#i think i'm too old to be feeling some typa way after looking at jaehyun but i couldn't help it

[wonton4rang]

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Baby, I'm so toxic ¡!

pairing: bnd x reader.

warnings: toxic behaviour, mentions of violence (verbally and physically, nothing explicit, just mentions of it), jealousy, mentions of smut, mentions of cheating. and lmk if i missed anything.

summary: bnd as toxic traits i think they'll have during a relationship.

note: can someone tell me what "hcs" are and an example? i got like three requests using the same term and i'm very very lost 😔 would really appreciate some definition :')

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sungho;

control freak. he is the type to be so involved in your life that it's kinda cute at the beginning, how he would call you at all times, wants to know where you at, who are you with, what you ate, why are you late, why you didn't pick up his call within the first seconds... it got old really fast. he would want to choose what you wear, go everywhere with you, check your phone even if there was nothing there just because "there should be trust" ??? he would also start to pick and choose your friends, telling you which ones he liked and which ones you BOTH should meet.

riwoo;

insecurities. don't get me wrong, insecurities can happen, they are the most natural thing. but when he starts portraying his insecurities on you, projecting them and trying to manipulate you with it, that's when it gets ugly. he would say things like "you shouldn't do that because it makes me feel insecure" and suddenly you wouldn't do it because you loved him so much. plus, i know it sounds more like 'manipulation' than actual insecurities but he does feel insecure and uses it at his own favor to stop you from talking to or meeting people that made him feel smaller.

jaehyun;

too 'friendly'. wbk that myungjae is an extroverted puppy like typa boy, he would have really close female friends and it's not like you mind but when you get to y'alls table and find some girl sitting in your boyfriend's lap, it's not your favourite scene to watch. so you would have serious arguments with him, explaining how you didn't feel comfortable to see some chick sitting on his lap with her arms around his neck and their faces so close they could share breath and kiss at any moment. he just laughed and said you were being too insecure and that you should quit it, that he met those girls way before he knew you so it was just natural ???? be so fucking for real rn.

taesan;

nonchalant. ah *sigh* he would literally ghost you for weeks. meeting you at your place and listening to you talk about how worried you get and how you couldn't even count on him after y'all got separated and went home because he wouldn't even see your messages or pick up your calls. he wouldn't say a thing and you would just stand there, staring into this bored eyes and clicking your tongue but it was fucking useless. "is there something you wanna tell me?" but he just shrugged, laying back in your bed and just letting a sigh out, that 'done' look in his face letting you know he didn't give a single fuck about the things you were saying.

leehan;

obsessive. similar to sungho's tbh but more into the jealousy obsession kinda thing. he would check your phone on a regular basis, he would hold your waist and do very inappropriate stuff in front of your friends, side eyeing them if they ever complimented you. he would basically yell at you and forbid you from going out without him because why would you wanna go to a party or a club or a bar without your boyfriend?? were you cheating or something?? you bet that your neck was bruised due to his lips sucking on your skin and leaving hickies that he would make you show to everyone just to assert that you were his.

woonhak;

anger issues. yeah, woonhak is such a sweet boy, so cute and lovely, being so happy and energetic around you, kissing your cheeks and holding your frame with adoration, talking to you for hours through the phone and even playing some songs for you to fall asleep with. but when he gets angry, that's when you get uneasy, your hands are shaking when you see his tall figure cover you and press you against the wall, and tbh you weren't even listening anymore to his yelling because you became so scared of him that your senses would go numb and all that you could percive were his hands shaking your shoulders and his reddened face while he looks at you like he hates you. why was he so angry anyways? you didn't even know but he would just get mad over anything and everything, you were growing tired of it, but when he stopped being that angry and started to apologize? you just gave in. you just liked him that much :(

[zzaehyunzz]

waking up beside jaehyun

Jung Jaehyun x Reader  Genre: fluff, angst Word count: 1908

a/n: It’s my first time writing a fic after some time. I was really into writing fanfics back in 2011-12 but I stopped. This is the first one after 6 years so… forgive me if it isn’t up to standard.

Light streamed through the darkness and you frowned. You turned away from the light and tried to fall back asleep. Pulling the blanket over your shoulders, you snuggled into the warm pil… Oh? Your nose and lips weren’t pressed into your pillow like you expected. It felt like… skin. Like someone else’s body.

You opened your eyes immediately and gasped. A very wide and very naked back was right there. Fuck. Suddenly conscious, your eyes snapped back to your own body. “Shit,” you cussed. You were just as naked. You were about to jump out of bed when you looked around and realised that it wasn’t your room. You were in… Johnny’s room? “The fuck?” you muttered as you got out of the bed.

What is going on? Why the fuck am I in Johnny’s room?

You rushed to the closet, picking up your underwear on the ground along the way. Swiftly, you put on your underwear and a white shirt that you had grabbed from the closet. Carefully, you took a deep breath as you inched closer to the sleeping form. You didn’t have on your lenses and everything looked blurry. You knelt in front and peered at the boy. Half of his face was smashed into the pillow.

Please don’t let it be Johnny. Please don’t let it be Johnny. Please don’t- Suddenly, he turned over and you had a clear full-frontal view of his face. His… very handsome face. The face you always thought about. The face you had a crush on. The face that- Oh fuck. Snapping out of it, you slapped your forehead. This wasn’t the time to swoon over your bed-mate. You slept with Johnny’s best friend, Jung fucking Jaehyun.

Johnny is going to kill me. And if Johnny doesn’t kill me, this hangover will. You sighed deeply knowing you were in deep ass trouble.

Jaehyun’s breathing changed. He breathed in deeply, popping an eye open and he sleepily propped himself up on his elbows. He squinted at the sun streaming in from the window as he cleared his dry throat, not once looking over at you.

Unable to wait, you coughed awkwardly. His head turned immediately and his eyes laid on you in shock. “Ah, you scared me, y/n!”

“Jaehyun…”

“My head is spinning,” he groaned, sitting up. The blanket fell to his hips as he held his head in his hands. You caught a peek of his manhood and you blinked away immediately.

“Er, Jaehyun, do you want to, erm, maybe put on some pants?” you stuttered.

“What?” he asked. Looking up at you, you pointed at his manhood and he choked. “Oh, my god. Sorry. I didn’t know I was naked. Sorry.” You grabbed a pair of pants on the ground and threw them to him. He quickly pulled on his pants under the blanket, his eyes on you the entire time. “Wait… Are you wearing my shirt?”

“I think so?” you mumbled.

“Why?” he asked as his eyes scanned your body. Suddenly, he gasped lightly then he went silent. His eyes shot back and forth. “Did we…? Last night...” His eyes met yours and you couldn’t help but nod.

“We were drunk,” you started. “And, uhm… it just happened, I guess.” Lies. It didn’t just happen. You were drunk but you knew you kissed him first. You couldn’t remember how it progressed but you had started it.

Silence filled the room, the tension rising. You didn’t know what to say. You were awkward and it was obvious that the feeling was mutual. He licked his dry lips and cleared his throat. “Why don’t we wash up first then we’ll talk, okay?”

You didn’t want to talk. You wanted to run and hide. But you nodded.

“You can use the bathroom here, I’ll use the one outside.” He got up and left the room after picking out some clothes and you made a beeline to the en-suite bathroom.

Why did I kiss him first? Why did he kiss me back? Now, what am I going to tell Johnny? How am I going to face Jaehyun later? Or ever? I hate this. Oh God. I hate this so much.

Johnny was your best friend and the only rule the both of you had was that friends were off-limits. You crossed the line and you groaned, thinking of how you were going to explain to Johnny. Your head was pounding and you desperately needed a shower.

 After the calming shower that took twenty minutes, you walked out the room to see that food was already on the table. “I made some soup and rice for breakfast,” Jaehyun said. “Sit down.”

Awkwardly, you sat down. “Thank you,” you murmured. He sat opposite you and the both of you dug in, absentmindedly. You didn’t know what to talk about and he was equally stumped.

A few pregnant minutes passed before he started.

“Last night…”

“Was nothing to worry about,” you quickly finished. You looked up at him and his brows were raised. “Really. Don’t worry about it.”

“What?” His face hardened and you sighed.

“Let’s just pretend last night never happened, okay?” you suggested. You thought that that would be the best for both of you.

“Why?” He put his spoon down and stared at you.

You swallowed as you said, “I don’t want Johnny to find out.”

Jaehyun’s lips were pressed into a thin line, his jaw taut. “You don’t want Johnny to find out?” he repeated after you. Every word chopped up as if he was controlling his anger.

“He’ll get mad,” you admitted softly. You searched Jaehyun’s eyes, sending begs through your eyes. “Please? Can we just not mention anything about last night? It never happened, okay?”

He let out a breath and blinked at you. He stared at you for the next 3 seconds before he closed his mouth. Blinking a few more times, he nodded once. “Fine.” He sounded clipped and a little pissed as he picked up his spoon and mixed his rice and soup loudly, his spoon clanging against the bowl.

“Thank you,” you said sincerely. You didn’t know why he was acting like this but you were glad that Johnny would never find out.

It was quiet for a while as you ate, with some occasional sounds breaking the silence. You weren’t BFFs with Jaehyun before but it was never this awkward. He was your friend and he was a good friend to you but the situation at the breakfast table didn’t seem that way.

It resembled greatly like two strangers sharing a table at a crowded restaurant.

You were about to start a generic topic when he commented, “If he asks, I won’t lie about it.”

Your heart raced at the thought of Johnny ending his friendship with you once he found out that you didn’t tell him at the first instance. “He won’t ask if you don’t tell.”

“I don’t like lying to him, y/n. I tell him everything and I won’t lie about something like this if he finds out.” He bored into your eyes and it held a little bit of sadness there. Johnny was very fond of Jaehyun, in a non-romantic sense, of course. Jaehyun was like family to him.

Seemed like Jaehyun saw Johnny the same way. Just like you did.

“As long as you don’t act weird around me, he won’t find out, okay?” You spoke in a warm and gentle tone but Jaehyun sighed. He closed his eyes and sighed again.

“How… How do you expect me to act like nothing happened?” he breathed.

You tilted your head and took your turn to sigh. “Jaehyun, no matter how, you have to. Johnny cannot find out about what happened. Do you understand?”

“Why can’t we just tell him?” Jaehyun folded his arms and laid them on the table, leaning forward.

“We can’t!”

“Why not?” he challenged.

“Johnny clearly warned everyone that his friends are off-limits. He warned us a million times, remember? He didn’t want to have to choose if that time came. And I think he’s right. And you’re a celebrity. It won’t help anyone if word gets out,” you explained, hoping Jaehyun would understand where you were coming from.

“So just because Johnny said so, and just because I’m not a normal person, we can’t be honest?” He was holding your glare and you dropped your spoon in the soup.

“Jaehyun, please! Can you just look at all the negative things that would follow if we told Johnny?” you exclaimed. “It was a one-night-stand. Just forget it happened.”

He gritted his teeth and flashed an angry look. “Is it because you like Johnny?”

“What?” you yelled. “Do you hear yourself?”

“Do you like Johnny?” he pressed.

“No!”

“Then tell him you slept with me last night.” Your jaw dropped. You had no idea what was happening and why Jaehyun was reacting like this.

“Jaehyun!” you yelled again.

“If you have no feelings for him, then tell him,” he said as he matched your volume.

“Why do you insist on telling him we hooked up? Why? It was one night. That’s all it was, isn’t it? Why do we have to destroy our friendship with Johnny because of last night?” you reasoned. Your head was hot and you were pissed. 

Your eyes were challenging him.

Taking a deep breath, he licked his lips and dropped his eyes. “Because it’s not just one night,” he muttered. 

Your heart skipped a beat. “What?” What did he mean by that?

“It’s not just one night,” he repeated. He opened his mouth to say something but then he closed it.

“What are you saying?” you probed.

“I’m saying… that I don’t want last night to just be one night.” He swallowed his saliva. “I want it every night… for as long as you want to.” Your eyes widened and your jaw went slack. His eyes slowly traveled and it met yours. “Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“J-Jaehyun,” you stuttered. “I…” Your lips were numb.

“I like you,” he confessed firmly. “Since a long time ago.” You looked away unable to hold his gaze. But he stood up, slowly walking over to you and your heart beating harder with every step. He lowered his body and turned your chair towards him as he knelt on a knee in front of you. 

“Jaehyun, can we please talk about this later? Right now, I can’t-”

“I said I like you,” he repeated. Your heart stopped, as you met his eyes. He was sincere. His eyes were warm and pleading. “I want Johnny to know what happened and I want last night to be a start for us.” 

You tried to speak but nothing came out. He quietly gazed at you. “Jaehyun, I really don’t think that we should-” You were cut off as he stole a peck from you. You gasped, feeling the soft lips against your own, familiar and addicting. “Ah-” He kissed you again. And again. And again when you tried to speak. Defeated, and giddy with happiness, you nodded. 

“Really?” he smiled. You nodded, returning the smile. He pulled you up with him and wrapped his arms around your shoulder, tucking your head under his chin. “Thank you, y/n. Thank you.” 

You sighed, happy but knowing the drama that would happen later. But at least for now, and for as long as you want, Jung fucking Jaehyun would be yours.

a/n: i hope you guys like it!

[zzaehyunzz]

Breaking up

Jung Jaehyun x Reader

Genre: angst, sad

Word count: 1800+

Hey everyone reading this, I was really excited doing my previous fic so I did another! Sorry for the formatting, I did this on mobile so... hope you guys enjoy it anyways.

You made up your mind. You knew what you wanted and what you had to do and where you had to go. You were determined. Even if it meant leaving your first love. The first man you promised yourself you’d always love. You knew that no matter what happened; whether you guys went on to forever or if it ended somewhere in the middle, that you’d always, always love this boy: Jung Jaehyun.

The thing was… You didn’t know how to break the news of your leaving to him.

It was pouring that night, accurately depicting your feelings as you waited in your usual spot at the café. He was running late and your nerves were doubling by each minute that passed. Sipping your hot coffee, you went over in your head what you had prepared to say to him.

You didn’t think it would be easy but you definitely didn’t know it would be this hard. He was always a bunch of happiness, bringing you immense joy and laughter during the four years you were together. But ever since he had debuted, things weren’t easy. He was constantly busy and you were alone a lot.

Instead of demanding more attention from him, you threw yourself into school and later, your internship. You made time for him whenever he was free but even that wasn’t often. As a result, you started working a lot and you enjoyed it, surprisingly. You took pride in your work and you were recognised by the bosses.

So when you got the notice that a full-time position would be offered to you, you had accepted it without discussing with Jaehyun. There was no reason to reject it; everything was a plus, except that it was based overseas. But even so, you really wanted the job. You just hoped that Jaehyun would be open to accept a long-distance relationship.

You tried to calm yourself down but nothing seemed to work. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out. Relax. Not long after, you heard his footsteps nearing.

“Y/n,” he called out, walking by your shoulder and plopping down in front of you.

“Hey,” you said with a tiny smile as you straightened. You still swooned at how handsome he looked in his effortless fashion. Jaehyun had a grey hoodie on with black jeans and pair of white sneakers. His hair fell over his forehead and his mask covering half of his face, showing only a pair of soft, brown eyes.

He stretched his hand across the table to cover your smaller ones. “Sorry I’m late,” he apologised with a little pout. “We had an impromptu meeting with the management.”

You shook your head. “That’s okay.” He pulled his mask down to shoot you an apologetic smile.

“Did you wait long?” he worriedly asked. He didn’t like that you always had to wait for him. He wanted to be like other boyfriends who waited for their girlfriends.

“Nope,” you smiled reassuringly. “I got here twenty minutes ago.” Lies. You were here for two hours, on your fourth cup of coffee, wrecking your brains on how to break the news.

“Sorry,” he apologised again. Grinning, you reached over to hold his face and he leaned in your palm.

“I said it’s fine,” you reiterated. “Don’t worry.” He sighed with a contented smile before nodding. As you let go of his face, you realised it was then or never. You had to start somewhere. Taking a deep breath, you started. “So, erm, I needed to talk to you.”

His eyes snapped to yours and you could see the panic. He was calm but his eyes were alert. “That does not sound good,” he commented, grabbing your cup of coffee for a sip.

“It’s, uhm,” you stuttered. “It’s about work.” He nodded slowly, urging you to go on. “I, uh, I was offered a full-time position.” You smiled anxiously.

A grin broke his stoic face. “That’s good! I knew you could do it.” He always, always told you how great he thought you were at your work. So supportive. But…

“But, er,” you nervously continued. “It’s not based in Seoul.”

Jaehyun raised his brows, confused. “Not in Seoul?” he repeated. “It’s in another city?” You blinked once and shook your head. Frowning, he held your gaze for a moment before you averted your eyes guiltily. And immediately, he got it. He knew and he sighed. Licking his lower lip in frustration, he put down your cup and leaned over, folding his arms on the table.

“Jaehyun,” you called gently, trying to explain.

“Overseas?” he cut in. His face was back to its stoic mode and to be honest, you were a little scared. He usually had an easy smile on his face. “Where?”

“China,” you answered quietly.

He let out a breath and closed his eyes. “Reject it. I’ll get you a job in SME. There’s an opening for the project team. I can get you an interview.” He whipped out his phone and started tapping away.

You frowned, slightly taken aback at his sudden dominance. “I took the job.”

He stopped typing on his phone and just blankly stared at the screen for the next five seconds. “What?” he said. He looked up slowly and met your eyes.

You bit on your lower lip. “I said I took the job.”

It was his turn to frown as he dropped his jaw. “You want to go to China and work?”

You looked into his eyes for a moment, registering his anger and yet, you nodded. “Mm.”

He took a deep breath. “It’s not a permanent placement, right?” You dropped your eyes and sighed. Jaehyun huffed and looked at you like you betrayed him. “It’s a permanent placement? And you still want to go?”

“Jaehyun, please,” you pled. “It’s my career we’re talking about. Can you don’t make it seem like I’m trying to leave on purpose?”

“Are you not?” he shot. His eyes were fierce and his jaw was taut.

“Of course not!” you countered. “Why would I want to leave you on purpose?” You reached out to hold his hand but he retracted his, avoiding you. Wow. That hurt.

“You could’ve rejected it or you could’ve asked for more time so you could discuss this with me first. But you went ahead to accept the offer and now you’re informing me like I’m some friend?” He was so angry.

You pushed your hair back, sighing. “You would’ve said no,” you stated.

“Yes, Y/n, of course I would’ve said no,” he agreed. “Did you think I’d be okay letting my girlfriend leave me?”

“Jaehyun,” you calmly said. “I’m not leaving you. I’m leaving the country to chase my dreams.” He was disappointed, his face sagged with no emotions.

Humourlessly, he laughed once. “How is that different?” He laid on the backrest of the chair. “I’m in this country, Y/n. If you leave this place, you’re leaving me.”

You held your head in your hands, feeling all sorts of sadness. “We can try long-distance, Jaehyun.”

He closed his eyes and let out an angry breath. His eyes flashed when he reopened them. “No. It’s already hard as it is now. I don’t get to see you whenever I want to. And now, you want to try long-distance? I see you once every 3 weeks if I’m lucky. If you go to China, I’d see you once a year when you come back to visit during Christmas?”

It got to you. He was acting like he was the innocent party here when really, both of you were at fault. “Is it my fault that we don’t get to meet enough?” you shot.

He straightened. “So this is about me not making enough time for you?”

“No!”

“Then why, Y/n?” He widened his eyes in anger. “Why are you leaving me so easily? How could you say yes to leaving me without even asking me?” His voice was louder but you chose the isolated back spot of the café so it was safe.

“It’s my dream job, Jaehyun. Can you just understand that?” You were tired. You didn’t want to fight. It had been almost a month since you saw his face. You should be all up in each other’s personal space, cuddling, kissing and hugging. Yet, you were here in the middle of an argument.

“I love you, Y/n. Can you just understand that?” His sudden profession came as a surprise and you caught yourself tearing up. Reaching over, he held your cold, small hands. “I love you. I know it’s tough now. I’m sorry I don’t have the time to love you well. But I swear, we just need to get through these few years together. Once I’ve made a name for myself, it’ll be easier, I promise. I’ll have more time for us. Please, Y/n. Can you please stay? Don’t go.”

You thought about it, you played it out in your head. Letting the job go, getting hired elsewhere with lesser opportunities and you probably wouldn’t enjoy as much, waiting to see your boyfriend once every month, until you’re at least twenty-seven/eight with a bad job, dragging yourself to work every day until you withered.

Slowly, you shook your head. Jaehyun pressed his lips together, sadness resounding in his eyes. “I’m sorry,” you apologised, pulling your hands back to your lap. He tried to grab them again but you avoided his touch. “I have to take the job.” He looked at you for a moment, and you saw how hurt he was. You could feel the tension in the air and you wanted so badly just to hold him.

Jaehyun dropped his head and that was his tell-tale sign. He was tearing up quietly. He knew he lost you. You watched him silently as he pushed his hair back, slowly raising his head. You met his red-rimmed eyes and yes, it broke your heart. You could literally feel the cracking. “Sorry,” you whispered guiltily.

It was quiet for the next few seconds. The both of you sat there, processing what had happened and what this meant for the future.

“So… This is you breaking up with me?” he choked out and you felt it in the pit of your stomach.

You shook your head, silent tears building. “No. This is you breaking up with me.” His eyes were glassy upon hearing what you said. Feeling like you had to tell him, you whispered, “I love you.” He held in his tears and scratched angrily at his hair. “I’ll always love you,” you reminded.

He closed his eyes, silent tears falling. His nose was red, his lips pressed together as if he was in pain and his forehead was wrinkled.

Everything about him today broke your heart. Standing up, you walked over to him and dropped a light kiss on his forehead. He sighed sadly and just as you were about to let go, he wrapped his arms around your waist, his head on your chest. “Y/n, please,” he pled softly.

For the last time, you raised your hands, resting your elbows on his shoulder, you combed through his thick hair and you felt him shake. Unable to take it, you pulled away.

You walked off, out of the café and out of Jung Jaehyun’s life… into your new one.

a/n: There might be a part 2 to this! I’m not so sure yet. Thanks for reading!

[zzaehyunzz]

Breaking up: Part 2

Jung Jaehyun x Reader Genre: angst, fluff(?) Word count: 1734

A/n: I’m back with part 2!!! Part 1 seemed to have a good response so I wanted to give y/n and woojae a little happy ending. Please enjoy! 

You said you were busy but you stood just two steps away from the concert entrance. You couldn’t pass up any chance you had to see Jaehyun in person. Even if it was just as a fan, you knew you couldn’t let the chance pass you by. 

You passed your ticket to the counter and they scanned it. A few seconds passed before they passed you the other half of your ticket. “Miss?” one of the girls called. 

“Yes?” you answered automatically. 

“This ticket is a backstage-open ticket. If you follow our security guard, he’ll take you there,” she smiled politely. Your eyes widened. Backstage ticket? Should I say hello…? Or would that be too weird? You cursed your friend in your mind for giving you this extra ticket.

If only she didn’t give it to me, I wouldn’t be tempted to come.

Silently, you followed the guard. He led you through the basement and through the heavy-looking doors. You went in and saw people running about, just as busy as everyone could get. Trying not to bump into any of them, you avoided everyone when they passed you by. 

Suddenly, somebody carrying a big box ran in your direction, leaving you with no time to duck. You were a millisecond away from screaming just as you were about to get hit but someone grabbed you into a room you didn’t even notice was there. 

You heaved a big sigh of relief. “Thank you,” you breathed, holding your beating heart. 

“Y/n?” your saviour called. You looked around the empty room until you found the source of the voice. Straightening, your heart was full of warmth when you registered a familiar face looking at you in equal shock. 

“Oppa,” you smiled. It had a been awhile since you saw Taeyong. He was the person you and Jaehyun used to go to whenever advice was needed. Taeyong was the older brother you never had. Walking over, he chuckled and held your elbow. “What are you doing here?” he asked, surprise in his eyes. “My friend passed me an extra ticket,” you replied truthfully. Taeyong nodded. “Oh... Have you met Jaehyun yet?” You took a deep breath, shaking your head. “Nope. I just got here.” He searched your eyes for a second before he spoke. “Are you okay?” Taeyong asked.   “Ah…” You looked away. “It’s been 2 years. I guess I am?” “You… don’t miss him at all?” Taeyong asked, pulling you to the empty sofa, sitting you beside him. Taeyong took care of you like you were his member and you used to talk to him whenever you were upset with Jaehyun. Sitting with him like that on the couch made you remember the past and again, you wanted to cry. “Of course, I do,” you admitted. “But I can’t say I regret breaking up with Jaehyun. After all, I’m doing what I love now.”   Taeyong nodded with a small smile. “I’m happy for you. I’m happy that you’re doing what you love.” “Thank you, Oppa,” you said, sadly. You knew he loved Jaehyun dearly and he was angry with you when you left Jaehyun. But Taeyong was a nice person. “But you can yell at me. I know you’re mad at me.” Taeyong blinked and bit on his lower lip. “I was mad at you. Not anymore. I know why you did what you did. But… Jaehyun was hurt. Very hurt. And every day, I wish you could have stayed by his side.” You looked up guiltily. “Was he… I didn’t mean to… Did he… How is he?” Your tongue was tied, knowing you hurt him bad enough for Taeyong to mention it to you. “He’s just a shell of himself.” Taeyong gave you a sad smile. You dropped your head. “Oppa… I didn’t mean to.” “I know. You couldn’t have known what the break-up would do to him. I’m not blaming you, Y/n. Don’t worry,” he said. “Maybe, I was too selfish,” you whispered. “That day, after he told us you left, he was fine. Too fine after that,” Taeyong sighed. “We didn’t see him cry. He didn’t get angry or upset, nothing. He worked extra hard. Practiced a lot, took on a lot of extra activities. He stayed quiet when he was home. Too quiet. He lost his smiley-self and it felt forced whenever he had to smile.” Your heart hurt hearing that. You knew you had caused that and you felt the shame. “But one day, when we were all drinking, Johnny yelled at him. He didn’t want Jaehyun to bottle up his feelings. Johnny hated that Jaehyun wasn’t the same person after you left. So after he downed his sixth bottle of beer, he came clean.” It was quiet. His eyes were unfocused… glassy. “I miss her,” he admitted. “I miss her every single day. I smell her scent everywhere. I look at everything I have and there’s nothing that doesn’t remind me of her. And I don’t know if this is what heartbreak feels like but I can feel the hollow part of my heart. It doesn’t hurt but it’s there. I can feel coldness and I can’t get rid of it. I wake up every day and I feel the emptiness and I think about her and I wonder if she remembers that I love her. I wonder if she remembers that I’m still waiting for her to come back.   I want her back. I want her back.” “We wanted to call you,” Taeyong shrugged. “But Jaehyun begged us not to.” “I would’ve come back,” you cried. “I would’ve immediately flown back.” You felt the same way. Your heart felt the emptiness and you missed him every day. The hollowness reminded you of him every chance it got. “Oppa,” you croaked. “Did I make a mistake leaving?” Taeyong held your hand and shook his head. “Go to him,” Taeyong advised. “Trust me and go to him. Tell him everything you need to say.” “But the concert…” “It starts in an hour. There’s enough time,” Taeyong reassured. “He’s in 127’s waiting room. Go get him. Good luck.” You jumped into his opened arms and hugged him tightly. “Thank you,” you whispered as you let go. It was now or never, you thought, as you ran to the waiting room that said ‘NCT 127’. You opened the door carefully, your heart about to burst. It was almost empty with Mark at the corner. Jaehyun sat in front of the mirror, with his eyes closed and headphones on. Mark gasped upon seeing you and you put a finger to your lips. He grinned widely and nodded, creeping his way out but not before squeezing your hand. Smart boy Mark didn’t need any explanations. You inched towards Jaehyun and stood behind him. Looking in the mirror, you traced him with your eyes. His thick eyebrows, his soft, soft eyes, his high nose, his thin upper lip and plump lower lip, his dimples, his broad shoulders, his strong chest, his lean, muscular arms that held you before. Unable to help it, you leaned forward, slowly wrapping your arms around his shoulder, leaning your face against his. He opened his eyes immediately and met your eyes through the mirror. But he wasn’t surprised. At all. Realising that this was it, you teared up, feeling like he didn’t want you anymore. His eyes were hard and you felt the rejection without even hearing it. You started to release him but he grabbed your wrist and pulled you back down, your face beside his. “What are you doing?” he asked, staring at you. You shook your head against his, trying to stop your tears from falling. “What do you mean by this?” he asked. “I’m sorry,” you apologised with a whisper. He pulled your arm away and turned his chair, facing you. You stood in front of him feeling all sorts of vulnerabilities. You didn’t look at him, too worked up. “When did you come back?” he questioned, his expression unreadable. “Last week.” Your heart couldn’t slow down. You were nervous and you were jumpy. You wanted to hug him but you also wanted to cry. You didn’t know what to feel then. “You didn’t call me,” he stated, frowning. “I didn’t know if you wanted me to,” you mumbled. He went silent for next few seconds, just quietly staring into your eyes. “I was mad at you,” he suddenly said. “I know,” you murmured, dropping your eyes in shame. “I tried to hate you.” Ow. You didn’t know how bad it hurt for him to say that. “I tried to forget you.” You felt the guilt take over you. “But I couldn’t. No matter how hard I tried.” “Jaehyun…” “Even after everything, after 2 years…” he breathed. He reached out and held your smaller hands in his large ones. “I still…” You lifted your eyes to look at him. “I still love you.” You closed your eyes in gratefulness, revelling in his confession. “I’m so, so sorry,” you cried. “I should have talked to you before. I should have asked you before I agreed. I should have trusted that you would listen. I should have-“ “Shh,” he shushed you. “It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re back now.” You nodded with tears in your eyes. “I am.” The strength in your legs gave out. You leaned forward and hugged him. It was clear how badly you missed him. It felt like the two years never existed. He still felt the same as you stood between his legs and he held you tight against his body. “I love you, Jaehyun,” you professed. He let you go and you stared into his brown eyes. His hands on your waist slid up to your neck and you mirrored his action. Bending, you closed your eyes and you kissed him once. You pulled back to see his soft eyes looking at you lovingly. He smiled slightly and as he grabbed you and pulled you back to his lips. It wasn’t an innocent kiss this time ‘round. He went all in, kissing you like you were oxygen and he was a dying man. He dragged your body close and wrapped his arms around your waist. Once you were out of breath, you broke away. His eyes were burning when he said, “Don’t ever let me go again.” You exchanged eye-contact for a second before you nodded. “Never.” You hugged him tight, your hands combing through his hair and his head against your chest, arms tight around you. Jung Jaehyun was yours again. Finally. 

A/n: I hope you guys enjoyed it! I’m thinking of taking in requests so do feel free to drop me a request and I’ll try my best to write a good fic/imagine. Thanks for supporting, guys! hehe