sought to suppress.

He put a hand on his chest. "Oh, dear sister," he cooed mockingly, his voice dripping with sarcasm as he feigned pity. "Is that it? Are you here because our oh so esteemed sire does not give you the attention you desperately crave?" His words, laced with false sympathy, cut through the tension like a knife, a calculated attempt to deflect her accusations.

She gritted her teeth angrily and clenched her fists. Dorian remained steadfast in his resolve, unwilling to be drawn into her petty grievances. "Why you?" she asked again.

"I am afraid you are simply inadequate," he said with a shrug. He loved the sight of her face turning red in rage. It was such a delightful thing to see. But as satisfying as her reaction might have been, Dorian knew that this confrontation served no purpose, that her presence in his home was an unwelcome intrusion. She held no information that should concern him. He wanted nothing to do with his sire, he wanted no reminder of him yet this woman was waltzing in to involve him in her irrelevant problems. "Leave " he ordered.

"You were never -"

"I don't care!" He finally snapped loudly, losing his composure and revealing more than he intended to, "He left me! I barely know anything about him!”

But before he could gather his thoughts, a voice cut through the tension, drawing his attention away from the tumultuous whirlwind of emotions that threatened to consume him. Turning towards the sound, he found himself face to face with his beloved partner and their daughter, the unexpected sight grounding him in the present moment.

"Papa, who is that?" A small yet confident voice asked. He straightened himself and turned around in surprise. There stood his daughter (Y/n) and his partner placed protectively in front of her. Dorian hadn't even noticed their return.

"Oh, nobody starshine," he assured her. He sent a glare at the lady. "She will leave soon."

"So the rumors are true," commented the woman as she looked down at the small girl. 

"You indeed sired an immortal child." There was glee and triumph in her eyes.

At these words, Killian whispered something in the girl’s ear and (Y/N) opened her mouth to argue, but he sent her a look before leaving the room soon after. Dorian sent him a thankful look; this should not concern (Y/n).

"Leave at once," he repeated once again with more insistence.

“It is a good thing, I suppose, that I had preemptively warned the Night Council about this. You have been summoned to appear in front of them for the crime of siring an immortal child," she declared, her tone devoid of remorse as she extended the damning missive towards him.

As the letter changed hands, Dorian felt a surge of dread wash over him, a cold knot forming in the pit of his stomach.

[thebellearchives]

For your prompt event, may i request fluff prompt 12 for sukuna? 👉👈

𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐑

~ ryomen sukuna ; jujutsu kaisen

✧˚ · . S Y N O P S I S : there’s something so intriguing about the curse that lives inside your best friend, unfortunately for you the king of curses might’ve picked up on your interest

‧₊˚ c o n t e n t s : gn!reader, fluff? more like sukuna being a smug flirty bastard !!

‧₊˚ a / n : so i wasn’t sure if i wanted to give sukuna a body of his own but this is the first time i write for him and i really wanted to try and describe them as different people despite sharing the same body, so Yuuji is mentioned a couple of times ~

Toge ver. || Sukuna ver. || Gojo ver.

prompt list

In the past few days there was nothing that Yuuji and you hadn’t been doing together. In fact, to say 'past few days' was most definitely an understatement, it was more like months. He was your best friend after all, so there weren’t many things about him that would surprise you anymore. Except Sukuna.

He wouldn’t come out often, but when he did there was this electric sensation of thrill running through your skin. He was something else for sure. He’d make you nervous, curious, he’d have you at the edge of your seat. And that was exactly what was going on in that exact moment. You and your best friend had decided to watch a movie that wasn’t going to be at the cinema for much longer, so when you walked in with your popcorn and drinks there was no one else there.

The movie had started out pretty interesting, the main character was likeable, and that classic event that would take him out of his comfort zone was pretty cool too, but along the way it had just gotten a bit monotone. Or so you though, because next to you your pink haired friend had been quiet for a long time. When you finally glanced at him the black tattoo-like marks on his smooth skin let you know it was Sukuna the one who was insanely focused on the movie.

After noticing that, you were not able to focus on the movie anymore. You’d shift on your seat, sip on your drink more often that you normally would. Crossing your legs, uncrossing them instantly, leaning into the opposite arm rest, sitting normally again. You tried to fix your gaze on the screen, you really did, but somehow your eyes just wouldn’t stay put and you’d end up admiring Sukuna. You couldn’t help but study the way his whole demeanor changed, he was now laid back on his seat and with his knees angled outwards, as opposed to Yuuji who’d always keep his legs straight. His head tilted to the right, resting on his fist and a slight frown. He was comfortable in his body, his muscles were firm instead of relaxed, giving him a confident aura.

But your little study session came to an end when Sukuna caught you staring at him.

“You keep staring at me instead of watching the film” his lips curled up in a malicious smile “What's up?”

What’s up? You wish you knew.

“Nothing” you cleared your throat and tried to sit straight once again “I didn’t think you’d be into this kind of movies.”

A deep, resonant and derisive laugh left his throat.

“You’re a terrible liar, did you know that?”

The truth was that laugh of his had actually turned your insides upside down, your face flushed with a deep crimson colour.

“What was i supposed to reply, then?”

“The truth of course, like a normal human. Although I suppose humans do lie a lot.” he offered you a charming grin, but you rolled you eyes and took another sip from your drink.

“And what is that truth then, king of curses?”

“Just say you think I’m hot, sweetheart.”

“What?” you could’ve sworn your heart somehow had gotten tangled in between your vocal chords, almost making you choke on your drink.

This time his laughter was more vibrant, it was clear he was enjoying making fun of you. Did he think you were some kind of toy to use for amusement?

“You’re gonna deny it?” you frowned, swallowing nervously. You remained silent, but he insisted, leaning towards you and encouraging you with teasing words “go on, say no.”

“No.”

“Yeah, like I said, terrible liar.” he smirked, playfully stroking your cheek with the back of his index.

[chewiiez]

idol au! idol au! idol au fengqing + hualian!

ive been brainrotting on this for a while now — i do love my kpop jpop cpop guys and i wanted to explore these dynamics with xl4 !! (an excuse to watch more time to twice really) so yay let's gaur!!

so basically, xl4 is a famous group X4, shortened form of XI4NLE. a boy group, formed through a survival show.

what is a survival show? no, it's not about wilderness survival – a survival show is trainees competing against each other in order to become part of a sometimes temporary, but otherwise permanent, group! you have performance missions, activity missions, domestic and international voting, all of which determine who stays and who is eliminated. all the trainees dorm together, or maybe if the show has a special theme, the trainees are segregated based on the theme.

anyways, my theme actually came from my fav group's (twice) survival show, sixteen. in sixteen, the ceo of the company chose trainees from his own company and divided them into two categories: major and minor. major are trainees who could be debuted tomorrow if they felt like it. minors are trainees that are talented, but need to compete against majors for a better chance.

so in the X4 survival show, we have the same segregation. from our beloved quartet:

feng xin and xie lian are in the majors.

hua cheng and mu qing are in the minors.

now, let's go over their skills!

after many mental line distributions, song listening sessions, and others, i decided on the perfect skills for the quartet. (IMO)

feng xin: main rapper / lead dancer / lead vocalist / leader. i think feng xin as a rapper would be soooo good omg. spitting bars left and right! i think of him as this ace card that no one really expects from a guy who looks like a cute golden retriever. he also has good stage presence and good leadership, which makes him a well rounded idol. you'd find him on forums of people discussing "underrated idols in the cpop industry!!!"

mu qing: secondary main vocal / main dancer / visual. secondary because his main strength is dance and flexibility, but he has the second highest vocal range of the group!! he's also the visual, because in the actual tgcf fandom everyone talks about how he's so pretty and all, obviously had to include that. mu qing is a sort of enigma to many on the show because off stage he's a blank slate, but on stage his stage presence is so captivating....

xie lian: secondary main dancer / lead rapper / sub vocal / center. i think xie lian is also a very flexible dancer, considering in canon he and mq had similar weapons and cultivation, i wanted to make this connection. now as for rapping, he's really good, but his flow could use a little bit of work! sub vocal because i wanted the canon neck cursed shackle to come into play. AND CENTER! such an important position: he has the most center time in choreo because of his stage presence (note that center time ≠ iconic/hard dance moves. those may be given to mq because he's the main main dancer, and sometimes to xl.)

hua cheng: main vocal / sub rapper / fotg. yess, hua cheng is the main, main vocal of the group! he has the highest range and his voice is perfection!! i also think his flow would be good, so sub rapper. finally, fotg is face of the group, aka a member that you usually think of when you think of the group. i wanted to give this to xl but realized that when people think of tgcf so many think of hc first, so yay, the position is his. that way, everyone has an important position to maintain!

now for some lore:

hua cheng is one of the youngest contestants alongside sqx and hx on the show

feng xin wins the show because he gets the most international and domestic votes from fangirls after a performance of his goes viral

xie lian is in a close second, only 10 votes off 😭

mu qing is eliminated from the show because during one of the performances, the group forcefully gave the high note to him, but he couldn't hit it. however, yushi huang brings him back with her producers choice card.

xie lians family are big investors in the community.

feng xin and mu qing had a longstanding rivalry for the better part of their career, which only ended after the BIG jun wu scandal. (i can talk about this if people are interested.)

feng xin has written the most songs for the group, followed by hua cheng and xie lian tied, and then mu qing.

their reality TV show is called XFOURONLINE!

they debut solo in a weird order: xie lian, feng xin, hua cheng, and mu qing.

they've all gone viral multiple times.

their best charting song to date is probably from an album that took a more mature route.

please do tell me if you're interested in this au because i would love to blabber about the jun wu scandal, dynamics, and subunits, as well as the group image and other things 💖

[torialefay]

☀️ Everyday Idol 🌙 (Chapter 14)

✨ possible bangchan x reader (f), possible jungkook x reader (f)

✨ head on over to my masterlist if you haven’t checked out the previous chapters!

✨wc: ~ 13k

✨ friends to lovers? possible love triangle? obsession? angst and future smut??? a little fluff.

✨ summary: JYP Entertainment launches a new show and y/n somehow gets recruited. Even though she doesn’t particularly care about the outcome of the show, she does particularly care about one of the artists she met: Chris from Stray Kids. Does Chris feel the same or will a potential relationship with one of his friends overcome what y/n feels for him?

✨ warnings: cursing from time to time, smut!!!! 🔞

————————————————————————————

Previous Chapter Recap:

On instinct, Chan leaned in to grab his hand and tap his back. It was then when he realized just how sticky his hands were.

He pulled back, slightly embarrassed. “Sorry dude, I don’t know what I got all over myself at lunch.”

He watched in horror as Young K looked down at his hand and then down toward Chan’s feet and the floor behind him, both covered with white fluid. His cheeks went instantly red, and he knew it.

“Yeah,” Young K responded, a bit awkwardly as he made a concerned face. “No big deal,” he walked past Chan and to another stall.

‘God fucking damnit.’

—————————————————————————————

Note: Character relations you can refer back to if needed.

Y/n- Changbin’s mentee

Anna- best friend, Felix’s mentee

Kara- Seungmin’s mentee

Sunnie- Han’s mentee

Mindi- Hyunjin’s mentee

Nisha- Lee Know’s mentee

Alyssa- Jeongin’s mentee

Jenna- Chan’s mentee

—————————————————————————————

Friday, 5 PM

Y/N’s POV:

Another week had come and gone. It was a whirlwind to say the least. It felt like all of the puzzle pieces were finally falling into place.

Your week spent with Jungkook had been more magical than you could have ever imagined. Every date with him had you giggling like you were back in middle school, kicking your feet at the end of each night when you got home. Even if it was too early to say it, you *felt loved. He had a natural way of doing that. The chemistry between the two of you was so organic, it felt like he could truly melt all of your troubles away. Any little thing you struggled with, it was like he knew exactly what to say. He knew exactly what to do. Almost as if he were made you. Almost as if he was perfect... and almost as if he'd rehearsed it.

Your group had continued to work well together- no more outbursts from Jenna. She seemed to have moved on and now had her sight set on one of the male trainees… As if anyone was surprised. But hey, whatever kept her occupied and out of your hair, you took as a win.

As the main dancer, you’d stayed busy making sure that the choreography was perfect, and so far, you hadn’t had much trouble out of anyone… ‘Yet,’ you thought, not wanting to get ahead of yourself. But otherwise, vocal lessons had been great, raps were flowing more naturally, and everyone’s talents really got to be displayed. You could tell that the SKZ members were impressed today, watching the finalized practice for one of your songs.

“You guys are gonna do really well,” Chan said softly after watching all of you.

“You think so?” Anna flashed the biggest smile, clapping her hands together excitedly. All of the girls began to chatter enthusiastically as you put on a big smile as well.

Even though you were grateful for their words, you were more concerned about what JYP had to say. JYP had come in soon after, ready to evaluate you once your mentors had given you advice. Again, you were nervous- how could you not be? But also, again, the nerves melted right off as you began the performance. And you confirmed that it was for good reason as JYP sung your praises. He said that each of you were very much individually talented, but as a group, he saw a great connection. He complemented Anna as well for being able to organize the group and make sure that everything was being taken care of. Of course, he added in some very minor critiques, but overall, it was very successful. Claps from across the room soothed your mind that you could do this.

---

Friday, 9 PM

And with the team's high spirits wanting to continue on, you’d ended up with the 5 of your friends settled down on the floor of your’s and Anna’s hotel room. “Truth or Dare” had started only 30 minutes ago and you’d already had enough laughs for the rest of the week.

Mindi admitted that her first crush had been on the Powerpuff Girls’ dad.

Anna had to give Nisha (who was, by far, the quietest member in the friend group) a lap dance… and trust me when I say that she put on a show.

Nisha, however, got her revenge by being dared to send an Instagram message to anyone of her choice off of their phone. And of course that meant messaging Felix from Anna’s account about the “explosive diarrhea that she was having.”

Kara confessed that if she had to pick a crush out of the kids, she would pick Seungmin, her own mentor… You knew from that moment on that no one would let her live that down.

Sunnie had been dared to stand outside in the hallway and give out the loudest “wolf howl” she could for 5 seconds. As soon as she ran back inside the door, she almost tripped over her own feet from cry-laughing.

And the question you’d gotten… well you knew that you’d get it eventually.

“Okay, so, the question issss-“ Kara dragged out. “What is the farthest you’ve gone with your mansss?” She teased as she tried to get a blush out of you. And it worked. You still hadn’t told everyone that you were official. Well, “official” official. You were pretty sure that signing an NDA applied to them too. So maybe you could just… leave out that part? They already probably weren’t supposed to know that you were seeing him at all.

You cleared your throat before proceeding. “Welll, we haven’t slept together, so sorry to disappoint on that,” you laughed. “I mean, we really haven’t done much. I sat on his lap while we made out. And we’ve had a few steamy sessions here and there. But nothing crazy…” your voiced trailed off, waiting for a response. You were met with big, bugging eyes, like they were waiting for a response too.

“How long have you been seeing him?” Mindi asked innocently.

You had to think for a moment. “I think two, three weeks? A month? Maybe?”

“Well then you’re getting there,” she smirked. “Only if you want to, of course!” she quickly added.

“If I do, you guys will be the first to know,” you lied, adding a smile to your face. Anna’s eyes looked at you knowingly. She’d be the only one that statement would apply to, and you both knew it.

Soon after, the game moved on and revealed a lot of secrets that you’d probably otherwise never have known about your friends.

You looked at your phone with a smile before addressing the group. “Alright, who wants snacks?”

You guessed the dumb look on your face gave it away. “Oooo is your boy toy offering to get you something?” Sunnie asked with a devious little grin.

“Well, he’s offering to get US something,” you smiled. By “us”, you really meant Anna and yourself. You were the only ones who’d signed an NDA, and as far as you knew, he wasn’t aware that anyone else knew... Not that he'd been careful enough out in public for you for people to piece together who you were. Regardless, you hadn’t told him that you were with the rest of the girls tonight, so you figured he just didn’t realize.

So how could you ask him for enough food to feed 6 girls when he thought there was only two?

Let’s be honest, he would have bought anything you asked. No question. But still, you wanted to be careful.

“That is so sweet,” Kara gushed, clinging her hands to her chest dramatically. “What do you guys want?”

You tried to pipe up before anyone else could. “How about some pizzas? I’ve really been craving it.” Normally, you wouldn’t be the type to interject, but you needed to this time.

“Sounds good to me!” Sunnie smiled, gesturing her hands out as if she didn’t mind one way or the other.

“Perf!” Kara added.

Relieved that your little plan had worked, you messaged Jungkook back with your order and to thank him for everything. 30 seconds later, a call came through the line, with the name “Kookie” splaying across your screen.

You quickly stood from your position and walked over to the bathroom so you’d have a private place to take the call. In case you had to lie a little bit, you didn’t want the girls to hear.

“Hello?” you answered the phone as soon as you were out of ear shot, closing the door behind you.

“Hey baby,” you could tell he was grinning through the phone. That beautiful little bunny grin.

“What are you up to? Other than being basically the best boyfriend ever and sending me food,” you joked.

“I’m not really getting into much tonight. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t want to hang out? I know from your texts that you were worn out, so I didn’t want to push anything, but I figured I’d still ask.”

Your heart melted a little. “No, you’re right. I’m pretty exhausted. If it’s okay, I think I’ll stay in tonight. But I’d love to see you tomorrow?” you asked before you heard loud yells coming from the girls in the other room. You guessed that someone was trying to chicken out of a really bad dare.

“Yeah, that’s perfect, but… Is everything okay? I thought I heard a loud noise?” Jungkook pried.

“Oh yeah…” you said, trying to think on your feet. “I think it’s our neighbors next door. They’ve been going at it all night,” you pretended.

“It sounds like a cage match back there,” Jungkook laughed. “Do you want me to call and talk to someone about it?” he offered.

“Oh! No, that’s okay! If it gets too bad, I’ll just knock on their door. No big deal.”

“If you say so,” his voice carried up. “But anyways, back to tomorrow. How about I pick you up around 6? I’d like to take you somewhere special.”

“Somewhere speciallll?” You questioned him naughtily. “And where would that be?”

“It’s a surprise, but I think you’ll really love it,” he said.

“Is there anything special I should wear or do? You’ve got to at least give me that as a hint.”

“Don’t worry about it baby, just get ready like you normally do. I’ll take care of it.”

You couldn’t help but get nervous. Excited, but a little nervous. What could he possibly have in store that you hadn’t heard already? You smiled anyway.

“Alright, I’ll trust you this time,” you teased before taking a long pause. “I do really miss you though.”

You waited in anticipation for Jungkook to respond.

“You know I really miss you too. I miss you every day I’m not with you,” he admitted. “And just this past week… It’s really been one of the best weeks of my life.” He paused. “I know that sounds dramatic, and maybe hearing that feels too soon, but it feels nice to have someone who fully accepts me as a person and for someone to see me for my good. And I know that with time, I’ll be able to open up more about the not-so-good parts, but I know already how beautiful your heart is. And no matter how scary all of this is, you will always understand me. You make me feel like the best man in the world.”

You didn’t know what you were expecting out of this call, but not that. Jesus. For a moment, you didn’t even know how to respond. Jungkook picked up on your hesitancy.

“Oh, I’m sorry if I said too much too quickly,” he started back. “I just wanted you to know how I feel. If you don’t know about things yet, then that’s okay. But that’s how you make me feel, and I wanted you to know that it means a lot to me. You don’t even understand.”

You let out a breath, prepared now with what was on your mind. “I’m so happy I can be that for you. And I will always try to understand you. The good parts and the bad parts. There’s no one else I’d rather be with.”

Although you couldn’t see his face, you knew that your short words were making him emotional. As much as you never would have believed it, he actually did have a strong emotional side. And that was one of the reasons why you loved him.

Wait- LOVED? Okay, not love, not love. It’s not to that point yet, is it? No, it’s way too soon for that. It was an emotional reaction. You felt loved, and you had love for him, but that didn’t necessarily mean you were IN LOVE with him… At least that’s what you told yourself.

“There’s no one else I’d rather be with either. I’m so lucky with you… But I’ll let you get back to your girl’s night, okay? You rest up so I can see that pretty face tomorrow,” he almost giggled.

“I will. Goodnight sweetheart.”

“Goodnight babe.”

—————————————————

Saturday, 10 AM

Chan’s POV:

This weekend, Chan was on a mission. One to forget about you. Or, at least, to stop thinking about you.

It was ridiculous. He’d always understood that. But to think he had no self-control… well he just couldn’t accept that anymore. He would distract himself every day. Every single day. As long as it took for him to get over you. Until he could look at you and feel nothing.

Considering he’d drunkenly admitted to Changbin last week that he was in love with you, he knew this probably wouldn’t be easy.

‘One more week. One more week until Everyday Idol is over,’ he thought.

He yawned as he rolled over in bed, thankful to have yet another weekend off… However, he wasn’t so sure that it would be the most beneficial for him to have so much free time on his hands… Free time for his mind to begin to wander. So, he planned out his day accordingly.

First, he’d talk with STAY, see what they wanted to do tomorrow during Channie’s room. He’d hit up the gym, might as well. Hopefully Changbin would be- No, Changbin would definitely be there. Grab some lunch, get a shower, and then? Whatever, he thought he would just figure that part out later. Maybe Young K’s offer still stands… ‘Doubt it.’

Chan hopped on Bubble quickly to see what STAYs were up to. As he read through the thousands of messages, he couldn’t help but giggle. He decided to tease them a little. Sending a message saying “Date tomorrow?” instead of Channie’s room would make everyone go insane.

And he was right. Not even two minutes later and everyone was freaking out. Chan couldn’t help it. He loved this feeling… at his core, no matter how awkward he could be, he could also be a flirt. And a damn good one.

He figured he’d see just how much he could toy with STAYs.

He laughed as he read the comments:

Wear a tux for us Channie!!!

pls don’t wear anything 😩

You’re a cutie anyway. Whatever you want to wear is fine.

Matching hoodies?

i don’t care, just excited for a date with my babyyyyy

It always did give him a bit of a confidence boost.

After toying with STAY for a few more minutes, he messaged Changbin to see if he’d want to go to the gym. As he waited, he switched over to TikTok. Seeing funny edits always gave him a smile. He scrolled along, watching funny compilation videos and reactions to their music that people had posted. His heart felt so full every time someone complimented their music.

He switched down to the next video, which had been bits and pieces edited together of an interview they had done a few weeks ago. Chan remembers it so vividly because he’d had a huge headache all morning and he hadn’t been able to pinpoint why… it had contrasted so much with the night he’d had prior. The night he’d first hung out with you.

And here he was again, thinking about your presence. ‘Quit,’ he warned himself before shaking it off and scrolling down to the next video. He was relieved when Changbin replied that he’d already gotten to the gym, but to come on before he got too far into it.

Chan cheerily raised up from the bed and into the bathroom, quickly getting himself ready. It was never hard for him. A black tee with hoodie over top and black shorts. Black beanie, black socks, black shoes. Simple enough.

He quickly grabbed a water and a protein drink from the fridge, making sure to chug the protein down before arriving to the gym that he used.

As he walked along the street, clad in sunglasses as well, he noted what a particularly beautiful day it was. The sun was out, and it finally wasn’t as cold as it had been the week prior. As he took in his surroundings, he saw a couple of girls walk next to him who seemed to be around his age. He acknowledged that they were attractive. And this, this he could run with.

He looked out of the corner of his eye as one of the girls flipped her hair around her shoulder. Her hair was long and shiny. It fell effortlessly beautifully, the front bits layered perfectly to highlight her face.

The other girl was pretty as well. Long legs that couldn’t be missed. Pretty lips in a shade that he had to admit intrigued him.

He tried to settle his mind in on them, but as they continued to walk, Chan had met his destination. He watched in solitude as they passed by, silently thanking them for helping him remember that he could act normally, just like any other guy.

Today would be the day that things started to change.

---

After a hard set at the bench press, Chan was breathing deeply, trying to catch his breath that he felt like had left him 5 minutes ago.

“Need a break?” Changbin chuckled.

Chan rolled his eyes. “I’d like to see you do it better.”

“Challenge accepted,” Changbin smirked.

Chan quickly took back his words. He knew that Changbin would, most definitely, without a doubt, ‘do it better.’

“Nevermind! You win,” Chan said, playfully pushing him away. “10 minute break?”

“Yeah, see you back in a bit,” Changbin said, leaving to retrieve his belongings which had been placed on the opposite side of the room.

Chan grabbed the water that was seated next to him before reaching for his phone as well. He didn’t have any notifications, nor anyone particularly to text, so he settled back on the Bubble app, seeing what STAY was saying now.

He was meet with a lot more suggestive innuendos and jokes, which he’d gotten used to by now. Of course the sweet messages as well. He cracked a smile reading a few of them.

Without thinking, he reached his phone back to snap a quick selfie. Well, maybe two or three… or five before he got one he was satisfied with. He knew STAY would want to see him at the gym. And what could he say? He was a man of the people.

He wondered for a moment after posting if the two girls on the street may have had his Bubble. Maybe they had been STAYs. If they were, they didn’t say anything about it, but to be honest, he was thankful when he was seen as a normal person. He wondered what they’d think about the photo. If they’d realize that they’d been walking next to him earlier in the day. He wondered if the one girl would flip her hair over again, pining after what she saw.

He also wondered if maybe you had his Bubble. If maybe you were thinking about the photo too. He’d made sure to get his arms in there. Maybe you’d liked it? Maybe you’d- No, No. Not this again.

‘Focus on the other girls Chan. Or, I don’t know, anything else.’

He stood as he held tight to his water bottle, getting up to walk around. Maybe check on Changbin. Maybe take a picture with him before it was time to leave.

He would try anything to get you off his mind.

And he did. And lucky for him, it stayed that way.

——————————————————————

Saturday, 5:30 PM

Y/n’s POV:

You smoothed down some unruly flyaways as you did a once-over in the mirror.

“You’re sure you don’t want me to come home early tonight?” you yelled to Anna from your spot in the bathroom. A few sprays of perfume and you were feeling confident.

“No, please don’t. I want you to enjoy your exciting date night with your boyfriendddd,” Anna teased as you walked into the shared bedroom.

There were some last-minute preparations that Anna needed to do for the final week of the show. Being the leader meant you were definitely busier than the other members of the group.

“I promise I don’t mind. Plus, I feel bad leaving you to fend for yourself,” you frowned.

“I’ll knock this out in no time. I’d rather you go out and have fun, then come back to tell me every little detail. That sounds way more fun,” she grinned.

You shook your head with a smile. “Alright, but text me later if you change your mind… I’m just a little stressed that I have no clue where we’re going. Not that I mind, it’s just… I don’t know, I’d like to be dressed appropriately at least. But he literally won’t budge.”

“What you have on now is great,” Anna said, letting her head move down to examine your attire. “I’m sure he would have told you if he was going to do something crazy.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you said, beginning to plop down onto the bed. Your ass no sooner grazed the bedding when you heard a knock at the door.

You crossed your brows, automatically going to stand back up. “Jungkook’s early,” you said in a questioning tone.

“Have fun and be careful. Text me later please so I know when to expect you back, missy,” Anna said playfully as you began your move across the room.

Gathering your things, you set them on the table in front of the door before bending over to collect your shoes and slip them on.

Suddenly, another hard knock on the door.

“Here, hold on,” you got out. One shoe on with the other in hand, you swung the door open for Jungkook.

Except, well, it wasn’t Jungkook.

Expecting the silhouette of your broad, dark-headed boyfriend, you were surprised to see an older man standing in front of you, tall and lanky with a sideways smile.

“Hello,” the man flashed you a grin. “Miss Y/last/n?”

“Yes, this is she,” you responded, trying to sound chipper.

“Ahh, it’s nice to meet you,” he said, reaching his stiff hand out toward you.

Instinctively, you reached to meet his hand for a shake. “Nice to meet you too,” you said, trying to come across as pleasant when you were so utterly confused.

The man must have recognized the look on your face as he pressed on. “My name is Park Ha-Joon. You weren’t expecting me, were you?” he chuckled.

“Uhmm no, sorry,” you gave a shy smile back, not knowing why you’d just apologized.

“I should’ve expected it from Jungkook,” he shook his head. “I’m one of the stylists for his company. I came to drop off a few clothing items he requested.” He moved to the side slightly so that you could see the cart behind him stacked with boxes and hangers full of clothes that were hidden by their garment bags.

“Oh wow,” you said, a bit taken aback. “Thank you so much!” You honestly had no idea how to react.

“Yes, of course miss,” he said pleasantly as he began to grab the boxes and carry them inside. “Will the bed be fine to rest these on?”

“Of course!” you said, following behind him. “Please excuse the mess.”

“Oh, no worries,” he smiled. Entering the bedroom space, he smiled as his eyes met Anna. “You must be Miss Anna.” He lowered the boxes onto the adjacent bed. “Very nice to meet you as well,” he said, turning to extend a hand to her.

“Thank you, nice to meet you,” he nodded her head politely as she grabbed his hand in reciprocation.

The man didn’t speak much, just traveled back and forth between the cart in the hallway and the bedroom, carrying bag after bag and box after box.

Once he was done, you thanked him immensely… although you had no clue what was inside.

“Please feel free to wear whatever you’d like. We had someone get your measurements from JYP’s styling department, so hopefully everything will be fitted nicely,” he said warmly. “Miss Anna,” he turned his head, “Jungkook has insisted for you to keep some items as well if you’d like. I’ve included some pieces that I think are timeless.” He turned his head back and forth to look between the two of you. “I hope you both will find it to be satisfactory. Anything you do not wish to keep, please let the front desk know by the morning, and they will collect it for me to pick up.”

“Wow,” was all you could originally come up with. “Thank you. Really, thank you so much. I don’t even know what to say.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he gave you both a single nod. “You ladies have a wonderful night,” he said, reaching his hand out again to each of you, attesting to his goodbye.

“Thank you so much. You too,” Anna offered, smiling widely as her eyes were completely lit up.

“Thank you. Have a good night,” you said happily as you walked with the man back to the door, offering one final wave.

As you turned, Anna was standing, looking down at all of the covered treasure. “Oh my god-“ her voice raised up an octave, smile on her mouth in disbelief. “You better marry this man. If not for your sake, then for mine.”

———

Saturday, 7:15 PM

You rolled your eyes as Jungkook pushed the dessert plate your way. Even if you told him you didn’t want the last bite, he always made sure that you ate it. It’d become a sort of tradition between the two of you.

Taking your spoon to scoop up the last bite of the small tiramisu, you had to admit that it was one of the best things you’d ever eaten… And for the price, it had better be.

You knew that you’d be going somewhere fancy by the clothing options Jungkook had sent to you, but you could never entertain the level that you were now at. The interior was dimly lit with the most ornate chandeliers you’d ever seen, arches running up and down several of the walls. The floors were entirely marble, and the classically-trained pianist playing from a few yards away was impressive enough to rival an entire symphony.

As if you needed any further confirmation, when the pasta came out, it had been plated perfectly, adorned in garnishes that you’d never thought to pair. The small portion sizes only added to the pretense- although you couldn’t complain. This was all an overwhelming level of grandeur that you didn’t know if you’d ever get accustomed to.

But somehow, Jungkook made it seem so normal. So easy. If you’d have come in here alone, you probably wouldn’t have known what to do with yourself. Acting high-class wasn’t something you would ever imagine yourself doing, but in a place like this, you’d almost have been crazy not to… But in spite of it all, Jungkook was so unapologetically himself. He made you feel calm in an environment where you’d thought you’d feel totally disconnected from yourself. He just always knew… exactly what you needed.

You giggled as you finished the last of your wine, your head feeling lighter. You couldn’t help but to adore the way Junkook’s face shown in the warm lighting.

“Y/n, there’s actual something I wanted to talk to you about tonight,” he said, his face becoming serious.

“Oh yeah, of course. What’s going on?” you asked, trying to ground yourself in light of the conversation.

“I know we’ve already talked about you having to go home for a while, and… well I don’t want to overstep my boundaries, but I was wondering how you’d feel about possibly staying another week?” he asked sheepishly. “I know you have things to do for school and with friends, but… I just-,” his eyes looked off, trying to collect how he wanted to proceed. “I just know I’m going to really miss having you here with me. I haven’t been taking it for granted.”

A loving smile spread across your face. You contemplated, weighing back and forth in your head. “I would love to,” you said, wishing that that was the end of it. “But I just don’t think it’s a possibility for me right now. Especially with- well you know I’m not exactly financially stable right now with school. Especially if Anna leaves, I just don’t think I’ll be able to afford another week. And I really do have things I should be catching up on.”

“Sweetheart,” Jungkook said, taking your hands and looking at you almost in disbelief. “Do you really think I’d let you pay for another week?” He let out a slight chuckle. “You will never have to worry about money when you’re with me, okay? If money is the main issue, then that’s solved. You can stay with me… Or if you don’t feel comfortable with that yet, then let me at least get you a nice suite to stay in? If… if you want to, that is,” he smiled softly, taking a breath as he realized he was getting ahead of himself.

You wished you could say that you thought longer or harder about it, but the truth is that he made everything sound too easy- too perfect. And in actuality, maybe it was. “I meannnn-“ you smiled playfully, acting smug. “Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to put you out too badly,” you said with a squeeze, making sure to get him with your eyes shining innocently.

“I think I’ll manage,” he winked jokingly. “Plus, if you did want to stay with me, you technically wouldn’t be putting me out at all.” He grinned from ear to ear, happy with his plan.

Your head suddenly began to float again. “Take me home with you tonight, and I’ll make my decision then,” you challenged him.

———

Your clothes had been torn off, thrown somewhere unknown. You couldn’t see much from Jungkook’s shaggy hair falling onto your face, but god could you feel everything. It was as if every sense had been heightened. The way that Jungkook ran his hands up and down your bare body, outlining every curve. The way he grabbed at you, pressing harsh marks onto you that you so craved. As he kissed up and down your neck, your body reacted instinctively, beginning to buck your hips up into him to get any ounce of pressure, skin on skin daring to make your head spin. You felt your core begin to absolutely ache.

Jungkook chuckled lightly at the action, pulling his lips from you momentarily. “I was going to ask if you were sure, but I’m taking that as a yes?” he whispered, smiling lowly.

“Please,” you breathed out, not letting your hips slow. You had fully recovered your mind now and needed this more than you’d ever thought possible.

“How could I say no?” Jungkook asked delicately, planting a small, tender kiss to your forehead, then your nose.

You smiled as Jungkook pushed his upper body higher with his arms before trailing one hand down to where his cock was resting just over you. As he stroked himself a couple of times, he admired the feeling of the wetness already covering him from your movements. He let out a deep breath, almost as if he were trying to steady himself- tether himself to the ground and not fly away in the fantasy of it all.

You felt yourself instantly tense up as Jungkook slowly pushed himself inside of you. It had been too long, far too long, since you’d had anything like this. It was almost an entirely foreign sensation. But he went slowly. He was savoring it. He was making sure you felt comfortable. And as each inch went in, you started to relax more and more, feeling the stretch in the best possible way. You let out a deep sigh at the feeling of Jungkook bottoming out, his own sharp breath giving him away.

“You’re so fucking tight, baby,” Jungkook murmured into your hair. He slowly worked his way out again before repeating his same actions, letting himself sink in deeper until there was nothing left.

Suddenly, Jungkook’s arms found their way to wrap around your head, encasing you in an almost sort of hug. As he secured you in, he picked up the pace of his hips, letting them roll into you steadily now. You heard him begin to let out low grunts as he went, starting to feel more confident in his movement.

“Play with yourself, baby,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. And you had to admit, as good as he felt, you needed more stimulation than this.

You let your hand snake down your body, bringing it finally to your core where you were already getting overstimulated. You closed your eyes, pressing your face harder into Jungkook as you trailed your hand up and down your cunt. Slowly, you moved to your clit, which was throbbing underneath your touch. You gasped as you began to rub small circles, the sensation mixing with Jungkook’s thrusts becoming too much.

“That’s it baby, just like that. Keep going. We’ve both got to make sure you feel good,” he said, placing a lingering kiss to your cheek before snuggling his face back into you.

You picked up the pace as Jungkook’s hips snapped into you more quickly. Breathy moans continued to escape your lips as you heard Jungkook growl into your ear. Even if it was your first time with him, you knew he was close.

The tingling in your core was quickly becoming too much as you ravaged at your clit, working yourself up now to your high. You couldn’t stop the light screams you let out as you felt yourself let go and convulse around Jungkook’s dick. His deep moans fell into your ears at the feeling of you clenching so hard around him. Your mind was numb. No thoughts other than focusing on the feeling that you quickly had to remove your hand from. It was all too much.

“Oh fuck,” he cried out. “Fuck fuck fuck, too good,” he moaned lowly. A couple more quick thrusts and he was panting.

“Oh fuck I’m cumming,” Jungkook yelled, quickly pulling himself out of you while untangling his arms from underneath you. As he leaned his body back, his hands flew automatically to his cock, pumping furiously as cum began to shoot out onto your stomach. Curses flew out of his mouth as his brows furrowed, look of release evident on his face.

Content that he was done, Jungkook remained on his knees above you for a moment, taking a few deep breaths before a smile spread over his face. He gave a little giggle, looking down at you now suddenly shy for him. “That was even better than I could have imagined,” he laughed. He leaned down slowly to plant another soft kiss to your cheek. “Let me get you cleaned up.”

—————————————————————

Wednesday, 5:00 PM

Y/n’s POV:

You watched in horror at the scene unfolding in front of you. Another group that had formed for Everyday Idol was performing their dress rehearsal on the stage in front of you. For some reason, the company thought it would be a good idea for all 4 groups to sit in and watch each other, along with the staff. But with the messy choreography, pitchy vocals, and failed stunt you’d just seen, you wished you could just go home and not be subject to any of this.

Your group had already performed and everything went off without a hitch, thankfully. Jenna was still a bit pitchy, but had improved significantly- which was both a blessing and a curse. While good news for the team, it also meant that the other groups were now eyeing each of you up and down, seeing you as a threat that they needed to conquer. But it wasn’t your fault that your team had… talent? With the competition only two days away, everything should have been perfect by now. It wasn’t like you hadn’t been practicing for weeks.

You looked down from your seat as the team received feedback on their performance. Even if you weren’t entirely prone to second-hand embarrassment, this was too much. Thankful that you hadn’t received the same harsh words, you’d still wanted all of the groups to perform well.

Once each of the groups had performed and everyone was dismissed, Anna stood to address the group. “Girls,” she began, looking at each of them. “I think we’ve all done really well today, and I’m so pleased with how everyone did. If you want to go home, then you can, but we are going to start bright and early at 7 o’clock tomorrow morning. Y/n and I will be here tonight for anyone who wants to stay and practice. Sound good?” she stated more than asked. Nods flowed in from the seated row of girls.

“Don’t you think 7 is a bit early?” Jenna asked, voice full of gumption.

Anna, although annoyed, looked down at her with a smile. “Hmm, if you stay tonight til around 2 practicing your lines, then maybe 7 is a bit early. Your call,” Anna challenged.

Jenna just stared up at her, apparent embarrassment on her face. She had nothing to say.

“Alright, well if that’s everything, like I said, I’ll be upstairs for whoever else would like to go. I’ll see the rest of you in the practice room at 7,” Anna nodded.

One by one the girls stood, collecting their belongings before heading out. Within a couple of minutes, it was only you and Anna remaining, with Kara, Sunnie, Mindi, and Nisha promising to be back after a short break to grab food.

As the two of you stood together, you both smirked at each other with raised eyebrows before letting out a small laugh.

“Jenna is on one,” you laughed. “You handled that way better than I would’ve,” you said, shaking your head in disbelief.

Anna took a deep breath in and out. “All I can say is if she doesn’t do well on Friday, I tried my best.”

——————————————————————

Thursday, 3 PM

Y/n’s POV:

High stress mode had kicked in since the early hours. Anna was about to rip her hair out when not only did Jenna not come in to practice last night, but she also didn’t arrive until 8:30 this morning, putting the entire group behind. This prompted an entire argument, resulting in Anna threatening to talk with someone about kicking Jenna out of the group for not taking this seriously.

“You’ve come this fucking far and now you want to mess it up… For everyone?” Anna had yelled at her. Much nicer words than you could have conjured up.

Since the incident, everyone had been high strung all day. Small mistakes were happening here and there- mistakes that hadn’t been made for over a week. And although you knew you could pull through, it was stressing you out to no end. You’d had about all you could take. And now, at what was supposed to be your final all-out dance practice with your mentors, it was no exception.

Watching the girls with such low energy drained you. As you all congregated in different areas, taking a water break, you sighed to Anna. “I swear you are the only thing getting me through this day.”

“Trust me, I feel the same way,” she let out a tired, deep breath, looking over at Jenna. She pulled her head around her neck, trying to work out any little bit of stress that she could. As her head came back to center, she continued. “But I’m not the onlyyy thing,” she grinned, poking at you. “Are you gonna see Jungkook tonight?”

“No, not tonight,” you rolled your eyes. “There’s too much going on. I think I’ll puke if I have to add anything else to my list. I can barely handle all this stress.”

Anna tilted her head to the side with a devilish smile. “Oh really? From the way you talked about the other night, I’m sure Jungkook knows how to take care of some of that stress.”

“Anna!” you exclaimed, mouth dropping open to make sure she was being quiet enough for no one to overhear her.

Standing only a few feet away, you saw a hunched-over Chan who’d been leaning over onto the mirrored wall next to him, his back turned to you. While you were almost certain he hadn’t heard the conversation, you still wanted to keep it low. Whatever was going on with Chan, he seemed like he’d completely forgotten about you. You didn’t want to bring in any mention of his friend and have him remember that he for some reason despised you.

You quickly turned back to your friend. “Not here,” you whispered.

Anna just chuckled, giving you another big smirk before bringing her water bottle to her mouth.

—————————————————————

Thursday, 7 PM

Y/n’s POV:

You were panting heavily as you finished yet another full-out practice of your performance tomorrow. The sweat running down your forehead was a testament to how hard you’d been going for hours now. And you were sure it had paid off. You were finally confident in your team’s performance. It felt like everyone was, at long last, in higher spirits with everything coming together- last minute nerves being settled as everything fell into place. Well… for all except one.

Chan had taken it upon himself to critique quite literally every single element of the performance for the past several hours. Originally, you had told yourself that it was simply because he was a perfectionist. He knew how harsh JYP and the other judges could be, and he didn’t want your group to suffer the same fate. However, this grace could only be given during the first couple of hours of his rampage. Now… now he was just being ridiculous.

Chan’s voice revved up as you all remained in your final pose, waiting for your mentors’ feedback. “Start from the top. Go again,” he demanded, face looking stern.

The members around him glared at him, confused, but almost too stunned to speak. This was the fifth time he’d done this. The other members had no feedback other than saying you were farrrrr past ready and would do well tomorrow.

What was with him?

You and your members tried your best to catch your breath as you walked back to your starting formation, deep sighs erupting from the girls as Chan continued with his charades.

His voice was raised now. “Mindi, you’ve got to get into position quicker. And y/n, how many times do I have to tell you that you’ve got to go harder? If you don’t, you’re going to have to scrap this and start over.”

“Start over?” you burst out in disbelief, almost letting a sarcastic laugh accompany it.

Something in Chan definitely did not like the tone in your voice. He took a step closer, standing his ground. “You heard me.”

“We can’t just start over.” You were astonished. "The performance is literally tomorrow!"

"Well maybe if you weren't out every night and were actually in here practicing, we wouldn't be having this problem," he spat.

Your jaw dropped. you were here just as much, if not more, than any of the other girls.… The only difference was that when you were off, you spent your time with Jungkook… and now you guessed that Chan knew that. You didn't know what to do, but starting a scene definitely wasn't the right thing. You let your head drop down past your shoulders, letting out an exasperated sigh, though you knew you couldn’t let this be the thing that got to you. Almost quicker than before, you snapped back up, ready to begin again after taking a big breath.

Minho finally interjected, moving himself so that he stood next to Chan. "What is your problem? I couldn’t perform it any better. She's been working so hard with me to make everything perfect. Just calm down."

“Come on Min, you’ve got to be kidding me,” Chan turned to face him. “If that’s the best that you could perform, maybe you need to go practice too, uh?” Chan questioned, look of disgust on his face.

Minho squinted his eyes, almost as if searching his face to find something. Whatever it was, he couldn’t locate it. “Just because you’re having a bad day doesn’t mean you should take it out on them.”

“I’m not having a bad day,” Chan retorted, his voice the tiniest bit shaky. “I just want what’s best for them. If they can’t handle that, then they can go join someone else’s group.”

“It’s not your group,” Changbin spoke up, stepping up in front of Minho and almost in Chan’s face now. His look was stern, eyebrows knit together. “This is their group, which is doing way better than we were at our debut.” Changbin crossed his arms.

“That’s a pretty wild statement,” Chan snickered, looking toward his shoulder.

“Seriously?” Changbin asked, face a mixture of anger and disappointment.

Chan didn’t back down from his stare, challenging him to continue on. But he did.

“You need to go cool off because you’re really making yourself look like an ass right now.”

“Ahh, okay,” Chan sneered. “Sorry if people can’t take criticism. And if that makes me an ass, then that makes me an ass,” he said sarcastically, throwing his hands out to the side before turning to walk toward the door. “Good luck tomorrow,” he said loudly as he passed by everyone toward the exit.

Once the door closed, the rest of you in the room looked around in disbelief for a few moments. No one knew what words to say.

“I guess he’s sensitive today,” Changbin finally said in a quietened tone.

The girls of the group just shook their heads, blinking their eyes wide and letting out breaths that had obviously been held in during the “scolding that was not a scolding.”

“How about,” Minho started, “we run through- full out- a few more times, and then we call it a day? Sound good?” He looked toward your members.

Still not able to come up with the right words, you nodded in unison, thankful to have the awkward situation over with.

Though you were thankful for Minho’s handling of the situation, beneath your skin, you could still feel your blood boiling. Just more confirmation that Jungkook had been right about him all along. How could you have been so blind to that before? It was as if he’d fooled you into thinking he was someone else, and that’s what hurt the most. To actually form a bond with someone, only to see their true colors. Your face was heated as you settled into position. As badly as you wanted to, you just couldn’t let this go.

All you wanted was to get out of here and call your boyfriend.

——————

Thursday, 8:30 PM

Y/n’s POV:

After consulting Anna briefly, you tried your best to calm yourself before knocking on Chan’s studio door. As badly as you wanted to confront him and resolve whatever was going on with him, you told yourself that if he wasn’t there, that was your sign to leave it alone.

After waiting a few seconds, you knocked again, just to be sure. Again, crickets. Crossing your arms over your chest, you realized that no one was coming to answer the door. You let out a small huff, getting your answer as to what you should do.

But as you headily spun on your heels to walk away, you heard the door creak open behind you.

Snapping your head around to look past it, you could see Chan peaking his head out, looking around before spotting you. “Hey,” he said mildly, as if this was the last thing he wanted to be doing.

“Hey,” you turned back around just as quickly as you had before. You tried to keep your voice as calm as possible. “Can I talk to you?”

Chan poked his cheek with his tongue, breaking eye contact with you to look left and right down the hall, scoping out the scene to see if anyone was around. After looking off for a bit, he let out a slight sigh. “Sure,” he responded, mirroring your emotionless voice as he opened the door wider for you to come in.

As you entered the room, it was colder than before. Colder than you’d remembered. But then again, it’d been quite some time since you’d last set foot in here. Everything was truly the same… except for the missing bouquet of flowers that had been on the desk last. The same bouquet of flowers that subsequently were in Jenna’s hands during that first day of filming. The image of them sitting on the table, still and lifeless, yet drawing attention nonetheless, plagued your memory.

Had it really been that long since you’d been here? Weeks since you’d sat in this room? Regardless of the situation, the room offered a sense of comfort and familiarity that made it seem like you were here just yesterday, babbling with Chan about anything and everything. Both to your hearts’ content. Wild how much everything had changed.

You seated yourself in your… previously usual spot on the couch as you watched Chan sink back into his desk chair, presumably where he had already been stationed with his computer lit up behind him. A mostly blank screen, so you guessed he hadn’t gotten much done.

Something about seeing him like this- in the context of how things used to be- lit a fire inside you. Not in a good way. In more of a “how could you have been two totally different people this whole time” way. Slowly, your face moved to match the emotion you felt inside. You tried to reign it in, but you couldn’t help it.

“What’s up?” he asked, trying to sound nonchalant. It almost made you roll your eyes. As if he had the right.

“I’d like to talk about earlier. I’m going to be honest, it seemed completely uncalled for. I understand you wanting to be helpful and give feedback, but I don’t think that yelling at us like we’re children does any good… I guess I would just appreciate it if you could lay off for a little bit. Please,” you stated. All things considered, you thought your response was relatively mature, or, as mature as you could be in the moment.

Chan sunk down further into his chair, his arms and legs splayed out, almost intimidating. He looked like he was lost in thought for a moment before a tiny chuckle left his mouth as he moved his head back and forth.

“You’re right, I was trying to help. If you think that was bad of me, you don’t even want to know what it was like when I was a trainee.”

And just like that, you realized that this conversation was going to go nowhere. Chan didn’t seem like he was one to see reason right now. Just because he had experienced the harshness of the company doesn’t mean that it was just for him to do the same to you.

You quickly stood from your chair, upset but not surprised at the outcome of the conversation. You walked toward the door, obviously annoyed. What was the point?

“That’s it? That’s all you had to say?” Chan asked from behind you just as you were holding the knob to the door.

You took a moment to compose yourself before turning around. “Listen Chris,” you made sure to use his usual English name. “I mean this with the utmost respect, but you’re not even your group’s main dancer... Minho liked it. And so did the other guys. Why are you trying to change everything now?”

He paused for a moment, looking for something to say. You were sure the comment about not being the dancer of his group took him aback. Should you have said it? Maybe not. But might as well if you were going to get everything off your chest.

As Chan sat, continuing to say nothing, the heat from your stomach only rose more. He just looked at you. That was it. No response, no anything. A total lack of humility, eyeing you up and down as if to challenge your very being. Totally and completely degrading.

“Do you really think I’m that bad? Honestly?” you asked loudly, now angry and not letting yourself hold back.

“No,” he replied, face remaining still. And that drove you over the edge.

“Then why do you act like it?! I’ve never done anything to you! You don’t need to spare my feelings, just tell me why you hate me so much?!” you yelled. You figured the walls were soundproof, but you honestly didn’t care who heard.

“I don’t hate you!” Chan said back, almost yelling himself as he stood out of his chair to stand in front of you. “I don’t hate you at all. Don’t fucking say that,” he spoke loudly through gritted teeth.

“Could’ve fooled me,” you said sarcastically, not feeling threatened in the slightest. A laugh almost escaped your mouth at how ridiculous it was. “First, you ignore me, then you insinuate that I’m a whore, and then you’re back to ignoring me. Yet you don’t hate me?!” you scoffed.

“No. I don’t. And I never insinuated that you were a whore. Now please, just stop. I don’t want to do this right now.” His face was red with anger, standing his ground a little to close for comfort.

“Whatever,” you snorted, backing up slightly. “It’s not like you’d be honest about anything anyways. My bad for not realizing it sooner!” you said, voice full of disbelief. You turned your body slightly, ready to pull for the door one again.

“Do you want to know how I feel about you?! Do you truly want to know?!” he strained, jaw clenched as he inched toward you. His voice was borderline on rage now.

You backed against the door as you felt his body move closer, nervous at his sudden change in demeanor. His eyes were black. Mean. Nothing like you’d ever seen them before. You almost winced as he continued loudly.

“I don’t hate you, no… But I wish I never had to fucking see you again. I can’t stand to be around you. I can’t stand to even think about you, do you know that?! Do you know how exhausting it is to try and think about anything but you?! And yet, I have to see you every goddamn day of my life?!” he almost laughed out in frustration. “So no, I do not, in fact, hate you. I am fucking crazy about you, to the point that it is driving me insane. And there’s not a thing in this entire fucking world that I can do about it! So sorry if I’ve ignored you or made you feel whatever type of way, but what else was I supposed to do?! Go on pretending that I don’t want to rip my heart out of my fucking chest every time I see you?! So, you tell me, what should I have done differently?! What would you have done?!”

Your heart stopped. Your mind went blank. Not a single thought could come to you, lost in a daze as the room suddenly looked like it was whooshing around you. You wished more than anything that your brain could turn on- to come up with anything, but it couldn’t.

Chan had pushed himself up right in front of you now, his face only inches from your own. Your mouth stayed silent- mute- as you lost your breath. Without a response from you, he gently closed his eyes, beginning to nod. Maybe he too wasn’t expecting this. Maybe he too didn’t know where to go from here.

But slowly, he opened his eyes wide again. They were much softer now, but still as intense as ever, looking as if he was studying every imperfection on your face.

You tried to push yourself into the door as he moved his face even closer, his hands coming up to hold the door on either side of you, effectively caging you in his stance.

He took a deep breath before starting again, with his voice still filled with that exasperated tone. His eyes moved just so they were aligned with yours, clinging onto them with everything that he had.

“Tell me you don’t feel anything between us,” he breathed out, watching your every expression. “Tell me you didn’t feel anything before all of this shit got in the way. Tell me that you felt nothing and I will leave you alone.” Desperation seeped from his voice.

You felt a hitch in your throat. As if things could have gotten any more extreme. Now, you didn’t even know how to breathe. Your lips spread apart slightly, signaling to him the shock that had overcome you. He didn’t know whether it was good or bad.

“Chris, I…” you started, trying to reclaim your voice. You looked down to the floor. Anywhere but at him. You cleared your throat. “Chris, I’m seeing someone.”

“I know. Jungkook,” he said back, hatred in his voice as he brought his face down to once again try to level with you. “But how well do you really know him, y/n? Tell me how well you could possibly know him in… what? A month? Maybe two?”

“I know him well enough, Christopher. He’s my fucking boyfriend,” you snapped back.

At that, Chris removed his hands from the door behind you, gingerly pushing himself up and away. An agitated smile spread over his face, his tongue running across his teeth and into his cheek as he swayed backwards and around. His hands turned into loose fists, clicking each other as he looked up in disbelief. In annoyance. He shook his head. A stupid grin came over his face as if not knowing what to say.

“He’s your 'boyfriend' now, huh?” he says, finally coming back to settle closer to you.

“Yes…” you responded a bit shyly, not knowing what could come next.

“In that case, since you know your 'boyfriend' so fucking well, you know he’s going out with another girl too, ahh? With Jenna?”

Your eyebrows squeezed together. “With Jenna? What the fuck are you talking about? She only says that shit because she’s jealous or something. I don’t really know, nor do I care since she’s left me alone about it. She has someone anyways…” you trailed off for a moment, thoroughly confused. “But uhh…you- didn’t you have something with her?” you almost laughed, remembering the short time frame you’d seen him talking with her. The flowers. The way he leaned into her. It was almost comical he’d bring her up now.

“What? I- no, I-” Chan said, beginning to stumble over his words. “It wasn’t like that. We talked about this.”

“Yeah, we did. Before she’d strutted into the first day of filming with a bouquet of flowers. Not trying to be weird, but I saw a packet of flower food on your desk a couple of days before. Kind of a weird coincidence if you ask me… It’s fine if you had a thing with her, just don’t fucking lie about it.”

“No, y/n. I never had a thing with her. I gave those flowers to Jungkook, goddamn it. Not her. So how else would they have ended up with her if he didn’t give them to her? That night at Nine Mile. There’s no way in hell he was there ‘stalking you’ that night. He was meeting up with her.”

Your face dropped. There was no way. There was absolutely no way. He’d been going out with you. Publicly. Surely it’s not true. She wouldn’t be okay with that.

“No, there’s something else going on then. She talks about seeing someone else nonstop. Jungkook was meeting up with his friend that night! He showed me the texts! His timeline matched up and everything.”

“And you’re sure it was just a ‘friend?’” Chan raised a brow. “Who was this friend exactly, maybe I would know them?”

“I don’t know- I mean, he said his name was-” your mind flashed back to the screen. The conversation you’d seen before. J.T. “He said his name was J.T., but I didn’t ask anything more than that. It’s not like I-” you got out before Chan cut you off.

“J.T.?” he laughed. “J.T.? Come on, y/n, think about it.”

Your mind wandered. ‘J.T.? What was wrong with that? J.T… Jenna?’ You felt your heart sink.

“Jenna Thomas?” Chan stated more than asked, watching your face drop. 

Again, you were lost for words. There had to be another explanation.

“I introduced them. Before filming started…” Chan began again, talking much quieter now. “And before he met you. I… well I thought they’d had a thing before and that just kind of proved it. And I’ve just, I’ve kept hearing things. I’m so sorry,” Chan’s voice cut out, realizing the load of information he’d just dropped on you.

Again, you couldn’t say anything. With a heavy heart, you looked off, trying to put all of the pieces together. With your voice now silent, Chan started rambling, trying to say anything that came to mind. Anything that could provide a small ounce of comfort.

“I hoped that maybe you knew. Maybe it was in the past, and he told you. Obviously I didn’t think he did, but… But I thought maybe… For your sake... That’s why I’ve been so weird, and I’m just… I’m so so sorry. I didn’t want things to have to be like this. You deserve so much more. You deserve so much more than him.”

You felt a tear run down your cheek. Almost numb, but the feeling of the coolness slowly creeping its way down was unmistakable.You didn’t mean to cry. In fact, this was the last thing you’d wanted. But you just couldn’t help it. Your life suddenly felt like it was on fire- that it had been on fire this whole time without you feeling so much as a flicker. You couldn’t have a good friend in Chan. You couldn’t have a boyfriend in Jungkook. Your whole life in Korea had been a lie. You’d become so invested in that lie that you’d let it become the defining story of your time in Korea… over Everyday Idol, over all of the amazing friends that you’d made, over all of the experiences that people had given to you, over everything. You’d put a boy before all of that. A boy who had done nothing but lie while contributing it to the others around you. You felt so stupid. You felt so naive.You suddenly felt so alone. And so, the tears continued to fall.

“Y/n, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, please don’t cry,” Chan started back. He reached an arm out, gently now, to place it on your arm, as if testing how much he could get away with. When you didn’t flinch, no hint of hesitation to be found, he let himself rub up and down your arm for a few moments before bringing his body closer, wrapping you into a hug.

And so you stood, for what felt like days, grounded in the stillness of Chan’s arms. He held you tightly, trying to softly rock you as your entire body felt like it would give in. Your legs felt flimsy, and you were sure that without Chan to hold you upright, you’d have already given in to the gravity and made your way to the ground. The slightly salty smell of tears became apparent across Chan’s chest, who didn’t seem to mind in the slightest.

“Shh, shh,” he whispered, rubbing your back lightly. “It’s okay.”

His words only made you want to sob more. You tried to quieten them, and managed to stifle a few short breaths before almost choking entirely. You felt yourself start to hiccup before slow, rolling streams continued down, not as forceful now. You tried taking big, deep breaths as you clung onto Chan as tightly as you could.

“He's not worth it, I promise,” Chan said quietly. “He’s not worth you feeling like this.” He continued to gently rock you.

In the lull of his heartbeat and in the comfort of his words, you started to calm. Slowly. But seconds turned into minutes, and minutes turned into a sort of new clarity. You contemplated what Chan said. He was right. Jungkook was not worth it. He was not worth the tears. He was not worth any reaction that your overstimulated brain could conjure up. In the wake of it, you realized you didn’t even know him. He was simply a fraud. An imposter. An exploiter. You fell in love with the thought of him, not the reality of him. And although it didn’t lessen the harshness of reality, it did alleviate some of the gnawingly painful sensitivity you felt inside.

Your heart calmed and your tears stopped. After a few sniffles, you hesitantly pulled back from Chan’s embrace which had sheltered you for so long. Feeling the cold air come between you two, you suddenly felt exposed. You knew your eyes were puffy and red, makeup surely smeared all over your face. You looked down, not sure how you’d be able to make eye contact.

“You okay?” Chan offered a warm grin, gripping your hand to give it a tight squeeze.

You nodded before clearing your throat. “I think so,” you tried to return the tiny, timid smile.

“Atta girl,” he smiled before taking your other hand too, shaking them around to try to get a genuine smile out of you.

It worked. Before long, you were laughing a bit, giggling at his ability to lighten the mood. You shook your head, finally able to look up to his face. “Thank you Channie.”

You watched as his eyes softened. It was like they had a million stars in them, all fixated on you. The most kind eyes you’d ever seen. He held your hands tighter, interlacing his fingers with yours. “You don’t need to thank me,” he smiled.

But you did. And you needed to do much more.

“I do though,” you said, just noticing your hands in his. The way he held them out, positioned like that was where they were meant to be all along. The sight took you off guard for a moment.

“And I also needed to say I’m sorry…” you continued. “For making you feel that way. I didn’t know.”

“Oh, uhm,” Chan said, now with an embarrassed smile on his face, as he removed his hands from yours. He reached one hand around to rub the back of his neck as he looked down, trying to do an awkward laugh to diffuse the situation. “No it’s…” he shook his head a little before looking up. “It’s really okay. It wasn’t your fault. It was my own emotions that I was projecting onto you. You didn’t- you didn’t do anything.”

He looked shy now. No, more than shy. He looked like he wanted to burrow into a hole and hide himself away from you. You knew what he was thinking. Please stop. Please just leave it. But you couldn’t. Not with the way he’d just made you feel. Not with the knowledge you now had. Forget Jungkook. Forget whatever lies he’d been spouting to you. Chan may have come across like an asshole, but at least he wasn’t lying about the way he felt. He was truthful. He’d always been truthful. You just wished you would have been able to realize the difference sooner.

“But I did do something,” you started, taking a deep breath. Your body started to move independently of your mind. You couldn’t formulate thoughts. You couldn’t form an action plan. Now, your body just did, and you didn’t ask questions.

You reached again for Chan’s hand, but couldn’t bring yourself to hold onto it. Instead, you just brushed against it, letting him know you were there. “I messed up with you for someone I didn’t even truly know. I jumped to assumptions without even hearing you out. And I will always regret that.” You looked at him, eyes wide, silently begging for forgiveness. You hoped he knew that.

Chan looked past your shoulder for a moment, collecting his thoughts. “Well don’t. I will never regret feeling the way that I have. It will be okay, and we can both move on from all of this. Right now, we just… I just want you to feel better,” he said, letting out a deep breath.

“I want that too,” you said shyly.

You stood in silence for a few moments, neither of you daring to look at each other- neither of you knowing what to say next. Sitting with only your thoughts, it was hard to not become restless. You wanted him to say something, anything, but he wasn’t budging. Just looking off, embarrassed at the situation he’d found himself in. You couldn’t deny how cute he looked, his ears a soft shade of pink. His cheeks had turned a new rosy color you’d never seen before. Maybe, just maybe, he wanted this too.

“Kiss me,” you blurted out. Your mouth was faster than your mind, pushing through whatever invisible wall had been built between you and the truth.

Chan’s eyes sprang wide, turning his face to yours. “What?” he asked, a smile trying to creep across his face, but still convinced he’d misheard you.

“Kiss. Me,” you breathed out. “Please.”

You didn’t have time to gauge his reaction as as swiftly as the words left your mouth, he was hastily propelling himself forward, wasting no time in processing your words.

Hurriedly, his hands found their way to the sides of your face, followed by his lips crashing in to connect with yours. His lips were soft as they mingled with the saltiness still overlying your own. He moved them feverishly, rushing through any apprehension that could have possibly stood in the way.

You let out a deep sigh, feeling the way that his body moved in to press up against yours, effectively pushing you against the door again as he guided your head in the direction he wanted you. His chest, toned and forcing its way into you, was heaving heavily as he did all he could to not have to disconnect his lips from yours.

His mouth opened, his tongue escaping his mouth to find yours. You fervently slipped your lips apart, making just enough room to feel him work his tongue along the inside of your lips, stopping only when he ran into your teeth. You gladly dropped your jaw open to allow him full access, moaning when you felt him move deeper inside.

You felt yourself running out of breath as you took turns entangling your tongues into each other. But you didn’t want to stop. You didn’t dare to take away one moment from this experience.

You grabbed gently to Chan’s chest and to the side of his neck, pulling him as close as possible as you gasped for air. He followed suit, allowing his hands to run up and down your silhouette. The sensation of his warm, strong hands gently massaging at your sides was enough to fulfill your desires for the rest of your life. Experiencing him like this, grappling at you, exposed you to something so carnal in him that you knew you’d never be able to forget.

As you both continued to explore each other, you audibly gasped as Chan’s hands made their way to firmly grip your ass. He pulled his mouth back quickly. “Is this okay?” he whispered. You could tell he was still in a half-daze.

“Mm-mm,” you smiled before bringing your mouth back to his. Slowly, you let your hand run along his chest as he continued to squeeze on you. Short moans left his mouth as your hand ran down further, feeling each mound of his abs along the way. He was so tight, his torso contracting with each breath as they became more and more sharp.

When you finally made your way down to the line of his waistband, he moaned heavily, almost bucking his hips up to deepen your touch. He blew out a hot, shaky breath into your mouth, trying his absolute best to not let his mind transcend and escape the confines of his body.

Little did he know that you were doing the same. The closer you got to him, the harder he pulled you in. Without realizing it, you could feel his bulge harden against you. Although you were both fully clothed, there was no mistaking the stiffness that was pressed up against your core. As he continually pressed himself into you, it became more and more apparent to the point that you were growing wet just thinking about it.

You were going wild over this man. Your entire being felt healed in this moment. And just when you thought you couldn’t feel any more connected, you felt Chan detach his mouth from yours to run it down along your jawline and to the side of your neck. He planted soft kisses originally, but as the madness of you continuing to play with his waist band drove him insane, he started to bite down ever so slightly. He knew better than to leave a mark, but it took all of the restraint he had to stop himself from completely demolishing you.

At the feeling of him lightly gnawing, you whimpered, finally letting your hand snake down further as you pushed your chest into him. You felt the wetness at your core start to pool. You knew you weren’t going to make it much longer by the heaviness you felt at your pussy throbbing.

“Chris…” you exhaled, dragging a single finger across the outline of his cock, earning a hiss from him in response.

“Chris, please,” you continued, letting yourself mumble out anything that came to mind. You needed him. Now. And you knew he needed you too.

“Yes, baby?” he said lowly, pulling off of you with the tiniest smirk. His eyes looked you up and down, taking in this moment and how good he felt. He could feel himself salivating, wandering eyes going down to your hand that was now resting on his cock.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, throwing his head back and smiling to himself. This was his life. And he couldn’t believe it. His hips reflexively bucked up into you.

Suddenly, your mind came to as you felt a gyration behind you along with a loud knocking sound. ‘Shit,’ you thought, your stomach dropping.

Chan’s head sprang back up. “Fuck,” he huffed out, now in frustration. His face went angry as he rolled his eyes. Tongue in his cheek, he shook his head back and forth before backing away from you.

“Chan-hyung, we’re getting dinner!” you heard Felix’s voice shout through the wooden barrier. Quickly the door flung open, knocking you over in the process. “What do you wan-” Felix stopped himself as he felt the weight of your body contact the door.

“Oh my God, y/n, I’m so sorry! Are you okay?"

——————————————————

i SO appreciate everyone being patient with me during this series. i have been so busy these days and haven't had time to just sit down and WRITE (i have to have long spans of time all at once to work on fics like this sadly), so thank you x a million for bearing with me.

i've mentioned this before, but the rest of the series is mapped out, and it starts to get INTENSE. i will put some trigger warnings at the beginning of the next few chapters without trying to give away too much. PLEASE make sure to read the warnings before continuing on!!! <3

Tag list : @lailac13 @freyjhasdesiredreality @shellyyy177 @enzos-shit @laylasbunbunny @11thenightwemet11 @stayceebs97 @greyyeti @de-uns-tempos-pra-ca

[makur0]

Melting Innocence, Rouge Heat, Tainted Soul

synopsis — if putting on an alluring performance wasn't enough for the two members of Adam, you certainly will fulfill their desires on Valentines Day. [nagisa ran x fem! reader x ibara saegusa]

content warnings — nsfw, mdni. sub! reader, hard dom! ibara, dom! nagisa, semi-exhibitionism, dirty talk, penetration, creampie, oral, cursing, stomach bulge, breeding, slightly rushed end

author's note — part one of valentine's fest! god i want to be sandwiched between these two it isn't funny. (and surprisingly... writing to character AI's really helps my burnt out era)

word count — 2347

"HON, AREN'T YOU GOING TO SEE ADAM'S PERFORMANCE?"

Anzu turns to you, her head tilted. You finally look up from your paperwork, blinking. "...huh?"

The lead producer sighs, reaching over to close your computer. "[name], Adam? The sub-unit you produce for? Nagisa and Ibara?"

You seem dazed, not processing her words before finally jolting. "A-ah, yes! Their Valentine's Day-themed live, right? Yes, I'll be there... I think..."

You sigh, running your fingers through your hair. "I don't know, Anzu. I have too much work to even take half an hour out of my time... but then again, I was the head of this project, I should at least enjoy it..." You look so conflicted with yourself, Anzu sighs.

"Darling, [name]," The brunette tuts, bringing you up to your feet. "Go, I got the rest."

"But-"

"Shut- no. That's an order," She says sternly, and you finally yield, nodding. At this Anzu looks pleased that she finally convinced you to take a much-needed break. "Good... now, go before they start."

You quickly run out of the office, and as you leave Anzu alone, she smiles to herself slightly.

Besides... Nagisa and Ibara would be extremely dissapointed that their 'main audience' won't even be there...

---

You quickly make it to the Producer's section of the auditorium, meeting many other of your co-workers who are excitedly waiting for the performance. Unlike you, they came solely to... ah, simp for the two members of the popular unit Eden, Nagisa Ran and Ibara Saegusa. You didn't even recognize half of them from the project, which you sigh at. You laugh at yourself- the head of the project showing the least 'interest'...?

You take your seat away from the horny group, making yourself comfortable. Minutes before the Live starts, your phone buzzes: it's Ibara.

Ibara: Are you here? I would be gravely disappointed if you weren't.

You sigh through your nose, texting back a short, 'Yes' before shutting your phone down. Ibara should know better than to text you right before his own performance.

Finally, the lights turn off, and the stage lights up. You can't help but swell in pride of how intricate the stage is, thanks to your designing. As the two members of Adam had requested, you tied it along with their song as well as you could... as well as some suggestions that were strangely what you like...

You had decided not to look into it deeply, instead following Adam's requests.

As Ibara and Nagisa descend, somehow they quickly find you in the crowd, both sending you an unreadable look as they start the performance...

Your breath was caught in your throat.

You had no idea how... uh. Hot their vocals and choreography was.

As the head of the project, you were surprisingly only in charge of the setup of the stage and the light coordination. Then again, Ibara had requested that you pull your full attention on that...

You felt yourself heating up at the lyrics, mesmerized by their movements. If you were in a more attentive mindset, you would have noticed that they were constantly stealing glances towards you. But, paired with overall tiredness, your flustered state did not help at all.

You started to overthink as the Live carried on. They have been sending me mixed signals... No, how could they possibly fancy me? Both of them? I'm just their producer, nothing else...

So why do I feel so uncomfortably hot?

It felt like an eternity, but Adam was finally done with their performance. To say the least, you were proud of yet another successful performance, but so many other emotions were mixed into the mess... confusion, flattery, embarrassment...

Not long after Adam left the stage you feel your phone buzz again.

Ibara: Come meet us at our dressing room.

You can't- don't think much of it as you rush off before the other producers could disgust you of their horny talk, walking through the cold halls as you find Adam's dressing room. You frown, as the door stands ajar and the room is dark inside.

Funny... maybe they got another dressing room? Or did they just leave earlier?

You walk into the dressing room, completely unaware of what was about to happen...

The door shuts as your vision is obscured by the darkness of the room, and you even hear the door lock click as you feel arms wrap around you tightly. "H-hey-!?"

"Shh." It's Nagisa. "...It's just us."

A groan from another man, Ibara you realize, interrupts Nagisa. "Your Highness, I thought we agreed to keep our identities a secret as a special touch."

"...My bad."

With the little light in the room, you see Ibara's glasses reflected in it. Otherwise, he was completely invisible in the darkness. "Dear Producer, what did you think of our performance...?"

You hear his footsteps walk up towards you, and his pair of arms hook under your own and lift you up. Nagisa's body acts as a chair for you as you feel hot breath on both your neck and face... feeling yourself heat up, you completely disregard the previous question thrown at you.

Ibara tsks at your lack of response. "Hm. It looks like the cat has already got her tongue, Your Highness..."

"...I was hoping to be the first one to get her tongue."

"W-what on earth is going on?" You finally manage to get out, squirming although Nagisa's hold around you is strong, tight. "Ibara-san, Nagisa-san, is that you?"

Ibara chuckles. "Indeed it is, dear producer! I am quite glad that you had decided to attend our Live, as my plan would be in complete shambles if you haven't..."

"Plan-?"

Nagisa interrupts you, groaning. "Ibara, make it quick. I can't resist any longer."

The said male exhales. "If you insist.

"As I was saying... tonight is Valentine's day, as you're aware. And also... you seem to have been ignoring our rather obvious calls for you.

"So, we decided, tonight, we shall-"

Ibara is interrupted by your yelp, as you suddenly feel Nagisa bite down your neck, humming. The pain is brief, as he lets go as soon as he bites down, kissing the flushing mark now.

Based on his voice, Ibara is annoyed. "Your Highness, couldn't you have waited a bit longer?"

"...Mm. No." Nagisa quite plainly says, nibbling on your ear. "With her right in my grasp... I couldn't resist any longer."

The younger male sighs, then finally light filters into the room, although red(?) and dimly lit. It's not enough to blind you, just enough to see the two figures starting to swarm around you. "W-what?"

Now it's Nagisa's turn to be annoyed, as you seem to flinch away from him. "We're not going to hurt you... just simply show our want for you.

"We're quite endeared with you, little [name]. I'm quite surprised you haven't caught onto our advances..."

You stutter as Ibara suddenly sits on your own lap, and you're soon sandwiched between the two already-sweaty men, from their performance. Your head is yanked forward as Ibara takes your lips greedily, all signs of courtesy now gone as he seems to have also lost patience to reason with you. As he sees that you're not pulling away, he continues to ravish your lips, groaning softly. You still feel Nagisa's breath on your neck, watching him softly kiss all your tender spots and grinning to himself as he sees you flinch every single time.

"Mm... finally." Ibara finally breaks the long kiss, leaving you gasping like a fish out of water. "You taste just as I predicted... sultry, yet sweet."

You feel your body heat up at his comment... how long have they've been trying to pin your attention? A week? Month? Months?

You thought it was just you, pining for the two handsome idols. When in full retrospect, you weren't the only one satisfied with just the work-acquaintance relationship.

Both Nagisa and Ibara's advances and touches on you become more rushed, heated, the longer you let them do as they please. Even without you saying it, your complete submissiveness tells them loud and clear:

You like this too.

Ibara curses under his breath, shifting as his pants grow tight. "Nagisa," He completely disregards his usual title for the older male. "Lay them down. I'm getting too damn impatient now."

The said idol obliges quite easily, letting you go of his tight hold and setting you down on the wide, long couch. Usually having... ahem, sex on a couch was rather uncomfortable, but it seems that this piece of furniture would suffice well for the three of you... you wonder if they planned this deliberately.

As soon as your set down Ibara immediately hovers over you, Nagisa taking a seat near your head. As the maroon-haired male props his elbows on either side of your head, he leans dangerously close, looking quite... tempting even as his glasses slightly slide down his nose.

"Do you want to know why I didn't allow you to know about the music or the choreography?"

"..."

Ibara hums. "...well, it would just ruin this night even more for us. If you haven't connected the dots yet... those lyrics?

"About this night. About you."

You blink, your cheeks heating up profusely. "...H-how long have you've been trying to- ahem."

Nagisa speaks up. "Around a month..."

Oh dear.

The younger idol shakes his head. "The past doesn't matter now. You're here in our clutches now... god, I can't wait to just ruin you..."

He flips you over on your stomach, forcing your legs up so that your ass is in the air. You let out a faint squeak, reddening even more as your face is quite close to Nagisa's pelvis... quite close to the rather large tent in his pants.

The cold air hitting your bare ass barely bothers you as Nagisa lifts your head up slowly, shifting to his knees as he gets ready to use your mouth. As he tantalizingly takes off his pants, you feel Ibara's fingers prod at your hole, chuckling as he feels that it's decently wet... he needs it soaking, though. He's not going to just rail you for hours to start with a measly arousal.

Your whimpers are soon muffled as you slowly sink your mouth down on Nagisa's now-exposed cock, the tip angry red as the veins bulge. You barely make it halfway before you start struggling, your hands clenching onto the sofa fabric.

Ibara's fingers make their way into your hole, abusing your poor cunt as he quickly brings you to a high. You moan around Nagisa's cock, shivering as you hit your first orgasm for the night... but certainly not the last, far from it. Ibara seems to finger-fuck you faster, relishing your now-twitching finger and muffled whines. Nagisa lets out a pleased sigh, his head bobbing back as his fingers thread your hair as your moans vibrate his cock.

You're pushed into another orgasm again, making your moans more frequent and louder. Nagisa seems to lose his composure, gripping your hair and shoving his entire length down your throat. You choke violently, gagging as hot tears run down your cheeks as you moan shamelessly, being used as nothing but a toy for the two idols.

"God," Ibara curses, scooping up your arousal to taste it. "A little part of me wanted to fuck you on that couch on the stage, right in front of everybody.... what would you think of that, your Highness?"

"..."

Ibara sighs, looking down back at you. "Nevermind... besides, you're already here. Why should I wish for anything better? Public or not, we're still going to ruin you..."

Nagisa lets out a soft groan, pelvis jerking as he comes down your throat. You gag loudly, clutching the sofa as you feel the hot liquid go down your throat. There was so much, too much... your gag reflex triggers, and you feel yourself choking back up some of Nagisa's cum, staining your lips.

The male seems satisfied with your reaction, pulling away from your mouth and wiping your lips clean with a kiss. Just as he finishes, Ibara is taking his pants and boxers off, ready to enter his shaft into you.

He slips into you easily with a groan, your own mewl pairing perfectly. Nagisa watches with piercing eyes as you're propelled forward by Ibara's force, fucking into you erratically without giving you a change to adjust to his size. Your moans are loud, unhinged, and watery due to the previous blowjob. Your hips are about to collapse, but Ibara keeps a death-grip on them, definitely bruising them. Small groans leaves the idol, his glasses slipping further down his nose as he pounds your tight cunt.

You wail loudly, clutching onto Nagisa's thighs in front of you and leaving small crescents into his skin from your nails. Seeing you get railed so effortlessly has Nagisa heating up again, his sex hardening once more. "..."

"Fuck- you're so tight," Ibara laughs breathlessly, picking up his pace just to hear you moan even more. "How many loads will it take before you're leaking with our seed, huh dear producer?"

You whimper at that, clenching around his length. "I- I'm not sure..."

Ibara smirks at Nagisa. "Let's experiment then, shall we?"

---

It took only two loads to fill you to the brim, but the two didn't stop there.

Pounding into you, biting your skin and marking it up, abusing your poor clit and cunt, you were left a mess when they were done with you hours later. Your sex was puffy and leaking with their mixed seed, your stomach even slightly bulging of how much they managed to keep inside you. You're dazed, hazy as they managed to haul you out of the dressing room without being caught.

Nagisa looks at your dumb state. "...Can we do this again, Ibara?"

The said idol barks out a laugh. "Why, of course! You enjoyed this as much as I did, no? Just filling her up makes me so aroused~"

"...I filled her up more."

"No you didn't, Nagisa. Shut up.

Taglist: @ciderwebs @himeru-soulmate @ibaraluvr

[rabbitcyclops]

Headcanons Of the Curses!

Note: (I do believe curses have no concept of human gender constructs, I'm just going with what feels right)

Hanami 🌸 She/They

🌸 Favorite food: Hanami is a diverse taste in food, they'll try anything as long as it was sourced respectfully from the environment. Also, nothing with added chemicals or preservatives. I think they're a huge fan of dandelion tea! 🌸 Favorite music: Any LoFi with nature sounds or just straight up nature ambiance. She has a "Nature is the best playlist" mentality. 🌸 Hobbies: Of course, gardening is their main hobby, but I like to imagine they also like to learn about plants and meditate. Maybe they make zen gardens out of sand, too.

Mahito 🐇 He/ They/ It

🐇 Favorite food: I'd expect something bitter and savory. Definitely some strange foods like black ice cream! If you let Mahito into the kitchen it'll make something cursed like a cake with frosting and crab legs (T-T) 🐇 Favorite music: I look at Mahito and he gives me HUGE breakcore fan vibes, something about the distortions of sounds and almost chaotic beats is really perfect. 🐇 Hobbies: Reading ofc, I think he'd like drawing too. Mahi is also a huge people watcher.

Dagon 🐙 He/ She/ They

🐙 Favorite food: Big appreciator of all things seafood, as one would expect, but I have a feeling he also really likes stuff like Gelato and Sorbet! Also, a huge fan of dried crispy seaweed! 🐙 Favorite music: I know this is very specific, but I think Dagon would listen to chill french music, like songs with very soft vocals and dream-like instrumentals. I wish I could link an example of what I mean, but I can't seem to find a good song. 🐙 Hobbies: Dagon is the type to collect seashells! They and Hanami also hang out a lot, so he also learns quite a bit of gardening. She just chills out a lot, it's nice.

Jogo 🌋 He/ They

🌋 Favorite food: Jogo's the type to love some spicy food! But I think he secretly enjoys sweet foods a lot too, like lava cake and ice cream. He steals a bit of Hanami's tea once in a while, too. 🌋 Favorite music: This is me projecting, but I think he'd like Japanese Rockabilly, if he wasn't too stubborn to refuse to listen to human music. I feel like it fits with his whole "delinquent with a golden heart" thing he has going on. 🌋 Hobbies: Jogo doesn't have a lot of hobbies, he likes collecting cursed objects and weapons and likes to organize them neatly!

Thank you for reading~

[agirlwholovesrockstars]

smile idiot, I love you

☆ EDDIE MUNSON'S MASTERLIST ☆

❣ AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE ❣

• Summary : you called Eddie because you've been so down lately nothing brightens you up whatever you try to do but he only leads you to disappointment

• Word Count : mini fics for a reason hehe

• Warnings : 18+ Bestfriend!Eddie Munson x FEM!reader, cursing, reader and Eddie are both (20), use of y/n, self-doubt, overthinking, worrying about the future, just a dash of personal family problems, slight allusions to su*cide, not feeling good enough, Eddie can be a real idiot on this lol, reader is just really having a bad week and she needs someone to comfort her, that's it

• What to Expect : friends to lovers, angst and fluff

• Note To Reader : I'm trying to write more as I can here! so, I hope you'll appreciate it! 🥺🫶🏻✨ also I kinda projecting myself on this fic :')) I just wish there's someone like Eddie in my highschool life, but the problem is I am Eddie in highschool 😭

• Author Note : actually, the fic title itself has a history on my middle school days, it's what I quote to my crush for over (10 years 👀) HELP HAHAHA yeah I still do have a crush on that specific person until now anyways enough about me, I just realized that little phrase is so perfect for Eddie hehe

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You're now entering adulthood

Well, a young adult

Sooner or later, you'll be 21 and feeling like you haven't accomplished anything yet

You feel young but also at the same time you feel old

You know it is wrong to be worrying about your future because you're ignoring what you're having right now

You can't lie to yourself for it, you're grateful and thankful for all the blessings that come into your life

You got healed by all of things that scarred and traumatized you, the things that made you feel insecure about your looks and from all of the people who betrayed you before?

Your past self will still be self-loathing, low-esteem and still keep holding grudges

But now, you made peace with that like truthfully

You have never been more so comfortable and confident in your whole life after all of the things that happened back in when you we're 14

You seriously just can't help that you're like stuck in the middle didn't know which road or path that you will take over

Many people say that is okay if you don't have anything yet, is it that much more exciting?

But sometimes the fear comes first on you like you think about it a lot

What if this is it?

What if this is who you will be with all of your life?

College life, finding and looking for a job, trying anything you possibly can to earn money for your needs

It's all coming too fast it's like what they say, "Take a good care of treasuring your moments while still in your teens because time moves speedily"

It's true, you feel like you just had your 18 birthday yesterday and now all of the sudden you woke up and now you're 20

You're reaching your 20's and can't help but also worrying about your relationship status

Your family and everyone who is close to you are expecting you to be married

"Snap out of it!" You vocally told yourself to shut up your running mind

You close the door behind you

But before you take the stairs heading to your bedroom, you want to talk about how you feel with your parents

The moment you're about to open the sliding doors in the backyard, you overheard your parents arguing with each other

You frown and slumped your shoulders

You decided against it, so, you grip tightly on your bag and walk upstairs to your bedroom

You closed the door, you pressed your back on it and sliding down to sit on the carpeted floors of your bedroom and then threw your bag on your chair and you deeply sighed

You facepalmed yourself as your mind goes running a muck

You glanced at the telephone on your bedside table

Should you call Eddie?

Nah, he doesn't even want to be a part of your problem, you don't want to be a burden

The time when you get comfortable around Eddie, it feels like you can tell many things to him and he won't even judge you for it

The thing is that, you both haven't crossed that line in the level of friendship

You haven't showed your side of vulnerability and of course, he hasn't seen you sad like this

There's a splash of embarrassing feeling that is crawling under your skin and also you know you will regret opening up to him because you aren't used to it anymore

You used to be vocal about how you really feel to some of your friends

But since one of them betrayed you

Used your personal problems against you and shamed you for it, told somebody else about it and it saddens you and angers you

It changed everything, now, it's so hard to trust everybody for you

Ever since you and Eddie started your friendship, you've been itching to give him a glimpse of you that sometimes your life isn't happy-go-lucky most of the time

You can keep it to yourself, you know sometimes it isn't right to cling on somebody if you feel like this, you need to help yourself too

But now, you need it, you need someone else to listen

The muffled noises outside of your room, you could them more clearly behind the closed door, they still have the same heated argument, you think they went inside now

Your stomach grumbles, you really don't want to go down there while they're still having a fit but you sigh as you stand up and twist the doorknob open

They're in the living room as you headed towards the kitchen

You saw the plate that your mom prepared for you, you take it and grab a bottle of apple juice as you went back to your room quietly

"Hey, young lady!" Your dad shouted out to you as he loudly stomps, you flinched on the middle of the stairs

"Just leave her alone!"

"Why do you go to your room all the time, huh?!? Why don't you just eat in the dining table where you supposed to be?!?"

You hang your head low, you didn't speak but you can feel your heart racing

"Look at your kid! Our child is misbehaving and treating a lot of matters with disrespect"

"She is not acting like that-"

"She doesn't even talk to her parents!"

You still went on your bedroom finally but your tears are now clouding your vision as you placed your food at the small table in front of your bed

You glanced at the phone again and this time you didn't even hesitated, you dialed his telephone number as you collected yourself first and keep your breathing lowly

You're still sniffling and your tears still running down on your cheeks

You're too overwhelmed with everything

Your heart is about to explode of how much is going on right now, you feel like he doesn't gonna pick up the phone until few minutes later

"Hello?"

His voice lightens you up the moment you heard it

You cleared your throat "Eddie?" Your winced at your voice croaked

"Hey there, sweetheart!" He doesn't even notice how small your voice is

You mustered up and plastered a fake smile as if he can see you behind the phone

"Uh- I'm good, Eddie"

You can see him how he nods behind the phone as he spoke again "I miss you by the way"

Your eyes went wide to his words despite at how disastrous you look, your cheeks bloom in red

He missed you like a friend, right? Not the other way around?

"W-what?!?"

"I said I miss you!" He chuckles and it shoots more butterflies into your stomach at the sound of it

You squeezed your shut as your lips tug into a small smile as you wipe the residue tears from your face as you take a deep breath

You ignore the thrilling feeling that you're having right now as you ask him straight away

"Can you come over?" Your voice cracks as your eyes start to dart everywhere and hoping that he'll do it

You didn't even care if you sounded so weak at this point

You could hear him shuffling and making rustling sounds

You furrow your brows "Eddie, what are you doing?"

"I'm getting ready to come over" you can hear the keys to his van jingling

But before you can protest he said before he hanged up

"See you later, sweetheart"

"Are you sure-" the line went off as you stare at the phone with excited smile on your face

You freshen up and went in with your comfy sleepwear, you wore a strapped lavender top and short as you pull a cream cardigan sweater

You saw him parked in front of your house as you jogged towards the front door

Thank goodness, your parents are asleep they would never hear him coming

You unlocked and swing the door open before he can ring the doorbell

Your favorite smile of his appears as he saw you, he didn't even think twice of you hugging you

He also didn't noticed your lost eyes and your feeling blue expression

He lets himself inside as you manage to give him a smile

You told him to keep his voice low as you tell him your parents are asleep but he does his antics as always as you let out a genuine giggle

His eyes softens as he heard that a lot of times you hang out together

You both sat down on the couch as goes on with his usual rambling about his band and his D&D campaign

It's almost 8pm and you haven't told him what's the reason why he is here

Maybe, he thought that you called him to catch up with the things that you both missed out on for not bonding for the last 2 weeks

"E-Eddie" you tried to get his attention

But he still so very phased with his story to you

"The crowd goes crazy-"

"Eddie!"

He abruptly stops when your voice gets higher than before as you throw your hands up

His eyes goes a lot more bigger to your unusual behavior as he started to shift on his seat

"I'm sorry" you softly say as you look at him briefly on his eyes

"Eddie, I need to talk to you"

"Yeah, we're doing it aren't we? and you just rudely interrupted me"

"That's not-"

He cuts you off and you really don't want to get mad on you only one bestfriend who seems oblivious to what are you dealing now

"Can you recall of what I just said?" He exaggerated his words and becomes more dramatic

"You aren't even listening!" He runs his palms down playfully on his face

You're in disbelief

You tried to mask your shocked expression as you tried to chuckle

Does he even see the longing and need in your eyes?

Does he even know how low you are at the moment?

Or are you maybe picked the wrong person to talk to?

Maybe, you should've asked Max to come over instead of him

He feels that you're oddly quiet as he stopped talking again as he looked at you

He saw an unreadable expression on your face as he tries to understand it

That's the only time when he feels like something is wrong and off about this

He can feel how the atmosphere changed seconds later, he can feel the tension rising up in the air

You start to twiddle with your thumbs as you look down again

"Eddie, I called you to come over because I really need to talk to you"

"Yeah, we haven't seen each other for 2 weeks"

He's right at some points at that but not tonight, you incredulously laugh at him

"I-Isn't that the reason why I am in here?" He is confused as he tries to search for your face as you raised your head slowly

You look right back at him and that's where it hit him

The unreadable expression that he saw earlier, he can see it clearly now

He can see how hurt you look and how upset you are, his words caught up in his throat

That's where he finally realized that you're not doing any good ever since the call that you both had earlier

He feels like he's about to puke from his dumb actions

He can feel the bile forming up on his esophagus as he breath suddenly shudders at the sight of you

"I asked you to come here because I thought you will listen" you paused as you smile sadly at him

"It turns you're insensitive" you scoff as you went in the front door

He wants to hold your hand and ask for forgiveness but you ignore his words as you push him not too hard only for him to get him out of your house

Not giving him another word or a chance to let him talk as you already slammed the door closed as you start running up at the stairs as you let the tears fall

The phone rings is what made Eddie wake up

He groaned and he saw what time it is and now his head is like about to pop how achy it is

He only slept for 2 in a half hours

Did he ruin the friendship?

Is it over?

Did he lost the potential to have something more than friends with you?

His eyes went glassy as the events of last night replays back on his head as he massages his forehead as he picks up the phone

"Hello?" He sounds groggy but the person behind the other line is getting impatient with him

"It's about damn time!" Max's voice made him winced at it

"O-Oh hey, red- what-"

"Eddie, I think you need to check on her"

"Why?"

"Don't ask me questions just get in here!"

"That's my fault-"

"I knew it that you're the cause of it-" she takes a deep breath to calm down

"I-I'm just worried for her, Eddie- she isn't like this, she would've picked up the phone right now but she didn't, I can't contact her and I am literally here on her porch and I feel like she's keeping me away and ignoring me"

Eddie feels like a shit, there's this huge mega ton of weight fell down to his chest as he couldn't even take the guilt of his chest

"So, please, come here and I think you're the only one who can get to her"

"What makes you say that"

"Because, Eddie she has feelings for you"

He frozed and look back at the telephone as if she can see his reaction but he felt the eye roll that she did when Eddie went silent for a bit

"Oh, don't celebrate yet, you haven't talked to her"

"She may not say it to me but I can tell how the way she acts around you, you made her feel welcomed and that's hard for her, Eddie so don't take it by the heart if she goes sometimes harsh on you"

"Nah, red, thanks- I think I deserved the words that she thrown at me last night"

"What's the update?" He says as he watches the red headed girl getting panicked

Max paced back and forth on your front porch with her arms crossed

"There's none and I'm starting to feel unwell now"

Eddie stares at your front door as he thinks "Did you try to open the door?"

She shakes her head "No, I haven't- and also how can you be so calm?!?"

Eddie shushes her "Just be cool"

"I can't be cool" Max whisper-shouts at him as they quietly went inside

They call your name but no response and they look at each other with such suspense in the room and the fear of your state as the longer the silent increases

They climb up the stairs heading towards your bedroom

Eddie pressed the side of his face on the closed door and he hears a faint sound of a running water like a shower is open on your bathroom

He swivel his head quickly at Max as he told him what he heard and Max tenses as she tries to not jump into conclusions

Eddie opens the door to your bedroom only to find your bed is empty and hasn't properly placed back on its order

Your blinds are slightly open, the bathroom door is not fully closed and the light is on

They're starting to get nervous

Eddie spoke your name quietly again as he places his palms against the door as he pushes it further to open it

Max's heart breaks into half when she saw you sitting in the corner of your shower, you're still in your pajamas and it's now wet from the running water while you're crying horribly but the sight of you being somehow okay gives her a relief

She travels her eyes to your sink bunch of tissues everywhere and the weight is off with her chest as you didn't try to do anything

She knew that you have tendencies to do that and she always looks out for you even though you only give her an idea of what you truly felt, you don't elaborate it that much but just by one word, she knows

She just knows

You saw them both together standing in front of your bathroom doorframe that made you cover your face with your hands

Eddie is much more disheartened than last night seeing you like that is a punch to the gut

"I'll leave you to it, I'll stay downstairs" Max whispers to him as she gave him an encouraging smile as she left you both together as he closes the bedroom door

Eddie is determined to fix everything that he should've done last night

He makes his way over to you, you haven't seen him yet when he crouches down to hold you by his side, you flinched and gasp by his touch

Your knit your brows together at him as you eyes went everywhere on his face, he smiles at you and you mirrored his small gesture as he opens his arms as you went with it

He didn't even care if he gets wet like you

The water is now seeping through his clothes and his hair is getting damp but still he doesn't care

You hold onto to him like it was your last breath and that drives him to held you close to him

He rests his chin on the top of your head as you breathe heavily against his chest

"I'm so sorry" He says as his voice wavered as you pulled your brows together as you remove yourself off of him as you look at him in the eyes

"What- Eddie? I should be the one who is sorry because that is so selfish of me, I spoiled the night, you we're excited to tell me everything what I've missed from last 2 weeks and I'm just so self-centered not thinking about you first-"

He shook his head at you as he holds your hand you let him intertwined your fingers to him

"No, don't blame yourself, sweetheart- it's me, I am truly sorry about last night, I wish I could go back and redo the shitty thing that I did to you because I should've known, I should've known because I'm your bestfriend but I wanted to let you know that I do care about you so much, so much that I didn't get to sleep enough today I always think about you and please, please don't ever have doubts talking to me about the stuff that it's nagging with you because you can always be real to me"

You swallow the lump in your throat as you stare at him completely appalled to his words

His chest tightens, is he forgiven or not?

You watch how the water falls to him so perfectly and it's tempting to place your lips onto his, you didn't even thinking about it anymore

You already did

You breath hitches of your sudden action, the cold water seems to be so cold to you as you watch his cheeks turns to a tinge pink

He gave you a look that you don't seem to understand as he cups your cheeks as he returns the kiss

You yelp on the bathroom floor as you both started making out with each other with ragged breaths

He deepens it as he hold you by the waist as you held the back of his neck to pull him much more closer if that's possible

He felt your lips stopped moving as he looks back at you

Are you thinking that this is a mistake?

"Did I do something wrong?" It's a comedy to watch his face turns pale when you suddenly become quiet

"Smile idiot, I love you" you chuckle at him as you saw his shoulders relaxed as he takes a double look at you and what you just said to him

"You love me?!" He points to himself

You nod at him excitedly as you sheepishly smile

"Aww, I love you too, sweetheart- I can't fucking believe this" you giggled when he pulled you to give you another kiss

Max bangs the door that you two stop at what you're both doing

"You two better not get hanky panky in there!"

You both get dried up as you let him use your dad's old clothes

While Max is ordering pizza for lunch, you and Eddie are on the sofa, he's sitting while you're resting on his lap as he drew relaxing circles on your legs as his another hand caressing your head as you continue talking to him

He is attentive and looking at you intently

You told him everything and you see the way his shoulders slump and his eyes flashes with sympathy

"You're the strongest person that I know and I am proud of you, I really do" he kisses your cheek and you smile

"But you gotta remember that life isn't a race, this is not about who is going to be first one to be successful, there are a lot of people who don't know what their plans for their life yet and that is okay, don't you ever worry for the future and we are still young, there's so so sooooo many things to look forward to, there's so many great memories that haven't happened yet, just enjoy life and I swear on my Munson's doctrine that I don't care about what other people think of me and I'm just going to do what I want, what I love and enjoy and importantly what I like to do the most"

You giggled to his antics that never fails to make you feel happy and he soothes him

"I just get so overwhelmed with everything sometimes" you say as you avert gaze somewhere else

"That's normal, darling, because you're a human and you're not a robot" he boops your nose as you giggled again

"Do you think that I could do anything?"

"I think you're able to do amazing things and just set your mind to it"

"Thank you" you say to him, you feel a lot more better now

"Just trust me, you'll be fine" he says as he gently pats your thigh

"Okay, I started to get feel sick here because you two won't stop getting off with your hands with each other" she playfully throws up as you and Eddie both laugh

Eddie's eyes sparks mischief as he fires back at Max "Oh, she told me that you harboring feelings on me"

You cheeks went rosy as you glare at her, Eddie laughs at the look of betrayal in your expression

"Max!"

The doorbell rings as she ignores your imply as you she claps her hands together "Pizza!"

Eddie carefully removes your legs as he starts to help Max with the pizza

You watch them both as they get excited to bring everything at the coffee table and searching for a good film VHS

See, this is what you wanted

This is what you needed

Eddie is right, you'll be okay

As long as you have them and you evaluating your mentality and your physicality as you grew older and learn from every eventful happenings of your life and breaking free through your fears and letting yourself out there in your comfort zone, you will be proud of yourself more than ever

Because you know your story is not over

It's only just the beginning

[themousefromfantasyland]

Today I watched "I Saw the TV Glow", AKA, the film that made me bawl my eyes out for 2/3 of its runtime. AKA, the movie that made me feel physical pain. AKA, the movie that brought back traumas and memories that I never thought I still had.

I feel like to be the lonely, shy, repressed, queer kid who grows really attached to TV shows, and wants to really, REALLY leave reality behind to escape into them is a surprisingly universal experience.

Only texting this is making me cry all over again.

I saw myself in Owen so much, but growing up I didn't have a Maddy, and somehow that hurt even more.

I will just say, Once Upon a Time was my Pink Opaque. I was 11-12 years old when it was released and I was already obsessed with Disney and fairy tales.

For those who don't know, the plot of the show revolves about fairy tale characters from a fantasy land being cursed into becoming everyday people into a boring, and repressive small town in Maine, with no memories of their true identities.

With a loving, but deeply homophobic family who couldn't understand this part about me, I saw myself in Henry Mills, the precocious boy obsessed with fairy tales, trying to break the curse and bring the magic back.

This sounds so cringe, but there was a brief time where I would fantasize which fairy tale character my family and me would be in the fantasy world.

This stupid show felt more real than reality

And this brings me to today, where my family continues loving, but their love has no importance, because they became more and more Christian, homophobic, and conservative. And very vocal about it. I love them so much, be we have no true connection.

My father can't even comprehend the idea of not being straight and cisgender. He thinks the "fags" will bring the downfall of humankind. No joke.

I would give everything to break the dark curse, to leave this world behind and have a fairy tale family that accepts me while we fight dragons. To live in an idealized fairy tale world where people would not hate me for being gay. At least not my family.

And now, excuse me, because I have to cry a little more.

@the-blue-fairie @ariel-seagull-wings @thealmightyemprex @mask131 @tamisdava2 @natache @theancientvaleofsoulmaking

[nanaminsonyfans]

╚»★«╝ Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire ╚»★«╝

a/n; the lack of cyberpunk x reader fics is appalling. anyways gay kerry eurodyne for christmas ur welcome. also this is post after giving up johnny specifically the sun ending. sorry of its shitty, i rarely write as a male reader and i hope i did okay! requests are open!!!

pairing: male!reader x kerry eurodyne (cyberpunk)

warnings; anal, male oral receiving, slight exhibition?, cursing, spoilers for end of cyberpunk.

—

The Kerry Eurodyne was making a Christmas album with US Cracks, him being main vocals and the girls being background vocals. You were there as Kerry's loving boyfriend and supporter but also because you had nothing else to do. Being the famous V merc has run its course and after everything with Johnny and Arasaka....you just wanted to be you, Y/n L/n. Of course you still talked to some old friends, Claire being one of them. Truth be told....You missed Johnny. A piece of you was gone.

"Y/n? Babe? You there?" Kerry's voice brought you back. The girls were gone leaving the two of you there. "You having one of those episodes again?" He asks softly, obviously worried. "Oh, no i'm fine. Was just thinking is all. The music was pretty soothing." You joke and stood up. "Was it? Didn't want to put you to sleep." "You didn't. Just started to remind me of stuff." Kerry nods and cupped your cheek. "This past year has been hard for you. I understand." You nod and leaned against his touch. His hands were always so warm.

"I gotta finish some vocals. Go get a drink." He hums softly. You nod, leaving and came back. Kerry was singing, however his vocals sounded almost angelic as he sang The Christmas Song. "Jack nipping at your nose~" He looked at you. He looked at you with those fucking icy blue eyes that just sucked you in every single time. You know what he wants. How'd he get so horny so easily? Sentimental one second...

You stared at him, watching his movement. He swayed his hips as he practically made out with the mic. You felt your jeans tightened as you wanted him until you couldnt take anymore and went in. "You're such a little shit sometimes...." You growl slightly in his ear, griping his hips as you pulled him against your growing bulge. "Yeah...?" Kerry hums, adding more pressure against you. You let out a guttural moan in his ear as he started to grind against you.

"You keep doing that and im going to cum in these fuckin' pants." "We can't have that." He hums and gets down on his knees. "Not when i have a perfectly good face." "Oh youre fucking bad Ker..." You groan as he undid your pants, your cock springing free seconds before he wrapped his mouth around you. His tongue was so soft and warm...and fuck the way he sucked you off was like his life depended in it. He was so eager to please and it was working.

Kerry's eyes were half lidded and staring up at you as if he was trying to be innocent. His hand took over whatever he couldn't reach. Drool slipped down his chin as he continued to suck. "Oh fuck ker...." You thrusted slightly in his mouth causing him to gag but he didnt want you to stop. You continued to face fuck him until you felt yourself getting close.

"Fuck..Fuck ker-" You pulled out and came on his face exactly as he wanted. "Mm...amazing as usual." He smirks and licked the cum up and cleaned himself up. "Now bend over." "Really? Here?" "Yes here its your fault." You tell him annoyed and Kerry did so, happily stripping down to give you a show. "Oh you fucking slut." You slapped his ass as he bent over on the couch in the studio.

You didnt even bother prepping and just thrusted in which earned a high pitched mewl from him. "Oh fuck- dont stop please." He begs and pushed his hips back to match the rhythm of your thrusts. His moans were so whiny it was pitiful, the sadistic side wanted to taunt him about it but another side of you loved his noises. Only you could bring these noises out if him, only you, only your cock.

You let out a few grunts as his ass milked you, and suddenly he let out a loud moan arching his back as you hit his prostate. He loved how the head of cock hit it just right. "Fill me up y/n please, please!" Kerry begs and he started to fist himself. "No one can say no to you." You smirk and started to rail him a few more times before you came together. "Fuuuck!" You groaned as you filled his ass making him whine at the feeling as he made a mess on the couch.

"You made a mess." You tease and kissed him which he happily returned. Out of the corner of you eye you noticed a blinking red light. "Did...did it record all of that?" You ask him and kerry took notice as well. "Yeah...maybe i should put it on the bonus track."